All Fantasy Everything - Irish People (Real or Fictional) (w/ Mike Mulloy, David Gborie, Sean Jordan)

Episode Date: March 17, 2022

Top O the Thursday mornin to ya! The GVG is coming correct on St. Patrick's Day with ENEMY of the podcast Mike Mulloy as we draft "Irish People!" Now pour some whiskey in that coffee and get ready to kiss the Blarney Stone with your ears! It's a fuuuuun one.  Guest:    Mike Mulloy @handsomeadult IG: @fakemikemulloy   Support the show! Join the All Fantasy Everything Patreon for ad-free episodes, mailbags, and video pre-rolls. Check it all out at www.patreon.com/AllFantasy.   Follow the Good Vibes Gang on social media: Ian Karmel @IanKarmel IG: @IanKarmel Sean Jordan @SeanSJordan IG: @SeancougarmelonJordan David Gborie IG: @Coolguyjokes87 Mars Mel @marsmel IG: @mars.melSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

This is a HeadGum Podcast. This is all Fantasy Everything, the podcast where we fantasy draft anything and everything from the world of pop culture. On today's episode, we're drafting Irish people, real or fictional. On this episode, we decide. Irish people, are they real or fictional?

Returning with us today is comedian and enemy of the podcast, Mike Malloy. Mike hosts Faded Comedy, a weekly stand-up show in Los Angeles. And he also hosts the Faded Happy Hour, which streams every Wednesday at fadedcomedy.com. I'm your host, Ian Carmel, and I'm joined, as always, by my friends and comedians, Sean Jordan and, back from Bolivia, David Borey. Let's get into it. Welcome to another brand new episode of All Fantasy Everything. The only podcast coming to you from County Kilkerran.

That was pretty good. I struggle when I try to do an Irish accent. Am I doing it? Am I doing it as Irish? I think for a second. It was for a second i have to start by saying irish like when i when i try to do australian it's always i have to start by being like fosters and then i whatever my version is but yeah yeah irish i'm doing an irish accent we have a art wool uh top of the morning to everyone and happy saint patrick's day this is coming out on saint patrick's day big day big day the day that i said i was gonna go have a couple drinks in the morning like a

like an adult that's your plan we'll see i told you last week we'll see how it goes do you think you're gonna no i it's a i don't think i probably won't do shit i i haven't for years have we done anything on saint patrick's day in before covid we never did really right i don't think trying to think of the last time we did yeah i don't think we were big like st pat i think we were if it was on a friday or something i'm sure we just did friday stuff right los angeles doesn't really do anything for it i feel like yeah we may have been out on a saint patrick's day but i don't think we went out for saint patrick's day yeah i don't i i definitely am like of the age where obviously i'm not trying to go out to a bar with all the people who go out once a year and try to get it handled right

that's the thing it's like that's the worst dude's barfing everywhere yeah it's like it's like green santa con fights it is like green santa con we barf we'll barf on a wednesday you know what i mean we don't go out on a fucking it's been a while i it's been a while since i since i barf probably austin was the last time like from that that from the creature i've become a quicker barf yeah well you're a fast barf in your old age barf yeah barf quick barf mcgraw dude i barf a lot easier now not quite a fart knuckle yet though never always a barf or never a fart knuckle i am barf and these are the fart knuckles we'd all like to play your wedding we'd all like to put a finger in your butt

um gross john yeah Yeah, it was. I was hoping we'd go right past it. No way, dude. I woke up to a bunch of parrots in my backyard. Oh, yeah. I mean, there's wild parrots here in California, in LA, and there were probably 15, 16 parrots. What were they doing? Loquats coming in, and they're into it.

Really? Yeah, if you ever came to la i'd point them out to you i that hurt yeah it cut me i was meant to it was meant to go right in between the ribs dude it did supposed to good good now an extended period of silence now i'll come down and we're back yeah i could probably swing it like I don't know sometime soon We'll see you got a baby daughter at home Yeah but I need a reason Let's do a live AFE in LA

Let's do a live AFE and AFE Yeah I'm in We throw one together and then Leave it on a jet plane dude Cool Great leaving on a jet plane dude cool cool great jeez jeez sean jordan wearing a baggy wedding ring dude they're gonna have to cut a piece out of that yeah sagging it yeah where'd you go with gold it's or um white gold white gold dude yeah

look at this i look like an asshole i've never had a ring on before is this is this your first ring have you did you ever like i feel like as a kid i could imagine you had a ring phase no my dad tried to have like a five finger ring that said unity oh yeah war and peace dude love and pain what do you mean queen latif is not the best rap raptress alive come on she is the best raptress alive her mc light i think um what if there was what if there was a rapper named war and peace yo war and peace that'd be dope i feel like the moment has passed but it's surprising that it didn't happen it should have that could have happened in the 80s that could have happened like to a backpacker in

the like late 90s few eras there's a few eras that could have had a war and peace asap rock featuring this is speech and war and peace dude they both want to have brunch have you heard sage francis and war and peace's new album i bet you sage floated that around before he landed on sage francis honestly you might have how did he land on sage francis even i don't really know i don't know what it means but well sage i don't know it landed on him yeah i'm sad the way he tells it i want it to be his name i want his name to be sage francis yeah his name's probably jeremy it probably is it's probably not sage francis i'm looking it up there's a rapper named larry june i'm sure everyone's aware

but it's funny that there's a rapper named larry to me doesn't seem like a rapper his name is paul william francis is it really and his nickname is sage okay well there we go who gave him that nickname he probably did how do you earn the nickname sage maybe you make like a beautiful focaccia bread just like a delit just like a like a crispy on the outside tender on the inside a depth of flavor soaked in olive oil i'd like to think it was because he was always burning stuff. Yeah, he might have been. We had Lakeith Stanfield on the show and the whole green room smelled like sage

because that dude stayed burning it the whole time. He's rad. He seems so dope. He's on his own wavelength in what I think is a very real way. Seems like it. It could seem contrived if somebody else was doing it but i kind of think he's just really like that he's just kind of like

a weirdo yeah i think he's just kind of a weirdo he was out there with i respect it the lead singer of uh one republic who really who had a very like good morning america energy and the two of them together was like real weird i like that i like it i like it when there's weird guests on late night like they don't quite like each other you could tell they're not into each other's energy yeah that's a fun watch what made it better like like it's not that like keith stanfield wasn't it like it's not like he was just on such a different wavelength like he was nice to ryan tedder is the guy's name like he was just on such a different wavelength. Like, he was nice to Ryan Tedder is the guy's name. Like, he was nice to him, but he was just coming at him. Like, Ryan Tedder was talking about, I don't know, something.

Like, getting, like, I don't know, some fucking, like, Good Morning America-esque thing. And Lakeith Stanfield was just like, oh, man, that's really cool. But, like, you could tell it was like he'd never seen or heard of it before. That's dope. Yeah, it was like he'd never seen or heard of it before that's dope yeah it was cool i mean to be fair that's what happens when i talk to ted or two it's like god shut the fuck up ted are on different wavelengths yeah oh yeah we're just like oil and vinegar oh sean jordan is here seanis jordan on twitter sean cougararmelonjordan on instagram shawn drank the flaming hot cheeto mountain dew yet not yet i'm gonna shotgun and put it on youtube for the patrons that's what i'm gonna do i'm gonna shotgun it oh my god oh that seems like a

yeah man i tried those sour patch kid ones those suck someone told me that one of them was good i believed him like a fool i was led down the primrose path. They suck. Shut that fucking dog up. Get him. Shut up, Sean. Don't tell me what to do. Shut your fucking dog up.

I'm trying to talk about important stuff like sour. It says so surprised nobody. It tastes like a giant liquid sour patch kit. Yeah. I took a drink and I dumped it out. It feels like you're drinking a sore throat when you drink so like yes that flavor yeah it scratches like it's cutting holes in your throat all the way down or something yeah um not not amazing but i am

i'm in a great mood my mom's leg is doing better she can walk better i had a rough couple weeks when i was back home i didn't really tell obviously but like She was rough And it was tough for me And she's healing up she can walk I'm stoked because I'm just worried about this wedding So I think she's going to be here Here I am almost crying but I'm very excited I'm in a very good mood and I love all of you

And I love that we get to do this I haven't done this in a while this is sick I love it I'm happy You guys are dank marissa you rule thanks man glad you shut that dog up thanks buddy fuck you sean i hope he barks again i hope he fucking knows you're talking and he interrupts i'll be in salem on march 19th at the infinity room salem oregon wow taking the trip down south going down south Is that an infinity showroom like at a car dealership? Or what's the infinity room?

Yeah, I'm going to drive my Tesla down there, dude. It's like the new comedy club in Salem. Nice. That's awesome. Other than that, watch the Late Late Show with James Corden. There you go. Listen to all fantasy, everything. Keep it in the family. David Borey is here. Who got Joke 77 on Instagram?

Fresh from a trip to Las Vegas? I like to call it lost wages. I like that. I like that. I like it a lot. Anyone out there can use that. That's pretty funny. Pretty funny.

It's a fun thing to call it. Yeah. Dude, how was the bachelor party? How were the goings on? It was good. It was real reasonable. Yeah. I'm up 400 bucks, so I feel like I can't be stopped.

Did you wear that new green Rolex? I did wear the new green Rolex. It brought me luck did you get a rolex i got it's fake but yeah i have two fake rolexes now it's the collection's growing that equals a rolex i yeah yeah you can get into collecting fake ro Rolexes. I'm already in. I'm already in. I got two down. Have like six on your arm and just have them set to like Tokyo, New York, Paris. Yeah.

I do all my business. Cleveland. Dakar. Two to Bolivia. It should just be places where like weird races happen. Like the Dakar, like the desert race, Monaco. The Baja thing or whatever. Dude, I got all my watches set to different times it might be in monaco right now yeah where is monaco it is i'll tell you because i've been planning a trip to the south of france it is the south of france okay

i thought it was by africa no well i mean you mean, it's close. You're thinking of Morocco, I think. Or Martinique. Oh, I might be thinking of Morocco. Is that in Africa? I think you're thinking of Martin Lawrence. I think you're thinking of Martin Lawrence. You're either thinking of Mozambique or Martin Lawrence. Mr. Baggy Leather himself, Martin Lawrence.

I mean, there's a few guys who could get that title. There's a lot of Mr. Baggy Leather. Lord Tariq, Peter Guns, Martin Lawrence, Nelly for a time. Who among us hasn't been a fucking Mr. Baggy? Martinique nowhere near Africa, by the way. It's in the Caribbean. How many leather things have you owned? I've had one leather jacket.

I have a suede jacket. I have a leather jacket. I think it's only been wallets for me. Gloves, wallets. I forgot about wallets and belts. I have a pouch. I should get a leather jacket. I think it's only been wallets for me. Gloves, wallets. I forgot about wallets and belts. Sure. I have a pouch. I should get a leather sweatsuit.

You, I mean, you're going to put the sweat in it. You're going to turn it to suede? That's going to be hot on your weasel. I got a leather condom. Hot on your weasel. Never heard anyone call the bad dude a weasel before. Oh, you can call it whatever you want, man. Where do you wear a leather sweatsuit?

Other than anywhere you want. You can't wear a shirt underneath, right? No. No, absolutely not. Not if you want your nipples to have a good time. You should get that artist who makes the NBA 50th and 75th anniversary team jackets to make you a faded leather sweats uh sweatsuit mikey there's been there's been a lot of uh you know clothing ideas that we've had

the uh the the baseball jersey the uh the letterman jacket we'll get there okay good man those are moves i'd like to make but i wouldn't you wouldn't wear a letterman jack i couldn't either right now i i like to make, but I wouldn't. You wouldn't wear a Letterman jacket? I couldn't either right now. I like to think I would, but what would happen? The closest thing I have to a Letterman jacket, I bought it at Nike eight years ago. I've never once worn it.

