All Fantasy Everything - Delicious Looking Inedible Things AKA 'Forbidden Snacks' (w/ Katie Nolan, Sean Jordan, & David Gborie)

Episode Date: April 23, 2020

The GVG is coming to live from quarantine for the FIRST TIME! Thank you to SUPER PRODUCER Marissa, we have navigated these rough waters and recorded from our separate and secret lairs! Joining us on our first mission from the Legion Of Zoom is fan favorite and all around fantastic person Katie Nolan! We wanted to give ya something goofy so we drafted "Forbidden Snacks!" Essentially, these are items that look delicious, but cannot be eaten. As always, we hope you are all staying safe and sound out there. Sending good vibes to you and yours!Episode Guest:Katie Nolan @katienolan IG: @natiekolan Podcast: Sports? with Katie NolanSupport the show!Sponsors:Feals: Become a member at feals.com/allfantasy and get 50% off your first order with free shipping.Join the All Fantasy Everything Patreon for exclusive mailbag and movie watch-a-long episodes. Check it out at www.patreon.com/AllFantasy.Rate All Fantasy Everything 5-stars on Apple Podcasts.Merch:T-Shirts! Sweaters! Stickers! Mugs! Deck yourself out in some goods at www.teepublic.com/user/allfantasyeverythingFollow the Good Vibes Gang on social media:Ian Karmel @IanKarmel IG: @IanKarmelSean Jordan @SeanSJordan IG: @SeancougarmelonJordanDavid Gborie @Thegissilent IG: @Coolguyjokes87Mars Mel @MarsMel IG: @Mars.MelShow Email: [e-mail] Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

This is a HeadGum Podcast. Welcome to another brand new episode of All Fantasy Everything. The podcast that is in five different locations, spread across the country, all recording via the technology provided to us by the Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. I assume, right? Multiple countries, bruv. Oh, multiple. We're international. We're international right now.

We're on the Flu Network. Is that what it is? The Flu Network? Isn't that with Harry Potter? Isn't that what they called it? It is. Flu powder. It was cocaine.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Flu powder. I just started getting into Harry Potter. You can't do this now. Why can't I do it? No, I didn't just start getting into it. I've been knowing that for years. No, Ian did. Yeah, I just started getting into Harry Potter. You can't do this now. Why can't I do it? No, I didn't just start getting it. I've been knowing that for years. No, Ian did. Yeah, I just started getting into it.

Really? It's good. Yeah, it's phenomenal. You know what happened? I got into Harry Potter because I was grounded over Christmas break one year. Something that would happen to Harry Potter. Well, yeah. And then I went to the library

right before christmas break something hermione would do yeah and i checked out two harry potter books and you know when it culminated i finished the half-blood prince in jail did you really that's what that's what happened to harry potter as well i read the half-blood prince in albert county jail something that would happen to serious black Black. Yes, of course. Which is also David's alter ego. That's what ended him up in prison. Because he was being Sirius Black. Oh, I was getting Sirius Black.

Once you get that Beijing, you'll be getting some Sirius Black. Man, don't tell him. You're doing carpets outside the car. Oh, my bad. That is a deep throwback. Don't tell him. Don't tell him. You're doing car bits outside the car. Oh, my bad. Ah! This is... This whole... That is a deep... That is a deep throwback.

This whole quarantine is car bits. I'm just in my house doing weird bits to no one. Yeah, dude. Yeah, my girlfriend has been getting me into... Your what? My girlfriend. Your what? My girlfriend.

Yeah, she's been getting me into Harry Potter. She's a big Harry. She's a big Harry what? She's a big Harry. And then weed smoke just went into his face. That's not weed smoke. That's incense, dude, that I've been burning. She's a big Harry.

She's a big Harry lithuanian swing man no she's getting me into harry potter dude i love it i've watched three of the movies four of the movies and now i'm gonna start reading the books i think they're awesome we should go get some butterbeer um let's go get so drunk on butterbeer i know it doesn't have alcohol but we sneak alcohol in and we get drunk off butterbeer I know it doesn't have alcohol but we sneak alcohol in and we get drunk off butterbeer until we're removed from Universal Studios I mean I'm kind of king around there

so I'm not going to do that but they love me in Universal Studios you ain't got to lie David they gave me and my brother free passes because my brothers were dancing it was great your brother is so sick your brother is but I only met one of them so No, dog. They gave me and my brother free passes because my brothers were dancing. It was great. Your brother is so sick.

Your brother is, but I only met one of them. So he is amazing, and I can attest to that. Yeah, he's pretty tight. Mr. Backlip. What about the other one? I'm sure he's fantastic. I just didn't get to meet him because David wouldn't bring him around. They're all pretty tight.

So. Sweet. It's that kind of podcast. All right, cool. Talk to you guys later. All right, Thanks for tuning in Make sure Hell yeah dude So

Katie are you gonna Fly out west To go to Universal Studios And drink butterbeer with us Uh yeah Committed Sure Is that where Universal Studios

I thought it was down In the bayou If we go to the one in Florida It's got the full Harry Potter ass place Yeah that's That's where Universal is No

There's one 10 minutes From my house I just went there Do they have the full Harry Potter-esque place. Yeah, that's where Universal is. No, there's one 10 minutes from my house. I just went there. Do they have the full Harry Potter queue? Just went there. Sounds like you're not observing quarantine. I mean, before quarantine. It's full as hell. It's full as hell.

And they got the Simpson shit. The one in Flo Rida is like the actual, it's bigger, I guess. That's what my queen said. She said it's the dank one to go to. My queen. You guys are so cute. Oh, my boyfriend

says stuff like this about me behind my back. He's from Aurora. He does not. He does not do that. He's like, this bitch. You're lucky he doesn't chew tobacco. That's what you think. You haven't seen him since the teen started.

Oh, man. Is anyone picking up any weird teen habits? I stopped drinking. That's a weird habit for me. That is a weird habit for you. I did too for a little bit. I don't drink as much now. Yeah, I haven't drank in like 12 days or something.

Yeah. I don't know. No. I walk. I've been skating again. All good stuff. Oh, yeah. That's great. I've been doing again. All good stuff. Oh yeah, that's great. I've been doing a trick every day.

Wow. Like tricks that I haven't done for like 20 years, so I get freak pissed when I can't do it. Freak pissed. Do you want to give us a little preview of being freak pissed? I think it'll spike the microphone and I'll break everything in here. I flipped out enough to where there were kids

in their front yard and I had to stop because I was like throwing my board all over the street and I looked like an asshole. Wow. So I had to stop and go on a walk. That's me during Rocket League. I'm playing a lot of Rocket League and when you miss a ball that you really should have gotten, I'm like, and then the dog freaks out and it's just a mess. Your dog, by the way, you want to talk about your dog a little bit?

I'd like you to. All right. No. I respect that. Some stuff's just for you. I have a knife now for some reason. What? Remote a second ago and now you're holding the knife. You can't turn the TV on with a knife, Dave. Let me put my

shirt back on. Just for the listeners at home, nobody has shirts on. Each of us is holding a machete. They're all glowing different colors. I'm wearing shoulder pads like Andre 3000. My dog is growling and drooling and like... On a thick chain.

If you look at any of us, we look like our normal selves, but if you make eye contact, we each have the head of an eagle. Just to paint a picture for everyone at home. Are you surrounded by canned goods? There's all my shoes and a wig and a computer. A wig?

Yeah, let me find the wig. You look like, this looks like the set of Sean's version of Info Wars. Thank you guys for tuning in. Go ahead and smash that like and subscribe button whenever you get a sec. I got some hot takes after we do this ad for Red Bull, bro. No big. The other thing we're going to smash is the shadow government. It's called That's How they get you with sean jordan it's a it's a folksy or conspiracy theory podcast i like it that way better i wear hoodies that say

herd mentality on them yeah herd immunity yeah dude oh god somebody was hopping on my i have been flipping out on the internet lately because south dakota's blowing this shit so hard and uh i had some crazy dudes come at me i've ever done that huh this is the hardest they've ever blown it in my life what else have they blown it on but i mean aren't they so spread out there no i mean not no it's still a city i mean sioux falls is a city it's like a chunk of a big city, but it's not that spread out. And they're fucking blowing it. There's bars that are open right now.

You could go to the nickel spot if you wanted to. And you want to. I can tell. Did anybody think they were going to close the nickel spot? No, I don't think so. It takes a lot to close the nickel spot. It's the nickel spot. Yeah.

It's like the Waffle House. It's the Waffle House in South Dakota. Oh, yeah. They use that as like an index to It's the Waffle House in South Dakota. Oh, yeah. They use that as like an index to determine how bad a disaster is in the South. Yeah. And those closed like three weeks ago, two or three weeks ago. And everybody was like, oh, shit. It's bad.

If the Waffle House is closed. Anyway. Yeah, dude. The only thing getting smothered is I took the plane up and I don't know how to land it. The only thing getting smothered. Come on. Landing gear broke

Alright hold on it's jammed Don't do it You sully that shit You sully that shit The only thing getting smothered is this freaking virus By community action banding together There he is There he is

You thought he left Can we still put air horns in there Can we get air horns still Marissa I got it I can hit it again you thought he left. Can we still put air horns in there? Can we get air horns still, Marissa? Is that tight? I got it. I can hit it again. Marissa, will you say hi? Hi. Hello.

I'm here too. I'm just mostly muted. What's up? The only one with a professional looking setup. Thank you. Yeah, you've got like backdrops and like... I don't think mine is unprofessional. I think there's just nothing. You're staring into heaven. You got a sitcom staircase behind like, I don't think mine is unprofessional. I think there's just nothing. You're staring at heaven. You got a sitcom staircase behind you. I mean,

that's not, not professional. Who's coming down that thing? You know, I could, could even hardest day. That would be if Kadeem Hardison was in my house. Hardison.

Yeah. What if I just, I trapped the sixth man. He just comes down on a towel, drinking orange juice out of the carton he puts his hand like really far down on your shoulder just kind of like almost onto your chest he goes thanks david yeah no quarantine habits i haven't picked up any week yeah no i don't know what you're talking about oh that's that is 90s sitcom star Kadeem Harrison. He was here before.

He came with a condo. We're just, we're in a Scrabble league together. Joining us in the fortress of Zoom. Solid Zooms. Temple of Zoom. There it is. Joining us in the temple of Zoom. Temple of Zoom is good.

The temple of Zoom. The legion of Zoom. The legion of Zoom. Sean S. Jordan on on twitter sean cougar mel and jordan on instagram hey buddy hey buddies how we doing hey buddy i'm doing all right man i mean like all everyone's healthy and uh happy and i'm working so what can i what can i say i got sriracha near my expensive zoom recorder you know i can't uh i can't complain dude how are you doing fantastic i have nothing to promote obviously i want everyone to be excellent to Zoom recorder, you know, I can't, uh, I can't complain, dude. How are you doing? Fantastic.

