Afford Anything - Surviving a $35,000 Credit Card Scam, Job Loss and Foreclosure, with Tiffany Aliche, The Budgetnista

Episode Date: November 29, 2023

#474: When Tiffany Aliche was in her 20’s, she fell victim to a credit card scam. A crafty swindler convinced her to take out a cash advance against her credit card for $35,000. He said that he’d invest the money and produce Bernie Madoff-style returns. She was an inexperienced investor. She believed him. She never saw that money again. Aliche worked at a preschool. She didn’t make much money to begin with. But matters worsened when the school shut down, and she lost her job. She fell behind on mortgage payments and lost her condo. In order to recover from such huge setbacks, she had to grapple with an enormous sense of financial shame. Today, financial educator Tiffany Aliche, better known as The Budgetnista, shares how she overcame financial shame. She talks to us about the opposite of shame, which is a sense of financial wholeness. And she discusses practical tips for how to navigate the challenges of debt and scams. For more information, visit the show notes at https://affordanything.com/episode474 Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

my Netflix co-star, the one, the only Tiffany Aliche, the budget Nista. You are sitting five feet away from me. For the first time since we both had a movie come out, I'm so excited to talk to you. Welcome to the Afford Anything podcast, the show that understands you can afford anything but not everything. So you can afford the things that you love and that you need, but you can't necessarily afford the things that you like and that you want. Yes.

Oh, I see you do that. If you're OG dream catcher, you'll pick up if she's quick. Welcome to the Afford Anything podcast. I'm so excited to talk to you. Let's dive right in with, you talk about financial wholeness. First of all, what's the opposite? Is the opposite of that like half-ness? No.

It's almost like financial brokenness. Well, really, it's the antithesis really to even financial freedom. Because, so I used to teach free school for 10 years. And I remember distinctly that one of the lessons of the lessons of the, I learned is that you're going to have children that are at the top 10%. You'll have a kindergarten or a preschooler that could do algebra, you know, and that's great. And then you'll have some children who struggle at the other end at 10% who they're just going to lead a lot more handholding. Then you'll have 80% of children that are just an average intelligence where what you teach kind of like will reach them, you know?

And so I thought in the financial space, it was weird because I felt like most of the financial education I was seeing was teaching largely to just that top 10%, you know, because that's where the money is, you know. I'm going to show you how to get rich. I'm going to show you, you know, how to make a million dollars in 20 seconds. I'm going to show you how to flip Bitcoin and Forex and, you know, and I just thought that there wasn't enough teaching to this 80%. And I thought, well, what if you don't get fight? financial freedom, then what? No one's answering that. It's like, no, you just have to get financially free. So what if I don't get that pile of money and never work again? So then what, so does that mean my life is like over? I mean, I don't have a good life. And I thought about myself as a preschool

teacher that I might not have ever had this pile of money why I didn't have to work. And I'm like, so what does she do? And I thought, well, the alternative to really financial freedom is financial wholeness. And that's when you master 10 components of your financial life. And if you do that, you can still live a really great life without the pile of money. Right. Right. Okay. I want to dive into those 10 components in a moment, but first, when you were a preschool teacher,

you had, was it $300,000 in debt? Yes. Take us back there. So to be fair, 220,000 of it was a mortgage. About $50,000 plus was student loans for my master's in education. And then about $35,000, give or take was credit card debt as a result of a, financial scam that I was a victim to. Wow. Okay. Let's go back to before that first dollar of debt was ever taken out. Was the first dollar of debt a student loan? Was it? Probably my first dollar of debt was

credit card debt. But because my father was a CPA and an accountant and he has his master's in economics and his bachelor's in finance, he told me very early on that you can go and get one credit card and you have to, if you put books or school things on it, I will pay for that. But anything else, you have to pay for it every month in full. And I was like, he's going to pay for everything. But I would come home during break and he would have the credit card bill on the dining table and highlighted all the things, McDonald, CVS, things that were not school related. And he would be like, you owe me $75 or $50 or whatever that was.

So early on, I learned that when it came to debt, you take care of it as quickly as possible. Right. You know, and so my first dollar of debt was really credit card debt, but in a way that was healthy. I used it. I paid it off. Right. Tell me about then when you decided to go for your master's in education, you decided to take out that loan. At the time that you took it out, did you know what that would mean for your future? Even then, because I was getting my master's and I was in my mid-20s, I guess. I graduated college, my undergrad at probably about 2021.

And I did have some undergraduate money that I owed, but I commuted from home. So it wasn't super significant. And I was able to pay that off. And then I want to say I went for my master's. I must have been like 23 or 24. And I was lazy about getting scholarships I probably should have. Yeah. I went to a private school, Seton Hall University in New Jersey.

And it was expensive. And so I took out student loans. And even then I didn't fully understand like what it meant to borrow that money. having to pay it back. And so by the time I graduated and it was like the first time I had real debt, I call it, because it was a significant amount of debt. And I didn't really have a plan for paying it off. I was like, I guess I'll just defer until I figured out. I don't know what it was originally, maybe 30 or 40, but then by the time I really started to tackle it, it was about $52,000 because it'd grown. Wow. What was your salary at the time? What were you making?

At the time, when I first started teaching preschool, I was making $39,000. And probably by then, maybe I had gotten to 40, between 40 and 42,000 by the time I was getting my master's. Wow. So your student loans exceeded one year's salary. Yes, you know, and because, you know, teachers just don't make much. And I remember one time I said, like, I mentioned that I made $39,000 starting as a teacher, which in New Jersey, it's not enough money to support yourself, really. And someone wrote me and said, you're lying. That's way over.

And I thought, yes. I thought she thought I was lying and I was like exaggerating how low it was. And when she said it, I thought, wow, I can't believe we're paying teachers even less than that. And she was like, no, when I started, she was in New Jersey as well. She said, I can't remember whatever she was making. It was like 31 or something. So I had to go back, find it, screenshot. And I was like, well, I'm sorry they paid you 31 because that's grossly underpaying.

There are some places that start, quote unquote, higher, but still really not high enough to support yourself. Wow. And so then tell me about the mortgage, the scam, which one came next? So next came the mortgage. I was 25 and I was like, you know, making, I thought, decent money by then. Maybe by then I was in my, it was making in the mid 40,000, maybe 45, 46 in that range. Plus, I was also babysitting and tutoring. So I was making probably close to $50,000.

was a year and I didn't have any credit card debt then. I just had that student loan debt and my interest rate was very reasonable. I remember it was around like three or four percent, you know, so it wasn't anything that couldn't handle. And there were federal student loans. So I think by then I might have been pushing them off. So I'm like, okay, I'm in a place now where I'd saved a lot of money too. I was a really good saver.

