All Fantasy Everything - Romantic Comedy Movies (w/ Miel Bredouw, Sean Jordan, & David Gborie)

Episode Date: April 30, 2020

Here it is! The long awaited Rom Coms draft! Ian finally jumped on board the rom com train JUST before it left the station. The quarantine works in mysterious ways. One fun thing about recording remotely is that we can have guests no matter where they are located. This week we are thrilled to welcome Miel Bredouw to The Legion Of Zoom! Now sit back, relax, get ready for some hot takes, and some even hotter debates! Much love from the GVG! Episode Guest:Miel Bredouw @miel IG: @mielmonster Podcast: Punch Up The JamSupport the show!Join the All Fantasy Everything Patreon for exclusive mailbag and movie watch-a-long episodes. Check it all out at www.patreon.com/AllFantasy.Rate All Fantasy Everything 5-stars on Apple Podcasts.Decide the winner on the All Fantasy Everything Twitter poll @AllFantasyPodMerch!T-Shirts! Sweaters! Stickers! Mugs! Deck yourself out in some goods at www.teepublic.com/user/allfantasyeverythingFollow the Good Vibes Gang on social media:Ian Karmel @IanKarmel IG: @IanKarmelSean Jordan @SeanSJordan IG: @SeancougarmelonJordanDavid Gborie @Thegissilent IG: @Coolguyjokes87Show Email: [e-mail] Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

This is a HeadGum Podcast. Welcome to another brand new episode of All Fantasy Everything. The podcast that's been burning a lot of incense lately. Yeah, you look like you're in the Two Princes video. Mm-hmm. Pheromones. Marijuana. The street drug known as marijuana.

Mm-hmm. Oh. I've been doing Orange Crush lately. That's the drug I've been doing. The soda? That could be an actual drug. Yeah, it could be. Orange Kush. Sean, how old are you again? 37? 38? 38. I feel like a 38

year old man drinking Orange Crush has got to be a crime in a lot of states. Thank you for calling me a 38 year old man. A lot of people say boy. What else? Everybody. People who don't know me. Do a lot of people say that? You're calling me a 38-year-old man. A lot of people say boy. What else? Everybody. People who don't know me. Do a lot of people say that? You're a 38-year-old boy, they say. You're a wet 38-year-old.

That's borderline disrespectful. Sean's a sweet boy. Sean has been drinking Orange Crush and skateboarding. So you've been a bit of a boy. A top boy. Reverting. Sean lost his virginity and then went home and took a bath i don't know what you call that oh that's a that's a fact about sean that every time i'm reminded of it i get the

same chills down my entire asshole i can't explain it it feels really bad it feels really bad oh yeah the culo chills yeah i know about the culo. It's like it turns inside out, like you sat on something. You're like, oh. The Kulo. You hear what she says? She says your wind's knocking her poop button. It turns your mustard tunnel inside out. Oh, God.

This is the top of the episode. We have to stop. This is the beginning of the episode. I did this. I'm sorry. We can't see Marissa's face, but it's bummed. They knew what this was. That is right.

That is right. This is an upsetting way. She's wearing a bolo tie, her jacket has fringe on it and we're here talking about mustard tunnels? For God's sake? Listen, I think they're related. I think I shouldn't have come in so hot. I fucked this up immediately. I'm sorry. No, I think they're related. I think I shouldn't have come in so hot. I fucked this up

immediately. I'm sorry. No, I have a sweatshirt on. You can see when I dab. Oh, nice. Oh, God. He dabbed. The video is a little bit too far away, but I also have eyeliner on. I'm doing too much. I'm sorry. You gotta get up, man. You look fantastic. Hell yeah. I combed my hair for

this. I, like, for real took a comb through it, which I don't do. So I'm excited. It's really fun. I'm gonna my hair for this. I like for real took a comb through it, which I know I don't do. So I'm excited. It's really fun. I'm going to screenshot this so that the folks see that we're doing. You're not screenshotting it. You're taking a picture with your phone. The folks see that Sean is certainly making a hostage video like in this Saudi Arabia.

Where are you, Sean? He's in the depth of a Kosovo basement. Tell your dad to call the University of South Dakota and eliminate my debt now do you think that hostages make their own terms please wait I'm the hostage you're the hostage Sean yes University of South Dakota eliminate

Sean Jordan's debt please alright I'll make the video but on one condition I have one term i'd like to add the list thank you i will kill me i swear to god it's a it's a modest amount that i could have paid off 15 years ago i chose poorly and i did not there it is miel i missed you this is fun i miss you guys so much this is extremely fun for. You've been gone for such a long time. It's been what we haven't seen you in like a year. How's New York?

I left L.A. in July, but I had been leaving pretty periodically since about February. So it's been about a year that I've really been in L.A. Yeah, I haven't actually got to catch up. Has New York been treating you OK? I see your Instagram stories of you prancing around. New York. Yeah, New haven't actually got to catch up. Has New York been treating you okay? I see your Instagram stories of you prancing around. New York? Yeah, New York is great this time of pandemic. Now's the time for that.

I chose correctly. Up until a month ago, you were bouncing around like a romantic comedy, so it was fun to watch. I'm most excited for your home improvements. I'm excited too too and this week is art week in the tent so we're putting up all of the art I've been procrastinating. It's going to be just a quick GBBO ref. I don't know if you guys

are GBBO fans. Great British Bake Off? Great British Bake Off. It's cake week in the tent. That's how I have to view the home improvement projects to keep it interesting. Otherwise it's too monotonous. Are we doing okay? I'm thriving.'m thriving too I'm actually I'm having a blast I think by the way just circling back Sean having a blast feels a little insensitive I think okay I'm doing okay well I haven't drank I've been skating every day I exercise and I eat at the normal times it's crazy for. All of that. That was so many flexes in one sentence.

I'm honestly personally offended. My leg is cramping. Eating at normal times? You really had to go in, huh? Jesus Christ. Listen, it's tough for me. I eat dinner at like 7. No, it's not. You're fine.

That's why I said him. He's also with his wife-to-be. No, it's not. You're fine. That's why I said him. He's also with his wife-to-be. Yeah, wait, it's a wedding now. It's supposed to be. We're still keeping it August 15th, supposedly. But we'll hopefully. Oh, interesting. Interesting.

I didn't miss that invite. That's weird. I hope. I hope. Yucca, yucca, yucca, yucca. And it's not far from the island either, Sean. So it's like there's no excuse. It's right by the island.

I don't get it anymore. She didn't get invited to the wedding. She didn't get invited to your wedding. Oh, nobody got invited yet. Of course you're going to be invited. Knock it off. Are you going to wear a polo tie? Sorry, that was a nonverbal response.

Are you kidding? Of course I'd wear a full suit for you, Sean. She's going to wear a polo tie. Are you going to wear socks is the real question. Me and Ian are trying to figure it out. Yeah, we're trying to figure that out. No, no, no, no, no, no. Summer wedding, no socks. Never socks. That's what I was thinking too. Do I have to wear socks is the real question. Me and Ian are trying to figure that out. No, no, no, no, no, no. Summer wedding, no socks.

Never socks. That's what I was thinking too. Do I have to wear socks? Do I have to wear them? Yes. No, absolutely not. You got to wear mules, slip-ons. What's a mule?

A slip-on? Heelys. I want you to heely down the aisle, Sean. I don't do that. I don't like. I'm going to kickflip down the aisle. Kickflip over birthday cake. Here, you want to know something I'm looking forward to when this all gets over?

I was going to say this. I do. I do. I for one do as well. Going suit shopping I could go either way going suit shopping with these two and uh probably Adam I'd say maybe even Spliff uh in Portland I'm gonna Sean I can't take your niceness right now it's I'm too sensitive I'm too vulnerable I need you to be a little bit ruder no I will not but that was rude that was rude. That was rude. That was rude. Shit.

You brought it out of him. I'm sorry. Even though Marissa's not usually here when we record, for some reason the fact that her screen is off makes me feel like... It feels like a rejection. It feels like we're waiting for the teacher to come back or something like that. I'm sorry. It just feels weird to have a camera on me while I'm working.

No, no, no. Keep it off. Keep it off. It's just a fun thing I a camera on me while I'm like working. No, no, no. Keep it off. Keep it off. It's just a fun thing I noticed. I make a lot of fun observations. Do you mind actually, if I just grab a knife for the rest of this recording, I think I would feel a lot better. Please.

Dog. Yeah. Great. Not two of you have knives. I don't know. I think I took my knife away here because you guys were giving me shit. I don't know. I'm going to keep giving you shit.

I'll give Mielle shit too. Man, I don't have that thing on me. That's the knife you've been... Mielle just pulled out like a two foot knife and that's what she's been using. Oh, that's quite the knife. Thank you. That's one of those... That's a fillet knife.

I believe it's a bread knife, but it is longer than my face. Let me see the end of it. It's rounded the way it should be. Oh, that is a bread knife. I thought it went like... I thought it sharked in. Look at your knife.

Wow, Knives Club. You guys are... We're starting an international gang right now. Yeah, we're starting an international gang right now. Yeah, we're starting an international gang right now. I'm already in a gang. You know, I can't just be hopping gangs. I'm already in one. You know, we should write a movie and we call it Knives In.

Knives In. Yeah. I heard you can't pull out that bread knife. Like, if you pull out that bread knife, you can't put it away until it is tasted pumpernickel. Is that true? Yeah. That is true true or some type of a rye variety also they don't sell it together but when you buy a knife of this stature you have to buy the sheath you must they don't sell it together wouldn't it be funny if verizon wireless was spelled v-e-r-y-e z-o-i-z-o-n like it was a bread like it was a bread conglomerate that got into the cell phone game? Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Like accidentally. I'm on board. I'm on board. Cutting board. Hey! Night jokes. Thanks. Man, you better wash your ass with that.

Oh! Damn. Pulled it out. I had to hit him. I had to hit him real quick. Straight from the depths of four episodes. Neil, just in case you don't know and for listeners who haven't found this out yet, Sean is rebranding

as a wash your ass comedian. Man, you better wash your ass. Okay. Yeah. I know. I think that's great. I think that's great. I think it's a trajectory

that makes sense for you, Sean. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. I drop it in sometimes. It's better to be a catchphrase. Sometimes I say it at the store to people who don't know me.

Not now because I'm quarantined. Mix up a batch phrase. I think it would be nice if it was a little more specific because sometimes like the, depending on the nature of the mess that your ass is acquired, it, you know,

you need to wash it in different ways. Like, is it a paper wipe? Is it a wet wipe? Is it a shower? Is it a bidet? Like there's so many, I mean,

there's only one way to wash. You better wash your ass. There's a lot of ways to wipe your ass. You can wipe. I think there's more than one way to wash. You were talking about ways to wipe. You were talking about ways to wipe. No, I think there's more than one way to wash an ass. You were talking about ways to wipe. You were talking about ways to wipe. No, I think there's more than one way to wash an ass.

Nope. Wash? Sponge. Sponge? Soap? Sponge. Luffa. Scrubber.

Hand. Pumice. You ever wash your ass with pumice? Pumice? I don't even know what you're talking about. We were speaking English a second ago. You're out here washing your ass with a pumice stone? I'm just saying there's a lot of ways to wash an ass. I guess if you want a new layer of skin on your ass washing your ass with a pumice stone? I'm just saying there's a lot of ways to wash an ass.

I guess if you want a new layer of skin on your ass, you should use a pumice stone. I'll tell you about it. You better wash your ass with all that. You better exfoliate your ass. Yeah. Anyway, it's that kind of wash cast. Sean S. Jordan on Twitter. Sean Cougar Melon Jordan

on the gram. Hey, bud. Sean saying clown posse at the gathering down in the basement. How are you doing? I'm good, man. I'm just chilling, drinking orange crush. I'm over here crushing orange drink. Yeah. Been skateboarding,

trying to not get on my queen's nerves. Here's something. And I know I knew what I was doing and I did it anyways. So we're making chili last night and uh she has me she has me chop up an onion euphemism euphemism euphemism no after my wedding day it'll be a whole different thing but right now it still just means making chili so we're making chili and uh i put an onion in there and she comes upstairs i go what would that even be a nut putting an that a euphemism? What would that even be, a nut? Putting a nut in there?