I have nothing to promote. Obviously I want everyone to be excellent to each other and everybody tweeted the governor of South Dakota. Be nice when you do it, but tell her to tell everyone to stay home, please. That's what I have coming up. There it is promoted. Yeah, this is a, I'm glad this is working out. This is really fun. I love all of you. I miss you so terribly. So this is very fun to be able to do it. And I'm excited. I was looking forward to this for a long time. Hell yeah.

I'm going to keep going down just on this one because it's our first one back. Marissa Melnick. Hello. In the temple of Zoom. Yes. At Mars Mel on Twitter. At Mars Mel on Instagram. Scream, scream, scream.

I was not expecting that in quarantine I could now like patch in remotely and like actually set up a microphone and chime in now. So this is a fun development. I know, it's great. I like this. How are things up in Toronto? Things are good in Canada. Quarantining in my parents' basement. I'm setting up an area just for virtual reality.

And I'm excited to do some, put out some more videos in VR soon. I'm going to be shooting in mixed reality and it's going to be real fun and exciting. That's awesome. I already said this, but just beware of the lawnmower, man. Jeff Fahey.

Popular Jeff Fahey vehicle that David keeps bringing up. Popular Jeff Fahey vehicle. I didn't know David was such a Fahey head, but David really likes Jeff Fahey a lot. It's a Fahey vehicle that David keeps bringing up. Popular Jeff Fahey vehicle. I didn't know David was such a Fahey head, but David really likes Jeff Fahey a lot. It's a Fahey head. But yeah. Beautiful. Stay safe up there, Marzmell. Thank you.

The G is silent on Twitter. Coolguyjokes87 on Instagram. Uh-huh. In a townhouse in the valley. I'm in here, man. Upstairs. Downstairs. Scrabbley with here man upstairs downstairs in front of stairs front of stairs on that big ass dang couch uno yeah i have the one in the deluxe edition in the ten i'm living don't ask about uno act like you knew yeah uh you know what what have you been up

to man how you keeping busy uh i've been really good about staying off social media so i'm very proud of that uh i finished a book uh you know it's called heavy by i can't roxanne gay no hunger that's is it by the insane clown posse i'm really into them lately it's by this guy keith layman uh he's it's really good if you've you should look it up it's like a memoirs of his life it's about being a fat african-american man uh i'm watching skateboard highlights yeah i've watched pretty much every r&b video around yeah you know i'm just uh yeah i'm doing good yeah but he said what he's been doing since quarantine oh just smoking weed just just smoking a bunch of weed uh katie nolan on twitter naty colon on instagram natty colon in real life i'm just. I don't know what you eat. Natty Poland. Natty Poland.

Host of the popular sports podcast and also Up Late. Up Close. God damn it. It's close. You got this. I've been smoking Always Late. Hey. Always Late. I almost went with Always Late the first time. I thought you were saying it's up close.

I was like, what the fuck is she talking about? Thank you all for knowing the name of my show. I did. I thought you didn't know. I did know. Sean got it wrong. No, I thought Katie didn't know. No, Sean stayed silent.

Sean did the only smart thing. Sean is the one feeding me this information. And I'm like, I don't think that's what it is. But he sent it to me. So I'm sorry on behalf of Sean. That's all right. I'm like, I don't think that's what it is, but he sent it to me, so I'm sorry on behalf of Sean. That's alright. I appreciate it. He is a real dickhead. A wild dickhead. Is he here still? I'm sorry for everything that I did.

I apologize. I didn't mean to do that to you. I didn't mean to put everyone... That's no fun for the riff when you just... I didn't mean to put everyone in a bad headspace. I didn't know we were riffing, Dave. I apologize. What the fuck did you think this was? Like I said originally, always late with Katie Nolan.

Sure. On the, oh God, what does ESPN stand for? Eastern Sports. No. Everybody's. Entertainment.

Entertainment. Sports Programming Network. The Entertainment Sports Programming Network. Everybody's super proud of Nolan. Yeah. There it is. There it is. Come on. Come's super proud of Nolan. Yay! There it is. There it is. Come on.

Come on. What are we doing? What are we doing? It's not being creative. Recent puppy acquirer. That's me. Rocket League champion. Keeper of the puppies.

Keeper of the puppies. What is Rocket League? Two questions. How am I doing? Don't want to answer that one. Rocket League is a video game in which you control a car, and there's a giant ball, and you have to play soccer. That sounds sick.

It's especially incredible. It's the only video game I can play and am actually better at when under the influence of a certain drug, allegedly. Cocaine. I'm very good at it on Coke. I just blow a line and then score goals constantly. Some special K, you drop yourself in a K-hole and then you're wicked.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I do a couple whippets and then I whip it right into the top right corner of the net. Whippets, I feel like whippets need to come back. That's how Maradona does it. That's right. You're not wrong. Some of the greats.

Yeah. It's a game based on how fast your jaw can move back and forth. A lot of people, messy, also big coke guy. Oh,

you're not messy? I mean, you know, I guess. I'm just saying shit. I guess. Just messy. Just messy dudes.

I'm just getting messy. You're getting messy Myrtle is a very cute puppy peep the Instagram for Myrtle God she's so cute and she knows it she's got real hot girl energy so like anytime you ask her to do anything she's like but why

look at my face and you're like yeah I get it but you still have to sit when I say sit or you don't get the treat. And she's like, I'm sure. And I'm like, no, take the fucking treat. You give her the treat. Just take the treat. Yo, she's about to have a hot girl summer.

I know. I know. Dogs still can, right? Can a dog still have a hot girl summer? Oh, dogs can have hot girl summers. Yeah, they have seven hot girl summers in our one year. Oh, my God. They get to have seven hot girl summers in our one year. Oh, my God. They get to have seven hot girl summers a year.

Last year, they were all, that's why all dogs were exhausted last year. Yeah. Yeah. That's a good sequel to All Dogs Go to Heaven is all dogs are exhausted. Oh, I thought you meant all dogs have hot girl summer. I'd watch that.

No, also that. Yeah, also that. I'd watch the whole series, yeah. Here's what I was thinking of the other day, i just was laughing because i was all stone freak nick but it's just for dogs you have to explain a dog park first what's freak nick you remember atlanta had that atlanta had that festival they called freak nick oh yeah yeah yeah but just dogs. It makes less sense. It makes less sense to me now. I still don't know what Freaknik is.

Are the dogs playing instruments and being bands? Yeah, and they're grinding on each other. They're just in cars barking at each other. You just want a dog orgy is what you want in Atlanta. A dog orgy. They all have on Carl is what you want in Atlanta. A dog watching. What city is that? Daisy Dukes.

They all have on Carl Canaivas. Oh my God. They all have on Daisy Dukes. This is the hardest I've laughed since quarantine watching David Lamp. I was just thinking about like, like one dog in a Buccaneers jersey and Timberlands hollering at another dog in Daisy Dirt.

But it's only dogs. There's no people around. Like a slightly faded Mike Alstott jersey for some reason. Just like a dog with a chain and a toothpick. Just like, oh, girl. But like 100,000 dogs. Not a few dogs. Like 100,000 dogs with no people

and no people oh man dog cops on the outside just trying to keep everything in line is freak nick a portmanteau of freak and picnic is it a freaky picnic yes i don't think i don't know i would like it i would bet it is for sure mean, no, I think it started because all the HBCUs in Atlanta had the same homecoming. And then it grew into this whole thing. But the point is that I just love the idea of dogs just walking around being very sexual to each other. If it were going to be a portmanteau for a picnic, it should be Thicknick. We should get a festival called Thicknick. I mean, truthfully, every picnic I've ever been to is a Thick Nick.

That's true. I mean, the only one's worth going to, honestly. I mean, if it wasn't a Thick Nick when I got there, it was a Thick Nick when I left. Of course. Can you call our next tour the Thick Nick? Absolutely. I'm into it. I think we sort of have to.

Yeah, the Thick Nick. I'm going to wear short shorts for the whole thing especially when we're driving uh it'll be a car bit in and out of the car bit i am ian carmel at ian carmel on twitter at ian carmel on instagram at ian carmel on jewish zoom you're gonna use that one once and I'm using it now. You are so pumped. Joom. If you will. The legion of Joom. The legion of Joom. I'm a Joomstay prepper.

I am kind of a Joomstay prepper. I have two jars of gefilte fish in the fridge right now. Gross. In case anything pops off. I'm never more than five feet. We see it, David. Christ, put it down. It's just for cutting blunts. I got an old iMac to barter with

if I need to, so I think I'm all right. Is that the iMac from Zoolander that they break open or is that the older one? The files are in the computer. You mean the boob site is in the computer?

Perfect boobs are in the computer? You mean the boob site is in the computer? Perfect boobs are in the computer? Perfect boobs. I had to explain that the other day. I was trying to explain to Laura what the boob site was and she goes, it's just pictures of boobs and I'm like, yeah, from neck to belly button too. It wasn't like it was just...

Oh, you animal. I was 16 or whatever. That's antisocial. That's weird. It's crazy that there were no faces. I didn't make the choice. That was just on the site. You jerked off to like headless busts?

Well, I typed in before I knew it. You could go to a museum and pop a boner. That's an insane. I was about that age. How do you think this whole thing started? That's fucking wild i was trying to think up websites to look up porn when we first got a computer and i was like the boob site that's gotta be it was the boob site is what it was oh it was the boob site dot com holy shit http colon backslash backslash oh you know he typed it all in of course he typed

it all in tried typing in worldwide first, but it didn't work. Full sentence. World Wide Web, a hypertext something protocol. I feel like we should reach out to whoever made the boob site. I feel like you could find that guy. Oh, yeah. That person is in jail. I'm sorry.

They're in there with Sirius Black right now. It'll be... Oh, just getting eaten up by dementors. It'll be AFE's first true crime podcast. It'll open up with, the following is a collect call from the Henderson Correctional Facility. Do you accept?

Yeah, I don't know. I was buying everything with the word boobs in it. They call him the headless torsman because he just puts naked torsos on the internet and gets off to him. The headless torsman. Oh, boy.

There we go. We hit the stride pretty quick. That is crazy. Sean Jordan has the superpower to build. You could jack off on a Sears and you'd be fine. It's not even really like you're looking at people if there's no, if it's just- That's why it's weird.

That's what I'm saying. It's, there's no personality. Sean, you don't, you don't have to answer this question, but you should. Do you, can you climax without cutting off your lover's head? I'll not answer it. Do you put a pillow over her face In order to reach completion

We'll find out on my wedding night Because I don't want to burn in hell Christ Christ My god Circled on the calendar End of the summer I mean I am now

It's going to be A fun time I'm going to be a fun time. Damn, I know. Let's just say I'm going to have a lot of Beijing on. Do you think August 15th is within the realm of possibility? We're wondering because it's like just on the cusp, I feel like. So my cousin had one or was supposed to have one in June in the Hamptons and has since canceled and rescheduled for August.

