Adeptus Ridiculous - Trazyn The Infinite - Here To Steal All Your Stuff (and also you) | Warhammer 40k Lore

Episode Date: March 26, 2021

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Welcome everyone to another episode of the Adeptus Ridiculous podcast. I'm one of your host, D.K. Diamantis, and this is kind of a special mini episode. What do you slurping on there, Bricks? What do you slurper on over there, bud? Are you trying to make a blooper reel out of me today? I was thinking because we're doing a bonus episode. I don't have to take it seriously.

Oh, well, sure. Why not? Sure. So this is indeed a bonus episode because our Patreon has been blowing up. I think the last time we mentioned exactly how much we were like, oh yeah, we're under 2000. Now we're at like 2,700. So schedule's changing a little bit. We're still doing the main episodes like once a week.

And then we're going to have sort of a bonus mini episode once a month. and then sort of a variety episode once a month where it's like a 40K game, uh, painting, building a mini, or something in that sort of general area. So if you enjoy the podcast, you enjoy the content that's been coming out, definitely head on over to patreon.com slash adept is ridiculous to support the podcast. Also new HD posters out, so, you know, subscribe for that. Anyway, today, special mini bonus episode thing, coffee slurping and all that. Hell yeah.

We're doing everyone's favorite man-spreading kleptomaniac. We're doing it. We're doing it. It probably is the most requested episode to be asked for. But you really couldn't schedule a full hour-long podcast on the singular man. So it's a little hard to get all that info out of it. I mean, we could just talk and meme around a bit, but, you know, as a- which we probably will.

But a bonus episode, I can't imagine being longer than 30 minutes, 30 to 40 minutes. So, but yeah. It's their man, Schrazen. Because anyone who names necrons will have an absolute aneurysm if they don't put like a Z and a Y or like an HK next to the naming sequence. I have noticed that with the necrons. Hought a little brain fart there, but it's fine.

Yeah, they got some weird names. Although all the names in GW were kind of complicated. They're a little weird. No one's named John anymore. Their names are like Alberto the four like like like mock monoc the regiment 42 imperial guard like it's always some weird crap Trindoc the flayer of worlds You know actually I'm actually kind of excited because I know shy wants me to well yeah also copyright of course But um shy wants me to list all the things that treason has in his collection

We'd be here for years if I had to do that But score for the heavy hitters, right? The big things that he stole. Well, I want to, I want, there's okay, so there's two, there's two places you can get your, your Warhammer lore, right? Mm-hmm. Well, there's a few. So there's like, your books, you know, your codexes, all the kind of stuff, the official

from GW sources. Yeah. Then you've got the wiki, the good old Warhammer 40K.fandem.com slash wiki, whatever. And that's where I get most of my stuff, because it's pretty well analyzed. It seems pretty true to the source material. It's still Wikipedia. so you have to take it with a grain of salt, but that's where I get most of the information

that I don't know about. And then you've also got 1D4CAM. Now 1D4Chan. Have you ever visited 1D4Cher in? I certainly have. So it's very not PC. It's very problematic, but it's funny as fuck.

And they tend to, even though they're meming, they do a good job if you want just like a nice TLDR. Yeah, they do. They are hilarious. Some of their entries are so fucking good. But yeah, very not PC. So there's unfortunately for me two lists of things he's stolen.

There's the list on the Wiki. And then there's the 1D 4chan list. And the 1D 4chan list is really long. Of course it is. I don't know if I'm truly going to be able to get through this whole thing. I honestly don't think I can. It's really, really long. It's like four fucking pages.

Did you see what Shai said? Trézon stole the gamer girl feet from the nids, apparently. He stole specifically the gamer girl thing. What's that? Oh, what's that smell? The sweet blood, it sings to me. I hate this. I hate it here.

I want to go home. Yeah. Okay, anyway, Trayson, let's get into this. Yeah, let's get a Trayson. Serious podcast hours, man. So Trayson is an overlord. He's Necron Overlord, and basically, Overlord, you know, it's like a captain or like, you know,

fancy, fancy man. You know, because all the necrons are a bunch of pompous dickheads, right? And so he's a Necron overlord, because there's like, you know, you got your lowly civilians, then you got lords and then overlords and the pharon. And so he's an overlord, and he is the self-proclaimed archa-o-vist of the Solem's Galleries in the Necron Tomb World of Sooms. All right. It's like S, it's like Solem, S-O-L-E-M, but then with an N-A-C-E at the end of it.