That's dropping your nuts in? Yeah. No, that's the dog in the bathtub. I don't, okay. Dropping your nuts in is, that is a crazy term. You're the one asking if it's a euphemism. I'm just trying to figure out what you're saying. Dropping your nuts in?

Listen, you suggested it. I just, yes, I did. New York City is. Well, David always saying it, dropping your nuts in? Listen, you suggested it. I just, yes, I did you. New York City is. Well, David always suggests it, though. To be fair, David's always bringing that up. New York City has changed you. You left. I have a knife, David.

I need to remind you of a big knife. You're also dropping nuts in. I don't know what you are. Anyway, what did you do with your onion that made her so mad? So we put it in the chili, and I was like, do we need an onion in there? She goes, no, it just adds flavor. And I was like, you know, I don't like onions. And I just said it's like such a dick.

And I was like, what are you doing? There can be an onion in there. It's fine. Have an onion. I apologize. You don't even like a cooked onion. I think it's a mental thing. I think I know it's in there.

So I'm like, there's onions in here and I boohoo about it. Oh, bruv, it's mental. It's mental. It's definitely mental, bruv. So, Sean, you're drinking soda, you're skateboarding. Yeah. You know, what a 38-year-old does. Doing 38-year-old shit. Hanging out with an iMac. There you go.

That's about it. In a basement. David Borey, CoolGuysJokes77 on Instagram, TheGeniusIsland on Twitter. Uh-hmm. David Borey, CoolGuysYoke77 on Instagram, TheGianSilen on Twitter. Uh-huh. What's the new nickname again? Tay Biggs. Oh, GaragePHenchman.

Tay Biggs. GaragePHenson. GaragePHenchman. That's right. Tay Biggs. Woo, that's good. Great work, everybody. I think we can go.

I think that's it. Is that it? Yeah, I think we hit it. Let's go. Any more than that, it's like, what are we putting food on their plate? They're not hungry anymore. No, we're getting greedy. What have I been doing?

Gosh, guys. Knives. Books. Trying to stay away from the internet. Okay. And then I tried to get into video games. Can't do it, y'all. Really?

Yeah. I don't know. What was your entree? What was your entree? The Last of Us. Oh, that's too real for right now. That's way too real for right now. I also have God of War.

What about some lighthearted ones? David, Jesus. What about Tony Hawk or something? Holy buckets. I have Sonic versus- Also, I don't mean to be rude, but can you call it gosh of war? Like as long as I'm on the podcast anyway, like if you wouldn't mind. We just got a petition to turn it into gosh of war.

If you're going to sell it at Walmart. City of Gosh. It's got to be called Gosh of War. I come in here with my fucking kids. My gosh darn kids on Sundays. My fucking kids. I need you to call it Gosh of War. God damn it.

Burls. Come in here with my fucking kids. I like it when people do that. Like where they like drop their voice and then don't really say it. Here with my fucking kids. Hey, listen, mister. I don't give a shit. I don't give a shit what you think.

My buddy used to say fargan or whatever. He would just substitute words, and I was like, hey, man, I don't think God is mad about the word fuck. I think it's the vibe that you're throwing out when you're saying. It's fucking tent. If you have fucking tent, you might as well say that shit. I hate to be a stickler, but could you say,

I don't think gosh cares. What if like. Sorry, I know we're on here to have fun. You guys are my friends. I really like you, but like. Even if it's like, even if it's like gosh in a good light, I have to say like glory to gosh in the highest.

Yeah. All right. Yeah. All right. Yeah. All right. Gosh, damn it. Miel is joining us in the Temple of Zoom. Oh, really? Miel is here in the Temple of Zoom.

Prado is back. Yo. What's up, baby? I'm back and I'm ready to fuck shit up. Sorry, sorry, sorry. I'm ready to gosh it. Gosh up. Uh-huh. I don't know how to not swear. I'm ready to gosh it. Gosh up. I don't know how to not swear.

I'm sorry. You don't give a good gosh, darn. Honestly, the fucks and the shits don't bother me that much, but I swear to gosh, if anybody sticks her name in vain, I am going to frigging lose it. I swear to goulash, if any of you little demons try to slip that G-O-D in there, I'm going to have a C-O-N-I-P-I-T-I-C-O-N.

I don't know how to spell conniption. Sorry about that. You look like the first radio DJ to play rock and roll in Wyoming. You know, it's funny you bring that up because the real bummer about the timing of all this for me is that I finally realized what I want to do with my life right as this hit. Like I started quarantining March 11th. March 10th, I figured out what I want to do with my life right as this hit. Like I started quarantining March 11th. March 10th, I figured out what I want to do with my life. Witches? Story of a girl.

Cry to river and drown the whole world. What is it? No, I think he said witches, but I appreciate that nine days ref. It is, I want to be a vegan rodeo clown. Bad. I want to be an ethical rodeo clown in a big way, which means I can't.

You get like chased around by like cowboys on four wheelers or what? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. You want to let them hate crime you? I don't understand what you're saying. I want to be a fun distraction from some gruesome thing that doesn't involve animal cruelty,

but I still want to get to be the comic relief. We're comedians. We are a distraction from a gruesome thing. Yeah. It's a different thing. It's a different thing. Like you want to get to be the comic relief we're comedians we are a distraction from a gruesome thing yeah it's a different thing yeah everything like you want to open up at the flea circus what are you talking about i want to i want to go to like you know okay when you like you know what it is if you're trying to take like pictures okay this is more specifically you're trying to take some nice little pickies maybe you hired a photographer you're trying to pimp out that instagram with your like boyfriend and you're wearing inverted outfits of the same color scheme you know and you can't quite get the expression right like a baby at sears i want to be the person who not the photographer

but is in charge of making you smile for that photo that's me okay i want to be behind the camera not the photographer again nothing to do with the photos i just want to be behind the camera going look like you have a surprise give me a little wink camera going, look like you have a surprise. Give me a little wink. Turn to me like you have a secret, but then also not communicating that with words, mostly with my body and a lasso. That's the idea. Listen, if you can hold it in your head, you can hold it in your hand, man. Thanks, guys.

I knew I'd have your support here. Yeah, no problem. The ceiling is the sky. You know what I mean? There's no stopping how far you can take this. Thank God. I would like to invest for a 10% stake. I'm ready to put $540,000 into this.

Yes! Okay, thank you. I think I should probably head out then because I got a lot to do. Get a lasso. Yeah, you got to figure out your audience for this thing that I don't understand. I got to figure out my outfit. You're going to need at least one more bolo tie. That's why I dress like this now.

Dress for the job you want. Vegan rodeo clown. Thank you so much. Is there anything you've been doing that you want to direct people towards? Other than the vegan rodeo clown thing? Other than vegan rodeo, perhaps a jam that is getting punched up? I don't know. I don't know.

I don't know. I don't know. The VRC? I don't know. When does this come out? don't know. I don't know. I don't know. The VRC? I don't know. When does it come out? Two weeks. A week from Thursday. Yeah.

Yeah. So in this point in time, I am wrapping up my stint with a temporary co-host. Do you know who that is? No. Who is it? Are you ready for this? It's Chris Fleming. It's been very fun.

Whoa. That's amazing. You like that? Yeah. I do. I liked every part of it. It's been very fun. Whoa, that's amazing. You like that? Yeah, I do. I do. I liked every part of it. Uh,

it's very fun. Highly suggest. It's a great, it's a great, great time. That's all I got to say about that. It's a great time. It's not quite as good as my vegan rodeo clown idea,

but it is up there. What's the video Chris Fleming put up this year? Weird little creature. What was it? The piglio? Put some respect on the name. I'm Googling it. Piglio.

What's a piglio? Piglio. Piglio. If you haven haven't seen it it's so funny chris plumbing so funny um so tune in it's not an animal you guys fucking buttfucked me on this it's a weird little guy you guys fucking buttfucked me you really you know how we feeling bud how we feeling bud I am in the house we were talking about like going to the grocery store and like you know how sometimes they'll ask you if you have a coupon at the register like if you didn't and they were just like you're like I don't have the coupon they sure do butt fuck you if you don't have it

like saying in a very inappropriate situation I don't think there ever is an appropriate time for the term butt fuck it's so aggressive when you're doing it when you're butt fucking there ever is an appropriate time for the term butt fuck. It's so aggressive. When you're doing it. When you're butt fucking. No. You would never say, hey, do you want to butt fuck me? That's insane.

You would never say that. It's a... What is this? Boogie nights? Is that what you're not saying? It is what I said. Based on your outfit, yes, this is boogie nights. Yeah. Yeah. Don Cheadle hasn't turned the corner yet.

You're the one with the fringe. Oh, man. I'm just trying to sell some stereo equipment after this is all over. That's high-fi. That means high fidelity. My name is Ian Carmel, at Ian Carmel on Twitter, at Ian Carmel on Instagram, at Ian- How Ian Carmel is he? Pretty Ian Carmel.

He's so Ian Carmel that his eyebrows have eyebrows is that uh yeah all right yeah dude your eyebrows got eyebrows i like it yeah hey ian what was the jewish app you were gonna say when i cut you off to say how ian is he oh good call uh uh ian carmel on the the jewish um uh go god uh uh ian uh go daddy i heard go daddy you come on jewish go daddy yeah go boobie now i don't know about you but i just heard cha-ching Ching is all I hear. Go, Bobby. Go, Bobby. I just registered it. Ba-bang. Good call. You guys hear the sirens outside of my house? David, why don't you do the classic my rides here bit?

Oh. You got too close to the truth. You forget how comedy works, bro. I don't do that. All right. We're gathered here today not only to say my Ryan's here, but also to draft ROMscom, romantic comedies. Yeah, dude. Hey, how does it take this long to get to ROMcoms?

I mean, episode 675. Ian just started watching them. I'm telling you. That's what I was wondering, too. I'd never really seen ROMcoms before, and Mia, I have a girlfriend now. What? Yeah. Can you tell me who? Can you text me who? Oh my god.

Mia took her jacket off. I'm so sweaty. Instantly sweat through it. Oh my god. I'd never seen rom-coms. She deemed that unacceptable. So we've been going through rom-coms during the quarantine. Thank god for her. Thank god for her. And I've seen like all of them now. And I have, I can't believe I waited waited this long i don't know why it took me until now i can't

either i don't know i was never in the mood you had a job you were doing stuff i don't know yeah i get it yeah he's still where he's probably working more now than he was we had time to watch romantic comedies it's true in and out with them because sometimes i sort of hate them but that's only as I've gotten older. When I was younger, I really liked them. When I was like, because I did a deep dive for this. I just rewatched some shit. And I was like, a couple of them I didn't even finish.

I was like, this is whack. Yeah. No, whatever. I disagree with anything. Some of them are whack. The thing that happened is I was always. Some of them are crazy whack. You have to admit. I was always afraid that like when

i wasn't in a relationship and i was feeling like sullen and like uh cynical about love i'm like i don't want to watch something about like people falling in love and like when i was in a relationship i don't know it just never occurred to me to watch one while i was in a relationship for whatever reason now i've watched them i fucking love them i want to write one it's amazing oh here's what i'll say about the genre it It's extremely hit and miss. I think it's one of the highest hit and miss for me personally, like genres. However, when it's hit,

it hits in a way that cannot be verbalized. It is purely sounds and the sound is but emotionally, not sexually. That makes sense. There's a certain satiation. Was that a sexual sound to you i don't know maybe for you guys if you say words like butt fuck seriously maybe that's a sexual noise

too i don't know they're like so they're so cozy that's the weird thing about rom-coms is they're not they're not very they're not very sexual they can be some are but it's not the point let's get into it yeah now's not the point, yeah. Now, the way we determine the order of this draft is through a rollicking game of rock, paper, scissors played between the three of you, and we throw on shoot. Here we go. Rock, paper, scissors, shoot.

I win! Yeah! Neal wins. Oh, Neal wins! I've never wanted to win one more than I want to win this one. Because I have to go first. Damn, okay.

