Adeptus Ridiculous - MAJOR GENESTEALER CULTS: HARBINGERS OF THE STAR GODS | Warhammer 40k Lore

Episode Date: September 21, 2022

Get 20% OFF @manscaped + Free Shipping with promo code CODE at https://www.MANSCAPED.com! #ad #manscapedpod https://www.patreon.com/AdeptusRidiculoushttps://www.adeptusridiculous.com/https://twitter.com/AdRidiculoushttps://orchideight.com/https://www.collectiblesquids.com/ code: ADRICA Genestealer Cult is a xenos-worshipping secret society made up of and controlled by Tyranid Genestealers that thrives in the dark corners of the Imperial underworld across the galaxy. Secretive, stealthy, and utterly malignant, Genestealer Cults are the cancers growing unseen in the hidden spaces of Mankind's realm.Their purpose is to rise up and take control of Imperial worlds in the name of a xenos god that is actually a Tyranid Hive Fleet. Once the world is under their control, the cultists' psychic emanations are picked up by the closest Hive Fleet's extension of the Hive Mind which is then drawn to consume the world, cultists and all.Support the show

Welcome everyone to another episode of the Adeptus Podcast. My name is D.K. Diamantis. My co-host is Bricky. We're going to be learning about some really weird Warhammer 40K stuff today. But before we do, if you enjoy today's episode, heading over to patreon.com slash Adeptus Ridiculous and consider supporting your favorite ridiculous podcast. You get access to the Discord, bloopers if they happen, the new Scola comic, which has a new chapter out. And of course, the HD posters at the $15 tier. We're really close to our goal.

We're at like 16K of 17. Check it out. Patreon.com slash Adeptus Ridiculous for all of your supporting the best podcast on Earth. I guess. Anyway, Bricky, stuff. Stuff. Hi, I'm stuff. I'm doing stuff.

Yes, merch, go to Orkinate.com. We have a new poster for sale. It's a new poster. I didn't choose to make this one. It is for sale. It is, there's 100. It's on the screen. Tell them what it is, D.K.

It's a thousand sons, femme boy. I'm going to buy the entire stock. That's enough of that. There's 100 for sale. There it is. Look in the description. There's the stuff. I'm going to play the ad we have for this episode now.

D.K. does notice as a Genecithiclercult episode, but I always wondered, right? Like, G. Geistler cults are always false. But I wonder, do they have hair elsewhere? And if they did, do they have our fantastic sponsor, Manscape? This episode is brought to you by Manscape,

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And we're back. Yes, yeah, keep laughing. I like the transition. I love that the transition into that was just, ugh. The ads. I am very respectful to all of our sponsors. However, the thing before us is a whole other world to discuss. Yeah.

Yeah, the wonderful posters, right? The posters. It's a thousand sun's poster. How can you? All is dust, my guy. What do you mean? How can I? You know why I can't, because anger and sadness.

Angron. No, no, no, no, you got that wrong. Anger. Oh, right, right, right. Angren. Oh, okay. Holy shit, fucking Lois from Family Guy. Peter.

I can't believe you've done this. Lowell, Lamow. You know, Carn the Betrayer really was a low-limau kind of guy. He sure. was. I can't believe we forgot to talk about that. That part in the beginning of the book where he goes to the ultramarine rhino and he's like, knock, knock.

Anyway, are you ready, my friend, for your cloth? I'm never really ready for this, but sure, I'm ready to look stupid and let's let it rip. All right, let it rip. Digimon. Mm-hmm. Pokeyman. Mm-hmm. Dual Masters.

Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Yes. We could unite the paupers and the scribes. The fact to... What the fuck is that word? Factotums? That's a weird one.

And the hab workers, easily enough. They too have their uses. But an uprising recruited from those with ready access to military gray weaponry, that will triumph far more easily than one recruited from the common folk. Keep your thwart. toothless herd. The blessed union of gun, claw, and merciless intent is a force to be truly feared. Brigadier, Primus, Lens van Wanderchutz. Wow. That's Wlandvlondersloop?

Wow, dude. I apologize to our German fans right now who are already cringing due to my pronunciation. Oh, well, I don't know what to tell them. Um, Boy, um, Hmm. I'm, I'm not entirely sure what this is. Uh, it sounds like they, they, they want an uprising, but they don't want an uprising of losers. Like, because at first I was like, oh, maybe this is like,

under hive stuff, you know? Because that, they could, like, uprising and they've got their little factions and, um, um, hmm, hmm. there's a part of me that almost would like to guess Gene Steeler because I know we're about to do a Gene Steeler book

so maybe you're kind of like you know priming the pump um keep pumping DK because you got it right did I read let's go yeah it's Gene Steeler Colts we are doing our classic

all the various kinds of playable cults and we are doing the overall faction overview of the believers of the star children, the worshippers of the forearmed emperor of claw and cog and blade and gun and the miners coming up. Hell, yeah, I haven't even started the book yet. It sounds amazing, though.

The Day of Ascension sounds fantastic. There's also the, there was something in the quote about claw, and I was like, well, Gene Stealers have, like, those, like, three arms that have the claws on the end of them. Yeah, you know, the Inspector Gadget villain, you know, The Claw. Dr. Claw. Oh, my bad.

Did you ever watch the live action movie? Oh, God, no. I don't think I even realized there was a live action movie. Oh, God. Back in the day when Hollywood video and Blockbuster were right next to me, we would rent the Inspector Gadget live action film. And I think it's fucking awful. But we rented that so many times as kids.

kids so many times. Oh, Shai's got the gift. Let's go. The claw. Oh, no. What is this? It's the claw. Jeez.

That looks terrible. I specifically remember a point when he extended his arm out in an attempt to meditate and he improperly did it and crushed some poor guru's balls. I remember that being a part of the film. Wow. All right. All right. In Inspector Gadgett is a ballbuster. Got it. Cool.

