Adeptus Ridiculous - NACHMUND WAR: THE HERALD OF THE APOCALYPSE | Warhammer 40k Lore

Episode Date: August 14, 2024

https://www.patreon.com/AdeptusRidiculoushttps://www.adeptusridiculous.com/https://twitter.com/AdRidiculoushttps://orchideight.com/collections/adeptus-ridiculousThe Nachmund Rift War is an ongoing conflict being waged by the Imperium in the Nachmund Sub-Sector.Closely connected to the War of Beasts and War of Nightmares on Vigilus, while the Fortress World itself continues to remain largely in Imperial hands the greater Nachmund Gauntlet finds itself besieged by the Forces of Chaos.At Sangua Terra, the Imperials sought to organize a defensive network collectively known as the Sanctus Wall. This consisted of systems that had previously served as Indomitus Crusade supply hubs which were quickly fortified in their own right. However, the stalemate would soon be broken, must to the shock of both sides. Abaddon’s trusted lieutenant Haarken Worldclaimer arrived with a Black Legion army.Lord Admiral Prisca’s force soon arrived at the Grakiliod Narrow, a location that Haarken’s fleet could not bypass. Despite heavy losses, Prisca’s fleet maintained enough momentum to break through Worldclaimer’s formation and burst through it on the other side. As the ships broke through, they peeled off left and right, unleashing waves of attack craft as they attacked the rear of the Chaos fleet as it was changing position. After many hours of fighting, Haarken had reorganized his fleet in a jaw-like formation ready to close on the Imperials. With his final order, hundreds of ships bore down on the Imperial armada. The exhausted loyalist Space Marines onboard stood little chance and were overwhelmed. Despite a brave final stand, the Imperial fleet was eventually annihilated.Only a fraction of the Imperial fleet survived the battle to limp back to the Sanctus Wall. Prisca herself was thought dead, and her plan had achieved questionable results. The Imperial commanders at the Sanctus Wall were disturbed by reports of the scale of the incoming Chaos armada. Meanwhile, the Inquisition continued to battle cults and hidden agents of Chaos within the worlds of the Sanctus Wall itself. Indeed, Sangua Terra, linchpin of the Sanctus Wall, is currently under mass invasion by Daemons.Support the show

Welcome everyone to another episode of the Adeptus Ridic's podcast. My name is DK.K. DiMontes, his name is Bricky. We know why you're here. You know why you're here. But before we get into it, if you enjoy today's episode of the podcast, and maybe you want to monetarily support us, head over to patreon.com slash Adeptus Ridiculous, where you can access to the Discord.

Blupers if they happen. $15 tier gets you access to all of our posters in Krispy, digital HD format, and oh, Bricky! There's a new poster. today. How do you feel? I don't know. I haven't seen it yet. Oh, you are going to hate it. I mean, so it seems like we're doing a double up now because we've got like fantasy. So I'm assuming it's fantasy? You would be right. Do you want to enlighten him and show him the goods as it were? We got a we got a little tool. Oh, Lord. There you go. Look at that. Highly requested

Croxigor pin up. Boy, look at that croxigre. And like any good croxigour, he is waiting for you to tell him what to do. Can I inform something unfortunate here? Sure. What's up? My first thought when I saw this was League of Legends. Ouch.

Wow. Damn, that game hurt you. Yep, it did. It did. That game has scarred, you, great. Greatly. Let me, so there, there's an old, there's an old thing called, there's an old, there's a character called Trundle.

He has, he has a traditional Trundle splash art that people simp over despite the fact that he's a troll. It looks like this. And I hope you understand where my mind, my mind, my mind went that way. Because it's very similar. You know what? Actually, yeah, now I see that. I see why your mind would immediately go, oh yeah, that reminds me of Trundle.

Also, Trundle sounds like a body part. Like a, like a... Yeah, you're thinking of Grundle. Oh, yes. Trundle's got the grundle. Yep. That was the old version from like 2010. Whoa, so he went from that to that?

He had a glow up. He had a glow up. Whoa. Okay. There needs to be a better word than glow up because that is way bigger than a glow up. That's crazy. Anyway, it's a poster. It is a poster.

Check it out at Orchidate.com. Link in the description. description, get all that awesome stuff as well as all the other cool merch. Apparently, Shai is upset about something or angry at people, which is pretty normal, but I'm gonna say that's 24-7, right?

So Shai's doing that meme of that man standing up in like the old, the old like boardroom or something. But apparently it is topic related. She has a bone to pick with particular commenters, viewers, I don't know. Some along those lines. Okay, okay, okay, okay, you have the floor.

shy you have the whoa holy shit that's so long okay people asking us why knockman rift and other safe passages through the cicatrix maledictum are important at all space is 3D right so you can just travel up out of the galactic plane

go around the rift and then go back down but we will talk about it more in our warp travel episode but it's basically the same question as if you travel from London to New York actually know this is a whole warp travel thing All right, well, all right, I'm going to go through the whole thing. You ready to do you?

Yeah, I'm ready. I'm ready. Same question is, if you travel from London to New York, why do you have to travel through the Atlantic Ocean where there are lots of storms and icebergs and not go around hugging the Russian coasts with the Alaska through Canada and then down the East Coast? Because it takes way longer.

And that's why. In addition, guess what happens when you travel too far outs of the Milky Way? You lose sight of the Astronomicon, get lost in the void of dark space, and die. Hate that. Also, ship travels the warp via a, sorry, ships travel the warp via the flow

in warp or warp lanes, like currents in the ocean, which accelerate their movement a great deal. Warp outside of galactic plane is not being fed by minds of sentient beings, therefore it's very calm. It means no demons, but it also means your ship is stuck in

still waters with no wind to fill the sails. Ship's speed will drop dramatically, and there's a big chance you'll run out of fuel and food and get gutted for meat by your starving crew long before you get back to the Milky Way. To be fair, ships that don't use Warp Tech, like Necrons or Tao, can more easily leave the Milky Way, but races like Eldar can't leave it because they move via Webway, and its Webway gates just don't exist outside of the galaxy. So, using direct routes where you can still see where you are going, have safe ports along the way, use warp currents to move fast, Remain closer to your allies is still the best option for warp travel instead of trying your logistics in dark space with Tyrinid hive fleets.