So I think that sounds better than it could. I hope. I mean, if we have to move it, we have to move it. I'm not going to do it if it's not completely safe and recommended. That's smart. I'd like to be officiating the ceremonies as Gary Oldman's character from True Romance. Just so you know. That's perfect.

Ian's going to be like, yo, it is white boy day today. It finally is white boy day. And then I'm going to get married. It's full grill. It's going to be like, yo, it is white boy day today. It finally is white boy day. And then I'm going to get married. It's full grill. It's going to be great. Looking like fucking Johnny Depp and the Pirates of the Caribbean. But are you going to wear your chain? Because I've been trying to go back and forth about it.

Ian's going to wear both of them, plus the one that I buy him for officiating. Are you going to wear socks, Ian? Maybe we should talk about this. This is an off-air conversation because we want the pictures to sort of hit people for the first time. Well, I'm thinking we're going to bookend pictures because we're two fat guys, so we should maybe both not be wearing socks.

That's how we need to coordinate. We're going to wear socks with no pants, so I don't see why you guys would have socks on. It's beyond me. Because the new men's thing in menswear is no socks. No socks. I know, I was doing a joke about not wearing pants. Yeah, no, Sean. Totally doing a bit.

We get it. Sean knows. I do this running bit where I pretend I don't know what's cool, but obviously I do. I'll just hang back for a while. You guys take it over. GQ Jordan over here? GQ Jordan, dude. I'll just hang in the bomb shelter with the iMac. Sean, I'll give you 20 bucks

if you know what GQ stands for right now. No questions asked. Gentlemen's quarterly. I'll take that 20 bucks if you know what GQ stands for right now. No questions asked. Gentleman's Quarterly. I'll take that 20 through Venmo. Venmo's open, baby. I'm doing it. I'm a man. Yo, did you just see how the government was asking for cash apps? What?

Do you guys not have cash app? Welcome to That's How They Get Ya. I'm Sean Jordan. Today, the government asks for your cash app. That's how they get ya. That's what I thought. I was like, yo, Trump's trying to fuck. That's exactly how they get you i'm sean jordan today the government asked for your cash app that's how they get you that's what i thought i was like yo trump's trying to fuck that's exactly how they get you yeah it was get cha if you have cash app they like sent a that you got a notice that was like hey the government blah blah blah basically just like you can get your refund through cash app which is not how i wanna that doesn't seem right yeah that's how i feed my kids it's like when you get sushi at a gas station like there's certain things you shouldn't be able to do that's exactly what it feels like i don't want to get my

refund to my cash app don't let me have that do you guys have cash apps i have a cash app i have a cash i don't know what you mean you mean like venmo i don't know what you're talking about cash app there's a there's a venmo it's like venmo for black people no no i don't know what you're talking about. Cash app. There's a Venmo for black people. No, I don't. Well, I mean, at least none of us have a PayPal, right? I have a PayPal. I have a PayPal. I have a cash app. I have a Venmo.

I have Google Wallet. You diversified your portfolio. I have a vault. You guys need vault? I got vault. What's vault? Man, I'm into some shit. All of my money is tied up in expensive Persian rugs right now. Yeah. I'm not liquid at all.

I have like six dollars that aren't tied up in expensive Persian rugs. I got on the other hand, totally liquid. I'm selling Hennessy by the gallon. By the gallon. Damn. We're gathered here today not only to sell Hennessy by the gallon. By the gallon. Damn. We are gathered here today not only to sell Hennessy by the gallon, but also to fantasy draft things that look delicious, but we're afraid they are not edible.

So inedible things that look delicious. Do we remember which user suggested this? Because it was an amazing idea. It's such a good pick. Please tweet at us, whoever, because it was such a good pick. Please tweet at us, whoever, because it was a very good suggestion. Please tweet at us. I'll put it on the list. Get a shout out next episode for sure.

I don't know how to go that far back on Twitter to figure it out. So anyway, somebody did and it's a fantastic idea. Also known as forbidden snacks. The internet calls these forbidden snacks. Oh, the internet has a name for these already. Yes, sir.

Oh, really? Forbidden snacks. I'm big in the forbidden snack community, so this is the draft for me. Me too. I keep hitting on all these married ladies. Hey! Come on!

Hey! Are you not entertained? Is that not why you are here? Yeah, forbidden snacks. Now, the way we determine the order of this draft is through a rocking game of rock, paper, scissors. I always, every time I've done this show, I forget about this part and how mad it makes me.

It's rollicking. It's not angry. It's rollicking. So here we go. We throw on shoot. Here we go. Rock, paper, scissors, shoot. David wins.

God damn it. I should have pretended there was a delay. I'm like, I'm frozen. I threw paper. What happened? Oh, it's this internet out here in New York. It's this New York internet. Hotbed of the virus.

It is a hotbed, isn't it? Hotbed. One in a thousand. One out of every thousand New York City residents now has or has died from coronavirus it is not a cold

it's not a cold bed it is not a cold bed that's what the god damn thing in Sioux Falls like per capita it's worse right now and that's so stupid

it's such a how is have you half off drinks at Nickel and Dimes or whatever the name of that bar was Johnny Nickel

is it like if you look out your window is it just like the nickel spot dude we used to go to Have you... Half off drinks at Nickel and Dimes or whatever the name of that bar was. Johnny Nickel Sacks? Is it like... Johnny Nickel Sacks? If you look out your window... Would you call it? Is it just like the Nickel Spot, dude? We used to go to Pool League every Monday night there. That was their...

So I was in the bathroom in the Nickel Spot one time in this huge... I bet that is a... Awful bathroom. Listen. Awful bathroom. This guy comes in.

This guy was like 6'8". So wait, sorry, sorry, sorry. You were at the Pickle Spot in the Nickel Spot? I was at the pickle spot and the nickel spot? I was at the pickle spot and the nickel spot. Keep going. Some dude walked in and he just looked at me. He's like, man, I want to beat the shit out of you, but you're cool, so I won't.

Yeah, it was a bartender there who was off work that night. And he just wanted to fight. But I had been in there enough to where he knew me. And he's like, I want to beat the shit out of you, but I not gonna and i was like all right man and i just left after that it was intense whoa yeah some shit happened at tommy jack's last time i was there all these shitty bars that i'll never go to ever again say it you don't even need to say it i was thinking it you absolutely don't need to say it jesus christ it sounds like the kind of thing that might happen in i don't know i don't know like uh i don't know david i don't know i don't know i don't know like uh i don't know

david i don't know i don't know i don't know where i don't know i know that there are some some types of things that that behavior reminds me of you know i don't i would you know i would start it with a g yeah and if you if you were stressing me to spell it if you were stressing me to spell it let's say we are i'd follow it up with a h-e-t-t-o that's me yeah yeah that's me that's me that's how i was raised you know what i mean maybe that's how i was raised too i guess apparently white ghetto some white ghetto shit dude i leaned in yeah it is cheryl sandberg she wrote that cheryl sandberg sure Sure did. Yeah! References, bro. References, dog.

Bang! David, you won Rock, Paper, Scissors. As the victor, is it incumbent upon you to determine the order of today's draft? Before you do that, I will remind you it is a serpentine draft for the love of Pete. And what is that? That's great. Stay like that for the rest of the Zoom, please.

That is my friend who just got stoned is what that is. I'm a party. The audience. Dude, you look so, that's awesome. I love it. Serpentine draft. It's sort of like if you were trying to go on a walk in your neighborhood, and you don't want to be close to anybody,

so you walk down, let's say 38th street, and then you go about a half a block and there's a whole family of people congregating in the driveway doing six feet apart, but they're all still in the driveway. So you walk across the street and then you figure your walk back down, maybe even go a block down. So you go down 37th and you get about a half of a block. And then you see a bunch of people who went on a community bike ride, but they're all six feet apart. So they're taking up the whole street because there's no such thing as traffic anymore.

So you see that they have the whole thing blocked off. So you're like, all right, I'll go down to 36th Street and then I'll go back the other way. And then you go back down the other way and there's a bunch of rich older people sitting in Adirondacks who are maybe having more than 10 people in their yard, but they're doing an okay job

drinking the beer that they've been sitting on for a long time. What's an Adirondack? Is that a chair? Oh, it's like that big wooden chair that you see that rich people sit in on the beach and stuff. Oh, I thought you were talking about anoraks like those windbreakers. Yeah, they're in those. They're in those. They're in anoraks on Adirondacks.

Okay. It's like how a boat can be on a ship, but a ship can't be on a boat. Exactly. Exactly. You can scratch and itch, but a ship can't be on a boat. Exactly. You can scratch and itch, but you can't itch and scratch. There it is. Anyway, you see them. They're all gathered. There's a couple more. There's a couple more.

You're like, fuck it. I'll just go down to 35th Street. Then you go back the other way and you see another group of people. I wasn't aware that you guys changed the draft format to basically a circle. It's going 38, 37, 36, 35th. You're going down. Yeah, but those aren't going back. We're going to invite four new people to come

do more picks. We're just here for the first round. We're in comfy chairs though. You're going down one street and then you're going down a block and then coming back the other way. It's kind of serpentine. I'm no cartographer. You're not?

I thought you were. Only amateur. Only amateur. You're a cartographer. I dropped out before graduation. A lot of people think that. Really? Yeah.

Had a kid, bro. No, I didn't know that. That shows you how much college is worth. I knew you had a kid. Yeah. Well, whatever. Basically, what it means is you pick fourth in the first round, you pick first in the second round.

Sure. Okay. I get it now. If you want to say it like that. Sean, I thought it was good, Sean. I thought it was good. I appreciate it. And I think you're smart and handsome.

Oh. Hey, thanks, bud. Oh. Yeah. An abundance. David, with that in mind, what will the order of today's draft be? I got to pick my... I'm going to go in the order of this thing.

Well, your order's different than ours. So I'm gonna go first and then I'm gonna kick it down to Ian. Oh, Carms! Alright. And then Katie and then back up to Sean. Sean in the hot corner? Hot corn! It's, listen, our whole world has

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Yeah, we're back. Welcome back to All Fantasy Everything, the only podcast that has ever existed or will ever exist, except, of course, for sports. We're getting old. Wait, Sean, I was just going to lay out and let you talk shit like you tried to last time and send that on this podcast.

Did you want to talk shit now that I'm here? Yeah, you're going to say it to her face? Playboy? Are we going to talk that shit to her face? Super dang. Are you day shit? I'll talk shit. I can't remember what I said.

Please remind me. I think, I don't know. You said, she's okay. And then David was like, excuse me? My boy, David, my sworn enemy came to my defense. Yeah, they're enemies. I know. It's disrespectful. But you know what? It's okay.