Yep, absolutely. This is the more important part of the Gene Steeler Colt thing. Yeah, that's Matthew Broderick's gadget too. Matthew Broderick is getting. Matthew Broderick. Like, what is going on? What happened to your career? Hey, I didn't make good decisions as a child, all right? That's fine. Look where it got me. All right. Gene Steeler Colts. The Gene Steeler Colts.

The Gene Steeler Colt. The Gene Steeler Colt. Colts. We are discussing the classic thing we normally do for those who are uninitiated from the viewers. We like to discuss nice little overviews of the main playable Colts that you can play in game because it is very fun to pick the ones. While there are some, I mean, there's plenty that are not in the game. It's fun to talk about the ones that are. So if you were ever considering getting yourself a Jeans Steelers Colt Army, you might know what you wanted to build them as just because you're like Hey, they sound really cool.

Hell yeah, let's do it. I'm ready for it. All right. I'm here for it, as they say in the business. We have a grand total of six cults this time around. We have the cult of the four-armed emperor, the hive cult, the bladed cog, the rusted claw, the pauper princes, and the twisted helix.

Let's go, twisted helix. I remember them. Let's go. Yeah, they're my personal. favorites as well, but we'll get to them eventually. So starting off, we have the cult of the four-armed emperor, which is just... That sounds really cool. Just a lovely name, right?

Just the lovely name. Also, they each every one of them have a banner of some kind, and they all look dope as shit. They just... I love the actual forearm sort of like deity on that one. Yeah. That's really, really cool. Is the Forearmed Emperor, that's a, what is it like an Overlord or something? The world would be Patriarch.

Patriarch, that's right, because that was in the, was it in the Kane book that they had to fight an overlord? Yes, the Patriarch got all confuzzled because of good old Yeorgian. Yeargin, yep, oh, Yergan. Oh, Yergan, because Yergan was a blank and stuff. So I do believe that the cult of the forearm member is your classic cult. They are the poster boy of cults, the ones that you see in the boxes a lot, kind of like ultramarines, kind of like Black Legion, et cetera, et cetera. They are your classic and most widespread cult in the galaxy.

They are all about subterranean assault. They're very cunning. They're very patient. They are your classic style of Gene Steeler cult. They are all about the uprising, and as you'll often see it is, as you'll often see with a lot of the history of these cults, they, almost every single cult is some combination of yes, Gene Steeler influence, but also hatred of the Imperium or the Imperium fucking them over in some way that it's the reason they became so widespread. Like, if the people, if the regular Imperial Citizen had a good life, these cults might not get as far as they do. Because it's not... Oh, yeah, I guess that makes sense, yeah.

Very often, the people who join these cults, all the cults, don't join because of genes through their cult influence. They join because of lots of, like, under, like, rebel reasons, you know? They want a better life. Oh, right, right. Sometimes things like, like, the Gene Steader cults utilize kidnapped. and blackmail a ton. Oh. They have assassination.

They sometimes they just like to rile things up. They like to, you know, they kidnap the daughter of like a governor and the governor freaks out. And, you know, it leads to better working conditions for other people. And then people join the cults, you know? Yeah, you know, I hadn't, when I think about the Gene Steeler cult, I hadn't thought about people like willingly joining the Gene Steeler cult

because of like rebellious reasons because like the Imperium is awful and the Imperium treats its citizenry awful and of course I want to rebel. These guys don't give a shit about me. I'm less than a speck on the map

to them so it's like of course I want to join the uprising of course I'll join the Gene Stealers. Also how often do people know that the rebellion they're joining is Gene Steeler? Like do they really realize that they're about to side with the tyranids? Never. Basically, never. Okay. Gotcha. Okay.

I was still the underhanded scheming. I was like, why would people, like, is the Imperium so bad that they'd be willing to join with the tyrannids? And it's like, oh, right, they just straight up don't know. Yeah. Almost never. I say almost, but almost never. Because, yeah, it's more of like this cult is created because I remember in the Jingsteer Club episode, we talked about the various levels of a gene. Steeler and how like some look almost just nearly perfectly human some are just slightly colored and so those are the ones that are obviously on the surface recruiting talking and

operating as spies and assassins and something um the three armed ones aren't out doing recruiting because hey what's with the third arm buddy yeah but often there's so many weird mutants in human colonies anyway like a third arm is barely even that surprising for some hive worlds. That's true. That's true because who knows what a how many of the regular citizen or even know what most of the Xenos look like? Like they know they might know that they exist but it's like they've ever seen one. Yeah, Tyrannids are some are often not that known from the general populace besides like the guard. And even then like genes to their cults don't even necessarily know much about tyrannids in general. They know that there is the great gods coming to

save them. They don't know what they are, you know? The Patriarch might be there. You know, because they get like their mind detached before they get thrown in the goop. That's right. They, they don't know either. That's true. I forgot that. Yeah. Because, yeah, like you said, once they get their minds detached as they're falling into the soup and it's like, Rutt-Roggy. Oh, Ruck you, Raggy. I don't like that. I don't like that at one bit. Oh my God, wait. You see that image that,

should I post it up top a little bit with the G-sterer cults on the tank? Just, that's the mystery mobile. But the G-Skeeler cult mystery-mobile. And it's like, R-Rot-Row-Raggy. The Imperium is being a bunch of rocking idiots. Like Zoing Scoob!

Yep. Like Zoing Scoob, that's the Four-Hump. Or, that's the Emperor. Anywho. That's the fan-art idea for everybody. is we need 40K Scooby-Doo crossover.

I want like a genius to their cult like and they're all all the people are just dudes with like the bag over their head

and let's see who you really are. All right. Anywho so the cult of the forum emperor, again the most widespread. I believe they were the first

to be found that I'm like 60% sure on that one. They were the first ones to ever be found by the Imperium. So an inquisitor was like,

hmm, There's something fucky-wucky going on over there And then decided to go and take a squad of tempestus Sions into the world And they went to the largest mining colony there known as the great pit And they were not Or in them Their inquisitor friends were like hey, how's it going down there? And they said, oh

Shit seems fine They're actually quite loyal to the emperor. Huh, I guess that was wrong And then they never heard from them again for a year. Oh. And then they're like, okay, that's weird. And then the Inquisitors

kind of combed through their message a bit more and it's like, this, this doesn't sound like they typed it. This, this doesn't look quite like they're, okay, all right.

