All Fantasy Everything - Items from 'Seinfeld' (w/ Jay Larson)

Episode Date: March 12, 2026

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This is a headgum podcast. Welcome to another brand new episode of all fantasy everything, the podcast that fantasy drafts anything and everything from the world of popular culture. On today's episode, we are drafting items from Seinfeld episodes that we would like to have. Our guest today is comedian, writer, director, Jay Larson. What's up, boys? Chilling, man. How are we feeling?

I'm excited. I'm Ian Carmel, the host. These are my friends. and comedians. He just say that a copy shot. I'm the host. I'm the host. I'm the host.

I'm the host. And you are the virus. You're the free. I was going to say. Sean Jordan and David Bory. Here we are. We're in it. We're happening.

It's happening. That was the little bit of stand-up that happens before and now we're in the episode. That was stand-up right? That was just a little bit. You don't like the Sancho episode. Oh, right, right. It's been a while since I've really applaud myself. I love you when that's what people say to you after I said.

That was stand-up right there? That was stand-up? You call that stand-up? I've not not received that reaction. I think we've all got that. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Where, uh, it was your idea.

Where did, what, what, what hit you? What were you like this idea? I'm like, you know, I texted you and I'm like, do we, sports, food, you know, food's easy, candy. Love food. Yeah. Sports is, I gave you one sports idea and then, but, you know, entertainment. It was fun. Yeah.

But I was, I love Seinfeld, and I'm like, I also wanted to think of something that I could shine on. Yeah. No, you got to play to your strengths every time. Yeah, you're going to ask me, I'm going to come with it. This is my main show. This is number one. Number one?

Number one by far. I think, like, it was Simpsons when I was a kid, for sure. And even still, if I go back and rewatch it, I'm like, that's great. But this one ever since, like, it was originally airing. I think it's the greatest show of all time. I 100% agree. Of what it did, how funny it was. Yeah.

First of all, it was a multi-cam that played like a single cam. Yeah. They dance around things so perfectly. Remember when nuance was a thing? Yeah. And it didn't have to be like, you ready for the punchline? Yeah.

So many episodes you feel like they shouldn't have been able to get away with at the time for what was on network television. Yeah. And like, I can say at least the contest. Like where you're like, that was so not the tone of network television at the time. At all. No, but you know what's crazy? There are some things that they wouldn't,

you don't think they'd be able to get away with today. Go back and watch old Johnny Carson. You'd be like, how in the world? And then you see what the Tonight Show is now? You're like, Johnny Carson would roll over in his grave and be like, oh, my God. Way tamer. You couldn't even talk about drugs on a stand-up set. They'd be like, nah, you can't talk about drugs.

Oh, the whole country's on it. That's not network, by the way. That's like the shows themselves. Yeah. Because you can talk, I mean, obviously, you can talk about that stuff on like, on net. On the late late show when I worked on that, I just got done with a nine-month stand. on the Tonight Show working remotely.

Yeah. And you know, like we, you could do stand up on the late late show and you could talk about a lot that we saw had people talk about a lot of different stuff that like when you submit a set

to the Tonight show you get like noted to death on. Oh yeah. So it's just like it is show itself. That's like that administration over there being like, no, we don't want this being talked about. So we're categorizing it as an administration.

The administration on the tonight show. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Or whatever you want to call it. Just check it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. the administration like on that, that's like, you know, the Booker of that stamp being like, we don't want that talked about on this iteration of the iteration. There we go.

Of the Tonight Show and everything. Yeah. Yeah. But you can clear, you can talk about sex and drugs on network television, obviously. Obviously, yeah. Yeah, yeah. But, no, Seinfeld, they did it. They did it in a way.

Nobody else did it. Yeah. No one else did it. Those characters are so well defined. And I don't know about you guys, but, like, I think, like, when we're young, you were all about Bart Simpson because you're like, oh, Bart Simpson. And then you realize, oh, no, this is Homer's show. So when I became a huge Seinfeld fan, initially, I was like, Kramer.

And then all of a sudden you realize, like, no, it's George. Yeah, it's George. Yeah, completely. It is Larry David's avatar. Yes. Yeah. 100%. It's, I can't wait for this.

I didn't cut you off. I didn't love Seinfeld when it came out. I was just, it hit me wrong. Did you watch it? Did you give it a real chance? I didn't, not at all. Not until they came out on DVD. Fox sets?

I feel like even when this, let me cut you off. When this podcast started, you were a moment. If I could cut you off real quick. Okay. Okay, I'm going to cut you off, actually. I think you were more of like a Scrubs guy than even a Seinfeld guy. I still think Scrubs is like the best show ever made. That's not right.

Controversial. They're bringing it back. I know they are. I'm hyped. Scrubs are Friday night lights are the best friends. You're going to be so disappointed when they bring it back. They got the whole original cast. Because here's the thing.

I had a weird Scrubs time and then now I can't even rewatch it. Yeah. It gets on my fucking nerves. I will give you that. I try to watch you. Like, like shows, like Seinfeld now,

like Jerry would never bring that back. I mean, he's also worth a billion dollars. Yeah. But, you know, still's Bill Lawrence. But,

I mean, they did in curb. They, like, they did it perfect. Yeah. That was the perfect. That was the perfect.

Yeah. Yeah. They found a way to do it where you like, shit, you did a different finet. Like, you did it.

Yeah. That one more episode. Yeah. P.S. Mm-hmm. Your cunt is in the sink. But anyway, I love it now. It's just I was late to the game.

Sorry to say that word so early in the podcast. We're going to get demotized. The joke's Super Dave Osborne tells to Jerry Seinfeld in that episode. Yeah. And Jerry like bends on, like, clearly he's not supposed to break in that scene. He's supposed to be like, who is this idiot? And he can't help it. He like bends over laughing.

It's so great. Sorry to say that word. Sorry to use that word. I apologize. We say a sync all the time. time. It's not a huge. I love watching him on comedians and cars.

Signs that? No, Super Dave. Oh, Super Dave. Oh, Super Dave. Yeah. So funny. Was.

Was. Was. All right, peace. All right. Obviously, we all know this. But just in case you don't know. Spoiler alert. He's, no, he's dead.

And Albert Brooks's brother. I didn't know that. You didn't know that? He's Albert. I knew he was someone's brother. Man, something in the jeans in that family. His name is Bob Einstein. That's right.

Super Dave Osborne, the real guy, Bob Einstein, Albert Brooks's real name, Albert Einstein. He had to change it. Crazy. Had to change it. Yeah, you got to kind of. Alfred B. Einstein? Al-B.

Al-B. Einstein. Well, that was actually Al-B. Shores' name. That's right. Yeah, yeah. And I think about that guy night and day. Bro, he comes up more than you think in my life. That's a low-key right there.

That's a low-key. No, I like that. No, I like that. I just got comedian for Christmas, the old Seinfeld DVD. I haven't seen it. With Orney Adams in it? Wow. Watch you with the commentary.

No one has ever said that. The Oriane's second? Oh, wait, the one with Orney Adams? I asked for it. Watch it with the commentary. It's him and, I think, it's Seinfeld and Colin Quinn, I think. Yeah, I'm excited. They actually give Orney his flowers a lot.

If you watch it with the documentary or with the commentary, Colin's like, that was a great bit. They have to give him his flowers because they put him in a grave in the actual documentary. I think Orney may have him. I think Orney put himself before him. Because Orney is one of, you watch him, even today. You're like, God damn, that is so funny. Yeah.

So original. Yeah. Clean at time. You're just like, what? How? What are you like, it's got to be? So many hangups, the guy. Like, he just like gets in his own way, like with anxiety and everything.

Yeah. Anyway, I'm hoping to watch it. I haven't seen it a long time. Sinney? Hmm. Seinfeld? Or a comedian? No, the comedian.

I was like right when I started to stand up when it came out. Right now is actually, I feel like the longest time I've, probably gone in my adult life since I've seen an episode of Steinfeld. I think it's probably been about six months. Same. It's still on seven times a day. Yeah. Yeah, it's still on. Yeah. Um, well, Sean Jordan is here. Sean Cougar, Melon, Jordan.

When does this one come out? This is March? I'm saying March 12th, but I don't know for sure. I was just actually looking at the calendar. Oh, come to see us in New Orleans this weekend. Yeah. Come to see us in New Orleans this weekend. This upcoming. Yeah. Well, next week. By now I have next weekend. By now I have my short set that I'll be wearing.

pretty excited about it. We're all going to wear short sets in New Orleans. What's that? Doing a comedy festival. What's a great question? Matching shirt and shorts. So, like, I look at it like a Kemp, Jersey Kemp shorts. Got it.

To me, that's a short set. He definitely ran with basketball. Yeah. Yeah. Where it could just be like a fabric situation. Could be anything. Fabric. Sean Kemp was going to be on my draft of guys with the most swag.

Oh, my God. The other idea we were kicking around that we should still do is drafting an NBA team just based on like basically vibes alone. That's what I'm talking about. Sean Camp had as many kids as you should have for being an 18-year-old NBA player. You're like, he played it just... You're supposed to have less kids? He played it just right.

Why would I wear a condom? I just got signed. I'm the rain man. You wear a costume. You wear... You wear a costume. That's crazy. Do you have anything else you'd like to point people towards?

I don't think so. Definitely not now. Maybe I book something, but I don't know. I don't know right now. David Boy is here. Cool guy who jokes 87 on Instagram. Yeah, come to see us in New Orleans, man. Maybe my don't tell tells out.

I don't really know. Yeah. His don't tell us out. Sean's don't tell us out. You should watch Birth of a Nation on YouTube. Oh, yeah. Watch Birth of a Nation on YouTube with a G. Otherwise, you're going to get another movie.

I also had a lot to do with creatively. A little part of your career. Yeah. My first screening at the White House. Jay Larsen is here. Jay, this comes out beginning of March. Where can people see you either in person or anyway? Just check out my website or social media, Jay Larson, comedy,

because I just posted all there. Yeah. Yeah. Phenomenal. Thank you. I have nothing to promote other than come see us in New Orleans. It's going to be great. Read my book, T-shirt and Swim Club.

You can watch my special on YouTube. Comfort Beyond God's Foresight. I was there. Good time. Good in the room. Fun times. Good times. Both of you were there.

Yeah, we're in the wings. I didn't get an invite, but whatevs? Damn. Didn't feel like I could rise to the occasion with you in the room. I'd be too intimidated because I respect you so much. It's embarrassing. Before we start, if we're doing embarrassing stories, I was trying to relate to my wife,

the hand job heard around the world. That bit you had about the kid getting jerked off on the field trip. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I couldn't do it. This morning she was like, oh, who do you guys have on? And I was like, oh, Jay Larson. He has this bit, I think, about a lot. But the only line I can remember is when you ask somebody about it in the bit,

And then the guy's like, sure, the hand job hurt around the world. Yeah, that was a band trip. That was a good bit. Good, that was a bit, man. Concert band, not like I was in a band. No, no, no, no. No, hand job would have been less remarkable in that situation, I feel like. Yeah, that's low key for them.

