Adeptus Ridiculous - THE SIEGE OF VRAKS: THE LAST ENEMY TO BE DESTROYED | Warhammer 40k Lore

Episode Date: September 6, 2023

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Welcome, everyone, to another episode of the Adeptus Ridiculous Podcast. My name is D.K. Diamante's. His name is Bricky. And finally, the Siege of Rax, I assume, is coming to an end today. But before we get into that, if you enjoy today's podcast, and maybe you want to support us, head over to patreon.com slash Adeptus Ridiculous, where you can get access to the Discord, bloopers if they happen. The $15 tier will get you all the HD posters you can shake a stick at. even the newest one, the night of morning, which is just it's so, so good. Patreon.com slash adeptus, ridiculous. Bricky, take them away.

And if you'd like to buy any of these new posters, including the amazing ones, just dropped, you can head over to Orchate.com. Also, also, we, oh, I already said also. We have new merch. There is a brand new shirt and hoodie combo available on the store. It's just a little siege. Look at him.

Look at his mask. Look at the artillery. He's just doing a little siege. It's just a little siege. It's not a big siege. Well, that, well, see, okay, siege of racks is quite a large siege. It's a large siege. But to us, and this, for this image, this merch, it is just a little siege.

It's just a little siege. Just a little siege. Look at him. Grab it while you can at Orchidate.com. Link in the description. It's right there. Check it out. It's just a little siege.

I don't know. What is it? Is it the Imperial Fist fans that might get a little mad that they're not featured in the Just a Little Siege? Oh, you made so many Imperial Fist fans so upset right now. Oh, I love it. I love it. No, because you got it wrong. Oh, shit.

Is it the other way around? Oh no. Seaging his iron warriors. Oh no, they fortify. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, I'm canceling you.

Oh, no. Oh, man, I love this job so much, too, and that's going to get me fired. Oh, don't lie. That's fair. I've done way stupider things than that. Oh, that's not what I meant. I love this job. Don't lie to me, D.K.

What are you talking about? This is the best thing that's ever happened to me. Well, that's true. I mean, my life has been pretty sad up until this point, so it's not like a high bar. But anyway, so Siege of Rax, huh? Siege of Rax. I love unnecessary self-loathing. Speaking of self-loathing, let's talk about Rax.

Yeah, let's do it. All right. This is the last episode of the Siege of Vrax. And this is just the great point where it's like, hey, guys, what if we just went from this initial funny army because we started so small. Just this little coo

Cardinal. Just a little coo. Just a little coo. Just a little coo. And you got Doge Van Dyer on that. Yeah, I was thinking Doge. Yeah. We can bring the boy back because we haven't done any

Doge Van Dyer stuff in a while. Oh man, we are. We are firing on all cylinders today, baby. He's got to have like really big, like, poorly drawn feet. Anyway, it's starting. off with there and then it's like, okay, time to take this armory world. And now we're going to end with just apocalyptic proportions of ludicy. Mm-hmm.

Everybody's here now, right? There's Astardis. There's chaos. There's Titans. There's Bainblades. There's naval battles. This is the Super Smash Bros of sieges. There's Grey Knights now, too.

Oh, that's right. The Inquisition and the Grey Knights are here now, too. so this planet is going to get scorched earth. So good old, there's an inquisitor. His name is Inquisitor Hector Rex. He is of the Ordo Malius. Which stand for? Um...

What does the Malius stand for? What does Ordomalius do? What's their stick? They go after those heretics. That's what they do. Inquisition don't like those heretics at all. they want to kill them. Do you think the Ordo Hereticus might be those?

Yes, I do. I definitely do, but I couldn't remember what the Malias do, so I kind of thought they all just fell under the same banner of wanting to kill Heretics, so I just went for a long shot. Of course they'd go for demons. It's Grey Knights, my God. Of course they'd go after. We talked about them being, okay, wait, what does the Ordo Zenos do, huh?

I would assume they'd go after aliens and Zenos. I would assume that. Yeah, I am. All right, well, okay. So, Inquisitor Hector Rex of the Ordo. So what is a, what is a, what is the technical term for a space marine decay? What did they call? The Astardis?

All right, good. We're, all right. He's on track. Oh, man. It's another one of those. It's another one of those days. It's another one of those days. So Inquisitor, Lord Hector Rex is scrying.

So much like, I hate to say this, but much like the Eldar, the Grey Knights really like to scry the future. They like to scribe. They use like the Emperor's Tarot, which is like a deck of, I'm pretty positive. Shai, correct me on this. The Emperor's tarot is literally like a deck of tarot cards that they use to scry the future psychically, right? Do they really use a deck of tarot cards? to scribe the future?

The Emperor's tarot is what it's called. Oh, sorry. Does the Emperor also have a crystal ball that he can see the future with? Yeah, it's just called the Golden Throne. Well, true. I guess that is one giant. It's true, true. Does he have a Ouija board, too,

that he can talk to dead people with? Is it the Emperor's Ouija board? Is that a thing, too? Well, we do have psychers. They literally, like, yeah, yeah, there's psychoreactive cards. So when a psycher uses them, he can like scry the future, kind of. And basically he's like, hey, Vrax, demons.

It's happening. Demons. It is happening right now. Out of curiosity, has anyone ever made a deck of like emperor tarot cards? Like just a fan thing? Because, I don't know. Like, whenever someone tells tarot cards, they also have like really cool art on them. They're like those really long, thin cards.

