Adeptus Ridiculous - INQUISITION: INNOCENCE PROVES NOTHING | Warhammer 40k Lore

Episode Date: May 25, 2022

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another episode of the Adeptus Ridiculous Podcast. My name is D.K. Diamantis. My co-host is Bricky. And we're going to be getting some, I guess it's a special long episode or something, as far as I know. So I'm really kind of hype about it. So let's not waste too much time on the intro.

But if you enjoy today's episode, hand over to patreon.com slash Adeptus Ridiculous. Consider supporting the podcast. We have a new HD poster for the $15 tier. It is a wonderful, classy ad mech poster. that doesn't have any overused memes or jokes relating to ad mech and their affinity for toasters.

But yeah, patreon.com slash adeptus, ridiculous if you want to support the channel. Bricky, do we have a new book club? I was actually going to give you the choice on the book club at the end of today's episode. Oh, boy, let's go. So we'll do that later. But, of course, merch, check out Orchidate.com.

The dice are fully restocked. Grab some while you can. Also, we do have a deal going on. If you get two items of any kind of a Dept's Fidiculous-based merchandise, you get 10% off. So that's happening all the way till when I feel like stopping it. So yeah, just, you know, if you get two things, two Adiric items, you get 10% off your order. Yay. Hell yeah.

Let's go. Let's go. What a deal? What a steal. Let's go. Let's go. So, yeah, the book club, I'll tell. I have a couple options and I'll give you them at the end of the video.

But today may not necessarily be a long episode. It is simply a big episode. Oh, okay. And I'll explain more after I give you a quote. A quote. Oh, boy, I'm going to fuck this up, aren't I? We're back into the quotes. We're back, we're back, baby.

Okay, okay. I'm ready, I'm ready. All right. Heresy is like a tree. Its roots lie in the darkness whilst its leaves, wave in the sun into those who suspect not it has an attractive and pleasing appearance. Truly, you can prune away its branches or even cut the tree to the ground, but it will grow up again ever the stronger and ever more calmly. Yet all while the root grows thick and black, gnawing at the bitter soil, drawing its nourishment from the darkness, and growing even greater and more deeply in it. Entrenched such is the nature of heresy and this is why is so hard to destroy for it must be

Eradicated leaf branch trunk and root it must be exercised utterly or it will return all the stronger time and time again Until it is too great to destroy then we are all doomed Wow, that's a great quote holy shit So initial thoughts, got to be some sort of crazy Imperium thing because, you know, it's heresy and you got to, if it's heretical, you got to burn it to its core and get rid of it. Otherwise, you're screwed. So initial thought is it's some sort of a crazy inquisitor. Because the inquisitors love to seek out heresy. Burn it.

Or maybe. This is going to seem obvious because it's you. episode you're excited about, I want to say sisters, because they're, you know, they're pretty like, oh my God, heresy. How could you turn heretical? That's why we hate the Astardis, because they have a pension for turning traitor. So those are my two directions that I'm going,

either Inquisitor or some sort of sisters thing. Yeah, several options is cheating. DK, think less. Use less brain. Less brain. I'll give you five seconds, five, four, three, two, Quisitors. One.

All right, bam, you got it. Let's go. Let's go. Let's go. Yes. You just had to think less.

Think less. Do more. Let's go. I'm proud of you. We are finally covering the Inquisitors. Now this is going to be a multiple part series. This is part one. We will have a part two later on.

Today we are going into the founding. talking a bit about what Inquisitor is and separating them from their kind of meme situation and then in the next episode we'll talk a bit more about the various orders, the retinue they tend to move around with and a little bit more on some of the well they're probably going to cover Radical Imperitin

in this one but mainly the people they run around with as well as like different ordos and that kind of stuff. But yes, also because I'm just going to do this because fuck everyone, I want this to be a three-part series. We're going to do two on Inquisitors, and in the third episode, I am going to force everybody to listen to the audio, drama, horror story,

Watcher in the Rain, because it involves an Inquisitor, and I think is a good way to look at them in their creepy fashion. And it gives me a way to force everyone to read that really fucking good audio horror book. It's only an hour in, like, 20 minutes. It's great. So we'll have, like, a mini book club, episode. We'll talk a little bit more about it after we finish up our inquisitorial discussion.

That's right. You were telling me about Watcher in the rain a little while ago and how good it was. So I'm actually excited. I'm good for that. I think that sounds like a great idea. It's very good. So, the Inquisition. Another inquisitor quote comes from a certain man known as Eisenhorn, which is a very popular book. And he says, I'm excusing a lot because I recognize the trauma and the loss you have suffered. But my patience isn't limitless, unlike my authority. Damn. Yeah, he's tired of listening to your bullshit. Limitless authority.

Oh, no. Skill issue. Yes. Oh, L plus ratio plus limitless authority. So the Inquisition with their wonderful inquisitorial slogan, if I'm not incorrect, it is Innocentia nihil probat. My pronunciation is probably very bad because it's Latin and I'm bad at that. But it basically means innocence proves nothing. Oh, no.

Oh, yes. This is so imperium. This is like imperium to the nth degree. All right, go ahead. Well, it's an interesting, it's an interesting one because of, just just because of it, like, the idea that, okay, innocence proves nothing is their slogan, so to speak. But it makes sense when you go more into it. That's the most important part. But so, the Inquisition was originally, or is fully known as the Holy Orders of the Emperor's Inquisition.

That's its full name. and it was personally created by Malkador the Sigelite, Regent of Terra, way back when. It was created and it was founded immediately after the awful drop site massacre of Isvan 3. Was Isfant 3 the Dropside Massacre? No, whatever Isfon was the drop mat. Whatever Isfon was the drop set massacre. We get the end.

Well, no, it's specifically Isfon 3. Okay, yeah, I think this is the... No, no, this phone three is not the dropside massacre. That's Isfant 5. Isfant 3 was the virus bombing one, I believe. Oh, neither were very happy times. Neither is great. Yeah, I believe that's the case.

So it's fun three. So basically what happens is that right after that, the emperor asked Malcador to create a special group with unquestionable mind, loyalty, courage, and strength to help root out problems because this is when they found out about Horace being a traitor and all these kind of things. So that's why Malcador, who was, remember, the second most powerful psycher inhumanity, only down to the Big E as number two. I wonder if he was even stronger than Magnus.