So then they've sent a kill team of five Death Watch Space Marines down in there to investigate. Ooh, hoo-hoo. And you know, that is a kill team. Yeah, they're going.

They're going for it. And they never came back. Oh wow The Death Watch kill team got wrecked by the Gene Steeler Colt Well I guess there's probably A ton of Gene Steeler Cult like You know Yeah you're basically

They're five Death Watch against like What hundreds of thousands of Gene Steeler Cult like Good luck You're basically fighting a Hive City Billions You know like even they can't deal with them So eventually I was like alright screw this So they took a Death Watch chaplain

It's a guy named Orton Cassius of the Ultramarines, Ultramarines, but turned Death Watch, of course. And he picked his own hand-picked team of Death Watch down there. And when they got in there, yep, they were like, oh, my God, these are all mutants, they're all horrifying. There's layer upon layer upon layer of these crazy purple people. They've got extra arms and they're using mining drills and lasers and bombs that against us. they never found the Inquisitive

but they did find his servo school to learn some more info and stuff and what they found out overall is that this world is this place called the Trist Dynasty and the Trist or Trist or Trist or Trice I don't quite know but after they were able to escape Cassius became this like obsessed

Tyrannid crazed madman like he's like oh my God the Tyrannus the Tyridus the tyrants oh my God they kind of figure out what they've done because what's turned out is that they the entire world this trice dynasty trist dynasty was an industrial workforce but their industrial workforce people like they're miners they're their slaves etc were really good at their job like they they were full stop extremely competent workers

the most competent because they're gene stealer infected and they can be good at their stuff and not care. And so the various systems around them were like, damn, we need more of these guys. So they would export their workers to other areas and have them show off and be like, yeah, you know, listen to these guys. Like, yeah, listen to us.

And then more and more and more and more. And now... That's one way to spread a couple. Colt, that's one way to spread the gene-stealer virus, sure, yeah. And now that forearm-depper cult is everywhere. Massive. It's all over the place. Damn. If there's anything that a regular planetary governor wants,

if there's anything that, like, just the Hive City wants, it's really good miners, workers, and slaves that don't question anything that are quiet, everything like that. So. Yep. That sounds about right in 40K, sure. Yeah. So they're everywhere.

They're just everywhere. They're all over the place. And they're really good at their classic, like, industrial weapons and coming from the ground and that kind of stuff. They're your most classic type. So when the, so the one chaplain actually survives this planet, right? And he can actually get out and he becomes obsessed with the tyrannids, right? Yeah. Yeah, is there a reason

that it's just virus bomb the fuck out of this planet? Because he would come back and he's like, yep, it's infected. It is just billions of these Zeno scumbag blood-sucking sons of bitches. Let's just virus bomb exterminate on us the shit out of it. There's most likely a good chance that the reason he didn't is something to do

with, my guess, is the sheer volume of resources that the Imperium wants from that planet? Uh, I mean, sure, but it seems like it's so infected that there's just no chance. And it's like one of those times when it's like, let's succumb the resources, because we've pretty much lost them and, like, cripple the Gene Steeler cult, right? Well, yeah, you can't cripple the Gene Steer cult. They've already spread their influence to super, like a huge amount of other systems. Oh, true.

But that seems like it's kind of their main hub, right? Where they're sort of, well, I guess, yeah. Well, maybe not. How long has it been here is the real question? Also, they're having a bit of a hard time communicating through other people anyway because of the fall of Kadia and the break of the rift. Oh, fair, yeah. Yeah, that's kind of added a bit more of a difficulty in order to get the reinforcements they're looking for.

Oh, so the Gene Steader cult doesn't come around until after the fall of Kadia? Well, this one has a... This one is aware of it after the Falkadia, so speak. At least this one. Yeah, I guess I didn't realize the timeline of the Gene Steeler Colts. Yeah, and also, yeah, just like... I'm pretty sure there's some admec dudes like, hey, don't destroy this. We need this stuff.

Okay. But this is the classic, you know, Colts of Forearmed Emperor. They do their subter... Like, their abilities are subterranean ambushers. They have Their relic It's called the sword Of the forearmed emperor

Which is kind of fun Warlord's tray Is inscrutable cunning Their stratum Has one of my favorite names In at all 40K Which is a plan Generations in the making

Which is just So Gene Staler cult Yeah It's just so fun to listen to You know I don't know What is that picture? Shai just posted

Is that like the Is that like the statue of the emperor That they pray to The Forearmed Emperor the Patriarch? Yeah, I believe so. That's so cool.

It's a very, good, very cool looking bit of image because, yeah, forearm emperor, as you can see, it's got a big four arms, but as you see, it's like, subterranean tunnels that they're building underneath all the craziness.

It's cool. Do you have a picture of the Patriarch, by the by? Yeah, the Patriarch is, oh, I looked up the Patriarch. like slimy and disgusting and they don't look like that do they uh well that's a very regal looking thing but no yeah a patriarch looks very similar to something called a brood lord in the tabletop oh yeah yeah yeah yeah okay they have a they have a they're not this regal thing that the guys are praying to oh god no god no yeah they're much more savage and brutal yeah okay yeah cool

they look like more like a brood lord kind of thing. The second colt we have is known as the Hive Colt. The Hive Colt is what you would imagine if you take a Gene Steeler cult and you make them very militaristic. You are

you are looking for your army style guys. So they're arm, dangerous, very hierarchical. They tend to infiltrate hive world gangs and astramitarum regiments first and foremost.

They have this concept that every rebel should have a sword, a gun, and if possible, a tank. Not actually, but armed and dangerous. A blade in the hand is worth two during the rebellion, you know? Yeah, so this is probably where the quote at the beginning of the episode came from, right? Exactly. It's from a hive, yeah. They also have this fun little talisman they carry around, which is the actual emblem. of the cult

but they also carry it around as a genuine talisman and it operates as an extra blade to just have you know because it's like a little sawed blade yeah that looks very sharp you could absolutely use that as a as like a little dagger or a hand-to-hand combat weapon sure

and as you can see here there is a very very hefty amount of astromalitaram looking stuff in their flag oh fuck I love their flag that one looks really cool Oh, cool. Like the actual, like, a flag looks great with the purple, black, and gold.

