All Fantasy Everything - Summer Jams (w/ Sean Jordan, David Gborie and Miel Bredouw)

Episode Date: June 22, 2017

WINDOWS DOWN. STEREOS UP. THATS THE WAY WE LIKE TO... enjoy certain songs during a specific time of year. Host Ian Karmel is joined by comedians Sean Jordan, David Gborie and Miel Bredouw to draft summerjamzzzzzz. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

This is a HeadGum Podcast. Welcome to another brand new episode of All Fantasy Everything, ladies and gentlemen. The podcast that drank too much last night. Doesn't feel like coming up with an intro. That's the podcast. The podcast got hammered last night. The podcast was up until five? Five. You shouldn't be allowed to have alcohol at your house.

They should only be at bars. I've been saying that for years. You shouldn't be allowed to have recreational alcohol stores. Nothing recreational about it. It was a job last night. We were putting in work. Clocked in, clocked out. Alright everybody, turn it off.

Shut it down! Shut it down! The podcast that lives next to a cop and plays music as loud as you can out of your Sonos until like five. I turned it down. I know shit 30 times. Yeah. Every time I turn it back up and then I just, I'd be sitting on the couch and I'm like,

it's getting a little louder. See you in the kitchen. Just sneaking it. What do you do? Had a night. We had a little night. Had a little night. We rang in the summer.

It was a summer. And accordingly, today we are drafting Summer Jams. Summer Jams. Summer Jams. The voice is Sean Jordan right there. Hello. At Sean S. Jordan. Sean Cougar Melon Jordan on the gram.

On the Instagram. We're also joined by podcast favorite. Is that it now? Podcast favorite Miel Brado. I earned it? Yeah. Podcast favorite.

Friend of the pod. Friend of the pod. Fan fave. That's the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me. Is it really? Yeah. Oh my God.

You deserve so much better than that. Thank you. You're a real special person. Thank you so much. This is about me now. Was that nicer? What? The real special person? No. a real special person. Thank you so much. This is about me now. What? The real special person?

The real special person was a favorite of the podcast. Friend of the podcast was still. I mean, that's up there. I like real special. I think that's fun, though. No, I feel like I've been knighted by the friend of the podcast title.

I do. We should get a sword. We need a sword. You know what's crazy? You gotta get some swords. They're actually affordable. I didn't want to say it because I didn't want you guys

to think I was that dude, but I've been like wanting to swirl with swords. You know I was in Taekwondo for 12 years. I can teach you sword. I have sword patterns that I know.

because he pronounces it Taekwondo. Yeah, I know. It's not the first time you've dropped that in casual conversation. Second degree black belt, my friend. Second degree black belt,

Neil. Maybe we should draft swords next episode. We should draft swords. Because I really want a katana. I have like four swords in mind. No. Specific ones. Oh, I thought you were going to say at home. No, no, no. I katana. I have like four swords in mind. No. Specific ones.

Oh, I thought you were going to say at home. No, no, no. I did too. I was like, where the fuck are they? I do have four swords at home. I was like,

maybe I don't want to be a friend of this podcast. I can get to them in the dark. I know where the swords are with my eyes closed. I can get to them in the dark. I got the steps counted up. There's nowhere in the house

that I'm not three seconds away from a sword. Jesus Christ. That sucks. And you drank heavily at home until 5 a.m. the house that I'm not three seconds away from the sword. And you drank heavily at home till 5am. With those swords. I've done drugs with swords for sure. That is the worst name of a memoir ever. I've done drugs with swords for sure. Me and his team, Connor Marshall, did a bunch of acid with these samurai swords.

Oh, okay, go on. And then we just kept like, he was wearing coveralls. It was a weird night. And we just kept like hiding over our swords in our shirts and stuff. And being like, oh, yeah, man, totally cool. I'm just hanging out. I'm on acid with a sword! And we pull him out.

So you Wonder Woman'd it before Wonder Woman even came out. But just like for hours in a room. I was shocked no one died. Acid isn't the drug I wanted. Yeah, tons of people died. Be on lease with a sword, but it's up there. Yeah, but you hallucinate shit aggressively. You think that at first until you're on acid with a sword.

And it was all right. Yeah, if you go to my Instagram, there's a picture of that night and me and Connor are holding swords and it says, here's the thing about acid. Whoa. Oh. You manifest swords. I've held swords sober before and it says here's the thing about acid. Oh. Oh.

Manifest swords. I've held swords sober before and it changes you a little bit. Yeah, you feel like you could do way more cool stuff. Very powerful. Man, I'm bummed we're not drafting swords. We should.

I'm getting hiked on swords. We also gotta get some swords. That'd be crazy if we just called an audible right now. Fuck it, swords. Fuck it, we're doing swords. I don't know five kinds of swords.

I don't know that there are. We would need more than five because there'd be 20. That's what I'm worried about, yeah. I'd draft that glowing-ass one that knows when orcs are near. Is a lightsaber a sword? If you're just going to say a lightsaber,

it could be a sword. It's for sure a sword. Okay, swords. Round two, swords. What's another good one? I only know the one, what's the one, the broadsword from the Braveheart?

Oh, yeah, the Braveheart one? That's how King Tuff spreads his butter on his toast. Oh, yeah, with the broadsheart. Oh, yeah. The Braveheart one? That's how King Tuff spreads his butter on his toast. Oh, yeah. With a broadsword. Wait, hold on. Can I say also, I got this guy. Shout out to Jacob Brooks from Des Moines, Iowa. Yeah.

Call him Sioux Falls all you want, my friend. He just came out to see me in Des Moines, and he said he loved it. Oh, shout out to Jacob. Jacob, true friend of the podcast. Hell yeah. I was like, yeah, I'll give you a shout. I didn't. I offered him a shout out. He didn't he loved it. Oh, shout out to Jacob. Jacob, true friend of the podcast. Hell yeah. I was like, yeah, I'll give you a shout. I didn't, I offered him a shout out. He didn't even want it.

He was like, I work in an office. My life sucks. He wanted it. No, stop. Did he say that? It's because I did a joke about offices. It wasn't apropos. Did you just expose Jacob a little bit?

He loves it. That's where I was going, fuck you, Jacob. He loves it. That third voice is David Borey. Hey. The Gisland. The Gisland. The not silent G.

You should have never brought that up. Now I can't not see it. I'm not the one who brought it up. Someone brought it up to my attention. But you brought it to our attention. What is it? The Gisland? Well, his Twitter name is The G is Silent.

Which is the best Twitter name. That's a good one, yeah. But now I can't look at it without thinking The Gisland. Is that a bad thing, though? which is the best which is the best Twitter name that's a good one yeah but but now it could be now I can't look at it without thinking the jizzle one is that a bad thing though I mean it sounds like

a dope ass scepter it's also not a bad thing that's a good thing yeah like a cum scepter yeah a cum scepter there's my first sword

that I'm gonna draft the cum scepter the cum scepter I'm drafting the jizzle one that's for like bawdy tales of King Arthur's court you know you go to like

you go to the weapons store in the mall and you ask them for the cum scepter they got one in the back the fires of West Africa is that like a limp biscuit the cum scepter

everybody has to jack off onto this scepter and then I'll crown the king and the last person who finishes has to rule over the kingdom soggy scepter dude soggy scepter

we should move on. I'm sorry. We've never opened a drum like this before. Yeah, there's coffee all over my shirt. I wouldn't worry about it. You said you didn't have an opener, but there you go. There it is. It's that podcast. So, Summer Jams. We're drafting Summer Jams, and the way

we determine the draft order is through a raucous game of rock, paper, scissors. What type of draft is it? It's a serpentine draft. Thank you for bringing that up, David. So it's like, just imagine if you were a snake and you were going and you hit a wall. You just turn around

and go back the other way. In the first round, you draft first, kind of second. I hate this draft. Kind of slither as it goes. I'll be honest, I hate this order.

You hate it? It's a strong, it's never benefited me. Strong order. The serpentine? And mostly because I'm very bad at rock, paper, scissors. Rock, paper, scissors.

You are bad at it. David's good at it. I'm pretty good at it. Well, great. That doesn't make me feel better. I didn't know you could be bad at it. I can barely read. Rock, paper, scissors. You are bad at it. Dave is good at it. I'm horrible at it. You're bad at it. I'm pretty good at it. I don't know why.

That doesn't make me feel better. I didn't know you could be better. I can barely read. Don't worry. It all evens out. So the three of you are going to play rock, paper, scissors. All right. And you go on shoot, remember.

Okay. One, two, three, shoot. Okay. Here we go. Rock, paper, scissors, shoot. What? All papers. We do it again.

Rock, paper, scissors, shoot. And everybody's doing a different thing. Rock, paper, scissors, shoot. And everybody threw a different thing. Rock, paper, scissors, shoot. Fuck you. Fuck. God damn it. Rock, paper, scissors, shoot. Fuck you guys. Rock, paper, scissors, shoot.

Oh my God. What are the odds? I have thrown paper every time. It has either been... Let's go. Let's go. Okay. Rock, paper, scissors...

Wait, no, no. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. Rock, paper, scissors, shoot. David. Oh, David won. Okay. Thank God. I don't know. No, we lost. rock paper scissors shoot

David David won okay thank god I don't know that is the hardest two papers in a row got it which you know

that is the hardest our paper could cover that rock we together won we've never gone that far before whoa that was like

we haven't even gotten close I think it was all the sword talk it really got me amped in my rock paper scissors there's a lot of juices flowing in here everybody's hopped up there's an air of regality in the room I just tore my That was like We haven't even gotten close I think it was all the sword talk It really got me amped In my eye for scissor games There's a lot of juices

Flowing in here Everybody's hopped up There's an air of regality In the room I just tore my I just tore my ACL down I'm sweaty I don't have a rotator cuff

My heart's beating fast Can we just fucking start man I can't take it David David you are gonna determine The order of the draft And I will remind our listeners Okay

You probably want me to go first Right David Here's what I'm thinking Please let me right, David? Here's what I'm thinking. Please let me go in the middle. Here's what I'm thinking. It's so hard because it's like... I can barely read. Damn.

Because of my illiteracy. Here's what we're doing. We're doing clockwise starting from Ian. Okay. And then you're in the middle and then you're last, right? Is that counterclockwise? So it goes Ian, David, me, Alshon.

Is that counterclockwise? That's counterclockwise. I can't, I can't. Okay, counterclockwise. Whatever illiterate it is for clockwise, that's what I am. Okay, no, I'm, I double down. I just can't.

You name it, I can't read it. Righty tighty. Thank you very much for letting me go in the middle. No problem. You're a true and kind God. You got Ian go first alright no because I have a feeling

that I think this is gonna work out what's wrong with Ian nothing you're amazing I just wanted to go first so bad I don't think I'm gonna take what you were gonna take

I don't I wonder how much crossover there will be five bucks says Sean takes Aerosmith I don't wanna miss a thing all five picks I woke Sean up yesterday

by playing Great Malenko real loud. It's okay. Pause it. Listen to Great Malenko and tell me the beat's not good. It is a good beat. It's a solid beat. It's everything else.

Yeah, it's thick, dude. Yeah. That's like, oh, it's a good broth, but the soup is mostly Legos. It's like a good chicken broth, but it's mostly Legos and Mike and Ike's. Jesus. A lot of micro machines in there. But the broth, though.

Just toddler stew, baby. Six-year-old David would have tried it. With the first pick of the Summer Jam All Fantasy Everything Graphs. Wearing sunglasses, by the way. I'm wearing sunglasses and a backwards hat. I select Ice Cubes, in parentheses, OJ Jackson's. Today was a good day. Nice.

What summer was that? I want to say 94, 95. Let's have a look. Let's have a look on the internet. Is anyone surprised by this pick? No. No. I think it's just a really solid.

Maybe pedestrian. Solid pick. No. No. I think it's just a really solid. Maybe pedestrian is a solid pick. Damn. Okay. Found a way to say something mean about a really good pick. First of all,

pedestrians are valuable, all right? They're not, I mean, walking is one of the most, I don't know, green ways to get somewhere. Yeah.

We're in a smog-filled city. I looked up like four or five, I just Googled summer, like best summer jams to see what other people said and every single person chose that one as their first pick. I didn't look it up at all. This is just from the heart.

I did, and I didn't see. So you're not trying to be a cliche. You just are. Oh. God damn it. It's R. It hurts so much more when they're like, it's not even your fault that you're wet.

Can we talk about how great the song is? It's an amazing song. It's a great song. I just think people lose the draft element of this, and there has to be some shit talking. Yeah, that's true. I feel like I'm just trying to keep things interesting. That's 100 amazing song. It's a great song. I just think people lose the draft element of this, and there has to be some shit talking. Nah, that's true. I feel like I'm just trying to keep things interesting. That's 100% true.

But none about this, because it's an amazing song. Here's the thing that wins me out about Today Was a Good Day. He wakes up early. Yeah. You know? And he gets fucked up at the end. He gets fucked up at the end of the night. That was a long day for Ice Cube.

Did you have any friends? There was probably 10 friends I had that would always put their name in, like, and it said, Micah Shelton's a pimp. If you don't put your name in it, you're a coward. So many friends. Right? I do that, and when I'm singing a karaoke, when I do

the Four Non Blondes song, What's Up, I put in my age, whatever it is. Oh, really? 32 years, my life is still, whatever my age. And I've done it since I was like 20. So I've done it when I was younger all the way to way older. When you went in the single digits, you couldn't fill that space possibly. I didn't even know that.

Seven years of my life is still. Seven works. If I saw a seven-year-old doing that song, I'd be like, say whatever. Why are you a karaoke seven-year-old boy? This is a bar. Bad parents. They're over there playing the vidlads.

You know, another insert I used to have on this when I was a kid living in Tacoma, Washington. Living in Tacoma. Hell yeah, Washington. Yeah.

I would say, it's ironic. I had the boosh, he had the chronic. The Lakers beat the MNS team that wasn't the Supersonics. Oh, you wouldn't say

the Supersonics. I'd say like the Cavaliers or some shit. Fuck that rhyme scheme. Yeah, fuck it all to hell. On the World Wide Web, they have broken down what day he was talking about. Really? I can't remember, but somebody went in,

the Lakers played the Supersonics X amount of times, and like, da-da-da. So it was historically accurate? You'd have to be able to see the... Cube felt on the big fat fanny. Pulled out the jammie. What year did Cube get a triple-double at a pickup basketball game?

I'm going to tell you, I don't think he's ever done that. No. I'm guessing no. Even in pickup, that's still a... He might have done that plan with his crew where they're like, Cube, man, dope triple-double deal. Who could verify that? We're not the first people to say it, but who keeps track of

rebounds? Exactly! In a pickup game? Who assists in a pickup game? Somebody doesn't play very much. It's like their title of fame. If you watch the video, he's playing in like a full Pendleton. He is. He's playing in a Pendleton in jeans.

In LA in the summertime. He's flexing hard. Yeah, it's so hot though. I don't sweat. How did Pendleton's catch on in LA? That's crazy. I don't know, man. And full khaki suits. Can you imagine? Oh, do you know how many times I've imagined? I often imagine. I imagine every day. I used to wear khaki suits

to middle school. I had to sneak in the shirt. No, no, no, no. Is that true? Yeah. You had to sneak it in because your mom wouldn't let you. And you were like, no, no, no, I know better. It had to sneak it in because your mom wouldn't let you. And you were like, no, no, no. I know better. It was like a gang thing. So I'd sneak in the shirt.

Like I'd put it in my bag or something. So you'd have big ass khaki pants on. And like a white t-shirt. Wait, in what town? Sioux Falls, South Dakota. So that was a gang thing in Sioux Falls, South Dakota. That was a gang thing everywhere, sister. I'm not splitting the atom by saying that.

It's funny that it was a gang thing in Sioux Falls. I'll give you that. Got it, got it. But gang thing everywhere. Because to me, it sounds like you just said, I used to sneak in a full-on pinstriped suit to school. Oh, no, Dickie's suit. That would be funnier.

I wasn't Shug Knight when I was in middle school. It was a suit suit? Oh, I thought of you as like a... You're just a pants that look like an ear. One of the Sean Jordans, eh? My mom wouldn't let me wear the seersucker so I didn't get it. I'm over in the corner

flipping a coin. I'll go to class when I feel like a motherfucker. Tell me what to do again, Mr. Burdus. I'm going to go to math class where I can learn how to subtract you.

I'll give you detention. I'll give you forehead detention with some hot lead. I love this character. Yeah, I like this a lot. This is me. The whole rest of it's been a character my whole life. But this is actually who I am.

Gangs are crazy because they turn khaki suits into something dangerous. That's why I didn't know this connotation. There's nothing lamer than a khaki suit. It made me want to go to Fatburger. I don't know, dude. Look at khaki suits right now. It's pretty cool. Yeah, but khaki in general is whack, right?