He was just like an old man. But he was like, he had gigabrain. He looked like Modoc. I would imagine pre-heresy maybe, but I imagine post-heresy Magnus has got to be so juiced up on chaos that there's no way, right? He's also Biggie's son, so probably not. That's true. He is a primark.

He is certainly the strongest human cycle. Yeah. But he created this group, and he sought out 12 individuals. Now, these 12 individuals were eight Space Marines. and four imperial lords and administrators. Now, a whole lot of the inquisitions past is just not around anymore. And this is the humorous because it involves two ordos. One is known as the Ordo Originatus,

and this is a particular inquisitorial order that tries to uncover as much information about the humans' past as possible. But unfortunately, they're at odds with this group called the Ordo Origina. who deliberately tries to obscure them because they believe that any advantage from their can be used against them by their enemy. That name is so on the nose, the Ordos Redactis. Oh, what did they do? And the Ordo Originatus? Yeah.

What are they looking for? G.W. has some, sometimes the names are just so, so cool. And other times it's like, what did you get your 10-year-old to think of this shit? Like, what happened? Yeah, it's true. You look at like, Zerick, the Silent King. You're like, that's so cool.

And then you look at Angron. You're like, oh. Anger. One of what his story is. Yeah. Anywho. So a lot of it is, and the founding is a little hard to grasp. And this is one of those like, oh, what happened in the founding?

Like, I don't really know. It's all been kind of covered up. But Magador picked these 12 people. Eight great, or eight space marines. Shit. Eight space marines and four imperial lords. And they were brought to the emperor secretly during the actual siege of terror itself. When they were getting attacked, they were brought secretly into the area.

And what this became were these four imperial lords and administrators, human-y-human boys, were then used to create the foundations of the Inquisition, the original conclave of the Inquisition. these eight space marines were the original founders to become the Grey Knights Oh okay so this is how the Grey Knights got started

this is how the Grey Knights got started because you'll find that all of the Ordo Majoris, which are the three main bodies the Ordo Hereticus, Zenos and Malius all have a special group associated to them so those eight Space Marines be created the Grey Knights and then these four humans were the original conclave of the Inquisition.

Now, the thing to note about the Inquisition in back in the day is that people who try to find information about the Inquisition, try to learn more about it, that kind of stuff, tend to go missing. Not surprising. As we know, the Inquisition is the secret police. They are the CIA, the FBI, the KGB, all combine, the SS, all mixed together. with unlimited authority and given the chance to be a witch hunters. So, yeah, but as we'll find soon, the exterminatus everything is definitely more of a meme. Most to all inquisitors are pretty intelligent and they have a nice, deaf touch.

But often, if you try to find out the past of the Inquisition, that will normally either one attract an Inquisitor themselves. and they will well they might ask you because of you're a very intelligent way of learning stuff to maybe join their retinue like hey wow you found a lot about us your services could be useful you should you should join me

that's your only option yeah I assume if you're like no I don't want to join you you guys are shady as hell look at all this bad stuff I found about I assume you get a bolt around to the head or something generally worse your lifeless body tends to be discovered in some kind of harrowing predicament to immediately call into question the things they found.

Like, they might find your body in a room full of a bunch of chaosy shit, kind of like a cop setting up someone. Oh, wow. So to hide anything that they may have found that may have been detrimental to the Inquisition, they set them up to look like an unreliable source so that even if you do find all their research, it is non-reliable and just gets trashed.

The Inquisition watches everyone. They don't like eyes on them. But the Inquisition itself became its modern form a bit in the 32nd millennium after the formal birth of the imperial cult, which if you'll remember is the religious state of the Imperium. Yeah. This is, before that, though,

was known as saying as the first. hour. First hour is a little bit weird. There's not a whole lot on it, but basically the four people there was a split. Now, two of the four original humans that Malcador gathered wanted to find a way to resurrect the emperor. That was their main goal. Find a way to fix him. The other two believe that he has already moved on as like a god in the warp and to try to do. So, something like that would be like screwing with the natural order of things and would not help them out at all and it would in fact cause more harm than good so the people who want to resurrect the emperor these two people were known as promius and moriana and eventually with the creation of the imperial

cult the religion a promius and moriana ended up splitting again because they eventually went to go find a way to resurrect the emperor they left terra with the cult the two of them split off with Moriana, believing that she would do whatever she could possibly do to achieve her aim of resurrecting the emperor. Anything. Now, this was fucking frightening to Promeus because he was like, oh my God, Moriana is going to use fucking chaos. Like, to, like, anything, she's going to use the dark powers to resurrect the emperor.

Oh, my God. So Promeus created an army of followers to attack her. This made her flee into the eye of terror. Yikes. And eventually Promeus and his group known as the Promians came into contact with the Inquisition, the newer one, and kind of resurrected themselves together into this one major inquisitorial faction

known as the Resurrectionist Inquisitorial Faction. So for a pretty hefty amount of the Inquisition, resurrecting the Emperor is a big part of their goal. Naturally, okay. It might even be the main. main goal of everyone, but they often are more, like, based around keeping away the threats across, like on the other side, keeping away the threats of the Imperium more so than this thing, but I think it's like always in the back of their head.

Yeah, okay. Kind of like Mechanicus do all their creepy, crappy stuff, but they're always, like, in the pursuit of knowledge is their main thing. Good old Resurrectionists. Yeah, it's, uh, the first. hour is a little bizarre. There might be a, it might be like a book or something going on with that, because it's a very short blurb. And I feel like there should be more going on here.

But if there's maybe a book or some kind of old lore, I don't know. But regardless, that's what it said. So that's what I'm telling you. All right. Anywho, moving on from there, the religious state, of course, the cult is what kind of made the imperial inquisition the way it is. Obviously, a lot more religious and zealot. Yeah. The Marines with the Malcador himself were a arm of the Ordo Malius.