Not one time have I worn it. Actually, no, it wasn't a Letterman jacket. We were going to do the satin jacket. The coach's jacket. That's what it was. Did you have one that said Mr. Sean sean i did it sioux falls black belts it had a giant giant tiger with an open mouth on the back it said sioux falls black belt school and on the front it had mr sean stitched in cursive god and i got years ago i dude i bet

it's in the catacombs of of the mom's. I bet it's somewhere. Cause she still has like all my belts, my uniforms, my black belt certificate, all that stuff. So what did it say on the back? Sioux Falls, black belt, Sioux Falls,

black belt school. And it sounds like the most made up karate school. Of course I got picked on. I mean, Larry, Larry Hoover, super karate sounds pretty made up. So you go to the Western mall,

go to the Western mall in sioux falls it's still there he's been no i believe you i've seen i've 36 years up his website 36 years that man has been teaching super karate that's crazy he's like doing well the first the first two the first two he was only teaching regular karate and then and then he he got hip to the super karate well when you invent super karate you're not gonna stop teaching exactly exactly it's it's basically like brazilian jiu-jitsu yeah he's the great he's the great super karate what kind of soup can is like well i want to learn soup obviously i want to learn super karate that's if you gotta learn one eight

if you'd have given me the option as a boy like do you want to learn karate or do you got to learn one. I mean, me at eight, if you'd have given me the option as a boy, like, do you want to learn karate or do you want to learn super karate? Yeah. Feels like every time. It's a no brainer. Only a fool would pick regular karate. What are you doing? Yeah, I could.

Would you be so bummed at your kid? You'd be like, what? What if the studios were across from each other? You're taking like karate lessons in the karate place. You're just doing... It's all dark. They just give you a gun. Here's karate.

They're on just the same corridor of the mall. It's just right across the street. Across the way, you can see the super karate place, and they're practicing doing slides across a Ferrari, dude. Come on. There's a Capri Sun after practice. They're just like Luke Duke right across the hood. They're practicing how to kneel on the ground holding two flares like you're in uh the rock come on kick a cigarette out of someone's mouth when a bully steps to you kick the cigarette

out of their mouth how to kill somebody with a switchblade comb meanwhile you're in there like practicing how to do like fucking kicks and shit. Come on. Yeah. Proper form on punches. Yeah. All your belts are no matter what color they're braided leather. Like you're. Come on. Yeah. That's that's the best idea you've ever had.

Yeah. Braided leather super karate belts. A purple braided leather super karate belt. You should wear a braided. You should wear a aged braided leather belt at your wedding dude everything else would be shining except you should have an old ass braided leather belt dude i'm gonna ask if i can get one of those suits that changes colors somehow like the like those assholes get on their cars like that chameleon paint let me get a suit like that what was that that what's that what's it called when it's like a reacts to body heat oh hypercolor hypercolor dude yeah you know laura doesn't know what that is it's funny it came

up like a week ago she doesn't know what hypercolor was i don't know what that is see this really hypercolor you know you put like your hand on it then you take it off and it's like a different color because it reacts to heat oh yeah okay body heat or pour water on it or something it was what happened to that technology that was dope the kids are doing everything why don't they bring hyper color back used to make weapons gap is popular again you know it was raytheon who made those yeah now that's drones dude went straight to drone technology i just bought some slacks from the gap dude the gap never went out as far as i'm concerned no me, me neither. You know what?

It was weird. I was walking. I was in the mall when I was in St. Louis, and I was walking by the gap, and I was just like, I forgot that the gap is a place. Yeah, I did too. Because I just haven't been in the mall in forever, and I forgot that that's how people buy clothes a lot of the time. Where's Strikes 1 and 2? You got to go to the mall, man.

Well, I mean, that whole not being around people the last two years thing kind of took the wind out of its sails. Are you referring to the ongoing COVID-19 epidemic? The street virus known as COVID-19. Which Sean still denies exists. He denies it.

He's a big denier. I mean, I try to give David masks. I left a few masks at his place in Denver when I was just there and he... I'm Tri-Vax, bro. I'm Tri-Vax. There's no mandate. He just... He pissed all over him.

I got six of them, dude. I got like nine shots of AstraZeneca. I'm out here. I'm doing crazy stuff vaccine-wise. I re-upped my MMR just in case. I got the North Korean vaccine, which is just a syringe full of Dijon mustard, but it works.

I've just been robo-tripping. Every day I wake up and drink a bottle of Tussin, and that gets me through the day, and that's really all I care about is me. Yeah. Well, who cares if you got COVID when you're on a cloud like that? Yeah. I don't think COVID can get up there under your Tussin cloud.

You can't get COVID if you're crushing Tussin. Uh-uh, dude. It doesn't happen. Impossible. Me and Warren Peace. Warren Peace. Warren Peace. Me and Warren crushing Tussin under the bridge. Yeah, dude.

Any dates coming up? Yeah, go see me in Calgary tomorrow. Oh, hell yeah. This comes out. Oh, yeah, okay. The 17th, right? Oh, next week. Yeah, I got you.

Yeah, also go to Faded Denver on the 18th. And, you know, there's other stuff. It's on my Instagram. Don't worry about it. David Borey, the Calgary Flame himself. Mike Malloy is here. At Mike Malloy Esquire on Twitter now. At Handsome Adult now.

Oh, I got the OG one back. That's right. At Handsome Adult on Twitter. At Fake Mike Malloy on Instagram. Never taken away from that. This is your 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11. This is your 12th AFE, dude. How do you know that?

What are you looking at right now? Because our super producer, Marissa, puts all the past drafts in this little doc she sends me. Dude, Marissa, you are so goddamn dope. Couldn't be more on top of it. Crazy. Well, it could have been better if I updated his Twitter, but... That doesn't matter. That was my fault. I misread it. He's in the middle like Calgary, dude. This doesn't happen without her.

What the fuck's your problem, Micah? What the fuck's your beef, dude? Well, it's funny. I asked you to come on so i could promote my album recording and then they didn't finish building the venue so oh no so it's being rescheduled to july well just a more occasion for us to have you back on exactly yeah so uh i'll be at cap city when they're done building it i guess that's hilarious i was just like because it's two weeks it was two weeks from now that they i like was just about to buy my flight and they were like oh hey we're gonna move that and i was like oh perfect because

it is pricey right now yeah oh yeah it sucks right now oh really every why oh because is it because of gas do i sound like a moron they put gas on a plane yeah and because they can't i didn't sound like a moron until i started talking and then then i sounded like a moron yeah um does that have a i'm gonna sound stupid again that has a direct effect on how much a plane ticket cost obviously it's gas yeah it's a direct on everything everything it has a direction effect yeah it's the highest it's ever been in our lifetime is that right gas right now it's the highest it's ever been it's correct nationally crazy yeah crazy california has the highest gas

prices ever recorded in america right now really oh yeah are you still are you siphoning gas thank god for that certain gas stations here you see a seven up there yeah it was it's five it's five five 75 is pretty much what i've been seeing is gas more does gas cost more in different neighborhoods an example i was in beverly hills one time and i got gas and it was way more than it was on like verdugo yeah is that true there's there's a mobile in la that'll just charge seven dollars a gallon for any time they're just like they're always like two dollars higher than every but like even across the street it'll be two dollars cheaper you're just like you really think you can do this yeah how does that work it's yeah how do they do that

they're paying like a twenty dollar i don't want to cross the street fee i don't yeah i don't know i don't know how they do it but they do it does it only happen in LA? It doesn't happen in Portland, right? There's not neighborhoods where gas is going to be. Yeah, of course. Everywhere. If it's closer to a freeway, it's going to cost more money. It depends on how much money they need to make to stay open. So if the real estate is more expensive, you know.

It's going to sound stupid as well, but here we go. Can you choose how much you want your gas to be? Like you can, right? If I open a gas station, I want my gas to be 20 bucks a gallon. I can do that, right? Yeah. Obviously, I'm not going to sell your gas to be. Like, you can, right? If I open a gas station, I want my gas to be 20 bucks a gallon. I can do that, right? Yeah. Obviously, I'm not going to sell any gas, but like if you're in the middle of Montana,

you have the only gas station, you can charge whatever you want. There's not like a... You could. People often do. People who drive by it. Yeah. Crazy.

Like the most expensive gas in the country is on Highway 1, you know, which drives up the coast because there's just no other gas stations there. Where are you going to go? Are you going to get off the highway? Also, it's more expensive to buy the gas because you've got to get the tanker to your gas station. The tanker burns gas. It's got to use more gas to

get there. Brother, everything's more expensive right now. Good use of brother. Adam does that all the time. Boy, brother, I wish I could help you. I tell you what, we could use that train system that they're proposing that still won't touch South Dakota. Yeah, it won't go anywhere near it.

Man, it is. They're not trained. It is frustrating because it's like, why not? Why not? There's like four stops in North Dakota, right? There was one in Cheyenne, I think. Or wait, no, that's Wyoming, isn't it? There was one. There were like a couple in North Dakota. Is think uh or wait no that's wyoming isn't it yeah there was

one there were like a couple in north dakota biz bismarck is that north dakota you're playing yourself here yes it is north dakota yeah i think that's where it was and pure is south dakota only state capital that does not share any letters of the name of the state a little fun fact for everybody out there listening that's the that's the kind of talk that gets you no train stops dude what do you mean you don't want to kill 20 hours on an amtrak with that next to you you know the average person farts like 13 times a day no big deal is that true is that the number i think so that was something from like high school that we used to say who knows if we even looked at seems high feels low does it though yeah i was gonna say really dive in think about what you're doing i mean if eight spiders crawl into your

mouth a year that seems like a the right number 13 farts a day you think you're cranking 13 i might fart 13 times probably i just just farted like 30 seconds ago. Because it probably happened in your sleep. Yeah. And like if you fart like four times in a row, there's four farts. Yeah. But didn't you do that when you were on the road with Kinane and Cook back in the day in the hotel room? Didn't they say that you were sleeping and you went like, right?

It sounded. They told me. I mean, I was asleep, but they said it sounded they told me i mean i was asleep but they said it sounded it sounded cord it sounded like there was an artist's hand involved you know what i mean like there was a there was an intent there was a like a vibrato like they were cupping it like a trombone i think it went like he was like an ascending tone kind of thing like an acapella like it was like the whiff and poofs you know there's people out there that do in the bugle i get people that don't think farts are funny or you know boners or whatever and they're all funny all of it's so funny let it be funny let yourself live

farts are funnier than boners if we want to if we want to create a taxonomy yeah yeah historically yeah yeah farts are funny, though, man. Boners are also funny. Don't get me wrong. Yeah, they're funny. Yeah, it's just not fart funny. Farts are... That's like the funniest thing.

That's a league of its own. It's not fair to boners. It's not fair to boners. I mean, I know it's like the hackiest, but I just can't believe there was a character on television named Boner. Yeah.

That was crazy. Boner. It involves shows. I didn't even know what Boner was. Honestly, I didn't know there was a character on television named Boner. That was great. Boner. In all shows. I didn't even know what Boner was. Honestly, I didn't know it was a hard penis back then. I just thought he was my introduction to what Boner was. I thought it was a soft one. It also used to mean just like a mistake. Oh, did it really?

Yeah, you would make a boner. Really? I think it was more commonly a boner was more commonly like a mistake than a they probably had like so many nicknames for erections back in the you know before like the internet and cable tv diluted all of our imaginations people were coming up with crazy like i bet names for for for hard-ons the The stock exchange? The stock exchange, yeah. Chattanooga choo-choo. Jack Dempsey's rigid right arm. Speaking of

growing pains, did you guys ever see that Kirk Cameron movie about the firefighter who can't stop jacking off? What? He's, like, Kirk Cameron made that movie about that firefighter that couldn't stop jacking off, and, like, his wife was gonna leave him, so he, like, said his he was, like about that firefighter that couldn't stop jacking off and like his wife was going to leave him. So he like said he was like a firefighter and God saved him from jacking off.