I think Obama brought it back a little bit. Janitors and Crips. That's who wears full on khaki suits. Today is a Good Day is an aspirational song. It is. It makes you want to have a dope ass summer day. It really does. It really does.

Quintessential, some might say. Quintessential, yeah. He did all the good things you could do in a day. He did. And some stuff I don't want to do I don't want all the lyrics memorized did he eat like a

really cold rip your float no he didn't and there's one thing missing see that is actually what I'm saying you don't have the

lyrics memorized because that ain't one of them I think so so he did everything you want to do and then I pulled up to the spot and ate

a cold ass root beer float ate? drank? what do you do with a root beer float do you eat it or drink it

it depends on the pace so how old do you do with a root beer float? do you eat it or drink it? it just runs on the pace so how old do you think Ice Cube was in this song? 25 in 1992? and he had sex with a girl he's been trying to fuck since the 12th grade

so he's been gunning for this for 7 years the other thing is it was ironic it feels like 25 to me I can see that that's the 12th grade I bet that's right

cause when you're early 20s summer doesn't mean enough yet cause it's still too close to high school right. Because when you're in your early 20s, summer doesn't mean enough yet. Because it's still too close to high school. Right. And you're still working in those early 20s. You don't know how to work and enjoy the summer. Yes. And then by your mid-20s, you're like, oh, I got to kick back sometimes.

Yeah, yeah. Got it. One of the best things that's ever happened to me is getting fired two days before the 4th of July. Oh, shit. When I was like 17. Yeah. It's one of the best. Like, I worked at QFC.

Nice. Quality Food Center. Quality Food Center. Yeah. Shout out to the white chocolate macadamia nut cookies. Right to the street chicken. Yeah. For some reason, I thought I had an hour lunch.

I don't know. I don't know why I came up with it. What? What made you think that? I don't want that to be the reason you got fired. I just hope you interjected that. Like, for some reason, I thought an hour lunch, and then I stole $200. How did that go?

He was like, Ian, you had a 10-minute break, and you're like, it wasn't an hour lunch? It wasn't my third hour lunch of the day. You just got here. It's 8 in the morning. I thought how many lunches we took was up to our discretion. What happened to trust? Listen, I was hungry. So you bought yourself a whole watermelon, corn on the cob, a hot dog.

I ate a whole watermelon. You were like, it's summer, baby. You know what's the wackest thing? Well, yeah, I did. I, like, did. I, like, had such a good fun. I think me and my friend Nick Nampe launched Roman candles at each other. What?

Yes, I've been involved in that. Oh, yeah. I'm sorry for screaming, but that is so dangerous. We stood on opposite sides of a field. I hit him in the face, and he rushed me. One of my best friends, he rushed me like he was going to kill me. And I was like, dude, dude, we're having a part of the deal. You hit him in the face with a Roman candle?

You hit him in the face? Well, I didn't mean to. Like, we were pointing him at each other. And it's like you sign a contract with the Roman candle. Well, you just pointed him at you, too? I'm sorry. Is this just like the difference between boys versus girls? Because this is deeply upsetting to me that you guys fired these at each other.

Yeah, Roman candles. Yeah, no. Fireworks, you've got to shoot your friends. I remember one time, good Fourth of July story. Me and these kids were in what the Migos now call a bando. We just called it an abandoned house back then. And we were all in the living room, and we stood in a circle. And we took the bottle.

I like where it's going. We took the stick off the bottle rocket, and then we lit it and threw it in the middle of the circle. And if you jumped away, you're a bitch. You're a coward. Oh, my God. See, when my family would light off fireworks as a child, I'd watch them through the window of the closed front door because I was too scared.

So this is crazy to me. Oh, no, ma'am. Me and my friends used to, like, customize fireworks and shit like that. Oh, yeah, with the electrical tape, the black tape. If you take a whistling peat and you, like, break it you break it up, if you smash it up a little bit, and then you wrap it over the electrical tape, it turns into an M-80. You're going to stand there. Oh, my God.

Did you put fertilizer in them, too? Where does this end? You just built bombs for fun? You put it in your federal building because we're upset with the government. I got this scar in my hand because a black cat blew up in there. Fuck that. It's not as bad as you think, though. It just goes, thump. And then I in my hand because a black cat blew up in there. Fuck that. It's not as bad as you think, though. It just goes, foomp.

And then I opened my hand. It's bad, dude. It hurts. And it was just like this huge, what do you call it? Like a blister? Burn? Yeah, like a huge blister. But now you can barely even tell.

That sounds so bad. You just scarred for life. No big deal. I made a little chair out of tinfoil and put a G.I. Joe in it. It was an electric chair. We got a bunch of those things that would flash real bright a G.I. Joe in it it was an electric chair we got a bunch of those things that would flash real bright oh my god

and then after you blew it up you go I gotta say it was a good day it melted them did you also kill animals maybe you have a basement full of corpses now this is boy mischief you just invented an electric chair yeah but that's like boy mischief

it's not like psychopath boy mischief it feels like psychopath boy mischief And the G.I. Joe did murder three or four people. I shot explosives at my friends for fun. What? It's just like, boys will be boys. You're gonna steal stuff. You're gonna break some stuff. I only killed other boys that were exactly six months older than I was when I was younger.

I don't even know what that means. That scares the shit out of me. It means exactly what it sounds like. I murdered other boys that were exactly six months older. Those are not good days. Sorry. Those were the bad ones. Those were the best days. It really just does have everything, just to go back to the song for one second.

Everything I want to do on a summer day. Just for what the podcast is entirely about. Yeah. It involves basketball. Sure. Yeah. Watching Yo! MTV raps. Yeah.

What do we love more than watching music videos? Yeah. And then a breakfast with no hog. Yeah. I would have had a hog. I would have probably hog. Yeah. I would have had a hog. I would probably have a hog. I would have had a little hog. I don't know why

that was a good thing. Also, he made a bunch of money shooting dice, which is a good feeling. Yeah. Shout out to the Milk Bar crew. What? I've never made money

shooting dice. If you come to San Francisco with me, I'll take you to a place where they roll funny dice and we'll make you some money. I don't know what anything you guys

are saying means, but that's fine. San Francisco has a place in the Bay, like by Oakland? I've heard some money. I don't know what anything you guys are saying means, but that's fine. San Francisco has a play that's in the Bay, like by Oakland. I've heard of it. I don't think Goodyear would have put pimp

on their blimp. They might have. What year was it? I feel like they would have gotten in hot water for that. It definitely didn't say Ice Cube's a pimp when Goodyear didn't know

who Ice Cube was at that time. They probably don't now. Oh, Goodyear didn't know who Ice Cube was. That's a crazy thing for you to say. David, sit down. David is upset.

I love you, but that's fucked up, dude. The tire company? They fucking knew. Everybody knew. He was on their radar. I'm straight out of college. Everybody knew who Ice Cube was. I'm yelling.

The second time I was wrong in my life. What do you want to do? I apologize. What was the first time? It was because I thought I was wrong once. Oh. So my first pick is today was a good day. A fairly pedestrian pick, according to some sources.

That's what I hear. With the second pick of the All Fantasy Everything Summer Jam draft, David Boy. Okay, so I got two ways I can go. Okay, I got one. I'm just going to throw it out there. I'm going to see how you guys feel about it. You don't want it?

I can take it back. Oh, no. Can you? Do you remember that song? You can't give Tim Tebow back. You know, you draft it. You don't want it? I can take it back. Oh, no. Can you? Can you? Do you remember that song? You can't give Tim Tebow back. You know, you draft it. You draft it, my friend. That's a good point.

Yeah, but we didn't know whether it's whether or not Tim Tebow plays football is what I'm asking right now. Let's see it. So do you remember that Mazda commercial where the little boy says, zoom, zoom? Of course. And then they say, zoom, zoom, zoom. And then the guy's like, yeah, Zoom, Zoom, Zoom. What are you about to do?

You want to draft that song? What if you just bring that up and then draft a completely unrelated song? Yeah, I was just thinking about this Mazda commercial anyway. Really? Commercial? It was dope. Anyway. So I want to draft that song.

And here's the back story before you jump on my dick. You've got to have a name for the song. The song is called Zoom, Zoom, Zoom. Three Zooms. But it's spelled Z-U-M, Z-U-M, Z-U-M. It's the title of a capoeira song made popular by the 1994 movie Only the Strong. Like we didn't watch that either.

For whose soundtrack it was recorded by Jabri Serapis-Bey. It was one of the Serapis Bay recordings which appeared on the soundtrack to the film. Another recording of Zoom Zoom Zoom was made by the band Spank in the year 2000 for the Mazda car commercials in conjunction with

the company's slogan Zoom Zoom. That summer I was grounded pretty much the whole summer. Is this in the Wikipedia the listeners, David just read a tattoo off his inner thigh that we didn't know he had. I was grounded this whole summer for various nefarious

deeds. Various nefarious deeds. And I just watched that commercial a million times and I just loved that song. Okay, so you're choosing the spank version specifically. The spank version specifically. The spank version that they redid. Not the capoeira movie.

I don't believe in capoeira necessarily. You don't believe in Brazilian dance fighting? You believe in saying it the right way, I'll tell you that right now. I don't believe in all those words mixing together. Capoeira. That one is fake. We're sitting at the crib one night.

Yeah, it's super fake. Sitting at the crib and Ian's flipping through Netflix. HBO. Might have smoked some weed. I was under the influence one night. That's super fake. Sitting in the crib and Ian's flipping through Netflix. HBO. Might have smoked some weed. I was under the influence of the devil's lettuce. Yeah. Have fun in hell, my friend.

So he stops on Only the Strong and he's like, what do you think? And I was like, really? And so five minutes in, I was like, are we going to watch this? We watched the whole thing.

How was it? A dance fighting movie. What a full circle conversation. It was good. Here's my thing. It's just a movie about Kappa where it's like the Zander City School in Miami. Zoom, Zoom, Zoom as good in this, though.

What? I don't remember that song in that movie one bit. It wasn't as memorable as the Mazda commercial. Also, how are you going to dance your way out of this right cross to the chest? You can't do that in Capoeira. That's what I'm saying, but you can do it in the streets.

Yeah, but you don't use Capoeira to fight street fighters. You use it to fight other Capoeira fighters. Oh, is it only in... You're both pronouncing it so well. I feel like every time you guys say Capoeira, it gets a little slower. I'm not good. You're like she studied it for 10 years. I'm not good. I'm from a hippie island, and so I just know it from context clues. You say Capoeira the way he says

taekwondo. Taekwondo. Taekwondo. I have a buddy who swears by it though. I don't say like somebody who's waiting for a tiny cup of coffee. Yes you should. Taekwondo. Also if you guys don't want to count that as a song. No it's on. I wrote it down. You took it. It's done. David Twitter wouldn't

be happy if you didn't make a ridiculous pick. I know I had to come out top with you really could have put that fifth. You could have taken that fifth for sure. I tell you what, that was a Tiffany. We could draft 50 different things. That wouldn't make it onto any of my lists. Literally not. Yeah, I realize now. I get so excited on the first one. I was like,

I made this list at the airport at Des Moines, Iowa at 4 o'clock this morning. We could have drafted car commercial songs and that wouldn't have made it on my list. That's crazy. That's crazy. You don't remember the commercial five pick on a car commercial. You don't remember the commercial?

Of course I remember it. But I wasn't like, I want to download that song. Did you not love that song? Of course not. Did not everybody love it? I thought it was like an American. This is very specific to you. You were grounded and you watched the commercial a million times. I would have taken da, da, da first.

Da, da, da. Yeah. Remember that one? No. It was like a Volkswagen commercial. I would have just chosen the Hello Moto and nothing else. Oh, Hello Moto is pretty good. Not a car though.

You can't drive that. Cell phone song. You can order an Uber with a phone. You can put some prepaid. Phoenix 1901. That was a KLR commercial jam. Oh, yeah. Or that Postal Service song.

We Will Become Silhouettes. Yeah, no, okay. Fuck me, guys. No, I understand. It's rad Well um Not much to say About Zoom Zoom Zoom Zoom

A kid whispering It's very creepy Zoom Zoom He was excited though It gets David hard For summer man He hears Zoom Zoom And he's like

I need a hot dog now It just makes me think Of like summertime And watching the shitty Q13 Fox afternoon movie That's like a sad Ass summer dude I was in a lot of trouble You were grounded Did you have a Did you have an ankle monitor Or were you just like in the shitty Q13 Fox afternoon movie. That's like a sad ass summer, dude.

I was in a lot of trouble. Did you have an ankle monitor or were you just like grounded? No, man, they tried to like... So like I... Sounds like you're cooking up a lie, my friend. The truth comes right out. There's not a good way to say it that doesn't make me sound like a scumbag.

You blew up a black cat in your hand? No, I just ditched most of fifth grade and then I got caught. And then it was like a whole thing. So your favorite summer memory and your favorite jam is from that summer. It means a lot to me. It means a lot to me. It can't mean a lot to me.

It can. It can. I also can judge you for it. I mean, it's judgeable. It's judgeable. Should I have gone first with it? No, judge you for it. I mean, it's judgeable. It's judgeable. And should I have gone first with it? No. Yes, no, actually, I respect it.

No, they're going to drag me across the coals on the internet. Dude, we could fill the Grand Canyon with shit I shouldn't have done last night. So it's like, you know. Fair enough. For real. It's all right. It's all right. Not a big, not a big.

Fair enough. So second pick, Tsum Tsum. Tsum Tsum. Well, the judger will become the judge now. Oh, let's all right. Not a big. Fair enough. So second pick, Tsum Tsum. Tsum Tsum. Well, the judger will become the judge now. Oh, let's see. The Albrados. Let's see what you got. Try to talk shit.

First pick of the summer jam. Because I thought about this. I'm so excited to talk shit. I want to talk you through how I got here. Take us on a walk. I want to listen. My first knee jerk was all the summer jams that I listened to growing up. And then I realized, well, I can't possibly cover 28 years of summer jams.

Sure. So that's not a very good methodology. Then I went, well, what to this day still gets me hard for summer? Word. And I so happened to realize that it's a song from every decade. Don't you dare. Spanning back to the 60s. Oh, look at you.

A song from every decade. I mean, kind of every decade. Okay. I didn't get early 2000s because it was too obvious, in my opinion. So I'm going to start in modern summer jams you're talking shit before we even picked that song from the early 00s

you already talked shit about it I'm just saying I'm starting with the most recent summer jam for me that it comes on very very top

that's the other thing summer jams gotta hook me from the beginning I gotta feel like I'm driving away from school going fuck this I'm free every time

I'm gonna smoke a bunch of weed yep I'm gonna eat a whole watermelon I'm gonna go skate I'm gonna kill a kid from another school I'm gonna jump in the fucking, yeah. Every time. I'm going to smoke a bunch of weed. Yep. I'm going to eat a whole watermelon. I'm going to go skate. I'm going to kill a kid from another school. I'm going to jump in the fucking lake naked. Isn't it crazy how, before you make the, just how much influence school still has on us

as adults? 100%. Yes. When I see back to school commercials, I get bummed out. Me too. I'm like, fuck. I get anxiety. Yeah.

And we live in LA. It's summer here all the time. And we do comedy. And we do comedy. It's summer forever. Ugh. I haven't worked a day in my life Okay so

I'm kicking it off with The Less I Know The Better By Tame Impala Oh I don't even know that song There we go Man The bass line

Oh yes It's You literally It comes You probably wouldn't Like put it on Cause like you've heard it a lot But when it comes on

You're a victim to it You just go Okay Here we go Are you a Tame Impala guy? I need somebody to sing it. Oh, the best I know, the better. It's like mostly the instrumentation

that makes it good. The bass is like fantastic. You guys sing at the same time. You play the bass and you sing. Someone said they lived together. Okay, I do know that song. For everybody listening, you probably thought Tame Impala was here for a second. And it actually was just Mielinian. Yeah, I think they might have a mouth band.

It was not Tame Impala. I feel like you could tell people you play bass for Tame Impala and they'd be like, oh. You could. They'd be like, oh, crazy. You know, they gotta have a bass player. If I bought a leather bracelet. You could have told me that today. I would have been like that today oh yeah cool man

if I bought a leather bracelet I feel like I'd get away with it you could get away with a bracelet we're too big to have any type of leather accessories especially like a thick leather bracelet I don't even like having a leather wallet it would turn your arm brown

I got a camouflage wallet you got camouflage shorts too yeah it's a lifestyle I stand by my choice it's a lifestyle. I stand by my choice. It's a great song. Thank you. It's a fantastic song. Yeah, yeah.

It just makes me feel like summer started in my adult life. I'm not mean, so I have nothing angry to say. Well, this isn't as fun, then. You guys should be mean. Don't you know this is entertaining to be mean? I'll say, here's my problem with that song, is that an ex-girlfriend got me into it, and I'm still mad about it. Fair enough.