And then, um, whatever the flagstaff is made out of, I don't know what that, like, angel-looking head thing is, but that's dope. Hell, yeah, I would love to be a flag bear in, in that hive. They also, even in game, can take small sections of Imperial Guard for their,

well, I think Geniusesau Colts can do that in general, but they are able to take like, hey, you had Imperial Guard stuff, you can use Imperial Guard stuff for a small contingent of your army because the Hive Colt. The Hive Col are militaristic, you know? Oh, that's cool. That's a cool little add-on to the tabletop. Yeah, you can use guard stuff because, duh, you're a hive.

You'd be able to. Yeah. The original one that started this was way back in a Hive City, There was like 12 different hive gangs on this giant hive city. And 11 of them have been taken over. But it started off as a war because they had some guy who called himself the Xeno czar, who just thought he was some fancy prick. And he liked to buy illegal Zeno specimens.

And he decided to buy what a jean stealer, which of course he doesn't know what a gene stealer is. Of course nobody at that time does. And use it as a tool to fight the other. their gangs. Oh. Because he's a dummy. Yeah. The Zeno Tsar.

I hate that so much. Yeah. He's a rich. He's a real shitter. They call him the first father, the gene stealer. And that cool, instead of going with their classic style of assassination and blackmail and kidnapping, they just killed them. They just decided to slaughter the gangs and kill their higher arcs.

They had an amygos, which is like a psycher, like a special jeans to their psycher. And it started just killing anyone it couldn't control psychically and carving the blade of the cog symbol into their dead body as like a calling card. Oh, fun. Very. Yeah. So they're just, no formalities here. If I can control you, you're coming to my side.

If I can't rip. literally rip yeah literally rip yeah so yeah yeesh no no fooling around here their primary export is like usual

oh yeah that's a megos right there they're often they're often feminine their model is also feminine their model is I don't know I don't know about this

about this Mr. Mr. James Workshop but Their mall's got some wide-ass hips, and I don't know why they're doing that. Why not? Hips don't lie, dude.

Yeah, but they made it for the Gene Steeler calls. Well, you know. Look at that head. Look that scrotum-ass-looking head. How else are you going to properly recruit people without, you know, some, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know what I mean? Look at the guy to the right on that image. She's like, please, please, please, mistress, one single foot.

I was about saying He looks like the guy's like please step on me We'll pay We'll pay with soul Please step on We'll pay with Tiran and soul Yeah So the

We're so stupid Oh my God The The hive colts number one export is Naturally Military and Guardsmen I think you're going to say Mago's feet

Was not number one export Military and guardsmen They're very They're very big on fighting and guardsmen stuff, and so often they'll fight alongside the sororitis or sometimes other guard regiments, and then out of nowhere you catch a rock saw in the back of the head. Or your Lehman Rus tank's turret just turns around

and fires at the Space Marine. Oh, that's unfortunate. Yeah, that's, oh, man. Is there no way to pick them out? Like, if you're in the guard, is there any way to, like, suss out? a jean stealer or is just like See who's the imposter? Yeah, is there any way to see if they vented?

You're holding an emergency meeting. You're not doing your task, you're just standing there. Any way to do that with the jean steeler cult? Normally, if you ever want to, as you say, suss out somebody, the number one best way is a psyker. But you don't know. You don't trust imperial psychers, for one, because the crazy guard ones.

And two, then you would need like an inquisitor and they're not around a whole lot. Or like a space marine librarian and they're definitely not around a whole lot. Yeah. So if the Gene Steeler Cult infiltrates your regiment, you're by and large just kind of screwed because eventually they will turn on you

and eventually you will get wrecked. I mean, when you think about it, like sure, Gene Steer Cult has the stuff have some psychic ability and maybe some telepathy thing here and there depending on the person like the megos but this is still a cult it's still a rebellion still an uprising so there's a good time like that you might just not even figure like like you might figure them out because they're whispering secrets to one another like they might realize that they're that kind of thing but let's also remember that they don't really know that genes their cults are a thing

often because these are the normal looking ones sometimes. So yeah yeah. Yeah at best they might consider them rebels which is still worthy of death for the Imperium. Sure, sure. But yeah I guess how many

people in the Imperium really even know what a gene stealer is? Like you're right they're just going to think it's like oh this is just a rebellion this is just you know some unhappy people that are going against the Imperium. They don't even know it's Zenos. They barely see the Zenos so yeah. And, you know, in game of their stuff is like discipline militants, fire discipline, you know, like different talismans that are very good at making, at saving them from, or actually, this one's kind of weird.

Hold on. Volcar's talisman. This talisman drives the wielder to acts of great bloodsham. It is said to contain the departed spirit of Voktor Mai, known as the White Creeper. Insert, Minecraft song. The scourge of New Guilden's aristocracy, which is actually the white creeper I do believe is a sanctist, like an assassin,

that it was like the knight-hunter kind of thing in the night. When Vaukemei's charismatic allure proved ineffective against the hive lord thorn due to a protective artifact, Mai crept into the man's bathhouse and slashed his throat with the razor edge of this metallic worm form. In the legends of the hive cult,

the talisman harbors some of that malevolent and murderous intent to this day. So, okay, I was slightly wrong. When the Magos couldn't do the mine stuff, they instead used the assassin known as a Sanctus, who was this guy, and then he was the one who carved the symbol. Oh, the symbol, yeah.

The white creeper. So it's like a little talisman you can keep for your character, and it makes them really good at savvy. Just stuff like that. Good for them. Also, it's, I've realized that the Imperium's desire to not make Zenos known to the general populace and not let them really understand them,

that really works to the benefit of a lot of Zenos, that, like, the major populace just don't know about the nids, they don't know about the orcs, they don't know about the Eldar, and they can do all this shady shit, and everybody's just like, oh, that's just a rebellion, or, oh, that's not a Zenos threat that we need to worry about or tell people to worry about, whatever.