Yeah, exactly. Okay, good. What? Cool band, like guns and roses? No, I was, I didn't say anything. You had beckoning eyes. No, well, I was just thinking about how, like, band kids fucked, right? Oh, okay.

Listen, my recommendation to anyone is if you want to get laid, get into band, choir, or drama. Drama? You're working on the set late at night on a Wednesday. They order food in. They're treated like they're at work. They all fuck around. You really wasn't getting it in like people thought was the football team.

Yeah, of course they weren't. Well, there were guys on the team. There were some dudes on my team. There were a couple. I wasn't, but there were guys. They were like doing what you think it was. A couple tent polls, no pun intended, who were like really holding up.

the sexual reputation of our entire program. Oh man, Antonio Lucero was like porkies over there. Tony! That guy was going crazy. I don't think... Girls from other schools. I don't think the combined offensive and defensive

lines were doing much more than maybe once or twice a semester. You know what I? We need to put numbers on it. Just talking about the trenches. That was the only anything resembling a trench. We were... Skateboarders and Sue Pauls were doing just fine.

Skateboarders, I feel like chicks would, like, go to watch you and shit. No? Barely. It wasn't cool yet. Yeah, you really, does it suck to you that you got in when it was still for losers? Yes. And then a year after I'm out of high school, everyone's like, dude, skateboarding rules.

Tony Hawks pro skater comes out. Remember Dogtown, the Z boys? I mean, maybe you were living in the wrong area. I was in the 70s. Yeah, that's what I'm saying. Yeah, I could have been born way earlier or slightly later. Do you think that had anything to do with your personality or hygiene? Hygiene I could give you, but he's got a great person.

I know. Come on. I was a dirty little dog. I'll tell you that. Although I'm taking baths. Still steady. I mean, I was taking baths. Truly, actually, I bet you weren't a dirty little dog.

I thought your hygiene was great. Then I would shower off the bath afterwards. You take baths? A lot. Dating back to when you should be, which is five, six years old, all the way until current day. Taking baths before school in high school. Who has the time?

I did. You make the time. You're a director. You understand? I know. I ought to be efficient. Move quick. That's a priority.

The top for Sean was baths, skateboarding. Yeah, I had to feel good about myself. Not even care it. See, baths now with my kids now are strictly reserved for like maybe like a late Sunday afternoon. Yeah. You know what I mean? How old are you guys? My son will be 12 in February and my daughter's 10.

Yeah. There's no room for baths. I have a one-year-old baths all the time. Four and a half a half a day. Yeah. The best is when you give the bath in the kitchen sink and you just in there. Love that bad. Oh, it's so cute.

Yeah. Yeah. Double up on some leftovers. Yeah. Yeah. Two work. Some in the microwave. Here you go, chicken.

I walked into my house the other day. Sean was taking a bath in my kitchen sick. Give myself a little horrors bath. Living the bath life over here. No, you were talking to. Dana was pissed. All I can fit are my two feet, but I'm still naked. Now, the way we determine the order of this draft is a rollicking game of rock, paper, scissors,

played between the three of you. We throw and shoot. Are you ready? Yeah. Here it goes. Rock, paper, scissors, shoot. David wins. an unnatural victory.

Odd person out wins. The odd man out. Why don't you give me that stat? I'm playing... You would have played a different? You didn't know that. You didn't know that. Maybe?

What? You don't believe in the subconscious? You want to have that conversation. I think Jay is right. Okay, let's run it back. Let's run it back. Now that you know that, let's run it back.

All right, here we go. Rock, paper, scissors, shoot. You and I took the same philosophy. It turned out of... Not exactly the same because they were different... He mixed it up. We were like, oh, watch this curveball.

he's like, If you get money, don't make no money. He even caught us both on the same bear trap on that one. I'll be honest though, in fantasy football drafts, having the number one pick,

I don't, I don't want it. It's sort of like a weird pressure. You might still get the number one pick, though. David's about to tell us what the order is. Oh, oh, that's true.

But in fantasy football, like then you end up with like, you're like, do I take McCaffrey? And then it's a year he gets hurt. I would much rather have someone at six, seven or eight and then you have to swing

coming back the other way. Come on. A hot corner. I'm going just to the couch. Well, me, Jay, Ian, Sean. I guess we just all understand what a serpentine draft is. I think they absolutely do. In case you didn't, it's like blowing your nose one nostril,

then this nostril, we didn't get everything, so you do this again and then this again. Gross. That's not how I would get in that. Nine and three days, and it was a tough one today. You pick fourth in the first round. David, with that in mind, what would the order of today's draft? I'm doing the couch.

David. David, Jay, Ian, Sean. Hot corner. Sean. I love it. That's the order. We're drafting items we would want from Seinfeld. And we're going to get to that first pick of David Borey's right after a short break from our sponsors.

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You know that was like a defining moment in music with the guy who came up with that. The dude who wrote that lick is like, is like a very specific form of music. I don't know. Pre everything being on the internet, I had a lie I would tell people that that was Boyd Brooks.

I made a guy up. I was like, you know the dude who did the Seinfeld Baseline, Boyd Brooks. And then I told people who also did Nightcourt. you've never told me this that's good that is really good so sick

you have a lie that people can't discredit now they can look it up and the best part about that lie is nobody would believe it but he backs it up with night court

you always need something so obscure like oh that's got to be true we did night court too you guys want to guess his name I have it in front of me you have the actual

Seinfeld Bitz guy Jason Jason Schmidt Boyd Brooks no Jonathan Wolf with two Fs oh yeah that's how they spell

for feeling freaky It's an L-O-C-type of situation What do you mean that's how they spell it? The wolves The wolves Some of W-O-L-F-E I've seen that I have seen that

Yeah That's Josh Wolf? How's Josh Wolf? John Wolf was straight up I sang like a wolf Like a wild Yeah okay Yeah yeah yeah yeah My turn?

That's right All right I got it first First thing that came to my head I got to take the bro Oh, you can take it. Number one. You mean the man's ear?

The man's ear? Okay, all right. Well, I mean, what would you have called it? The bro. The bro. You would have called it the bro? Yeah. Yeah.

I wrote down bro, but then when I was on the wiki, they said man's ear and I was like, oh, that's right. I think the bro is way better. I'm taking it because as much as it is Joe's, uh, Kramer's show, Jerry Stiller is the funniest guy to me. Absolutely. Every, every Kramer Frank interaction, them teaming up in. scheming. It's so fucking fucking. He just, his face, everything about him

murders me. I think Jerry Stiller is, it's top three funniest people to ever walk the earth. He's the greatest. Especially when in that scene, when they got the record play ago, remember like, dun, dun, dun, dun, and she walks in and he's

snapping the man here or bro behind him and she looks at him and he just goes, he owns it. He just owns like, yeah, I'm doing this. It's so funny, man. It's so good. And Frankie's just like, he just killed me, man.

Everything that guy said. I love, I love. We can't say too much because I don't want to give things away for someone else draft. We don't want to say other items. Right.

You know, there are some Jerry Stiller moments, dude. Man. And just like, I love to do him and Kramer scheming together. The best. Just like,

just two guys trying to get on, man. When they got together, they were just like, those are hustlers right there. Yeah. Not even great ones, but like, yeah, I just, man, killed me. First thing I thought of. First thing I thought of when we decided this.

Do you guys have a dad, friend's dad in your life that you scheme with or like, no? My dad is a bit of a schemer. Yeah, Ivan is for sure. My dad is not too far off from a Jerry Stiller time. I love it. Yeah. I have a friend who's always coming up on stuff. Is that what you mean?

Yeah. Like, what do you mean? He's the kind of guy who could get you Louis Vuitton by the yard. Okay, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. That type of stuff. My dad had a boy. You called him Indian Mike.

I woke up one time. Pakistani dude, right? We're on the beach, huh? We're on the beach. We're on the lake and I'm asleep. My dad's like, let's go fishing at the lake or whatever. And then I'm laying in a sleeping bag. He's just being a bad dad.

And I wake up to him and Mike getting blunted. And I'm like, what's up? And I hear them talking about. They're like, hey, we figured it out. We're going to steal my car and park it in Mike's garage and get the money for it. Yeah. And I'm like 11. Like, you guys are fucking morons.

That's the first place I'm going to look is your buddy Mike's garage The guy you steal cars with? Yeah, the guy you taught me how to paint curbs My dad was trying to get it He taught me how to paint curbs He'd go to small towns And he would just paint their address on the curb

Then he'd go around and say there was like this He'd be like, yeah, there's a softball game coming up He would dance around the words So they would think they were donating to this softball league or whatever And then he would just take the money He got kicked out of so many small towns I think there's a difference between

scheming and scamming. This sounds more like a scam. That's a scam. It does sound like a scam. My dad had me involved in a schmata throwback jersey business when I was in college. Yeah, where he and his friend had gotten a bunch of like counterfeit throwback jerseys. My dad's an attorney, by the way.

So he knew it was illegal. His friend was in importing and exporting, and he had come upon a bunch of like camera. Import or exporter? A real one. He's a real importer exporter. Come on, man. And it got his hands on a bunch of things on a bunch of

of like counterfeit throwback jerseys. I was on campus at the time and he's like, like, I know who's going to buy these. You know, the college kids are going to want these like throwback jerseys. That's what my dad sounds like. And he gave me a big box of them and was like, just walk around and like cold sell people. Did you? Not a one.

What was the kickback they wanted on it? They wanted like, I think it was going to be like, I don't remember. It was not great for me. Did you try to sell any or did you just like trying it? I tried once. I tried once. I walked up to a couple of guys. It was humiliating.

Did you have the box? I was wearing, I had the box of my trunk. I was wearing a Dion Sanders, and it was the only one of my size, but it also looked the most shmada. Like, it looked the most fake, because it was a Dion Sanders cowboy jersey, which is just like the numbers,

and the name Sanders on the back. Yeah. There's not flare. There's not a lion here. There's no star? There was no star. It was just the home whites, which is just, if you look,

it's just truly home whites. There's nothing, it's the helmet, you know? So, like, truly look like counterfeit. didn't sell a single one. Was it sewn on numbers? No. That's... Because if it was sewn on numbers, you could have moved that.

This one was pressed on for sure. Yeah, that's tough. That was... Yeah, that was always about it. Man, how much were you selling them for? College kids don't have any money? Didn't even get into that point. Hey, man, you're interested?

Nah, man. No. Where'd you go to school? Portland State University. Yeah, who wouldn't Portland State wants a Dion? I mean, Dion is legit. Everywhere. I mean, Dion is Universal.

Because I bought fake jerseys. I got a fake T-MAC Raptors jersey at the house right now. I got a fake Charles Barkley. Yeah, they got good ones. I didn't dabble in fake. You just stole them. Yeah, you're a thief. I stole real ones.

