Adeptus Ridiculous - RESURRECTION OF ROBOUTE GUILLIMAN | Warhammer 40k Lore

Episode Date: June 2, 2021

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Welcome everyone to another episode of the Adeptus Ridiculous Podcast. It's that podcast where I, D.K. Diamante, is a fairly kind of sort-ish nub. Learn with you, the listener, about all of the most ridiculous things in Warhammer 40K from our resident, sort of expert, Bricky. But before we get this episode started, if you enjoy the podcast, definitely head on over to Patreon.com slash Adeptus Ridiculous and support the podcast. You get access to our Discord. a lot of HD posters.

We have like this elder that has these washboard abs. Obviously, you know, the big asses that everybody is impressed with. There's also a TOW one that just came out that is very nice. So definitely patreon.com slash adeptist ridiculous if you enjoy today's episode.

And I'm going to throw it over to Bricky to tell you about the merch and the book club. I didn't need you to try to sell it that hard. Well, I mean, I'm selling it as hard as her abs, bro. Dude, I was just like, hey, you want, everyone wants a big titty, goth, Jukari GF, but then they're always like, oh, now stop torturing me.

Yeah, now you can have one, and you can print it out, put it on your wall, patreon.com slash debitsch ridiculous, right? Right, right? You know what else? Sell it the poster, he says to me. You know what else? Adeptis Ridiculous is doing. We're doing a wonderful book club on the Infinite and the Divine.

This is your last chance. You got like two to three days to read that damn thing before the video comes up. So you know what? You best get going on that soon. Get an Infinite and Divine, Trayson, and Orkin. It's freaking amazing. Also, check out our merchandise at in the description, basically, or at Orcidate.com. And you can check it out in the Adept's Ridiculous tab. Those Van Dyer stickers. Adeptis ridiculous. I'd say that fast is hard, man. Adeptus ridiculous? It's really not. But that's okay. Shut.

Adeptis ridiculous. Adeptis ridiculous. Adeptis ridiculous. Adeptis ridiculous. Adeptis ridiculous. Adeptis ridiculous. It's easy. Wow. I didn't think I'd be flexed on from language skills. You can get shirts and hoodies. Anyway, Shai says that she has something to show both me and D.K. That we're supposed to react to. And that is just sheer fucking... Oh my God. Never mind. This is great.

Yo, did somebody make an actual Doge Van Dyer Mini? I was so ready for some horrible shit. Look at his fucking chain. He's got a Doge chain. That's amazing. Look at his bling! Oh my God, that's great. I was expecting some cringe-ass video.

Wait, wait, D.K., look at the purity seal. All sister shall be, like, something, something be barefoot. Oh my god, I couldn't quite see what this. He has many wiki feeds pages to edit. Oh, here it is. Letter from the Creator of the Mini, my name is Obsessive underscore Converter on Instagram and Facebook. If you help me reach 5K followers, I will sculpt Alicia Dominica with anime eyes and a baseball bat. Also, I'll soon be streaming two-hour sessions, teaching how to sculpt basic stuff and giving away the conversions I do on the stream.

you can find both on Twitch and YouTube under the same name. So this gentleman, obviously named Obsessive Converter, obsessive underscore converter, I guess created this. I'm not going to call it abomination because it's actually really well done, but I will call it curse. That is sick. A little cursed, but it's fucking great. Doge Van Dyer, as a creation, is cursed.

And it's very nature is cursed. It's existence is cursed. That's true. This is fucking great. this for a missionary model or something for my new sister's codex? That's incredible. That is so

a 180 from what I was expecting. I was expecting, like I said, I was expecting some cringe-ass video of, I don't know, like a fucking anime take on something or another 40K, but this, this is the best timeline. This is the timeline of light.

Oh my, oh my God. He said he will send it to me. Let's fucking go. Oh, no. Let's fucking go. That shit's gonna go on dice check. That's gonna be in the first episode of the new Sisters Codex Army. Let's, oh my God, I'm so hype.

Okay, cool. Oh, that's great. Oh, my God. Thank you so much. This is fucking great. It's the best news. Oh, my goodness. I wonder if it's 3D printed.

Or if it was a three, if it was like a scope like green stuff and all, or if it was an STL file that was 3D printed. Because if we can get a goddamn, oh, it was green stuffed. Okay. Okay. I gotta be honest. If we could get an Skillible.

STL file of Doge Van Dyer that we could give to the community so they can 3D print their own Doge Van Dyers. How often do you think that would show up? Can you imagine going to a GT tournament or something? And some guys like, hey man, I'm playing sisters. I want to use this mercenary or a missionary. Do you mind if I substitute this model and he pulls out Doge Van Dyre? And the other guy's like, what the fuck is that? Is that a Doge?

What the fuck is wrong with you? Well, you know, it would be even better. you go to a tournament and you fully intend to break out Doge Van Dyer and like you're playing this guy like, oh yeah, I'm gonna replace this with Doge Vandr. And the other guy's like, oh my God, I love Doge Van Dyer. Of course you can use it. This is the best. Or better. Or better yet, you get a mirror match and both of you ask the same question about bringing your Vymeier.

I have an awkward question for you, bud. I have an awkward question for you too. You both bring them. Oh, man. I can't wait for that to happen one time and for the other guy to be like, no, you can't use that. I'll roll around in my grave when I hear that. Anyway, that's fucking awesome.

This is the best day. This is the best day. I'm so stoked. I wish this was on our overall sisters episode because it would have been more topical. But it's okay because today's episode we discussed a bit, a bit. We're on like episode five.

