All Fantasy Everything - Things in the Sky (w/ Laura Sams, Shane Torres)

Episode Date: January 1, 2026

Or if you're Shane, things in the air.Guests:Laura Sams (@lauramsams)Shane Torres (@shanetorres)Support the show!Join the AFE Patreon at patreon.com/allfantasy for ad-free episodes, mailbags, auction drafts, and other exclusive content.Watch the video podcast at youtube.com/@AllFantasyEverything.Advertise on AFE!Advertise on All Fantasy Everything via Gumball.fm.Follow the Good Vibes Gang on social media:Ian KarmelSean JordanDavid GborieIsaac K. LeeSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

This is a headgum podcast. and everything from the world of popular culture. On today's episode, we're drafting things in the sky. Our guest today is one of the most patient people on the planet, I imagine. She carries a burden for humanity. A writer, a producer, a creator, a zoologist, a valedict. Huh? A mother.

A mother? Oh, too, really, when you think about it. A mother, a daughter. What I was going to say was the valedictorian of Michigan State University's graduating class. And we're talking about Shane. We're talking about Shane. You decided to put mother above that. And that's interesting.

That's interesting. You were the valedictorian? In my department. That counts, yeah. Ed doesn't need to be quantified. I would just, I would be like, yeah. I don't know if they have one for the entire college. Thank you for being so pretension.

I'm not, I'm not, again, you're using pretension. wrong over and over again. By the way, the apple is already on the desk. It didn't. No, Shane, you're being a bit pedantic. Thank you. Well, no, he wouldn't. If he was like, the apple's on the desk,

a desk is like a wooden body with four legs. Listen, where are you methodical? No. At the boxing, Jimmy's methodical. Laura Sams is here. Hi. By the way, just to put a pin in that,

not to put a pin in it, to put a period at the end of it? I don't know, dude. I've had so much sodium. Okay. A lot, maybe a semicolon? Because we're continuing. We're continuing.

That's the one that I did on the late, late show, or that's a colon that I did. The two dots. What are you talking now? I did a bit. What bit? About a colon. My body, my chest hair looking like a colon.

That's right. You did a bit about your body. A lot of that got cut out. Yeah. A lot of that got cut out. I don't know if you saw the broadcast version. I got into the edit bay on that one. Got into a tiny 90 seconds.

We got to sell some soda. Get this kid. out of here. Shane Torres is also here. You know, if you love him, he's a stand-up comedian. Welcome. Welcome, everyone. I'm here.

I don't know why I said that. I'm pretty tired. Me too. Yeah. Sean Jordan is here. What's happening? With me as always. David Borey,

underground, usually hovering above Bolivia, but we, because of the draft topic, we wanted to take that out of play. So he's deep underground in a layer. They're going to put a G in front of Bolivia pretty soon if he doesn't stop going there all time. I was going to say so. Yeah, at some point. Oblivia?

Him and the... Oblivia? We're going to put a B in gorillas. Did I tell you that my stepdad asked me, did I tell you the... I must not have told you this. So he looked at me, we was trying to,

he was saying how in the Big Lobowski that Donnie's character... Oh, you did tell me, but please continue. Well, for the listeners, he goes, have you, you've seen the Big Gibrinsky, right? And no one was in the room. No one's in the room,

and I go, hold on. And you walked in, I think. I go, John, say it again. Say what you did. And he's like, he could tell he was wrong. and he goes, I, the Big Jibroonsky. The Big Jibroonsky. You know, the Jibroonsky Underachievers Club.

Yeah. The little Jibrinsky. The little Jibrinski. That's the funniest. It's completely understandable and also the funniest. That's like, you know, if you see it, talking about the Terminator, you've seen the obliterator, right? The Big Jibrinsky is like, what, like the DVD your dad would bring home instead, where

you're like, no. Yeah, yeah. Dad, you idiot. The first time you call your dad an idiot. It's the, God. Yeah, it's the Porky's to Meatballs or whatever. Yeah, yeah. Was Porky's Meatballs?

Was one of those that, because they do those like Transformers DVDs that they hope you'll buy instead where they're like the, you know, it's like the low budget version. Yeah, like the modifiers. Yeah, yeah, yeah. The battle bots or whatever guy. Transmorgifiers that they hope you like pick up instead. It'd be funny if they did that for like Cohen's brothers movies. Oh, my God. A stern gentleman.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Raising Albuquerque. Yeah. Raising Albuquerque. Yeah. It's got Francine McAdershowitz in it.

Even the actors are like, no country for old women. Yeah, yeah. These all have Eric Roberts in them. Yes, land for ladies. Eric Roberts works, dude. He's doing all right. I know Eric, but I think it's because Eric Roberts will take a farewell of Albuquer. He's not doing that, good.

He's, you just love him because of the best of the best. movies. I know how you were introduced to him. Yeah. Yeah. It's sentimental. He's not doing right. My mom hushing me when he's in the final fight scene crying. Nothing more attractive to my mom than a long-haired wetman. Your mom was crying or Eric Roberts was crying? Everybody was crying. Eric Roberts was a long-haired wet man. A long-haired wet man. Don't you. Give me a glass of water. Yeah. You can take a sick of spot any day. How do you feel about a wet-haired long man? John, come here, sit next to me. What about a wet-haired longshoreman?

Does that modify it? Mom, do you like a wet-haired long man who also plays a saxophone? This does look like a group therapy session that Laura is moderating between three longshoremen. There's a little bit of like... Jane and I are like, we know it's his boat, but he's such a dick about it sometimes. Or a Portland design firm. Like this is how we're going to sell oat milk to Gen Z. Yeah, she's like, I don't know, normally say this to my male clients, but maybe you're all too close.

She's always doing stuff like this at work, even, holding the apple. I just want to, I think it might be my new affectation for 2026. Isn't it crazy that it's 2026? Yes. That feels wrong. It's not yet. But it will be? No, when this comes out, will it?

Is this when... This drops Tuesday? Thursday? Thursday? It's still 2020. Oh, actually, no. It will be 2026. You idiot.

We'll leave that part, but cut out what I said. I said, cut out what he said. Hey. There we go. Isaac, make it sound like I'm in an arena full of applauding people. I'm Ian Carmel, your host. This is all fantasy everything. Let's do some plugs.

Let's do some plugs. Let's get them out of the way. Laura Sam's. Yeah. Where can people see you? Well, I am excited to say that I have a podcast. You know, I've told this is the only podcast that has ever existed. There's a second podcast.

This is the second one. There's a second podcast. Yeah, you're standing on the shoulders of giants. My brother and I host a podcast for kids called The Happiest Animal Show. It's a comedy podcast for kids and families who like wildlife. We all base it around the very important question. What animal is making you happy today? It's a good question.

It doesn't have to be your favorite. just today what animal is making you happy. And my brother and I were both zoologists and filmmakers and songwriters. We've worked together forever since college. And so we, yeah, we always quiz ourselves to see if we can guess each others. We write an original song for every episode.

And then we have special guests from comedians to scientists to kids. It's super fun. And what's it called again? The happiest animal show. The happiest animal show. And people can find it wherever. I'll go ahead and talk.

All the places are podcasts. podcast, you can fight it. It's a bright yellow icon with a happy, the happiest animal show has a little smile on it. Oh, that's phenomenal. Yeah. Now, do you, when you say podcast, are you imagining P-A-W? Yes.

Yeah. Whoa. It's a podcast. A paw. A pos-a. If you're looking for an introduction episode. Yeah. Listen, I'll go.

Go ahead and let shame talk. Go ahead and let's change. But I stole that bit from you. Have there been any AFE alumni that have been on the show? Yeah. And soon there will be others. Oh, shit. Once I invite you.