So I am more than. positive the answer there is yes. I looked it up right now and I'm already seeing large amounts of them on Etsy. I imagine those would look so cool. Like, you know. Specifically though, there were actually

a bunch of them that were showed off during the arcs of Omen. Oh, really? Yeah, because it was like, hey, they were scrying to talk about that. So if you look at this image, these were some of the decks that, the cards that were shown. Notice there's the

the Silver Key Abidon up there Personally Those are so cool Oh dude the God Emperor one The right Second row Far right

Looks so cool Oh yeah Those look I love the artwork on like Tarot cards I don't care about tarot cards Like using them But man the art is so good

That's great Anyway All things aside The So he arrives Inquisitor Hector Rex arrives and he goes to talk to the new Lord Commander. And naturally, Lord Commander's like, there are 40,000 people who need to speak to me right now, but an Inquisitor is asking for me. So fuck all of you.

I'm talking to him. Yeah. Inquisitor always takes presidents over, you know, the Normie common man. And basically he was saying, demons are coming to Vrax. I am now going to take control of this fighting force. So, Rip Bozo, brand new commander that replaced the old commander already replaced by an Inquisition leader. Okay.

So this is the third new leader of this siege. All right. Okay. Inquisitor Hector Rex is now controlling this siege. And they are taking some Grey Knights as well as Marines from the Red Talons chapter to reinforce the situation. The Red Talon chapter is very, very important. and you'll learn a lot about them, I promise. Okay, I was about to say, what is with all these chapters that I've never heard of?

Last time it was the Red Scorpions, this time it's the Red Talens. Where are they all coming from? Well, apparently Red. Yeah, Red, that's what, they're not related. They're not like, you know, sub-branches of the same chapter, are they? Because Red, Scorpion, Red Talon, they're separate entities, right? But we don't know where the red scorpions came from. Oh, that's right.

Wait, wait, no, not red talents. Isn't it, wait, isn't it red hunters? I think I screwed that up. I think it's Red Hunters. Oh, okay. Yeah, it's Red Hunters, not Red Talons. Red Hunter sounds way cooler, actually. I must have been reading something and then just typed it in.

Glad to see my brain is not the only one not working today. What was our motto? Entertainment before accuracy. And boy, do we live by it. That is creed and motto for a reason. Creed. Creed. Anyway, so they took it over.

They come to reinforce it. He saw, he read the Emperor's Terror card, saw demonic forces with the chaos arriving, invoked his inquisitorial mandate. And, you know, if you're not like a demon person,

because, you know, demons are kind of kept secret from the wider Imperium. You may not have noticed the signs of it. The sky was getting worse. it was darkening, getting a bit more red as well. And a few of the Kriegsmen and the dead chaos worshippers in No Man's Land were just kind of starting to walk around. Like all eerie and creepy. It's like, okay, all right, this is, there's some problems going on.

Yeah, I assume once that started happening, it was like, uh-oh. Because before that, it's just like, oh, it's kind of stormy today. Oh, okay, whatever. But yeah, once the dead start walking around, you know, you might. might think that something is amiss. Also, Shai said Red Hunters might be friendly with the Inquisition and show their little side paldron. And, yeah, I think maybe they might have some friendly ties with the Inquisition.

Maybe. Could it be the inquisitorial eye on the skull, for chance? You know, I was thinking that that might have something to do with it. But I wasn't 100% sure, you know. Well, at this point, the next amazing. offensive came, and the goal was the encircling of the Citadel. They broke through the second line, but they wanted to surround them, so they had nowhere to escape, nowhere they could hide off to. And as you can see, the blue line right there to try to really kind of get around it

and encircle the whole area, and then, of course, shell it to oblivion. Right. So they, so they've actually pushed past the stuff that they lost in the last episode? they got a foot hold on the second line but they weren't able to expand the foot hold. Oh, okay, got you. Right. So it's like you got a foot in the door, but you can't open the door. Yeah, right. For some reason, I thought that they had actually been pushed back from the second line.

Okay, so they've still got their foothold, but now they can actually advance with all this extra help. Exactly. Okay, got you. So, as they encircled them, the main first defensive is, you. is, as they want to encircle them, sorry. They have to go through an area called the green hell. And you guess who they're fighting in the green hell? And the green hell.

Would that have anything to do with the Death Knights and Nergel? Death Knights? Or the... What the hell are they called? Deathguard. It's one of those days. Yeah, it's one of those days. It's okay.

I would patch you on the back right now if I could, but... I don't know why I thought they were dead. Death Knights and not Death Guard. But look, look, look, look, I knew it was Nergel. Huh? You're right, green. I'm proud. Green?

I knew it was Nergel? So, they... Neurons are firing. They're firing. So they have to make their way against Nergel. And let's be honest, this is goddamn difficult. Because Nergel is just so gosh darn tanky. And also, the death guard are...

