Adeptus Ridiculous - You've been LIED TO about KHORNE | Warhammer 40k Lore

Episode Date: November 26, 2025

https://www.patreon.com/AdeptusRidiculoushttps://www.adeptusridiculous.com/https://twitter.com/AdRidiculoushttps://shop.orchideight.com/collections/adeptus-ridiculousWe are getting our axes dirty diving into the lore history of Khorne. While often cited as the "honorable" Chaos God who hates magic, the history of his lore is a moving target. We analyze the texts from Warhammer Fantasy Roleplay (1986), Slaves to Darkness (1988), and the Renegades expansion (1992) to pinpoint exactly when Khorne changed from a god of mindless destruction to a god of martial prowess.Support the show

Welcome, everyone, to another episode of the Adeptus Ridiculous podcast. My name is D.K. Diamantis. His name is Ricky. And, oh, look, it's a wild carry-off. But before I get into that, if you enjoy today's episode of the podcast, and maybe you want to support us, head over to patreon.com slash adeptus ridiculous, where you get access to the Discord, bloopers if they happen, $15 tier, get you access to all of our posters in crispy, digital, whatever format it is format. It's great. You'll love it.

Patreon.com. Adeptus, Ridiculous, Bricky. What's up? You know, it's Monday, man. It's Thanksgiving week. You, ooh! Oh, God, it is, isn't it? It is.

2025 is almost over. Aren't you happy about that? I mean, I don't exactly know where 2025 went, but, you know, time marches on. It does march on. I will say, despite everything, the horrors, I persist. Hell yeah.

I thought you were going to say, despite all my rage, I'm still just a rat in a cage. I mean, I could do that also. I could also do that. You know, I, I, black up seven. You still carry on. You still go, date to day. I got, I got a buddy, right, who's, who's pretty high up in the games industry. And he's, he's like, hey, you know, I'm not, because he's a little jaded.

And he's like, you know, I, there's a good chance that that wasn't AI. could just be like a terrible, terrible team because I've seen some awful writers. And I'm like, I totally agree. I totally agree with you, ma'am, but not this time. Not this time. It's, it is different. Anyway, I love, anyway, I love Warhammer. It's really cool and it's got a lot of really cool stuff.

And I can't wait to talk about a good thing today as opposed to more War of the Beast. Well, we don't know. if it's a good thing we're talking about today. True. This could all be a lead-up to Kirith being like, here's the worst thing that ever happened in Warhammer's history. That is true. That is true. Let's talk about the...

What a lead-up that would be. Kirioth, we got to do an episode of the Grey Knights, like, killing a bunch of sisters and dobing their blood on their armor. At some point, we've got to do an episode on that. Oh, boy. I feel like, I mean, it would actually be quite fun, but it still doesn't make it any better. No, it really doesn't. A fun thing to talk about, not a fun film to read when it happened, you know? I feel like there's a few things like that in Warhammer.

But you know what? I will, you know, advanced, advanced sort of spoiler for the quote, because obviously we've got a mystery quote. It's not, it's not beast related. So just, you know, you can. Slaughter. Slaughter. I will say the word slaughter is used in this a few times. Possum has legitimately started censoring the word slaughter.

Like in the text. I'm imagining it's just S and a bunch of asterisks and you think he's saying something far worse. Obviously, you don't need to read this. I do. Possum wants us to be safe. Possum wants this to be a nice place where we don't have to. the word. So even in the text, it is censored. So just, you know, bear that in mind as we go forward with this one. So, uh, I'll give you the mystery quote. I walked across his meadows

beneath the brazen sky. All about were fields of black flowers. Each a shade trapped in death. Each bloom a twisted face. Each leaf, a tiny skull. Each stem, a spine of tiny bones. Crimson flecked flies sucked at the nectar in the corrupt fiends and the air was filled with a stench of despair that is metal as hell I'll just point that out That's so metal

This sounds like corn's domain Right? Because it's like you got skull flowers You got you got a little red Everywhere You got a lot of death This has got to be like some kind of corn's domain deal Right DK you have absolutely

nailed it. Holy! Yeah, just kind of built different. All right, let's not, let's not go too far. Bill Darren, because he built stupid. No, you are absolutely spot on. So we have done episodes in the past where we've talked about how you've been lied to about Nurgel, how you've been lied to about Zinch, and today, this one is in the same vein

but slightly different. So the exact title for this particular episode, well, I say episode, for the script for this episode, is you have been lied to, but may have been right also about corn. Because it turns out it's complicated. So this is the latest in the propaganda series

for chaos that we've been doing. And, you know, well in advance, boy, games workshop did some sort of flip-flopping on corn. There are some U-turns in here that are absolutely full. fascinating to read in hindsight. So it's been some time

since we talked about the true original law of the chaos gods. The first time we did it, the podcast turned into a Nogel cult whilst Bricky was gallivanting around England. Then we went into the

often overlooked sorcery gallivanting. That man was gallivanting. Holy- Do you gallivance sausage rolls and stuff? Hey, it's Edmy Bap. Thank you.

100%. Yeah. that. Galvanting. Great word. It really is. Then we went into the often overlooked sorcery aspect of Zinch, and now we're going to get our axes a bit dirty as we dive into corn. With the other gods so far, we've found that they emphasized one thing in the past,

and then embodied something else in the modern era that ignores that past a bit. With corn, one might immediately think that the trait that got wrong, really disregarded over time has been the honorific aspect of him. In fact, when me and Possum were talking about this, I said to Possum, people keep talking and complaining about how he's more about raw violence nowadays. But here's the thing. Corn was a lot more cut and dry back in the day, and there are many aspects of corn nowadays that are more accurate about him in the past. And even that is not fully accurate either. Corn is the biggest moving target when it comes to old law. So there's a good chance that you truly have been lied to about corn, but you may have

also been spot on about him the whole time and told that you are the one lying about corn. See, this is what happens. Are you sure this is an Azinche episode actually, like in disguise? Rips off the bandage. It's like, ha ha. No, I mean, this sounds about right. Games Workshop likes to flip-flop on their stuff. Plus, you know, the whole 30 writers thing and yada, yada, yada. they're, you know, they're well known for picking a, picking a lane and sticking with it. Wait. Yeah. Okay.

Said no one ever. Yeah. Good and evil is a matter of perspective, fleshy to the impaler of the mud, haunts. Pretty, pretty smart, to be honest. Yeah, yeah, you know, good old Abram Gaunt versus Alacath, the child Flandzer. I really just don't know which side to pick. It's just a matter of perspective, man, you know.

So in a very contemporary sense, we look at corn not only as the blood god, but also is having a degree of honour, a degree of a wretched counterbalance to mindless bloodshed. The idea of corn having some sort of a code or following some degree of a doctrine or martial pride gives him some grounding, especially when it comes to the gods that he hates the most. He is generally put at odds directly with Zinch for a few reasons. The first being that Zinch uses magic. Corn despises magic more than anything else.

The other aspect is the trickery and backstabbing that goes hand in hand with Zinch, and this plays into the idea of code and martial prowess most of all. Being honour bound would be horrifically at odds with the idea of deception and trickery. However, there are some aspects about the two that are still. still kind of agreed on overall. The first, and most obvious, is magic, to an extent. Corn doesn't like magic, but he and his followers are still intertwined directly with magic, whether they like it or not.

Enchanted and Enhanceded Blades are very common when it comes to combat, and this does go against the idea of hating all forms of magic. Plus, let's be honest, warp-fuckery that results in a gigantic demon appearing, whipping blades of fire, that's magic. It is magic. Yeah. I'm assuming, you're referring to magic in the sense of what we as like the 21st century mortals assume magic to be, random shit coming out of the place, right?