I did not know that. I have not seen that movie. Kirk Cameron's like a crazy religious nut now and like makes like Christian movies. And one of them was about a firefighter who was like his wife was going to leave him if he didn't stop jacking off on the computer. Wow. And he sets the computer on fire as a promise to God to be better. It's the worst movie I've ever seen. Well, I'll tell you this.

You can go ahead and jack off without a computer. Yeah. It happens. Lord, I've been focused on the wrong hose. it happens lord i've been focused on the wrong hose that is what you're doing here that's why you're listening oh for gosh's sake so that's what mike's up to any other day is come see faded watch yeah every friday uh faded happy hour every wednesday we got uh actually it'll be after this week so never mind or it'll be thursday that this air see the guest this wed Wednesday doesn't matter.

I think I'm doing faded. Oh, yeah. You're doing the 25th, right? Yeah. Yeah. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

The week after this comes out. Yeah. Yeah. So, yeah, that'll be a good one. I'll be there. I'm very excited. I'll actually be there because I was supposed to be recording my album this weekend. And now I will be present.

That's why I canceled it. I fucking I blew up a truck that was bringing supplies to the Cap City Comedy Club. Look at that thing I just put in the chat. It's called Fireproof is the name of the movie. And there's like two Jesus rings in for the O's and proof. This is a very misleading cover. Jesus rings. Those are just wedding rings, brother.

Yeah, those are just wedding rings. We call them Jesus rings around here. I know. What the fuck is a Jesus rings? Those are just wedding rings, brother. Yeah, those are just wedding rings. We call them Jesus rings around here. I know, what the fuck is a Jesus ring? As I'm saying it, I'm like, what are you talking about? My name's Ian Carmel, at Ian Carmel on Twitter, at Ian Carmel on Instagram, at Ian Carmel on Jewish Jesus ring app. Look me up on that.

You can look it up on G, Jesus ring, Jesus ring, G-L-E.com uh i got nothing coming up other than i'll be at faded i haven't done stand-up in forever so i'm gonna be at faded on the 25th i'm gonna be on the late late show every night and that'll do it that'll be your carmel fix um gosh what else gosh gosh gosh that's about it y'all we are gathered here today not only to talk about uh jesus rings but also to do something that has seldom happened in the professional sports league of america draft irish that's actually not true as we as we may see uh as the draft unfolds we are drafting irish people

today's st patrick's day if you're listening to this on the day it comes out if not it's near st patrick's day and mike malloy an irishman himself wanted to draft both fictional or real irish people there it is any any impetus behind that other than what i just uh described i just figured it was dropping on St. Patrick's Day, and you guys haven't done it yet, so it seemed like a fun time. It's perfect. You're Irish.

Sean's Irish. David, any Irish in the history? Not that I've seen. Yeah, not a drop over here either. I've seen both of you be a little Irish. That's not. You guys don't have the monopoly on getting drunk. Well, we might

not have innovated but we perfected i don't think that's even true uh you ever seen a drunk frenchman hilarious yeah all right see yeah yeah okay i was entertaining the idea of making a joke about my dad and i chose not to okay you should have gone for it i'm sure it'll happen at some point it's not gonna get back to him what's it what's he gonna do show up well david left to go cry i it's true david just got up to do something David quit, David quit the show He quit the podcast, just gonna be the three of us Maybe, you know what, actually

since David's gone, and it is the Irish draft on St. Patrick's Day I'm letting the two of you play rock, paper, scissors David and I are both sitting out Alright, I'm shooting up Here we go Rock, paper, scissors, shoot Wow, go. Rock, paper, scissors, shoot! Wow, two scissors.

Rock, paper, scissors, shoot! Two papers. Rock, paper, scissors, shoot! Oh, Mikey wins! Damn it. David, since neither of us are Irish, I let Mike and Sean hash it out like the Catholics and the Protestants.

Corned beef and hash it out. I like you. Corned beef and hash it out. Mike won Rock, Paper, Scissors as the winner of Rock, Paper, Scissors. It is incumbent upon you to determine the order of today's draft, but before you do that,

I will remind you it is a serpentine draft. And what is that? What does that mean? It's like cleaning off a dry erase board. You know? You just kind of go from the top right to the left go down a little bit back to the right down a little bit back to the left down a little bit back to the right just wipe it off clean it up basically what it means is you pick fourth on the first round you pick first on the second round mike with that in mind what will the order of today's draft be i'm just going to go in the

order of the zoom do david first me me second, Sean third, Ian fourth. David, Mike, Sean, Sean, Patrick. David, Mike, Sean, David, Michael, Sean, and Ian. Hot corner. Michael. That's a good one to get your Irish going. Michael. Is it?

Irish Michael. Michael. I don't know if it is. Moiko. Moiko. I feel like you might be getting further away. I don't have an Irish. Moiko. Miguel.

Miguel. Miguelito. David, you have the first pick in the Irish fictional and real All Fair and See Everything draft, and we're going to get to that first pick right after this short break. This episode of All Fantasy Everything is brought to you by Policy Genius. Policy Genius, I'm going to hit you. We're going to talk about some life insurance stuff real quick.

Now, 40% of people with life insurance wish they'd gotten their policy at a younger age. Of course you do. I wish I'd done everything at a younger age. That's neither here nor there. Policy Genius, essentially, it just helps you get the life insurance you need fast so you can get on with your life. With Policy Genius, you can find life insurance policies that start at just $292 per year for $1 million of coverage. Some options offer same-day approval and avoid unnecessary medical exams. So I have life insurance. It had nothing to do with me. It's my wife did everything, but it's tough.

It's a hassle to go through and get. You have to research it, which I don't like researching anything. If I buy something, I just go into the person that works at the store and say, what is right in the middle? What's not the best? What's not the worst? And that is how I do it. With life insurance, obviously, you want to be a little bit more careful about that. But how do I know where to start? You know what I mean? I have no idea what to do, where to look. Nobody does. And that's what Policy Genius does. They just go in, they find and compare all the best quotes for you. They just go to all the nation's top insurers, and then they give you your best options. They're just a few clicks, and then you're going to find your lowest price. And their expert license support team

is your advocate. They work for you. They're not getting bonuses. They're not getting anything like that from certain insurance companies. They're not out there being smarmy. They just want to help you out. They're answering the questions, handling the paperwork, shaking the hands, kissing the babies. They're doing it all for you. And if you don't have life insurance, I know it sucks to talk about or to think about, but you're just going to stick people with the bill. You're going to stick your loved ones with the bill. Don't nobody want to do that. You know what I mean? Get covered. I don't want anyone inheriting my debt. And then they see what I spent money on probably. I don't need all that nonsense in my life.

Get it covered. Get an insurance policy. Get it handled. And like I said, Policy Genius gives you unbiased advice from a licensed expert support team. They have thousands of five-star reviews on Google, Trustpilot, from customers who've felt the benefits of their service. So get on it. Don't wait.

Don't hesitate. Don't procrastinate. Oh, yeah. I got a song on Spotify as a rapper. That's neither here nor there. Don't put off life insurance. Make it easy with Policy Genius. Head to policygenius.com or click the link in the description to get your free life insurance quotes and see how much you could save. That's policygenius.com. Yeah, we're back. Welcome back to All Fantasy Everything, the only podcast that has ever existed. This is it.

This is the podcast. It gets me every time. I really like it. You have the first pick. What will your first pick be? I mean, I feel like I got to go JFK. There it is. Right?

Jonathan Fitzgerald Kennedy. Yeah. Yeah. You guys have heard of him. Yeah. I'm rewatching Mad Men. I to the to that part in madman the first irish catholic president son of a bootlegger you can call him irish a what a great a great american president in many ways horny horny horny guy extremely liberal

yeah with that disnick yeah liberal with the dills nick you got it healthy dose he was the young was he the youngest yeah he was the youngest president right up and or clinton might have been younger now also liberal with the dilsnick yeah also liberal with the deals they were close if they were if if he wasn't the youngest president yeah you know he jfk he got assassinated did you know that what what yeah no he didn't no theodore roosevelt was the youngest he was 42 what wow 42 yeah 42 sean he was two years older than you can you imagine the president being too old you in two years being the president those are different things i can imagine the president being two years older than me kind of but in two years i can't imagine being the

boy that gave me i'd almost gave me the poops just thinking about it. Like, when you really... When you really... I think that might have been the... Or last night. Sour Patch Kids energy drink. Hey, I can't go to church. I got the poops.

Poop? No, man, I can't. I wonder what if... It's crazy, because they're just people you know and it's at some point yeah lizard people yeah they were all just kids in school at one point at one point they weren't special and then something happened i don't think i could handle it if like some guy went to school with was president no no i would hate it. Like, it would just be, Jake? Fucking Jake? Yeah, dude. Yeah.

Steven? Yeah. I turn 60, all of a sudden, Ryan Wilch is president. Like, what? Oof. It'd be wild. There will never be a Wilch in the White House. That's, you got that.

Not as long as I'm here. No, man. They can't marry my daughter either. Yeah, JK, he was the first one on my list i you know you guys get it right yeah he didn't absolutely i didn't even have him on the list i didn't either war he was you didn't have him on the list i was i'm going all not irish americans i'm going straight up irish oh yeah me too i'm playing i'm playing the game on hard but we'll see we'll see i'm going all real too oh but you'll see not me As it unfolds. He went to, John F. Kennedy went to a school called CHOTE for a while.

Is CHOTE, is that an acronym? Or is it? No. What's CHOTE? I mean, I know it's a school. It's like a prestigious boarding school in Wallingford, Connecticut. Or is it Connecticut or New York? Connecticut, yeah.

Hilarious. I don't know the difference. CHOTE's in New York. There is one in New York. Or not a CHOTE in New York. There's a prestigious boarding school. But this one's in Connecticut. I don't know the difference. There is one in New York, or not a chote in New York. There's a prestigious boarding school, but this one's in Connecticut. He went to chote. They went to Harvard.

Classic. He was in the Navy. He was a war hero in the Navy, famously piloting PT, I believe, 109, which he wrote a book about. Yeah, PT 109. He was a pilot? No no he was a boat pilot dude yeah oh yeah okay that's what Navy means I get it yeah yeah although there are

Navy pilots like Top Gun yeah and Jag yeah you guys remember Jag yeah isn't that like Naval lawyers yeah Naval lawyers you remember Pensacola Wings of Gold? I don't.

It was a show in the early 90s. Pensacola Wings of Gold, dude. USA, man. They were going crazy. NCIS. I remember Wings. That's naval, too. Yeah. Anyway, dude.

um anyway dude john f kennedy yeah yeah john kennedy yeah what else what else is there to say john kennedy the first irish catholic president not the first president of irish heritage but the first irish catholic the first super irish president dirty little pickle on that man now we have a we currently have another irish catholic president yeah joseph biden and he's the same age that john f kennedy would be if he was still alive that man is it's he's old as fuck man why do we keep doing this why do we keep doing letting people who have so little time left on the clock be in charge he's so old i think at this point it was just whoever the other person was yeah i mean anybody who we thought could beat donnie trump but yeah i don't know who well whatever oh man

he's old he's 79 he's 80 he's he's twice as old as teddy roosevelt was when he became president he's three times older than franklin delano roosevelt i think of as an old man like i don't think i i can't imagine him being young what was teddy roosevelt is that the 40s teddy roosevelt well teddy roosevelt was born at the age of 42 and then stayed 42 the whole time that i think a teddy roosevelt is really strappy. What decade was he president? When was he president? That's none of your business, Sean. We're not telling you, Sean.