Logistics, people. Maybe I too have a little gilliman in me just like bricky and yvrain. Oh, that's right, Bricky, you got a little gilliman in you. Yeah, a little bit of rain in me, hopefully. Yeah, now you got a little gilliman in you, just like you've rain. That's all right. I'm okay with that. The guy seems nice. Oh, so you're cool with also being impregnated. by Gileman. I know you were going there, but see, because... Yeah, I'm sorry. It was. It was, but, like, it was. It was set up on a T for me, and it would, it would be remiss of me to not... Yes, yeah, I will accept the minus two, but again, it would be remiss of me not to take a swing, right? I had to. No, no, not really. Just because a minus two is prevalent does not mean it must be acted upon.

I tend to disagree. If that minus two is there and you know it's going to get a reaction, I feel like you, you are, you are, obligated to at least, at least, take a swing. Also, a total side note, because this is something that comes up in the Knockman War a little bit, there is also something in 40K known as the Mandible Point. And the mandival point is a specific part in the system that you choose to translate in and out of that place. It is the closest distance that a warship can safely enter or exit warp space from its origin or to a destination system respectfully. Because if you get any like,

if you try to emergency warp, escape, like, or enter too close to, you know, like a planet, you might just overshoot it and then land in like the planet and then die. Oh, yeah, you don't want that one. Yeah, you don't want to translate into the planet. Yeah, that'd be bad. It's kind of like, um, it's like parking your car

and walking to the restaurant. Like, yeah, you've got to park a certain distance away. Yeah, you definitely don't want to go speeding into the restaurant. Stop right at your table and then, you know. Yeah, this isn't a drive-through. Yeah, exactly. That's how Space Hulk's happen because too many of the ships enter the mandible point at a weird spot and then they get clunked together. Right, they just fuse and then hooray, the warp.

So, anyway, fun logistics. It's actually a little bit crazy that Games Workshop actually decided to illustrate all this. This is one of those things that normally, I think you could be totally. like, ah, it's, who cares? It's real cool. Yeah. But it's kind of neat that they actually did it, you know? Yeah, yeah. So the whole point for like the, uh, this, this, this Nacomond Rift gauntlet, is they're trying to save as many people on the other side of the cicatrix maledictum? Is that essentially what's going on? And that's why it's so important because they got to

get over there and like, there's still colonies and stuff trapped on the other side or, because I don't think I asked that last time, did I? You absolutely did ask that last time. But we can, We can re-work with that. Yeah, well, it's good for the review, because it's been a week. So the, a week. It's not even like like a month or anything. It's been a week.

It was literally a week ago. Listen, we're all getting older, man, all right? I know, I know, I'm aware. I'm very fully aware. All right, all right. But yes, you are correct. I'm sure shy you have the map probably somewhere ready and available. Yeah, obviously the Cicatrix Maledictum cut the galaxy in half.

And as far as we can tell, there are two. main lanes to make it through. So, you know, it's just like damn difficult to make it through. And as we talked about earlier, Vigilis, the big planet that was the main source of all of our discussion last week, has the beautiful blackstone. Apparently it's crust or something and it's been polarized by, we assume, necrons. Which is why it's kind of created that little lane because it just happens to have that there. Yeah, the old

Goatsey Lane, right? The old Goatsey Lane, that's right. Yep. And there is another one down south, though I think... Is that one as highly contested? I'm trying to remember if that one is the one near ball. No, ball's up on the other side.

No, ball, right now, ball is having a bad time. They're having a bad time. I think there's... There's a devastation of ball? Yeah. Yeah, that's that? Okay. I was going to say, there's a big devastation of ball.

So, yeah, I guess ball probably not in a great spot either. I thought there was one down south as well. I may be incorrect, but I was pretty positive. But it's regardless, yeah, you really want this thing opened up. Oh, yeah. Because it's really bad if you don't. Yeah. But all that with being said, as you know, we've had this long fight in vigilis.

And we've had this huge inquisitor. taken over people, torturing a few of them, providing the, the tender love of the Inquisition as a threat. Love to see it. The hospitality of the Inquisition. The hospitality of the Inquisition, exactly. Great, great stuff there. Oh, you know, quite a, quite a real guy.

Yeah, what a swell guy. Just, hmm. And so basically, as that happens, a few final tidbits arrive in Vigilus before things kind to start to settle down. The biggest one, and hilariously, is that a really big bell chimed a couple of times, and during some of the more crazier parts of the new, and I say, rag tag fear group that this Inquisitor has made, we get a little bit more of the general holiness themselves. This is kind of an interesting little stick here, or schick here. The Inquisitor guy Actually, I immediately forgot

His name Crap It's funny when you said Oh yeah, there's a bell that rings a few times I was like Scaven Skavin! Skaven are showing up to

Skaven are coming into 40K Oh my God! I genuinely though I don't think Skaven would work in 40K I don't think they're necessary at all Oh, Cardavolness That's right, that's his name Inquisitor Cardo Volness was noticing a pretty fancy

little effect going on right now. It's like real, not real space. The warp is kind of like has a little questing tendrils making its way around this area. It's really trying

to seal this place up. But as he created this rag tag group of crazed zeal and fear, this is kind of like calming it a little bit. You know, the level of, like, Saint Calgar, St. Marnius Calgar, the chapter master of the ultramarines, and the fervor here, the priests and the sisters of battle and this new zeal, like, like Puritan Inquisitor, all of them coming together. It's like kind of calming things a little bit.