Like people being summoned from things. Yeah. Whereas like, like a corn demon is not casting fireball, so to speak. He is the fireball. Yeah, he is. screaming so loud that everyone's heads like explode. Yeah. Which can be considered magic, right?

And how many, they live in the warp, which is just, you know, magic. Roiling. Yeah, like, if you're defining magic in that way. I remember there was that one thing where like a bunch of, um, I forget which story that was. It may have been the anger on Ox of Omen, but like a whole bunch of, um, of like ecclesiarchal preachers were like screaming and yelling and getting angry and angrier. And then they all like, like, like randomly turned to like, brass coffins to shout their anger or like they were either put in brass coffins or their

skin became brass as an effect of their anger from the warp and like that's very magical sounding you know it's also extremely scary in a very corn-like way i don't know there's something about the idea of like a brass like brass encasement or i guess it's playing on the brazen bull thing of just being trapped and unable to escape oh oh hey Corn unleashed murder curse, aka rage virus, on an entire imperial fleas, which is entirely magic.

Yes, yeah. It's a magic curse that makes, yeah, yeah. There's some minor hypocrisy going on there. It's fine. We don't need to... It's also a chaos guy. He's not exactly known for, you know, I'll just play by the rules 24-7. Oh, 100%. Now, you could break it down a bit further and say that he doesn't

like sorcery more than he doesn't like magic, and that's a bit true, but to be an entity of the warp and to manipulate the living is to partake in some form of magic. So the hatred is still marked with a pretty heavy asterisk. The second... Hates it, but we'll use it to his advantage if he has to. Yeah, yeah, it certainly feels that way. The second has to do with deception and backstabbing. Let's get something out of the way now, shall we?

The favorite champion of corn by a very big margin is Khan, whose title is... The betrayer. I guess, well, you know, I was like, yeah, Carn the Bich. Oh, that, yeah, no, I see the, I see the segue you're making here, and that's fair. For, you know, for someone who's not a fan of betrayal and backstabbing, your chosen champion. Captain, I love flamethrowering my own people. Yeah, well, you know, there's the weighing scale. He cares more about the murder than how the murder is created.

Corn cares not from where the blood flows, right? Actually, that's a good point. He wasn't backstabbing. He was betraying. He was clearly face stabbing very hard. Oh, yeah, right in front of their face. Yeah, there was no trickery there. It was, yep.

it's less of a measured sort of I'm going to go behind these people's backs and more going into a blind rage that caused the world eases to fracture into a group of war bands as opposed to a unified legion. On a similar note, we can look at Scarbrand, who is also very well known for an act of betrayal and treachery against Corn himself. In fact, backstabbing tends to be pretty common all around. Temporary allyships between Cornate forces usually end with the killing of the ally whether the ally knows that it's going to happen or not. Again, this is something that's a bit fast and loose as well. Backstabbing and deception have some grey areas between them that are flexible when it comes to Corn's doctrine, but it still does get another big heavy asterisk.

With all that being said, though, we can look a bit deeper into the relationship between Corn and the god that he truly hates the most, which is actually Slanesh. And before we go deeper, Possum wanted to share a pretty funny bit from the 7th edition Codex of Demons of Chaos from fantasy that really shows how they are at odds with one another. You know what? This says that I should read it out, but I'm going to give that job to you instead, D.K., sorry. Oh my. The other gods are attracted and repelled by Slanesh in equal measure. Nowhere is this shown more clearly than when the dark prince presented each of his brothers with a chalice.

Beguiled by Slanesh's art, Nurgel and Zinche accepted the chalices of entropy and lies, glad, despite themselves, to be worthy of the dark prince's attention. Corn, on the other hand, could not resolve his wrathful nature with the peculiar attraction that Slanesh aroused. He smote the chalice of war a mighty blow, shattering. it into a thousand pieces. Yet even as the broken shards tumble to the ground, Corn felt compelled to gather the fragments together. For many days and nights, corn worked to repair the damage he had wrought, but when the labor was complete, the rage waxed strong within him and he shattered the chalice once again. A child, the blood god has since recreated and destroyed the chalice of war untold times

as unable to let the pieces lie as to graciously accept the dark prince's gift. What a baby. Taking this, my ball and going home. Yeah. I don't like your toy pool. Breaks it. But then, pretty nice.

Yeah, it's, it's such a, it is such like an impulsive. I hate, I hate this person. I'm going to smash it. Oh, but it was, it was really pretty. I should put it back together. Finishes putting it back together. Now, fuck that. Break sake.

Yeah. Too true shy. Corn is obviously Sundari. Yep. Yep. Yep. What does that work mean? Should I know what that is?

You know, it's probably better that you don't. I mean, it's nothing bad. Don't worry about it. It's exactly as we have described it. Yeah. Do I need to impart this knowledge upon you? No, and I will therefore not. Yeah.

Don't worry. The chat is rolling over laughing. It's fine. I will continue on in ignorance. as I largely do throughout the rest of life. So it's been almost always established that corn is permanently at odds with Sarnesh, but they are fairly close in a few ways, especially if you focus more and more on the martial honour and pride aspect.

Both of them love their violence and the thrill of battle, of course. At their core, Sleeneh is about the indulgence in prolonged pain, though, while Corn is about the indulgence in prolonged pain, though, while Corn is about the indulgence in immediate death, but it's still ultimately indulgence from the same source. When we get into the idea of martial prowess and honour, we also step a bit harder into a major blurring of the two. Sticking to a martial code is a means to strive for some form of perfection, as the only way to be unwavering in your code is to be a perfect example of its embodiment. The same can be argued when it comes to becoming a master of your weapon and your battle prowess.

honing in your skills and becoming the greatest and most brutal with a blade means that you are, in a sense, embodying a major degree of perfection as a concept. Even though there are odds with one another, the means of embodying corn does, in a sense, feed Slanesh, whether corn likes it or not. This is not part of the script and it's not part of looking at corn overall, but this is one of the things that makes me excited about us looking at Slanesh in detail, because the whole excess and perfection thing is so wide-reaching and encroaches on everything else. Like, Slanesh is in a way the most broken chaos god because if you, even if you're like Zincian and you're an absolute master of deception and trickery and you can pull off, you know, perfect maneuvers to manipulate your enemies. Is that not? Sleney loves that.

Yeah, like whether you're brilliant at poisoning entire worlds, there's a degree of pride to be taken in that, that's Sleeneh. Whether you can just butcher hundreds of people with little to no effort, there's a degree of perfection and pride to be gained from that. And it's obviously excessive and excess is the whole thing. It feels like Games Workshop basically went, Sleesh is the god of excess, and then probably about six months later went, oh shit, oh no, that means everything.

Oh, God, what do we do? Uh, give everything eight, eight tits. That'll do. Sure. Yeah, I mean, I guess, I guess because if you're referring a little bit more towards the perfection side of things, right? And so, because I do, I do see this, the excess thing to be a little bit more, um, I don't know. Like, specific.

Yeah, because like, oh, oh, you know, obviously like you want more of something as cool, but like excess is not more of something. It's like excessive. but the perfection thing is insanely broken because everyone wants to get better at the thing they're doing. Oh, of course. Yeah, nobody's just sitting there idling around. But, yeah, Slanesh is quite literally the, I drink your milkshake. I drink it up, God.

