All Fantasy Everything - Cats (w/ Debra DiGiovanni)

Episode Date: August 22, 2024

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This is a HeadGum Podcast. Welcome to another brand new episode of All Fantasy Everything, the podcast where we fantasy draft anything and everything from the world of pop culture. Today we are fantasy drafting cats and our guest is the wonderful stand up comedian Deborah DiGiovanni. Hey. I feel like I got a little marina on it there. DiGiovanni. Hey! Oh, I feel like I got a little meridians on it there. DiGiovanni. You gave it a little something and I'm into it.

You're really into it. Thank you very much. Between that and this mustache, I might be going full Italian this episode. Woo! I love it, I love it. I am your host, Ian Carmel, and with me as always are my good friends and stand-up comedians, Sean Jordan and David Borey. Here we are, we're drafting cats.

Cats. Real and fictional, correct? Real and fictional, all cats. Any cat. Every cat. All the time. We're taking individual cats. My last name was Cats before my grandfather changed it to Carmel. Really?

After coming to the United States of America, yeah. Two delicious treats. It wasn't even that Katz was too Jewish. Yeah, he just wanted to be more delicious. He wanted us to have a delicious experience in the United States. We're coming to the land of milk and honey. I'm naming him Carmel.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Sometimes I wonder how my life would be different if my name was Katz. And I figure, I'm already in entertainment. I don't think it would be that different. Somehow I think the mustache would be bigger. I think it would be, I think it would twirl at the side. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

I think a hyphenated would have been nice too. Caramel Katz, Katz Caramel. Oh. That's Caramel. Caramel, we missed it up. Yeah. That's a musician. I might be changing it.

I can take the lawn to my own hands now I'm an adult. I just turned 18. You can do whatever you want. Let's get through these introductions Sean Jordan is here Sean Cougar Melon Jordan on Instagram Sean S Jordan I did that backwards on Twitter. Yeah, that's I mean that X I Don't worry about it. I can't remember the last time I put anything on there. Did you, do you ever post on there? No, Instagram's fun, man.

I go on, I go on Twitter to check DMs sometimes, but no, but anyway. John S. Jordan, whose most recent tweet, Oh no. Not retweeting something, was you saying, get it bud on July 25th, did Chris Fairbanks do an escape board trick? Excellent.

Oh man, he did a really, okay, real quick. I'll be in Seattle, last comedy club, August 30th to 31st. Please come out, I get a bonus if I sell tickets. Chris Fairbanks. You say you get a boner if you sell tickets? I get a boner. No, I get a boner at the top of the Space Needle, which I'm gonna do this time.

You're going up? I've never done it, I'm doing it. I might even go to that goddamn rock museum. I'm in a good mood. Oh, I'm gonna do that, I'm gonna do that Sleepless in Seattle tour. You fucking take that to the bank, for sure. Yeah, I got a boat tour.

I'm doing it by myself. Where do they go? Do they go to the oyster house that he hangs out with? Or is that the right movie? By his house? They take you, so I did a show there, a private show, but it was in some restaurant and I looked over and I was like, I feel like that house is right here.

And they go, yeah, it's right there, you can see it. So his house in the movie was right there. And then they go, there's a boat doing a tour. So they take you down the channel or the sound or whatever. I don't give a shit what they do, I'm doing it. I can't wait. I'm trying to figure out what that would be. There's his houseboat that Tom Hanks lives in.

There's the oyster place he goes to with Rob Reiner. That could be a fun stop, although not for you. No, I'd barf everywhere. I can't stand oysters, but I'd go. Debra, the man doesn't eat seafood. What? Nothing at all? I feel like we could sneak a Rockefeller in there.

Well, and then they take you to the Empire State Building. So they go all the way down through the Panama Canal and they take you to the Empire State Building. And it's a six month boat tour. Shouldn't be too bad. That's nice. Robats. Oyster Rockefeller, Sean, is like an oyster covered

in like cheese and some other stuff. It's got like bacon in there. They're good, dude. I think there's bread crumbs. That was gonna be my rapper name on Spotify, but it was taken. Oysters Rockefeller? Shout out to whoever got it. David Borey is here, CoolGuyJokes87 on Instagram.

He was supposed to have packed up last night, although I'm seeing the same pictures on the wall. Oh, well this is the last thing. This is the last although I'm seeing the same pictures on the wall. A lot of shit hanging. This is the last thing, because I gotta record, this is the last thing I'm doing. David's moving, Debra. He's moving to a house, which is very cool. Oh my God, that's exciting. Yeah, park life.

Yeah, I used to be downtown driving all the old men crazy. You guys, I like that song. Are you moving in with your partner? Is it just you alone? What are you doing? Yeah, yeah, moving in. Fantastic. To become one.

Congrats. It's exciting. A packing sucks, but. Are we doing everything in song today? I feel like we're just, everything is lyric right now. I like that. I love it. Yeah, this is a good, this is,

cause my pics are gonna go with that for sure. There's some musical cats, there's some musical cats out there. I love it. Yeah, this is a good, this is, cause my pics are gonna go with that for sure. I got one. There's some musical cats out there. I got a music heavy pic. Yeah. But yeah, you know, I did pack some, not as much as I would have.

It's, I feel like I'm backing myself into a corner where I'm gonna have to have like a 12 hour pack off. That's how you should do it. I think that's how it's gonna happen. Like I have all these extra days and it's just like, you know, I got just enough to not, you know what I mean? It just has to happen in a big, it has to be a thing.

You start throwing these in garbage bags at the end. Yes, exactly. You're like, at first they start off labeled and then there's one that has like a picture your c-path machine of priceless family heirloom and like oranges and that's like You just take one of those big-ass trash bags and put them over the clothes in the closet I was like well bedrooms done in the closet, I was like, well, bedroom's done. Yeah. Bedroom's done.

I had so much loose shit. The last time I packed, I was just, I brought out, when I left Portland to come to LA, I just put all my clothes on the hangers in the car. I didn't have much, so I just put all the clothes in the car. Oh man, yeah, I had those days, and now I've acquired a bunch of shit,

and honestly, overrated. Having stuff? Absolutely. Oh yeah. It's nice in the house, but when it comes to the move, not for me. Unless you can get completely new stuff every time you go somewhere, having stuff is awful. Oh, that'd be...

Right? Can you imagine you just torched everything when like starting over? It'd be great. That'd be great. That's how it used to be because, you know, nobody cared about those six sports illustrated that I Like a comb for some really, you know When they can't find you packing where can they find you cracking jokes Wow, okay now cracking jokes. Wow. Okay.

Come on now. August 23rd and 24th, I'm going to be at the Dallas Comedy Club in Dallas, Texas. I have some September, October dates, but I don't have them here. I'll do them next week. But yeah, come out back to Dallas. I love it. Everybody who comes is always so nice. I love that club.

I have such a fun time. I can't wait. And then, you know, come see us at the High Plains. That's right. Yes. That's right. Debra DiGiovanni is here. Wee.

What's the most right way to pronounce DiGiovanni? DiGiovanni? You know what, listen, listen to me. I just found out, okay, I have a, well, not new now, it's four years I've been with my partner now, and he's Italian. Like, he's a fush, he's Italian, Italian, speaks death, born, raised, lit, in it to Italy right now. All right, how do you wow?

full of time he um, he Has advised me that I've been pronouncing my name wrong my whole life. I'm sure you love hearing that Yeah, so my the G in my last name is capitalized. He doesn't understand why it's capitalized. Why is it capitalized? I don't know. You think it doesn't make any sense. So there's a little bit of that. There's a little bit like.

It's the D, right? You gotta have the lower E and the big G, right? You know what? I thought it was an I. The D usually means son of, right? The D-I means son of. So it's like Giovanni. So like technically my name is Johnson, right?

Di Giovanni. So Giovanni is John D's son. So I'm Debbie Johnson. Let's be honest. That's who I am. That's who I am. Basic bitch Debbie Johnson. Right here. I'm Debbie Johnson from Italy.

You gotta count Debbie Johnson. But listen, but then you say Deborah DiGiovanni, you're like, oh, who's this? Yeah. Oh, I knew it. Oh, you said Vanni a little bit. say Deborah DiGiovanni, you're like, oh, who's this? Yeah, I agree with it. Oh, you said Vanny a little bit. You said DiGiovanni, I heard a little bit. Yeah, see, when I'm doing Canadian, it's Deborah DiGiovanni. And then if my father is nearby, it's Deborah DiGiovanni. You know what I mean?

Whoa. Yeah. Man. That's like that scene in The Inglorious Basterds. Why do you want to hear like, they call it that. Like where you're like... Yeah, oh. I just want to hearious Basterds. Why do you want to hear like, the quote, like where you're like... Oh. I just want to hear the music.

I just recently watched that. It was so good. Anyway. What a film. What a film that is. What a film. I literally just watched it for the first time a couple months ago. Anyway.

It's debbendg on Instagram. Yeah. And that's D-E-B-R-A, you Luddites. I know. Why are we putting all those extra letters in there? Save yourself some time. Follow on Instagram. I don't know.

Yeah. I just did. I'm so bad at following, I'm so, like, I only follow, I'm so bad at following people on Instagram because I only really follow, like, sandwich accounts. And like, and like, That's what the platform's for, though. Dudes who show you how to wear pants right,

because that has been a struggle my entire 39 years on this planet. Where can people see you perform stand-up comedy or do anything? Right now, I go into Canada in September and I don't come back for a couple of months, because that's what happens when you go to Canada. But I'm doing like, I'm on like a private corporate tour

for like, yeah, for the entire month of September and October. So I'm out, he won't, yeah, I won't see me until like, maybe November, I know. I'm very lucky, but it's like, but then I'm doing a Texas week in November. So I'm, everybody, I'm in Dallas, I'm in Austin, where else am I, a couple places, but that'll be, it'll be always in my link tree.

You can always find it on Instagram, I post everything there. Follow on Instagram, go to the link tree. Yes. I don't often, I don't often do this sort of thing. You are so fucking funny. You are. You are. You are such a delight.

Thank you. Thank you very much. I just, I was, we were in Moon Tower together. I was telling you before we started recording and I was standing in the crowd watching you just absolutely crush and just like, it was one of those moments where you're like, I can't do that.

That's not like you. That's nice. Thank you very much. Where sometimes you watch a comedian and you're like, I could figure out how to be, I could like, you know what I mean, like I can do that kind of thing. And I was just watching you and I was just in awe.

You're so funny. If anybody isn't like a fan of yours already, they follow you and they're gonna be one real soon. Good, this is great. Yeah, thank you, Murph. Absolutely. We're drafting cat. Oh, my name's Ian Carmel,

at Ian Carmel on Twitter, Instagram, TikTok, YouTube, all of those platforms. Buy my book, T-Shirt Swim Club. It's a national bestseller. Soon to be international. Soon to be international bestseller. I'm calling the shot. If Deborah's Canadian fans can. Yes!

We sold a few copies in Canada during the Toronto show. Yeah. So check out that. Real proud of that book. I think you'll like it. And then outside of that, just come see us at High Plains Comedy Festival. And if you're a television executive, buy one of my scripts. Thank you.