I'd love to do it. I'm excited. I live with you. I appreciate you avoiding director. I can't tackle it. I'm happy to invite you. I don't know if you want to do it. Shane's favorite animal.

My dad said we couldn't have a dog because he didn't want us. I just got a tattoo of a monitor. Yeah. David was on. Talked about sea turtles. Yeah. The Slart brothers were just on. Oh, Randy and Jason.

They're the best. Yeah. David does love sea turtles. Yeah. I love sea turtles. I think he said once he's like he understands them on a level. Like they make sense to him as an animal. Yeah, someone in Hawaii and made eye contact, right?

Yeah. Like, well, you would know. You had one. Yeah, he made eye contact with one. He was really having a moment with a sea turtle in an aquarium in northern Kentucky. It's one way. I've filmed there before. It's a beautiful aquarium.

And, but then right as he was having this spiritual moment, it swam nose first into the glass. Yeah. And then it's nice. A little quick, what animal's making you happy today? Elephant seal. Okay. Yeah. I'm not I'm having seen all the dogs in Portland again it's nice yeah it always I don't

it was taken into the phone it yeah yeah there it goes seamless you see the face like mani what animal's making you happy today they were nice stuff specifically my dog yeah show us jumps up into my spot in the morning after I use the restroom and just like she's like I won't like 20 minutes of cuddles oh yeah every morning and you Sean I didn't think that I like foxes yeah foxes Foxes are good I've never seen a fox in the wild I never have

You don't see a red like that anywhere else Yeah Yeah Until I met Laura That is Had a babe Nice

I saw a fox in the wild Shant saw fox in the wild Shant saw fox in the wild Never thought about that Curious Comedy Theater Yeah There I was On that age

There's a beach in between L.A like outside of Carpenteria Where there's like It's full of elephant seals And they're so They're just like Plopping around

Are the elephant seals the ones that are like on the docks in Seattle and stuff? Those are sea lions. Yeah, those are probably California sea lions. What's an elephant seal? Elephant seals like a giant, they have kind of a weird snout. What would you call that a proboscis? Yeah. Proboscis.

They would like... No, that's a cookie. You're very proboscow yourself. You are a proboscow man. Yeah. They're loud. Their noses will fling when the males are calling. Like the ladies.

A little, a little bit. They make very funny noises. Yeah, they're very funny. And they have little babies that call like, meh, mea, meh, pretty cute. We did this thing on our podcast called the Dark Side of Pet Influency. A third podcast emerges. Oh, okay.

All right. Yeah, we're all standing on the podium. The third podcast is in the town. It was called the Dark Side of Pet Influencing. Oh, no. And David was the guest. And I just like, I listed all these, like, pets, like, influencers, like, Jif Palm, which is, like, a huge, yeah.

And then I just made up a bunch of fake things that they did. And we read them, like, off a teleprompter. One guy got so mad and, like, Jif Palm did not do that. Like, people were insane. But, like, I wrote jokes that were, like, like, 9 million followers. There's Jif Palm Day in L.A. All these things were real. And then I'm, like, also, a very controversial stance on the war in Palestine.

Belief. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Calls the Civil War, the War of Northern Aggression. Yeah, yeah. That's kind of thing. Yeah. Many of these elephant seals do have pretty retrograde views. Yeah.

I know I do. Keep your distance. Yeah. Keep your distance. That's why they say stay 100 yards from that. Stay, give them 100 yards. You don't want to be close to those views. They will start doing COVID denial stuff.

No insert. California, really. What's it like there? You come into my 100 yard truth bubble, brother. Get ready for it. Get ready for it. Yeah. Oh, brother, where are you?

That's another one. Nice. Yes. Good. Good. That would work. Does the pee on your head stand for a pretty good callback or what? I'll tell you what the 47 stands for.

It's a hat company. Trump. Well, you just found that out. I didn't realize that. I was wondering why I bought this hat and it says 47 on it. And I didn't know why. And it's a hat company. And you thought the piece said for Trump the way Teradactyl spelled.

Trump. Trump. Oh, God. My stepdad thought you could buy Coke in Portland, so I bet I could sell him. on that. Like, you know, there's a P. You know he had the P removed. It just depends on where you've got to get it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Anyway, yeah. I'm sitting here still trying to think of a Cohen

brother's pun. I haven't gotten a good one of. Plasma simple. You're just doing one word and the title. I like it. I flinched. I thought he was going to give it. The count, the canticle of Bing Bongscribitty Bob. The Budsucker proxy? I don't know. Did you imagine it? The general comes home like, hey, I got you the butt sucker process.

Oh, fuck. Do you have any dates coming up? Oh, I don't know. Consider this my burn note. It's burn after reading. Oh, God, damn it. It's char after looking over. Yeah.

Burn before reading. I do that. Dispose after perusing? Shane iscom.com. I have a podcast with Catherine Blayford called The Coastal Idiots and we release every Tuesday and release an old episode

every Thursday. You release an old episode? Well, like we were just on YouTube in the beginning so now that we have the Spotify and video because there's so much sketch element stuff to it like we're trying to like feed the album. In those ones on Thursday

do you have someone softly explaining what's happening in the sketch? Shane is wearing a jacket one size too small. Shane is in a thrift story. Why is it an insult? You're like, Shane is wearing a jacket that's too small? I thought that would be the premise of a sketch where you come in, like that could be,

let me retake that. Why don't you do that? Why don't you take that? Shane Torres. Look inside your selfie. Shane Torres smells like an aquarium in northern Kentucky. Anyway, I'm a podcast and I got asked to do this one. Yeah, but it's, it's fun and it's, um.

Shane got his hand stuck in a pickle jar. I never mind. I just, I'll stop. Follow me on socials so I don't have to do this. He has not yet figured out that he needs to let go of the pickles. To retrieve his hand. Now that there's video on Spotify, we're on all the other stuff. But that's what's going on there.

Nice. I found my other name for you the other. I texted Sean so I'd remember. Was it the Big Jibrinsky? It's the Big Jibrinsky. Sean Jordan is here. Sean Coor-Mell and Jordan on Instagram. So are any of your dates?

Just go to your website. Do you have anything, like, especially pressing coming up? Not in the immediate. I have, what do I have, I have some support dates with John Mullaney. So I know he doesn't need me to plug those. He's doing fine. Very nice. And then I will be, oh, there's a new club in Lawrence, Kansas.

I'm playing the big markets. Ooh, bleeding. Bleeding, Kansas. Buddy Nick lives in Lawrence. Oh, shit. He'll be the person who shows up. But, yeah, it's. So I'll be out there the first week of February, and then I'll be at Moon Tower in Austin doing a live podcast with Catherine and some other episodes.

And then you'll probably see me around L.A. a bunch this year. Party at the Moon Tower. Yeah. When are you moving out? To where? L.A. I'm not moving to Los Angeles. Get out there.

No. Come on. If I was going to go back to the West Coast, it would be back to Portland. L.A. No. Why? Are you, what are you Googling right now? I'm trying to figure out this name I came up for you.

He's looking up apartments for you. That's why he keeps, that's why he's building on the 80s. at the back of their plane. Hey, Shane, you got to sleep in my, you got to sleep in my old Prius this week. My mom's coming to town. Also, like, just take down some of these stupid posters.

Slint? You don't even like slint. I love slint. Yosemite sampler platter. I thought you'd appreciate this stuff, right? Like, you know they do this, right? Like, this is, yeah, okay. Yeah.

All right, yeah. I appreciate you, like. It started with Wyatt Burt. No. And Doc Hollande is. I have no dates to promote. Sam said Leroy Frown was the one that hurt. That's a good one.

That's my favorite. Come see us at a sports drink in New Orleans. March 19th. Shane will be there. That's going to be a whole lot of fun. I have no other dates. I got to, I'll be in Seattle. Oh, do we not do your dates?