Yeah. I mean, I guess in a sense it's like, like, I wouldn't imagine that the every single person in the populace is an excess person, you know, but obviously all the other chaos gods are because it's either an excess of like murder or trickery or like power and like yes and etc it definitely does kind of show that in some way slash is kind of underserved when it comes to the excess side of things I mean really the only thing I can think of that is properly a display of excess is one of the age of sigma characters I think it's called glutus maximus or something and no way oh no have you not seen this it's great no Okay, mild tangent, I've got to show you this because it's such a good model.

And I think it might be one of the few times they went, you know what? It's not all about sex. Maybe we can have, there we go, it was a glutus or scullion? Sure. Is this their actual name? Yeah. Oh, my God.

Fat lad on a massive, like, palanquin. Whoa, that actually is a hardcore model. It's sick. It's really sick. It's so good. And it's an aspect of excess that you just don't see from a lot of the Sla Nash scopes because that... You know, I will agree with you on one thing. So I actually think the excess on the Empress Children is actually pretty good.

I like all of their weird, like, vials and their stretched skin and some of that nature. I think it's pretty cool. That's fair. So, because like noise marines are an excessive sound, right? And like, even though we can't visually see it, we, we know that it's like loud as shit. Yeah. Um, you know what they aren't doing enough of though, I think? They, like, because Nurgle has a, a monopoly on fat dudes.

You know? That he does. Like, Nergo has a monopoly on, on the chunkers. And I, like, the big chungas, as they say, um, they do say that. And like, if you're going to be doing, just shut up to you. Um, If they're going to be doing like excess, like I feel like we need a lot more big ass, large ass lads. Yeah.

Yeah, 100%. Like, I think about that. Sleenech has been like bottlenecked into just being like everyone assumes it's like, oh, that's the sex god, right? It's like, yes, but no. Well, see, that's the thing is I was thinking that too shy. Like they have the giant planet. It's just a big fat guy. You know, which was like, kind of neat.

And I feel like if you're going to do excess, you know, that includes, like, food and stuff of that nature. So I don't know. I kind of, I like gluttony is a very, very slanesh sin. Oh, sure. I don't know. I kind of wish they would go a little bit harder with that. You know, they try to, I think it's because they try to make them all look sexy. And normally people don't consider obese people to be sexy.

You know, just that general vibe. But like, oh, I like that dude's sick as fuck. I know we didn't actually read the Emperor's Children book It was the Lucius one But that one they presented them as like Oh yeah, it's an excess of like Oh, I need drugs

I need these euphoric drugs I need all the drugs Give me drugs And that was sort of their Pursuit of perfection And Lucius wanting to be like perfect And yeah It's not just sex and you know

Yeah fuck Lucius ma'am Yeah fuck Lucius We hate Lucius To be fair Lucius is one of the most annoying characters because his whole thing is... Because he backs it up. But does he...

I hate it. No, no, no, no. So, no, no. No, Lucius, before he was the Eternal, backed it up. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. The dude was a really good duelist before he became Eternal. Now, he's just a shithead that's barely even Lucius anymore,

if even, who just dies a bunch. Yeah, that serves to be killed. That's, that's my main issue with his whole character arc. It's like, on the surface, a guy who, even if you beat him and takes some pride, like, he then almost reincarnates through you. It's like, oh, that's horrifying. That's awful. But then when you look at it a bit more, it's like, he's the best swordsman and best duelist in the universe. Oh, wait, he loses constantly.

It's just if people are like, oh, I did that. They lose anyway? That's not the mark of a good warrior. That's just bullshit. It's just, which is very chaos, to be fair. But for some reason, that feels more zinche than Slanesh to me, whereas like, oh, he's so good, I keep bringing him back. He's not that good if he's wearing armor covered with a thousand faces of people who've beaten him.

That doesn't make him good. Yeah. That part's true. That part's true. I'm referring to, like, Isvan massacre type stuff. Yeah. Yeah. It feels like he should have to, like, perfectly kill you to, like, absorb your skills or something.

And it's like, wow, his armor's covered in, like, soul and. soldiers and it's like, oh, fuck. It's because he absolutely shlaughtered those people. Slaughtered? I didn't want to say a proper, man. It's a censored word. Oh, good point. You're so right.

You censored it and we fell for it anyway. Anyway, speaking of slaughter, speaking of slaughter. So when it comes to Korn and the opposition to Slanesh, what if Honor wasn't on the table? Well, for quite a long time, it wasn't for Corn. So Corn is one of the oldest deities in the history of Warhammer and has been around in some way or another since the early 80s.

In the first edition of Warhammer Fantasy roleplay in 1986, we get the first real clear picture of Corn. Oh, dear God, I read that and I was like, oh, that's my birth year. And then I went, I'm going to die soon. Oh, I don't know why. I just feel like, I just feel like I became aware of my age in real time. And I don't like it. I don't like that we're in 2025 and it's nearly over. That's really upsetting.

Oh, no. Poor Gary not just having an existential crisis live on this episode of Adeptus ridiculous. I just felt like the size and weight of the universe in like three words. You're feeling like Fabius Bile when Sir That was looking at him. Yeah. Zingh got to him, everyone. Zinch is real. This is a Zinch episode actually.

Jesus. Okay. So, in this book, the gods of chaos are listed as Nurgle, Lord of Pestilans and Decay, Malal, the renegade chaos god, and Korn, the blood god. His description is two and a half sentences. Corn is the blood god, the angry and murderous god of chaos. His great brass throne sits atop a mountainous pile of bones the remains of his followers who have died in battle.

He is obsessed with blood and death and is the power behind the first armies of chaos which rampage across the edges of the old world. Now we're going to get into the real meat and potatoes of this episode with the description as presented in realms of chaos, slaves to darkness in 1988 in a little bit, but one thing to note about it right away is the following. Honor is never mentioned in it, but something else is.

More on that in a bit, so we will return to it. So we all know by now this supplement was built as an add-on for both fantasy and 40K, and it had two bits to it. The first was Slaves to Darkness in 1988, and the second one is the Lost and the Damned in 1990. Slaves to Darkness was Corn and Slaneh, and Lost and the Damned was Nurgle and Zinch. but in both volumes, both gods are mentioned throughout in random passing lines. The Lost and the Damned has the first real mention of a dual nature on the gods, but it's presented as an example and less of an explanation. It states that chaos powers exist that typify redeeming characteristics

like fellowship, charity, law and other redeeming characteristics, and mentions that Corn, for example, along with violence and bloodshed, has inherited the warrior's sense of honour and mind. martial value. Now, this is followed by saying that Nurgle embodies the human hope and energy that defies the inevitable. The operative words here are inherit and embodies. Nurgle embodies the polar concept, whereas Corn inherited it. If corn was something that truly existed to fully own the concept of martial virtue and warrior's honour, it would be a bit more explicit and it wouldn't be kept at such an arm's length. In 1992, we get something a bit more explicit that covers it

from a pretty unlikely source. In the epic Space Marine second edition expansion Renegades from 1992, we get some clarification on corn. In this book, Corn is still described as sitting upon a brass throne, but he specifically sat upon bleached skulls instead of just random bones. skulls still have his champions that have been killed but skulls nonetheless. The more of his champions are killed, the higher his throne rises. He is described as a fighting god of anger and destruction, and his champions and demons are the most potent warriors of them all. Then we get the following description.

That is the hardest swing in the honorable direction imaginable. So, here you go, Bricky. Yippee. Corn is a noble warrior who respects strength. and bravery, who takes no joy. My dog is on me right now. Good God. Get out of here.