Fair enough. Can't respond to that. But it's an amazing song. I can't really... It is summery, too, now that I mad about it. Fair enough. Fair enough. But it's an amazing song. I can't really... It is summery too now that I think about it. Put it on when you leave and you're going to be like,

summer has begun, my friend. And it's the solstice. What is it? Yeah, it's the solstice on... No, it's 21st. Two days, three days. Anyway, that'll be the day to do it. You watch the solstice parade.

You jam. You know what? I just exposed that I'm from an island. You probably don't have solstice parades. It's a big deal on the island. Is that where you do magic? You go to a solstice parade. You jam. You know what? I just exposed that I'm from an island. You probably don't have a solstice parade. It's a big deal on the island. Is that where you do magic? You go to a solstice parade.

There's magic with a K. You listen to Unless I Know The Batter. It's wonderful. It's great. You need to leave the blood on your face for a week.

You drink unpasteurized milk. Yes. You chew it. You commune with an orca. That's what they used to call me back in the days on pasteurized milk. They called me

Ross Cutlery, dude. Can I share two things with you that I've come up with recently? What if we said no? They're just lifestyle modders. Of course. Me, I was just like, no, you can't. Let's move on. Sean, ask me how I'm doing.

Hey, dog, how you doing? Well, let me just say this. I'm living La Dolce Vita and La Vida Loca at the same time. Wait, did you say La Dolce De Leche? La Dolce Vita and La Vida Loca at the same time. Is that Carmel Life? The Sweet Life. Right? The Sweet Life.

La Dolce Vita, The Sweet Life. The Sweet Life and The Crazy Life. At the same damn time. I was going to say the Milk Life for a second. I ate ice cream while I poured hot candle wax on my tits. That makes sense. That's La Dolce Vita and La Vida Loca at the same time. Is that what you do at the Summer Solstice Parade? Yes. One of the many things. I don't know while I poured hot candle wax on my tits. That makes sense. That's La Dolce Vita and La Vida Loca. Is that what you do at the summer solstice parade? Yes. One of the many things.

I don't know if I've ever poured hot candle wax. You haven't lived. Necessarily. You haven't lived. You pour it. You know, I drip it. Fill your belly button with it. Right in there.

Whoa, that would be hilarious. I have a deep one. Just see how deep it goes. I could fill it with candle wax. Put a wick in there Yeah Whatever shape Right

Belly candles When I get rich When I get famous That's how I'm gonna get rich I got merch You're correcting yourself Like you're gonna be famous But not rich

Is what I got out of that You go When I get rich Wait When I get famous I'm gonna be famous For his belly candles But nobody's buying them

So they're not gonna make any money Products not moving I buy one Oh yeah dude David's custom to make any money. I'd buy one. David's custom belly button shaped candle. I'll design one. I'm excited about it. Sean, ask how my trip to London was. How was your trip to London?

It was a trip filled with pleasure, leisure, and treasure. I hate that. I want to veto that now. So those are just two. Yeah, I don't know if I like that second one as much. Those are just two. Is that true? But like self-aware. Did you find treasure? I did. Bullshit. Unless you mean like the Bruno Mars type of treasure.

The treasure was friendship. Okay. Sometimes the experience is the treasure. I honestly want to leave. Pleasure, leisure, and treasure. The treasure is what makes me mad. It kind of feels like fingers on the same hand yeah

pleasure, leisure, and treasure fingers on the same hand okay that was really poetic I don't know what I thought you said it's not a big deal not as deep as my belly button

but getting there so the less I know the better it's a fantastic song is the music video racist? have you seen the music video? I remember the beginning it's in like a high school

it's in a high school so it's this dude who's got like a crush on this girl, but then like she wants to date a gorilla, like a literal gorilla. And he's trying to steal her away from this gorilla. I'm going to say the fact that you asked if that was racist is a little self-reflecting of your racism. Is it? Why does it show Taylor Smith when I say the last name of the girl?

Swift. Swift. Did you just say this part? Your name was Taylor Smith. Honestly, it might as well be. You say it like you're saying different words and I don't understand why you're saying it. Taylor Smith.

All white names sound the same. That sounds like a dude who was going to be the quarterback. Oh, he got beat up by a sophomore. Yeah, his dad sent him to prep school in Belgium, but he was going to be a quarter of a 10. Taylor Smith in Belgium? Prep school in Belgium?

Taylor Smith. I still don't understand. That's more like halfway through it. I still don't understand this joke. It's Swift. What the fuck is going on? She's like the most famous person in the world. I don't know if it's racist. I've never seen it. What the fuck is going on? He's like the most famous person in the world.

I don't know if it's racist. I've never seen it. I'm just saying it's a little bit weird. It's post-Harambe, right? It is post-Harambe. As long as he's not playing basketball. He is literally playing basketball. Now we're getting into some treacherous territory. I'm just saying.

I don't understand what's going on. I need to be woken up to this racism in this music video. into some treacherous territory. I'm just saying. I don't understand what's going on. So, male pick a racist song. Yeah, I need to be woken up to this racism in this music video of the song I chose for this draft.

The kids are saying woke, actually. Need to be woke. I mean, I'm not, I wouldn't know if I'm a kid. I guess I'm probably the most of a kid here.

So, yeah, sure. I speak for children. Yeah, I'm 35. What do you know? Rounding out the first round.

So, my first pick is A young 35. Body of a 32-year- year old baby I was just telling you I've been liking saying young Before people's names 35 years Filled with pleasure, leisure and treasure

So pick number one for me I have a feeling that one of us Is going to call it pedestrian But I don't care It's going to be Summertime by Will Smith Pedestrian Oh my god I would call it pedestrian But that's high praise For what you just did It's going to be Summertime by Will Smith. Pedestrian. Oh my God. I would call it Pedestrian, but that's high praise for what you just did.

It's the absolute best summer song. I'm not with you two. That shit's still. Hustle to the Mall to get you a short set? That song is great. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, I got on sneaks, but I need a new pair. I love that song.

You know why? It's basketball, courts, and summer got girls there. Am I mixed up? You don't like the pick. Listen. I don't think you've listened to it recently. We're talking about course and summer got girls there. Am I mixed up? You don't like the pick. Listen. I don't think you've listened to it recently. We're talking about two summer things here. Okay.

Is the song good? It's an amazing song. Absolutely. No denying that. Is it a good draft pick if you're trying to choose the ultimate summer jam playlist that's not already available on Spotify as a playlist? I can't believe. What?

I'm just saying I think originality counts. You added an addendum on it. No, we're just trying to win. Nail's got an agenda. Listen, Tom Brady's boring as fuck. He's still great. You know what's cool about Spotify is Taylor Smith just put all her music on it. I don't understand this joke.

If you made these drafts into Spotify playlists, and you threw a kickback, first summer kickoff kickback, and you put on each playlist, when Summertime by Will Smith came on, I think a handful of people at the party would go, oh, come on. Especially because they were just dancing so hard to Zoom, Zoom, Zoom. And I'd be like, what the fuck is this? Oh, that's just the YouTube ad before the dope song.

Summertime by Will Smith. It's, to me, I can't believe that it sat on the table for three picks you can have it you can fucking have it we heard Dame Impala we heard a fucking car commercial not Summertime by Will Smith

I you know it doesn't make me feel like summer it makes me think of Will Smith and that's fine it makes me actually think of Jazzy Jeff which is weird

yeah what happened to him he oh he DJs I saw him at the mezzanine in San Francisco he's awesome he's awesome

two miles an hour so everybody sees you. Come on. I like that their moms are in the video. Yeah. Yeah. And then they got that shot

where they're like sitting on like yard furniture but it's clearly on the flatbed of a truck and they're just like cruising down the highway. And I just like six o'clock rolls around.

Because that is a good feeling. You're like you're going to go out and you got a whip you're like oh shit six o'clock is like when the night starts

oh man that's when our night starts I'm gonna throw an industry term at you the magic hour where does it start on the islands um

like nine nine whoa it doesn't get dark for a long time no but you're supposed to go out right when the sun's

kind of like hanging like you hated my guts because I'm just being a dick it's you're supposed to go out right when the sun's kind of like... That look is like you hated my guts. Because I'm just being a dick. It's never started to sink. You're supposed to go... When Michael Jordan jumps, it's that moment right before he starts descending. That's when you want to go out in the evening.

Well, let that be. That flashy green when the sun sets. It's like, oh my God, is he flying? It's where the jump man is. It's where the jump man lives. Jump man o'clock. It's hard for me to understand because there was no nightlife on the island. So my summers were like jumping in the ocean. Yeah. Jumpman o'clock. It's hard for me to understand because there was no nightlife on the island. So my summers were like jumping in the ocean.

Yeah. Climbing a tree. You never had that weird summertime, so-and-so's folks are gone and we're going to barbecue because we're kind of adult, but not really. No. We roll in at 10. You were never riding around in your Jeeps or your Benzos? Or your Nissan Sunroof.

Is Zuzu Trooper? Is Zuzu Trooper anyone? That's similar. With like a Madrona log for a bumper? Was that the only Is Zuzu Trooper? Is Zuzu Trooper anyone? That's similar. With like a Madrona log for a bumper? Was that the only car that Zuzu made? I don't know actually.

But it had moss growing on all the cracks in it. I know that much. That's fun though. Is it? I like that. I don't know.

It sounds a little more fun to do to Benzos. I heard that word said. Only if you're sitting on Lorenzos though. What does that mean? What are Lorenzos? Are those tires? I don't know. Did you say Lorenzo? Maybe it's his friend's lap on Lorenzo's, though. What does that mean? Are those tires?

I don't know. Did you say Lorenzo? Maybe it's his friend's lap? Lorenzo's oil. Sitting on Lorenzo. What if he was just sitting on his friend's lap? We can't fit everybody in the Trooper. You gotta sit on Lorenzo's lap.

See, that actually does feel like summer to me. Lorenzo never wears a shirt, by the way. No! Oh, it's super time! Lorenzo, it's 10 degrees outside. Lorenzo never wears a shirt, by the way. No! He's always sticky. Lorenzo, it's 10 degrees outside. I wish I could just draft Otter Pops, to be honest. Oh, Otter Pops. All right, second pick.

Summertime by Will Smith. Fair enough. I think it's a fantastic pick. I don't mind it. It is. I do mind it. Catch me giving a fuck if anyone minds it. It is a bit on the nose.

It is a bit on the nose, It is a bit on the nose, but what a nose. It's pedestrian some might say. Fair enough. So the second pick, I'll flip it on its ear then. Second pick in the serpentine draft.

Great Malenko. It's going to be... By the insane clown posse. By the wacky circus gang. Who's going chicken hunting? We's going chicken hunting. Seen it live. Chicken hunting's like the summer, yeah.

It's going to be Steal My Sunshine by Len. God damn it. What the fuck am I supposed to do? What am I even here for? What am I even here for? Why are you mad at that? I don't know, man.

I'm just pissed. I hate that. I hate that. I don't know, man. I'm just pissed. I hate that video. I hate that dude who looks like a knockoff from the LFO dude. He is.

He totally is. He's an LFO reject! Stupid fucking scooter! I know! It's up to me! Listen If you didn't wear the Yankees hat Try not to fall in the Yankees You know you can hate it all you want but turns out you know everything about this video so you can't hate it that much

Yeah it was on TOL! I was grounded that summer! You heard Tsum Tsum! I was grounded that summer! I fucking see the video a million times! When you say that somebody stole your grounded that summer. You heard Tsum Tsum. I was grounded that summer. I fucking see the video a million times. When you say that somebody stole your sunshine that summer. I'm not going to play this game. I'm going to take the high road. Honestly, I think you just sent me into a temporary fugue state. I feel really bad right now.

That made me really upset. Look, I love that song. I love it. It made me so upset. That's how you know it's a good pick, though. You split the room. It's the worst. Why does it start with people talking?

Hey, Mike, why does it do that? Again, why do you know everything about it, though? Because I had the whole album. There you go. Because they didn't sell the single, and I was like, oh, I'll buy this. And also, like, I was cruising down the beach. There's no voice. He's literally pushing air out of his throat.

Once in the morning, L-A-T-E-R that week. Okay, I do hate it. Never mind. You're the one song in the world. And it doesn't make me feel like sunshine and fucking daisies. It makes me feel like, who the fuck is singing right now? I want to kick their ass. It makes me feel like you guys didn't get into LFO.

Let's say that you're my girlfriend Tammy in high school and we went to Thunder Road to go mini golfing. That's what was planned. Well, I certainly wouldn't give you head golfing. That's what was planned. Well, I certainly wouldn't give you head in that scenario because that song was playing. Damn! You gave it to H.J., son! Tammy, clap back.

Tammy didn't give it to me either. She gave it to everybody else, but not me. And because that fucking song was playing. Because you were playing land. Because you were kind of swinging your hips to it. It's a good day. Maybe I'm like, oh, that's kind of, okay, I get it. But if that had been playing, she definitely would have given you a hummer. Just saying. Damn, dog. Fucking land? No one fucks to land. That can't be a summer jam. maybe I'm like oh that's kind of okay okay get it but if I had been playing she definitely would have given you a hummer just saying

damn dog fucking land no one fucks to land that can't be a summer jam that's blowjob science you can't beat that I don't fuck to music first of all

that's your mistake that's your mistake I fuck to Henry Kissinger's speeches I fuck to the whispers of my lover and nothing else that's another great book title no just the whispers

of my lover I don't fuck to music sure sure okay That's another great book title. Fuck off! No, just The Whispers of My Lover. I don't fuck to music. Sure, sure, okay. I'm learning a lot about you. The only song I'll fuck to is Slam Bionics. The Whispers of My Lover. Slam Bionics. Did you say Slam Bionics?

Let the boys be boys. Only song I fuck to. I'll fuck to hardcore East Coast hip-hop. And we're all in the room when it happens. Yeah. Yeah, Sean. Check out, bro. Oh, you don't want to fuck to Money Power Respect by the Locks?

They just, everyone knows you're fucking because they hear Slam by Onyx blasting from your bedroom. And I'm screaming about it, too. Wait, does that mean you have to finish in three minutes, too? I got to tell you. It's on repeat. Oh, the song's almost over. I'm sorry.

You didn't get to. Well, the great thing is he has to shoot a gun and he has to bust his gun. First of all, who has sex for longer than three minutes? That's crazy. The song's almost over. I'm sorry. You didn't get to. The thing is, he has to shoot a gun. First of all, who has sex for longer than three minutes? That's crazy. That's not called sex. That's called a marathon. That's crazy. Or a movie.

Who has the time? Yeah, what are they? There's a new season of Flamenco. What was that movie you were mentioning earlier? Great, Great Malenko? No, The Runner. Oh, Steve Prefontaine. There you go.

Who are they? Prefontaine of sex? Relax. Nice. It was a Relax. Nice. It was a reach for this. Nice, Mio. Now you just exposed yourself telling everybody that you don't know who Steve Prefontaine

is. I certainly don't and I'm not ashamed of it. Off the Pod Convo. Off the Pod Convo. So I basically already won, but I guess we can continue the rest of the charade. I was with you on the LFO thing, but David Amiel's passion turned me. Not LFO, Len. Oh, Len.

Exactly. If I saw this playlist on Spotify, I would go out of my way to make it do badly. It wouldn't because the rest of the country would be into it. The rest of the world. Anybody with access to the internet. Okay, you know who would be into it? Donald Trump would be into it. How do you feel about that?

How do you feel about that? He loves Len. He's a letter from way back. I mean, I might not agree with all of his opinions, but if the guy likes good music, the guy likes good music. I can't stop him from liking dope shit.

Listen, I didn't vote for him but he stole my president. I've been saying that a lot lately. I got cut the other day. It was red, white, and blue that came out. Go ahead.

No, we're going to let you sit in that. Red, white, and blue is... I'm going to finish the joke. Maybe I should have just trolled this whole fucking thing. I'm not finish that joke. Maybe I should have just trolled this whole fucking thing.

I'm not trolling. You are. Whether you mean to or not, you are the troll. Is it because I have coffee on my shirt? Yeah.

Because I'm a troll. The second you spilled the coffee, I was like, he's done. Is that? No. God damn it. They're watching

the steal my... I didn't say watch the video. That's not helping anything. Those guys suck. I told you. People have definitely committed the video. That's not helping anything. Those guys suck. I told you. People have definitely committed genocide, too.

That's hard. It's a summer jam. Oh, my God. Yeah. A summer jam for Gaddafi. There's probably a kid named after whoever the lead singer of that band is, which is really good. But that...

No. It's literally a whole song. It's just like every Sugar Ray friggin'... Which would have been a better pick, Because at least Sugar Ray was a bop There's a Jet Ski in the video, I'm back on board I'm in again Listen, if you pick Are you really?