Okay, okay. Okay, got it. Because we know what happens when you have a whole planet that's dedicated to faith in the emperor and faith in the cause, right? Only good things, obviously. Only good things. Depending on who's the main character. Depending on your definition of good. Of good, or if this is an Eldar book, you know, antagonist, protagonist.

But with that fanatic zeal, the real space, you know, kind of relaxing a little bit. A toll of a bell hit three times. And bada bing, bada boom. Guess who's angelic figure? Just bursts out of nowhere. I have no idea who. So, in fairness, there are a lot of angelic figures. Yeah, there's like the sanguador.

There's the sanguinary guard. Didn't they just get new minis today or something? They did. They took away our nipples. Again? Yeah, they get, I saw a tweet. And I think it was Brad from porn podcast. And he's like, we're getting rid of the nipples for, um, for the sanguinary gar,

but we're keeping the, the howling banshee bellybutton armor equal thirst. GW? It's fair. That's fair. But they do have those cool wings on their jet packs now. No, they don't. Angel wings. No, they don't.

They took them away. Yeah, they do. No, they're totally still there, aren't they? Nope. Oh, well, damn, that, I guess I saw the old one in. Yeah, you saw the old ones. There are no more angel wings on their jetpack. It's very sad.

Okay, that is way, way worse than the nipple thing. Okay, I guess they have this little painted angel. Yeah, they got those little things on the back there. So much worse. It's so much worse. Yeah, it is. It is. It is so much worse, comparatively. Yeah. Are they the ones that show up? No, it's Celestine. Of course it's Celestine. Of course it's Celestine.

I was going to say, I wouldn't have guessed Celestine because you didn't sound excited enough. Well, I mean, Celestein just kind of showing up and ruining people. It's just kind of her M.O. True. That's what she does, right? She just shows up in your time of greatest need, and hooray, it's Celestine. I mean, pretty much. And that's basically. like the sanguador. Just like the sanguador. It's basically what happens. Celestine arrived and put all these heretics to the sword.

And then was like, hey, other Canaaness and various other members of the Sisters of Battle, now that Celestine is here and like the entire planet has become this insane religious, like fervor because holy crap, Celestine is here. Yeah. It's like, hey, this little area down here, down in this other continent, I forget. of the end of the kind of, Dantoria. Dantoria, they're all lost. So let's burn it to the absolute ground.

So, all right. They go to the continent of Dantoria and literally raise the entire continent to the ground. All the sisters burn the damn thing to complete ash and are like, and it is seen from space and from the other continents as a flaming horizon. Wow. So they efficiently just burned a continent because it was just lost anyway. There's no salvaging it. We can't save it. Ash and dust. Radio act. Sorry. Thank you. I was hoping you were going to go there. I was like, I didn't do it to a tune, but maybe this, maybe you're right. Maybe even if it is a minus two, we have to say it sometimes. Yeah, see, you got to take a swing. It's like 50-50. You gotta take a swing, man, it's right there. It's sitting right there. Anyway, yes.

I mean, you know, she basically told it, she told the Canaaness leading an entire contingent of Sisters of the Bloody Rose, Celestine herself, to burn this place to the ground. Like, of course they did that. Oh, yeah. I guess if Celestine says to assist to the Sisters of Battle, do this. It doesn't matter what it is. You're doing it.

No questions asked. So vigilis at this point basically is chilling. The Imperial Command begins to reunite, get their discipline back. The churches actually end up wielding a lot more power here than most of the ADMEC and the planetary governors. Space Marines are like besides the Black Templar, that is. We're a little bit like wary about the surge of like massive faith, but it was. worked so like hey that's cool because even doing like a saint calgar is kind of weird um for them but even so uh where calgar yeah i mean it worked out no doubt but everyone besides

the templars were like oh it's a little weird um cal where calgar died they became or quote died became the new capital and you know so on and so forth okay however so things are looking up things are things are we're good things are things are we're good things are looking up for vigilis. Vigilus itself is it's working its way forward. The warp is kind of receding a little bit. We're living life.

Okay, cool. Then we get to part two. Oh, no. All right. What are they actually on a Necron Tomb World? Because that's where all the stuff came from and then they all wake up and hooray! Now we have the Necrons

to deal with. Yes. You beat me to a. I was about to read Harry's quote. Oh, Harry. Oh, Harry. So the next part of this is Warzone Knockman again. This is known as the Rift War. Heed my words. Hear each and every one.

The Knockman gauntlet belongs to the spoiler. He has decreed it so. To me, he has given the task of claiming it. To me, he has entrusted the mightiest fleet and the mightiest army. Countless millions now follow my command. And my commands are this. Destroy, seize, enslave, kill.

You simpering weaklings of the Imperium will see the towers of your cathedrums toppled. Your cities burned to the ground and your worlds turned over to the stuff of chaos. You will tremble. You will cry. You will shit and come. You will beg for relief that shall never come. You will plead for a mercy We will never give

I am Harkin worldclaimer Herald of the Apocalypse And Mouthpiece of Abadon I am your doom I am coming Oh hell yeah Harry Let's go Harry Our boy we love it

Hey he's coming He's like Herald Yep he is the herald of the Of the despoiler and he is coming Right he is like With all this destruction that he is heralding and all the doom he's proclaiming, man, he's eating good tonight.

Harold World Claimer, or I guess it's Harkin World Claimer, Harold of the Apocalypse. He's a guy of him. He's, he's, what a, what a Chad. What a Chad. So, in the wake of Vigilis doing somewhat okay, good old Harry here, Harold, has been given a fleet by Abadol. And I'm talking a fleet. I'm not sure exactly like if this is just the writers in GW wanting to up the scale or multiple writers kind of going back and forth and having difficulty understanding numbers because as we know they don't understand numbers. Yeah. This fleet is like like double the size of the fleet that took Kadia.

