All Fantasy Everything - Boat Names (w/ Zak Toscani, Sean Jordan, David Gborie)

Episode Date: February 3, 2022

Toot toot, all aboard you salty little biscuits.    Episode Guest: Zak Toscani @zak_toscani IG: @zaktoscani   Support the show! Join the All Fantasy Everything Patreon for ad-free episodes, mailbags, and video pre-rolls. Check it all out at www.patreon.com/AllFantasy.    Follow the Good Vibes Gang on social media: Ian Karmel @IanKarmel IG: @IanKarmel Sean Jordan @SeanSJordan IG: @SeancougarmelonJordan David Gborie IG: @Coolguyjokes87See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

This is a HeadGum Podcast. This is All Fantasy Everything, the podcast where we fantasy draft anything and everything from the world of pop culture. On today's episode, we're drafting boat names. Our guest today is friend of the podcast and stand-up comedian, Zach Toscani. This is Zach's 29th appearance on All Fantasy Everything. I believe that's a record.

I'm your host, Ian Carmel, and I'm joined, as always, by my friends and comedians, Sean Jordan and David Borey. Let's get into it. welcome to another brand new episode of all fantasy everything the podcast that we're just getting we're fucking taking off you know what i mean we're taking off on the runway people other people are talking we're all having a conversation and i'm starting the podcast in the middle of it we're fucking birdman baby flying anywhere i like it pans warm put the bacon in somebody people have been saying that sean jordan did a great job hosting last week is that a great job he did a great job yeah i was uh i was like snapping a rubber band in my thigh the whole time just to inflict pain because you weren't here and I don't want to get used to it. He was inverted.

You were hurting. I was sweating a little bit. I was pitting out and winking all the time. I was fucked up. I had a bad time. My pants have tons of weird sweat that's poop hey there's a bunch of weird sweat in the toilet there's brown it looks like somebody really sweat in the toilet. I got sweat all over my underwear. I don't know.

I've never seen it before. It smells like poop. I swear to God. What happens? What do you do when there's corn in your sweat? I mean, I know a lot about sweating when I listen to corn. That's pretty good. Now, Zach, you were talking about taco bell yeah taco bells are yeah yeah so i went to taco bell uh like two nights ago and went through ordered everything seemed to be a pleasant experience i get home i was in a needless to say

there's been a lot of personal shit going on so i kind of needed this meal to be on point yeah not there you know and then i get and i open the bag and it's a completely different order completely like that's that's one place you don't want to get a different order oh no were there any nice surprises at least no it's so personal i didn't even want to open it it's like i don't want to know i'm like yeah i'll take it it's so personal. I didn't even want to open it. It's like, I don't want to know. Like at Wendy's, I'm like, yeah, I'll take it. It's like an internet or a computer at the library and someone left the browser up. It's like, no, I can't.

Was it one of those weird where it's like, it's cinnamon twists and one bean burrito or like something like that? Like some shit order? Well, I like cinnamon the twist, but it was mostly like, I mostly go taco and quesadilla. And it was a lot of like burritos or like bean and cheese rollers.

So I was like, I don't even, I don't. What do you do? I don't paint with those brushes. So usually I would just. You just slipped that in there. So usually I would be, I like would just get depressed and throw it away and then just try to do something else or eat ice cream. That's so sad.

Yeah. But this time I was like, fucking boundaries, dude. I'm not going to take it anymore. So I drove back. I drove back and I was very polite. I was like, you know, the whole time I was like, not this time, dude, I'm standing up for myself. And then I get there.

I'm like, oh, excuse me. Yeah yeah i know i you got a wrong order and i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm here i'm sorry i don't want anything just let me go but yeah he exchanged it and shit and i was like oh wow i had i think that was the first time i've ever done that like gone bad yeah anyway i don't know what it means you're gonna start you're gonna start returning all kinds of shit oh yeah i'm gonna be one of those people dude one of the reward is like taco bell that's like a good that's a good way to enforce that behavior because you're like well the last time i did this i got the taco bell i wanted so what else can i get out of life that i want exactly hello hello bank what's up motherfuckers uh i believe you guys overdrafted our charge me for the last 28 years of my life and i'd like to i'd like to have a conversation with you about that

you mean to tell me i can have uh an account at the hsbc blank bank the historic black college bank oh hbcu can i tell you guys the other day i got so stoned i started looking up swiss bank accounts just like to see what it would take yeah well what does it take 10 000 pounds oh euros i mean i think or whatever the currency is they're swiss francs right they're not euros i think it's whatever it was i think it was whatever i didn't know the symbol right you need 10 000 of them i think it's higher than the euro i think that's what's that's what's money is oh swiss is franken swiss frank account dude

swiss frank down at the subway he keeps my subs hardy it ran out of steam at the end hardy inhale dude yeah it's a hardy inhale subman i have uh i have some residge throat clearing i think from the covet uh covet 19 the street the street buyer is known as covet 19 i keep clearing my throat like i'm gonna say something so i'm sorry if it sounds like i really want to get in there i need you to say some shit every time you clear your throat go on you tell. You show me a plane that can cut steel at a perfect right angle like that. Yeah, I haven't seen one yet.

I'm not saying it doesn't exist. I'd like to see it. They would have you believe. They are going to have you believe that it happened to you, Bill. Sean, I'll tell you. I work in construction. You can exist. You can be doing that out here.

It's real. It's real. It's real. Go for it. Quick shout out. Our topic today, which we'll get to much later, suggested by John Mack. Shout out to you, John Mack, at J2TheMack, M-A-K, on Twitter.

Great idea. You should be at return of the mac if you're not dude yeah i mean that must that must have gotten snapped up pretty with the ck you think i don't know he doesn't he's dressed with a k m-a-k oh yeah i bet that's the man i love that song it's returning one of the best songs it's crazy it always makes me feel 10 feet tall yeah every time the little ad libs oh yeah you gotta do that like the next time that you go get a new cell phone wherever it's like a tense i get real weird when i go to get like a new phone or got to go to the mechanic.

I want to put those little drops in next time I go. I'll have the new iPhone. Yes, I do. You know how many times I've been sad listening to that song, wishing the girl I was sad about could see me listening to return of the Mac. It's the return of the Mac.

I'm back. Like I'm doing spins in my apartment. She needs to see this. If she saw this, she would be so sad. Yes, she would. Yes, I did. I'll miss her. I'll miss her.

He's British, right? Mark Morrison? He must be. I think he's British. He is not. Is not isn't yeah that's not a song by an american man no way oh man that's dope and the video's all euro have you seen the video it's hella european yeah i've seen the video but i've never seen the video if you know what i mean i've never i've seen that video a thousand times probably but i've never like studied the video you should have like an espn show where like yeah you and john gruden sit down and bring music i bet you john gruden has seen the shit out of that video oh yeah he has

i remember studying gin and juice when he when dre like pops out all the jimmies and I'm like no way no way Snoop's going in there and gonna fuck like 15 times there's no way that's gonna happen and I was like a sixth grader just being like taking everything so literally because you would had sex you would compared it to your sex life and you were like Snoop also didn't need all that hockey jersey. It was a time of excess. Closer bag. You had too many condoms.

You know, I have that. I have a replica of that hockey jersey. You know that. I do know that. Yeah, yeah. Never been worn. Next Portland live show. Yeah, you should wear it when you go on tour.

I'll wear that until I take it off and throw it into the crowd. You should ride a bike. You should ride... Like a handlebar. You know what I mean? Like a Snoop Dogg bike. I do know what you mean. Sean Jordan is here. Sean is Jordan on Twitter twitter sean cougar melon jordan on instagram you can you can find

him right on there a lot of those set your watch to it my friend a lot of those sean getting a little too comfortable hosting this podcast i said i was snapping a rubber band on my thigh man i was what i hear every time what i hear some i get somebody added us on twitter saying of course i miss ian but boy it was really good to hear sean hosting that podcast and i'm like what what the fuck what the fuck do i do now how do i handle it felt like he came into his own yeah it was like watching a coming of age movie when bolivia wants to give you their highest honor you go so i understand i had to i had to step in you got to do what you got to do highest honor you go so i understand i had to i had to step in you got to do what you got to do

i'll tell you where i was i was in jew york city celebrating the release of my jewess's book anatomy a love story which was named to the jew york times bestseller list number one number one amazing number one amazing that's that's the super bowl right that is number one jew york times bestselling author, Dana Schwartz. Are you walking around the house like, and another one? Yeah. Yeah.

I'm bringing it up a lot. I'm bringing it up in public. I always tell people that I was a Newark Times bestseller. That's a good one too. Hey, people in New Jersey read too. They do read. They read different,

but they read. It's like you, Bruce Springsteen's autobiography, an old issue of Slam Magazine. The sign in front of the Bada Bing. They read that. They're like, oh, it's Bada Bing still. Bon Jovi's autobiography. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Bon Jovi. Oh, these two people are looking at the apartment in front of me right now. No, my neighbor moved, and now these two people are looking at the apartment in front of me right now no these two my neighbor moved and now these two people are waiting to see the apartment and they're just looking at me case them out go out there with those shirt on be like okay you guys got my email i send it to strangers so i'll run out there and be like what would you name your wi-fi put them on the spot i'm thinking about moving them wouldn't that be funny yeah you're allowed like a welcome to the neighborhood welcome to death row your neighbor was cool as hell yeah he was cool so it's a oh my neighborhood yeah it is cool too i'm very cool sorry go ahead sean real quick coming up i have some shows uh on february 18th and 19th i will be at the comedy corner underground in minneapolis minnesota one of the best cities in the whole world i'm thrilled about it on the 20th and 19th, I will be at the Comedy Corner Underground in Minneapolis, Minnesota,

one of the best cities in the whole world. I'm thrilled about it. On the 20th, I'm actually doing a show in Rochester, Minnesota, just down the way. Undetermined location, but the show is happening. We're just trying to find the venue. All the details will be on my Twitter, Instagram, and all that, so just go check it out.