It's like, the Imperium has kept, their citizenry in such like ignorance that like she knows can infiltrate sure sounds a lot like that emperor dude didn't tell his sons about chaos hmm it sure does doesn't it it's almost like they keep making the same mistake almost um try to question history repeating itself try to question do you make an all tank gene stealer army meta wise uh i believe that the gene steeler cults can have up to either 500 or 750 of their

2,000 points can be guard can be Imperial Guard and there's a thing where when you play a faction you get buffs to your faction but you get a mega buff if you're only that faction like Sisters of Battle get miracle dice

for example if they're only sisters of battle which is really important Admec get like certain kinds of can'ts like binary stuff. So I think in order to keep the genes to the general ability with something that was crossfire which is kind of fun.

It's like if you hits an enemy enough times you get a crossfire marker on them which means they're like they're kind of your other guys can hit them but the most fun one is if your guys, if you've got dudes on one side and the other and you can draw a line

between them it's like you're attacking them from both directions which makes them expose which gives you like extra wounding damage to them. So it's like, hey, if you're popping your guys up in all different directions and you're surrounding your enemy, they become a lot weaker because you're preparing to hit them with all your damage. It's got a fun.

Hell yeah. Yeah. And they also get these sick-ass bikes. Oh, damn. Those are sick. Yeah, they're very mad maxi. Oh, though, I mean, Tribe, if you're asking, can you make like a bunch of jeans to their cult tank stuff?

Oh, totally. They run, they run Ridge Runners and Atlin Jackals all the time. Very heavily sometimes. but you can't do like full guard tank army you know that's a different thing can you imagine how dope it would be if you were one of the three-armed

jean steeler cults and you rode on a bike you'd have that one arm free to shoot people and not lose any maneuverability on the bike by taking a hand off to shoot someone yeah it'd be uh it'd be pretty pretty dope so if you were like uh if you were a patriarch

you had two free arms you could pump a shotgun while you were still dirt that damn Yeah, you got to do the Terminator thing. I have like the lever action shoddy on the bike. Hell yeah. So the next one we have is the cult of the bladed cog. The bladed cog is exactly what you might assume. It is ad mech.

And they also have a super dope looking banner as well. Oh, that is so ad mech. Oh, my God. The bladed cog... That's so cool. Oh, God. They're all about the combination of Zenos, flesh, and metal. They are a weird hybrid of humans, metal, and tyrannid biomass all combined the one.

So what originally... It's spooky. Originally, Admec took over a sector and for energy requirements, and it was way less than they would have liked. and because they're ad mech and they could care less about human people, they just worked the populace to the fucking bone. Just completely crushed them underfoot. And the populace actually revolt him before Gene Steeler-Coles became a thing. And the ad meck didn't like that, obviously,

but didn't want to kill too many because they wanted to keep their energy supplies up. So they tried to kill as few as they could and either lobotomize or adjust the breast. eventually a freighter arrived with a gene stealer in it and the people willingly looked at the gene stealer and said there has to be something better than being under the ad mech there's got to be something better oh and and so they looked at the gene stealer cults and we're like oh they would be they might be less tyrannical about so so these guys guys were like, wow, it sure does suck to be under the ad mech. Boy, this is awful.

They're trash. We are dying. It's got to be. Gene Steeler cult couldn't be any worse. They said, look at this Gene Steeler. There are obviously beings outside the Imperium and maybe they're better than being under the ad mech, which is not true. They're probably right.

Well, no, because then they turn into soup. But, at the end of the day. Oh, yeah, they do eventually turn into soup. Yeah, but they probably live longer. Yeah. And in blissful ignorance of what's going to happen to them. Well, isn't that a question we have? How blissful is their ignorance?

Because their mind gets pulled from the genus dealer cult's hive mind at the end. There's always that question of like, are they actually, are they actually in there? Are they actually in there, like screaming out, try? Like, no, no, no, but they don't. I don't know if that's a thing or not. But regardless, yeah, they're all about this horrifying combo of Xenos flesh and metal. Their psycher magus has like their skin crawling with metal organisms that just, it's like a psychic field of just eating metal around them.

Whoa. The cult worships the hive mind as a deity known as the Claude Omnisiah, propagating that the machine cult is misleading with their mantra that the flesh is weak. The clot Omnisai is a great name. Also, can Gene Steeleer cult infect the Admec? They can. Admec are not fully mechanical. They have some biological, and not only that, but Gene Steeleer Colts have a lot of psychers,

and, you know, they have a mind in there still. That's true. They do have a mind in there, so. I wasn't sure, like, how exactly the Gene Steeler virus worked. in terms of like corrupting and turning I think we covered that we covered that a little bit didn't we like the genes do their kiss and then it like affects

your biological stuff it has been a minute right well then I wasn't sure if it worked the same on the on the ad mec as it did on like a normal hume it probably doesn't fucking orc people hume um it probably it probably doesn't

but it probably also has some kind of like it has some level of a variance but regardless is still worked out for them at the end their abilities in game xenoform bionics cyborgized hybrids

brood volts oh yeah every geese circle has special psychic power too they have one called brood volt surge kind of fun you know things like that yeah hell yeah they sound cool the next one we have is the rusted claw these are the ones that are probably

the easiest to describe and the simplest. We're talking nihilism, man. Like, Nietzsche ain't got shit on this. Nietzsche ain't got shit on this. He doesn't know nothing. They are all about... Also, here's their banner because the banner. Oh, very cool banner.

Very cool. Probably not the coolest one we've seen, but damn, you're right. All their banners are so slick. They are really slick. The idea of the rusted claws, they are full on nihilism and nomads. You're looking at your more feral style of group.

They believe that the material goods are unimportant, so much to the point where neither are their bodies, as they are just vessels to the aliens that they worship, that they are just, their bodies are just part of the great plan of the star gods. that owning owning possessions is dumb and for dumb dumb, dumb heads. Okay, okay, okay.