What was it? Horace and the Luna Wolves, Abidon on the Black Crusade, fall of Cadya, Gilliman in general, and now, well, this was supposed to be the Indomitus Crusade and the Taryn Crusade, everything after that. But your boy was doing his research and was like, hey, the Taryn Crusade and the Indominus Crusade are very long. They're nothing but giant battles. There's probably just that, but they feel a little,

I don't want to say boring, but there's lots of battles instead. stuff. And then I was like, okay, I'm just going to start reading it. And I started reading about the resurrection of Gilliman in its own right. And I got really invested. And most of my notes are on the revival of Gilliman. And I thought, okay, we're five episodes in. We'll do the crusades some other time. After this episode, we'll return to normal. Well, maybe we'll do another legion or we'll do another faction, as he knows, who knows. We'll go back to the standard different topics per episode kind of thing.

But for today, I wanted to cover specifically one thing, because I don't think we need try to edit another hour and a half video. And that is specifically on the resurrection of Gilliman because actually it's pretty fucking cool. Yeah. I'm actually pretty hype because I'm super interested to see like, I'm not exactly sure how they revive him. I guess I'm more interested in like when he actually gets revived.

because there's someone like Gilliman that was alive back in like the Horacee, current Imperium has got to seem very heretical and very like just, oh boy, you guys misunderstood a lot of what we were trying to do back then. So I am super excited about how he gets revived and how he feels about everything around him when he gets revived. That is the most exciting part to me. honestly the battle itself is pretty great but everything else mainly about like just the the conversations between there's a meme I saw a while ago right and it was two it was it was

the difference between men and women when it comes to watching movies and it's like okay women will watch pride and prejudice for the 17th fucking time in a row and cry every time and then it was a lady who was like men would much rather watch a three-hour movie about guys being sad where nothing happens. And as someone whose mom has watched Pride and Prejudice 40 times, and as someone whose favorite movies

are Blade Runner and no country for old men, both of these statements are correct. They are pretty accurate. And so all the action scenes and stuff as cool as it is, for me, doesn't hold a candle to talking. I love good talking.

Writing conversations is cool. So cool. I could substitute pride and prejudice with Titanic, but yeah, the same idea. It could. The point remains. Either way, either way, let's get into those. Let's get it going. So, the Acadia, you know, bad times. Super bad times. Not particularly great, little rough, little, not great.

Not great. So, unfortunately, after Avedon was like, yeah, Right after that, they basically need to start evacuating all the survivors. Now, these survivors were known as the Celestinian Crusade, and named after you can guess who. And this Celestinian, well, okay, so, so let me back this up. Blackstone Fortress was thrown into Cadia. I had terror, start expanding. They need to leave now, right?

Immediately. Immediately. So calls packed with that old harlequin. I think it was Solitaire maybe, I forget This helped him with him Or helped him with this a little bit And so the surviving warriors Specifically

Made their way over And were able to actually get out Through the assistance of the Eldar Now these surviving warriors Were St. Celestine A decent amount of sisters of battle Of course Oh, Celestine's Gemini Superior

I don't know if you know who those are She has like two bodyguards that are kind of a little bit like her, except for the wings. Okay. Yeah, I had no idea who they were, but all right. She has two bodyguards, basically. They're their own characters. You have Inquisitor Grafax, which I didn't talk much about.

We'll have to talk a little bit about them in a moment. Immediately, I thought, immediately I was like, oh, he's like, send me the Carfax. Send me the Grafax. We're here to talk about your Avedon going all the way through the warp, blowing into Acadia, uses a Vox signal to go over to Creed and he's like, I'm here to talk to you about your car's extended warranty. Oh, no.

Oh, God. Everybody knows. Everybody has the same feeling when you say that. Everyone groans excessively. Hang up. Stop calling me. There's a bunch of black Templars as well. And all these forces make their way out.

And I got to do a little bit of flashback stuff. So let me tell you a little bit about Inquisitor Graham. Grafax, all right? She's a new character. Inquisitor Grafax a very long time ago, probably like hundreds of years. It was her, she's an inquisitor of the Ordo Hereticus. So that is specifically the Ordo of the Inquisition that deals with Heretics, of course. That one should be rather obvious. The Ordo Zenos deals with aliens. The Ordo Amalius deals with demons. Grafax is a very recent character, and she and her group of Tempest to sign. were stolen by a certain Mimi robot man and they were captured by him and during the battle Acadia he used them in the pokey ball and threw them out and so Grafax and her Sions were there to help fight during all that genadigans yeah now Grafax I actually listened to an audio like play audio novel thing called Our Martyr Lady it's about Grafax and Celestine fighting off some chaos stuff

and it's interesting learning about Grafax she is a hard woman she is very very angry all the time and she does not like Celestime she has this kind of idea of like faith is

faith is used often as a tool for the non-righteous to prove that they are righteous so she looks at the greater demon of the emperor with a lot of disgust you know so she's a

pretty hard woman she's very like she's the psycher she'll root out traitors in all these different kinds of ways she can like mess with their minds and stuff

she's pretty smart but she's very like harsh going from there with Carl Celesteen black Templars some Skittari obviously we got to talk about

the Yanari oh okay So this is where we get into Yvrain, which I'm sure you've seen the memes. Yeah, I have. Yep, yes, you have. I have Roba Gileman's Big Boob, Guth, Eldar wife. I know these memes, and I know nothing about 40K.

Yeah, I hate people. So we'll talk about the meme a little bit later because that's an important. I hope, I hope that she's in the thumbnail with Gileman. I hope this thumbnail involves the two of them because it would just, it would sink the knife in. So Yvrain, so talking about the Yonari is important when it comes to Yilliman. So Yvraine is also known as the daughter of shades.

Now, if you remember, Eldar are pricks. And Eldar, in their own rights, are very mysterious, weird, sly people, right? Yes, they are. They're very fast also. Like they are blindingly fast Just from their movement and all But sure

Typical space elf Yvrain has been kind of all over the place Did you ever watch Adventure Time Um Well it's You don't need to watch Adventure Time We're talking about Warhammer right now Yeah

But so my girlfriend showed me a lot of that And there's I'm sure Shy will give me imagery for this but there's this character called Tree Trunks Which is this old old woman playing an elephant There's an episode where she, like her life, she was a pirate. She was like a dancer. She was constantly leaving other men to pursue like excitement. She has this like crazy ass backstory in this kid's show.

