Adeptus Ridiculous - THE WEIRD & WACKY WEAPONS OF WARHAMMER | Warhammer 40k Lore

Episode Date: August 28, 2024

https://www.patreon.com/AdeptusRidiculoushttps://www.adeptusridiculous.com/https://twitter.com/AdRidiculoushttps://orchideight.com/collections/adeptus-ridiculousIn this episode the nerds talk about various weird weapons in 40k universe, from hilarious Snazzguns to deadly daemon-sword Drach'nyen, mysterious Dawn Blade and memetic Holy Orb of Antioch.Support the show

Welcome everyone to another episode of the Adeptus Ridiculous podcast. My name is D.K. Diamanty's. His name is Bricky and our friend Karioth is here today. So once more unto the breach, dear friends. But before we get going, if you enjoyed today's episode, and maybe you want to support the podcast, head over to patreon.com slash Adeptis Ridiculous, where you can get access to the Discord,

bloopers if they happen. $15 tier gets you access to all of our posters in crispy digital HD format. If you want the poster, from last week or something. It is our wonderful Carcara Don legally distinct maid. You should check it out along with stickers. And Bricky, how about other stuff?

Yes, we are actually going to be recording the book club episode for Horace Rising next week. So go ahead and make sure you finish up the book that is basically just why Garville Loken is the coolest guy ever. It's a weird name for the book. I know, it's a strange, strange name. but like, hey, it's accurate. And then check out the merchandise, all those cool posters,

the new sticker and so on, all down at orchidate.com. Big stuff, big money, but first, hey, Kuriath, how's it going?

I'm all good. I'm excited. It's that time of the month again. End of the month, every month, we've got it locked in. We're locked in. I was born to dilly dally,

forced to lock in. I heard it's that time of the month and again. I got a little skis. But then I was like, oh no, it's Kiraath episode time. Let's go. That's a good time of the month. Let's go. As opposed to, D.K.?

That time of the month where I turn into a blood-sucking zombie. Oh, okay. Hell yeah. Hell yeah. Is it already the 15th? That's long past the 15th. Damn, your cycles off. All right.

So, Kiyov, how are we doing? And what are we doing? Okay. Today, this one's going to be a little bit tricky. to do a full quote for, but I still need to try and just get a little bit of a guess in, right? So, the universe of 40K, there's multiple important things, right? There's multiple important things that go on in terms of what makes the setting what it is, but there's a key element where pretty much anyone of any note has to have something special.

They've got to have something that sets them apart, not just like a fancy name or a book, like written about them, but they've got to have something that sets them apart from just any old random space marine slash ork slash Eldar that elevates them above all of that. And we're going to be talking about the stuff that elevates them, but very specific stuff that elevates them. Do you have any ideas? Oh, that's the quote, is that it's something that makes you unique in the world of 40K that differentiates you from any old space marine, Eldar, or whatever.

It's what really makes you worthy of, like, a book? I guess, yeah, it's more of a riddle than a quote, and not a necessarily good riddle at that, but you get what I'm going for. I go with anti-grave plates, because what else would elevate you? That's a very, very literal interpretation. I like it.

I bet it's a funny-looking gun. you know for how on the spot that was i might just give you a plus two for the anti-grav that i might i might i might then why you're keeping the wheel buffing you know i'm gonna get it well i've got to get around you know i am not even sure what i would guess because there's so many like weird little mcuffins in 40k that i just it could be anything like this could just be like uh an artifact episode where it's just like, oh yeah, we're just going to be talking about weird, quirky weapon artifacts, like soul killer, the sword of soul killer.

What does it do? It kills souls. A really cool captain has it. We write stories about him. It's pretty good, actually. Yeah. You've nailed it immediately. You've got it straight off the bat. Really? Yeah. We're going to be talking about the legendary weapons of 40K. The pure, the pure unadulterated, like, really? Seriously? I've never heard someone so, like, unsure about what they're being, what's being confirmed to them before. So, so this is why, for some reason, Lord Solar Leontas's horse happens to make him, like, as tough as a custodian, because it's a relic from the dark age of technology that powers up his horse. And that bullshit. I mean, I still am of the opinion that actually the horse is the Lord Soler, and the guy on the back is,

The decoy? That's why he's so tough because people aim at the bloke thinking they're going to take out the general, but actually the horse is the one who's in charge. Yeah, the guy in the back is the artifact. He's just there to draw fire. The horse is given the orders. That's my personal head cannon, and I don't care what anyone else says.

I think it's true. Look at his horse. His horse is amazing. Get it a lick? It tastes just like raisins. Stop it. Stop it. You old. At the stroke of its mane, it turns into a flame. So old. There are people who will not, who will not know Charlie the unicorn and Lord Solar the unicorn. That hurts me.

But I had to. Such an old reference, but not, I mean, to be fair. I love, I love that. Sorry, we're not, we're not beating. Shai posted that picture. We're really not beating the age of Sigmar has the best models allegations. Not with the teeny tiny little rap, rap, not rap. Rat holding a warp stone.

Oh, it's so fun. Oh, yeah, it's so good. Those AOS minis are so good. They really are. Anyway. And having those in such close proximity to the new sanguinary guard really puts things into extreme. God. Oh, God.

How do you do that? How do you release like, oh, my guess is that there's different teams, but how do you release that new sisters mini where she's like, has like a burning like Flaherty or whatever in her sword, you know, like for that new book? Yeah. And then, and then you release wing clipped, nipple removed sanguinary gar. What a life. It's unreal. Same company. Who would have thought it?

Like, who would have thought? Anyway, so what is this? Ancient relics, Dark Age technology stuff? The artifacts from a legend long past? Yeah, we're talking like legendary weapons of 40K. There's stuff where you get like a named character and it's like, oh, what is that sword he's holding? And it turns out the sword is like older than time or something or, you know, that sort of thing.

There's also a couple of things in here. that I think really, really kind of emphasise the fact that 40K used to be so much heavier on like silly references. So there is one that I think we're going to, we're not going to go like alfessal order. There is one that I want to throw out straight away just because more, more people need to be aware of just how silly 40K used to be. And this feels like a nice holdover of this. So when I say throw it out there, I could also be talking literally because... It's a swing! It's the holy orb of Antioch.

Oh, I know the Holy Orb. Are we pondering the orb? Yep. We're pondering the orb. It's a Black Templars thing. It's a special grenade, which is the Holy Orb of Antioch. And it is literally just a Monty Python reference.

That is pretty much all that is. They're the only ones you have it. And it's just a better grenade. It's just way more. lethal because it's been inscribed with stuff, it's got oils and like sacred acids put all over it, and for whatever reason at some point Games Workshop were like, we love Monty Python, we're going to put the Holy Hand grenade into the game. You don't have the same activation sequence with the whole chat as to you must count to three, not four, don't stop at two, etc., etc. but yeah, they used to be so much more of this.

You know, like random Inquisitors with names that were just references to other fictional characters, things like just sticking a holy hand grenade into the game for the Black Templars, because of course who else would have something that looked like that? It's got to be them. Isn't there an Inquisitor named like Inquisitor like Obi-One Canobi or something like that? Yeah, there's an Obi-1 Cluoso, Sherlock or something. I forget the full name, he's got quite a few of them. and he was like a legit character for quite a while there.

So I'm about to say something that is going to get the Inquisition knocking on my door. I have never fully seen Monty Python. So I didn't actually get the reference when you said it at first. I find that hilarious because like that statement in our Warhammer tabletop gaming crowd is probably one that like people would be damn. I can't believe that because the age demographic. is higher, but you say that on, like, Twitch and everyone else will be like, yeah, I mean, either. My dad loved that movie, though.

Oh, because, like, I've seen all, like, the meme clips from it. So, like, most of the stuff, like, I know, like, the, the improv laughing soldier and stuff and, like, the, the, the, the crucified scene at the end where they're all singing. Frenchmen, Black Knight. Yeah, the Black Knight, he's put the flesh wound, just a scratch. And he's got no arms and no legs. But I've never, like, oh, what's the flight scene? speed of a sparrow, but I've never actually watched the whole movie.