They're very nomadic, they're very tribal, they're constantly on the move. They, and in fact, because of that, they're extremely rugged. Like, they can go genuine weeks without food or water. Holy shit. Weeks.

They work under heavy radiation or like blazing suns. They can, take bullets and just keep on moving. Just keep walking. Wow. Okay. Mm-hmm.

So they're, they would be very hard to stamp out. Like, if the Imperium was like, oh yeah, we need to get rid of these nomad gene stealers, it would be like impossible. The idea. Because once they dig in, it's like impossible.

Like, they can go weeks without food and what? You can't even starve them out. The idea in game is that these are the tough and fast ones. they're really tough to deal with and because they're so nomadic they move quick so absolutely yeah

I would want these guys in a fight like if I was going into a fight and I was like oh which jeans should I pick I'd probably pick these guys yeah it kind of makes sense with their uprising too because where they started they had a planet where the populace worked entirely underground

and those above the surface didn't give them an ounce a crumb a penny a penny sliver no money and they eventually dug into a crashed voyage ship and awoke the gene stealer with him. But the cult goes really hard into that lack of material possessions. And therefore, anyone who does go hard into it tends to suffer a very bad fate.

Hence, the higher-ups of their planet. Hell, their points even, their name, Rusted Claw is a genuine statement. They don't maintain their vehicles or their armor or their guns because why bother. Material possession, right, yeah. So their weapons are really rusty. And like, look at their symbol. It's all cracked and rusted up. Brok it up, yeah.

They're actually really cool. I like the rusted claw. Their appearance is like, they don't keep up with their appearance at all. They don't wash or bathe that they're like, their skin is leathery and degraded and stuff. they're very like guerrilla fighting because they just there's no point you know they are just servants to the god damn so in game they're very much like nomadic survivalists they're they have an ability where they can make enemy vehicles and stuff like decay a little bit faster with their psychic powers so that they've become stronger they love their they love their bikes huge on the bikes nice nice very cool

big fan of bikes they can like advance and shoot without penalty things like like that. Very, very quick and very tough. Can you imagine what they must smell like? Man, they must be absolutely ripe. Like, oh. They, yeah. Especially jean stealers.

Yeah, jean steers probably already are a little on the gang side. But man, the ones that don't shower to the point where their skin has turned leathery, it's like, oh no. There are some weirdos. I don't much like them in game a whole. a lot, they're all right, but they are, they're fun, they're funny. Yes. So, the next one we have is one that I actually started to really appreciate.

These are the Popper Princes. I think they have my favorite banner of them all. Oh yeah, they got like a little guy up there that has a half, hammer, half scythe, pickax thing? What is that? It's like a, I think it's an industrial like rock hammer that has a little pick at the bottom of it, like a pick on the bottom and the hammer on the top. Very cool color combo too. Yeah, I like the purple and the orange lot. I really like the pauper princes.

I don't like them. I mean, Twisted helix are my favorite, but I think they're actually kind of fun. The Twisted or the Power Princes are religious and fanatical. They believe in their like more, more so than the others. they fully believe in their gods of the known as the star children okay the star children and are the obviously the fucking tyrantids um but they no yeah i know i know but just to make clear um they revere their own prophets and living saints and they are extraordinarily selfless they are constantly putting themselves in harm's way for the protection of their masters

And this is not like an enforced requirement. This is an inspired requirement. They are, they do not, they are not asked to have this level of devotion and selflessness. They just, they just do it. Oh, wouldn't expect that from Gene Steeler Colts, honestly. Wouldn't expect that sort of devotion and selflessness, even like to their own cause, because it's just, you know, they're gene stealers. Like, kind of expect them to just be kind of ravenous and maybe not ravenous,

but you don't expect self-lessness from the genealysis. to have a cult. Well, actually, that's kind of part of their whole schick is people sacrificing themselves for the greater, the greater being, so to speak. It's actually kind of a part of it. Yeah. On the image I posted, it says the Popper Princes, from Great Sacrifice comes immortality. Mm-hmm.

Very, very zealotous. They have one of the more, they have one of the more fun planets, though. They were on this planet called Chancer's Vale, V-A-L-E-E-E-E-E-L-E. and they actually are a coastal city on this great vast breadth of water they use it to mine the resources in the water like saline cubes and things like that but they live in these horrible horrible like favela shanty towns on the coast so these awful look i always think about like the brazil favela shanty towns on the coast so these these awful look i always think about like the the brazil kind of the ones that have the sheet metal shacks and stuff. Yeah, and they're just rose and rows and rows of them. I always think of that, but like on the coastal sand. And apparently it was so, like, awful that their abject poverty were some of the worst possible

that they didn't even need to be coerced by gene stealers to join the cult. They did it anyway as a way to try to get off the planet. Oh, wow. Like, they didn't need to be messed by Tyrannids. They joined willingly because they said, like, anything is better. Get me off this goddamn planet. It's so, I can barely eat every day. In fact, I can barely survive.

I can never have kids because I won't have enough food to feed them. Like, get me the fuck out of here. Yeah, like for them, like, even if it's like, oh, yeah, even if they were told that at the end of this, we're going to release your brain and send you into the soup, they'd probably still go too. Like, even if they knew the consequences, because it's like, well, I'm probably going to die in here

in abject poverty in the next month or the next year. At least if I'm with a Gene Steeler cult, I might go into the soup, but it's probably going to be like, you know, 60, 70 years down the line when I'm old and useless, so fuck it. Naturally, um, The piercedain gene stealer made its lair on like a barge they had.

It just like, they were already there. It was easy pickens. The interesting thing is that the, they eventually create these kind of demagogues. They had an Magos called Ten Dark, which was kind of their preacher, so to say, in this area of awful, awful abject poverty. And with, they would kind of preach and get more and more followers. And eventually a rattling, a little astramarraltarum ratling took a sniper shot at their leader. And one of their abhumans, or at their patriarch, actually, the big one. And Tendark, the Magus, I guess whatever, dived in front of the patriarch to take the bullet and died from it.