Yvraine kind of has that feeling a little bit where she's been around. For a long time, she was a dancer, and then she was a warlock, and then she was an aspect warrior, and then she led Eldar Corsairs. And then there was a mutiny against her. So she flew into the webway where she ended up in Kamara And she fought in Kamara as a gladiatorial lady a gladiatrix And in the crucible she was like a succubis basically She's been she's been around she's done a few things yeah she has

Seems like she's let a life So so her like insane life basically at one point she was fighting in the arena and she actually had lost to a priestess. And when she was there, killed in the gladiatorial arena, there she was basically seen by this god. Eldar have their own gods. They have like the avatar of Kane,

which is the god of like war, but it's their version of the god. They have their own kinds of gods. I think like Kegarak is like god of the laughing god of the Harlequins. So basically you need, Y-N-N-E-A-D is the god of death for the Eldar. And when she died there,

Yenid actually ended up having her to act as his prophet in the material realm and rebirthed her from death. And therefore, her as a craft world Eldar lady, at least I think so, would not have her soul taken by Slanesh, if you remember that that's what happens when they die. or it goes into their soul stone. Basically, he literally revived her from death.

And this rebirth caused a lot of problems in Comerog. And a whole bunch of demons of Slech kind of started bursting through there. Nothing that the city couldn't eventually deal with, but like, oh my God. But with this, she was running away from Vect, who was hot on her tail, along with a bunch of followers of the Jukari, because she was kind of preaching this idea, now that she's like the prophets, that you need the god of death. They now have this idea that like a cycle of death and rebirth

from the god of death is their way to stave off Slanesh. Oh, I was about to ask that. I was going to say like, so other than like Soulstone or being a Dracari, this is theoretically a way to save yourself from like your soul going to Slanesh, but she obviously can't do this for everybody. So problems, I assume. Right. And it's somewhat assumed that, like, once you die for the first time,

that soul is no longer Slaneshi taking the bull, I think. I'm sorry, Yanari's fucking hard. But the long as short of it is that she, with some dark elder followers and this other really mysterious Boba Fett-looking warrior guide called the Viby. the Vizark, the Vissark, made their way to escape from Kamarag. And so at that point, she got back to her craft world. And through that craft world, they had the entire craft world undergo this insane up and down of death and rebirth, death and rebirth, death and rebirth.

And that brought something called the Yinkarn. I'm sorry for these names, which is the avatar of Yenid, like a demon of Yenid into being. So the assumption is that in order to have them no longer embrace or have difficulties with Sanesh and embrace this cycle of life and rebirth, this is like the way of the Eldar. Hence why they're known as the Yanari, which is called the Reborn. And the Yanari is a combination of craft world, Drukari, and Harlequins. It's followers from all three groups. Boy, that's a party I don't want to attend.

Yeah. It's Honestly, honestly, the Yonari are, we'll have an other episode on them eventually. I'm not even close to covering that. That is.

Yeah, they're weird. Yes. I have about as much knowledge on them as I do about the fucking Alpha Legion. Their gods look cool, though. The picture is shy pose. They look sick. It's,

actually kind of an interesting spin on Eldar. They're still cocky sons of bitches, but if you don't want to be the the murder-torture ones, or you don't want to be the clowns, and you don't want to be the wee-boo assholes, then this is like a nice in-between. Couldn't you, well, since

they're mixed of like Kraft World, Drukari, and what was the other one, couldn't you take from all the, oh, the Harlequins. Couldn't you take from all those factions and just mix them and just be like, yeah, I'm playing as the Yanari. That's actually what Unari is in the tabletop.

You can mix and match all three Eldar factions in the one. Okay, and then you're technically playing as the... That makes sense. I'm dumb. Okay, good. But you do lose some benefits from each, which is why the faction is not very good right now. Okay. But anyway, that's a whole thing on the Yanari. Long story short, obviously against chaos, the Yanari are very, very anti. They're trying to figure it out.

So, thanks to that pact that call set up earlier, Yvrain, as well as the Vissarq and members of the Unari, actually opened up a Webway portal and was able to help all of the surviving members of Kadia. So they popped out there in a Webway portal and they let in Celestine, Greyfax, call Black Templars, everyone to get inside that portal. And that's how they were able to escape. So they were then able to go through the Webway and teleport back out. in, well Oh no, where did they end up? So, so,

so, so they ended up actually in in Ultramar. Remember Ultramar, right? The giant Ultramar. Ultramar. Ultramar.

Ultramar. We're the ultramarines from Ultramar and we're ultra cool and we're ultra I fucking hate Ultramar. So, so, So when they got to Ultramar, the whole thing is that after the fall of Kadia, Abadon was now going straight for Ultramar. Abadon was like, all right, jobs done, let's keep it up.

And so he then began something called the Ultramar campaign, where he was then sending all of his forces to Ultramar to hurt people. You know, Avedon does. I would assume so. Man, I hope he wins. I know he won't Because you can't get rid of the Ultramarines Man, I've never wanted a villain

To destroy a place more than I've wanted to see Ultramar be despoiled Well, the despoiler Is coming to Ultramar with his full fleet And they basically showed up And this is parts from the book But basically Call is all like According to my internal gyro cartologue

We do not stand upon the surface of McCrague which is obviously the Ultramarine Homeworld. We are located 160 million miles spinward of our intent destination, allowing for variable positioning and empiric distort. And I'm just like, thanks to call. Like, where the fuck are we?

And then Yvrain is there, and she's all like, would you not have been gladded munkai? You know about the munkai thing, right? I don't think I do. Oh, wow, that's surprising. Eldar call humans munkai. Ah, because you...