February 25th, I will be in Sioux Falls, South Dakota at Boss's Comedy Club. We'll actually be in Tee, South Dakota Which is like a mile Down the road So get down there And check it out

And on the 26th I'm going to be in Denver, Colorado At the Bug Theater I'm thrilled about it I'm going to be doing The Grawlix Show So definitely come check

One of those shows out If you can Wow Come to those shows I'm I Yeah I'm excited to be doing

Stand Up Again I probably won't be able To make it But I really do hope Some of our listeners go Yeah I cannot be there I gotta work Yeah come to those shows i'm i uh yeah i'm excited to be doing stand-up i probably won't be able to make it but i really do hope some of our listeners go yeah i cannot be there i gotta work yeah i'm gonna find a reason to come to la man we're going suit shopping fucking come down oh yeah or i'll come up there and we'll go suit shopping either way i just want to come i just want to i just want to come barf in your toilet again come down next weekend i gotta i gotta be like dana i saw this number one and i'll just lay the trivial pursuit board out yeah uh you know gotta be like, Dana, I saw this number one

and I'll just lay the trivial pursuit board out. Let's figure it out. Let's do it. Let's get to the bottom of this. Sean, come to LA while I'm in LA. I'm here until the end of March. And also, my birthday party, my birthday's in two weekends. I'm gonna have a little

picnic B-day. In two weeks? What day? Sunday? February 12th. Saturday. God damn it. I'll be gone.

You know what's good on a picnic is a little baba ganoush. Oh, I love a baba ganoush. What is a baba ganoush? It's like a, I think it's like an eggplant. It's a roast eggplant. It's a roast eggplant dip. Delicious. Outside, it's hot.

Yeah. Park day is wonderful little pellegrino maybe sparkling anything could happen oh yeah i'm making it last time i'm making it yeah go on oh last time i was at a park i saw a woman burning her mail you see all kinds of stuff you gotta get out there amongst the people yeah the people yeah i like what she's doing whatever it is it seems off the grid and i like it yeah i can't burn this at home i'm gonna go to the park i can't burn this at home oh and if you're wondering she did collect the ashes into a bag and then take them with her. What does she gotta hide? What came in the mail? Can they recreate your mail from ashes? Because if so...

You want to find out? Can they them recreate your mail from ashes? I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I apologize. Please forget me. I think somebody just rode by with a dirt bike on the street

my block is going nuts do you live in a dmx video now i guess so shout out to logan street south south logan a dirt bike on in a neighborhood made me think of philadelphia and somebody recently told us that we drank i drank i drank at least seven city-wides when we were in philadelphia and somebody told you that you didn't know that that was what happened i mean i knew that there was a number i didn't know i would put it at seven yeah are you serious half of seven karaoke that's how drunk we got i could drink seven of those those i was wearing a yarmulke sean what do you think happened we all oh we're giving we all had that on we were doing we were moving different then too that's not that's not 2022 us no that is i told you guys way after the fact but i was like coughing up blood after it was pre-prando behavior

you know what i mean pre-pando big time there was a there was a hotel room bought at four in the morning there was a lot going on this is gonna be different still great still and i go back to our room at like three and we're just like yeah we'll get some sleep we both i think we had to get up at four we're like it's fine an hour and we're good it was oh we need we need a tour manager we need to be managed this tour will have more hotel rooms and fewer, less alcohol, I think. And we just need to be manning. Maybe we'll have some merch. Maybe we'll have merch.

Thankfully, I'm through this stage, I think. But I was still back in the, maybe if I fly into a city like Omaha and then get a ride from Omaha to Sioux Falls, that'll save me like 50 bucks, which it did. But after that Philly show, I flew to Omaha and then had to get in a car and drive another three hours to get home to save $50. And that's like, oh, it was a bummer. Yeah, it's where you start to realize, like, maybe three hours of my time is worth $50. It is.

That time, specifically that time. Yes. I would have loved to have been sleeping. Could have used the sleep. David Borey is here. Hey. Who got Joke 77 on Instagram? It's me.

He's not on Twitter twitter you jamokes you blew it you blew it you blew it there's a limited time shakes yeah it was like cranberry sprite you could get it for a minute and it's gone even though it's delicious which is funny because lately i've been writing things that are only tweets like i've been writing things that aren't jokes but i don't want to go back to twitter people gotta come see your life like your live tweets dude that's fine oh yeah it's just gonna be me saying i got an acura i'm gonna be all right that's your show is it poetry yeah i don't know it's it's just me yelling shit quick audience poll where do i go to lunch today stuff like that yeah yeah yeah yeah i mean in

better stuff i do not miss that time in comedy where people would just honestly go to an open mic and then flip open their phone and then just read their tweets oh my god you know what was the worst about la hey i got a roast coming up oh god i want to make fun of someone who's not here imagine this guy is uh yeah like what the foot no imagine this guy is somebody that you don't know. It was always so funny. Imagine your next comedian has one Honduran parent and one parent from England. And they're 5'4".

And I'm going to be a real prick to them. But they're not here. But be cool about it. Yeah. Shout out to LA comedy. Oh, you guys can come see me though you can come see me february 18th uh faded comedy denver going down we're at the skylark baby we're upstairs headliner cypher sounds shit's gonna be amazing march 17th through 19th i'm gonna be at the laugh shop in calgary alberta that's a dope spot is it oh it's really cool hotel is in the venue so you can walk from your hotel

room to the spot that is all i've ever wanted oh and there's a mall in walking distance say no more oh my god i'm going april 7th april yeah sean might be there and maybe clara kane that would be crazy if that works out april 7th through 9th i'm gonna be at the grove comedy club in lowell arkansas june 10th and 11th riot comedy club in houston texas and for some reason i have it on the books already j July 12th through 16th. Rumors Comedy Club in Winnipeg, Manitoba. Also, Michigan. I might be coming for you in April, but it's still rumors. You're going to go take their guns, aren't you?

I'm going to take your guns and your jobs. How about that? My mom's an immigrant. I don't give a shit about you. Give me that fucking job. It's fucking common. Zach Toscani is here at Zach underscore Toscani. That's right.

That's Zach with a K. You fucking mongrels. Oh, please. And then at Zach Toscani without the underscore on Instagram. Zach, how are you, baby? I'm doing good. I'm doing good i'm doing good going through a lot of going through a lot of things feeling good though you know uh i i miss seeing

you guys uh i've had like really wonderful conversations with i think each of you separately so now it's great we're all together again yeah this is wonderful yeah it is it really is it's like eating taco I miss you to pieces. I haven't been to Taco Bell in such a long time because I just feel like it's what's the point in going if I can't go with you guys? Yeah, me either. And I live by one. Yeah, dude. I live near a Del Taco and a Roost and I haven't been to either one because I miss you guys

so much. You're meeting like new dads and they're like, so man, you want to like go to Taco Bell? And you're like, ah, sorry, man. He pulls out a crumpled picture of us I just like I just like don't know if I'm ready if that's okay he asked me hey you want to go to Taco Bell and I pulled

out that crumpled picture and then I choke slam him against the wall and I'm kind of crying and I go I want to go with them I want to go with them okay you have to be Ian and here's your order. Go have kind of a tone with that guy. Go have kind of a tone.

Will you put a G in front of your last name when you sign your debit card receipt, please? Hey, I have credit cards now steven grobbinson now the g is silent you idiot here's to you mr grobbinson steven grobbinson my speedboat steve grobbinson could you imagine saying my name is steven grobbinson the g is silent and you're like why well, why would you? Why did you open like this, you fucking asshole? Steven Grabensohn?

And then you're like, no, the other G is silent, you moron. This always happens. It's spelled G-G-R-O-B-I-S-O-N, but the first G is silent. A buddy of mine would order, when they ask you what your name is, know for an order he would say ralph with two h's it just always it's so funny to think about somebody being like ralph i don't want to sound like a weirdo but is ralph short for something or is that the whole name ralph onda rafael ralph onda randolph is that what we go for randolph ralph doesn't seem like a whole name right no ralph ralph defer it's like ben where you're like i know there's something at the back it's one of those tophers it's short it's short for uh it's let's clear this up right now there is no tofer you're chris yeah nobody's nobody ever let that

nobody ever made that shit work oh i'm nobody's tofer shut the fuck up damn david it's true it's true it's like making up your own nickname because nobody nobody opted to call you tofer you started that you fucking started that. You fucking started that. Because you didn't want to be Chris. The first Topher I met was somebody that a girl I liked was a guy she liked. And that's a fucking Topher. That's a fucking Topher. It's a terrible way to be introduced to a name where you're like, don't like it.

There was no hope. That guy could have been named Ian and I would have hated it. Awful name, Topher. Aw tofer awful yeah it's terrible it's really bad chris you can go chris is there's a there's dignity in the name chris anyway so my first pick for the boat's draft is toper no no i blew it up zach do you have any dates coming up i do not i'm taking her easy for a little bit but you know you know hey if if you're taking her easy take her twice you know oh yeah dude i'm taking it taking her easy for all those sinners out in the world but uh my man you know watch the space who knows dates could be appearing at any moment but you know i like that. Watch the space. Can people exchange

money, perhaps, for some of your content? Oh, that's true. I do have a half hour of comedy. I think it's like 27 minutes. It's pay whatever you want. You can just DM me on Instagram or Twitter. All my DMs are open.