We don't have to talk about it. Listen, if I've wronged you, I apologize, Katie. I think you're fantastic. You gotta be built for war in these times of corona. Don't do that. Don't do that. I do not. I will be the positive voice that I always am. One of the most fun shows I've ever done in my whole life

was at the Bell House with you. Oh, now I just feel uncomfortable. Now people are changing the channel. Now people are going to listen to sports with Katie Nolan. The only other podcast available in these dark times. Sticks and stones.

Sticks and stones, you freaking bullies. I'm going to keep being a shining ray of light. I got your shining ray of light swinging. My first pick. I bet you do, dickweed. My first pick, and this is, I think as a kid,

I may have tried to eat this one time in a corner when nobody was looking. I'm picking caulk. Okay, that's so funny because I was going to do that too, and then I was like, they're going to think I said cock and I can't do that. I waited out in my head and I was like, it's worth the first pick. It looks so good. Cock looks delicious. It looks like it would taste like a lemon mousse.

Yeah, some of it looks like cookie doughy too. Yeah, it's all creamy though. Yeah, I just want to put. It's like frosting. Yeah, you want to put cock on doughy too. Yeah. Yeah. It's all creamy though. All. Yeah. I just want to put. It's like frosting. Yeah. You want to put cock on your ice cream. Yeah. Yeah.

A lot of these things are ended up being stuff that I want to put on other dishes and cock would be one of those things where I'm like, I do want to put that on. I didn't want to. Only me. I'm the only one who gets shit when I say cock. I thought I could rise above it, but I can't. You can put the cock directly in your mouth, but sometimes you want to put the cock on something else

and then eat it. And that's, you know, we don't kink shame. The first dude that ever took me on the road, his name was Chinaman. Have you put some cock anywhere? I'm serious. Say, hey, Sean, you know we're talking about like a product that they use for like walls and stuff, right?

Before you go any further with this story. He would bring a cock gun on stage. We're talking about like a product that they use for like walls and stuff right before you go any further with this story he would bring a cock gun on stage we're talking about home depot cock and not the kind that you're not the kind you pay for in the parking lot not the behind the home depot he would do the bit that you guys are all doing right now you guys are all doing the same bit the chinaman did he would bring a cop gun on stage and do this bit. Yeah, China Man's a legend. You don't think I know about his album, Kid Walk? You think I don't know? I know.

You know about China Man. I've been watching that dude on YouTube for years. Oh, God. He called himself China Man. He wasn't even Chinese, right? Isn't that right? Still isn't. Oh, my God.

That's so weird. That's so dumb. He's got comedy is so weird yeah uh yeah sometimes i just sprinkle things onto my caulk you know is this a cocaine jug it is now it's whatever you want it to be, baby. Kalk does look delicious, though. I remember our friends... Oh, shout out to Marty Michael, who is one of the members of HeadGum.

His family had a big shed where there was a lot of exposed kalk. In the shed? Get out of here. You'd be surprised how often that happens in a shed behind the house where no one's living that's like a lot of times that's the first place people expose their

cock is in a shed somewhere it's where I saw cock for the first time Sean you delivered that cock joke with all the enthusiasm of someone like at a Latin mass you know what I mean I'm also with you I was trying to get it out

and it's just i just remember thinking as a kid just like why can't i eat that that looks so incredible it looks like a like puffy cookie dough it's so delicious all i have to say before you leave me is balls nice nice nice any other cock jokes anyone wants to go I was working on one but I'm gonna we'll leave it I'll leave it all I have to say before you leave me is balls balls nice

nice sick Marissa do you want to get on this cock thing at all or are you good no I'll pass thank you alright

yeah yeah yeah the most polite person in the gangbang you want to hear this cock no thank you I'll pass thank you so much I had some call

I'm just here to watch mostly. I don't, if you need a hand, I'll give you a hand. I have dietary restrictions. It's not a big deal. I'll pass. I'm gluten free. It's just, and that's full. That looks like it's full of gluten.

Full of it. That's, I'm going to get sick from that. Cock is number one. Usually number one comes out of the cock, but this time. Hey. Hey. Oh man. My first pick is going to be

those lush bath bombs. Bath jelly looks delicious. Not the jelly, the bomb, those like... They look like a sour candy almost. They look like giant... Oh, like jawbreakers. Yeah, but they're like...

The fizzy joints. Yeah, you they're like all the fizzy joints. They look fizzy. Yeah, you throw them in a bath and it gets all fizzy and smells good. Yeah, I get that. Like you'd pluck it off a crazy looking flower. I get that for sure. Fantastic. I remember the first time I saw it, there was like a, it was that store Lush that makes the most delicious looking ones.

And there was one on 23rd Avenue in Portland and it was like opened right next to this old record store this music millennium and i remember walking by the window for the first time before i knew what it was and thinking like oh shit the candy game just changed forever and then and then looking up at the sign it was like soap ah fuck you know it was like one of those moments here's a question i've always i want to know for each of you for all of these things. Have you ever actually tried it? Tried it? Were you ever like, let me let me just

find out for myself. Some of this stuff. I'm not a bath taker. Unlike Sean Jordan, so I've never tasted, I've never even had a lush bath bomb. Me either. Oh yeah, have I ever had a bath bomb in the bath? Are you talking about trying to eat one? Trying to eat one. Oh, no. I've had plenty of bath bombs, if bath? Are you talking about trying to eat one? Oh, no. I've had plenty of bath bombs, if you know what I'm talking about. You have?

You didn't hear about this, Katie? He took baths until he was like 16. He's a bathman. Like, every day before school. Yeah, I used to take baths before school. You would wind down before school? I would get up. Yeah, I didn't take showers

until I started skateboarding, really. Okay. I would just take showers. I don't care. I don't. It's good. I'm going to leave it. I'm going to leave it.

We're already like an hour in, so I'm going to leave it. Yeah, we are. Love and light. May you be blessed. I appreciate it. I'm going to take a bath today after this when I wind up. You know what, Sean? I said I was going to fucking leave it.

Why do you have to do that? I'm just letting you know I'm going to take a bath today after this when I wind up. You know what, Sean? I said I was going to fucking leave it. Why do you have to do that? I'm just letting you know I'm going to take a bath. We've moved on. Everything was ecumenical. I'm back up on the camera. This is, it feels like we're friends. Yes, I missed you so much. It feels like we're friends.

Get the bejesus out of me. I love it. I love it so much. I want to take one quick second to get a shout out, if I can, in between picks, to Ryan Flannery, who's a big AFV fan and a firefighter in the portland area and uh extra shout out to christina as well to whom uh ryan is married shout out to both of them christina's a nurse and ryan is a firefighter they're essential as fuck they're extremely essential workers so big shout outs to both of you hope you're getting through this okay as okay as you can love shout outs to both of you. Hope you're getting through this okay, as okay as you can. Love and light to both of you.

Love and light. Live, laugh, love. Live, laugh, love. Yes. Rise and grind. You know, all the stuff you see on Instagram, to you. Absolutely. I drink one glass of wine a day, and then the picture

and it's a gigantic glass of wine the whole bottle fits into, so that to you as well. Yep. Katie Nolan, time for your first pick. Okay, with my first pick in the Forbidden Snacks draft, I'm going to take Paint Being Stirred. Yeah, it looks so good.

It looks so creamy. Looks like you could dip an ice cream cone in it. When they dip that up, when they change the color, when they put another color in. Yeah, man. When they do that right in front of you and it would just be perfect. When they dip that up, when they change the color, when they put another color in. Yeah, man. When they do that right in front of you and it's just like, you can't have this.

I think what I love the most about it is that it looks like, it doesn't really look like anything we currently have that's available to eat. Like it looks like melted ice cream, but a little bit thicker. It's almost like pudding, but not really.

It's just like so delicious. I want it so badly. It's all viscous you want to take one of those like uh it's such a delicious texture yeah i want to take one of those like boba tea straws and just dip it right in there you know just suck it right it's like a milkshake but it's a little bit thinner than that but it depends on the color if you got like a brown paint then it looks chocolatey but if it's like a light blue it's just this delicious i just want to eat all the paint have you yeah have you ever ate paint i've eaten a paint chip like i've like chipped paint off of something and eaten it before but have you ever huffed paint no oh yeah no me either i was just asking yeah i didn't i don't even know how you do it so yeah me either

what's happening so both of you guys definitely h pain. Yeah, right? So what is it? Isn't it like whippets, but more badass with more staining? It's worse than a whippet. Garages in Aurora, Colorado, you're gonna have some... Ask Dan. You're gonna have some pain. Garagi P. Henson over here? Garagi P. Henchman?

Because he's like... Oh, God. Oh, God. Myrtle doesn't like, oh, God. Oh, God. Myrtle doesn't find any of this funny. Oh, garage-y P. Henchman. Garage-y P. Henchman. I got to change my Twitter now. Garage-y P. Henchman. Yeah.

Garage-y P. Henchman. Oh, man. That is sick. That's so funny. Wait, so what is huffing paint? Yes, please go into it. It makes me feel like I got like a weird hot bead of sweat running down the crack of my ass.

It's weird. But how do you do it? It's a spray paint, right? You spray it into a bag and then you just put the bag and like kind of hyperventilate. It's just like when you're breathing it but you're just doing it straight into your body. I've never huffed anything. Oh, or you can huff. Yeah, you just spray it into a bag or like a cloth and then put it over your face and

I asked Dan if he's ever done it. He responded, what? Or you can huff, yeah, you just spray it into a bag or like a cloth and then put it over your face. I asked Dan if he's ever done it. He responded, what? And then he said, no, that's for bridge trolls. Bridge town, baby. Population me. That's for henchmen. That's for henchmen.

For garage-y henchmen. Yeah, for sure. I've never huffed anything. I just want to drink it. I just want to drink it. I just want to drink it like that big glass of wine from that Instagram. Right after quarantine. Just glug, glug, glug right out of the penis. Okay.

You did describe, the way you described it sounded unpleasant, like sweat dripping down the crack of your ass. I've huffed like three different times and I never liked it. All under the age of 20, by the way. It wasn't like... Jesus, formative brain years. You know what this could have been? You know what this fucking could have been? Yeah, I mean, it's still a beautiful thing. Yeah, you're doing all right.

I can read. Sean, shut up. Sean, time for your first and second picks, as it is a serpentine draft. My first pick, I'm going to pick Tide Pods. Of course. Absolutely perfect. They just look like candy.