I almost said Death Knights. The death guard are... are reinforcing the positions, and this place is crawling with nerglings, plague bearers, but most importantly, and the biggest difficulty, is a gigantic, great, unclean one that has joined the battle. Oh, no, that sucks. That's no good. Don't like that. He's got an awful name, too. It's like scabitracks or something. That's so fitting of a great unclean one though He's this

He's classic great and clean one Like he's big and joyous And he's just kind of like brown bounding around Like la da da da da on the battlefield everywhere He stepped the ground would just turn into like a sickly black And his boils and shit would burst And little nerglings would fly out of them and start Oh man I hate that imagery

The one that it specifically said that was so awful is he would walk up to like the craters left by the artillery barrages, and he just go like, and just puk into them to fill them up so all of his nerglings could jump in there and like bathe and have a good time. Oh, I hate it. Oh, I hate the thought of a vomit jacuzzi for nerglings. And they're like so happy about it. Like, woo-hoo, thanks, Dad.

I hate it. Oh, boy, that is a not pleasant image. Imagine the smell. Oh, God, yeah. The smell doesn't kill you everything in the air, will. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So, good old

Kriegman fight these guys. Doesn't look too great. Things aren't going super hot. There's some difficulties. One of the Inquisitors, not Mr. Hector Rex, fights the big nergling, or a grand clean one,

and the Grand Clee one. She's kind of like, Hey, hey, little man. Come on. Come on over here. Go, wham! and they just fucking kills him. Oh, okay.

Yeah, sure. Wow. But it's pretty gross, pretty ridiculous. They actually end up taking out the great unclean one and dealing with the nerglings by having a whole bunch of gray knights teleport to the surface, including a big brother captain, guy named brother captain Stern, shanks the gray and clean one in the chest, psychic power, all the yield. Oh, okay. So they just started to talk. Yeah, yeah. I just wanted to talk about the gray and clean.

Cleveland because he's kind of funny, but... They make their way through. Deal with the dang... Deal with the dang nergling. Get through it. All's good. Oh, wow. So they make it through the green hell with the help of the Grey Knights, huh?

Yeah, pretty classic. Oh, okay. I thought it would be harder than that, but all right. I'm underselling it. It was very hard, but it's not worth going into every parian blow and strike that's done during the battle. You know there's going to be a comment that's like, but Bricky! D.K.

I want to go on record that you hate our fans, and you think they all sound like that, and I'm canceling you immediately. Wait a minute. Not everyone, but you know there's going to be at least one. Dude, this is the fourth episode of me abridgingly abridged version. I'm sure they're okay.

Oh, fine. Sorry. But shy is right. When you use gray knights with a gigantic halberd, and then you stab, with Gray and Cleveland one in the chest. Like, yeah, this is worst case scenario thing. This is, like, gray nights are a worst case.

I'm not going to sugarcoat it. Yeah, I guess if the Grey Knights are showing up, it's, it's not a good time. It is a very bad situation. Yeah. But regardless, Green Hell is done. Circle is starting to be closed around the Citadel now. But during this, and unknown to the Imperials, there's some drama going on inside the Citadel.

Oh, no. There's this guy. His name is Zufor, Z-H-U-F-O-R, Z-F-O-R, Z-F-R. Wow. He is the Lord of the Skull-Takers War Band, and he is really upset with how this is going right now. He's also like a lower lieutenant of Abadon, so he's kind of an important boy. Oh, yeah.

He would, yeah, they would be a little upset that, uh, why are they pushing? What the, why, why haven't we annihilated them yet? Well, he wants the war to continue for as long as possible. so he can claim more skulls for corn, naturally. So he starts staging a coup. He challenges the other leader of a Zerker war ban. They strip to their undies with chain axes and duel, because that's pretty classic corn stuff.

Yeah, yeah. He wins, takes that over, allows, starts working with another group called the Sanctified, which is hilarious that they're called that, because they're actually chaos. Yeah, I was going to say. a strange name for chaos to have. Cuts a deal with them. Like, hey guys, you like making a bunch of rituals and stuff.

You let me lead you and everything. And I'll bring you like 10,000 souls and I'll let you use that to make more sacrifices. Like, okay. And then Lord Arcos of the Alpha Legion kind of works with him to overtake the Cardinal. They take the Cardinal. They throw them into a dungeon. they force out Deacon Maimon, which actually turns into a gigantic Nergel demon. Oh, okay.

Which is, that's his benefit. Deacon Maimon, the guy who twisted everything from the start, went to Nergel, and it was like, you know what, buddy? You turn Vrax into, like, the most pestilent place ever. You can be a demon, and there he is. Ooh, he's gross. Rose. That is...

Look at his feet. Those feet. Oh, thanks for pointing out his feet. Look at how big those toes are, my guy. Glad to know where your priorities lie. It's not the three-barrel-arm sludge cannons. It's not the crazy horn or anything. No, no.

Bricky's like, but look at those toes. I'm glad I haven't had breakfast yet. But Yeah, but But Um Regardless of all that He basically shoved the deacon

Or sorry, the deacon became his own little Nergel demon prince He shoved the cardinal away And took over the overall Vrocks offensive Butchered most of his followers And is like, my turn Oh boy It just gets

It goes from bad to worse. And it's about to get a little more worse, because next up comes the Battle of Hangman's Hill. Oh, wow. What the naming schemes are just, man, this sounds like the most amazing vacation spot ever. Check out the green hell. Check out Hangman's, what was it? Hangman's Hill. Oyo, yo, yo.

Jeez. Shy, don't tell him about the Battle of the Murr. Slopes that's coming soon. Oh my God, please. I don't even think you're joking. Oh, yeah, no, it's actually the name of the place. Of course it is. Of course it is.