And I'd saved between tutoring, babysitting, and teaching. I'd saved nearly $30,000 since I started teaching. So it took me about a little three years or so because my first year out of college, I stayed home and saved. And I bought a used car for $5,000. So I didn't have a car note. And when my sister and I moved out, I was 21, 22, and she was 23. And we rented a home, a small home that was $1,200, so $600 a piece. And it included everything.

So it was really good. So people are like, how are you able to save so much? I might go, one, my rent was $600 because we found this house. It was like this older lady who owned a daycare center next door, and she just wanted two nice young girls to live here. So she rented to us really cheap. And so, like I said, I didn't have a car note. My car insurance was really low because I didn't have a car note. So my overhead for life was extremely low, even though my income wasn't really high.

And I was kind of side hustling on the side. And that's how I was able to save nearly $30,000 in about three years. Wow, this sounds exactly like the story of my 20s. Exactly. Every single thing that you're saying is spot on exactly what my, my early to mid-20s was like. So I was financially perfect until about 26. And I was like, you know what? Let's burn it all down to the ground. Yeah. And that's what I did. I went out and I was looking for a home because I felt like, well, what's the next step in adults, financial growness? And I decided that I was going to buy a property, you know. So I found this condo because I was like, I don't want to mow the lawn or shovel if I don't have to. I found this two-bedroom, one-bath condom for $220,000. My sister said she'd move with me and then pay rent.

I'm like, oh, that'll help with the mortgage. And that's what I really started to get antsy about, well, I've gotten some of my bases covered. I want money. I want wealth. And I know I'm not going to get at teaching preschool. There has to be some other way to generate income other than tutoring and babysitting. And I had who I thought was a friend of mine that I called Jake the Thief. He drove like a Lamborghini.

He lived in New York. He was, like, living in a penthouse. All the, you know, like, yeah, all the trappings of like what I thought. I mean, obviously, I'm adult enough now to realize that that doesn't mean anything. Right. He probably was running the Lamborghini. Wherever he's living, he might have been like house sitting for someone, you know? Right, right.

But at the time, you know, in your 20s, you don't know that. And I told him, I want to learn how to invest because it seems like that's how you've grown your wealth. And he said, sure. And the first rule of thumb, he told me, he said, is to you. use other people's money to invest. And I said, oh, I didn't know he meant my money. It was what, you know, if you were watching my life as a movie, oh, dun, dun, don't, don't.

Oh, I can hear the, I can hear the scary music playing. They're like, yeah. I was like, okay. And he said, do you have credit cards? I said, well, just this one that I pay up every month in full. I didn't really have anything on it. And he was like, no, you can, your credit is really good. You could open up other credit cards and pull money off of them.

And I was like, I didn't know that. And so that's called a cash advance and it's the worst. Because the interest on the cash advance is astronomical. And so he was like, yeah, open up these other credit cards. And so I opened up, I was like two or three. And then he said pull money off and that money we're going to use to invest, which I don't even know why I thought you could put off cash. Like, what does that even have to do with investing? But, you know, to my defense, I was 25.

Yeah. And this was another like movie moment. I remember distinctly it was Wells Fargo. I had one of the cards from. and I was pulling off like $10,000 or $50,000 something crazy. And I remember because a Wells Fargo was up the street from the child care center where I worked. And when we worked at the child care center, you changed into like a nursing scrub so that way you can play with the kids without worrying about messing up your clothes. Right.

And I was like such a kid. So my nursing scrubs had like teddy bears on that. I had like pink pants. So I'm like literally at the bank like waiting. And I remember they kept me there for like an hour because they thought something was wrong. It was. And they were like, are you okay? And I'm like, yes, they're like, is someone forcing you to do this?

And all these red flags were. Oh, like, like if you were being trafficked or something. Yes. And I was like, I mean, you would think like blinking red flags. And I was like, clearly colorblind. Like, do, too, do. Wow. And they were like, are you sure?

They kept having all these people come out. And I was like, what is the big deal about taking money off of a card? So they were just like, you know, you don't have a history. Right. Of this, you know? And I was just like, okay. I took the money out and off other cards. And so here's what the plan was supposed to be.

He was a French citizen. And he supposedly had boutiques in France. And he was like, you know how you buy things here in America? Tiffany, that are French and they're more expensive. Well, in France, they love American things. And we could charge more. So like Converse and Levi's and very easy. I could sell them in my stores or sell them like wholesale.

Buy them wholesale here. Sell them there at a premium because, you know, they want American things. And I said, okay. He said, that's what I'm going to use the money for. I'm going to purchase these things. We're going to ship them over in a barrel. And then this just sounds so crazy. Every week for two years, I'll pay you $2,000.

That that's what this, whatever, I think I gave him $20,000. How? I look back at it, I'm like, the math doesn't math. But at the time, I was like, wow, that seems like a great return. Of course, I was like, meanwhile, my father with his whole master's in economics and and investors in finance, I'm like, totally not going to tell him because I'm in a And when I'm rich, I get to be like, look, it did a thing. I know you're so proud of me.

So I didn't ask him. And so I, you know, handed over the money. We had a contract. So I was like, well, clearly I'm good because we signed this contract. It didn't take him two weeks to be gone. It took a year of him stringing me along. He would say, like, you didn't get the money? Check with your bank.

Are you okay? You sure? You know, like I just sent it or I'll send it tomorrow. So it was a year of that. So I held off hope like, okay. The real mistake I made was that after I gave him that money, I still had to ruin my credit card. And I was like, you know, once I got used to using it, I was like, okay, I'm about to be rich. I want to take, now we all know about these expensive online courses that are not the greatest.

But I didn't know that then. I signed up for an online course about how to grow businesses or whatever it was. And it was a very well-known financial person that's still like in business today. and it was $15,000. So I went from, I owed the $20,000 off my card. And then within a week, I said, well, money's about to come in and I want to know how to use that to invest to start a business. So I'm going to pay $15,000 for this course. So within one week, I went from no credit card debt to $35,000.

And I was happy about it. I was like, ooh, I can't wait to be rich in two years. Wow, wow. But it was the best thing that could have happened because until that, up until that, until then the financial choices that I made were kind of like, my dad told me to do it. And so I needed to learn for myself, one, what does it look like when like you've made every mistake possible? You know, and I just kept, it was just compounding and compounding. Then it was 2009 when that happened with session hits. And then I was like, well, teachers don't lose their job. I lost my job.

Then I lost my conducts. I couldn't afford the market. It was compounding. Everything within a span of I want to say 27 to 30, it was like I couldn't catch a financial break. And it kind of ended with me the $300,000 in debt and accumulating because of interest. I ended up moving back home with my parents, which I'm fortunate to have, because everyone can't do that, you know, whether their parents are even here or able to support them or, you know, maybe they live really far away. And I was able to move back home with my parents. But I just was in a really deep state of depression because I just made all these mistakes. and I finally fessed up to them, like, you know, the mistakes that I made. And I was, I remember my 30th birthday.