I also have, you know, there's a whole shrimp fried rice thing so there's been updates to that if you want those you can dm me to pay whatever you want uh yeah thank you for bringing that up i didn't i totally that's why you're a professional that's why i'm a jew the shrimp fried rice thing i remember when people came at you for a minute in the beginning and they're like he made it up and was like, then he's a genius. Right, right. I should be so lucky to know somebody who made that up.

And then Jensen Karp tried to take my shit and look what happened. That one went bad. It did go bad. Yeah. That one went south. When going viral goes bad. That's right. My name is Ian Carmel. At Ian Carmel on Twitter, at Ian Carmel on Instagram, at Ian Carmel on Proud of His Fiance on the Jewish New York Times app.

There it is. There it is. If you change that to your name, Proud of My Fiance. I'll change my Twitter name to Proud of My Fiance right now. Propers to you on that action figure my friend that is dope you have it right wait wait let me see this dude whoa i told laura about that she her eyes that's a good idea damn i'm out here i'm not gonna make her moves that's like one of the best gifts i've ever even heard of yeah that's really next level.

It was supposed to come out the day the book launched, and then it was later than... Well, I was hoping it would be here. The guy was perfect and delivered it and got it here so quick and was amazing. Shout out to Dano Bonanno Toys. So shout out to him. But it didn't get here in time for her book launch, but it did show up the day she was named

number one New York Times bestseller. So it looked like I timed it perfectly. It didn't. But it looked like it. That's all that matters. Yeah. I have nothing to comment. Watch the Late Late Show with James Corden. Watch Where I Am the Sidekick. Listen to All Fantasy Everything.

Watch Sex Unzipped on Netflix. And another show that I am going to be a part of is getting closer to reality so hopefully there'll be an announcement soon and you'll be able to see me even more on your televisions and handheld devices hmm I like that

yeah I also have another television show that you guys will see me on oh 60 days in I also have another television show that you guys will see me on. Oh. 60 Days In? Yeah. David and I are doing an American reboot of All Creatures Great and Small, where we play two bumbling veterinarians in the English countryside.

Also, RB's the musical. We're also on that. Yeah. And you guys are going to hire me as the key grip, you promised. Yeah? We said best boy grip. Best boy. Yeah, okay, I'll be the best boy.

Oh, my gosh, thank you. Don't start fucking talking like you could be a key grip, dude. I'll be the best boy. I love you. Can I work my way? Key grip is familial. It's like my family's family's family. Yeah.

I just want something important to be happening, and then I'm going to stop in the middle and be like, I'm taking my 15. So I want to do that on a set. Three more minutes, and we push into penalty. Yeah, I'm taking it. I don't give a fuck if you can't cry yet. I'm taking it.

My 15 is now. And that lunch is a Marlboro Red. Marlboro Red, not quite far enough away from the building. Yeah. Oh, man. marlboro red not quite not quite far enough away from the building yeah oh man this real this is just well it's not even funny never mind never mind what you have to say you have to do it it just popped into my head but it really doesn't have to do with anything okay so we're doing a show last night adam posse was uh he like rented a theater so he could go over his um half hour that he's doing we should talk about adam yeah go on we should take this opportunity to let people know uh we wanted to get him on the podcast i don't know that we will in time hold on you keep telling the story and i'll have the dates after

this he uh so we're he was doing a dry run of this show and the guy who booked him at like whose theater it was it was just a little tense situation because the other the other show went long and da da da and the guy was going through with adam how to clean up the space and adam goes i know like whose theater it was. It was just a little tense situation because the other show went long and da-da-da. And the guy was going through with Adam how to clean up the space. And Adam goes, I know how to be clean. It was just the way that he said it. I was like, yeah, you're upset with this dude.

I can tell. Amazing. He's so dope, man. Anyway, where are we going? Adam Posse's great. Shout out. Shout out. He is practicing this album recording

in Portland, Oregon at the Shoebox Theater. Yeah. Doors are at 9 30 five dollar admission now you're too late for the january 27th show that's on you that's on us but february 10th february 17th february 24th and march 10th you can get tickets now adam posse he is a extraordinary stand-up comedian. Go see that guy. He's incredible. Also, that man can put... At one time, I'm pretty sure he drank 20 beers and I drank 10. But we got to the bottom of a 30 rack on my porch one time. He accidentally drank airplane fuel once.

Really? Yeah, he used to have a story about it because it's like a gel and it hit him in the mouth and he just like fucking ate it. He used to fuel a plane. I remember being out with him and he'd be like, I got to go to the airport and put fuel in planes. And I'm like, what? Yeah.

I had a plane fueling buddy too. Is that a common job? I think it's probably a pretty decent one. Yeah, I'm sure. I don't think I could work at the airport. Those shows that posse is doing her fun and i'm guessing i'm i'll probably do a couple more yeah i'm trying to yeah also shout out to my esthetician sophia my skin is banging it is good it's great you've got that dramatic

light with the blinds too yeah you look like you're in hitchcock movie or something yeah it's a shame they got me on a cartoon. I can say it. There's a cartoon. There's a lot of cartoons. There's a lot of cartoons. You're in Disney's Fantasia? Maybe there's a cartoon coming out that I'm going to be on every single episode of. We'll see. They're making a new Simpsons,

but you're going to be Fart Simpson, aren't you? That was a long walk. That would be wild if David was the new voice of Homer or something. Joe! I got it. I got it. I got it in the bag.

I fucking nailed it. I got it in the bag. I like the Fart Simpson thing. I think. No. It was awful. It was awful. I think I'm going back to it.

Don't go back to it. We all agree that the friends to move on. I'll probably go back a couple more times. Don't do it anymore. back to it we have at least an hour and 11 minutes left of this and i'm going to go i love the tone in your voice i actually like that i don't think marissa liked it one bit i doubt it i might call my daughter fartart Simpson if she poops later. You know, I'll be like, let's go, Fart Simpson. I don't think Laura's going to like that. I don't think Laura will like it either. It would be funnier if you called her Shart Simpson,

but Fart Simpson doesn't make sense. That's the most we call in the biz, punch up. Yeah, you know, hey, I'm available. Send me your scripts. I don't care for it. I like the Fart Simpson more. I know. I heard that you did.

I heard that you liked that. Actually, you know what? Can I say something? Sure. Coming around. I like the Fart Simpson more. I know. I heard that you did. I heard that you liked that. Actually, you know what? Can I say something? Coming around. I like Fart Simpson. It's pretty funny. David, I need you to hear that I hear what you're saying, but for me, honestly, if I need to speak my truth, it's Fart Simpson for me.

It's Fart Simpson. And I'm on board that train too. I'm still out. If someone gives you a big bowl of beans you know what am i what am i fart simpson over here that's a nice scenario you could say that wow yeah i understand here's another let me paint another picture for you you're in the car you're you're driving past uh you're driving past the paper mill uh-huh you know in albany oregon and uh you're driving past it and it smells like fart and it's not but you're like hey what are they making in that factory who works there fart simpson fart and it's not. But you're like, hey, what are they making in that factory? Who works there?

Fart Simpson. Yeah. I got another one for you. You're on a crowded airplane. I do not like this bit. It starts to smell a little bit like somebody tooted. And you look around and you're like, oh, I didn't know there was a celebrity on the plane. You guys see Fart Simpson up there?

Yeah, that's a good one. In first class? Yeah. You're like pulling the seat of the person in front of you. Hey, that's F Bart Simpson up there. Let's say you're on that same airplane earlier, earlier on the flight. And you sit down. And this is a, it's a 737.

And it's been in service since, I'm going to say, 2004. So it's not new. It's not old. But it's got some miles on it. You sit down in your seat. And it makes a little creak noise. It goes kind of a creak. And you don't, when he said it,

and, you look around and you say, Hey, who's, who's, who's flying this thing? Fart Simpson, you know,

sure. Let's say you're in a major league baseball game and, uh, somebody hits a dinger. The baseball player hits a home run and then they, uh, they toot while they do that. And you're like,

Oh my gosh, check it out. It's fart and Homer Simpson down there. Still not father son i might be dead i might be dead or those are his testicles fart and homer simpson so there's a pretty big shipment of sorghum coming down the columbia river right sorghum and you're on the tugboat pushing uh container thing of sorghum down the Columbia River. And your first mate, he rips a pretty big stinker. He rips a pretty big stinker while he's stepping onto the container ship holding the sorghum. And you say, well, you look at that.

It's Fart and Barge Simpson. And you transitioned into boats. You're a champion, my friend. You transitioned. We're in the boating world now. It feels like this is like an aristocrats bit. Yeah. Except if the aristocrats started paying off and was funny from step one.

That's true. Yeah, I did watch that. When I watched that movie, I it like right when i started doing comedy and i thought it was cool now i've been doing comedy for like 12 years and i'm like that's dumb yeah i'm with you on that i definitely had my version because i watched it like right when i started comedy yeah me too it's like right around when it came out right like oh nine ten but like yeah now that i've been doing it for a while i'm like that i would never do that no it's just like not if i did it would be i mean i just wouldn't leave if they were like say the

gnarliest stuff you can think of i'd be like okay but it ain't gonna be funny i am from the patrice o'neill school of bombing though where it's like if'm bombing, we're all bombing. Everybody's getting shot. Everyone's getting farted in this fuselage. Fart Simpson, dude. That's funny. Who's telling these jokes? Fart Simpson?