Yeah, after you're done, checking out hangman's hill, take a ride down the murder slopes. Great. So if you look at the map above, you'll notice that the Citadel itself is one thing and the surrounding that they're doing is the other. But you could see a ton of like cracked and almost maze-like platelets.

toes and ravines that exist going towards the Citadel. And that's basically the murder slopes, is going down in there to get to the Citadel. Oh, okay. This is actually ran by our old boy from episode two, which was good old Captain Tyborg, that baller dude who got injured like 15 times. Oh, wow, he's still alive even. He can still move. He's not like in a hospital somewhere getting all of his limbs.

reattached. So he's been injured an additional four times over the course of Vrax. He has had one of his arms chains sorted off replaced with biotics. But in typical Kreeksman fashion, he is now a colonel. He is Colonel Tyborg. Sure.

Sure. After what he did, he should be. Fair. If he's still kicking and still moving and still fighting, yeah, hell yeah, he should be a colonel. Think of it like this. He's been on Vrax for 14 years. Oh my God. He is a veteran while never leaving one planet.

Wow. Although the Krieg probably just love him, he must be like just, oh, I wish my career was like that. I mean, he is, I mean, he's a colonel, so he's got his, he's got his priorities straight. I was going to say, he's like the epitome of Krieg. So with Mr. Krieg man there, and Colonel Tyborg, he made his, that's a good point, shy is kind of right. I don't think that Creasman really care about career. True, but they'd probably want to be like him.

He seems like he's sort of the ideal creg that's like, oh, I'm not giving up on this until you have to kill me to get me to give up on this siege or whatever. Oh, sure. I mean, that's like just guard mentality in general. I don't think the Krieger like, oh, man, if only I could be a colonel. Oh, man, I can't wait to rise in the rings. They're just like, I can't wait to die for the emperor. Yeah, pretty much. Yeah, yeah.

Anyway, Lord Inquisitor Rex launched an assault on Hangman's Hill, which was to disable their defense laser batteries around Vrax, which took a damn long time after three failed attacks. But once those defense batteries were taken, finally the Citadel of Vrax was directly visible to everybody. But despite this, things got worse. the High Lord of Terra are the High Lord of Terra can be bizarre individuals but specifically

it would appear that rivals of Hector Rex in the Inquisition specifically the Ordo Hereticus were not overly stoked about how him taking over this battle

so the High Lord's Tera taking away a good portion of his 88th siege regiment for other battles. Withdraw about a dozen regiments as a direct decree. And Rex is like, God damn it. So he sent a whole bunch of inquisitorial envoys to Terra to partition the ecclesiarchal. No, not the ecclesiarchal, the inquisitorial representative, one of the 12 high lords, and say,

can you undo this, please? and so they, it's good God, it's kind of funny how they described this, like the inquisitorial representative has their chambers and outside their chambers are people waiting to meet with them for like days. So they basically stood in line, waited, partitioned them,

and their response was probably not, sorry. Oh, that's unfortunate. So essentially, trying to get to talk to them was like queuing up for Wayfinding. on early access release. You wait for days and then you don't really get anything. Yes.

Okay, cool, cool, cool, glad we're understanding each other. Cool, cool, cool. There was a certain part of Inquisitor Rex who was like, if I lose these regiments, like the battle for VRAX is going to be that much more difficult. This is a major important battle. Like, I could defy these orders, keep these men for this situation.

But... Well, I mean, when you think about it, people who thought they had the better ideas are what is what caused VRAX in the first place. Oh, that's true. You know, people who think they know better are at best, what you'd call traitors. I suppose that's true. That's how this whole, oh, I know better. Oh, no, I know what the Imperium will.

Oh, no, I know what the Emperor wants, and then it becomes, oh, the Emperor has no idea. oh, the Imperium are the bad guys. Why are we turning into chaos demons now? And I guess that's fair. So he specifically decided, no, we'll continue with what we have. And his inquisitorial representatives that went to go partition them were found all dead on their path back to him, killed by an assassin's phase blade, which was kind of a little bit of like, hey, we tested what you, we tested what you, we, we, we tested. tested your loyalty and you've passed. Good job. All right. There won't be a problem. That being

said, good luck. Oh, wow. Oh, God, that's so petty. Oh, geez. All because they just didn't like the fact that he had taken control and he was apparently doing well and they just didn't like him, I guess. Is that what I'm understanding? Is just the high lords of terror just became very, very petty? Not the high lords. The Ordo Hereticus. Oh, right, right, right. We petition the high lords to change it up. Right. Okay, got you. It's classic inquisition in fighting.

Yep. Oh, that is... We love when the biggest threat to the Imperium is the Imperium. Itself. I was going to say, the biggest threat to the Imperium is indeed the Imperium itself. Oh, man. With all of that, it begins the next fight for good old the murder slopes. and the murder slopes is basically getting down to the Citadel of Rax for the final offensive.

They've been shelling it for a while now, and they're trying to break apart the void shields, because of course, protect them by big void shields. Sure, sure, it's 40K. But with that, they make their way through, blasting it, blasting it, sending enemies and people down the murder slopes, all kinds of different kinds of stuff. I see lots of murder happening on the murder slopes. Seven day battle. Love it. Love to see it.

