All Fantasy Everything - Songs to STOP a Dance Floor at a Wedding (w/ Katie Nolan, David Gborie, Sean Jordan)

Episode Date: November 10, 2022

Nolvember is a special time! And with that comes special drafts! This week we’re drafting “Songs To STOP A Dance Floor at a Wedding!” We’ve had this idea brewing for a while now and couldn’t have a better guest for it!  Seattle! Boston! New York! We're recording a live episode in your city! Get tickets at linktr.ee/allfantasyeverything. Guest: Katie Nolan @katienolan IG: @natiekolan Support the show! Join the All Fantasy Everything Patreon for ad-free episodes, mailbags, and video pre-rolls. Check it all out at www.patreon.com/AllFantasy. Follow the Good Vibes Gang on social media: Ian Karmel @IanKarmel IG: @IanKarmel Sean Jordan @SeanSJordan IG: @SeancougarmelonJordan David Gborie IG: @Coolguyjokes87 Mars Mel @MarsMel IG: @Mars.Mel Show Email: [e-mail] omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

This is a HeadGum Podcast. This is all Fantasy Everything, the podcast where we fantasy draft anything and everything from the world of pop culture. On today's episode, we're drafting songs to stop a dance floor at a wedding. Continuing the month of November is our dear friend, our dear friend, commentator on Apple TV's Friday Night Baseball,

Emmy Award winner, former Guinness World Records holder, and the newly engaged, Katie Nolan. I'm your host, Ian Carmel, and joining me as always are my friends and comedians, Sean Jordan and David Borey. Let's get into it. Welcome to another brand new episode of All Fantasy Everything. Brought to you by the Pew Charitable Trust and people like you. I don't know how far back you'd have to go to get that. What? People like you? Viewers like you. I guess listeners like you i don't know how far back you'd have to go to get that what people like you viewers like you i guess listeners like you and listeners like you no i mean just a mellow like welcome uh a

mellow welcome uh we'll take actually we're not drinking tonight so i'll actually take a two sparkling waters and a mellow welcome please yeah. Yeah. Make the next Citywide's. I want to be tea. Citywide's, but tea. I had a mocktail. I went to dinner the other day, and I had a mocktail. And if you go to the right restaurant, you get a fucking mocktail that really kicks. It was awesome.

It really knocks your socks off. It mocks my socks off. The liquor is the grossest part about the whole tail. Yeah, liquor doesn't taste good man should be the easiest thing to make it's you don't have to hide anything oh you just get hibiscus and simple syrup yeah that's delicious this thing had like ginger and melon all this other stuff shout out to here's looking at you in los angeles great restaurant and we go now to ian carmel for a review of here's looking at you

an up-and-coming farm-to-table California-style restaurant that recently won acclaim from the New York California-style. I don't know what to call it where it's like, here's a sea bass. What is that? Sea-to-table. Ocean-to-table.

I feel like those places are like California-style, like farm-to-table. I went to a farm a table down the street for me the other day and it was it was amazing yeah i don't think we have those in south dakota well we actually probably have tons of those but they're just they got farm in south dakota it's a table that they struggle in you just eat it off a tupperware lid farm to trash can lid outside of a livestock auction yeah trough farm to trough there was it's yeah it's a short short little walk farm to trough god barack obama won't stop emailing me dog it's getting insane it's insane

i don't even know where i gave them my email i never gave them my phone number they text me they text me yeah They text me. Yeah. Like, Katie. And it pops up as like, oh, this must be someone I... And then you open it, you're like, I don't know this person. I don't know this person. Some of them are getting really, really strong as far as their wording.

Yeah. They talk to you like they're your friend. Recently, one I got was like, this is bullshit. And I was like like wait a second whoa you give them guilt tripping too they're like you're not we emailed you 15 times and you're not gonna give us five dollars to save democracy that's like wikipedia when it asks and you're like okay you're right i do use you a lot but i also donate every time you ask and i feel like you've started to ask like every three weeks. And look, I get it.

Times are tough. But like, don't guilt trip me. I'm the one giving. Hit up the people that aren't giving at all. Yeah. We're not like I'm looking up what kind of car Dracula drives. It's not that serious. It's kind of urgent.

I can't scroll through the six paragraphs of you begging me. I mean, honestly. No, just a desperate Swedish guy hitting you up hard for money. What is Dracula Drive? Hey, hold on. me i mean honestly no just a desperate swedish guy hitting you up hard for money what does dracula drive hey uh now hold on i got one if you don't if i could fly i don't know that i'd be driving too many places now wait now wait a minute uh uh now hold on now come on keep now wait a minute what is dracula drive Dracula drive? What does he drive? Does he drive the blood mobile?

I mean, imagine if he took this long to think of that. Imagine if that's what he came with after two minutes. Come on, dude. He drives a... What does Dracula drive? You're coming to me? I have one immediately. Come on, man.

Yeah. What is it? Where is it? What was it? Lamborghini. Oh, that was pretty good. Yeah, he's not a ghost,'s dead he's not a ghost though he's a living he's the living dead he might drive a fang rari maybe okay okay i feel like we're getting closer uh he drives a uh what is what is dracula drive it's funny you should ask he drives a, what is Dracula drive?

It's funny, you should ask. He drives a screamer. A Z3. I'm laughing so hard that I can't even get the answer out. What Dracula drives? Tune in next week to find out what Dracula drives. Sean S. Jordan is here. Sean Cougar Melvin on Instagram.

Next episode, we will drop what car Dracula drives for the loyal listeners. Is it the Batmobile? No. Jeez Louise. That's okay. Batman drives that. I mean, you know, you don't know what he's doing when he's not Batman. What if he was Dracula? I think we do know what he's

doing when he's not Batman. He's like being a businessman. Isn't he a playboy of some sort yeah a billionaire playboy philanthropist i believe but yeah your pitch of what if batman was dracula does sound like a comic book series sure oh like the watcher what if conan fought the avengers yeah yeah what if batman was dracula that's patent pending all fantasy everything just for everyone out there can't have that and i guess dc comics as well yeah that dcu that dcu is struggling right now the dc universe dcd's nuts got him hit him he hit that one quick that's what dracula drives These CDs nuts. This dick, dude. Sean Jordan. Man, I'm excited.

I watched three kids last night. I am. Anything's better than that. I feel like I'm moving slow this morning. This has been a busy. I was like an actual parent for a while. Yeah. But I'm very excited.

I will be also opening for all my friends coming up november 18th rev hall i'll be with uh kyle canane december 2nd and 3rd cobs comedy club san francisco i'll be with david borey december 4th november 18th at rev hall you will be with ian carmel yeah what did i say kyle canane did i november 11th kyle canane will be with us in seattle washington at Crocodile. That's tomorrow. Tomorrow. That's what I was getting at. Tomorrow. Tomorrow night.

I'm driving Kyle's punk ass up from Portland. It's going to be a blast. Nick Nampay's coming. Some other people from Portland are coming. Some friends. It'll be fun. Anyway, catch me out there with my buddies doing stand-up. It'll be fun.

And also, shout out to everybody that came to Albany, Oregon the other night for a show. Didn't see that happening. So so thank you for showing up thank you for the fruitcake mountain dew which david i gotta tell you man it's good it's raspberry mountain dew i'm sure it is no what if i said raspberry mountain dew would you think it was good you think flaming hot yes it's good so i don't have any i think it's taller flaming hot mountain. That exists? It wasn't good. It does exist. Not only does it exist, it is presently in the cells of one Sean Jordan that is helping him operate. Yeah, you

don't just pee that out. You absorb it. I chugged a 20-ouncer on here a while back. Oh my, you chugged it? You didn't puke from that? Strong constitution. Pat Jordan didn't give me much, but he gave me a strong constitution. I will say that might be the way to get rid of all the microplastics that are in our bodies.

Just chugging. Yeah, but that's going to show up on a hair fall test if you need to take one of those anytime soon. You've got to shave your shit. If you don't want to know that you drank Flamin' Hot Mountain Dew, you've got to shave all your shit off. Yeah, that's a non-starter for me if I were hiring, so just careful. Yeah, you tested positive

for cocaine, which is who doesn't like to party but your mountain dew red cells are that's a real problem for me your mountain dew red cells are you drinking a spicy soda i can't i don't like i don't like chip flavored beverages it was odd for sure i'll tell you throw some tequila in there you got yourself like uh no you don't no no you don't you want you to finish i'll tell you, throw some tequila in there. You got yourself like a... No, you don't. No, you don't. You got me if you want me to finish. I'll tell you, you don't have it. You got yourself something. You don't have it.

You got yourself a real mess. You have yourself an even bigger problem. You got yourself a spicy hangover. You got yourself a custody hearing in a few weeks. That's what you got. You got yourself two weeks in county. Max, I'll tell you what happened when you're 18. You got yourself a repossessed jet skis what you got oh you got yourself an entire outfit purchased at lids i

can keep going what if lids what if you just could get sweatpants like lids sweatpants you can you can all on the website the one in the mall of america they have like eight lids and one of them doesn't sell hats it just sells the other stuff whoa that's a crazy i don't know i like a long conversation with the person working there about it and they're like lady you don't think we've heard this before just go to the other lids he was like ma'am i'm 17 yeah i was like you gotta let me get this off my chest you have to see that i'm i'm in my 30s and i've never experienced this you gotta let me get this off my chest. You have to see that I'm in my 30s and I've never experienced this. You gotta let me air this out. Can't take this with me.

That's not the level of customer service I've come to expect from Linz. That's right. Yeah. I almost blew mine. Hey! You know? Thumbs up.

There it is. That's why they pay her the big bucks, y'all. There it is right there. You hear that, Apple? Swanging. Cool Guy Jokes 87 on Instagram. Not on Twitter. Never.

He sessed up this Elon Musk situation about a year and a half out. I can smell the rumblings. Twitter is the worst. Is it going bad? It seems like it's probably going kind of rough right now. It's not going well. On a lot of fronts. It's a nightmare.

It's bad. I haven't noticed. It's been the well. On a lot of fronts. It's a nightmare. It's bad. I haven't noticed. It's been the same for me. It's always been kind of a nightmare, except yesterday I pretended to be Kyrie Irving. I saw that and it worked on me. Can I say it worked on me for.02 seconds? Me too.