So the three major ordos we have, the Ordo Majores, Malius, Zenos, and Hereticus. The Ordo Malius is entirely dedicated to the hunting of demons. Full-on horrors of the warp, demon-killing. I don't think I'd want to be in the Malius. That sounds like a very dangerous order to be in if you're always fighting demons. That's why you get to have the Grey Knights on your side

because the Grey Knights are in a sense an arm of the Inquisition. In fact, on a lot of their armor, you can see Inquisitorial seals. And so because of that, they are a massive arm of the Ordo Malius. That's the point of the Grey Knights. They work with Inquisitors all the time. So I was just,

real quick. Does that make the Grey Knights a little better in the tabletop or a little stronger since, well, I would assume against demons anyway, the Grey Knights are just like, uh-oh, you're fucked because that's kind of their job is like they help the Oral Malleus kill demons. So if you had like a chaos, demon faction against the Grey Knights, I assume the Grey Knights will be heavily favored. The Grey Knights have a lot of extra power in their, like against demons, yeah. They have extra buffs against demons. It doesn't mean you get an auto win, obviously, but you will do better against demons. Yeah.

Yes, and also the amount of gray knights that have been possessed by demons is a grand total of zero. Wow. They are, like, the most pure of will. Yeah. Well, I was going to say, that's actually pretty impressive because you would think with spending so much time fighting demons and being around demons that eventually, you know, A demon would slip in here or there. Granted, they might not last long, but you would think that

constantly being around demons, one would trickle through here, there. The Grey Knights for a while were not a very liked faction because they felt like they were making some like, you liked Marines? Well, these are Marine Marines. Every Grey Knight is only one in every thousand.

Every single one is a cyker. They're all so strong and strong and powerful and they're so pure of will their minds are perfect, which is why the Caldor Drago thing is kind of a meme. But that's kind of the point is that they need to be exceptionally resistant to demonic influence.

We'll talk more about this guy the moment we talk about Grey Knights, but one of my favorite characters in the Grey Knights has a guy named Castellan Crow. And what... Yeah, he's cool. And what he has, he actually has

a demonic sword. It's called the Blanketka. Black Blade of Antoir, I think. Whoa, is that as many? Yeah, I think someone maybe gave it a little bit more color in that one, but yeah, that's as mini. It's actually recently updated. Holy shit, that's sort of so cool. Yeah, and the thing is, is that the black blade is one of the strongest,

demonically infused blades. Like, it's a demon inside that weapon, and it's one of the most powerful things ever. But he's in a particular group of Grey Knights known as the Purify. And so what he does is he has the sword on him at all times and he sits alone in his chambers away from everyone else at all times. And the sword is constantly speaking to him. It is never endingly like, like use my power, use the stuff. Like I am very strong. You'll become everything you desire.

Like nonstop. And he just sits there with the sword and ignores it. And if anyone gets too close to him, they'll be tempted. by the sword. Wow. So he's just like constantly just there. And he doesn't even use it as like,

he doesn't even use the demonic powers in the sword. He uses it as if it's like a piece of sharpened steel. Um, then the demon might do some crazy shit. But like often on the battlefield, the demon will speak to all the enemies and they'll all like swarm him like

he's taking agro. And he just uses, he's like a master swordsman. So that's the demon. the idea is that he's so pure of will. He just sits there with this sword at all times. And it just constantly. Yeah, it just beckons to him all the time and he's just there. Like, mm-mm, no way. Wow. So does he keep the sword so that it won't fall into the wrong hands and possess someone? Because if it did, that would be big trouble because it's such a strong sword.

He, I don't think he can destroy it. Maybe he can like banish the demon, but then it'll just go back to the warp and then find a different host. Yeah, so it's safe with him without it. Exactly. Oh, I was going to say, if you're not using the power, why keep the sword? Then it was like, oh, because, oh, okay. Gray knights often, if you notice their bodies are covered in books among various other, like chains and paraphernalia, that's because the great knights often have the true names of demons, like around.

And so they literally have words of banishment. They'll speak. the true name of the demon that like massively weakened them and then they can kill them. Nice. It's pretty dope. Anyway, that's a great episode. It's a whole thing there. They sound really cool, though. I got to say, great, that sounds dope.

They're fun. You like psychers. Every single one of them is a psycher. So it's a good time. You're talking to a thousand sons fan, so I mean, you know. Yeah, they hate each other. No kidding. In the 32nd millennium after that, this was the War of the Beast.

And if you remember, this is when an orc war boss, known as the beast threats and terror itself. And after this, created the next Majoris chapter, the Ordo Zenos. And the Ordo Zenos is obviously entirely dedicated to dealing with aliens. Gazco Throcka book, that was the Ordo Zenos. And attached to them was the Death Watch chapter. Okay, yep. That's true. The Death Watch were pretty connected in the Gasco book.

That's fair. Mm-hmm. The Death Watch are entirely dedicated to the hunting learning study of the alien. And they are taken from many, many different kinds of chapters. Anyone can join the Death Watch. They have little seals on their arms and stuff. And they're like, they're basically specops. They are Speck-Ops alien hunters.

And in-game, yes, they are better against aliens. They have special rules for certain aliens. dealing with various guys. They've got some really cool-looking teams. There was the Space Wolf in the book. You'll learn about like Ultramarines and Dark Angels. Like everyone joins the Death Watch because it's basically just them saying to themselves, like, I've seen what the alien can do.

I've seen the horrors that they can provide. I am going to dedicate my life to deliver. with aliens. Is the Death Watch considered the, like, would you only send, like, the best of the best from your chapter to them? Or is it just anyone that's like, no, I just, I hate Zenos and I want to fuck Zenos up, I'm going. And it's not necessarily like, you have to be the best.

The Death Watch are, it's a personal choice. Okay. It's not like you're scouted to be in the Death Watch or something. I mean, maybe you are scouted. I mean, they might, the Inquisition, Ordo Zenos might. come around and be like, hey, I want you to hear or something. But often it is a

Marine that, I mean, if we make, when we make a Death Watch episode, we'll talk more about it. But yeah, yeah. As far as I'm concerned, it is a Marine that says, I want to fight the alien. I've seen the horrors of it. I want to specifically fight nothing but the

alien because I want to do that because I think it's important. Gotcha. Also, they have really sick armor. The black and gold is really cool. Black gold. Yeah, and often they'll have like a shoulder pad that is their chapter to kind of show their own heraldry. So if you make like Death Watch on the tabletop, you might like mix and match. Some ultramarine gears, some fists there. Ultra Marines.