We're talking Titans are added. All kinds of jazz. It's all kinds of shenanigans. And then it's like, you know what? Those Red Hunters, those Inquisition guys that I mentioned earlier, it's time for you to start. And so they shell the place, break the void shield, start breaking into the buildings themselves with their artillery, send in the troops, and then, drop 150 Astardis in drop pods directly on them. That is a considerable force of Astardis.

Damn. And just like classic Alpha Legion stuff, the Alpha Legion is like, yeah, I definitely expected this. And they killed all of them. Wow, really? All 150 Red Hunters? They're dead? They're all dead.

They're all dead? Wow, my team is dead. They're all dead. So was the Alpha Legion just like waiting and they had like all these traps ready? And they just had like, how did they kill 150 of them? They literally, that's right. The place where they would die was called the death pit. Alpha Legion prepped this.

The Alpha Legion knew what was going on. They knew what the plan was. Like, all right, Krieg offensive artillery shelling and then drop pods. And they drop podded. And as soon as they busted out of the drop pods, they just collapsed on them and murdered them because the Kriegsman couldn't reinforce them in time because of, oh, I don't know, the blood sky and the classic VRAX atmospheric problems. Yeah, wow, that's crazy.

150 Astarnies just wiped out. Is that why that we don't hear about the Red Hunters anymore? Because they all died? Well, not all of them die, but 150 of them died. Yeah, that's a good chunk of Astardis. That's no small thing. Yeah, not at all. But it is, it is certainly, that's why I was joking earlier.

It's like, this is a really important Astardis faction. Like, no, they literally just land and die. Landed and just wiped out. Jesus. Well done, Alpha Legion, though. Golf clap for them, because that's, hey, that's a big deal. It is. So as they battle their way down through the Citadel of VRAX,

it comes to the battle of St. Leonis Gate. And then let me just say, like, I am paraphrasing. Yeah, St. Leonis Gate. It's not like the assassination gate. It's not the murder blood gate. It's not the you're about to die gate. It's just St. Leonis's gate. Really?

Wasn't Frax, like, the home of like a famous saint called St. Leonis? And that was kind of the whole point why they picked that. in the beginning. It's just everything else. That's such an awful, disgusting death riddled name. It's just like, oh, by the way, St. Leonis's Gate.

Oh, cool. I think it's because the Kriegsmen have been naming it for the battles. Okay. Okay, that makes sense. If these are all Krieg names up until this point, okay, cool, cool. I would believe so.

But as they make their way to this gate, I mean, like I said, I'm paraphrasing a lot of this stuff because it's like, Yeah. It's like a whole planet of just how the battle happened. Mm-hmm. Okay.

And, well, sorry, actually, there's this, before the St. Leonis's Gate, they did all of that attacking of the Alpha Legion. The Red Hunters got butcher. And then Inquisitor Rex is like, all right, screw it. Let's do the World War II style. And he grabbed 68 bombers and was just like, all right, carpet the place. Wow. I mean, hey, that'll probably do it. Carpet the place and then shell the place and then send in the Grey Knights with the Krieg troops, make their way forward, get to the gate.

And at this point, the sanctify the ones who are the demonic worshiper people are like, all right, they're at the gate, boys. Fire up the warp portal. Oh, no. They tear a rift in reality. a warp portal and it's like blood letters flesh hounds juggernauts bring them all out go go hey what's that it's a bloodthirster his name is angrat he likes he likes cheeseburgers and blood also a bloodthirster name angrax wow all right angrath angrath sorry ingrax would have been cool actually a lot of a lot of anger names angron ang yeah that's that's a lot of them he has an old mini

that is really old. You know, for an older mini, that's not terrible. For an older mini, it's not good. It's not good. But for an older one, I'm okay with that. Look at that, look that. That tiny little axe, though. It's just like...

It's a cool looking axe, though. It is cool, but it's so tiny. Yeah, yeah. Just so, like, voo-shut. Is that the sound it makes, huh? I'm probably something a little bit more horrifying. and demonic? Yeah, probably.

So now it's like, all right, we're finally at the gates, and awesome, now it's time to deal with a gigantic deluge of corn demons. Of course, classic case of, oh, the fighting is getting really bitter and hard, and oh, we're here for a while, and oh, we're at a deadlock and a siege, you know, murder, murder, murder. And then, shy, a question on this one. When I read this, Mr. Inquisitorial Rex 1V1, the bloodthirster and killed it. Is that actually what happens? Because if so, that's kind of bullshit. I'm sorry, the Inquisitor 1V1s a bloodthirster and wins? Everything I've seen, it's like the blood, like, he, you know, there's obviously all the kind of like,

he's super powered with psychic sanctity seals and the power of the Grey Knights and all this kind of stuff to help him out. Okay, but didn't Uh What didn't didn't Didn't sanguinius literally have trouble beating bloodthusters Like didn't they get him problem? Well, I guess that was a specific named one right? But like still like bloodthusters are no joke like

Yeah, I don't I don't know it was like A battered and wounded inquisitor stabs his stake Through the chest of the bloodthirster And with the the holy worst. warnings and seals of the Grey Knights and the Emperor, he banished it back to the war. I just don't know how he wasn't turned into a paste.

I just don't know how he wasn't just like, oh, look, small person, whack. Shai said he had a nemesis four sword blessed by the Emperor himself. Yeah, but like, but like he's so small. The bloodthirsts are supposed to be a

Marshall, like, he just just, whack. Yeah. That's, uh, Like, oh, small bug man, squish. Also, why didn't they just keep carpet bombing the cathedral? Like, just until it's all rubble. Like, and everything in it is dead.