We didn't. Sean Cougar, Melon, Jordan. Please, no, go ahead. Seattle, tomorrow and Saturday. So I'll be at last comedy club. Come on out. I get a bonus if a lot of people show up in. I just got hit with a $4,400 car bill. That's more of a we situation. Yeah. It doesn't even have to be we. I don't think he wants all of this. Laura got hit with a $4,400 car bill yesterday. That's crazy. Over half of it is a recommended fix, though. That really got under my skin all night. is a recommended fix.

One of them that check engine lights on, though. They're like, it's like an oil leak. They're like, you got to fix this. But the other one, they're like, you should, we recommend you do this at 100,000 miles. But they put it in there like it's part of a required fix. But you said it's at 90,000. It's at 90, right now. It's only recommended at 100,000.

Wait, did you pay it already? No. What is the issue? Timing chain. The pin and the camshaft is off. And so the camshaft isn't aligning with the timing chain correctly. and somehow that messes up the engine. If it gets more and more off, the engine will just die.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. So that has to be fixed. But then the timing chain that goes around it all, apparently, just stretches over time. And we let you explain that because we don't assume gender. I only know it because my dad explained it to me last night thoroughly. It's great to have my dad here when we knew car problems. He also explained it to me thoroughly and I could not. I don't really, if I opened a car, hood, hood, there's a bit.

If I open the trunk, you'd be like, where? There's the goddamn engine. If I open the hood. He gets in and starts to drive from back there. If there was a little pot-belly pig on a wheel and that was part of an engine, I'd be like, oh, okay, yeah. So we've got to feed the pig. That's the issue. If there are any mechanics that make you happy, I do like a pot-belly pig.

Yeah. Oh, I love a pocket. If there are any Portland area mechanics that listen to this show or no. So you're just coming right out. I just, I don't know any mechanics. I don't want it for free. I want a recommendation. I got one.

I don't, you do. We'll talk off, Mike. Yeah. Okay. Tight. Let's do it on Mike. It'll be really interesting. Madison Automotive.

Oh, there you go. Oh, I would never go there again. Yeah. Any other recommendations? I'm open to any representation. That could have hurt your business. I'm sorry. Somebody recommend a mechanic they trust.

That's what I'm asking for because I just don't know any. Do you have what? You don't have one in L.A.? Like, don't you feel like? We just get a new car every time. When it runs out of gas. We're doing well. We have been talking about that.

We have a sale. We have a sale that we put up. You know what Laura wants... Takes the wind. They're greens. Laura wants me to get one of those three-wheel cars that assholes drive. She's like, just get one of those. Well, the ones with no roof.

Yeah. We'll duct tape a car seat somewhere on it. Any car you drive is the one that asshole's... Laura. Got him. Booyah. It hurt my feelings when he even said that. That's why I said it.

I'm just glancing back and forth at them if you're listening. Well, Christ, you'll be in Seattle. Come see him. Come see them do stand up. And New Orleans. It's going to be fun. Others will be there. Very, great one.

There's an amazing lineup. My big sister will be there. No, she will not. Really? Jessica Blaylock, yeah. Just coming to come? She's never been New Orleans. She's not going to be hanging out with us the whole time.

No, she shouldn't. She should see something else. Yeah, yeah. That's great. Yeah, older sister, Jessica Blaylock. That's awesome. Showing up. Not mentioned enough on here.

Everyone else in my family, I think. I also have an older sister. Jessica Blahela. She rules. And then I imagine once my mom hears that I will be there and Jess will be there, Sue Carmel's going to be there too. But she might be in Arizona for a baseball tournament with my older brother, Bear. You sound like a six-year-old right now.

It's like a new one. It's like a new addition to the Knives Out series. I don't get why that's funny, but I did laugh. And I've seen all the knives out. out because they're capers. You know, well, yeah, you were like saying, yeah, from different places. All these different characters. My mom is Jamie Lee Curtis.

Yeah, yeah, I'm, I'm not anybody in those movies. You're Benoit, you're Benwa, uh, Benoit. Benoit. Benoit. Yeah, yeah, yeah, you're Benoit. Benet Blanco. I actually like that oneia blanco. I'm wearing seersucker suitor suits all the time.

I have a serious sucker suit. Where did you wear it? I haven't worn it yet. My neighbor gave it to me. Oh. Mm-hmm. Which is, I feel like the best way to get a serious soccer suit.

That's the kind of relationship you have with your neighbor? You don't worry about what's going on. I'm fucking, dude. Oh, shit. Please edit that. Isaac added that out. Isaac added that out.

My street name specifically. You don't know what's going on on. Where do you live? Larchmont. Larchmont. I live on Rodeo. Rodeo Drive. You live in a palace.

I got a bachelor pad in L.A. The Lord doesn't know about it. Palace of Fantasy. I can't imagine that's true. The reason. I'll be in Seattle next weekend. Bachelor Pat on Radio. A joke that's not working, even though I keep doing it.

None of us think it's funny. None of the, nobody out there in radio land thinks it's funny either. Just keep going. We're going to have continuity problems since you ate the apple when the board went down. Look at that. Look at that. If you're watching and that just happened. the whole time.

Yeah. Fucking crazy, dude. I'm joking. I thought it was funny and you're always funny. Thanks, man. One of the funniest dudes I know. One of. I'll take it.

You know a lot of funny people. You. Josh Gad. Joshua. Joshua Gad. Olaf, who I think is a different person than Josh Gad. I think Olaf is real. Trusky, dude.

Liam Neeson. Yeah. Do you see Liam Neeson doing Santa Claus on Colbert? No. Pretty funny. Yeah. Watch it. We're gathered here not for me to recommend other late-night shows.

One of the ones that I haven't worked on. And I think probably won't, given its face. And not unless you get hired in two days. We're here to draft things in the sky. Yeah. That was your idea. Where to come from? I don't know.

Now, to be specific, it's things in the sky, not things in this guy. Well, right now it's Wayvos Ranchero. We've drafted plenty of junk food. God, do you. stuff. A mouse. It hasn't quite congealed yet. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

A desperate need of approval. A bottomless chair. Things inside Shane would be truly. It would be fun. A cowboy button. A cowboy button. A sense of whimsy. Now, the way we determine the order of this draft is a rollicking game of rock

paper scissors played between the three of you when we throw on shoot. All right. Here we go. Okay. Rock, paper, scissors, shoot. Ooh, we got to go again. Rock, paper, scissors, shoot. Shane wins.

I'm a rock against two scissors. That's inside me, too. Shane, the Rock Johnson. Shane the Rock Johnson. I tell you, this is dumb, and I hate that I was saying this right now, but I had a dream that I met him, and he called himself Dwayne the whole time. Hey, man, I'm doing. It bothered me. It bothered me so much in my dream.

I bet he would. He bothered you? Yeah, because he was like, I was like, well, you're the wrong. rock. Yeah. Like people call you rock. Yeah. Yeah. I think it was like a sign of respect. Like he's saying, this is my name. I'm Duane. I want you to know me on that level. Yes. Tell me what my dreams.

Come here, man. Come here and know me better, man. That's what you say. That maybe that's, I didn't, I misinterpret things all the time. Much like the ghost of Christmas present. Speaking of, I call him the ghost of Christmas gift. That was all right. It was okay. It wasn't good.