I had a wedding ring on. What do you think he was president? I love this game. It's fun. I really enjoy this game. Was he a one-term president? No, I don't think so. What does that have to do with anything? Don't flip that around on us and make us look 1938 to 1942 ted roosevelt i said what i said

are you thinking of franklin rose yeah you're thinking of franklin roosevelt bubba delano yeah i was thinking of you're right i was thinking of franklin roosevelt so teddy roosevelt i'm going to say 19 come on come on i don't know if it's earlier or later get there i'm rooting for you so hard 19 24 to 1928 shit stop pointing at your dick he created the national park system he was at all he was scrapping 1890 1902 yo okay to 1906 1901 1901 after mckinley mckinley was assassinated yes yeah to 1909 you know jfk was also assassinated that's true what and the luxor is like a pyramid did you know that shit david you were just in vegas did you see the luxor from the inside at all i was downtown baby oh you were in the weird

part we were we were in fremont we were in fremont the whole time the whole time man the whole time you really buried the lead here what what were you guys doing out there i mean we were we were getting into it fremont's fremont's game you know yeah absolutely more vague things i've only been to fremont once and it was with you drinking hennessy out of a styrofoam cup i got there and left immediately yeah i know we weren't even there yet when you left you were calling us from the uber and you're like get out of there like we're not even there yet i was pretty ham sandwiched we had had a lot a lot of salty meat and alcohol yeah we did we went to that yeah i went to that dinner it was

man that was uh las jagas right yeah sam t came out that night it was tight yeah anyway yeah jonathan kennedy uh mike mulloy time for your first pick well I'm not going to let this one linger I am taking Dolores O'Riordan of the Cranberries dog just yeah fucking rules the Cranberries rule R.I.P. she was a real one

I did not know I'm such a fool for you dog click it's such an underrated movie. And when that hits. I agree. I do agree. Dog, I remember.

Because I remember that came out when we were in college. You think it's underrated? Such an underrated movie. He said underrated. It's good. It's a good movie. It is. People love Click.

But I feel like people played it out when it first came out, and they were like, oh, whack. But then it was on, like, the movie channel at college, I remember, and, like, fucking... I don't think you went to a real college. It was on the movie channel at college. No, like, our dorm just used to, like, it would have, like, the five movies that came out on DVD that month on it,

and it was just... That was one that was always in... That was in a rotation for a month, and I remember seeing it on it on that and just being like fucking bawling my eyes out at the end i've never seen click i never will you can tell me it's really good but i'm not gonna watch it it's better than you think i believe you yeah i believe that it's good in a tearjerker i'm just christopher walken's really funny in it yeah he said he's not watching fucking click damn dude marissa tomei in that who's the wife no it's a merce back in sale kate beckinsale that's who it is yeah i don't know the difference would have been better for me one of them dated matt rafe for a while oh i i remember

that oh yeah that was kate beckinsale remember that weird move where it's like holy buckets what's going on they're just like sometimes sometimes a comedian really knocks one out of the park they're chewing on each other's tongues right outside of the improv and you're like kate beckinsale i love it yeah it's pretty bad i'm not doing it yeah it's one of those things where you're like man matt rife i don't know he's like a pretty boy uh pretty boy like comedy store comedian or something like that and uh started dating kate beckinsale yeah it was a big win it was a big win for all of us i love to see watch click man i bet you d bones down i'm not gonna we're not gonna watch click you're gonna watch he's not fucking we're not watching it i'm

gonna come rearrange those books dude yeah go come over dude i'll beat your i'll beat your ass with the book i'll beat your ass with a parrot. I'm going to come in swinging parrots. I'll take them all out of chromological order. I don't give a shit. Oh, chromological order. Look at me with my $5 words. All right, I'll watch Collectible. Telling me my college is made up. How dare you?

It was on the movie channel at college. It sounds like everybody loved you. It was on the movie channel at college. When Marsha the Penguins was on the movie channel when uh when marsha the penguins was on the movie channel at college we just all like would collectively nap whenever it came on it was just like i know you i know you didn't but it did sound like you said marsha the penguin that's what i thought too marsha the penguin yeah marsha the penguin marsha the penguin marsha the penguin dude i love you marsha the penguins is a good nap movie oh absolutely that'd be a good draft actually

that movie oh yeah uh the cranberries fucking rock dude oh yeah cranberries fucking rule i when i i remember when i was featuring for pete holmes one year up in portland we just drove around freestyle rapping i know that sounds lame and maybe it was too uh to the zombie because it's got that bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum so it's like slow enough that you can like improv group rap you know what i mean oh yeah and it was fun it was it was not for anyone we weren't trying to get anything out of it it was lame as hell but it was pure you guys were trying to get signed in the back trying to get signed it was pure unfiltered lame white guy fun like it was just wasn't hurting anybody a memory right there do you remember that day that we drove

around and we were playing the star wars theme to strangers we would pull up next to strangers and we would just with kane yeah kyle and we would just crank the star wars theme and it would be like we pulled up next to people i remember because i had to like this was like pre-music streaming so i had like i went to some like soundboard on my internet browser on my phone. Yeah. And like, that's how we did it. God damn.

That was funny. It's a really fun thing to do because it starts out with all brassy. So you just pull up to someone with the windows down, wink at them, and then drive away. And everybody smiled. Yeah. It worked every time. And then we did it. We dropped Kyle off in Northwest somewhere and did it to him.

We got him with it. Oh, yeah. You doubled back and got it. That's a good point. The snake ate its tail, man. We let it happen. I like that. Anybody can get it, dude.

Anybody. Dolores O'Riordan, great pick. Hell, yeah. Sean Jordan, time for your first pick. I want to go fictional but i feel like that's uncouth since everybody is gone no no no yeah i got some fictional ones in there all right this is probably i probably could have got this i just like it i'm doing this i'm doing bobby o'shea from wedding crashers vince vaughn

vince vaughn's alter ego Oh, okay My favorite fictional Irish person His alter ego It's fictional that he's Irish And he's fictional It's great, it's a fucking inception It is, and that was the first thing That popped into my mind on this whole thing Because that scene

I mean, we've definitely talked about Wedding Crashers Extensively On this talk show here But it is just scene that scene i mean we've definitely talked about wedding crashers extensively on this on this talk show here but it is just it is so fun that particular scene do you think vince vaughn himself might be irish he might be i didn't even look actually i honestly i didn't look because i just bobby o'shea the first thing that popped into my head and then uh owen wilson's character too but then when they he just goes i'm ready to get drunk what's owen wilson's character name shamus o'toole he's lebanese italian irish english and german i don't think i don't think he counts does that not count he does look kind of lebanese that's very interesting he's swarthy

for sure yeah in the movie made he talks shit about lebanese people a little bit and he can yeah he can do it sounds like he can talk shit about a lot of people there you go six five dude he's up there he is a big boy you remember when he was like early tmz days when he was just a man about hollywood and he but he was like all rambunctious and he would like spit on reporters and stuff. You remember that Vince Vaughn? I don't remember him spitting on anyone. He'd spit on like Seth Green or something too. Like there was TMZ footage

of him outside of the Viper Room or some shit. Just like such a famous dickhead. Like that move where he's just like and just stared at someone. I kind of get spitting on Seth Green. I don't know if it was Seth Green. It was somebody like that,

or like David Faustino or something. I get that too. Those are two people I get spitting on. Jimmy Galecki. He's 6'5", and both of those guys collectively aren't. You know what I mean? Yeah, if I'm 6'5", I'm spitting.

And I got to say, even as a short king, I get Vince Vaughn. Get him. Speak on it, short king. Even as a short king, I get... Get him. Speak on it, short king. Even as a short king, I kinda get Vince Vaughn spitting on us. You know? Rise above, short king. Let him know.

I forgot about that. Oh, I forgot about that. Short king. Remember Short Cop? Huh? Remember Short Cop? Are you Short Cop? Remember Short Cop? No, what's Short Cop? Are you talking about a little cop? I push rhymes like, wait, that guy?

That guy's name was Short Cop? Yeah. K-A-H-P, I think. No, I did not know there was another person on that song. And that's my fault. Yeah, it's Ice Cube. Am I an asshole? No, you're probably right. Well, you are an asshole.

That doesn't mean you're an asshole because we're doing a draft of Irish people and you took someone who's not even Irish. A fictional, fictional character. Every other Irish person was on the board except for JFK and the lead singer of the Cranberries. Ice Cube and Short Cop. K-H-O-P. Short Cop and Short King coming out.

Yeah, dude. Short King. Time for my first pick. Boy, there's two ways I could go with this draft. Fuck it up. Get him. All right. All right, I'm doing it. My first pick i'm taking mclemore i did not see that coming didn't even think about it

mclemore of mclemore and ryan lewis fame uh you know his songs, Thrift Shop, that one where he wondered if he was gay because he could draw. He's got the downtown song with Foxy. The downtown song that kind of rocks, Foxy Shazam. Yeah, Macklemore. He's of Irish heritage. He's from Seattle, Washington. I was going to say, taking somebody from Seattle as a Portlander, that's not some sort of sacrilege there? It's not easy for me to do. It hurt

a lot, but I did have to. I felt like I had to represent the best. I have two Irish friends on this podcast. I felt like I had to represent. That's who you thought we'd want to represent us? He got way too much hate. It really bothered me how much people hated that dude. See?

John loves him. H hated on him all he did all he did was was get he just did it and everybody was like fuck that fuck that song or not everybody but you know what i mean people just were piling on that guy just for succeeding well it was more it was mostly over what he was succeeding over i think that year that he won the grammy was kind of oh he he beat Kendrick, right? Yeah. He knew though. He even apologized afterwards. I guess I don't know what he was supposed to do

there. Forfeit. It's tough. I mean, you can leave it there, but you won. You can't not win. You know, you could leave it and be like, go give it to Kendrick or something, but you can't say, don't go back and unwin or something.

I don't know. It's not his fault. It's whoever's voted for him fault. I get that. Macklemore, dude. Macklemore. Macklemore. Wish he'd Mack-a-less.

Oh! There he is. Got him. Nobody's safe. Nobody's safe. I got Macklemore with my first pick, and that was my first guy on the board in general, so I'm really glad I got him.

Time for my second pick. I'm sorry. Mike, I'm sure you were trying to take this, dude. I'm sorry. Is it going to be who I think it's this, dude. I'm sorry to peel him. Is it going to be who I think it's going to be? I'm sorry to peel him off your board. He's an entertainer.

Is it going to be who I think it's going to be? He's a mogul. He's a businessman. He's an entertainer. He's an athlete. His name is Vince McMahon. Oh, no. You can have him.

No, I know I can have him. You can have the son of a bitch. That guy. I suppose he's irish what did that guy remember the xfl when he told the cameraman to not show the women's heads in the xfl he said do not show the cheerleaders heads like he said i don't remember that that's wild it's in that documentary he's a bad guy i think he's probably one of the he's probably low-key one of the worst people around he is terrible yeah i see what you're doing he's a i see where you're going you're gonna crash and burn you're shooting arrows at the hot air balloon he's a he's a labor villain he's a i see what you're doing here he probably pushes painkillers he's uh he's just evil he's all he's he's done that too yeah he's a terrible guy but uh mike you could talk more about vince

mcmahon's nefariousness uh yeah he's a rotten piece of shit uh big contributor to the trump uh campaign just keeping trump around uh his wife was his labor secretary which is amazing for a dude who has reclassified his full-time employees as independent contractors so he doesn't have to give him health insurance and they can't also they also can't work outside of his company uh yeah he's a real son of a bitch uh fuck him uh it's not like i'm ever gonna have to worry about like costing myself a job saying that i've told them i don't want to work for them three times now yeah so they're fucking awful let's see what you're doing here but on the other to defend him in a defend funny walk funny walk

pretty funny walk the do-rag the do-rag is funny feels like he got really into steroids in his 50s which is an interesting thing to do he uh the character of mr mcmahon fucking rules like that was especially like when stone cold and him were like fucking at their height like that he stuttered their whole family oh yeah absolutely the mother yeah the mother got it too didn't he beat him with a bedpan in a hospital he sure as hell did hit him right in the head with a bedpan for real or that was wrestling i mean he you heard him get you can hear it get kabonked off his fucking head i mean no i mean but like a bedpan has a pretty distinct sound and i don't think they had a uh i'm saying was it real life beef or was it i it... Of course the bedpan hit him in the head.