Monkey? Because you can't call people monkey. That's politically not okay. But the Eldar do see them as horribly inferior, so they're known as the Monkai. It's an insult, obviously. Naturally. I mean, I guess if you're an Eldar, you would look at a human and be like, look at this inferior animal. Yep. That's why they're, that's why I think Eldar are douches. But she says, would you not have been glad in the Monkai to find. that my people kept a or sorry would you have been gladded to find that my people kept a hidden way upon the service of one of your most prized worlds and so the webway portal took them to an ultramarine world and the black town bar guy is like no no we would not we would not like that everything here is very tense because to say that people don't like the elder as an understatement in the sense of 40K especially. And now you've got the Black Templars, which are basically Sisters of Battles,

space marines in terms of their zealitism. And you've got an Ordo Hereticus Inquisitor there. And the only person there who's like being nice is two people. Sorry. Two people. Call. Because he's like, we need help, beep, boop. And Celestine

because she's just nice. It's fair. Everybody else is probably, they probably want to kill each other, but they fucking can. I am surprised that not a lot of people like the Eldar Is it just because they're douchebags in lore Because like I think everybody likes a space elf Oh no no no no sorry

I don't like the space elves because Fighting against them in gameplay is agonizing And because they're douchebags Plenty of people think the elder are cool That was that was specifically Sorry I was referring to I was referring to the Imperium Really doesn't like the Eldar

Like people don't like the Eldar in lore That makes sense to me. I'm like, okay, okay. Imperium doesn't like the fucking Zenos elves. Not a big shocker. Yeah, I thought you meant like just fans in general. I was like, whoa, like my whole

being was shifted with that. No, people like the Eldar. Craft World Eldar is a very popular faction, despite the fact that Games Workshop hasn't released a model for them since Bill Clinton was in president. Was a president?

Why? Why? Why? Release the elves. No, no, no, that's half a joke. They made a couple, but by a couple, I mean like, I mean like two. The entire model line is basically that old, so yeah. They need new models. The Jukari look good. Yeah, the craft world of our needs help.

Point being, point being, basically it's like, hey, we're on this world that your species calls Lafis in the star system of McCrogg. So they're in the same star system as McRagg. And she said, in order to proceed, we need to locate the representatives of the ultramarines. And then one of the Celesteins' ladies are like, and what if they're not inclined to, like, help us? We walk with aliens on our side and come uninvited into the world. And she's like, that's your problem, not mine. It's like, these are your emperor's finest warriors? Are they not?

Surely they have the mental discipline to discern friend from foe. Oh, I don't like where this is going. It's like, this Black Templar guy is like, they have the mental discipline to remain wary of Zeno's treachery and to suspect those who traffic with such creatures. And you're like, damn, let's not forget that the Black Templars are the CEO of racism. It's true, yeah.

Oh, this is, the foreshadowing feels very strong here. I don't, I don't think this is going to end. Great. Well, who knows? It is called the resurrection of Roebuckieland. True, true. So basically, Abadon is here, and he's just, who is he causing problems? Now, in standard bricky fashion, I'm about to skip a lot of the battles because it's a lot of just logistics and murdering, and it's way better in, you know, hey, let's read the book thing, not a non-a-divis ridiculous episode.

But basically, they met up with this guy, you know? This guy, his name is Marnies Calgar. We didn't talk about Calgar much in the Ultramarines episode because it was mainly a Bobby G episode. But Calgar is mainly known as Papa Smurf. Calgar is the chapter master of the Ultramarines. He is also the dude who got his arm and two of his legs sliced off by the Swarm Lord of Tyrannids.

So Calgar has, I think, fake legs and two gigantic fuck off gauntlets. He is... Could have ended worse. That's pretty cool. For a long time, there was this particular writer who shall remain nameless,

who wrote a bunch of lore for Calgar and the Ultramarines back in the day. And he made them so bonkersly overpowered. It's one of the reasons why people got annoyed with the Ultramarines for a while, because they were written

as the greatest whoever was and could never fail. Oh. And in a sense, If you look at their deeds from a very flat out point of view, yeah, they fuck. They fuck hard, but that's why a lot of people look at Calgar and they're like, nah. He is the leader before Gilliman just recently came back. He was the leader of the ultramarines and people were like, ew, ultimate ultramarine.

Ultra, Ultra, Ultramarine. Oh, no, that's totally something they'd call themselves too. It's like, oh, these are the best ultramarines. What should we name them? Ultra-Utramarines. That's, ugh, sounds like Gilliman would come up with. Hey, Wohme. Sorry, Gilliman's cool, but he goes a little crazy with the ultras. Now, granted him, Marnius Calgar does fuck.

He's got two gauntlets with like bolters attached to them, and he runs around punching things. And it's kind of cool, because he's basically dual-wielding power fists while shooting while punching. And it's pretty neat, and he also has a great image of him on his throne. And he's like covered in drip. The man is just drip kick. Yeah, yeah, you've seen it, right? I remember that one from the Tyrannid episode. So he's arrived, and there's also a couple other characters,

primarily among them all, someone named Chief Librarian Tigurias. Now, Tigerius is another one of those ultramarine characters that you might get annoyed by, but he's actually pretty cool. He is the chief cyker, and he's the only person to have ever stuck his mind into the Tyrannid hive mind and survived. Just barely. But he looks pretty cool.

He's like mega blue wizard. He's got a cool, like, staff and everything. Tigerius is neat. I think he's one of the, I think he's the strongest space marine psycher in the game. Besides like Grey Knight characters. But he's pretty badass. But they meet up with all of them and call is like,

hey, I got this thing. I got, oh, he doesn't, sorry, he doesn't hell everything. He's like, hey, we got to make it to Gilliman's stasis room. And during this entire period of time, there's like jets and, and Abadon's forces and everything's blowing up in the sky, like the whole fucking planets

under siege and it's just going crazy, right? He's giving McCrager run for its money. Which is intense, because this is the Ultramar's home world. World, yeah. This is big. The center. That's the, that's the, it's, you get rid of that, I'm assuming Ultramar falls. Like, it's, it's

over. Maybe not falls. but it's a, it's a blow. Yeah. So he's, everything's going, going mad there. There's all this battling and, okay, and okay, so Calgar and the group led them to the chambers of Gilemon. And they finally got there, and it is a big fucking room. This is a big room, okay? Like, I cannot express the level of how large this room is.