Solmnace, Solmes. So, yeah. Yeah, that's weird. I was going to call it Solem's whatever. Yeah. Easier that way. So he's a preserver of histories, artifacts, and events. and he quote unquote liberates

forgotten treasures from other species. So he's a douche. He acts like an asshole. He's not just a sneaky asshole like Necron Lord. He actually legitimately is kind of a pompous douchebag because to him he considers it. Okay, he's timeless, right? He's lived 60 million years

and so to him, because he went to sleep at everything. Yeah, yeah. And so to him, he's like, man, all these late races, right? All these lesser races have been around for what? A couple tens of thousands, a couple, like a million or so, give or take, maybe, maybe. Maybe. Like, and you're mad at me because I want to preserve your history for eternity? I mean, he is 60 million years old so I could see how he's just like,

Oh, you young whippersnappers, I'm doing this for preservation's sake. I'm not stealing. That's the Nevisor Zandrek way of it. I'm not a robot. What are you talking about? The Trazen... He's the best. He's just a stupid character.

Trazen, though, he like legitimately thinks to himself that he's doing the galaxy of favor. That, like, I am creating a giant vault full of artifacts and important things because eventually when your race is completely dead in dust, I will still be here and I got the stuff. I got the shit. Now, this isn't just because he thinks himself to be like a malevolent person or just makes him thinks himself to be like a great nice guy because he doesn't.

He realizes he's a dick and he knows he's kind of a kleptomaniac, but that's how he justifies it to himself. But he's also just kind of a fucking asshole. like most Necron lords are they're all just kind of duches so example he doesn't like to fight much he doesn't really like to go

and like explore the galaxy he loads the need for but he's got to get some good stuff yeah he's got to get stuff for the vault yeah and like how dare he not go out and see an opportunity that's important so often many times he'll actually have

other like lich guard which are like bodyguards or a lesser necron lord unbeknownst to them being like dressed up to look like treason to go out and get the artifacts for him and so often that one will die and they'll be like oh wow we killed treason but then it's just it's just not him it's just one of his bodyguard or it's one of its like lesser lords like a subservient employees that don't know what they're doing or sometimes it will be him and when he's killed he'll just like revert his protocols to a different body and forcibly take it over. Oh, no.

So even in death, he's stealing from people? And even in death, he's stealing from his own necrons. He's taking his buddies. Oh, no. What, he is such a douchebag. He's just like, oh, I've been killed. No, because he'll just take over your body. Oh, my God.

What a jerk. He thinks other necrons don't have the mental brain. They aren't intellectuals like Trayson. They don't understand that he is so important to preservation of the galaxies, you know? He should charge admission to his vault is what he should do. Like, he should make a show out of it. He should make like a, you know, like a Ringling Brothers vault parade out of it. You know, it's interesting, too, because his vault doesn't just contain artifacts.

It also contains, like, like, large, giant dioramas of battles in, like, holographic form. You know, like, for instance, Sometimes he'll have like this big, oh, here we go. Here's a great example. Like sometimes things get broken accidentally. But he's okay with some inaccuracies. Like he has one tenth of his death of Lord Solar Macarius, which is the death of like the main Imperial Guard war master.

His gallery is populated by holographic Imperial Guardsman that he stole. But their uniforms are like 300 years older than the historical fact. But he doesn't give a fuck because you know, it's like it's like ah The buttonhole is different who gives a shit right like oh well so long as I get this he has this giant holographic diorama of like this big battle against like orcs versus guardsman or something and it's like this is right here is where is where the Cadians fought off the orcs and planet C4 Zibbidazah Pay attention to kids pay attention to tours continuing let's go come on single file I don't know in my head I thought his vault was just going to be like, here's a display piece, here's a display. I didn't think it was going to be like full on diaramas and recreations of actual battles.

I mean, his vaults, his vaults like the size of a city. Like, it's a giant underground vault filled with God knows how much stuff. Okay. But like things sometimes break, like a malfunctioning conoptic, which like the little subservient things, might cause a problem or a firefight might happen because maybe something failed and then like they got out or maybe like ceiling falls. And in that case, he gets pretty angry. Like he's just like, ooh, my shit.