Yeah, well, like this, this like Terminator squad here, you know, there's like some yellow over there. There's like a Blood Angels probably there. There's ultramarine there. It's fun. Ultra Marine. The other. Yeah, whatever. Shut up.

Ah. And then the final Ordo Majoris we have was, created in the 36 millennium directly after the age of apostasy and the beheading of Doge Van Dyer. Ah, the boy. The boy. Oro Hereticus, which is the militant arm along with the Adepta sororitas. So the Sisters of Battle are the militant arm of the church, the Ecclesiarchy, and the main fighting force for the Ordo Hereticus. Hell yeah, let's go, sisters.

Let's go. Now obviously, the sisters of battle are, if you look at their armor, they tend to have a ton of the inquisitorial rosette on their armor. They have their, floor,

fleurly, whatever the fuck. Flore de Lee. Yeah, whatever, some French bullshit. As you can see, like, on their armor, they have a ton, like there's the inquisitional symbol

right there on the chest, you know? Yeah, yeah. It's all over the place. Oh, yeah. The classic, the classic sisters about the classic order for the fucking up of heretics

so those are the main three there are also the order minoris which are some smaller ones but there's like 10 of those and we'll cover those probably in the next episode okay but so yeah each ordo is made up of the inquisitors and their inquisitorial retinue but they also have a much more hefty combat force

just in case and that would be the Grey Knights, Death Watch, and Sisters of Battle. Okay. Now, allegiance to an order is not a dedicated master. An inquisitor can

freely move between orders as they'd like. Think of an order more as like a field of study. Oh, okay. So if they are like, if they are the most apt at dealing with demons, they'll be part of the Ordo Malius. But maybe something crazy happens.

Like the Octarius War, all these fucking Xenos are on their way. So a lot of Ordomalius might move on to the Xenos for a bit, start learning more about them, start trying to figure things out because this is where they need it right now. You can kind of move between them. The difference is that naturally you are constantly dealing with problems. problems in all sorts of fields. Oh, yeah. Like, even though, yeah, like Shai says here, Eisenhorn is from the Ordo Zenos,

but he's constantly dealing with chaos. Because you just deal with your problems. It's a field of study. Oh, okay. So the inquisters aren't bound to one order. They can sort of go to whichever one they want. Whichever one they deem is the most important for that time frame. Right, right, right, right.

Gotcha, gotcha, got you, got you. Okay, cool. And no one really needs to approve. prove them in any way. They have no superiors. This is the Inquisition. Limitless authority. So who's going to stop them anyway?

Even if it was a problem, who's going to stop them? That's the thing is that the I like the meme of the Inquisitor that's just like, ah, heresy, exterminatus. Like, it's funny. I like, it's a good meme. But exterminatus, unless you're Kripman, is a seriously final resort.

Most Inquisitors won't do an exterminatist for their entire lives. In fact, like most, like, maybe one out of ten inquisitors and out their entire lives might even consider it. The destruction of entire imperial world in consigning billions to their death is incredibly fucking rare. Yeah, it is the last resort among last resorts.

It is a percentage of a percentage. But even if 0.000000,000, 1% of Inquisitors ever doing exterminatists in their life. A million worlds. So I do remember that, obviously, Cripman crazy, Crazy Inquisitor that starts exterminatizing. Refresh my memory, because I don't specifically remember what happens when an inquisitor goes a little too power hungry,

starts getting a little too shitty, and needs to be taken down a penitist. because they theoretically have limitless authority and they answer to no one. But when they start exterminatising planets like Kripman did and start just like an Octarius war, somebody needs to rein them in. How do you rein in an inquisitor? I think there are two options. One is that you excommunicate them from the Inquisition.

However, I don't think that's happened to anyone but. Critman. I think it might be the only person because he's very smart and he needs to be there for the Octarius War. Normally you just kill them. That's true. In a bunch of the books we've seen, we've seen a few inquisitors just get shot and killed and blown up via psychop powers.

So yeah, that's fair. Or another inquisitor or acquisitors deem their actions to be no longer helping the Imperium and they just die. Then they just, they find them and they kill them. It happens so rarely though. It's such a rare situation. Inquisters will butt heads all the time within their ordo. What to do is the best, of course.

But rarely does anyone go so far off a deep end that they need to be removed or killed? You said you could excommunicate an inquisitor? What's the process for excommunicating one? I only know of one and that's Crittman. Okay. He's the only example of an Inquisitor just going absolutely bat-shit haywire crazy and needing to be like super ultra-dealt with. I, there might be, there's probably some others that have been excommunicated. They obviously have a system for it.

Sure. But like it says here in the excommunication section, an Inquisitor has the power to declare an individual or sometimes an organization or planet as excommunicator's traitor. which is an individual or a planet. This declaration generally has them accused by the human race and then they are hunted down and killed for the good of the Imperium. Ah, okay. I don't, I genuinely can't think of any other inquisitor that has been done by that.

Maybe there have been others, but like it's so rare. Yeah. The inquisitors are really fucking good at their jobs and they are mentally, insanely, like, just so strong that anything like this, they'll bicker, but it's the difference between. To them, it's like, what do you bring to the bake sale?

Are you cooking cookies or cake? And maybe they'll bitch like fucking Karen women in Orange County about it. But like, they're still doing the bake sale, you know? Yeah, yeah. Like, they still want to raise money for X or Y. Like, it's, it's not like, all right, Susan, that's it's it's it's not like, all right, Susan, that's it's it's it, you're out of here. Like, no, it's like,

it's just, it's just wine. It's so rare. That's so interesting because, like, and we've alluded to this before, that, like, the common meme is like, oh, yeah, inquisitor, exterminate on us that planet. And that's kind of what I came in expecting

where, like, these sort of, like, you know, these holier than now, limitless authority, guys that are constantly abusing their power, can't be kept in check, are always doing some dastardly shit, and are always up to some weird stuff. And apparently that rarely happens. And they're actually just really good at their job. And the meme is just a meme. Ah, shy has a very good quote here. An inquisitor declared guilty by a trial of their peers typically declared excommunicator traitor, and is that immediately