Like, why bother stopping? Well, I mean, before the War Portal, like, before they even have a chance to, like, put up the War Portal, why don't you just keep carpet bombing the place? Because Void Shield generators are often stored in, like, the deep dark basement, and they get regenerated over time. Okay. You know, a shield. Okay, that's all you had to say.

Yep, okay, gotcha, gotcha. You ever fight Baltaeus and you're about to kill him and he pops up that damn shield again? You're like, well, got to break through that. Yeah, okay. Good, good reference, by the way. That actually works well, yeah. Yeah, it's like it's always at the most inconvenient time. Oh, yeah, boy, do I hate that good.

Yeah, he's fun. So, giant bloodthirster gets shanked in the chest by an emperor blessed sword dies or sent back. And at this point, guess who shows up? Someone really awful. Something really bad shows up. I mean, you could maybe say that. The Angels of Absolution. The who?

They are a subchapter of the very powerful dark angels. Oh, no. not more dark angels. They come in there because the battle's almost won. They descend down, beat the shit out of Lord Arcos, and steal him away for interrogation,

and then leave. Of course. Okay. Well, hey, that's, at least getting rid of Lord Arco, that's, that's helpful, right? It's better than what they did last time.

It's just hilarious, because they just arrive near the end of the siege is finessees. Nally, arrive, beat the Alpha Legion back, take them, and then leave. It's such classic, classic Dark Angels shenanigans. Why are you the way that you are, Dark Angels? Why are you the way that you are? I just, it's so on brand.

It's so on brand. I'm assuming Dark Angels fans, not big fans of the Siege of Rax. I don't know. It has Dark Angels in them. Sometimes it's nice when your boys are represented. Also, what are you a fan of? It's not painted super well, right? Like, they're not, you know,

it's not like they're painted as like war heroes or, oh, look at all this crazy stuff that we did. Oh, my goodness gracious. Like, for this story, it's like, hey, if you're a Krieg fan, this is like your Bible, right? This is like your story. Well, that is true on the Krieg fan part, but, yeah.

I will, I mean, I will say that if you like Dark Angels because you like the degraded tragedy style of being these crazy paranoid marine type people, then you probably love it because of anything, they are extremely on brand. That's a fair point. Yeah, okay. Okay.

I mean, you know, it depends on how you like them. Like, if you like the craziness of them, then, hey, it certainly worked out. You're right, it is on brand, so, yeah. Maybe. Brand. Brand flakes. What?

Mm. Hmm. Brand flakes. That's quite the transition. But all right. So what happens next on VRAC? So what happens after that is that it becomes basically the final attack at the Cid. And the final final main battle to Cid.

And this is just, you know, along with the, I mean, this has all been like a. like a nine part final battle. You had the bombers, then you had the bloodthorster, and then you had all the demons, and then the dark angels arrive, steal people away, final attack on the Citadel arrives.

There's shit pouring out of the warp portal. More artillery is happening. The Kriegsmen are digging underneath the tunnels and popping up, creating new breaches. The Red Scorpions, you know, our ethnic cleansing friends have arrived.

again to help out because you know, of course they do. Yeah, yeah, yeah, okay. And before they reached the final bit of the war portal, Mr. Zufor and all of his berserkers and sanctified are like, ah, shit.

They all just leave through the portal. Oh, really? They just dip? Not without finally summoning a demon prince and a war band of corn demons to kind of have the final fight, the final fight, the final say. The final boss.

Good old demon prince Iraqi Asbramal. All righty. I don't, dude. I don't know. He's a demon prince of corn. Demon prince of corn. Cool, cool, cool.

So, yeah, nice. That's the hell of a final boss to fight. Shy is right. It's a boss rush with infinitely spawning demons. Ah. Okay. We've all played that game before. You're pushing, pushing, pushing through boss fight.

Push, push, push, push, push, push. Boss fight, yeah, yeah. And then you finally come across a demon prince of corn. And then all the Grey Knights banish him back to the warp. And together with their psychic power, they seal the warp rift. And Bada Bing, the final resistance on Vrax has been crushed. Wow. That's a, that's a lot.

I am assuming, obviously, that is the very shortened version, as we've been doing. because that's a demon prince, right? So, you know. Well, demon prince is actually a lower level than a bloodthurster. Oh, really? I thought... A bloodthirster and a great and clean one are, are greater demons of the God. They're greater demons.

A demon prince is a mortal that's been ascended to demonhood. Yeah, I guess I just thought that, like, demon, daemon princes were, like, as high as you could go without being like a freaking chaos god, right? Because nobody's going to like challenge them. For some reason, Oh, no. You got that you got backwards. Greater demons are the highest you can go before becoming chaos gods.

Oh, okay. I had, okay, I had him backwards. A demon prince would be like, what are some famous demon princes that we can? Well, actually, isn't Bellacour DM Prince? But he's way too big.

He doesn't count. I was going to say, Belichor seems like he would, he would have to be like a greater, well, he ascended to that, right? Yeah, he's the first. He's the first demon prince. That's why he's all big.