I'm sorry. You have to go first. I'm not going to say this yet, though. I'm not going to say this one. Because I have to go first. Damn, okay. I'm sorry. You have to go first. I'm not going to say this yet, though. I'm not going to say this yet. Before you determine the order, Mia, I want to remind you, it is a serpentine draft. And what is that? Great question. David. It's like if you, let's say that you're in the kitchen

and you're bored, you're going to make yourself a fun coffee drink that you read about on the internet, and you're like, right i'm gonna go get some sugar you go to one side of the kitchen you grab some sugar and then you grab the instant coffee which is on that same side of the kitchen and you're like oh crap i need to boil some water for this drink and i'm so bored that i could have done it while i was already over there but i kind of wanted to walk back over there so you walk back over to the other side of the kitchen and

you boil some water and then while you're doing that you're like i need some ice some ice cubes, I guess, because, you know, it's something else you need for the drink. So you pull out the ice cube tray. Ice cube tray is empty. Normally you'd get a little upset about that, but you're like, fuck it, I'm bored. I'm in a quarantine. I'm not doing anything. You walk back over to the other side of the kitchen. You fill up the ice tray. You're like, well, I'm over here. I might as well put another cup of sugar in there because I don't know what's going to keep me up today because I'm very bored so put another cup of sugar in your drink that you're going to make and you fill up the ice cube tray and then you take it back over to the freezer and you put it in the freezer then you realize that there was already some ice cubes in

there so you grab those ice cubes out put those in your drink and then you're like oh I need some milk I'm already over here I might as well put some milk in it so put some milk in there and then go back to the other side of the kitchen and you whip it up with your little mixer that you got that's supposed to froth the milk and then uh yeah you just kind of go back and forth doing things until your coffee's made so you're jewish miel looks so bored i watched it i watched you fall i watched your face sink i had a fun time watching everyone's faces just sink and just ponder. I was too. This is the worst part about it is I

have to look at everyone's face. All I could hear, it was so weird. I think there must be a glitch with my Zoom because the whole time you were talking, all I could hear was heeeeee. Yeah, my ears got really hot. It was weird. Yeah, no, I'm sweating. Yeah. I smell syrup. Basically, what it means is you pick fourth in the first round, you pick first in the second round.

With that in mind, what will the order of today's draft be? Oh, interesting. Well, let's think about it. I guess if I had to say, I'd go first. Whoopsies. Unfortunately, I do need to get my first pick, and I will have been very mad at any of you if you took it. So I had to be first.

We weren't going to pick it, I'm sure, but I can't wait to see what it is. I think there's an obvious number one pick here, and I need to have it, as it is one of my all-time favorite movies. I do, too. But all right. However, after me, who do I feel like, hmm, hmm, hmm, how can I incite the most chaos today? Let's see.

Let's see. Let's see. Sean's pointing at himself, so he will certainly not go second. He's big rom-com fan i believe i believe i'll have ian go second okay then david then sean hot corner let's fuck it up on behalf of gosh let's fuck it up hell yeah excuse me i hate to be a stickler could you just could you say god i just i get mad when people say gosh yeah i invited him into my home and my heart and he's real he walks beside me so we're in a fucking pickle right here aren't we yeah you know maybe say his fucking name he created the sun and the moon maybe say his fucking name. He created the sun and the moon. Maybe say his fucking name one time.

She created the sun and the moon, David. And I'll hear nothing else. We got one of the good ones on the line. One of the good ones to join the chat. Yep, yep, yep, yep. She created the sun and the moon and three of the planets. Which three? Which three do we know?

Earth, Venus, and Jupiter. Oh, come on. Come on. You laid it up. Oh, come on. Come on. You laid it up. You knew what you had to do. Your anus was created by the devil. Okay, there we go. He came back.

Jupiter, wash your ass with that. I'll tell you what. You got the same thing in there. You got to tweet that at Neil deGrasse Tyson. He's going to love that. Jupiter, wash your ass. Jupiter? Wow.

Ian's frantically writing something down. That hit me in the same way as when I first saw a t-shirt that said, if you see the police coming, warn a brother. And it was the Warner Brothers logo. Classic beach t-shirt. I love that. I remember my classic. Or like your t-shirt store in the mall yeah yeah that made me laugh so hard i just fell on my knife luckily the wrong way but

thank god okay maybe don't put knives where you can fall on them now that's the only place they should live i like to live life on the edge of the night. Rule number one to living alone. I'm not ready for the Law & Order episode where they investigate an accidental podcast knife death. With a serrated knife, no less. Miel, you have the first pick, which means you have the first pick in the AFE rom-com episode. It's finally here.

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and still persist to this day. It's our Cain and Abel right here, baby. Miel, it is time for your pick, the first pick in the AFE rom-com draft. Romscom. Okay. I'll have what she's having with Harry Met Sally! What?

Obviously. Wow, I'm lightheaded from getting it. I watch this movie three, four times a year, and I have for about 15 years. I can't stop. I don't know. And the thing is, I so disagree with the core premise of men and women can't be friends.

That's what I was going to say. That movie kind of sucks. In that sense, it completely fucking sucks. It does not suck. No, that part sucks. It gets on my fucking nerves and then i'm like why did you want this guy this whole time he's kind of a dick for a while she didn't want him the whole time right no no she didn't want him at all in the beginning not even close yeah i get it but then i

kind of stayed then i kind of stayed with that energy no that monologue are you fucking kidding me that monologue oh see the whole thing is that he is a dick. He's a dick the whole fucking time. And then finally, from being friends with her, he really realizes, wait, I'm a dick. And he changes. And in that monologue where he's like, oh, I'm not going to cry on air. Yeah, that's a realistic story.

She stayed with that guy and changed him. She didn't stay with him. They were never together, David. No, I mean, but she changed him eventually. None of these are realistic stories, bud. He changed. He grew. He changed.

He changed. He changed him. He changed him. His friendship with her inspired him to become a better man. It's the prequel to As Good As It Gets, really. Oh, shit. Sorry.

Ah, sorry. I said one. Ah. We all know. We all know. You said a great one, though. That one's like in there. I know.

We'll talk about it later. Just bleep it. Just bleep it. I said nothing. It nothing it's fine we're not gonna bleep it listen i haven't been on this podcast in 17 years i don't remember how this works anymore i'm sorry we have fun that's how it works but that fucking there's that movie is so funny and for not the reasons you think it is there's all these like tiny little moments like when they're playing baseball or like the batting cage and his pal's just like letting the balls hit him and he finally is like you made her meow or like fucking carrie fisher in that movie kills me there's so many just like oh my god rob reiner's mom in the deli like she's amazing every every scene in that movie i have a favorite part i the problem with that

diner scene is i'd seen it so many times before I saw the movie. Oh, for sure. You know what I mean? I can't imagine the first time you saw that. You knew it as a spoof before you knew it as a real thing to take in and be like, oh, what a scene. But can you imagine seeing that for the first time in a movie theater, how hard you would fall out? Oh, yeah. It's so fucking funny.

I bet you there were dudes who walked out. Yeah. What? I've had about enough of this. Also the like, the cut to's with the couples on the couch, like telling how they met. Like.

Oh, it's so cute. It's, it's got the. I like that, but I feel like they've used that in other rom-coms. But maybe it was that the first one. Do we know?

Yeah. It has to be. Yeah. And also like Nora Ephron. I mean, it's just, it was just like a perfect storm of casting and directing and writing. I just feel like that movie is to me the rom-com to model all rom-coms off of, in my opinion. There's some great outfits in it too. To model all of them off of.

Yeah. Like if I ever wrote one, that would be my reference point with the exception of the fade to blacks, which have not aged well. Oh yeah, the fade to blacks. I don't want to say other ones. Yeah, don't say any. But I thought there was another one that would be like. I bet we'll talk about it. The basis for this. We'll talk about it. Listen, David, this will be, as I texted Ian last night, a blood

bath and I'm ready to fight. I have a theory about rom-coms that I've developed recently because that's the only way I could have developed a theory about rom-coms. But like, the story and the romance gets propelled along by the main characters and you get all the comedy from the side characters and you have great side characters in When Harry Met Sally. Everyone brings it.

They're so, Carrie Fisher, I forget Billy Crystal's friend's name, but he's amazing. The writer who writes that restaurants are too important. Yeah. His name is Jerry Opal. He's kind of hot in that movie. What do they connect over when they're on that like double date to try to like hook each other up? She quotes his article back to him.

Yeah. And she says like, I just feel like restaurants are the new theater or something. And he's like, I wrote that. I wrote that. And she was like, I wrote that i wrote that and she was like i wrote that yeah i just love and also like uh i think they i hate to say but if you've ever like gone through a horrific breakup i think both the way that sally and harry process their horrific breakups that initially caused them to because become such good friends are so realistic to me

the way that she's like i don't feel anything i'm fine and then when she finds out he's getting married she suddenly is super fucked up. Whereas he's just like incredibly fucking depressed for so long. It's everything. It's everything. Yeah.

He's in the, the sharper image makes an appearance in that movie where he's singing the karaoke. That's my favorite part. It's like an eye rub. Fringe with a surrey on top.

Or that scene, that scene in the Museum of Natural History when he's asking her to go to a movie and she's like, I'm on a date. And he's like, are you wearing that? Or like even just the outfits. Make Ryan's outfits in that movie. I want every single one of them.

Bill Kristol's too. Some of those sweaters he's wearing are cozy. He's got some dang sweaters. I'm sorry, I have to come back to the monologue. The monologue, it has to be my favorite. It has to be my to the monologue. The monologue. It has to be. It has to be my favorite. It has to be my favorite romantic monologue in history. No, no question. When you realize you want to spend the rest of your life, somebody.

I mean, like. I cry every single time. And I've seen it 300 times. You cry every time? Every time. I'm going. I'm not going to cry this time. I practically haven't memorized and still fully wet.

Like I just went in a hot tub and it wasn't even a good one. What? And it wasn't even a good one what and it wasn't you know how like the the water from like a bad hot tub stays on you in a different way yes and a bad hotel too it's the same kind of thing you got it yeah you can feel it's like a film i don't tub enough oh brother when this is all over we're gonna get you in on that tub life i'm a tub thumper i stay stay in the pool. I don't know. Yeah, you got big pool energy, actually, now that you mention it. Yeah, I fuck with the pool heavy.

Give me a mixed drink or a beer to the side that I can swim to every now and again. That's the first thing I want to do. A pina colada with a float? Unfortunately, Sean will piss in it. He will piss in it. I sure will. That's right. Way past the point of saying I'm not going of course i will that's right public pool in palm springs i sure fucking will oh 38 year old man delighting and

pissing in a pool it's a it's a work it's a work of art public pool in palm springs yeah might as well call it a bathroom that we're all swimming in oh man i think you're the only one that feels that way but okay i don't piss in the pool yeah i'm certain you do i'm certain you do i don't i never have i would if i had to it's not like i would i assume everybody else does which is worse almost and i still go swimming it's also a great new york movie not to move away from peeing i've watched it four times since moving we can have two very intellectual conversations at once. When this is over, if restaurants still exist, I'm hitting up that restaurant, the tavern on the green or whatever, because just because of the scene in it where they go there and

she's talking. Carrie Fisher's talking about her married boyfriend and she's like, he's never going to leave her. And they're like, yeah, she's not. He's never going to leave. I just want to recreate that scene there. That's all I want to do. I'll go with you.

I'll put on a sweater. You guys want to be my Carrie Fisher and other lady? Come on. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes.

Okay. Great. Totally. Shit. That's okay. Sorry. I needed it. I needed it.

Sorry. Amazing pick. I would have loved it. I probably would have taken it first. I can't take it first. In a way, it's liberating. Yeah. In a way, it's liberating.

It's time for my first pick. Shit. I'm going gonna take something that i it's not my favorite rom-com but i think i can get my favorite one later okay so i have to take one of the another archetypal one i know it's directed by a problematic individual but i fucking love diane keaton so much that i have to take annie hall i knew well yeah yeah that's the one I thought that we were going to say was like the shot her around the world. Annie Hall's great. I think there's different, you know, people have different versions. Some people even think a newer one is the best.