And then they get a huge standing ovation. Now we are gathered here today not to, although we could, talk about how funny it is to say Fart Simpson, which is pretty funny. It'd be very funny if that was David's character. But to draft boat names. Names that we would give a boat if we had a boat.

In fact, five names, we would give five boats each. Now, the way we determine the order of the draft is through a rollicking game of rock, paper, scissors. Play between the three of you, and we throw on shoot. All right, here we go. Rock, paper, scissors, shoot. Oh, Sean wins. Sean Jordan. A natural, too.

A scissors versus two paper. Sean Jordan as the winner of rock, paper, scissors. And it's incumbent upon you to determine the order of today's draft. But before you do that, I will remind you, it is a serpentine draft. And what is that? That's a great question. Well, David, it's like if you're hiking, but it's too steep just to go straight up. So what they have are they have switchbacks so what you do

is you walk up and to the right a little bit and then there's just a tiny little like flat area gives you a little breather and then uh so you just you you go from left to right then you go up a little bit and then you go from right to left and then there's another we're switching back yeah and like you know sometimes it's a good place if you gotta fart. I was trying to do the return of the Mac and it didn't work out.

Where's my Mac? Where's my Mac? Once again. One thing about hiking, if you ever need to like fart or anything, it's a good place to do it like right at the switchback part.

So then you just go up and you know, so it's just kind of like back and forth all the way to the top uh basically what it means is you pick fourth in the first round you pick first in the second round sean with that in mind what will the order of today's draft be it's it's tough because i do not think i will have the best list i don't think anybody's gonna take anybody's shit though today i don't either but i have to decide if i want to go first because it'll be because i don't want to go after you boys because i think you're really gonna do great um i think you're gonna do great yeah i appreciate it and i but oh i'm not this isn't see what i tell you about that uh it's not a self-deprecating thing i'll go first i. I'll do it. Fuck it. Sean, stop lying about your big break.

And then Zach. Ooh. And then David. And then Ian. Sean, Zach. David, Ian. Hot corner. I'm already nervous.

I'm nervous. I haven't been nervous in a while. Pop the world. Whoa! Come on Oh yeah Now I got the flow And now I bought my boat Now I bought my name, my boat

Let me get a Big Mac Would you like fries with that? Yes I would I'm about to name my boats. Let me get a big Mac. Would you like fries with that? Yes, I would. You know I would. You just get out of your car right up to the speaker. Yes, I would. Yes, I would. If I saw someone doing that, I feel like it would spark me to be doing whatever I do in my life.

If anybody is ever doing anything more Turn of the Mac themed IRL, I do in my life. If anybody is ever doing anything Return of the Mac themed IRL, I'm in. That's touching the monolith. It makes me feel so good. Shout out to Sam Jay's show where they sang Return of the Mac. Yes, I did. Also watch Sam Jay's new show,

The Bus Down. You might hear a little cameo from your boy one episode what is the bus down it's uh sam jack and langston and chris red show what do they do on there what is it what kind of show is it they work at a casino it's very funny freddie gibbs is in it yeah it's very funny i bet it's hilarious oh yeah that's gonna be tight dude i still remember when we were writing the pilot and first time i ever met jack i'd never said a word to him he walked up and he just looks at me he's like that's how you dress and he walked away i was just i was like whoa yeah i'm an old i'm old man and then he later he i told him that story

and he's like he's like dude i'm i don't know why i said that i was like it's hilarious but it was very very very funny that wasn't how you dressed how you dressed. There was no value judgment. No, I've seen you do that several times. I've seen you be like, that's fashion? I was like, no, man, no. I've seen Jack in some clothes where you could say, that's how you dress? I've seen it. Here's the thing.

You know what I mean? Sometimes the explorer gets lost in the woods, and he's an explorer. Oh, yeah. He finds his way out, but I love it. Yeah. Impeccable dresser, but you know,

with risk, everybody strikes out sometimes. Listen, it's 365 days in a year. You're going to be off every couple. You fucking say it, dude. Yeah.

You tell Sean, you have the first pick. We're going to find out what you would name your boat right after this short break this episode of all fantasy everything is brought to you by schedule 35 now microdosing is an absolute game changer i have never heard a bad word about it and like we said this episode of all fantasy everything is brought to you by schedule 35 our partner in getting things done. Imagine if you could, let me just take you on a walk. You got a tool, sharpens your focus. It's going to clear your mind up. It's going to keep your anxiety at bay, which, man, wouldn't that be nice?

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Yes, I cried. Welcome back to All Fantasy Everything. We are about to start the draft. Sean Jordan, you have the first pick in what we would name our boats. You're on the clock. They're not all puns but some are and this is uh this is just the first one that popped out to me i think it'd be fun i'm gonna name my boat father of the tide oh that's pretty oh enjoy it it's got i'm a father it's just got

it's not you know it's not abrasive or anything not yet it's not too silly catchy it's interesting and uh this version interesting this version of my boat is uh we're not going crazy on this boat this isn't the boat that you go get nuts on this is the boat that you it's got some sip and scotch you know it's got a dvd player it's nothing crazy it's just a fun boat it's got a it's got a hot tub that did not come with the boat but it's got a hot tub on your boat i do on this one yeah whoa and you said it's this isn't the crazy one yeah this isn't this is oh this is just the simple hot tub i'm winging it i'm nervous i'm sure you can tell i'm nervous i'm pitting out

yeah father of the tide it's just right on the back i think it's fun and uh what font pretty basic i don't know the names of font was it like what's the basic one times new roman i would get father of the bride get the father of the bride font yeah oh yeah sure is that it's just cursive right i'm sure it's some kind of yeah i mean all those movies back then they probably had their own person who was like designing those do you think you could still do the alphabet and cursive all of you yeah 100 yeah uh z would be a problem i'm just thinking it's not that hard it's like it's z z looks harder than yeah like it flows pretty easy into the g's and the s's are hard yeah uppercase g is really gonna fuck me up right now oh that's

the one with two like ears on it yeah it's like a dinner platter with ears on it. Yeah. Oh, I just did it. Anyway, aren't they all supposed to connect? Yeah. That's the whole point. I don't think I can do it. You're at the end of your...

Wait, they're supposed to connect? Fuck! You don't think you can do it? I actually... Weird fact about me. I actually have... I had... I don't hardly you could do it i actually weird fact about me i actually have uh i had i don't hardly write anything by hand handwriting print was shit my my like handwriting like my cursive actually very lovely really yeah i never i had to take handwriting lessons when i was a kid and they stopped they gave up and they were just like i have fast erratic handwriting they said like i'm always in a rush and that's just how it's been my whole life it's also funny because

i can't draw for shit everything i draw looks like stick figures playing basketball that's good no it's not i think that's great it's bad yeah father of the tide you know what's crazy is how how long have i known you guys i don't think i've ever like seen your handwriting no any of yours i would never let you and you never fucking will i was thinking that the other day my mom wrote something down and i saw it and i was like i remember your handwriting and then i was like i don't yeah like you said i don't remember anybody else like if i see something that my mom wrote i would know that it was mine yeah hers and if i saw something that i wrote but like my little brother i don't know what his handwriting looks like right and that weird my older sister has great handwriting i know what hers looks like

i'm sure these are the kinds of things that i go and talk to people at the park yeah and you know what they got most of them have a pretty hard opinion they might surprise you yeah i just walk up and i'm like you, it's crazy these days. You know, technology and everything. It's like, I don't even know what my friend's handwriting looks like. Yeah. I just got a postcard I sent to myself and I didn't recognize my handwriting. Whoa.

Yeah. It's like, it's a lot neater than I wanted it to be. Where'd you send it from? Uh, Nice, France. Oh, yeah. I just sent myself a little pep talk from france don't let the fuckers get you down man it's that's that's the tone of it yeah i love it it just says on there you vote for whoever you want david just like

it just says french fries mayonnaise dollar sign dollar sign dollar sign this is from your cousin marvin bori oh man yeah i like writing yeah father of the tide father of the tide okay i like that one cute uh cute thanks dudes that. Thanks, dudes. That's a cute pick. Zach, time for your first pick. Okay, first pick. This, I'm pretty sure, is the name of a boat that I did go on in Hawaii.

So it's not super original. But it always... I went deep sea fishing and that's... What was her name? That's what I asked. She was a real deep sea. I've been having some issues lately. My deep sea?

The doctor said I have deep sea. High T in deep sea. Deep sea. I cry. I cry. I got deep sea. High T in deep sea. I cry. I cry. I got deep sea. Once again. 99th percentile range.

Would you like a script for some Vicodin? Yes, I would. But we went deep sea fishing, and deep sea fishing sucks. It was awful. Because you don't move. You're not going around and when your boat is moving i don't think about how it could sink like i'm just kind of like oh wonderful but when you're just sitting in the ocean and you're like wow that's like we're like

three miles away from the island so if we and then you just like i would go in anyway long story i believe you need to have kids to enjoy deep sea fishing yeah it's a long you need to be you need to you need to have like nothing be the better alternative yes there's just like all he has is like a whole cd case booklet of steely dan and yeah like some steely dan some like some miller lights and and then sitting there and that's so much better than what the alternative would be right come on you don't you don't have to have kids to enjoy some sd and some miller lights no no no no that's not what i'm saying that's not what i'm saying but to just sit there you know just to sit there i like it but i get you guys it was yeah it was my stepdad, and it was also one of those like,

oh, when he's around his friends, oh, he talks quite differently. But anyway, the boat was called Out of Bounds. That's dangerous, dude. It tells you a story. You can go so many ways with that. It's wonderful. You were married when you took off, and when you come back, you're divorced properly. paperwork's done i signed the big c it's all inbounds on the out of bounds yeah anything goes i like what sport you're recruiting for if you sign

yes you can you can definitely play cards on that it's whatever you want it to mean if you were like if someone was like hey i have that boat. It's whatever you want it to mean. If someone was like, hey, I have a boat. Do you want to come check it out? And then you're walking on it and you're like, what's the name of this boat? And you're like, Out of Bounds. You're like, I like it. Ooh. Yeah.