But yeah, my first pick, the bro. The man's here. I love it. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Jay, your first pick. My first pick is going to be, because it's also a financial investment. I am drafting the soup Nazi recipes. Ooh, damn, that's good.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I almost thought about taking the honest. because the recipes were inside the armoa but I just didn't want to get too greedy. I just want with the recipes. Yeah, get the recipes. Yeah. Get the, uh, the bis. Are you going to take the recipes away for me?

Were you still going to take the armor? I was entertaining the idea. Who doesn't need space? Who's the same? Who's the same? Now it's just an empty armoor because he's got the rest of it needs space. That's right. What are you doing with his armor?

We are thinking it. Those two are my favorite. It's the funny shit. Gay bullies. Yeah. Gay bully. Kramer's so shook. And Kramer's just like, all right.

Yeah. He doesn't know. what to do. It's also, I love that that's not his only run in with him. Right. It's the walk, the charity walk is another one,

right? Yeah. God, that's funny. I also love that Kramer would volunteer, be like, yeah, I'll watch it.

Yeah. He's going to sleep out on the sidewalk. To him, this is, that's the greatest thing about him is they, he was just so malleable they could make him do anything.

Yeah. Yeah. And he was friends with a Zub Nazi. Don't you remember? Yeah. He was like, ah, no one understands me like you,

Kramer. Yeah. A lot of really, a really great alliances. The best. Like when you really, he was like connected to so many people. So many. He had a rich life outside of the show.

And he could play both sides. Yeah. Great friends with Newman. Great friends with Newman. Great friends. Yeah. Great friends. Yeah.

The soup nods your recipes. They did make the soup sound good. Oh, my God. Oh, it seemed amazing. And the best is when Elaine goes up and she's like, bamp, bump, bump on the thing. What do I want? Yeah. And he's like staring at her.

And George is standing there, right? Like, what are you doing? He's just standing there like he's like waiting in like a breadline in Soviet Russia. Yeah. And he goes, one bisque and then scoots over. You know what's funny. At my age, I didn't know what bisque was when that came out. Pre-Bisk.

Didn't know what Bisk was. Interesting. Years later. Let me ask you guys this. Do you consider... It's a grown-up soup. It's a big-time grown-up soup. Lobster Biss though.

You ever had a lobster dish. He's crazy. That's a smooth jazz soup. That's like, that's like cocktail-a-s-smouth jazz soup. Lops or this tastes like you're supposed to drizzle it on something else. Sure. Dude, I was like you're not supposed to have a bowl of it. No, no, because you can have a heart attack if you have a whole bowl.

Yeah, it's crazy. A little taster passing around. It's a butter-based soup. Yeah. Do you consider stew a soup? I don't. Is it a stew? It's because it's chili a soup?

I don't think so. No. That's what I'm saying. This is nose across the board? Hard no. Hard no. Stews are very different. Wow.

Who's shitting your stew earlier? We're just having a friendly little conversation. I come from a stew culture. I come from a soup and stew culture. He's part of the Dinty Moore Dynasty. The Dinty Moore Dynasty is the Dinty Dynasty. That's so funny, dude. I think that stew is a subcategory of soup.

I think soup is this overarching category and that you stew, bisque, chowder, all of that stuff. I'm going to blow your mind. I think a stew came first. Right? And then the broth. And then people said, oh, we can do more with this. And then soup became a subculture.

And then stew. got kicked to the curb. They're like, get the fuck out of here. It's stew. Because my nana would make a stew. Yeah. And you know what her baller move was? That would come off so hot.

She put a big bowl for you, but she gave you a little bowl to portion into so it could cool quicker. Oh, wow. Oh, that is a good move. Pastini in there with some beef. Yeah. No, I love stew. Absolutely. Stu's also a very middle, lower class food.

I love stew. Yeah. I think that's hot stew. That stew came first and then they had to thin it out. I think there's something really interesting. And then soup came up and then people were like, oh shit, this is way better than stew. Yeah. Stu piece.

And then soup just like was more versatile. And then. Stu shot first. Rich people then were like, oh, we don't eat soup and they invented bisque. No, rich people were like, we don't do stew. It's like, it's like mayonnaise came first, right? But then what came in? Aoli.

Aoli. People needed it to be like, they had to fucking make a jump. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. To make it like feel more exclusive. And how many aole? out there. Tons. Too many. Relax on the aole. Relax on the aoli.

Aoli. Relax. Relax. You want to get a carrot in me. Put it in the stew. That'll work. Oh, a stewed carrot. It's great. I can handle that. Big beefy stew? I might make a big fucking beefy stew this weekend. No, you're not. You won't? I won't. I don't. You're like, you don't have the time. You don't think I will? No, I don't think so. You're going to fuck him. Set of a photo. You know how much soup I make? Oh, you make a lot of soup? I stay making soup. You're making a lot of soup? You're making it into pressure cooker? No? No? top big pot on top of the stove i won't do it i won't do a pressure cooker really feels like a fast track yeah i don't want to get once you got that automatic can open it's a lot easier for

to make your soup i don't do that hey hey hey got him i use my oh okay yeah like you're doing campbells yeah i'll fucking it wasn't as bad as you're making it to be it was a pretty good joke for a comedy podcast it was a fine joke but you just didn't get it and now it's lost yeah but i took it as an insult because now you're impugning no socks see now that was an insult no it was a question we're going back to the the hygiene. Well, we got... We got a... Now it's in...

He's from a boat culture. East Coast Mask guy. There's a boaty out there, right? Deflecting. It's boating? It's boating? It's funny what people think. You know what I mean? People have an idea of who they think you are. Yeah. I know.

Oh, choose high shorts? No. I mean, I love high shorts. Cape Cod. Cape Cod. He's like two seconds away from just quoting the departed. Did you see Unfall in the other night? They had Matt Damon and Ben Affleck and they named... single town in Massachusetts.

Did they really? And I literally just watched it until they got to stone them. I'm like, are they going to say stone them? Yeah. And they did them like, alright. That's fine. Atmustia has a song where they talk about like all the towns in the Midwest.

They threw Sue Falls in there. So it was pretty, like all the small towns around Minneapolis. I get excited. I love it. When they did that West Coast version of that. The West Side? Yeah, the West Side.

And they said Portland, Oregon. No, no. That was huge for us. TQ West Side. TQ West Side. Denver had a mile high of West Side. side, but it kind of pissed me off. Yeah.

No, it's too far. Too far. Don't do that. It's insulting. Don't make a, don't make a Watts song about Denver. Yeah, we don't need that. Give us our own shit. Yeah.

All right. All right. Are you wearing no socks or are they no show socks? Just in a hurry. I forgot to put them on. I got them. I got them. You have no socks?

I got them. I have a next pair of socks. Have you been wearing no socks this entire day? All day I have been. Wow. Man. That doesn't ruin your shoes? No.

great, good for you. It's just one afternoon. It's just one afternoon. I'm not doing it. I'm just sitting here. It's a hot afternoon. It's not going to wreck my shoes. Okay.

All right. Being funny and beautiful. Now I'm on the defensive. Yeah. Sorry. I apologize to everyone. Make your shitty pick. It is time for my shitty pick.

Okay. I'm excited. Let's go. I'm going to take the George Costanza erotic photograph. Yeah. Great. Yeah. Something.

All right. College walls. You are a lover boy. You are a lover boy. It's in a lot of, in a lot of, like you said, dorm rooms and stuff already. This is something you can actually buy, unlike the soup Nazi recipes or the mansier. Although maybe they do sell mansiers. You could probably get the soup Nazi recipes.

Somebody has to. Do you think they've put out like a cookbook of soup Nazi recipes? You don't think so? No. All right. He didn't have stew. They didn't once order stew from him. So maybe you're right.

Maybe it's not soup. I think he had a menagerie. Yeah. I think it was a lot. He had a biscuit and a chowder. There was probably a stew in there. Yeah. Yeah, I mean.

I think my favorite, one of my favorite things they did in Seinfeld that they did exactly with what you're talking about is when George goes to Kramer, Kramer's like looking at the camera. And George is like, so, Elaine, I heard you worked with Elaine. Elaine says good stuff. He goes, yeah, Elaine was a fun project. Yeah. They act as if they've never met, you know? Like, it's one of the greatest things. Is there a time when Kramer doesn't know Elaine's last name?

And she's like, it's Venice. Can you remember that? Yeah. You don't know my last name? Yes. The other thing about Seinfeld that is so great Is that like the the way the A, B and C storylines All would like all intertwine at the end

He's a genius at that That was the whole, it's the whole point It's like perfect television writing Where this where it's like the male fraud thing Where then they have to have the Costanza picture like up right Like as the proof of the male fraud Isn't that what happens in it? Yeah

Yeah It's just so great And it's so funny did the same thing did it on curb too Curb storylines tie up well they created I mean put it this way every TV show I've sold

it that's what I tried to do like that because I'm like oh that's the way it needs to go you know what I mean it's like they did a genius and we're talking about entourage they did the same thing I mean it wasn't comedy where it like came together but they all danced so perfectly together you were in warm waters and liking entourage

right now it's crazy comparing entourage to Seinfeld I don't think anyone's ever done that before and I'm here for it. Yeah. Let's do it. Tune in next week, guys, when we break that. Whoa. We've never done an entourage draft.

I don't think. Jay is the only one that, Jay or Harper, you're the only two that could do it, I think. David, when are you out of town next? Yeah. I don't, I've only seen it because of you guys. Before I hung out with you guys, I had never seen it. And then I started watching it with you guys and I was like, it's cool, I guess. And then pandemic hit and I watched all of it.

Yeah. Oh, okay. So we should do it. We should do, you should come back and we should do an entourage. I would love to do that. Isaac, you could watch it beforehand and get involved. Pass. Oh, all right.

God damn. That hurt. He's nice. The Costanza picture. Sean, time for your first pick, by the. The Festivist poll. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. For the rest of us. Just fun. It's so great. Just thinking about the dynamic. Who, I would love to have been in the Ryers room. Who came in that day with that idea? What if, back to your love and Jerry, I mean.

filler. Wasn't this based on a real thing? Didn't somebody's dad like invent their own holiday? Because so much of the writer's room. It is anecdotal from their lives. Yeah. Yeah, it's got to be. I mean, that has to be.

And then they just figured out a way to work in like festival, fest of us for the rest of us. But thinking about pinning your dad, I had a dad that thought he liked to scrap with like my dad, he would put on those early UFCs. And he'd like put me in an ankle lock real quick. Tank Abbott? Yes. Tank Abbott.

Kemo. Not chemo. What was the guy? Do you know that big fat guy? Kimo? Kimo sounds like a W.W.E. Yeah. You're going to get chemo.