Whoa. Which like sounds crazy, but I'm kind of. of leaving that up to just, ah, like, the fleet that is attacking the knotman gauntlet here is double the size of like the five book series of Kedia in this 30 page,

like little rule book. I'm like, yeah, that's probably them just misunderstanding numbers and, yeah. And, hey,

he didn't, he didn't give Harry any blackstone fortresses to throw, so it's a little different. True, true. A little different. So, uh,

what, Harold has with this enormous force is that they, Vigilus is chilling a little bit, but in reality the planet matters, not a ton for Abadon's full picture. What he's looking more to do is icily and conquer every other world

around. And the first step of this is getting the night world derivar. Now let me tell you about the night world of Daravar, D.K. Okay. The night world. Sounds like a lovely place to just, you know, summer vacation to. Yeah, there it is.

It looks beautiful, yeah? Oh, yeah. That looks like, yeah. Wow, when can we visit? Holy. That's just like planet evil. Planet evil. It's what it is.

So Derivar is kind of hilarious. I won't lie, though. You've got to check these out. I'm going to screenshot these. The members of. of Derivar are really cool looking. You've got that Chaos Night Helmet there, and then you've got the, I think the High Queen on the other side.

Oh, yeah. That's really dope. That's so sick. Let's go. Very fitting for Planet Evil, sure. So the night world of Derivar is a chaos night world that is herald to House Mandela. Not mandragor or landaure, which sounds like the flayed one guy. It's house mandracore, mandra core.

And when you say chaos night planet, you mean they make chaos nights there, not like it is a just complete like darkness world. So it is a quote, planet that's always in night. Night with a K. Right. Okay, cool. Now, okay, now house mandricor is a fascinating house. So they turned traitor during the Horace heresy. When the horse was defeated, they ran back and they were expecting imperial vengeance.

And it never arrived. They destroyed all evidence of betrayal. And they were insanely paranoid. And they became, what's the phrase? You're like, almost like shut-ins, you know? Oh, okay. Yeah, they closeted themselves off. they yeah okay so they rebuilt their forces often with the help of some heretics folks uh and they just

never rediscovered them over the past 10,000 years until they started like navigating knockman again um originally the imperials extended a hand towards the nighthouse not realizing their treachery however because after so long they were like just covered in such generational fear and paranoia they freaked the hell out. and was like this had to be a ruse and they immediately started destroying the emissaries and attacking the shipping lanes. Oh, so in their paranoia,

they actually gave themselves away because they were too scared that they had already been found out. So they just killed the emissary. And they're like, oh, whew, now they'll never find out. And really the Imperium was like, okay, you're chaos.

Shy, that is one of the coolest photos I think I've ever seen. Oh. Yeah, that is pretty dope. like all of the serfs with the shields and the malls and you've got like the terror raptors flying around and that's so cool that is pretty dope

GW usually doesn't miss with the art to be fair no they really don't but regardless in order to kind of keep their safety they made deals in packs with chaos space marines they didn't really see any kind of redemption in this thing so they decided

to do their best to keep themselves, yeah, you know, like strong. However, like, because they were so scared of losing their wealth and power, the nobles, that is, very often the families arranged marriages between closer relatives. Oh, yuck. And so, the high queen and high king of House Mandricar are, in fact, siblings. This level of inbreeding has actually afflicted the nobles with this physical sickness. However, it has made their psychic abilities extremely more potent.

So badly has the inbreeding gotten by the nobles is that most of the times they don't leave their knights. They stay in the throne mechanicum for the most part too crippled to leave. and the particularly stupid inbred Hicks have actually taken the worship of Nurgel

to help save them from their disabilities whereas the ones that are more intelligent tend to lead towards Zich That is actually fair if you are just well yeah

Yeah So the person Imagine there being a plus side to It's like, Array my psychic power so much greater. Oh, but my wife is my sister. I mean, in

fairness, this is like 10,000 generational years. I'm sure they don't care anymore. But yes, their symbol goes really hard. Oh, yes, it does. God damn. And I believe it's assumed that, like I said earlier, the picture up there is the high queen.

And as you can see, even with all the stuff in her face, yeah, she's not looking great. No, no. She's really, yeah, nope, no, she could, she could use a day off. You know what, I agree, man. I've been really liking my days off. Bricky, that's the road you were heading down before you took, you know, you were like,

hey, I got to take a few days off. That's what you were becoming, my friend. I'm so happy for you that you finally found the way. Accurate image of a 25-year-old night shift worker. Actually, yeah. In a factory. Good old Harold is wants to take back this night world and relieve them and bring them towards his side. Now, with that, the Imperials are kind of aware of this type of thing.

And so there is a Marine chapter known as the Castellans of the Rift that were given the assignment from Gilliman in order to keep this place safe from all kinds of shenanigans. One of realizing this being an issue, they have done their absolute best to, stop, once they realize like Daravar and stuff, they have done their absolute best to stop Daravar from being a play in this world, you know? Okay, okay. They're getting to work. They're doing

their damn thing. They are doing their damned thing. That is very true. Okay. And so with this, the Imperials are like, okay, got to stop this. This is a problem. We got to deal with it. So they take a large

ensemble of imperial forces and make their way to Daravar, which is a little tough because it is right on the edge of the great rift. And so the rift is like kind of seeping a little bit, you know? So huge imperial force goes to Derivar. Things don't go great. Turns out because it's right by the warp rift, Derivar is naturally just covered in nothing but like random inhospitable warp stuff. and it turns into not like trench warfare, but just basically like a complete standstill. Daravar doesn't have enough forces to just completely wipe out the Imperials

and the Imperials can't get enough ground because of how inhospitable the terrain is. Life just kind of blows. It is a stalemate, unfortunately, for them. It is a stalemate. Now, Harkin, expecting this and planning this thing, was like, you know what, I actually don't really need Daravar. It's kind of like whatever,

because I've got this enormous force right now. However, I'm using it to break the Imperials down because they're in Daravar, and I'm going to use it to just absolutely crush them. So he takes a large amount of starter splinter fleet, sends him out, destroys anything in his way that might slow him down, calls upon his saboteurs and spies and sleeper agents,

anywhere that can, you know, anywhere that could slow his advance, basically. Okay, okay. And as he gets there, let's just say, like, it is an absolute just, I mean, you know how we have Pyrrhic imperial defeat or victories? Yeah. This is crushing imperial defeat. Oh. This is chaos dub incarnate.