This shrine is laughable. how big this thing is. It is like the height. What's that giant structure in Dubai? Oh, I don't know what it's called. I know what you're talking about, though. I forget that. It's that giant thing in Dubai, everybody.

You know it. I know it. We all know it. I just don't know what the name of the thing is. You know what I'm talking about. It's like that tall. It's like the size of like an airfield. It's enormous.

And it's just decorated. and shrines and imagery and gold and all this crap and sitting there dead in like the way back is Gilliman himself and his eyes are closed and he's got like he's just kind of sitting there

in this big stasis field and he's just being held there the whole time in this nigh indestructible stasis field keeping him you know keeping him there yeah keeping him mostly alive yeah he looks like Stephen Beauty

you know I mean hey man he never lost his looks It's true. He's his stasis. Yeah, he didn't age. And so his nice little baby boy face is like, ooh, how pretty. Ooh.

He's so cute. He's so cute. But they make it there, and then Calgar stops with his giant ultramarine guard after he, you know, they do the bow and everything. And he turns around, he's like, all right, call. I've let you, like, you're the arch megos. I've accepted what you were going with for a while.

But now we're here. Okay, I need, you need to tell me everything you're doing. Okay, like you need to tell me everything you're doing because we don't quite trust you in your weirdness. And you, you come here with, with aliens, and you're carrying this giant vault behind you? And what the fuck? So, call then tells the story. The story of what Gilliman told him 10,000 years ago about they'll want to, you. The two things he needed.

The primary space marines was the one, but the other one was to help save him in the possibility of his death. And for that, behind him, and this thing called the auto reliquary is a suit of armor, known as the armor of fate, which is a fucking kind of cool.

But the armor of fate, when placed on Gilemon, will be able to heal his wounds and bring him back alive. and to this to this everyone was fucking like speechless completely quiet

they listened well they listened hard yeah and this is like their primark and then after that Yvrain stepped forward and spoke and said unfortunately in order to truly be able to revive

Gilliman though his wounds and what he is sustained were what means that they need to have him undergo the cycle of rebirth. So in order for Gilliman to come back alive, he first needs to die. And they took this a lot worse. Oh, I bet they did.

Like, it would like, okay, so it's like, that's, that's a lot of faith. Because they're, they're going to trust the Zenos. They're going to trust an Eldar to be like, oh yeah, just let him die. Don't, don't worry about it. I got this. I don't know about that sister This is our guy

This is the dude Like And you want to kill And you want to kill him Yeah I imagine that Did not go over Super well

Jesus Calgar Well everyone started screaming Calgar Said that he would Like So long as he drew breath No Zenos

Witch would ever lay their hands On the Primark the Grey Knight guy, Volus moved to help Calgar as well. Inquisitor Grafax and the Black Templar also moved on

Calgar's side and was like, fuck that. The only people who were on call side were the Yanari and Celestine. And Celestine was like, Celestine was like, sisters, sisters, please. You know, understand having faith.

This is the will of the emperor indeed. You must have faith that the emperor will have everything work out. And, you know, naturally everyone's like, shut up. Shut the fuck up. This is different. This is like when you get into a car accident and then someone goes to your hospital bed, it's like, it was God's plan. You're like, shut the hell up.

But one person did stand alongside Call as well. And that was this man known as Chief Liberian Tigarius. Tigarius himself, the psycher of the Ultramarines, would also stowed alongside Call, and said to, you know, Calgar, like, hey, trust my counsel as he saw hints of like a major vision. But as people were starting to get crazy and angry, things got really bad. Right at that point, the roof burst the fuck open. And immediately a bunch of raptors came out of... Do you know what Raptors are? I feel like we've talked about Raptors before,

but I just think it's hilarious because when you first said it, I didn't make the connection, and I just thought a bunch of Jurassic Park Raptors came out, and they were like, er! And, like, anyway. That would be incorrect. I hope so. It would be kind of awesome, actually.

Raptors are jetpack troops for chaos. they have giant wing jet fax sick holy shit yeah they're they're super cool and they also talk really weird they talk with a lot of sissing and they're very like they're like a pact

so they're like buzzing flies so the ceiling blew open and a bunch of raptors came down bellowing like smoke out of their backpacks and screeching like condors on their way down and then a whole bunch of Chaos Terminators teleported into the

sanctum and started just opening fire on them. And so then all this discussion kind of stopped. And they're like, oh shit, chaos is here. And they started fighting off the enemies. And Calgar is like blasting away with bolters and he's punching the shit

out of people. The raptors are flying around and all of the sisters are taking fire at them. And Celestein is like flying in the air cleaving raptors in two with their flaming sword. All, all this craziness is occurring. And then just this huge battle breaks out, right?

And then some sorcerers and chaos psychers arrive. And they start like casting incantations. And like Tigerius is fighting them off with his own psychic blast. And they're like doing the Voldemort Harry Potter thing with their psychic powers. And, you know, the Grey Knights are doing their thing. And then more Terminators teleport in. And then say it's just things are going mad, right? And Calgar is.

fan. Shit has come from the fan. The fan is made of shit. Ew. And they're like, they're flying down. Like, everything has gone crazy.

Like, this is, this is the holy sanctum, right? This is, is like the place. The fact that they have breached the Primark's chamber is,

oh, yeah. That is, that hurts. Things are not going well on McCrag, apparently. for the Ultramarines. Yeah.

They kept on coming. The traitor forces kept on coming and they were increasingly outnumbered over and over again. But during this period of time, Inquisitor Grafax was kind of like looking around firing bolters. She's an inquisitor so she can,

she's good, but she's not much compared to Marines. And as she took a bolt shell to the stomach. But it didn't detonate, luckily. So it just like dented her armor and like probably bruised. some ribs and knocked the wind out of her. But as she stood up and looked to her right, she saw something not great.