I like where this is going. Let me switch to my fedora. Yeah. Modelo and fedora. It's going to be a fodelo evening. The twins, Modelo and fedora it's gonna be a fodello evening the twins medello and fedora i feel like you see out of bounds in a marina and you're like oh my god does steve largent own that boat you know what i mean yes yes hell yes is that fucking steve largent's boat i'm so

happy you said that let me take a stab at who i think steve largent's boat i'm so happy you said that let me take a stab at who i think steve largent is and you tell me how was he a receiver for the seahawks yes was he really yeah yeah dude i have goosebumps i i that is shocking that that information is in my head still yeah laura wake up he really was he was a receiver for the seahawks yeah yeah number 80 bad motherfucker yeah bro it's it's kind of crazy how many guys are just in your head still steve largent was just in your head for years and you had no idea he was there how many times i'm walking around i'm just like huh warwick dunn yeah oh dvd absolutely dude i looked up uh derek thomas's fleer we went down a football card rabbit hole the other day because i was talking to my nephew about collecting cards he collects

pokemon i was like i used to be heavy into football cards and i just looked him up online so fun like just looking at derek thomas's fleer card yeah brought it like i might as well have been seven years old again in cj's bedroom so sick. Let me say these words to you. Mateen Cleaves. Let me say a little something. Olden Polonese. Olden Polonese. How about this one?

Fart Simpson. He got David. He got him. Ladies and gentlemen, we got him him i almost started laughing when i thought about it god damn it oh no out of bounds bud out of bounds i like it so i have other names that mean stuff this first name is just when I saw it, this was the first one that popped into my head. So picture this. It's sundown on the Mediterranean.

Go on. I'm on a catamaran. I knew you were going to do this. I'm with a woman. I don't know what else she's wearing, but she's wearing a scarf, a beautiful scarf. Yeah. Probably like a shit,

like a night, like a Gucci or Chanel. Yeah. Yeah. Like, like the way Rihanna looks when she's on the islands. Yeah. And,

uh, we're listening to sweetest taboo. Oh yeah. And, the sun's going down and we're just, uh, we're having some white wine on my boat. Yeah.

Calypso's kiss. Oh, Oh, get it tattooed on my back. God damn. Calypso's kiss. Calypso's kiss. It was the first thing that came to my mind when we said we were doing it.

That's the name of your boat and the name of your first novel. Yeah. Everything. Everything. His first album, novel. I got to rename the company. Oh, yeah. The LLC.

Dude, I got it. You should. You should rename your company Calypso's Kiss. All 100%. It's the sound of everything I want to sound like what a mood what a mood oh sweetest taboo yeah come on is that a what is sweetest taboo yeah oh yeah oh yeah i feel like even though you're listening to shy day even though you're in the mediterranean somewhere on the wind steel drums oh for sure yeah yeah faint have just just dance dancing off the peninsula yeah do i hear yeah do we hear steel

drums in the distance you're like probably probably dude the club says kiss and then you say that out loud and the wind just goes yes you do yeah that's all i got but yeah like your white wine has ice cubes in it but it's it's okay but it's classy it's classy totally because you know at least oh yeah is that how you say it i don't even know i think you say chablis but on calypso's kiss this is chablis with ice yes it is but it is classy yeah yeah yeah yeah and the ice cubes that's's just vodka. I don't know. I don't understand. I don't drink. Vodka doesn't freeze?

On Calypso Kiss? Yes, it does. It does freeze. Yes, it does. Things are a little different out here. A vodka kiss? A vodka kiss? Oh, there's a lot of vodka kisses on Calypso Kiss. There's a lot of vodka kisses on i feel like this woman you know the kind of like

like like beautiful blonde woman who's like probably in her 40s and a little bit past like a lot of the a lot a lot of the infrastructure has started sagging a little bit but that's how i like it it contributes to her glory you know what i mean like an old yeah like an old tall ship coming in to the harbor one last time in my head it was nisi nas oh nisi now oh nisi nash exact proportions but i'm thinking i'm thinking like uh the lipstick is on thick and the nails are long too oh yeah oh yeah i want to be on this boat with an older woman older woman yeah seriously calypso's kiss calypso's kiss that's that's good dude wow sean why are you looking around like somebody's

gonna come in back there man i don't know what's going on in the rest of the house something's happening all right time for my my uh my first pick we're off the uh we're off the coast of catalina yes all right i'm wearing i'm wearing white linen and it is only like legally it's buttoned but only in the strictly legal like you know it's billy to begin with i know what I mean? It's billowy to begin with. I know what you mean. And it's, I got this one thin chain. You know what I mean? I'm holding on. It's a sailboat. It's a sailboat, but it's like kind of a bigger,

it's a more open sailboat. I'm holding on to a rope. There is, there's a, there's a, there's a woman from Martinique on the front of it. We barely know each other. We barely know each other. We barely know each other we barely know each other we barely know each other it's sundown there's a beautiful wind just a beautiful gentle breeze you know a warm breeze

caressing my cheeks i'm pulling into harbor and as as my as my boat pass bys passes you by you look at the back and in a beautiful script you see the words champagne pink oh yeah now is that pink with an a champagne pink champagne pink Pink with an A? Champagne pink. Champagne pink. Which boat's yours? This is the pink one. Champagne pink.

You come on there, you'd be ready for a panking. I'll tell you what. You have to walk the pink off that boat. Yeah, dude. Pancakes for the table over there. Champ yeah yeah yeah it's in a it's in a pink font or two things i love yeah champagne and pink dude are the boats what do they make boats that aren't white i know it sounds like a ridiculous question but can you get like a gigantic green boat if you want yes i think so. You can get a boat painted any color you want, really. You never see that.

They're all white. Well, it's because if you're lost at sea, you want it to be easier to spot. Yeah. Oh, no, not me, man. Look for green and all that blue. It's a green boat? If I'm lost at sea,

it's because the wrong people are looking for me. That's true. I'm trying to stay lost. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. what color is your boat just it's it's colored i'm not trying to be found at sea when i went and got my boat i told them to paint it ocean so it's gonna be tough to find me well mine the champagne pink has a lot of natural hardwood on deck well i'll tell you that all right are you doing this on are you baiting me right now? No. Boners, dude. It's a bachelor party boat.

It's got a lot of natural hardwood on the champagne pink, dude. A lot of nautical grade hardwood. You can hit it with a hammer. It's totally fine. Are you baiting me? I'm baiting something. A lot of rope. Is it a sailboat? I missed it. It's a sailboat i missed it that's a sailboat yeah you got it roger that

10-4 yeah are you that are you a skipper yeah i'm a skipper yeah do these have the big wheel yeah it's a sailboat wait you don't see ian just standing right next to the mizzen boom you don't see that dude oh yeah he's uh cranking up the jib. I'm out of my element. See all the mainsail sets? Yeah. Anyone on here ever been sailing? I've never been on a sailboat. Oh, yeah.

I mean, that's Ben sailing. I think we got to fix that, right? Bucket list. That should be sooner than later. And I don't even have that separately on a bucket list i have starboard side on the bucket list and then i have the other one port port port yeah yep uh port side starboard yeah we're gonna we're gonna avast the davey jones lock i'm done i'm done i'm gonna stay

in theme for my second pick so these two boats are of a piece. But this is a motorboat. Sean. Sean immediately lost it. You made it through hardwood on deck, but motorboat got you. I have joy in my heart, and I like to laugh. I'm sorry. It's a double outboard.

It's a double outboard kind of a double outboard uh kind of pleasure cruiser it's got a deck it's got a like a fly deck on it and uh you know you can you can fit you know you can have 12 people having a good time on this boat but probably you wouldn't want any more than 12 people on this boat but you can have 12 people having a good time it's got a sleeper cabin if it goes there for the evening. And the name of this boat is Sumptuous Evenings. Oh, God damn. Sumptuous.

God damn. See, I love a boat that sounds like an R&B album. Sumptuous Evenings, dude. How do you spell sumptuous? You know how to spell it. Put your dick in it. It has a P in it. Yeah, you do. How do I spell it?

I take my pants off first. How do I spell it? Naked. That yeah how do you how do i spell it i take my pants off first how do i spell it naked how do i spell it with a robe clinging onto my shoulders holding on for dear life dude people on the people on the shore they're just like that robe has to be taped on or so i don't know how it's being held honey honey get in the house there's a sumptuous man about that the only way that robe is staying up is because that robe wants to be there exactly yeah exactly some sumptuous evening if something happened on that boat like god forbid that it wouldn't say like area man lost at sea it'd be like sumptuous man lost to see this man lost to see sumptuous man lost in the abyss sumptuous man claimed by the claimed by the deep

i've i've been claimed by the deep a couple times i had to smoke a cigarette oh yeah sometimes they'll claim you and then they'll spit you right back out yeah it will yes it will sumptuous evenings man that boat it's a it's not just the name of a boat it's a mission statement that's what i'm trying to have on there it's we're having a we're having a pork a pork loin in a in a in a rosé uh-huh yeah i love a pork loin oh it's so good plus to have pork on the sea Come on Everyone's expecting fish I didn't know you could do that until you just said that To be honest it never crossed my mind

Ivan Carmel was a big proponent of pork rinds I like a chicharron Yeah chicharron when we were on the high seas It's just chips right They're just chips It's like fried pork skin That's really what it is It's like skin chips

I thought they were chips. I just thought they were like normal potato chips named pork rinds for some reason. Nope. Nope. Cool. It didn't. It just happened again. What happened?

