Afford Anything - How to Build Incredible Habits - with James Clear
Episode Date: October 15, 2018#156: James Clear wanted to start flossing, but he never managed to follow through. Despite his best intentions, his dental floss sat unused in a bathroom drawer. Fortunately, James had learned a thi...ng or two about human behavior and habit formation. As a self-improvement writer, he'd spent hours pouring over scientific data about behavior changes. He decided to apply a few of these concepts to his own quest. First, he placed the floss on the bathroom counter, rather than tucking it inside a drawer. He made the floss visible. Second, he realized he didn't enjoy the tactile sensation of wrapping floss around his fingers, so he replaced it with floss picks. He made the floss more enjoyable. Finally, he decided to floss immediately after brushing his teeth. He used a technique called "habit stacking," in which a new habit is more likely to stick if it's tied, or triggered, by an existing habit like toothbrushing. Thanks to these techniques, James built a flossing habit. He shares these tactics and more in today's podcast episode. James Clear is one of the most well-respected and widely-known thinkers and writers in the world of habit formation and behavior change. His website, jamesclear.com, gets more than one million visitors every month. In this week's episode, we deep-dive into how to create impressive habits and how to break the terrible habits that hold you back If you'd like to start new habits like exercising, saving more, investing, meditating, journaling, practicing yoga or flossing, but despite your best intentions you can't seem to make the habit stick, then this week's podcast episode is for you. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
Transcript
Discussion (0)
Here's the deal.
You can afford anything.
You just can't afford everything.
Every decision that you make is a trade-off against something else.
Saying yes to one thing means that you're saying no to something else,
and that doesn't just apply to your money.
That applies to your time, your focus, your energy, your attention.
It applies to any limited resource that you need to manage.
And this naturally causes two questions to arise.
Number one, what matters most to you?
Not what does society say should matter.
But what are your personal values and your personal priorities?
That's the first question.
The second question is how do you live every day in a way that reflects that?
Because no matter what you want, maybe you're after financial independence or maybe you want to travel the world.
Maybe you want to start a business.
Maybe all of the above.
Maybe you want to put four kids through college or pay off your house.
No matter what it is that you want.
building rock solid habits and and breaking really bad ones.
That is a key way of living up to your best self, of closing that gap between who you are and who you could be.
That gap between what your life is like and what it could be like.
Your habits are the foundation of all of this.
Habits are the foundation of making sure that you are living those priorities.
And that is what this podcast is here to explore.
We're here to explore how you can figure out what matters most and live that.
My name is Paula Pant.
I am the host of the Afford Anything podcast and the founder of Afford Anything.com.
I am thrilled that in today's episode, one of the foremost thinkers about habits and behavior change is joining us, James Clear.
If you haven't heard of him, I recommend that you check him out.
His website, James Clear.com, gets more than a million visitors a month and for very good reason.
he writes compelling, interesting stories about self-improvement that are based in scientific research.
So he draws from the fields of psychology and neuroscience, a lot of disparate fields, to talk about how we can become healthier, happier, more productive, better contributing versions of ourselves.
In today's episode, James and I are going to talk about the specific actionable ways that you can finally break the habits that are holding you back,
and form new habits that will help you become the person that you want to be.
James just published his first book, Atomic Habits,
and he and I first connected about six months ago.
We discovered, actually, that we're from the same hometown.
So I'm very excited to have him on today's show.
Let's see what we can learn.
Here he is, James Clear, on how to create better habits for a better life.
Hey, James.
Hey, thanks so much for having me.
It's good to talk to you again.
It's great to connect with you again.
So let's dive right into all of the information in your book,
because it's action-packed. I want to talk about you create a great framework around how to create
good habits. Make it obvious, make it attractive, make it easy, make it satisfying. Let's walk through
these. First of all, before we get into how to execute these, where did this framework come from?
Yeah. So this book, Atomic Habits, is about how to build good habits and break bad ones. And in order to
do that, I needed to understand how habits work. And if you think about it, a habit is just a behavior that
has been repeated a lot of the time, enough times to become more or less automatic.
And so if you want to understand how habits work, you need to understand from a high level how
human behavior works.
So I break it into these four stages.
And some of these terms may be familiar to readers who have either a psychology background or
have read books like The Power of Habit, but there are some slight changes based on the last
decade of research or so, especially from neuroscientists, that one of the leading theories right now
of how the brain works is called predictive processing.
And so that played a role.
And there's also, interestingly, a great body of research that has been overlooked from, you know, the 1930s, 1940s.
And psychologists were kind of toying with these ideas that I'm about to lay out, but they didn't really understand the inner workings of the mind and like how they actually came to fruition.
So I have the benefit of, you know, an additional 60 years of research or 80 years of research here to look at and think about how this all fits together.
But the basic idea here is that there are four stages that any behavior goes through.
The first stage is what we can call a queue.
And this is like a bit of information or some raw data in your environment, either internal or external, that gets your attention, basically.
It's like the raw input.
So many of the cues that are in our life are visual.
So the one example I give off, and let's see, walk into a kitchen and you see a plate of cookies.
So in that case, it's a visual cue.
This could be any of the senses, but vision is often the way that it manifests itself.
So you see some type of cue.
The second stage is the craving.
And we could describe the craving as sort of your internal interpretation of the cue.
So it's based on your past experiences, so what that cue is meant in the past, and your current state.
And then you kind of make this internal interpretation of what that cue means and what you should do next.
Right.
You gave the example of cigarette smoke.
That interpretation of that cue to one person might mean, I want it, and to another might mean, ew.
Exactly. So Q the craving, and this is the predictive processing part, and what distinguishes my four-stage model from a lot of other models of human behavior, is that this prediction is really a key thing that determines how you respond. As you just said, you can imagine, you know, one person sees a pack of cigarettes on the table, and that means, oh, you know, I have this craving I should smoke. And another person sees a pack of cigarettes and it's like, oh, I don't want to smoke at all gross. So you can just as easily imagine the same person having a different response to the cube based on their current state.
So you walk into the kitchen and you see that.
And if you're hungry, your current state is saying, yeah, you should go ahead and pick
that up.
It'll be tasty.
It'll be sugary.
It'll be good.
But if you just finished eating a huge meal in the other room or you had like, you know,
three cookies after dinner and then you walk into the kitchen and see another plate of cookies
there, well, then you might think, oh, I'm stuffed.
I don't want to eat anything.
So your interpretation can change based on your current state.
It can change based on your beliefs, you know, so you can imagine the same news story runs
on the television and a conservative watches it and a liberal watches it and they come to two
very different conclusions about how they should respond based on how they the filter that they run
that queue through. So you have the cue, then you have the craving and that prediction, you know,
we kind of, a lot of the time we feel like life is reactive, but it's sort of endlessly
predictive. We're endlessly predicting what we're looking at, what we're experiencing the moment
and how we should respond to it. So the craving, the prediction leads to a response, which is the
actual behavior or habit that you perform.
And then that habit or that behavior delivers some kind of result, which we could call
the reward, because if it is rewarding, if it serves you in some way, then two things
happen.
The first is that the reward resolves the craving that you had.
So if you see that cookie and you think this is going to be tasty, I should eat it, then
eating it resolves a little bit of that hunger and satisfies the prediction that you made.
And the second thing is that if an experience is rewarding, then you have a reason to repeat.
it again in the future. So it's followed by sort of this like positive emotional signal that says,
hey, that felt good. You should do this again when circumstances are similar. And so in that way,
the reward sort of closes the feedback loop. And you end up with these four stages of cue, craving
response reward, cue craving response reward. And as you repeat them enough times, your response becomes
more or less automatic. And what we're really describing here is the process of learning, the process
of learning how to respond to different situations, the problems that we face.
If you think about habits in this way, what you realize is that your habits are, in many ways,
your learned solutions to the problems that you face repeatedly throughout life.
So if you, you know, if you come home from work each day and you feel stress and exhausted,
then that's a problem in a sense that you need to resolve.
So maybe the cue is walking in from work and the craving is feeling stressed and anxious.
are tired and you want to change your state, essentially. And so you can imagine a variety of different
habits that could resolve that problem, that could resolve that craving. You could play video games
for an hour and maybe that's away or watch Netflix for an hour. You could smoke a cigarette. You could
meditate for 10 minutes or go for a run. All of these are viable solutions to the same kind of fundamental
problem. And so what you learn is that the habits that you have right now are not necessarily the
optimal habits. Your original habit is not the optimal habit.
not necessarily the optimal habit for solving that problem. So once you realize that, you start to wonder,
well, how can I change my habits? Can I, you know, design this process rather than being the victim of it?
And that's kind of where the four laws come into play. And they give us sort of a set of behavioral guides for
adjusting our habits and building better ones. And that was one of the many insightful things that you said in
your book is that oftentimes when we perform a habit, it's not the habit itself that we want. It's the
feeling we derive from that habit. So we don't want to journal.
we want to think more clearly.
Yeah, I think that's right.
So the way to consider this
if you're breaking into the stages,
what we want is to resolve the craving,
to resolve the prediction
or the desire that you have before the habit.
You know, like you don't want,
you don't really want to smoke a cigarette.
What you want is to not feel stressed
or to reduce anxiety.
You don't really want to go to the gym.
What you want is not the workout,
but the result that the workout delivers.