But yeah, Annie Hall is for sure. Diane Keaton in it is amazing. So charming. I like some of the moments in that are like great, like relationship, like the, when they're cooking with the lobsters, you know what I mean? I know it's like a funny, like slapstick scene,

but it's also like, those are the moments that you miss from like relationships. You know what I mean? Like intimacy, those tiny intimacies, those tiny little intimacies. And I think that movie like does those tiny little intimacies. Well,

Christopher Watkins in it. And it's very funny as one of those like side characters. Yeah. I forget Woody Allen's friend's name, but like, he's Walken's in it and is very funny as one of those like side characters. Yeah. I forget Woody Allen's friend's name but like he's a funny character in it. Also the outfits again

the fashion in that movie iconic. Oh yeah. Yeah I love that movie man. Both Annie Hall and When Harry Met Sally are fun like for me because it's also like

a Jewish man's experience in encountering a shiksa which is kind of interesting. I will also say that as a non-Jewish woman who's dated a lot of Jewish men, I feel you on that one. I'm like, oh, look at that. Yeah, right?

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like, that's kind of the archetype for both. Like, you know, like Annie talking about, like, Granny Hall, like, back in where, I forget where she's from, but, like, probably Minnesota or something. We see ourselves in that movie. Yeah, I get you.

I get what you're saying. Absolutely. See ourselves in that movie. Another fun, very charming thing from when Harry Met Sally to go back to yours, like the way she orders at restaurants. I'll have the I'll have the apple pie warmed up. If you have ice cream, I'll emote, but only if it's strawberry. If you don't have ice cream, I'll just have the pie, but whipped cream, but only if it's

real. Otherwise, no, just the pie. I hated it. Wow. If there was one part of that movie that I hated, it was that. Just get the pie! She delivered it so well.

She's at work. Just get the fucking pie. Jesus Christ. Just eat the pie. Slade is at work. She's got fucking a table of seven. She's got to hear table of seven she's gotta hear your bullshit you're gonna tip a dollar on a fort eat the pie oh my god the waitress is so fed up god she's like so if i had to go somewhere so nothing with someone who ordered like that every day for the rest of my life i would shoot my fucking brains out jesus i hate it hey david

are we doing okay whenever i watch that no because that's part specifically whenever i watch that movie i'm like this is not cute i hate it it's not supposed to be cute it's also the kind of little detail though that you would like miss about someone after the fact you know what i mean or that you would think about like oh and the way she orders which is so fucking annoying but i miss it you know i get that i love that that's what makes it like real you know what i mean yeah okay what's i'm excited for more i'm right i can't wait we gotta keep going guys i'm getting too excited david it's time for your first pick i worry because i kind of want to it's like do i go

with what i want or do i snatch one from sean what cruel oh well no i know yeah the one that i was gonna snatch from sean was the one that I was going to pick. It just maybe wouldn't have been first, but I think it would have been in his first two. So I'm going to take Hitch. God damn it. That was my first pick. Of course. Yeah, of course it was your first pick.

Textbook, romantic comedy. Yeah, it's everything you want. Eva Mendez, great. Everybody's so funny. Kevin James is hilarious. Sorry, you're saying the actor's name? No, no, no. Paul Blart. Sorry. Mielle, stop. You're making me horny.

I stole Mielle's line. You got me, brother. That was great. I remember the jet ski scene and something about Ellis Island, and otherwise I don't remember that movie at all. Oh, yeah. Perfect. Yeah, it's everything you want.

Everybody's funny. I went to Ellis Island to look up her Puerto Rican ancestor's name or something like that. Are we sure? I feel like you said Puerto Rican. I don't think Puerto Rican. Where's Gadeevs or Gadees or whatever? It's the butcher or maybe it was spain maybe it was spain i forget what oh yeah you wouldn't go from puerto rico to

ellis island well anyway they're like they're a serial killer questionable on this podcast yeah yeah her yeah her ancestor was a serial killer, and she cried, and then Hitch eats some food he can't eat, and his face gets blown up. And then Albert Brenneman finds true love, and he throws his inhaler on the ground and kisses that woman. Oh, right, he comes 90-10. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

My thing on Hitch is that it's a rom-com for dudes. Yeah, I didn't connect with that movie at all. 100% it's for dudes. Yeah. I mean, the whole storyline is... Eight simple rules. Because you want to be Will Smith. So you can argue that it's obviously problematic

because he's essentially tricking women into falling for these dudes, but he has a point in the movie where he says, he's like, I'm not tricking them. I'm just trying to get you to notice him. Would you ever have noticed him if I hadn't played a part a part and she's like well no i think maybe he goes no you wouldn't have so he says he says he gets them out of their own way to see the true man inside or whatever yeah so it's you know brings me to my real question which is why i've gathered you here today do we believe in matchmaking yeah sure uh i don't think i've ever seen it work

i mean it probably i'm sure it could work i don't i don't yeah i don't know that it's worked worked on my like anywhere that i've never seen it work but i don't that's so what does that mean i haven't seen a lot of things yeah i'm in yeah people up i don't know about professional matchmaking but like within friend groups right if you're like, you know who'd be good together, doesn't that work out sometimes? Yeah, I think so. I feel like anytime I know a really good couple, that's how they met.

Yeah. It's like, oh, our friend introduced us. Okay. All right, so we do believe in magic, but not matchmaking, and also David doesn't believe anything he hasn't witnessed. This is why he believes in gosh. Wait, wait, wait, didn't wait wait wait wait

wait wait why did you slip in that believe in magic thing what are you talking about i would say that nobody said that david i don't believe in magic i want that on the book i'm sorry it was in my writer that i don't do podcast appearances unless every other person on the podcast believes in magic david we believe in magic i don't believe about it in a young girl's heart i don't believe it on the hardwood just call me by my name david i'm right here hitch yeah i have to i didn't i saw hitch was the first of these rom-coms that i watched it was like the first one we watched uh and i i don't love it i love it so good i don't love it i was watching it earlier the final scene the final

scene i love the the the wedding yeah i just love that movie man yeah i love the music they have like jimmy cliff in there and stuff yeah the music is good yeah yeah yeah it ends like two different times it's awesome yeah so hitch is david's first book sean time for your first and second picks uh my first pick i'm gonna go uh man this is hard for me yeah dude my first pick i'm going fuck man all right i'll go i'll go pretty textbook i'm gonna say crazy stupid love is my first pick that's a good one I forgot about that one

so like when I look for a romantic comedy one of my favorite things is an ensemble cast and crazy stupid love has an ensemble cast that's on every one of Sean's movies he's playing like a cool young Jewish guy in that movie yeah dude and he's playing like a cool young Jewish guy in that movie.

Yeah, dude. And he's shredded like no one's ever been shredded. That scene where she jumps on him. I don't know if I've ever felt so turned on by a movie. You're talking when they do the dirty dancing scene? Yeah. And he's bringing her down in her face and you're just like, whoa.

It looks like they have real chemistry where you're like, holy buckets. Oh, yeah. It seemed like they really wanted to have sex with each other in that movie real chemistry so important something i found lacking in hitch go on crazy stupid love well but like also compared to how they play her with josh groban like it is pretty great casting uh-huh josh groban is hilarious in that movie by the way he's a funny guy is he funny yeah i always thought he was a musician. Am I? Nah, he's a comedy guy.

He's everything. Yeah, he was very funny. I mean, Kevin Bacon's up in there killing it. It's... David Linhagen. David Linhagen. Which is the sound of... That's the name of somebody who has sex with your wife.

Yeah. He goes, oh, you're David Linhagen. Then he just turns his ring around and decks him. One thing about romantic comedies is they always get in fights that there's absolutely no way that that's how a fight goes down. Like, if you stone cold deck somebody when they're not ready for it, you break their jaw or something. Yeah, that dude is out.

It's not a playful romp where the cops show up and they're like, all right, you whippersnappers. All right, boys. It's like, yo, grown men fighting never ends okay. Like, you're an adult. You've had a trick me since oh four like you're gonna get fucked up somebody always slips and knocks out three teeth yeah yeah dude that guy has an iron deficiency dude you broke his ulna there's a grown-up crying there's like a there's like a melee with like six grown men there's two children in there you're like one grown men there's two children in there you're like

one of those children is gonna get knocked out and then that guy is probably gonna go to prison yeah oh and the horny we can't forget the horny boy I forgot about that

oh the little boy you just kept going for it which is the crush on the girl from America's Next Top Model that was like is that what she's from yeah she's a

she literally like won America's Next Top Model and then was in that movie very randomly oh wow the teen babysitter yeah who's like 27 in that movie very randomly. Oh, wow. The teen babysitter? Yeah, who's like 27 in that movie or something. It was really wild.

She did look young. I watched that movie just yesterday to get ready for this, and she does look 17. It's such a good movie. I have never seen it. I saw the same. She looked like a kid. It's amazing. I feel like they really nail on, like squarely nail to how middle-aged married men really

let themselves go in a very specific way for sure like with his new balances yeah oh yeah he was like these are my 407s and then ryan gosling's like what are you a douchebag no but it's like it's sweet because you you understand it but also you would never want to have sex with that person so like i think a dude in new balances yeah well listen i got some really cool yeah there's some dope new balances so like let's just gloss over this you guys you guys might be part of the problem okay oh man don't even make me don't even make me take out the balances i got three of you have your shoes i'm damn near middle age i'm not middle age i'll be dead soon all right so like brissa just told us not to do this but I just pulled out some new balances that are royal blue

with yellow on them and they're fucking fresher than wet paint so anyone's gonna bow to me I got some my new new balances are harder than

your old new balances I would say that oh no this is how I break up the gang the good vibes gang it's the new balance issue it's the new balance issue

this is the great recession of 2020 I'm not I'm not gonna put them on screen but they are fuego de... Also, let me just say about this about sneakers.

I don't wear them to get laid. I wear them for me. I think that's where you're going wrong. I'm going right, baby. Crazy stupid love. Ensemble cast, the humor's great. Honestly, it's pretty realistic as far as a romantic comedy goes.

Marissa Tomei's got a fun cameo. She's great. Marissa Tomei. Sad single father apartment. Yeah, I mean, my dad was in one of those. I mean, most people's divorce dads were in those. When you're like, they're like, alright, come to the apartment. You could hang out

in your room or you could hang out in the living room with me and that's it. You can't go outside because I have custody and I want to see you but I don't need to actually see you. I just don't want you outside. I didn't even have a room in this first apartment. My parents are still together so I can't relate to this. I'm sorry. Oh, on the island. Have fun.

There aren't any more houses on the island so where would they go? You might say that movie is crazy stupid good. Alright. Yeah. I would. I love that movie. I think it's I think it's absolutely perfect. Well, the two of you are going to prison. I really

was waiting for no one to talk and then Sean just went aha, yeah, no, it's great. I know. Yeah, I was trying to air it out too. That's because he knows what the silence feels like. Sean, what's your second pick? I can't. I had to sit in the silence last podcast and I felt like a real F&A hole. Pardon my friend.

I did it on purpose. Okay, whatever. You go. All right. My second pick is going to be 500 Days of Summer. Oh, okay. Thank God. Wait, what?

We think that's a great movie? I've never seen it. I love that movie. I love 500 Days of Summer. I think I might just... I have to take a lap. I'm sorry. I'll be right back.

I have a fact about it I can't share until later. Okay. But I'm excited. Yeah. Yeah. Don't forget. I've never seen it. Well, it's like a sad boy movie. I watched it a lot when I was doing sad boy shit when I was going through a decade of my life.

It chronicles. It doesn't have that happy of an ending, which I love. And again, it's got some fun cameos and things. It doesn't have that happy of an ending, which I love. And again, it's got some fun cameos and things. And it's just about like some. It doesn't have a happy ending where he's sitting in a waiting room and meet someone named Autumn. Autumn. Because he was dating Summer, you see. Who's a supermodel.

Oh, get the fuck out of here. Who's a supermodel. That's oops. Just kidding. An architect. She's a supermodel that's, oops, just kidding, an architect? She's a supermodel architect? It's Minka Kelly. No, no, no, no.