Really. Not a good joke. It was Alright. Go ahead. You had something better. I think if we wouldn't have spent this much time on it, you know what I mean, if it had been something we saw at the window and said we pulled over and we stopped. I should have. Yeah, we should have kept going. Please go ahead. This was Maxine's first Christmas and she was like fully online. Like, you know, like kind of knows what's going on. How was it? It was great. Yeah. It was really pretty magical. We went and saw so many lights. Yeah. And that was awesome. Did stuff like made the living room perfect to walk into Christmas morning. Yeah. That was a big thing where it's like got all this stuff. Just all the. Just all the. stuff. Like we put the ottoman behind the couch, made it so it looked like she just walked into a sea of presents and the lights and stockings. It was, it was awesome. Yeah. And she met Santa at her preschool. Her preschool had a special event where you can have your picture taken. Wow. We anticipated she would ask, is it the real Santa? It's the first thing she asked. We told her we were going to go see Santa's at a real Santa. And then we were like, oh, it's like a Santa's helper. There's lots of Santa's helpers because Santa's busy. But Santa was there. Mrs. Claus was there.

elf and she was pretty nervous. She didn't want to go up right away. Yeah. Then she learned that she was going to get a candy cane and a sticker if she did go up. That'll do it. And then suddenly she was like, no, wait a second. And then yeah, it is a big currency. Stickers are a big deal. So then she got in line. She went up there. We had a family photo taken. Yeah. She didn't really talk much to Santa, but then because he asked what she wanted and she just was too nervous to say. For sure. So then there was an elf next to her and the elf said, you can tell me. And then Mac, just whispered as quietly she possibly could

I want a unicorn sparkles and a unicorn sparkles in a second and I was trying really hard to listen because I was like we got to get this right yeah yeah yeah and the elf is like $30 I'll tell you yeah yeah yeah I'm betraying your child's trust yeah yeah but it turned out to be a sparkles

a tiara unicorn exactly what she got is also a skateboard and a bottle of jack I don't know we'll just keep those on the other in the west wing Yeah, it was great, man. She was hype. She didn't like, she was cool about the presents.

She opened one and she wasn't freaking out about more. Yeah. Stuff that you want. Yeah, you're doing a good job. Did you push the one she wanted first? No, it was just in there. And when she found it and she opened it, she was stunned. She just kept pulling it to her chest and smiling.

And she goes, I get it. Christmas is when you get presents that you love. And she was just holding it. And it couldn't have been more perfect. You're like... Pretty rad. Yeah. That's great.

It was great. She had a great time. Last year we tried, I was like, oh, let's put... I mean, we left cookies out and a note to Santa. Yeah. And Santa wrote back this year. It was super fun. But last year, I was like, oh, let's put footprints on the ground like Santa was in the house.

Really going for it. Yeah. And we used flour and made all these footprints. And then Maxine, she was three at the time. She was looking at the flower footprints and she just goes, these are, this is like, this is like when we make cookies. And this is, and she's like, why, why was Santa in the kitchen? Was he cooking? A little baby logic.

And she was so many questions. And I was like, I don't know. Oh, yeah. So we kept it simple this year. Just open your gifts. You do start talking a lot. When she asked her the real Santa, I could tell because you talk too much. Oh, he talked way too much.

When you're fabricating. He's a helper. He went on this whole thing in the car. I think he went to Tulane. He said he's busy, but he's busiest, you know, on these specific. days you went into this whole explanation he's back on the apps it's been a while

he's on right yeah he's on Raya he is yeah he actually there's a union of Santa yeah yeah yeah regional there's districts yeah yeah yeah direct this at you so I don't know if if you go to Powell's they have a bunch of free stickers

just up at the uh that's good to know yeah Maxine now just asks at any counter everywhere checking out if they have stickers she has to plaid pantry the other day you can see have any stickers and they go no but he's like teddy bears and they had a little teddy bear and they gave her a teddy bear really yeah all right plaid yeah close mouths don't get fed you know what I mean yeah I had no idea

the money I've spent a plight pantry never gave me a teddy bear give me a bad attitude a couple times yeah I got some muddy bears but I had to pay for him yeah uh Shane as the winner of rock paper says it is it coming upon you to determine the order today's draft but before you do that I will remind you it is a serpentine draft you know what you just put and what I'll tell you what that is yeah would you explain it to me please yeah I would really like to know. That's so funny. And after all these years, you can still terrify me.

The tone. Yeah, would you explain it to me, please? Did you go to Michigan State? I sure didn't. It's like passing out presents to a whole family. Perfect explanation. In what order? Well, basically, if you pick fourth in the first year and you pick first in the second round,

since he's incapable of. Great. Also, that explanation doesn't include Jews or Seventh-day Adventists. There are no presents, right? No, I don't get any presents. That's fine with me.

It aligns with this happen. He is, Randy. Randy, keep it in. Randy, make it sound like it's happening just outside of Nuremberg. Oh, sure. And while we're at it, can we please put Sean in a glass case?

Shane, with that in mind, what would the order of today's draft? We'll go, Laura, her marital property next. All right, Sean, Dr. You making it all confusing. Yeah, and then I'll go third, and Ian, we'll go in the hot corner. Hot corner.

The order of the draft of Things in the Skies, Laura, Sean, Shane, Ian, George Carmel, whole name. And we're going to get to that first pick of Laura's right after the short break. Hi, I'm Beck Bennett. I thought I was Beck Bennett. No, no, no, no. I'm Kyle Mooney. Sorry about that. Exactly.

No, all good. All good. Yeah, and we host the show What's our podcast here on HeadGum? But we want to make sure you heard about a very special episode with a very special guest that we just released in the feed. Yeah, it's in the feed. It was sponsored by Squarespace because they were appalled. We didn't have a website for our show yet.

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I don't think we have time for that. Is it a person? No, it's not. It's Finn Wolfhard. But Finn had a bunch of great ideas for the website. Beck, you had some amazing ideas for the website too. Thank you, you had some amazing ideas for me. Well, I was sort of driving the thing.

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Just know that there's a hippo video and know that you're going to want to watch that. We had a lot of fun making this episode. We allowed fun to make this website. Best time of my life, honestly. I think you're going to have a fun time listening to it and maybe even watching it. Think of it as our little Christmas present to you. Yeah, yeah, this is a gift for you, okay? It's just like, it's a selfless thing we did for you.

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my favorite animal. No, that's not what called? Yes? The happiest animal show. The happiest animal show. You're thinking of my my favorite murder. My favorite murder. Yeah, yeah, yeah. The happiest animal show. Yeah. And that's it. Really? Yeah. That's it. Those are the only two. Itteets. Coastal idiots. Psych dude. Coastal idiots. No, no. No, that's fine. Well, have me as a guest. I intend to. Okay. It's Catherine doesn't like you. The first printed. Are you seeing this? The first printed I printed it out. Ever.

As far as I recall. I didn't want to bring a laptop. The first printed list were the Ten Commandments, Sean. Had a bad. And they were etched in stone. On tablets? Is that right? Tablets.

Yeah. Yeah, they had iPads back then. Because Moses got a little like fussy on the plane. Things in the sky. Things in the sky is the topic. I do have a question about this. Yes. I took things in the sky to mean things in the air.

Mm-hmm. So. You move it closer? That was also for everybody listening. So things in the air, it... The sky is the air. Yeah. I opened it up.

I thought I had to... I cracked it open, dude. I think we all know, like, I'm just going to kind of say whatever I think. Yeah. Shane got the pit opened up on this one. We'll find out. Yeah, I'm excited to find out.

Okay, okay, good. Laura, you have the first pick. Yeah, I'm going to start 100% on-brand, very straightforward, a bald eagle. Oh, yeah. That's up there for sure. Yeah. It's an animal? America's bird.

It's America's bird. In more opinion, America's bird has got to be scholar Johanson. Proper. The bald eagle. What do you love about the bald eagle? I love seeing one flying around. They're, and we do see them around here. They're way more common than I knew they were.

Like when I moved out here, they're like, once a month. Well, they have banned in South Dakota. Yeah. We don't like them. Much like the Department of Education. You know, they know them just out there with their gun all the time. Ready. Do you not have them in South Dakota?