And so he has to go out and like get more. So he's like, he's kind of lazy. He doesn't like to leave and go get stuff. That's why he has those surrogate characters. But like that meme right there of him sitting in the chair, which by the way, that is entirely, I give GW some credit for that. That's entirely them embracing the meme.

because the whole Trazan meme is kind of done by the community. Mm-hmm. And then they release official fan art or official art of him in the Necron Codex with him in that chair. Him in that chair just spreading. Just spread. Like he just wants to sit there and look at his shit. He's like, ah.

Look at this shit. I'm so cool. Yeah. So there's a couple, let me, let me, let me tell you some great shit about, about Traisen. So he tried to steal the spear of Vulcan, which you remember Vulcan, right, Primark of a... So it's a special spear artifact that the Salamanders have. I think it's one of the artifacts.

Basically, Vulcan's gone, but the Salamanders believe that if they find like eight artifacts, he'll come back to them. And they have like... Vulcan's gone? Oh, he's not dead, but he's like kind of dead, but they don't know where he is. Oh, I was going to, yeah, I was going to say,

isn't he immortal or something? Yeah, no, he's like, they don't know where he's gone. Oh, okay. But like if they find all the artifacts, they'll come back. And I think they have like five or something. I think one of them is the spear of Vulcan. I might be wrong on that.

But it's this really big like flame spear held by one of the major guys in the salamanders. And he showed up and he tried to shank him and take it from the vault. And he actually failed and he got killed. So then he just teleported to a different Necron loram. And then he came back and tried again. And they got killed. He teleported back. And he's like, next time.

Oh, no. No, his poor Necron friends. Yeah, friends. I'm going to take over your body and go on the suicide mission. Damn it. I'll get another one. Oh, man. Damn it.

He's actually been banned from multiple Necron worlds. I can't imagine why. He's been persona non-Grada, quote unquote, from a large amount of different Necron Tum Worlds for trying to take their stuff. In fact, he's actually been banned from the main Necron world by Imitac, the Storm Lord because he tried to take Imitek's staff Of course he did He's got a

He's got a he did why not He's got this fantastic staff called the Staff of the Destroyer I sent you a quick photo of it That's that's Emmettick the Storm Lord and he's like I want it and then he knocked him off It's like fuck off Trayson go back home What a badass So that's a hell of a picture of him

Good God Oh yeah Emmetech is a Chad He went to the Silent King and he was like Fuck you He's like, he's like, you, you left us during our hour. You betrayed our whole race. You are a horrible leader. I would spit on you if I could.

He's, he's pretty, he's pretty, pretty chad, yeah. That's a pretty chad move. So there's a couple other fancy, fancy things Trazen's done. Let me read you a quote, okay? This is a long one. It's a big paragraph, but I fucking love this. This is from Trazen himself, addressed to Inquisitor Valeria. in a hyper-scroll message that he sent to a human inquisitor, he said,

Mm-hmm, mm-hmm, mm-hmm, ha, ha, ha, ha, dear lady, let me express my fulsome appreciation for your most generous gift. It is so very rare to discover another of my own kind that appreciates my work, therefore to find understanding amongst a member of another race is nothing short of a revelation. I realize that you briefly trod my galleries, but the fact that you, that you spotted in so short a time that my acabrious war collection was lacking three regiments of Katachin warriors reveals that you truly have an eye

for collector's detail. And to send five regiments, such generosity will allow me to weed out and replace a few of the more substandard pieces in my collection. If I might level eight minor criticism, the instructions issued to your gift were manifested not quite as clear

as you thought, as most of them had to be forced restrained. Sadly, it seems that the lower orders will always behave like an army of invasion, whether that be their purpose or not. However, this is a minor complaint and seems almost churlish under the circumstances. So please, allow me to repay your gift with one of my own. Accompanying this message is a hyperstone maze, once a series of Tessaract labyrinth constructed the height of the Charnovach dynasty. It is a trinkets, really, only of interest to scholars such as you and I. But I, but I do that. trust you will find it amusing.

Assuming you have the wit to escape its clutches, of course. Oh, no. What an absolute fucker. He's like, you saw I was missing some catachin and you said five whole guards in regiments to me. You're so smart. Thank you.