No, it was a work. It was in a hospital. They kind of had to get clearance to have cameras there. You didn't see it on the movie channel at college? No. Yeah, it was on the movie channel at college. Kabonk is what they used to call boners before boners. Yeah, kabonk, dude.

Back when boners were bloopers, kabonks were boners. The Empire Kabonk Building. Ah, that ladies' gams. That Phyllis gams have given meopers, kabonks were boners. The Empire Kabonk Building. Ah, that ladies' gams. That Phyllis gams that give me a real kabonk. Sean Jordan, time for your first pick. Second pick.

Second pick, I'll go an actual person and I'm going to pick Van Morrison. Oh! I like the idea of Van morrison you have to watch belfast you what it yeah so i didn't like a fucking crazy right wing anti-vaxxer dude now van morrison yeah look i don't know man i just love every i don't know he's just amazing i i mean i'm going strictly off his voice and not of his political views, I guess. I know he wants to rock your gypsy

soul. I don't know if he's gone crazy. That's the one thing stopping that song from being at my nuptials. I don't know that he's... Is he a crazy anti-vaxxer? If he is, he's earned it. Van Morrison outs himself as a right-wing anti-Semite. Oh, that's different than

vaccines. What did he say about us? uh oh he's a big fan of conspiracy theories oh he said you guys are lizards it looks like he did is that bad is that is that good or bad he's a lizard i don't know he wears a fedora so that could be like a cool slang all right sure those jews are a bunch of lizards and it's like oh thanks man you know and that means a lot coming from you van yeah dan morrison anti-semite hold on i did not know that i had no idea i i didn't i i didn't think to look up his political views i just was going based off the angelic voice man morrison never looks like i want him

to and i don't know what i mean by that yeah i know what you mean you know what i'm saying he's ugly yeah i think when i picture him singing i actually am viewing or i'm thinking of jackson brown yeah every time i feel like i envision him saying i'm like wait no that's that's jackson brown you're thinking of now if you want if if you actually want Pat Jordan to show up from the grave, then keep talking about Jackson Brown a little bit more. Oh, Jackson Brown, I love. He's not an anti-Semite as far as I know. You get a bottle of Smirnoff, a pack of Marlboro Reds, and every Jackson Brown tape in the world, Pat Jordan might make it back to this realm. You never tried that, Sean?

No, I don't need him here that bad. Sorry to interrupt. Van Morrison put out a song called They Own the Media. No, he didn't. That's what he... He didn't even try to hide it? He doesn't mention Jews in it? He doesn't mention Jews in it? He doesn't mention Jews specifically.

Isn't that in... He did not, did he? What are the lyrics to the song? He did. He also said... Also, it turns out in parentheses after Brown Eyed Girl, it's Brown Eyed Girls Blink Sideways Because They're Lizard People is the full name of that song. He has a song called Why Are You On Facebook?

Yeah. I'm like, not bullshitting. This latest album was like an anti-lockdown playing all the hits. Playing all the fucking right-wing shit. We've also got a song called Into the Mystic. That song rocks. Yeah, well, fucking fine. Whatever, dude.

I'm sorry. Van Morrison rocks. A lot of people get crazy in their old age. Yeah. I guess Van Morrison and David both don't like masks. What do you want to do about it? But Belfast is great. A lot of other Irishish people are in it so i won't say who but it's like an all van morrison soundtrack okay you would love it i'll watch it i watched what if the other night have you ever watched just to isaac's been sweating me for oh dude seriously years to watch

that movie it's great yeah it was tight. Very Canadian. Dude, I called this. I was like, that's Toronto. I called it. I was pretty stoked. Marissa. And you pronounced Toronto correctly. The one Toronto.

Nope. Toronto. What? Toronto? Toronto. You don't say the second T, bro. Toronto. Toronto.

You know when you say Baltimore, you're supposed to say Baltimore? Yeah. Baltimore. I watched The Wire. Yeah. you're supposed to say Baltimore? Yeah. Baltimore. I watched The Wire. Yeah. I'm not doing anything they tell me. He's a police. He's a police.

Sean took Adolf Hitler. Mike, time for your second pick. I'm still going to have a good day. I'm surprised Sean left this one on the board, considering he's the creator of his favorite beverage. I'm taking John Jameson. Ah, yes. I didn't even know that guy had a first name.

I didn't know it was someone's name, obviously. Wait. Of course it is, but I don't know what I thought. I never thought about it. But, oh, man, good job. Hell yeah. Good job. At least I know that now. Not a lot of explanation needed on that one. He makes me envious. Oh, no, man, good job. Hell yeah. Good job. At least I know that now.

Not a lot of explanation needed on that one. He makes me intrigued. Oh, no, yeah. He makes our medicine. When was John Jameson alive? I assume he's dead, as he invented Jameson. J. Jonah Jameson. Probably like 1700s, if I'm not mistaken.

I'm looking. 1780s when it was introduced. Yeah. John Jameson and his family john jameson was originally a lawyer he was scottish oh no mike mulloy yeah but he lived in ireland most of his life didn't that don't make it it's an but it's an irish distillery yeah i mean i can work at pizza on so i'm an american he became the most important distilling family in ireland i think he counts i yeah i think you're gonna get the irish the irish vote of confidence moved to dublin

yeah yeah he counts yeah yeah he spent most of his life in ireland yeah john jameson did uh do you think that's the liquor you've drank the most of i bet it's jaeger my way were you talking to me or mike everyone yeah i can't there's no way to tell man does malt liquor count or it's you're just saying like liquor no hard liquors yeah it's either that or vodka it's's that or Jägermeister. Unfortunately, there was a... Jägermeister. I mean, decades of that. I honestly bet it's Jäger. Because that was Adam and I before years into Portland, honestly, we'd still drink that.

And yeah, so yeah, probably that. I'm trying to think. Like one brand name. I drink a lot of Hendrix gin. Yeah, you're a gin guy i like i like that one tequila although i have to rail against your auntie uh ryan reynolds thing because aviation gin's probably the only good celebrity uh alcohol that's fine i'm just tired of the vibe i like how you strapped that's fine you lean forward he didn't invent it that's a portland oregon no that's a he bought

into that late but there's guys like fucking the rocks tequila is fucking horse shit i'm sure george clooney's tequila is fucking horse shit i'm sure it's fine uh no it's no they're not they're terrible oh i guess you know more about liquor than us it's so the here's the thing with tequila is you're allowed to use like one percent of like additives and they go casamigos and the rock shit go like right up to the brim with that they're like we're using every fucking every atom of that one percent don't they make it taste better they put vanilla extract in it it's not good it's fucking not tequila it's gross sounds fine to me yeah i like costa migos too give me a little vanilla espalones half the price and a lot better okay so switch to that i think what that tequila i drank a ton of is

hornitos hornitos it might be hornitos i've had the most of yeah i never was it yeah tequila never really did it it's it is late like the last five years I've gotten into it. Palomas, love them. What's a Paloma? Tequila, grapefruit juice, lime, and either soda water or squirt.

It's so good on a hot day. Which a lot of people think is pee, but it's not. Squirt? That's the second time I've got you guys with that one. I really liked it. I bet there'll be three more. Yeah, I liked it a lot. Yeah, I'm taking Fast and Furious me with those.

I'll take nine, ten of those. John Jameson, distiller of whiskey, important distiller of whiskey, distiller of whiskey Distiller of whiskey Wrecker of our lives John Jameson David Borey Time for your second And your third picks I'm gonna sail away

With this pick Enya Yes Ooh nice Yeah I was I thought she was gonna go First round She lives in a castle

She's amazing I had her I had her on the board But I already took I already took a singer So I didn't wanna You know I wanna diversify She lives in a castle now Yeah she lives took a singer, so I didn't want to diversify. She lives in a castle now?

Yeah, she lives in a castle in Ireland. I want to see a castle. How many of you have seen a castle? I am. I'm raising my hand. A white castle. You've seen castles, David, just casually in France, probably. Oh, yeah.

And I went to Buckingham Palace. Yeah. Do we have any castles here in the States? Like, you know, kind of. Rhode Island has a bunch of them. Oh, there's that first castle, right? Yeah. Like a castle like I would see in Europe?

Yeah. Not really. Castles like you see in Europe are like where knights were. I want to see some shit like that. You know where you could go? Fucking Ireland. I think i've tried to if i tell you guys my dad was gonna take me one time and then my mom shut it down because he owed like 20 grand in child support

and i was so mad at the time and now i look back like of course she wasn't gonna be like all right go look cool instead of paying me child support take him to ireland and probably get him drunk when he's 10 uh inya inya sail away sail away sail away i don't know anything about inya yeah do people like that music anymore seems like a weird early 90s for some reason i thought you were queuing up christopher. I was like, wait. I don't think he's Irish. He's something. He's gravel. Enya is mad Irish.

Her name. The way it's anglicized is Enya Patricia Brennan, but the way it's spelled is like Eithne Padreginin Nibrohninin. It's crazy. She was born in Gwydor in County Donegal in the Gaelic region. Oh, man. Dude, she's mad Irish.

Yeah, she's got it. She's got that Irish look. She looks Irish. It's fun. She rocks. Her music is so good. It's fun. She rocks. Her music is so good. It feels good. Yeah, she lives in a castle in Kilney County, Dublin.

Yeah, I don't. I mean, maybe I've heard a different Enya song, but I can only think of the one. Did she do that? C'est de moi. Maybe. Yeah, that was a weird time. Yeah. What was it? Like late 90s, kind of of i feel like it was like early 90s the pure moods commercials yeah like the chanting the chanting album like

people were into weird religious music but yeah edga uh this is reading her personal life section it's amazing what she's been doing she's attracted the attention of several stalkers one time a guy wearing her picture around his neck in in italy stabbed himself outside her parents pub oh got all that so irish well no yeah yeah it is the parents pub all that yeah uh she has a planet named after her what oh there's a newly discovered species of fish lepronus enye which was found in the Orinoco River drainage area was named after her. She made it. What else, dude? I'm looking into enya deep.

I'm going on a deep dive. Yeah, you know more than me now. I'm out of my element. She's more spiritual than religious. That makes sense. She bought a Victorian grade A listed castellated mansion, which is a castle for 2.5 million whatever the Irish dollar was. That feels cheap. Yeah, that feels like. Yeah,

formerly known as Victoria Castle. She renamed it Manderley. What does that mean? Wow. And she's got a SoundCloud. She ranks third on the list of wealthiest Irish entertainers after Macklemore. You say she's got a SoundCloud? Yeah. I don't know. She rappers. After Macklemore. You say she's got a SoundCloud? Yeah.

I don't know. She rapped. After Macklemore and Ryan Lewis. She's got four Grammys. Good, dude. I might have an Enya afternoon. I think you should. I think you got an Enya.

Yeah. Oh, there he is. He's back. He's back, baby. Sean Patrick. Enya. Yeah. Oh, there he is. He's back. He's back, baby. Sean Patrick. Enya, and your third pick, David. Oh, there it is. Enya, third pick.