That's it. That's all I have to promote. There it is. Good. We're drafting cats. And the way we determine the order of this draft. I love my scripts. Thank you, that's it, that's all I have to promote. There it is, good. We're drafting cats. And the way we determine the order of this draft. Well, Deborah, this is your idea to draft cats. Was there any, are you a cat, are you a friend of cats?

I'm a cat, I'm a very big cat person. I know, I was always like, you know, in Canada, I think people still consider me like the comedy was always about my cat. But that cat, God bless him, may he rest. He's been gone for years. Like he's been, my, Franklin Fonzarelli did Giovanni, and he passed, Fonzarelli, cause he's cool.

But he's, ah, but he passed away many years ago. He's been gone since 2014, and I don't have a new cat yet. And I... Send it to Valhalla. You don't have a new cat yet. I know, no. And I just like, I keep, I don't have a new cat yet. Send it to Valhalla. You don't have a new cat yet. No. No. And I just like, I keep... I don't know why. Like I feel like at first I wasn't ready for a new cat, but now I'm ready and now I'm just like, I gotta...

I don't know if I want two at once maybe. There's a lot. There's a lot. I'm a two cat. I feel like this, the next time should be two cats at once. They can keep each other. Yes They like to have someone that they can fight with and make trouble with and have a good time and you know, that's that's yeah It's a lot and I think but I only just I only worry about like traveling though. That's the issue. That's hard Away from a cat. I'd say a cat like maybe like

Maximum five days. Yeah, Cause you end up at five days, but you get them home and you're like, yikes, like they are, they're nuts. Three days is no problem. Three days is no problem. A weekend, you can do a weekend, but if you're stitching stuff together, then it starts to become difficult.

It can be a little hard. I mean, I'm about to be gone for three weeks and it's so much easier to get care for kitties than it is for like a dog. We just got someone to by a couple times a day and then we have someone stay in some nights just to give them some human contact. But it's really just feed them and you know, that's it.

Yeah. But that's the thing too. Yeah. Cats, you can't they can just have someone drop in and change stuff up and whatever. But I like them to have. I do. I know. Yeah.

I want them to. Yeah. Anyway, but this one, I was excited for cats. And then overnight, as I was making my list of cats, I was yeah, I want them to yeah Yeah, anyway, but this one I was excited for cats and then overnight as I was making my list of cats I was like, oh, I think I I think I made a huge mistake. So let's see how this goes my cup run I got so many cats You guys go real or fictional or a little bit of both or fictional or a little bit of both? A little bit of both. A lot of fictional. I profess that I'm not a cat person, so this is...

I don't know. It's your one flaw, in my opinion. And Ian watched him kill a guy one time. It's like when a model has a gap in their teeth. They're like, that kind of thing. It's the flaw that makes you even more beautiful. I mean, but it's also like, it's not like I'm not against them or anything. It just never happened We never had one growing up because we moved so much and then I just never

Just never happened. You're not anti cat. Oh, we're fine with that. I don't think I'm anti cat No, I'm a fool. I'm like cat-pilled as the kids say now. I'm like a fool. Is that the term? It's no what they say anything-pilled. You're whatever-pilled. Oh, dead-ass. If you like ice cream, they're like, I'm ice cream-pilled. And it's like, what the fuck do you have to say? Yeah, that's dead-ass, bro. You're right, that's dead-ass. Dead-ass, dude.

I feel like there's... I heard something about there being like a... People that really love cats and that really... That we have... There's something that we have. It... People that really love cats and that really... There's something that we have. It might be a slight mental illness, apparently. I'll buy that. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'll have to Google.

I didn't do the work on that. But I'll get back to you. You have to meet them on their level. A dog will. They're stoked to see anybody. They're happy to see you. Cats choose you. They choose you. You really gotta get in there and earn it. Yes, cats choose humans. They're like dragons.

Which kind of feels like stand-up comedy. They are, they are like. They're like, drag, see, this is why I'm out. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Dracarys.

Yeah. Yeah. Like, what the fuck are you talking about? Uh. What I would determine the order of today's draft is the relicking game of Rock Paper Scissors. Harris Term the order of today's draft is through a rollicking game of rock paper scissors play between the three of you and we throw On shoot here we go Rock paper scissors shoot. Oh Cat we threw cats we got to throw it again rock paper scissors shoot

We threw cats, we gotta throw it again. Rock, paper, scissors, shoot. Hey. Oh, Sean wins in a natural victory. It's the three way rock, paper, scissors. Somebody throws a unique item, they win. Sean throws a paper against two scissors. Sean, as the winner, it is incumbent upon you to determine the order of today's draft.

But before you do that, I will remind you, it is a serpentine draft. And what is that? That's a great question. My cat, a lot of times, will groom me. I'll just be sitting there and my cat will groom my arm. Bertie does it more than Betty. But what she'll do is she'll start, she'll find a section and she'll start grooming

from left to right and then she'll go up a tick. And then she'll groom from right to left and then up a tick and then left to right, up a tick, right to left. And I found out that when a cat is just licking you, I never knew that they're grooming you. That's what they're doing. I didn't know that.

I never knew why they were licking me. I thought it was like a salt thing, but Laura, my wife, is a zoologist, and she was saying that they're grooming you, so it's like a sign of affection. I didn't know that. I love it, I love it. She'll try to have sex with you later.

They're trying to have a groom. And then Bertie's lighting all these candles. She made me a nice New York strip. I don't know why. She put on the departed because she knows I liked it. She put on some Nickelback. That's your romantic evening. A nice New York strip with a departed.

You want to get laid from this guy? You put up, give me a steak and put on the departed. That would get you laid. It would. Four hours later. It would get you laid. Basically what it means is you pick fourth in the first round, you pick first in the second round. Now Sean, Sean, Sean, with that in mind, what will the order of today's draft be? I want to go first.

Oh, Sean's going first. I do. Rarely do I want that and then we'll go Deborah and then we'll go young David and then we'll go young Ian hot corner Hot corner on the back and five rounds 20 picks were drafting cats Sean Jordan you have the first pick right after the short break This show is sponsored by BetterHelp. Now, self-care, the most important, arguably the most important thing you can do. Your boy right now is up at the lake, been here for about a week. Self-care, baby.

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where you're gonna go. You get 15% off with code ALLFANTASY again at schedule35.co. That's 15% off at schedule35.co and use the promo code ALLFANTASY. Yeah we're back! Welcome back to ALLFANTASY and everything. The only podcast that has ever existed. This is it Thank you for joining us for drafting cats. Our guest today is Deborah DiGiovanni Stand-up comedian extraordinaire, but she does not have the first pick Sean Jordan fellow stand-up comedian extraordinaire does Sean what will that first cat off the board be? First cat on the list for me pop right in in the head, is MC Scat Cat.

No way. Yeah, first place. I thought you were gonna take her, I thought I could get it because you guys like real cats. I knew Scat Cat was going quick. I had, I had, I don't know, he's just such a rebel, he's so lovable, you know? He's out there, what's he doing?

He's out there smoking in the house, you know, all kinds of stuff. He's smoking, she takes it easy, he's out there. What's he doing? He's out there smoking in the house. You know, all kinds of stuff. He's smoking. She takes it easy. He gets obsessed. How much of this was you taking him because you knew David was going to take him later and that's why you went first?

I wanted him. I did want him. I wanted him on my list. I figured. Smells like weed to me. Feels like, Sean took ages ago, Sean who does not smoke weed drafted weed when David and I both smoked a lot of weed

and the things that smell good draft and it's haunted him ever since. I love and well documented, love the smell of marijuana. Love it. Well documented is a stretch. We weren't drafting, we weren't drafting drugs you don't like. We were drafting smells.

And I like the smell of weed. Marijuana, as it were. MC Scat Cat. MC Scat Cat likes the smell of cigs. MC Scat Cat is a cartoon cat that danced alongside Paula Abdul in the music video for her song Opposites Attract from 1989. Right on the heels of Who Framed Roger Rabbit. Also had his own album, partially written by Romany Malco. But I'll let the big MC Scat Cat fan tell you that.

I knew that. We talked about that before. I knew that. I don't know much else, but I did know that. But isn't that tight? That is cool. Is he still alive? Do you think? MC Scat Cat? Yeah, is he still with us? Is he? Slow down, though. I hope so. How did we get to go there? Do you think? MC's cat cat? Yeah, is he still with us? Is he slow down though?

I hope so. How did we get to go there? I mean he was living a night life, if you go from the song. I mean serious living horror. What was him in the stray mob? Yeah, that was a testimonial. He might not be with us anymore,

or he's in rough shape. Yeah, who's gonna say? Retired perhaps. Yeah, life is about memories, and he made a couple lifetimes full. He did. I bet he hooked up with Paula. Oh, for sure. Come on. Amelia was out of town that day.

Look at you with the references. I'm loving them. You went deep. He made it to number 80 on the US chart with his big song, Scat Strut, off of a solo album. He made it to number 80 on the US chart with his big song, Scat Strut, off of a solo album. He made it to number nine on the Norwegian charts. So they like, they focus scat cat more than we do in Norway. I'd focus on that more.

If I made it to 80, I don't know if I'd be telling, I'd be like, I'm on the charts. I don't know if I'd stay on. He made it to nine in Norway, baby. Yeah, I'd bring up the nine. He made it to number nine. Yeah, I've seen scat Cat, man. Suspenders, they just look cool. Easy going dude. I can't believe that's the first cat off the board.

In the long history of cats, both real and fictional, MC Scat Cat? I won't tell anyone from like ancient Egypt that I picked MC Scat Cat. I think they would be thrilled to see how far Cat got. I suppose they'd be like, we were right. They are the gods. All right, MC Scat Cat, the first cat off the board. Deborah, it is time for your first pick in the Cat's Draft. Okay, okay. Are you ready? My first pick is Nermal.

Oh, Nermal! Oh, you want to do Skat Cat? I want to do Nermal. If you do not know, for those listening, Nermal is Garfield's... What was it Garfield's, like... His adversary, right? He hated Nermal, right? Was it? Oh, I hated Nermal. The nemesis. But I can't remember nemesis, right?

But I can't remember the relationship. Was it a neighbor's cat? I thought John brought her home. John had both of them, from what I know. Wait, Nermal was in the house? Do you remember? Yes. Do you remember, though? I remember just looking, like, the cutest animation of a cat. Like, I was like...

I'm like, how can you make just a drawing of a cat that cute? It was so cute. Nermal. That's on my list of names too. He just visited. I'm gonna lay low because we all know how I feel about Garfield. Oh. All right.

It'll come up later. I'm sure it'll come up later. Okay. Sorry, sorry, sorry. Garfield was always trying to send Nermal to Abu Dhabi. Remember he looked like Nermal in a box? He's a dick. He's a hater.

Yes! Right? Nermal was a guest. He didn't live in the house. He's a hater. Right? Nermal was a guest. He didn't live in the house. No, yeah. No, absolutely. Totally supporting cast.