I didn't even have to go to you to get them. You brought them to me. Oh, how nice. Now here's a, here's a fucking infinite maze you can't get out. out of. He's such an asshole. What a fuck it. He just exudes asshole energy.

That, uh, there are a, um, there's a couple good parts of him. He's actually has a brief appearance in the Battlefleet Gothic, uh, game. Um, yeah, my, my meme I posted on Twitter, if I recall. Oh, yeah, the drip, Koku. Uh, yeah, where I did drip, treason. Yep, yep. Trayson, the infidrip. Yeah.

Um, he's actually voiced really well, too. But that's that song was talking about I think on the fall of Katie episode because that he actually has a big part in the fall of Cadia Okay, which is that's the big thing is like the Call and him are like you know they hate each other obviously But Trayson, but basically what happened is Trayson had this this special bell, right? This big ass fucking I think it was a sister's bell or something sister based and the bell rang 12 times or was a 13 times I think it may have been 13 times times right before Abadon attacked Cadia because it was this 13 Black Crusade. Okay.

And it rang 13 times. And this is a big fucking bell. This is like double the size of the Liberty Bell. This thing is like gigantic. And the constant like the constant blanging like broke a bunch of his shit. And he was pretty upset about that. So he decided to take the bell and throw it into the Eldar Webway hoping it inconvenienced them like it inconvenienced him.

Oh, great, great. Jesus, that's a huge bell. Jesus. It's really big. It just kept on ringing. But the weird part is that it shouldn't have rung at all because it was in a stasis field. Oh. So the fact that it rang is weird.

Like it shouldn't do that. It shouldn't ring whatsoever. So that should just started ringing on its own like he didn't like knock into it and it just starts ding bong it just started doing it on its own yeah i i think it was 12 i think it rained 12 times or was it three times shit geez that's a that's a mighty big bell to just suddenly start swinging around yeah it just started like oh here it is the bell of satan gershtal so yeah probably some fucking sister's thing i thought you were going to say the bell of satan i was like whoa whoa on the nose a bit uh but okay i'm not i don't quite remember the whole bell thing but all i remember is that

it, uh, oh, you know, it did have 13 times. Yeah. And then after 13 rings, it just like stopped. And he's like, what the fuck? What the fuck? This isn't like, this you shouldn't be ringing. What the hell, man? This wasn't in the owner's manual? And so that, that's what happened. He's like, that's so weird. Why did it ring like that? So that's what he ventured out of curiosity and you went to Cadia, um, in order to figure out the hell was going on. And basically, they probably would have lost without his help. They still lost, but you know, it would have been much faster

without his help. Right, right. He was quite the benefactor. He's got a great voice actor in that game. That game had some really good voice acting. Most Warhammer games do, actually. In order to get that like really I don't know the word, but that's super over the top vibe.

Oh yeah, yeah, yeah. He's pretty cool. I need to play more of these Warhammer games because they keep coming up and people keep telling me about like these really awesome parts on them. I've only played that space hole game and Vermintide and Vermintheid They mostly all suck

So it's okay I haven't missed much eh I personally don't like Battlefield Gothic's gameplay a whole lot But the cutscenes are like Are like the best And it's really pretty Yeah

They're the best But you want to hear about What stuff he has in his vault Sure All right Let me read you all the ones From the wiki And then I'll pick out a few of them

I can find on Winti-Fortchay to see if there's any good stuff So the memes We've got the Rathbone Choir From the Ursani craft roll That Altonzar Honestly I don't know That was fucking hieroglyphics to me

I don't really know what the Rathbone choir is I know what Rathbone is But I don't know what the Rathbone choir is So it's something Wait is that what they do to create Rathbone What did they have a choir sing And then just RITBORN? No it's like

Rathbone is like It's like Physical warp It's like it's like turning the warp into a physical substance that like a like a marble it's really

I need to research the craft world Eldar more because I don't remember this one I was gonna say that sounds dangerous well the Eldar is stupid he has the ossified husk of an enslaver which I believe is a creepy ass like other

fucking Zeno's race that isn't really around anymore. Okay. All right. He has the preserved head of Sebastian Thor. If you remember Sebastian Thor, he was the guy who led the charge against Doge Van Dyer during the age of apostasy. He was the guy who was like, fuck you, man. He was like the Martin Luther guy. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. He has his head.