No, I don't. I don't think. You are? Yeah. But, yeah, well, they're the birds that way. I don't know how to make a hot pocket. Are you okay? Yeah.

I know how to make a hot. Well, because I had to ask her if we have that bird in my own state. Yeah, I know. Yeah. I mean, they're easy to recognize because they got the white head. Yes. I feel like it's accessible. They're awesome.

They have huge nests. The nests are so big. Long. They can weigh up to two tons. What? Birds can? No, not the birds, the nests. Oh, I was like.

That would be a big national. The peanut gallery is like, well, that's a big bird. Yeah, yeah. It's just like a flying Volkswagen. That damn school bus flying. around up there. I think I can fucking ride that thing. That'd be sick.

Yeah, I just, I think it's like special when you see one. Yeah, I like, watching them fish. Yeah, we saw one this summer. Speak on it. At our family's cottage, it came just flying, soaring, dropping out of the air to grab a fish right in front of our little dock and flew away. And it caught one. It did. Yeah.

Do you identify the fish? Karen. Gerald. Gerald? Yeah. No, it was our boy, Gerald. Really? Sorry, buddy.

So it was a white fish. Yeah, like Gerald Wallace. Well, I wouldn't be a white fish. I actually don't remember what kind of fish it was. There's little bluegills and pumpkin seed there. It wasn't a bald eagle. It was a hawk, but I was in Central Park. Dominique Wilkins?

There you go. I was at Central Park on a date, and this woman was feeding squirrels. And my date and I were watching her. and then a hawk just came down and grabbed the squirrel right in front of her yes it's funny yes and i erupted in laughing yeah what did you date do it didn't go far and the woman just looks at us and she had this thick european ass eastern european accent and she goes i just want to feed the squirrels i escaped belarus for this yeah oh it's pain everywhere.

Vladimir Putin sent hawk. Not this time, Vlad. Next time I will not be so lucky. Big meeting today. Bald Eagle, that's a great pick. It is so thrilling when you see one. It is. Straightforward.

We saw one of the big nests. The one time I've done a lakehouse situation up in northern Wisconsin with Dana's family. We saw a big old bald eagle. That's very cool to see. Yeah. Yeah. I don't know if I've ever seen. I'm sure I have, but I don't have a moment.

I don't have a memory attached to it. I've seen a bald eagle. Yeah. They've seen you. I don't care if it is two tons. I'm not picking him up. I don't think they get the holes in all those bagels in New York. It's eagle plucking them out.

You know the bald eagle is the most Jewish bird. Definitely. I'm not qualified to speak on that. Absolutely. It's called the bald regal. The bald regal. Thank you. Yeah.

Very nice. I think it's funny that an animal is chosen as a symbol of a nation. Yeah. The bald eagles don't know, but we have chosen this thing. They're like, there's like, yeah, yeah. Ben Franklin wanted it to be the turkey. The wild turkey. Yeah.

Well, there's hella bald eagles up in Canada, right? And they don't care. Yeah. They're just like, there it is. Yeah. There's another freaking bird, bud. Yeah. Well, they weren't there, but then Vietnam happened and a lot of them had to go.

They wanted to avoid the draft. Tearing the draft card leaving on our side. Well, that is like, that it would be interesting, like, because other nations have like birds, whatever, like, all kinds of animals. that they represent them in, like, flowers, whatever. UK or England has, like, the lion that's, like, there, which is the lion bird. Which tells you all you need to know about England, where they're like, yeah, the one from Africa. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

We'll go ahead and take that. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Our favorite food is curry. Yeah, yeah, national animal is the lion. Yeah. I, yeah, I wonder, like, I, so they could eat a bald eagle in another country. I don't know if it's, like, is. Here it is illegal.

What? Here it is illegal in California. I think that is also an interesting thing to be like, oh, we have bald eagle on the menu here in the Ukraine. Let these tariffs stick around much longer. Canada will be grilling up those bald eagles. For gosh sake. Isaac cut that.

And make it the social media clip. Hey, a camera. That's a lamp. Is that what that is? Yeah, dude. been seeing him forever. Frigg. Sean Jordan, it's time for your first pick. Exploding fireworks.

Nice. Not deads. Exploding fireworks. I'm going to say that pretentious coffee shop down. Pretentions again, I said it. I'm going to go in there. Let me get some exploding fireworks. Can I get some exploding fireworks?

Are you picking your summer school name or are you picking you? Everybody pick a screen name for your laptop. That was the joke I was looking for. Hi, guys. I'm your counselor. Exploding fireworks. Welcome to Camdenamano. My name's Exploing Fireworks.

The color works were Friday. We did. We were our counselors when we went there for our like, we were supposed to get married and then we had to call the wedding. So we went to Camdenamano. Because of COVID. Because of COVID. Yeah.

We just got a big fight. We tabled the wedding for a while. It's off, right? Yeah. Got a big argument about a car. I don't remember her name. It was a star, Blaze. Yeah, it was something type.

Something. Yeah. Blaze tank tongues 420? Probably something like that Just teaching us about the stars Yeah Exploing fireworks It's blowing up

It's dope Yeah That's true I love them Yeah I know a lot of people Are against fireworks For a lot of it

For animals Aminals Is it animals or animals Thank God you're here I've always wanted to ask Is it aminals or animals? We've been going back and forth For a decade on that

Because they call me the manimal They call you the man witcher Yeah, I mean, I don't, we don't need to, like, it's pretty simple. Just fireworks blowing up. They're fun to look at. I know animals hate things. Now I feel, now it's like I'm in my head about it. Like dogs and birds and all that stuff.

But like, I still like seeing it. Trust me. I get furious at the fireworks going off, but I like looking at them. Yeah. I get really mad in the house. Like, I'm walking around. Yeah, he takes it personally now around the 4th of July, becomes one of those kermudgins that's like

I get Christmas story He does And just because he's worried about Max Not sleeping but she's fine She's sorry, I threw it Like if they happen like on the second Like you're upset Yeah, he can't even believe

Or early This year they were going on Or 4th of July They were going on for like a week Yeah Yeah Get off me You know

This might happen in L.A And maybe it happens here But like Oftentimes fireworks will just be set off randomly In New York And you're like Oh

It's a holiday for those people Yes, right exactly. Yeah. Because it'll just be like one. I'll be like, hmm, I guess, uh, there's a Croatian. I guess Spain won. Right. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Puerto Rico threw off the yoke of something on this day. Yeah, yeah. I don't know what happened, but they're having a good time. And I like the way they make their egg knock. Yeah. Yeah. You do love Puerto Rican eggnog. Coquito.

Yeah, I love it. Yeah. Really, really great. Yeah. We, Nick and I, Nick Nampay, not in the studio, not on the podcast. Me, Dana, Nick, and his lady friend went to Broder, it's called here in Portland. Oh, yeah. Like a Scandinavian restaurant, and they have something called Glog?

Glog? Glog? Glog? Glog? Glog. It's called Glog? Glog. And it's like a Scandinavian beverage.

It's also a metal band from Scandinavian. It's like a boozy poterie. Oh, it's like the best way I could glog. How was it? Is it? We didn't have it. So this is where the story ends. You didn't see, you didn't get eyes on it or anything?

Huh? You didn't get eyes on it or anything? No, I did have some hard eggnog, though. I'll tell you this one. Eggnog that had been to prison. For a real crime, not for Grand Theft Auto or anything. Glog. You got to rename it.