Oh, but does he just kill all of them? Does he just slaughter everything that isn't chaos? He arrives in the Mandeville point and basically just like, like, it is such a gigantic fleet. Even the space marines are looking up at like, like looking like the Willem Defoe looking up kind of room. You know? They're just shadowed completely. Oh no. Absolute insanity.

Like an amount of folks. Like the world eaters arrive. Of course, they have their ursus claws and they overboard them. The night lords broadcasts dying screams of hundreds of. their slaves to cripple the astropaths and stop communication literally possessed chaos ships just like

eat other ships and like mall and Nash. Yummers. Yummers, bro. Yummers. Yummers. It was a totally doomed battle.

And of course, naturally the Imperial did plenty of Mardom stuff. They were like, oh, we're going to eat eat and buy a ship. We're going to blow all the engine corps. and take it with us. Yeah, self-destruct. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

That kind of stuff. But for the most part, like all the frontliners and all of the, the, what were they called again? Their name alludes me because it's so generic. Castellans of the Rift. Yeah. Castellins of the Rift basically did their best to hold off and get as many people on this ship. And even the Sisters of Battle were like, all right, yeah, we should probably leave. We should get the out of here.

We should get out of here. Now. now. So, yeah, even that they just did nothing but constant sacrifices of like, all right, hold them off, blow up your own shit as much as you can. Get off world. Get off world. This is bad. Yeesh. So it falls. It just, it is, it is, like you said, it is a chaos dub to the extreme. Imperials are dying, running away. Are there survivors that actually make it? Do they, or does Harry get them all? chapter math the name is guy's name is is gricks or gree or something like it's g r i x but like i want

to call it gree because i remember in that stupid um that what's that one video game where it's like gris but it's like gray because it's oh yeah yeah because it's like french or whatever yeah yeah yeah i always forget it so it's jett i never played it though i heard it was great anyway yeah it's like indie a very very pretty indie game it's most likely about depression and like there's a lot of those so you know yeah yeah yeah yeah um um um um I heard the music's good, though. Any you. Any you.

Yeah. So, I mean, he gets off with, like, a couple of his forces and stuff, but for the most part, the entire castles of the rift were just like totally crushed. The guardsmen are crushed. Everyone's just crushed. Okay. Well, Imperial Pyrrhic defeat. Yeah, not even Pyrrhic. Yeah, I guess there's nothing Pyrrhic about it.

Yeah, it's just, you got crushed under Harry's boot. Absolute Imperial devastation. Yeah. Devastating loss. casualties, all, well, except what's his face but do. Yeah. And what's even funnier about this is like, all of these giant battles always have some form of xenos in there, whether it's like or something.

Oh, you want to read this from Shai? Sure. It has become a symbolic act for Harkin upon making Planetfall to drive his spear deep into the world's crust and roar out the fell. promise that within eight solar days and nights, it will fall. He has yet to be proved false. Whoa. Really?

Hark and World Claimer has never, he's always claimed a world within 80 solar days. Always, he's never failed. I mean, listen. Yikes. He's got, uh, listen, he's got, he's got his, uh, he's got his plans, you know? He is he is harkin worldclaimer, right? Like he didn't get that name for nothing, right? He's on his grind set, all right?

He's on his world claiming grind set. All right, if you wait one hour after waking up to have your first cup of coffee, nothing can stop you. All right. All right, all right. Do your manifestations, okay? Wake up and perform your rituals to the dark gods, all right? Man, manifest it.

I will claim a world today. will do it. It's not about whether or not I want to do it. I will claim this world today. And then after that, make sure you hit 20 minutes on the stair stepper and 30 minutes of weight training. And then have only one glass of water during that time to prove mental toughness. Okay? Herald Worldclaimer, Sigma Grind. Damn. I'm waiting

for the catalog to show up about the the Herald World Claimer Sigma Conference or something. And he's motivational speaker conference by Harold World Claimer. That's what I'm waiting for. Harkin. His name is Harkin. His has a special rule in the game called Head Taker, but in reality, he's a bagmaker.

All right. He's got his Hell Spear and Harold's talent. All right. Set to the level 11, also known as set to gain. He leads raptors, also known as his posse. There's a part of him that wishes

we could make Harold Bag Claimer murder. Harold Bagg. He's just there with like the pimped out glasses like laying on a throne of money. Maybe laying down like breaking bad style, laying down on the money just like with his hands on his chest

and like the stunner shades. Just like yeah, Harold Bag Claimer baby. Let me tell you. You want to join Chaos. That's cool. No, but let me tell you a little bit about crypto. Oh no. Harkin would totally Oh, let me harken to you about Bitcoins.

Yeah. Anyway, so Harkin after making his gains on the Ethereum blockchain, he decided to head out over taking Derevar and all, oh, not DeraVar, Manderor. The people on Deraqar. It says barely a fifth of the imperial forces got off a DeraVar. No respite, hilariously, just for the sake of it, There's always like a Zenos group somewhere in here.

Turns of the Drukari were just kind of chilling. And they were like, oh shit, hell yeah. Four retreating imperial vessels. Oh, no. Oh, no. Fill the slave holes. Oh, no. Imagine you're like, oh, God.

Thank God we got off Mandra Corps. Boy, what a mess that was. Oh, we're one of the few to survive great. And it's like, sir, we have Dracari ships. translating in and it's like, oh no! That's worse! That's the end of it. Oh no.