He just has his head. It's just floating around like Futurama style and a, in a just a big jar of preservatives. Yeah, it's Ronald Reagan and Nixon. Yeah, it's perfect. He's got Brother Cassiel, which is a Blood Angels space marine, who has been frozen in a face of perpetual fear, and it tickles in pink because he gets to look at a space marine being scared. What a fucking guy.

There's several regiments of catachin fighters we mentioned. One of the shrines that contain the world spirit of Karnak, which was a, it's like a tomb world thing during the Carnic campaign under, um, Eldar bullshit. I don't know, man. Eldar bullshit. Eldar bullshit. Okay.

A device containing the entire high fleet that launched the tyrannian invasion of the world Veros, uh, because he wanted to create a scale variation of a, of a tyrann invasion as like a hologram. Okay. Um, good reason.

Lieutenant Commander of the Ultramarine Legion, a guy named Sarantis, and several of the dreadnoughts from the Horace heresy. Damn. However, they were actually released in order to help with the fight in Acadia, but they were all killed, so F. Oh, great. Fsen chat. Big F's in chat.

Lost regiments of the Imperial Guard from Tanneth, which is actually super cool, because Tanneth is the main guards. regiment from Gaunt's Ghosts, which we might do the book club for. Oh, okay. We also have multiple regiments of the Vostroian Firstborn, which is more guards. A single member of the Adeptus custodies. Really? He's got a custodian in there.

He's got a custodian. How the fuck did he get his hands on that? I don't really know. That's not the point. I was like, of all the things that could stop him from, you know, his kleptomaniac ways, you would think a custodian would be near the top of that list of people that you don't get to fuck with. Normally you don't, but he's a crafty little asshole.

Apparently. What else? The Astardis of the Salamanders chapter, he has a couple of them. He originally had the Puritan Inquisitor Catarina Grafax of the Ordo Hereticus and a bodyguard of tempestus Sions. But they were released during the fall of Katie as well. They actually lived. There's actually a wonderful novel about St. Celestine of the Sisters of Battle

and Katerina Grafax, which is an inquisitor called Our Martyrid Lady. And it's about them to fighting off like a chaos threat. It's actually really, really good. A perfect clone of Fulgrim, Primark Fulgrim of the Emperor's Children, that sliced off Ferris Manus's head. He got, is a perfect clone of him, which he received in exchange for 18,000 samples of pure gene seed with another man named Fabius Bile,

which is a chaos mad scientist. Oh, so he, wait, so he's dealing with chaos a little bit here? He'll deal with whatever the fuck he wants if he feels like it. Oh, yeah, apparently, Jesus. How do you make a perfect clone? of Fulgram exactly. Like, how does that work? Man, I don't know. It's Warhammer. All right, sweet.

There's a perfect clone of Fulgram, and Trayzons got it. He's got it. He's got a full clone of non-C Chaos Fulgram. Actually, I don't know what he would be like right now. Because current Chaos Fulgrim is a demon primark. Looks like a big snake. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. But, yeah, he dealt with Fabius Bile. Fabius Bile is the dude who's like, hmm I'm gonna wear a suit made of skin

and I'm going to like put some drugs in these chaos Marines and see what will happen so yeah he's a little bit weird he was an apothecary which is like a medic for the emperor's children at the time and now he just kind of does his own thing he's kind of a dick he's got he's got a fucking skin trench coat though so he's kind of boss

they used to call him fabulous bile because of that It was skin trench. Oh gosh, I just posted the pic. He looks a lot cool than I thought he'd look. He's pretty cool. I mean, that actually probably does him more justice than it should. He's pretty nasty. That's a dope picture.

It's pretty dope. It's actually super dope. This one I'll send you as more like him. As you can tell, is a screaming face on the bottom right-hand corner of his suit. I'd like to just look at the other one. Thank you. All right, perfect. I don't like the one you said.

But the number one thing that Trazan has that I think is really cool Is he has Lord Casolin Usakar E. Creed Which was the Lord General and the last castelin of Cadia. Creed is like, we'll talk about him a little in the Guard episode That I guess technically already came out because Recordings before Guard episode. That's true. Fuck.