I think I'm going to go with a fake this time. And I am going to pick Priest Valent from uh gangs new york oh yeah the top dude that that dude is tough as fucking nails yeah man that movie is so good i was thinking while i was putting this list together and obviously i've gone a different direction it's been so long since i've seen gangs in new york i might have to watch that tonight that's exactly that's exactly the sentence you say when you go and watch it yeah that's a good nap movie too it's long yeah it's like it's it's so intense the whole time there's not it's whenever i watch that i really want to watch it it's not i don't really just throw it on yeah dude dude he's so good i mean if we're taking priest if we're taking priest valen are we i mean no he's not off the board i don't think

it'd be it'd be weird if someone took him at this point right though i mean i don't think anybody's going to after that whole i'm hunting for a black guy interview? Or is that exactly why I take him? I see what you're doing. I see what you're doing here. I don't know if anybody's going to take him after that. But

they could. I just don't want to discourage anybody from doing it. But I will bring up the whole a black guy hurt my friend. So now I'm going to just kill a random one. Interview. You know, a lot of people have interviews.

He said he felt like that for like a day. He didn't kill anyone. Maybe keep that to yourself. Maybe just fucking pocket that feeling. That's not the Irish way, dude. Real out of pocket, the Irish. He was the leader of the Dead Rabbits. Didn't he beat people with a cross?

Yeah, he took a cross in the battle. Man, that's gnarly. Yeah, what else do you want? Bill the Butcher said he was the best man he ever knew or something, right? Something like that. Bill the Butcher had no honor, and he still honored the priest. That's how Buck the Priest was. He was like, Bill the Butcher gave a shit about him.

That's Buck. Yeah, he wouldn't let him cut off his winky. This is a kill. Is that the name of the boner of the time? The winky? Pinky. Pinky. Pretty spelling. kill is that the name the name of the boner the boner of the time the winky pinky pinky what was the time period gangs in new york was it like revolutionary war time oh i don't know it was civil war it was the it was a it was a civil war it was during right because they were trying to like they were signing irish people up and stuff really wasn't there like

an explosion in New York? The Civil War didn't get up to New York, did it? Like isn't that the last battle? There's like a big explosion like a bomb. I mean they sent people from it but there wasn't a whole lot of action there. Yeah. Well, I don't know. Anyway. I think it was the 18, I think it looks like

here the gangs in New York is the 1840s. Which was 20 years prior to the civil war but there is no i mean america had a very shaky and violent history all over the place left and right dude it was complicated complicated um priest fallon mike time for your third pick oh didn't david go back to back he did oh wait you did okay yes. So write up fucking another Liam Neeson character, fucking Irish revolutionary, chairman of the provisional government of the Irish Free State and commander of the National Army during the Irish Civil War.

I'm taking Michael Collins, baby. Yeah. Okay. Are you taking the movie character,ael collins or the real guy the real guy there you go yeah yeah michael tell us a little bit about michael collins yeah you gotta run that down uh he was just the leader of the irish army during the um irish civil war during the 1920s i believe it was yeah uh fucking badass dude who was that? Fucking way prior to the IRA. IRA was like 1970s-ish area.

Okay. And to today, pretty much. The IRA is bad or is it good? Depends on who you are. If you're British, probably not so great. But, you know, hey, check under your car before you start it. Do they stand for the right stuff, though? Yes. What's the right stuff?

It's a New Kids on the Block song. Ireland being free and not under the rule of the British Empire. John Jameson. John Jameson's had a firm grip on Ireland and ain't going anywhere. Yeah.

Pretty straightforward. They were Irish. He was an Irish, like, led for Irish independence. Yes. Which is good. I'm awesome for that. Yeah.

Fuck the UK. Yeah. Well. Well, I mean, I don't know about all that. Broad swings. All right. Have you had their chocolate? I mean, are lints, are those British?

Those are Belgian. Those are Belgian, dude. Cadbury. Flakes, dude. The Brits are out here making fucking candy. That was almost my crypt name, British chocolate. But I chose six instead instead i landed on six with a c

i'm looking more into michael collins i don't know much about him i don't know much about irish people i'm just gonna say it i fucking thought this draft was gonna be real knocked out of the park and as soon as i sat down i had nothing i had nothing dog that's why i'm so quiet i ain't got shit i don't know what's going on over there no i think they like potatoes we do yeah we like distilling those potatoes even more oh he was killed in the irish civil war man ireland's complicated as any place subject to colonialism ends up being poignant huh thank you there it is there it is you got it thank you i said something today and laura looked at me what i said something i forget the context but i was like or rather maybe it's in the other room

and she goes oh rather don't make fun of me when i try don't make fun of me for trying you gotta power through it dude yeah yeah just keep using uh all right i'll say litigious at some point today first man through the wall uh sean time for your third pick i'm going real i'm going colin farrell yeah there you go the penguin i like i like me a colin farrell i always have i even like that speaking of college movies i went to the recruit in college it was like free movie night at the theater and the recruit was playing it was al al pacino and colin trail joint uh he was in scrubs i just like him i think he's dope have yet to see the batman i'm great i know i just yeah i just saw it's tough like i gotta

find a night where max is like sleeping properly and then i feel okay bailing but i it's gotta happen like monday or tuesday it's three hours so block off uh a good chunk of time oh i'm yeah i'll block off five hours dude i'm gonna go talk to myself about i'm so excited to see it it's great colin farrell's making cool moves like late he's becoming like a really interesting actor yeah absolutely because this batman movie he's doing crazy stuff and that apparently that after yang movie is really good well and he he got like weird another one of those dudes that got weird hate for i don't know he didn't do anything wrong he just was in movies i don't know just some dude and everybody said fuck him for a while really wasn't he he was wiling for a bit it wasn't he i think he was wiling he was like

drinking crazy he might have been cheating on people i don't know but yeah fine go for it what do i care imbruges fucking classic imbruges amazing that movie is hard the tv show the north water pit that movie is hard i haven't seen that uh but the north water is supposed to be really good that he plays a whaler yeah he's just tight man he's just uh he seems like um one of those people that if you met him he would be dope like he didn't we wouldn't seem like a famous dude he's been on the show a couple times and like you fucking get it that guy is beautiful and he looks beautiful so charming and then you throw the accent on top of it it's like i can't i i'm surprised he's ever not having sex i'm looking at him right yeah like he can take

enough time off just to go eat or something i'm looking at his so many movies is like amazing he's very attractive this man is beautiful yeah oh yeah swat i bet shane loves swat and phone booth too he's also in your favorite movie sean roman j israel esquire yeah obviously yeah you read my tattoos again what's going on wait sean who was your second pick it was real who was it van morrison yeah van morrison that anti-semite noted well noted now i didn't fucking know that colin farrell seems to be okay with the jews yeah true detective was kind of a stinker but he was the best part about the season he was in i will say that i never thought he wasn't widows though which which

was pretty cool yeah yeah oh this is great goodrell, man. Love him. Love him to death. Colin Farrell. Colin Farrell. Time for my third and fourth picks. Wow. Which way am I going to go? I think I see what you're doing. I think I see where you're going here.

Not necessarily. All right. I think I see what you're doing. Alec Baldwin. Whoa. Is he Irish? I had no idea. He's from Boston, right?

I'm not going to take that. That's not funny. The Russ tragedy was nothing to make a line of. I would have taken him before that because it would have been funny to do that. I thought you were just taking him because his daughter's named Ireland. The Baldwins are Irish. I didn't know that. It checks out.

They're from New York, I thought yeah but no but they're irish irish america uh another uh famous irish american bill o'reilly that is my third pick he's doing it i think i i think i see i think i see what you're doing here i love it i love it besmirching our people with this shit o'reilly i think i see where you're going with this. Am I besmirching your people? Author. Television personality. Bang.

You're lucky I'm not going to Google evil Jewish people and get put on a list. Go ahead and get put on that list. I'm not doing it. We run the media. Van Morrison will tell you. He wrote a song about it. Also, if you have to Google evil Jewish people, you haven't been paying attention. We're right out there.

I think I see what you're doing here. Oh. Oh, man. Bill O'Reilly. Bill O'Reilly. Bill O'Reilly factor. I have to do this to myself. He was a newsman in Portland, Oregon.

Really? Is that where he started? Yeah. He worked at KATU in Portland, Oregon for a few months. When? Like a long time ago? Yeah. Before he went back to Boston.

I mean, again, in his defense. Let's go. Let's hear it. Defend him. Smooth voice. Okay. let's go let's hear defend him smooth voice okay smooth irish voice um he's real tall tall boy that's that's his defense i mean he's tall you can't get mad at a tall guy what are we doing he feels tall smooth irish voice um how tall is this motherfucker and uh he's six four yeah i'm saying dude so he doesn't have that going yeah what a good defense oh no no no he's tall it's cool yeah he's tall loud don't worry about that he's tall and loud it's fine boisterous

boisterous voice bill o'reilly is my third pick and my fourth pick i think i see where you're going now i'm gonna take it i'm gonna go i'm gonna turn it back uh to somebody who might be a little controversial i'm taking lord of the dance michael flatley oh yeah yeah i forgot about that wait did he do some wild boy shit too not really he's just he's just the lord of the dance oh no you said he's controversial i don't remember i was gonna say no no more just more controversial than bill o'reilly who i think everyone agrees is one of the great irish americans michael flatley is not in good shape anymore he did play the he did play the trumpanong iteration michael flatley did yeah he doesn't know our politics he doesn't know our politics

it was just a gig oh no and he called it a great honor with a u he called it a great honor with a u yeah dance dance knows no politics he retired after that dance has no party well there's like dance parties but he came out of retirement for that shit wow he also owns a castle good for him he's the only other guy who could dress like prince you got to give it up for that all these motherfuckers getting castles i don't i don't got a castle. Good for him. He's the only other guy who could dress like Prince. You got to give it up for that. All these motherfuckers getting castles. I don't got a castle. This is bullshit. And you're never going to get one.

Shut up, Sean. I'm going to get one before you. He does dress like Prince. Yeah, it's crazy. Nobody else could pull that off. Yeah. He's the fucking Lord of the dance. He started wearing those big brimmed hats before white ladies.

Yeah. Remember how big Michael Flatley and The Lord of the Dance was? It was huge. It was on PBS all the time. Huge. It was everywhere. 300 million? Jesus.

America fell hard for Irish dance. Yeah, we were big into it. Yeah. He was really tan. It was Shen Yun before Shen Yun. Yeah. I'm watching a. It was Shen Yun before Shen Yun. Yeah. I'm watching a clip of him right now. People are in the crowd going fucking nuts.

Yeah. He doesn't have a shirt on. That's break dancing for white people. What if you saw Prince in the crowd? I would go. I wouldn't be surprised. Prince had to check out a show or two. He's white people's Jabberwockies, basically. Yeah, dude. He's amazing. Jabberwockies are white people's shabawakis basically he's amazing

white what jabberwock is their white people's jabberwock they're not white but they're four white people yeah they sure like them uh yeah dude michael flatley of the lord of the dance see i'm not just sticking it to you i'm trying to paint a broad spectrum no you got all the types in there for every for every for every macklemore and vince mcfann there's a bill o'reilly and michael flatley yeah what a fucking juxtaposition those are did macklemore actually do something wrong that i'm missing no okay all right great neither did michael flatley other than play the trumpet i'm telling you i'm giving you a broad spectrum right no i feel you i feel you. I feel you. I feel you.

I feel you. Uh, Sean, time for your fourth pick. I'm going to go. I'm going to go fictional. Actually, you know what,

Sean, before you make that fourth pick, why don't we take another short break? This episode of all fantasy. Everything is brought to you by Babel. Uh, if you want to learn a new language, the best way is to uproot your entire life.