They're both my wife beaters I'm just guessing, are you going to pick I'm Yours by Jason Mraz next? You can't say other songs And now I have to cross it off my list I'm yours Okay, I will pick Say other songs. And now I have to cross it off my list. I'm yours. Okay, I will pick. All right, Braydo. Yeah.

What a rough last name. I'm picking, with no shame, Say You'll Be There by the Spice Girls. Great. Which I'm sure no one here remembers. I do. I don't remember. It was their slow jam, right? Giving you everything.

It literally starts with the chatter that makes you feel like you're at a party. Didn't you just fucking talk shit about talking at the beginning of the song? No, no, no. The chatter I love. The audible dialogue of, hey, Mark. That's like Barbie girl shit. I don't want that. I don't want that.

But just the vibe. Okay, I'm into that. Oh, we're at a party. Okay, it's summertime already. And then that weird sound from the 90s that was everyone's go-to synth sample. I was like, I can't do it with my mouth. Just play it here, and everyone can hear it. And then the actual song itself, Girl Power,

it's my whole childhood in one fucking song, and it makes me feel like I want to get the girls. Yeah. They won't call me back, so I will set my room and play Sims, but I'll have the window open, and it'll feel good. Damn, that was a real... Cool Orcas Island breeze. I really...

What you just said, I really... I really... What you just said, I really... I saw a lot. As soon as that song gets done, 9 o'clock. Did the girls not want to kick it?

Oh, God, no. Really? I'm in a room with three, four men right now. That is not a new thing for me. Zach Toscani's in the room.

Hey, one girl. And Marissa's here. Do you want to be friends after this or just let me know? I'm looking to make more female friends. New friends!

First of all, we all have plenty of female friends yeah you guys probably have more than i do yeah no one likes me that's girls i don't know what it is really yeah maybe it's your bad attitude it's probably it's probably that i'm a huge fucking bitch that's probably what it is i don't say the word bitch but i guess some people maybe it's your oven set to roast maybe that's why i'm a real bitch not a big fan of the word bitch, but I guess some people still do. Maybe it's your oven set to roast. Maybe that's why. I'm a real bitch. Not a big fan of the word bitch unless it's about a guy who's being mean. I think I can say it about myself. It's kind of my word.

You can't say it. I would like a Meredith Brooks context. I have my tattoo removed. I'm a bitch. I'm a lover. Is that your next pick? I'm a child. We're not there yet.

That was a winner. That was a winner. That's a bang. That was a win, dude. I will not be ashamed. What a weird, that'd be fun. That was a winner That was a winner That was a winner That's a bang That was a win dude That would be a shame What a weird That'd be fun That's a cold weather

Shoes from Medford, Oregon So Shakespeare Festival No that's Ashlyn Ashlyn Right down the road So there we go So I have nothing

I'll say about that It's a fucking solid pick Say you'll be there By the Spice Girls Fantastic pick What do you Yeah I like that you picked

It's not a deep cut But it's not one of their It's not one of their biggest hits, right? No. Well, actually, I think it is. I think it's up there, yeah. You got to dig around in the crate a little bit for that one. Wannabe's number one. Definitely.

Again, though, it's too famous to be a summer jam for me because it doesn't make me feel like summer. Because that's uncharted all year. Right, right. Exactly. Whereas Say You'll Be There, I'm like, oh, here we go. I want a popsicle. Oh, it's the second biggest song. And you break it. Yeah. Yeah, it does'm like, oh, here we go. I want a popsicle. Oh, it's the second biggest song. And you break it.

This I swear. Yeah. Yeah, it does feel like. Oh, David Zantz and I like it. Give me everything. All the drugs. This I swear. This I swear.

This I swear. He stepped on the top. I want a goddamn slush puppy. Did I wreck it? Did I ruin? Did I wreck everyone's day? Yeah, you bounced on the handlebars a little too hard. I wrecked everyone's day. Thank you. I'm not handlebars a little too hard. I wrecked everyone's day.

Thank you. I'm not all hating. I liked that. I'm having so much fun. Oh, remember Spice Up Your Life by the Spice Girls? We've got to stop naming other songs. Spice Up Your Life! Do I remember it?

These might all be on my list. No, come on. We're not picking another Spice Girls song. No, my list is going to continue to be Thunder. So, not a big deal. Did that song kick off, not say you'll be there, but Spice Up Your Life, did that kick off the Latin craze that hit America shortly thereafter?

You could write a dissertation on that. Are we tracing the roots of the Latin craze right now? I do. Oh my god. You already said Live in La Vida Loca. Her lips are devil raised. Live in La Vida, wait, in the skin, the color of mocha. Get those lyrics in the right order, please. Her lips are devil red and her skin is a color mocha.

Thank you for doing it once. We just did that. Succinct. It wasn't Ricky Martin that was in here, though. It was just me. It was John. Just me. Not Ricky Martin of Manudo thing?

It wasn't Young Ricky, dude. I'm saying young. I'm doing that. It wasn't Young Ricky in here. I like to say young and then people's mannerisms. Like, you're young finger tap right now. Young repeating the song we just talked about. Young the jokes, funnier the second time.

Young redundancy over here. Well, young pit sweat, dude. God, it is so hot here. It is hot. Say You'll Be There by the Spice Girls. Fantastic. David, time to build on your Mazda commercial. I'm actually really excited to see what you do next.

Time to start building. So this song dropped in June 6, 1998. Big summer for your boy, David. Living in Federal Way, Washington at the time. Hell yeah. My mom was working in Olympia. Wanted your boy to get out the house. Didn't want him staying around the apartment complex all summer.

Bunch of bad ruffians about. Put me in Olympia summer day camp, right? So now I'm going to day camp in Olympia. Sounds like we're cellmates and you're telling them. I'm just hanging out. I meet this girl. Her name is Carolyn. Beautiful girl. We're holding hands, right? We're holding hands. It's big. It's big.

We're talking on the phone. We're holding hands. Come to summer day camp one day. She's holding hands with this punk bitch named Forrest. His name was Forrest,rest. I hate you, Forrest. His name was Forrest, dog. That's kind of hot for us. I hated him. What?

Forrest? Heartbroken. I hated him. But the soundtrack to that whole summer song that dropped on June 6, 1998, Ghetto Superstar. Hell yeah. Good. The Maya version, yeah. ODB.

Fraz, Young Maya, ODB. Oh, man. Well, I was going to choose Islands in the Stream, but I guess I can't. No, you can't choose. That song was so... It just feels like summer, man. It totally does. It totally does.

The whole summer was that. I have nothing negative to say about that. No, it slapped. It was a great song. That'll be the best pick of the whole... That's great. That's such a good one. Praz is the luckiest person on Earth, by the way.

Dude! Dude! Oh, my God! Talk about, like, falling off. He brought nothing to the Fugees. No, he didn't. Nope. You were always annoyed.

That's when you go to get a Sprite. Shut the fuck up, Praz. What are you talking about? Shut up! Did you read about how the song was made? This episode of All Fantasy Everything is brought to you by Babbel. If you want to learn a new language, the best way is

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It was like a whole thing that I can't remember well enough to recite now, but Google it later. Oh, interesting. Really? What a good story. Cool.

I'm really good at bringing up things I can't actually finish saying. Theme song to Bullworth. Yeah, Bullworth. Yeah, Bullworth. One of Warren Beatty's last movies. Never watched that movie that summer.

It's not bad. Young Bullworth. Get on. We're clearing it up. Get on. I bought a CD at Claire's Thinking it had that song on it And it turned out it was

I don't know why they did this In the 90s But it turned out it was A song of all the hits But re-recorded by generic people What? So that they didn't have to Pay the royalties

Oh god Claire's Boutique? Like you can buy CDs There's some CDs there And we can act like My voice didn't just crack We can act like it didn't But it didn't

Claire's Boutique? Claire's Boutique? My voice definitely cracked there. We can act like my voice didn't just crack. We can act like it didn't, but it didn't. No, it didn't. My voice definitely cracked. Now let's all move past it like fucking grown-ups. Where you got your one ear pierced and we're going to go for a summer.

That's the one. Recently? Pat Jordan wasn't letting me pierce anything. I'll tell you that. If she had, you would have had that one hoop.

We know, based on your choices, I know that was one hoop. I just had one huge hoop. Yep. Yeah, they sold it, and I got it for Ghetto Superstar and that All Saints song. Never ever gonna be so bad.

And I was so jazzed to hear it. And then the fucking bullshit studio singer was not good. It's like, Ghetto Superstar. And I was like, that's not Maya. Oh, that sucks. I just burned that In the fucking fire I was so pissed dude I'm bummed that Maya

Didn't have a little more Longevity She had some hits though Lady Marmalade Hello Oh she did Yeah yeah I'm just saying

I wish she was like Still around I'm moving on She's great She was foined with an O Dude She was on the cover Of that King magazine

And changed a lot of people's lives Yep Foined Foined Now this is getting weird The game even referenced her I used to have dreams Magazine changed a lot of people's lives. Yep. Fine. Fine. Now this is getting weird. The game even referenced her. I used to have dreams of fucking. Oh, I'm in front of that king.

Have you seen? Yeah, it's. She brought the cakes to play. Second hottest Maya after Angelou. I'm just attracted to. Power. Poetry of the soul. Eloquent.

I'm attracted to power. Yeah, I'd agree with that. Angelou first. Yeah. And then her. Ghetto Superstar. And then the third, the Civilization. Tragedy of power. Yeah, I'd agree with that. Angelou first. Yeah. And then her. Ghetto Superstar. And then the third, the Civilization. And then the Mayans.

Yeah. Yeah. And then. I'm glad we cleared that up. And then fourth is Mario. The first. Maya. Like that.

But he's like referencing something. Oh no, Maya plumbing is full of turtles. Like that. Is it? Okay. I'm only dimly aware of what's happening around here right that. Is it? Okay. I'm only dimly aware of what's happening around me right now.

We're living though. We're living guys. We're living. Got a superstar. Mr. Cartwheel, what do we got? Oh, and it's around to me. Yep.

Two for you. And third pick because it is a serpentine situation. It is a serpentine draft. Please don't let me down. Don't let me down. I have to pick another basic ass song.

Okay. But my third one won't be basic. Fair enough. I'm taking Three Little Birds by Bob Marley. Oh, that's not great.

Great. I don't think that's basic. It's old enough it's not basic now. Is it? Okay, fantastic. I mean, you just put that on? Mm-hmm.

Yeah. Smoke a little marijuana? Oh, sure. That's the one that's like boop, boop, boop, boop. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, that's a jam.

Don't worry, you know, about a thing. Go out on the patio, get yourself one of those left-handed cigarettes. Yeah. You know what I mean? Try smoking a whole one

by yourself. What are you doing? I'm just wailing on this joint out front. Pull him off, get him myself. That is, I'll put that on real loud

and walk outside without a shirt on. Hell yeah. Screaming. Just walk. In the cobra position, you know, hands behind your... Yeah. I was going to say, that is a shirt off song.

That is a shirt off song. Wash the night away, dude. That's a shirt off ass song. That's a song that makes me feel okay with being kind of sweaty. Like if the AC was broken, I'd listen to that and I'd be like, this ain't so bad. Just eat a lot of popsicles. Yeah. Ooh, that's a popsicle jam.

Yeah, it is. Maybe let it melt and fall onto your chest. Maybe it even transcends into like a party where you made punch. Oh. yeah ooh that's a popsicle jam yeah it is maybe let it melt and fall onto your chest maybe even transcends into like a party where you made punch oh shit you know

like it works for both punch jam it's a punch jam yeah it has versatility I like that yeah like the punch with the sorbet in it

yeah oh you wait till it melts a little bit and then you have essentially a milkshake I can't fuck with punch too heavy anymore it's so sugary

okay that's all we did last night. Okay, grandpa. You should just make it punch. No, I know. I had a Zima last night. I did do that. Would not brag about it, my dude.

What the fuck? No, you didn't. Can you get Zima anymore? Somebody brought a six pack of Zima and they're like, who wants a real Zima? And I'm like, dog. What?

And it's been in the fridge since like the 90s? Yeah, I want to know that guy. You can get it again. They brought it back? Like imported from Russia? Where the fuck did you get that? I'm going to get some Zimas after this.

Why? The question is why. Drink a Zima, listen to Zoom Zoom. You can still buy Mark's heart. Put a Jolly Rancher right in the bottom. Come on. Summertime. There it is.

When I was a kid. Is it? Another one of those death looks. I've got like six of them. We would get these flavored waters and I had some gummy worms and I put a gummy worm in the bottom of the flavored water and I was like, kid tequila. That's hysterical. Kid tequila.

How old are you? I don't know. 12, 13? That's when you were like, I'm going to be a comedian someday. Or I'm going to drink a tequila someday. Or I'm going to be a great alcoholic. I'm going to have a drinking problem later. Kid tequila.

This is going to turn into a disease. I'm going to throw my kids a party if I ever have them, and they're going to get tequila margaritas with not tequila, is gonna turn into a disease I'm gonna throw my kids a party if I ever have them and they're gonna get tequila margaritas with not tequila but still the worm yeah

oh yeah listen kids you're gonna have to drink it hey sweetie it looks like you're drinking a martini it's cute for mommy you'll be drinking

your fourth real martini of the day yeah that's the mom I aim to be yeah Bob Marley three little birds it is I mean it's a little

it's a little bit but it's still little bit cliche, but it's so good. It's still good. It's a funky reggae jam. Yep. It's maybe the funkiest reggae jam. It's the funkiest reggae jam. Of the reggae jams that we know, which is probably 10. I know 10.

Probably 10. Jazz and reggae, I know like 10 each. I'm 100 plus, dude. You're 100 plus? Reggae, yeah. Man, I wish. How many reggae artists can you name off the top of your head? Don't do it. It's going to take too long. Bob Marley. A lot. At Fair enough. Reggae, yeah. Man, I wish. How many reggae artists can you name off the top of your head? Don't do it.

It's going to take too long. A lot. At least 10. I can name three. Eekamass. Is he one of them? Fair enough. Yeah, so that's my second pick.

For my third pick, oh, all right. This is a heart pick. I like it. I might get dragged for it. P.O.D. No. Okay. Whoa, P.O.D. I was going to stop P. I like it. I might get dragged for it. P.O.D. No. Okay. Whoa, P.O.D.

I was like, stop P.O.D. I'm taking Damn It by Blink-182. Oh, that's great. Oh, good. Thank God. How does that one go? It's all right to tell me how you feel about me. I won't try to argue or hold it against you.

Oh. Won't try to argue or hold it against you. Oh. What's the one where they say summer in the chorus? It might be. It's the end of feeling this? Yeah, feeling this. God, I'm grit right now.

The air is so cold and yum. I'm feeling this. Wait, wait, wait. What? is so cold and numb. I'm feeling this. Wait, wait, wait. What? It's cold and numb and it's summer? Yeah. Tom and Mark, they really needed to talk to each other about the verses, didn't they? Yeah, those dudes were... Yeah.

For the podcast. You know, peyote and meth. Just different sides of the 50-year-old. There you go. That is, though. That, like, encapsulates all of the, like, pop-punk of our childhood. For real. For me, it's the perfect,

it's the perfect pop punk song. It's so good. Or like some 41 maybe, but it stands much better the test of time. Yeah. Yeah. It's,

it's a little, it's a little bit about a breakup too, which is nice, but it's like real poppy and positive. Weren't all their songs a little bit about a breakup?

They were, or like, they were either like the first couple dates or it's over. That's how I learned the word commiserate. Commiserate? What's my age again? How old were you?

I just heard it on the way here. I didn't know who Blink was until the way here. It was earlier today. Who is this new band? But also I was 16 on the way here. Now I'm 35. Who are these kids? I just fucking love pop punk so much. The older I get, the more I listen to it without any shame. It's fun.

And the more that you admit it, which is tight. The more that you're just throwing it out like, yes, I love pop punk. I totally. I fucking love it. I was blasting the used the other day. Yeah. Just for fun. Not ironically.

I'll listen to Bro-Him by Panty Wise. It's called Bro-Him. I don't understand what you're saying. I don't think it's ironic. The song is called Bro-Him. I don't understand what you're saying. I don't think it's ironic. The song is called Bro-Him. I don't understand any of the words. H-M-Y-N or however that word is spelled. Like if I thought you desperately needed a hand job,

I'd be like, Ian, go bro-ing. Bro-ing. Is that what the song's about? Tammy bro-ed you. Tammy bro-ed you of mini golf. Tammy bro-ed everybody but me so much. She bro-ed all my bros. While she was supposed to be exclusively'd everybody but me. So much. She bro'd all my bros. While she was supposed to be exclusively broing me.