In this way, habits are often driven
not by the behavior themselves,
but by our prediction.
of what that behavior will give us.
And so if you can either learn to change the prediction
or if you can figure out how to deliver a more immediate reward,
then you have a reason to repeat the habit in the future.
And that's what you mean by predictive processing.
Right.
So those four stages are how a habit works.
And from those four stages, we can come up with four laws of behavior change for each stage.
So for Q, you want to make it obvious for the craving.
You want to make it attractive for the response.
You want to make it easy.
and for the reward, you want to make it satisfying.
And if you would like to break a bad habit, instead of foster or build a good habit,
you simply invert each of those laws.
So the inversion of the first law is to make it invisible instead of make it obvious.
The inversion of the second law is to make it unattractive, make it difficult, and then make it unsatisfying.
And you can sort of think of those four laws, kind of like levers or tools in a toolbox,
that you can pull out based on the current situation or circumstance that you face.
which levers to pull depend on what the bottleneck is for that particular habit or situation.
So let's walk through how to do that. And let's start with that first law in terms of how to deal with cues.
Make it obvious if you want to create a good habit, make it invisible to break a bad habit.
Sure. So let me give you an example of each. So for a long time, I would brush my teeth twice a day, but I wouldn't floss consistently.
And so in this case, I'm looking to build a good habit. And I basically did two things.
the first was to kind of map out the chain of behaviors that I needed to perform for that habit.
And so you can do this for any habit.
You know, at first I realized, okay, I need to take the floss out of the drawer.
And then I need to wrap around my fingers and then floss my teeth and then throw it out.
And so if you'd kind of break it down to that granular level, I realized, well, one problem is the floss is inside the drawer in the bathroom.
Sometimes I just don't see it.
It's not obvious.
And so I bought a little bowl.
And then the second thing that I realized was that it sounds silly, but I didn't like the feeling.
of wrapping the flosser on my fingers. It was just kind of like uncomfortable. So I bought some of
the pre-made flossers and I put it in a bowl and put the bowl right next to my toothbrush. So
finish brushing my teeth, put the toothbrush down, pick a fluster up, floss my teeth, and then you're
done. Essentially, I was just making that habit more obvious and then also employing the third law,
make it easy so that I could build that habit. And that was pretty much all that I had to do
to create that. So in many cases, make it obvious is an environment design change. And you can apply
the same thing for breaking a bad habit, but then, of course, just invert it. So take a bad habit like,
I don't know, watching too much TV or playing too many video games or just too much screen time.
If you walk into pretty much any living room, where do all the couches and chairs face? They all face the
television. So it's like, what is that room designed to get you to do? So you can take a variety of steps here.
You could make television watching less obvious by taking the remote and putting it inside a drawer
in the coffee table or something like that.
You could take the television and put it behind a set of cabinet doors or inside a wall unit,
so you're less likely to see it.
Take the video game controllers and move them from the middle of the floor and put those in a drawer.
You could also increase the friction associated with the task.
So, you know, if you wanted, you could unplug the TV after each use and then only plug it back in
if you can say the name of the show that you want to watch.
So like, no mindlessly just pulling up Netflix and like finding something.
Similarly, you could take the batteries out of the remote control.
That maybe adds like an extra of five.
or 10 seconds to the process of powering the TV on.
And maybe that's enough time for you to realize, I don't really want to watch something
right now.
I'm just doing this out of habit.
And then, you know, if you really wanted to be extreme, you could take the television
off the wall, put it in the closet, and only take it out if you really wanted to watch
something.
But the general point here for make it obvious is that you want to reduce the steps between
you and the good habits and increase the steps between you and your bad habits.
You're essentially looking to make your good habits as obvious as possible.
You know, if you want to practice violin,
Put the violin right in the middle of the living room so you seat all the time and not tucked away in the corner or something like that.
And if you want to break a bad habit, then you want to make it invisible.
You want to remove it from your environment and reduce your exposure to that cue.
Absolutely.
Another thing you could do is rearrange your living room furniture such that two couches face each other so that looking at a television is physically less comfortable than looking at the companions who are in your living room with you.
Right.
Foster those social relationships.
And there are a bunch of ways to apply this to purchasing and budgeting and money.
You know, I mean, you could imagine like, if you find that you're spending too much money on technology or whatever the latest electronics gadget is, well, then don't follow like all the latest tech review blogs.
Or if you want to reduce the amount of money that you're spending eating out, like don't follow your favorite restaurants on Instagram or your favorite food blogs if you're spending too much money on desserts or things like that.
You know, if you're constantly being exposed to those triggers to those cues, then you have to resist and overcome that all the time.
And you might be able to do it for a week, but to do it month after month is very hard.
So in many cases, the most effective way to remove a bad habit is just to reduce exposure to the source and then sort of, you know, effectively those four stages never get rolling in the first place.
One of the things, jumping back to your flossing example, one of the things that I hear within that example is that you also used habit stacking in order to form the flossing example since you tied it to when you brush your teeth.
Yeah, good job picking up on that.
Oh, of course. Thank you.
So habit stacking is this idea that you can make a habit more obvious by tying it to a behavior that you already perform.
So as you very rightly noted, I said, okay, after I brush my teeth, then I will floss my teeth.
Or you could say, you know, in the morning, after I make my cup of coffee, I will meditate for 60 seconds.
Or you can also use this to like insert a new routine into your behavior.
So, you know, say, you want to read more books.
You could say, all right, in the morning, my typical routine is I wake up, I make my bed,
and take a shower. But you could sort of insert that new behavior into that stack of habits by
saying, I wake up, I make my bed, I place a book on my pillow, then I take a shower. Then when you
get in bed at night, there's kind of a book waiting there for you to read. And the idea here is that
it's easier to remember when to do a habit. It's more obvious to you when to act if you have a very
clear place to tie it to in your daily life. And in many cases, that is a very helpful way to do it,
by linking your new habit to an old one.
James, you've traveled a lot.
How do you modify habit stacking to a lifestyle that involves a lot of frequent travel
in which your morning routine might be, I wake up, I grab my passport, I catch a flight,
but then the next four days I'm here, and then all of a sudden I'm in Istanbul.
Right.
In many cases, habits, what they thrive on is stability and context.
And so people often find it hard to build habits when they're on the road or when they're traveling
because, as you just mentioned, the context is always changing.
And you actually see this in a lot of ways with habits that people build naturally without
thinking about it.
You sort of, rather than thinking about your environment as filled with things, you can think
of it as being filled with relationships.
And you gradually, you kind of develop this relationship with the overall context
of the environment.
So for one person, you know, the couch in their living room might be where they read every
night.
And for another person, it might be where they eat a bowl of ice cream and watch television.
and it's more about the relationship you have with that context than with the particular item itself.
Well, you can do something kind of similar when you're traveling a lot or when you're always changing context.
But the key is to tie the habit or to create the habit stack such that it's linked to a particular part of the experience that you repeat.
Because the experience might be repeated, but the context will be different.
So, for example, maybe you'd say something like, well, I'm traveling a lot, so it means I'm checking into a lot of hotels.
So the habit stack might be after I walk into the hotel room, I will put my luggage on the bed or on the luggage rack.
After I put my luggage on the luggage rack, I will do 10 pushups.
Or after I check into the hotel, I will go to the bathroom.
After I go to the bathroom, I will look up the location of the local grocery store so that I know where to go to buy healthier food rather than just eating out or something like that.
And so you essentially look for a part of the experience that you repeat, even if the context changes.
And then you try to link the habit to that.
That makes a lot of sense.
I mean, no matter where you are, you're always going to be going to the bathroom multiple
times a day.
Why not tie some good habit to that?
Right.
You're essentially just looking for what is the stable part of the process?
What is the thing that you can actually rely on being repeated again and again?
And if you can do that, and if you make the habit small enough, you know, that's another
key here.
I talk about in the book, this idea of the two-minute rule where you take whatever habit
you're trying to build and you scale it down to just two minutes.
The idea there is you want it to be two minutes or less.
that it's something you can actually insert, and that's particularly useful if the context
is changing, because you can't always predict what kind of circumstances you're going to come
across or how much time or resources you'll have available. But if the behavior is small enough
that you can do it 98% of the time without fail, then it's much more likely you'll be able
to make it stick. Moving to the second law, can you talk about temptation bundling?
Sure. So the second law of behavior change is to make it attractive. There are a variety of
ways to do this. The idea here, and remember, we've already talked a little bit about this
prediction that precedes every response or every behavior. And so this craving that you feel
to either take an action or to not take an action to stay in your current state or to change
your state. Temptation bundling is a way of making a habit that is not really that
attractive, a little more attractive, or giving you an additional incentive to perform the
behavior. So most recently, this has come out of research from Katie Milkman at the
work and school, University of Pennsylvania. But it's also sort of an application of a psychology
theory known as premax principle. The basic idea is you take something that you need to do,
the habit that you need to build. So like exercising or meditating or budgeting or whatever it is,
the thing that you kind of struggle to stick with. And then you pair it with something that you
want to do. Let's say like going to your favorite restaurant and you say, all right, I will only
go to my favorite restaurant if I map out my monthly budget while I'm there. And so you effectively
increase the desire or the attractiveness of the habit of budgeting because it means that you get
to eat your favorite meal as well. The same idea can be applied, you know, with many different
contexts. Milkman, the researcher that I mentioned who kind of coined this term, she really liked
the series of the Hunger Games books, but she realized that she needed to work out more. And so
she set this rule for herself where she was only allowed to read the Hunger Games if she was at
the gym and like running on the treadmill or whatever. And so the idea there, of course, is just
to increase the attractiveness of the behavior by layering something you want to do with something
you need to do.