I mean, to be fair, I think they do still hold up, but I also, I also can't really blame you, because there's, there's a lot. There's, there's a lot of stuff that is just sort of transcended out of the films completely and just become their own, like, individual things that you can just find anywhere and everywhere. Like, they've just become their own little, like, shots of them have just blasted. So this holy, is this, I'm assuming this, they actually use like a holy hand grenade in movie? Yep, they have to throw the holy hand grenade at a rabbit because the rabbit has killed a bunch of people.

But it has a very... It's also just like... It's like also just a hand grenade, if I'm not mistaken. It actually just blows up like a fucking frag grenade and that's it. Oh, okay, cool. It's very lackluster when they eventually do throw it. But for 40K, they really added up, like, they made it more interesting and more and more kind of like,

thematic, it does actually really work against like chaos and demons specifically, because you know, Black Templars, they've, they've properly, they've properly made it their own, but it is also still just a silly reference, which is, there's not that many of those on this list, but it's a notable one. It's a notable one that felt like it should be given a little bit of attention. Okay. Let's go. Holy hand grenade. And yeah, it feels like back in the day GW was way more like tongue and cheek. Like learning about like fantasy. It's like, oh yeah, they used to be just funny little guys.

Like they used to just put in a funny little thing because, hey, we're just having. We got a fun little game. Let's put in a fun little cheeky reference. And there is really, yeah. There's a lot of those. I mean, hell, like half of the guard regiments, I mean, Katachin is just predator. You know, I feel like, you know, as the years went on, a combination of them getting a lot more money and trying to flesh out the universe. and also the players taking it really seriously

kind of pushed it into a more serious nature, but it's still pretty goofy, pretty often. Okay. And let's not forget that half the prime arcs are just named after, like poets, random historical figures, mythological figures. There's, there's so much just, like, reference, just thrown in to the entire background.

Ah, there we go. Okay, so Shai's got the, Shai's got the, uh, the quote, for the grenade and the Lord spake saying first shalt thou take out the holy pin then shalt thou count to three no more no less three shall be the number thou shalt count and the number of the counting shall be three four shall not thou count neither count thou two expecting that thou then proceed to three five is right out once the number three being the third number be reached then lobist thy holy hand grenade of antioch towards thy foe who being naughty in my sight shall snuff it. So you get the, you get the gist. Yeah, now I get the joke. Okay, cool. It's very, it's, it's very dry, but that's half the fun, right? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Well, that's British humor, right? Tends to be very dry and yeah. It's very, very dry, but it's, it's good, it's good. It's got a, I mean, you know, it's, it's a classic old school case. It's, it's funny because, like, you know, there's no, it's, it's hard to describe, but there are so many other things that would be equally as stupid. but that aren't movie references. Like, I remember Tanhouser's bones. Like, it's just actually the bones of one of their old marshals.

They just bring it into combat. Yeah. And that's all it is. It's just like a reliquary of bones. And like that's hilarious. But if you said it was like, and if it was like a reference to a movie, it would be still hilarious,

but like kind of goofier in that way. That makes any sense. And shy said this in the Discord chat. And I agree. I could totally imagine. imagine ad mech saying that that quote unironically about like a grenade that's like they're translated um like a like kind of blurp of um binaic yeah yeah yeah i could totally see that being an ad mech line in a book or something you know they do that drive over a vehicle or something

just like where they're always like and that just like that's the whole text is that whole that giant like binaric bleep yep yeah that makes sense the translation yep do you have any other movie references? Oh, God. There's, I mean, there's, there's been a few... Curious, like, that's the whole episode, dude. Let me get to the next one. They've, they've been, like, when it comes to, like, specifically weapons, for the most part,

they're fairly, they're fairly, like, controlled about it. They haven't kind of gone as wild as they have with, you know, like half the references in the, in 40K being directly traceable to other stuff. Yeah, it's... There's, there are some... some good, like, very 40K unique sort of takes on weapons, though. There is, there's one that I really, really like this. It's extremely over the top.

There was a bloodthurster called Kāak Lash Katashka, which I will, I'll put in Discord, because you would not get how to pronounce it from that. Whoa. It's a lot. What the hell? It's a lot. I don't know why.

I think I've got it right, probably. Kaak lash, ka-ak-cha, I think. Yeah, that's the best I could do to you. Close enough, right? So, this was a bloodthurster, who also had another name, which was The Usurper. Absolutely infamous bloodthurster,

obviously great a demon of corn, extremely powerful, one of the most powerful warp entity spawned. And after a while, this particular bloodthurster, the usurper, decided they wanted a little bit more. So he tried to set himself apart from the blood god and turn against corn.

Oh, is this the guy that gets yeated? This is a guy who is like Angers. Angers corn so much that he is just imprisoned immediately in a massive axe that's made out of metal forged in the warp itself and then chucked out of the warp into reality. Corn just went, I'm not having this, you're now a weapon, get out. Just threw him into the real world.

Right. I feel like we talked about this guy, didn't we, Bricky? No, I think there's the other bloodthirster that gets thrown really, really high up into the air and then lands and, like, breaks his wings. That's scarbring. brand. Oh, right. He's got the scar on his eye, right? Well, his wings are also like tatters.

They're just like bones. There are a lot of bloodthirsters that want to try corn, aren't there? They try it on every now and again. They build up the confidence. They're like, well, the last one got thrown and had the wings broken. The one before that got turned into an axe, but maybe I've got a chance. Maybe I'll give it a go.

So who has this axe, if anybody? Because I'm assuming a chaos axe that has a bloodthirster. The greatest bloodthirster ever in it is going to be mighty, mighty strong, and whoever can wield it is probably

going to get possessed and or is someone like, I don't know, Abadon. Well, it's funny you should mention that. There have been a lot of, a lot of people who have tried to wield this thing, and they all end up getting just destroyed

by the rage of the bloodthuster that's trapped in it. Mm-hmm. And it gets to the point where there's like a constant, like a constant war. There's like millions of, millions of zombies on a world called Messia, which is part of the gloaming world. And every now and again, mutant will pick up the axe and just start murdering. Of course. Does the axe have a name or do you just call it Ka Aklash, Kaakshha?

because it's his name. So it is just the axe of Karashka. Okay. Axia, Aska, Axia. Jesus Christ. The acts of the bloodthirst, they should just call it the ax of the usurper. Yeah, that would make way more sense, way more easy to pronounce. Yeah, but usurping is not a very corn thing.

That's a very zeech thing. Yeah, well, and the guy never actually usurped anything. He got blown away before he could usurp the throne. so not a great name for him. Corn dragged Scarbrand to the pinnacle of the brass citadel and held him a lot for all to see. Then corn hurled Scarbrand across the warp where he flew for eight days and nights,

leaving a blazing trail of destruction across the realm of the gods. Scarbrand's landing carved out a massive canyon and tore his wings to shreds. Ka-Ock says, nah, I'd win. Nah, I'd win. Yep. Yep. And then, so I do like the idea

that he put him in the axe, and he's just like, I don't even want to see this anymore and just throws it into real space. Yeah, which chucks it. It's probably a horrifying nightmare. Like, how would, you go from being like the most powerful bloodthirsty

and you get a bit uppity and then you're just trapped in a weapon for eternity and not even eventually held by like anyone cool. So like the mutants that are on this world, one of them's just got it and is carrying it round. Oh. And when the sun shines on it, him, he just becomes super intelligent and, like, devious.