We can't be mad at jobs at rom-coms. We're not going to pick shit apart like that because that's this universe. This universe. Yeah, that's totally fair. I'm mad at the casting. She doesn't play a supermodel in the movie. Joseph Gordon-Levitt's very attractive. So is fucking zoe de chanel none of them play supermodels they can't because if you're a supermodel in a rom-com you're a different type it's just do you want to hear

my hot take sure i don't think it's a rom-com why i think it's a coming of age for a troubled man uh the takeaway from that movie is that she was she's not even actually a character in that movie the whole movie is just that this man is so badly projecting because he's like lonely and troubled. That's the point of that movie, right? We're not good at you, but you can't. No, I'm saying that's not that's not my read. I think that's like even the director is like he's a villain. Like that's supposed to be what that movie is.

It's just been largely misinterpreted. No, no, I don't know. No, I don't. Sean says no. I mean, he just it's just going through the relationship phase. It's like everything in the beginning is perfect. You think it's perfect. And then you like, you know how he liked how he rubbed her feet together, whatever.

And then it fast forwards to like two year or a year and a half into the relationship. And he hates that about her. And she doesn't like things about him. There's a fight. There's I mean, it's just got all the and it it's got all the all the ingredients and it doesn't have a happy ending which i like i mean because i had that i kind of went through something like that where a woman was like i'm never gonna get married marriage isn't for me then she breaks up with me and she got married and then because remember he sees her and he's

like so you're married and she goes yeah you know i think that's gonna be me sadly so i do understand i think it's gonna be everybody because that's what's happening all of us yeah right when you're in your 20s you just you're like oh fuck that i'm not getting married and here i am like madly in love with the woman who's upstairs i never thought i'd want to spend the rest of my life for real with somebody how can we get laura on the pod can laura do a quick shout out i'd love to get a quick laura appearance i'll bug you on the pod yeah i'll go grab her after we're yeah get a little bit farther into the draft i'll go grab her great finale thank you uh but yeah 500 days of summer i love it the pick has been made david time for your second pick second pick i think i might be picking this one

just for the straight up comedy of it it's so funny along came polly yeah dude okay yeah hell yeah oh that movie sandy lyle is the funniest so funny in any rom-com see more he's it's like it's a movie full of funny people and he's still like fucking jerry stiller's in that movie yeah that movie's hilarious his physical comedy when he slips when he walks in and just eats shit instantly. We never remember Philip Seymour Hoffman is maybe funnier than he is a good actor. When he's eating the pizza, when he's eating the pizza and he's like blotting the grease and putting it on his pizza and like, oh my God. And then like when Ben Stiller's-

That's where I learned what sharting was. Yeah. I think that's where the whole world learned sharting. And then when Ben Stiller's dad like gives it to him and he just takes it where he's like but you were funny as hell playing those bagpipes yeah oh man that movie is like almost the romance is like the minimal part who cares i just want to see philip seymour hoffman yeah that movie that movie's fucking great i fucking great romantic comedies have another funny way of doing this so in the beginning when he walks in on his brand new wife

fucking Hank Azaria in real life in real life you he's one of them is gonna die if that's in real life one of them dies but in this movie they're just like they play they have a little playful argument and then he has to drive Ruben to the hospital on the back of his moped I don't think in real life it would have happened for that character.

That character was such a worm. No, but I'm just saying. Yeah, I think he would have been like, I think he would have like, I think in real life. He would have been like, oh, I'm sorry. Yeah, he would have like seen it and then like backed out like he had never been on the boat. Yeah, but he would have gone crazy and bought a gun and killed. So I'm just saying in real life. Sean, don't project.

Sean, you're projecting. He probably would have waited outside the guy's house with a loaded gun and thought about it, but never did it. And I never told anyone until 15 years later on a podcast. I'm guessing.

Well, I just, you know, Sean, Sean, who started this podcast by saying he's doing great. I was. And I was then, too. That was for fun that I did that.

It's normal. Yeah, that movie is fantastic. The scene where he's having to take a dump in her crib. I was just going to say, I feel like we've all been there. And just that idea of going way, sometimes you go way outside of what you like to do for a girl or a guy, you know what I mean? That feeling of like, whoa, I'm way over here.

Dude, when you're like hiking down into like the deep North Carolina woods to see some white river rapid race that you're like, this is covered in ticks. I don't want to do this. You know, that relatable feeling. Yeah. I mean, you mean like start to end. Yeah.

Or like you're at some kind of like a craft fair. You thought she meant a race of people? She made it sound like they went down to like investigate the mountain people. I don't know. White rapid, right river rapids. I don't know how to say it. River white rapids. Whitewater rapids.

Whitewater rapids. Whitewater rapid river. Whitewater rapids. Either way, I love that movie. The whole thing is him being out of his comfort zone uh they have that rich billionaire guy who's very it's a very funny movie also the rom-com parts are great along came polly it's like a i think it's up there good great pick i love how this draft is unfolding so far i forgot about that one great uh it's time for my second pick

and i'm going to take i think what is maybe my favorite one remaining. I'm going to take Notting Hill. Oh yeah. I've never seen it. I thought I was going to get it. I've never seen it. Hugh Grant, popular Hugh Grant vehicle, right? Huge Grant. Julia Roberts is in it, man. It's amazing. So here I can drop

the fact about 500 Days of Summer too. Richard Curtis is the guy who wrote it. He also wrote another rom-com that's uh very well known that may appear on this draft uh i think he's written a few rom-coms actually but uh he did a uh zoom session like on the show so we've had like every friday although we had it every day for a while not important we'd have like a speaker come on and like talk to people so like people wouldn't just be sitting at home doing nothing all day and richard curtis who wrote nodding hill and several other movies came on and did like a q a with us and uh of his favorite movies 500 days of summer is one of them and he's and richard curtis is like one of the rom-com gods

and he says he didn't say it was a rom-com he also doesn't consider his movies rom-coms uh which i don't even know what that means hill's a fucking classic what does he say they are then he's like i just write movies about people you know yeah and it's like well there's a way to argue they're not rom-coms or whatever but they you know it's a big umbrella run me down nodding hill i assume it's about some type of architect no and or no he works at a books he works at a travel bookstore he's like a lonely bookseller and that's a rock does he own it though yes but he's not the main draw the girl is yeah the girl is julia roberts basically playing herself oh so she's a rich movie star she's a movie star in london shooting a movie and he's

so notting hill is this neighborhood that now in london is very posh and expensive but back then was like not as expensive and not quite as posh but like uh still i think probably pretty expensive and posh but maybe a little more like kitschy yeah the kitschy yeah for sure and like he owned a little bookstore on there and lived in like a flop house like behind the blue door like so he lived in a he had a roommate 10 million dollar flat i don't even know what like i don't know what it would cost now but like it looks like a first apartment it's like a divorce apartment in fact it is a divorce apartment uh and he has a and he has a roommate played by re oh i forget the guy's name yeah yeah he's so Yeah. Reese. He's so fucking funny.

He's so funny. And it's Spike. And then so like there's another good like secondary character driving comedy. And then he's got like this group of friends and like his sister and everything who like who he hangs out with, you know, who are like grounded. It's really grounded for the except with the exception of her being like a world famous actress falling in love with like a random British man. It's extremely grounded. Oh's really grounded for the except with the exception of her being like a world famous actress falling in love with like a random British man. It's extremely grounded.

Oh, that doesn't happen. It could, I guess. I mean, didn't she gives the monologue in that movie, which is such a great twist on the archetype. I love. Yes. You know, the one, you know, the one, David, you know, the one without even saying it, David, I'm just a girl standing in front

of a boy that's that yeah that's one of the best things about a rom-com is when people realize like oh shit that thing that i've seen i haven't seen it but yeah i know that well you know do you know fancy a fuck that's also rotting hill fancy a fuck why i would yeah what did no horse and hound also notting hill what are you saying on the horse and hail quote so funny he like she tells him to come see her at her hotel but she's doing a press junket so he has to pretend he works for a horse and hound magazine okay that's fun that's very cute it's so cute you have to see it you have to see it there's another i forget like during the notting hill i'm just a girl what like uh what hugh grant says back to her is also very like i don't remember that oh so this is this is like after the grand gesture

like i'm just a girl you know ask and standing in front of a boy so what hugh grant says back later in that scene is the thing is with you i'm in real danger it seems like a perfect situation apart from the foul temper of yours but my relatively inexperienced heart would i fear not recover if i was once again cast aside as i absolutely expect to be there's just too many pictures of you, too many films, you know, you'd go and I'd be a, well, buggered basically. It's like my,

my inexperienced heart, like, cause she's like this, like jet center who's all around the world, blah, blah. And he's just like, yeah,

he's going to see her again. That's that, that does sound like the worst. Yeah. Imagine if like you would just dated like Rihanna once. And then you were like, oh, well, good luck with the singing career. Imagine if you had just dated Rihanna once, and she kind of fucked you up, and then you were like, oh, well, good luck with the singing career,

and then she becomes Rihanna, and you're just like, oh, word, she's on TV. No, cool, Fenty, cool, man. There's just so many good scenes in it. The one where they bring Julia Roberts to dinner with his friends, it's so fucking good. So yeah, Notting Hill. Mielle, your second and third picks okay i'm going from heart and heart alone and if that person who grades these on twitter gives me a bad grade for

this i'll block them i will yeah they'll give you a bad grade don't you give me a bad grade don't you fucking dare i'm these are so near and dear to my heart and i have to pick them both in quick succession i'm so happy to get them both. Okay, are you ready? Okay. First pick. I'm going with another classic. Gotta Go Moonstruck. I've never seen Moonstruck. I have not seen Moonstruck either.

How many rom-coms win Best Actress, y'all? That's a testament to how fucking good Moonstruck is. I don't know. I don't even know who was in it share one best actress you know who she falls in love with in that movie nicholas cage nicholas you don't want to see that fucking movie oh you just watched that movie yesterday uh re-watched that movie yesterday i watch it twice a year if i go if i start going bald i'm gonna start

calling myself thickless cage oh wait why do i have to wait to go bald? Can we do that now? Hi, I'm Thickless Cage. Welcome to No Fantasy Everything. I'm Thickless Cage. Welcome to... There's a secret on the back of the U.S. Constitution. I'm Thickless Cage. Do you think you're going to go

bald? You've gone a long way. I feel like you're kind of... It's thinning a little bit, but like, whatever. No, thinning a little bit but like whatever no you got some good years left you got some good years left oh yeah this is gonna get me and even then ian you become a hat guy you're gonna be unstoppable oh my god forget i'm already on my way once you get it once you become a hat guy you're gonna have to start directing i'm making moves and that's the trajectory that is true that's not sad that's great that's that's what you do later on right yeah you're into directing yeah absolutely you become less funny i listen you guys have to see

moonstruck moonstruck is so great because again it has the ensemble but instead of it being the funny friends it's the italian family it is and it's like it's really like it's not just like what are you doing where's my work i mean like literally like the song of the movie is like that's amore like it's and it's like in like bro like the song of the movie is like that's amore like it's and it's like in like Brooklyn Heights and like the early

like late 80s early 90s like it's just it's this perfect time capsule of like a New York that like definitely hasn't existed for some time but also like

the love story I mean literally the scene where I put it on my Instagram story last night I love it so much so essentially Cher is engaged

to this man who she doesn't love. She's a widow. And so she doesn't want to love her partner ever again because it was too painful to lose him. And she's convinced she has bad luck. So she's just going to marry this kind of like sad sack guy who like kind of sucks.

And then he proposes he has to go to Italy to say goodbye to his dying mother. And so he's like, can you talk to my brother with whom I'm estranged and invite him to the wedding? And so she goes and it's Nicolas Cage who is missing part of his hand. And that's why him and his brother are estranged because he was talking to his brother when he sliced off part of his hand in the bread machine. It's like this insane chip on his shoulder. She's trying to win him over. And then instantly

they're like, wait, fuck, we're in love. And so they start kissing like instantly they fall in love. They start kissing and then they're like no we can't and then he just picks her up and goes son of a bitch right into camera wow did the moon hit his eye like a big pizza pie exactly and the moon is like kind of a character in the movie they keep the moon is so big that all of the love stories throughout the movie between her mom and dad and like the dad's having an affair, the mom's debating having an affair. Like everybody is so horny

in this movie. It's so, and then like the dad with his 15 dogs were all super horny. Like it's just, it's, it's,

there's nothing like it and it makes you feel, I don't know. Again, like if, if Aramico. Does his mouth start to drool just like pasta for Jules?