Yeah. Like Dan Severin. You come back from body slating so hard, your hair falls out. Ultimately, you'll be better off for it, but it's going to suck while it's happening. You're going to barf a lot. Dan Severin Tankab and all that stuff. But yeah, he'd get real fighty. Festivus was conceived by author and editor Daniel O'Keefe, the father of television writer Dan O'Keefe,

and was celebrated by his family's early as 1966. That's amazing. That's awesome. Just made up a holiday to have it like in a dead zone, like in the early summer. I think he wanted a non-religious like Christmas festival basically. But just I wonder if they added the poll or did they come from the story. Oh, in the original O'Keefe tradition, the holiday would take place to celebrate the anniversary of his first date with his wife, Deborah. They were placed an anniversary with festival.

Yeah, with festivals. We let everybody get in on it. It's so amazing. Worked out for you, right? You're here. Yeah. It's, but just to have a pole, like instead of, is there a tree? Nobody leaves until you pin your father?

Yeah. Yeah. The airing of the grievances and everything? I love the in-airing of grievances. Yeah, I think that's a good idea. It's healthy. It's healthy. That's a healthy family dynamic.

Yes. I've long championed, and I think this is just a rip-off a festivist, is that there should be Thanksgiving and also complain a win, where on one day you give thanks, all the things. And then complain a wean, you can just sort of like get some complaints off

around your family. I mean, you're on something. Yeah. Are you complaining about your family to your family? Start with Hardy this year. I'll start with Hardy this year.

I'll start with our one year old. I don't know you been... Complaint a weed. I can complain about whatever I want. Yeah. I don't know you've been shitting everywhere. You haven't worn socks in five hours. He's always sticky.

Why is you so sticky? It's called blowing your nose. Yeah. All right. Look it up. Yeah, a festivist poll is great. That's a great idea. The Human Fund.

That's the Human Fund episode, right? What are we doing here? Oh, shit. I'm sorry. Excuse me. I'm sorry. I apologize. I'll double it back.

I'll double it back. I'm just, we ready for number two? Yeah. Puffy shirt. Oh, yeah. Yeah, give me the puppy shirt. I passed on it. I don't want to be a pirate.

Yeah. I don't want to be a pirate. I don't want to be a pirate. More for me. I don't even like the shirt. You know, it's a stupid shirt. they're just watching like it's a scare

her whole life school was she French or something she was a quiet talker yeah so French yeah so French yeah she would be like like

just a fun reveal yeah just a good old fashion fun reveal that was via Kramer again right he was dating the quiet talk yeah

he's always dating someone yeah because she asked Kramer to ask Jerry to wear it yeah and you feel you feel for Jerry when he's wearing it and you're like, ah, tough shake, brother.

I hate it when somebody you love gives you a bad shirt. Oh, dude. That shit sucks. I mean, what do we talk about complaining ween? I don't, I'm at the point now. It's just like, sorry. I'm just going to be like, no, don't get me clothes anymore. Hey, mom, stop shopping at Marshalls.

Okay? I'm a grown man. I don't need a triple XL Tommy Hill figure shirt. I just don't need it. But if you want to kick that down. Yeah. You get her my address. You are looking to get 100%.

We're not all out of that game. What I'm saying is my mom doesn't know my sizes. My mom still doesn't understand the time difference. Every time I talk to me, now what time is it out of? I'm like, Ma, look at the clock where it is with you, subtract three. That's it.

What are you doing out there? As if it's something unique to my household. You know what I mean? We will go. We get up in the morning and decide what time it is. We're driving around for the holidays. is my mom's in town. We just go by a building and she's like, what's that?

And I'm like, I don't fucking know, dude. It's a building. I don't know what every building is in the neighbor. I just don't. She acts like she's never seen a building. Then she's like, quit being so big city. That's seriously. Oh, hush.

You sound rude. You're from Sioux Falls. Shanties too. Shanties. Some huts. There's a coonsid huts. There's a hovel. There's a rich, dude.

Some guy just got a bungalow the other day. You got a bungalow on there? What's in the paper? Everyone knows about it? We don't have a paper. Some guy yells. We have a town screener. We have a town screener.

Sue Falls bungalow. Does your guys' moms, I mean, in my family, we all, there are things that if you said it, if I said something and you and my brother or sisters, be like, all right, Sue, because it's just like our mom, you know what I mean? And that's something. So whenever my brother comes to visit, anytime we pass Venice High School, I go, oh, you know, they shot Greece the movie over there. And he's like, you tell me every. time. And I'll, and, like, I'll do it where we pass it. And then we're coming back.

And I'll be like, oh, so right here, dude, grease. Shot it right there. That goes into, we talk about this all the time, but like social bits. Well, that's every time you drive past Hollywood High School with Sean. Skateboarding. Every time. Hollywood High. Look, Hollywood High.

What did I do? My mom is nice with it with the shirts. She actually nails it. Really? It's crazy. Yeah. That's tight. That's tight.

That's a bonus mom feature. It's huge. Yeah. It's huge. But I would, if she, to the point where if she doesn't, I will call it out. And I've done it with my wife as well. You're slipping. Hey, Sue, get a hold of your son's throat back up.

I'll just be like, I got to be honest. I probably won't wear this one. And she's fine with it because she nails it so often that she's like, and usually there's another shirt on the way and it's like home run. Wait, were you raised by a Sue too? I was raised by a Sue. Yeah, yeah. Raised by Sue.

It's our new podcast, guys. It only, boys named Sue. Boys name Sue. Sean could be on there too because he's from Sue Falls. My mom's name. Your mom's name Sue? Your mom is a very Korean name. Because it is a very Korean name.

Hun Su, and then she just took the Sue part. Yeah. Hell yeah. Hell yeah. See, no, see, why don't we ever talk about this appropriation? These Asians taking white names and just being like, oh, yeah. Boys, I think we found the breakout clip for the industry. What's the fuck out of him, man.

Just, no laughter, just Jay's saying that. Hey, go, can I get some control over the post? Here's what we don't talk about. Cut me out of it. I'll share it. The Larson cut of AFB. Billy Wall should be talking about crazy girls all day. Final cut.

Puffy shirt, yeah. Yeah, man, puppy shirt. Who here, I think in this room, Isaac, you're probably the closest to being able to pull off a puffy shirt. Oh, yeah, of course. What does it look like? Is it that... Google the Puffy shirt.

The famous, okay, hold on. Have you not seen Seinfeld? Well, the worst was he had those black jeans on, you know what I mean, with that little pointy belt, you know? He dressed like David Bowie in Labyrinth a little bit. He looked like a sword fighter. He looked like a sword fighter. He looked like, that's a shirt for somebody with big jugs.

You know what I mean? It's a big jug shirt. It's a big jug shirt. It's like a lead zapplin shirt or like a big jug shirt. Isaac, of the people in this room. Maybe. I would have to pair it with something else. You're telling me you got something to parent with this.

My man, what would you pair it with? It would have to be part of like a Dracula, like type of thing. You're doing like sexy Dracula? This can't be a costume. This has to be you're wearing it in the world. You had to wear that. You're going out. Where's your favorite place to go besides here listening to us, be funny?

I mean, this is pretty low on the list, to be honest. Like my favorite bar, Edendale. Okay, so you had to go to Eden, though. People got to think you're serious with that shirt. What do you pair with it? Holy. A book? Then you got to, like, really, like, cloak.

No, like jeans. You have to be like, oh, yeah, no, this is just my thing. Yeah, you can't let us know that you're dressed up. What about big matador pants? Like, high weight, you know what I mean? You know what I'm talking about when I say that? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like Vega and Street Fighter?

Kind of. Now he's going to wear a breasted suit coat jacket. Yeah, yeah. Half your face is a mask. A double-breasted, yeah, double-breasted suit jacket, maybe. No, you can't cover up the sleeves. That's a fucking, nah. Anyway, good talk.

Anyway, good talk. That's great. Back to the podcast. I just think it's an interesting draft choice because you're never going to wear it. You know what I mean? I was thinking about this stuff more as like, what do I want for memorabilia in my crib? That's how I was trying to think of What do I want?

I have angles of all my picks. No, I'm going to jack off to the Costanza picture. It's utilitarian. Yeah, yeah. This for me is you walk into my office and I'm like, look at what I got from Seinfeld. Right there. All real. Fusili Jerry is my next bet.

Oh, that's great. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm working on one for you too, George. Yeah. I'm using Rigotone. What did he say? Yeah. I think that's what he says.

You goes, I'm working for you, too, George. Yeah. I'm using rigatone. he sits on it right doesn't it go up no it goes up I thought it goes up his butt yeah it goes up George's dad it goes up Frank Costanza's ass

because he's getting in a fight he's getting in a tussle with who's he getting in a tussle with Elaine maybe somebody yeah and he gets falls on the couch because they're like not it's like a wide armed thing that's not that you want a piece of me thing is it no that's when George is dating the

oh okay because remember they Remember the next cutaway is they're at the doctor's office, and Jerry goes, you had to use fusili pasta. Yeah. And then they're out. Corsesru pasta. Yeah. Fusili Jerry. I mean, that would be amazing just to have on the shelf in your house.

We're talking about memorabilia. It'd be great to have. I got the, somebody got me the Lego, Seinfeld set once. Oh, yeah. And there's a tiny little fusili Jerry that comes with it. No way. You don't put that piece together. It just comes.

It just comes. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, we're a big of leg house It's really fun that one That was like got it like for Hanukkah Sat there for like winter break Didn't have anything to do We might have watched Seinfeld

And I just like put it together Oh yeah, that's baller Yeah, it was great That's baller We have the home alone house We put together watching home alone Oh that's awesome Yeah, it's the best

It's pretty fun I don't have enough room in my house To become a Lego guy Yeah But like Well now you got the kid We'll break it I mean Rose broke that one

Rose broke yeah Bronger Bronger's daughter broke They came over a party And she just took it and was like, yack, and they like fell on the floor. Two or three at the time.

That's completely unacceptable. Seriously, tell that to Kara. Get the fuck out of here. You tell Kara making that. You look at Karen in the face and tell her that. Is anyone parenting this child? Who thinks this is appropriate behavior?

Neither of them really had a crossword to say about it. But part of me was really... Wronger was. Because Rose was cool all day. And then right before we left, she did that. And he's like, God. Damn it. Oh, so sorry, Ronnie.

Under his breath. He was so bummed because they made it all day. Yeah. But it was, honestly, and I told them this at the time, and it's true, like, again, my house is pretty small. So it was like, that takes up a significant amount of room. I got it. It's a big set. So I was, like, kind of relieved.

Yeah. And now it's like in a bag somewhere. You don't know. You don't have to. One day to put together again. One thing happens to a Lego, you toss the whole shit out. Yeah. Yeah.

I mean, I got it still. It'll be, he'll play with it. Like when. Yeah. You got to go for the rebuild. Yeah. Go for the rebuild. Yeah, I've done the rebuild before.

Really? Yeah. Oh, man. I mean, we were a big Lego house. I built a Lego table. Was it like a... To do Lego zone? Yes.

I built a eight foot by four foot Lego table. God damn. What? My kids each had a side. I put drawers in. They had the whole city out. We wired it. So there were lanterns.

I got street lights. Come on. Yeah. What? You're like the movie dead. You got a pick on that? Yeah, I got to pick somewhere. And now my son has in his room, I chopped it down because we moved.