You almost wish you had gotten killed by Harry. So the main final bit, the main final fight that really shows off like the somewhat finality bit of where we're at right here is the fight between Harkin as well as one of the Lord admirals of the Imperial Lord Admiral Quirin Prisca So Harkin is basically taken his group and he's just out there

murdering All right he's like sick Plunder this world for slaves and supplies Send a thousand sons band To attack the warp route and Like deal with all these other folks Have another world fall beneath You know the class

Or not fall beneath But like send like the world leaders after it And have them butcher it up. Classic fun stuff. Even one of them was them like arriving to a world and like cutting communications and then I think it was like some world that didn't know what was going on and it's like, oh,

the angels of death here are here to save us. Yay. Oh, you poor bastards. A lot of stuff like that. Poor sweet summer child. Yeah. Demons infesting the planet. Just great stuff, right?

Oh, yeah. Happy, happy, joy, joy. Great, great stuff. Oh, yeah, that's right. World's, um, uh, some world surrendered. They liberated Imperial worlds from Zenos invaders, making the citizens think they were the angels of death. That's right.

That's right. Oh, no. Great stuff. Um, so Lord Admiral Queer and Prisca had the idea to lead a rag tag group into Harkin's fleet, a strong, like, pyramid strike force to just push into, it and do their absolute best as a suicide mission to hold time for something they call the sanctus wall, which is basically a gigantic armada blockade of sorts. Oh, okay.

So she gathers as many rag-tag units as you can. Sisters of battle, space marines, large amounts of ships, and creates this triangle. And the goal, like I mentioned already, is to send it piercing down Harkins. fleet. It's called the battle for the narrow. Okay. Now, this included all kinds, I mean, this is like pure guerrilla warfare at this point. Void mines, vox jammers, fire ships, etc. There are all kinds of other types of disruptions that she throws out and said disruptions

are meant to not just hurt and do as much damage to hearken as they can, but also kind of turn on the fact that the chaos space marines aren't the most trustful. bunches. That's putting it mildly. Yeah, it's like, hey, okay, we can do all this kind of things to mess with and cause problems for his fleet, but also you turn off all of these different kinds of communication, you make issues like that. Next thing you know, the world eaters are like, what if we just like killed that guy next

to us right now? Right now. Yeah, they're getting a little trigger happy, you know, uh, corn is really wanting some skulls and some blood to flow. And it's just like, well, there is a thousand sun troop right next to us. We could just, yeah. Boom, axe to the neck. Boom, axe to the jugular.

Exactly. Just like that. That's exactly how they would say it. So there are options there, right? Yeah, yeah. And so she leads this strike force making their way through. And after like days and like actually days of waiting for the the traders to actually make their way to the mandible point, that's when she went full stop. It was like, all right, dead center, triangle, hit it in.

And then I started blasting. Mm-hmm. Okay. Okay. So what makes this part kind of particularly interesting is that kind of triangle formation was genuinely meant to cut up how. down the center. And by cutting a path down the center, both sides will isolate him. Not that communications is necessarily cut, but they do have Vox jammers. And so they're very much disorganized. As we know, a traitor fleet is not a unified force. It is a collection of

war bands come together. That are barely holding on some form of unity. Killing the traitors was secondary. Staying alive was the most important thing. It was all about buying time for the blockade of the sanctus wall to get set up and keep not only vigilist but the knockman gauntlet, goat

seed for the indomalous crusade on its way. I'm never going to look at this place the same again. I know. I know. That's okay. Yeah, never going to... The, um, sorry. It just made me laugh. The, it was stupid.

worry about it. You know the Indominious Crusade, right? It sure sounds familiar. Okay, so the Indominious Crusade was basically like the next step. We'll talk about this another day, but just to explain, this was the next step that occurred after the fall of Cadia.

This was the crack in the galaxy and then the resurrection of Gilliman. And because of that, this is basically the multi-fleet crusade led by Gilliman himself to reclaim the other side of the gauntlet. Okay, cool. Whatever he could from the other side. Okay, that's the Indominus crusade, got it. Yeah, the-

So, Nachman really important to that. Yeah, he wants to get to the other side and save everyone. Gotcha, yeah. For him, he really wants that. For the Indominus crusade to work, you kind of need the Knockman gauntlet. The Indominious Crusade is still currently ongoing, by the way. Oh, yeah. There's a lot of territory to cover.

I don't imagine he's going to be done with that anytime soon. Honestly, it's almost used as like a late, a long-term, you know, story beat where often the Adomis crusade arrives in the nick of time and is able to help, you know. Okay. It happens a lot. There's sort of the Deuce Ex Machina. sort of the ghost in the machine. They're used as like the, oh look,

they just happened to arrive and solve all the problems. Hooray! A little bit of that sometimes. But the Indominious Crusade, like, I think it was the beginning of 9th or maybe the beginning of 8th.

It was the Indominus box set, and it was like, you got like Gilliman and like Deathguard and it's a whole thing. So, Admiral, or Lord Admiral Prisca completely jumped in,

did their very best to survive the long as they came. exploit all of the ridiculous like, you know, entropy or whatever, backstabbing of the chaos fleet. Um, prolong as much as possible. And surprisingly, killed a decent amount. Uh, hark, even Harkin was like, shit. I'm going to add that to my next, uh, self-help book.

Uh, my next motivational speech, I'm going to talk about that. Absolutely. You, you will become a gazillion. You will take over the knockman gauntlet. You will crush the Imperial's ability to tax you. Hell yeah, brother. Hell yeah, Harkin. I'm with you, buddy.

I'm with you. So despite all of this, Harkin and his immense fleet still absolutely did not fold. They took a lot of casualties, but not like a casualties that would actually make a large difference. Yeah, it's not like they're suddenly retreating. back into the warp or something. They are still going strong. Yes. And so they eventually pincered surrounded Prisca's fleet and just aided alive bit by bit.