That's not a good. Yeah, it sounds thick. It is very good. Well, it's not like milk is an amazing sounding name either. Malk, though. Malk. Leche sounds sexy as hell. milk if you didn't know what it was i think that is a sexy name i think milk is sexy

as a name milk well what you don't like l okay hold on hold on where are you at log yeah it's working for lechay let's let'set letcherous is it a lech like a pervert though yes so lechay is rude it's a milk boy it's a milk boy yeah fireworks blowing up but a goddamn letcherous milk boys hanging out I didn't like it either I'm sorry Sounds like something Bill the butcher

would have said God damn Letcherous milk boys This is a kill This is a kill This is a kill I might bring the mustache back Because when I

When I have the mustache Sometimes I look a little bit A little bit A little bit Just a little Like Daniel Day Lewis With a milkshake Yeah with a milkshake

Yeah Do I look good with a mustache? I'm glad Now we're really getting into it. What do you think? I like... How much of a mustache? I like this amount of beard with a longer mustache.

Like double this on my mustache. Yeah. I can handle it. Wow. So that's a no. That's a very nice note. If you feel good in it, then it's good. Not really.

But yeah. I want to think you're looking at me. I'd like to think that you're looking at me. I'd like to think that you're looking at. him in the air with this. I want to think you're looking at the most attractive version of me to you. And with a mustache, that is not what happened.

Unless there's a time machine. See how he is? Yeah. This is what he's like. What do you think about clean-shaven, Sean? I prefer bearded Sean. Yeah, yeah, yeah, for sure. Clean-shaven is wild.

He looks a little wet when he's, like, a little like dewy. This commercial that we did like over Christmas, clean-shaven. like, are you sure? Like I said, I was like, I don't look great. Yeah. Clean-shaven. And they're like, well, the producer wants, you know, nothing. I'm like, okay. You did another commercial? Yeah. Is it the first we're finding out about it? Like for the icon. It was an internet commercial. It was on Instagram.

Oh. A real. Doesn't count. You should be ashamed to your cell. They called it a commercial in the email, Galdarna. That's awesome. What is it for? It's for icon pass, like a snowboard, like a countrywide lift pass essentially like a national parks pass almost. Are you playing a snowboarder in it? A clean-shaven snowboarder? Yeah, like a snowboard husband. Or you're the guy who blows a whistle and tells

him to slow down. Get out of here, you kids. That's good. Stop blowing off your fireworks. You can't keep swearing in there. I'm like, well, kids piss me off. It's January 8th. It's way too early, guys. It's always January 6th to me. So it's a far-right snowboard pass? Far right there.

Shane, time for your first pick. What was in the air that day? Sean took exploding fireworks. Okay, well, I took it to mean in the air, and I don't know if that's allowed or not. So is this a Phil Collins' base? Yeah, I know. No, it's actually not.

I didn't, yeah, I didn't go that. You're going to do fifth round first kind of thing? Fifth round first one? It means make your weird pick in the first round. Oh, I see what I'm saying. Okay. music in the air That's an expression

Do you mean like when you're walking through What's your neighborhood in New York? When you're walking through the East Village And the city speaking to you And man, that car horn That's a little bit like a trumpet, huh? Oh wow, then you probably listen to it on vinyl. Yeah, if it's Wayne Shorter playing the car horn.

Oh, wow. I wish your love of jazz would be shorter when you explain it. Oh, I'm waiting shorter. I got it, I got it, I got it. That was good. They were funny. Yeah.

So when Laura suggested things in the sky, you're like, music. Well, I thought, I took air and sky. I found them to be interchangeable. I mean, I guess sound travels in the air, so. I think it works, but it's going to get worse. So that was my best. I'm going to tell you this right now. That was certainly my best one.

That was the best. Okay. Okay, great. Yeah. Music. Yeah. Music is in the air in many ways. Travels.

It traveled, the waves. You said sky, yeah. I understand where I went wrong now because I thought about sky and it was like planes. Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Oh, someone was going to pick it. Well, yeah, someone will pick it. It's going to happen. Someone will Wilson pick it.

Music. Wilson Phillips. Wilson Phillips. Also Wilson, you know. John Phillips Souza. The flugel horn. He's in. I play the Glog.

Personally, I play the Glog. And I like to drink Gord. The Gloggin' spiel. What's the Rikola horn that? What are those called? I don't know. That big long guys that are on the ground. Rikola horn.

It's the yodel. Alporn. Okay, cool. Alporn. That's in the air, because they play it so it can be heard from long distances. It is Swiss or something? And the horn of Gondor, you can hear that from really, far away. For real. If you were taking the horn of Gondor, dude, you wouldn't be getting any blowback.

It's not in the air. Music is in the air. I hate this. Now, when you think of music in the air, what do you, what, like, is there a specific song? No, it's more like a feeling. Like, you know, like when you say there's music in the air, when you hear the expression. Timberlake, trolls, World Tour vibes. Yeah, Funch is there. Funches is there. Yeah. You're walking around Staten Island listening to Method. It's like the expression there's music in the air. It's like romantic. So I take it to mean.

A feeling. Yes. Yeah. Well, you have a little music in your air right now. Oh, yeah. Yeah, he has a paramour. I'm not talking about Haley Williams solo project. You know a lot of stuff.

Yeah. You got a lot of knowledge in there. This is just like a Google search of clicking on links in his brain. And it just keeps going on. You know a lot of stuff. This started with a Zillow like, what's my neighbor's house going for? And then you're like, what is a, What is a Pieditare?

Oh, Amy Poehler has a Pied tear. Parks and Rec. Whatever happened to the fat guy, Jerry? We remember the Rex and a effect. Oh, he has deep vein thrombosis. Thrombosis sounds like trombone. Yeah. And you keep going from there.

High-wending. Trombone play. We went through, Max and I went through a paramour phase on the way to swimming lessons for the summer. Oh. It's like every time back and forth. Swimmer is your business. Paramore and Samarmore Jason Bands. Yeah.

Game up on Spotify. Jason Bands? Paramore Jason Bansman. Jason Bansman. Batesman. I can't think of that other. Anyway, keep going. Music is in the air.

Yeah. For my first pick, I'm going to take something that is more literally in the air. I'm going to take the bird that can stay in the air for the longest. And hopefully I'm right, because I just looked it up. Not just, but I looked it up, whereas you are an expert. The common swift is a bird that can stay in the air for months at a time. Months and months of the time. It doesn't have to land.

I didn't know that. Doesn't seem too common. This bird poops? Yes. Scott Randy. I've been running that for like two weeks. The common Swift holds the record for the longest uninterrupted flight staying airborne for up to 10 months. Wow.

Eating, sleeping, and even mating in the air, and it only lands to nest. It nests in Portland, the Swift's comeback. But it can just stay in the air for a long time. And I figured if it's in the air, we're drafting things in the air. Yeah. The common swift just up there. Wow. Stay in airborne.

How do they get the food? They just eat bugs. I suppose. So they're not like crazy high. Sometimes they'll get close to the ground for the bugs. Closer to the ground for the bugs. Why? Bugs can go pretty high in the air.

You would think they'd be like, there's the ground. Right. It's been months. It's just going to take a break. I would imagine it's a survival instinct of some kind of like for them just to stay airborne. They just don't need it. They just don't need it. You know what I mean?

Like it's, They're just cool without it. They're built different. They're built different. Yeah. Oh, they are him. They are him. There are some other birds.

I don't want to draft shows in case anyone else says that stay in the air for a very long time. Some of them are massive. But the Swift is the one that stays up there the longest. I didn't know that. Yeah. That's rad. The common Swift. That's really cool.

Yeah. It's opposed to the Taylor Swift. I've been trying to think of a joke. She stays on tour for a long time. She stays on tour. for a long time. She's on the road. And she was on the heiress tour. Yeah. Some

Swifts want to shake, shake, shake. These ones flap, flap, flap. Now this owner fraud's starting to make a little sense. Now that we're cracking the egg open. Oh, the egg. Swift egg. Common.