I'm just kidding. She called you a hacktivist, bro. I'm just kidding, Sean. I'm just kidding. He really wasn't smiling, and I got really sad. Sean, I'm just fucking with you, dude. Tide Pods, delicious. Marissa, take all that out. Take all that out where she said she was fucking with me i can't have any of that dog these you know we're on i'm kidding i'm kidding yeah no of course

i mean yeah it's an easy pick i apologize i was gonna pick paint that was the that was gonna be the front runner tide pod has to go it's just just going to go somewhere. It looks like future ravioli. I get it. I have a weird one for the later rounds. But yeah. Well, let's talk about the one you just picked. Tide Pods. I want it. I haven't.

They weren't around. I'd be lying if I said I've never been a Tide Pod. I've put it in my mouth and like, yeah, yeah. I've done that just to see how much it would take for me to buy through it. But i've i've put it in my mouth and like yeah yeah just to see how much it would take for me to break through it but i've never gotten through it no they weren't around if i was a kid when they were real i would have eaten one but we just had fucking detergent like real detergent and i've drank that you know i would chug 40 mule team borax. Chug it. You know that scene in The Lion King when Timon and Pumbaa find Simba

and they're like... I sure do. During Hakuna Matata and they're eating all those bugs. The grubs. Yeah, the grubs. And they're all like thick and juicy and everything. Those were some juicy...

That's what a Tide Pod looks like. You're absolutely right. That's a great point. Some freak pic ass bug. That was bug freak pic. Yeah, you're absolutely right. That's a great point. That was bug freak Nick.

They do look compelling. The texture to me. They look compelling. It's the colors and the texture and the little bite size. It's fun size. It's so fun. It looks like it packs a lot of punch in one because you're like, there's three colors here.

Yeah, big ass gusher ass looking laundry fucking detergent. It's so fun. It looks like it packs a lot of punch in one because you're like, there's three colors here. Yeah. Big ass gusher ass looking laundry fucking detergent. It also looks like those gummy snacks that had like the white on the bottom and the colorness on the top. I don't remember. I feel like they were shark shaped. Sharks?

The shark ones. Oh, no, no, you might be right. Yeah. The sharks ones. They had a few different that had sort of that format. There were sharks. Yeah, it was like an interesting format that I enjoyed a lot. Oh, I love a white bottom gummy.

I love a white bottom gummy. I don't know why that felt so racist. I felt so. A white bottom gummy? Yeah. It's like a lady with no ass. She's a white bottom gummy.

Oh, you said it. You said it. Yeah, I did. I did. I did. Just so everybody knows. I have nothing to do. I love the no ass community

and I'd like that on record right now. This town is full of man wells and white bottom gummies. I'm going to fix it and start it round up. It's a hot corner. Oh yeah, hot corner. Sean, Tide Pod your first pick.

Your second pick. My second pick is going to be a tie-dyed foam roller. Oh, that's very specific very specific i think it looks like a weird tie-dyed angel food cake and i really want it every time laura's got one and every time she gets it out i'm just like man that looks like it'd be fun to take a little bite out of so you're just picking stuff that's in that basement you're in right yeah yeah you're gonna fucking kaiser so Say this whole job. His next one's going to be an iMac. You don't want to eat an iMac? Doesn't that iMac look creamy?

It looks fun. I'm picking Pea Poppers. Tie-dye foam roller. It looks like... Tie-dye foam roller. Looks like angel food cake to me. I like Rollzer. I'm actually in on that.

Sounds like a bad guy in Mario. Browser. Rollzer. Yeah, actually in on that. Sounds like a bad guy in Mario. Rollzer. Rollzer. Yeah, I don't have a lot. I use a foam roller. Ooh, that feels good. Yeah, it does. I've been using one like crazy.

Yeah. I can't picture a tie-dye foam roller. Yeah, it's like a marbled foam roller. It does look like it would be fun to bite into, like a big string of licorice almost. Yeah. I mean, I guess. Sure. foam roller it doesn't think it would be fun to bite into like a big string of licorice almost yeah i mean i guess sure there's so many other things you could still pick beef dude well it's a good thing that there's uh

16 more picks beef bro 17 16 beef dog katie what's your second pick is it better than a tie-dye foam roller we're about to find out fiberglass insulation oh yeah damn that shit looks good damn it fuck that was gonna be my next pick vivid memories of my cousin's family renovating their house and them showing me the attic and the attic was just like you know slats of wood and then this pink fluffy cotton candy shit that my dad was like, do not touch it. I'm like, then why does it look like that? She's asking for it. I'm going to eat her. Whoa.

It looks. It looks like candy. It looks so fucking good. And then when they tell you that it's fiberglass, so it's going to be a little, I'm like, crunchy? It is going to be crunchy. If you added a little bit of crunch to a cotton candy, I'd love that. Now you're making me bit of crunch to a cotton candy I'd love that

now you're making me want it even more congratulations it's like a crunchy cotton candy yeah I want to eat it so bad attics are just full of cock and fucking insulation it's just like a forbidden snack zone up there it's such a delicious dangerous situation Home Depot was a problem for me

I was treated like a bug you're gonna go up in that attic and catch diabetes. And it's like if you took a bite of a foam roller or if you had a little bit of paint, you'd be fine. You'd be fine. But if you ate fiberglass insulation, that's rough. That's going to be a little bummer. You've got a problem. If you live, you're living and carrying on some real damaged DNA.

You're going to cough into a damp rag for the rest of your life. You know what I mean? You're going to Doc Holliday until you die. Hey, don't call her that. It's... This damp rag over here. This white bottom gummy. It's a real damp rag.

That's my down bottom white bottom gummy. Oh, God. I worked as a plumber's assistant for one day and then quit immediately the next day when I was 16. But I've told the story before, so forgive me. But what we did the one day I worked was we were pulling out of the plumbing out of a halfway house.

Oh, my God. And the copper wiring was already gone. Long gone. Mess. Long gone. And we were pulling out these like fiberglass showers. So not quite an installation,

but like the same, same deal basically. Yeah. And it got into like the, I didn't, I was wearing short sleeves and it got into my arms and it burned so bad

for like 48 hours because it just gets into your skin. Yeah, I've had it, I've had it on my forearms before, yeah. That shit sucks. It is a bummer.

Still want to eat it, guys. You're making it sound really bad. I'm still going to eat some of it before I die. Probably all my deathbed. Yeah, if you're going out anyways, why not figure it out? Yeah, let it carve me all the way down, down my throat. It also had a cartoon mascot like it was a food. Yeah, why did it have Pink Panther?

Why was there Pink Panther on it? That makes me want it more. Also, the guy that sold it in our town, not in a weird way, had puppies that he dyed pink, which now I know you're not supposed to do. It's very, very weird. But you would go to the insulation place and they would give you, there'd be these little puppies, these pink puppies you could play with. I'm like, this is my heaven.

I want to eat that and play with that. That guy sounds like a Tiger King type of fella. Yeah, I think he's probably in jail or dead. He's either in jail or dead at this point. Or rich. Or rich. Or he runs Google or something. I don't know.

He's in there with the boob site guy. Insulation, amazing pick. Also, why's it got to be pink? Does it like... Sometimes it's yellow. Oh, yeah, that's true. Sometimes it's yellow. I still want it. I'll still eat it. Oh, it's time for my next pick. It it like... Sometimes it's yellow. Oh, yeah, that's true. Sometimes it's yellow. I still want it. I'll still eat it.

Oh, it's time for my next pick. It's like Peeps. It only comes in Peeps colors. It does only come in Peeps colors. Strange choice. Delicious Pastels. Which is... I answered that name in several different cities. If you're in Santa Fe and you want to know about... Ask about Delicious Pastels. I mean, honestly, if you're in Santa Fe and you want to ask about delicious pastels.

I mean, honestly, if you're in Santa Fe, you don't have to ask. There's a memo that comes out when he gets to town. Somebody's going to tell you delicious pastels is back. I'm the mayor of Santa Fe, New Mexico. Delicious pastels. And I'm selling my intent to Georgia Tech. Delicious pastels car runs on like, he has kite energy. He has like a kite that goes up in the air.

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. It's real smooth. Delicious Pastels wears silk kung fu pants, I feel like. Ooh. Ooh. Silk. My second pick is Hot Lava. Ooh.

Oh, that's such a good pick. Yeah. So good. I just want to scoop it up and eat it and there couldn't be more dangerous oh man yeah it looks so good those pictures were like the top of its ash but some of the red starting to leak out what i just want to know what it feels like is it more solid than liquid is it more liquid than solid it's obviously hot but it's delicious but it's so compelling. I just want to, yeah, you just want to like dig your hands into it. Yeah.

I know what you mean. Yeah. It just looks so good. I would love to eat some hot lava right now. There's a scene where like in The Simpsons when he's doing that like hot chili episode that like Johnny Cash does and he voices a coyote. Oh, yeah. When he's wandering the desert.

Oh yeah. And they pull these hot peppers out of it and they're like, they're hot peppers that look like magma and I'm like, I just want to eat it. I want to eat that. It looks fantastic. It's perfect. Like you could put it like you'd get it on a dessert at a Brazilian restaurant you've never heard of. They say they have hot lava cake

to replicate the hot chocolate coming out of, but I want it to be red like that. It doesn't work. It doesn't work at all. You want real lava. I need that weird consistency. Like where it's like, maybe it would be worth it.

Maybe I should try it. I want to have to. Yeah, you know what? Just take a bite. I'm going to have to eat it before it cools. You got to get yourself lava lamp lava. I think that's cool. Lava lamp lava?

Is it hot? Lava lamp lava. Is it hot? Lava lamp lava. Is it hot is a good question. Are you asking if lava lamps have hot lava in them? I'm gonna die. I'm gonna die if that's what you're asking. I'm asking if it's hot. I'm not asking if it's hot lava. Don't try to force something stupid to come out of my mouth. It'll come out on its own.

I don't think lava lamps have hot lava in them, David. I'm asking if the shit in a lava lamp. But they do get warm, don't they? Yeah, they do get warm. They get warm to the touch. That's what I'm asking. The two lava lamp owners have entered the chat.

They are warm. They're warm lamps. They're both warm and close to a Hansen poster. Those are the two things about them. It's so true. It's so true. But look, I just recently watched Dante's Peak, and boy, my stomach is rumbling that whole time.

I was like, look at that delicious lava that he drives over with his rubber tires somehow. He sure does. Hot lava. David, time for your second and third picks. As tis. Oh, okay. As twas.

This one is really specific, but I think you guys just allow me to walk you down the road and you'll get it do you remember back in the 90s chevron had these commercials where they had these animated cars yes those i wanted to eat those hold on let me get a picture of this chevron chevron it was the same animator that did like Wallace and Gromit It looked delicious It is Wallace and Gromit cars Those do look delicious

The rounded corners and stuff Yeah but then you know that they have the circuitry Or whatever the mechanical stuff inside So there'll be a crunch Oh yeah They kind of look just like the cars from Cars To put it in perspective for yeah yeah but yeah those things oh man i wanted to eat the but it makes you feel like

as a boy you feel like a psycho because you're like those are you know they're talking like oh yeah why do i want to eat a lot like not even like like it could communicate that it didn't want me to eat it and I was still Big, please stop! Because in my head I was eating it alive. Yeah, were you going to start like in the stomach like a psycho? I wasn't going to eat it. You want me to grill it? It looked like you just take a bite out of it.