Fair, fair. But, no, I mean, there are other demon princes out and about, but, um, I don't know, it's hard to, it's hard to show off, but like, you can buy demon prince models and stuff. And they're big, but they're not greater demon big. Gotcha. Okay. Yeah, I had my demon hierarchy all wrong.

Oh, unfortunate. Where is it? There we go. Like, this game. guy is a demon prince, and as you can see, he's wearing, like, broken up, like, Chaos Space Marine armor. Oh, he's cool, though. That's a sick mini. I like that a lot. Yeah. I have one of those myself. He's, he's pretty great. Yeah, that's cool. Whereas a greater demon is, like, a great, unclean one. Or a Lord of Change, like, a giant, like, final boss. Okay, cool, cool, cool, cool. So, so them summoning a demon prince was not as crazy as I thought.

I mean, it's still crazy. Yeah, I'm not quite sure why they ended with the demon prince instead of the bloodthirster. Yeah. Because, like, this is, this is like Gilliman versus Scarbrandt. And, like, that's a greater demon. That's not a demon prince. Like, a demon prince is about maybe a little bit bigger than Gilliman. Mm-hmm.

You know, than like a primark, like, like, maybe like 1.5 times the size of a primark. But these guys are being. Oh, yeah. Isn't that the bloodthuster that was like, oh, man, I need to fight so bad. let me go try and fight corn. Yeah, that's him. And he's got that big stupid scar from like corn blasting him

and sending him hurtling through the warp. It's good stuff. Yeah, yeah. Why do I remember that? Why can I remember that? But I'm like, oh yeah, the death night. What the hell, man? Hey, man, be, listen, shy.

Being off the rails is exactly what corn wanted. Yes, yes, yes, it is. But point being, he needs to. know the difference between the demon princes. It is true, though. I don't know why they ended with the demon prince instead of the greater demon, yeah, because there were

bloodthasters there, right? Yeah, there was. There was the one that they summoned. But regardless, the portal is closed, and it's them going through the last bit of Wrex in order to find the remaining people. Specifically, looking for,

Hector Rex was looking for the old Sisters of Battle Honor Guard. That was originally there to serve and to find Cardinal Zafim. Right, because he's still in the dungeon somewhere, right? Because they just tossed him into a cell. So they went and found the sister's old, what's the word?

They're like old building, I guess. They're old like chapel. And deep down in the dungeons of the chapel, they come upon the remains of Cardinal Zafim A pathetic, blabbering chaos spawn. Oh, so he's still alive? Okay. I thought when you said Remains, it was like he's, well, air quotes, alive.

He has been turned into a funny little play thing for Nurgel, and he is just a mass of tentacles and eyes, like screaming and babbling to himself at all times. Just pure damnation. Oh boy, that is, yikes. He probably would have preferred death. Probably. Oh, boy. Probably. So, and then along that were the sisters, the six of them, that were all dragged away in shayans by the crowd in the first episode.

Uh-huh. They have been, they are currently mute and blind. as they have been tortured over the last 18 years and are still alive. Oh, no, that sucks. Down in the dungeon. Boy, when they say grim dark, they are not kidding. And it gets worse because... Oh, no.

I mean, the Grey Knights can't really take risks with them. Oh, no! The Grey Knights! So now they're going to spend the rest of their lives probably an inquisitorial cell instead of this dungeon. Oh, man. Well, at least they probably won't be tortured, I guess. Not in the chaos way.

Gotta make sure there's no corruption in them. That's true. I love how you say that just not in the chaos way. Oh, no. Grey nights. I love me some gray nights. Man, like I said, when they said 40K is grim, dark boy,

Yeah, it's no joke. You're not just whistling Dixie, brother. Who, whiff, we're already off the rails. It's a boomer term. Okay, that's fine. Sorry about it, yeah. So Cardinal Zafin gets his reward is to become a blabbering mass of eyes and awful things to,

to scream for eternity in the warp. Deacon Mamun gets to become a brand new demon prince of Nurgel. Yeah. He got them big-ass feet. He got them big ass. His reward was big toes. Yes. Yes.

He's got Doge Van Dyer's dream come true. Truth truly, he is a disciple of a cardinal. And for turning Vrax into a pestilent, disgusting planet. Yeah, boy, did he? So Cardinal Zafin, is he actually? actually screaming in the warp, or do they just, like, they find this tentically mess, and they're just like, yeah, let's just burn that. This is burn it until there's nothing left, because, mm-mm. They just burn it until it's not the best.

I'm sure his soul is screaming in the warp right now, though. Yeah. Oh, he's technically a demon, so he can't even, oh, ooh, ooh, ooh, didn't think about that. I thought that just once you burned all those tentacles to cinders, it was over, but if he's tech-oh, so he's like, ew, that's such. Yeah, well, enjoy. This is what you get when you serve chaos. You become a random spawn that does nothing but end up running around and, you know, blabbering and then being sent to be, you're like the lowest of the low. You're like an insect.

Oh, man, yeah, he's, he's going to suffer that fate for eternity. It's a pretty bad time. Meanwhile, Deacon Mamon gets all the good bits. He gets to become a demon prince because his actions... His actions basically caused Vrax. He is the one who rewarded Papa Nurgle with all kinds of things. Well, you get what you deserve, Murray. Yeah.