And then we'll know what the axe is. Wait. Except that doesn't seem to happen. So it's just... So, so this axe is only on this world full of mutants. Like, no one else has ever, like, found it, gotten it, take, like, a, I don't know, like a world eater or, like, I don't know, a Black Legion guys never found it and, like, like, It's just been, yep, it's just been held on to by one mutant who doesn't really understand what it is

unless a specific set of conditions are met at which point, then it'll know what's going on. Man, it sucks to be the usurper. It's very, like, it's very kind of, like, is it like a, is it, is it Cicephas, where it's kind of the idea of it being, there's like a set of conditions that have to be met for the thing to succeed, and for things to progress, but that's just not happening. So therefore, this poor bloodthuster that is now an axe is just waiting around, just waiting forever for someone to come and take the axe and do something with it,

but it never happens. It kind of reminds me of when that Keeper of Secrets was like, I am the most powerful keeper of all time. No one can ever best me in combat. And then Angron rolled up and beat them to. death with a metal pipe and then forge them into a sword. And now they're used by Angron. Yeah.

Yeah. Good stuff. Good stuff. Good stuff. Good stuff. It's what you get. I'll tell you what. Let's move on to some traditional sneaky, devious, secretive lads and just have a little chat about the dark angels and the fact that interrogator Chaplain Asmodai has an artifact

called the Blades of Reason. Oh, I love this thing. The Blades of Reason, huh? The Blades of Reason. Ancient, ancient device, obviously, full-on old artifact that is just full of cruelty and, I quote, the sorrow of mankind.

Oof. There's a bunch of blades. They have got nice inscriptions of, like, repentance and scripture. in Old Caliban, and there's a bunch of wires and kind of cables and stuff all around the head of it, which is mystic science, and exists only to amplify pain to an unbearable level. That's the whole reason for it. So Asmadae just goes up to fallen angels and hits some of the old blade of reason

and causes them excruciating agony until they give up the info. And to be fair, he does also do it in an attempt to save their soul. Because, you know, if you hurt someone enough, that'll redeem them. That's how that works. I like the fact that it is basically

a dark age technology torture device, but I really love the description of the button, which is the mercy switch to bring oblivion to the repentant because the mercy switch is like, is like just like killing them. The kill button, yeah. Yeah.

It's so funny because back in the, he doesn't have it anymore as part of his data sheet, which is sad. But his old data sheet had the blades of reason. And they were always like a really mediocre of power. Like they had like no armor penetration and like a low strength. But it always had some astronomically over the top level of damage. I think it was like one attack at like 30 D3 plus three. Some just ridiculous thing where it's like, hey, well, it's, it's, it's, gonna be a little hard to get it through, but if you get it through,

like this person's gonna suffer. Yeah. Just insanely over the top. Just absolutely devastating. When you mentioned Dark Angels and you said Blades of Reason, there was a part of me was like, oh, this has got to be some shenanigans where like, oh, if you get hit by the blades of reason, you know, there'll be some psychic magic nonsense. It'll make you speak the truth.

And it's like, no, no, no. It is as simple as, oh, this thing is just, it's just going to torture the hell out of you. And maybe if you speak the truth, he'll hit the mercy switch and you can just die. Whoa, whoa, whoa. Be redeemed. Oh, sorry. Sorry, sorry. You can be redeemed.

Right, right, right. My bad. That is actually a really nice bit of extra info you get from that image because it really does imply that that is the only, like, it's only used to bring oblivion to the person who has repented. So, like, it's not for killing the person who hasn't repented. They get to carry on living and get to carry on being tortured. But if you say you're sorry, then he'll kill you. Yummy. Yeah, shy said what if a cattle prod was from the Dark Age of Technology?

Cows were just really big back then, so they had to really amp it up. Dark Age of Tech, nights were used as, you know, construction tools, so. Asma die is just Anton Sugar from No Country for Old Men. You know what I find really funny is that he can lead the inner circle companions too. And it's actually a pretty good combo. But it's just really goofy to me because the inner circle companions, I think are supposed to be like the risen, the redeemed fallen.

And the idea that Asmodai is like leading a group of the redeemed is, I'm just imagining him like internally just his blood can like cook pasta. Can I just say that 2024 has ruined me to the point where you said the risen. and I, in my brain. I know. No. I literally cringed a little bit. I was like, oh, the R-I-Z-Z-E-N, huh? And I was like, wait, no.

No, the risen are cool. It's made you forget an actual word. Yes. You replaced an actual word with a different word. Yes. I hate it. There's a little risen in all of us, all right? Mm-hmm.

Sure, pure, sure. Next weapon. Oh, wait, Shiazad, isn't Asma Dye so effed up that the lion in present day doesn't want to have him around. I would need source, but I believe you. Especially present day lion. Like how sort of redeemed lion is and how willing he is to get the risen. I would believe that he would want a someone like this that has the dark age of technology cattle prod.

Probably not a huge fan. Yeah. Yeah, I don't know the source to that, but I would fully believe it. Yep, 100%. I mean, he's clearly a wrong and so, you know, would you really want him around all that much? You know, the old methods might have worked up to a point, but you've literally got a weapon that has a switch for only killing people who've said sorry. That's, you know, there's a line there that might have been crossed at some point, you know? Even for a dark angel. A line might have been crossed. Let's stick with them for a second, because they do all.

also have another artifact, which is Traders Bain. Oh boy. Which is wielded by Ezekiel, the Grand Master of Librarians, massive, mastercrafted, two-handed force sword. And I selected this one,

primarily because it made me think of a terrible film, which made me laugh. Suicide Squad. Yep. Yep. I knew exactly where you're going with this. Traders Bain is Suicide Squad? It's rumored.

to possess the trapped spirits of the fallen angels it's killed. And the rage of them is like so, so kind of tightly bound into this sword that when it kills people, it gets darker and the shadows draw in. Whenever the fallen are near, it kind of alerts that one of them's around because the other dead fallen that it killed

are still in the sword. And it really just made me think of that whole, moment with Katana, just straight up. I was like, oh dear. That's ruined that for me, is what happens. Yeah, once you explain the sword, I was like, ah, that's okay.

Now I get my talking suicide squad. A.K. A.K. Makes sense. Sure, sure. Still, cool weapon. Traders Bane. It's a cool weapon. It is. I like it. I just don't like that suicide squad exist. Ruined it for you. Is that fair? Is that a fair thing to say? I think that's fair.

The first Suicide Squad had its, it had its moments. No, it didn't. That was the best moment. Yeah, the end. Holy shit. Got them. Let's go. It has one good moment.

One, and that moment is when they're chilling at the bar and like the, the, the, end of Act 2 low point. That's the only good part of that damn film. Why do I vaguely remember there being some okay, like, action sequences? I didn't see, I couldn't even see them. It was so dark that movie. Maybe I'm just having selective memory, because I haven't seen it since it came out. Were you watching the wearing like Night Vision goggles, and you got an experience that the rest of us didn't get?

Maybe I was. Maybe I have superpowers and I can see in the dark. I don't know. Oh, I was selecting. Don't be wrong. I was selecting to turn the fucking thing off. All right. Next weapon.

Let's carry on with some sword action, because you can't have, you can't have like a conversation about legendary weapons from 40. and not talk about the Dornblade. That is, that's one of the most important ones. Farsight's sword that seems to be increasing his lifespan by stealing it from whatever he's killed using said weapon. Allegedly, this might be ethereal propaganda. It might be. It's true.

We don't know. We don't know. We don't know exactly what it is. what it does, other than he's like three centuries old or something and Tal don't live that long. That's not how that works. Plus, the

Dornblade, by a lot of reckoning, is older than the Imperium is. It's been created by a Xenos race that is no longer around. It was left on the world on which it was found.

And they don't know what it's made from. So the earth cast of the Tao who do all their sort of building engineering like weapon construction and stuff like that they don't actually know what it's made from and it can just physically cut through rock just by itself.