I spent it in my middle school bed back home. I remember distinctly thinking when I was in middle school, I used to like babysit and like paper around. I remember I had saved up $2,000 because I had done all that for like some years. Yeah. And I remember thinking I had more money the last time I laid in this bed than I do now at 30. Wow. I just remember thinking that.

Like I had more money as a teenager the last time I laid in this bed. that I do now as a 30-year-old woman. The one smart thing I did do was I transferred it over to balance transfer credit cards. Like right before, there's a moment before when you make your financial mistakes and it hits the credit bureaus. So there was like this little gap of time where I still, on paper, had good credit. So I was able to get credit cards to transfer those that balance over to balance transfer cards. And I got balanced transfer cards for a two-year one. So it was like you have two years to really.

buckle down. I told my best friend, Linda, who I had been kind of dodging all my friends for like that year that I was kind of depressively at home. I told her just crying like, you know, I did this and this and this and this. And the Tiffany that you guys know is like so good with her money is not so good with her money? And she was like, is that it? Girl, about you kick somebody's puppy the way you been hiding out. She's like, I'm calling you from my mother's couch right now. And I had not really looked around to see what the recession was doing to all my friends in their 20s. And then I realized that I wasn't alone and that I had not kicked anyone's puppy and that I had just made a series of mistakes and I can make a series of solutions happen. And I told myself as I was digging my way out because I grew up in a household where we learned about money all the time.

I knew how to budget. I knew how to save. I knew how to raise my credit. I knew how to manage debt. But shame will shield solutions from you because you're so wrapped up in the shame. And so as I started to map out solutions, the teacher in me created like almost like internal lesson plans. for it. And then friends of mine were like, can you show me how you're doing it? And I would be like, sure. So I would show them kind of like my own notebook of lesson plans of like first I do this,

then this. And then they would tell friends of friends and friends and I thought, could this be a business? And I started off doing one-on-ones. And then I started off creating lesson plans for organizations like the United Way and teaching them. And then started teaching at colleges and things and speaking. And the budgetista was born. But I never, forgot that lesson. That's why I said it was the best thing I could have ever happened. Because let's just say I'm 44 now that I never had kind of like the dark financial times that I had. I didn't know how to empathize. Right. You know, when someone comes to me and they tell me about their financial challenges, I'm not like, oh, I'm like, yeah, I know how scared you must feel.

Yeah. How ashamed you must feel. Right. Because I lived in that space for so long, you know, and I just never thought I was going to get out of it. I just thought this is my way. I just thought this is my life now. I remember thinking you're such a loser, Tiffany. Like, as I was like tears streaming down my eyes as I'm looking, sleeping in my middle school bed, looking at the ceiling, like, 16-year-old Tiffany would be so ashamed of you. I mean, all the terrible things that you tell yourself. Right. And so I've lived it. And so I know that we have to get to that empathy first. And so when I had the opportunity to write, made home, my new workbook, I said, I want to make sure I create a space before getting to the work of a workbook. Right.

work of the emotional work of forgiving yourself and creating space and grace for yourself. So the work actually works. Wow. So you said something that the shame shields solutions. Yes. How do you get through that? Because I've been also scammed before. I remember thinking, like reflecting back on all of the little decisions that I made in my 20s to save like a little bit of money here a little bit. All of the times that I skipped out on the proverbial latte and the avocado toast, which I don't care about latte is an avocado toast, but there were things that I did care about that I chose not to spend money on for the sake of frugality, for the sake of saving. And then that moment happens and you get scammed and you're like, for me, just reflecting on

all of it, it just made the frugality feel so meaningless. Yes. One of the things I learned through therapy is that the only way to release shame, is to give voice to it. You have to tell someone. Your therapist, your mom, your dad, someone who is not going to judge you, who's going to give you a safe space to land. And so for me,

it was my best friend, Linda. Because shame loves silence. Yeah. You know, it's like, don't say anything. Stay here with me, you know? Right. So shame is like the Disney villain, you know? It's like, nobody's going to understand.

Everyone's going to think, like, what a fool you are. Look at you. you look at you, look at you. And the moment you tell someone that cares about you, and they're like, is that all? You're all of a sudden you're like, is it all? Is it as big as I've made it feel? Right. So there's an African proverb that says, fear makes the wolf bigger than he is.

So you're terrified of this wolf on the other side of the door. This wolf is going to eat me alive. And you open it. It's like a little puppy. You know? And so, like, that's step, first step is to find someone you trust and she. share, I can almost guarantee you they're going to be like, oh, well, last year or two years ago or currently right now, I too am struggling in this way.

Right. So creating, like have someone who's going to create safe space for you. How do you know that somebody will be safe, right? Because sometimes the worst thing that can happen is that you share something vulnerable with someone and they react badly, you know, or they say the exact wrong thing. I knew Linda would be safe because I had told her other things that weren't financing. things and I knew her reaction to them. I knew that I could not tell my dad.

Right. Because I knew who's going to be like, I mean, my dad is like so many immigrant parents, you know, they love you so much, but the judgment is high. Oh, yeah. Yep. Right. So my African name is Adochi, my Nigerian name. Adachi, wow, why would you do that?

You know, it's a place of love, but it's like there's a harshness there that's not intended. Yeah. It's like, why didn't you tell me? Wow, so foolish. Yeah, yeah. Yep. And you're like, I didn't be in this like.

Yeah. But I knew that about my father, that although from a well-intentioned place, you know, that that's not the energy I needed. Right. And I knew that just because I knew his reaction to other things. And so I knew Linda is a type you could be like, so I burned down the house. And she's going to be like, well, maybe it's because, like, Linda won't. You know, me, no matter what it is, Linda is going to be trying to find them. Well, sometimes these things happen.

then. You know, like, so I knew she was the safest person that I knew that I could share that with and she was going to give me kind of like that energy back. And so when I wrote Made Whole, one of the things I thought about, it was across that, like thought about my journey. And so in it, I give you an opportunity where if you don't have a safe space, so I created a group of, it's mostly women, but we don't turn any men away, a group called dream catchers, where it's over two million dream catchers worldwide. And so we were present on Facebook. We have like a private group on this platform called Mighty Networks. Oh yeah. We're on Mighty. Our communities on Mighty Networks too. Yeah. And so like so even if you don't have someone, because you might say, I don't have anyone in

your life, there are communities online where it's literally a financial community and the purpose is to create a safe space to share and work through your your challenges with. And so maybe you have a therapist. Like I said, maybe it's your work mom, you know, but knowing if it's a safe space or not is have I shared here before and receive the grace and space that I've needed? If so, then I can, for the most part, feel pretty confident that this is a place I can do that. If you're not sure, then share just a little bit and see that reaction and just see how, like, how they respond and then you know, like, okay, I can release the other things. Before we actually get to the work, which is great, we need to, like, address how you feel and who you are.