Oof. So her strategy kind of worked, but, uh, nope. It is, uh, it is, well, it did. Oh, that's the thing. It did work in a way. Um, Prisca's fleet had been absolutely demolished wholesale, complete. an utter defeat in terms of damage. Yeah.

However, any kill that they racked up often did not work very well either because any imperial ship that was destroyed was often taken over by chaos and retrofitted back into their fleet. So the kills didn't much matter. That being said, the sanctus wall did get their time. They survived long enough. and eventually the Indominus Crusade fleet arrived to reinforce the Sanctus Wall and keep them up, along with the Crusade Battle Group, in order to keep things going. Part of the Indominious Crusade, not like Gilliman himself.

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. So, Imperial Period victory. Not necessarily. Well, yeah, I guess not quite because... Yeah, yeah, yeah. So the thing is here is that the Rift War doesn't end with like chaos leaving with their tails between their legs. It leads with, I'm actually pretty sure it leads to the Harkin being like, huh, neat. There's a, like, what a giant new fleet at the Sanctus Wall.

Everybody, make warp junk to the sanctus wall. Let's fuck them up. Oh, so the Indominious Crusade shows up. big fleet and he's just like, oh, well, that looks like fun and he just rams it head first? Well, so that's, well, jumping too far ahead, you got, you missed the mandible point, D.K. Oh, sorry. Yeah, I did. I've gone clear past it.

I'm a space Hulk. I've merged with something way too far ahead. I am just overflowing with chaos and tyrannids and, oh, man. Can you imagine an overzealous, like, imperial navy ship that, like, warp translates too close and then arrives like in the planet that wait wait what a fantap wait a minute that must have happened to someone like there must be some crazy stories about like oh yeah we just really want to get into it and i just had the coolest idea ever chaos during during the horace heresy or some time chaos adjusted the communication of a large contingent of mandival points in this system

So when a huge Imperial fleet arrived, half of them translated into the planet itself. And so this new planet is now a hive world, but its hive structures are actually large class battleships, straight halfway in the ground, straight sticking upright, like giant hairs into the sky. A hive world made out of imperial ships that have accidentally translated into the... Dude, that would be dope. Oh, that'd be so cool. That'd be so cool. Oh, that'd be so badass. That is the coolest thing ever.

All right. There's a new idea. Ship it? Hell yeah. Ship it, yep. Anyway, despite all of this, Admiral Prisca did buy time for the crusade to arrive and reinforce sanctus. this allowed the narrow to be a bit like, the delay they caused in the narrow

allowed it to keep a few imperial forces here and there. A couple of them made their way back to the actual sanctus wall telling of their defeat. Quote unquote, defeat, but also like kind of victory, but also kind of defeat. He did what they set out to do. They're just all dead. Harkin, in a weird display of not Sigma male, decided not to take any

prizes initially from the Imperials. He delved it out along his other hosts, which is both good and bad. It's good because it's like, hey, this might re, like, what's the word? Redouble loyalty, but it also might show he's kind of weak for not taking his prizes. Okay. But he did take one prize. He was able to recover Admiral Prisca herself. Oh

She so she's So she survived this? Is she not dead? She herself is still alive Prisoner? Yes, she is in one of his torture cells And he will get to learn everything He possibly can from her

And we'll Because they really were happy with how Prisca did this She was named a saint And they gave her a battleship in her honor Huh So when it's time He's going to basically just brought her horrifying screams and face across the world to be like, yeah, that saint that you said survived and everything, I've been torturing her for years.

Ha, ha, ha. Oh, man. So, oh, boy, she is not. So she's, she's probably not thrilled that she survived. She probably wanted to, you know, I'm surprised she didn't finish the job herself knowing full well what would happen if anyone found her. Take the, take the coward's way out as they say it. Uh, something like that. Yeah.

It's better than being in Harold World Claimers torture cell. It very much is. I would agree. But unfortunately not. She has been taken. And at the point here, yeah, Harkin is like, all right, the sanctest wall, here it is. He has crossed the gauntlet. The wall is within reach.

Once it falls, he will be able to completely cut off the world. And now onwards. and we'll see what happens next episode of Dragon Ball C. Ah, you blue-balling, son of a bitch. GW. Oh, I mean, I wasn't the one of blue-balled you. Like, this is the end of the Rift War. Oh.

This book came out like a year ago. It's particularly recent. Oh, so that is just, that's where the book ends. There's nothing more yet. Oh, yeah. We're done. Oh, I thought you were just like, Oh, yeah, I'll tell you what happens next time.

Oh, damn it, GW! Well, if there is something more, Shai has not revealed this to me yet. Oh, okay. Oh, don't worry, Shai. I was about to get to Bade. Bade? Okay. That was the one thing we had to chat about.

So at the moment, right, for the most part, this is like the little Dockman story. This is the importance, and more so than anything, this battle is just to reinforce the importance of things like shipping lanes, you know, the importance of like traveling in the warp and all that kind of fun jazz. As you said before, there's always a little bit of a Zeno's presence. So you remember our friend, Uri and Rackhartth, right? The name is super familiar.

Okay, that's fine. Head homunculus of the covens. Oh, right, right. I remember we did talk about him because I was like, oh, yeah, this is not Uriel Vend. interest, right? It's like, no, this is Uriyan. Uriyan rackards. Uriene, right, right, right, okay. So he arrived at the Nakhman Gaon because he was looking for new flesh.

Oh, no. I know, right? Oh, no. I know. So he found actually a world, huge one, like billions. I think it's like 20, 25 billion people. Okay. Enormous amount of people.

And clearly, they were, they were, sorry, not clearly, but they were isolated from the conflict between the Imperials and the chaos. And he was like, you know what? I don't want to just, like, steal them. That's not really fun. I want them to willingly join me. So he cut all communications from the planet. They actually use torture engines connecting to noles, like blanks, and amplified it to extend over the planet.