And it was called furiously shit posting. Like every arm he has is going like he's like he's fucking putting reaction images. He's making Doge Vanjyre jokes. He's on Reddit, Discord, Facebook. He is furiously shit posting.

Every mechandri, every tentacle, every little piece of his fingers, everything. moving at Mach 5 And this is right next to Gilliman's thing And standing right next to him Was your brain patiently waiting And so during this giant battle

Call is like, I don't need your permission D-D-Li-Li-Li-Li-Li which is You know It's funny because it's called but you know So they're just going to go forward And they're just going to release Gilliman Killim, kill him, revive him, no permission.

Fuck this. Things are too crazy. Without Gilliman, we're fucked. Screw your dumb little Zenos bias. This shit's going down. Basically, constantly, like, while the whole thing was raging, call is there, getting his thing ready, getting it set up, getting the armor prepared,

and his Qatari bodyguard are helping him out, fighting off people. Yvrain is like, she only has a sword, but she's dodging bullets, because she's Eldar. She's just like dipping and weaving, like adjusting her head, like moving with this weird gray blur. And she's just dodging bolt shots coming her way

with just like her own nature because that's what Eldar are. Yeah. But multiple attempts, Grafax was like, no. So she kept trying to get to him, but she kept being set back by things like auto cannon blasts and explosions.

And then she was ready to run up to him and say, I order you to stop in the name of the Inquisition, which is actually kind of a big deal. But I think Call would have probably ignored it regardless.

But eventually she got pinned by rubble. Couldn't do so. And then Tigerius was also there standing next to them, like fighting off some chaos sorcerers. In fact, he just said a couple random syllables in his mouth

and three fucking chaos space marines just like imploded in their armor. And just like disintegrate. He was just like hop and gaba-dabazabazze. And he's going, that's a strong guy that's a beefy siker

Tigarius is this nutty guy but when he saw those three souls like just disintegrates Grafax has like a metal eye and since she's a psycher

she noticed that the when the three of them died their like soul kind of remained like an after image like a ghost and then it was sucked in over towards your brain

and she was like Oh no But during the battle Calgar is like Just like furiously fisting people He's running in there like punching marines With his giant gauntlets and blasting around And after one quick turn he looked at the shrine

And he saw a call there Furiously working is like Oh no Oh God And the stasis chamber itself Started to open And Calgar immediately raised his bolters up to go fire at call to stop him from doing what he was doing.

But before he could even get his fist in the air, Yvrain in a blur of motion brought his sword down and shattered all of the cables connecting Gillum into his life support. And Calgar heard his primark sigh his last breath. And it's going to haunt him to the rest of his days seeing his primark's final breath and his final death. And so obviously we know what's what's gonna happen but for Calgar like this is

this is like needing therapy levels yeah yeah this is I'm gonna need to be in therapy for God knows how long after this shit's ever forever every day forever and as that happens the armor started capturing around Gilliman it's like it's like a it's like a tomb goes over him and then it pulls out and then he has his armor on basically. But right when this happened, Calgar then be... It turned into basically the...

It turned into that scene in Infinity War when they're fighting off the weird dog things and everyone's starting to get fucked up until Thor arrives. Basically, it was that scene. Calgar started becoming overwhelmed by the Terminators. The Raptors started murdering down the ultramarines as they were getting killed by tanks. Valdus was like 1v-fiving other cykers

and wasn't really... able to handle them. Yvrain and the Vizark were battling corn berserkers. Call was firing bolts of energy and using this binaic chance to upgrade people's weapons. More Grey Knights arrived and then

in the sky came ten separate drop pods. Chaos drop pods. Oh! And they blasted through the shrine and landed in the ground. And each tripod holds 10

Marines and so a hundred Marines strode into the into the fucking room Oh geez that's no good That's a lot of that's a lot of no moss Both of Celestein's bodyguards Were down one had a hole blasted In her from a plasma bolt

And the other one was just like Frel in the ground Selestine was fighting one Handed because her left arm was broken In like seven places Like everything Everything is going down like mad And at this point Like she was still singing

prayers, by the way. The entire time she was saying prayers, because of course she fucking was. Well, what else would she be doing, right? Of course she would. Like, the defenders of this room were basically had minutes before they were done, before they were all dead. And right there, right then, calls reliquary clicked green, and it opened. And Gilliman there stood with this brand new suit of armor, completely awake. The armor of fate, a completely awake. and aware, looking in front of him with this, this fucking

face, this horrifyingly angry face that even the ultramarines in the room got scared by it. And it's pretty cheesy, but the room went into like dead silence. Like, everyone stopped fighting. And they all...

It's meant for dramatic effect. Of course, of course. And they all kind of look towards the, you know, Gilliman standing there. holding the sword of his father. Gilemon has the emperor's flaming sword itself. Like, oh, does he? Uh-huh.

All those pictures of Gilliman you see with his flaming sword, that's Big E's sword. That is the sword. I never made that connection somehow. That's a, that's a big deal. That's a real big deal. It does a big deal, yeah. So the silence was.

finally broken when a corn berserker screamed and threw himself at Gilman, because of course it's corn. And with one motion, he flung his sword in the air and split the soldier from fucking gooch to skull. And then he just fell into flat two pieces and sloshed on the ground. And then the fighting really began. Celestine looked at him and saw the son of the Holy Emperor himself. And at that moment, she was like, like, yes. Everyone who died is no longer a fallen soldier. They're a martyr.

This turned from a defeat to a history book battle. Her arm, like, fucking healed itself. She rose her two bodyguards from the dead because she's so invigored by this power. And then she just went to fucking town. And, like, and then Gilliman, I'm going to remember. read you this part from the wiki verbatim.