What? That's fun. It was the Woody Allen one for me. Mine was the one where you did the math equation. I was like, what is he talking? I i read it and i go there's no what and then yeah yeah that beautiful one interesting thing about twitter is that you can you can seem like someone else for a second until you do a little research usually there's supposed to be consequences like i have a i have a blue check mark from when i invented the color orange in the 1970s.

Looked at the fruit and said, you know what? Call it the same. Hugely failed sequel to the color purple. Everybody was like, what are you talking about, the Knicks? It's the only movie to not make any money. It made no money. Zero at the box office. It didn't lose money.

It didn't lose money. It didn't make any. We made exactly our budget back. They're supposed to suspend you if you change your, if you have a blue check mark and you change your name to someone else and impersonate them.

But so far, so good. Did you pay the $8 a month and that way you can do whatever you want? Oh, I saw that on the news. I don't want to talk about Twitter. I think that starts Monday. It does? It's starting that quickly? I'm quickly i'm not doing it that's what i heard

but i'm gonna lose access to my twitter if i don't do it no no no i just lose my check mark i guess so oh wait i thought you well i never got to pay to keep it it's like ransom that's crazy crazy but he thinks it's a good idea. And in him, we trust. I don't know. We love it. The only good thing about Twitter is they keep suspending Mike Malloy. So I'm, you know. Now that we can agree on.

That's for the best. That's good. That is pretty funny a bit. That's a good bit. A broken clock. I'd pay eight bucks a month for that. Oh, my God. That's how we should raise money is like you can get other people suspended just for a

couple of days. If you raise enough money, you can take away someone's account for a week. Oh, my God. Just in a fun way. As a goof. God, that'd be if you just paid $100 and took Mike's account away for seven days that you choose over the next month. He can just, like a hot day, be like, you don't get Twitter today, Mike. If they had that feature, I'd still live in an apartment.

Oh, that'd be fun shout out to apartments david where can people see you oh they can see me with sean jordan on december 4th at helium comedy club come out it's going to be so much fun december 3rd i'm going to be at the hereafter in seattle the hereafter is also fun it's the hereafter yeah that's the one uh oh this oh tomorrow when does this come out next week tomorrow we'll be at the uh crocodile oh tomorrow we'll be at the crocodile with kyle can and it'll be great everything else is on my instagram just you know come see me or don't you know the act is in a very strange place right now is it it was in a it was in a sturdy and mighty place the last time i saw it well you know we're always expanding you know what i mean cutting the fat and adding universe never stops no no no it's it's uh if you want to feel stuff come see my act right now. Okay, I like that pitch.

I feel mixed bag about it, but it's interesting. It's a fucking interesting act right now. When you say feel stuff, you mean you tell everybody to close their eyes and you pass around a bowl of spaghetti and say this was her brains, right? Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. Why can't we do that as stand-up comedians you could we can you just don't have the balls

you're just too scared we can do whatever we want can we just do a five minute thing where we have everyone do that like preschool thing where they rub their hands together to make a rainstorm and then they snap and like all that come on what i've been doing is i pull i pull people on stage and crack an egg on their head. And their yoke is running down. And their yoke is running down. Did you ever do the thing where you stand and touch the wall and then rub your forearm a bunch and then try to touch the wall again and your arm can't touch it? No, I don't. You ever do that?

Some South Dakota shit. Like shrink your arm? That's like how they. I'm serious. We did it when we would stand. You'd touch the wall like with your fingertips and then rub on your forearm for like 30 seconds and then try to touch the wall again and you can't touch it.

And I'm sure it's something where your arm is pushing your shoulder back and you just don't know it. Yeah, I said it. Rub on your forearm. South Dakota learning disability test or something. What about the portables? You can't touch the wall. Did you guys ever faint each other? did you had to have done that david pass each other out i was on the news i never did it but i was around it a lot i i that scared me that always me too

did you say you were on the news for that i was it's not it's my least proud moment i think i live across from the middle i lived across from the middle school and so whenever there was like a concerned and then and the news would come the house that was right there was mine and so they asked if i wanted to be on the news to talk about the thing happening at my school where people were making each other pass out in the i forgot what they called it i feel like it was just the pass out game or the it was not creative we were fainting each other we faint each other and there's me with like this bright purple eyeshadow because i had that short little haircut and i was in my era of like don't ask i'm a girl and so i had this like crazy eyeshadow on and like a choker necklace

and i'm like yeah it's very scary people are just like passing out in the bathroom and now i'm like you snitch why did you say anything just say i don't know just say i don't know what you're talking about is that footage anywhere probably oh probably someone do a little digging please katie nolan gifts will have it in three seconds just give them a second this drops katie nolan out here the the trend of flatlining yeah i was a little snitch and then i'm like why is nobody my friend well keep your mouth shut katie nolan gifts is they're quick very they've tweeted pictures at me that i'm like, why is nobody my friend? Well, keep your mouth shut. Katie Nolan Gifts is, they're quick. Very. They've tweeted pictures at me that I'm like, oh, what's that from?

Yeah. They're me. They're pictures of me. Oh, that sounds terrible. There's like any topic. I'll be like, ooh, I've been thinking about making a beef Wellington. And then there'll be a picture of you like pulling a beef Wellington out of an oven. Not photoshopped.

Take it from the window of your kitchen. It's my external hard drive. He's like my memory he or she is my memory that exists completely outside of my own memory. Then I'm like, oh, thank you for reminding me. If I forget something about myself, I just ask them. If we could make a book on the he or she

what are we putting? I'm going to take he or she. We don, what are we putting? I'm going to say he. We don't know who it is. I'm going to guess it's a he. But a kind he. At least an appropriate he. A not inappropriate he. I appreciate. A not at all obsessed he.

I'm a fan of the he. What if he doesn't even listen to this? What if he's just like, I don't even. My gift game is nice. Sorry. What if he gets his Katie Nolan information from somebody else who doesn't use the internet that I don't even know exists that just passes it on and he's just a secondhand. That would be pretty wild.

He's just screaming into his microphone right now. It's GIFs. Katie Nolan's GIFs. It is. I know it is, but I'm always going to say GIFs till I die. Oh, I say GIF too. Same. GIF boys. I don't know if it was GIFs until like a year ago. Ah, fuck it. It's GIFs It is I know it is But I'm always gonna say GIFs Till I die Oh I say GIF too Same GIF boys

I don't know it was GIFs Till like a year ago Ah fuck it It's GIF Yeah Eat my ass Guy who invented it Katie Nolan is here

At Katie Nolan On Twitter At Naty Colon On Instagram What she did See what I did What she did She switched

The first letter of each name. Whoop, whoop. Swapped them around. Hello. How, how. How can they see me? They can't. They can't.

They can't see me. Don't even try. Quick update. Oh, we're divorced. Nice. Nice. And it's been a while since we recorded last. So the engagement off.

We actually got married and then we're like, this was a dumb idea. I'll buy every word of that. No, we're good. I'm still at the era of like, I just still look down at my hand and go like, oh my God. Last night we went to see Nate Bargetzi. You should go see him. It's very funny. It's his new act.

And he introduced me as his fiance a bunch of times. Not Nate. Dan did. But it was the first time we'd been out and he was like, this is my fiance. And I was like, oh, charmed. How about it? How'd it feel?

It was great. I met Ben Bailey as Dan Soder's fiance. And I was like, Cash Cab. Cash Cab's Ben Bailey. There's a lot of Cash Cab. He was like, I'm a standup comedian. He did. I didn't actually, it was one of those things that I'm like, I bet he hears this all the time, so I'm not gonna say anything. There's a lot of Cash Cab. He was like, I'm a stand-up comedian. He did. I didn't actually.

It was one of those things that I'm like, I bet he hears this all the time, so I'm not going to say anything. But in the back of my mind, there were just all those sound effects and lights every time he was talking. Yeah. You can call me Cash Cab, dude. As long as I have my own show, call me whatever that show is. I'm into it.

Yeah. Good point. They call me Lizzo's Big Girls. With five R's. those big girls with five hours uh my name is ian carmel at ian carmel on twitter at ian carmel on instagram at ian carmel on uh jewish uh where can you see me? Tonight, if you live in Los Angeles, I will be at Dynasty Typewriter at 10 p.m. tonight running a bunch of new material, kind of putting the hour together

in preparation for dates later that I won't mention. But so tonight, Dynasty Typewriter in Los Angeles. Tomorrow, The Crocodile, 7 p.m. in Seattle, Washington. Live all day and see everything with Kyle Kinane. Some tickets still available at the time of recording. We'd love to sell it out. I think we will.

Sell it out. I think we're going to go ahead and do it. I think we're going to go ahead and do it. And then the next weekend, November 18th, I will be at Revolution Hall doing an hour of stand-up comedy. Sean Jordan will be there. Some other special guests will be there. It's going to be a really great time.

We're going to have a lot of fun. We're going to have a lot of laughs. The 20th, AFE sold out at Revolution Hall. Sorry, you blew it. It's going to be 800 people. I mean, the 800 of you listening who bought tickets, you didn't blow it. No, you didn't blow it at all.

Thank you so much. 800 people in one place it's crazy it's crazy 5 it's crazy how many does Ivan count as 10 people he'll be in the green room for sure

so he won't even be we've already talked about that he's already talked about it he's like I bought my ticket but you gotta get me back in the green room for sure. So he won't even be. He's not going to be in the way. We've already talked about that. He's already talked about it. He's like, I bought my ticket, but you got to get me back in the green room. You'll be there. Dude, it's going to be. And I miss you. It's going to be really fun.

I miss you. I miss you. A lot. Oh, God. A whole lot. I'll see you in seven days. I know. I miss you, though, man.

I really do. I really honestly. When's the last time you saw each other? Not that long ago. DC. Yeah. Now Minneapolis. I miss you, though, man. I really do. When's the last time you saw each other? Not that long ago. The D.C. Yeah. Now Minneapolis. Minneapolis.

And Dave and I got to go to a Vikings game in a murdered out limo. I mean, we've been doing some fun shit, man. This is just fun. Been having a good one. They were playing. Were they playing Sister Christian? Yeah, they were playing Sister Christian. Yeah.

Please don't ask us dumb questions like that. Turn it up. And then he leans in. Louder. Yeah. All the way up us dumb questions like that. Turn it up and then he leans in. Louder. Yeah. All the way up. That was crazy. Anyway.