Where'd you start? The head or the ass? That's what I'm saying. You're going to eat it like a hyena? I would start at the head so it quit talking to me. I have a wife. I have children. That's what I'm saying. You can eat it like a hyena. I would start at the head so it quit talking to me. I have a wife. I have children. That's Sean's whole philosophy. That's why he looks at the porn without it, you know? Don't even let the head be there in the first place.

I came to the Chevron to just fill up on my gas so I could take my kids to car practice. Please don't eat me. Please don't eat me. But I'm like, I'm crunched through already. David's got car guts all over his face. I don't give a fuck about your family. You just ate that fucking semi truck. Are you even hungry anymore?

Are you bored? Wicked wiper fluid off my hands. Oh, God. While all the others watch, it's like a bunch of other cars. You poor, unfortunate souls. Oh, man. Chevron cars, that's an amazing thing. Oh, man. Chevron cars.

That's an amazing pick. Yeah, yeah. That's fantastic. Good on you. My next one, and this is also automotive and pretty weird, like a brand new Harley Davidson. What are you talking about, David? I don't know how to explain it. This is a problem now.

This is a weird now. Yeah. This is a weird thing. It wasn't weird with Chevron cars. It was specific and cute. And now it's weird. Is that weird? That's, oh, oh, fuck me now? That's what it is?

Yeah. Not even a little bit. I'm trying to tell you how I fucking feel. This is like, this is like, has to be like, this isn't for AFV. This is for true life.

Is that not? Yeah, this is, this is one of those, my weird obsessions where you're like, I fuck my car when no one's looking. Take away, take away everything.

You got to take away everything you know. You strip away everything you know. I'm going to Google brand new Harley Davidson right now. And I'm going to see. If it looks even a little bit delicious? If you could just walk up and take a taste, it would... Okay. What would it taste like, David?

I don't really... Go ahead, David. It's all chrome. Like, super... You want to eat cars that can talk, and then you think this is nicer because this one can't talk? It can't talk back. It's so silent. I imagine it would taste like...

No, I don't want to eat that. That doesn't look good at all to you. No. Really? No. I just want to bite the front wheel off. What? I don't really know.

I don't know what. I don't... A brand new Harley Davidson. Listen, man. I love it. I'm just... Can we just make sure that no other... None of your next picks are cars or like any...

No, we can't make sure of that. That's my list and I'll do what I want with it. A 2004 Nissan Sentra. Damn, I had a 2002 Nissan Sentra and you do want to eat it. I'll tell you that right now. I don't want to eat drug dealer cars. Yeah, you do.

But it had a spoiler on it though. If you have a Nissan, you sell drugs. That's just the rule. Oh, man. I didn't sell them. I might have driven them around, but I didn't sell them. This is the kind of pick where in three months, you're like, yeah, I had an iron deficiency. That makes perfect sense.

I don't really. I mean, in hindsight, I don't know how to. Especially when the engine's revving hot and's like kind of dripping out of the i don't know don't try to make it don't try to paint me a picture i don't know why this is listen i'm sorry i thought that i could talk to my friends begging you i thought i could talk to my friends okay david please please what if it's a bmw No? Yeah, still. Okay. I thought maybe you only liked that American chrome. No, no, no. I mean, I want a Honda.

I'll eat a Honda CBR. Like a crotch rocket. Like a Kawasaki Ninja. Yeah. Is this crazy? Is this that crazy? I would almost, I would eat a Kawasaki Ninja over a Harley Davidson because at least they're like neon green and you're like, oh, maybe that's sour apple.

I don't know. Chrome looks delicious to me, too. I think chrome looks really good. Chrome looks like it's chrome flavored. Well, like hot melted chrome. Okay. Yeah, like the, oh, that's a good one. So we're coming around.

Okay, but I wouldn't eat a motorcycle. On the list of things I've made, I have a very long list in front of me. I'm not saying that I'm going to eat it. I didn't even make maybe motorcycle if we run out of options. You guys are talking like I'm saying I've eaten a motorcycle. Just since we just said it, I would eat like Alex Mack when she was just like a puddle. Oh my God, I would absolutely eat Alex Mack when she turned into a puddle. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Alex Mack and cheese.

When she's of legal age, of course. Of course. Just to be fair, as I said, it's like, I think she was in high school, so I don't think I would be able to eat. We need an 18 year old Larissa Olnick. Are you allowed to eat adults?

Is that? Oh, no, I just mean saying I'm going to eat a wet Larissa Olnick is, it feels like I should, or Olenick, whatever her name was, feels like I should just clarify.

Cause she was in high school during that show that everyone would be consenting. Is it my turn? I pick up what you're putting down. Thank you. It's my turn. But I'm a fucking animal because I want to eat. You're talking,

Katie's talking about eating underage girls. You picked a motorcycle. Katie's talking about eating underage girls. I said a motorcycle. Once they reach legal age. I'm a monster?

I'm a monster? Hold on. Yes. Hold on. Yes they reach legal age. I'm a monster? I'm a monster? Hold on. Yes. Hold on. Yes. This is crazy. With my third pick, I'm taking erasers. No.

Totally. No. Are we talking freestanding or off the back of pencils? No, we're talking about these guys. Yes. This is exactly what we're talking about. I mean, Lisa Frank ass, colorful. Sometimes they were like in the shape of fruit.

Sometimes they're in the shape of like cakes and candies, unicorns, kittens, rainbows. Man, I just wanted to scoop handfuls up. Like book fairs, just like a scoop, a handful. I tried. Yeah, I've eaten one. I've eaten those before for sure. Absolutely have eaten them too.

They're gross. The taste is gross. The texture is so satisfying that if they made a food like that it would be even more over for me than it already is. They are

so fucking delicious looking. Man, that's such a good pick. Lisa Frank used to make a bunch of those and they're so colorful. Everything that Lisa Frank made looks delicious. Yeah, that's true. Even those unicorns. I don't know who Lisa Frank used to make a bunch of those. Everything that Lisa Frank made looks delicious. Yeah, that's true. That's true. Even those unicorns.

I don't know who Lisa Frank is. Did you ever have a friend? Okay, I can narrow this down. Were you friends with any horse girls? No. Okay. Did you know any girls that wore butterfly clips in their hair? Yeah, sure.

Cool. The folder she had. That was Lisa Frank. It was like purple, pink, yellow, unicorns, flying things, sparkly. What if I had some of those? Then that is your choice. Judging by everything you told me you wore as a child, I would not be surprised. You had those, yeah. I started getting

binders with kittens on them in middle school first out of necessity because I waited and that's all they had left that shit no I never had any of those but those are dope there'd be like a dolphin jumping out of a rainbow and shit like that it was beautiful it was magical just really stunning

stuff even like those pink erasers also look delicious if you got me in the right mood like gum they look like bubble gum. I would chew those a lot of times anyway, like the eraser off a pencil. I'd get them in the back on the molar. Get your molars on them.

I would chew the metal off on those too. Sean, but you were also an at-risk youth so that's... I'd chew them like a big ol' stick of bubble gum. Big ol' stick of bubble gum. Big old stick of bubble gum. I like it when people mean to say bubble gum, but it sounds like bubble gum.

That's how I know I can chew. Big old stick of bubble gum. Just eat it like a motorcycle, you know? Just eat the whole thing. Just like I would a motorcycle. I stand on it. I eat it like a motorcycle. I stand on it.

I stand on it. I think it looks good. Katie, time for your third pick. Okay, this is a tough one. But I think with my next pick, I'm going to go with Orbeez. What? What are Orbeez? What are Orbeez?

Also known as super absorbent polymers. So they're these tiny little- Now I know what you're talking about. Sure. You'll know. You will know. You can either use them for planting soil, or you like they make little kids toys. Those are called Orbeez.

They're like these tiny little beads that start. They look like salt, essentially. And you put them in water and they turn into these big like globules. Is that are you saying words? They're like this. Are you saying like turn into these? Oh, yes. Oh, yeah.

Yeah. OK. So like there was a there's a video. It's actually pretty funny. You can find a video of a French guy put a bunch of it into a tub and it filled the tub and then it went into the drain pipes and it like ruined the sewage system of his entire neighborhood. It was like coming.

They were coming out of the ground and out of his sink. It's they're insane. That's why we call them freedom fries. But it looks like a wizard factory exploded in the they're like these and i don't understand them because they're like if you smush them too like gently they hold a perfect circle shape but if you smush them really hard they break so they're like jello but they're not and there's just gel in there yeah yeah kind of it's really weird what do they use i think it's when you like uh stuff and you pour it and you like water your plants. It's like they absorb the excess.

Okay. I've spent days Googling these before because I'm like, I don't understand. And I still don't really know. Because you're like, are they sure I can't eat them? Yeah. I think I want to eat one. Kinda. But they're wild.

That would be the closest I'd come to eating anything mentioned so far as those things because they look exactly like candy. Exactly like it. You don't want to eat a motorcycle? You sure? What are those called? Orbeez. They do look like futuristic Fruity Pebbles.

Yeah. Yeah. They just look delicious because the kids' ones are really colorful. They're like all different colors. Yeah, those are the ones I just looked up and they did just looks like a bowl of candy that you'd have out if you're having like a picnic a picnic if you will. If you will or even if you won't. This says

25 million Orbeez in a backyard pool. Like what? Let me eat that. Yeah. Let me eat that. Let me just it's like a ball pit that you can eat. Do you know what you have to make sure you do if you're around a bunch of Orbeez? What?

Or behave. Oh, okay. All right. So Orbeez is my third pick. I like it with Orbeez sauce on it. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Orbeez, we have the super absorbent polymers. That's a Pusha t song uh making that what yeah making that the second uh national fast food

jingle pusha t has been involved in oh the first being mcdonald's exactly that's right i'm selling cash sean time for your third and fourth picks my third pick is going to be edge shaving gel good uh you guys ever used the edge stuff is that the turquoise one yeah and it looks like like barbasol it comes out yeah yeah yeah it just comes you can shoot it out it goes out like two feet and it looks like that that like tube icing wait are you talking about the one that comes out and is gel and you rub into cream are you talking about okay yeah yeah yeah yeah. So I'll cross shaving cream off my list. That looks like gel.