Come on. I'm going to eat some lunch after this. Yeah. I'm getting loopy. Yeah, that's cool. It's cool that a small creature that isn't exciting really if you're just looking at a swift it's just a bird it would never occur to you yeah does something epic you don't think about it months at a time it stays up there yeah

and they they're like when they fly together what is this called when birds like seem to like all be thinking at the same time yeah I don't know the tour yeah I don't know the it's amazing I saw it I was walking through Dowsy and there were all these like crows or blackbirds I know there but there were like hundreds of them they all yeah it was a marvels that twist and twirl yeah yeah it seemed to have like one mind It's fluidity in nature. It's pretty crazy. Yeah, and they don't run into each other.

It's called murmuration. Mirmation. That's it. That's right. Mirmation. And then you're like, just looking that's happening above a traffic jam you're in. Right. And you're like, so we can't figure it out?

We got all this. Yeah. This thing I'm in doesn't even exist. Like someone had to think of it. Walk through an airport without slamming into each other. It's really difficult for me to get a mobile order at a Starbucks. Just that happened by the fucking Swiss. So the Common Swift is my first pick.

My second pick is going to be the Goodyear Blimp. Yeah. Yeah. Living in L.A., always fun to see the Good Year Blum floating around. It's just cool because it's from the Ice Cube song. Yeah, it was a good year. It was a good blimp. It was a good blimp.

It's a good thing. What did it say Ice Cube was on the blimp? And it was a good day. Today was a good day. Yeah. And it said Ice Cube. I didn't have to get out my AK. God damn right.

I was really close to the lyric guy. Use it. She didn't have to get, well, you don't have to use it. Use it, get it out. You'd have to get it out to use it. Yeah, he would. Unless everybody's like rearranging his closet.

Yeah, yeah. Let me ask everyone this. And before, how many blimps do you think there are in the world? I just looked it up recently. God damn it. That exists? Did you look that up?

No. Are you serious? Very recently. I saw it on Instagram or something. Really? Yeah, yeah, yeah. There's 25? Yeah.

Were we talking about this recently? I sent you a meme. about it because it like came up it was like on the um pubidity or whatever it's a really gross website i go on sometimes it was on what which is worse pubity puberty oh yeah that's it's so much more oh did you send this to the uh i sent it to the candy-coded oh yeah yeah yeah but yeah right is it 25 on the dot it is 25 on the dot i thought that was going to be a lot more interesting but i think it's probably because i blew it up though i just looked it up yeah i thought you just nailed it no no oh anyway how many blooms do you think they're on the

I don't know. You can't say 25. 70. Wrong. What? You idiot. We would know if there were 70 blimps in the air. You're off the podcast, Laura.

How many planes do you think? You're off the air. How many planes do you think there are in the air at any given time in the world? Do you know the answer to this? Rough. Like, it's way more than I thought it was going to be. I don't know the answer. No, I know.

25. 20. No. I'm going to say. 12,000. Yeah, it's, we look it up. We look it up, please. I'm on it.

Oh, you're on it? Uh-huh. Yeah, it's something crazy that there's always X amount of planes in the air, like in the, on the planet at any given time. Jesus Christ. Is that like 80,000 or something? Between 15 and 20,000 at a time. Isn't that fuck, dude? Yeah, I mean, that makes sense.

I was flying in and there was, like, weather last week in New York and the, like, weather every day. Yeah. weather happening right now Morris you're so nice and patient yeah yeah put them on all right

you look like the other person from Sean's snowboarding commercial I passed on that no I didn't they never offer me that kind of thing I'm not as likable as John I was like I could see like 12 planes right just circling when I was flying, I was like, and I saw that

I was like, no wonder these guys are stressed the fuck out out all the guy, like these air traffic controllers. Yeah, yeah, and you could had somebody taken over the airport. No, it wasn't a diehardt situation, die hard two situation. But I was just like, it's insane. And you could see the distance between them and height and stuff, but it was like, it was terrifying to look at it.

It was just like a squadron. It was horrifying. Laura's dad, pilot. Mm-hmm. Yeah. The end. Goodyear made airships for the Navy first. Well, we went to Tillamook here in Oregon

and they have a giant, giant hangar there that used to house blimp that we used for surveillance. There's still one inflated, right? Didn't we see one blown up or whatever the term is? Well, there's only 25. That's active blimps. But the hangar was huge.

Hangers are massive. Active blimpies also only 25. Maybe the worst sandwiching. history of mankind. You ever been to Blimpys? I don't know if I have. It sucks. Does it?

I don't know. It's really bad. It's like a subway that doesn't give a damn. And that's already saying, Subway barely gives it. Yeah, that's what my point. Yeah. I'll tell you this about Laura, big subway fan. Yeah.

Well, why wouldn't you be? No, I'm just saying, like, it's, whatever we're on the road or whatever, Subway is like the go-to. What's your go-to at Subway? The chicken terriaki with veggies. Yeah. I was a spicy Italian man when I was going on. Nice. Yeah.

Meatball. I like the meatball too. The meatball is like it does. It puts you down, though. It's a whole thing. Yeah, I haven't had one in 20 years. Get off me. I haven't had one in 20 years.

20 minutes. If anybody else is out there and I'm not going to hear any further discussion on it, but if anyone else out there was a seafood and crabhead, hit me up in the comments. Sure. That's insane. Hit me up. I said no more conversation.

Some log all over it I'll meet you for a glog Had too much subway I got glog in my Foot If you could get a subway employee to be like And would you like milk on yourself I would you like milk? Would you like subnog?

In Ireland they can't call their bread bread In some way because the sugar content's too high They make them call it pastries Oh big unconscious Ireland They are Big They call the Jamison water And what do they call a beer?

Well, they call it Fun. Yeah. They don't call it anything but right before they call it some goddamn peace and quiet. Split a fucking potato

and half and put a meatball on it. Oh, yeah. It's fun to make fun of the Irish. It is. It is. Oh, we've never been through anything. Here comes the number. He's going to say it.

Oh, you're so well-behaved. Well-behaved? She is. Like, we're assholes. I'm not an asshole. I'm a delight. Jane, time for your second pick Say something

That doesn't pertain to what Laura picked Well, I haven't to see if this gets allowed But it was in the sky I actually thought of one It's got apple juice on his chin You look so much like Artie right now I don't know if this counts now But Chinese spy balloon

because it's not technically in the sky yet showed up I mean it was in the air for a while Yeah so I don't know if we're counting it A fly balloon is different than a blimp Yeah absolutely this is better than your last pick Yeah much better this is something in the sky You don't have to be Farrell to see this one

See that's I can be pretty funny We're just we're like laughing because your wife's here and we don't want to embarrass you what's funny is his big hat Perel's big hat you remember that thing oh yeah yeah yeah that big happy Rby's that's hat oh no I'm thinking the wrong one no you're thinking the right one but it was like not high enough to be a super joke like a cartoon character was just like three times higher than a normal hat it's like up to here a weird move are you referring specifically to the 2023 Chinese balloon incident.

Yes. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. They all forgot about it out of the sky. I felt like that news story didn't get enough out of it. Yeah.

Biden covered it up. I do remember thinking, when was Trump elected again? 2024. Yeah. I do remember thinking like the news coverage on it was just like Biden's Chinese spy balloon was like such a Fox News kind of. Yeah.

They were just so ready to blow him up on that. Um, oh. When did we learn about it? Had it already been? taken down or was it one of those things? No, it was in the air. We don't know what it is. It was civilian reports

were like what made it news public. That's right. There's this balloon. Yeah, and people didn't know what it was, but they could see it. Yeah. And it's exciting. Yeah.