Tammy, dog. She bro'd somebody else. Oh, I hope she listens. She married, she married. She married. Send her this. Send her this. Just drop a link in a Facebook message. See what happens. Tammy, this is my own blood on the cover of this. Damage just feels like driving with the windows down.

Sun's going down yeah you're on maybe you don't even maybe you're not even gonna like drink it's like you're too young for that

but you're like driving somewhere fun maybe you're not driving anywhere you bought a candy bar you gotta eat it before it melts yeah

you have a giant slurpee or a push pop oh Flintstones one I fucked those up one of those Flintstones is that what a push pop is yeah yeah baby cause they were also kinda creamy yeah oh my god they were good they were fruity but creamy yeah you felt healthy I fucked those up. One of those Flintstones. Is that what a push pop is?

Yeah, baby. Because they were also kind of creamy. Yeah. Oh, my God. They were good. They were fruity but creamy. Yeah, you felt healthy. I used to house those things. I would house them.

They'd be clean when I was done with them. Oh, yeah. Six pack, dude. Clean like I'd break it and then lick the side of the plastic. Did you have that weird mustache, though, afterwards? Yeah. No. I wasn't that kid.

You were that kid. You left it on your face until it caked into your skin? No, I'm asking if he did it. He was grounded for a whole summer. I didn't come kid. You were that kid. You left it on your face until it caked into your skin? No, I'm asking if he did it. He was grounded for a whole summer. I didn't come out the house, dog. Nobody saw what I looked like that summer. I didn't look like anything. It was your whole body had that mustache.

I came back to school just tinged orange. It didn't matter. David hit the spray tan hard this summer. No, I was just grounded. I just did three months in the hole, baby. Cheeto dust. Three months in the hole. No, repercussions, that's all. I think that's a great choice.

I got nothing bad to say about that. Thank you very much. I was a little bit afraid. No, hell yeah. As you should be. But I'm glad this is the same space as Papa. It seems like she only hates my goddamn pics. Well, I think that says more about you than me, to be fair.

I think she's going to hate my next pic, to be honest with you. Let's hear it. Listen, this podcast is more fun when someone hates it. Was that your third? that was my third pick oh okay alright so I need to set up the scene first of all

this is the song April of 01 right oh good time early on still an innocent country David Borey before the events

that's what I'm saying this was the last free summer before the events the internet wasn't cracking when you could meet your friends at the airport gate here's what I'm telling you. This summer, eighth grade going into ninth grade, I was the coolest I've probably ever been.

I went to summer school that summer. I'd agree with that. Hooked up with all the cool kids, right? Now I'm smoking weed. I'm hanging out. I'm riding bikes everywhere. I got Mike's Hard Lemonades in my backpack. Hell yeah.

Stereotypical summer, Aurora, Colorado. Me and all my boys. Shout out to Brandon, Malcolm, the whole team. Friends of the podcast. Yeah, friends of the podcast. Not really. We used to hang out next to Meadow Point Elementary. We used to get on the roof sometimes.

Oh, hell yeah. Oh, man. It was just a great, great summer. Soundtrack playing in the back, Ride With Me by Nelly. Yeah. Remember what a good hit that was? You already won this one. What a good summer hit that was?

Oh, my God. You really fucked with that commercial, but these last two picks are off the rails. So strong. Yeah. That is a great choice. Hell yeah. Yeah, it was everywhere that summer, man. Just riding the BMX

bike up to King Soopers to get some quarter sodas. Do you want to go and take a ride with me? And that band-aid. The band-aid. Aggressively into the band-aid. The other guys on the song that nobody knew but were still killed. City Spud. The St. Lunatics, I believe. Murphy Lee. They had to say, there was some reference

to L. Murphy Lee, Courtney B. To weed in it that I had not heard yet. To uh, uh, uh, uh. A J? What did I get? It's like an L in the back of the Benz. I still don't know the fucking L sounds. An L was from, first of all, Biggie's the first one that threw that at me. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

But I was a little too young for Biggie to be like when I would have known what that was. What does L, I mean, I know it's a joint, but like how does it, where's, how does that happen? I think it's a blunt, like an L. None of us know what an L is. Is that like a blunt, like a cigar company maybe? Like an L? I don't know. God, we sound. Is it like a cross joint but it's a blunt, like an L. None of us know what an L is. Is that like a blunt, like a cigar company maybe? Like an L? I don't know. God, we sound...

Is it like a cross-dry with missing half? Like an L like a Lucy, maybe? Oh, maybe. No, I think it's like EL, like the L- What was he smoking? Oh, really? The blunt wraps? We don't know.

We just assumed, but what is an L? I mean, he was... Maybe it's PCP. Nelly was smoking. Him and the St. Lunatics, they were smoking weed. An L is a lid. But how was it L-shaped? Or was it a certain strain of weed that started with L?

Pot roll. Yeah, lid. What's that, like two grams or something? Usually just under an ounce of weed. He smoked a whole ounce of weed by himself? Well, you weren't going to take the ride with him and smoke the ounce. In one car ride, they smoked a whole ounce of weed? We don't know where they were driving to.

Oh, that's true. It could be cross-country. It also says just pot rolled in a cigar wrap. That's called a blunt. What are you talking about? Yeah, I always thought blunt and L's were synonymous. Oh, you know what? I bet they had it blunt, and I bet blunt wasn't okay for censorship, so they were like, what about an L?

Oh, like when they got skeet, skeet, skeet on the radio? Smoke a blunt in the back. It doesn't sound as good though. Only because we know the original. That's an amazing pick. Yeah, it was that. An L is a marijuana joint created with two papers that before rolled has an L shape. Oh, so it's like.

Oh, so you like. So you make like an end on it? Like a filter? Is it like when you roll like a Dutch Masters and you put it has the two papers? I love it. Like four people who probably smoked a fair amount of weed don't know what this is. We don't know. I stay smoking weed.

It's like one of my favorite things. I wouldn't say it's my favorite thing as much as it's just a lifestyle. Oh, I'd say it's my favorite. So much so that I try not to talk about stoner culture. Because then people will know that I'm just smoking weed all the time. I know what you mean. I've never had like marijuana socks or anything.

I love weed but hate weed culture so much. Oh, I hate it. Do people that smoke weed wear those legitimately? Yeah, some of them. Not adult. Some do though.

Yeah, some do. But those are the people who are just thirsting for a personality so hard. Yeah, I have so much personality. I'm a weed smoker. I'm like mad cool and I smoke hella weed.

True story. I don't even be like the weed guy. I do want to be known as Weed Man, personally. As Weed Man from Jacket. From Jacket.

From Jacket, yeah. Yep, that's me. That's my new brand. Hi, I'm Weed Man. Please introduce me from now on out. What if I just chose Amber 311 right now?

Ooh. I'm not gonna do it. I'm not gonna do it. So with your third pick? Absolutely fucking not. Just don't pick Stacey's mom because Sean's kind of queued up. I almost don't want to do it because it's one of those jokes that there's a comedian who hasn't really done anything else.

So it's just like one. But I want to repeat their joke, but I can't attribute it. So maybe I shouldn't. What? Investigate 311? That's our conger, right? No, no, no. No, the beginning of Amber by 311. Oh, That, no. That's Sarkandre, right? No, no, no. No, The Beginning of Amber

by 311. Oh, yeah, yeah. There's a stand-up comedian who I'm sorry if... Oh, who is that? They might even be a success. Whoever you are, if you hear this,

I'm not ripping you off. I'm just repeating your funny joke but I don't know who you are. If you say Buka de Beppo to the beginning... Buka de Beppo. Buka de Beppo. Buka de Beppo. Wait, what are we saying it to? To the beginning of Amber. To the beginning of Amber by 311. Buka to Peppo Puka to Peppo Puka to Peppo

wait what do we say to the beginning of Amber of Amber 311 Puka to Peppo Puka to Peppo Puka to Peppo

because it starts off like da da da da da da da da da how many times can we sing it whoa Amber is the color of your energy

I might pick that please do not it's time for your third pick ride with me I don't know if we gave enough credit it's such a good

fucking song and also just everyone, I feel like everyone was like, yeah, oh yeah, that was my summer too. Deeply relatable. It was just, yeah. What happened to Nelly?

No staying power. He made so much money. No, he made a new song, a dream song. Reality show too. Someone made you this a dream. No. It was like three years ago.

No. Remember that song you had with Tim McGraw? Yeah, he did. Cause it's all in my head. We don't hear. Let's song with Tim McGraw over and over again he also made that song with Kelly Rowland young Kelly that was my eighth grade summer jam oh yeah me and Jason that's the video where it was beautiful that song is like summer love relatable as kid, that's what you wanted.

I just wanted to hug a girl to that song. And it was still, for me anyway, it was still like pre-cell phones when that song came out. So I was like, you just had to think about them. Yeah. You had to listen to the summer jam and think about the, oh, I know. I understand completely what you're saying. In that video, she gets like a text or a page from him. On Microsoft Excel.

But it's on, yeah, yeah. It's Excel. It's an Excel spreadsheet. And she's like, anyway. Sorry, I made a step on your punchline. I just got excited. It's alright, Brayna. It's time for your third pick. Ew. Me. Okay. Going back to the 80s now, baby. Everywhere Fleetwood Mac.

I don't even know that song. I don't know that one. I don't either. What? Her both of your monocles just fell out. It starts off just a sparkly little jam. It's like, and you're like, ooh, am I being transported to a magic land? What's happening?

And then the bass and the drum kicks in. Can you hear me calling out your name? Oh, yeah. That song is a fucking cut. I want to be with you everywhere. You've heard it. That song is so good. It's amazing.

And then it comes on and you go, I'm being transported to a summer place. It is. It is. You're like, you just got let into like a club with a pool. Yes. You didn't even know it was around the block. And they gave you a big old sun hat. Yeah.

It's the best. It's one of the most like underwritten, wait, that's not the word. I'm like, underrated Flayton Mac jams, even though it's really popular. It's like, oh, dreams. It is good. I was at a bar, at the hotel bar in London. We were going out, but we were like meeting up at the hotel bar first. And that song came on and I was like, it's going to be a good night.

Yes. It was a good night, but it's that kind of song. That's the night he found the treasure yeah that is I forgot that you found treasure I found the treasure

and the pleasure and the leisure the leisure was earlier in the day well the leisure you know the leisure finds you sometimes the leisure finds you

yeah yeah well you find yourself in a state of leisure her name was leisure Leisure thank you thank you so much yeah she was from Colorado

but she was there yeah I gotta tell Sava It's a fucking great jam It's a really good song It's a great ass jam If I was to make this a playlist I think I would have a A kick ass kick back

It does That song really does transport you It is a whole vibe switch And no matter where you are Or what you're doing Or what drugs you're on You're like I feel good now Yeah

I stand by it Maybe not all drugs I don't do drugs It was a hard night You know As soon as I get married Or what drugs you're on. You're like, I feel good now. Yeah. I stand by it. Maybe not all drugs. I don't do drugs. It was a hard night. You know, as soon as I get married. Well, you make signals there. Sex is a drug.

Sex is a drug. Yeah, yeah. No, I don't. I'm not a big sinner, so. Okay, so just go ahead and choose. What was the name of your book from earlier? We'll have to listen to this podcast again. What was it? Whispers from Your Lover.

Whispers from Your Lover Whispers from your lover. Just go ahead and choose Send Me On My Way by Rusted Root now, as I'm sure that's your next pick. You couldn't call my next pick if you had 100 guesses, I guarantee it. I'm super excited now. Those two are good.

They'd probably take them 10. I'm calling Rodeo Garth Brooks. Do you think I don't know every fucking word to the song? You think I would have said that if I wasn't out here? It's Sheryl Crow, Soak Up the Sun. It is not.

That'd be a fun podcast. Guess my next pick. Am I up? It's gonna be Mac Miller and Anderson Paak, Dang. That's last summer's jam. That was my... You never heard that song?

What? Anderson Paak? He came out of nowhere too. You're fair. You never heard that song? I don't know it. What? Anderson.Paak, he came out of nowhere, too. He is tight. You're just like, who is this guy? I've seen that name so many times that I don't know him. So what happened? It's great. Last summer, I moved here in March, but I was on the road for a few months. So last summer, when I finally got settled in LA, Ian was like, hey, you got to hear

this song. And five days a week, we would just sit with the door open, listening to that song as loud as it would go. How does it go? Maybe drink a 40. It just reminds me. I can't keep on losing you. Over complications.

Gone too soon. Wait. We was just hanging. I can't seem to hold on to you. And then Mac Miller raps. I don't know. Ariana Grande's boy. I know her.

Are they together? I would like it if you chose her. But I mean, I guess this is okay too. Ain't gonna happen. Can't get Major League Dick from a Minor's boy. I know her. Are they together? I would like it if you chose her. But I mean, I guess this is okay too. Ain't going to happen. Can't get major league dick from a minor league dude. I just eat pussy.

Other people need food. Other people need food. That's a line from it. In that song? Yeah. I like that. Yeah. I'm going to give this a listen.

Give it a spin. Give it a spin on the old record player. That song will forever remind me of moving to Los Angeles, which like, you know, that'll hopefully shape the rest of my life, is moving here.

We'll see. Keep on losing you. It's a good thing the window's open. I'm going to jump out. It's so breezy. That sounds like a good pick, honestly. It kind of reminds me of that Fleetwood Mac song a little bit. It's like a similar vibe.

Maybe we're not so different, you and I. That is one that you will enjoy if you listen to it. It is. It's got a casual drive to it. I understand you have certain feelings about Len and Will Smith

that we definitely... L-A-D-E-R that week. What a whack lyric. I'm sorry. We're not doing it. You wrote that down. One L dash A dash E dash. That song only had a first draft.

Or maybe he just wrote later and then in parentheses, but spell it. But spell it. Later, spell it. L-A-E-D. He probably... L-A-T-E-R that week. Dang sounds good, though. It is.

But dang is so good. And the video, too. The video is bright colors. It's just a fun... It's got summer written all over it. It's an upbeat... I appreciate for for now and I wait for your next pick to see how that changes are we ready for it I don't know ready for pick and report

he's dressed so cool Anderson.Paak is dressed so cool he's like a cool that I don't know he has this like pink windbreaker that says like I'm sad today but tomorrow I'll be happy is that what it says on it David you're watching the video he's also got that nose ring, the San Francisco nose ring. And he's wearing

navy blue skimpy shorts. And he's in love with this thick lady. I think that's his actual lady. I think some would call her All-Star Thickum. What's your next picture? An All-Star Thickum. I wrote for the Grammy Awards this year. Oh, hey.

Very accomplished. Congrats for your butt. That does sound like your name. And that's it. That sounds... You know, I wrote for the Grammys. Anyway, next pic. And we met Anderson.Paak.

He's so cool. Of course he is. He's such a nice guy. So would I. You should have him on. Fuck. I didn't mean him like that uh but like he was doing a performance with a tribe called quest and like you could tell how stoked he was he was like who wouldn't man i'm like god i know tribe yeah tribe ruined for me by a boy named data the last name schreiber whose aim username

was a shribe called quest what is it leo driver dare he figured out but it wasn't that a shribe called quest. What? Is it Liam Shriver? How dare he? He had something figured out, but it wasn't that. A shribe called quest. Rich Homie Carpets likes that. No. Pick four in the serpentine draft. Pick four.

I hate that Mac Miller raps like he's always about to fall down. He does. He's always moving forward. The way he moves is like he's about to lose it. Maybe he has vertigo. Maybe he's a bitch.

Sorry, I don't know where that came from. I've been up for a while. Pick number four. In this Serpentine draft is gonna be Picture Me Rollin' by Tupac. What'd you roll your eyes for? I got nothing bad to say about that. Picture her rolling.

I'm glad you didn't choose California. I mean, I'm glad you didn't choose California. your eyes for it I got nothing bad to say about that picture her rolling I know picture those eyes rolling back in your fucking head I mean I'm glad you didn't choose like California but you know still I mean

I will this is crazy that you don't think that's a summer jam it definitely is yeah that's completely it is a summer jam

are we saying pedestrian that's a song that whenever it comes up on my phone iPod that I still listen to rarely or in the whip it never gets skipped I'm like it's like song that whenever it comes up on my phone, iPod that I still listen to rarely or in the whip,

it never gets skipped. I'm like, it's like a Forrest Gump song. I'm watching the whole thing. I thought you said a Forrest Gump song and I was like, are you trying to tell me

the whole soundtrack of Forrest Gump in your car and you play it on rotation? I can't let myself skip it. I drive a lot. I wouldn't mind that. I wouldn't mind that.

Take the Miracle Whip all over Los Angeles listening to Forrest Gump. Is that Forrest Gump? I think so. You're the only one that would know that. No, I don't understand what you're doing. Tupac, Picture Me Rolling.