Get out of here, man. What are you doing? She's shaking her ass. Mortar, stop. He's got to read a quote. You got to stop shaking that thing. Your dog can't be twerking during quotes. She's twerking during the quote.

She's twerking during the quote. Damn. I can't believe her. As soon as I started that, she walked in here and started shaking her ass and telling me to throw her toy. Okay. The hell you can't your dog to do, by the way. What the hell, Bricky?

What are you training her dog for? Listen, she's a little special, okay. So, Corn is a noble warrior who respects strength and bravery, who takes no joy in destroying the weak and considers, what the hell, and considers the helpless, unworthy of his wrath. It is said that fate will spare any brave warrior who calls upon Corn's name and pledges his soul to the blood god. It is also said that corn's demons will hunt down and destroy any warrior who betrays his honor by killing a helpless innocent or murdering in cold blood.

Corn's great delight is battle and the spilling of blood. Wait, okay, there's a lot of inconsistencies here. Yep. Yeah, there's a lot to unpack in that quote. Yeah, that's, huh. that's that's quite the swing i mean it's pretty up there right in terms of what we know about corn now that is that is very explicitly it's all about honorable combat you can't very much cares from where the blood flows yeah he clearly does care that is very strange very much cares yeah it's it's

crazy how different that is to what we know like just the line like corn care is not from whence the blood flows only that it does. Like, that is not the same as what that quote is, not even remotely. There is discernment, there's, like, purpose there as well. There's a defined, like, honour code going on. It's pretty wild. So, as you can see, that's a dramatic pendulum swing

that turns corn into less of a blood god and more into a god of noble war. In another two years in 19, 1994, we'd get the same description, but with some pretty in notable changes. This was for the release of the second edition of Adeptus Titanicus named Titan Legions. Once again, brass thrown on bleached scores of champions, but here's the excerpt immediately after. So here you go, D.K. Oh, Khorne only respects strength and bravery and considers the helpless or weak worthy of nothing better than a swift death.

There we go. It is said that fate will spare any warrior who calls upon Korn's name and pledges his soul to the blood god. It is also said that Korn's demons will hunt down and destroy any of his champions who betray his honor by fleeing from combat or avoiding battle. Yeah, a little different. That is a little, a lot difference. Just a smidge. It's one of the things that I think makes games workshop super interesting when it comes to like, just like writing as a thing.

Like if you think about fictional series that you've read or fantasy series, sci-fi series, I feel like the vast majority of the time, if within two years of a book being written, an author then wrote another book that almost completely changed the context or contradicted their previous book, you'd go, what the hell is this? What are you doing? But, yeah, Games Workshop was doing that all the... Two years.

Literally, 1992 to 1994, corn goes from you do not kill innocence, you leave them alone, they're not worthy of it, don't touch them, to...

I mean, just kill them quickly. It's fine. Yeah, that's the best thing you can do for them. It's just knock them out, quick. Yeah. Yeah.

You know, don't waste your time on it. You know, get it over and done with. We're all good. Just don't run away and we're fine with it. Like, that's a significant shift. Yeah, it went from being a useless thing that you shouldn't do to, I might as well just fucking destroy them as quick as you can. That's a 180.

And this is why this, I'm really glad we're doing this episode. Because it's like there are so many contradictory things about corn where you can go into any sort of discussion about corn and there will be someone going, yeah, but he's got honour and doesn't like the killing of innocence, all the way to everyone should die and it doesn't matter. And they're both right.

Yeah, picky year, you spot on. Like, that's pretty much how it's gone. So instead of considering the helpless, unworthy of his wrath, they are now worthy of nothing better than a swift death. and now killing a helpless or murdering in cold blood have been removed from the honour that could be betrayed. From there it would be further reduced in the second edition 40K chaos codex where it would say that Corn's followers may feel they can justify these deaths

through honour, bravery or pride. But the true worshippers of Corn know that he only desires the S word in his name and the reason is meaningless. So when it comes to corn, this has been a moving target for ages and it still exists as such in many different ways. So now we're going to get into the true pure essence of corn in the slaves to darkness. No honour, no prowess, no justification, pure violence. A top... Pure violence is a weird...

Like, there's a phrase, it's only two sentences. It goes hard and I don't know why. let's say it's important because you got to say pure violence because if you don't say pure violence you're going to say the S word and we can't have that it's not on we're not having that anymore on this podcast atop a weirdly carved throne of breast that rests upon a mountain of blood-stained bones sits a muscular monstrosity hundreds of feet tall

he is clad in plate armour of alien design covered in a repeating skull pattern throughout on his head is a gigantic winged helmet that covers almost the entirety of his face what's visible is a face that is bestial and snarling this is corn corn is the embodiment of chaos due to absolute violence and mindlessness everything and everyone within reach of corn is to be destroyed he is described as the huntsmen of souls who drives the chaos armies before him his followers delight in the slaughter and the bellowing of his rage and delight echoes through the void.

There are no temples to corn. In the traditional sense, battlefields are his temple, and the construction of an effigy to him would be a waste of time, because any time used to build such a thing could have been used for killing people. Hell yeah. Despite them making effigies of corn often. Holy shit, is that a picture of corn from Age of Sigmar? That looks like that one, is it Dark Souls picture?

Oh, God. Is the dude hanging, hey, hold up to the, you know the one, right? Yorm the Giant? Yes. Oh, yep, yep. The guy against the giant giant. Yeah. Dark Souls 3.

I mean, a little bit. I mean, they've shown, like, artist renditions of the chaos gods quite often. But, like, there is, they are formless. Like, we don't, they don't have a technical look. they just have lots and lots of like art like concepts for the most part. A majority of corn I've seen is just sort of like, oh, look, it's Satan. I don't believe that's canon 40K corn. I think that's the, that's the emperor's tarot.

I'm pretty sure. I think it's what emperor's tarot card. Yeah. Rug. Shrug. I'm pretty sure it's the emperor's tarot card, hence the card form. No, okay Chasseh, no he's not

No, he's not. Let the googling begin I'm just stupid. Citation, Eden. I'm just still being salty about being reminded as to how the art for Yorn the Giant made him look absolutely insane and then the actual fight was

and I mean this in the nicest way garbage. It was just garbage. It wasn't fun. I didn't like it. And it was a blight on an otherwise very, very good game. Just saying, Yorms served better. I killed Yoram with a katana.

I just took so long to do it without the soul and it was so boring. It was just so dull. Oh, that one. No, I do remember that one. Yeah, they give you like the special windsword or something. Yeah. That's why I forgot because it was just one of those. Oh, yeah, it felt like a throwaway fight.

Yeah. They could have at least made Storm Rule a fun saw to use outside of that fight, but for some reason... It's terrible, yeah. Yeah, they just... From ourselves got a habit of going,

we're going to introduce something that could be kind of neat outside of this one niche scenario. But actually... Well, so they did. They did an Eldon Ring. It was against the snake boss dude. They did the gimmick fight,

but it was good that time. That's true. Actually, yeah, what was it? Rickard. Was it Rickard? Yeah, right. Right card. Yeah.

To get out. That guy. Yeah. Yeah. What guy. Oh, man. Next time on acceptable loss is Eldon Ring. Oh, God.

It's going to happen. I mean, it'll be like a. Any number of Dark Souls games. Sources cited all the Vatty video videos. Maybe we just email Vasi video and be like, please. Would you like to be on an episode? Would you like to be on 100 episodes of the podcast? Or we just buy his book and read it out loud?