That's exactly correct. Does his mouth start to drool just like pasta for Jules? That's Amore. Yeah, you got it. Okay. So it's just like pasta fagioli? That's exactly correct. Does his mouth start to drool just like pasta fagioli? That's amore. Yeah, you got it. Okay. So it's just like a big Italian horn off?

Basically exactly correct. Also, the moon is involved. You got to see it. You guys, you got to see it. An opera? Everyone should watch The Great Italian Horn Off on Netflix.

It's so charming. It's really calming. The G.I.H.O.? G.I.H.O. and GBBO is my Friday night, baby. So Moonstruck's number two. What's number three, Miel? Well, damn, I should have chosen a different order.

I thought everyone wanted Moonstruck. Okay, number three. You made it sound like these two were like a one-two combo. Well, they're totally unrelated to each other, but for me and my heart, they are a one-two combo. This is the only, I would say, modern rom-com I like, at least in the same way i've seen it so many times that i quote it without even thinking about it it is forgetting sarah marshall

a lot that movie it's so long that's why i don't watch it very often but i like that movie it's so funny i thought i could get that round four it's perfect i don't know i thought it was gonna come up it was on my list but i thought it was going to come up. It was on my list, but I thought it was going to come up. It's Jason Segel going full frontal in his big writing debut. I can't. I can't with that man. There's some fun stuff.

That movie, when he's on the beach with her and she meets her ex-boyfriend and that guy hits him in the face. That happened for real to him when they were filming the movie. He met a local girl when they were in Hawaii and they were on the beach and her ex-boyfriend showed up and almost got in a fight with him. So that scene in the movie kind of happened to him for real when he was filming the movie. What?

That's very funny. Paul Rudd in that movie makes me laugh so fucking hard where he's like, oh, you got some sadness behind those eyes, Peope. Peope, him and Jonah Hill and Russell Brand. Phenomenal in that movie, by the way. Yeah, he is really funny. So another thing, they wrote that his character, Aldous Snow, was supposed to be like a writer or something.

And Russell Brand came in and auditioned like that, like in the rock star shit. And he's just like, fuck it, I'm going to be a rock star. And they're like, okay. So they rewrote it as a rock star for russell brand because he was so funny when all the little stuff when he's just like yeah i'm staying about five days oh perfect perfect amount of time mate just tiny little things where you're like fuck you that's my ex-girlfriend you're fucking her i hate you or even like the dracula musical which like plays such a back seat but like watching him try

to write that he's like see a psychiatrist i don't want to see a psychiatrist he's just like it was such like a real vignette of what it's like to write a song when you fucking absolutely don't want to when he's he's talking to bill hater and he goes sarah's not like liz sarah's better than liz and he goes do you really want to have this conversation he's just dating he's dating like a superstar and uh Bill Hader is married to a woman and he's just like my woman's better also they're like stepbrothers and he brings that up which is really funny uh-huh yeah that movie's that movie's very funny or even like the fucking guy who can name like 500 types of fish is so funny in that movie what happened with Huma Nuka Nuka Puaha. What happened with that guy? That guy was in like three movies with like seven lines and he crushed it and then I never

saw him again. It's a great question. I don't know. My only problem with that movie is it's like three fucking hours. It's a thick cut of meat. It's a thick cut. The structure is confusing. It's like it's got like a fake.

It's got like two fake endings. Yeah, it's pastry. I really like it. It's just every time I go to watch it I'm like I don't want to watch this there's just there's so many crazy funny lines when he like when he spills on himself they're all like little throwaway lines

he spills on himself at dinner he's like oh no take my eyes not the shirt because he didn't want to wear it in the first place yeah he didn't want the shirt all that stuff where Jonah Hill's on the phone is the way as the maitre d and he's like I can't sell you some weed i'm at fucking work at my job i can sell you some weed when i'm done oh me la cunas is really fucking funny that movie too everybody everybody brings it yeah that movie's great yeah it's it's fantastic i really i love it i think

that's perfect you know the people who send us that marshall's hot sauce that really good hot sauce my friend dirk makes yeah their last name is marshall his wife's name is sarah marshall oh god that movie came out i remember there's and like their marketing campaign was something about like fuck sarah marshall or whatever was up on like billboards or whatever you remember that to take jason siegel's face off of it because it was so upsetting to the focus groups really really they don't like his face that his face? They did not like his face. That's not a joke. What a bummer to hear.

Like, hey, man, we know you wrote this hit movie, but your face bums people out. Can't be on the posters. Great pick. Time for my third pick. I can't believe it's still here. I got to take You've Got Mail. Oh, yeah.

You've Got Mail. You've Got Mail. We did that for Watch Along, and Tom Hanks is a villain in that movie. He's a villain. Like a total villain. You don't realize it, but he's like, you put this woman out of business. He represents capitalism.

That's an anti-capitalist story. Yeah, but I mean, and then he like faked like he wasn't her, talked her into falling in love with his internet character. That movie never sits right with me. That's why it's not on my list. It's crazy. It's so good, but he's a fucking asshole. I think the real star of that movie is Parker Posey.

Parker Posey's fantastic in it. Meg Ryan's in fantastic. I mean, this speaks to Tom Hanks' ability as an actor and as a lead in a rom-com, which is you don't hate him as much as you should. No, I didn't hate him at all until we watched it like a year ago. And then I was like, oh, oh, well, fuck.

I'm the asshole then. I apologize. Yeah. It's a Nora Ephron banger. I'm not going to mention other ones, but it's my favorite Nora Ephron movie. You would put one, you've got mail over When Harry Met Sally.

Oh, never mind. My bad. No, I'm an idiot. I'm an absolute idiot. Sorry, I'm thinking of a different Nora Ephron movie. Thank God. No, no, no.

No, I know which one you're thinking of. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Thank God. I immediate redacted from the record. No, I just was like, I thought we were going to have to stop being friends. I was really scared.

Absolutely not. I was going to have to charge you $1,000 on Venmo for that. No, don't worry. I've still got Miel. Uh-huh. Thank you. Oh, man.

A booga booga. It's also such a great time capsule now for like a bygone era that's like, I feel like largely forgotten. Yeah. Like the AOL culture is so perfectly captured in that movie. Yeah, those years before the internet, we kind of forgot. Like right before. Right before, yeah. Yeah, those years before the internet, we kind of forgot. Like right before. Right before, yeah.

Also, powerful bookstores. Yeah. Right. Total romantic comedy shitter, bookstores and architects, for sure. I was in a bookstore with Sean the other day and I was thinking like, this thing is serious. Yeah.

Say that, hey David, say that again, will you? Will you say that first part again, please? You know the fucked up part? I'm not even talking about Powell. I'm talking about when we walked through Starbucks to go to the mall. No, I think Sean wants you to say that he was in a bookstore. Yeah, me all got it. Oh, he bought a book.

Ian's got a girlfriend. Sean bought a book. What the fuck's going on over there? Ian's got a girlfriend. Sean bought a book. Sean's got a book. Ian's got a girlfriend. Sean bought a book.

Sean's got a book. Ian's got a girlfriend. Sean bought a book. Sean's got a book. Ian's got a girlfriend. Sean bought a book. Sean's got a book. Ian's got a girlfriend. Sean's got a book. Ian's got a girlfriend. Sean's got a book. Sean's got a book. Ian's got a girlfriend. Sean's got a book. Sean's got a book. Can't read.

Can't read. David's got a knife. David's got a knife. I lost it. You've got Miel. Yeah. David, time for your third pick. Third pick.

I am going, because somebody had to pick an Apatow joint i'm going knocked up yeah fantastic still makes me laugh the ensemble in that one well that was like uh the beginning of that of the whatever pack you want to call them is forgetting sarah marshall not on apatow is that i didn't think so i don't think so i think it's just got the crew but like knocked up was the first no because alda snow plays the same character in that and get into the greek which I didn't think so. I don't think so. Maybe not. I think it's just got the crew, but like Knocked Up was the first. No, because Aldous Snow plays the same character in that and Get Him to the Greek, which isn't it, right? Or am I crazy?

Is Get Him to the Greek in Apatow? I don't think either one of them are, but I don't know. Keep talking, I'll research. Okay. But so technically there was a movie that had that whole pack in it before Knocked Up, and Knocked Up was the first one where they were at the center.

40-year-old virgin they were all into. Oh, Nicholas Stoller. I know. Whoa wow that's a pick you just trying not to say other picks oh but pick david just blew shit i forget that that's uh that's a uh rom-com oh no john apatow per john apatow produced that it was it's an apatow world anyway it doesn't matter that's not important well yeah of course it does in the world that we're in right now it does but uh that was the first knocked up is where you see like seth rogan paul rudd and uh uh romany malco and or no not romany malco who the fuck was in uh knocked up jason siegel jonah hill uh jay baruchel

martin star the whole crew from freaks and geeks they were all in and shining before apparently people i didn't i guess she's not a nice lady. So wait, actually, I have a Catherine Heigl story. Tell it. I was at the Rose Bowl flea market. I love that one. It was so odd.

I've had a lot of celebrity interactions, obviously, but like this one just struck me because it was so strange. I mean, obviously, look at me. Look who I hang with. I run with A-listers, clearly.

I'm wearing a bolo tie. It's all over me. You know Sean's in a basement right now. Yeah. Sean is like one word away from getting beheaded on camera right now. My friends just texted me. They're giving me shit. They're like, what are you in the fucking garage?

So what if I am? Because someone took a screenshot and posted it. And they're like, what are you in the fucking garage? I'm like, yeah, it's a studio that I built. I'm taking a picture to post it with the exact same caption. It was me. I'm not, no shade on that. I'm just saying like

I got people coming at me like, yeah, I'm just a place for me. Okay, I have to finish my Catherine Heigl thing while I forget. So I came out of the Rose Bowl flea market and the cars were all parked like fucking jigsaw puzzle pieces just dumped on a table over there. It's insane trying to navigate the like yard area. And so I came out I came out of the Rose Bowl flea market and the cars are all parked like fucking jigsaw puzzle pieces just dumped on a table over there it's insane trying to navigate the like yard area and so I'm walking like through like carrying some big painting or something back to my car and I hear someone screaming and as I like come out from behind a car there's Catherine Heigl like carrying some large fucking I don't know saddle or suit of armor whatever the fuck

she had been purchasing. And she's turned around screaming at a paparazzi because he's trying to take her picture. And it was the most insane. It was like Sunday morning at like 8 a.m. I was like, I can't right now. I fucking hate Los Angeles. Yikes. And that's what drove me to move to New York, actually that makes sense that makes sense i get it knocked up is like i think knocked up is pretty problematic actually but it is so funny

that it's kind of hard to be mad about it i would have thought a car drove you to move from los angeles all right sean is that a side effect of the virus a car drove you to move from Los Angeles. All right, Sean. Is that a side effect of the virus? Do we think? Is he okay? Have you been tested? The side effect of being a born comedian.

Oh, that's what it is. Well, I'm a born again comedian, and I didn't like it. Man, you better wash your ass with that. I'll tell you what. Wash your ass with that and hang it out to dry for a while for all I care. You know who doesn't ask me to wash my ass? The Lord.

Damn. Gosh. Gosh. My Lord. Gosh herself. Yeah, that movie's just really funny and it's like, I get it. You're going to have a kid now. You got to break your bong.

That seems like a lot. Yeah, it does. Yeah, yeah, yeah. She would just never have sex with that man. Sorry. Okay. She would in real life never have sex with him. Is that what you're saying?

Even, even like trying to suspend disbelief for a minute. I just, I, it's like that wouldn't, it's just, I can't. As a Seth Rogen type.

Yeah. Yeah. I disagree. Yeah. I disagree too. And here's the core difference. Yeah. You have a great job.

You're extremely funny and charming and intelligent and educated and you live alone or at least you have a house. Oh, thank you. That man is an absolute slob. He's not saying that he's Seth Rogen right now. There's like five dudes who are doing good in your 20s. I'm just saying you're already not in that same league

so it doesn't apply. I don't know. I think that you don't realize how often losers can bag one good one. That's what I think that you don't realize how often losers can bag one good one. That's what I think. If she isn't just hot, maybe, but to be hot and successful, I just don't buy it. She is hot and successful.