But he has a whole shelf. We have everything. We have the original Lego castle, the yellow one for the night. For a 19708. You're the only one I know that does this shit. Like, didn't you build yourself an outdoor shower just because you're like, I want an outdoor shower? Yeah, baby. Nobody does it.

Everyone talks about it. He's got to. Well, I mean, it's just fun. Do you live by the beach? Yeah. Okay, there you go. But I mean, when I built the outdoor shower, we were two and a half miles from it. It's hot.

It's 78 degrees here. Yeah. At my house, I'm at the beach now. Yeah. It's probably like 62. I wouldn't shower out there today, but I'd shower here. Yeah, right, right. I think anyone.

We've been inside all day, but it's warm out there. Anyone should have, every house should have an outdoor shower. Yeah, I love that. I had one in Hawaii one time and changed everything. Were you nude in it or were you washing off theater? Yeah, I was butt naked. Butt naked. It was Zach Tusconi's mom's house.

Does he, has he done a home show there? Zach wasn't there. Was that there? I was. Sorry, Zach. Sorry, Zach. He was in Omaha. Dentist's house.

I was with Zach. Scottie one time and he played my brother had tried to get me into the avalanches is back to the greece thing i'll go as quick as i can sure sure and my brother tried to get me into the avalanches you know the band yeah and i was like oh whatever and then i was with zach in portland and we're driving around and he kept playing the avalanche so i'm like oh this is tight and i go who is the avalanche's yeah i text for my brother i'm like dude you know who you would love and he's like who i'm like the avalanches he goes i told you about i'm like i'm going to send you son and i was saying you man My buddy, Zach, put me on to some heat right here.

They're great. Did they do that Frankie Sinatra agreement? Yeah. Yeah. That song is awesome. That one's good. Still a Jared. Jay, time of you said.

I know. There's so many things I could take. You know what I'm... Man, there's like five I want to go for right now. I don't think you guys are going to pick any of these. I don't know. You might be... So I'm going to save this one because I know no one's getting it.

I'm going to save... That one, if someone got it, I'm okay with. I'm going to say I want the title of golf ball that went in the whale. Damn. Yeah. Yeah. One of the greatest speeches

in the history of that show monologues is when he goes, when he's talking about that whole thing and the best thing is when Jerry tells George she ran into the girl, right? Yeah.

And he goes, oh my God, what did you go? What did you tell her I do? He goes, I told her a marine biologist? What did you tell her architect? You know what I was going to be an architect? Jerry? What am I going to talk about now?

And then you cut to him in the house and goes, plankton. You know. He's just in it, dude, just lying, lying, lying. And then when they're on the beach, and then there's anyone here a marine biologist?

And you're like, no way. Because he's telling the story, right? Like at the very end and he pulls it out. At the end. Yeah. It monks. Yes, because also one of the greatest scenes ever is when Kramer comes in, he goes, he goes, who wants to have some fun?

Yeah. And Jerry goes, I want to have some fun. George, like, I want to have something. He goes, I just saying you want him something? You're really? goes, I really want to have some fun. George's like, I'm just saying I want to have so fun. He goes, I have 600 titleists in the trunk of my car. And so, like, they just literally give every single thing you're going to need. Yeah.

And they're all funny to get to the very last thing where you holds it up. And then Kramer goes, what is that, a title list? Yeah. And he's like, yeah, and he goes, oh, whole in one, huh? Like tag on top of a tag, on top of a tag? Man, it's so crazy. They have a callback. He goes, and I was, I lay it on top of the giant fish.

And he goes, whatever. Whatever. Whatever. Whatever. Whatever. Whatever. Whatever. Oh, man, it's good. I can't wait to go home and watch it. Yeah, I'm going to watch it tonight. That is such a great, great episode. And you're a golf man. Yeah, I'm a golf guy. Yeah, yeah. And I collect golf balls. So, like, I have my grandfather.

He died when I was five, but, like, I kept his golf balls, like these super old golf balls. And then I directed a commercial with Tiger Woods, so I have a Tiger Woods golf ball. And then I directed a commercial with Rory McElroy, so I have an autographed Roy McElroy. Oh my God. And then my favorite golf ball was like a two-tone ping golf ball that my son found. So now, like, I have golf ball collections in each of their rooms. Like, each of my daughter and son have, there's just golf balls around my house. Just, like, significant, like, kind of golf balls.

So, like, the two-tones in your son's room kind of thing. Yeah, but I don't have any, like, display things. You know what I mean? Like, they're just, like, my daughter has them, like, on her desk. And she's, like, adamant. Like, she doesn't say, I don't want my golf balls, but you'll see, like, she'll play some places. You know what I mean? Do they play, too?

I've taken them out. They both have clubs. We just haven't been out lately. Yeah, I used to go out with my dad when I was a kid, loved it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's so much fun. It's like a good sport for a little kid. It's a great sport.

Yeah. And I would like, I booked the last tea time on Sundays at a par three. So you can't, you're not even worried about the guy. No one behind us. And then I don't care if they finish. Yeah. Sun comes down. I go, go jump in the sand traps and they have flashlights and we run around the course until we leave.

And I'm like, you want to make it a place that they want to be. Yeah. This is true. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

It's great like dad tips. Yeah. Yeah. I'm telling you. This is the episode The Sea was angry that day, my friends, right? Of course.

Like an old man trying to return soup at a deli. And they all look at you, like what the hell does that mean? That's like the other great thing. They would take the time to give you that joke. Yeah.

And you had to be listening and paying attention. Like, you just feel like they don't do that anymore. Yeah. You want anything to drink? No, good with your water.

All right. Good with your whiskey and your water bowl. Any hole in once? holes in one? No, never. Anyone here? No. No.

Not even close. The green. I mean, that to me, I would have to be. Yeah. That shit's crazy. Right, son. Yeah. That's a great pick.

David, time for your second and your third picks. Pick number two, I'm taking the Moops' Tribal Pursuit card. Moops. With the boy in the bubble. Yeah. And when George and the boy in the bubble are playing and it's a misprint and then he freaks out and chokes George. Yeah.

Because he's like, I'm sorry, the correct answer is the moops. Wait, he gets in that kid's face? Yeah, yeah, yeah. So I don't remember that episode. I don't either. It's supposed to be the mumps? Is that what it's? Yeah, it's the Moors.

Oh, okay. The moors is what it is. And he's like, and he like, the boy in the bubble starts freaking out. And when Jerry comes in, he's like choking him, right? Yeah. Like through the bubble arm, like through the special arms through the thing, yeah. Oh, that's right. Because he had the arms that could come out.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. The correct answer is the moops. And then he gets, like, sick and then they're, like, wheeling them out at the very end. It's based on a real-life incident that occurred to one of the Seinfeld writers. So dark. Yeah. Dark was so much, like, they found an entry point into, like, dark humor that's super light. Because they are horrible people.

That's the funniest. Oh, totally. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Just a bunch of bad guys.

And they're just so likable. Nobody stands for anything. No. No. Nobody has anybody's back. They're all just kind of self-interested cowards. Yeah. That's a shame.

Yeah. Oh, that's a shame. They sort of like delight in each other's demise, yeah. So good. But yeah, moops. And then third. I've got, so there's a little backstory on what happened? Well, apparently it was something that happened to one of the Seinfeld riders while playing Jeopardy the board game.

Oh, really? The ninth edition that there was a misprint on it. And then, thank you, my friend. In November 10th, 1999, a computer virus named Bubble Boy was discovered, apparently named after this episode. It was the first malware of its kind Having been able to activate itself I mean they're naming computer viruses Offer things from I mean come on man

They call it the moops virus Yeah that's how influential true cultural touchstone Is it like a computer virus? Yeah How do you yeah Look at COVID dude Viruses are still gonna keep coming You think a computer did that

No but I'm saying like There are viruses that will continue to happen You can't serious I don't really think you thought a computer did that I just need you to know that I'm lost saying that now. I don't know where we're at.

He's saying that now. The moops. And your third pick? I think third pick I'm going to take, oh, man. John Voight's pencil. That's dumb. And he has to compare it to the bite on Kramer's arm. It's the dentist, John Voigt.

He's just got a shitty LaBaron. Yeah. It was a LaBron, right? Yeah. I had a Chrysillaborne converter. My grandma had a Chrysillaborne convertible. My grandma had one too, silver. Yeah.

I love that because it's like barely a convertible. John Foote's not driving a band. Like my friend in high school had a seabring convertible and we were like, that doesn't even. Mostly windows. Yeah. It was like the later version of that. It's a grandma car. Well, the other great thing is that's that's a Tim Waltley's house.

Yeah. You know, who's, you know. The dentist. Tim Watley, the dentist. Who became Breaking Bad, you know. Brian Cranston. He's so funny on that show. He's so funny on that show.

He's so funny. He's so good. I mean, you look at Malcolm in the middle, too. He's hilarious. He's just a hilarious. He's just a hilarious guy. Not very funny in breaking bed, but what do you do? And that's a testament to how many funny people they had just like going through the doors.

Like, kind of like separate cast on. So many funny people. Funny people and beautiful women for George or for Jerry. Yeah. That shit used to kill me where I'm like, there's no way. There's no world. Well, no. It's so funny.

No, it's won an episode almost. He's got a 30. It is one episode. He has a 31 inch, uh, sorry to keep saying picks. 31 inch waist. Yeah, and he's very clean. He gargles multiple times a day. You know what I mean?

Like, is it... Elaine who says that? Like, you know what he's doing it? It's gargling. That's so funny. Wait a minute. There was something in that... What was yours again?

John Void's pencil. John Void's pencils. Oh, yeah. One of the greatest... You know, like, they'll have, like, clips from Seinfeld outtakes. Yeah, yeah. One of the greatest ones ever is Wotley

when Jerry's dating that girl who looks good in some light and worse than the other at the dinner is. and she comes up and say, Jerry, our table's ready. And he turns to Cranston and he's just like, and Jerry just keeps dying and every take, Cranston does it a different way.

And Jerry can't do it. He can't handle it. Cranston wasn't a celebrity. He was just a guy who did have a good recurring. You know, day play. Oh my God. Right, right, exactly. Like the fucking, like the Cajonis to go on there and just like do that a different way every time.

Just keep ripping it and just cracking up the star over and over. Me and Sam, Talent, used to watch all the time is the outtakes of when Kramer's smoking. Oh, ha. He used to feeling good. Oh, yeah, man. All the time. All the time. That's not when he slams the beer.

Yes, that's my cigarette. That might be my favorite part of the whole show ever. He does it. He peed perfectly where you're like, that guy does that sometimes. Yeah. Like Michael Richards does that. Well, it's physical comedy at the end of the day.

That is like, you know, great. We're stumbling in, man. He's just feeling good all the time. Yeah, that shit's so funny. Do you know the low-key greatest, Brian Cranston moment in Seinfeld history. I don't think it's going to take anyone's pick, so I'm going to give it. Do you remember the time when it's like he converted to Judaism?