Are you familiar with the slightly opposing body of research that states that if you tie an
unrelated external reward to something, such as if I go running, I can eat this cupcake, that
takes away from your motivation to actually go on the run?
This is something that I've heard from Gretchen Rubin, that enjoying the intrinsic act of running
is more effective than tying the run to the cupcake?
So I think the issue here is looking at a particular time scale.
In the long run, that is true.
So I talk about this in chapter two of the book, this idea that I call identity-based habits,
that you're essentially looking to foster this feeling that I am a certain type of person.
And then your habit becomes the way that you embody that identity.
So the goal is not to run a marathon.
It's to become a runner.
Or the goal is not to write a book.
It's to become a writer.
And once you adopt that particular identity,
well then each time you do that action, you're reinforcing that. You have a reason to repeat it in the moment because that's just the type of person that you are. And I think that's ultimately what Gretchen is referencing there. But the challenge is early on, there's sort of this valley of death that people often experience in the beginning because you can sort of think about your habits as it's kind of like every action you take is a vote for the type of person that you believe that you are. And so when you cast these votes, you're building up evidence of being a particular type of person. And so, when you cast these votes, you're building up evidence of being a particular type of person. And so,
person. But early on, you know, let's say like the first time that you sit down to write a sentence,
you might not think of yourself as an author. But if you sit down every day and write a little bit,
then at some point you cross this imaginary threshold, maybe it's six months in or a year in or
whenever, where you're like, yeah, I'm the type of person who writes every day. That's part of my
identity. But it takes a little while for those rewards to come through. And this is additionally
difficult because for many habits, it's sort of this in the book I refer to as the plateau of latent
potential. But it's like we think that we should put in a little bit of effort and get a little bit
of result, that there should be like this linear relationship with effort and results. But your
habits don't really add up like that. They kind of compound more. And the hallmark of any
compounding process, as anybody interested in finance can tell you, is that the most powerful
outcomes are delayed. And so there's sort of this period in the beginning where you're putting in
this effort, but you're not really seeing much results for it.
Well, I mean, what is the reward for going to the gym for a week or even a month?
You know, in many cases, the scale hasn't really changed.
Your body doesn't really look that much different in the mirror.
It's not until you make these small choices, these 1% improvements or 1% declines and let them compound over 2 or 5 or 10 years that you really start to see the full effects of your habits become apparent.
And so you need a reason to repeat that in the moment.
Now, coming back to your example of, oh, I work out, but then I reward myself with a pint of ice cream or a brown.
or something like that. I think the key is external reinforcers can be very effective. And this
shown in a variety of research is a book called The Power of Reinforcement. It's written by a professor,
I think, at Sunny College in New York. Anyway, he gives tons of examples. I mean, we're,
we actually use so many reinforcements that were blind to them on many given days. Like,
your paycheck is a reinforcement that gets you to show up at your job. There are many examples of
reinforcements being effective. But I think the key is that you want the external
reinforcer to align with the internal identity that you're trying to build.
So if you're going to the gym and then you eat a pint of ice cream, well, it's kind of like
the two votes wash each other out.
You know, like, are you a healthy person or not?
And so if you can find other ways to reinforce that identity, and this is, I think,
important with finance as well, you know, in many cases, people will say, well, the reward for
me saving or something like that is buying a leather jacket.
Well, that doesn't really make sense, right?
Like in one case, you're conflicting.
So maybe the reward should be having an hour to.
spend however you want it. And so now you're reinforcing this idea of freedom and control over your
time, which is probably what you're saving for as well. And so you want to have the external
reinforcement match the desired identity. That makes a lot of sense. The reward for running then
would be getting a nicer pair of running shoes. Sure. Well, or it could be something like that,
could be getting like a massage, which would be casting a vote for taking care of your body. So it's the same thing
is, you know, like going in exercising or eating healthy or whatever. It depends on the different
goals that you have, but there are often ways to find those two that support each other.
Now, how does temptation bundling tie in with creating a motivation ritual? So a motivation ritual
is the phrase that I use for some small action that you repeat in the same way each time that
sort of gets you moving in the right direction. So it's like, you can think of it a little bit like
an on-ramp to a highway. So I played baseball for a long time all the way through college. And
one of the things about baseball is that you have a ton of games. There's so many games,
especially compared to other sports. And so coaches are always saying something like,
all right, you got to find a way to be motivated day. Got to find a way to be, you know, inspired to play.
And there's going to be just naturally days where you feel off. And so you have to figure out
some way to get into game mode. And so what I did was I had this same ritual that I would do every time.
Same type of stretches, same sequence. I'd run across the field at the same point and then stretch
over there and then run back and do the same number of throws and all that type of stuff.
And the whole thing took about 10 minutes.
By the time I finished it, it was kind of like I was flipped a switch in my mind where it was
like, oh, hey, remember this?
Like it's time to be in game mode.
It's time to play.
You can do the same thing for pretty much any process.
And if you get really good at it, you can actually scale the ritual down and maintain
its potency, maintain that kind of light switch type of feeling that gets you in the
mode right away.
So one example, there's this writer, his name's Ed Lack.
Adamor, and he would put his headphones on and listen to music without words, classical or jazz or
something like that, and then write.
And he did this for a few months.
And then he realized one day that he put his headphones on, but he forgot to turn the music on.
He just like immediately went into writing.
And he was like, whoa, my brain is like getting into writing mode.
I don't even need the music anymore.
But what happened was he essentially associated that motivation ritual of put your headphones
on and play music with writing.
And he was able to get into the zone just by putting his headphones on.
And so by building a small motivation ritual like that, you can make it easier to initiate a habit and then, of course, make it easier to follow through each day.
We'll come back to this episode after this word from our sponsors.
Are you interested in a bank that's not going to nickel and dime you with fees and that gives you a high interest rate?
Check out Radius Bank.
They have a product called Radius Hybrid Checking.
It's a hybrid between the type of interest that you would make on a savings account with the flexibility of a checking account.
In radius hybrid checking, you can make 0.85% APY on the balance inside of your checking account.
To put that in perspective, that is 17 times greater than the national average.
According to the FDIC as a February 7th, 2018, the national average was 0.04% APY.
So you can make 17 times greater than that.
Now, that applies to balances above $2,500.
But there's no cap on the balance that can earn it.
In fact, it only goes up from there because if your balance is greater than 100,000, you can make 1.2% APY.
So there's no cap and there's no expiration date.
This is not some flashy introductory rate that's going to expire after 6 to 12 months.
There are also no monthly maintenance fees.
You get access to free ATMs worldwide and your first order of checks is free.
So if you're looking for that combo of freedom from fees plus high interest, go to radiusbank.com slash.
That's R-A-D-I-U-S-Bank.com slash Paula.
You know, the world just wasn't built for the self-employed.
Lots of services, like banking, retirement planning, and accounting services, aren't built for people who are freelancers or who are self-employed.
But fortunately, FreshBooks is.
FreshBooks is cloud-based, simple, easy-to-use accounting and invoicing software that is designed for the Solopreneur.
When you log in, it answers the one burning question that you really want to know, which is, how's business?
The notification center is like your personal assistant.
It tells you what's changed since you last logged in, and it tells you what you need to deal with, like overdue invoices.
And speaking of overdue invoices, if you have a client that's late on making a payment,
FreshBooks will automatically send them a late payment reminder so that you don't have to have an awkward conversation.
If you want to give them a try, FreshBooks is offering an unrestricted 30-day free trial, and there's no credit card required.
So just give them a try.
To claim it, go to FreshBooks.com slash Paula.
And when they ask, how did you hear about us?
Type in Afford Anything.
Again, for a 30-day free trial, go to FreshBooks.com slash Paula, P-A-U-L-A.
And when they ask, how did you hear about us?
Type in, afford anything.
How could a person apply this? Let's say that there's a habit. So something like writing is something that you do at a specific time for a specific duration. What if there's a habit that you're trying to form that is low intensity but long duration? So for example, spending less money, which is something that you don't do it at any one particular time X. It's something that you do throughout the day in small doses when you don't buy that shirt online. You don't buy that.
coffee at Starbucks. Habits like this, don't spend money, don't drink alcohol are what I would
call habits of avoidance. And they're inherently hard to build because, so we talked about those
four stages, the first three stages, the cue, the craving and the response, make it obvious,
make it attractive, make it easy, are about getting you to perform a habit the first time, right?
So they're everything that precedes the habit and then the action itself. But make it satisfying,
the reward, that fourth stage, is about getting you to repeat it again the next time.
And so for habits like the ones that you just described, well, you inherently need to repeat
that again and again throughout the day whenever you're facing a purchase decision or whatever.
And so the key to getting that to stick is to having some kind of little, it doesn't have to be huge,
but some type of immediate satisfaction that is associated with the behavior.
Because if you have that, then you have two things.