Totally supporting cast. Oh, I didn't know Nermal was a boy. I thought Nermal was a girl. I didn't know Nermal was a boy. No. Yeah, Nermal was a... Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah, she showed up every now and then. Yeah, every once in a while. Odie lived in the house, but we're not talking about dogs right now. So it's, you know what I mean? That's right. Nermal was just, she was a nemesi, nemesis, I guess, I don't know, past. Yeah, but cute as anything and hooray. Known as the self-proclaimed world's cutest kitten.

Self-proclaimed. Self-proclaimed. Self-proclaimed, though. It is kind of irritating. I get it, Garfield. Yeah, that's obnoxious. I'm like, oh, you said, you said you're coming to my house? Also, John would get all obsessed with her. Like, like, Nermal would walk through the door

and all of a sudden Garfield was old news. There was this like, you know, so I understand the animosity a little bit. I get it, I get it. What did John do? What, he had a job, right? Or was he on unemployment? Not have a girlfriend is is that what you said?

I can see him being on disability. I can see that. John Arbuckle. Did you just say Navy Seal? I said Navy Seal. He was on the service. That's amazing. That's amazing.

Why, my brain was like, wasn't he a cartoonist? I'm like, no, Debra, he was the cartoon. But that's no, okay. He, let me see if it says on the Garfield Wikipedia what is he just he said he was a nipa baby for sure I thought he did something with a typewriter He may be in tech. He would have a writer right his parents are farmers or at least farm owners weed I Always thought he worked in advertising. I see that works for me too. Oh

Yeah, something like that right I don't know why I assume that I could see that he's not selling Peep like he's not in the room like John Hamm, but he's you think he's like behind the scenes in advertising We don't know we don't know what he's like when he's not being like terrorized by he likes writing comics is he I know what? He's like at home. Oh, he writes comics. Maybe it says what that's what he's like when he's not being terrorized by, he likes writing comics? Is he a comic? Does he write comics? Oh, he writes comics. Maybe, that's what he likes. I don't know. The Garfield Wikipedia is one of these situations

where there's too much info. You know, it's one of those Wikipedias that makes my computer start humming when I go on it, because there's so much going on on the page. The Garfield Wikipedia? You've been there before? Like, I was just on it, and I had to close it out because my computer started humming. Your Acer started running hot.

Have I been there before? I printed off the whole Wiki. It's just. Oh yeah, you got to put a damp towel on top that. I didn't know his last name was Arbuckle until you said it. Then I. Oh yeah, John Arbuckle, baby. He's based on the comic creator Jim Davis.

So... He weighs 182 pounds. Too much info. All right. So it's like a Larry David, George Costanza type thing. Yeah. Yes. Oh, see, that's it, right? It's like a... Art imitating, like the imitating... Oh!

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. He's his avatar. Nervle going off the board first, not the big upset, not the first cat from even that universe we thought would go. What is it that you like about Nermal so much, Debra? She's so cute. She makes me crazy.

Like she's just, I can't like, there's some animations that like, like they make my brain stop, and Nermal was always one of them Do you remember also another one just as an aside? Do you ever did anyone ever see the movie tangled? Did you ever see that one? Yeah About the hair that little pavilion the chameleon entangled like I it makes me cry. It's so cute I don't know why just you know, there's certain things and just like that was normal. I just

Just fuck up that cat. I just fucking ate that cat. I just... I just saw Who Framed Roger Rabbit in theaters. They were playing it at the New Beverly. So my buddy and I went to go see it. And it's a cute, overly cute, not overly, but extremely cute animation with a shoe that Dr. Doom picks up and drops in the dip.

Makes me want to cry. And the shoe is so cute, and it's like coming up against his foot. It's like the perfect way to make this through the villain. He murders it. Yes. In cold blood for it. Fucking Christopher Lloyd, man. Christopher Lloyd.

Do you realize you're like not a kid, not a children's movie. I recently watched that as well and was like, damn, still so good. Still so good. It's a good movie. Oh yeah, anyway. David, it's time for good. Still so good. It's a good movie. Oh, yeah. Anyway.

David, it's time for your first pick. MC Scat Cat off the board. Yeah, I'm taking the second coolest cat, the first cat. I do feel like I feel like this cat. I'm taking Abraham DeLacy, Gio Seppichese, Thomas O'Malley the alley cat from Aristocats. Oh! Oh, from Aristocats. Oh, from the Aristocats.

Wow. Yeah. I love that. He was so cool. And then in the middle of the movie, he pivots and by the end he's a family man. At first, he was a street cat. He was having a good time. He likes to cheat, cheat, cheat your own.

He likes to make it home on own he likes to make you home Fish with the big backbone and then it's like everybody wants to be a cat and then by the end He's just like a dad. Oh God, it's a good arc. It's a good arc. It's a great arc and they must have had a meeting at Disney where they were like Okay, so this alley cat were sitting in New York. Do we make them Irish or Italian? We're like, okay, so this alley cat we're setting in New York. Do we make them Irish or Italian? Like after two three hours of like he did or Jewish or Jewish Abraham, right? To be a New York cat. He has to be a New York like tenement cat So we have to make them Italian Jewish or Irish and they have the three on the board and after three hours of debate Some guys stood up and said boys boys

What if he's all three? Yeah This fight to settle it much like they did in the writers rooms back then. That's right Delacy Giuseppe Casey Thomas O'Malley And I'm very proud of that. He's cool as hell, man. When she meets him, he's just walking down the beach. Bro, when she meets him, he's walking by the banks of a river singing his own song to himself. That's a cool guy.

The guy who played him was this dude, Phil Harris, who was an American actor, bandleader, entertainer, and singer from like the Jack Benny show Oh, it's like old show business whose birth name was wanga Philip Harris Curious Hats Wikipedia yeah, dude He just read the frame pictures on his wall right now.

I'm writing a dark, gritty reboot of Duchess. Wonga is a Cherokee name. That was his first name, so Wonga Philip Harris from Linton, Indiana. Oh, look at that. Didn't die until 1995, good for him. That's awesome. Yeah, Phil Harris. He was in Rock-A-Doodle.

Now I'm looking at stuff too. Which was a complicated movie. Yeah, man. Thomas O'Malley, the alley cat, he was the coolest. He was like, to me, as cool as MC Scat Cat. Absolutely. He was a hot dude cat. That cat was hot dude. I'm looking at like defined definition on my cat.

He was spitting game when he was talking to Duchess. He purred a little bit Come on man, what's not to love and then over throughout the experience of having cheese, you know what? He's not the dad, but he's the dad that stepped up You know what I mean? And that's great, too. That's a powerful dad. Yeah, he's a great guy. I mean, seriously. With my first pick, I gotta go, I gotta go with a character that embodies the mischief

inherent in the hearts of cats. I like a mischievous cat. I gotta go with, I gotta go, I gotta take one off the Mount Rushmore. I gotta go cat in the hat. Oh, wow. Like Mike Myers. Not, not necessarily the Mike Myers one, but why not the Mike Myers? I gotta take one off the Mount Rushmore. I gotta go cat in the hat. Oh Not necessarily the Mike Myers one, but why not the Mike?

Get them all yeah, you can I get all of them He did get those kids in trouble. He did get those kids. That's what I like Did he have a name? Just Cat in the Hat? It was just Cat in the Hat. I think it's just the Cat in the Hat. Once a week I read that book. In French, Chatshepot. In Spanish, El Gato in the Sombrero. Ah! El Gato in the Sombrero is hilarious.

At times where we went gatti in capelle, capelle? Gatti Capelli. Gatti Capelle. Gatti Capelle. I remember seeing one of the cat in the hat things whereas the song, it was like cat in the hat in French, cha cha po. In Spanish, el gato in a sombrero. That's a little bit of fun.

I do agree. Oh, just a little bit of fun. I love it. Yeah, that ain't bad. Yeah, the one drawback on the cat in the hat Although now looking back it wasn't a drawback is that there was a period in the 90s where dudes tried to wear that hat I feel like it was Stoners like teens in the early in their early 20s who were trying to pull off

that sort of like cat in the hat hat. Oh god. I feel like I remember you would get them at like the fair. Yeah. Well there were the two different strains of it. There was the. Right. You could also get them at like Metro Mix in Sioux Falls in the mall, like our cool store.

Yeah. Our cool store. You could, you could get that dumb shit. And like Blossom would wear, I mean I know, I know what you're talking about. Like the spin doctors, I'm saying they were. Dudes who did those sticks, the devil sticks, were wearing those hats. Oh my God, the devil sticks.

For sure, for sure, for sure. I had some devil sticks, I'm not even good, I wish I could pretend. I had some devil sticks. I absolutely had some devil sticks. One good, I could only do the basic one. I got them, I got them flipping a couple times. I could flip, but like, cause you had to do the, this is not,

this is a visual. Then if you drop them, you have to pick it up. And what an embarrassing situation that is. Picking up a devil stick? Well, also it's not more embarrassing than taking them out. It's kind of the least embarrassing. Buying them is probably pretty embarrassing too. Dropping them is like, at least I didn't spend

as much time on these as you think. Yeah. Um, got people watching you're like, why are you good at that? I'd rather take out five hacky sacks than one fucking devil sticks. Um, the cat in the hat. Oh my god, the cat in the cat. Yeah. He's just great.

That's your friend. That's your friend. Is it your friend? Well, I thought that was the lesson, right? Cause he fucked up the house. I don't remember the story though. I think he represents cats pretty well. I think he represents what lurks in the hearts of cats pretty well.

Yeah. Okay. There's affection in there, but also- Is he's trouble? Just a troublemaker. And then goes, affection in there, but also- He's trouble. He's trouble. Just a trouble maker. And then goes, what? Oh, oops.

I destroyed everything. Well, whatever. But what are you gonna do, punish a cat? They're like, it's not gonna take. Come on, it's what he knows. They're unpunishable. Unpunishable. So you ever try to yell, if you yell at the cat,

they just look at you. You yell at a dog, you get a reaction. If you yell at a cat, they're just like, bro, I don't care. Shut up. Yeah, they're almost like, if they could laugh at you, they would. They'd be like, Q. Are you yelling Q?

That got that vibe, you know what I mean? Q. Yeah. Cat in the Hat is my first pick. All right. And, okay, I'm gonna take, as you may or may not know, I worked for The Late Late Show with James Corden for nine years.

From the show's conception until the show's. Genesis, if you will. Until the show's peaceful surrender when we decided to take it off the air. In the middle of that run, my boss, my friend, former guest on this podcast, James Corden, accepted a role in the live action motion picture, Cats. For which he was, I would say,

a mixed critical response to that movie. For which he was I would say a mixed critical response to that movie He he played the role of the cat Bustopher Jones He's a gel ago cat he is a joke look oh yeah gel ago balls for gel ago cats and I'm drafting Bustopher Jones with my second pick cat's draft Saw that movie in hell on on Christmas. Yeah, that's a good time to see it. Yeah, that's when it came out.