And so very quickly afterwards, that rattling was ripped to shreds because, of course, Yeah, I bet he was. That was probably a horrible death for him. But that was kind of their like unthinking obedience is that whenever a brood mind or a higher level person is under threat, they will just jump in the way of the bullets instantly because self-sacrifice comes immortality. And another way off this godforsaken planet. Yeah, I was going to say, like if anybody would have that self-sacrifice, it would be the people that came from nothing and were at least given something.

It's interesting to think of how many Gene Steeler cults probably started and were like bolstered by the fact that the Imperium is so shit and doesn't take care of so many of their people. And there's so many people that are just like, wow, my life is awful, terrible, and disgusting. Gene Steeler cult? Sure. It's almost kind of sad because like it's obviously 40K is so grim. dark that you have to have these uprisers eventually succumb to the awful tiered nid hive minds. Yeah.

But at the same time, to kind of justify in what they're doing, I always feel like kind of silly. Like the impregum is so awful. You can finally play as the as the uprisers to the point where you even start to think, are the nids that bad? Like, yeah, they are. They take over your mind and you don't have any control over anything or, you know, they're, you're not you anymore

you're not anything anymore but you start to question yourself you're like god is it really that worse if the tyranids didn't throw them into the soup at the end of their usefulness it'd be like well I don't think it is that bad

like even if you do get taken over by a tyrannid life's for a lot of these people life is probably a lot better even with just a tyrannid controlling you and if you don't get thrown into the soup at the end, it's like, well, fuck. Beats the Imperium?

I forgot that these were the ones, too. Shia has it here. The Papa Princes were eventually able to escape the Chancellor's veil, thanks to the Super Barge just strength, infiltrating the vessel. The cultists under Tenark were able to spread their message across the galaxy, and eventually these guys made their way to Terra and had the unthinkable war against the custodays under the Imperial Palace. Wow, they actually got. got to the custodies?

They did. There's some on Terra. Damn, they made it to Terra and they got... So they were real close to actually getting the Emperor. If they made it all the way to the custodies, right? This is a relatively recent thing going on. But they had a box set actually where they sold, because it was custodias and Geno Circle at the same time.

Here is the box art for that set. Let me click the link. because it's not... Oh, wow. Oh, oh, wow. Yeah, it's a... Yeah, I know epic embed fail. I'm sorry, please.

Yeah, that was an embed failure, but damn. Also, those custodies are so licing through them. Like, there's like, what, four custodies you can see on there? And is that just piles of, like, Gene Steeler Cult bodies that they're waiting through? Yeah, look at the custodian behind him.

He's got two dudes climbing on his shoulders. Yeah, and he's missing an arm. Is he? I don't think he's missing an arm. I think that's this wrist-mounted gun. I think you can see some shots coming out of it. Oh, oh, you're right. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

It looked like there were entrails coming out of it. I guess that's just this cape or something. Or it's the guts of the guy hanging onto his shoulder. Maybe. Regardless, yeah. I mean, obviously one custodian versus a thousand G. There's your fair fight. But there's a whole lot more than a thousand.

Damn. So, I mean, obviously they don't beat the custodians, right? The custodians drive them back and blah, blah, blah, blah, because obviously they don't make it to the emperor. And it's the custodians. Yeah. But they, the war is still, yeah, apparently currently ongoing. Oh, it's still happening.

Even in current, like, there's still jeans to-other just flooding in there? That, that, um, that fucking, fight was like that box set came out like a year ago maybe less than that so yeah it's still ongoing oh okay cool damn but the a gene stealer infiltrate a custodian uh custodian's genetic alchemy is really good i'm gonna go with no okay uh i was gonna say there's a lot of gene stealers in there and not as many custodians so if they could somehow get their way into their armor that's one thing but if they could do, like, their body? I don't think so.

Okay. That'd be quite the, that'd be quite the wicked combo of a Gene Steeler custodian lying in weight next to the emperor. I think, I think the,

yeah, they said they can affect space marines, but the Marines hear the call the hive mine but can resist it for a pretty long time. And by then, they're probably like, brothers, I've got a problem, please help. Yeah, and then they get a bolter to the face. Yeah. Last but not least for the Popper. Oh, wait. No, actually, I miss some.

The actual gameplay of the Popper Princes, they have the creed is called like devoted zealots. They have a great stratagem called Vengeance for the Martyrd, where if one of your characters dies, you get benefits on whatever killed it for the rest of the battle. Oh, nice. Pretty fun stuff there, you know. They have an ability called Xenop Prophet,

which is just, there's an ability that Gene Storcles have called unquestioning loyalty, where you can just kill off one of your, dudes on a four up for taking a bullet. It lets them no longer need a four up, but just get it automatically because lollamow jump in the front of the gun. Last but not least, we have the twisted helix. Yo, let's go, twisted helix!

Let's go. Our boys! Quote, this is all perfectly normal. Your credit is good enough this time. Simply ingest the contents of one of the purple vials at dusk and one of the white vials at dawn. We guarantee you that within a week, you will feel like a new man. Oh my God.

They're so evil. Wink, wink, wink, nudge. Oh, yeah, sure, don't worry. Your credit's great here. Just take the vial. You're good to go. Wink, wink, wink. It's a shame that their banners is probably the most boring one, actually.

Oh, I like it. I love the vials on the left and stuff. It's nice, but the other ones have so much. True. This one's a little bit more gross. Oh, yeah. So the twisted helix are a fun one. I think it's interesting because we talked a little bit about them before, but the way they do it is they corrupt medicine. Yep.