One, you have this expectation that gets reinforced because if the behavior, you have the behavior,
is satisfying each time. Well, then it starts to impact the craving that you have before the action. You start to, oh, I expect this to be enjoyable. And then the second thing is that you have this kind of positive signal, this positive emotional signal in the brain that tightens the feedback loop for next time. Positive emotions cultivate habits and negative emotions destroy them. And it's really, the key here is not necessarily the size of the satisfaction or the reinforcement or the reward, but the speed of it.
So in the book, I refer to this as the cardinal rule of behavior change, which is that behaviors that are immediately rewarded, get repeated, behaviors that are immediately punished, get avoided.
The key challenge here when dealing with these habits of avoidance, like not spending money, is that behaviors like that are inherently unsatisfying.
They're inherently not rewarding because it's like, well, all I'm doing is just resisting, you know, like I'm just not going to Starbucks or I'm just not eating out for dinner.
And so you need to kind of flip this on its head and find a way to be satisfied in the moment.
So I had one reader, he and his wife wanted to eat less meals out and cook more for themselves,
both to save money and to just be healthier in general.
This is one of those habits of avoidance.
We're just trying to not eat out.
So what they did was they created a savings account and they labeled it trip to Europe.
And then each time that they skipped going out to eat, they would move $50 over to the account.
And then at the end of the year, they were able to put the money toward the trip.
And the nice thing about that is it kind of gives you an immediate way to feel satisfied.
It's like, okay, well, we don't get the satisfaction of going out to eat the meal, but we do get to see the savings account increase right away.
And so there's a little signal there that says, yeah, this was worth it.
Now, if you have a smaller behavior, like you're just trying to resist purchases all day long, then perhaps that isn't possible.
You know, like eventually you're just moving all this money over and maybe you don't have enough to save or something like that.
So there are other ways that you can do this.
Again, we come back to the ultimate form of immediate satisfaction is a reinforcement of your desired identity.
So if you adopt that mindset of I'm the type of person who doesn't spend on frivolous purchases or I'm the type of person who takes the actions that are needed to retire early or something like that, then you can reinforce that identity each time you resist the change.
But you also could use a method called habit tracking, which essentially is like putting an X on the calendar.
each day that you do a habit, or in this case, perhaps you keep like a number of tally marks.
So it's like, oh, I have avoided purchases five times today or something like that.
Putting down each tally mark is kind of like a small but immediate bit of reinforcement.
It's like visual proof of being the type of person that you want to be.
And so having some small way to feel satisfied in the moment is a key to getting behaviors like that to stick in the long run.
I suppose something as simple as sending out a tweet saying,
attempted to buy X didn't do it, could reinforce that, as well as help you foster that community
in which that behavior is normalized, which is another thing that you talk about.
Oh, yeah. So social reinforcement is huge there. That's a really good example, Paula, actually,
because not only does it reaffirm that you're that type of person, but then eventually you get
like the respect and approval of this group that you're attracting, who's also into that.
Society leans heavily on us all. You know, like there are all sorts of habits that we perform
just because society expects it of us or the tribes that we are a part of expected of us.
You know, you can take broad things.
Like if you go into an elevator, you turn around to face the front.
Or if you have a job interview, you wear a dress or a suit and tie or something nice.
There's no reason that has to be that way.
You know, you could face the back of the elevator.
You could wear a bathing suit to a job interview.
But we don't do it because it violates the shared expectations of the group.
And many of our habits are like this.
You hear this very commonly with financial habits.
You know, people will be like, well, I really want to save more, but all my friends are going out to eat.
And I feel like I'll be left out of the friend group if I don't go out to happy hour with them.
And so what you need is to join a group where the desired behavior is the normal behavior.
Because if your habits go against the grain of the social group, it's very hard to stick with them.
Habits that go against the social norms of your tribe are unattractive.
Habits that go with the social norms of your tribe are very attractive.
And the key here, the caveat is you need a sense of belonging.
The thing that makes you want to go with the tribe is that you belong there.
If you don't, you feel like you'll lose your friends.
And it's often much more effective to have a new tribe to go to than to try to just
branch out and do it on your own.
That requires a lot of courage and bravery.
And it also requires you to be lonely.
And if we have to choose between having the habits we want to have and being alone or
having the wrong habits and being with the group, we often would rather be wrong with the crowd
than right by ourselves. And so it really helps if you have a new tribe to join or a new group to
hang out with, other people who believe in the same type of behavior you're looking to build,
so that can be socially reinforced as well as reinforcing your internal desired identity.
Let's talk about the third law. To create a good habit, make it easy, and to break a bad habit
and make it more difficult. Sure. So this is largely about the amount of friction that is a
associated with the task. So you can think about it. It's sort of like if you had a garden hose that
was bent and you wanted to get more water through the hose, you have two options. I mean, one,
you could just crank up the valve and force more water through, in which case you're effectively
like overpowering the challenges that you're facing. And the other option is just to, you know,
unwind the hose and remove the bend and let water flow through naturally. And both of those are
ways of getting something done, of getting more water through the hose, of getting the habit performed.
but one of them increases tension in your life and requires more effort, and the other relieves
tension. And so when it comes to habits, what you want is to relieve the tension associated with
the task, to remove the friction that's holding you back. So it's more likely that you'll be
able to stick with it over the long run. Fantastic analogy, by the way. It was one of my favorites.
Oh, thank you. It's sort of like, you know, you're looking to remove that friction. And the key here
is that this is something that is a little bit counterintuitive when you talk about the idea, because
we've all heard this idea like, oh, you should start with small steps. But there are two
challenges. The first is it goes against things that we're often told, like you need to have
more willpower or perseverance or to push harder. You need to have grit. And there's nothing
wrong with those qualities. It's just that relying on that exclusively is a bad strategy for
long-term change. You might be able to overpower the challenges in your environment for a day
or a week, but I've never consistently seen someone stick to positive habits in a negative
environment, stick to difficult habits in a high friction environment. One way to do this is to practice
this method that I referred to earlier, which I called the two-minute rule. And I had a reader
who did something similar. So he ended up losing over 100 pounds. And one of the ways that he did it
was that he went to the gym, but he wasn't allowed to stay for longer than five minutes. And it sounds
crazy, but he did this for like six weeks. He would show up at the gym, do like half an exercise,
basically. Five minutes would be up and they walk out of the door and go home. It's the exact opposite
of what people usually do when they're looking to get in shape. You know, they get all motivated
and try some really hard workout and then bust their butt and sweat like crazy and do that for a
couple weeks and then they fade out and then the process repeats itself, you know, three months later or
whatever. But if you think about it, what he was doing was actually makes a lot of sense,
which is that he was mastering the art of showing up. And a habit must be, you know,
established before it can be improved. If you don't master the art of showing up, there's nothing
left to optimize anyway. And so if you can scale the habit down to just the first two minutes
and figure out a way to show up each day, then you have the chance to improve from there.
This is doubly important because there are all these logistical details associated with building
a better habit that most people never think about in the beginning. I mean, we're very
results oriented or outcome oriented. And so we think about things like,
All right, I want to lose 20 pounds or I want to make six figures this year or whatever the outcome is that we're looking to achieve.
But if you think about like, take this reader example of going to the gym, I mean, there are all sorts of details that you need to figure out, okay, you want to go to the gym each day.
Well, what gym is it?
What route will you take to get there?
Are you going to go by yourself?
Are you going to join a friend?
Are you going to go before work or after work?
Do you need to pack gym clothes?
Are you going to go home and change?
Do you need to have a water bottle or is there a water fountain at the gym?
this sounds like silly little stuff, but like if you keep forgetting your water bottle and there's no water found in the gym, that's enough to get people to quit in the beginning.
And so if you're focused just on the first two minutes and not on the outcome, then you can figure all that stuff out.
You'll know that you'll be there each day.
And then you can shift your focus to expanding and improving from there.
So obviously the core idea here is to make it as easy as possible so that you so easy that you could show up 98% of the time.
Then if you do that, you have a lot of choices.
given that it takes time first to establish that habit, it takes both time and frequency, to establish that habit and that it often is more effective for those habits to start small and that there aren't necessarily going to be immediate results. And given that those results are not linear, but rather compounding, I mean, how do you square that with the fact that people are inherently motivated by seeing results and once a month or two months pass by without any visible results?
people can feel discouraged.
Well, so you've just described one of the great challenges of building good habits and
breaking bad ones, which is that behaviors often produce multiple outcomes across time.
So, you know, if you take the habit of eating a donut, the immediate outcome is favorable.
It's sugary.
It's tasty.
You enjoy it.
The ultimate outcome that you gain weight in a couple weeks or a month is unfavorable.
But for good habits, it's often the reverse.
the immediate outcome of going to the gym, for example, is that it takes effort and hard work and
sacrifice. But the ultimate outcome that you're in shape a month from now or a year from now is
favorable. And so a lot of the challenge is figuring out ways, and we've talked a little bit about
those immediate reinforcements and ways to kind of layer some satisfaction onto the behavior.