I saw it on Christmas at City Walk. He's a bourgeois cat who boasts about his weight and he shares food scraps from the garbage, according to Wikipedia. And my wife just texted me to say the fact that I am leaving scrimble shanks on the... Skimble shanks? Skimble shanks the railway, skimble shanks?

Skimble shanks the railway cat on the table is embarrassing for the podcast. Will you please, will you text your wife back and say maybe he'll go in the next 16 picks? You can't take other cats from cats, dude. Go ahead. Tell me what his name is again, Sean. Yeah, say his name, Sean. I don't wanna do it yet.

If I choose him, I will say his name again. Sean, who wrote cats? I don't feel like I need to divulge your information. Andrew Lloyd Webber. No, I'm making a mistake. Am I right? Yeah, you're right. Oh yeah.

Ah! I was just about to say it. Oh yeah, I think it's Lord Lloyd. I think it, wait, is it? Yeah, I think it's Lord Lloyd Webber. I was gonna say Lloyd Banks. It's Lord Banks. It's Lord Lloyd. I think it, wait, is it? Yeah, I think it's Lord Lloyd Webber. I was gonna say Lloyd Banks. It's Lloyd Banks. It's Lloyd Banks.

Yes, and Lord Webber wrote Cats based on Old Possum's Book of Practical Cats by T.S. Eliot. That's Tom Sturn's Eliot there, Sean. Sure, I mean, I can't stop talking about books. I'll be honest, I have not seen Cats, but I have seen my boss's entire performance. We drafted musicals. I watched it the day before we drafted musicals. Did you really? Yeah.

Jellicle balls for Jellicle Cats. The way they decided to give to make the cats look was extremely disturbing. Interesting. But it's hard to blame anybody for getting involved in this movie because it's it's not just Gordon. It's Judi Dench, It's hard to blame anybody for getting involved in this movie because it's it's not just Gordon. It's Judy Dench Indra, so yeah, Jennifer, there's a bunch of people Taylor Swift, sir Ian McKellen and Jason Derulo, of course Sexual cat the wet sexual cat the wet sexual But I'm taking of all the vagelical Cats from Mr. Mistoffelees, Monka Strap, you know,

there's so many of them, Rum Tum Tugger, Skimbleshanks, I have to take Buster Per Jones. Because he's my boss. Neither Mungo Jerry or Rumple Teaser, but Buster Per Jones. David Borey, Time for your second pick. I'm taking the frenemy relationship. What? I thought we were all...

We're drafting... I think we're drafting specific cats. Oh, I thought we were just talking things about cats or specific cats. No, I think specific... I think we're taking fictional or real cats. Oh, okay. No, I think specific I think we're taking fictional or real cats. Oh Okay, right, I mean the frenemy relationship is it seems to be like the major thing about cats It's for sure the major thing about cats, but I think I thought we were driving specific cats My wrong. No, that's what I got down. Oh real or fictional cats All right. Well, then

Do you know Mufasa? Yeah Probably should have gone Oh, are we not going big cats? Little cat I got a cat that I would could take to no I got a ton of big cats on here Speaking of big cats. We were watching I I was homesick, like a week or two ago. And I had reached that point where I'm like, had watched everything. So I just went on Disney and I threw on like one of the, they have nature documentaries. Yeah.

And it was like one of these lions and cheetahs. It was like a big cat one. And my cat, Eddie, jumped up on to the like the table in front of the TV. Almost there, she watches like sports and that's the only thing she'll watch. But she got up there and watched all the cheetahs and the lions running around and was just like following around like, oh, that's me. That's me up there. Like she finally saw herself represented in media.

It was so cute. She was watching these big cats. See, this is what we need diversity. Yeah, exactly. I like the lion kittens with meow. She would like, you know what I mean? So cute, she was watching these big cats. See, this is why we need diversity. Yeah, exactly, it was like the lion kittens would meow, she would like, you know what I mean? She like, her ears would perk up, it was so cute. What do you think she thought was happening? I don't, I sometimes think about that.

I think she thinks it's like glass. It's in there though. Oh, you mean the teeth, I thought you meant what are the cats doing? You mean like, how am I seeing these cats? I get it. Yeah, I think a little bit of both. I thought you meant what are the cats doing? You mean like how am I seeing these cats, I get it. Yeah, I think a little bit of both. I think they know that lions are cats,

but I also wonder, it's like when that moves on the screen, are they like, they don't know from TV, right? I can't imagine. I always think that in the car too. It's like, what, of course they're fucking losing their mind. What do they think is happening? They're going so fast, they're in, I mean, it'd be insane.

Whenever you get in the car and you're like, we should shut up, and it's like, no, no I won't. I have no idea what's happening. Also, their entire, my cats are indoor cats, so their entire world is like the 1200 square feet of my house, and then all of a sudden you bring them outside and they're like, what the fuck? So many smells.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. You drive them by a Del Taco and they're like, what the fuck? So many smells. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You drive in by a Del Taco and they're like, what is that? We bring in bird feathers. So there's a place in Portland where there's like wild peacocks in the neighborhood. Oh, I know. There's a few places in Portland where there's wild peacocks. Well, there's one huge one.

My neighborhood where I grew up was full of them. It's insane. So they'll shed and those like three foot long peacock feathers, we'll just bring them into the house and the cats go bananas over those. It's like there's a peacock in the living room for a second. It's so cool. When I drop my luggage off after a road trip

and I just put it on and open it to start doing laundry, the cats will jump in there and they're doing a CSI. Like, where was he? They're creeping really slow and like smelling all this. They never smelled Pittsburgh before, now they have to smell Pittsburgh. They're like, what is this? Smells like Madison.

Hello. Hello. Mufasa, we're talking about Mufasa. Yeah. The best dude, the G. Yeah, what's to say, he was the best. He was a leader, had a deep voice. Yeah, James Earl Jones. Yeah. Yeah Kings

Yeah, by his brother that sucks One of the great one of the great kings in fiction, I think Mufasa It is. Yeah, the Disney he seems to have more of a personality than a lot of the other ones The Lion King based on Hamlet, right? Yeah He seems to have more of a personality than a lot of the other ones. The Lion King based on Hamlet, right? Yeah. Is that right? Oh my God, is it?

Yeah, something like that. Are they all based on some sort of, are they all rooted in some sort of play, like most of those movies, or is it just a few of them? The Little Mermaid is a book by Hans Christian Andersen. I think Beauty and the Beast is also a book. Pinocchio's of course a book, and like an Italian folktale. Yeah, I have a joke about it You have a Pajokeo about it

Joke pet oh he's gone He had to leave I don't know I like the joke here I Like that a lot Everyone your next cat we please name them, but joke you Yes, are you kidding me? Yes, that'd be great. Okay? We lost David oh he's back sorry I did it for the bit We lost David. Oh, he's back. Sorry. I did it for the bit Make sure I'm still recording a regular joke pedo over here. Come on, man. I got a three-star recording again Yeah, Mufasa fucking rules man, he's he brings terror to the hearts of uh hyenas everywhere Yeah, I mean what's the deep voice? He's out, he brings terror to the hearts of hyenas everywhere. Yeah, I mean, what's the deep voice?

He's just, you know, yeah, they only kill what they need. He explains the circle of life. Why didn't we ever get a Lion King ride? I don't know, that's a good question. We should have gotten a Lion King ride at some point in Disneyland. Well, it was like, it broke records, right? It was like the biggest. I think that was the movie that,

it was one of the ones that brought, it was like part of their new golden age. And we didn't get a Beauty and the Beast ride. We didn't get a Little Mermaid ride and we didn't get a Lion King ride. That thing was bizarre, right? Or an Aladdin ride. It's gotta be quite the endeavor to be like,

let's make a new ride. It's interesting what they land on. Like the mummy, that's still Knox by the way, if you go on the Mummy. It's still dope, but it's just like. They have a Mummy ride? Yeah, at Universal. Oh, Universal, okay. I'm just saying, like, whatever gets rides,

you know what I mean, but there's so much stuff. Well, now it's like there's a Star Wars, like there are new rides at Disneyland, there's like that Star Wars one, which is really good. But they opened that big Star Wars land. You would have thought we would have, maybe they just weren't doing IP rides back then. I guess they weren't.

They weren't? Not really, cause like. Wasn't like It's a Smile World? Yeah they were. But it was all Disney, right? It was all Disney stuff, but like the Pirates of the Caribbean was just like, we should do a pirates thing.

That wasn't like, they didn't made the movies later. That wasn't like a show. They did the movies because of that ride, right? Isn't that what spawned the movies? Splash Mountain was Song of the South. So that was like IP. And they did a, they have a Dumbo ride, but teacups wasn't anything.

You're sneaking in a lot of Disney knowledge over here. I didn't know any of this. I've seen a few times. I've been a few times in the last couple of years. I think California Adventure is like all Marvel and Pixar IP now. That's cause where you can drink, they want the Marvel and Pixar over there

where the alcohol is. It just seems, we should have gotten like a, like the will to be stampede. No, it seems like it would be a great ride. Yeah, or like a Timon and Pumbaa thing. Well, I'll make it happen. Yeah, I was gonna just make some calls. What are you doing?

I'm driving to Anaheim as soon as this podcast is over. I grew up in LA. Anaheim. Anaheim, bro. Debra, it's time for your second pick. Oh my God. Okay, here we go. Second pick, Boo Boo Kitty.

Who's Boo Boo Kitty? Oh, go with me, young boys. Listen, Days of Your, Laverne and Shirley, my favorite show ever in the world, was really the reason I wanted to be a comedian because I love Laverne and Shirley so much. And Shirley was the roommate, you know, the two of them, Laverne was bawdy, right? She was, you know, and then Shirley... She had her name on her clothes.

Yeah, right? She was the Elle, the coconut, the milk and Pepsi drink. She was great. But then Shirley, her rent was a little prim and proper. And she slept with a stuffed animal that was called Boo Boo Kitty. And Boo Boo Kitty was a part of that show. Big, a big stuffed animal, like a big, like a tall one. And she just, she spoke to it in a voice.

It was a guest star. It was a guest star. It had a bow. Yeah. Boo Boo Kitty. And he put a ball around its neck and it was just, and it was a running joke about booboo kitty. And I loved that guy. I loved that show. And yeah. It's a bigger stuffed animal than you think. It's a bee.

It's huge. It's huge. It's really like, it's tall. I completely miss Laverne and Shirley. It's set in Milwaukee, right? Set in Milwaukee. It's really like it's tall. I completely miss Laverne and Shirley. It's set in Milwaukee, right? Set in Milwaukee. We're gonna do it.

It was, that was... Oh my God. That is like... That is like... Yeah, give us every chance we'll take it. Yeah, her glues her gloves, she puts on the bottle. Bye, wave to it. Listen, the Lenny and Squiggy portion of that show is like...

From upstairs? It's like... Ugh. It is one of those shows that I watched as a young person, right, like as a kid, and loved it. But then you go back and watch it, and Lenny and Squiggy, like the jokes of Lenny and Squiggy, you get them now. You didn't get them as kids, you know what I mean?