And then they ship the medicine in medicine packs or food or different kinds of like dietary stuff and they ship it to other systems. Infecting people. The medicine packs and the healing supplies. are given to like guard regiments and then those are screwed up. But the interesting thing is not about that, which we already talked a bit about

in the first gene-stircle episode, but the interesting thing is how it originally happened. So, the twisted helix were already a decent amount of biophages and, uh, and megos biologists with a bunch of mad geniuses. Craze Frankenstein,

Dr. Frankenstein looking dudes, questing for the perfect, life form. So this is a whole planet, a whole system of medical mad doctors already before the gene stealer cults. Oh boy. And what happened is the pure tyrannid came face to face with one of the mad scientist. And his narcotic mind was so, because he was already ingesting so much shit, was dulled to the psychic ability of the gene stealer. And so the gene stealer's aura didn't work on him. And so on instinct, the guy slammed the airlock shut and caught him in the airlock and it was stuck in there. And he went around and looked through the glass into the airlock and stared at the jean stealer.

And the jean steeler kind of just stared at him back. And he was like, huh, how interesting. So they tried to kill it. They decided to bat bat bat bathe it in radiation, poison gas, sonic the stable. acid and nothing worked because tier did, you know? Of course, yeah. So they decided to resort to a hail of bullets, and they shot the shit out of it.

That always works. It did. It killed it. And then, because of that, they were like, we're going to dissect it. Yeah, as crazy scientists, mad scientists would do, sure, sure. And they dissected it, and over tons of experience, experiments, they decided they were able to find a way to create and assist them in their

way for their perfect life form, for their biological perfection and perhaps even immortality if they just created a serum, created a thing out of this life form. Oh, boy. And they did. Oh. And guess what happened? Oh, I'm guessing that's how they became the twisted helix? because it just, they made the serum.

Essentially they made a gene-stealer virus and just gulp. Yep. And here we are. Oh, so they're actually the ones that made the gene-stealer virus? Like, it was because they were tinkering around with this tyrannid gene-stealer that, like, they're the ones that actually invented the gene-stealer virus? No, the gene-stealer virus comes from the gene-stealer kiss, which is when the gene-stealer pulls you with your mind.

mind and then and then like... Right, but they made it into like a serum. They, they infected themselves unwillingly, but, but... Okay, got you. Intentionally as well in order to make themselves better and more powerful, but in reality, all they did was affect themselves. For some reason, I thought you were trying to be like, oh yeah, they invented the gene Steeler virus and I was like, wait a minute, what?

No, no, no, they created a virus for themselves. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, wow. So their cult ability is like experimental. subjects. They have bio-alchemists, monstrous, bio-horrors, etc. I think they have the strongest in-game ability. They have an extra inch to their movement and an extra strength to their attacks,

which makes them being faster and hitting harder is always good. They also make it so you can never wound them on a two. Normally, if you have double the strength, like if you're toughness four and they have strength eight, they can wound you on a two. But they make it so you can only go three or higher because they're tougher. Oh, yeah, yeah. Experiments. They have the ability to, like, make some of their,

they have prime, like, the elixir of the prime specimen and all that kind of stuff. They're really fun. I like them a lot. That's a cool name. And they're so devious. Like, they're, oh, that you're infecting medical supplies and, like, food for the needy is just like, oh, that's so deviously cruel. You can't help but respect it.

Like, I. God, they're so dope. Yeah. They're really, really fun. I love their, I love their style. I love their, I love their concept. They're probably the best in the game, I'd say. I say they're probably number one.

Oh, really? Yeah, I said, unless you can make your own, which is like the custom creation of them, which is really fun, which is like you have four points total, and you can build your own guy with four points. so you can use two one point buffs and one two point buff or four ones or three in a one or two twos you know that kind of stuff

those are really fun but then you lose out on like the second power and stuff and those are always fun so do do the jean steeler cults ever mix like I know in game you probably wouldn't mix them because it probably wouldn't make a whole lot of sense but like would the twisted helix ever like join up with a hive or something and would they ever like coexist for a common goal? A hive, a hive what?

Well, like, would the twisted helix ever join up with like the, the jeans to the cult that only use guard stuff? Oh, like a hive cult? Yeah, yeah, like a hive cult. Yeah, I mean, I'm assuming that they have the same end goal overall. I know that we've had those issues where sometimes tiered hive fleets may not necessarily work together a lot but even though they still aren't multiple types

of tiered high fleets. I'm not 100% sure. I'm assuming that they probably would. I mean, you can obviously ally them in game, but they also have their own style and goals. And I'm pretty sure the hive cult we're talking earlier about like, we don't want those regular ass pansies.

We want the strong type. So. True. But like, would the rusted claw ever go with the hive cult? Like, do they ever have a reason to coexist? I guess not. I mean, I'm sure they do. They have the same in goal as a tiered hive mind at the end,

but they're also high, various hive splinter fleets. So my mind says they are of the same faction with the same goal. So yes, but I can't think of any situation at the current moment on top of my head where they have. I'm sure. Did you do that in game? Is that something you would? ever consider in game? In a competitive environment, you can't run more than one.

Oh, okay. You can, but you lose your single-faction bonus thing. Yeah, you lose the big bonus, yeah. But in the sense of, just in a general game, like if you want to run a combination of one plus two, then yeah, you know. Run like bladed, bladed cog. I mean, sure, you could. Like, bladed cog combined with, say,

forearmed emperor, because you want to do like this combination of on the sire and like subterranean omnisaya mechanical stuff. It could be fine. Okay. All right. All right. Cool. There are always options or possibilities.

Yeah, because there's a lot of these factions are so cool that it's like, oh, man, how do I pick just one? Oh, I mean, you pick one because you pick twisted helix, my dude. I know, right? Let's go. The rusted claws sound really cool. I ended up really liking the rusted claw. Something about them.

Really? They're nomadic. Their nomadic survivability. they're quick moving and just like the sort of like rusted aesthetic is just,

it's really dope. I still like Twisted Helix the best, but like, you know, I'm like, oh man, Rustic Glock kind of dope.

That's actually interesting. I didn't, I think the Rustic Claude is my least favorite. I find, I find the grimy, underbelly kind of people to be just a little bit less interesting. That's true.

You already like that in real life, so why do you need that in fantasy, right? All right. All right. All right. All right. I was about to find a way to end the episode now, but you gave me the perfect one.

I'm rage quitting a dub, just ridiculous. Should I find a new co-host?