But a lot of the challenge of building good habits and bringing bad ones is figuring out ways
to pull those long-term consequences of your bad habits into the immediate moment. So you feel
it right then. It's unsatisfying to do it in the moment and pulling the long-term benefits of your
good habits into the immediate moment so that you feel it right then and you have a reason to
continue to repeat it. And I think in the long run, identity and social groups, some of the
tribes that we talked about before, are two of the strongest forms of reinforcing that and getting
a habit to stick. They find there was a really interesting survey done with the YMCA and their chain
of gyms where they found that for the entry survey, the things that got people to sign up and join
in the first place, it was often about the resources, the facilities, the classes they had or the
machines that were available. But when they surveyed people who had been there for a while,
a few months or a couple of years, the thing that got people to stay were the relationships
and the friendships that they had. And I think that that's probably true for habits as well,
that it's often the external reinforcements or the immediate result or the immediate reward
that you layer on top of the habit that gets you to show up in the beginning. But the thing that
gets it to stick is the adoption of a new identity or the adoption or joining of a new tribe
and the social and kind of like internal reinforcement that is associated with that happen in the
long run. What would you say to somebody who lives in a small town or who is unable to find a
geographically close by tribe of people who can reinforce a given behavior? It's a great question.
And thankfully, we live in an era where the internet exists.
So we have a couple options.
You know, previously, before the internet, you were confined to the person that was on your
team or in your violin classes or went to your school and hoped that they would have the,
you know, the same interests as you and wanted to build the same habits as you.
And you were kind of geographically constrained.
Now we have a little bit more option with the digital environment.
So social media in particular is a key one.
If you think about it, the people you follow on social media, it's sort of like you get to create your own little city.
You get to decide who the citizens are and what they're talking about each day and the ideas you get exposed to.
And so you should be really careful about who you follow on those platforms because those are the ideas that you're going to be exposed to again and again.
So if you choose carefully, you can surround yourself with a fair amount of stimuli that maybe nudges you in the right direction.
But the other thing that you can do is living in a small town or living in an area where you're geographically constrained,
you do still have the option of trying to find or create a space where you're not fighting stimuli.
So this is how it often feels if you're not surrounded by people who share your goals.
It's like, well, not only do I have this goal and I have to put in work to achieve it,
but now I'm also trying to like overcome the competing forces, the competing stimuli that I'm feeling from,
the people around me or the folks that I work with or whatever.
In many cases, building a habit in an environment that already has competing stimuli is a very
difficult thing to do.
So we can think about this in a physical sense before we think about it in a social sense.
So if you have your television, your living room, and you're always watching something
each night and you want to build the better habit of reading, well, trying to do it in that
environment is hard because what you're used to in that context is turning on the television
each night. And so you're, if you walk into the living room to read, you're now fighting against
this kind of non-conscious or competing stimuli of using the television. And it's similar in a social
sense that if a certain group of people that you hang around have a typical style of behavior or
set of habits and you try to do something different in that context, you're again competing against
those stimuli. And that can be a challenging thing. So in many cases, both in the sense of the
physical environment and in the social environment, it's easier to build a new habit if you're in a
context where there's no stimuli or relationship with that environment that's already established.
So if you want to build a journaling habit, it might be easier to do that at a coffee shop
that like you've never visited before, but is close to where you work and you just go there each day.
And that becomes the new place where the journaling habit lives rather than trying to do it
in your living room where you're used to watching television all the time.
And the same thing is true for finding a group or a new tribe or a new social group that you're a part of.
So rather than trying to butt heads with the people that you hang out with all the time and force this new habit in,
maybe you carve out an hour for yourself each day where you go to a new place, whether it's a room in your apartment or your house or a new place in town,
that you don't have anything associated with.
And it becomes the hour that you get where you either spend it online with this particular community or for certain habits,
that's the hour that you go to this new gym and you're looking to build new relationships there
and meet people and so on. The last thing I'll say about this by getting social habits to stick is that the
key part is not, well, it's two things. The first is that the desired behavior is the normal behavior
in that group. But the second part is that you have something else that you share in common with those people.
So you have a reason to connect with them already. And then once you belong, once you have that friendship,
now you have a reason to perform the normal behavior.
For example, Steve Cam runs a site called Nerd Fitness.
And Nerd Fitness is about getting in shape,
but it's specifically tailored to people who love superheroes or Star Wars or Legos
or all kinds of other nerdy stuff that people are into.
And so if you go to join that group,
you might feel just out of place as normal when you go to the gym or starting something new.
But if you can bond over like your mutual love of Star Wars,
Then you have a reason to connect with the group to build friendships, and then you can slowly develop all the health-related habits that you were looking to build in the long run.
So it's often better to find kind of those like mutually beneficial backdoors or common interests and then build a friendship over that and let the habit kind of evolve or nudge yourself in that direction naturally.
That makes a lot of sense.
And that's why you see there's a local cat cafe here in Las Vegas where I live that does cat yoga, yoga in the cat room.
Yes, that's a perfect example.
Well, goat yoga is super popular right now, too.
You know, it's like, all right, all these people love these goats on Instagram and whatever,
and then they go there and they also practice yoga and get to hang out with the animals they love too.
We'll come back to this episode in just a minute.
Speaking of forming good habits, do you want to form the habit of working out more,
but it can be difficult.
It can be time-consuming.
Maybe you don't have time to go to the gym.
You don't have the equipment that you need.
Wouldn't it be awesome if there was a streaming service that gave you just instant access to a large variety of workouts
that you could do from the comfort of your living room?
Well, there is, and it's called Beach Body on Demand.
They're the company behind P90X, the 21-day Fix,
a bunch of very famous workout programs.
They have everything ranging from bodybuilding to weightlifting, to cardio, to yoga,
and you can work out on your schedule.
Their workouts are as short as 10 minutes,
and plenty of them don't require any extra equipment.
In fact, my favorite program is called T-25.
I like it for two reasons.
Number one, it doesn't require any extra equipment.
Number two, it's only 25 minutes long.
And both of those really take my excuses away.
Even if I'm traveling, I can still do it because I don't need to be carrying extra equipment with me.
I really want you to try this service because it's convenient and it's easy and it makes it more likely that you're actually going to do the workout.
Right now, my listeners can get a special free trial membership, including their new 14-day results plan,
where you can lose up to 9 pounds in the first two weeks.
when you text Paula to 30-30-30-30.
You will get full access to this entire platform for free.
All the workouts, the nutrition information, the results plan to get you super-fast results, and support.
Totally free.
Again, just text Paula to 30-30-30-30.
That's P-A-U-L-A.
Text Paula to 30-30-30.
Payroll and benefits are hard, especially if you're a small business.
You just don't have time to become an expert in taxes and regulations.
and those things keep changing.
And old school payroll providers aren't built for the way that you work as a small business.
If you're facing that problem, check out Gusto.
Gusto makes payroll benefits in HR really easy for small businesses.
Their modern technology handles that heavy lifting, which makes it easy to get things right.
72% of customers spend less than five minutes to run payroll.
And nine out of 10 users say Gusto is easier to use than other payroll solutions.
In fact, four out of five customers reduce payroll errors after switching to Gusto.
Most small businesses don't have an HR expert, but you don't need to use one if you have Gusto because they've got great software and great service so you can focus on your business, not on payroll and paperwork.
To help support the show, Gusto is offering our listeners an exclusive limited time deal.
Sign up today and you'll get three months free once you run your first payroll.
Just go to gusto.com slash Paula.
That's g-U-S-T-O-com slash Paula.
So let's talk about the fourth law.
So the fourth law is make it satisfying. And as I mentioned earlier, we could summarize this with the cardinal rule of behavior change, which is behaviors that are immediately rewarded, get repeated, and behaviors that are immediately punished get avoided. But it doesn't have to be a punishment or even an external reinforcer per se. You could just find ways to make the habit itself a little more enjoyable in the moment. So businesses are fantastic at doing this. A common example is toothpaste. There's no reason that toothpaste needs to taste minty. It just,
increases the satisfaction and the clean mouth feel of using it. And so you have a reason to
repeat it and brush your teeth again more in the future. It doesn't actually increase the effectiveness
of the paste itself. Chewing gum was a similar story. For many years, chewing gum had been around,
but it was chewy, but not really tasty. It was kind of like this bland resin. And then Riggly came
into the field in the late 1800s, and they came out with juicy fruit and spearmint and doublement.
And for the first time, gums had these flavors. And so now you chew gum and
it's like, oh, this is tasty.
I have an immediate bit of satisfaction associated with it.
That's when chewing gum really took off as this worldwide habit.
An interesting new example, or recent example, car manufacturers have now started, so
BMW did this a few years ago, and Ford has done it recently as well.
And they've come up with ways of adding, like, an engine roar or growl to the process of
stepping on the accelerator.
So BMW will actually pump it through the stereo speakers so that when you press on the gas,
you get this louder growl.
Ford has come up with this method where you essentially like the engine sound is muffled,
so it's a quiet drive most of the time.
But if you really step on the gas, it opens up this valve and kind of lets the engine sound into the car.
But that's simply a method of making it more satisfying in the moment to press on the gas and drive the car.
So there are a variety of ways that businesses try to do things like that to increase the positive emotional signal associated with doing the habit.