I'm joking, we're not going to do that. Anyway. Anyway. When it comes to corn, every single life taken by one of his followers increases his power. But he does pick favourites too. He favours those who takes the lives of their own allies or their own friends. The more death and destruction a creature has caused in life, the more welcome it is as a sacrifice to corn in death. Any one of his followers who lets a single day go by without contributing to the S word will face the great disfavor of corn.

The followers of corn do not have any friends and even fewer acquaintances. All her affiliate with a corn follower are nothing more than an inevitable sacrifice to the blood god. Even another follower of corn may try at any time to offer their lives to the blood god. Allies may be around for a short period of time, but a corn follower knows that all other beings fear and hate them and will seek to kill them first. So obviously, those allies need to be killed as soon as possible. How anyone gets anything done as a follower of corn is a miracle. frankly. I mean, your to-do list as a corn follower is pretty simple.

So it's not like, it's not like you got a long workday of like, oh, man, I got to take the kids to school, got to get the, got to get some email sent out, got to find time to slaughter for corn. Like, it's, you got one job, brother. Look, I need you to stand there for a minute whilst I reply to, whilst I reply to this company and then I'm going to stab you in the neck. Is that okay? Sure, I find.

Listen, listen, spending time on Cox Communications, technical support will have me stab someone in the neck regardless. Oh. Why did that bring you here? Mortar, what? What are you teaching that? Do you want to stab someone in the neck? Do you want to stab someone in the neck? With a fucking knife.

What are you teaching that dog? First, it's twerking at you for quotes, and then you say cox and it comes running in. Bricky, what are you teaching that dog? No, it was murder. It wasn't about cox. Oh, okay. It is interesting, though, how, like,

because I'm very often to talk about, you know, because it is weird having the world eaters being able to function. And it is occasionally difficult because sometimes, like, I feel like you, read the World Year books and they end up functioning just barely. But then you will occasionally have the World Eaters types of stuff where they're mentioned in books about other legions. And they're always like barely functional. It's like, oh, yes, Abadon brought in his fleet.

And then the five World Eaters cruises would full throttle directly past everyone and then rammed like 10 imperial ships and all died. And then the coronate berserkers were in flying space. into the air swinging their chain axes anyway like it's just shenanigans. With those it's more of a miracle that there's any left? Like how have the world eaters survived this long when generally speaking it comes to okay we've got a big fight. What's your plan? Well we're going to run at them face first.

Oh no, this is in space. No, no, you can't just run out of them. This is in space. Oh, we're going to crash our ships into their ships. Okay, and after that, kill everyone. Okay, and what do you do after that? I'm sorry, what's the question? I don't understand.

We're going to run in and hit them with the chain axe. That's what we do. Yeah, but after that, no, I'm still, I'm just not understanding the after bit. Like, how are any of Corn's space marine follower still going? We don't know. Plot armor, imagination, teleportation, we don't know. I honestly assume they plan things. Yeah.

I mean, I mean, it is just, it's bizarre. I think it's this fact that like, at least with the orcs, because I said, yeah, you can promise more murder somewhere else and then they'll kind of get together. At least with the orcs, you do the same thing, but then they, they die and then grow back up really, really fast. whereas the old veterans the long war do not do that. Yeah. And Shai said, we are flanderizing them a bit. They do use tactics a decent amount. They are not all drooling idiots.

They can become drooling idiots. Like, it happens to Carn all the time where he's just like, what did I do? Oh, you just murdered a thousand people on a war rampage. Oh, okay. But he does still use tactics sometimes. Yeah, Karn the Betrayer, murdering Alicia or um uh whatever crawl jenicia jill yeah the sister's silence lady and just seeing his ticker goal

yeah jenicia jenicia crawl that's it thank you so upsetting she just gets obliterated just nothing it's like insanely powerful warrior a null everything and then just nope bye it's very it's very bizarre because it's like well they're not all drooling idiots no but some are some very much are drooling idiots and it's it's like

it depends on on who's one in charge and two who's writing them I was gonna say it's another one of those depends on the writer's needs right

I will say Janisha Crowell getting absolutely annihilated is in the same vein as the as the word bearers trilogy where it's one of my favorite tropes from

not just 40K but the kind of more like grim, dark fiction as a whole, where you'll be introduced to a character that is super powerful, and they just wreck everyone, and they're untouchable, and then they'll come a point in the series or like the trilogy or whatever, where someone else shows up and just absolutely obliterates them instantly. It's like, oh, oh, it's that sort of universe. Okay, cool. Like, she, she is insanely strong, she's insanely skilled, she gets wiped out. Same thing

with the word bearers trilogy where it's it's not Marduk, I can't remember the name of the guy but, you know, he demolishes another space marine in close combat a chaos space marine with no armor, no weapons, he obliterates one of the white consoles, I think it was and it's like, oh my God, this guy's so strong

and then he just gets cut in half by a Grey Knight Terminator just kills him, just outright murders him instantly and it's like, oh, there we go. I mean, a Grey Knight Terminator is going to do exactly that. Oh, yeah. It's the ever-increasing scale of, this guy is insane.

Oh, wait. That guy is insane. Oh, wait. And then, and then look, it's the grandmaster of the great knights. Oh, look, Logan Grimnar absolutely slashed him. That guy is insane. Yep. Yep.

You know, also, Shia mentioned about Lord Invocatus, the guy who rides the juggernaut, and he has a hidden-roth attacks on. flying fire dogs. It's not even just that shy. In either the world leaders codex or something similar, I think they're fighting like either like Ravenguard or Raptors or some kind of offshoot of that, some kind of stealth one. And they have a bunch of like storm rate hawks and various kinds of like space marine

flyers. And then they're like fighting the world leaders and they look and like because they're fighting Heldrinks and stuff. And they're like, what is that? And in the sky are like rhinos and land raiders and other. kinds of troop transport and tanks, like, driving in the sky on, on trails of flame.

It's like, like, a landerator, it's like someone just picked it up in like a game and just started making, like, plane noises with it. It's absolute horseshit. I love it so much. Oh, God. Also, insane model.

It's so good. I love that. It's... Mm-hmm. Best helmet for the world eaters, hands down. Anyway, so, earlier, we mentioned that Honor is never mentioned in this book, but something else is.

There's something else here is a code for corn. The code that all followers of corn follow as a tenant is very simple. Blood plus more blood. Using spells or other similar powers to cause death and destruction are abhorrent to him, so don't do that, because he's very unlikely to deal with ever. anyone that has ever used magic,

we'll ignore the entirety of the Dawn of War series for the purpose of that. But even if you have, you can still gain favour from him. How? How do you reckon he gain favour? Go on. Is it the S word?

Sure. It's killing people. It's the S mode. It's murder. It's death. You've just got to keep up the numbers. If you keep up the numbers, he might ignore the whole magic thing,

but once you gain his favour the only way to incur any displeasure from him is by not killing. So again, you've just got to keep those numbers up. But let's say that you're a sorcerer that is unrepentant or a particularly powerful wizard.

Congratulations, you are less likely to be killed by a follower of corn. But there's a reason for that. If you're lucky, you'll die outright. If you aren't, you're taken deep into the realm of corn far below the throne itself. Wizards get promoted to forge worker, perpetual slavery in the darkness of the forges, used to enchant weapons and nothing more.

And dying in the forges isn't really a long-term holiday either. The tempering of a blade requires blood to quench its thirst, and souls are needed to stoke the furnaces. So even in your total obliteration, you still have to work. Damn. I love how you're like, oh yeah, even in death, it's not a total vacation. It's death. It turns out corn is invented late stage capitalism. Wow.