Picture Me Rolling is perfect. My favorite Tupac song of all time. That's the one that goes, Picture Me Rolling. At the end, yeah? Yeah, yeah, yeah. I know that one. Picture Me Rolling. I know a lot of rap.

Yeah, it's that song. It's great. It's just like, it's perfect. It feels like July, not the beginning of summer, but not the It's just like, it's perfect. It feels like July. Not the beginning of summer, but not the end. It does feel like the middle. It feels like the middle. And it's like you drive.

Picture me rolling. You're just out doing some summer shit. If that one goes, picture me rolling. Well, I mean, that's the remix. I'm trying to remember how it goes. Picture me rolling. I like that that's how you. It's an Italian chef's dance.

A California love. I can't laugh anymore. I'm a P. A talk of passion. How does it actually anymore. I'm going to pee. How does it actually go? Picture me rolling. No, it's still the same in my head. Why? Picture me rolling.

Do you know who Tupac is? Yes, but I'm getting all of his songs mixed up. And now in my head it's, it was all a dream. But I know that's Biggie. That is a... I know that's Biggie. I'm sorry, but I'm getting them mixed up. It was all a dream.

That's what you said but you're all into that thing whoa in your head Tupac and Biggie are Mario and Luigi listen

I am I am 28 years old what is that an excuse for it's Biggie I was like I was like 4 when these songs were popular I used to read

the word about magazines I mean I wasn't even I wasn't born when the Beatles came out but I know the Beatles salt and pepper on my book of teens't even, I wasn't born when the Beatles came out, but I know the Beatles. Salt and pepper on my pookateen. But for me, I was just enough on the cusp of it

that I overheard it at a young age and then had no interest in it. I don't think the song's called, Oh, Darling. You know. I mean, maybe it is. I wasn't alive then. Man, you guys are gonna fight.

I've got keys coming from overseas. How does it actually go? That was part of it. Picture me rolling. What's like of it. Picture me rolling. What's the melody? Picture me rolling. I don't know. Oh, you made fun of me, but I was guessing it.

But you made fun of me. There's not much of a chorus, per se. There kind of isn't much of a chorus. It's just the music, and he says, picture me rolling. I was rolling. It's a tricky one to start start doing because there's a lot of N words in there and I don't want

to accidentally. Fair enough. So it's been You should just say you could say friendo instead. No, I can't look at David for 20 minutes.

Those are the rules. Those are the rules. I got to look at the ground for 20 minutes. It's got one of my favorite parts. Like,

there's got to be a word for this. A thing that I don't think is good, but I like a lot. Like, it's weird. I like it because it's weird. Yeah, welcome to rap music. Yeah, yeah. Like a cool line about killing somebody?

Yeah. No, but it's that CPO where he's like, move, smooth. A cool line about killing somebody. That guy who, like, raps, he's like, he could net, that CPO guy, his-

I got to get the fuck up in and formulate a caper. I'm as smooth as a motherfucker. Yeah, yeah, me and my mom. I'm cool as a motherfucker. I'm a good mom. See,

I never attached to lyrics. I only know music. If I don't know the music, I don't think I can remember the song. It's all right. You'll, everyone listening knows it. Yeah.

Yeah, right, they do. Congrats. Everybody on Team Sean Jordan. But isn't that, he's like this weird, that guy, that dude who just drops in the middle of a song. And also, I never heard. And raps like Bugsy Malone. Never heard a single other thing from that dude. That guy woke up, he was like, I know what my angle in rap is.

I'm going to be like a 1930s gangster. Hey, Tupac, you're recording a song. You mind if I hop on board? Him and that, what's that fucking, Jadania. Dude, I feel like they hang out. Oh, Jadana? Yeah. Jadana's weird.

I hate that guy for no reason. I do too. You do too? Yeah. Thank God. I don't know why. I just watch him. I'm like, I fucking hate you, man.

I like him. I think he's sneaky hard, dude. I don't know what that means. Sneaky hard? So he's sneaky? He fulfills your redhead black dude theory. In the head of your bell buckle? Oh, yeah. Yeah he's your He fulfills your Redhead black dude theory Oh yeah For sure he fulfills

Oh no that dude's A redhead black dude From way back All of his actions All of his actions Even the whole suit thing Yeah It's weird to me

His whole Classic man I don't like when You know like If you're gonna dress fashionable Dress modern fashion What's this weird 1940s fashion shit

Also it's hot Yeah And you hot press your hair You grown man Get the fuck out of here Dress fashionable. Dress modern fashion. What's this weird 1940s fashion shit? Also, it's hot. Yeah. And you hot press your hair, you grown man. Get the fuck out of here, bro. He's wearing a vest and shit? Don't wear a vest. I'll tell you who else wore a vest. Tupac.

Carl Canai vest. That's not. Don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't. Don't besmirch the car. Days after his birthday. Big old brown Carl Canai vest. Days after his birthday. Are you seriously shitting on the Canai vest? No, no, no. I'm just kidding. Dude, my first skate old brown Carl Kanai vest. Days after his birthday. Are you seriously shitting on the Kanai vest?

No, no, no. I'm just kidding. Dude, my first skate shoes were Carl Kanai's. You made shoes? Yeah. Skate shoes? Jordan bought them for me. No, they were not skate shoes.

Turns out they weren't made for skateboarding. But your boy went ahead and threw Kosh right into the wind. Kosh. Kosh. It's like the second half of that word. Is that short for caution? I never, is that what? I've never heard throw Kosh to the wind. Kosh. Kosh. It's like the second half of that word. Is that short for caution? I never, is that what? I've never heard throw kosh to the wind.

I've never heard anybody say that. You've never heard that phrase? It's caution to the wind. Kosh. You throw kosh into the wind. No, you throw caution to the wind. Yo! We!

Yo! Yo! No, no, no, no, no. No, no, no, no, no. Now I need an exact, I need an exact, I need an exact- Aha! I need an exact- No!

I need an exact number of downloads. There's so many layers to this. What are you doing? Aha! No way! I'm not gonna make fun of you anymore. That was the best shit ever! I feel too bad now.

Into the wind? Listen, I used to think- You were 35 years old so you just had a realization that was like wait is that caution I thought you were being facetious and that you were abbreviating the word caution

I thought that I just figured out that this phrase that isn't real caution into the wind I thought caution was short for caution into the wind. I thought cosh was short for caution. Caution into the wind. So what did you think cosh was? Short for caution.

You just saw me on the revelation. Why would you throw it into the wind? You thought the saying was the saying, but you were just shortening caution. He thought it was a different scene. He thought it was caution into the wind. Here's another one. I was texting my friend.

I'm sure we might all know David Huntsberger. I was texting him. Huntsberger. And I said, for all intensive purposes. And he goes, did you mean to say intensive purposes? I'm like, yeah, dude, of course. I had no idea that that was the actual phrase until I texted it to him. That's not as crazy to me as this caution.

I was trying to take the heat off. It didn't work. No, it's not going to happen, dude. Not a common mistake. This is crazy to me as this caution. I was trying to take the heat off. It didn't work. No, it's not going to happen, dude. It's not a common mistake. This is crazy to me. Caution. And no one's ever called you out. Why don't say it?

I mean, it's one of those things where. You even were like, I'm going to boldly say this on a podcast, even though I'm not totally sure if I know this phrase correctly. Yeah. Oh, my goodness. Wow. Confidence. Oh, my goodness. Confidence over here. That's crazy. That was crazy. I. Oh my goodness. Wow. Confidence. Oh my goodness. Confidence over here.

That's crazy. That was crazy. I can't believe that. We should just end this now. I'm fucked up right now. I don't give a fuck about summer times anymore. We really should.

That was a peak for me. So funny. So many things. I feel like I'm going for a second orgasm now. Don't get greedy. We got it. We're good.

I'm going to have to crip walk down to Skid Row and fight someone after this just so I feel better about it. Dude, the deed is done. The deed is done. Fuck you, Taylor Smith. I still don't get that joke.

You called her Taylor Smith? Her name's Taylor Swift. That's funnier, though. I don't understand what you're saying. It's arguably the most famous person in the world. You called her Taylor Smith. I don't want to follow that.

What kind of fucking turn is it? It's me. I'm stern. Fuck this. Wait, is that short for caution? Wow. Caution, really? Fuck. That's one of the top moments on this podcast.

That's one of the top moments of my life. Of my life, yeah. Of my life. Absolutely. Marissa and Zach are the only two people that haven't actually been verbally mean to me about this yet so I'm just hoping Marissa do you want to get in on this?

yeah you guys want to hit the mic Zach do you want to roast? you want to jump on the mic and make fun of Sean real quick? I don't think there's anything we can say that's meaner to what he did to himself it's not mean it's just crazy I loved it it's adorable

all this is going in the suicide note, by the way. You guys are going to be bummed. You guys are going to be bummed. Don't make me feel bad for having a good time. I love it. I think it's great. For one, it's worth it. It's very endearing.

Our relationship stays fresh. I just keep on all these things I love about you. I like to imagine that that's what 12-year-old Ian said when he put his gummy worm in his drink and said, now it's Ketikula. If anything, I threw caution to the wind and made a kiss. And then 35-year-old Sean just said it for thousands of people that are going to hear it. But now I like that you've just been getting away with saying it wrong for years. That's dope.

It's the perfect crime. Yeah. Fuck, man. You never start saying it. Because if you say it fast enough, no one would ever know you're saying two separate words. It sounds cautious. I think I'm going to start doing that and see if anyone notices

that I'm doing it. They never will. They'll never will. Cosh into the wind. I'm going to throw cosh into the wind. You'd really have to space out and throw cosh into the wind. The more that you guys are saying it,

I'm like, what a fucking idiot I have been my whole life. But if you hadn't have broken down, I would have never, you could have said it to me 20 more times. Never would have called it out.

And I like that I thought that I was going to fucking split the atom to you guys. Wait, is Kosh short for Kosh? You guys will excuse me. I honestly didn't understand what was happening until you were done. I was like, what's he doing right now? I'm just going to see where this goes. Are we on the fifth pick? It seems crazy that we're still drafting. Okay,

Miel, is that for your fourth pick? It is? Yeah. Okay. Okay. God, I don't know how to follow that, dude. Just throw Kosh into the wind and make your fourth pick I'm light headed I feel I feel fucking high man

um that's gotta be the only word like that where like it actually works it feels like in a brief yeah

I feel high cause I'm all high too that's a good point alright I'm choosing got to give it up by Marvin Gaye oh hell yeah

the first Bridgetown I ever did first comedy festival I ever did. That was my song where I'd walk around the block during a show and I'd be like, be present. Yeah. Like, enjoy this while it's happening. And that was the song that I listened to. You can't not, dude.

It's such a good song. Again, it's the party scene background really sets the tone. It is the party scene background. Yeah. Oh, the beginning of... We're people are having some drinks in the background. It's the first song in Menace when Kane's a little kid and Sam Jackson's having that party.

I prefer blurred lines, but it's also good. It's also good. Hey, don't know what to say. Tell you who threw Kosh into the wind, huh? It's a Robin Thicke. It's a cool take on a Robin Thicke classic. I'll give you that. My favorite part of it

is that it's what has set up Robin Thicke and Pharrell. To say, you're the hottest bitch in this place. Yeah, you're the hottest bitch in this place. Yeah. You're the hottest bitch in this place. I'd say that to myself every time I walk into a room. I never figured that out. What rhymes with hug me? He doesn't tell us. What rhymes with hug me? Ask the question. It's not

fuck me. That doesn't rhyme at all. Pug me? Give me a pug. Tug me. Oh, tug me. Handjob, dude. He wants an Indian rug bird. Oh, it's an Indian rug bird. She's gonna give you the bro? He tug me. Hand job, dude. He wanted an Indian rug bird. Oh, that's an Indian rug bird. She's going to give you the bro? He wanted a T-bone, dude. Let me get a tug job under the card table. Tammany Hall. Was Tammy in that video?

Was she one of the girls? Stop. But ho's going to be ho, so I couldn't blame Tammy. Oh, my goodness. I don't think you can argue that pick. It's just good. Oh, it's a great pick. It just feels like summer.

You have a pool party, you drop that jam in, everyone's like, oh. People are feeling it. Does anyone have a cooler? That's a cooler jam. That is a good-ass pick. How many parties have you really been to? Does anyone have a cooler?

I don't think you've ever been to a party, man. There's a lot of with the window open waiting for the girls to come. Hey, would anyone care for a rousing water balloon fight? Like you Google imaged party and you're just describing the first thing that came up.

Are you cool to water? Disco ball. Does anyone have a disco ball with Shutterstock imprinted over it? Yep. Ian goes, hey, you want to do summer jams? And I say, sure. And I spend 12 hours researching summer parties and the music that plays at them. I'll be needing a beach towel for this party.

But you know what? Despite that, very, very, very much of a truth. At least I never said kosh into the wind. I will say that. That was crazy. Still to this day. Having a bucket of full water balloons never said kosh into the wind. I will say that. That was crazy. Having a bucket of full water balloons waiting for your friends to come over? Yeah, sure. I'll take that.

I knew kosh into the wind. I don't know if you should. Both of these are bummers to me, guys. I wish I could just take you guys around for summer with me. I want to watch that Mazda commercial in your room for a whole summer. That wasn't the...

Zoom, zoom, zoom. Okay, what's your summer pick? What's a real summer look like? Got to give it up. Fantastic song. It's a great middle of the party song where you're like if that comes on... Don't leave yet. If you're like, I'm thinking about taking off and then Got to Give It Up comes on, you're like, this is my home.

It's like a now we're partying. Now we're partying, yeah. Does anyone have cocaine? I suddenly feel inspired to do some. Somebody say cocaine? Never done it. David, next question. I've been to church.

I've been to church a lot. Not till marriage, right? Synagogue. Yeah, yeah, not till I'm married. Then I start doing hard drugs. Do you ever call it the gog? No? Okay, no, I understand.

Young synagogue? We will now. Yeah, you know, maybe in the 90s you played pogs at the Gog. Pog Gog. We're trying to stay away from Og because of the Zog, which is a secret Jewish government people think exists. The Zionist occupied government. I really can't take you seriously with sunglasses on like that.

This is a note for the listeners. His sunglasses, he was wearing like, I don't know how to describe this, an asshole. And sort of a real cool. You look like you're supposed to be in summer school right now. Sort of a cool. You look like you're about to say, summer school right now. Sort of a cool. You look like you're about to say, Dave, bow, bow. Yeah.

Also, great pick. Did anyone choose that? We'll see. The drummer in that thing you do. Yeah. I quit. I quit. David, what's your pick?

Your fourth pick. My pick, and this could be said is pedestrian. Also, comes from one of the best summers of my entire, if not the quintessential summer of my 20s. I'm going with swimming pools. Drink. That's the summertime one? July 31st, 2012 is when it dropped. Cruel Summer?

Kendrick. No, the Kendrick song. Oh. Drink. That's like a serious, you're thinking about stuff. Why you babysitting? You know what? I mean, that's a great song.

I loved it. It's about alcoholism, which is like... Yeah, but it's one of those things where you don't notice. You don't notice. There's like hip-hop songs where I'll listen to the words and be like, yeah. But that one, I'm like, nah. I'm only getting this on a very surface level. Throw it up loud.

I was, man, I was, that was like the last summer that Mouth House was still cracking in Denver. That was that summer. What is Mouth House? What house? Oh, Mouth House was this. He has a lisp. Yeah.

Mouth House. Mouth House. R.I.P. Shout out. Everybody from the 646. A bunch of kids from my high school created this crazy punk collective house in the hood in Denver. It was like this giant mansion that was all decrepit on the corner of 28th. Yeah, it was kind of like, it looked like a bando.

They had to fix it up when they rented it. 28th in California, there were hella dogs. They'd have parties with like 600 people plus alligators in the tubs what like it was fucking no i swear the fuck did you get an alligator i man you know we were wild uh you know look it up mouth house though and that was like well these the parties i was missing there were alligators in the tub i saw i saw dikaiju do a set that they did they played they played there one time and and everybody lifted them up. So the guitarist was on somebody's neck, and then the bassist was standing on top of somebody.

Did people die? This sounds like they died. No, nobody ever died, but it was a great summer. That sounds awesome. I was at Mouth House that summer. San Francisco was cracking off. I was touring that summer. I was with this really pretty lady.

I had a lot of good shirts that summer. A lot of good shirts. A lot of good shirts that summer. That was the first really pretty lady. I had a lot of good shirts that summer. A lot of good shirts that summer. That was the first, like, Sylvan House was really good. It was just, like, one of the best summers of my whole life. That drink for free. And that Kendrick album, dude.

It was just in the background all the time. All the time. So many parties I went to that summer. That album hit, like, four times. I mean, all the same. It was so good. It was so good. Yeah, Backseat Freestyle.