For the jokes. Right. And Jerry's going in to see him at the thing. So you remember when he takes a hit off the mask? Do you know this story? Yeah, everyone knows the story. Oh, okay. I don't know the story.

I just know what you're talking about. So he's on set, like, getting familiar with his situation, space work as an actor, getting ready. And there's a gaffer fixing the light. And he goes, hey, you know, it would be funny is if you took a hit of that before you gave it to Jerry. No. So he does the take.

He does that. They have to cancel the take because Larry David is laughing so a lot. And he's like, keep it. Go again. Go again. And it's like one of my favorite stories because like anytime I'm directing,

I'll say to like my first idea. I'm like, hey, if you ever have something, you know what I mean? Like, I'm not going to always take it. And I'll say it to certain people.

Because if you're open to like stuff like that, sometimes you might get like the greatest joke. Some gaffer giving you like, the greatest joke. Oh, that's amazing. Yeah, so fun. Hell yeah. John Void's pencil. So funny. It's so funny. Another one of those episodes

that's just so many things is going. And that is John Voigt. He's like, John Voitzka. What a funny actor to have it been. So random. It's not fucking Tom Cruise. It's like kind of honestly the guy where we were like, maybe he did drive a life there. It's believable. Yeah. Yeah. It's so believable.

John's Boy. What? It's like runaway train. Midnight Cowboy. Midnight Cowboy. Yeah. I mean like, I don't know. We didn't know about it. Anaconda Jolie back then. It was just pure void.

And recently he was on What's that show, Will I have Shriver? You know, where he plays like the hitman. He's his dad. Oh, boss? No, not Bob. Ray Donovan. Ray Donovan?

Yeah. They're still banking out, cranking out. No, but I mean when the show was on. Yeah. I heard I got to watch. Wasn't he in heat too? Wasn't he the guy that they went to and got like IDs and shit? Yeah.

Barcity Blues. Jay, your third pick. That's right. He wasn't. Man, there is so. I'm telling you, there's so many things in here I could draft. I'm going to go with, I'm going to get the Seinfeld's condo in Del Boca Vista. Oh, that's great.

Oh, yeah. I like that. I like that. That's one of the greatest, back to your boy. Come on. When he leaves that voicemail, you can't keep us out of Del Boca Vista. We're moving in, lock, stock, and barrel. We're going to meet the pool.

We're going to meet the clubhouse. We're going to be all over that shuffleboard court. All over that. Shuffleboard court. The voicemails was the greatest thing ever. Yeah. Like when they thought George died. Jerry, it's Frank Costander.

George's dead. Steinbren is here. George's dead. Call me back. And then remember what he starts going off on Steinbrenner about? Trade in Jay Buna. What the hell do you trade Jay Buna for? Yeah.

He had 39 home runs last year. Rock it for an arm. But my favorite thing about Del Bocavista is they, took this little tiny place and then they gave remember Jack Klompas? Yes. The great. Jerry. Jerry. I see you got a Hey, Morty. I see he got a Cadillac.

Oh my God. Oh, the neighbor. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That guy. I wanted to make a t-shirt line called Imaginary Friends. Yeah. And I would take characters from television and I wanted to get Jack Clompis landscaping and have his face. Like, I just feel like he ran a landscaping business down in Florida. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, Jack Kloppas landscape. Like the business. Yeah. Like the business.

Yeah, like the business shirt. That's fucking phenomenal. I would wear Jack Laughas landscaping shirt. I mean, do you think you could sell them around Portland State? I'll do my best. I'll do my best. The condo and Del Bocavist is great. And we're going to be right back with more picks.

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And here is a special limited time deal for our listeners right now. Get up to 60% off your Babbel subscription at babble.com forward slash all fantasy. Get up to 60% off at babble.com forward slash all fantasy spelled b-ab-b-B-E-L.com forward slash all fantasy rules and restrictions may apply. And we're back. Welcome back to All Fantasy. Everything already in progress. It's time for my third pick. There are so many.

there's a lot we got it at the end do things that aren't picked we gotta throw some stuff out right I'm gonna rip them off I'm gonna take the Merv Griffin set that's the only thing so far that's been said that I had on my list

great the Merv Griffin show set the Kramer oh the set yeah of course yeah the whole set digs out of the garbage and then fills his apartment with and then slowly just starts hosting the Merv Griffin show

yeah he was going crazy in that apartment man yeah oh my God he was going crazy in there can you stick around I wish we could have seen more of his apartment. Man, I wanted to see the levels. Yeah, but that was part of the mystique, though.

I know. When you got in, you're like, damn. Remember was it? Garbage disposal? Come on, man. You're same. Oh, my, I had that pick. Did you actually?

Yeah. Oh, God, damn. I made this whole meal mall baby. But then they, at first they were all shocked, but then they were going in to, like, vent their shit, right? Yeah, they would go sit there. It was just Kramer and Newman for a minute, and Kramer's like, man, we got to do something to revamp. like the program. And then he set up, like, he brought in Jerry's girlfriend and had them like get in this fight.

And Crame was like, oh. Oh. So funny. Was it, am I wrong? Was it George that came in and didn't know he was going to be a guest and he's just all excited? Graeme was like, well, all right then and took his coat up. Yeah. That was such a fun episode.

The Merv Griffin show. Yeah. What an amazing idea, dude. Oh, it's just so great. And it's like so obscure yet just understandable enough. And then you're like, you. it was so based in absurdity but you believed all of it

you're like yeah Kramer would totally do something like this Yep No the world had like really defined rules Which I appreciate The other thing What else happens in this episode Is so insane

What? Like the fact that there's like I almost don't want to say Because I don't want to say picks But like the other The Merv Griffin Show episode Is also the Sidelor episode Side Saddler

The side of the tic-tack's Yeah was that Rob Schneider Yeah Yeah Where she gives him tick-tacks So she can be So you can hear him coming down. And it's also the, Jerry is dating a guy, a woman who...

Man hands? No, the toys. So they like make her fall in a tree. Oh, that's right. So they can play with the toys. That's right. That's right. That's right.

That's right. More wine? More wine? Yeah. Turkey wine. More everything. Well, that's a different one. Yeah, I know.

That's what they're in first class. Yeah, that's right. But yeah, three crazy stories. Let me, can I guess what season this was? Yeah. It's either five, six or seven. That was the heat. That ain't guessing.

It's actually not. What is it? Season 9. Oh, man. Really? Does that post? Larry David? A lot of my picks were five, six, or seven.

I thought when I was like going through, like it was like so, like I was surprised how good those seasons are. Yeah. Yeah. You know what I think it was too, especially at least with Kramer, is Kramer started busting through the door because Michael Richard started doing that. And then 7, eight, nine, they just wrote it like that. Yeah. Kramer buzzed.

Like he always had to do. They wrote the character that he just created. It's a little bit of the, the, uh, Bart Simpson. in, what's that episode where he, what is the thing he says? Eat my shorts? No, where he like, like burst onto the side show,

Bob show. And like, it's really funny. Oh, yeah. I didn't do it. What is it? No. I know, this is where I let you guys down

and let you know, I've never really watched The Simpsons. That's all right. Yeah, I'm not, I'm not on it. Anyway, my kids watch it. What does he say?

What does he say? And he becomes the that. No, what is it? Yeah. He becomes the that kid. And there's like, it is I didn't do it. Because they have a, there's like a,

There's like a rap song too, right? Yeah. I didn't do it. Yeah, it's, I didn't do it. Are they making fun of the idea that people get, are you saying Bart became this thing on their show too? Or are they writing a character to do the thing that we're talking about? They wrote it.

They gave a plot line to Bart that where like he bursts on to like the crust of the clown show accidentally. Uh-huh. But then like I didn't do it and gets a huge laugh, but then it's diminishing returns every time he doesn't. Yeah, yeah. No, it was make fun. Did I do that? I think it was a failed. I think so too.

Yeah. No, they crushed that. So, what did I take? Murf Griffin said. Merv Griffin said. That's my pick. Sean, time for me. All right, Sean.

I want to put Jerry's bad check up on my wall. Oh. I have it on there. Because that's, that would be tight just to have on your wall. Hey, Kramer. It's the. At the bodega. Yeah.

Because it's the Little Jerry Seinfeld episode. Yeah, he goes, Little Jerry. Hey, Kramer. Nice rooster. Little, what's his name? This is Little Jerry Seinfeld. Does he bounce checks too? The greatest.

Because they have the checkup. It's just such a... So when I was... When I was 20... I don't know, 21 or something, I went into a liquor store and I tried to write a check

and they were like, you're code for. I go, what's that mean? I go, what's that mean? He's like, I don't know, but I can't take it. And so that hit with me real hard because I'm like,

damn. So then I just couldn't go back there and write checks because the one time... You remember the machine they used to run it through? Yeah. Remember that?

Yeah. And so they just wouldn't my checks anymore after that. So that resonates. Are people still doing checks? I just brought this up the other day. I don't see it. No, I had to explain to my kids the other day. I go, so guys, people used to write checks because I was explaining the movie Catch Me If You Can. Because like they've heard of it and they wanted to know what it is. So I started breaking it down. My son, like we love Heist movies, you know, we watched the Italian job like a month ago. Oh, yeah. So I'm telling him about, you don't know what a check is, that movie's really not going to make sense. Yeah. Yeah. So I was breaking it all down to

I'm like, yeah, people just need to write checks. And I'm like, you know, you could just write a check for anything, you know, which I did. You could write a check over for anything. That's, that's, that's I used to float. I would float my, I'd go to the bar and I'd be like, I'm going to write this check. Oh yeah. Just lose it for a few days. Like if this goes in before Friday, we're all going to have a bad time. You know who used to take every check you wrote was pizza guys. Shout out to Blackjack pizza, Denver, Colorado. Yeah. You could write, you knew it was bad, but you could buy as much pizza as you wanted. I bet you could still write a check at Hy-Vee in Sioux Falls. I bet it happened. I used to write checks. My last, the house

we rented in Denver, we Landlord still get checks. I think like grocery stores still take checks because you still see like old blue hair ladies in there. You can still write a check there. But are people still writing them for over? That's what I, when I used to work like at Target and shit like. Oh, it gets or the gas station. Like

yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, to get cash back. That's how you know you're in a rough spot if someone's like $100 dollar limit or whatever. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like you go get up, I remember doing that, getting a pack of gum being like how much can I write it over? Yeah, people used to do that. When I worked at Lof joke people would write it over get like a soda or some shit. I'd be floating

them because you couldn't go to the ATM because the money wasn't there yet. So before they got the technology to scan the check to see if you had the money in the account, you could write it for over even if you didn't have the money. Yeah, it was a promise and bank on them taking a few days to cash it. Interesting. It was very interesting. Big roll of the dice.

By the way, can we just acknowledge how great that episode was? They're talking about cockfighting. Remember Jerry's like, hey, little Jerry Seinfeld ran from my apartment in Newman's and like two minutes and 14 seconds. Is that good? He's like, I don't know. Such a great...