executed for heresy then and there. Inquisitors found guilty. in absentia will be declared excommuniconstrators and a warrant will be issued for the arrest and execution across the sector or beyond. Being excommunicated is not streamed inquisitor of any real status, for they are still able to command the fear and respect of others simply by virtue of who they are. In the eyes of imperial law, there might be a criminal and a traitor, but far removed from the centers of authority on most worlds of the imperialum without a powerful inquisitorial presence, they remain an inquisitor in every respect. Whoa. So, so yeah, naturally, like, if you're in some world,

and you've been excommunicated as a traitor, like the world doesn't fucking know that. You're still an inquisitor, and that's horrifying. Yeah, that is a horrifying thought that like an inquisitor could be excommunicated for being a traitor, but for all intents and purposes, he is still an inquisitor

and still has all the authority of an inquisitor. That's, ooh, I don't like that. That's skin-crawlingly. I don't like it. like it. I believe that is why good old um Cripman is

he's been excommunicated maybe he's the only one who is uh has been survived because you know they need him for the Octarius war they just want to stop blowing up fucking plants stop exterminating everything so moving from that

it kind of goes into the idea of like like an inquisitor is a detective. Pretty much first and foremost, whenever I think of an inquisor, I think of a very good detective. They go, they follow leads, they learn stuff,

they have a ship, they have a crew, they tend to, they make their way around, and the only people who are above them in authority are the high lords of terror.

Now, there are other inquisitorial ranks. There are masters, grandmasters, and lord. Now you probably heard Lord a few times, Lord Inquisitor or the Inquisitor Lord. Yeah, yeah. These are generally not actual ranks above.

They are a sign of status and prestige because they're such important and powerful lords. There are a couple others. There is the Tarran Lord Inquisitor, which is a like upgrade given by like the high lords of terra. But there is no formal hierarchy. Everything is entirely by reputation and influence. So a Lord Inquisitor might be better than a regular inquisitor, and an inquisitor might answer to them, but they don't necessarily have to. It is more like you listening to someone who has had so much more experience than you.

Right. And if you want to become a Lord Inquisitor, all you need is a Lord Inquisitor to the Lord Inquisitor to the Lord Inquisitor to the Lord Inquisitor to, then have him and two of their peers, or him or her, and two of their peers take a regular inquisitor and say, yeah, you're a lord now. That's about it. So it's just a popularity contest. Yeah, but like it's the idea of like this person's a veteran. They know what the fuck they're doing. I'll listen to them. They may not have more power, so to speak, but they are. They do kind of have more power, but kind of don't. Grandmasters are very often an inquisitor lore that has a standing in like an entire sector or subsector, like a full group of planets, like a system, you know, like

that kind of stuff. When Inquisitor is around, the thing important to note is that if you can see an Inquisitor, like, just on a planet, they're doing that on purpose. You can only see them because they want you to see them. they will never make themselves known if they don't have to. Because an inquisitor that is known and seen creates a hefty amount of problems. Sometimes an inquisitor will specifically state, I am coming to this planet to search down a lead.

And they'll tell the planet that. And the planet will sometimes just start writing. Yeah, because they want to... They want to prove themselves. They want to prove that they are. that they're so just and that they'll like start going out like witch hunting people who they don't like

to say they're like yeah look at this I killed these three people they were talking about chaos and Inquisar is doing that on purpose they're trying to root someone out you know like for example Oh go ahead I was going to ask that something they often do but it sounds

like you have an example Actually I was an example the opposite Sometimes they do it depends on what's good for their their like their investigation. For example, Amber Lee Vale, Caiapus Kane. Oh, yeah.

You would have never known she was there. She was just a singer lady. Right? She had a whole disguise. You would never fucking know she was in Quisitor. And the moment Kane realized she was, he was like, oh my God, fuck. Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck.

Yeah, Kane was suspecting somebody completely different. He wasn't even suspect. Yeah. He just wanted to get laid. And he's like, oh, shit. You're all, you what? You. I put in a couple, you wanted a couple of ice cubes. Oh.

I only put, oh, you only put in one. Yeah. You, what? You what? I love that. I'm an inquisitor. Such a good meme. But, yeah, so the, because inquisitors, they sometimes will need to conduct all our stuff in secret.

Sometimes they, in order to conduct their research, they need to make it clear. They want to make the planetary governor sweat. a little bit because maybe he's the one they're worried about. Ah, yes, yes, yes. They follow leads. They interrogate people. They torture. They psychically, like, they have all kinds of methods.

And as an inquisitor, you are a stone cold piece of shit. Stone cold killer. Yeah. And it makes, you know, they're frightening for that reason. Oh, yeah. actually goes into two of the types of Inquisitors we have Not as many

types, but there's two. There's the radicals and the Puritans. Oh. Now a Puritan is, you know, by the grace of the emperor, by the importance of humanity. I will not sacrifice my humanity

to get this thing done. I will use the power of X, Y, and Z. A radical is any means necessary. Yeah. I was thinking that was going to be the distinction. One is going to be a little more low-key, and the other one is just like, no,

fucking scorched earth. I'm going in. So, yeah. Yes, the inquisitor in Gascold, that's a radical inquisitor. The idea to take and talk to an orc, that's radical. The example they have here is great.

It says, an inquisitor can read from the grimroar malefact and can use its knowledge to close a warp rift. but in doing so they risk opening their soul to chaos and becoming the very thing they would fear. A Puritan would never do this. It is reckless and unnecessary and they would find another method to do so even if it dooms a dozen worlds.

Okay. There's a good quote from an anonymous inquisitor that says he who is not a Puritan in his youth has no heart. He who is still a Puritan in his maturity has no brain. Oh I like that That's a good quote So sometimes like

Sometimes there's even a thing that Inquisers will sometimes carry with them In one of the retinues Called a demon host Oh shit really It is literally a minor demon In the body of a person Shackled and gagged

And sometimes in order to deal with chaos on that They'll bring it with them And converse with the demon because maybe the demon has like a grudge hates he or maybe he's a corn demon and he fucking hates Slanesh and he's like I you know

this is a Slanesh thing over here fuck Slanesh I'll answer your questions I'll help you out because fuck them damn that seems a little heretical but I mean I guess Radical It's necessary Yeah

It's very radical yeah Yeah so sometimes like like There's the picture shy just posted He's branding the fucking demon right there Holy shit. An entire crazy-ass thing of ruin. Like, they'll inquisitor's answer to nobody except for the high lords of terror

and a conclave of their peers. Holy shit. Okay, radicals are, they live up to the name. And, uh, there's something. Now, the only people they cannot command, I believe, are, I know they can hire the assassinorum. I don't think they have any say over the grand master of the assassinorum, because I think they're a high lord of terra.