It's just that sharp the whole time. It's pretty Eldar coated honestly. It clearly looks like he's added some bits to like the handle and stuff to carry it but it certainly looks out of our coded. So this is a giant sword because he uses it in his crisis suit. It's not something he uses

just like on foot when he's just prowling around outside of his suit. Oh yeah, it's massive. It's like the same size as I think the blade is like, yeah, it's like the blade is bigger than he is not counting the hilt, which, and it has been modified

so that it is attached to the to the battle suit. Otherwise he wouldn't really get much out of it, would he? He's too small to left a he would be in trouble. I mean, it would be impressive. But it's way cooler on his crisis suit. Yeah. God, all the art of his crisis

suit or him is so cool. I mean, it's far sight, so like it should be. But God, he's the best one. He's so badass. He really is. So good. The eight are so cool. Well, there's only like six of them now, but. Well, as long as Torchstar

smoking abs are still involved. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I had to. It's part of the Bingo card. Check it off. Oh, is there a bingo card? Probably at this point. Yes, and he also broke it off a statue and killed a bloodthuster with it. So, you know, it's pretty

good and he's pretty good with it. Well, I guess Farsight is one of those characters that's so prominent and so important to his, like, little unit that he should be one of the people that's killing greater demons with, like, a really cool, um, McGuffin weapon or a really cool, like, ancient weapon

of the Zinos or something. That's the rule, isn't it? If you're an important character, you get to kill one greater demon of your choice. I think that's how they do it. I want to say, those dudes just die, like, can't, like, start falling every time. I don't know why they have such a hard on for, like, how to show that this character is a badass, have them kill a bloodthirster. You know, it's almost gotten to the point where, um, if you've seen, uh, you watch

red letter media a lot, right? Like, their description of, like, how, what Worf is the Star Trek the next generation, where he's like, oh, he's the big, buff, crazy. alien that's so strong, but he always gets beat up to show how strong the alien is and how, oh, you can't just beat him with strength because, look, they beat up Wharf. And, like, it kind of feels like the greater demons are like that. It's like, oh, yeah, they're so strong. Oh, they're so buff. But, ooh, look at how important this character is. He killed one with his sword. It's like, oh, wow, he's so strong. I mean, it's spawned its own, like,

trope named, didn't it? It's like, it's the wolf effect where it's just... Yes, exactly. If it happens in a film, it's, it's named after the... that because of how often Worf got slapped around by a random dude, yeah. Shai said there's no malicious vibe to the Dawnblade and they say if Farsite ever figures out that it steals life

of its victims, he will throw it out. It's true, he is kind of an honorable dude and if he knew that that's what it was doing, he probably wouldn't be as keen to use it, would he? He probably is also, I mean, he's also like classic well, that's very, this happens so often.

is that he's doing like a big battle and then corn is like, eh, has it going, kid. It kind of throws that vibe around here and there. And it's definitely one of those ones where like, I wonder if the Domblade is slightly, like it's not like corn possessed or nothing,

but I wonder if the amount of time he's had it and like how, well, no, stealing the souls of a victim. Well, we don't know if he's stealing the souls, right? Yeah.

We don't know if he's stealing the souls, right? We just know he's extending his life, but we don't know if he's eating their souls technically. I guess we assume that he probably is. There's a part of me that thinks that on some level he knows, but he doesn't want to admit it. Because, like, when you live for three centuries, it's like, gee whiz, I wonder why this is happening.

And you start, like, checking off boxes in your head as to what it could be. And it's like, well, gee, I found this weird Zeno sword on a statue that I've been using for three centuries. maybe that has something to do with it. Yeah. No one else seems to be living this long, but it could just be a coincidence. Also, it is like,

I suppose it would be technically the honourable thing to do to chuck it out, but on the other hand, I'm going to go ahead and guess that whoever he's killed with that sword, he would have killed anyway because he would have, like, viewed it as being, that, like, what needed to be done.

And it's not like he's just out there, he's not like out there murdering for fun. it has a purpose. He's killing elder children, right? Yeah, he's not like, it's not just, you know, having a, just having a wail of a time of a Saturday night

killing random people. Like, I, maybe there would be a point where it kind of go, well, okay, this, this isn't, this isn't what I want, but on the other hand, I'm not killing innocent people. With this, and I would have

fought those battles anyway. I don't know. I don't know. Yeah, and because I'm taking evil souls, I get more time alive to kill even more evil and do more good. I mean, that's not so hard a bit, but. I wonder necessarily if, like, how would, okay, I should know this question,

but I forget. Do the Tao, the Tao are aware of the Warp's existence, right? Do they know how it works? Or are they, like, kind of naive to that? I don't know if they, like, I know if they know because they definitely, but like, don't the,

don't the ethereal is, like, try to keep that shit under wraps? That doesn't seem like ethereal propaganda, where it's like, oh yeah, the work doesn't exist, no way. So I guess the question is like whether or not Farsight would understand that he might be like stealing the souls of the dead as opposed to just like, because I mean, I don't believe you can extend your life. That like, I don't know. It seems weird how you could extend your life by killing people and not have it be like warp slash soul based unless there's some other reason for it that I don't know. Well, it is unnamed Xenos race that they haven't expanded upon.

So you can, they can literally do whatever they want with it. They're not even restricted to the warp, right? Made from chronopathic alloys, which add a slain foes remaining natural lifestam to that of its owners. Oh, so it probably is just, it probably is just like Necron. It's not a Necron weapon, but like it's necron coded where it's so advanced. It's like as if it is magic when in reality it's just hyper advanced. Yeah. That's probably

That kind of sounds right, doesn't it? Yeah, I believe that, yeah. I know how that Zenos race died out if they could make a sword like that? I don't know, maybe 90 trillion lions attacked them. Okay, all right, well, you could take out the sun that way, so. It's true.

It could be pre-Necron. It could be necrone tier arrow. They use it to extend their bad lifestyle. It could be old one related. Or better yet, it could be, It could be like what GW always does, which is like, here's this badass thing. We will never explain it.

And we will, it's like a nice little tidbit, and that's all it will be. And that's okay. Yeah. Yeah. I do like that, though. I like the unexplained ones.

What the hell is this? Well, there's about 18 different options, and we're not going to tell you any of them. Let's go. If they tried to explain it, they'd make it overcomplicated and it would seem weird. Yeah, letting your imagination go wild with it. Like, yeah.

It has a certain genus sequo to it. Yeah. Yeah. It's like that one image of all like the other alien species with like the crocodile with the gun and stuff and like the weird orb dudes. And we're like, what the hell are all these? Like, I don't know, but they're around. And I'm like, that's cool. Yeah.

And the guy that's just a big square with hazard stripes all over it with a club. Yeah, that guy. That guy specifically. I was like, hell yes. I don't know what that is, but I want it. It's awesome. I love how, I love how even in whatever culture that is, they still have. hazard stripes.

Oh, yeah. Yeah, there it is. Who the hell is he? I don't know. Intelligent species develop hazard stripes at the same sort of point in evolution. That's how that works. God, that art is so hard.

I don't know where I've been seeing this, but I've been hearing, like, I've been hearing occasional musings that, like, the 40K, like, art has gotten too, like, safe and saturated. And there are definitely some moments where it has that. But they keep on putting out these just,

disgustingly grungy pieces and it's so good every time. Oh yeah. Yeah, 100%. There's still some really good out they're putting out, especially that one. I love that. Yeah. Anyway, next one. Yep.

Let's talk about a sword that has been explained. Potentially, potentially too much. So if, uh, if, if you know anything of Abadon, the Dispoiler, you of course know that he's got two weapons. One being the talent of Horus, which we'll talk about in a sec. and the other one being drachn and now i read this forever as drachnian and then i was told it was drachnian okay the voice actor and master of mankind called it drachnion so i'm going to call it that yep okay i'm happy about that so drachnion is a very very powerful demon sword

it's extremely strong it can rip through pretty much anything armor vehicles you name it It's also covered in little faces that sap the life and blood of its victims. It can kind of reform itself a little bit to show the faces of the many people that it's killed. And Drakhanian was not originally a sword. Drakhanian was, in fact, a demon. Technically, technically, like, I don't think not the first demon, I don't think it was. It's like that sort of vibe where it was born from... That the emperor has trouble killing, can't kill it, seals it, and, you know.