So even if I do one-on-ones, which I don't do really anymore, except for, like, family and friends, the first thing I say is tell me your story. So it's not like, well, let's get into budgeting. Let's get known. How do we get here? Tell me your story because I want people to release that shame, to share whatever it is that's holding them back. Because I know that no amount of solutions are going to work unless we get rid of that gunk first. The holidays are right around the corner. And if you're hosting, you're going to need to get prepared. Maybe you need bedding, sheets, linens. Maybe you need serveware and cookware. And of course, holiday decor, all the stuff to make your home a great place to host during the holidays.

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From November 25th to December 2nd, your donation will be doubled. That means every dollar goes twice as far to help Build a future where no one's seeking help is left behind. Donate today at camh.ca.ca.com.ca. Slash giving Tuesday. In terms of the 10 steps to wholeness, do you see shame kind of show up as you address every step? Or is shame something that has to be overcome before you can even begin the 10 steps? So to start, you have to release some of it.

You know, you're not going to ever release all of it, but like, you know, throughout. And you might not ever release all of it. You know? Yeah. But you have to release some of it. So like I said, the first activity is like, find somebody you trust. Find someone you can share this with. And also too, ideally, maybe they can be your accountability partner as you do these 10 steps. Right. So as you go through, if shame comes up for you, you have a place to send, this is where I messed up before. I always have a budget and I never do it. Mm-hmm. You know, so it's just like, so your friend can be like, yeah, me too. Yeah. That's what we could check in with each other every Friday. Or, you know, what if we automated it and we didn't

have to worry about it? Or, like, you know, maybe you did save. Like, I had a friend of mine who she had saved and saved and saved and she was really happy because she wanted to buy a house or a car or something. And then something broke down in her life, you know, and she had to address it with the money she'd saved in her emergency savings. And her initial reaction was like, oh, this always happens. Like, what's the point? And I was like, well, I know you here once again. I have like an emergency. What I hear is, oh my gosh, I actually have emergency savings for an emergency. How awesome is that?

Right. And she was like, wait, I didn't think about it. I'm like, because I said before you would have the emergency without the savings. Right. And she was like, right. I was like, you know, like how awesome is that that like you actually can address the emergency without disrupting the rest of your financial life? And it's a reframe.

Right. Exactly. And so like, you know, having your account. accountability partner work through you as you work through your 10 steps to homeless can really be helpful, but at the very least having someone in the beginning to do that initial opening up. Right. That reframe is so critical. So we actually, we cut this from the Netflix movie.

We had to cut it for time. But Lindsay, who I was working with, the exact situation happened with her where she'd been saving and saving and saving and then she needed a car repair. She initially was feeling really down because she was like, I've been side hustling. I've been walking dogs. I've been doing like freelance art. Like I've made all of the side hustle income and then boom, now it just goes back into my car. You know?

I gave her that exact reframe. I was like, Lindsay, Lindsay, what I hear is you have the money. Yes. You have the money to be able to address this car issue. Yes. Yeah. Isn't that amazing, you know? And so to see someone kind of like light up and say, oh, I never thought about that because I never.

would have been ready before. So let's go over the 10 steps since we've alluded to it. Yeah. So the reason why I call the book Made Whole is because it's like at the end, my hope is that you will holistically get to this full financial life. Each of these 10 steps is 10%. And so as you do them, you're like, well, I'm 20% whole. And then at the end, you're 100%.

Right. So the first five steps are the foundational steps. That is count of budget. Save. get out of debt or at least manage your debt, responsibly, credit, and learning to earn. So those are the foundational steps. If you do those first and foremost,

it's a really great place to be like, okay, you know, I feel secure and relatively safe. And the next five steps build upon that. So that is investing for both wealth and retirement. That is your insurance to protect your assets. That is your net worth, you know, making sure you own more than you own. Right.

That is your financial team. You know, like building a team around you because money is a team sport. And lastly, that is a state planning. So those steps. Yes, like the, yes, leaving a legacy. And so if you do those 10 steps and you really get good at them, then you will have a good solid financial life to build the rest of your life on. You don't have to have the pile of money at the end of the rainbow and never have to work again.

I mean, that's awesome. If you get that. But if you never make your million dollars, you can still live a very great life. And you can be made whole as a result of it. Right. Step five, learning to earn. You can spend an entire lifetime doing just that because that learning to earn, developing new skills, learning how to apply those skills to side hustles and grow those into businesses. I mean, that is a work of 100 years.

Yes. So in that step, I tried to make sure we ran the gamut. I said, okay, I want you to learn to earn where you currently work. Like, how do you ask for a raise? How do you, what I call illustrate your Oprah, like illustrate your overwhelming value? So that way your job says, oh, my gosh, we're actually not giving you a raise. This is just a payroll correction. Right.

You should have been paying you more all this time. But also, how do you earn outside of your regular job? If you wanted to side hustle, what does that look like? I have some rules for side hustling that I go over to make sure you make the most. of your time. And if you wanted to have a business, what does that look like if you want to make money like outside of that? Yeah. So let's go for the rules of your rules of side hustling to make sure that you're making the most of your time. So what I go over is that, well, one, I say ideally you want to look for a side hustle that either you have a certificate

or a degree in like the subject matter that you're, that you're going to be side hustling. That's already your expertise. Yes. Right. Or something that you're already doing. So, for example, when I used to tutor, I could charge more because I was already a teacher and I had my master's in education. Right. So if everybody else is getting paid $25 an hour, I could demand 50. Right. Because they're like, well, you have your master's in education. So yes.

So it allows you to charge more. And then the second rule is, ideally something that you are currently doing, something similar. So when I tutored or babysat, I didn't have to learn and do skill. Right. You know, remember, side hustle, the purpose of a side hustle is just strictly to make money. It's not like, you know, this is not your passion for life, you know. So for me, it meant that I didn't have to, after work, also think about now I have to learn how to bake cakes because, wait, it's like, no, no, no. It's just an extension of, you do this. Tiffany, I could tutor and babysit, eyes closed.

You know what I mean? So it's like, because the purpose of the side hustle was not to grow. I wasn't, unless, you know, you're wanting to like start like a business on the side. But it was just, I need to make money. And the third rule is it needs to make money. Right. You know? Because sometimes we do stuff and you're like, okay, you're doing all this backwork,

but you need to make money now. You know, like that's why sometimes I feel so disheartened when I see people invest $1,000, $10,000, whatever money to learn how to side hustle because it's like hustling backwards. You know what I mean? Like because it's like you're investing all of this money to learn something new. I much rather if you are a maintenance man, say at a school, that you do handyman work on the weekends. You know what I mean?