So we're going to go through some of the corn units at this point. We're going to start out with bloodthusters, and this is from slaves to darkness. So there are many servants that are loyal to corn and his simple devotion, blood for the blood god, and the most loyal are, of course, bloodthusters. Or, you know what, I'm not even going to attempt. I'm not even going to attempt it. Whoever gets closest wins nothing except for my undying pride and respect. There you go.

Holy shit. Go on, off you go. Kakakas, kiss kakami. My wife. My wife. My name is Jeff. Oh, no. No, do you think we're wrong?

Curiaf? What did you go with Kiryoth? What did How was mine? Honestly, I think yours was pretty good. There's no pronunciation guide for this. And yes, I did check.

It turns out no one wants to read this out loud for obvious reasons, because what the fuck is that? Like, occasionally you'll see something in a 40K or fantasy book from Games Workshop

and you'll go, that author was fully taking the piss. 100% they were having a laugh Yeah, you don't write that going This is an important I'm a serious author Yeah You're sat there and you're going

How can I make this as stupid as possible? Yeah, sure, we'll go for that I mean, even if you try to Kaka Kaz Kashkiami I don't know Look Bloodthusters That's what we know them as

We're never going to use the actual name again because it's trash. So they also have many other names, including fists of corn, drinkers of blood, lords of skulls, eaters of gore and flesh, deathbringers of corn, blooded ones,

that's actually quite cool, Guardians of the Throne, which just sounds generic fantasy, and high-handed slayers. Regardless of the name, many aspire to join their numbers. Their existences for combat, nothing more and nothing less.

The bloodlust that fuels these abominations extends beyond mortal comprehension, and a bloodthirster will attack everything within reach of it. Literally everything. They have no fear other than a primal fear of corn and will act regardless of consequences. Because, more often than not, the only consequence involved in a conflict with a bloodthurster is the consequence another creature encounters by facing a bloodthuster, which is that they die horribly. Correct. I was going to say, wasn't there a pretty famous bloodthirster that was like, oh man, I'm not even afraid of corn. I'm going to go try my hand at him.

And it's like, yeah, yeah, that's scar brand. That's scar brand, right? Yeah, he got thrown. He got, like, really thrown. And his wings went all ragged, so he can't fly. But he's still a badass because he outgrew fear for corn, which is wild. That's pretty impressive, yeah. The balls it takes to take a swing at corn is crazy.

Well, I mean, he definitely took a swing. I mean, nothing was going to happen except his eternal damnation, but to have the gusto to even take a shot. A hundred percent. At corn? He got like backhanded 10,000 miles or something ridiculous. When corn hurled Scar Brown across the warp, where he flew for eight days and nights, obviously, leaving a blazing trail of destruction across the realms of the Codds.

Scarbram's landing carved out a massive canyon and tore his wings to shreds. God damn, does that many look cool with the shredded wings. He's a bit dated. I would like an update, but he does still look cool. Mm-hmm. He's got some, he's got, he's neat, but I don't know. I think he's just cool because having, like, tattered wings on the devil with two axes.

It's just cool looking. Doesn't matter what it looks like. Hell yeah. Okay, that awe is sick. Oh my God. The one where he's fighting Gileman. Yeah. What?

Yeah. Yeah, I imagine, I mean, I know the world eaters don't care. Like, like, like, not mentally, but I can't imagine the feeling it must be to, like, have the dude carrying the emperor's sword start charging you. Like, that's just, that's just spooky. terrifying. That's a perma death. That's not like oh, we'll just go back to corn, he'll bring me back.

No, no, no. You're dead dead. Apparently, unless you're scar brown In which case you're like, hell yeah, let's go. Doesn't the Emperor's Sword, doesn't it kill demons? Is it like anathema? Yeah, that's a, if you get killed by the Emperor's sword, that's a perma death for a demon, right? I thought it was. Maybe Scarbrand is just built different.

I don't know. That is true. I mean, Scarbrand isn't scared of corn. and corn is his god. So I'm going to go ahead and guess that he doesn't give him shit. He's there. He's just like, oh, perma death. Sure, you got to kill me first.

Corn Berserk was the first one to attack Gilliman after he woke up. Oh, that's true. Yeah, one of my favorite moments is when Gilliman wakes up. And then the room all goes silent. They all look at him. And they just see, like, you know, the prodigal son. And then a corn berserker is just like, yeah and then jumps at him

and then I'm pretty sure he like bisects him up from the balls to the head and then and then and then shit just gets real again oh what legend they really they really uh gave they really kind of upped gilliman they really didn't they really made gilliman a much a much more interesting character I'm happy for it mm-hmm yeah so bloodthursters stand taller than a man with a rangy muscular build which Rangie being like a tall muskier build, like a basketball player, presumably.

Bloodthursters are the LeBron James of Chaos Champions. They have hooves studded with claws, tough membranous wings, and a face like a horned dog. They are covered with crimson fur and have white eyes with no pupils and horns that look like black iron. Next up, we've got blood letters. So bloodthusters are only the champions. The bulk of Corn's demons take on a much lesser form, which is the blood letters. So here we go. Wait, no, I've lost track again.

I'm bad at this. No, this one's me, I think. Okay. Their baying chills the heart and spreads icy tendrils of fear through weak mortal souls. And yet worse, yet more terrible to behold, are the huntsmen of this fell pack. Following close upon the hounds, urging them ever forward, come deformed beings. running and shrieking, shrieking and running, driven by the sateless bloodlust of their kind. With twisted crimson frames, they speed across the blighted land, crouched over as if the better to track the terror spore of their prey, also known as the corn dog.

Hey, didn't the corn dog Karenak, the three-headed cornhound? Well, that's the corn serberus. Oh, fair, fair. They're also known by this, which I think is Kakamshire. Sure. Dude, I don't, I don't know. The old blood letters, by the way, used to look mad.

So, they used to have... I mean, the new blood letters look mad, you know, always. They used to be all like S-shaped and weirdly twisted and like their bodies were not right and I'm trying to find I thought you said S shaped like you were saying slaughter shaped

and I was like well yeah Curia off obviously Oh Oh they look like they look like Zichy and Flamers What the hell? Yeah they used to be really freaky Really freaky

They look like red versions of those Yeah, yeah, go ahead. Yeah, like elongated spines. The horns went back really far, but they were very smooth. Like, they're also a mix of hooves and claws in the units. They were weird, really weird. They looked like those aliens in the coffee room from Men in Black. Oh, no.

You got too far from me on that one. I don't remember that one. Oh, they do as well. Really? You don't remember the... Oh, no. It's been too long. All right.

You know what I mean, Kierreth. You got it, right? 100%. You mean you don't watch that film every year? They absolutely were the Georgia Binks of Men in Blackshy. You're 100% right. I'm not saying they're good characters, but that was the first thing that popped into my mind when I saw those minis.

Yeah, no, I hate to say it. I think you're dead on. I think you're dead on. They do look like that, but with knives. They actually do look like it. Oh, no. You're welcome, Kerry. They don't exist anymore, though, right?

Oh, yeah, no, you can't get those anymore. They're like the old, like, pewter models. Oh, no. Like the cheapest madly you can find. But now I'm never going to be able to see them again without thinking about all the aliens in the coffee room. Just got a big bunch of S-shaped weirdos. making jokes about how

shit Will Smith is. And I just don't like that. Yeah, I too prefer. I had to print an AI Will Smith for a shirt. Oh, no. Yeah. Oh, God.