Well, I mean, I'm taking the gel form, but yeah. Yeah, but the cream looks like the soft... It's like Cool Whip, but even softer. Like minty cream. I have wanted to eat shaving cream on multiple occasions. Because it looks like whipped cream. It's on a body. It looks like

it's candy. It's supposed to be. What was the first part? It's on a body. It looks like it's candy. It's supposed to be. It's on a body. It's on a body? That's what makes it look like whipped cream? That's what you're putting whipped cream on? It's on a body. Oh my God.

Can I eat that shaving cream off your body? First of all, it's on a body. Chris's face looks so bummed. I'm super bummed. Excuse me. Get on the couch and put your body next to me. Oh, fuck. All right.

You're awful. All right. All right. All right. Go back to the gel part. David, how's your body during quarantine? Don't talk to me. I don't want you to talk to me. I'm going to go get a fresca because I'm fucked up over this.

Put it on your body. Paul, stop it. I'm here voluntarily. Katie asked to be here. Please stop. Ed's shaving gel. It comes out. It looks like the tube icing you put on a birthday cake, and it looks really good.

It does look delicious. And I think I actually have accidentally eaten a little bit of that while shaving. What flavor do you think it looks like? I don't know. Blueberry? Yeah, like a blue raspberry. Or blue raspberry. Yeah, blue raspberry. Since we're just talking about shaving, going back to

the shaving cream, which is not what you picked, but since we're talking about it, it makes a way more satisfying noise than whipped cream coming out, too. Yeah, because it's like a bit soft. Sean, and your fourth pick? My fourth pick is going to be sea foam. I think it looks delicious.

Ew, wait. Sorry. Sea foam. Isn't that the thing where it just looks like spit? No, like foamy. It looks like the froth that you would put in like a coffee drink to me. Body froth. Oh, boy.

Our tastes could not be further. First of all, it's on a body. First of all, it's on a body. Seafoam always looks dirty, I feel like. Yeah, it looks like cat spit. Well, like a clean sea. Not like a seafoam in like a shitty river or something, but like a seafoam in the ocean that hasn't had a chance to get dirty yet.

It's just fluffy and foamy. Coastal elite seafoam. That's right puffy and foamy. Coastal elite sea foam. That's right. L.A. Sea Foam. That was his first crypt name. L.A. Sea Foam. L.A. Sea Foam. What was the pastels? What was the pastels? Was it dangerous?

No. Delightful? Delicious pastels. Yeah, delicious pastels. Ofels yeah delicious pastels yeah dude delicious of the boston pastels yeah seafoam seafoam if it's got a little bit of that brown in it it doesn't look good because like sometimes it does but like i see what you're saying some fresh seafoam clean seafoam put it in a drink this is the one thing that i get to put in a drink i'm putting

it in my coffee and it's just going to be on top like a frothy treat. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Uh, Seafoam, Katie, time for your fourth pick. I have a very Sean Jordan pick. Oh, so it's dope,

huh? No, it's like dumb and might not count. I didn't pick a motorcycle. You didn't. But technically i didn't pick a motorcycle i did it but technically technically you cannot eat a motorcycle no no it fits it fits what you do so you'll pick ones that you're like well that doesn't really count like david's is weird and creepy but it counts david picked a ball pit we were can i say this one and you guys can make a ruling on it? And if not, I've got others.

We'll make a jar. We'll make a jar ruling on it. Because if it's. If it's. What would I do without my babies? If it's something we want to eat that we cannot eat. The pizza. The pizza from Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles.

Oh, the cartoon pizza? Yeah, that's fine. I had. Cartoon pizza. Yeah, I had a goofy movie pizza on mine. That's fine. That's totally fine. Daria pizza. All the shows that had like really good pizza. I know what you're talking about.

For some reason, the cheese is like a texture that we don't get in reality. And it's like stretches in a way. There's never too much sauce. Yeah, it's never mad saucy. I know exactly. Yeah, I totally get that.

It's not like technically, you know what I mean? Like we can eat pizza, but I can't eat that pizza. And I want to. I'll allow. We'll allow it, right? Yeah, of course. Because you don't have to. I've got a whole list.

I've got plenty of others. That's a good one. David, do you want to make a jaw ruling on it? I give it. I give it holla holla, you know, let it play out. All right, great. Sean, jaw ruling? Yeah, I'll give it a thumbs up on the jaw rule scale.

Jaw ruling. Perfect, yeah. Jaw ruling approved. Cart the jaw rule skill jaw ruling yeah jaw ruling improved cartoon pizza thank you so much yeah it does look so good i swear i've had pizza at some point where i was like that tastes like it yeah same because i can taste it in my mouth when i think about it then i'm like oh that reminds me of it but i have no idea when or where i ate it me neither it was fascinating like from my youth is that what chucky cheese pizza is like i feel like when you get pizza right out of the oven and you pull it up and like a kid you pull it out and it's like got the cheese dripping like i never get to the pizza when it's right out of the oven anymore good point yeah yeah i'm just old extra it's it's extra cheese for sure so much the ninja turtles would always put weird shit on there right they'd be like jelly beans anchovies and like well i just like because they just like they didn't really have tea like they were they had teas but it was more like a

like any pizza that you can just go like and you chew it they're like whoa that's that's awesome yeah it just looks so good first thing we're doing after teen is going and getting some cartoon pizza. Yeah, let's go, dude. If there was a pizza place. I'm never going to eat a motorcycle, David. Don't look. You just want to fucking hang out with my friends. Fuck you, man.

Jeez Louise. Fuck you, man. Machinery gets me hungry. I don't know what you want me to say. Okay, time for my fourth pick. With my fourth pick, I'm going to take antifreeze. Yeah, dude. I've gotten some in my mouth before.

It tastes better than you think. That's why you can't have it by dogs, because they'll eat it because it's sweet. Oh, shit. They love it, right? It's a compelling color. It's like that lime green, like electric. Yeah, this one's fucked up because you actually it does taste how you want it to it smells good i bet it tastes like kind of maple syrup i got like so my uh what was it my

radiator was kicking back for a while i had to put in a new one but uh i was a kid i didn't know so i opened it before it cooled down like you know I had like a rag and I just kept doing it kept doing it and finally and I got a whole face full and anti-freeze pretty good

oh no I'm actually tasting like those little remember those kids drinks that looked like hand grenades those were so good little huggies I'm picturing it tasting like those little, remember those kids drinks that looked like hand grenades? Oh, yes. Those were so good. The little huggies. Yeah. They were like.

Is that what it tasted like? Sort of like hot that. Hot that? Those things were like three cents. You remember that? Like at the corner store? Yeah, you could get like a hundred for a dollar or something. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Nuts. Those were nuts. They were barely flavored. It was probably industrial runoff that they were like, legally we can sell this. Yeah, yeah, yeah. We just got to call them little huggies. The top was just like tinfoil that I would chew through with my teeth. It was definitely juice drink.

Yeah. Yeah, dude. Oh, wait, wait. Did you know that, what's it called? Is antifreeze, isn't it? Wow. She's nailing it. Fireball.

What? Really? They couldn't sell it in certain countries because a percentage of it was antifreeze. That's probably not the fact, but I can Google it. Really? This sounds like one of those Mountain Dew makes your wiener small things. No, it lowers your sperm count. Yellow 15 or whatever.

We know Mountain Dew doesn't make your wiener small because i drank a ton of mountain dew as a kid and you have a huge wiener don't you i meant to i meant to do that joke different i meant to say we know mountain dew doesn't make your wiener small because i've never had mountain dew fireball whiskey ingredient in antifreeze doesn't worry u.s officials there's an ingredient that's found in antifreeze that is also in fireball whiskey i mean my god at this point what does worry u.s official propylene glycol fucking nothing propylene glycol propylene glycol that makes it hella shit sweet yeah that's in a lot of stuff

like look it up look up uh common uses for propylene glycol it's in tons of shit propylene glycol is an accepted synonym for tilda swinton by the way yeah i saw that movie with propylene glycol in it and you're like oh i love her how was it bad also bolivians like it if you call him that Not bad. Also, Bolivians like it if you call them that. My provolink-like-all brother. David, time for your fourth and final picks. My fourth pick is a geode.

Remember those things? Hell yeah. Hell yeah. Looks like rock candy. Yeah, it looks perfect. Looks so good. So good. Like better than, like nature's candy.

I fucking need a geode. Yeah. And then my fifth pick is, feel like I don't I once felt like this was a safe space. I don't feel like that anymore. It's still safe. It's still safe. I'm going to tell you what I feel, though, and then you can judge me all you want. I think that a pillow top mattress looks delicious. Yes.

Yeah, sure. It looks like a motorcycle. No, not more delicious than a motorcycle. That's why I drafted it fifth. It looks like you could like... Yeah, you had to take it early so that none of us took a motorcycle. I don't know what you put in your mouths. I don't pretend to.

Yes, you do. Apparently it's not good shit. Yeah, I just want to bite a slice out of it like a cake i think it looks good pillow top mattress it's time for my final pick i'm going to take uh fabuloso cleaner oh my god it looks so good it's so good like some crazy like elderberry flavor or some shit yeah Fabuloso looks delicious. Fabuloso looks so good.

It looks like straight uncut slurpy syrup. You know what I wanted in? I wanted it in a pitcher with ice, like the Kool-Aid pitcher. Like dripping. Oh, yeah. Fabuloso. You run it in from playing outside. Busting through the door. It even looks like it comes in a 20-ouncer.

Look at that. It looks like it's supposed to be candy. Why is it that color? It should not be that color. Dude, there's lavender, blue, pink, and red. Those are all the best flavors. Only the shit you want to drink is what it is. There's green.

Wow. Lemon. Damn, dude. Oh, yeah. Good job. Hell, yeah. Thank you very much. I bet you if we cut it with water,

you could take a swig and be okay. I think our concept, having the amount of time we've spent at the Roost, we probably could take down Fabuloso. I was going to say, I bet you I've had some in one of their glasses. I just watched an intervention where this guy was drinking hand sanitizer.

Okay, so yeah, it's in play. Yeah, it was fucked up. In this economy? No, this was like, I mean, it was interventions. It was probably like five years ago. Okay. Fabuloso, delicioso. Katie, time for your final pick. Oh man, this was like, I mean, it was Interventions. It was probably like five years ago. Okay. Fabuloso, delicioso. Katie, time for your final pick.

Oh, man, this is really hard, because I got a couple on here that I really would eat. You know, Yamaha's Harley Davidson's, but I think I'm going to go with, I think I'm going to go with, God damn. All right, you know the clay that you used in like art class philo yeah philo dough right yeah i forget what it's called but you would like try to you'd have to it was almost

like a mix between a stick of butter and like a soft cheese completely and it would just like come off and it looked so it was really hard right yeah it was like it wasn't super hard but you could like mold it into stuff but it was like modeling clay yeah yeah so delicious and it looked like you're just like oh i'll peel off a yellow and i'll eat that one yeah just a little bit it looks so fucking good i played with that i would be down to like get some of that right now and fuck around with it yeah right uh-huh yeah let's get let's all get some clay do Do some clay work. I'm going to make a clay FE family. Wow.