So it's just like I don't, I know how to fix stuff. That's an interesting distinction between, I guess, a side hustle versus a side business. Yes. Right? A side hustle is just, you're just hustling for some dollars. A side business. Yes. You're more, you know, because then you might want to invest and say, I do.

Like, you know what? I'm interested in photography. I want the side hustle to maybe one day become a business. so I don't mind buying the camera. Right. Of course, I wasn't starting a tutoring company. Right, right. I was like, I'm here for the coin and make sure these babies learn how to read.

Yeah. So other than that, I was like, then I don't want to invest any more additional time or money into learning how to do this thing. Right. You know, so I'll give you an example. My friend Linda, I talked to you about before, she is a social worker. She's what she went to school for. She's currently getting her master's.

Her grandmother lived with her and it was really ill for a long time. So Linda as a social worker, plus having her grandmother at home, got really good at getting resources that were available. So her grandmother, for example, they needed a ramp. So there are people she's helped that needed transportation to the doctor's office. Or someone would actually come and clean your home. There's all of these like social services that you might not know that you can have, but you need someone to advocate for you. So she started to become what I used to call her, like the name of her side hustle business was the on-call advocate. Where you would call Linda and for like $100 or whatever it is, she would advocate on your behalf because her social work background.

Right. She was doing that already at work. Yeah. And then she also had the heart for it because she also saw it firsthand through her grandmother like people weren't as open. And she was like, no, no, statute 2221 says that she does get groceries delivered to her house. Wow. You know, can you get your supervisor on the phone? or no, she is eligible for a ramp.

And people didn't even know that they had these eligibility. But what a great way to take what she was doing at work, all that she was learning, and she didn't have to learn this new skill set. She took it in. And, you know, this on-call advocate was great. Plus, too, she loved to do it. Right. You know, she was like, I love when someone gets something.

They're like, wait, I get groceries. I get a visit to the doctor and I don't have to drive. It's like, yeah. Wow. You know, these things are. available to you. So another example is my friend Rihanna. I met her because I was, I was renovating my home. And I posted like on social looking for like a designer. And a joint friend of ours was like, oh, my friend Rihanna, I think she might be a really good fit.

Rihanna was, she has her master's in design. And she worked mostly for corporate. So she would work for different hotels and stuff to redesign rooms and things. But she really wanted to get into residential. It was like, here's my main job working for corporate. I have my degree in architecture and design. But I wanted to get into this like residential where I don't really have an inn. But it's a side hustle that I hope one day to become a main hustle. So for her first kind of like foray was like she became an adjunct professor at a school. So that was one of her first side hustles to see, can I make extra money on the side?

And she could, but she knew I don't want to be a professor like for real, for real. Right. You know, this was just that was the actual side hustle, side hustle. But the side business was, I met her and I was her first client. And she was like learning. Like I don't need to learn the design part. That's what I do. But this other residential part, it's different.

The client is different. It's way more personal. You know, they don't have a, a billion dollar budget like corporate. How does that look like working? I have to build my own team. In corporate, it's like I make the design and they hire whoever. But here, it's like I've got to find the contractor and the electrician and the plumber. And so it's been, I want to say, five or six years.

And I just bought a new condo. She's doing my new condo now, but she's had so many clients since then. And she's left corporate since then. She's not an adjunct professor anymore. This is her full-time business and job now. That's amazing. So she was able to make this transition from like she loved to do the work, but not in corporate. Right.

And so like that. So just keeping that in mind that it's okay to do a thing just because it makes you money. Right. But it's also okay to say, here's the thing that makes me money. but I think I also may want this to be like my thing thing because you cannot save your way to wealth. Exactly. You know, so it's like I wanted that to be part of the foundational part of the book because I want you to learn to make money and then what to do with it after in the second half of the book. Right.

And I love that distinction. Like when you start, is this a hustle? Or am I planting the seeds of what I hope to one day be my thing thing? Yes. My full-time business. Yes. I like that. Black Friday is here at IKEA and the clock is taking one.

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from the PC Holiday Insiders Report. Please feast responsibly. Of those foundational pieces, budgeting, saving, you know, I think we can kind of skip over those. The investing piece, I'm assuming your index funds passively managed as a teacher. Are there any pieces of that

that have been difficult for people to understand or where you've gotten pushback? One of my roles as a teacher is to never tell you what to do, but to give you all the information so you can make the best choice for you and

it. Right. So even though that's what I would suggest, like, oh, index funds and then, you know, fee only. But instead, so in the investment chapter, I open up with, one, the difference between investing for retirement and investing for wealth. I think one of the worst sayings or phrases that came out of the financial space is when people say, I'm saving for retirement. I know. I hate that. Yeah, I've had that thought so many times. I hate that phrase. Yes, because you're not saving for retirement. Right. You're investing for retirement. Yeah. Because you say that, especially women I find, like, oh, I don't invest. You do.

Right. You're investing. You know, maybe not actively, but you are. And so one, I wanted people to understand that when you invest for retirement, I do this fun activity where I'm like, look around, look at your couch, look at your TV. That's the life you're going to have in retirement. When you invest for retirement is to maintain your current lifestyle. Because I think on TV you see people talk about investing for retirement and you're going to live on an island. No.

Investing for retirement is to help maintain your current lifestyle. It is the basis of like everyone should be doing investing. But when you invest for wealth, which is once you get the retirement part down, it's kind of automated, we're good. Investing for wealth is to improve your current lifestyle and leave a financial legacy. So I'd like to separate those because not everybody wants to invest for wealth. And that's okay. You know, but everybody needs to invest for retirement. So you can maintain your lifestyle that you can eat healthy.

You can live someplace safe. You can get the medicine and the health care that you need. And so we start with investing for retirement and all the ways that you can do so. Like whether you're self-employed, whether your job offers a 401k or not. What is even a 401K? You know, like what is a Roth IRA? What is a regular IRA? So there's a lot of definitions in that chapter because I find people are like,

oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm like, the teacher and me, you know, when you talk for a long time, you can tell in students' faces, you're like, they don't know what I'm talking about. Yeah, yep. Like, I remember when I used to teach preschool, I would be saying, okay, today, guys, we're going to learn, A, A, like Apple. And there would be a couple kids like, what's an apple? And so I'm realizing like, okay, we got a doll all the way back.

Let me go get an apple from the kitchen. I'm like, this is an apple. Oh, okay, okay, okay, okay. One thing I'm really good at now is that I actually don't need the student in front of me to know when you're not going to get it. And so there are parts in May Hole where I go, I double back to re-explain again in a different way. Right. Because I know that you might not get it. Now, some people are going to breeze right through only because I've taught that lesson enough to know the questions that I've gotten for people.