I know exactly what you're talking about. Yeah, uh-huh, ha, ha. We definitely aren't recording this one day before the guard episode because we ran out of time. Yeah, that guard episode was a real killer. Go check it out. You should remember him from the guard episode. Yeah, and I do, of course. He's a fucking boss, dude.

He's super cool. We'll talk about him. We talked about him. Anyway, so that's a lot of the major shit that he's got currently in his fault. Let me tell you the stuff I have on 1d4chan real quick. An actual orc sniper. A copy of battledoads. Of course.

Caiaphas Kane, hero of the Imperium, missing fingers. The Silent King's sanguineas mask. Robot Gilliman's body pillow of Yvrain. Yvrain's vibrator, ultramarine sanctions. Oh, God. An orc that doesn't want to fight Clearly canon Clearly all canon

Samus's armor from Metroid Prime As many cat girls as possible As long as with a selfie of each of them What a, that's culture What 100% reliable information On the Alpha Legion A certain Swell guy

A certain swell, is that a meme, I don't know. I think it's Carn the Betrayer. Yeah, it's Car and the Betrayer. Swell guy, that betrayer. Swell guy. A garage with each of the Imperial Guard tanks. Abadon's arms.

Oh. I'm assuming Abadon is missing a couple arms. No. Abidon's old model was horrendous to put together. And so he was always known as Abadon, the armless, because his arms wouldn't work, And so a lot of people just played him without arms So he has his arms Okay

A jar of scub What's scub? Later Oh no Oh no Not important, this doesn't matter What else do we got here? There's so much bullshit

It's once 1D4 or whatever Let's see Gretchen who is stronger than an or an or Oh Somehow A clear, accurate, unedited photograph Of a diglet's body Oh no

Okay Okay Oh Oh, you don't know who kidding is You haven't watched text of speech yet Mm-mm God damn it God damn it

I don't know The Golden Throne of Terra Oh no The Emperor The Emperor Oh no An actual Pokey ball with a caton in it

That's actually pretty good I get that reference because of the previous episodes I get by that's funny Yes The Statue of Liberty Okay go ahead Sorry

Statue of Liberty An undisputably good Codex from any faction Oh that's The best pole dancer in all of the Dark Eldar And finally, the ham personally provided by Ordo Drago. Another thing you don't understand, but everyone else hopefully will.

I don't get it, but sure. Listen, the comments will be like, yeah, I get that ham. Yeah, you know when you see like a Reddit thread or something or any thread, and it's just like one answer and then every other answer is the same answer as that answer. Oh, yeah. I'm hoping this one would just be like, yeah, I get that ham. It's just all that. I need to make sure I'm the first person on that video so I can type in, yeah, I get that ham.

Yeah, I get that ham. And then everybody will just copy the one person that doesn't know about the ham. So yeah, Tracy's fucking great. He's got a couple of battles. I want to look at real fast. If there's anything in particular that is fun. Most of them are pretty, you know, here and there. I like one of my favorite things

is there's an aircraft called a night scythe and a night size is like a transport aircraft for the necrons often if he needs to grab a few things he'll just like fly it really close to the ground and just like suck him up like old school UFOs and a cow I mean

if you gotta steal stuff quick I guess that's the way to do it he just goes like that's it's done He's got his big suck flyer That's, you know Sure, why not? I know he's got a lot of different battles that he's done here

But honestly, we don't do much about battles to begin with One thing I would really recommend though Is that there's another book that stars Trasem Called the Infinite and the Divine And it's about this one guy called Orkin the diviner I don't remember if you mentioned Remember him, but he was the only guy who said Let's not do biotransference because you can like see the future

Oh yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I do make they remember him. It's the two of them doing like a buddy cop adventure. And Orican is like, he's constantly once up ahead of Trazen because he can see the future. And Trace is really fucking upset about this because he's just like, give me a shit. I, sure. There's some really good stuff like that. It's apparently quite a good book.

It sounds like it'd be a hell of a book with those two just constantly. going at each other like that. Trazan is such a fucking weirdo. I love it. He's such a weirdo douchebag douchebag. It's great. He's a kick.