And again, the immediate that is, the more.
likely you are to repeat the behavior in the future. Right. That was the famous example with
Fabriz from Charles Duhigg's book, where artificially adding an assent to Fabriz,
even though it wasn't necessary, created a positive emotional signal that reinforced the behavior
of spraying it. Right. The cleaning solution was the same the whole time, but just cleaning the
house wasn't enough to get people to build the habit out of it. It wasn't until they added the scent
that it was a satisfying experience and they had a reason to repeat it. So how can you invert that to make
something that you find satisfying, like eating candy. How can you invert that to make it unsatisfying?
Yeah, that's a good question. So there are a bunch of people trying to wrestle with this problem.
So the Pavlock, Mish Sati put this out, is kind of like this little wrist band that you wear.
And if you do something you don't want to do, like if you visit Facebook or whatever, it can be linked to your actions online and it'll like zap you or shock you.
So there's this immediate little bit of pain associated with the habit. So there have been like some solutions like that that,
people have come up with. But I think that probably the more widely applicable usage is, again,
it comes back to some social norms. So accountability partners are a common one with this.
If you want to go for a run each morning and you wake up and you realize, oh, I'm in my warm bed and
it's cold outside. I don't really want to get up at 6 a.m. and go for this run now.
There isn't a whole lot of pain associated with that. It's more just about the pleasure of being there.
But if you had made an agreement with a friend early on yesterday or earlier in the week and said, hey, I'm going to meet you at the park at 6 a.m.
Well, now suddenly there's an immediate punishment associated with that.
You're a bad friend.
You leave them stranded at the park at 6 in the morning.
And so accountability partners can be very useful in that sense because they increase the pain associated with the task.
You can also utilize what in the book I cover and call a commitment device.
Commitment devices are sort of like one-time actions that make.
either the desired behavior easier or the undesired behavior more challenging.
So one of the stories that I gave in the book is about Victor Hugo, who is the famous author.
And he had signed this book contract to write the hunchback of Notre Dame.
And he signed the deal, which probably resonates with writers everywhere.
And they just didn't do anything for like a year.
He hosted parties and went traveling and went out to eat and just generally procrastinated.
And eventually his publisher got upset with him.
was like, listen, we have an ultimatum now.
Like, it has to be done in six months or we're canceling the book.
And so he brought his assistant in, and they packed up all his clothes and put him in a chest and then locked his clothes away.
And the only thing he was left with was this large, like, shawl or robe.
And so he basically didn't have any clothes that were fit for entertaining guests or traveling or going out on the town.
And so he kind of put himself on house arrest and effectively forced his hand.
And it ended up working.
He wrote all through the fall and winter.
And then actually ended up finishing the book about two weeks early.
But if you use commitment devices like that, you make the behavior that you're more likely to fall into, procrastination or something like that, less appealing.
You make it more unsatisfying.
You can imagine doing this with a bunch of technology solutions now.
There are companies like Stick.
I think it's STI-C-K-K, I think there's two Ks, where B-Minder is another one.
And these services, these companies allow you to place a bet and effectively just put that money like in a whole.
And if you don't follow through, then the money will get donated to a charity that you hate or you'll lose the money or something like that.
Those services are like a commitment device that makes it unsatisfying to follow through.
I will say, though, that in general for breaking a bad habit, I think it's more effective to intervene at the first stage, make it obvious or in this case make it invisible.
Or at the third stage, make it difficult because you're trying to prevent the behavior before it occurs.
if you wait until the fourth stage, you've already performed the bad habit.
So it may help you to be less likely to fall into the next time if you have a negative consequence associated with it.
But it doesn't actually prevent you from doing it this time because by the time you get to the fourth stage, the behavior is already done.
So generally speaking, I think the first and the third stages are the best place to focus on eliminating a bad habit.
In the example that you gave about commitment devices with Victor Hugo and how he essentially, as you said, put himself on house arrest so that he could write the book.
book, does the motivation for that have to come from inside of you? I'm thinking about the application
of parents who would ground their kids to say, you know, you're not going out, you have to study.
It would on the outside be the same thing as what Victor Hugo experienced. He can't throw parties,
so he had to write. So does that internal motivation, is that what makes the difference?
Yeah. So if you think about the stages that we talked about, that there needs to be some kind of
prediction or we could call that motivation or craving or desire in that second stage that
precedes the behavior.
If you're the teenage student that is grounded or whatever prevented from going out, the
parent has effectively increased the action or the friction and the difficulty associated
with going out with your friends or not doing what you're supposed to do.
And so it's impossible for you to do that behavior.
But it doesn't necessarily make the action of studying or doing your homework or whatever it is.
more attractive. So we're kind of talking about like two separate behaviors. The one is preventing
the bad habit of going out with your friends from the parent's eyes. And the other is instilling the good
habit of studying. So you really need to kind of pull on both levers there. So you, yeah, it's fine.
Like grounding them might make the bad habit less effective, but you also need a method for making
it obvious and attractive and easy and satisfying to fall into the habit of study. And so in a case like,
again, the Victor Hugo example, how does the thing that you know that you need to do, whether that be
writing or exercising or X? How can you make that more attractive if you find a lot of internal
resistance to it? So sometimes it can be more attractive just in comparison to the other behavior.
So for example, phones are a good one here that I've felt and experienced a lot myself.
We're all hooked to our phones so much. I think the average adult checks their phone number 150.
50 times a day now and it goes up every year.
We all just get more and more tied to them.
But I've done a couple things that have been interesting little experiments.
So the first one was, and I still do this now, whenever possible, I leave my phone in another
room until lunch each day.
So I sort of get like this block of time for, you know, three or four hours in the
morning where it's not there.
It's just a few rooms away and up the stairs and, you know, out of my office.
But it's interesting that I never go up to get it.
It's like I, if it was on me, I would pull it out and check it, you know, a couple of
times every few minutes or whatever. But when it's just a little bit more friction associated
with task, I don't actually want to do it. And so many of the choices that we make are like that,
where we just choose the most convenient or the most frictionless behavior in the moment.
And so sometimes if you just increase the friction of the bad habit enough, the good one
will kind of win out a little bit because it's like, well, I really did want to write that article
or to work on this project that I say is important to me. It just wasn't quite as convenient as the
thing that was taking up my time and attention in its place. So sometimes it's just a comparison thing.
And by shifting the scales a little bit, you can kind of slide more toward the good habit.
The other thing that you can do is you can increase the attractiveness and the satisfaction
associated with the behavior. So, you know, we talked about temptation bundling and social
norms. Those are two really effective ways to increase the attractiveness of a habit. We talked about
reinforcements and habit tracking. Those are really effective ways to increase the satisfaction,
the immediate satisfaction of a habit. The other.
thing that you can consider is timing. Many habits are attractive at a particular time of day,
but not at another time. And this makes sense, you know, like if you're trying to build the habit of
meditating and it's early in the morning and you have a couple kids running around getting dressed
before school, like it's just not an attractive thing to do right then. The house is crazy. You've got
all kinds of other stuff to focus on. But if you ask yourself to do it at a different time,
like maybe at, I don't know, 9 p.m., everybody's asleep and it's just you. Well, maybe that's
an easier time of day to build that habit.
And so one thing you can do is sort of map out what are the different times throughout
the day.
You could just, if you do this, sometimes you only have to do it for maybe like a week and you
just block out every day by hour.
So eight to nine, nine to ten, ten to eleven, so on.
And then just keep like a little journal for a week of what your energy is like during
that particular hour.
So you're effectively coming up with this energy journal.
And then once you have that data after doing it for a week, you can look at the
habits that you want to build and like kind of review what your week looks like and where is my
energy appropriate or what time of day tends to be more reliable for building that habit.
So when it comes to writing, I noticed that for a while I tried to write in the afternoon,
but that was a really bad time for me.
My energy was sagging a little bit and I usually get my best writing done earlier in the morning
or later at night.
So now I just, I don't think about that much.
I schedule interviews for the afternoon.
I do email in the afternoon, and I focus on writing either first thing in the morning or later in the evening.
That's more about matching up the habit with the right time and energy for that behavior than necessarily making the behavior itself more attractive, but the end result is the same.
James, one of the other concepts that you discuss in your book is in terms of layers of behavior change.
You talk about outcomes, processes, and identity.
We've touched a bit on identity, but can you articulate the difference between all of these and why that framework matters?
Sure. So the key here, and the way I refer to it in the book is the difference between like identity-based habits and outcome-based habits. And we we live in a very outcome-oriented society. I mean, this is part of it's just the result of how society is designed. I mean, you know, the news and social media are very results focused or outcome-focused programs or services. You're never going to see a story that is a news story that's like, man eats chicken and salad for lunch today. Like it's not going to be a story until six months later when it's like, man,
loses 100 pounds. And I think the consequence of that is that we, because we are inundated with
results and never see the process behind things, we tend to overvalue results. The natural mode
is for many people to build what I would call an outcome-based habit. So you think about the outcome
you want, you know, I want to save X amount of dollars or I want to lose 20 pounds or whatever it is.
And then you come up with a set of habits or a system or a process for achieving that. So it would be
like outcomes are the outer layer of the onion and then the habits are the next layer in.
But then I think there's a deeper layer of behavior change, which I'll call your identity.
And these are kind of the beliefs or the sense of self-image that you have about yourself.
That's sort of the inner layer of behavior change.
And most people start with the outcome, build the habits, and then let the identity kind of
follow naturally.
Instead, it's often more productive to focus on the opposite.