Yeah, we read Master of Mankind, so we got a good amount of drachnian lore, luckily. Yeah. Yeah. Born from the first murder, and then became the end of empires, went through a whole range of possessing people who were controlling things like Titans and giant, weird constructs, and then eventually forced to become a sword, and then lodged in a dude, and then... Then quite a while, but later, after a little bit of poking around, a little bit of bargaining, Abadon gets his hands on the sword that was, like, the first human murder. It's really cool. I really like the design of it. I think it's, I think it's like one of the most interesting ways that they've kind of tied in

the equivalence between what happens in real space and the warp. like the fact that something could be born of like the first time a human murdered another human is really really cool but it's almost become of those things where I feel like it's been explained a bit too much but it is still badass where all the magic is kind of gone from it

it's kind of the opposite of Farisites weapon where it's like ooh there's so much mystery behind it that's so cool and Dracnion is just kind of like well we know every little Bip and Bob about like the demon that's in the sword how the sword works, where he's been, la-da-da-da-da, we know Abidon's got it, and now all of the sort of magic has been sort of revealed.

You know that there's not actually a rabbit in the hat, and it's like, oh, no magic? No, I'm actually, I'm actually a little bit, I think I might actually disagree a little bit on that one. Oh, okay. I don't think it's too over-explained. I think it's just, I think it's explained, like, enough. I don't know if you can explain it more,

but it's kind of just like, yeah, you know, like, hey, it's the whole, this is the, the sword, this is what it is, it's the first murder. I guess if anything, I wish there was more other objects of demons, like, based on, on the primordial instincts of humanity and other things like that. Like, this is born in the first murder of humankind, but, like, I'd prefer, I really like something you can almost take it kind of biblical, where, like, the first lie ever told. Yeah, like how to make it sort of.

Sins of sinned. Yeah, like a little subs, human sinned. Okay. Yeah, yeah. A little sub-trial. Okay, that'd be cool, actually. I could see some, like, I could see them taking some weird shit, like, like, this sword was made out of the rib that made Eve. Like, just, like, weird crap.

Yeah. Okay. Okay. Like, leaning really heavily into it would be, would be really fun. And, like, you could branch it out a lot more, like, in a lot more interesting ways. Like, like, the idea of, like, the first betrayal. or the first lie, you could end up with all sorts of really fun, weird artifacts

that are just, like, properly tied into the whole idea of real space, emotional stuff affects the warp, because it's sort of mirrored in there. And, yeah. And you could do, like, good emotions for, like, loyalist primarks, too. And make, like, holy weapons instead of just, like, you know, demonic, look, I'm the first murder sword. Ooh.

The acts of hope. Yeah, exactly. look like, I don't know, but it would be kind of cool. The first person who like sacrificed themselves for another. Ah, yeah, the first sacrifice, sure. Maybe, maybe you have the first lie ever told, but then you have the first lie ever told in like a savior thing, like, like, I'm Spartacus kind of thing. Ah, yep, yep.

Yeah. I like it. I like it. I like it. We got some ideas. We got ideas sometimes. Yeah, trademark it before GW takes it. Quick, go on it.

Let's go on it. All right. So that's, that's Draknean, of course. You got a weapon. You got, oh, oh, the head, town of horse. Yeah. It's got to have a mention because it's like the, like, the kind of the lightning claw, isn't it? It's like the kind of prototype, the idea of having the, the guns actually fitted into the back of the guntlet. It's kind of got, like, fairly, I think the combi bolter attached to it is, like, obviously it's super ancient, but it's also like an early,

version of that type of gun. It's like the big, the big prototype for both of those kind of weapons being mass produced afterwards. And it also, again, is just an incredibly well-designed looking weapon. It looks awesome. It isn't all that special in terms of like, it's still, like, it's not like full of, full of magic and mystery. It is a bit demonic now, but it's mostly just a giant claw with a massive gun implanted into the back of it. And what's wrong with that? Yeah. Yeah.

Let's go. So did, did he design it? Did he get someone to make it for him? Is it just, was it just a chaos relic he found? Because, like, everybody can use lightning claws now. Well, it's the talent of Horace. Like, it's, I mean, he had this before he turned traitor. It's, it's Horace's talent.

Right, right, right. But did, like, he make it? or did he get someone to make it for him? So it was... It was built. It was built by the same guy who did the Terminator armor that Horace wears. A guy called malevolous. Definitely not like an evil-coded name.

Sounds like a proper chap, yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, yeah, yeah, definitely. And it's like, it is, again, that whole prototype thing. So it was built specifically, like, specially before all of that stuff. was widespread and built a long, like long, long, long time ago. And funnily enough, you'll be shocked to learn that malevolous, when I said, had something of an evil-coded name, he was a co-conspirator of Kelbor Hal. So, you know, pretty on the nose there.

You could sort of tell which way that was going. And, yeah, he did turn traitor. Obviously, he's called malevolous. Yeah, the writing was on the wall, right? Yeah. No, the writing was on his birth certificate. Yeah, the writing was on his name. It was the birth certificate, sure.

I will say I like that image of the talent of Horace because it really runs me down that same vibe of like chain-fed ammunition. Each shell blessed in blood sacrifices to the dark gods. And then like talent here made of pure gold from only the greatest labor in Africa. And then like this part, Supreme branded. sticker $5,000, only one of 10 made. It's kind of like take his fit in a way. Yeah. I don't know.

It kind of gets me. I will be honest. I really like that picture because like you said, the descriptions are funny, but I did not realize that lightning claws could have like ammunition and combi bolters on the back. I thought like talons and lightning claws were just like, oh, hey, look, I've got big claws for melee that like, I didn't realize you could put a gun on the back of these things, and that makes them infinitely more cool.

Well, they also went through, they went through, like, design changes as well. So the, like, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, things themselves are the claws, but then for a lot of the loyalist stuff, the lightning claws, so they're more like, more like, sort of Wolverine style, um, oh, right, right, right, right. Um, which, I actually prefer the whole, the whole, like, hand just being the claws. I think, it looks way more scary, but there is an exception to this, where there is the ultimate set of lightning claws, which they deserve a mention when ever talking about any sort of 40K weapon,

because the ultimate set of lightning claws are the ones wielded by Tibuross the Red Wake, which are called Hunger and Slake, and they are lightning claws that have chainsaws also attached to them in the palms of the hands. So he's got the lightning claws coming out of the top of the gauntlet And then he's got chainsawds in his palm What? Check out our awesome new poster at orchidate.com Where you can see legally distinct and great representation of that

As a character from a gotcha game. Yay! Wait, really? Say yay! Yay! Oh, those ones! Oh, okay. Yeah, these ones. Like, you would said like, oh, yeah, he's got the claw.

the thing in the hand and I was like, wait, what? Okay, gotcha, gotcha, okay. Yay, those are so cool. Yeah, agreed. The dude literally has like hand chainsaws with retractable, like shark, was it, shark spear barbed claws? I don't, I don't think, like, I don't think you can get a lot more 40K weaponry than that. That might be the most, the most 40K of weapons. Oh, yeah.

And the rest of his arm really. It just fits so well. It doesn't even, like, such a ridiculous lightning claw doesn't even look out of place on him at all. It's so good. Because the dude is so big. He hasn't crossed the Rubicon. He hasn't crossed the Rubicon Primaris yet, has he?

No. I think, if I remember right, that bit of that bit of art that shy's put, and I think it's fan art as opposed to official GW. I think so. But they, I do. like the fact that in that art they've made him insanely big. He's like, that's borderline

primark sized. What the absolute size of him? He is dwarffing that space marine. Like that's when he gets up to that space submarine, he doesn't even reach his waist. Like he's going to go up to like his thigh. When he's like, oh man,

that's a big boy. Tiberos means shark in Spanish. Oh, God. Of course it does. Of course it does. Why wouldn't it? Why wouldn't it? You know what? I never thought to look that up, and I feel vindicated in having never wanted to look that up. I think I made the right call.

I think I made the right call there. What are you guys' thoughts on Ferris Manus, the man whose name is the Iron Hands, who is part of the chapter of the Iron Hands, and who has a ship called the Fist of Iron? Oh, man, just cinema. Cinema. Cinema. Kino. Exactly.