But I think they can hire an assassin if they need to be, which is crazy fucking power. Because the assassins are rare as rare can be. They are the craziest sons of bitches in the Imperium. They have absolutely no. say over the custodians. I imagine they wouldn't. Yeah, I imagine the custodians are they're completely their own thing and wouldn't have to

answer to anybody, really. I mean, because their whole thing is to protect the emperor, basically. The custodians answer to nobody. The custodians are their own dedicated power because they have their one and only job. They can get the Astardis, of course, to answer to them. it doesn't always work.

To go on. Well, an Inquisitor is not dumb. They realize that if they push their fucking luck with the Astardis, the Astardis might just kill them. Yes. Like, you know, you might be big man, big metal, big rosette, all this crap, but you're standing in front of four. or demigods.

Like, they will, but sometimes, like, they often want to use discretion when it comes to the Astardis, because they do have power over them. But for the same reason why an inquisitor wouldn't just waltz up to a planetary governor that they think is turning the entire place traitor and say, I am going to arrest you now. All of their guards are going to be like, oh, really? Oh, yeah. I don't know about that one.

Like, at the end of the day... At the end of the day, you are just a person. Now, Inquisters are often psychers. They're very well trained. They can probably take on even a couple guards per chance, but they are still just a human. Yeah. They're not a space marine.

They're not in a startis. They're not on that level. Yeah. They need to be cautious. They need to be careful. It's what makes Inquisitor's story so fucking interesting is because so often they don't

have this insane power to them physically. So they need to work with their situation. They need to manage a... Yep, a population. That's why they lie. That's why they're secretive. That's why they're fucking

terrifying because the gorgeous blonde bombshell singer on a towel world might be inquisitorial of the Ordo Zinos and really very vexed. Yep, yep, yep, yeah. With her psycher friend and scribe and etc.

Yep. That's what's frightening. That's what's fucking frightening of them. Your best friend might be an inquisitor who is constantly looking at you and being, you know, what's kind of stuff? And so if you want to bicker with the chapter master of the fucking dark angels, Azrael, whose middle name is black, like black paint or black ink and cover-ups, Your middle name is what document? I don't know what you're talking about, Fall, never heard of it.

Maybe don't ask too much of him? Yeah, maybe don't pick on him. Maybe don't like try and push his buttons. Yeah, definitely. He will snap your neck like a twig, and you will never be seen again. You'd be lucky if that's all they did. If they only snapped your neck, you'd get off lucky. Considering the dark angels, like, psychically mind-probed and

wiped and tortured primaris marines because they came from gilliman. I think that they will, uh, they'll cause problems. Yeah. So you need to be careful with who you're speaking to. Definitely. Ooh. Yikes. Yeah, be careful around that dark angel's guy.

Definitely. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Asrael is, he's a guy. He's a guy. He's a guy. He sounds like a monster, actually, but okay. The Dark Angels, if I had to pick a Space Marine faction, a Loyalist one,

and like, all right, which one of them are the biggest pricks? I'd probably pick the Dark Angels. Poor Dark Angels. Well, I guess they bring it on themselves, actually. But Bricky, how do you, oh, yes, but Bricky, how do you even join the Inquisition? Yeah, Bricky, how now, Brown Cowell? Well, that, wow. There are a couple ways.

Now, one of them, a common way, is the Scola progenium. We are wonderful going the walls, you know. Yeah, brother. Yeah, brother, getting them walls. Mm-hmm. So often if you want to, if you show this, this great mindset, very intelligent, all these kinds of things, you might be taken away from the Scola and be brought as an acolyte. But the interesting part of the Inquisition is that joining the Inquisition is generally on a per inquisitor basis. Oh.

Like, you will be picked out by an Inquisitor and you will then join the retinue as, say, an acolyte or, I think you star as an acolyte. They call like Neophyte. They have various words for it. But then as you work with them more and more, you might. rise in their ranks and become a little bit more intelligent and kind of know more and serve them more as a assistant. And after enough time, the inquisitor might say, I think you've got the makings of an inquisitor. And then they'll have two of their peers sign off on it along with you and say, like, my assistant here, you know, like, I want you to see him, test him, probe him,

that kind of thing. And if he passes it, then he'll join the, then you can become an inquisitor. Oh, okay. So each inquisitor can kind of pick their own air. A little bit, yeah. They can have like a successor. They can, uh, some, some inquisitor, very few inquisters retire, but some do. And they, they might have, have an air.

Like, the world of the 41st millennium is one of the darkest, most horrifying thing that's ever made. But, like, there are times where, have done their job like 150 years. They've done an amazing job, this whole thing, and then they don't believe they can serve the emperor as strong as they used to. So sometimes they'll kind of like when a custodian gets too slow from his age or his reflexes, they'll just retire on a pretty agricultural world.

And they might just be a quiet spy and live a white. life, maybe they'll get a wife. Maybe they'll have some kids, who knows? Didn't you say at one point that retired custodians get, like, they get their own fucking planet to retire to, like dedicated completely to them or something? No, the custodians put on like this like robe and they kind of go out and try to find things

for the custodians, which is always kind of funky because they're so big. No, there was the guardsman that found the STC to make knives for the Astardis. And they all were given a whole world. For knives, that's right. You're right. Yeah, that was the big, cool part of the end of Gant's Ghosts,

where the bad guy was like, yeah, they found this STC, and they were all given a full plagricultural agricultural world for a machine that made knives. I love that. It's so great. It's kind of cool that concept. Like, there is some hope and some kind of kind of. that goes on in the 40th, the 1st millennium. Can you imagine just like the ability to live like 200 years thanks to the medicine?

And you just get a planet. You have like a beautiful forest world, maybe water planet with like fauna and all this stuff. You can just make like your little house with your family. And like that sounds so nice. Yeah. And then the tyrannid invade. And then the tyrannins invade. Hopefully you die by them.