You had a joke about Backseat Freestyle. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It was so good. It was so good. Yeah, Backseat Freestyle. You had a joke about Backseat Freestyle. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like that summer, that album was just a great time. It infiltrated stand-up. Yeah, it was so good. It was so much fun. Yeah. And that, I'll tell you, I'll take shots when he says drink.

I know you're not supposed to because I know it's about alcoholism, but I fucking love it. Well, and also, wouldn't you have taken like 45 shots when you know that song? That's not within, that's not within. Come on. Living life, you know? I mean, maybe you're still in the realm of possibility. We're drinking vodka. That doesn't even count.

I smell like 45 shots right now. Yeah. I can feel it. 45 shots. That's when he was still singing like, or I guess singing is kind of a weird word, but that's when he was still like using his weird like nasally voice that I feel like he doesn't use as much anymore. No, he doesn't.

It was like, I like, I don't know, because I didn't like Pimple Butterfly. It's coming. What? I didn't either. What? Not better than Matt City. Not even close. No way. No, it's his worst album. Oh my gosh. You guys don't understand his evolution. Oh, I understand it. I completely understand it.

I get it. You're not on board? That's why Dam is better than Pimple Butterfly. Dam is way better than Pimple Butterfly. Sometimes you gotta you gotta go real far away to come back home I almost chose King Kunta for this

that's no wow and now I know there would have been haters on that King Kunta is like it's like homework yeah

I think the whole album is it's like what's the yams shut up oh my god if you guys aren't okay I don't know

it's like that album that your dad's really into. Hey, he has this Pimple Butterfly. It's really smart. This Kendrick guy's really smart. You know I like him. He's eloquent. What is wrong? Okay, do you like Steely Dan?

Yeah. So what's wrong with dad music? Who the fuck doesn't like Steely Dan? What's wrong with dad music? Nothing's wrong with dad music. Something's wrong with Pimple Butterfly. So why don't you like Pimple Butterfly? Because I don't think it's cool.

Oh, my God. I think it's kind of pretentious. Uncle Mark gave me his Eminem CD back in the day. Cool. That's a shout out, Uncle Mark. Uncle Mark. Swimming pools.

Fantastic pick, Dave. Swimming pools. I love it. Great summer song. Hell yeah. It's time for my fourth. It makes me feel weird. And then fifth pick.

With my fourth pick, I'm going to go way back with you. Back to the day. I'm taking, we listened to it yesterday, Going Up Country by Canned Heat. What is that? I don't know, so many of these songs. What is that?

I don't even know how to sing it. I'm going to be real embarrassed singing it, but I'm going to do it anyway. Come on. Going up the country, gotta go to work. Oh, that's also from a Mazda commercial. You did great. Going up the country, gotta go to work. It is, isn't it?

It is from fucking Gargoyle. Oh, yeah. Maybe now Zoom, It is, isn't it? It is from a fucking car commercial. Oh, yeah. Maybe now Zoom, Zoom, Zoom isn't that crazy. Why do you know the entire repertoire of Mazda commercials? That's tough.

I have a hard time communicating my feelings outside of car jingles. Yeah. So, you know, it's all we do. I know every Mazda commercial ever made

an accompanying jingle. I've never even ridden in a Mazda, but I like their style. Wow, okay. I had a Mazda once. I crashed it. It was my first car in LA. but I like their style. Wow, okay. I had a Mazda once. I crashed it. It was my first car in LA.

And I wrecked it. And I kept driving it for like four or five days afterwards, and I really shouldn't have. I've been there. I left it in a parking garage for three weeks, and Universal, almost like, they were like, we're going to tow it. If you can just leave your car. I left my car in a Papa Murphy's parking lot once. You can just leave it. They'll take it sooner or a Popper Murphy's parking lot once. You can just leave it.

They'll take it sooner or later. Yeah, take it. Fine. Keep it. A lot of Miracle Whips coming up. Yeah, fuck it. Miracle Whips on borrowed time right now, so eventually that'll be happening. The Buick.

Going upcountry, it's just fantastic. It makes me want to drive literally around the country. I went to Matt Bronger. Shout out to Matt Bronger, friend of the pod. Friend of the pod. Host of the party from last night where we all wrecked ourselves. Wild. Yuck.

Young yuck. He had his birthday party up in wine country. God, that's tight. Wine country. He rented a house. It was so fantastic. And leaving, it was like beautiful. It was like a beautiful late summer day.

And I was driving through these fields. And that song came on the playlist. And I was just like these fields and that song came on the playlist and I was just like this is bliss it was like nothing but like vineyards and like and tree covered hills and that song came on and I was like I just want to I just want to be on a road trip forever I get it yeah just forever through like someplace you've never been right you're gonna drive through like the Black Hills on that yes yes South Dakota I mean I never want to go to the Black Hills but like you Yes. Oh, South Dakota you're talking about. I mean, I never want to go to the Black Hills, but like. You guys, funny you should

bring up South Dakota. I was born there. What are you talking about? I'm from there. From South Dakota, my friend. I was born in Sioux Falls, baby. I'm not rushing for it. I was born in Sioux Falls.

You barely adapted to it. You think the darkness that we're talking about, you think the darkness is your ally. I went to high school with the darkness. Played bass for the darkness.

Candied, by the way, would have been an excellent pick for our last podcast. Band names. Candied is a dope band name. But yeah, it's just a road trip song. And I love road trips.

Who doesn't, man? Ian loves road trips. Every year. All year. Hmm. Especially in the summer. A road trip? Yes.

Oh, yeah. Hell yeah. Not in the winter. Okay. A road trip in the summer a road trip yes oh yeah hell yeah not in the winter okay a road trip in the winter when like that driving rain where you're like leaning forward and it's raining

I'm saying autumn this is terrifying why are there so many semi trucks out I'm saying fall is the opportune road trip season maybe

I never even thought about it summer is summer is road trip season that's yeah that's when it's like barbecue season okay if you want to

like break your AC I guess oh no AC on a road trip yeah you're in a bad car it's is road trip season. Yeah, it's like barbecue season. Okay, if you want to break your AC, I guess. Oh, no AC on a road trip. Yeah, you're in a bad car. It's a road trip. This is clearly spoken by three people with short hair because this shit and long hair, I would have dreadlocks by the time I got to my destination. It's not happening.

You don't want that beautiful mane blowing in the wind? That's not what happens. That's fun in theory, but similar to me Google image searching parties, that is not the reality. There are no crocodiles in the tub. I don't like it

when you talk about Google image searching parties. It makes me sad. Yeah, you can come party with us. Yeah, I've been to a bunch of cool parties. I don't want you

to have to do that. You guys, I watched three episodes of Better Call Saul last night. It was fine. What are you talking about? Better Call David and Ian and Sean. Yeah.

And come party with us. That's what you should be watching. Go to Outback. We'll have ourselves a night. Oh, we had a night at Outback. I have often read about Blooming Onions. Oh, we had a night at Outback. The Outback night is when we did Molly at a house party.

Jesus Christ. I got a scratch on my eyeball that night somehow. Oh, my God. Like my dog. He was red-eyed. He was red-eyed. Real buck. We're not doing a good job selling it.

This sounds terrible. We don't want to hang out. We're not doing a good job selling it. This sounds terrible. We don't want to hang out. We just do Molly and fight each other. Oh my God. I got the only thing on the menu at Outback that wasn't a steak. You fucking nerd. It's not like a hamburger. You're not a hamburger.

You're a Salisbury steak. Did you say a hamburger that you cut? That's basically what it was. That makes me sad. We were drinking martinis, though. We were like at Outback, like, let's have another round. People don't do that at Outback.

We got like six rounds at Outback. We were turning up at Outback. Was the waitress like, are you guys okay? Do you need a ride? They loved it. We were the kings.

Oh, yeah. They were very popular. It was like that song The Boys Are Back in Time. It was like that. It was a fire hose of charisma. Like it was us and Solomon Georgiou.

Yeah, it was a fire hose of charisma. It was going down. Dude. Personality coming out the doors. People loved it. I missed out, I guess. Glendale's never been the same. Brand?

Brand Avenue? Oh, dude. They thought about changing it to Sean and David and Ian and Solomon and Zach Avenue after that. Just didn't quite have the same talks. Did I miss anyone? That was everyone who was there, right?

Yeah, that was everybody who was there, right? I feel like there was... Was Malloy there? No, Malloy wasn't there. We met up with Malloy later. Everybody loves this story, listening to it. Yeah, we're riveting with it. Alright, so your fifth pick. Fifth pick.

Damn. Anyway. All right. So your fifth pick. Fifth pick. Ooh. Damn. Damn. Okay, I'm going to pick this because I think it'll be more fun to talk about than what I actually want to pick. Kosh. Well, first say what you actually want to pick. I'm going to throw Kosh to the wind. Well, I can't because what if somebody else takes it?

Okay. I'll bring it up after the draft. Fair enough. I'm going to take In the Summertime by Mungo Jerry. Fair enough. In the summertime when the weather is nice. Da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da we would listen to 97.1 Kiss and FM which was the oldie station and that would come on all the time so I love oldies man I really do

can I also say and I don't want to backtrack anymore I just went to your mom's Twitter the other day and it was just a picture of you getting liquor poured in your mouth by Tom Cruise and I was like yeah hell yeah

I want to follow Sue I think I said it out loud I want to follow Sue follow Sue Carmel I think it's just at Sue Carmel fucking saint one time who were we talking to

she got involved in a conversation with like me and Killer Mike what Killer Mike because Killer Mike and I were tweeting

at each other and I think Sue Carmel got involved somehow and she was tweeting with Killer Mike oh my god did he tweet her back? Yeah.

Oh my God. Your mom and Killer Mike were tweeting. That's the mix there. I think it was definitely a rapper and I think it was Killer Mike for some reason.

But anyway, I'm sorry. Keep going. If a daddy's rich, take her out for a meal. If a daddy's poor, just do what you feel. That's weird.

That's a weird line. Doesn't that song get dark? It's like the Cheers song where the second verse is like darker, right? It's not that dark but it's just like if she feel. That's weird. That's a weird line. Doesn't that song get dark? It's like the Cheers song where the second verse is like darker, right? It's not that dark, but it's just like if she's poor, fuck it.

You can do whatever. If she's rich, you have to buy her dinner. That's weird. I mean, yeah. Words to live by. I get it. Sorry, I was looking

at Sue Carmel's Twitter. She's got some good tweets. She's dope. Buy the poor girl dinner. I thought that was the dinner. Yeah, the poor girl needs the dinner.

Let her take you out. Yeah, have dad buy dinner, dog. The quality. I also just love saying Mungo Jerry. let her take you out have a dinner dog equality I also just love saying Mungo Jerry Mungo Jerry it feels like a bad word Mungo Mielbrado

Mungo sounds like something you would call like Australian Mungo yeah it feels like an aboriginal slur Mungo sounds like a bunch of Mungos

came in the bar last night it sounds like lost racism but because it's not it's just kind of like a fun word is it not do we know that it's just kind of like a fun word. Is it not? It's what you would call a group

before they became white. Like the Irish would be a bunch of mongos or something like that. Yeah, fucking mongos out there biting each other. Yeah, or like Finnish people. Mongos.

Oh, the Finns are mongos. The Finns are mongos. I'll rip the mic out. What do we need to do? I can see Colin Polak's mongos. I don't even think it's... I don't think Polak's is the good one either.

That does sound a little a little crass you can say Polox I can't I also it like makes me think of mangoes which makes me hungry

oh so it's kind of a double double fun word to say and also makes me make a food is somebody on the internet

look up is that his real name Mungo Jerry can't be somehow I'm guessing no I'm guessing his name's Jerry Jerry's not anyone's

last name and Mungo's not anyone be somehow I'm guessing no I'm guessing his name's Jerry Jerry's not anyone's last name and Mungo's not anyone's first name can you imagine though like being a kid like in elementary school and I'm gonna be like

hi I'm Mungo Jerry you better write a hit song so my teacher's like Mungo Jerry and he's like president oh you know what

it's a group well that makes it a little bit less fun, but still pretty fun to say. It's still fun to say. Mungo Jerry. Mungo. Mungo Jerry.

And then that Matt Costa song totally ripped it off a couple years later. Which Matt Costa song? Oh, Miss Magnolia. He had that one song. Hoopa ba ba, ya da da da da. He literally sings that in the song. I was like, yo, this isn't your song, my dude.

Stay in your non-Mungo Jerry lane, my friend. I feel like Mungo your song, my dude. Stay in your non-Mungo Jerry Lane, my friend. I feel like Mungo Jerry would be flattered. Stay in your non-Mungo Jerry Lane. So that's my final pick in the summertime. Little on the nose, but again, what a nose. Love it. Yeah, okay. David Borey.

Okay. Silent G. So this song wasn't released in the summer, but it was my summer hit in 0huh in 07 yep uh by a young man uh teddy penderass down uh you may also know him as t-pain oh and the song is buy you a drink i used to that fucking summer oh i played that song i that song. I was working construction doing condo maintenance with my boy Dougie Fresh and our boss was an alcoholic. Shout out to Dean

White. He would buy us liquor every Friday and he would disappear because he was drinking beer sometimes and we would just roll around in a Chevy Lumina and this song would come on and we would sing all the words. Yeah. He speaks Spanish in that song. Yeah. He speaks Spanish in that song? Yeah.

T-Pain, T-Pain's an interesting figure. He's a gem. He's like a gem of a human. He is a gem of a human. He's a good, good guy. He's like a good dude, right? He really is.

And he's funny. He's a good improviser. He wears a top hat. He wears a top, he's like kind of like not cool. Yeah. He is, he's kind of like lame,

but the cool one. He raps about Oakley's. Yeah. But like, it just works. And you see his Tiny Desk concert? What? Oh cool one. He raps about Oakley's. Yeah. But like, it just works. And you see his Tiny Desk concert? What? No.

His Tiny Desk concert is so fucking good. I love him. He does that thing where he can kind of dance, but he doesn't ever do it like a lot. Yeah. I love him. I love T-Pain. This song is just, it was such a good summer song. Just like, you bought a bunch of weed.

It's Friday. You're going home. Yeah. And just this song comes friday you're going home yeah and just this song comes on you're like yeah i wasn't buying anybody drinks i was buying weed i don't ever buy anybody drinks except i feel uncomfortable buying a girl not uncomfortable i just don't know how to do it i always feel like i could never every time i've done it i always feel like i could never cold buy a girl a drink just be like hey i don't know it like a drink? I don't know. It just doesn't come up. It's weird about it. I don't even buy, like, I'll buy my friends who are girls a drink when I just have money and I'm, like, feeling it.

And then I feel, like, weird. Like, I'm like, I don't want, like, I just, like, just get a drink. Like, I want you to go have a drink. Just say, hey, I got some money. Let me buy yours. I don't expect anything. There you go. I can't sidle up to someone, a girl at a bar.

Oh, no. I can't sidle. That's probably for the best because the vast majority of those interactions are fucking disgusting. They're bad, right? Horrible. Last time the guy said,

hey, what's your name? And I said, no thanks. And he went, oh, no, sorry. I'm just asking for your name. And I was like, yes. And I said, no, thank you. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I knew crews of girls

who would go out and then like get dudes to buy them drinks and get all drunk. Yeah, it is a thing. Yeah. But then I had a girlfriend who would do that and then sometimes

she'd feed me the drinks. Hell yeah, that's the best. And then we doubled down on this fucking mark. So now it's not shitty anymore because it benefits you. Yeah, no, it was great. I was sitting one time and this dude came up. I was talking to my girlfriend. This dude comes up, starts talking to her and I was like, hey man, you know, it's my girlfriend. You can talk to her. That's absolutely fine.

But I was like, you know, we're together. And he goes, I'm gonna get her a drink anyways. And I'm like, tight. Now we gotta do this? He gets her a drink absolutely fine but i was like you know we're together and he goes i'm gonna get her a drink anyways and i'm like tight now we gotta do this he gets your girlfriend he sets it down yeah he sets the drink down in front of her and she slides it over to me and i start drinking it and uh he gets in between us now and he's like what's up dog and he said something like i'm gonna hit you and i was like the fuck are you talking about then this other dude comes over and uh he's like what's up what's going on like thinking that i was fucking with this kid and i was like he bought my girlfriend a drink. He knew it was my girlfriend and she didn't want to drink it.

So I'm drinking it. And it was his older brother. And he like grabbed him by the back of his neck. And he's like, what the fuck is wrong with you? And like drug the kid. Oh, that's poetic justice.

That's so sweet. Immediately. What a good brother. Just like, he's like, what a good brother. Listen to you little prick. I hope that guy's listening to the podcast.

Oh, that was me. That was my that guy's listening to the podcast. Oh, that was me. That was my brother. Shout out to Nigel. There's no way he's Nigel. I feel like the little brother was named like Levi. Oh, yeah. Or like Derek.