This is why I refuse to listen to anyone who, who, who, pulls the 40K is a serious universe for serious people. It's like, no. No, it's not. What you're talking about? What do you mean? He's called iron hand and leads to the iron hands, and his hands are made of iron. What are you talking about?

It's serious. Stop it. It's clearly not. People taking things that are not too serious, too seriously, they mistake that for passion. You can be very passionate about you and your hobby and not take it seriously. Yeah. 100%.

You can, they're not mutually exclusive. No. Do you have any other chaos ones? I like the dracchnea one of them. I'm kind of feeling like Lord Gar was right. So like I'm kind of, I'm thinking more things. Oh, no. Well, I mean, there is, there is possibly the most famous chaos one.

Because we've also got the blade of the layer. Leah? Layer, again. I read them all. I never did the audiobooks. So having read them all, I get to words and I go, there's no way this is going to come out correct. them. I didn't do

what is it? I didn't do Folgram so I don't know but like layer blade whatever. Yeah. The sword that was responsible for the absolute downfall of Fulgrim and you know, spoiler alert for a series that's been out of don't know how long. Obviously that does lead to slight issues

for Iron Hand of the Iron Hand with his iron hands. He has significant trouble thanks to thanks to this sword which is technically, now, at least, just a very fancy power sword. But it did used to have something of an inhabitant. There was a little bit of demonic nonsense going on, which meant that Fulgroom eventually turned full traitor and became obsessed with perfection beyond that which he was already, and became a servant of Slenesh. And for a little bit, the entity in the sword was just inhabiting,

him. So in terms of famous 40K weapons, it's got quite the, it's got quite the hold, you know, absolutely ruined a prime arc and took his place for a little while, sort of, kind of. Yeah. That's the, that's the one where it's like, uh, if, if, if men had a time machine, they'd, don't take the sword fulgroom. I mean, it went so bad for it. I went so bad. I would you ever need a woman to hold you when you can have the sword do it? I suppose so, sure, sure. As long as someone will hold me. You know, Emperor, it wouldn't pretty great if you, like, warned him about, like, the temptations of Slanesh and been like, hey, oh, check it out.

That is literally the symbol of Slanesh on that sword. It is actually the symbol of Slenish. It is the symbol of the dark prince. If you would, like, just giving him like an encyclopedia that was like, all right, you see this, like, skull one, that's corn. Zeech is this weird bird thing Give them the card with all the names All the Send your flash cards

And don't look at them for too long Yeah Love the idea of him spotting Fulgram with it Like on his waist And just be like Could I politely request You put that down immediately

Because I don't I really don't think You should be holding on to that I just don't think it's good idea Okay Just listen to me right Hey Fulgrim What do you have there

A knife? No No That'd be so Gray, he's walking in to commune with the emperor and it's like, he's got the sword on his, on his hip, it's like, what? What's that? Oh, it's just a cool

little thing I found. No big deal. I found it in a temple where a bunch of snake people were having sex. That seemed like a cool idea to pick it up. It seemed like a good idea at the time, so no big deal, right? We were actively killing them and they didn't stop. So I figured this sword was definitely the right move. I have something

I need to tell you. The emperor is sitting there like, oh, that seems fine. And then, and then, and then The Volgram's like, oh yeah, they were purple colored too. It's like, purple? Purple! Purple! The sun glints on the sword. It's like, what's that on the sword? Ah, just some carvings.

Rage intensifies. It's what's one of those, like, every obvious thing just goes by the waist side until like a very light, the obvious thing, too, arrives, and it's like, oh yeah, they have to have like three boobs. Three boobs! What? No! Some of them had claw hands, too. I don't know what that was like that was.

Oh, yeah, yeah, that's a good idea. Let's do the black, uh, the black blade. of Antwer, whatever the hell you call it? Oh, yeah. It's so good. I mean, it's not good. It's obviously really bad, but it is good because of how bad it is. So the blade of Antwera, it's another demon sword. The Grey Knights came across it, they grabbed it, and it is completely impossible to destroy. They've tried, they've done what they can, it's just impervious to their attempts to get rid of it. But it's obviously a horrific artifact of chaos. You don't want to just chuck it out of an airlock and hope that it never lands somewhere important.

Oh yeah, because they land in the hands of someone you don't want it to end up in. Yes, yeah. They don't want that risk. They also didn't really want to just lock it in a vault on Titan because then that just leads to temptation. And you don't want someone opening the door and being like, this is mine now, lull, like right in the middle of their fortress monastery. That would also be a bad thing. So, they gave it to one of the chapter purifiers. They gave it to one Kestellan, Garenkrow,

and he holds the sword all the time. So it doesn't tempt anyone, and he's the only one strong enough for it. And, okay, I remember this one now. Yes, yeah. So he has to hold on to it, permanently just resisting its attempts to urge him into doing things he shouldn't

and trying to overtake his will with like warp sorcery and the like and it's an insanely strong weapon it was used during a during a war a guy called the Blind King had this sword and using the sword and the influence that it had

absolutely ruined three full sectors. And the Grey Knight's put a stop to it, but the sword is like, you cannot have it in anyone else's hands. So he just holds onto it the whole time. He's just got it. He's using it as his sword, but without being able to use... I was about to say he can't use it. So to him, realistically, it's just a sword.

It's not a magic sword. it doesn't grant him any powers. It's just a sword sword to him because he doesn't use its influence, right? It's just a very fancy sword. Yeah. And that's it. It's also a little strange because

like for a long time, they just gave him a bunch of rules to make him really good, but his sword was like 401 because it's just a hunk of metal. Yeah. But they since like pulled that back. I guess now they let him use it in a weird way.

So now it's like 622 devastating wound. So I don't know. I guess they changed it. I guess maybe the sword does his power a little bit instead of giving it to him or whatever the hell. But he's cool. That's a sick Joy Toy. Yeah, that's cool. Holy.

They really gave his sword some oomph in that. I'm still waiting. I'm still waiting to get myself the Imperial Knights Joy Toy one. It's probably the only one I actually want because it's so big. I kind of want the Ardeman one. I want the pre-heresy art. one that they have. Yeah,

they are one's pretty cool. Yeah, Crow is neat. His, uh, the big spooky sword is, they don't, they don't do much.

I don't know if they have many books about Crow, but like, oh, dude, imagine like a buddy cop thing. It wouldn't work because he doesn't talk to the sword, obviously.

He's throwing the sword trying to solve crimes across the empire. But like, yeah, he like, he like completely ignores the sword. I'm pretty sure. So it wouldn't really work. But I can totally see kind of like,

and twice did king where you had the other personalities like constantly talking to him yep that'd be funny that'd be funny good cop bad cop uh shy says she personally imagined it as disco elizium where your tie talks to you giving you horrible advice to eff yourself up constantly

come on britton go let's have some fun yeah you know I think definitely disco elizium vibes from the way the sword talks to him 100% that's pretty good that's pretty good actually Yep, that's the way to look at it for sure. Fails a empathy check.

I want to have fuck with you. Man, I need to finish Disco Elysium one of these days. I always start it, never finish it. And I don't know why. It's so funny. Anyway, do we have any more weapons? I'll tell you what. Let's do a little jump.

I'm going to prepare you for something. Then we're going to do something that's just quite good. And then we're going to go to, I think, one of the most important weapons in 40K. So we talked a little bit about silly weapons. There is, there is a very good silly weapon. It's not technically a named weapon like a lot of the ones that we've talked about so far, but I wanted to throw it in here because just the idea of it is perfect for 40K.

The Condemmer Bolter, which is one of my favorite weapons in the setting. Because it's a bolter with a crossbow attached to it. Wait, what? Really? Oh, yeah, completely. Yeah. It is, it is, it is a bolter. It's just a normal, normal Imperium balter, but it has a secondary launcher, and it's not a grenade or anything like that. Oh, no. No, it's a crossbow, and it fires silver stakes that have been engraved disruptings. Oh, it's a, okay. As soon as I saw who was wielding it, I was like, you know what, that makes so much sense now.