And you get turned into soup. Soup. Soop's on. That's what's interesting about the Inquisition is that they're so all-encompassing in their power. Not only can they do and demand almost anything, they create more of their own through their own words. Yeah. And this is something that's interesting, and this is a slight problem.

It's been proven time and time again that the Imperium are a terrible, terrible fucking faction, and they don't need to be that way. The leagues of Voton being coming out and the Tao are proof of this. But the interesting part about the Imperium is the fact that they got this way due to, you know, the slow corrupting of their government and the rotting carcass they became. So, you know, like I made a video a bit ago where I'm like, it doesn't, you don't have to agree with them. You just have to believe that they would become that way. And that's the point, is that despite how fucking terrible they are,

like, you know why they became that way, even though it's not right and they could have done better. Oh, yeah. Shai said the Imperium survives despite how bad they are, not thanks to how bad they are. I was going to say, like, if they weren't as evil as they were, um, it would be better off for them because then they, you know, how many of their citizenry and their soldiers and whatever,

Have they slaughtered needlessly because they broke some dumb rule that nobody cares about? Or they thought they were heretical or they thought they were dealing with chaos, but they weren't. And it's exterminated out of this whole planet because blah, blah, blah. And it's like, you tell me to be that bad. That's not even scratching the surface. That's just minor stuff that they do. That's the little shit that they do. And like, we don't even think about ad mech.

Like, you literally can't invent. Yeah. You can't fucking invent technology. like holy shit that's so bad yeah so yeah I mean their zealotry is probably causing them way more problems than it's fixing they don't have to be that way

they could be so much better and stronger if they just weren't such assholes shy has an example here inquisitor Fyodor Keramazov which is one of the main characters of the text of speech thing and I can't look at him the same now is an inquisitor lord of the order of also known as the pyrofin judge of the Salem Proctor.

For this inquisitor, there is no defense or mercy in his court. Even the innocent are guilty of wasting his valuable time and are set of flame with the many witches and traitors he always discovers among the societies he comes to judge. Wow. Yeah, he's a piece of shit. Yep. You don't have to be like that to fight off the horrors of the, uh,

40K. Like, you don't. Um, there, like, there is a great quote on the back of my custodian novel, uh, uh, uh, codex. Uh, actually, you know, I'm gonna grab that. Hold on. Yeah, yeah. We, uh, we'll, we'll, we'll just, we'll just, we'll just entertain the people, you know, da, da da da da da da da. There it is. Um, um, the emperor's realm is a festering ruin of overcrowded worlds drowning in their own ignorance and fear. It is a tumble down ghetto

that burns from end to end with the flames of war. They do not deserve their emperor. They do not deserve us. None of that alters the fact that our duty must be done. So like even the custodians themselves are like, we fucking suck.

But if the emperor dies, we are actually boned. And so despite it all, we will do our duty. Like the inquisitors, The custodians remind me a lot of Gilemon where they'd realize what's happening, but it's so down bad

that they need to work with it and try to slowly repair it, even though it's really hard. Yeah, I was going to say, thinking about the custodians are probably very similar to Gilliman, and that they probably know what the emperor would have wanted

and they look out at the Imperium, and they're like, nope, that's not it. This sucks. But same with Gilleman. You can't just tear down the Imperator Imperium because, well, you're fucked. You don't really have time to rebuild. You're kind of stuck with what you got.

Basically. This all, this entire tangent is now me talking about how, despite that, like I said, what the inquisors do are awful. What the Imperium does is awful. They survive despite how bad, not because of how bad. Though despite this all, I want to kind of get this into your head a little bit and get all the viewers this into your head a little bit and get all the viewers this into your head.

Because this is important. The Imperium at large doesn't know Chaos Space Marines, chaos, or any of that stuff, and a lot of Xenos factions even exist. They don't even realize that Tyrannids exist or Necrons even exist. They probably know that like Orcs and Eldar.

They don't know the different kinds of chaos gods. They know that there's the warp, and I think they know that there's like the dark gods, but they don't know what is what. They don't know like, Chaos Marines are a thing. There's just a legend, a myth. Huh.

And this is part of the, yeah, this is part of the, like, the average citizen. The average citizen. Yeah, yeah. I know the normal citizenry have no idea about like chaos, chaos, chaos gods, chaos space marines and stuff, but the Inquisitors and stuff do, right? Oh, of course. Absolutely. They know everything.

Okay, yeah. Because of this, the phrase in ascension the heel pro bot, Innocence proves nothing, can be taken literally. I made a video go, a video just a bit ago, or I talked about Joel from The Last of Us, and how he, I guess, spoil us for the first game, he basically slaughters an entire operational medical facility at the end of the apocalypse so he could save his daughter,

which is, you know, very bad. That's very, very bad, yeah. But the whole point of the game is setting up that fast. that you understand he would do this despite it being immoral. Yeah, to say he would do anything for his daughter. Anything. A person can not show a single sign of a problem. They can be, they can be tortured and questioned and questioned and be completely innocent of any and all crimes.

And there is a demon awaiting in them the entire time. there is a person who has no memory of anything and when psychically probed nothing will come up and then they're of code phrase spoken and then they're an alpha legion person and then they immediately destroy an entire planet the word the problem often that the inquisition faces is that when you are dealing with

infected people via gene stealers chaos corrupted individuals sleeper cells from the chaos space marines and the eyes of the warp often completely innocent people are exactly that completely innocent they have done no crime

they have committed no falsehood and yet given a month they will destroy a sector they will kill trillions well that's that's fair actually I guess I've forgotten about the genes to the thing where they just lie in wait for generations

and then... And so the Inquisition has to treat each and or believes it's right to treat every single individual they come across like this because one slip up, one person they set off, one innocent quote unquote person they gunned down or they torture and mutilate or who, knows could be the thing that destroys billions.

So to them, their word is absolute. Their judgment is true. This is something important for Watcher in the rain. If they deem a person as guilty, they are guilty. There is no proving innocent because the word of the inquisitor is stone. Yeah. How they become guilty is the question. It's not the fact that they can be innocent.

They are guilty. Yeah. What are they guilty for? That's the question. Yeah. And I guess in this world, let's say like an inquisitor's like, oh, yeah, you're guilty. I think you're a jeans dealer or I think you've probably got some deep-rooted chaos stuff in you that you don't know about. Even if they're wrong, I suppose losing one person,

isn't that big a deal? Because if you're wrong about someone being guilty, you've lost one citizen. It is sad and is awful. If you're wrong about someone being innocent and you let them go, it's the planet you could potentially lose. It's like multiple planets that you could lose.