I understand the complaint. You don't think hot and successful people hook up with dumb people? With like 10 roommates? Have you not met any of the comics I know? That's wild. That's wild. That's wild. We are professionally charming, though. I mean, it's like.

That's what I'm saying. It's exempt with that type. He was charming, too, though. He was still himself. No, he wasn't. He's like. That's all he does. No. That was the whole reason it worked was because he was charming.

I think that you are life position shaming him is what i think yeah that's true yeah i don't like that am i projecting from experience perhaps who's to say no because if you're projecting from experience then you already had sex with one of those guys not when i was successful your whole shit's ass ass stuff so i need to wash my ass is what you're saying that That's right. I think that's what I'm saying. Yeah, you're right. Sean hit her with it. I have been trying not to get involved.

God damn it. You're not going to say wash your ass? You better wash your ass. Oh, you fucking fluid. Oh my God, dude. I'm really, that just triggered my depression. I'm mid-episode again. How did you not get that?

Gary Payton threw the alley-oop, and Sean Kemp is just sitting there reading a magazine, reading Hunt, Hunt, Hunt, Hunt. My man. Hound and Horse and Hound. I thought you guys were fighting. I was going to let you fight. I'm sorry.

Sean. We were just, it was all a ruse to alley-oop you, my man. Oh, if there was ever a time. Horse and Hound and. Well, now I'm bummed. Now I'm bummed out. Okay, I guess who has the next pick? Whatever. Sean,

you have the third and fourth pick, Sean. All right. So for third pick, I Oh, man, there's so so many. Yeah, dude. All right. My third pick, I'm going to pick gross point blank.

Oh, that's a good one john q's at i love gross point blank uh again it's got some fun little it's got your dan akroyd in there it's got your jeremy piven being a real funny jeremy piven and it's just such a fun fun movie of this thing and like this serial or this hitman going back to his hometown. Gross point? Yeah. What's the lead's name? Is that Andy McDowell? No. No, it's Minnie Driver. She's the DJ at the local radio station? And she sees him outside walking down the street and like something like, oh, is a man

ever come back into your life mysteriously? Because he's right out there. It's just such a fun, hilarious, hilarious movie. Dan Aykroyd kills it and just the idea of thinking of these two hitmen where dan akroyd's like i want to shoot you in your head i want to fuck the brain hole jesus dude it's funny that it's all based around a high school reunion yeah and they go he goes and joan cusack is in it too isn't she yeah she plays a secretary i love her the joan john one two combo cannot be

beat yeah it's fantastic yeah they're gonna come up again guarantee it yeah they're great yeah i think gross point blank is good good one i think it's perfect great pick uh and your fourth pick fourth pick i'm going john joan again i'm picking high fidelity ah there it is. I thought you were going to take that second. Is it a rom-com? Is it? It probably is. Yeah. It is.

Yeah, for sure. I mean, what else are you going to call it? A com-com? A com-com? Because I've thought about this a whole bunch, and that's why I didn't pick it early on, because it's weird to pick it first when it's not clearly in the genre. Like, it's not like Hitch, but what else are you going to call that movie? It's a love story. It's hilarious. It's romantic. Yeah, I guess it's a rom-com. It's a rom-com.

It's just like, it's so cool. It's a rom-com drom, but I'll give it to you. Well, so is 500 Days of Summer dramatic as fuck? I mean, some of these like, it's so I think High Fidelity is so cool and good in so many other ways that people don't want to classify it as a rom-com, which I always stick up for it because it is a rom-com.

It's a romantic comedy. It's just perfect all around. So it's pretty problematic, actually. But it is very fun. The rape thing. I don't remember that. What? There's like a there's a part in it that's like bad, like real bad.

But other than that. And High Fidelity. Yeah. in it that's like bad like real bad but other than that in high fidelity yeah like one of the girlfriend plot lines is like that he's mad no yeah no i know what you're talking about she goes i had sex with a guy and i it wasn't rape because i didn't say no but it wasn't far off so she's saying he's like mad about it she's saying that she she fucked it don't she's he didn't rape her she's saying she fucked a guy she didn't want to but she did because she wanted to have sex and she just she does word it iffy but she doesn't say she got raped sounds like she's saying she had kind of non-consenting sex and then he's like pissed i know exactly what she said she says i had sex with a guy and it wasn't rape because i

didn't say no but it wasn't far off and she's mad at him and then she says just because i was too tired to fight off that little shit bag or something. So that's what I'm saying. So that kind of is rape, though. I just that part really does get under my skin in a way that makes it hard for me to enjoy that movie. But it's real. I mean, I could cut that part out. What a great film.

But it happens. I mean, unfortunately, that's happened to a ton of people. So it's a real scenario that's put in a movie and them addressing it a little bit like she's calling him an asshole for it they they don't dive into that storyline because that dude has nothing to do with the movie but she clearly shows how it fucked her up for her whole life she blames rob for not having sex in college so she's talking about high fidelity with zoe kravitz no that was the tv show i i i know that tv series is good though i really love the tv show yeah it know. That TV series is good, though.

I really love the TV show. Yeah, it was great. Shout out to Solomon. Shout out to Solomon, dude. It was so good. It was one of my favorite shows I've seen in the last year. Also, like Catherine Zeta-Jones. Yeah.

The ex-girlfriends of the movie are so hot. It is. It's such a... I feel like you don't like uggos getting a chance at hotties. John Cusack's a good looking guy. I don't think John Cus a chance at hotties. John Cusack's like a good looking guy. I don't think John Cusack's ugly. I think John Cusack's hot too. It's an unfair world. The romantic comedy is an unfair world for sure.

Oh, I think, I don't, I don't think John Cusack is an attractive guy. He's not even close to Catherine Zeta-Jones attractive. Yeah, I think he's like a normal looking dude. There are no men who are as hot as Catherine Zeta-Jones.

Yeah. No, that's true. Just based on physiology. We're all, you know, even like uh, what's his name?

Cristian Ronaldo might be that hot. Maybe for like one season. Yeah, high fidelity. That'll be my fourth pick. High fidelity. And if you haven't watched the TV show, great TV show. Shout out to Solomon Giorgio. David, time for your fourth pick.

Uh, uh, ooh. Great TV show. Shout out to Solomon Georgiou. David, time for your fourth pick. Man, I've just been going funny this whole time. Movies that I think that are funny. And in that vein, I will continue with the movie. I don't know if any of you have seen, but I would be remiss if I did not pick The Wood yeah The Wood I was gonna I was gonna lip it with you what do you mean you don't know if I've seen The Wood you dickhead? No I mean you had I meant Ian and Mielle might not have seen it

I have not seen it. We've talked about it what is it? It's about big old boners ah I'm listening you had my interest but now you have my attention bad timing yeah very you guys I don't want to spoil any future pics. I'm sorry I said it. Yikes. Oh, my God. Jeez, Louise.

That bolo tie makes way more sense. It's a coming-of-age movie about three young boys growing up in Englewood. Yeah, and then eventually him being in love. It's like on the day of his wedding, and he's trying to get out of his wedding, and they remind him about his whole life, and then how much he actually loves this woman, and they sober him up, and then he gets to get out of his wedding, and they remind him about his whole life, and then how much he actually loves this woman, and they sober him up, and then he gets to the church. But in the meantime, he goes to his ex-girlfriend's house.

Yeah, it's just a fun, just fun and light. And I love movies based around a wedding. I think that's like a very good premise to write a movie around. Wait, you're telling me Omar Epps and Taye Diggs are in the same movie oh they sure that's right i didn't see this it's it's fucking good i think i saw it in theaters uh yeah but yeah it's just a good it's just i love movies around weddings i think weddings are the perfect like because weddings are always super dramatic you know yeah dramatic and fun and it's like those are the two things they ever are. Actually, you guys, that is my hinge profile.

Dramatic and fun. Dramatic and fun. How's that looking? If there's two things young single dudes are looking for... Kill it with the ladies. I gotta see this movie. Yeah, it's really great, and it has a pretty good soundtrack.

Great pick. time for my fourth pick uh the moment i wake up i know what you're saying before i put on my makeup i say a little prayer for you forever and ever you're here in my heart. I will love you forever. I'm taking my best friend's wedding. Oh, Sean's wedding? Sean's wedding. God, we could make a romantic comedy out of my wedding somehow.

We probably could, yeah. I love that they don't end up together in that movie. It's so great. It's so great. It's fucking, it's so great it's fucking i mean it's true it's julia roberts your boy i think dermot moroni is in it cameron diaz rupert everett so like the thing that makes like my best friend's wedding different than i kind of like is that like it's more about julia roberts and cameron diaz yeah so her like julia roberts has been friends

with this guy like since forever and like you know they've like I think he liked her they didn't really they never really dated they were just really good friends and then he's getting married and she's like oh shit I think I I think I really like this guy and he's marrying a 20 year old Cameron Diaz who's like which also in hindsight shakes out to be like when I first because that movie came out before I was 20. So the first time I saw it, I was like, OK, that's really grown up. You're like, he's going to marry a 20 year old. She's in college and he's 28. Yeah.

Yeah. It's super gnarly. You shouldn't have been even hanging out with her, bro. She's great. She plays this like babe in the woods type. You know what I mean? But like secretly she's rich. She's rich, but also secretly she's like really smart and also very conniving so like julia roberts who's this like incredibly manipulative person she's a bad person in this

movie but she comes in and she thinks like oh i can get rid of this girl easy and then like because camera because she's 20 what does she know but then cam diaz is like also pretty smart big mistake fucking and so like fights back and like between the two of them it's so funny Because she's 20. What does she know? But then Cam Diaz is like also pretty smart. Big mistake. Fucking. And so like fights back and like between the two of them. It's so funny. There's a lot of fun like Pratt Folly type stuff in it. It's great.

It's a great Chicago movie. What upset you? Fucking. Also like the ultimate romance between in that movie ends up being between her and her friend. Which is like so sweet. Rupert Everett who is is fantastic where if we were drafting and we may do this one day but i'll say it anyway uh side characters and rom-coms rupert everett in my best friend's wedding is like that's s tier fucking right up there for me george her friend

george uh but yeah my best friend's wedding my fourth pick i just fucking love it it's so good we guys this is everyone is drafting very good movies right now. I don't think any of these have been bum picks. It is a thick genre. Miel, time for your fourth pick and your final ones, as it is. A serpentine draft. I'm really debating if I want to try some bullshit right now or not. You've got to let something in on the last one.

I think I have to. Okay, so let me pick an obvious gotta let something in on the last one i think i think i have to okay so let me pick let me pick an obvious one then for my second to last one i have to go clueless yeah dude oh yes i had it on my list my main takeaways from that movie were uh paul rudd paul rudd and paul rudd he looked older in that movie than he does now are you talking about kind of a baldwin i think that's like that's like i definitely had a crush before that but that's the first time i remember identifying that i had a crush like when i first saw that when i was like eight or nine i was like the brother though who's that brother though and i remember i thought he was so hot

that I think in one of the scenes, he's like watching TV, eating the shredded wheat. Remember the shredded wheat with raisins in the middle? Uh-huh. No. He's eating that.

He's eating that while watching this movie. And so I tried to get into that cereal because I was too young to understand that was a character and that wasn't going to like win me over to Paul Rudd personally. Also a young Brittany Murphy in that movie that movie oh she's so good or that guy was like a jeremy jeremy sisto oh and the love story between the teachers and the friend and donald faze on like

that movie's just so and the thing that's so clever about it stacy dash which i'm not gonna say anything about her breckin meyer's up in there for a second he's the skateboarder uh-huh i feel like i the first like i don't know when i was a younger person and i watched that movie i thought it was kind of like a ditzy chick flick and then i watched it again like for the first time since being a kid i don't know in my 20s and i was like wait this is a legitimately fantastic comedy that we kind of all wrote off because it stars a woman that's great it's so good we did i think maybe people younger did i think people of the time ranked that movie where it's supposed to i don't i don't think people wrote it off at all people yeah people celebrate

that movie as a comedy i watched it a million times when i was a kid i was probably 13 14 i watched it it's one of my it's earnestly one of my favorite movies. I love it. It's so funny. And also like, I mean, Alicia Silverstone, I, it's an incredible comedic performance that I think is like often forget, forgotten when we talk about comedic performances. Also the dad who's like constantly on the verge of like blowing out his neck

artery. Like what is his name? He's such a good dad. He's such a good, she takes such good care of him. It's so sweet. I think that actor, though, is just so, so good at that. I'm going to find it.