December 15th, we will be at Wilbur, the Wilbur Hall. Is it Wilbur Hall or Wilbur Theater? I don't know. It's Wilbur Theater. Yeah. In Boston, Massachusetts. A couple tickets available still. We'll be at the Wilbur.

Wow. There's a few still available. There's a few still available. You ever see Bill Burr at the Wilbur? Bill Burr at the Wilbur. Wow. There's a few still available. There's a few still available. You ever see Bill Burr at the Wilbur? Bill Burr at the Wilbur? He'll be there. Bill Burr will be at the Wilbur. Not with us.

But at some point. At some point. Yeah, at some point. I bet he's at Wilbur. I imagine he'll be there. Yeah, we'll be there. Yeah. Kevin Garnett is going to be at the Wilbur.

At some point. Or at least, you know, with us. Not with us, but he will have walked by there at some point. The majority of new addition because they're yeah all of them they're from Boston they'll actually be there that day yeah we'll be there they're on stage with no Michael Bivens and me

we tweet you don't we tweet on my burner I got a I got a burner just for Michael Bivens makes sense we will have a very Boston guest at that show we will a duncan donuts coffee loving positive ben affleck it's baffling it's baffling it's ben affleck matt damon's gonna be on the stage solving math equations it's gonna be crazy you're gonna want to get tickets uh and then the

next night we will be at the bell house in Brooklyn. First show sold out already. Second show featuring Katie Dolan. Tickets still available but going. What the hell is that about guys? Extreme. Well I will say this tickets once we announced that you were at that second show. Because we said you were going to do it. If we were just doing one show you would have been the guest on that one

show. Thank you. We moved you to the second one because we want to keep hanging out after the show is over. Yeah. Tickets have skyrocketed. I i bet once we announced that you were the guest there hell yeah second guest diddy as the joker what's he doing it's my favorite thing to happen this year he's i love you did you did you see Diddy as the Joker I saw one video of him cause you know I got engaged

I've been very busy I saw one video of him like fighting with somebody no that's not that's not the best one to watch I'll send you some

I don't I thought you were kidding Diddy he dressed up like the Joker it looks like him you missed it I dropped him in the thread you

which thread which thread no you did not we had hilarious jokes I copied the thread. You? Which thread? Oh, there was a thread there. No, you did not. We had hilarious jokes. No, you did not. Are you kidding me? We can do this off.

I was surprised you weren't talking about it. No, I didn't see it at all. Hashtag I stand with Kyrie is trending. What's happening? No, it isn't. Yes, it is. I'm going to quit Twitter. Get off of there.

You got to leave that neighborhood. I don't ever look at it gotta leave that neighbor i don't ever look at it i never i don't i look at it it's on instagram oh god darn it look at that sj whoa dc for cool guy jokes 87 whoa you put it in an instant wait yeah dude it's it's all in there's one of him scaring tyler the creator there's one of him hanging out of a cop car i do i not see that i i just dropped it in the chat with all the good stuff I always look at I can't believe you haven't seen this

this is fucked up man we were talking about this on the thread it's in the chat and it's amazing there's a chance that he's one of our generation's greatest actors and it just doesn't make economic sense for him to act all the time he was funny in get him to the Greek

it was hilarious in get him to the Greek. Wasn't he in that? He was hilarious in Get Him to the Greek. He's multi-talented. He also ran track in college. Yeah. He was also really funny in a serious way in The Defiant Ones when they were interviewing him about the Source Awards night. The way he talked about it in the interview,

he was just hilarious. He just seems way cooler than people gave him credit for in the interview he was just hilarious uh he just seems like he seems way cooler than people gave him credit for in the beginning i don't know i think people give him pretty a lot of credit for being maybe we didn't maybe i didn't give him the credit and the people maybe he got a little bit more credit than he should have in other parts of his life that now it's like evening out i don't know that could be someone's theory i think he's a notorious cool guy have you when's the last time you listened to his song from um that godzilla remake you can hate me now that one nope that's not come with me

donna it's the cashmere like a lot of people didn't like a new generation that didn't know cashmere thought it was a great song and then realized that it his additions to it really probably weren't great we're not all gonna sit here like everything's a home run. That's not fair. That's not fair. That's fair. We will be hitting fucking dingers at the Wilbur Theater on December 15th, though. There we go. With our guest, Big Papi himself.

John. John Jordan. Everyone's been calling me Big Papi himself for years now. Years. He's going to be up there hitting dingers. I did a show with David Ortiz once. Big watch. Oh, you were going to say head.

Big head. Big watch. Big watch. David Ortiz, big watch. Big watch. You can tell what time it is across the room. Every time. It's all the time.

That watch. If that, if that watch was a plate at a buffet, they'd go out of business in a week. You know what I mean? It's a big watch, big watch. And you should big watch us do all fantasy,

everything live. I got it. There you go. I got it. December 15th at the Wilbur theater, December 16th at the Bell House in Brooklyn. Some tickets still available, but very few. Make sure you jump on that.

Very few. Now, we're gathered here today not to promote our upcoming tour dates, but in honor of Katie Nolan's becoming effianced, her nuptials, we are doing a sequel podcast. Two years ago or something like that maybe even three we did songs to get a dance floor going at the wedding with the universally beloved 100 approval rating james corden it was like four years ago dude it was four years ago it was when we were still doing i'd still live in la yeah we were way before we went to his office and it was like oh weird we're

not in the studio yeah that's true it was way before i was on the late late show with james corn doing stand-up comedy which i did that's true well that's true it was it was years way before that you did that with my unjustly maligned dear friend the incredibly talented james i'm serious i don't know i know you are i just don't know how to. I couldn't use maligned. I didn't even know it was a word. Fuck. I just don't. I will talk about it.

But this goes. It's a lot. Probably a lot. This is public. Yeah. Fucking the Internet is fucking. Anyway. So songs to get a dance floor to one.

Sean and I or somebody. I forget who had this idea, but we thought it was funny maybe it was a listener who said songs to clear a dance floor we were driving around one day listening to something obnoxious and one of us was like we should something about like songs to stop the dance floor and it was there you have it it was Ricky Gervais who came up with it originally we

songs to clear a dance floor at a wedding it's a very funny idea so we've done songs to get a dance floor going a wedding. It's a very funny idea. So we've done songs to get a dance floor going at a wedding. Today we're going to draft songs that would absolutely shut down a dance floor at a wedding. Now the way we determine the order. A Chevy Impaler.

Oh! I saw you think of that. I saw you think of it and I was like, what's wrong with what Ian just said? And you were just going, I thought of it. Oh no, David thought we were drafting songs that are good for a dance he's just realizing but no it was a stroke of genius no i googled it what you googled what is dracula drive yeah i thought we were holding it until the next no no i looked at i looked it up i was gonna i was gonna go what you think it is baby because i knew it was on a popsicle stick somewhere it was driving me nuts I'm sorry continue that's good

rollicking game of rock paper scissors play between the three of you and we throw on shoot here we go rock paper scissors shoot again he wins the same way I think every time we throw scissors and he throws paper and I can never remember what he throws because paper should never beat scissors

it should always be scissors let's not dissect the song bro baby david borey unprecedented winning percentage uh david has the winner of rock paper scissors is it coming up on you serpentine draft and what is that it's a great question i got a caramel macchiato today and they asked if i wanted a little the drizzled caramel on it on the whipped cream and uh no it's actually pronounced caramel caramel i and i and caramel actually caramel what would you do if somebody knew your name was pronouncing caramel and they went to school with you how many times would it take them calling you i and caramel

before they got a chin check i am the weirder one i feel like i am is weird i kick them like a mule right off the bat the first time they did it. You turn around, hands on the ground, mule kick them? I only know Iron Zyrin. Yeah, I did. Iron Eagle. Iron Eagle, too. Two guys who are wrong. Drizzling the caramel syrup on your whipped cream on the macchiato.

You start top left, go to the right, down a little bit, over to the left. You just drizzle. And then your macchiato is complete. And you can finish walking around the mall like the good lord intended you to do on a on a day like today well there you have it doesn't get any more clear than that but just in case you need further instruction that means you draft fourth in the first round you pick first in the second round now david with that in mind what will the order of today's draft be david katie sean ian david katie sean Sean Ian got the hot corner David boy you have the first pick in the songs

to stop the dance floor at a wedding all fantasy everything draft and we will get to that first pick right after you guessed it this short break this episode of all fantasy everything is brought to you by schedule 35 now microdosing is an absolute

game changer. I have never heard a bad word about it. And like we said, this episode of All Fantasy Everything is brought to you by Schedule 35, our partner in getting things done. Imagine if you could, let me just take you on a walk. You got a tool, sharpens your focus. It's gonna clear your mind up. It's gonna keep your anxiety at bay,

which, man, wouldn't that be nice? And it's going to do it all day long. It's like a Swiss army knife for your mind. Might sound like a magic pill. I know I said it before, but that's, I swear to God, it's the plot of Limitless. It might sound like that, but you can actually get it done. There's the magic of microdosing with Schedule 35. Their products, they're backed by science and dosed to a precise amount so you get exactly what you need to tackle your toughest days. And you don't get the hallucinogenic effects. I feel like there's a lot of stigma attached with things like this. But Schedule 35, they're on a mission to de-stigmatize and educate on the science and real-world benefits of

psilocybin, of which there are a ton. And they also want to make it accessible for everyone. Each order ships discreetly. No one's going to get in your business. No one's going to be in your kitchen stirring your Kool-Aid. It just comes in a nice little box. And it comes with a microdosing regime that keeps you on track. So you start small. I think that's the key to this. You start small and just let it ride. I know so many people do it. So, so, so many people do it. I don't think you're going to be disappointed. I strongly advise you give it a shot. And if you do, you get 15% off with code all fantasy at schedule 35.co. That's 15% off at schedule 35.co and use promo code all fantasy. And we're back. Welcome back to an all fantasy everything already in progress brought to you by uh knopf mcmillan publishers and smith t um unless that conflicts with one of our actual

sponsors in which case that that's who we're brought to you by them whoever i just whoever sean just talked about. It could be Trade Coffee and BetterHelp maybe brought you this. Who knows? Who's to say? Brought to you, welcome back to All Fantasy Everything, already in progress, brought to you by BetterHelp. BetterHelp? Or Policy Genius.