All right. Okay, okay. As he crashed into the front ranks of black legionaries, Gilliman let out a building roar of pure undiluted fury. The Primark's first blow through a black legionary high into the air,

blood streaming from behind the corpse in a red trail. His second strike smashed a traitor Terminator into a bronze and marble column with enough force to drive the chaos worshipper clean from his armor and out the other side. A spiked fist swung for Gilliman's chest only to be lopped from its well-wielder's arm before the blow could land.

Gilliman's return swing parted its attacker's head from its shoulders, cauterizing the stump of the traitor's neck as the body crumbled to the floor. On it went. The Primark moving with such speed that even the heretic's superhuman reactions couldn't save them. None could match Gilliman. None could come even close. And the few opponents that landed Lucky Blows found their weapons turned aside by the Primark's masterwork armor.

The man the man just fucked up everybody. And of course all the ultramarines and you know them they saw this Gilamon

is a son of the emperor is alive and they're like they're losing their minds and how like you know they're stoked that's a good way to make them fight harder.

Oh God yeah you see Gilliman just fucking going to town. Not only is he's super strong in turning the tie to battle, but like, just fucking Gilliman. This is Primark. Son of an emperor.

Let's go, right? If that doesn't get your blood pumping for a fight and really get down, like, check your pulse, you're already dead. Like, it was absolutely, like, nuts to see him just go to town. Like I said, it's very much like that Thor part in, in Vindy War, where he just starts beating everybody. turns the tide completely. But I also like this one part right before he was fixed.

Calgar was like, no, I like to go ahead. I command you to stop in the emperor's name. Like brother Tigris stopped them. And Tigerius is standing there. And he just looks like, do it, you're afraid. And may the emperor condemn me if you played me false Zenos. I kind of like that part where he is like, do it anyway, but I swear to God. If you're lying.

It caused so many issues But it's kind of cool because like Celesteine is like going to town And you can see some cool things with Grafax Where Greyfax is like I aired and I shall do penance You are truly an instrument of the Or the Emperor's Will

And Grafax is like Vigilance is not a sin Grafax. You serve him as surely as I do Hmm let's serve together as warriors of faith You know that I'm surprised there's not that many lesbian jokes About the two of them Because they really act like it

they they are great facts has such as like a what's the term the sundari is that what's called um yeah where it's like oh I know I don't I didn't do it because I like you or anything yeah she's got a lot of that energy when it comes to Celestine

there's a lot of that energy I'm surprised there isn't more of it um check 34 to 9 I know it'll get there all right Chai that's our next poster okay Patreon.com slash you have to this next poster confirmed

it's good so in a nice interesting so obviously the battle is turned they still had to deal with the entire force fighting an Ultramar in general but as the battle started to continue to rage Gilamim being

the fantastic charismatic leader that he is went to the various posts of like Calgar and a few of the other people and humbly asked them to turn their control over to him. Like he didn't take command. He was like, he was like,

chapter master Calgar, may I please assume your position in command of the Ultramar campaign? Which is as of, I mean, obviously he wants it regardless, but just the word saying it, instead of being like, I now take command of this engagement.

You know, he's like, may I please have the thing? Obviously they're going to fucking say yes. Of course. Like, he didn't even need to really ask. He could just be like, yep, mine now. And it's like, yeah, sure.

Go ahead. Well, I'm not going to lob you. It's very humbling. Yeah. But during this period of time, Gilliman, in his mind, is like, I will ask no questions. I will keep it all in the back of my mind.

He literally fell asleep, attacking Fulgram, and woke up here in like a nanosecond. He doesn't know. He didn't remember anything. So he simply did, okay, orders, assess damage, finish the war. Not any of this.

Like, what happened? Where am I? get it done done first because that's the most important part but after enough time they obviously drove back

the invaders they dealt with the forces abadon did not take ultramar all this stuff and so now it was time for Gilliman to truly

question oh yeah now now it's time now he can look around and be like hey wait a minute things are a little different to what I

what the fuck happened here because oh boy Gilliman and current Imperium I don't think he's going to be a happy boy No It would not It's not going to be what I would like to call A Good Time

That's one way to put it But The all of the Obviously all the discussions he had He took in with all of the people In the Celestinian Crusade He spoke with all of them He asked

He asked basically, basically everyone around, Calgar and stuff, and he constantly changed his emotions to whatever would make the person telling him feel more comfortable, which was actually kind of neat. Like him himself were obviously, like, you know, physically it didn't feel very good, waking up again at this point. But he spent days and days in conversation. And he used every like statesman, like, what was I say? Statesman's guile to set everyone he spoke to.

to ease to tease them from the information as much as he could and to hide his reaction. But every single revelation, like, struck him so hard, like a knife to the gut. Yeah. He was so exhausted from this alone. And he said, like, you know, he said by himself and his own, with no one around him, he said to himself with his hands, or his head in his hands, like, millennia's past thousands of years. And look what has become of them. of us, idolatry, ignorance, suffering and squalor in the name of a God who never desired the title. Then he says, we failed, father.

You failed your sons, and we in our turn failed you. And now to compound our arrogance and vain glory, we have failed all of them too. Did Horace not say that you sought godhood? He built a rebellion upon that claim. How would he gloat to see the Imperium now? and then he makes his, why do I still live just to suffer?

Jeez. I never thought about how Horace would be like ha, told you, gotcha, told you, told you, this is going to happen, you fucking loser. I never thought about that though, but yeah,

I, Gilliman's probably not very happy. He has ultra depression. Oh, I bet he do. Like, you know that, you know that image that we always keep talking about where Celestine's putting on the thing on his head. That's a call it, like you can call on Iron Halo.

An Iron Halo is a force field generator. But Celestine considers it a worthy holy symbol of the emperor. And so he's sitting there in his throne, surrounded by Call, who is just the weirdest person alive. Celestine, who's a demon, aliens, and they're putting on, they're like adding a force field generator that they think is a holy symbol to my back. Oh, man. Is so depressed. Man's going to need so much Zoloft. Every, like, everything with that scene is probably just infuriating him.