It's like, just classic, just Michael McKean, oh my God. Just upstairs. Oh yeah. That might be like one of those, let me start that from the beginning. I did that with Cheers and Frasier in the last year or two. I mean, Lenny and Squiggy, Leonard Squigmon, Andrew, Andrew Squigmon and Lenny Konowski

and his last name meant help. There's a hog in my kitchen. And it's just like, it's just such a good show. It didn't make any sense to me at all. It made no sense and it's beautiful. It's just, just everything they said, whenever they said something Such a good show. It didn't make any sense to me at all. It made no sense and it's beautiful. It's just, just everything they said, whenever they said something disgusting on the show, they would show up. They'd be like, I'd rather die.

And they'd go, hello. And then walk in. Every time you said something disgusting, hello. And they were just, just ridiculous. Just fantastic. Carmine Ragusa, get out of here. The big ragoo. The big ragoo?

Oh, that's where the Big Ragoo is from. The Big Ragoo. Yes. My first exposure to Laverne and Shirley was the Wayne's World when they like parodied it. Yeah. Oh, yeah, yeah. Shamil. Shamazel.

Hassan Feffer corporate. Da da da da da da. Get a chance. Okay, sir. It was literally my, literally, still is one of my all-time favorite shows. I mean... I'm going in.

I'm putting it on the list. Yeah, you should go in. You should go in. I'd love to hear what you think about it. But that was like... Because she was such a character. I loved Shirley so much. She was such a character.

And I just remember the very distinctly one episode where they'd gone to a fancy lingerie shop and Shirley had bought herself something called the Hubba Hubba Hiney. So it was a fake butt that she put into her pants. If you don't have a Hiney, get the Hubba Hubba Hiney. And she was like, she was putting Boo Boo Kit into bed. And she had the Hubba Hubba Hiney. It's the things that stay.

You know what I mean? It's just the moments in your life. The original BBL. You know what I mean? It's 100%. 100 stay. You know what I mean? It's just the moments in your life. The original BBL. This is... 100%. 100%. The Triple H. Shame to put it on in the morning, take it off. And before the Kardashians.

Way before the Kardashians. But it is this. So, Boo Boo Kitty. Boo Boo Kitty, excellent pick. Sean Jordan, time for your next two picks, as it is a serpentine raft. Uh, I'm gonna go Stimpy. Oh He was a cat I believe it was a Yeah, yeah cat is that what I was to be Jay cat or my am I making that up?

I didn't want to Google it. Oh that one. I'm not totally sure. I'm not sure I hated them Stimpson Jake so did I Sam said Jake they were too gross for me. I, same. They grossed me out. I'm 42. I don't know if I won't speak to anyone, but I'm 42. And right when random is empty, I was probably not nine, 10. I don't know. I was right there where I was like, this is, it might as well have been X-rated to me at that age.

I was like, I can't believe I get to watch this. Cause they're like, their eyes are bloodshot. They're saying nipple, like, you know, these rubber nipples. I was like, holy buckets, these guys are lunatic. They always like zoom in on stuff real, like they'd zoom in on their eyeballs. They had a zimper's hair. And they would do that still,

and there would be like boils and like a dead bug. It was so funny. It was gross, but I loved it. Stimpy would eat too many hamburgers or something, and then yeah, he'd bark and they'd do a still of it, and it's or like Ren would get his teeth knocked out with a brick or something And you're like, whoa, what was your accent? Where was rich? You eat that was him right? Maybe I don't know. Yeah, I don't know What would you say Hungarian? I don't know boy. That was there was pork

Hoek yeah, Ren hook It's Hungarian close His last name was Hawk. H-O-E-K. Yeah, Wren Hawk. Is Hungarian close? He's an asthma hound Chihuahua. Oh. He's a, Martin Dr. Toon Goodman of Animation World Magazine described Wren as a scrawny, dyspeptic, and violently psychotic who loses his mind occasionally in a cumulative process

resulting in him becoming, in Goodman's words, a screaming klaxon, neon pink eyes dilating into twin nove inches above his jagged monolithic teeth. Wow. Must've had the thesaurus on that one there, Dr. Toon. They don't say. You have to when you're Toon Doctor,

nobody takes you serious. Uh-uh. Really, Gilded-in-the-Lily, fucking, they don't say. You have to when you're a tune doctor. Nobody takes you serious. Uh-uh. Really, Gilded Nalili, fucking, they don't say where he's from. But Eastern European seems right. That's what I thought. I swear to God, I didn't even know there were animals. Stimpy can kind of roll with the punches, got a good attitude, always stays positive.

He always talked Ren off the ledge. So, you know, he's just a good dude. It's that classic comic archetype of the little mean guy and the big dumb sweetie that goes back, probably like of Mice and Men maybe? I was just gonna say, I think of Mice and Men is probably the big guy. Yeah, I was gonna say that too, for sure, for sure.

All of us, we read. Especially John. Lemmy. Lenny. Lemmy Killmeister. Yes, Lemmy, yeah. Tell me about the rabbits. Yeahny. Lenny. Lemmy Kilmeister. Yes, Lemmy. Tell me about the rabbits.

Oh my God. We're not talking about the guy from Motorhead. We're talking about. George. George. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not.

So yeah. Yeah. Stimpy and then. Stimpson J.Kat. Yeah, Stimpson J.Kat. And then for my third pick, I am gonna go. Stimpy is the, hold on just real quick, a three-year-old, mildly overweight,

red and white Manx cat. Oh, L.A. There you have it. Sorry, go ahead. I just found more information. I found more information about Stimpy. It's always, usually a sort of funny bit when someone says something and I say,

don't tell me what to do But that one was glossed over so I sounded like a prick and it mean to So nobody I hope nobody took me seriously I'm glad you could see this Deborah. This is how he is all the time. It's the real Sorry to interrupt Sean go ahead as that's alright buddy, I appreciate it. You're handsome, so this is great. I'm gonna pick Tony the Tiger, another big cat. I like me a Tony the Tiger, another positive role model. He's healthy.

Yeah, he's great. A corporate pitch man selling us a corn sugar laden. It's all part of the complete breakfast, but. A shill for big cereal, dude. That's who you're taking. Listen, he saw Wheaties and he was like. I just forgot what his cereal was though. Frosted flakes.

He saw Wheaties and he's like, let's make these not fucking blow and put some sugar on them. Animate it a little bit. Get Michael Jordan out of here. Put a handkerchief on me and I will sell it. I feel like if you put Tony the Tiger in some football pads, that guy could start at linebacker for four years. Oh, he's barrel chested.

He is, for sure, for sure. He's built, dude. My man was stacked. Yes. Also, he's Italian. He's Italian. Tony! For sure, for sure. Absolutely, Tony Tigarelli?

He's got a body like Tom Cruise, do you know what I mean? Where it's like just all chest, all ribcage. I bet he can run really fast. Tom Cruise does have a big rib cage. He does? I've said this on- He does, he looks, oh yeah.

I think I've told this story on this podcast before, but when I was on the Late Late Show, we were filming with Tom Cruise on a boat on the River Thames in London. And he wore a suede button-up for some reason When I was on the Late Late Show, we were filming with Tom Cruise on a boat on the River Thames in London. And he wore a suede button-up for some reason. On the water? On the water.

It was summer. It was June. June could go either way in London, but it was warm and a little bit humid. So he was sweating through his suede shirt again. And he didn't have two of them because there aren't two suede shirts. There's one and he was wearing it. And he had to take it off and we had to like air dry it. And I got to see Tom Cruise just standing there shirtless and Deborah, you're 100% right.

Dude's torso built like Tony the Tiger. Big rib cage. Big old rib cage. He looks like he wants to rip his shirt off and wrestle all the time. Do you know what I mean? I feel like he's had extra lungs shirt off and wrestle all the time. Do you know what I mean?

Like you've got that vibe. I feel like he's had extra lungs, I think he's had extra lungs put in there. Put in there, I think so. Just a couple little extras on top. Can I go into 24 and be like, I want my rib cage to be bigger. I want a more substantial rib cage.

I think if you pull up his guy, I bet. Avocado and raw cashews. Yes. Let me see here. What do we do? If you call up his guy, I bet. Avocado and raw cashews. Get it? Let me see here. Tony the Tiger. 1952 Eugene Kolke, an accomplished graphics artist and art director at Leo Burnett created a character that was to become the official mascot

of Kellogg's New Breakfast Cereal. A tiger named Tony. Named after an ad man at Leo Burnett, Raymond Anthony Wells. Maybe not a Italian. An ad man. Yeah, they call me the tiger, so just animate that kid. The serial had other mascots like Katie the kangaroo,

Elmo the elephant, and Newt the gnu. Oh, sorry, dad didn't catch on at all. Tony saw two at the theater and got rehired. You can't put a tiger in with a kangaroo, an elephant, and a newt? No way. Come on. No. He has a son, Tony Jr.?

Yeah. What? That we know of. He's got at least one son. Is it like Scrappy Doo? He's got a Scrappy Doo. You know who voiced Tony the Tiger? Oh yeah, I hated Scrappy Doo.

Who? Was it Thorough Ravenscroft? It was Thorough Ravenscroft. Was it really? Oh yeah. I don't know how I knew that, but I knew that. That was a crazy full jawn. Yeah Thorough Ravens croft is the one Deborah who's saying you're a mean one. Mr. Grinch. Oh my god

Yeah, back when a name was a name. God damn it That's fantastic What a what a oh If your name is thorough yet something if your last name is Ravens crop, that's something to combine the two I love that. Thirl, dude. Thirl. What a, what a. Oh. If your name is Thirl, that's something. If your last name is Ravenscroft, that's something to combine the two. Ugh. I mean.

And by the way, I do like Tony the Tiger. I want to know. I am not anti-Tony. Oh yeah, me too. I like Tony. I don't love him. I don't love him. I'm not gonna lie.

Is it the handkerchief? I find him aggressive. Yeah. Yeah. I love that he played hockey. He's an athletic tiger. He played it find him aggressive. Yeah, yeah. I love that he played hockey. He's an athletic tiger. He played it all, yeah. Yeah, absolutely. Because he was always showing up at practice.

Like you guys just practice sports, but you know what you need? Milk and sugar. Sugar! Just all the other hockey players. Knocked out some sugar, yay! He looks so good at hockey because everyone else is skating around

with their stomachs full of milky sugar sloshing around. Like a half full fucking like boda bag Deborah time for your third pick. Oh my god. Okay, we're getting down now. I'm scared. We're getting to the okay Yeah, I'm gonna go classic and just be Morris do you remember Morris? I remember Morris. I remember Morris was like remember Morris. Morris was like, Morris, I don't even know what, Morris, was he for cat food? Yeah. I think he was the cat food. Nine lives, right?

Yes. Nine lives. But then he sort of became like a celebrity. All he was like old. It was, he was, yeah, he lived a really long life. I remember after Morris. He was always bigger than the the... He was always... Bigger than the cat food.