It could be Policy Genius. Policy Genius. Any of these people. Hold on one second. Welcome back to All Fantasy Everything, brought to you by Dracula's Car. Which is? The Chevy Impala. Was that your Dracula?

What was that? What was that? Here are the keys. Park my Chevy Impala. Impala? What's happening between the A and the L? Did Dracula have like a 30-year boxing career? Do your best Dracula real quick.

I'll do my best Dracula. I want to suck your blood. I want to suck your blood. Here's my Chevy Impala. Yeah, that was better. Not bad. Yours was very rocky I felt like but I liked it.

Somebody park my Chevy Impala. That's what he felt like that like pugilistic dementia opening for arcade fire uh david boar you have the first pick in these songs to clear dance forward a wedding so i've seen this one happen before and listen you guys you djs out there you gotta know on these viral popular songs you can do it the year of after that nobody wants to dance to that shit anymore and it's just like oh i'm gonna go get a macaroon i'm picking gangnam style game style. Whoa. Good pick. Wopan Gangnam Style. Gangnam Style.

Wopan Gangnam Style. I hate it when that shit comes on now. It's an irritating song. We had the time. It was fun. Now it's like, oh, fuck, it's annoying. It does just bum you out where you're like, God, I was having such a good time. I was having, you were taking it back to the 90s, the 80s, and beyond, and then you hit me with this shit?

This shit? I'm telling you to go get a drink. I swear to God, when that happens, you're like, all right, so I should go to the bathroom now. Yeah, I've had to pee for the past six songs. He was killing it. You know what I mean? All heroes fall.

I just, it's like, and and every i've seen it happen multiple times and the dj is always too into it like you can tell no with the arms up yeah he thinks he's hitting a move like yeah i'm gonna get him with the well that's the so my buddy andy got married and he had a playlist he let everybody at the wedding pick a song and then make a playlist out of it and then the dj started playing that's what we did. But the DJ started playing their own shit. And you saw Andy go over there and get into it. You couldn't see, you couldn't hear him, but you could see him getting into it.

Because the guy was, I don't want to say other picks, but he was playing something. And immediately Andy was like, no, well, no, this isn't. But the DJ is like, I know weddings. If I know one thing, it's weddings. And people want to hear this. And he's like, no, they fucking don't. I feel like DJs often fall to their own hubris.

Or they try to show us how cool their music selection is. And it's like, oh, that's the worst. We don't need the deep cuts. We need the A's and the B's. I'll name it. The Jonah Ray. If you're having a private party, maybe, or something. If everybody there is kind of like you.

And you're like, sure, you want to hear this song. maybe you know whatever but yeah if we've just met i don't want you being like trust me no trust me this is what you want yeah i don't give a shit what you like i want to dance with your old aunt yes give me the hits put on to be real exactly got to be real yeah i don't care about your backpack rap deep cut you fucking weirdo i used to be real exactly got to be real yeah i don't care about your backpack rap deep cut you fucking weirdo i used to be that loser people get in my car and i'd play something that i thought they might not know about and then i'd act like i'd been up on it mia i did that with mia the paper that was a very popular song no but i know people get in the car i'd be like you pride you pride is mia like i knew shit about her i just knew that that was the one song and she was a girl. That was all I knew.

Good. Two things. One, two. You heard girls can do music now? Check this out. You probably don't know girls are rapping now. You guys ever heard Lady Tunes? Yeah.

They invented girls doing music in Sri Lanka. Listen to this. You know, guys, I got some gal rap you're really going to love. Yeah. Let me just know, if you're getting in the cherry red probe i'm bumping lady beats yeah time to turn off guy tunes and put on lady beats you're probably gonna think this whoa this dude has a hive voice oh you fool this is a woman oh my god he really shouldn't have taken that last fight but it was $10 million.

Oh, Van Helsing Jr. really knocked him back into the coffin, dude. I honestly liked him until he fought Floyd Mayweather Jr. I hope he sees me again. I hope I see him again. It's honestly sad. It's a different discipline, you know, MMA. It's sad, yeah. I can't drive anymore.

My car is parked in my coffin I also want to say I was making the exact same mistake as Jonah Ray and I used him as an example to deflect attention away from myself just in case he ever hears this I've actually DJ'd perfectly every time I've tried I love Jonah Ray, sure you have

I rock it I'm pretty good at it now I learned my lesson i always want to be i want to be too busy throwing down in those dj situations i don't want to have to be preoccupied with thinking about anything i just want to be dancing i'll buy that well you got to keep like a runway keep like a five six song runway absolutely then you can so then you can enjoy a little bit and then you're like oh what do I have to add? Anyways, yeah, Gangnam Style. I just... Gangnam Style.

Always gets on my fucking nerves. Do you think there will be a point where that's fun to hear again? Maybe for kids who weren't around. Yeah. Like when you hit the Macarena now and then we all like it. But this is like... Gangnam Style is like hitting the Macarena in like a wedding in 98. It's...

Come on, man. We were all there. We were all there. Give it five more years and then and then we can listen again i'd say seven to ten to let it breathe seven to ten let it breathe then we can tell kids you're not up on this let me show you how to do this because now we're just reminiscing about the time you're like oh shit i used to have a van or whatever what's going on in your life it's that friggin the wolf whoop. It's that friggin' the whoop. It sounds like Sonic

when he would eat a bubble underwater to breathe again. Whoop. Whoop. Opa. Opa. Katie Nolan style. Time for your first pick.

All right, my first pick. I'm going to say Sweet Home Alabama. Oh. You like it. Sweet Home Alabama Where the sky's always blue Oh, you don't like it. I don't know.

I just feel like people play that a lot. And maybe it's a song that a lot of people like, but it doesn't mean it's a song you can dance to. And you always get somebody immediately doing the like hoedown arms. That's how I know I gotta leave. Yeah, it's time to pee. It's time to hit the bathroom. Yeah, it's whenever people start like joke dancing to something and you're like why am i out here for a whole song exactly it's exactly that after a while you're like no this does suck yeah there

is a huge difference between a good song and a danceable song which i think is a good disclaimer for this podcast which is like we might name some songs that are good songs but they are they are dance floor i love every song i'm gonna name but they are i went i went a little harder in the paint and there's a lot of songs that are bad songs that are good dance songs that's true absolutely that's true you're like that song sucks but you throw it on i'm in it yeah it's got a funky groove i know what you mean about sweet home alabama like you want people want to and you always see eyes light up because of the familiarity. Right. Yeah, exactly.

And then it just goes to nothing. It's buffet. It's buffet music. Yeah. It's one of those ones that gets a, whoa! I know this.

And then, but you're just in a room full of people who also know that song. So you're just kind of like bopping your head at the same time, but certainly not

doing a lot of ass shaking. So Sweet Home Alabama. It's the infected mushroom happy hardcore remix of Sweet Home Alabama. I knew there was a remix somewhere. And I'm on to Molly, you know what I mean? You'll find me out there. 16 minutes.

Sweating. How long is this song? Who gives a fuck? Run it back. It's not long enough. Yeah, play it again. Yeah, there's nothing to dance to in that song. Excellent pick.

Thank you. Sian, Jordan, come for your first pick. I feel bad. I went like maybe a little hard. So did I. Maybe a little different. I was saying like, what's going to be a,

just feel bad. What's happening? This is my first pick, but Tears in Heaven. What the fuck are you talking about? I mean, what kind of weddings are you going to? It's going to shut the dance floor down.

It is. If somebody played it? Don't you know my name? If I saw you in heaven. I'm saying it's going to shut the whole if somebody played Tears in Heaven in the middle of a wedding. Yeah, I would be bummed out. Everybody would be like, whoa. It's going to completely shut down the dance floor.

The only weddings that would play it would be the weddings where it's kind of personally relevant to them. And then that's tough. That's super hard. You don't want to dance to that. Tough. Well, sometimes you gotta to get through it. I don't even like talking about the song. And I'm not making fun of the song at all.

You brought it up. I know. If it's one guy out there dancing alone. But if I close my eyes and I imagine myself real hometown wedding drunk, I could see I could do it. I'm sure it's hit a Midwestern wedding.

I've been to these weddings, but just for me. 1 a.m., some guys out there plugged his phone into the dj yeah for me if it went to like if it went from if it went from prince to like tears in heaven i'd be like oh man and i just sit i'd probably just sit down right on the dance floor and be like no this is a bummer guy on the dance floor holding a bottle of whiskey and a cup of whiskey. Yeah. Hitting the bottle only.

Yeah. Having a cry. He didn't even get invited. That's just like Jake who works with Sean. Yeah. Who is that? Oh, yeah. He also works.

It just seems like that is it would. You're not wrong. Let's say that. Let's just say you're not wrong. That's the way that I took. I have. Okay. I have other stuff to be like I'm called for. Let's say that. Let's just say you're not wrong. You're totally right. That's the way that I took. I have other stuff to be uncalled for. Nobody's even saying anything. You're good.

I'm doing it the same way. I'm doing it the same way. Tears in Heaven. Because it's also a familiar song. So there would be like a five second period where people are like, what? I feel like everybody would look at each other and go, oh. Because it's familiar, but in the way that everybody knows what it's about. It's just like the words, and you don't know that it's a dark song.

You could go, but everybody kind of knows. Yeah. And I don't. I'm not. I hesitate. I'm just not trying to talk shit about the song. It's a beautiful song, and I'm not saying anything. No, you just said that it's hilarious.

You just said that it's a very funny way for a kid to die. It's what you said. Sorry just said that it's a very funny way for a kid to die. It's what you said. Sorry, I read it. Anyway, that's the end of my pick right there. Well, Sean, since you opened it up to songs that probably never get played, I'm going to take the Remix to Ignition by R. Kelly. Oh, I think that rings true internationally still, man. I think people five hold that one all the time. Yeah, I think that, yes.