It's like billions of people that could get infected and eat you. So I... That's the thing is that... It's one of those things where they don't have to do the things they do, but it's as if a cop in real life shot every person

instead of making an arrest because they might commit a crime in the future Yeah But in this case The crime might involve a demon killing an entire planet Yeah which is a big risk Right well to them it's a big risk of course Which it doesn't it's not good

I wish they wouldn't do that kind of stuff But I'm trying to to instill upon the idea of how they think. That was a big part. That's the storyline for Watcher in the rain is that this Inquisitor thinks that this person is guilty of something.

And they're like, I'm not guilty of anything. It's like, the Lord Inquisitor has said, you are guilty of this crime. To go against his word is heresy. It doesn't matter if you are quote, innocent. You are guilty of

something. What it is, I will find out, either through torture or et cetera. Damn. Their word is, is not law, it is fact. So if an inquisitor is like, you're guilty, there's nothing you can do about it. Yeah, you're fucked. You're just going to get tortured and you will be killed and there's nothing. Post-mortem, they might find out that you were actually innocent and then just be like, well, I guess it was innocent,

but the consequences of him actually being guilty were far worse, so better safe than sorry. They tend not to care. One more person in the overall, in the overall nature of the galaxy. I mean, sometimes they obviously are wrong, and sometimes they'll admit to their wrongdoing, the good inquisitors. Yeah. But even then, it's like, it's just, this is what happens when you run an investigation. You chaste on every lead. Damn.

Yeah, it's a... That's a... That's a pickle. It's a big pickle. And the problem I have with the 40K fan base, I'm pointing to you, my viewers, is that a lot... There's the occasional people who look at that concept and think the Inquisition is right to do what they do. Oh, no. I disagree.

They are very wrong to do what they do. It's explaining why they do what they do, which... which is the important part. You need to impress upon it. Not that they are right to do it, but that is why they do it. Right. And again,

this is not a guidebook for how you should be. It's just your understanding why these horrible inquisitors do what they do. And again, this is not every inquisitor. This is a hyper-specific

group of inquisitors. Not all of them act this hardcore. Right. But alas, with Fiorador Karamazza, He sets the innocent people on fire. So, you know. But like, you know, Inquisitors, they're generally extraordinarily intelligent, problem-solving,

and nearly unquestioning people. Often in game, there's a leadership mechanic in the game. And there's certain levels, like a guardsman is like a six or a seven. Something like that. A Marine is like an eight. A custodian is an 11. inquisitors are generally are generally 10

and so often like their their just loyalty is so absolute yeah well naturally to be an inquisitor I would imagine you would need to be

nearly absolutely loyal so to end this episode make the point I'm trying to state is that the inquisition is all consuming

and can do whatever the hell they want but they are not the extermination us happy fuckers that we think they are. There are some of them, but it's such a rarity.

And often they are more so just very intelligent secret police detectives kind of people. And they tend to do a pretty good job with their jobs. They tend to be very good at what they do. And because they're so good at what they do, it makes more of them. And it makes the need for them seem higher and higher. They still need to exercise some practice. Don't tell the dark angels that they're going to, you know, but yeah. You must listen to me, Dark Angel.

What's the funny picture of like Bugs Bunny? He was like, no. Nope. No. But I really like this episode because I, as soon as we said Inquisitor, I was like, okay. He's going to give me a bunch of examples of these guys just scorched earth, just, you know, slash and burn everything, exterminate on us this. torture that, behead this person, and oh, they're just the worst of the worst. And it's cool to find out

that they're not actually like that. They might not be the best people in the whole wide world, but they're just smart detectives that are just kind of doing what they need to do. So, yeah, cool. The Inquisition Part 1. And now it's time for the book club question. Ooh, book club question. Let's go. Let's go. Let's go. All right, my friend. I am giving you two choices. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Actually, no, I'll give you, I'm giving you three choices.

All right, all right, all right. You can choose between Hell's Reach. Ooh, okay. The wonderful book made by Aaron Dembski Bowden entirely discussing the Black Templars during the War of Armageddon. You can also choose the first heretic Heretic. This is one of the

Horacee books entirely about the word bearers and Lorgar as well as Argel Tal and Argel Tall Arabis and I believe Karin the Betrayer. Oh, that's a spicy

meat ball. Apparently it's very big than the word bearers and helping with the word bearers. It's also the prequel to Betrayer the World Eater's novel with Latarer. Horace are in. And lastly, you can do Blackheart of Huron Blackheart, the newest book, just released, narrated by Andrew Wincott of Nightlord's fame.

Oh, boy, that's tough. I don't think I want to do the Black Templar one yet. Not because it's not cool, not because I don't think the Black Tempers are cool, but we did get a little bit of, uh, we did a little, we did a little, We got a little war of Armageddon in Gaskell, right? That was his big... A little bit, yeah. Yeah, a little bit, so...

Oh, man, the... Let's... I want to do the first heretic. I'll be honest, I would do the first heretic. I want to do that one. I... I, yeah, yeah. The first heretic it is.

Lorgar! Lorgar! Lorgar! It's time to learn more about Lorgar. People tell me the first... Heritage makes you like Lorgar. So, oh boy. We'll see. Also, it gives us

a nice jump-off point to get into the the... What's it? What's the ship, the devourer? What's Latora's ship the cheap? Oh, oh, the conqueror. The conquer. We can get the conqueror's abs too, potentially. He's spin off of that

and go right into the conquerors' abs. I assume we're going to do the other two books at some point as well, right? What other two books are you? Oh, the other two we've mentioned? I'm sure at some point, yeah. Okay, cool, cool. There's also Eisenhorn, which is another thing.

Okay. Sweet. Well, with the end of this episode, I guess we're going to end it normally. We'll have another episode of the Inquisition on the various orders next week. And, um, yeah, I don't know. I mean, find us on social media and YouTube and shit.

I don't fucking know. Yeah, whatever. Yeah, whatever. I hate, I hate, I hate this. I hate you. I hate all of you. I hate myself. I love you guys.

Bye.