It's not that any of those three levels are better or worse or not useful, but it's just the
direction of change.
it's often more useful to ask yourself, who is the type of person that I want to become? What is the type of identity I want to build? What habits can lead me to that identity? And then let the outcomes and results come naturally. Most people would say something like, all right, I want to lose 20 pounds. So that's the outcome. If I follow this diet, then I'll be skinny and lose 20 pounds. And then whatever identity comes is just the one that comes. They don't really think about it. But instead, you could say, well, who is the type of person that could lose 20 pounds? Well, maybe it's the type of person who doesn't miss workouts. And so that's the idea.
identity. You start there. And then you say, well, how do I become the type of person who doesn't
miss workouts? Well, maybe then I focus on the habit of showing up at the gym and, you know,
doing something, even like that example I gave earlier of, you know, just go to the gym for five minutes
each day. And then once you've built the habits and foster that identity, once you become that
type of person, you can sort of let the outcomes come naturally. The power of this approach is that in many
ways, true behavior change is really identity change. It's like, it's one thing to say, I'm the type of person
who wants this. It's something very different to say, I'm the type of person who is this. And once you
have adopted a particular identity, you're not really even pursuing behavior change anymore. You're just
acting in alignment with the type of person that you already think that you are. And so you have
every reason in the world to show up again and to be that type of person day in and day out.
This is also one of the, perhaps the ultimate reason why habits really matter. You know, like in a
in a sense, we often think about habits as the driver of external results.
And it is true.
Habits can help you lose weight or gain muscle or make more money or, you know, reduce stress.
And all of those external outcomes are great.
But they also are the path through which you reinforce your internal identity.
You know, your habits are how you embody a particular identity.
I mean, every time you make your bed, you embody the identity of someone who is neat and organized.
every time you save for retirement, you embody the identity of someone who is a saver.
Every time you go to the gym, you embody the identity of a fit person.
And so in that way, it's sort of like every action you take is a vote for the type of person that you want to become.
And if you cast enough votes, then eventually you kind of tip the scales and you build up like this evidence of your desired identity and you start to actually believe it about yourself.
Your beliefs have something to root themselves in.
They have something of proof of it.
this, I think, is one of the reasons why small habits matter so much. It's, you know, like on any given day,
you know, if you come home from work and you don't have much time, you're exhausted and you're like,
well, I could do 10 pushups, but like, what does 10 pushups do? I'm not going to get in shape from that.
Which if you're focused on it from a result standpoint, if you're building outcome-based habits,
it's easy to dismiss that. But if you're building identity-based habits, then doing 10 push-ups,
even on a day where you don't feel like it or the circumstances aren't ideal, that's still proof of your desired
identity of being a fit person. And so in this way, small habits can reinforce your identity
and they're meaningful in that way. And if it's, if it's meaningful, then it actually is big,
which is kind of the paradox of these small choices and these little 1% improvements that we
make each day is they feel like nothing, but they end up reinforcing the type of person that you
are and ultimately shaping your beliefs about yourself. And I think that's one of the key
things that habits provide to us in our lives. So if you'd like to start a side hustle,
identify as an entrepreneur.
Start with the identity of, I want to be an entrepreneur and then ask yourself, you know,
who is the type of person that could have a successful side hustle or who is the type of person
that can be an entrepreneur?
And then it's like, well, maybe it's the type of person who makes three sales calls a day
or something like that or one sales call a day.
And then by doing that behavior, by sticking to that habit, you embody that identity
and you cast those votes for being that type of person.
Eventually, you have evidence of it.
I mean, there's a little different than, and I think a little more.
powerful then fake it till you make it, which people will throw that phrase out there. But
fake it till you make it is effectively asking yourself to believe something without having evidence
for it. And there's a word for beliefs that don't have evidence. It's delusion. At some point,
it doesn't stick in your brain because you don't have anything to hold on to. But identity
based habits are sort of the antithesis of that. By practicing the habit each day, you have this
evidence to hold on to. And that helps you stick to the behavior in the long run. But
also to believe that about yourself because you have actual proof of, you know, hey, I did make
sales calls every day for the last two weeks. So I'm being that type of person. And at some point,
as the evidence accumulates, so does the belief. And you end up seeing yourself in that way.
James, thank you so much. Where can people find you if they would like to learn more?
Sure. Yeah. Thank you again for the opportunity. So the book is called Atomic Habits. And you can find
it at Atomichabits.com. In addition to the book being there, there are also a few additional
resources and downloads. So there's a secret chapter that's not included in the book. There are some
bonus chapters on how to apply the ideas to business and how to apply the ideas to parenting.
There are some chapter by chapter audio commentary files from me on like why I wrote each chapter
and some of the research behind it. And then a variety of worksheets and templates and guides.
Anyway, all of that is available at atomic habits.com. Thank you so much. And we will link to that
in the show notes. And I'll say it's a fantastic book. So I highly recommend that everybody read this.
Oh, well, thank you so much. I'm glad you enjoyed it.
Thank you so much, James.
What are some of the heat takeaways that we got from this conversation?
Well, number one, don't believe your own excuses that you tell yourself.
Don't believe the stories that you tell yourself about your own behavior.
Because as we have learned, we are masters of rationalizing ourselves to ourselves.
And if we have formed a bad habit, it can be very easy to tell ourselves the story.
I have to do X because of Y to justify that bad habit in our minds.
Because oftentimes that bad habit does solve the problem that we're trying to solve, at least temporarily.
And so it can be easy to cling to it, to stick with it, and to justify it.
Because it is solving the problem.
But it's not the only thing that would.
If you think about habits in this way, what you realize is that your habits are, in many ways,
your learned solutions to the problems that you face repeatedly throughout life. So if you come home
from work each day and you feel stress and exhausted, then that's a problem in a sense that you need
to resolve. So maybe the cue is walking in from work and the craving is feeling stressed and
anxious or tired and you want to change your state essentially. And so you can imagine a variety of
different habits that could resolve that problem, that could resolve that craving. You could play
video games for an hour, and maybe that's away or watch Netflix for an hour. You could smoke a
cigarette. You could meditate for 10 minutes or go for a run. All of these are viable solutions to the
same kind of fundamental problem. And so what you learn is that the habits that you have right now
are not necessarily the optimal habits. Your original habit is not the optimal habit, not necessarily
the optimal habit for solving that problem. So once you realize that, you start to wonder, well,
how can I change my habits? Can I, you know, design this process rather than being the victim of it?
Once we disconnect from the rationalizations and the stories that we tell ourselves about our own behavior,
we then have the opportunity to become a much more active designer in the process of our behaviors and our lives.
So that's key takeaway number one.
Key takeaway number two.
If you're trying to change a behavior, ask yourself not what that behavior is,
but what outcome you are ultimately trying to achieve and then find some other way.
of achieving that same outcome.
You don't really want to smoke a cigarette.
What you want is to not feel stressed or to reduce anxiety.
You don't really want to go to the gym.
What you want is not the workout, but the result that the workout delivers.
In this way, habits are often driven not by the behavior themselves,
but by our prediction of what that behavior will give us.
If you're trying to break a bad habit, it might be useful to ask yourself,
hey, what do I really want?
Do I really want a tub of ice cream?
Or do I want some emotional soothing right now, some comfort?
And if comfort is the thing that I want, is there a healthier alternative to getting there?
That's key takeaway number two.
Ask yourself what you're really after.
Key takeaway number three.
If you want to change an action, change the physical environment in which it takes place.
For example, if you want to watch less tea,
don't lay out all of your living room furniture in a way in which each piece looks at the TV.
If you want to drink less alcohol, don't suggest to your friends that you guys meet up at a bar.
Suggest somewhere different.
Our environment is a huge driver of our behavior.
So to change behavior, change environment.
If you're constantly being exposed to those triggers to those cues, then you have to resist and overcome that all the time.
And you might be able to do it for a week.
But to do it month after month is very hard.
So in many cases, the most effective way to remove a bad habit is just to reduce exposure to the source.
So that is that third key takeaway to change behavior, change environment.
Key takeaway number four, what you do is a reflection or a vote on who you are.
And so if you want to change some of the things that you do, change your fundamental understanding of who you yourself are.
For example, if you identify as somebody who's part of the fire movement, then that sense of self-identity, that statement, that story that you tell yourself, we're kind of hearkening back to takeaway number one, which is don't believe every story that you tell yourself about yourself. But here's an instance in which it might be productive. If you tell yourself the story that I am somebody who's in the fire movement, then that is going to influence all of the downstream decisions that you make because now,
Now you have an identity, you have a story that you've told yourself, that your actions will need to support.
So I talk about this in chapter two of the book, this idea that I call identity-based habits,
that you're essentially looking to foster this feeling that I am a certain type of person.
And then your habit becomes the way that you embody that identity.
So the goal is not to run a marathon.
It's to become a runner.
Or the goal is not to write a book.
It's to become a writer.
So the goal is not to invest.
It's to become an investor.
The goal is not to save. It's to become a saver or to become a frugal person or a minimalist.
The goal is not simply to do a couple of projects that pick up some extra cash. It's to become an entrepreneur or a hustler.
And the goal is not simply to build passive income. It's to become fire. It's to be part of the financial independence community.
Identity is stronger than action.
So lead with the identity and the actions will follow.
Moving to key takeaway number five, don't ever delay gratification.