I don't think that that. I think a lot of people like yeah orange whip orange whip orange whip all right ignition i understand in theory but that was like once we get into the danger zone like grandma's gone home and it's just us dancing yeah i think it's one of those famous really put your weddings put your weddings in your phone or lock bag wedding i don't think any pop musician songs have gotten canceled in that way no i think i think r kelly's the one i don't think so i would like to agree with you i really would i just feel what we need is we need somebody to remix the remix to ignition as like a cover in almost exactly the same way so that we can do that one because you want a cannon

to get in there and remix it call my man the joker he invented the remix yeah did you just coin the term the three mix yeah i've done a lot of things this morning i also received i never heard that that's i'm giving you credit even if that's that's amazing that's an amazing term amazing i don't think people do it that often but thank you is it just that what would it mean just the third you remix a remix so you three mix it just the, what would it mean? Just the third remix? You remix a remix, so you three mix it. I guess what I really meant was like a cover of a remix. I don't mean to put a damper on this whole three mix combo.

Oh, damn it, it sucks. That's fine, that's fine, that's fine. So I get this big, I guess it depends on what time of the night it comes on. Yeah. Yeah, I mean, and where you are, I think a lot of it depends on where you are. I think they're still playing it at Chicago. Emotionally as well as physically. Yeah.

But I understand what you're saying. I think that at the right weddings, it would blow it. It would fuck shit up. Yeah. I think it would blow it up. Yeah. And you think it could also fill a dance floor. Yeah, definitely.

It's so good. That's the risk. It's also one of those songs you hear the beginning of it and your emotional response is like, I loved this song. This reminds me of when I was, and it takes a little while for you to go, oh shit, that's right.

It takes about six minutes for me to be like, oh damn. Maybe people would be, they would look around and be like giving each other permission to dance to this. Are you going to say anything? Are you going to say anything? Are you going to say anything? I've been in cars where that's happened in the last year.

Yeah. But to be clear, fuck that guy. Yeah, fuck that guy. Fuck that guy. Top to bottom, head to toe. Fuck that guy. We recently decided we're an anti-R. Kelly podcast. Recently?

Yeah. All right. We did 301 and then we had a lot of conversations Sean did you say it's like a wedding where you have to put your phone in a Ziploc bag yeah you get one of those where that's like Julia Roberts getting married it's Julia Roberts

what a dumb it's okay it's just like, oh, weird. That's not who I meant. That's not who I was thinking of even. Yeah, just the famous person wedding where it's like, put your phone in the bag and then you go in and then they're like, yeah, ignition's playing. There's no proof it ever happened.

I'm taking the ignition remix. I think in Southern California where you live. Yeah, I think it's poison. Where you live. SoCal specific. I think that. Give me some remix. I believe you.

I'm on board. I didn't think this was going to be fraught. I didn't think this was going to be a complicated draft. I thought it was hellish. It feels like we all interpreted it a little differently. Everybody took it. I'll put was so straightforward. It feels like we all interpreted it a little differently. Yeah, everybody took it. I'll put our own little... I wanted people to get divorced immediately

when they heard the song was about to play. I'm taking... Okay, I'm taking Mad World by Gary Jules. Oh, how does that one go? All around me are familiar faces. Worn out places. Worn out faces. Oh, I would sit down.

I would sit right down. That song is such a fucking bummer. I don't know, guys. I get out there and I just sort of like let it wash over me. That's what I like when the dance floor clears out. It gives me plenty of room for the arm movement. I really feel the space.

That's who you found out took real drugs before the wedding. When you play that song and they're like, whoa, they did LSD before the wedding. They should do one

just for all the single people. All the single ladies? Just all the recent breakups on the dance floor? Yeah. If you're having a hard time tonight, come out on the floor. Come on in.

Did you cry in the shower before this wedding? Come trauma bond with someone else. They should do it right after the cha-cha slide. There should be. Yeah, that song would. Oh, yeah. yeah can you go what makes this playlist it's gonna be that's almost like a song that i would hear and be like i think it's time to go yeah i think they're trying to tell us it's time to go like you know what i'm drunk vibes are different yeah let's let's just go it's just go. Look at this playlist already. I DVR'd the new Atlanta.

Let's just go home. What you guys don't know is I'm going to take the playlist we make and I'm going to make that the playlist for my eventual wedding in Cuba. Let's just lock that in. Each one of these will have its own moment in the night.

Can I suggest one moment from one of the songs? Later. Gary Jules, Mad World. Originally Tears for Fear song, but the original wasn't sad enough. I'm begging. Not at all. The Gary Jules version from Donnie Darko. Sean Jordan, time for your second pick.

The follow-up to Tears in Heaven by Eric Clapton. It's going to be The Unforgiven by Metallica. You know you know that song no that sounds like a song i don't want to dance it's got the old man in the video he's just just this old, like almost, I think he dies at the end of the video. Wow, in real life. Walking around. I don't even know what, it's just like an old, old, old dude in the video. And the song is just such a bummer. It's just, it's just the worst for a wedding that I could think of other than Tears in Heaven.

Yeah. I feel like you may have been to a wedding where this got played i don't think so i don't i tried to pick songs that i'm pretty sure i never heard even at like even at some weird dance where they're like you know well this this this was our parents love this song or i don't know even some weird way to sneak it in i don't think i've ever heard the unforgiven by metallica okay even at a south dakota wedding it seems like maybe some people have walked out to that not that i recall slowly that's how they started it just walking down the aisle to the unforgiven I have a good idea. Let me write that down. This is... There's definitely been people dancing

to like an orchestral remix of Unforgiven. Oh, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Maybe if they take out James Hetfield. In a wedding dress that landed above the knees. You know what I mean? If they take out James Hetfield and like... Is it Hetfield or Hatfield?

Hetfield? Hetfield, I think. Whatever. They take him out. Maybe spice it up a little bit with some brass, some horns or something. You could make it a not a bummer song. Give it the Scott treatment. Give it the Scott treatment.

Yeah, go ahead and remix it. Give it the Scott treatment. Talk to me at 20. The Unforgiven by Metallica. Unforgiven by Metallica. Katie Nolan, time for your second pick. I'm going with Song 2 by Blur. Oh, no.

Oh. A great song that's a great like hype song for let's say a sporting event but when they play it at a wedding it's like okay what are we gonna jump up and down you and David are playing on hard because you're

playing songs that they would play at a wedding yes which is what I thought we had to do I thought that's what we were doing well it's a smarter version I to do. I thought that was what we were doing. Well, that's the smarter version. I can do that. I can play songs. I'll, I'll,

I got some of those. you just draft what you want to draft. Speak to your heart. This is America. Yeah. It's semi-free. It's a handicap,

you know? It's free for certain people. You do it your way and we'll do it, right. Free asterisk. David and I are just used to having to

try a little bit harder than everybody else no big deal and me too hey guys hey hey people guys. Hey, people. Not just guys. Hey, everyone. This is just a thumbs up from about 6'2 inches in the air. All right? Are you giving yourself 6'2"? Yeah.

The doctor tried to tell me 6'3 the other day. Really? That's who would tell you? Well, they saw me get a boner. that doesn't even make sense it's a six foot three inch boner why laying down yeah you're laying down with the faded pubes and everything guys we're talking about the puke with the high and tight david goes he fades it he fades it.

He fades it. That was really crazy. I tried to fade it. Woo. Woo. Yeah, I know what you mean. I feel like you get the little kids come out and do the thing where they jump and pretend to like whatever, but they all just end up falling because they don't really understand how to jump yet they just learned it and so they're just doing that and then you're like this is

again a bathroom song a my feet hurt so I'm going to sit down for a little bit song a bathroom song is the funniest thing to call it grandma's not dancing on for this one no no I'm not I mean I'm I don't I don't dance mostly songs that like i

don't know the actual words to a lot of times i find like if i don't know the words unless i'm in really not a lot i mean i have seen you dance the songs you know the words do and it is i sure have tlc baby baby baby i sure do know the words to that. I miss my petty conversation with my sex, baby. I'm out here. All right. Dave Borey. Time for your second and third pick. This is, okay, my second pick. This is another one I've seen done at a wedding, and I get it.

It's not even niche. It was a very popular song, but there is a group of people who are going to go nuts when you play it, but the group of people who are going go nuts when you play it but the group of people who are gonna go nuts is not worth like the nod to the heads is not worth the overall downer that it's gonna be and i'm picking uh crawling by lincoln park oh yeah Linkin Park. Oh, yeah. Oh. Like, I've seen it where the DJ's like, huh?

You guys know? And, like, where the DJ's like, huh, you guys know? And like the seven people are like, I would be one of those seven people. See, that's what I'm saying. It works for a niche, but for the whole floor, never. You will never get the whole floor converted. No, it's too, too aggressive in the wrong way. You can be aggressive. Why are they bumping that at emo night? Yeah, absolutely. That's what I'm saying.

It's a hit. It's a hit. I'm not taking away from it. Remember the disclaimer. We are not saying these are all bad songs. They're bad songs. It's a song that you cannot get the whole dance floor going to.

I've seen it happen. It clears out. R.i.p chester bennington yeah all right that's not the point is not the banger right driving home from work oh turn it up oh yeah on a friday on a friday i couldn't go home from work listening to songs that get me stoked unless I was going to go do something buck. Like if I was just going home to eat dinner and then kind of go to bed to go to work again, I couldn't listen to shit that got me hyped. But is leaving work itself not buck? Not enough. Not enough for that. On Friday it is.

Ooh, that Friday? Like put the key in the ignition? I'd walk out with a cig in my hand from my cubicle. I'd have it in my hand ready to get in my car and play like Tupac and light the cig. Fridays were different. Fridays were amazing. At a call center. Oh, dog.

That's exactly what I'm talking about. You want to see people in the best mood you're ever going to see them in. Go to a call center on whatever day, because they have crazy shifts. Whatever day their Friday is, that group, look at them when they walk out for that just pure joy yeah unfiltered it's crazy it's crazy yeah they would give somebody like if you were just like hey can i have 100 bucks you'd be like fuck yeah you can have 100 bucks yeah i don't give a shit i it i had a kanye song that i saved just for those occasions from good fridays yeah of course you did of course course you did. I used to, too. I wouldn't listen to it any other time.

Yeah, I believe it. It was right around when I met you that that song came out that I would listen to that when I was driving home from that Tigard call center. Lincoln Park, this is what I heard. I don't know if it's true, but that they just sent each other hard drives with their music on it.