Sorry, go ahead. Oh yeah, oh god, yeah, yeah. But they also like they... Like after he passed away, like I remember them auditioning to have the new Morris. And then there was so much of like a backlash that people were like, no, don't bother. And then they just were like, okay. And then just stop with their, you know, their spokes cat who'd been with him for like whatever, 20 years, God bless. And they're like, okay, well, no more Morris.

Morris was classic orange cat. The world's most finicky cat. Oh, yes. Yeah. And just the face. So he had that face of like, just no, just no personality, tons of personality without doing anything, just not, you know, not giving anything, not giving anything. He was one of those. Yeah. One of those cats of like, of like I don't care if you never die like that's who he was You're embarrassing yourself. You're there That was his vibe. Yeah, he ran for pre-he ran for they ran him for president in 1988

Oh my god my vote would have gotten my vote Who's he running against Reagan? He would would have been against H.W. Bush. Oh, okay. Now that would have been a different scenario. A whole different world we'd have, a whole different world. He, a large orange tabby cat, the character of Morris the Cat,

is the world's most finicky cat. He was discovered in 1968 at the Hinsdale Humane Society in Chicago by professional animal handler Bob Martwick. Oh. And then he worked hand in hand with the Leo Burn Bob Martwick. Oh. And then he worked hand in hand with the Leo Burnett Advertising Company. What the hell?

Where Martwick worked. Morris was featured in 58 television commercials, which aired from 69 to 78. So that was the first Morris, and then he died in 78 of old age. Nice long life for a cat. Yeah, Soros is, let's be honest, he was in Hollywood for a long time. Sorosa's of the liver. Well, he was in Chicago, even worse.

Oh, God. Oh, my God. Two other cats subsequently played Morris. Two other did Morris? Yeah. Did they try to ambivous or were they the same looking cat? Ah-ha-ha! What did they do? Just gonna do the soap opera.

The role of Morris will now be played by... Do we look out on soap operas? They didn't even give a fuck. Soap operas didn't even give you a second. They were just like, new guy on screen. All right. So voiceover. Morris the Cat made his debut in Robert Altman's

The Long Goodbye with Elliot Gould and starred in the movie Seamus with Burt Reynolds and Diane Cannon. It worked! Stop it! This cat worked! All right. My God. And you were nervous. Come on.

He had authored three books. Exactly. He wrote three books, The Morris Approach, The Morris Method, and The Morris Prescription. I wonder what the prescription is. He wrote three books. What?

He was quoted at the 1993 end of the year edition of People Magazine, which noted deaths of 1993, to which he quoted a simple meow in honor of the death of his friend, Spud's Mackenzie. Aw. Wow. I wish that wasn't so, what a cute death situation. Okay, so Morris was powerful.

Morris was a Hollywood power player. Oh yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, we don't fuck around. Good pick. Nice. Didn't Morris date, dated Audrey Hepburn for a while, didn't he? Catherine. pick. Nice. Didn't Morris date, dated Audrey Hepburn for a while, did he?

Catherine. Catherine. Catherine Hepburn. And they always joke, look at us two cats making it in this crazy town. Oh my God. Morris the cat. David, time for your third pick. Ah, can I take Hobbs?

Fuck! Damn it. Come on, man. Damn it. Oh my God. Can I take hops? Fuck! Damn it! Oh my god, how did I forget about him? I love hops! What if it's just like, no I want to? He was so great. And I mean, I liked them all. The days are just packed.

Something under the bed is drooling. Homicidal Jungle Cat, right? Was the one. Yeah. Uh, the essential. I had like six or seven of them. He's so funny. He was so funny. So it was funny that he would scare Calvin at the door all the time. He was talk about like, is he friend or foe? Cause he would kind of just be like say like yeah This is a stupid idea and then let him do this. It was like, ah man that guy I love that guy one of the great I mean on it like not to sound hyperbolic but like one of the great

American works Cabin and Hobbes. Yeah. Yeah, it's like so funny cuz I loved it as a kid Yeah, and then as you get older you come back to him cuz like I said I had those were like my the few book fair books I would get I would always get same yeah well not one of the few but I always got those too yeah yeah yeah but like yeah man I fucking just I read he was so cool he was so cool it hit Kevin was a little psycho. Yeah. Yeah, a little. Well, look at him. Now he's out here peeing on fucking everybody,

from Hunter Biden to the Chevrolet logo. He was so mean to Susie. Like, they were just, the whole world was so fun. His parents were fun. Like, but Hobbs is just, he was hilarious. He was awesome. I remember like laughing aloud at that, like reading and laughing at like a

cartoon. Yeah. When they would go into like amazing artwork and like one of them, you know, like they just the perfect work about like childhood and imagination. And it bats a thousand when you're a kid and it bats somehow 2000 when you're like an adult, you know, like, and you're like, Oh shit, he was really getting into it here. Yeah. Yeah. Just like, and now the, um now the artist just retired it too.

Phil Watterson. Yeah, he didn't pass away. He just was like, and I feel like I remember him retiring, Calvin, in like, you know, not too, too long ago. I mean, it was probably 25 years, but my brain feels like. Like mid-90s, right, was when they ended it? Yeah, yeah. He was when they ended it. Yeah. Yeah, you never Really? Merchandised it you and like no you never there's never been like the movies or anything like that

And you know like no is back on fucking brings traffic. Yeah, you know like Fucking like what has been like I hope he's super super rich. I hope he's really rich He's gotten some regardless some money can't buy Good integrity. Oh, I love that one. Oh That's a good one Dave I'm sad that I miss that he's only 66 1958 Fucking crazy What so he retired like in his like 50 He was born in 1958. He's younger than our parents. That's fucking crazy.

What? So he retired like in his like fifth, no. Good job. Good for him. Why not? He was writing that in his 30s. Oh my God, he retired in his 40s. I love him. Oh my God. Oh my God.

Wow. No, he retired in his 30s. He retired in his 30s. He was 38 when he retired, huh? Cheese and rice. That's amazing. Oh, I love him. I've obsessed with this now. I like it even more. I think I'm gonna go back and buy the Oh my god, I like it even more. That is great. I got them. It's there's a beautiful like collection of them, too. Of all of them? Yeah. Yeah, you can get them hard band or soft band. I also got the hard side. It's funny they're not on your literature wall behind you.

Funny. Oh, yeah. See how many literature walls I have in this house? Especially now that my wife and these shelves put in our bedroom. Ah ha ha ha ha. This house has nothing but literature walls. There's literally. I love it. One.

There's literature. Two, three, four, five. There are six literature walls in this house. I love it. And then. We got the one. And then a couple boxes in the garage. This literature walls in this house. I love it. And then. We got the one. And then a couple boxes in the garage.

This is a book ass house. A book ass house. It's a book ass house. Excellent pick, David. Frustratingly excellent. Yeah, good one. Yeah, good one. Good one.

Yeah. Hobbs. Okay. Just spit. I'll take them. I'm taking Garfield. Sure. Just spit. I'll take him. I'm taking Garfield. Sure. Yeah, I don't.

As you should. Sure. Yeah. Dave is the only one that doesn't like him. I think Garfield's a great thing. Yeah, I like Garfield. I loved Garfield. He was my first favorite.

That was. He's so funny. All the books. Oh my God. I loved him so much. He is funny. I love the cartoon. Those long books.

Hates Mondays. Loves lasagna. Yeah, those long books. Hates Mondays, loves lasagna. Yeah, those long books. Yeah. Just kind of a grump. Why do you hate Mondays when you don't have a fucking job? He hates Mondays because that's when Jim goes to work. Yeah, right, he hates Jim.

He's addicted to John. He's complicated. Who among us hasn't pushed away the ones we love? He makes John make him lasagna? Listen, man. I don't know if he's making... I'm not eating lasagna unless I love the person who made it. I think it's a co-dependence issue.

I think John enjoys making lasagna, even though it might seem like he doesn't. They feed off each other. Symbiotic relationship. All right. Locks him ruthlessly the few times he dares bring a date home. Yeah, because he doesn't want to split, he doesn't want to spoil his attention.

No, yes, he likes to be, he likes to be the star of the house, absolutely. Yeah, he's afraid he's gonna lose him. He's gonna lose him. That's toxic. Well, that's what it's taught. It's real is what it is. Yeah. That's the problem with this is real. Slice of life in that book. No, I don't like you.

Hobbs is out here living, Hobbs isn't even a real cat. He's in a, he's a work of fiction in a child's imagination. and that's why everything's all hunky-dory, meanwhile Garfield's out here tackling what it's really like to be a man in a modern world. Garfield is the problem. You remove him from that situation. Garfield, he's the problem.

You take him out of that, they're living good in there. Odin's eating his self-esteem, jumps up 20 points. Relationship for sure. Yeah, man. Nermal's not getting shit too. Funny guy, funny guy. He's a funny guy, he's a funny guy. Yeah, voiced by...

Watched the shit out of that cartoon as a kid. Dude, US Acres too? Yeah, so funny. Even the Abu Dhabi song, I was thinking of when you were saying. Abu Dhabi, that's where you'll be. Anyone ever catch one of the movies? I never saw one. I never did.

I never watched anything. I never watched any movies at all. Cause that's where I drew the line there. That's where I was like, no, I'm not going. Cause it's like, it's animated, right? Also then eventually I was voiced by Chris Pratt in one of the later ones, which, and I think I'm a, higher on Chris Pratt and one of the later ones which and I am a I think I'm a Higher on Chris Pratt than most people are

Higher wait, I like Chris Pratt. Oh you do. I thought you didn't like Chris Pratt. No, I do like Chris Pratt Okay, I think he's made some weird decisions in his career that I don't agree. I think like He should have followed the Kurt Russell playbook. maybe a little closer rather than going so hard action in the way he did in like those Jurassic World movies could have been better, but there were no jokes. There was no humor. He's funny. He's just such a funny person. He's so funny. Yeah, I was gonna say.

It's just because he just started off on the show. He was so good. So good. On Once Upon a Time. Parks and Rec. I mean, he was so funny. Just Just yeah, I just feel like that. Yeah You should have I mean I I don't I don't feel I feel like I started just like him like I feel like he started Bringing God into things. Is that just me?

In his personal life. Yeah, I mean God bless. Well, but I'm not interested. Right. I don't want to feel like coming through the performance He went a little but like you know what? If he's more conservative than me or more religious than me like whatever, but like yeah, I just feel like he's picked weird Not the right roles that fit into what his strengths are I feel like he's run away from that His muscles wreck the humor, but he's still so he's still so funny I can go to him and he's so good in those like Guardians of the Galaxy movies He just needs to keep some of that energy with him all the time. And he just like, I think, abandoned it in a lot of these.

I think... I think after he left Ana, something changed. Something changed for... Yeah, don't you feel like they were super funny? There was a way that couple that was like, whenever they were on something, they were ridiculously charming. And like their chemistry was super good. And then when he left and whoever,

is he married to a Schwarzenegger? No. Schwarzenegger. And that's a Kennedy. Yeah, so it's like, yeah, Kennedy, exactly. So it's like, I don't know, I don't know. I feel like he sort of some of his, I lost some of my love for him there.