Yeah. Like, so what is that again? And I'm like, so I will rephrase it someplace else in a different way. So that would you get it twice? And so that's what the first half of that chapter is all about investing for retirement, ideally automating it. If you don't do anything else, like, you know, looking into a target date fund. Yeah.

If you don't do anything else, but understanding the fees involved and just like what to look for, you know, because later on in the book I share about looking for a financial advisor. And I want you to have the tools and the language to have a conversation. Right. Because every profession has its own language. Yeah, exactly, exactly. And then the second half is really the fun half for me, which is of that chapter, which is investing for wealth, right?

And so there, I'm like, before we get started, let's do a quiz of what kind of investor are you? Are you passive? Are you active? Are you in between? You know, are you someone? And then I have you do like a fun quiz to kind of figure out, are you someone who kind of like, I want to get my hands dirty?

I don't mind doing research every week. Are you like every once in a while I don't mind doing a little research but I'm busy or if you're like hands off, I don't even know what to do. Right. So because I want to identify what that is. And then the vehicles, here's what it looks like to do everything yourself. Here's what it looks like to do it yourself with a guidance. You know, here's what it looks like to watch on the sidelines as someone is doing it but still watching. Right.

Right. I do something similar. I teach a course on real estate investing. And at the beginning of the module around how to find. find a property, I start that off with a quiz. And it's like, what's your finding personality? Okay. Because there are these different archetypes, right? There's the archetype of like the deal maker. And those are the people who they're looking for off market deals and they're doing so by just building their network and talking to people. And there are some people who like, they're extroverts.

And they're just, that's, they love that kind of like chit chat with a wide group of people. And that's really their thing. And then there are other people who are like, hunters, you know, and they're more data-driven. And so like I put the students through this quiz and they're all of these, you know, it points you to an archetype and that archetype really illustrates your personality, your likes, your dislikes, your skills, your interests. And that guides the investment choices that you make. Yes. If you are a passive investor and then you're like, oh, I bought all these like stock courses. I don't know I'm not doing well. I'm like, because you're, you're not really up for doing the weekly, daily work of hunting and finding stocks.

And there's nothing wrong with that. Yeah. It's just like, you know, you are a, what is it, a square peg trying to fit into a round hole. Right. What I'm saying is like there is success no matter what kind of investor you are. Yeah. Find the fit that's the fit for you. Exactly.

So in that chapter we go through that. We talk about like now that you know your investment personality, you know, here are some vehicles that might be a fit. you know, maybe you need a financial advisor if you're like totally hands off. You know, ETFs or neutral funds, you know, might be, especially ETFs if you're more in between because it lets you do a little something, but not all the things. If you're hyperactive, you're like, so maybe you want to invest, you know, in stocks and pick your own stocks. And so we kind of go over like what your choices are.

And there's no judgment on any of the choices. It's just choosing a choice that's best for you. And what does that look like so you can have success no matter what you choose. Right. And I go through kind of like the pros and cons. you know, like a beach. We all know what stocks is like the greater risk, but the greater reward. Right.

You know, and with mutual funds is that certainly you don't have to do nearly as much, but you pay for that handholding. That fee is going to be higher, you know, and then if a financial advisor, it's going to be even higher because you have super handhold, super specific to you. And there's nothing wrong with that. But you should just know that there's cost, you know, for every, you know, every choice that you choose. And so I'm not here to tell anybody what to choose,

but here are your choices so you can make the best ones for you. And so I've had people say, I remember there was this young woman named Deja, who's now my mentee. She was on TikTok, and she made my first book, my first traditionally published book, Gicker with Money, go viral. She was like 22, 23, and she was like, this book has helped me. I have an IRA, a Roth IRA. I didn't even know what that was before.

And I thought that was so awesome for her that it was broken down enough that she was like she felt confident to go and, and get one for herself in a way she's like, I get it now. I know what to choose. I know what kind of an investor I am. I know how to automatically have my money deposited and I know where to put my money. So once it's in there, the investment part is so critically important because making money is only the first step. Growing it is essential.

That's why specifically of the 10 steps I wanted to call out those two, you know, the learn to earn and the invest, right? Invest for, and I love the framework of distinguishing investing for retirement. which is, which we all must do, whether we want to or not, like, it's a, it's a requirement versus investing for wealth, you know, which is optional. Yes. Yes. And I want people to realize that. I think because we conflate the two that's like, some people would be like, well,

I don't want to be rich. It's like, okay, then don't. But you don't want to be safe in your retirement, I would hope. Right. You know, so make sure you just focus your energy there. Do you work with a financial advisor? I do. Her name's Anjali.

She's awesome. Because I had reached, the budget needs to start. just do really well, I want to say maybe, I mean, it was doing well, but financially well for me. I want to say five or six years ago, just really started to pick up in a way that it was beyond the scope of what I could manage. Right. And I'd been really scared to get a financial advisor because I'd made a mistake, you know, with Jake the thief. Right. So I was afraid to ask someone for help again because I equated help might mean I might get scammed again. First things first, I said, you have to ask around. I need a CPA. I need a, I need,

a financial advisor. I need a whatever that is. And what I did was I list four or five people that you might need. I say everyone must have an accountability partner. You know, like that's just important. You know, but then you might may or may not need an accountant or CPA. You may or may not need an insurance agent. You may or may not need a financial advisor. These are things that I listed explain what they do and how they get paid. But I make it clear, I want you to know what they do to see if you need that or not. Now I know that there's websites. You know, like XYZ planning and wealth ramp and things. But at the time, I posted on like social media to my friends on Facebook.

I was like, hey, looking for a financial advisor. Please share. If you have one or you know one that's great, share them in the comments. And then it was maybe like 15 or 20 people in the comments. And I just remember like thinking, this is overwhelming. I don't want to interview 20 people. How do I have them pre-vete themselves? And so I created for myself a document.

call my so-called financial life. You know, like remember if some of you guys are too young, I grew up with my so-called. Right? With Claire Dames. Yeah. So I called it that. And it's everything you need to know about Tiffany and her money. How old I was, how much credit I had.

My business is everything that you can think of. I mean, not like my bank numbers or anything like that. You know, just like how much money, what was navigating through my life, you know. Like a snapshot. Yes. What my financial goals and dreams were. Basically, I thought to myself, if they were to interview me, what questions are they likely to ask? Because I know me, I'm going to meet you and forget, oh, I forgot to tell them that I have this one credit card.

So I'm like, I don't want to do that. Plus, I really wanted, like, here's what I want to accomplish. By the age of 50, I want to have this amount of money. Do you think you can help me with these things? And of the 20, so I emailed them, said, hey, such as such recommends you a financial advisor looking for someone. I created a document, you know, with my financial life. in a snapshot and my hopes and goals and dreams. Do you think you can help?