You drop everything you're doing. Just go to a brand new country. You figure way is to uproot your entire life. You drop everything you're doing, just go to a brand new country. You figure it out from there. But this isn't the talented Mr. Ripley. All right? You're not Jason Bourne. You can't do that. Two Damon movies. I'm out here. Obviously, you're not ready for that, but you still want to learn a new language because everyone in the world knows new languages. They know multiple languages, and we all only know one. knows new languages. They know multiple languages and we all only know one. Get it done with Babbel. Babbel is going to help you the quickest way possible. You speak like a whole new you when you got Babbel. It's science-backed language learning app, and it's going to get you talking fast. It's science-backed. What else do you want?

Wasting hundreds of dollars on private tutors. That's the old school way to learn a new language. Babbel, they have these 10-minute lessons. They're quick. They're handcrafted by over 200 language experts. And they're ready to get you talking in three weeks, ready to get you speaking a new language. I should say speaking a new language. You don't talk a language. Anyway, talking is the key to really knowing any language. You have to. You got to do it. You got to be saying it out loud. And Babbel, they have tools. They have tools on the app where you can speak the language. You have to, you got to do it. You got to be saying it out loud. And Babbel, they have tools. They have tools on the app where you can speak the language. They'll help you with your accent. There's things where on the app, they will talk to you and then you can decipher what they said. It's all the real world applications that you're going to need to

actually use it. You know, Babbel's tips and tools, like I said, they're grounded in real life situations. Everything's focused on conversation. So you're going to be ready to talk everywhere you go because that's the key. Conversation. You want to know how to get by, right? And like I said, little 10-minute segments. They're perfect for, say, someone like myself. Don't have a huge attention span. 10 minutes in and out. Boom. You're done. And don't just try word-for-word. Studies from Yale, Michigan State University. Shout out, boom, you're done. And don't just try a word for word. Studies from Yale, Michigan State University, shout out old ladies, alma mater and beyond, they prove that Babbel works. One study found that using Babbel for 15 hours is equivalent to

a full semester at college, which, come on, that's a no-brainer right there. So give it a try. Honestly, get up in there. And here's a special limited time deal for our listeners. Right now, Give it a try. Honestly, get up in there. And here's a special limited time deal for our listeners. Right now, you get up to 60% off your Babbel subscription, but only for our listeners at babbel.com slash all fantasy. Again, get up to 60% off at babbel.com slash all fantasy, spelled B-A-B-B-E-L dot com slash all fantasy. Rules and restrictions may apply. Hey, we're back. Welcome back to All Fans See Everything. Already in progress. We're about to get to Sean Jordan's fourth pick in the Irish fictional or non-fictional draft. Sean?

Before I pick, I just recommend that everybody puts a spoonful of lotion in their coffee next time. No. That'll really wake you up. That'll give you a nice little boner. I'm going gonna go fictional i'm going frank costello from the departed i was gonna go good one of the good guys from the departed but i'm not i want to watch the world burn he's fantastic in that movie it's like jack nicholson being such good jack nicholson is he irish he is he irish i i don't know i think i is costello an irish name i think so i'm oh i'm i'm in i'm in jack nicholson

jack nicholson is he i was wondering if he's irish he's not right and i should have looked i didn't even think to look at like the real people were Irish or not. The only thing I know about Jack Nicholson's personal life is that the woman that raised him was actually his grandmother. It was his sister. The woman he thought was his sister was actually his mother. Yeah. What? He thought his...

The woman who birthed him, they pretended was his sister, but it was actually... When did he... Well, that's gnarly god i think i did i don't think he found out until he was like in his 20s what a crazy thing his mother was of irish english german and welsh descent and his dad was uh italian america is welsh is welsh like scott what is where's where's is it is like on the english island yeah okay you know who's welsh katherine zeta jones oh yeah yeah surprisingly a lot of welsh people famous people i don't know if there's a surprising amount of welsh people there's a lot of welsh out there uh yeah frank costello man i um it's just dope dope movie dope role very fun based on uh based on now disqualified

ian carmel future pick whitey bulger yeah why wasn't disqualified i didn't know that i didn't know it was based on a real person i had had no idea. Really? Yeah. No way. When? When was Whitey Bulger? Whitey Bulger just got caught maybe five years ago. Yeah, they just got him, right? He was on the FBI's most wanted list for like two decades. He went into hiding.

No way. Right before the indictment was about to drop because his brother was a fucking state senator and got tips on that sort of thing. Yeah. That's more fun than Frank Costello. I didn't know thatello they caught him out there they caught him in santa monica i didn't know there was a real version of that's where i would run too yeah yeah straight to pinkberry get as far away from boston as you can they'll never find me

here at the chick-fil-a i want to go to that fucking place from the everclear song that's where i'm going santa monica when i was leaving south boston was right when they were shooting black mass and there was like nine a bunch of like 1970s cop cars around for filming and then when i got out here was when the movie was released and then they caught him like 10 minutes 10 minutes from where i was so that's wild they caught him close to that movie coming out right like it was almost like i think it was a couple months before black mass was about this guy who yeah jack nicholson's character in the part it was based on it's sort of yeah loosely crazy wild i didn't know that i did not man this is fun i'm learning all kinds of shit today i'm gonna have knowledge all

day knowledge day dude it's a knowledge day for sean big time tomorrow's leg day and then back day but today's knowledge day jack nicholson did a most important muscle god awful boston accent in that movie though yeah it wasn't great one of the worst how hard is it to do a good boston accent is it that hard it's pretty hard based on what some of our best actors are pulling out a lot of people really don't do it that great. I feel like it's really easy to overcommit, though. Yeah. Mike, what's the best forced Boston accent that you can think of? In a movie or whatever.

I don't know. Is the town good? Well, B-Lo's from Boston, right? He shouldn't be faking. That's a real accent, right? And Matt Damon? Yeah, they're both from there. Those are probably real. Roughly, yeah. Because you hear Ben Affleck

in Good Will Hunting and you're like, to me it sounds bad, but that's probably real. It's a real Boston accent, I assume. At the time, he wasn't even gone from Boston yet, right? No. I'm pretty sure they had left by that point. They were in Santa Monica already?

Probably, yeah. Santa Monica. Yeah, Frank Costello. There's lists of the best Boston accents. Apparently, Holly Hunter in Once Around has the worst. Okay.

I know that, was that Kate Wate winslet show that just was out oh uh i know it's not boston but mayor of easttown yeah that got a lot of shit right for everyone trying to do their their philly accents or their uh pittsburgh accents pittsburgh is a weird accent though and they say yinz it's all weird over there yeah dude ben harkins just told like well whatever few months back or whatever but he told me what yinz it's all weird over there yeah dude ben harkins just told like well whatever few months back or whatever but he told me what yinzers were i never i'd never heard that word oh yeah you you you it's like you guys right yeah but they didn't like what are you doing he said that in pittsburgh they'll call like i don't know that the dudes that'll wear a hockey jersey

to the opera let's say like that'd be a yincer. That's just who they generalize. Trashy white dudes as yincers. I didn't know that. Apparently Blake Lively in the town has a good Boston accent. She looks like she does the lip thing. She looks like she's from Boston. Obviously, I can't do it, but she just has

the look. Blake Lively is a woman? Yeah, it's Ryan Reynolds' wife. I'm thinking of Blake Shel shelton i'm sorry sorry about that they are so different different blakes man that's tight oh they're gonna blake mike your fourth pick uh i'm going with a man now close your eyes and picture a tiny man done sprinting as fast as he can don't you fuck you man hits the trampoline hits the trampoline does two complete rotations in the air and then dunks a basketball lucky the leprechaun baby give him to me motherfucker is he wait is he for the celtic

i was oh yeah i was gonna take him next i was straight up about to take him you motherfucker oh yeah i got him baby uh yeah lucky the leprechaun celtics rule uh i fixed them they're good now lakers drool you know what i'm talking about absolutely how did you fix them they i listen i prayed i put you know i i fucking did you did you pray to god yeah i made it happen jason tatum best ever do it future mvp love it victor page or monty buckley are the best to ever do it just so we're clear lucky the leprechauns like i know he's the mascot on the logo. Is he also like a real dude? I mean. Or does like a guy portray him?

Yeah, there's like a guy who portrays. I think right now it's a black guy that is lucky. He is lucky to get that job in Boston. Yeah. I knew there was something there. Lucky the Leprechaun. So it's just a dude in like a bowler hat and a vest out there throwing down sick dunks oh yeah does he not have a mascot head he's got a mascot head no no they just let him

no let him live it's just a black dude yeah oh that's great i'm about to hold on let me see if this is a big day in boston they just let that happen drop it in the chat ian i don't know if i believe this. This isn't the black eye. I can't find it. But this is a crazy picture. I think last year it might have been. Well, there should be some images.

I'm posting a picture of a guy in a bowler hat and a vest covered in shamrocks going between the legs on a dunk. Nothing makes you look less athletic than a shamrock vest and a bowler hat as I'm looking at this guy. Oh, that is a bad look. Look at that picture. That's the worst ever. Mike, we need to recreate this. I was confused. It's a white guy.

No, it's the Notre Dame mascot was a black guy recently. That's what it was. I got my Irish. Another insane fucking picture like i know trampolines are involved in this oh wait i was confused he was white but this guy's like a foot above the rim two feet above the rim oh yeah that's that's slam ball that's classic he'd give that uh that gorilla in phoenix a run for his money what would have had to where where where was the where was the fork in your life where you didn't become lucky the leprechaun at what a at what age i don't know

because i'm looking at it and he's making about a fucking 150 a year to be a fucking mascot well it's when you made the choice to be in a summer catch instead of uh instead of mascot school what was that what was that movie about the celtics with um celtic pride it's when you decided to be in summer catch instead of celtic pride there it was that was it summer catch what was your role in summer catch again i was just a bullpen i wasn't i was i was an extra sean i wasn't in it i was the fucking extra you were in the movie summer catch and i will hear nothing less yeah in full catcher's gear nobody can fucking see me well you were just wearing that anyways what i'm hearing is it's not too late for you to become the next lucky the leprechaun listen it's uh i'm i'm ready i've been

ready this victor the viking came out to my show in minneapolis so we got a mascot hookup you guys need to talk about your name you've never said like his i don't know if i can i don't know if i can i don't think you're allowed to you got a chance yeah is it secret it's a secret identity probably yeah i don't know if i tell you what if you want me to say your name dm me but otherwise ext, the assassination attempts, it's just to protect his family, I think, more than anything. Minnesota Nice goes out the window real quick as soon as they find out his name. I'll tell you that.

Yeah. It becomes Minnesota Ice, as in they throw you in a hole in the lake. Or her name, as soon as they find out their name. Oh. Wow. I left my cape in the closet, but I have it. All right. Yeah, yeah.

David, time for your fourth and then your final picks i i i listen guys i tried my best on this one it's a weird list it's a weird list i don't know what to say yeah i drafted musicals i drafted vegetables it's all right i don't know if he is irish for real but he is the palest man I've ever seen with a shirt off. I'm taking Seamus the wrestler. Oh, yeah, he's Irish. Okay, that guy is. I've never seen anything like that. Yeah, he's translucent.

I've never seen anything. Yeah, I remember when he first came out. It was like, it was so, I've never, yeah, I've never seen that in life. I'm pretty sure if he got sick, it would look like E.T. where you could, like, see his could like see his organs oh it's crazy and do you know what this guy looks like whoa he's a fail boy holy shit good that guy is shredded i hope he never hears this draft he's he's one of the ugliest hot guys i've ever seen in my life it looks like brian cook got the hulk serum like if cook was if cook's rage could sculpt his body that's what he would look like yeah like if his attitude could shred him up wow but also look how bright he is man he is

it's wild he's growing up man now i think he's hot yeah it only took me 20 seconds and he's hot there's not a lot of dudes who i would be like that is the exact physical opposite of me but this guy seems like he seems like one of those dudes who can drink all he wants and he's always going to be this shredded because i can't picture this guy not hammered projection yeah that guy he's a specimen what's his finishing move i don't even remember uh it's called the brogue kick he just kicks you in the head as hard as he can i love that when they it is funny when they give a name and you're like oh did you just kick him yeah he just like drops the leg now his real name is stephen farrelly I'll buy that. I'll buy everything.