Call me Clay Travis because I'm going to be up in here. I'm going to eat my bar cart. I'm going to be, you can call me Gary Moldman after this. You know what I mean? What is I'm going to eat my bar cart? How does that factor in? I mean, working up to the motorcycle okay

there's also no booze on it so it's like you know no boo no boo no boo no boo it was just the pure the pureness of the silence oh i was looking at it. And he said, I'm going to eat my bar cart. And then he said. Yeah, it's fucked up because you think that your friends see the world the same way you do. And then something like this happens and you're like. We were all making clay puns. Everybody was making a clay pun. And you're like, I'm going to eat my bar cart.

I'm going to eat my bar cart. I guess it was more of a declaration than it was like a riff. Oh, my God. It was a whole new chapter. Yeah, it was. You were on the same page of a different book. Holy shit, that was funny. I'm going to eat my bar card.

I'm going to eat my bar card. You might as well call me Frito Clay. I'm going to eat my bar card. It was so funny. That was so good. And it was the best was because it was before Sean got his pun out. So he was like, I'm trying to go back to the bit. We're like, sorry, sorry, sorry.

Are you going to eat your bar cart? If you guys saw it right now, I bet it does look delicious. I'm going to eat my bar cart. Oh, my God. My stomach hurts. Sean, time for your final pick, the final pick of the draft. You can call me Mold Yeller.

Alright, alright. What if you just made your pick, Sean? Jesus fucking Christ. We got stuff to do. Jesus Christ. Skateboard bushings. You guys know what the bushings are? You know we don't. You know that we don't. I don't know what the... I like my skateboards clean shaven. You know what I'm saying? There's the bushing Look up skateboard bushings. I like my skateboards clean shaven.

You know what I'm saying? There's the bushings. The bushings are in the trucks, which are the things that hold the wheels to the board. I know what you're talking about. The bushings are what makes the board so you can turn, and they look delicious. They're just like rubbery kind of looking things.

Can you pull up a picture of it on that old computer behind you there? Yeah. Why don't you pull start that iMac? Why don't you dial into the internet and show me what you there? Why don't you pull start that iMac? Why don't you dial into the internet and show me what you got? This is what a skateboard bushing looks like. That's what they look like. Oh, that looks delicious. They look like little candies.

Those aren't just wheels? Those look like the wheels. No, those are, well, they look a lot like the wheels, but they're different. But picking the wheels would have made you look like an insider who really knows skateboarding. That's something one of you would have picked. Right. We could have picked wheels.

Yeah, we're basic. Yeah, the bushings on a skateboard. So, yeah, that's my last pick. It's a good one. Thank you. So, to recap, David, you went first. You took Kalk and then Chevron cars and then a brand new Harley Davidson motorcycle. Oh, yeah.

Oh, yeah. And then geodes, and then a pillow top mattress. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Questionable. I went second. I took a lush bath bomb, hot lava, erasers, antifreeze, and fabuloso. Great picks.

Fabuloso is delicious. Katie Nolan, you went third, and you took, oh my God, my handwriting. my god my handwriting paint being stirred paint being stirred that's right i was like pant i was like can't boy paint being stirred insulation orbeez cartoon pizza and modeling clay. Sean, you went last. You took Tide Pods, a Tideye foam roller, Edge shaving gel, sea foam, and then skate bushings.

Yeah, dude. Skate bushings, dude. Kate bushings. We left a lot of good stuff on the board. I don't even know. Tulips, I think, look delicious. Smooth rocks. What'd you get? Snowy mountains.

So when they have snow on it and it looks like chocolate with powdery sugar. Clouds. Clouds look delicious. I had a human lung on there. A human lung? A human lung looks pretty good to me. Oh, but I'm fucked up. Wait, wait, wait.

Okay, but David's a psychopath. David's crazy. Wait, wait, wait, wait. Okay, but David's a psychopath. David's crazy. Sean, Sean, did you just in the basement with a, surrounded by a bunker say that you would like to eat a human lung? Yeah, man, you gotta be more honest than that. No, we're not moving on to marbles. We're staying on, you wanna eat a human lung.

I think it looks like it's good. You can eat the lung of any animal. Why would you pick a human? I think they look good. I looked. I searched lungs last night. I think human lungs look good. I googled human lungs and my mouth watered. And then he's got marbles.

It's a normal thing You googled human lungs You were like But what's under those perfect boobs? How do we go deeper? I want to see your perfect heart I went to the lung site next Oh my god

A human lung dude Gross The lung site Technically also You could eat that Candles I think look good Bars of soap

Remember that orange Neutrogena Yes Bar of soap remember that orange neutrogena soap always looks like a delicious candy the one that was like amber almost yeah yeah molten glass when they're blowing glass i have that on my list too hell yeah high five so fucking good yeah i'm only i'm only gonna say one that was on my list because i don't want you guys to judge me okay question lows what the the shoe yeah i'll buy that yeah yeah yeah also playstation controllers i think those look kind of good but i get it a little the pot the pot of uh uh air force or not if air maxes look good if we're getting the sneakers there's a lot of delicious looking sneakers yeah totally i totally. I was thinking about that.

I was trying to think of like the gel on an insole. Yeah. It looks kind of good. Oh, anything Dr. Scholl's makes. Did you say potpourri? Yeah, potpourri. It looks like a bag of like nuts on the- Yes!

Yeah. I was going to take that, and then AJ, my girlfriend, was fucking like, potpourri? That doesn't sound good. It looks like chips, like a bag of chips. I think so, too. It looks like a little chip situation. It depends what potpourri you've been around. Sometimes people have like pine cone potpourri.

Maybe that's not for you. But the potpourri we had were like these little curled up scented things. And they looked like Fritos. I wanted to eat them. A Pier 1 import ass potpourri. Same here. But it is a regional. It could be a regional thing.

Yeah. Numbered birthday candles. Oh, yes. That's a really good one. Damn, that's a good one. And they look like candles, really. Yeah, but the numbered ones look like these fucking delicious candies. Yeah.

Fondant. Fondant. Fondant. Wet soil. What about wet soil? Anybody else? That was brought up in the room over here, and I was like, I don't know. Looks like crushed Oreos.

Smells good, too. Oh, okay. Crushed Oreos. I get it. Do you ever have Those Christmas ornaments That look like cookies They look like They were baked almost

Like we had a lot of those They were like glazed And baked Absolutely Oh yeah A lot of tasty Christmas ornaments Hanukkah ornaments

In my house But yeah Apricot Oh sorry That's right Are you Jewish 100% Bar Mitzvah and everything

Damn Damn Down 70s Apricot facial scrub I know we got it in the last second. Packing peanuts.

Packing peanuts. Oh, shit. Oh, I had silica gel. You know. Ooh, that's, just because it says don't eat it, I'm like, I'm doing it.

I'm gonna do it. Definitely eating this. I just wanna get it, man. All that stuff, this is more of a texture thing than a look thing, but you know, like going back to like

what you would stick flowers into when it was like a green brick. Yes, yes. They still have that at a florist and I wrote florist foam and it was like a green brick yes yes they still have that end of florist and i wrote florist foam and i was like don't say that your friends will laugh you out of the room no florist foam and it like breaks off and yeah that was so satisfying incredible so satisfying bouncy balls did i say that those frosty bouncy balls oh no you did i was gonna pick like uh bouncy balls out of a quarter machine or like the super pinky balls

those look yeah those look great oh Oh, and then Barbie shoes. Shout out to any girl that ever tried to eat the shoes of their Barbie. Cause I did. Also those jelly sandals girls used to have. Oh shit. Those looked good. Those looked good as hell. Melt those down.

Remember those, remember those, um, those, uh, toys that were like a sticky hand that you would throw and it would stick on stuff. I'd eat one of those.

I'd eat one of those for sure. I might just have one of those. Or a motorcycle. I ate Lip Smackers before. Lipstick looks delicious. Yeah. Lipstick does look delicious. Damn, a lot of stuff we're not supposed to eat.

I'm starving now. I am too. We want to hear yours as well, so make sure you send them in. All Fantasy Pod on Twitter. All Fantasy Podcast at gmail.com. We want to hear your selections. Please hit us up. Special shout out to everyone on the AFE subreddit.

Another special shout out to everyone, the all fantasy, everything Patreon. Thank you for holding us down where we have watch alongs, mailbags, the shaslackity. If you want to get together with the rest of the all fantasy, everything community and so much more.

And by that, we mean a playlist that Sean, did you put it out yet? Yeah. Beautiful. There's a playlist out. Yeah, that, we mean a playlist. Sean, did you put it out yet? Yeah. Beautiful. There's a playlist out. That's good. That's dope.

Where Sean, David, and I pick songs every month. Marissa, did you pick any this month, too? She did. I did. I picked two songs, I think. Probably the only two good ones. Nobody got the order right yet. The first person that does,

they're going to get a flask in the mail from me. Wow. There you go. A flask and a human lung. Uh-huh. Someone did message me saying they really liked my pick, so I wonder if someone figured it out. I don't think, not that I saw.

I'm going to check again today, but everyone, I don't want to give it away, but everyone keeps guessing you and Ian transposed one pick. Really? I picked O Canada and a bunch of Brian Adams songs. Shout out to St. Sue Carmel. Shout out to St. Kelly Jordan chilling out there in Sioux Falls,

South Dakota. Stay in the fucking side because the governor's a moron. I'm hot now. Now I'm hot. Now this matches the garage vibes. Yeah. Fuck her. Now it feels right.

Fuck. My mom feels like what that garage is like that's how they get you shout out to everyone still working an essential job out there you're no matter what you're doing if you're working at a grocery store if you're a fucking brain surgeon you're a hero you're a hero thank you so much for holding us down and and like i mean making the world a safe place so we can sit in our respective houses and do a podcast that hopefully keeps you entertained for a couple hours. Make sure you listen to sports and make sure you watch

Always Late with Katie Nolan. Make sure you check out the pictures of Myrtle on Instagram. Such a cute little dog. She's the best. Such a cute little doggie. Such a cute little puppy. Shout out to Frankie Ocean. Shout out to Sid the Dude. Shout out to Haji Beats. Shout out to fucking

Ashley Braband. Shout out to Ashley Brabandats. Shout out to fucking Ashley Braband. Shout out to Ashley Braband. Hell yeah. Mega shout out to Ashley. I mean, who else? Shout out to David. Shout out to David. Shout out that iMac back there. Shout out all the shoes. Shout out Kickflips and Nollie Heelflips and Cakey Thickflips. I've been out there working

in the streets. Neff, you. More important than all of that, tune in again next week to another brand new episode of All Fantasy Everything. Shaklakity! that was a hate gum podcast