But anyway. I have this, I have Chris Pratt stock that I'm holding onto. And I do think it's, I think it's gonna swing back around at some point and we're gonna get some fun Chris Pratt stock that I'm holding on to and I do think it's I think it's gonna swing back around at some point and we're gonna get Some fun Chris Pratt rolls. I hope I'm right good because it's an energy that's like missing too. He's just a fuck he can be like a Red meat fucking fun like great American action star if he chooses to do it

but those always from Schwarzenegger to Kurt Russell to But those always from Schwarzenegger to Kurt Russell to maybe less Stallone, actually not really Stallone, but like a lot of those dudes have so much comedy in them and like charm and everything and he's got that gear. Anyway, enough about Chris Pratt, I drafted Garfield. With my fourth pick, I gotta go to the 100 Acre Woods. I'm taking Tigger. Oh, okay, yeah.

Oh! He's the only one. Oh, damn good one. Not my favorite member the only one. Oh, damn good one. Not my favorite member, resident of the Hundred Acre Woods. I'm an Eeyore man from childhood. Loved Eeyore. 100%. Yep.

I still appreciate Tigger's energy bouncing in the face of all that depression and confusion. A font of unburdened joy and energy. And the wonderful thing about Tiggers is that Tiggers are wonderful things, you know? Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. I had the shirt on. You gotta be, if you don't hype yourself, who will?

Exactly. Yes. And he's hyping up everybody else too. He's got everybody's back. He's infectious. Yes. Can't hope that he be in a good mood. Yeah, I really, I really enjoy.

He was voiced by that Paul Winchell guy who was so good. Who do you know, they're doing the Tigger voice like that. Did I get close? Who else did he do though? Do we know? I feel like he did more than one voice though. He for sure did. He was like, uh.

Yeah, for sure, right? Cause I feel like that, the cadence of his voice, I feel like I recognize that. He was Dick Dastardly in Hanna Barbera. He did Gargamel on the Smurfs. He did Tigger did? Yeah. The same dude. That's pretty sick.

Gargamel is such a fun name. Yeah, Gargamel. Super fun. Gargamel. He was in the show Gummy Bears. Yeah, he did a the show gummy bears Yeah Everywhere um I just enjoy as a kid I had to get if somebody from the world of Winnie the Pooh

My my most treasured book series as a kid is available. I got a yeah, I'm gonna take that's a nice representation Good one. I like take a jumping around and yeah time David we're gonna get to you or fourth pick but first we're gonna take another very short break Yeah, that's a nice representation. Good one. Like bigger jumping around in the time. David, we're going to get to your fourth pick, but first we're going to take another very short break. This episode of all fantasy, everything is brought to you by policy genius policy genius. I'm going to hit you. We're going to talk about some life insurance stuff real quick. Now, 40% of people with life insurance wish they'd gotten their policy to younger

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I think fourth. I take him also very cat feeling, but like he feels like a cool cat, like a friend. I'm taking Chester Cheeto. Oh, that's a good one. Yeah. Oh, come on. Hey, did you want some Cheetos? Always felt like you were selling weed in those commercials. Totally. 100%.

Yep. Something a little harder in some of the printouts. Hey, I got a bunch of Cheetos in last week. Why are you wearing a... You want to be cool at school? Come to the bathroom with Chester. Why are you wearing a leather jacket? Yeah. Why aren't you?

Why is your nose running? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It was all powder, powder everywhere. Yay. Yeah. Jaw's going all hard.

Yeah. They were, Leo and, I assume it was by Leo and Burnett. We have to assume at this point, everything was Leo Burnett. The masters of cats and advertising. Let me find out. But they were really, like, they knew their audience though, didn't they? Like that was just like, okay, here's what we're gonna do.

I mean, that is. Oh, it was for sure. Grab an eight ball of flaming hot Cheetos. Yes. Chester Cheetos' original mascot was the Cheetos Mouse, who debuted, which makes sense. Cheese mice, it makes sense, cheese mice, it makes sense.

Which he debuted in 1971 and disappeared around 79. In 1980, so then Cheetos went without a mascot until 1986, when Chester Cheetah was created by Brad Morgan, who redirected the commercials. Right around the time Scarface came out. That's right, he was in house. He was in house at Cheetos. Yeah, a little bit after the age of Barnett.

But. Am I wrong? He's kind of grown with the times too, right? Like didn't they define, didn't they give him some muscles and shit? Yeah, now he sells Molly, he's pie, he has purple fur. What do you mean age with the times? He's like a real Coachella vibe.

Yeah. What do you mean the age with the times? I was just trying to pull another riff out. No, they like they made his upper body more defined. Like, didn't they update his animation a little bit? Like now if you look up Chester Cheeto, isn't he like, you know what I mean? He's still a key player. Chester Cheeto. Wasn't he like a super skinny guy before?

I think he was a junk addict. He was super skinny and he wore sneakers. Sunglasses. He was a junk addict. He was a junk addict. He was a junk addict. He was a junk addict. He was a junk addict. He was a skinny. Wasn't he like a super skinny guy before? He was a junkhead. He was super skinny and he wore sneakers. Sunglasses.

They look skinny to me. Yeah, sunglasses. Really, okay. He's got a little punch now at least. Oh bless. There we go. Yeah. Metabolism stopped working.

Trying to sell me Cheetos? You don't have a little punch? You gotta, exactly. That's a good one, man. He, yeah, wears a lot of stuff. There was a video game wasn't there Was there a Chester cheetah video game? I don't know. Oh my gosh like for Sega I remember the noise the noise had a video game. There were multiple Chester cheetah video games. Oh my god You cool the fool on the on Sega and Super Nintendo and then Wild Wild Quest

Also on Super Nintendo and Sega Wow, I love that shit. Why not man? I wonder how many they sold Let me see they might have been from here Doesn't say they were they real mediocre ratings, both of them. I can't imagine they were good. They were doing that. Some of those weird video games where you're like, what the fuck were you doing?

They were platformers. Oh, the first one actually got an 82% on Electronic Amps. So not so bad. And EGM gave it a 31 out of 40. You know, that classic out of 40 grading scale. Yeah. Deborah, time for your fourth pick. Oh my God. Okay. We're just going to throw down cause I feel like I'm bottom of the barrel now.

I'm at Sylvester. Let's just throw it out. Oh yeah. Sure. Hey, nothing wrong with Sylvester. Oh no, Sylvester in the tweet. Although I will say this to you, nothing wrong with Sylvester. He was not my favorite of the cats. Right.

Just because, you know what I mean? Like he, like I felt like he was, I want to say he was slightly unlikable. I mean, talking about an animated cat. But there was, I was rooting for Tweety. You know what I mean? Yeah. Yeah, for sure. Some of that was kind of annoying. Some of that was a little like, you know what I mean? I just was never, we were never rooting for him. I don't know if it was the lisp. I would never make fun of someone with a speech impediment, but there was something about him.

He would have been wet. Do you know what I mean? Like talking to him would have been a lot of like, yikes, would have been a lot of, you know what I mean? Yeah, if he says, you gotta get the umbrella out of he's saying suffer and thuff again. You gotta do like a COVID plastic. Remember those?

Face masks, COVID, remember? Sorry, you're like, At the remember? Sorry, you're like... At the doctor's office, you're like, what do I have? I don't know if I have anything yet. Why are you covering up like that? It's like, is this contagion? What are we doing right now? Yeah, yeah, yeah. He was voiced by Mel Blanc.

Uh, Mel Blanc. Oh, my gosh. Yes, right? How old is Sylvester, though? What's his... What's the age on Sylvester? Mel Blanc voiced him from 1945 when he was created in something called life with feathers and then Mel blank voiced him until Probably his death or in 1989. Yeah, I think no blink lived after that I thought Sylvester was older than that. Oh, no, he died in 89 Man, could you imagine having to bury one of your cartoon characters?

Aww. He died, that's why Mel Blanc stopped voicing. He did die, 1945, created in the wake of World War II, of course, to help America recover. That's what they gave him? No, that's not why. Get the boys back in the factory, get the cartoons back on the TV.

I know what'll get us out of this slump, Tweety Bird. Tweety Bird. Yeah. Stop thinking about the trenches boys. This is what you're fighting for. Yeah, he appeared in Fritz Freelink's life with feathers. One of the Mary Melodies, the Warney Brothers Mary Melodies. Very cool. No Tweety Bird yet, it was Sweetie Puss originally. Much better name, I think.

Yeah, Sweetie Puss. Sweetie Puss. Sylvester the Cat, an excellent pick. Sean Jordan, time for your fourth and then your final picks. Fourth pick, I'm gonna go Mr. Bigglesworth. Final picks. Fourth pick, I'm gonna go Mr. Bigglesworth. Oh, okay. Oh, yes.

Now, I know technically, I guess Morris is a real cat, though, too, so this is a fictional cat in the universe. But also a real cat. I don't know, we're picking real cats anyways. Fucking, yeah, yeah, Mr. Bigglesworth, man. Funny, you know, I just, obviously, we get to dive into the Austin Powers universe by picking Mr. Bigglesworth, but just a fun, nice little twist for Dr.

Evil. Having a bald cat. Yes. Funny when cats are bald. Yeah. You ever got your hands on one of those things? No. No. Like a cold chicken.

Oh yeah. It's a, it's a tough, I don't, I don't. It's a tough sell. It's a tough sell. I have a friend who like fully wanted one. I'm like, why? Oh no. Oh, no.

I mean, get it if you get it, but there does not. I'm sure I would love one unquestionably if I had one. Yeah, but I would never choose one. They're called Sphinx Cats. Yeah, yeah. I feel like Georgia and Hampton have one. They could. Georgia, Bruce and Hampton, you're right.

I'm pretty sure that they have a hairless little weirdo. That's right. Hairless little weirdo. I'm not talking about their child. Their name comes from Toronto, not Egypt, Sphinx cats. They're Canadian. Sphinx, srapids. Debra.

It's so weird. They can have more hair. Known as the Canadian Sphinx is a breed of cat known for its lack of fur. How about that? What? You think they'd give us extra fur in Canada? Yeah, right? Where did this one live? Well, with the weather.

Well, it's from Columbia, I guess. It's from BC. It must be. Uh, they were the... Mr. Bigglesworth was like a parody of that Blofeld from James Bond. Always had that Persian cat. Yes, I was going to say. They were, Mr. Bigglesworth was like a parody of that Blofeld from James Bond. Always had that Persian cat he was stroking. Yes, I was gonna say, what was the name of that cat though? Huh?

What was the name of that cat? It had to have been something along the lines of it. Isn't that Mr. something, I bet. I just, cause they got everything from the movies almost directly right across the park. I was gonna say, cause where does Bigglesworth, what's Bigglesworth making fun of? You know, the name of Bigglesworth? I's Bigglesworth making fun of, you know? The name of Bigglesworth?

I didn't know, I'm not familiar with James Bond. I'm looking, Solomon. Oh. All right. And naturally you got to Mr. Bigglesworth out of that. I understand. That's crazy. My grandfather's name was Solomon Katz before he changed to George Carmel.