I was a business owner of multiple businesses as well as, you know, I owned some real estate as well as just me personally. And what I love, and this was unintentional, but what I loved is, people came back to me and said, this is so great, I actually wouldn't be a fit for you. I focus on DeFourzis. I focus on school teachers. I focus on, so about six of them pulled themselves out of the running, which great. Perfect.

Perfect. That's exactly what you want. I mean, and I thought, that wasn't really, I didn't know what I was thinking that was going to happen. I just thought, oh, they'd see it. We'd have a call. At least it'd have all my stuff. But I thought, how awesome is that? That, you know, I don't have to get on call with six people.

Right. You know? And so for that, those two weeks, I interviewed the rest. And I didn't have to wonder, did I forget to tell them a thing? So they went over what I had already done. They're like, this is like the most comprehensive thing. And when I told them I did for a living, they were like, yeah, that sounds about right. You know?

And what I loved is. that because it was so comprehensive, there's a woman named Amy who was great, but she was like, you know, looking at this Tiffany and really diving deeper with you, you need someone who has a strong focus on people who own businesses. She's like, I have people who have businesses, but you have like four. So a number of people suggested this woman who wasn't on my list named Anjali. So she's like, the Financial Advisor's Financial Advisor. And I was like, huh, someone was like, you should speak to Anjali. And that's why I wrote her name down. And then like two more interviews later, hmm, you know what? I think Anjali might be a fit. I was like, you're the

third person that said that. And so then after I interviewed everyone and I kind of, for everybody, I kind of like had like a sheet for them so I could remember like, oh, I really like Amy's personality and I love that she was this. And so that way I could get clarity on like who, when I went back to look to see who I was going to choose. And I said, you know what? Let me add Anjali to the list. And I did and I interviewed them and they were 100% right. Not only was Anjali a CFP, a certified financial planner. She was a CPA, a certified public accountant. And so it was a And she specialized in people with high net worth people with businesses. Anjali's husband is a doctor with his own practice.

So a lot of her clients actually were doctors with their own practice or practices. So she was very familiar with the accounting side, the business side, the personal side. And so she was the perfect mix. So people will sometimes come to me and say, oh, I want to work with Anjali. I'm like, you don't have a business. Right. It wouldn't make sense. You'd be paying her all this money for the expertise she's not going to bring to the table

for that particular thing. Right. You know? Right. And so I was just like, you know, so it's been really great. Like, so I put that in the book. Like I'm like, here is your so-called financial life. This is literally my sheet.

That before you meet, here's a question to ask. So then you can fill them in for everybody that you meet. And then two, here's your so-called financial life. So you can share that ahead of time so they can qualify or disqualify themselves. And so that was really important to me. I wanted you to do the work that I did to help me get where I am. You know, that this is not just like, oh, it's not theoretical. It was like, here's the work that I actually did and the work of the people that I've helped along the way that actually work.

So you can do the step, do the work, do the step, read the step, do the work. And so, yeah, that's like one of my favorite parts. And I've been working with Anjali now for, like I said, like five years. And she's been amazing. In the beginning, we really focused heavily on me. And then maybe by year two, we've really got to the business side. And then she really became like part of the team. So I have my CFO, George A.

I have a CPA. J. Lee, her name is. And then I have Anjali and then I have my attorney, Tony. And so there was a time we were trying to decide whether the business should go from an S corp to a C corp. And this is like the tax entities for business. And so the five of us, these five brilliant women were on this call and everyone put in their expertise based upon, you know, Tony as the attorney was like, well, here's I'm seeing in this space, if it makes sense. You know, at the time I was with the CPA, Angie, was like, well, from the tax perspective, dot, dot, that.

Anjali was like, well, from the Tiffany personal perspective, if she does that, what would that look like for the amount of money she wants to make? Because I know what her goal is. Right. And the CFP, it was like, well, based upon the business is health, this would help. So it was so amazing. And I was like, look what happens when you have a financial team. Right. I no longer have to be worried about Jake the thief coming in anymore.

because I've got offers that come in and I bring it to Anjali and they will kick it around the table. And so they're going to catch the scam. Right. And there is one. And so not everyone's going to need all of that. It's just because I have my multiple businesses. Yeah. You might just need your accountability partner.

Right. You might need an accountability partner and a financial advisor or and an accountant. But what I implore is that no one does money alone. Right. You know what's beautiful about what you just described is they are all at the table together. You know, I've had experiences where, you know, I've had attorneys and I've had accountants, but I'm having individual one-on-one conversations with each of them. And so I'll talk to my accountant and I'll be like, yes, but my business attorney said this.

If you think of a hub and spoke model, right? You're the middle. Yeah, I'm the middle and then I'm like, literally speaking. I'm spoke to all of them. But what's so much more efficient and also gets better results, is putting everybody at the same table together for the same shared meeting. And ideally, that is the role of your financial advisor if you decide to get one. They are at the center.

That is your primary care provider. And they send you to specialists. Well, a good financial planner doesn't necessarily send you to a specialist. Instead, they will work with a specialist you already have. You know, because Angele doesn't upsell. Like, use this insurance. It's like, who's your insurance agent already? Right.

You know, I can base some suggestions, but if you already have them, you know, that's great. you know, I can talk to them. I'll forget sometimes because I'll say something. And she's like, well, I can just call Georgia and navigate that. I'm like, oh, that's right. I forgot you do that, you know? Or like when I was doing estate planning, Tony, my attorney, and I was doing a trust and a will. And she was asking me something.

And I was like, oh, I don't know. She's like, well, I'll just call Tony. I'm like, that's right. Right. I don't speak legally. You know? So I was like, oh, so I saw the email exchange back and forth. Hey, Tony, Tiffany, you know, like when it came to this part, I didn't see quite this.

And Tony's like, oh, no. in the new estate planning law. So they're going back and forth. And so it's just having a financial team, like I said, you might be listening and you might be like, I don't need all. You don't. You likely don't need all that I have. Right. But I promise you you're going to need something at the very least a your accountability partner.

Right. Excellent. Well, thank you for spending this time with us. Is there anything that I haven't asked about that you really want to emphasize? Well, I hope those listening, like who are needing help step by step when it comes to their money. November 21st, Made Whole, made available. It is a companion copy to get good with money. And it is for those who not only want to learn the work, but do the work alongside of the learning.

It's literally me, teacher Tiffany, sitting beside you, working through it with you, providing all the tools and resources you need for success. And it's available at made wholeworkbook.com. Beautiful. So, yeah. We will link to that in the show notes. Awesome. Absolutely. Oh, and final, final question. Do you know your protege in Get Smart with Money in our Netflix documentary? Do you have any updates on her? How is she doing? She's good. So when, so Ariana, what I love, not really love, but she, like, I think she like broke her ankle at some point afterward. And she was like she had run up her credit card bill again. And Ariana, if you watch the show, she was really down on herself.