Now you know that pork rinds are pork. Yeah. I've learned more on this show than I did in school. That is a problem. That is an issue with the public school system. Not for the best. I wish you could have been confident in school and just being like, what are pork rinds?

Is that chips or... Every time now, if I don't know something, I always stop. If I don't know what a word means or something, I always make myself i always stop like if i don't know what a word means or something i always make myself stop and be like i don't know what that means can you explain it to me and people no one's ever like made fun of me so if you're scared do that if you don't know what something means just ask if somebody makes fun of you then break their nose because it's insane for them to do that oh i think that would i think that would help a lot of problems in this world oh absolutely and as a person who works in

construction i pretend to know they're like get the crescent crescent saw and i'm like for sure and i go down there i'm like i google it i look at my phone oh dude i was like 30 minutes later they're like where was it i was like oh it's buried under a bunch of stuff dude come on i was helping uh big torque daddy put up a pergola not that long ago i remember the pergola saga there was a guy there and so we have a ryobi weed whacker so as a joke i often say tools man i say i'm a ryobi man and so i said that to a guy that didn't know me right we're putting up this pergola now he had a ryobi drill and i was like i'm a ryobi man myself and then he thought i was serious and he talked to me about what kind of tools he likes for a good 10 minutes i couldn't be like oh i was just kidding i don't give a fuck oh i was just i was

i'm cosplaying he was like yeah he used to be a ryobi guy but i had to switch and i'm like oh dog what's he like a dewalt guy now it's not like that stanley makes great tools i don't use homeowner tools i'm gonna start calling you ryobi son yeah do it i'm like i'm a pay to have someone do it guy because i don't know what's going on no uh i would i would we want to find out what's going on is with david's second pick all right so i'm on my miami shit on this one okay huge ass cigarette boat yeah cherry red you can see the engine in the back there's only there's only room for four motherfuckers in there and you know what we're doing we're cutting up lines of blow and doing johnny walker on the hammer throw whoa the hammer throw shit yeah yo my god that's

that boat is for going fast the hammer thrown or the hammer throw? The hammer throw. God, dude. Yeah. It's a verb, baby. Oh, yeah. Old English shadowing letters. Hammer throw.

Old English? I've never seen old English on a boat. Yeah. No. Not until you went on the hammer throw. You get me on the hammer throw, you're going to see a 40-pole of it. I'll tell you that. Oh, yeah, dude. Dude, the hammer throw you get me on the hammer throw you're gonna see a 40 full of it i'll tell you that oh yeah dude if you get me do the hammer throw if it's like it's

danger i feel like that boat has four engines on the back and hulk hogan used to own three of them 100 there's only four hammer throws in the world yeah yeah three of them are at hulk's house you gotta sign a non-disclosure agreement to get on that boat oh yeah you gotta you gotta sign an nda to get to the pier yeah the cell phone stays on the dock oh yeah oh yeah put it in one i put in one of those chappelle bags yeah that is tight and phones on the dot or just throw them in the water i don't care but get rid of the phone i'll buy you a new phone when we dock only boat that's been used in a cash money video and a bad boy video. Oh.

And three Michael Bay productions. I'm like, I'm on there smoking a cigarette with a holster. Like one of those Hunter S. Thompson's. Yeah. Man, we got to get to Miami. I need to see this happen. Who you telling? Yeah. I did my blood. Yeah. It'd be fun fun i've been to miami but not with the right

people i've been to miami with the right guy one time and it was fucking wild yeah you have to go to miami with i went on that eric andre tour but oh yeah his uh his assistant is from there dude did you see that new jackass trailer? I did. Did you see where he's getting that iced coffee? Dude, I can't wait for the new Jackass on all levels. It's crazy how where there's no other comedy or anything that gets you to that place of laughing in that. Just see Johnny Knoxville. Me and Sam T. are trying to see it at midnight, but I don't think they're showing it. I had a chance to see it at work, and i passed because i want to see it in

i want to see it in a theater oh yeah i don't want i don't want to see it with like three other people on like a computer screen for sure no for sure yeah i want to be right i want to see it with you guys is what i want to see it with come down february 4th is that the day february 4th yeah just had lance on here you would think it's february 4th okay yeah yeah the hammer throw dude the hammer i love it old english i doesn't have a little hammer like a like a i think it should okay here's what i'm talking about it's the hammer cock to the side and then like the motion motion lines. Oh, yeah. In the motion lines is where it says hammer.

Yeah. You know what I'm saying? But the motion lines, if you look really close, it's cocaine. Oh, David, we're on the hammer. That's also your anchor. Your anchor isn't like an anchor design. It's a big fucking hammer. Then when you get to where you can't see any land, you're like, I'm going to throw the

hammer down. You can throw it down. Yeah. Yeah. You're like, Sean, you did tie it to the where you can't see any land you're like all right i'm gonna throw the hammer down and you throw it down yeah yeah you're like sean you did tie it to the boat right and it just and then we dump the body in the water because that's obviously what we're doing on the hammer throw whoa dump the body in the water was also going to be one of my picks but that's okay i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm saying i'm saying picks i'm saying let's get to your pick yeah zach it's time for your second pick. Okay. I think this is just going to be kind of like a smaller fishing boat.

Nothing crazy. But this is the boat that I got from the divorce. Yeah. And here's the thing. Were there times where there was acrimony? Sure. Yeah. Was it always peaceful sure but maybe time goes by and you realize like everyone's trying their best everyone's just doing their best so you got to move on with your life and that's why i would name this boat yesterday's Yo, that is a really real pick. Yeah. Oh, man.

Oh, man. Oh, man. Yeah, I feel that. You got some wordplay in it. It sounds cool. That's a life philosophy, dude. Yeah. Don't worry about that.

That's yesterday's quarrel, brother. Leave it on the shore, man. Come on. That's yesterday's quarrel. Yeah, yeah. Hey, there's an ecosystem on that, but I don't have to be there anymore. Yeah. Yesterday's quarrel, brother. I love it. Yeah, yeah. Hey, there's an ecosystem on that, but I don't have to be there anymore. Yeah.

Yesterday's quarrel, brother. Yeah, I think that would be that's a big like, hey man, forget about it. That's like if you drove by and saw a single guy on a boat that said yesterday's quarrel, you're just like just give him his space. Yeah.

I think that's his spot. Don't talk to him. Don't talk to him. Don't talk to him. He'll figure it out. Don't you toot that horn. He's got boundaries now. Me and Chris were joking about that. Like just going everywhere I go now.

I'm like, I have boundaries. Okay. I've got boundaries now. That's a great thing this is uh yeah it said it was on sale but it's not ringing up that way i have boundaries i can't deal i can't deal i just can't deal uh breaking my boundaries and everyone's like go get out of here i will i will stop telling me what to do it's a breach of my boundaries

yesterday's quarrel what kind of what kind of boat is it i feel like it's like kind of a smaller yeah it's a smaller it's one of those like it's probably like an older fishing boat where it has like those little seats up front yeah like those little little spinners they spin around yeah the bat like a bass tracker yeah it's like a lake boat it's not so much like an ocean it's a boat for smoking cigarettes on right yeah which is weird to have something called coral and you're in a fresh water but you know what i mean that's all right yeah it's coral though it's not coral it's coral i'm nuts i hope they understand that bit yeah Yeah, yeah, yeah. I was doing the Top Gun thing.

Sometimes I forget that not everybody can see us. Oh, yeah, we're doing the inverted from Top Gun hand signal. I am unhinged. That burrito is gross. Where are you going to flick all your cigarette butts? In the ocean. Wait, you went top. you went top with it oh yeah you in the ocean there we go there we go fold it over baby uh friggin sean jordan time for your second and your third picks as it is uh so we were in costa rica and i always think of this is like the one like

crazy out of the country vacation i took but we were on a cat rica and i always think of this is like the one like crazy out of the country vacation i took but we were on a catamaran and right as the sun it was just like a perfect day and the sun went down and i was with some of my best friends in the whole world and i like i didn't have any money at the time and it was a fluke that i even got to go because i got like a 1500 voucher from united once at a gate to take an hour late flight. So anyway, I got to go and the sun went down and Montel Jordan kicked on and it's just the lyrics. So I want to name the boat. This is how we do it.

Oh, that's a great boat name. That's a great boat name. It kicked on. It's like, this is how we do. And I was like, oh, it just is. It was, everything was right. Everything was perfect. I'm sorry.

For some reason, it just flashed in my head where it's like a terrible storm and you're like, Mayday, Mayday. This is how we do it. We're taking a lot of water. I repeat, this is how we do it. So you're good. No, no. No, no. Please don't

mistake my hilarious boat name i am we are in distress this is how we do it this is how we do it we need backup oh shit yo also i just knowing you i could imagine that moment was great oh man i was right next to me i imagine you were like that's what you do it was like your brain released the dmt a little bit you can see the sun like you know what i mean when it's going over the horizon you can see it that i swear the second it disappeared they had they had it queued up and it just as loud of course i'm sure they do it for every tour but as loud as it could go it's like this is how and we were all just like freaking out throwing our

drinks in the air it was crazy the sun's like oh fuck me then huh yeah waited for me to fucking leave it was nuts man and then we get in the whip and at the van and the driver he just looks back and he's like it was something where like somebody had a beer or something. And the driver's like, I'm just not going to look. And we're like, what? And it's crazy what can happen in a different country. I don't know. It just doesn't seem. That can happen here, my friend.