So, at the end of this, Vrax ended up taking 18 years to conquer over the original 12. 14 million guardsmen had lost their lives. Hundreds of space marines, multiple titans, and inquisitors had also died. The goal of the mission originally to retake the planet is technically complete, but the taint of chaos lingers. And there are also no resources left, as the entire fortifications have been born. to oblivium and all of the weapon stockpiles were used in the war.

The planet has now been quarantined by the Inquisition, too ruined to be of much use anyway, and nobody gets anything. Oh, boy. So after all that, you really, the only thing you've done is like, well, we had to drive off chaos. Like, even if there are no supplies here, even if there's nothing really to gain, you can't just leave chaos. You can't just leave all these demons here to do whatever they wish. yeah, you kind of got to see it through.

Honestly, this is, in a sense, the Siege of Vrax is a pretty big chaos dub. Yeah. They start with like six to eight million random Joe Schmo militia men on Vrax by this Cardinal guy and turn it around and kill millions and millions of guardsmen,

Titans, so on and so forth. This is funny when you're like, oh yeah, hundreds of Astardis are dead. And I was like, And that's just the Red Hunters. Yeah. It's just them. I mean, chaos did lose a decent amount as well.

The Alpha Legion. Yeah, but they're demons. They'll just respawn. Well, the Alpha Legion were taken. Some Corn Berserkers were killed. Yeah. They lost... Yeah.

Right. The Anarchy's heart and a spoiler-class ship was actually destroyed at the end. So that's also part of it. But with all of like the Imperial Navy killed, Star-Eys taken out, the guardsman cost, and the fact that Vrax is not even a usable world anymore. That's a big chaos dub.

I'd say it's a pretty big chaos dub. The battle may have been won. But they lost the war, kind of. Big dub from Mr. Mamond. One A-hole caused a massive civil war, caused massive devastation, became immortal, and bailed to the warp giggling. Yeah.

Yeah, Deacon Mamon is honestly the giant dub here. He twisted one person and turned his entire thing into what it is and ascended to demonhood. Deacon Maimon with his weird creepy face was truly the real winner here. Dang. Though, if you like your Kriegsman, you know, that's also a pretty big. It's a big Kriegsman book. It is a huge Kreisman book. And truly, what is more?

Krieg than dying? Yeah, what is more Krieg than losing massive amounts of your troops while digging trenches and holes? Truly, this is the Krieg. Well done. This is truly a Kriegsman battle. Hoof, but what an epic. What a, what a tale. What a sheesh. It's a long tail that starts off with just one random chaos guy, blaberin into the era of of a deacon going straight to, oh my God, great unclean ones are vomiting pools and a bloodthurster is here.

When this all started, I was not expecting it to scale up quite as hard as it did. Like in that first episode, it was like, oh, hey, the creek have taken a lot of ground, things are turning around. I was like, what? Four episodes ain't no shot. And then, oh boy, did things start to go crazy? It's the classic case of it can always get worse. Yeah, especially in 40K, things can always get worse. Golly.

Oh, sweet. All right, let's do this. Started with one corrupted asshole, ended with 34 Creek regiments, 22 lead geo-storm Titans, five companies of Dark Angels, the Angels of Absolution, Red hunters, Red Scorpions, Great Knights, Ordomalia, and Quisors, and Battlefleet Sikaris, versus... Factses! Factsis! Factor! Factor! Factor!

5,000 PDF. 1.5 million militia, 1.25 million Fraternus militia. 1.5 million labor corpsmen. 500,000 loss of the dam. The faithless, bersergers of Scaloters, the Purge, Apostles of Contagian, Lord of Decay, the Sanified, Steal Brethren, Black Brethren of Arias, Ad Haran's Rearrens, Rearrens, Rear. Rearves. Le Gio Volcanum, Yoraka's, Headhuners, and 30 warships. And a partridge in a pear tree

Besides me screwing up Revers I was actually pretty proud of that That was pretty good, I was gonna say You blasted through that That was kind of impressive And so did chaos So our saga Of the siege of Vrax has ended

Just a little siege Just a little siege Just a little siege Itty bitty siege, no big deal Not a big one in the slightest. Just a little siege. Just a little. Iron warriors.

Little siege. Iron warriors. Iron warriors. The thing we all love to hold dear. Pyric. A pyric? Peeric? Pyrick?

A pyric. Of a victory. One at a cost too great for it to be worthwhile for the victory. Wow. We got to start using that term. We got to use that term more often. Yeah, that's a, I'm sure, that probably gets a lot of mileage in 40K. A ton of mileage in 40K.

I was going to, how often they sacrifice millions upon millions of guard. So that's, that's, that's it. That's it, right? There's nothing else, right? No, that, that's about all. That, that's the, that's the end, the death. Damn.

That's going to be a hard four episodes to time. that, my friend? I don't know. It was fun, but it was a little scatterbrained. I'd like to, I'd like to do something really, really, like, dive into a specifics on the next topic. Maybe we'll do, like, a character or something. It's something fun like that. Ooh, okay.

Well, you've got a little time to figure it out, and I anxiously await the next episode, as I'm sure all of our listeners do, I hope. Anxiously. Yeah, yeah, yes. All right. Well, everyone, thank you so much for watching. Pick up your just a little siege merch in the description. And that poster.

And the poster. We'll see you next episode for possibly a less Pyrrhic issue. Don't cry because the war is over. Smile because it happens. I don't think there's going to be any smiling because the siege of wrecks happen.