Yeah, I'm pretty sure is literally like anti-cyker. Like, it's literally a witch steak. Yeah, okay. All right, all right. That makes sense now. Suddenly at all, I'm just like, at first I was like, why the, what, a space marine want that? And it's like, ah, because a space marine wouldn't want that. All about the Inquisition doing inquisitiony things.

And I just love it because it's like, it's quite, it's a relatively rare weapon because it's really only the Inquisition that want anything to do with it. But it's in a universe of power armor and giant, walking cathedrals, there is still crossbows. A crossbow, yeah, it's got a gun attached to it, but it's still, it's still like a normal crossbow, it's not even like it's some sort of energy crossbow type thing. You can see the drawstring on the art. It's so good. Well, at least they probably fire like, you know, like you said, they probably fire anti-cyker bolts and stuff, like, you know, there's still a little panache to it, I guess.

be know, it should be specifically noted to that like, yeah, it's the Inquisition, but also you can take this in almost every, um, sister squad. Regular sister squads, the sergeant can all take a condemned her bull gun and, uh, so can be in the Ness. I could see the sisters rolling this. Yeah, the sisters would definitely be another one where it's like, oh yeah. Yeah, that fits their aesthetic. Having crossbows on their bolt or sure. I actually liked it. I really liked using them too. I just, I find them funny because sometimes you'll just roll up to like a, I don't know, Ks or something. And the next thing you know, you're like, well, they have anti-psychre two up and dev wounds. And, like, that's just kind of funny because, you know, if they're on every single sergeant, you might just be like, oh, you're just like six deaf wounds just kind of splattered around just for the hell of it, you know? It's kind of fun. Poor Kisans.

Yeah, they're doing really well right now. I don't care. Oh, are they doing really well right now? I got to speed up my painting then. I don't care at the end there. I mean, I shouldn't be one to talk. Sisters are also like maybe a top three army in the game right now. So that also is a thing.

But K-sons are sneaky, sneaky answers. Let's go. Let's go, Ksons. Anyway, next. Thank you next. Thank you next. So I did also want to mention, oh, auto heretics actually uses normal cross pose in the 2007 book. Wow.

just a normal crossbow. At least it looks heavy. At least it looks like it's... It's going to say, do they use it to beat people to death? Look at the state of that. A state of crossbow... You run out of bolt. Yeah, just whack them.

It's a specialized weapon used by the auto-ereticus when the crossbow fires, it fires a silver stake engraved with sigils that destabilized a psychist connection to the warp. Like, it's... I do... I like that it's specific in what it does. I would argue, though, that a bolter,

if you were to put similar sigils on what that fires. Or if you just fire a bolter at a psycher a lot, that would probably also work. But is it as cool as carrying a crossbow into battle on an alien world? No, it's not. So... You can totally engrave

bullets, can't you? Like, don't they do that in a lot of, like, sort of sci-fi... I don't want to say sci-fi, but like a lot of vamp. Like, don't they do that in Constantine? Doesn't he have bullets that are... Well, maybe no. Maybe those are just specially pressed. Isn't, I mean, if you look up, there's the, the chain-fed ammunition, each show blessed in the blood sacrifices of the dark gods. I'm sure there's enough.

I'm sure there's engraving. Yeah. You can absolutely engrave a bullet, especially considering how big the bullets in 40s. It's probably pretty easy. And we're not engraving 22s up in here. We're engraving things much larger. That's true. That's true.

Okay, we're going to talk. We're going to talk about, oh, hang in a second. Wait, wait, we have more quote. The impact of the stake against a cycle will not only cause a major wound, but it will cause his powers to go out of control, destroying the psycher in a storm of psychic energy. Oh, no. Let's make a fucking warp explosion that's much more safe than shooting a bullet to the head.

Oh, no, they make little controlled, they're making little controlled warp storms. It's not going to be that controlled, though, is it? No, because it's the war. Whoa, whoa, whoa, okay, back this up. In fairness, they do deserve it. It's true. It's true. In fairness, the heretic does deserve it.

You're right. How silly of us. That really, that's really giving me like the newer Jurassic World films. It's giving me that sort of energy. Make it a gun that, like, target people so that raptors can go and kill them. but the only time you see it used in the films is in a situation where if you just shot them once with a pistol they would have died

but instead they trained a laser on a person pressed a button and a rap to chase them around a city don't shoot the guy in the head don't do that no instead potentially kill them in about half an hour's time with matters of collateral damage that's way better same energy exactly the same I didn't even hear about that

because I didn't watch the Jurassic fucking movies I did it's terrible you don't it's not it's not they're not good. And the fact that they kept with the plot idea of we want to create a gun that fires velociraptors was stupid

the first time and it only got worse. So, sorry, but you saying those, that word did not make me assume it was a gun that sent a velociraptor to kill them. It was a gun that fired velociraptors. If they had

that, it would be a much better movie. GW, if you're listening and you're looking to make a new weapon for the game, raptor firing gun, except this one actually shoots out like jetpack raptors, right?

It's a raptor shooting gun, and Harold World Claimer comes out of the damn thing. It's a, it's a good point. She's a squid launcher. She's a squig launcher. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Although, it's the teleporter that teleports grots inside people's armor. Oh, the shock attack gun. That's, yeah, that one. Yeah, I mean, either way, I mean, 40K is already, got there. They've already got there.

So, so we've gone a little off the rails here. A little bit, a little bit. Just a smidge. Kereat, do you have more? We're going to do a couple more. I mean, to be fair, there are, there's so many of these that we would, we could be here literally all day. All day. Yeah, yeah.

We won't. I wanted to highlight a weapon called Veracity, because it's, it's again one of those really cool, like, not explained ones, which I really like. So, Veracity is also the sword of oblivion, and it's an execution blade that the Sissers of Silence use, and it was given to

Knight Commander Janisha Kroll by the Emperor, and in fact the Emperor did wield it himself, and the sword is badass, because it can cut pretty much anything, but there's no evidence whatsoever of any sort of power field, there's no power source, there's nothing to, like, enable it to be as sharp and deadly as it is, but it is a hugely dangerous weapon that is just a sword visually, but can do things that other swords can't do, which I really like, because there's no real explanation. It's just, hey, this is, this is like better than a power sword, better than a four sword. Why? No one knows. The emperor might do. He might know where it came from, but apart from that, no one knows. It's cool.

So it's just a really, it looks like a very big sword. Emperor once wielded it, so automatically that makes it like the best sword ever. I mean, surely. But it's also just a sword, though. Yeah. Is it just like made of steel? It's not like, it's not like obviously made of like a sterner stuff. It's just, it's just a sword.

It's just a sword, just a sword that can cut through armor, rock, you name it. It's just a normal sword that's, it's just a normal sword that's, better than every other normal sword made borderline. It's cool. Yeah, no frills needed. Just a big, cool sword that is a good big, cool sword. Yeah. Nice.

I would argue even cooler than the Emperor's sword, which you know, I mean, it's the Emperor's Sword. It's all flamy and impressive, and it leaves big trails of fire that burns things. But it's still not as cool as just a plain sword that can do as much damage but for no reason whatsoever. And doesn't Gwiler Man have Emperor's

sword right now? Yeah. I It took me a real second. I understand what the hell you just said. Well, you can't say his name properly. No, you can't. It's illegal. I have to admit, I've not heard Guiloban before. That's how it feels like you're one.

I haven't heard Guilermand either. That's why I was a little bit like, oh, okay. There you go. I have Merry Christmas, everyone. That's your early Christmas present. Guilera man. No, but, I mean, you know, I think that's the kind of the common.

concept, right? It's like, hey, it's just steel. How is it so good? I don't know. It's just it's all you need. Sometimes it's all you need. Sometimes you just need someone to be really, really good at making your sword extra stabby. Yeah, sometimes, like, you don't need a power field, you don't need the warp, you don't need a psycher, you don't need sigils. Hey, I just have a very well-crafted sword, period. Hell yeah. I think let's, let's finish on a proper legendary weapon. on like something that is almost as special as that sword. There is a weapon in 40K that requires a huge amount of self-sacrifice. It requires a level of cunning and of skill to use that is, you know, hard to match.