Instead, find a way to receive instant gratification from the thing that you want to do.
If you have the attitude that dominant society teaches us that saving money is the equivalent of delaying gratification,
then you're probably not going to stick with it because
Who wants to delay gratification indefinitely?
But if you find inherent gratification in having an unc cluttered home because you're a minimalist,
so you don't really like buying stuff and bringing it into your house because that's just junk and clutter.
Like if you find inherent gratification in that, then guess what?
You're a lot more likely to stick with it.
Because now you're no longer delaying gratification.
You're reframing where that gratification comes from.
The key challenge here when dealing with these habits of avoidance, like not spending money,
is that behaviors like that are inherently unsatisfying.
They're inherently not rewarding because it's like, well, all I'm doing is just resisting, you know,
like I'm just not going to Starbucks or I'm just not eating out for dinner.
And so you need to kind of flip this on its head and find a way to be satisfied in the moment.
So that is key takeaway number five.
Don't delay gratification.
reframe gratification.
Key takeaway number six, focus on the daily actions rather than the results.
This is something that I've written about several times on my blog, afford anything.com.
I've often written that instead of focusing on a goal, on an outcome-oriented goal, focus on the action that you'll take.
So instead of focusing on the goal of I want to lose 20 pounds, focus on.
the goal of, I want to go to the gym every single day this week, or I want to not eat dessert
for the next 30 days. Your actions are inside of your circle of influence. The results are not.
So focus on the actions rather than the outcomes. You're never going to see a story that is a news
story that's like, man eats chicken and salad for lunch today. Like it's, it's not going to be a story
until six months later when it's like, man, loses 100 pounds.
So those are six takeaways that we got from this conversation with James Clear.
I'd love to hear your thoughts.
Head to Afford Anything.com slash episode 156.
Or we've also set up Affordanithinging.com slash James Clear.
Head to either of those.
That's where you'll find the show notes for today's episode.
And leave your comments, thoughts.
Any questions that you have, anything at all related to today's episode?
Also, I have a PDF of.
That article that I talked about that I wrote for Afford Anything, the one about forming goals based on, really, you can kind of think of it as a goal-free existence where you don't have goals, you have actions.
Or if you do still want to frame it as goals, think of it as, all right, you have goals, but they're not result-oriented goals.
They're not goals like I want to lose 30 pounds.
They're goals like, I want to go to the gym.
So you do have goals, but they are action goals.
Anyway, I've got a PDF to the blog post that I wrote about that.
And that is also that PDF I've linked to in the show notes if you would like to dive into this in more depth.
My post on a goal-free existence was one of the most popular posts I've ever written.
We got 115 comments, which took me by surprise.
I didn't think that people would be so into that topic.
Speaking of lots of comments and things that took me by surprise in terms of getting a lot of attention,
Susie Orman has retracted-ish some of the things.
the stuff that she said. I'm just going to read a snippet of her statement because I'm not going to
put words in her mouth. So this is what Susie Orman herself wrote on Facebook. She published it this past
weekend. She says, quote, financial independence? Count me in. Retire early? Eikes. That's where I jump
off the bandwagon. And then she continues to say, in my world, retirement means not working. Full
stop. I was told that this was indeed the focus of fire, and that early was 30s or 40s, not 55.
The math of that makes absolutely no sense, and I said so. But now I realize that I was given bad
information. Retire early for fire followers is not about stopping work completely. It is about
stopping work that you don't like, or just do for the money, and finding work that you actually
enjoy and that fulfills you.
Hello, we are so on the same page.
In fact, I have been telling people that they should never work at a job they hate.
If you want to retire from a long commute, a corporate hierarchy you loathe and work that you don't look forward to, I am 100% cheering you on.
End quote.
So that what I have just read, that is a direct quote from what Susie Orman posted on Facebook, and she actually also posted this on LinkedIn.
She posted it in multiple places this past weekend.
So, wow, it sounds like Susie supports fire.
And in reflecting on it, because I've had a lot of time to think about it,
as the past couple of weeks have unfolded with this story,
this isn't about Susie.
Susie is the headliner, she's a celebrity, but this is not about her.
This is about the misunderstanding around the movement.
If we are talking about the fire movement being misunderstood, then we are implicitly also having a conversation about what the fire movement is.
So I'm going to put up a blog post this week on Afford Anything.com.
It's not up yet as of Monday, October 15.
It's not up yet, but it will be up this week that explores a little bit more into why this story became big, why this is not about.
Susie and why this is about fire and what this means. So if you want to read that, head to
afford anything.com and sign up. There's some boxes there where you can leave your email address.
Subscribe to get updates from afford anything.com so that when I come out with the next blog post,
you will be the first to hear about it. So again, make sure you subscribe so that you can get updates
and also subscribe to this podcast in your favorite podcast player. Just open the app and hit the
subscribe button so that you won't miss any future podcast episodes. We've got some amazing
guests coming up. I'm talking to a woman who I met while I was traveling about how she became
fire when she was in her early 20s and she spent the last 12 years traveling full time.
She is not a blogger, not a podcaster. She doesn't have a social platform. She doesn't have some
kind of famous anything. She's just some woman who I met while I was traveling and she's been doing
it for 12 years. Sweet. Let's hear for more of those people.
That's who I really want to hear from. People who don't have their names out there on the internet who aren't publicly known. And yes, these people are harder to find for exactly that reason, right? They're anonymous. They're spending their time scuba diving. They're not spending their time blogging. Yeah, they're harder to find, but the stories are just so much more on point and relatable for the majority of people who want to have a lifestyle that's more like that. And so we're going to be talking with her coming up in the next handful of weeks or months.
I still haven't hammered out exactly the editorial calendar, but I'm so excited to chat with her because I met her a decade ago while I was backpacking the world.
I've seen her.
I've seen the way she lives.
She's full fire.
She did it in an early age.
And I think you're going to love that interview.
So again, subscribe to this podcast so that you don't miss that.
We've also got Clark Howard coming out on the show.
So after this Uzi Orman interview aired, Clark Howard, who hosts a nationally syndicated radio show, he appears regularly on CNN.
Clark came out in support of the fire movement, and so he is coming back on the show.
He's been a guest once before.
He's going to come back on the show to talk about how he retired when he was 31 and spent a couple of years hanging out on the beach and then went back into a second career that he loved and that brings him meaning.
So Clark is also going to talk about his FI experience.
That's coming up on the podcast as well.
Again, make sure you subscribe so that you don't miss any of this.
Finally, I want to share some incredible news about our charity water campaign.
Now, as you heard in last week's episode, we have a very generous fire member of our community.
His name is Richard Potter, and he is matching donations to our charity water fundraising campaign.
He's matching the donations that we raise in October, November, and December up to a maximum of $4,000.
So at the time that he made that pledge, we had raised $4,000.
And so I challenged this community.
I said, hey, if we can raise another $4,000, then he's going to raise $4,000.
then he's going to match that, which means that we will have raised $12,000, which is enough money that we, the Afford Anything community, can sponsor a water project somewhere in the world.
We can build a well or something like that in an area of the world where people die from diseases caused by unsafe drinking water and poor sanitation.
In an area of the world where people are dying of cholera, we can build a well that gives them that safe, clean drinking water.
We can do it for 12 grand.
And so just last week, not that long ago, I challenged the community, hey, let's raise this additional 4,000 so that he will match it and then we'll have that 12 grand, right?
So as of now, we have a total of $5,900 that we've raised in our charity water campaign.
So what that means, we've raised $1,900 in the last week.
And Richard is going to match that money.
This is incredibly exciting because I think we're going to do it.
I think we're going to hit our goal.
I think we're going to be able to raise $12,000 this year,
which will be enough that we, the community,
will have sponsored a water project.
How cool is that?
There will be kids in this world who drink safe water,
water that's not going to make them sick.
Because of the Afford Anything community that's amazing.
I'm so excited.
Please head to Afford Anything.com.
If you haven't done so already, because this is gaining momentum and it's so cool to head to the Charity Water page every day and watch that balance grow.
It's amazing.
I can't even describe it.
So thank you so much to everybody who's donated.
You know, I want to give a few more shoutouts.
I want to give a thank you to Clara Booth who donated $15 with a note that said, only a little bit as I'm a student, but it all helps.
Thanks for matching the donation, Richard.
and for helping us work towards a worthy cause, Paula.
Love the show.
Clara, thank you.
That 15.
Thank you.
That means the world.
The fact that you're a student and you still gave.
Steve, can we get a round of applause?
So thank you so much to everybody.
Again, you can go to afford anything.com slash water if you want to take part in this amazing campaign.
And thank you so much just for being part of this community.
for everything that you do in terms of sharing these episodes with your family and friends
and participating on Instagram and Facebook and Twitter and reading the show notes and participating in the comments.
Thank you so much for being a part of this community.
What a special place.
Like what an amazing place.
I'm so glad I get to be part of this with you that I get to show up to the microphone
and create something that I love, create my legacy here with you through the internet airwaves.
Wow, what a gift.
Please subscribe to this podcast.
In your favorite podcast player,
please go to affordanything.com, subscribe to the blog posts.
I, you're awesome.
You're super awesome.
My name is Paula Pant.
This is the Afford Anything podcast.
I'll catch you next week.