Young Levi and big Nigel. That's such a power move, though. You to drink his drink that he bought your girl. That's what I like to call it. It was like it. It was it. Now that I look back, I would never do that now. But I was like 24 or something. You told him you were like, hey, that's like you can talk to me.

It's fair. You played it. You played it perfect. It's like a weird flex, though, to like look at him and start drinking the drink. No, don't ever. Don't make it seem like you did anything wrong in this situation. It's a proper flex. We were out there wiling.

What are you doing? You're coming in here and then you're like, that's my girl. And he's like, what was his end game? Because if you let him drink, if you should drink it, then you would have been scummed. Yeah. You just played your own game. Yeah, you're going to let him punk you in front of your girl like that? Was he just going to get poured out?

It's like the old saying. If someone fucks your girlfriend, you get to fuck them. That's not it. That's a new saying. I don't know how they do it at Orcas Island, but they're Aristophanes. That's for sure a new saying.

You know the old saying. You know that old saying. What? You know that... It reminds me of another old saying. What kind of crazy iron logic is that? Fair is fair, man. It reminds me of another old saying.

Mielle, it's time for your final pick. Okay. Which has been said at least three times. Has it really? Yeah, well, it's your third appearance, isn't it? Fourth, maybe?

Oh, sorry. I thought you meant that my final pick I've been said five times and times. Has it really? Yeah, we'll see your third appearance, isn't it? Fourth, maybe? Oh, sorry. I thought you meant that my final pick of it's had five times and I was just too deep in the riffs. No, no. I get lost in the riffs. Oh, boy. Oh, I really toil over this one. It's going to be Don't Worry Baby by the Beach Boys. Oh.

Okay. Because for me, Beach Boys is quintessential summer jam, but you can't choose any of the obvious ones because we're just tired of hearing them. Because you hate joy. I hate joy. Yeah. Truly. I only thrive on being unique, and if I'm not, I would rather die.

You thrive on being unique and The Sims. What are the classic ones, like My Sharona? That's not Beach Boys. My Sharona? That's worse than me not knowing Tupac, for the record. David threw Kosh into the wind on that one. California Girls. God damn it.

That's going to carry over to the next one. I mean, the day this comes out, I'll fucking... Good vibrations. I'm just going to go sit in someone's basement.

Oh, yeah. Whatever I get around is actually cold. Surfing USA. Pokemon. God only knows. Yeah. Sloop John B.

I love Sloop John B. How does Don't Worry Baby go? Don't worry baby don't worry baby everything will turn out no you're singing better than they sing are you kidding that's such high praise

they sing so good those harmonies are hard do they yes they do it's so good when it starts up it's like

my Sharona okay I'm gonna shoot you oh I let you down no I hate this bit I hate this bit my my my. Spoken like a true non-Beach Boys appreciator.

May I pick my Corona? That's crazy. No, I don't really appreciate them very much. Just how hard it felt. Like, no, I really don't appreciate it. I really don't appreciate it. I like Wouldn't It Be Nice, but I don't really like it. That's a good song, though, isn't it?

Wouldn't It Be Nice is good, but I like Don't Worry Baby. Because it starts off slow and easy. It's like, well, it's been building up inside of me. Oh, yeah. And you're like, oh, this is kind of pretty. And then the background vocals and they all come in like a boy band. And then it jumps up. Don't worry, baby.

And you're like, oh, okay. I feel soothed. Well, they harmonize it so good. Yeah. Also, Kevin Love's uncle. What? Was one of the Beach Boys. What the fuck?

Yeah. Kayla's uncle? Kevin Love's uncle. Oh, one of the Beach Boys What the fuck? Yeah Kevin Kevin Love's uncle? Kevin Love's uncle Oh my god The basketball player For some reason I thought you were saying That the uncle we just mentioned

That gave him the M&M's Uncle Mark Uncle Mark Uncle Mark Uncle Mark Uncle Mark Ex-member of the Sioux Falls Police Force

Mike Love And Beach Boys Mike Love Biked across the country Wears a Kangol hat Does he? Uncle Mark does yeah The Beach Boys are amazing

If you guys haven't Thoroughly jammed to the Beach Boys You haven't lived I have lived I love it Just cruise on Pet Sounds See what happens Things are gonna get weird

Isn't that like One of the arguably Best albums of all time I would say so Just as an album goes Yeah I would say so People say that That and To Pimp a Butterfly

Just kidding Kind of I'm gonna walk out I do think it's good It's not that good I do think it's good. It's not that good. I do think it's good. Well, Tomatoes to Mottos.

Listen to it again. You know what? I want to start a controversy. Controversy. It's not. It's just homework. We've talked about it already. We don't want to go back and do it. Also, don't love the beats.

No. Don't love the beats at all. I mean, if I wasn't a Thundercat, I wasn't a Thundercat. Yeah. Was it also Danger Mouse producing? Yeah. Crazy? Danger Mouse can make missteps.

I don't know. A lot of them. Okay. Have you seen them? Big old Jufro. Not a good look anymore. That's a middle school look. That's a middle school look.

The Jufro? Because I'm getting mad. Oh, yeah. Don't worry, baby. Excellent pick by Ne-Yo. I'll say later what I was going to pick instead. Okay. Because I don't want to ruin Sean's definite choice.

My heart will go on. Time for you to put baby to bed. Because I don't want to ruin Sean's definite choice. My heart will go on. Time for you to put baby to bed. Yeah, it's going to be fifth and final pick. It's going to be Ski-Lo, I wish. Okay. That's a good summer jam. Did you choose that on the last episode I did with you? On One Hit Wonders?

Oh, shit. Did I? Maybe. I might have. Talking about throwing the cosh. I'm going to throw The fucking David Throw the kosh man Just throw it in a fire

I thought I was So fucking slick Throw it in the other Side of the pillow Over here I'm like Well I bet you Kosh is short for caution

And then I get Fucking four shocked faces Staring at me like You moron It's a misspelling of kush We're gonna throw A kush ball That's actually what We meant this whole time Throw the kush The kush And then I get fucking four shocked faces staring at me like, you moron. It's a misspelling of coosh. We're going to throw a coosh ball. That's actually what we meant this whole time.

Throw the coosh. The coosh. Five shocked faces. Yeah, yeah. I wish by ski low. Yeah, I wish by ski low. Great. Yeah. Yep.

That is a summer jam. That was my like, what, sixth grade summer? That's a good summer jam. Yeah. I want all those things too. I wish I was a little bit taller, y'all. I mean, I'm pretty tall. Yeah, you're

like do you wish you were taller no i don't i always wanted to be shorter because tall skateboarders look stupid how tall are you six two yeah that's too tall you always wanted to be shorter i'm gonna punch you in your fucking neck you'd like to punch me in my face but you can't get up there i'm six two i'm gonna be five nine? What do we want to host, guys? I'll tell you. We want a fucking vest. Do short guy shit. What the fuck are you talking about?

Ugh. Gross. Do short guy shit. Wear a vest. Is that a short guy thing? That is a short guy thing. They're long like their legs. Because they got pieces of flair because they're so short.

They got to spice it up a little bit. Fucking crazy haircuts. Fucking vests. Fucking purple long as their legs. Because they got pieces of flair because they're so short. They gotta spice it up a little bit. Fucking crazy haircuts, fucking vests, fucking purple sneakers. Goatees. Oh, goatees, dude. When I was in sixth grade. Fucking exotic drink orders.

That's all short guy shit. What's the Apollo Anton on official hair called again? Soul patch. Yeah, that's the official soul guy fucking. Apollo Anton. Deep cuts, dude.

That's how you remember what a soul patch is. I could remember him, but not the facial hair. Or like the guy from Creed. Shout out. Scott Stapp. Didn't he have one for a long time? Chad Kroger, the Nickelback dude. He's got like a butthole thing.

Yeah. That dude is shredded. I didn't know there was like short guy culture of mustaches, to be honest. I learned something today. I just think it's flair. It's just flair. It's all fucking. When I was in sixth grade.

You don't think you're too short, do you? I don't think of you as a short person. Okay, how tall are you? Well, I was trying to play football so hard, so just anything that has D lines, so anything... I was like, if I don't make it to 6'1",

this isn't going to work. I feel that. Wait, but how tall are you? 5'10", 11. Okay, fuck off. I'm 5'5". I'm also lying. I'm the only person who knows how to be short.

I'm also totally lying. I'm like 5'8". Okay, fuck off. I'm 5'5". I'm also lying. I'm the only person who knows how to be short. I'm also totally lying. I'm like 5'8". Okay, but you can still reach the overhead compartment on a plane. You can't? No, I have to have people help me and lie behind me humiliating me. You can probably fit in it, little cutie. Do you know how many people I've had unconsentingly just pick me up for fun?

Really? That is fucking crazy. That sounds like it would be the worst. It is. When I was in middle school, people would try to see if they could flip me a full 360

and put me back on the ground. Just because I'm small. They would just run up on you? Totally. They were trying to rob you to be fair. The same friends that didn't come

to my water balloon party, so we'll see. Man, you're painting a picture that's bumming me out more. It must have been real hard for you to defend that pot of gold at the end of your rainbow

when they were doing that. You short motherfucker. I honestly wish that were even true so at least I could have the gold from that spurn. You know what I mean? You know what leprechauns wear? Fucking vests. Because they're short. A lot of flair.

It's coming together. That's why they wear the hat. A lot of flair in a leprechaun. Yeah, they dye their beards red. I think they're just red. It's just Irish. Who's to say? I mean, you know.

Miel, would you say you wish you were a little bit taller? Every day of my life. Really? Do you ever wish you were a baller? Every day of my life. Yeah. All right. If you had a girl that looked good, would you call her?

Absolutely. As a tall baller, I can tell you. It's pretty great. Wait, hang on. Does he say, I wish I had a hat? I wish I had a rabbit and a hat with a bat and a six-form baller. So he loses me a little bit for the rabbit and the hat and the bat, because those are kind of things you're like, well, I mean, does he mean the animal, the bat or a baseball

bat? I think they just run. Maybe a pet bat. I think the baseball bat to put in the Impala. This was like the song came out like somebody trying to break in and steal the rabbit and the hat. Or turn it, spin it around. David Copperfield had never been more popular when the song came out.

So it was like cool to be a magician. I will say that. And Ken Griffey Jr. It was cool. And Ken Griffey Jr. It was real cool. God, he was so cool. He was.

The kid. What a cool nickname. He didn't even like Seattle. He didn't. Only, he was so cool. He was. The kid. What a cool nickname. He didn't even like Seattle. He didn't. Only baseball jersey I ever had. He wanted to live in Cincinnati. What an insane person. He lived in Florida for a long time, too.

What does he do now? Does he live there? He's had him and Ken Griffey Sr. on a, they own a wing shop. It's called Griffey's. Fuck off. Is that true? No, you're fucking kidding me. Who knows?

That feels like it totally could be true. They own a store where they put wax shit on spaghetti. Just like the spaghetti and chocolate shavings. I don't even know if that would be that bad. No, it'd probably be pretty good like a mole. Okay. This is derailed so far.

Ski-lo, I wish. I wish. That rounds out the I wish I had some chocolate spaghetti right now. We left some good summer jams on the board. Ski low ball. I wish. I wish. That rounds out the. I wish I had some chocolate summer. We left some good summer jams on the board. Feel me flow.

Naughty by nature. Summertime by Sublime. Sure. No. Yeah. Cruel summer. Banana Ram. Oh.

I don't like Cruel Summer. I actually am shocked that no one. I don't think Cruel Summer is that great of a song. It feels like a winter song almost. The way that everybody

like loves it. Oh. So many dude. Fuck. I can't believe no one chose where the party at by jagged edge

thought that was obvious I forgot to pick I had a song I wanted to pick number one and I forgot

to pick it completely what award tour by uh tripod quest light goes on

by cougar I like that the ignition remix oh shawty cougar melon jordan I have Slow Motion by Juvenile. Oh.

What was that? Baby when we're grinding. Next. Too close. Yeah, that song. Too close. That's a boner jam. Boner jam.

Boner jams. What about the National Anthem? We have the two people who picked it in this room right now. Fourth of July. Could there be more of a summer jam? We have both the national anthem pickers.

My worry about it is that that's the only day I sing it in the summer. But isn't it what makes you think of summer the most? My country? It's your holiday in summer. I go to so many basketball games that it makes me think of the winter. Well, I think that's on you, because if you're not celebrating baseball, I wouldn't say you're a true patriot. I'm not a true patriot.

Genie in a bottle why don't you go back to London and find some more treasure I might I fucking might it's right next to the leisure it's right next to the leisure

and the pleasure this has been a wacky ride this has been Christina Aguilera Genie in a bottle oh I was gonna pick put your records on

what that is a record it's such a summer jam you know what song i was thinking of and then i thought you guys would make fun of me that corinne bailey ray song oh is that the same song oh fuck me then all right no that's good it's like a song you chose yeah call back call back so that's the thing that's funny what do we uh let's hear these lists out loud ian carmel kicked it off with uh today was a good day by ice cube and then three little birds by robert marley damn it by blink 182

damn it going up country by canned heat and then in the summertime by mungo jerry true story true story and pick zoom zoom zoom from the mada commercial. And then Ghetto Superstar by Maya Peraz and the Old Dirty Bastard. Ride With Me by Purnell. Swimming Pools by Kendrick Lamar. And Let Me Buy You a Drink, Shody Snappin' by T-Pain. Then Miel Bredo. Went and picked The Less I Know The Better by Tame Impala. Say You'll Be There by the Spice Girls.

Everywhere by Fleetwood Mac. Got to Give It Up by Marvin Gaye. And then Don't Worry Baby by the Beach Boys Then Sean Cougar Melon joined went and picked Summertime by Will Smith and then Steal My Sunshine by Len Boo! Fuck off!

L-A-T-E-R! He picked Dang by Anderson.Paak and Mac Miller Hell yeah! and then Picture Me Rollin' by Tupac and I Wish by Ski-Lo What a weird list! Wow! You really like you really nose-dived there and packing Mac Miller. Hell yeah. And then picture me rolling by Tupac and I wish by Ski-Lo. What a weird list. You really like,

you really nose-dived there right at the top and then found your way back up. Listen, if that song got thrown on in the middle of a barbecue, I'm singing along, Sean. If you're high, maybe.

We all are. What is that? High at a barbecue? At a barbecue? Is that how people do at barbecues? What? Yeah.

I'm sorry. You got a Google image barbecue now. It's just meat. It's all meat. You need to intern with us. Just like a summer intern. For a summer. We'll smoke a bunch of weed.

We'll grill some wieners. We'll make some seitan hot dogs for you. Thank you so much. Yeah, we can make you some seitan wings. Seitan wings. Shout out to City of Denver. I like seitan wings. I love seitan wings.

That place is fucking phenomenal that's crazy shit that i don't fully mean but i once said that i prefer the vegan wings at fire on the mountain over the chicken wings i don't really mean that i don't really mean that it's important in denver now i've never been there they're really good because i spent all my time at fucking uh the one with the outdoor bar and the goddamn what's that place open late i know what you're talking about city in plan best city in the world sioux falls south dakota it's funny you're just gonna bring it up no no no it's Sioux Falls, South Dakota. It's funny. You were just going to bring it up. No, no, no.

It's barely even a city. You weren't going to say that? By the by. That's the one. By the by. By the by? By the by. No, it's not called that.

Portland. By and by. By and by. By and by. Yeah, that's not in Sioux Falls. I thought we were talking about Sioux Falls. I'm going to scream until my voice breaks. I don't think we were talking about stripping an elementary school of its copper wiring

to buy meth. So we weren't talking about Sioux Falls. Shout out Elizabeth Colorado, by the way. Shout out most of Oregon. That's where I learned the price of copper by the pound. Thank you for listening to All Fantasy Everything. Tune in again next week. Thank you, Sean.

Thank you, Miel. Anything to plug, by the way, if anyone's listened this far into the podcast? Oh, I got my dates filled out. It'll be on the internet soon, but I got like eight or nine more cities added with all the venues and stuff. Go to David's website. Hell yeah. Come see me in Toronto this weekend.

Hell yeah. I'll be at the Comedy Bar. Denver, the third week in July. It's on my website. Like six shows around town. Cool. Hell yeah. So come out and yeah so come out and say hi we love you everything i do is on the internet and meals all over the all over the place on the worldwide web and if you listen to this come and you come to our show come and say hi definitely give him a wink and go you know why yeah give me a pat me on the butt and tug my ear tell me you liked it give me a little tug around

the come throw throw caution to the wind with me. Caution. We're all cuties. What a dipshit. Buy their girlfriends drinks. All right. Tune in again next week for another brand new episode of All Fantasy Everything. Sha-clackity! that was a hate gun podcast