It requires someone to look at their situation and to properly go above and beyond anyone else on the battle. field. Because there's this thing called grot bombs where they just drop a thing out of an orc aircraft and a grot pilots it into the target and explodes along with the bomb he sat in. I have to be honest with you, once you said you got to be a little cunning to you. I heard that too. This is going to be an orc thing, isn't it? I was waiting for the brutal to arrive after that, but it never came.

Shy made, shy put you up to this, didn't she? To put a grot bomb at the end? Should I put you up to this? Just a tiny bit. Okay, that's all right. Ork stuff is cool. I mean, it is. It's the best.

I don't know about that. I mean, it's, you say it's the grot bomb, but I, like, you mean, we've talked about the grot bomb a few times, in fact. And it's, ah, it's so good. It's so good. They launch them from tanks, they drop them from aircraft. It's the best. I love them. Anything they can launch them.

launch him, they will shoot it from. Oh, there it is. I was looking for the right image, and this was the image I was hoping for. Look at him. Oh, yeah, look at that stubby little missile. Yeah. Look at him go. I mean, there's a grog missile in the new Warhammer

Speed Freaks. Yeah, you can do one of those. Yep. You fire him out of the tank. You know, the looted Lehman Rus. You can fire out a little grot bomb and you hear him go all the way down. Yep, yep. I would say there is one little, one

little added thing for these that it's sad but funny is the idea that the Ordo Xenos are barely convinced that the Gretchen just don't know what's going to happen when they actually get to the target. They're just being lied

to about what will happen when they get there. Oh yeah, they're like, oh no, don't worry, you'll be safe, you'll be safe. Yeah, it'd be fine, you'd be fine, just do it. It'd be fine. You'll get out and walk away. This isn't a missile. You're just going to land it really clean. Nothing's going to explode. You get out. You kill some you amies and be on your way

yeah. Oh, love them. Love grot bombs. And that's... I wonder who was the first... I wonder who was the first grot bomb to be launched out? Like who was the brainchild behind, like the... Oh, let's take one of these stupid little kits, put him in a rocket, and launch him at the enemy.

Like who... That sounds like a gas cult plan. I mean, that would probably be the smartest orc in that group at that time, right? Yeah. would be the one who's currently got, who's, like, in charge of the brain cell for that day. And, no, they had one good idea, and it stuck around. Yeah.

Yep. Yep. I like, I like the double up effect to that, though, is that whoever the first, the first grot bomb was, like, I mean, I feel like that would be something in grot history. Like, ah, yes. Good old, good old shank death, McStabby, B, he was the first grot. to ever go on the grop bomb and we honor his sacrifice. It's like, how did he die? Oh, he tripped getting in the bomb and broke his neck.

I also love that the name you came up with for him is totally something I could see an orc actually being named. I just grabbed every snazzy crap from the orc books and just like combine them. Snazy snake meeked snazy wagon. Oh, yes, of course. Yes, that is, yep, that's a canonical orc name for sure. Yeah, I'm sorry, I will say just quickly as well. the snows gun does get an honorable mention as well.

Actually, technically, the Grot bomb was my suggestion. It was the snows gun that was shy suggestion. Because the snows gun can be anything you want it to be. And I hear I thought the iron warriors were having the weirdest guns, but it's different for the orcs that's normal. So a snasgun is just like any gun that they just cobble together. It's just your typical. It's what you think of every orc gun being,

just a cobbled together mass of whatever the hell happens. to be in the junkyard that day? It's a very fancy gun that's made up of a bunch of other guns. So they just sort of put together all the stuff they would like to come out of one end, plug it into some sort of power source, or fill it full of some sort of

ammunition, whether it matches the rest of the gun, doesn't really matter, and then you just hold the trigger down until something dies, potentially you, but either way you've had a great time. Yeah, you have. And they're orcs, so it just works. It just works. They're Bethesda.

just works. I love, I love these. That might be my favorite. I cannot, shy. I cannot explain that. I really like that one because I just imagine like a snaz gun is a spacehulk, but of a gun. That's fair, actually. Yeah, bullet-bed plasma gun with a chainsword.

Let's not forget the targeting squig. Well, the targeting squids help them aim. Well, natural, I said let's not forget it. I'm putting importance on the targeting squig here. Okay, okay. I do love me a good cyclops. Oh, I'm sorry. I completely forgot that the plasma gun is actually an over-under-barreled plasma gun.

It's not even just one barrel. It's a double-barrel plasma gun. Of course, of course. Double-barrel bullet-fed plasma gun. Wait, the official name for the targeting squig? Oh, yeah, the Gitt finder. How could I forget? I'm so sicker.

You don't love me to get finder. The Gitfinder. Ah, yes. Oh, so good. Well done. Well done, bro. Well done. I found a git.

My squig found a gate. It's funny because, like, we could spend a whole episode talking about orc weaponry, specifically, like, orc artifact weaponry, because they all have funky names. But the difference is, is that very often they're not actually anything special. Like, like, don't, there's like that. Yeah, it's just another one of that thing. Yeah, there's like that one Gretchen, um, Gretchen guy, right? Who, uh, I forget his name like Zog Graar Wart Snagga or something like that.

And he, he has like the grabby stick and it's just like like a like a cattle pro not cow problem like a like a trash grabber. You know? Yeah. One of those things. And that's all it is. And I'm sure it's got some wacky crap to it. But it's just that's all it is like I'm pretty sure gorks, uh, or not gork um,

Gasco's weapons aren't like anything special. was just a really big claw and a really big gun. Yeah, it's just, it's just an upsized version of what everyone else has. And like, I think it's like, is it four guns just like strapped together, basically? It's four barrels. That sounds about right. I don't even think it's just four barrels. I think it's, I think it's four belt-fed barrels.

I think you take a photo of the gas coal mini. I think all four barrels are being like belt-fed. So he'll fire that thing for about. Six seconds, if even. And I'm out. And then before it is done, it'll be absolutely loving it, though. Oh, yeah, those are going to be a great six seconds.

Yeah. And then for Gasco, once you're out of ammo, it's like, oh, no, I got to go up close in person on a bunch of you. Like, he probably loves that shit. Okay, there they are. Look, every time I see that model, I can't get over the size of the power here. There are, yeah. His power claw is so cool on his thing.

It's just massive. Like, it's one of the best parts of that mini. Oh, love it. 40K minis are so strange. You get, like, the sanguinary guard refresh, and it's, like, just completely misses the point. And then you get that. Then you get that.

Yeah. Or then you get, like, all of the updates to the Dark Angels with, like, Asmodi, as we mentioned earlier. Like, have you seen the new Asmodai mini, um, a DK? I feel like I have, but I don't remember. it, so show it to me. All right, so this is the old Asmodai Mini. Oh, that's the new one.

Sorry, that's the new one. This is the old one. Wow, that is a significant glow-up. It is insane how good it looks. And it's still keeping the thing. And then you just, then you get the other weird ones. It's good stuff, though. Is that a fallen helmet or is that just a random chaos helmet that he's

stabbing his sword into? I would assume it's supposed to be a fallen helmet. Right? Considering what we talked about with Asmodai and his mercy switch. I would assume that's a fall. Anyway, Karioth, is there any other ones you wanted to hit or are we

I didn't that's an appropriate place to stop? We've covered some of the big hitters and the SNAS gun, which we've got the full range. We've got the full range of stuff. Honestly, this could just be like part one, too. We could absolutely do a part two into seven about

this. Yeah, I was going to say we could do a month-long series on this. Yes, I think maybe a third of what I've got listed we got to. So, yeah. See you next month for Part 10. There's a lot.

There's a lot. There is a lot. We'll see you next week for whatever Shai's cooking up. Shai's cooking up an episode idea. Let her cook. So we got some stuff going on. We'll find out if it's orcs next week.