Oh, yeah. He then baited an orc fleet to the planet. Now the humans fought it without any assistance. The orc invasion killed quite a few humans, but that's okay. That's okay. That's okay. No big deal. The humans became desperate enough to accept his help.

And so he arrived and made sure, don't get me wrong, that his least liked friends were on the front lines of the battle. Because this is the Drukari we're talking about. Eventually, they were able to take out and destroy most of the orcs. And the imperial defenders were extremely thankful for this. They earned the humans trust and the planetary governor was just, Urien was honored by the planetary governor. Oh. And so Urian was like, hey, hey, governor, clear this is a bad spot for you.

Let's relocate the population of Bade to, my homeworld, where you will be able to be free from the orcs and other threats. I mean, he's not technically wrong. You probably will be free from orc and other threats on his homeworld. So they agreed to his offer, and in the next few months, the Drukari transported billions of humans to Kamara. Oh. Eventually, the planet was empty and the orcs took it over. Of course they did.

Sure. What a guy. What a guy. Wow. Oh man. So the orcs have the planet. He's got a literal planet of slaves that are now in Comra in the in the fighting pits or in the homunculite covens or whatever it is they do with human slaves that I don't want to know about. Oh, that sucks. What an, I mean, cheeky of him, but what an asshole. I love, yeah. Once in the dark city, all pretense of friendship was dropped and great horrors were enacted upon the hapless human. refugees. Oh, well, I had no idea. I thought they offered them tea and cookies. Can you imagine like being Urien and having this work and pay off and you're like, sick, bro, 20 billion subjects? Yeah. Maybe like 15 billion. I'm sure a lot of them died in the Ork War, but like billions of subjects.

Yep. Oh, man. If you imagine being one of the subjects, it's like, oh, everything is going so great, no more orcs to worry about. We're going to a lovely new plow. What is this place? Like, as soon as you look out the window, it's like, oh, no, we've been had. Like, as soon as you even get a glimpse of Comra, it's like, oh, we're screwed. It is, yep. It's lovely.

It's just such a Drukari thing to do. Oh, it's so a Dracari thing to do. Yep. They're so, so awful. Yeah, the orcs are probably like, we're all the, you know. Umis. What the hell? The orcs might be the most upset about this whole thing because they just got to take the planet without fighting. They missed out on all the crumpin.

Yeah, but now I guess they're in a better spot. Now they can do more crumpin somewhere else. True, true, true. What a, what a time. I love. Oh, Drukari. You know, I gotta be honest, ever since that, ever since that knew that Drew Carrey book, ever since, well, I guess it's an orc book, but, you know, like, ever since the big DACA, I've had such a bigger fondness for the Kari. They're just

like, they're such assholes, but they're so... They really are. They remind me a lot of, like, the Imperials at times, where they're just like, but they're so pompous about it. They're just like... They're so matter of fact about it. Like, it's not even a big deal to them. Yeah, they were like in the gladiatorial pits

watching, and then like they had like a human slave just on the table. It's like, ooh, carve a piece of meat, shall we? Yeah, the human on the table is just a chartchutory board for them. Just like, oh yeah, a little, little slice of skin, maybe the little thigh made for your palate? It's like, oh.

It's just, it's so funny to me. I don't know. There's such, it's almost like they become so horribly evil that it's gone to becoming funny because it's like, it's like so mona. Okay, totally random. You know, you, do you know Ian McDermott, um, actor who plays Palpatine? Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Like, he's so evil.

But when you just get that, that, that, you get him hamming it up in the various Star Wars movies where he's like, oh, I'm positive. This death star will be quite operational when your friends arrive. He's just like giving Luke shit. That's the perfect example. Just like, what an ass. He's so great. He is great.

That is, oh, man. He has all those voice acting moments where he's just like, ah, ha, ha, ha, do it. It's so funny. Anyway, I just keep thinking about that every time I hear about, He would make a great Dracari. He would. He would make such a...

He makes such a good guy. Same action. Same everything. He would fit in grading Kamara. Ian McDermott as a as a Drukari homunculus, leader of a coven would so work. It would fit so well. Oh, absolutely. Sign it up.

Make it happen. Gdub. You've got gobs and gobs of money anyway. Do it. Do it. Do it. Do it. All right.

So we've got a We've got homunculus coven Palpatine and we have Sigma Grindset Herald World Claimer If we don't see fan art of at least One of them What are you even doing?

Listen, what are you even doing? Take the money you spent on replica Destiny guns and put it towards your own fan art Well, hey, listen, I've only spent a little bit on replica destiny gun singular, there's only one, and you peer-pressured me into buying it. No, you were like, I want to do this, but I don't know if it's a good idea.

And I simply, I simply gave you a little... You were like, DK, I know how much money you make. You're fine. Do it. And I was like, he's right. I said, brother, it's time to enjoy yourself. Get some cool stuff. And I was like, well, fine. Spend more money on Gunpla, dude. Check up my new book on Audible. how to how to destroy the imperial defenses and make a billion dollars with these easy steps

the three step process to the three step process to total imperial annihilation how to how to how to how to how to find the most willing slaves for your dark god rituals that yes oh man we've done good work today today we've done good work today we've good work today. Yeah. Today it was a good day. Excellent. All right. I'm going to go, repeat my 10 chaos god affirmations.

Yeah, I need to buy plane tickets so I can go attend the motivational speech by Harold Worldclaimer. You know, they're having the Gary Vaynerchuk fucking crap up in Los Angeles lately and I'm like, you know, I just can't

imagine if it's like Harold World Claver's up on stage. just like, you will kill the Imperials. You will serve chaos. You'll get the favor of not one, not two, not three, all four gods. Push the whopper button. All right, I'm out of here, peace.