Oh my God, see, oh my God. And you tell me there's not a God. He tells you that? He tells me all the time. I call him every morning. I call him at six a.m. He texts me every night, right around midnight. He goes, there's no God. I call you at six a.m. in the morning,

I say there's no God, and I text you at midnight, and I say there's no God. But he also says there's definitely a help. Yeah. Ah ha ha ha. It's a tough one. I'll send you packages that are like, I make them look like fan mail. And when you open them up, it's just written in somebody's blood, not mine. There is no God.

The last one, yeah, he sent me like one of those ransom notes, like newspaper clipping. He just said there's no God, but certainly a hell. But if there was, she... I love it. That's right. It's that kind of podcast, everybody. And your final picture on Duel of the Year. She. I hate you. Oh. I love it. That's right.

It's that kind of podcast, everybody. And your final pick, John Doerr. Final pick, just for me. Is anybody familiar with the movie The Cat's Eye? Stephen King's old movie The Cat's Eye. Yeah, I didn't think so. It was just for me, but the cat from The Cat's Eye. You haven't seen it.

It's a fun little watch. It is this cat who is the through line for three separate stories that make up a movie. So they'll cut to the cat like walking through this alley and then it'll pan up to like James Woods who's trying to quit smoking in one of the stories. And then it does that whole storyline and then it cuts back to the cat.

And the through line is there's this little troll that tries to steal children's souls by going while they're asleep and inhaling their soul. Kind of like- The cool line is there's this little troll that tries to steal children's souls by going while they're asleep and inhaling their soul. Kind of like, who's the end guy in Mortal Kombat who takes your Shao Kahn? Not Shang Tsung. Shao Kahn?

Shang Tsung, Shang Tsung. Anyway, kind of like that. So the cat gets in this little fight with the troll. But anyway, the cat from Cat's Eye. Fun, I watched that movie when I was a kid. People used to say that cats would steal a baby's breath was one of the bad things about that. I bet you that's the deeper meaning for Cat's Eye.

That seems right up their alley. Yeah. Honestly, they say never leave a baby with a cat because it'll just, yeet, steal its breath. If I ever have a baby, I'm planning on training them to ride my cats. Yeah. From day one.

Yes. I think it'd be a harder train for the cats. Yeah, I've started them out. I've started them out with, I've got them Barbie dolls, that kind of stuff. Cabbage patch. Just getting used to wearing a saddle. Getting used to the weight, absolutely. Saddle breaking them.

Yeah, he meant the cat wore a saddle. Anyway. That's right. That's goddamn right. Debra, time ever come here final back. Okay final cat. I'm going with a real-life cat You're all gonna have to Google and I'm glad that you have to because I'm obsessed with this cat now I will say quickly not nice off the top. He did pass He's been gone for about a year and I miss him every day. His name is Thurston waffles and Which is already I think the best name that we've had so far today.

The quickest I've ever laughed after I heard someone died. It's right up there with Thorough Ravencroft. Exactly. Thurston Waffles, and he is just the angriest cat. Like, I'm obsessed with this cat. I know who you're talking about. He's got a very famous meme of him screaming. It's just, I'm obsessed. This is the best cat.

He's so great. Oh, bright white. Just... Yeah, you all know that cat. Anger incarnate. Thirst and waffles. Quite popular. His name was Thirst and Waffles.

I mean, come on. Lived a nice long life. 15 year old cat. Nice long life. Very good life. Very good. But just like, just ridiculous. Lived a nice long life. 15 year old cat. Nice long life. Very good life. Very good.

But just like, just ridiculous. There's the screaming clips. If you could just see like a, I mean, I put that sticker on everything. I've got, you just do, you just screamer. You know where this cat lived? No. North Dakota. I'm on the Katzwicker video now.

A North Dakotan cat. There you go. I'd be upset too. Here's what it says in the aftermath of Thurston Waffle's death. News of his death triggered a global outcry in the meme and cat community. However, it was overshadowed by the death of the Queen of England, who passed on the same day. Damn! Bad beat. Thurston and the Queen dotted the face Wow bad

Maybe the only one who could overshadow Damn Wow the there you go North Dakota's like no, we're gonna celebrate Thursday first. Yeah, I'm awful David time for your final pick. I'm digging prison boots. Good. Oh, yeah Well that movie. Great movie. Love him in the movies and then the movie by himself. That new Puss in Boots has such a scary wolf in it. That villain is so scary in the new one.

That wolf is scary as shit. Deborah, when you were saying the cute, those like animals that are so cute, like it hurts us. Yes, you're sick. When Puss in Boots does the cat, the little kitten eyes. Oh, when he holds the hat. When he turns into a cat, it it's like it's so cute it's been there is Yeah, which is perfect

Went to college together David Defensive tackle yeah The killer bees they call them. That was the coaches. Time for my final pick. And I'm taking two cats. And I'm sorry, I'm just going to. They're real cats.

They're in this house right now. I'm taking my kitties out of the field. It's a package. I can't take one without the other. My favorite, it's my favorite cat. Both of my cats. There we go. Tied for first place.

I love them so much. They are, I have written a lot in the last nine years for television, you know, stand up, all that stuff. A book. It pales in comparison to the vast fictional lives I have made up for both of these cats, in comparison to the vast fictional lives I have made up for both of these cats just in riffing with my wife around the house.

Like insane to the point where I almost don't even wanna get into it, but Beetlejuice, whose name is Beetlejuice, is in real life like a very polite kitty. Like very shy, mind's his manners, very polite cat. We have this extensive backstory for him where he's a French prince who faked his own death, who's born by the name Armando Elgato,

faked his death at sea, came to America. Just insane, the kind of insane stuff that I think most pet owners can relate to on some level. Eddie, the cat who my wife brought home, my mother who is fine now but was diagnosed with cancer and I was a wreck and my wife brought home this tiny little kitten, Eddie, who we brought her into the room

and she fell asleep on my chest and was like, my wife had Beetlejuice before we met so I was always like the, I was the dad who stepped up for That cat but Eddie's like Mike and like she like fell asleep on my chest and we've been bonded Oh, yeah, and she has so much crazy personality She runs it like strangers can come over and she'll walk up and like sit on their lap like she's that kind of cat But I just love my cat so much. I couldn't do a cat rap without taking and shout outs to all of my cats from the past Stanley Iris Chester, Nachacha.

Augie. Jake. Augie. Shout out to all of the cats. Ben Darius. Yeah. Instead of a podcast today, it feels like we recorded a bit of a podcast.

Okay. Yes! Everyone. Everybody. Thank you. Okay. Everyone. Oh my God. Now I'm worried that he, his recording did it. Hopefully it didn't mess up his recording. I bet I restart I restarted as soon as I opened And we're gonna do it on zoom we got to get some fun out of it, right He just doesn't come I just

He texts us like hey, we're not gonna do this anymore Amazing hey ifE's over. You gotta restart your recording. That's it, I already did. Okay, okay, thank you. That's it, that's the final episode of All for You. Isaac didn't want that. Amazing.

He didn't want you to, even for a second. Hey, AFE's over, Ian, restart your recording. You might call it a podcats. A podcat. I'm bummed it took me an hour and 30 minutes to think of that. And I'm feline fine about it. Now you've got to go as you have a hard out. Oh, he fucking did it.

He did it. He did it. Amazing. That was the final pick. My cat's Eddie and Beetlejuice. Isaac, do you have a draft pick? Pussy. No, I'm kidding.

Oh! Oh! I'm kidding. That's a real David Bowie 2019 pick. You want? Yeah. I'm joking. I'm picking.

I was stunned. I am the red leather pussy destroyer. No, I'm picking the cat from Breakfast at Tiffany's, the unnamed cat. I was stunned. I am the red leather pussy destroyer. Yeah. I'm picking the cat from Breakfast at Tiffany's, the unnamed cat. Oh! Oh! Yeah! I think I remember the film.

It's a very fundamental character. It's a symbolic, nostalgic, very good cat. I think I recall we both kind of liked it. Yeah. I love this. That's the one thing we got. I've seen Deep Blue Something play that song twice. They opened and closed with that song when I saw it. Nice.

They didn't have to, yeah. Yeah, they did. I don't know what they would do. I don't know what the meat on that sandwich would be. What they played in between it, nobody knows. Yeah. The middle of the sandwich was everyone outside smoking, unfortunately.

I felt so bad for him. Play Tiffany's again! And then you hear it started at the end and everyone's like, oh shit, and they ran back in. I still have their set list somewhere in a box back home. That's a crazy thing to find in a box! This is a Deep Blue Something playlist from 99? Breakfast at Tiffany's, banter, banter, banter, riff,

breakfast at Tiffany's. Boom, boom, boom, boom, bad joke, bad joke, wish I was a comedian, bad joke, new song, and then on the bottom it said B-A-T and it underlined three times. Oh my God. To recap, Sean, you went first, you took MC Scat Cat, Stimpson J. Cat, Tony the Tiger, Mr. Bigglesworth,

and the cat from Stephen King's Cat's Eye. Debra, you on second, you took Nermal, Boo Boo Kitty from Laverne and Shirley, Morris the Cat, Sylvester and Thurston Waffles. David, you went third, you took Abraham, DeLacy, Giuseppe, Casey, Thomas, O'Malley, the Alley Cat. Mufasa, Hobbs, Chester Cheetah, and Puss in Boots. I went last and I took the cat in the hat James Corden's Bustopher Jones

Garfield Beetlejuice and any Gordon's Buster for just James Corden's Buster for Jones plays putting on James Corden's Buster for Jones We left a lot of meat on the bone Nala all of them. Oh my god. There's a lot. Yeah, that was good I didn't think we'd get as much out of that. Yay cat woman would have been fun Bagheera Bagheera for sure the Cheshire cat

Scratchy. Heathcliff. Snaggle Puss. Heathcliff. Oh my gosh. I had Mr. Jinx from Meet the Parents. I like Mr. Jinx a lot. Felix, I mean, Felix the cat means nothing to me, but people seem to like him back in the day.

All the Thunder Cats. What about Cat Stevens? Cat Stevens with that account? Tom? Cat Stevens? Exactly, aw. All right. So many cats.

We wanna hear yours. Hit us up at AllFantasyPod on Twitter. AllFantasyPodcast at gmail.com. Shout out to everyone, the A-F-E Patreon, the A-F-E subreddit, the A-F-E Shaslackity. Shout out to super producer Isaac Lee on the ones and twos. Shout out to Deborah DeGiovanni. Thank you so much for being our guest today. Thank you. Shout out to St. Sue Carmel. Shout out to Frankie Ocean. Shout out to Deborah DeGiovanni. Thank you so much for being our guest today.

Thank you. Shout out to St. Sue Carmel. Shout out to Frankie Ocean. Shout out to Sid The Doo. Shout out to Haji Beats. And more important than all of that, tune in again next week to another brand new episode of All Fert-asy or All Feline-antasy.

Take your pick. Everything. Sha-clackity. Don't you mean she can't she click no Now that's what I call That was a head gum podcast.