He's from Dublin. Oh, I didn't know he was Irish-Irish. Oh, nice. Good pick, David. How many finishing moves could you name, Mike? Thousands, probably. You get the fuck out of town. Let's not do it. I mean, finishing moves are just like any wrestler.

The DDT. If I had to just sit there and I could probably list 10 moves from every wrestler that I've watched in the last 20 years. So yeah, multiply that by 300 wrestlers a year.

It's like you and skateboarding, Sean. You can do all that stuff. I can't yeah all right okay i'll shut the fuck up shut up dude shame is the wrestling and your final pick david i'm taking from the boondock saints which one is he their dad when he has the best of like seven guns oh yeah yeah he's a comedian right what's this guy's real name billy connelly yeah yeah that guy yeah i was if i was uh if i was doing this draft if you're it'd be one that you'd take he's scottish though is the only problem with billy connelly

but el duche is is i'm sure this infuriates both parties but is there a huge difference yeah well there's like a heritage right yeah like the difference between like a canadian and american it's maybe the difference between yeah or like the spanish and the portuguese maybe like you know it's a long yeah that seems it seems like a bigger gap to me but yeah different cultures it's infuriating i'm sure for both parties if i were to you're irish It's a long history. It seems like a bigger gap to me. Different cultures. It's infuriating, I'm sure, for both parties. You're Irish. You don't know the difference?

How do you feel? Yeah, what do you think about it? Pretty hammered most of the time. That's how I feel. Listen, guys, I'm not here for the Irish stereotypes. Me neither. I'm trying to paint a picture of the full spectrum. I did not say anything about fighting this whole thing, and I could have.

I could have a couple times. Yeah. Do you feel particularly Irish, Sean? No. I mean, if dad was still around, sure. I think he really pushed it. If my grandma, too. I just never got to see my grandma really like a ton.

But she was mad Irish from Ireland ireland so wait you're second generation i didn't know that i don't know if that's how it works i mean that's just one like my grandpa wasn't and neither no one on my mom's side is oh so so it's like pretty diluted my dad would also have you believe that i'm 164th lakota i've heard that from a lot of white dudes if he finished the bottle i was 116th lakota i don't i don't i'm at the i'm at the point where i don't believe white people when they say they're native american and irish you shouldn't how do you know dude i swear how do you know the less vodka that was in the bottle the more lakota was in our blood is that's that's how that pump worked for my dad it'd be hilarious and then you get my grandpa talking about it

because by his math he was like 1 8th Lakota if you could have seen Buck Jordan there's no way there was any Lakota in that man it's just shocking did he want some? alright come on guys I'm back maybe Lakota was just a brand

of cigarettes that he smoked yeah leather cigarettes for Buck Jordan it was his bourbon yeah pass me the Lakota uh pass Mike the final pick all right I am taking uh Sean alluded to the the IRA earlier and I'm taking the leader. Whoa, whoa, whoa. The leader of the IRA during the Troubles who after, his name was Patty McGee and after he tried to kill, after he tried to kill.

Wait, he was a cartoon character? I didn't know that. Patrick McGee, yeah. After they tried to kill Margaret Thatcher in the Brighton hotel bombing, he said that you only have to, or he goes, you have to be lucky every time. We only have to be lucky once.

Oh, that's icy, which is a fucking badass thing to say after you just didn't murder somebody. I like that. I like that a lot. That's icy. Was that who in the name of the father was was based, right? That didn't Liam Neeson not play that guy too or am i insane oh i don't know i haven't seen that one or maybe in the name of the father was that um daniel day lewis anyway i thought it was about that guy patty mcgee i don't know

anything about the troubles uh yeah fucking they were worrisome they were pretty troublesome they graduated from the worries right it started the worries, and then it became the troubles. And right now, it's the mild concern at best. Yeah. Settle down to a case of the crankies. Yeah. Sean, your final pick? I'm going to go Cillian Murphy.

Oh, okay. I love Cillian Murphy. I just think he's a rad, rad dude. He's fun. I don't even know who that is. Yeah, you do. He's in Peaky Blinders. Yeah.

Oh, I've never seen that. He's got cheekbones for days. He's dope. His eyes are, you just get lost in the man's eyes. He's just, I don't know. He's just very, very fun. I like Cillian Murphy a lot. I didn't know you said Cillian.

I thought it was Cillian this whole time. Well, it might be Cillian. I think it's Cillian. Ian, what do didn't know you said cillian i thought it was killian this whole time what might be killing i i think it's silly ian what do you think oh he was in the dark okay yeah he played the scarecrow yeah yeah okay i think it's silly and he was in sunshine that danny boyle movie that was fantastic he's just dope he's got one of those faces where you're like i think this guy could be a perv yeah he's got perv face but like he's like beautiful but not attractive he's one of those guys where you're like i don't think you're real he's like sheamus yeah sheamus yeah like on the taylor joy where i'm like you're beautiful but not attract like what are you yeah what's going on there what is this what's going on on? Get her. Hey. You know,

there's just people like that. They're elven. Yeah, like a Cillian Murphy. Yeah. Cillian Murphy head. Cillian Murphy. Cillian Murphy.

Time for my final pick. It's the Lucky Charms Leprechaun. Dang it. That wraps up the Irish draft. Yeah. Marissa. That was 100% my next pick. You almost got it. I almost got it.

Dang it. Marissa, I take the Lucky Charms Leprechaun as my final pick. People are always stealing his Lucky Charms. Poor guy. Leave him alone. You know this? Rainbows are round. Rainbows are round in the sky. You know that?

There's no end to the rainbow. It's a circle. It's in the sky. I don't understand what's happening. I didn't know i'm just letting them know sean do you think like a rainbow is like physically there i did until maybe three years ago okay i really thought i wanted to i really thought that that they like were on that there was like an arc that they you could find the end of a rainbow i really did i didn't know there were circles in the sky until quite recently somebody wasn't paying attention during the water lesson in elementary school he was crimping dude i didn't pay attention to a lot of school but yeah marissa do you have a pick not anymore i had the whole lucky charms wikipedia page up here well you can write here. It can be our pick.

You can rattle off some facts. I mean, he's just an absolute influence. I mean, that cereal was magically delicious. Yeah, everyone wanted his marshmallows. That was my first introduction to Irish people as a kid. Lucky the mascot. Yep. Same here?

Same here? Yeah, most say that. To recap, David, you went first. You took John F. Kennedy, Enya, Priest Valen, Seamus the Wrestler, and El Duce from Boondock Saints. Mike, you went next. You took Dolores O'Riordan, John Jameson, Michael Collins, Lucky the Leprechaun, and Patty McGee.

Sean, you went third. You took Bobby O'Shea, Van Morrison, Colin Farrell, Frank Costello, and Cillian Murphy. I went last, and I took Macklemore, Vince McMahon, Bill O'Reilly, Michael Flatley, Lord of the Dance, and the Lucky Charms Leprechaun. Oh, that's tight. We left a lot.

I mean, a lot of great picks on the board. All the other Irish people, really. All the other Irish people. I went the dark route, but I had a whole list for the light route. The dark route. There's also Mike and Sean. Mike and Sean. Chris O'Dowd. You know who Chris O'Dowd

is? He was in Drive-Thru. You know him? Yeah. He's hilarious. He's in a lot of movies. I loved him in the IT crowd. Yeah, he's great. Fantastic. Michael Fass of movies. I loved him in the IT crowd. Yeah, he's great. Michael Fassbender's Irish, which I didn't know. Sinead O'Connor.

He's born in Germany. His mom's Irish. Oh, okay. All right. Peter O'Toole. Mariah Carey, according to Wikipedia. Sasha Ronan. Kenneth Branagh.

Brendan Gleeson's ass. He's fucking awesome. Pierce Brosnan? He's Irish. Yeah, Pierce is Irish. Mason Plumlee? F. Scott Fitzgerald is an Irish-American. I mean, James Joyce,

Oscar Wilde. She do something bad? No. She ripped up a picture of the Pope, which was why everybody was mad at her. She's mentally troubled, but I don't think she's hurt anybody. She eats her dinner in a fancy restaurant.

I love that song. America's greatest World War II hero, Audie Murphy, was an Irish-American. Audie Dossler? Audie Dossler? No, he's German, right? I've been lying the whole time. None of these that I have said. I don't think Mason Plumlee is Irish.

I don't know, though. I don't know. Billy the Kid? Danny Boy from House of Pain. Bono and The Edge. Yeah. Danny Boy is Irish, but DJ Lethal isn't, apparently. Charles Barkley?

What? Charles Barkley is Irish. You know who's kind of dope? First generation. That Slane dude. He's in the town and shit. He's in Gone Baby Gone. He's the bigger guy who's one of the four people in the town, but he's also a rapper named Slane dude from he's in all the he's in the town and shit. He's like he's he's in Gone Baby Gone. He's the bigger guy who's one of the four people in the town.

But he's also a rapper named Slane. I don't know. He's kind of he's kind of tight. I think pretty sure he's Irish, but he's kind of don't look up Slane. It's fun. I'll tell you this. D. Day Lewis, Daniel Day Lewis.

Oh, really? England, but to a Irish father and tune in jewish mother somebody crossed the streams which means daniel day lewis is a jew if your mom's a jew he's a jew daniel day lewis great jewish actor three acting oscars great irish person great jew uh sean hannity is he really dude it's like you're ripping off my stepdad's favorite tv personality everlast um casper friendly ghost yeah wait is everlast everlast is in house casper van deem casper the friendly ghost is that not danny boy ever they're different he's the lead singer for house of pain who are not

from boston they're from long beach i thought that was danny boy who's danny boy i thought that he was in house of pain too yeah i think there are three of them yeah that's a full house there's a lot of pain in that house i didn't realize a lot of pain in that house. I didn't realize that. There are so many amazing Irish people. Really a massive and profound and overwhelmingly positive effect on

culture of the world and of America. Yeah, it was Everlast, DJ Lethal, and Danny Boy. I didn't know that. I didn't realize DJ Lethal was in there. Oh, yeah. Do you know him from something else? I've heard the name.

He was Limp Bizkit, wasn't he? He's got all his solo CDs. I don't know. Yeah, I'm pretty sure he was the Limp Bizkit's DJ, too. DJ Lethal was in Limp Bizkit? Yeah. Yeah, right? I didn't know that.

Wow. So he went from the first rap metal to new rap metal. He was in Limp Bizkit and House of Pain? Yeah. Put his jersey in the rafters. That's a rap rock legend. I'm not going to believe where he's from. The Soviet Union.

Yeah, he's Latvian. Latvian. This has been a weird day. This has been a weird, weird day. Big day, dude. It's not a Latvian matter. It's very serious.. This has been a weird, weird day. Big day, dude. It's not a Latvian matter. It's very serious. I like it. You son of a bitch.

Huh? That's the swing vote. Yeah, I'll give it to you. We want to hear yours. Hit us up at AllFantasyPod on Twitter, AllFantasyPodcast at Gmail.com. Shout out to everyone on the All Fantasy Everything Patreon. Thank you for holding us down. Shout out to everyone on the AFE Shaslackity, the

AFE subreddit. We love you. Shout out to Saint Sue Carmel. Shout out to Frankie Ocean. Shout out to Sid the Dude. Shout out to Haji Beats. And more important than all of that, tune in again next week to another brand new episode of All Fantasy Everything. Shaslackity!

That was a HeadGum Podcast.