That's, oh, you've never had a beer in a car in America? Mr. Sioux Falls. A little road soda. Yeah. It's crazy what can happen when you get out of the country. You can have beers in your car. A little road soda. It's crazy what can happen when you get out of the country. You can have beers in your car. A couple of pops. There's no laws down there. A couple

oat bubblies, if you know what I mean. Oat bubblies is the worst name for beer I've ever heard. An oat bubbly? Oh shit, that was... We're saying fix. Sorry, sorry, sorry. Like a big old horse poop. There's an oat bubbly in the road So that's

That's number two And third, I mean, this is extremely Basic, but I had to do it I just had a daughter What else am I going to do? I'm going to name the boat Maxine I think it's also a fun name It's a fun name for a boat too It's a good boat name too

Maxine, it's just, there's Max boat too it's a good boat name too you know maxine it's just there's maxine and then you could you know you could like throw a colon on there or something maxine queen of the sea or something like that sure um like underneath it so it'd be like maxine and then queen of the sea something like that uh and then you're like you're like oh yeah well like i lost maxine in the divorce and they're like what you're like no no no the boat the boat the boat yeah yeah this this is you know i don't i don't ever get to see her but i get to go on the boat Oh, yeah. Well, like, I lost Maxine in the divorce. And they're like, what? And you're like, no, no, no, no. The boat. The boat. The boat. Yeah, yeah. I don't ever get to see her, but I get to go on the boat and I named it after her.

Sometimes I just read stories to the boat. Joe, come on. I don't like this. I made it. I did it. I did it. I'll take responsibility. Thanks for coming all the way out to the middle of nowhere with me. It's been a tough divorce and I really wanted to talk to you about it. They're like, I didn't know you got divorced. I me. It's been a tough divorce and I really wanted to talk to you about it.

They're like, I didn't know you got divorced. I did. It's been rough and nobody will talk to me. So I had to come out here where we can't see land. And I only brought a few guns and we're just going to see how the talk goes. There's a harpoon gun. Yeah, it was rough. Max seems a good name for a boat that just needs to take its high heels off after a long day at work.

You know what's funny? I'm trying to piece together a decent short set, if you will. And I forgot that Ian said that Maxine sounds like a name. What do you say? You're like, I hate to tell you this, but it sounds like Maxine has just had it up to here. Yeah, it sounds like the name of a middle-aged black woman who's just had it. It does. It really does.

Who has just had it. Oh, that's my Aunt Maxine. She's always pissed off. Yeah. Yeah. No, I don't know why Aunt Maxine is always yelling. Yeah. Her feet are swollen.

Dogs are barking. Yeah. Third name is Maxine. And and then i'm just gonna be ridiculous for the other two so i'm excited all right i made it through with very little ridicule so far so the other two are gonna say it's shit that you named your boat after your daughter yeah yeah yeah fuck you you fucking bozo what a dumb name, you idiot. Way to go. Ding dong. Fuck you, dude. I named it after a person I created.

Fucking boofus. Yeah, anybody can create a person if they got the cum. Put it on a shirt, my man. What is it? You put it in real tiny letters though. You just go out to weddings? What does your shirt say? And they real tiny letters, though. You should go to weddings. What does your shirt say? And they're like a foot away.

Baby showers. I could make them, too, if I had the gum. Only difference between you and me? Fuckers. Just for the record, I do have cum. Born on third base, acting like you hit a triple. Fuckers. Just for the record, I do have cum. Born on third base, acting like you hit a triple. Yeah, man.

Oh, big deal. You're just drunk at the baby shower? Check my laundry basket. It's full of it. Oh, boo-hoo. The guy that doesn't have any cum is hammered again. What? Oh, boo-hoo. The guy that doesn't have any cum is hammered again. What?

I got cum. I just don't know where to put it. I'm drowning in it. Don't think I don't have a baby because I don't have the cum. Okay, I got the cum. Honestly, sometimes I feel like I'm in a boat in a lake full of cum, and there's a hole in it, and all I got is a cup, and I'm just trying to get it out.

I'm bailing cum out of my boat. My eyes feel pressure in the back. That's not good. David, thank you so much for the recommendation of Theragunning the skull.

I've been doing that. You're not supposed to talk about that on here. What? Now you guys where all my cum went no uh david told me that sometimes he'll theragun like the top of his head yeah and i was interested and i finally did it and I was doing it all over. And I was like, oh my God, I didn't know that my head was sore. Yeah, it's really nice.

Like, especially on your temples. Zach, time for your third pick. Okay, third pick, short, sweet, to the point. I think what's great about this one is when you see it, you would hear it in your head. Yeah. And it's's wake me up it works both ways when you see it you're like oh hell yeah yeah oh man is it is it big like

i'm picturing those letters that look like they're shaking yeah yeah yeah like those panic room letters yeah yeah yeah like for like a coffee shop in a beach town like that yeah there yeah like those panic room letters yeah yeah yeah like for like a coffee shop in a beach town like that yeah there's like that stainless steel around the around the boat it just looks insane you poured jager bomb all over it or something yeah i like that you say jager bomb like it's a pre-packaged liquid it should be why it's not as crazy to me it's because it's gross david it's great because we live in a country with a government yeah oh sure because you have a child in the kool-aid man i'll be over here with my jaeger bomb all right free package don't you can't that's what they want you to say after all the jaeger moms we've had together i'm just saying it shouldn't

come in the jaeger bombs with you sean you should have to go ask another adult if you can have it at the time you want it it shouldn't just be in your fridge he always does he's always like if i take a jaeger bomb will you have one that's how it is set up every time oh yeah every time that's how he sets the table yeah adam was making fun of me last high plans he was he was just like i've never seen anyone do it like that nobody does it anymore you're the one keeping it alive you're keeping it alive man that's i gotta look myself in the mirror david okay are kids drinking jagger mom still or is that like in our generation way no they're eating pills and jacking off to euphoria here's what i'm saying though in like five five years that trend's gonna come back around around. That's coming back, dude.

Just like baggy jeans. Yeah. Baggy jeans, Jager bombs, not wearing condoms. I'm bringing 06 back. 06, dude. Dude. And you know where it's 06? On the wake me up, dude.

Wake me up! That's the only place I drink. It's stainless steel. You can wash it down with a power washer i love it i love it yep it's on lake havasu oh yes it is yes it is that's a hundred percent right under like wake me up was featured prominently in a girl scum wild video. Oh, absolutely. And then you're like, hey, Zach, where are you going to pick me up from the... Are you in the Wake Me Up? And I'm like, yeah, I'm right under Old London Bridge. Yeah, I'm five out. I'm five out.

Five out, Wake Me Up. It's a big comment thread on the Wake Me Up. Yeah, I'm about five out. I'm five out, brother. Brother? Y'all know that, right? The Old London Bridge is in Lake Havasu. I do know that.

I do know that because I recently went to Foggy Old. What did I tell you? I learned more on this podcast than I did in school. That is, once again, you learned to read in school. David, let me just address that. I didn't like how long that paused. That was a big pause. Yeah. Well, I did. i yeah i don't know i did

learn how to read i don't have anything funny i know how to read you really shut it down like you don't want to talk about it anymore he's afraid of trolls there are there's a there's a thick contingent of AFE fans who at one time or another believe that Sean He actually doesn't know how to read. We thought he couldn't read. There's loose change three. That's what it's

about is whether Sean can read or not. Yeah, dude. I can read right between the lines. It's hours long. I guess you like to obey the rules of what the government tells you an hour is huh i just say it starts it starts and then it ends i don't believe in government provided hours to watch things oh man all right you're one of those

fucking clock people huh all right it's my turn yeah Fart Simpson oh it's uh you know middle of the day uh let's say the Caspian Sea I don't even know where that is it's in Eastern Europe this is like my big succession sized yacht

Caspian Sea is actually in Asia. Okay. Technically the world's largest lake. That's what I've been saying. So I got a lake yacht. We're eating some kind of fresh fruit, not native to here. Jackfruit, maybe.

Ooh. And we are on destiny's climate. Wow. Whoa. Jesus, these are dope whoa wow that those big-ass boats do have names that don't make sense yeah like where it's like it's because there's like layers at first you're like whoa that's deep and then you're like i don't think that means anything yeah you pay like wait does that mean the world's gonna end and end? And part of the boat staff that you pay full time

is a guy to stay down in the engine room and try to make sense of the name. Yeah. Wait, the climate. He's got like an abacus. Yeah, he's been flown in from the Sarbonne. Anytime you're on the boat, he comes to to try to just crack that name.

And guess what, buddy? You'll be sitting down, so there'll be another Sarbonne. You know what I mean? Oh, got him. Come on now. Take it easy. Destiny's climate. Sean, buddy? You'll be sitting down, so there'll be another sore bone. You know what I mean? Oh, got him. Come on now. Take it easy. Destiny's climate. Sean?

Nothing? I just can't imagine. I'm trying to think if Maxine pulled up next to that boat. What's going to happen? You're just going to blow me out of the water? Maxine would never be allowed in the same water as the Destiny's climate, dude. Destiny's climate? Yeah.

It's so dank. All the water, it's a very very i'm eating a piece of ice i blew it yeah the azerbaijani coast guard would make it clear and in no uncertain terms that you are not with allowed within three nautical miles of the destiny's climate oh yeah because they're in my pocket yeah that's a whole fucking thing dude that's a whole and by the way that's any of us that's not just, that's any of us. That's not just you. That's any of the three of us.