Blackop 7. No matter what you do, you can't escape it. You know, even deep into an episode of a Warhammer-related podcast that you can't get away from it. I'm watching from death. Oh, that is a horrifying gif, and I don't know how to hide it. Now you get it. Is that the shirt you had?

Oh, boy, that's unfortunate. Yeah, Jesus Christ. Also, I too prefer sexy bloodthirster shy. Yeah, absolutely. So the blood letters or the Kakam Shire or whatever, an idiot name they're also known as Corn's Chosen

The Teeth of Death This one is It's suss as hell I don't know why This is an actual accepted name The Naked Slayers Well they are I mean it's no armor

They're just It's not an accurate I refuse to I refuse to Comment on this in any way shape of forms can move on. Not having it. It's like, no.

They're also the takers of skulls and the horned ones, which I mean, is accurate. I mean, it's no more accurate than if you call bloodthirst as that, but sure. They are the rank and file units in the armies of corn. Only the greatest of his mortal followers

can become blood letters, and only the best of those blood letters can be elevated to bloodthuster. They'll attack any foe without fear, and often ride into battle on giant steeds, screaming high praise to corn in the process. They're as tall as a man, but with their crooked frame and their weird body, it makes them seem lower to the ground. They are wiry and slender with very long arms and sharp scales on their body. Their scales tend to range from a dark red to orange, and their faces are skull-like.

Through razor-sharp poisonous teeth, you can see their long. long black tongues, but the more notable thing would be the hell blades. Iron and brass stained red. These blades are embedded with magic, but only for the sake of combat. Though they ride in on horrible steeds, they are also accompanied by wretched hounds. The flesh hounds. Now, for God, you know what, whoever wrote this lot? Stop. Stop it.

What is that? You can't, don't, what? I don't, I don't know how you decide to be like, oh yeah, K-H-A-A-A-A-A-postrophe A, apostrophe A. Like the other one's like, oh, look, I'm being quirky, but, uh-a-a-uh, bro. It's just garbage. That's just hot garbage. Whoever did that, no. The kha-ha-h.

Like, what is the pronunciation for that? I would do you pronounce it, kha-ha. They really like their K-H around here. They really do. They're like all the Necrons stuff too. Mm-hmm. I get that it's corn. Corn is K-H.

That's fine. That's okay. I don't mind that. But you don't have to stick K-H at the front of everything to do with corn. And apparently you do. Do you stagger the three A's? The K-A-A-A? Or is it?

A-A-A-A-A-A-A. It's just one, like, how long is the noise? The car. Or do you want to go like the, like more sort of breathy, the car? Cash. Like what, what is it? I ate it. Oh, man.

The Kirillaz crash out. Just great. Look, English was the only thing I was good at in school. And to see it abused in such a way, really does my head is. It's what you in the UK called passing for English. Ooh. Oh, Kiroz is choking. You killed him.

You killed him, Bricky. I watched Snatch recently again, so I love that movie. And I forget what it was, I forget the name of the dude. is like, uh, English, boobby. I thought this country invented the fucking language. No one seems to speak it. No, Bucky's got blagged recently. I mean, it's fair.

There's literal podcasts that I have listened to and had to give up on because they are from a hundred miles to the south of me. And as such, I don't know what they're saying. Like the slang, the accent, all of that. I'm like, they could be talking French and I would have about the same idea. I'm just going to have to give up. So, luckily for us, corn is about 100 miles south of you. So continue with ca, cacus.

It sounds like text to speech is having an issue. It's the main thing. So the flesh hounds are also known as the beasts of corn, the flesh renders, hunters of blood, and inevitably. Bittable ones. That's hard call. Oh, manless hell. They will fight to the death for their master, and they are trackers without fault. Pursuits done by these beasts are endless.

They will not stop until they find their prey, and as they track, they are followed by blood letters that egg them on, by shouting and screaming, ready to take a stab at whatever the fleshhounds are after. This forms what's known as the chaos hunt. So again from Slaves to Darkness, We've got fleshhounds and juggernaut. Fleshhounds are basically canines, but in a, this dog is fucked up, bruh, manner.

Was there, was that possible? That's a technical term for it. Okay, that clearly was Possible typing there because I never, when you're curious, so this dog is fucked up, bruh. But a direct quote from the shit. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I had a feeling. I feel like POSA may have gotten you and me confused in that one,

because that's something I would say. That's not something to hear of those say. So they average at about eight feet long from nose to tail and have an arched posture. They are covered in rough blood red scales. Shy, come on. And their most striking feature are the spine ruffs around their necks that have a bit of an orange membrane to them. The membrane is some form of fleshy protection when it comes. to counter-attacks. Iron plates are driven directly into the flesh along their back, and they are

held in place by rivets with corn's skull-roon on them. Outside of their fangs, the fleshhounds have two-toed feet that have two razor-sharp claws of iron on the end. The fell steeds of corn are the most striking, however, as made note in the following description. So, here we go. beast. The like of it has never been seen. He came upon a mighty steed of groaning iron and brazen steel, a thing of living metal that stood taller than a man and roared with all the furies of a thousand dead. He sat securely proud in deep saddle that grew out of the very back of this accursed beast. It's high posts framing a massive head, part hound, part bull, part the incarnate soul bloody hate. As it came towards us, we saw its thousand close-rivided plates,

forged in dark fires and bound with ruins. Its breath was fear and its every step set a thundering knell of doom. As it bared its brazen, gorse, speckled fangs, we lost all heart and turned, fleeing for the safety of the night and terrors unseen. Thanks, Brickie. Thanks for breaking silence. You're welcome. Thanks, what an ice break. I do my best. I do my best.

Wow. What a thing to come back to. Having kids distressed was fuck. I wouldn't recommend it. Not even close, brother. Not even close. We'll see. Oh, no, we don't need little bricks running around, man. Hey, fuck you, man. One brick is enough. Oh, my God. No way.

Wow. Wow. Wow. Man, come on. You got to say that, right? Are you really friends if you don't make that joke? What an odd thing to say. How did Adeptus Bidiculous end? Okay, so.

Yeah, get back to this, Kiriard. Come on. Jesus, Cario. Look, I could only take something. There's so much responsibility for what just happened. So we've been through how to pronounce the fleshhounds of corn. But, oh God, wait, no, these are different. I got discombobulated because of distraction.

God's sake. So the mighty steeds we just discussed are the juggernauts, which are... Which are these? Oh, hang on, I missed a bit. No, there we go. There we go. So, wait, what's it between those and the fucking hounds? Hang on.

No, the hounds are the little dogs. I mean, like, corn name-wise. Like, so the juggernauts are the big armor-plated lads, but. Yeah, no, so they still have the prefix of ka-a-a-a-a-ha. The difference is that these ones are kha-a-ha-h-h-h-h-as-posed-to-kak-hish. Thank you. Come on, dude. Keep up.

Keep up. Oh, no. Oh, man. This is the second time this episode, you killed him. Why do I keep killing Kira? This is abnormal. We need him, man. You can't keep getting away with this.

Now we got to wait for his respawn timer. God, damn it. Jesus. Oh, my God. I was ill for like three weeks. I can't, I can't laugh like that. It just destroys my lungs.

I'll try to be less funny. You've got, you've got to dial it back. You've got to tone it down, Ricky. You're too entertaining. Tile it back. Clearly, clearly.