They never hung out and did music. They were purely a corporation. What? They all sent their parts to mike shinoda and he just like all mixed it all together good to hear you say his name i don't use your voice that's bad shinoda is my boy i know he is shinoda and i are close personal friends i would love to know mike shinoda and usually when you do your boy it's not people we would actually want to be friends with, but Mike Shinoda? I got no beef with Mike Shinoda. I don't have a problem with him either. It's not a good use of your

boy. That is Katie's boy. I can be friends with Mike Shinoda and I can be friends with you, Katie. Those can be two different parts of me. Never the two shall meet. Just like Lincoln Park. Never the five shall meet five suvs pull up lincoln parks get out they perform they get back in their five suvs and then they drive away don't even have dinner together that's the lincoln park experience there are different hotels yeah the cars don't even park they link in idle you know we can move

on we can move on to the next if you wanted to let's sit in it let's yeah let's kind of reflect on katie nolan saying they link an idol wow david time for your third pick my third pick this is another one man i've seen it happen and you're like whoa because the beat kind of works, but the work. Because listen, there's a lot of songs where the beat works and you can just get away with it. And you're like, we're not really listening to the words. This song is not that. I'm picking Love the Way You Lie by Eminem and Rihanna.

Oh, yeah. All right. That's a really good pick. Just gonna stand there and watch me burn. Well, that's all right because I like the way it hurts. Just gonna stand there and hear me cry. Well, that's all right because I love the way you lie. I love the way you lie.

Do not want to hear that shit at a wedding. Are you kidding me? This song, he's screaming about domestic violence. Talks about hitting her next time. Next time, I'll lay my fist at the drywall. Next time. Dog, I'm dancing with your grandma. Yeah.

Turn that shit off. You're torn, though, because you're... I'm not torn. Well, it's got your line. It's got that shit off. You're torn though because you're I'm not torn. Well, it's got your line. It's got your favorite lyric in it. I guess that's why they call it windowpane. Oh, wow. For the longest time I thought we were just joking about that being your favorite

lyric, but here in the light of day, you picked that song. Now it's kind of hard to Did you know that, Katie? David's favorite song lyric of all time, no joke, is M&M. That's why they call it windowpane. M&M, I guess that's why they call it windowpane. David one night told us that, and I was like, what?

And he goes, yeah, straight up, that's my favorite song lyric of all time. Before we started, he was like, we were about to go to the roost. We hadn't started drinking yet, and he huddled everyone together. We weren't really friends. This was us trying to be like, do we have the glue to be friends? And Dave was like, this is my favorite. Zach, turn off the TV. We stopped watching boat crashes.

He hit a fork on the side of the glass. We stopped watching slow motion boat crashes. Scandinavia's deadliest boat crashes. We saw that on YouTube. And he huddled everyone together up. And he said, before we embark on this friendship, I just need everyone to know. Dude, you could walk in and see how stoned Zach was

by what was on YouTube. Because sometimes it'd be like slow motion hydraulic presses crushing crayons or something. I like that shit too. You know what I've been doing lately is like in the background when I'm working, I watch Last Day of High School videos. Oh, that's a fun one. Yeah, it's very weird. Because they got them from all different years.

Dude, Harper's always posting those hydraulic videos of things getting crushed. And it's amazing. Oh, I've been on that. I've been on that for years i love that guy but uh yeah love the way you lie i get it right you can definitely dance the beat drops but it's it's just i don't think eminem is great for parties in general to be honest no it's a little aggressive yeah it's oh it's too much i don't want to hear he says steel knife through knife through my windpipe. That's like the third bar. Yeah. Like, dog, no. Two trailer park girls go round the outside.

Round the outside. Round the outside. That's his most danceable song. In Love the Way You Lie, if the words were even lighter, if it was like a lighter message, it's still way too hard of a song to dance at a wedding. But the beat, you can kind of dance to the beat is what i'm saying yeah are you saying that the the following lyrics aren't a light enough message

let me hear him let me hear him you don't get another chance life is no nintendo game but you lied again now you get to watch your leave out the window guess that's why they call it window pain when you went when you went into like Denver Inc. were they like you want the whole thing tattooed on your back? Yeah, yeah. Put it on the Ten Commandments tablets. You showed them a picture of young Eminem and you're like

I want this in between the angel wings on my shoulder blades. And then boring old English letters across the page he really went out of his way to do this windowpane line now you get to watch her leave out the window it doesn't fit who leaves out the window

oh I think she's not to stand up from my favorite lyric but yeah she's leaving the house and he's watching out the window he's watching her through the window leave through the front door that's why they call it windowpane. That's why they call it windowpane. Yeah.

Got it. There's another lyric here, and this is once you get to know David better. This is so like, he'll tell you the windowpane one pretty off the rip, but like. If you crack that nut, if you really crack that nut, what he's going to let you know is. This was just, he just told us recently, this was in Minneapolis. It was 4 a.m. We were all walking back.

Right after he goes, this is the best show I've ever been a part of and then we were playing uno in the lobby and then the three of us were quietly walking back the vibes were great and he said you know the thing about it is my actual favorite lyric from that song and that's my favorite lyric and all the music is baby it was me maybe our relationship isn't as crazy as it seems maybe that's what happens when a tornado meets a volcano what's even the rhyme scheme on that you gotta hear eminem say it can you say it in the rhythm in which he says it no tornado volcano is the rhyme i can't i can't he's so angry in that song there's no version of it that i could do i'm pretty sure at one point he says if she tries to leave again I'm a tire to the

bed and set this fucking house on fire yeah which is not what I want to which is not what I want to dance I'm not trying to dance to that and then Rihanna sings beautifully so beautifully to cut through this guy who you should have broken up with

to be honest the whole song is like for guy who you should have broken up with, to be honest. The nerve. The whole song is like. For the record, you should never love the way anybody lies unless you're talking about how they lie down in a bed. You ever watch the video? It's Dominic Monaghan and Megan Fox fighting. He had a moment. They're just screaming at each other, fighting.

And that's the whole song is him. That song is insane. Insane. You know what? If that song came on on a wedding i'm just gonna stand there god damn you are fantastic yeah i'm glad we're friends me too katie nolan time for your third pick okay again a reiterating disclaimer this doesn't mean that a song stinks. This doesn't even mean I dislike a song. But I'm going to go with We Are the Champions.

Oh, interesting. Interesting. That's an odd one at a wedding. Too much of a wrestling tournament vibe? High school wrestling tournament? It just feels like, and this is kind of true of a lot of, I feel like Blur was also a sports song. A lot of sports songs don't, they're hype songs,

but they really don't transfer over to a wedding. And I feel like We Are The Champions, again, you get that moment where everybody's like, oh, I like this song. But it starts slow. It's the, I paid my due. You know know that's how it starts right yeah and then and then it builds to the thing and all you really get people doing is like fist pumping at each other but there's no you don't you sit down and eat you you i don't think you can really dance to

that song but i've definitely heard it at a wedding because it's a good song you can only do that thing where you lip sync at another person. Right. And like pretend to be really into it. That's really basically your only move. That's the only move you have. That's the last song. That's like a last song.

Yeah. Like, all right, close up your tabs. We did it. We champion this wedding. We are the champions of love. I can see Malloy playing that when him and Liz get married. Like when they're like, as soon as they say I do or something, I could see that happen. Yeah. But even then, I think you'd skip, like as soon as they say I do or something, I could see that happen. Yeah. But even then,

I think you'd skip to like the part where it's talking about being champions, not the part about paying your dues. I feel like Malloy's going to get mad at you for suggesting that. I don't know why. When they cut that giant wrestling ring that's a wedding cake,

I could see them playing that. Liz is also getting married. I know. Well, yeah, I know. Says you. Yeah, that's true. I'm just going off the two. It's my special day. I going off the two tvs in the living room that both had different wrestling matches at all times so that's just what i'm going have that wedding you guys i want to go

to a wedding again so bad they're so bad katie if you guys could expedite the process and please i'm gonna tell you right now it's gonna be like two years i don't intend on doing this anytime soon people are already asking me like, so what month? I'm like, I don't fucking know. Look, I got the thing. This was the thing. We're doing it. Let's beat it up.

Yeah, go ahead. Go ahead and do it. You mean like this, the rest of this year counts as a year. So the rest of 2022. So that's not going to count as a year for me. That's a month in a year. Your guys want to go suit shopping. That's why they call it window paint.

Tell them to go to Indochino. It's real. They got real nice ones. nice ones unless no go to betterhelp.com oh yeah go to or you could get one at uh buy suit yeah you could get in a suit from american giant you can maybe do love american giant okay comfy pants comfy pants shout out to all the sponsors so we are the champions i don't know maybe that's just my pick but that's my pick hopefully you find someone just as drunk as you to hard sang at yeah jordan time for your tiered pick i'm really i'm i have some songs on here that i would dance to but i don't think so i'm gonna pick this one and i don't think anybody would actually have the gall to remain on the dance floor if this got played at a wedding. Mitigated or unmitigated.

Even if they wanted to. Now, I don't know how to use mitigated and unmitigated differently. You just only before gall. I think unmitigated only comes before the word gall. I've never heard it in another way. Except after C. I'm going to pick a two live crew song and again i don't think anybody would actually stay on the dance floor this is this is regional

sean this is regional sean i think you're already wrong yeah we want some pussy Let me say Hey, we want some pussy Hey, we want some pussy Nobody would have the balls to stay on that dance floor while that song played. Did you know that Miami is a place? Older people are at, there's no Older people want pussy too, Sean. Also, older people were young when that song came out. When it came out, like 86?

I just don't think. Those people are like 50, 60 now. I think it's too much. I know everybody likes it. I just think it's too much. I don't think there would be a general group consensus. Sure, maybe, but I don't. I've never seen it, and i just don't think it would work

i understand what you're saying i think you're discounting the entire state of florida and two live crew specifically uncle luke's contribution to that i suppose if any member of two live crew or an adjacent crew were to get married maybe but i've never i don't i just don't see it happening what is a marriage if not a two live crew damn that is wait is that why they call it window pain that's why they call it window pain that ultimately that's why they call it when it gets down to it as soon as i think i've got it figured out there's a new there's a new pain i feel like there was a 90 minute window where you could have played that song at my wedding. I think so too. I think there's a minute where like when everybody's hopped up. When was the last time any of you heard this song?

Probably three years at most. They say we want some pussy. I bet 50 times in that song. Could have gone 51. That is a lot to handle at a wedding. I've heard you say that that many times in a night. Yeah. Well, sometimes I really am horny, man.