That was a great episode. It was one of my faves. Yeah. That's a great pick. That's your third round pick right there? Mm-hmm. What's for? I want the junior mint.

Oh. That got lost in the body. I think that's fun. It's a fun little conversation piece going on my mantle. You would take that before you'd take the juji fruits? Yeah. I remember when Elaine ate them on the way to see... Was that Jake Jarmel?

who was sick. It wasn't Jake Charmel. It was one of her boyfriends. That was sick in the hospital and she did that. Yeah, I like the junior man because it's subtle. It's a tiny, tiny little guy.

And it's, they took a super unique experience that none of us have ever done. No. Never gonna be a natural. They made it like relatable where they're watching, they got to observe the surgery. Yeah. And he brought junior men.

You can see how they got to that joke to that are like, there's a theater? It's a theater. It's a theater. So what? Do they sell like junior minutes outside? Like, everyone probably laughed and they were like,

it's a very stand-up. line of thinking. It is. And the best was like the way someone he offers him over it. He's like watching. He's like hands out like these junior men's. I get to work with,

I do patter for the Oscars. So just like presenter patter. You know when they go up and it's like, you know, two famous people. Yeah. And one of the people who works on it with me is Carol Leifer. Who was like this, she wrote on Seinfeld.

She's like done a million things. He's open for him and they dated, right? Yeah. That's that. And she like, so you can get her. And like there's so much downtime in this room that you can, like I'll like suddenly get her talking about like riding on Seinfeld and everything. It's the greatest.

I bet. Well, I could say they're all day and listen to that. It's amazing. She's just got such great story. And she's like this like, she's like this old, you know,

older lady with this great like New York accent. It's just exactly what you want. It's so great. Doctors be doing that. They be leaving shit in there. It happens more than you think. Keep going. It does.

They have left scissors. Every now and again. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Some gauze, you know, leave some stuff in there. Maybe an eyelash. Booger? Socks? That's why I don't have socks.

I left him in a patient earlier. Bobby socks? Yeah. What was your pick before that? The check. The bad check and the junior men. Back to back. Time for my fourth pick.

I'm going to take the amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat. God damn. Yeah. I was thinking about that or the hat. Yeah. The hat. I guess the whole outfit. I'm going to take the whole...

Because whose hat is it? Because he gets it separate. Because the wigmaster, that's where he gets the coat. Yeah, he gets the jacket from the wigmaster. And then the hat comes blowing down the street. Yeah. And he puts it on. And then he starts in that truck.

What does somebody yell out to him? When he's what? Hey, Kramer! Hey, Kramer! Yeah, and he says something back that's like very jive. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Can I say that? Yeah.

It is, because he's like playing like a jive 1970s. Yeah. Oh, Kramer. Yeah, that's a great. You got that right. Yeah, you got that. That's a great. That's a great thing.

I really thought I could get that. The wigmaster character's great too. I mean, like, it's just the whole episode is so what is it? I'm trying to find. Oh, so the episode was inspired by the time writer Spike Farisdyn's living girlfriend had her wigmaster friend as a house guest and ended up staying for two days and it made his life living hell. Oh, yeah, because this is also the car.

They can't get this car out of the parking lot. Yeah, because some guys turn in you. Turning tricks in the car. using it for prostitutes. God, it is funny. They're just talking about prostitution, jacking off, cockfighting. It's insane.

Hold on, I'm trying to find out what he yells. This is the one, and the tech to color suits where Kramer's dressed like a pimp, right? Yeah. Yes. Because then he goes to the car and then the police come and they're like,

hey man, you know, there's no like, because then there's a woman involved. You know, they do what they do and they bring everything timed out perfectly where it turns into, like, you know. What is Technicolor? Joseph in the Technicolor dream quote, the play. It's a musical.

Okay. Yeah. Yeah. Bring me my colored coat. Anything? Nothing. Well, then I could do nothing. I mean, I love the way you sounded when you were singing it.

You have a great voice. My many colored coat. I've never seen it. No. I heard it. I've never seen it either. When I worked on the late show, we did an Andrew Lloyd-Leodweber. We did an Andrew Lloyd-Weber.

We did an Andrew Lloyd-Weber crosswere. for musical. Okay. That's the only reason I know it. I used to do an Andrew Lloyd-Weber joke. What was it? Can you believe that? I used to talk about how I was in a band and a girls would be like,

oh my God, you're in a band. I'm like, no, I'm in the band. Like, there's a difference between the and ah. And they're like, oh, my God, what kind of music do play? I'm like, oh, we mainly do cover tunes, like talking about being in the band. She's like, oh, my God, like Pearl Jam. I love Pearl Jam. I love Pearl Jam.

I love Pearl, yeah. We do like Andrew Lloyd Webba. On Broadway, shit like that. Oh my God All right Am I up? Yeah There's so many things

This is the fourth round You got two Yeah, Yeah, two left And then we'll rattle off The other one Okay I'm gonna take

The book Astonishing Tales of the Sea Oh yeah I had another book I don't know what you're talking about When George is George is trying to First of all

This is also when Kramer's sick Right And he has the same Affliction as that dog So he starts taking dog medicine But George is going to move into this apartment. There's an apartment that's for rent and he gets it.

And then the tenant association decide they're going to give it to this other guy because he was a survivor of the Andrea Doria, which was a ship that sank. And they're like, you know, they're just sitting there one day and then they can't remember what it is. And Kramer goes, the Andrew Doria sucked 12, sunk 12 miles off the coast in the Ntucket. And he goes, it's in my book, astonishing Tales of the Sea. He goes, how many people died? And he goes, 43 people died. And he goes, George goes, 43?

How many people died in normal cruise? 30? And then he goes and confronts the guy, remember? It's the greatest thing ever. He goes, ah, Mr. Sonso. He goes, yeah, he goes, ah, Mr. Sonso. He goes, yeah. He goes, ahoy.

He says, ahoy. Now, I played this clip for my son and daughter when he was nine. Yeah. And he got that joke. Like, he understood that a hooy was a rip on the idea that this guy was on a boat. Yeah. And he goes, I understand. You were on the end of door.

He goes, yeah, he goes, yeah, we had to abandon ship. And he goes, it was terrifying. It was terrifying. It was terrifying is the buffet. Yeah. And the guy's like, I don't think I like you very much. And he goes, the Stockholm may not have sunk you, but I will. And Jerry convinces him.

He goes, listen, he goes, if they're so concerned with, like, all the bad things that happen, this guy, why don't you tell him all the astonishing tales of Costanza? Yeah. So this guy's recounting the story, and George's in the corner just knocking on the wall. No respect for the guy. And then they did that time lapse. He goes, well, he goes, the envelopes were poisoning. And then they're cutting all these little things.

Oh, my God. So good. The envelopes were poisoned. I was naked alone. Oh, yeah, naked. This is like in New York when I thought. Anyway. Can I take something from an episode that's already been talking about?

Of course. I mean, I don't know. You guys run this. Can I? I bet I know. I want to guess. I think you probably know. I was nervous when you took it.

I was nervous. Yeah, I was nervous when you took it. Oh, all right. Yeah. The ass man. Yes. You got it. The license plate?

I got it on here. I love it. Come on. When he's charging it down. Hey, ass man. You know it. That's where he goes, you got that right. You got that right.

How about when he's at that big girl at the door? He goes, hey, guys, this is, uh, yeah, hey, this is Tracy. Yeah. And she turns and walks away and he just stands at her, like, you guys, unbelievable. So good, man. It's so funny. Yeah. The fucking ass with her.

You got that right. That's when, yeah, Fusilio. Jerry, they get there later. He goes, Jerry, look. And the guy's boat says ass man. He goes, hey, wait a me. He goes, he didn't recently have your plates mixed up with the DMV. And he goes, yeah, he goes, so you're the ass man. I'm the ass man. Yeah, I love that. Yeah, that's so funny. Asman plates. Yeah, there it is. Had it. It's so great.

Yeah, I had Asman plates on there. All right. Last one. Unfortunately, the, uh, the Kramer line isn't, and I found the script, but whatever he yells when he first puts like as long as That was the It's all improvised Yeah Anyway Yes yes

Time for your fifth pick Sorry All right My last one You've never seen it Because they don't show it to you in the episode I want the Christmas card

With Elaine's nipple Oh Love it Yeah Hey Elaine How come everybody Got a Christmas card for me Jerry got a Christmas

God Kramer got a Christmas cat I thought we were friends You want a Christmas card Oh god Yeah Flashes them on TV Great Great

Great, man, great. And then she just, like, pushes his heads away. His hair's all frazzled and George is just, like, shot, like, couldn't believe. Yeah, but, like, kind of like... He walks away on that, like, on that floating tip where he's like, whoa. And it's just like, it's, like, such a great plot point where it's, like, just heightened up a little bit. Because you feel like that happened to somebody for sure. Yeah.

You know what I mean? Oh, that their nipples, like, in their Christmas car? Yeah, absolutely. I bet it did. I bet, like, that did happen to somebody. She goes, people around the, going around the office call me nip. Yeah. By the way, that's a callback, you know, to the, you know, that's how we got to him shooting your first pick.

Because the initial, the first time he shot, he shot that Christmas card for a lane. Yes, he did with a nipple out. Yeah. That's right. Kramer took it. Okay. Yeah. That was a fun project.

That was a fun project. Joy to work with. I love that. But yeah, that's my closing pick. Jay, your final pick. Man, all right. I'm going to go deep cut then. I'm going to take Centrax.

Wait, what is that? I don't know what that is. Sentrax is the stock that George and Jerry got into. And Jerry pulled out early because it was tanking so hard. And George stayed in it and he made enough money. Remember, he won all that money. And he buys everyone, he buys everyone dinner at the coffee shop. And he's just sitting there.

It's come on, eat, eat. And Jerry's like, so how much did you clear all in? He goes, ah, eight grand. He goes, it's a Hyundai. Yeah. It's a Hyundai. Oh, that's so funny. I don't remember that.

I don't either. It's first season. Okay. First season. Yeah, yeah, yeah. The Seinfeld Chronicles. Yeah, the Seinfeld Chronicles. Do you know the first episode?

I know the first episode. I mean, the pilot. Yeah. When he's wearing the purple shirt and they're at the coffee shop. It's a red sweatpants shop. It's a different set. Different set. And they're like, you want, she pours like coffee for George and goes, is that decaf?

And he goes, she goes, yes, it's decaf. And he goes, well, it doesn't have the old. orange indicated. She goes, regular right, decaf left. It's very complicated. Yeah. It's very complicated. I thought the restaurant. I thought that was the pilot. Am I crazy? The Chinese restaurant? The Chinese food restaurant? I don't think so. Oh, I always thought that was the pilot episode. I don't know why. I think so.