Oh, I totally forgot. The Tockren crusade. Trayson the Infinite claims to have discovered the song of entropy, one of the missing artifacts of Vulcan instigating a decade-long war between the salamanders and his necrone forces, which he actually turned out to be a lie

just so he could lure the Vulcanistan, which is the chapter master, into a trap so he could steal a spear. Wow. He started a decade-long war based on a lie so he could get the spear from another dude. Yeah, the second time he tried to get the spear

was when he did that. The first time he failed, the second time he's like, all right, I got to lure him out. And then he failed again. What a fucker. What an absolute fucker. He's such a, he's such a complete shithead.

And the best part about Trazen is that like, you could make up a bunch of crap with him if you feel like it. And it probably could be canon. They'd be like, yeah, yeah, one time he played a poker game with the emperor himself for his throne. And he only lost because the emperor was using psychic shit and he's cheating. Sounds canon. Yeah, sure.

That sounds about right. he's got a like a weapon called the empathic obliterator which is a staff where when he kills an enemy like a shockwave of mental energy goes through other like-minded individuals and cause them to like just so he'll like kill one guy and a squad and the whole squad will just die oh shit that's a hell of a weapon

yeah it's pretty good for him but he disdains combat with inferior beings of flesh and blood so normally he just tries to stab him with other stuff if he can even though it'd be so much easy to just Blap. Yeah, he's just like, I don't want to be here. I don't know. Dude, this is dead. The sun. I don't, let me go back to

play Minecraft. Just want to play my games. Just leave me alone. The, um, he also has these things called mine shackle scarabs. Which he has these tiny, tiny little robot scarabs that bury into the victim's head and bypass their cerebral functions, turning them into a puppet.

Ooh. So what he did, what he did that to all the people on Cadius. He was just kind of walk in and chill him alongside like a bunch of ultramarines that physically couldn't fight him. Oh, boy. He just kind of sat there next to a bunch of ultramarines and they had their bolters in hand. He's like, sup, bitch. And the ultramarine guy is like foul zino scum, but he like couldn't lift his bolter to shoot him. And he's just like, ah, what have you done to me?

Jeez. I mean, with weaponry like that, it, I mean. Wait a minute. He should be fighting more. if he can mind-shackle you and then mind-shock you to the point where anybody connected to you dies too, why doesn't he fight

more? Is he really, is he really just that lazy? Oh, well, no, he needs to implant the scuribs into their head. It's more like a way to keep you from getting out of his vault and stuff. It's like, you can't just like do it. Okay, I thought they were like little like, uh, I thought they were almost like little drones that would skitter around the ground and then find

someone to just be like, boop, I'm in. Um, I mean, maybe, but probably a little hard. I actually just thought of something too I completely forgot about this and then you made me forget about it again because shit I was like wait a minute

and I don't remember anymore oh well we were talking about how we should fight more and then the skittling balls oh no I remember now dude he fucked up the ultramarines oh shit did he and they didn't get away because he he got multiple separate lieutenants

and guys from the ultra-mobile Marines and a bunch of their 30 Horace heresy dreadnots stole the mall captured the mall vaulted them and then in the fall of Kadia he unleashed the mall and since Kadia fell they all died The Ultramarines are gone

The injustice is over I love it when a story ends with the Ultramarines getting fucked Yes! Nice! Yes! Nice one Yug! Fuck you! Way to go, Yug! Yo, I'm going to send I'm going to send all the instructions of all of my cards if you win

Ryan to Trayson's vault because if there is intelligent life we should teach him how to duel. It's my favorite Kaiba moments. You've seen that Kaiba moment, right? I have not seen that Kaiba moment. There's a moment when Kaiba's like you can enter my competition and whoever wins just design a card that will go on my Kaiba Corporation rocket into space.

Because if there is intelligent life, we should teach him how to duel. How did I miss that? Have you never, you've not seen that? How did I miss that? What the hell? I never seen that. All right, all right, homework. I used to watch Yu-Gi-O-2.

All right, homework for all of our viewers. Go on YouTube and look up that scene. It's the best. That's your homework. You will be quizzed on it. There will be a test on this. All right. So, my dude, I think it's about time we stopped this.

one now, uh, your boy's actually off to go get vaccinated. Oh shit! Hell yeah, brother. Go get it. Papa Nergel ain't got shit. I'm a Slynesh boy now. Hey, look at you. Look at me.

I'm gonna look up some Warhammer smut.