No, I've went out there and I'm gone, I'm away from my family. For the listeners, that is like not at all. No, that's not. That's not what's going on. Kind of. That's me being like, let's go to Wawa and then go to my room and talk about skateboarding. If anything, I've heard him say, we want some more shots. Like, hey, we want some Jager.

What would I do with all this pussy? That's what I hear him say a lot. What would I do? What do you want me to do with that? Probably buy it a Jaeger bomb. You keep your pussy, madame. I'd rather have a Jaeger bomb. Excuse me, miss.

I don't need any pussy tonight. Thank you. I don't think that is getting play at a wedding. I don't think it's going to work. I might be out of my element here, but I just don't see anyone. I say it too much. It's too much. Okay.

If it was once or twice, it's just so much. It's the whole song. Okay. I think we're going to have to have a, hey, we want some pussy dance off at the Seattle Live show. I'm really trying to spice up the playlist now because someone's going to make this into a playlist and it's going to be, they're going to get flagged, whoever does it. It's going to get this into a playlist and it's going to be they're going to get flagged whoever does it weird no fly less definitely make sure that you go from uh tears

in heaven directly into uh we want some pussy that i think that's how i would do it i don't want to backseat drive here but if i'm making this playlist that's the order make this playlist on the dark web i do you know i do know what you mean about sometimes you worry that it would be too dirty i just like that song is so old that like the oldest people will have heard it you know what i'm saying they used to play it at deja vu when we were under 21 we'd go to this place in minneapolis called they got them everywhere but deja vu it was like a 18 and over strip club 18 and over i think i used to live by one by the Taco Bell in Federal Way. Anyways, keep going. I never went there.

I'd have some fun every now and then. I'd call it Vooja Day. They loved it. Wow, that's cool. Well, that's queer. Why would you call it that? Well, it's just one of the many interesting and queer things that I did as a youth. Vooja Day, the sense that none of this has ever happened before.

I think it might be a George Carlin joke. No one's ever done this. Boujadet. Oh, mother, I'm having boujadet. Oh, boujadet. This is a brand new experience. Well, Ian, you've never been to Disney World, so yes, you should be having boujadet.

Boujadet. Man, that doesn't sound... A little chubby kid like, boujadet. Boujadet? Man, that doesn't sound so sound. A little chubby kid like boujadet. Boujadet. Well, boujadet. He's like

had Taco Bell when chalupas came out. Boujadet. What a blessed boujadet. In the middle of a Taco Bell. I have another that boujadet was amazing. In a taco bell. I have another that Bouchard Day was amazing. I'm a blazer.

Time for my third pick. I'm sticking with the way I approached this draft, which is like, no one would ever play these, but it would be funny if they did. I'm taking

Flight of the Bumblebee by Rimsky-Korsakov. I don't know, dude. If I was a certain amount of drunk, I could really go hard to that song. All right. Man, I'll come officiate someone's wedding if they want this playlist to be their wedding playlist.

I'll come officiate the wedding. I would just like to see it. I would just like to see how people plan on dancing to that. That song's a very hijinks song. I feel like if I heard that, I'd be like, who's up to something? Someone's scheming. Somebody's stealing a piece of the wedding cake, you know? Yeah.

Yeah. Perfectly named. Yeah. Totally. Fucking nailed it. This Ritsky Korsakov guy saw Bumblebee and he was like, I got you. Fucking dead to rights, bro. This is you. I know your whole thing. This is you, thing this is you all figured out listen this is you that's what you sound like

you're all like and i'm like all right dude fucking dude. Fucking idiot. Fucking loser. Pick a new angle, you fucking dork. Oh, man. Tool. Hanging out on flowers. Fucking tool. You're scaring all the flowers, bro.

That was my third pick. And before my fourth pick, we're going to take a short break. Oh, boy. This episode of All Fantasy Everything is brought to you by Policy Genius. Policy Genius, I'm going to hit you. A short break. Oh boy. policy genius essentially just helps you get the life insurance you need fast so you can get on with your life with policy genius you can find life insurance policies that start at just 292 dollars per year for one million dollars of coverage some options offer same-day approval and avoid unnecessary medical exams so i have life insurance it had nothing to do with me. It's my wife did everything, but it's tough. It's a hassle to go through and get. You have to research it, which I don't like researching anything. If I buy something, I just go into the person that works at the store and

say, what is right in the middle? What's not the best? What's not the worst? And that is how I do it. With life insurance, obviously you want to be a little bit more careful about that. But how do I know where to start? You know what I mean? I have no idea what to do, where to look. Nobody does. And that's what Policy Genius does. They just go in, they find and compare all the best quotes for you. They just go to all the nation's top insurers, and then they give you your best options. They're just a few clicks, and then you're going to find your lowest price. And their expert license support team is your advocate. They work for you. They're not getting bonuses. They're not getting anything like that from certain insurance companies. They're not out there being smarmy. They just want to help you out. And they're answering the questions,

handling the paperwork, shaking the hands, kissing the babies. They're doing it all for you. And if you don't have life insurance, I know it sucks to talk about or to think about, but you're just going to stick people with the bill. You're going to stick your loved ones with the bill. Don't nobody want to do that. You know what I mean? Get covered. I don't want anyone inheriting my debt. And then they see what I spent money on. Probably. I don't need all that nonsense in my life. Get it covered. Get an insurance policy. Get it handled. And like I said, Policy Genius gives you unbiased advice from a licensed expert support team. They have thousands of five

star reviews on Google, Trustpilot from customers who've felt the benefits of their service. So get on it. Don't wait. Don't hesitate. Don't procrastinate. Oh, yeah, I got a song on Spotify as a rapper. That's neither here nor there. Don't put off life insurance. Make it easy with Policy Genius. Head to policygenius.com or click the link in the description to get your free life insurance quotes and see how much you could save. That's policygenius.com. And we're back. Yeah.

Yeah. That was a different and we're back. See, you flipped it well i'm just i'm it's november i'm trying some new stuff out you know what it is man trying it all out it's time for my fourth pick yeah i'm gonna take black by pearl jam See, now that is a perfect example That song is absolutely beautiful But it just would be such a bummer at a wedding

You know, that was like their first song they ever recorded That was the first song they ever recorded? First song they ever recorded It was the single off of 10 And I think the first version they recorded Was the version they they ever recorded. It was the single off of 10, and I think the first version they recorded was the version they used for the album, I think. Oh, that's cool. I like stories like that. That's wild.

What's the Mrs. Potts or whatever from Beauty and the Beast? She did that in one take and they used the first take. Is that what the... Am I mixing stories up or is that the right story? Yeah, no, that's right. I love that. You can lie to me about that. I love the way you lie when you lie about that. I love those stories. lie to me about that. I love the way you lie when you lie about that. I love those stories.

I eat that right up. I love the way you lie, dude. That's why they call a windowpane. Is black just about someone losing their virginity? I don't know. I can't. I've never looked up the lyrics because sometimes it's more fun just to think you know what Eddie Vedder's saying

I don't think I've ever known what Eddie Vedder's saying I just know that I know she'll be a beautiful star in someone else's sky but why why can't it be mine

good luck dancing to that at a wedding. On five, bro. Black by Pearl Jam. That's my fourth pick. And what that means is, as we all know, it's time for Sean's fourth pick. Revolution 9 by The Beatles. Number nine.

Number nine. Number nine. Number nine. Number nine. Number nine, number nine, number nine, number nine, number nine, number nine. It's on the White Album, and I heard it one time coming home. I'd never heard the White Album, and Ian and I were coming back from a show in Seattle. Or no, long, long, too. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Seattle?

No, yeah. And he played the White Album, which I'd never heard the whole thing, and I didn't know how many good songs were on it. But then that song, Revolution 9, came up, and it's just a it's like a clockwork orange song it was they had just started doing i think like four track recording i think it was like a new thing and so they just it was like a crazy psychedelic soundscape that just has one of them repeating, number nine, number nine, number nine. It's insane. I just listened to it again today. I haven't heard it in a few years.

And it's just, I mean, it's only a song because it's on an album. It's crazy. But that at a wedding would be, it would be fucking such a buzzkill at a wedding. It's scary. We were driving down I-5. It was like rainy and dark. Yeah. And if one of us would have just killed the other one,

the other one would have expected it coming. It's such a crazy, scary song. I remember saying, what if I duct taped a speaker to your ceiling when you were asleep and just started playing this? That was the scenario that I thought of. I was like, what if I snuck in and duct taped a speaker to the ceiling

and hit play at like four in the morning. So twisted. And then you turn the light on and the Joker's standing over your bed with a spike bat, naked. Which Joker? But it's Diddy. Okay, I'm gonna do it. So you're like, what's up? Yeah, Revolution

9 by the Beatles. Sean Jordan picked Revolution 9 by the Beatles. Katie Jordan picked Revolution 9 by the Beatles. Katie Nolan, time for your fourth pick. I'm worried this is too much like David's first pick, but I'm going to go with Barbie Girl. Oh, yeah. Fantastic. Barbie, let's go party.

I'm a Barbie girl in the Barbie world. Life is plastic. It's fantastic. Just, like, don't do that. What are we doing? I thought we all agreed to forget this one, that it happened and that we liked it. It was like, you know, it's like McDonald's. You can eat it, but you don't go around being like, I had McDonald's. It's like, just forget it.

You know, we had fun with Barbie Girl, whatever that was that we were going through at the time. We felt the need to have that be a hit song. Swedish tough guy pop. And we don't have to feel like guilty about it. I'm sure it has to do with like our parents or something, but like we don't have to remind people that like, yo, this slapped for us. We love this because it's like

just leave it where it lies. I got Dana by talking to her like this. Come on, Dana. Let's go party. Come on, Dana, let's go party. Come on, Dana, let's get married. Oh, that's good. Hello, hello. Swedish pop songs don't really have to be about anything. That song Waterloo is about the Battle of Waterloo.

And about how she's in a relationship that's like the Battle of Waterloo. That's crazy. By ABBA. Oh, sweet. Waterloo. I told you. You won the war.

Yeah. Didn't you have the Aqua CD, Ian? Yeah. Oh, yeah. One of my first ones. Do you remember that song Candyland? Of course. Me and Sam in high school used to sing it.