But yeah, that movie. I loved it. Soundtrack is sick. Yeah, it's just fun. It's a good ass high school movie. I love those. She had that Jeep. That Jeep.

Oh, and the braces. Oh, everything. It's just everything about that movie. I mean, it's hard to talk about because it's so iconic that like I almost feel like I'm too oversaturated by that movie at any given point. But fuck, it's still good. I've been listening to a Scrubs podcast with Donald Faison, and he talked about in that movie he was a hat guy because he was already going bald.

So they shaved his head and made him wear hats all the time because he's got a baby face. But yeah, it's really funny really funny too when they shave his head and she's freaking out. I forget that that was like an extreme thing to do. Yeah. No, don't call my mom.

Don't call my mom. You're right. Like that's like Fab Five influence, right? Yeah. I think Clueless is a better movie than it is a rom-com. Yeah. If that makes sense.

I don't know. The romance of that movie is not that great. I think it's there. It's more coming of age and friendship to me than rom but like

it ends in a wedding so it definitely the whole thing is that she's like trying to get a guy and like I think if you watch it as a romcom

you'll see it for a romcom because I from the first time I ever saw it suspected the sexual chemistry between her and Paul Rudd the whole time I might need to give it

another with those eyes it's there it's there and then she tries to make it happen with that guy like yeah it's great

okay I'm gonna fuck it up for the last one. I'm choosing In Bruges. No, it's great. I've never seen it. In Bruges is really good. I've never seen it. It's two hitmen, Brendan Gleeson and Colin Farrell, who fuck. What?

Spoiler. Yeah. That's a big. Okay, sorry. Bleep it. I don't care. Anyway, yeah, the foundation for any great rom-com. It's a big. Okay, sorry. Bleep it. I don't care. Yeah, the foundation for any great rom-com. It's not really a rom-com.

That's what I'm saying. There's no love. There's no. Well, but this is what I'm trying to say. So I have to spoil it to tell you how I think it's a rom-com. So I guess. So am I supposed to pick Players Club next? What are we talking about?

If you haven't seen, if you haven't seen Imbrusion, you don't want to spoil. Fast forward like two, three minutes. Listen, it's about two hitmen and the one hitman has been tasked to kill the other hitman and so he's trying to take him on like a nice vacation

before he has to kill him and it is it is very funny but it's also a love story in my opinion therefore it's a rom-com thank you for your time

I love it I think that's a great choice and ultimately ultimately I'm not gonna tell you the very end but ultimately listen it's a love story it's absolutely a love story that is a great choice. And ultimately, ultimately, I'm not going to tell you the very end, but ultimately, listen, it's a love story. It's absolutely a love story.

That is a wild take. That is wild. I don't understand how it's a rom-com. I guess I got to see it. It's a story of love between two co-workers. Is it a romantic love? I think it's very, I think going to Bruges together and trying to treat someone to a nice vacation is very romantic.

And also, Ralph Fiennes is like in it in the best way. You have to see it. It's a fantastic comedy. bruges together and trying to treat someone to a nice vacation is very romantic and also ray finds is like in it in the best way you have to see it it's a fantastic comedy and i would say rom comedy thank you again yeah feels like you're ass betting to me i'll let it slide because i've never seen it but seems it seems like you're wearing wolf tickets right now you're telling me that two people a pair of people with a long-withstanding relationship going to a romantic town together for a nice time treating each other sacrificing everything for love isn't a rom-com it is is it romantic love who's to say who's to say who's to say i'm not trying to read the underlying queer messaging who's to say what okay i don't i think this is maybe a not i mean we can

i've never seen it i've never seen it i've never seen it i've never seen it i've never seen it i've never seen it it's a wild take we'll leave it at that all right wild all right having seen it a bunch it's great though david you should watch it i'll watch it my final pick my fifth pick i can't believe we have left one of the true queens of the genre on the board this long who is that nancy myers dude and i'm taking it's complicated i've never seen it i've never seen meryl streep alec baldwin steve martin it's fucking fantastic uh there's other amazing nancy myers movies but i can only take one just because there's so many good ones it's uh meryl streep and alec baldwin used to be like married and they had kids together and then

they got divorced but now one of their kids is graduating and uh oh do they do they maybe do things maybe spark back up do they maybe spark back up the supporting characters are fantastic uh who's the guy from the office who played jim halpert uh john krasinski krasinski's in it and like you know how people are like now like jim from the office was evil like that's a take that a lot of people like to do now. He's pure and good and completely wonderful in this and so charming. Is that a take people do? Oh, yeah. But yeah, it's complicated.

It's great. She owns a bakery in Santa Barbara. So like you get lots of great bakery shots. It's just like beautiful. It's cozy. If you want to nestle in with a white wine or maybe even a rosé and you're looking for something to watch, it's just like beautiful it's cozy if you want to nestle in with a white wine or maybe even a rose and you're looking for something to watch it's complicated it's going to get you there fantastic it's not complicated it's complicated that's right that's 100 right hey it's not

complicated it's complicated david time for your final pick easy pe peasy, lemon squeezy. I just always thought this movie was funny, and I don't think about it as a rom-com, but it totally is. I'm picking Coming to America. Coming to America! Yeah. Sure. Yeah, yeah.

That's a solid choice. I never even thought about it, but yeah. It's your classic fish-out-of-water rom-com. Mm-hmm. It's hilarious. It has Samuel L. Jacksonson and for some reason cuba gooding jr for some reason no he doesn't have any lines is why he's just an extra in it yeah sam jackson's got a little partiz the guy yeah yeah yeah and uh yeah it's just eddie murphy

murph and off the royal penis is clean your highness you know what i mean sure yeah it's just a fun movie. Hell yeah, good call. It's interesting. Some of these, this is not a critique, so please don't take it like this. And it's not a viewer pick. It's of a lot of things.

Some of these are hard rom-coms and some of these are soft rom-coms. You know what I mean? I deliberately chose a fucked up one to make you mad. Well, Ambrose is not a rom-com, but I think Clueless is like a soft rom-com and Coming to America is like a soft rom-com. Because some of them are just more funny movies that also happen to be about romance.

Right. Which happens sometimes. Sean, time for your final pick. My last pick, I'm just going to go true to me. It's one of my favorite movies and I don't think a lot of people have seen it. It's The Five Year Engagement. I've seen it. I've never seen it.

It's really funny. Is that with Jack Blacks? Jack's Blacks? No, it's i've never seen it really funny jack blacks jack jack's blacks no it's jason siegel and emily blunt are a couple and they get engaged and then they have to postpone the wedding because she gets like an internship which turns into like a residency or not a residency but a career at this place as a i think an architect or no she's a psychologist always architect yeah or work for magazines it's uh it's just really good he has to move to michigan or wisconsin i can't remember which brian posain and kevin hart are both in it they have little cameos but it's just a good one if you're sitting

inside and you want a recommendation trust me it's very good if you don't like it then uh send me a message on instagram we'll talk about it it'll be a fun little conversation what if you're sitting outside dude uh then you can kick rocks i don't really care what happens fuck yeah that's where the rocks are the five-year engagement i haven't seen it it is on the list great it's very good it is on the list that wraps up the draft we left so many a recap before we get to the board miel you went first you took when har Harry met Sally, Moonstruck, Forgetting Sarah Marshall, Clueless, and then In Bruges.

I stand by it. Fuck you all. In Bruges. If Mel Kiper gives you a bad pick or a bad score, then he's just not got galaxy brain. That's fine. Not everyone can think I'm 3008. I get it. I went second. I amy hall nodding hill you've got mail my best friend's wedding and it's complicated i mean talk about the 1927 yankees

that is a murderer's row right there that david you went third you took hitch along came polly knocked up the wood and coming to america i mean that's a fucking weekend sean you went last you took crazy stupid love 500 days of summer gross Gross Point Blank, High Fidelity, and The Five Year Engagement. Yeah. A lot of Cusack, but good movies. I love it. And I was going to pick Serendipity, which is another Cusack joint, and also Better Off

Dead and Say Anything. Those are all Cusack joints, and they're all killer. Yeah. The two that I cannot believe are still here. Yeah. 10 Things I Hate About You. Yeah. Yes. Princess Bride. Sure. Oh. 10 Things I Hate About You. Yeah. Yes.

Princess Bride. Sure. Oh. That's crazy to me. Is that a rom-com? I mean, the whole thing's a com, and it revolves around a rom. It's all about rom, yeah.

Isn't it a rom fan? Like a fantasy rom? I think it's sometimes, I think sometimes when there's a lot of com, we forget about the rom, but it's still, but that movie's based about, it's about rom.

I guess I, I think I have, and maybe it's just because i've been watching so many of like so many hard rom-coms recently i think i have like a more strict definition i don't know what is your definition a lot of comms you know what i mean like there's there's romance and in knocked up you know what i mean or not knocked up my bad i mean in uh in the hangover so if it's a rom first and foremost and then the calm that's your definition you can't be calm i think there's some calm roms on here does it have to be about the relationship that's what i feel like it makes it i feel like it needs to revolve around a relationship for sure princess bride makes that cut i guess so that's what i mean yeah i guess so but cluel what I mean. Yeah, I guess so. But Clueless does not.

Right. But also, it's so good. Clueless does not. Clueless doesn't have like a... Also, wait, have you seen Baby Boom?

No. Baby Boom is so fun. Is it Diane Keaton? Diane Keaton. Old Diane Keaton, right? Yeah. It's so weird and silly and you have to see it.

It's terrible. It's the best. We left four weddings and a funeral on the board, which is like... About a boy. It's so weird and silly and you have to see it. It's terrible. It's the best. We left four weddings and a funeral on the board, which is like- About a boy. Fucking amazing movie. Something's got to give. Another Nancy Meyers.

The Holiday. Splash. Oh, The Holiday. As good as it gets. Oh, as good as it gets. One of us is good. The Holiday is really good. That's a good call with Jack Black and Cameron Diaz.

Cameron Diaz and fucking Jude Law, dude. Jude Law, Kate Winslet. good that's a good call with jack black and cameron diaz cameron diaz and fucking jude law dude jude law kate winslet and uh i had booty call because it's a one night no some of the best movies take place in one night you know what i mean where it's just like beginning to end and then we end up being also like set it up was pretty fun set it up was good i loved it always be my maybe it was great all the boys i Boys I Loved Before. Yeah. Was so good. Sleepless in Seattle. My favorite movie, I think ever, is teetering on rom-com, but I didn't include it because I think it fits more into rom-com drama. Yeah.

I think it's more. Is it Arachnophobia? It's Arachnophobia with David Arquette. No, that's Eight-Legged Freak. Sorry. It's Beginners. Have you guys seen Beginners? No.

No. Highly suggest that one if you like the rom-com genre. Oh, Singles. Singles is great. Matt Dillon. Singles would have been good. I didn't even put it on my list.

Breakfast at Tiffany's, Pretty Woman, The Apartment, like amazing movies. Pretty in Pink. There's so many that are so like etched in the Hall of Fame that you don't even think,

like that I didn't even think about when I went to make the, you know what I mean? They're like,ched in the Hall of Fame that you don't even think like that. I didn't even think about when I went to make the you know what I mean? Yeah, like obviously in Bruges we got at the top of the list, but then I didn't even think to put it down, which is crazy. Our friends movie The Big Sick, which is also drawn, but for sure.

Hell yeah. Well, we want to hear yours all family hit us up at all fantasy pod on Twitter. AllFantasyPodcast at gmail.com. Shout out to everyone on the AFE subreddit. Shout out to everyone on the AFE Patreon holding us down. Thank you so much.

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