But we could look into it. I'm looking it up right now. Okay. I think it's, that's the one because George's, uh, Jerry's having a woman come stay in town. They've just been friends and she's going to stay there and it's like, should I? I don't know. Yeah. She's getting out of bed. And Kramer comes in and he goes, what do you do? And he goes, why are you even offering it to him? That's Craver just coming in with sage wisdom. Yeah. What are you doing?

He comes in with two pieces of bread. He goes, you got any meat? That's right. I do remember that. And he goes, and he VHS recorded the Mets game. And Kramer comes and goes, well, the Mets blew it tonight. And Jerry's like, no, I taped it. The whole thing when he answers the phone, right?

He's like, I taped the Mets game and don't tell me what I have a movie. Yes, yes, yes. Man, stage was games. I forgot about games, man. Sage wisdom. Kramer is my favorite Kramer. Yeah. Can't you two kids say you're crazy about each other?

With like a Jerry and Elena fighting. Yeah. Yeah. Or when the woman's like walking around naked across the street and goes, Jerry, when we were boys, we'd walk around. Like, why can't they need a naked woman out there? Now the reason you were thrown all the way? We'll let you do it, Jerry.

Please. We were boys. Jay's right. That is the pilot. The Chinese restaurant is in season two. I'm. But the Chinese restaurant and the parking lot episode? are just like genius.

Parking lot's so good. And if we want to tie it into entourage, it would be like when they went to do mushrooms in Joshua Tree, which is one of my least favorite episodes. Yeah. Same, but one location. One location. I do like an Eric Roberts, though.

I do. I enjoy it. You want to pound the stone? You want to pound the stone? Come on, gold. I mean, you just hold his wrist up. Come on, gold. He's like, very effeminate, but like rock hard.

My final pick is the marble rye. Yeah. So great. It's great. It's great. He steals it, runs down the street. She just rips a marble rye away from a little way. Which, by the way, the whole reason

Jerry's dad didn't get president of Del Boca Vista was because that lady remembered the story about Jerry and she's like, you! Yeah, the marble ride! How deep of a callback can you be? Amazing.

Sean, your final pick. Get it to me, you old hat. Give me a whole hat. When you really see the window into the soul, you're like, you're a prick, dude. Yeah. That's you. That's who you are. Where were they bringing it to?

It was a dinner? He had to bring it to a dinner? I forget where they didn't know if they needed to bring something. Yeah. No, that's, you're thinking the, you're going with the chocolate bobca, the lesser bopka. Right. The marble rye, George needed somewhere.

Remember because he threw the fishing hook out and Jerry had to, like, he'd bring it up to him or something like that? Because he stole it. Did, like, George take it from the place thing and they wouldn't notice it? I can't remember. I'll say this about bobka. I prefer cinnamon bobca. I've never had either, but I would tell you right now,

I want a cinnamon bobca straight up. I got one for Christmas this year, my first popcorn. From your man who sent Isaac that chocolate. Triplett? Yeah, triplet. Goldbelly from somewhere? I think so. Bobca and Ruggala, are those the little ones?

Ruggla, yeah, yeah. Little cinnamon ones. Pretty good. Is that a Jewish? No. So he's going Bobca and Ruggla non-Juda, from goyam to goyam? I don't like the way you say it. Gentile and Gentile and Gentile.

I'm going very uncomfortable. Are they not allowed to send as a person? Absolutely. I've given a goy some pastrami. I bet you have. A goil? Yeah, a goil. A goil.

A goil. I've got a goil. Adam gave me a VHS a baby boy. The guys knows how to give a gift. He gave me a VHS a booty call. That's the guy knows what's up. I love someone sending a VH. Oh man, I love foodie call.

And your final pick? George's wallet. Oh, okay. That's great. You got a hard candy in there. It just pulls out and you're like, doc. I remember a point where mine looked like that. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That was in there.

That was good because that was like a wake-up call for a lot of people. Yeah. It was genius. Yeah. Is that a back problem? It was so absurd. I think about it every time my wallet's a little too big and it's like on an airplane's flight, you know what I'm like, why's it back?

I'll just put it in the front pocket. Gift cards. You take it out gift cards. Does your wallet get too big now, though? As a grown man, a man, a father. I would say once a year. Once a year, your shit gets too bad. I'm good with it now.

I keep my shit slim. I don't even keep too much shit in there. Me too. I have a money clip with cards and cash. Yeah, I got a wallet, but it's just my basic cards. I don't carry it. A few receipts. What do you need to have in there?

Nothing really? I got my driver's license, two credit cards. I got a Costco card. I'm used to having it. I probably don't need to have that all me all the time. I can probably have that in a drawer. I'm used to it being in my pocket. I don't trust it being up here.

and I don't trust something too tiny being in my back. Like, feeling the wallet is something I'm used to. I got some rugel in there? I can't go from pocket. Mine's in my back, but mine's not huge. Mine's trim, look it. Yeah. Yeah, that's built for speed.

Oh, my man's walking around with Andos. Jesus, dear. Okay, Honda on the outside. I mean, we're getting to put on the inside. I see. It's the same, babe. It's the same, baby. Isaac, do you have a pick?

Are you a Seinfeld guy? No, not really. I've watched. I don't know, three or four of the seasons. Okay, nice. But I'm going to go with something that became a bit of an internet meme in the recent years. George's massive Gortex.

Yeah, the Puffy Joe. Yeah, Puffy Jack. What is that? That shit is hard. What is it? It's yellow and black? Yeah, it's black and like orangey, burnt orangey. He knocks over the wine in the store.

That was the chocolate babco. They're out there. They're getting the wine. George is like, why are we getting it? Why did we get, though, they had to break 100. Remember, he had to break 100? George was constantly getting fits off. He looked good.

George was cool. Remember when he got that cool car? What was the fucking car? The red car? Oh, yeah. He was the bad boy. It was his dad's car. Oh, yeah, yeah.

It was like an SS, right? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. That was when Jerry Stiller and Elaine going to fight at the corner. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And he was seeing that girl. Do you want to go? He had that Broadway-bound shirt, like the, yeah, he was cool, man. Costanza was getting it off.

Anyway, great pick. Can we list a couple things real quick? Let's do it. I was going to say Henigans. Remember Henning's whiskey when he's drinking it? And then Kramer gets all banged up because that's also the red dot sweater, which I think is one of the greatest episodes of all time. Yeah.

Where when Elaine goes, hey, George, you give me that sweater because I had a red dot on? He's like, what? Elaine, here I go. In the spirit of Christmas and go out. And this is the response. And she's like, well, Jerry said you did. What? You told them?

And then he goes, I never told you, and she tricked you. And then he immediately goes, Elaine, I had 105 temperatures later day. I was seeing red dots all over. It's just fucking genius. To be that quick on your feet. And just to be that big of a liar that they're going to lie no matter what. That's like his greatest quality. He's the greatest.

He'll dig it as deep as it needs to go. He doesn't give a fuck. Fake job, whatever, man. Whatever, dude. Independent George, remember that episode? Yeah. That's when he goes. He goes, that's who I am.

fun George, liar George and Jerry's like, I love that George me too! That was one of the greatest I had the cigar store Indian Yeah The hat, the furry hat Yeah

Hold on, can we not blow over the cigar When he goes, hey Jerry! Out the taxi, oh, oh, yeah, right. And he's with the woman. That lady's so pissed at him Because what was the first joke He got off where she got mad?

He gets a He was like an Indian giver or something like that Yeah, that's right. You can't do that. You can be... And she goes, where'd you get those tickets? He goes, I got them from a guy who resells ticket.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. The pretzels that make you thirsty? Oh, yeah. These pretzels are making me thirsty. Yeah. What? The mutton. Oh, my God, the mutton, yeah.

The stick on the mutton in the munt. I love my mutton. Yeah. I got... This one wouldn't have made that much sense, but I got the traffic of cancer. Oh, yeah. Because that whole episode, they thought it was Capricorn, but he actually did. Damn it.

The greatest. guest star of all time. What's his face? Bookman. Bookman. Oh my God. Bookman went crazy. Who's that actor? I don't even, I don't know what his name is.

Maybe that's your thing, Seinfeld, huh? Draw little peepies and wee-wee. Just like, what? The guy was so intense. Drawing little peepies and wee-weees. You're good time guys. Yeah. Jerry goes, your name is Bookman?

Philip Baker Hall. Yeah. Yeah. Went crazy that episode. I also had the garbage disposal in the bathtub drain. I had JFK. Golf Clubs. Yeah.

That was one of my, I think one of the, you know, I think that was written by someone sent that episode in, like a kid. Really?

Yeah, the JFK, the golf clubs. That was when they were also going to Michigan to recycle and they got the golf, they got the mail truck, you know, to solve that thing. Yeah, yeah.

The 10 cents. Babe Ruth uniform. Yeah. Mr. Marbles and the executive. Remember the executive? The greatest line. The raincoat. Yeah.

Yeah. The best thing is when he's explaining to Kramer of how he came up with that. He goes, I came home. And he goes, I stepped on one of Jerry. toys. He was like, took off my belt

to hit him with it. He was like, caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror. Just the idea of a strong man is one that's going to whip his kid with the belt. That's how I feel. It's so dark and just amazing. Man, this was fun.

Oh, oh, Torea, I got a recap. I got a recap. David, you went first you took the bro, the Moops Tribal Pursuit card, John Void's pencil, the ass man license plate, the Christmas card with Elaine's nipple. Jay you went second. You took the soup-Nazi recipes, the golf ball from the Wales blowhole, the condos in Del Boca Vista, the astonishing tales of the Seabook and the Centrack stock.

I went third. I took the George Costanza erotic picture, the fusili Jerry, the Merv Griffin show set, the technical dream coat, and the marble rye. Sean, you went last, he took the fest of his pole, the puffy shirt, Jerry's bad check, the junior man, and George's wallet. That's all good. We want to hear yours. Hit us up at All Fantasy Podcast at gmail.com.

Shout to everyone on the A-F-E Patreon, where you can get live. episodes, bonus content, mailbag episodes, auction drafts, all of that stuff. And Isaacs, much like George Costanza's, tasteful nudes. Tasteful nudes. Same underwear.

Same underwear. Same set. Same pose. Shout to everyone on the AFE subreddit. Shout out to our wonderful, wonderful producer, who just produced nine episodes in three days. Yeah, you went crazy. Sure did.

Isaac Lately, who went crazy on it. You guys went crazier than me. You guys were actually talking. You hear Jay Minigua is like You drink in white clothes 18 hours I'm having to come

I'm having a drink I'm done with Maybe 19 hours Maybe 19 Now I got to go home And edit the podcast That's going up tomorrow He's the best in the business

folks I got to go home and not talk to my wife for a little bit I'm not talking to nobody Yeah I know you mean Yeah yeah yeah Isaac Lee Shout out to St. Sue Carmel

Shout to Frank Gio Shout to Sid the dude Shout to Hodja Beats I'm more important than all of that Tune it again next week Tune it again next week Serenity now to another break

a new episode of all fantasy everything. Shaglackety. That was a hate gum podcast.