There's nothing right to him. It's just, this is all wrong. Nothing is, like, so how, what does Gilman do moving forward? Well, it's weird. That gets into a little bit more of a, like, a lot more of the conversation of how do you change the Imperium? Because he's a Lord Commander of the Emperor. Imperium now. Like he he leads the Imperium at this point in time.

Not in the story, but like in modern day of Warhammer lore. Makes sense. But he, yeah, the first thing he wanted to do was tear down the ecclesiarchy. Tear down the religious organizations, rip the church apart, do this whole thing. But not only would that one, have all of them think he was corrupted or something? It was Zenos that brought him back. And two, probably isn't the good at best idea in general. general, because if you destroy that industry,

destroy that whole part of the Imperium, you might leave yourself massively undefended. And let's not forget Celestine and the sisters. Like, we kind of need this. Like, the religious zealotry is the only thing he, is the spit and the glue

keeping the Imperium alive. Oh, man. So even though he, even though Gilliman knows it's wrong, knows it isn't what the emperor wanted, and he wants to it down. He has to leave it. He has to live with it. He has to back it because without it, the Imperium is fucked.

Kind of basically. It's the only thing holding them together right now. And if he wants to fix it or change it, he's going to need to wait a little longer. Oh, man. That sucks for him. It really does. It really does. But now, but we need to talk about the meme now. The meme. The meme. Oh, that's right. Him and his big titty goth wifu. I'm going to read the conversation to you verbatim if you don't mind.

Do it. So Yvrain is going to leave now. This is the time when the Yannari are going to depart after a certain time. Yvran, the Vizark, and Gilliman are together in a room. And he's pretty, most people wouldn't even consider that because aliens. But, you know, it's Gilliman. He's terrifying. Yvraine says it'll be a long and dangerous journey.

The galaxy grows darker by the day. Have a care, Primark. You may have cheated death once, but you are not invincible. And Giliman nodded and said, Can I say nothing that will convince you to join us on our road? I have come to value the strength of you and your warriors greatly the past few weeks. And your brain says, you cannot. Already we have given you the gift of rebirth,

not to mention a number of our people's lives. Is that not enough? It is a debt, I'm sure, won't be forgotten. Before you depart, tell me this. Call may have fashioned the armor that I wear, but it was not him alone who ensured my resurrection, was it? Your Vrain smiled and said, It's acknowledged you would have healed your physical wounds, Rebutte,

but you and I know that the worst damage has been done to your soul. So no, Primark, it is by the grace of your need that you stand once more amongst the living. If you wish to remain, however, I would caution you against removing your warplate. Not that you could easily do so. And I could press you, Gilman says, I could press you for greater insight into the powers that brought me back and assurances against any taint in their nature. And then the two of them kind of stiffen their postures at that statement.

But I suspect that our newfound understanding is more of more value to my father's realm than my own satisfaction, and that those answers would not come easily. And your brain kind of inclined your head, and the Vizark took his hand off of his blade that he kind of put it on there for a moment. Yep. Thus instead, I shall simply wish you a victory. in your ongoing battles against our mortal foes.

A mutual foes, sorry. May you walk with fortune, Rabutei Gilliamim, and I know that we will stand together in battle again before whatever befalls us. And then murmuring to himself as they leave, he says, no doubt we will, as long as it serves your needs. That's it.

That's all the meme. That's all they got. There's nothing else. There's nothing else. There's nothing. It's just a respectful conversation Yeah, I was gonna say Like at some, like, there's gotta be something after

Where like, you know, she winks at him or there's something But that just seems like, oh yeah, thanks for reviving me Yeah, no problem Are we cool? Yeah, we cool. That's it. That's it. That's it seems it's just a respectful conversation

It's like, hey, thanks for the life. Yeah, no problem. I'm out. There is nothing else to this. Gilliam and Euphrain shipping. The only reason is because, okay, in fairness, compared to what other Marines would do to what they would say to Eldar, I suppose this is the equivalent of basically having sex, considering how much the rest of the Imperium fucking despises them.

I get that part of it, but there's nothing. They can't even do anything. The power armor literally can't be taken off. I just saw the meme that Chai posted. It says, sorry elf girl, but the power armor stays on during sex. Because literally, I can't take the fucking thing off. There's nothing to this. This is just a conversation.

So they just got shit because Gilemon is a guy, and Yvrain is a hot elf. Who helps save him. Who helps save him, and they don't want to kill each other. Anyway, that is the revival of Giliman. That was a trip. It's a pretty cool battle, man. Yeah, it is.

That battle inside of his, like, little shrine where he was in stasis. Oh, my God. That's some endgame shit. I'm got to be honest, I'm kind of glad that we're done with this. Well, I do like the long story, like multiple episodes story-based things. I'm kind of excited to go back to a classic old, you know, just a good old, wonderful, let's talk about ex-Legion or X-Faction, you know? I would ask you what we're going to do next, but I know you're not going to tell me.

You're a smart man. Mm-hmm. You want to take us home then? Yes, sir. Thank you, everyone, for watching and listening to Them's Ridiculous. Thank you very much for joining us in this crazy journey of the last five episodes. It has been quite a while and it has been quite a little tough for me sometimes figuring all this stuff out, but I hope I did decently well on some of them.

If anything, at least the KD1, because that was fun. You can find me... From a newbie perspective, you did very well. I learned a lot, so fantastic job. Before you do the... Yeah, yeah. My name is Bricky. You can find me Bricky everywhere, DK.

DK. Diamonds everywhere, Twitter, Twitch, YouTube, and I just don't talk by Instagram. That sounds perfect to me. And shy, you can find shy at quite shallow or quite shy, either of those places. We will see you next week for whatever episode, but we will also see you again this week for the book club episodes. Oh, Infinite and Divine. Let's go. Let's go. All right.

Bye.