But this is so terrible. song Candyland? Of course. Me and Sam in high school used to sing it, but instead, this is so terrible. Instead of saying coming from Bountyland, we would say, come on, get in my van. Okay. We were 16. It was very funny. It's still funny. I am the candy man. In the heat of the night, we'll be

dancing a fiesta. We'll be dancing a fiesta when the sun comes alive was this a second single or was this there was this is a cut from someone who had the album i think that might have been a fourth single they the every song went uh quadruple platinum if i remember right yeah i don't think you remember right i think you might be mistaken. Aquarium, 1997. What else? Oh, yeah. Dr. Jones, Dr. Jones, calling Dr. Jones. This is all the same song.

This is all the same song. Wake up now. What? Does he say wake up now like that in the song? Yeah. Creepy. I've never, I've never. Somebody go ahead and make some bonus tracks on this playlist and go ahead

and include those if you would for real boy tell me your fourth and then your final picks uh my fourth pick and listen oh boy i understand wanting to do this and i think and i will even go so far as to say i think there's a lot of songs in the gangster rap genre that you can play that work at a wedding. Right? We can freak it by Corrupt. Always amazing. Yeah. Like all kinds of shit you could do.

The one that you can't do, it just goes a little too far. The beat is a little too insane. I'm saying Bow Down by West Side Connection. Oh, my. The world is mine. Nigga, get back. Don't fuck with my stack. The gauge is racked.

About to drop the bomb. I'm the motherfucking Don. Big fish in a small pond. And I understand why you want to do it, right? Because you're DJing, and now we're deep in the West Coast shit, and we're all having a good time. And I understand the walk, like in a certain like i could see how i would be tempted to like all right but now i'm gonna go over the top for real though they're not ready yet it's too much

it's too much because there's no you can't that is not a put a smile on your face song they did not intend for someone to be having a good time when that song played that is fine but it's also not like a hardcore fucking song either it's just like no that's a gang that's a gangster song that's like top of the list gangster it's like very it's like made for crip walking it's designed to listen to like rolling around yeah in a neighborhood where you want to look hard like it's designed to look hard while you're listening to it ice cube says everybody freeze we want the cheese on your knees but naked please it's like it's like aggressive and i get it why you would want to but i think that for a wedding i don't think it would play on your knees but naked please

yeah that was the part we all loved in fourth grade it's very funny to make those demands on that voice it all works because we believe in it it's like a tinkerbell lyric you know what i mean but like it's a very funny thing about boujadet you remember when those pizza lunchables came out nothing that was crazy i feel like they're back i think they might be back you are they doing pizza lunchables again i think i saw them but i could just be it might have just been lunchables and i'm shocked i still did those it was a little Chalupa shell, wasn't it? No, it was like a hard, it was like a soft cracker. Soft cracker, which is a weird phrase. Soft cracker is, yeah, what I would call it.

Not in my book. Like you, Sean. Man, I was wondering who was going to say it. We all caught it. Yeah, no, bow down doesn't work. And my final pick is another one where you see I see why you think

it's gonna work you're in the pocket we're having fun a lot of repetitive choruses a lot of choruses you can yell even grandma's on board but you know what does not work is Coco by OT Genesis I'm in love with the Coco what does not work is Coco by OT Genesis.

It's like good for like a second. And then you're like, oh, this is all about. And then you're just waiting for him to say, baking soda, I got baking soda. Steve played that in High Plains. And that was one where I stopped. You guys could be making these up completely. And I'd be like, oh, that's crazy. And then I Google it.

And it's like, nah. You've heard that song. Baking soda? It's about cocaine. Yeah. Katie Nolan. Grow up. Steve played that on the High Plains dance floor.

And I stopped, I think, like dead where I was. And I just walked off sad. And that was at High Plains. That's like a fucking wedding. Yeah, that's what that's like a wedding it's like i because it's like it makes sense on paper so many of these songs make like i could see where you would but it's just like right you're slight you're on spotify you're making the playlist and you're like i'm gonna i'm gonna hit him with this because you only remember that part with it yeah like that's all you remember you don't remember that it's a whole song yeah about like

that's a cholo and you're like oh i don't know i don't know yeah it's a whole song we're like they're gonna hear the deep parts of the song it's not four minutes it's four whole minutes yeah of just like a guy yelling i'm in love with the coco that's too long for a cocaine song. Cocaine should be 20 seconds. Yeah. Yeah. How long is the Eric Clapton song?

Like a minute? Yeah. Longer than that for sure. It's longer than four minutes. He was doing too much. Yeah. Coco by OT Genesis. Fun song for the car.

Not for the dance floor at a wedding. No car bits outside the car. That's right. Exactly. You are hearing me. Yeah. And that's it. That's right. Exactly. You are hearing me. Yeah. And that's it. That's my final pick.

Kieti Nolan. Kieti Nolan. All right. My last pick, right? It's my last pick. Yeah. She never knows. Is Life is a Highway.

Especially if it's that Rascal Flatts version. Life is a highway. I wanna ride it all night long. I'll dance. It's not gonna be a clear dance floor. It's like just a little too, it's too slow. I'll dance my ass off for that song. I don't know.

Is that a bad pick? No, no, no. You're dancing a life. We're allowed to say it's a bad pick. Yeah, you are. But not for, I don't wanna end on a, I don't wanna end on a bad one. Well, you did,

my friend. Life's a highway, ain't it? Yeah, I was dancing to it. When we break to eat lunch for a second, I'm going to listen to that song. I like the Rascal Flats version because that dude's a way better singer than John Cochran. No, Tom Cochran. Stop saying

pick. Johnny Cochran? That's not for me. You don't know Johnny Cochran sang that song? That's Johnny Cochran. The onlychran. Whoa, stop saying pick. Johnny Cochran? That's not for me. You don't know Johnny Cochran sang that song? That's Johnny Cochran. The only reason I think it's good is because they get to the chorus so many times and so fast. That's true. They do hit it a lot of times. And maybe I just haven't listened to it in a while, but when I picture it, the beat is the rhythm of skipping. And anything that has that kind of rhythm, at a lot of the weddings i go to you're just

getting the kind of the people that want to dance to it are the are the not the people you want to dance with oh there's songs like that for sure that's not an empty i should i should have gone more empty dance floor this was more okay like but this is songs i leave when they come on okay there you go there's that one all right whatever i didn't stick the landing whose turn is it sean jordan didn't stick the landing like when you won that gold medal in rhythmic gymnastics that's thank you so much there's no humbling in rhythmic gymnastics unless we all noticed your elbows were double jointed when you stuck your arms i was the first time yeah uh every everybody hurts by rem oh yeah yeah everybody hurts

sometimes i'm going like back to the church on that one yeah let's see who's hanging out in here it just starts the first lyric it goes when your day is long like oh bummer you can just get sick yeah yeah man everybody hurts it'd be weird to see michael steif happy well listen to what's her frequency kenneth man he sounds pretty happy in that that's a good song i'm gonna put that in my liked right now everybody hurts by r.i.m uh time for my final pick the final pick of the draft and i'm taking final pick of the draft and I'm taking Carol of the Bells you remember that what was it

what was it Meryl Streep young Meryl Streep young Meryl Streep old Meryl Streep old Meryl Streep dead Meryl Stre it? Meryl Streep. Young Meryl Streep. Young Meryl Streep. Old Meryl Streep. Old Meryl Streep. Dead Meryl Streep. Dead Meryl Streep. Oh, man. That was like six years ago. It still gets me laughing.

Yeah. Next time we're not on Zoom, we'll recreate it. We'll recreate it in Seattle. We'll do Meryl Streep for you, Seattle. There's no way that was six years ago. That makes sense. It could have been. The podcast is six years old. Jesus.

It's a little baby. Little baby. Little baby. Going to kindergarten. Marissa, do you have a song to clear the dance floor at a wedding? Yeah, I'm going to say the National Anthem. That was the one I was going to say

and I was like, why? That's good, Mars. Or better yet, another country's national anthem. Oh, that would be crazy. Like, oh, Canada. Yeah. Because no one would know what was going on. This is just like air guns.

She's like, yeah, dude. Hell yeah. To recap, Gangnam. David went first. Gangnam Style by Psy. Crawling by Linkin Park. Love the way you lie. By his boy.

Marshall Mathers. Future Rihanna. Bow Down by the West Side Connection. And Coco by his boy Marshall Mathers featuring Rihanna Bow Down by the West Side Connection and Coco by his boy OT Genesis Katie Nolan went second took Sweet Home Alabama by Leonard Skinner Song 2 by Blur

We Are The Champions by Queen Barbie Girl by Aqua and Life Is A Highway by whoever sang in it Sean Jordan went third He Took Tears In Heaven by Eric Clapton Unforgiven by Metallica

We Want Some Pussy by 2 Live Crew, Revolution No. 9 by The Beatles, and Everybody Hurts by R.E.M. I went last. I took the Ignition remix by R. Kelly, Mad World by Gary Jules, Flight of the Bumblebee by Rimsky-Korsakov, Black by Pearl Jam, and Carol

of the Bells by, let's say, the Trans-Siberian Orchestra. That is who it is. We left some picks on the board. There's one big one hallelujah by jeff buckley was one that i would man i really feel like i took this too literally chicken dance like me too and it's just i feel like now i'm seeing it from a different lens now that you said everybody's and I'm like oh it's funnier to pick one

I had brick on there by Ben's form I mean I'm saying these would to me we should have done it the way you did it that was more challenging I wasn't even thinking about that but the other ones we had I had the seinfeld theme i had just so much threat by ross cause date rape by sublime was on there

god that fucking song i just had d DMX written down. There's so much that works. There's some DMX songs that you could fill with. The Rough Riders anthem, dude. The Rough Riders anthem would get everybody out there. Well, for Pete's sake, we want to hear yours.

Hit us up at AllFantasyPod on Twitter, AllFantasyPodcast at gmail.com. Shout out to everyone on the AFE Patreon. Thank you for holding us down. Shout out to everyone on the AFE subreddit, the Shaslackity,

the super producer Mars, super producer Marissa Melnick. Seattle, come see us tomorrow night. What else? Oh, shout out to Seisu Carmel. Love you, Mom. Shout out to Frankie Ocean. Shout out to Sid the Dude. Shout out to Haji Beats. And more important than all of that,

tune in again next week to another brand new episode of All Fantasy Everything. Sha-clackity! that was a hate gun podcast