Right. And I remember talking to her after that. she was like, I rented my credit card, but that's okay, because this was never her language. She said, that's okay because I had this debt paydown plan and I'm going to automate it. And I'm like, and I was like, oh, my goodness. I wasn't so worried about like the debt. It was she had shifted. She realized that that financial setback, it's like, like everything was she was bad, not the thing itself. The shame, right?

Yes. Because she couldn't fix it before. Right. Because all she saw was. I'm a bad mom. I'm a bad wife. I'm a bad with my money. I'm a bad.

Because her money told her that she felt that like I'm bad as a result of the mistakes that I've made. Like I'm a mistake, not this is a mistake. Right. Exactly. So when she said like, no, you know, so one, because she could see solutions now, her side hustle really became starting to make more than her main job. So she's that really picked up. Oh, that's beautiful.

I know. Nice. Yes. And then she was also like, you know, so by this time I should be debt free again because this is what I have in place. I almost wept happy tears because I was like, oh my gosh, she's got it. Because I told her, I said, Ariana, and now that you have that, that stays with you forever, there's always going to be something that happens.

There's always going to be mistakes and slip-ups. But that mindset shift means that you will always be able to return back home. Right. You know, to a safe space where you'll be okay. And so, like, yeah, it's been a little while so I spoken to her last, but that's where she was. And I just am so proud of her. That's beautiful. That's beautiful.

How about Lindsay? Oh, Lindsay's doing super well. So Lindsay got her biggest art commission ever. She got to design a billboard. Wow. So there's this big billboard right over Austin, Texas, where she did all the art. She did all the design. And the billboard went up the same weekend of her 10-year high school reunion.

Oh, my gosh. So she got to go to her high school reunion and be like, that's me. That's what I did. I love that. I love it. I'm so proud of her. What a go-getter. Yeah.

Yeah, I love that. Hopefully, Netflix, hint, hint. Yeah. Netflix, we need a follow-up. Exactly. Yes. You know, a lot of people have thought that it was a series. I don't know why it wasn't.

Because I keep hearing that from people over and over. They were like, that was a movie? I thought it was a series. I mean, honestly, people, it would be great to have the update of who we helped and then the new people that we were helping. Yeah, exactly. And I did a really good job with the mix. Yeah.

Because oftentimes, you know, you see these things. You're like, I don't see myself. Right. You know, they had a great mix of the different financial educators and advisors, which I thought was great. But they also had a great mix of the financial challenges. Exactly. Exactly.

Right. Yeah. So it was perfect. Yeah. Hit, hit Netflix. Let's do it again. Yes. Awesome.

Well, thank you so much for coming on the show. Thank you for having me. Thank you, Tiffany. What key takeaways did we get from this? conversation here are three number one in order to manage money well for the rest of our lives we need to learn how to work through shame shame plays a huge role in our financial decisions and if we don't deal with it then this can be the reason that we're unable to improve our financial situation our focus stays on the shame

of getting into and being in a tough situation to begin with, our focus stays in the past, rather than where it belongs, which is in the present, where we focus on finding ways out of the situation. So if we can release shame, then we're able to focus on the present, which is where we are most constructive. One of the things I learned through therapy is that the only way to release shame is to give voice to it. You have to tell someone. The therapist, your mom, your dad, someone who is not going to judge you, who's going to give you a safe space to land. And so for me, it was my best friend Linda. Because shame loves silence. Yeah. You know, it's like, don't say anything. Stay here with me, you know? Right. So shame is like the Disney villain. Nobody's going to understand.

Everyone's going to think like what a fool you are. Look at you. look at you, look at you. And the moment you tell someone that cares about you and they're like, is that all? You're all of a sudden you're like, is it all? Is it as big as I've made it feel? Learning how to work through shame is part of learning how to improve our financial lives. That is the first of three key takeaways. Key takeaway number two, we need to reframe our financial setbacks.

Financial setbacks happen to everyone. They can be demoralizing to the point where it could keep someone from continuing to work on making financial progress. But they don't have to be. Setbacks don't have to be demoralizing. Setbacks can simply help you realize how to better empower yourself. And you can do that with a simple mindset shift. I had a friend of mine who she had saved and saved and saved and she was really happy because she wanted to buy a house or a car or something. and then something broke down in her life, you know,

and she had to address it with the money she'd saved in her emergency savings. Her initial reaction was like, oh, this always happens. Like, what's the point? And I was like, well, I know you here, once again, I have like an emergency. What I hear is, oh, my gosh,

I actually have emergency savings for an emergency. How awesome is that? Right. And she was like, wait, I didn't think about it. I'm like, because I said before you would have the emergency without the savings. Right. And she was like, right.

I was like, you know, like how awesome is that that like you actually can address the emergency without disrupting the rest of your financial life? Finally, key takeaway number three. There are some rules around side hustles. You know, side hustles are a hot topic because who doesn't want extra money? Extra income is fantastic. But figuring out the right side hustle for you, that can be an incredible. challenge and picking the wrong side hustle can become an enormous waste of time and energy. Tiffany

talks through a few things that you should remember when you're trying to figure out your ideal side hustle. Ideally, you want to look for a side hustle that either you have a certificate or a degree in like the subject matter that you're, that you're going to be side hustling. That's already your expertise. Yes, right? Or something that you're already doing. So for example, when I, used to tutor, I could charge more because I was already a teacher and I had my master's in education. So if everybody else is getting paid $25 an hour, I could demand 50. Because they're like, well, you have your master's in education. So yes. So it allows you to charge more. And then the second rule is, ideally something that you're currently doing, something similar. So when I tutored or

babysat, I didn't have to learn a new skill set. Right. You know, remember, sideholds. The purpose of a side puzzle is just strictly to make money. It's not like, you know, this is not your passion for life, you know. So for me, it meant that I didn't have to, after work, also think about now I have to learn how to bake cakes. So those are three key takeaways from this conversation with the budget nista, Tiffany Aliche. Thank you so much for tuning in. If you enjoyed this episode, please share it with a friend or a family member. That is the single most important thing that you can do to spread the message of having great financial health. You can also subscribe to the show notes at afford anything.com slash show notes. You'll get a synopsis of every episode.

Plus, for the Ask Paula and Joe episodes, you'll get the timestamps of every question. So it's a great resource to have that text read at your fingertips. You can get that for free by going to afford anything.com slash show notes and signing up there. Finally, make sure that you are following us on your favorite podcast playing app. And while you're there, please leave us a review. Thank you again for tuning in. My name is Paula Pant. This is the Afford Anything podcast, and I will catch you in the next episode.