I need you to reduce it down to the average level of a 40K YouTube. And I'm, I'm joking. I'm just, I know, I'm just, Jesus. Jesus,

right. I was going to say, tone it down to, you need to be on my level here, Bricky. Oh my gosh Today we're going to be talking about the siege of wrecks

and the munition amounts of 400,000 shells and how this is a grave mistake by Games Workshop 400,000 shells is not nearly enough shells for the siege of her. Continue. If you're wondering how they fit

that many shells into one gun, simply watch the clip from the Black Op 7 review where 80 18, well, it's got Too much self-promotion. Too much self-promotion. We're moving on.

Move on. Is it self-promotion if Keriath is promoting you, though? Yes. Now move on. Is it? I'm not getting anything for that. Oh, wait. Sorry, hang on.

Brown envelope. No. So also not, that seems like a weird reference. Do you do brown envelopes? Never mind. Also known as this isn't true. Juggers. No way.

No. That's a possum. That's a possum. That's a possum being a shit. It has to be. Yeah. Blights of corn, blood or soul crushers. Yeah.

And feet of corn for free question mark. These beasts are occasionally granted to corn's top champions and can also be ridden into the fray by blood letters. They are quadrupedal beasts with broad bodies and the heads of warped bull gods. Their skin is made out of living mess. that is riveted with Corn's run. Saddles are normally cut into the living flesh of these beasts, bounding them to servitude and eternal violence.

Deranging colour from metallic red to an iron black. Horrific red machines that cause irreparable psychological and physical damage in their wake. This is such a reference, much like Ferrari this season. I don't call it. It's a Possible. It's an F1 fan. Yeah. Yeah, yeah.

If you're, you know, yeah. Nobody else cares, though. There's at least three people in the audience that were like, hell yeah. I'm sorry to all three of you. So we also have from that, say, but Corn's prizes. Of course, outside of the general beasts and demons of corn, there are also plenty of rewards that Corn can hand out to as champions that can be received for doing a great job dividend-wise.

They can get a new face of either a blood letter, flesh-hound, juggernaut, or bloodthirster, but they can also get the face of corn, which makes their face a perfect twin of their god's visage, which is a bit weird when you think about it, but we're just not going to think about it too much. The hand of corn turns one of the champion's hands, paws, or tentacles, for those that way inclined, bright red,

and makes them cause more damage when attacking. Poisonous bite is also a fairly common one, along with a gift that is just known as frenzy. One of the weirdest side of things, the champion of corn can also get what's known as crossbreed, which merges them with a fleshhound and makes them a fleshhound hybrid. Oh, don't like that.

Probably best not to dwell on that for too long. Yeah. Jesus. They keep all their champion powers, but now have the power of dog. For example, the champion can have the head and wattle of a fleshhound, a human torso in arms, and then four dog legs growing from his hips. He got that dog in him. He got that dog in him. Look, that's some full metal alchemist shit.

And I'm not going to explain it, but if you've seen it, you get it. you know and mm-mm don't like it but dead seems like a chill guy yeah totally it seems so chill

we also have some magic items so we're going to get into corn magic a bit more because it's a no but maybe as we've talked about before corn has rejected all ordered and trampled forms of magic

such as spells he is a visual god who believes that the casting of the spell is the process of the mind and not the edge of a sword, but he still has some of it in a blunt way. His magic is based on the use of magical demon weapons and magic technology that kills in Corn's name. To get a magical weapon is to get a true blessing, as no weapon smith could have produced the kind of magic embedded nightmare fuel you'd find in a Corn 8 weapon. It also shows an incredible degree of favour on the end of Korn himself. Trusting something with magic is a huge compliment on his part. So don't fuck it up.

When it comes to magic items, a few things are of note. First is the collar of corn, which are worn by fleshhounds and the champions of corn. They're studded bands of iron and brass, and they cannot be removed. It makes them fearless, except for fear of corn himself, and even stronger in a more reckless manner. If the wearer is killed, the collar will dissolve into gooey raw chaos stuff. Ew. What's the problem with that?

What? Yeah, it's fine. Move on. It's cool. I'm not even going to touch it. Shire. My goth girlfriend wears this one, I think. Hell yeah.

Hell yeah. Bloodstones are rocks with deep red veins that are warm to the touch. They're about the size of a clenched fist, and they are only provided to those champions that are favored most of all by call. They can only be used once, and they are used to call upon the aid of Corn's demons. But using it doesn't really guarantee that something is going to happen. Best case scenario, the Bloodstone Summining works, and the demons arrive full of bloodlust and will not vanish until the battle is done.

The worst case scenario is as follows. I haven't read this bit. I deliberately skipped it. Why would you deliberately skip it? I forget which one of us is it on. I think it might be you, Bricky, yeah. All right. The demons do not appear. The bloodstone emits a mighty shriek of unearthly joy and drains the champion of blood.

The stone disappears immediately into the void and the drained shell of the dead champion collapses. Pretty standard stuff. Yeah. Yeah. That's why I skipped it because I felt like it was going to be something awful and it was. So I wanted the surprise. What was the thing? about no treachery, no backstabbing, no scheming,

except there's an item from corn where there's a chance it'll just wipe you out for no reason. Well, that's a neck stab more than a backstab, really. I don't think that counts, but that's just me personally. To finish off, we're going to go through some champions and war bands of corn. So here's some examples. Sapir Red Wolf is a champion clad in crimson armour that travels alone. He hates the idea of a war band, and anyone that goes to him and wishes to join him will bend the knee,

but then immediately be killed by him. He often joins battles randomly without any fanfare and cuts through a Fieldsworth without any care as to who he kills. He also does it all in total silence. What, oh, freaky. What a boss. I wish to serve you. Dead.

Oh, he's coming to join the battle. Maybe they're also dead. Dead. Mm-hmm. The skull rippers are a war band that are led by a man named Karamon. I'm sorry. I'm sorry, Possum. It's not your fault.

But once again, autocorrect has been your enemy because, according to Google Docs, cardamomom. Oh, no. Mmm. Delicious. I love it. It's so close. It's so close. And it's not your fault, possum. I'm sorry. Karaman carries a long blade with a bloodthurster bound inside of it, and he has the face of a blood letter.

They're an old group of misfits, and there's mention of their last member known as Carl the Blunt. He is a troll of some renown and little brain, and he often stands around perplexed. He has difficulty deciding whether he beats enemies to death with the club or burns them alive with his ability to breathe fire. Choices, choices. Either way, we're going to have a lot of fun, right? Yeah. And a bit of a weird one is Grimjack the Hunter. He is a champion that has never taken part in a full-fledged battle.

He is a hunter of blood and stalks his victims in the wild. He lives within the ruins of old destroyed towns that have been long abandoned. Many seek these ruins out to find treasure, and that's when Grimjack strikes. His preferred victims are those who actively seek him out to gain the favor of chaos. He finds those individuals, terrorizes them, and eventually, slowly bleeds them as life. Very clear cut. Yeah. Oh, that's...

Corn, we know what he's about now. we know what's going on it's not at all contradictory and convoluted and confusing you might have been lied to about corn you might have been right all along it seems like no matter what position you take when it comes to all the honor

no honor you know honorable battle versus mass murdering freak show you're pretty much on the money when it comes to corn damn you know I guess at the end of the day

you could just assume that as long as you're killing, things are okay. Pretty much. Glorious combat, glorious death, blood for the blood god, skulls for the skull throne. Just keep killing and you'll be fine. Yeah. It's just that easy.

It's either that or you get cobbed. Cobbbed? Yeah. But how you mean by cod? Oh. corn oh god what

what what stop end it DK that's stupid DK I'm mad at you now yes are we actually ending the episode on that yeah get out of here sick

these kids today with their texting and murder