I can't pull up sumptuous evenings next to the Destiny's Climate. Listen, I'm only in Azerbaijan because it's a non-extradition country. Yeah, right. They can't come get you unless Batman's on the case. Shit's already went bad. Yeah. I really thought you were going to pick Caspian's Kiss. Like there would just be all of your votes would be Kiss.

All my votes are kissing. That sounds like a young Jeezy lyric. All my votes are kissing. Absolutely. It probably is. Also, I thought about this. Why aren't there, like, monster boats? Like, monster trucks, but boats.

And they drive over shitty boats for fun I don't know that's I like it I don't know the science behind it but I like it save that for like the third or fourth date don't don't do that on the first date you know honey I call her honey

immediately now babe put down your chicken check this shit out honey honey immediately. Now, babe. Put down your chicken. Check this shit out. Listen up, honey. Man. I'm just really getting into the Caspian Sea. I can already see the rest of my day unfolding.

I'm seeing the rest of my day unfolding here. Caspian. The Caspian Sea. It's also so gnarly that it's that big of a lake that they're like yeah call to see who gives a shit it's the world's largest inland lake and it has a partial salinity to it oh so it's that you know it does have sea-like qualities salinity i don't know what i don't know what sea-like qualities are mermaid that'd be a dope boat name can i damn salinity jordan is that what you're thinking salinity no just the name salinity is a dope boat name what kind of animals okay i'm getting distracted yeah yeah yeah i'm sorry i gotta get

out of here no no it's sean's big i gotta go guys i don't know and we never saw and we never saw ian again definitely this thing definitely has a helicopter that lands on it right yeah yeah okay yeah all that all that all the bells and whistles full wolf of wall street uh it is time for my next pick it is time for my next pick and uh this is a seagoing vessel this thing is built for this thing is built for damage it's got a it's got a steel reinforced hull. It's big. You know what I mean?

It's like you can take this thing into rough seas. You can take this thing into icy seas. You're fine. You can take this thing into any sea because the name of this boat is Shuribidis, Spirit of the Tides. Whoa. Whoa. Yeah.

Say it again. Shuribidis, Spirit of the Tides. Don yeah say it again shuribidus spirit of the tides don't hurt him say it again shuribidus spirit of the tides one more one more shuribidus spirit of the tides yeah it sounds like uh like cry havoc like it yeah it is named after a sea monster from ancient greek lore one of the ones that uh that odysseus has to defeat in the odyssey shrived shrived spirit of the tides and it's just a big fucking it's just a big fucking boat dude ribbitus shrews shrews i don't even know what that word means that's that that's a name what does it look like uh spell it for me c-h-a-r-b-y-d-e-s whoa shribbities that's not at all what i was gonna guess dude we should have let us that should be that should be your wi-fi password dude that's your shribbities. That's not at all what I was going to guess. We should have let us get a try first.

That should be your Wi-Fi password, dude. That's shribbities. What is it? Shribbities. If you want to access my internet, you must answer this rate of three. Oh my gosh. It looks like a, well, judging from what it says,

the first picture on, it looks sort of like a butthole. Yeah. It's a whirlpool. Davidid you're on a wrong tab that is a butthole that was that was my work tab looks like a zoomed in butthole looks like somebody cropped in a chicken nugget to a butthole i don't know it looks like someone glued googly eyes to a butthole and they made it like a mouth of a ghost and why would you name your boat after that i get it i would not ask that question you wouldn't ask that question chiribity is spirit of the Tides Chiribides, love it So that's, oh shit I forgot

So before we get to my next pick We're going to take a short break This episode of All Fantasy Everything Is brought to you by Babbel If you want to learn a new language The best way is to uproot your entire life You drop everything you're doing Just go to a brand new country

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All Fantasy Everything. Hi. Hi. We do have to pace her up just a little bit. Just a little bit. We have to pace her up. So we're going to whip through these last picks here. With my fourth pick, I'm going to name this boat.

It's a pleasure craft. It's a sea-going or lake-going pleasure craft. It probably is a catamaran. And the name of this boat is the HMS Michael McDonald. Ooh. John won't be all right. moran uh and the name of this boat is the hms michael mcdonald it is named after that yacht rock crooner himself michael mcdonald but before that i put her majesty's ship yeah i love hms it sounds so cool it sounds so cool the hms michael mcdonald taking it to the seas all Taking it to the seas. All right.

So because we do have to keep it moving, HMS Michael McDonald. David, time for your fourth pick. My fourth pick. So this is a boat I could get in real life. We're talking outboard motor, weekends with the boys. I would love it to be a bass tracker. I don't have that kind of money. So just like a real basic fishing boat. We're going going to the lake and i'm calling it the bust rocket oh

yeah yeah i mean you get it the bust rocket yes you like bought it pre-distressed like jeans? Yeah. Yeah. No, no, no. I distressed it. Oh, okay. I'm the one who stressed it. I like it. Yeah. Bust rocket.

Bust rocket is a perfect name. Not much else to explain. Zachary. Okay. My next boat would be a companion boat to the wake me up and it's can't wake up. Yes. I love a theme yeah is it like a lifeboat on the side of it that has its own name like a sidecar but a lifeboat absolutely absolutely or it could be a jet ski on the back of it oh yeah i think a jet ski yeah airbrushed yeah yeah

airbrushed jet ski 100 zach's taking evanescence out for the weekend dude he told me a story when they came into uh the boiler room to do karaoke and the husband of the wife started the song and then she was like okay i can't let you do this and then she came up and fucking cranked it. Wow. That's awesome. I would like to see that. I would love to see that. That's exactly as much Evanescence as I ever want to see. Absolutely.

I just need one song. But I also want to see that. Yeah, I like it. Sean, time for your fourth and then your final picks. My fourth pick is going to be, I don't know, really, I just thought it'd be fun. I'm going to call it The Wet Dream. Oh, my God. Oh, so right next to Maxine, you fucking psycho. I don't really know. I just thought it'd be fun. I'm going to call it the wet dream. Oh my God.

Right next to Maxine? You fucking psycho. Is that the same dog? It's fun. It doesn't have to be gross. Honey, should we take the Maxine or the wet dream today? What are we feeling? Hey, that guy named his boat after what happens when you cum when you're asleep. Hey, honey, look. Hey, honey honey look at that man in his boat that he named after when you jizz yourself and you're when you're slumbering oh buddy yeah oh you

gotta tell everyone you got cum you're just losing in your sleep fuck you just out here bragging son my last pick yeah it's gonna be another pun it's gonna be michael c jordan yeah man michael c jordan michael wow jordan beautiful yeah that's great zach time for your final pick uh my final pick, this would be the first boat I own, and it would be like, it would say, holy shit, I actually own a fucking boat. What the fuck? Oh, that's the name of the boat?

Yeah, yeah, yeah, exactly. I love that. It's a long title. Holy shit, I own a boat. What the fuck? And then real tiny under it, yes, I do. Yes, I do. Yes, I do.

What the fuck? Excellent for a for about david your final pick uh this is this is late in life david i've retired to my property that i do own on banana island you guys i'm i'm coming to the airport to pick you guys up in my little boat it's tropically painted outboard wood, and it's called Mama Salon. Because Salon is what we call Sierra Leone. Oh, that's amazing. Beautiful. Good on you. That's sick. I really like that.

Mama Salon. My final pick. This is Dana Schwartz. Recently had a book number one on the New York Times bestseller list. And, you know i i'm about to marry her and then this is a scenario where it goes south for some reason this is 10 years down the line it goes south you know what i mean but by this point she's as successful as she's going to be either way uh-huh we get divorced i buy a boat and that boat's name is palimony yes oh nice yeah i slammed my cat to that one.

Yeah, dude. That's perfect. Also, slam my cat, not a euphemism for women masturbating. I have a I have a stress cat. I'm gonna slam my cat. David, no. They're animals. I'll probably stay in this weekend

and slam my cat. I'm pretty horny. No one's doing anything about it. I'm just going to slam my cat. No one's helping me out. What if people were that honest? What are you doing? I'm pretty horny and I don't have a partner,

so I'm just going to go slam my cat. Probably stay home and jack off all week. Probably like six or seven times. Boy, I need it. I can't find a cat to slap it, if you know what I'm saying. Yeah, a lot of people just beat off for once. Marissa, do you have a pick for a boat name? Yeah, so my favorite boat name,

which was the first one that came to mind when we had this draft topic, it came out of in 2016 when the Natural Environment Research Council asked the public to suggest a name for their new 200 million euro polar scientific research ship. They conducted a poll online and the winning name that received the most votes was Boaty McBoatface. That's so dope. Laura told me that last night. I did not knowface. That's so dope. Laura told me that last night. I did not know that. That's so sick.

200 million euros. Amazing. Bodie McBoatface, an excellent name for a vote. To recap, Sean, you went first. You took Father of the Tide. This is how we do it. Maxine, The Wet Dream, and Michael C.J.

Wait a minute, they rhyme. I didn't know they rhyme. What? and michael c i didn't know they rhyme what have you seen the wet dream what shit oh man oh fuck man i just laughed so hard i lost my vision for a second

oh great oh zach you went second you took out of bounds yesterday's quarrel uh do you want to handle these next two names wake me up and can't And then, holy shit, I actually own a boat. What the fuck? David, you went third. You took Calypso's Kiss, The Hammer Throw, Destiny's Climate, Bust Rocket, and Mama Salon. I went last. I took Champagne Pink, Sumptuous Evenings, Chiribidus, Spirit of the Tides, HMS Michael McDonald, and Palomone. That's the best list we've ever had. I'd ride on all these boats.

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