And then I think they blew it out of the sky with like F-16s or something. Yeah. Yeah. And then what was the response from China? They were just like, oh. We were having a birthday party and it got away. It is ours and we lost it off.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. They said, if you want paying. Pandas, you're going to have to deal with some occasional balloons, you know. They're no longer endangered. Pandas? Yeah. Toss something on pubicare or whatever that website is that I go to about it. Puberity.

Pubidity. Right? Pubidity is way worse, Shane. Oh, now they're vulnerable. Pube's icky. Better. Vulnerable. Vulnerable.

Kind of a Shane. Like Shane. Yeah. Got him. I knew either going to say it. I said it instead. A high five. I just got out of it.

Yeah, somebody I knew they were gonna Somebody puts it down You gotta pick it up I get I love it I knew it was so You did good

You did good You did good See someone's vulnerable Is it mean No it's great Yeah It's good See what you're vulnerable

Saying he stinks And you don't like Sitting next to it That's mean He smells And looks like an open sewer That's mean Why he said it

I'm just looking around the room I'm saying that would be mean I'm saying you're not saying you're missing it And if it were true it would be rude to do This is coming from the same guy As he picked me up There was a dog sitting on the street He goes oh

Okay hit the comments if that's not funny All right if I'm wrong First of all smash like and subscribe Yeah Chinese Spiveolin Yeah that was an exciting time Yeah Did they say there was did we find anything out

about it once they got it or they just not really let's ask my dad my piece of one who know I guess yeah yeah he'd have some information for us yeah it's a big ball it was a big ass balloon yeah damn it's like it's like how high it was it's almost the size of the statue of liberty here really big ass balloon yeah thought it was like the size of a chair I didn't know estimated payload of 2,000 pounds I'll say this statue of liberty you ever seen it in person yes it's not as big as you think it was no kind of Because you can climb it. Is that what you're saying?

What did you say? I'm so happy. I thought he was about to say like kind of a butterface. Like, do you say, have you seen, have you seen the Statue Liberty up close? But I'm sorry, that's it. We call that a, we call that a hundred yarder. In poor taste. These are jokes in poor taste.

Yeah. But I smell and look like an open sewer. I didn't say. You smelled like an open sewer. You said it's a one. I'm not usually this full of piss and vinegar war Last night just like I hope you guys don't go too hard on each other I'm like I don't

This is actually fairly kid gloves I don't think we really did learn that much It happened to I mean it's such a big article You know I bet would know The general Let's get him on the horn Pick up that red phone One of my dad's because he was

in charge of reconnaissance, surveillance, and intelligence for the Air Force at one point. He would never tell us anything. We didn't really ask that much. But whenever we did just ask things as a joke or whatever, his response would be, I can either confirm nor deny the presence of nuclear weapons at this time. And he would just say that. And he would just say that. I can either confirm nor deny the presence of nuclear weapons at this time. Really? Yeah. Whatever it was. That's very funny. Dad, you've been to Area 51. What's in there? Or are there aliens there? And then he would just say that. Hey, Dad, can we go see the new avatar? Yeah, I can either confirm.

Dad, would you get me for Christmas? I can either confirm or not. Yeah. Yeah. Sean Jordan, it's time for the next stop on your toddler parade. You have exploding fireworks. And aliens. That was going to be the next stop on a little kid trade.

Aliens, they're up there somewhere. They're there. They got to be. Your dad knows about him. Get them on the horn. That's a great thick. Yeah. I don't know my list.

Yeah. No? No, you don't believe in them? I mean, we can't, like, I need to see it. You see a lot of them in New York, don't you? Illegal aliens. They're not called UFOs anymore. What are they called UV?

UTIs. Pumidies. Puberty's. I didn't know they weren't called UFOs. Oh, U.F. There's, like, another word they like to use now. Is it like... The people in the Mark Hoffest community, or is it the other guy?

It's the other guy. It's the other guy. It's the Tom DeLong. Tom DeLong. It's the one who's very into the... aliens and like funds research for him. Michaeline Black is super into it too.

Also kind of looks like Tom DeLong. And you're telling me that these machines accurately count the votes. I just, I'm not buying it. Also, jet fuel can't melt steel beams. And I'm just saying. I mean, it's a real DeLong shot. UAP. Unidentified, anomalous phenomena.

Something like a phenomenon. UAP. I think that's to cover submerged objects as well. Is that right? I think so. Who cares about an underwater flying object? It's not in the sky.

Not for today's discussion. Aliens. Yeah, aliens. I bet they rule. What level do you believe? Do you believe? I think about it way more than I want to. Especially getting older, just the vastness in the infinite universe.

It just gives me a headache. Do you believe in life after love? Isaac, we throw an auto tune on that? I have to love, after love, after love, after love. I can feel something inside me saying I really don't think it's strong enough. Do we get flagged for that?

Or can we just sing, share. We're allowed to sing it. I think we'll get flagged for being terrific. We might have to add a terrific, yeah. Try it's signed, dude. I get flagged by Geffen. If not. If not.

Yeah. Clive listens. Clive Davis. He'll hear it. He listens. Yeah. What level do you believe they've made contact with us? Do you believe they've come to Earth?

I think, I'm going to sound like a nut job. You don't even know this about me? He tried to work this into the valves. You smoked me on the vows, by the way. Boy, oh, boy. Those were very sweet, but she just absolutely went off. Yeah. It's like Michael Jordan fucking flu game.

You went off, Queen. Crazy. What's that, a free bag of Cheetos? Was that in the vows? Yeah. I'm not at all prepared. That's what you really have printed out over there. Right, my vows.

Just sort of run these back. It was like, oh, I get free Doritos with my sandwich. Oh, that's what it was. Or something. Yeah, things that you're grateful for. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Like, oh, this mall has an outdoor escalator dope. That is dope. The town center's got an outdoor escalator. I know. We talked about it. Which one does? The Clackamas Town Center. Yeah, I think there's probably aliens that have been here.

Come to Earth, yeah. I don't know. It sound like a lunatic saying that. It has to have happened. Earth has been here for like, what, 60 billion years or something? Unless you read Shane's Bible and then it's been here for just over 4,000. I think it's your girl. old Christy Nome's Bible has all these aliens.

I'd thank you to stop talking about my girl. Yeah. Hard for Texas to take a shot across the bow at South Dakota. Yeah, we will. Yeah, I bet. Maybe on accident, who knows? Maybe we're the smartest thing in the whole universe. That would be nuts.

Something has to be. It would be a bummer. That would be gnarly. Jake Paul's one of the smartest things. You don't like, Jake Paul is the smartest. That's the smartest guy on Earth, the trickle of him. He'll tell you that.

He's rich for nothing. Well, he got his jaw busted, so I guess that sucks. Anyway, aliens. Laura, come for your second and third picks. Oh, your second pick already. Oh, great. Okay, this is exciting. Serpenti draft.

Great. Well, since you were talking about my dad, and we've mentioned already that he's pilot, I'll just go ahead and say military planes. I like seeing military planes in the sky. Obviously, we're not in a war, so it's okay. But I like it. I like hearing.

I like when fighter jets go over. Oh, yeah. I like the sound of it. Something like that. That's pretty good. Thank you very much. I didn't know you could do. That wasn't me.

If anyone was listening, that was Shane. I don't want that on my record. Shane moved. They call me a fly boy for no reason. Because you were the only guy who danced in a living color. A lot of people don't know that. I have a lot of fun hats too. like Rosie Perez.

Yeah. Because like the bait, you grew up on the base, and so it's like a nostalgic feeling. Sometimes, yeah, we live on a base or near a base, so it is nostalgic. I grew up around jets flying over all the time and landing or my, or my dad flew a KC-135 and reconnaissance planes. So the air-fueling planes too. Military planes. I see him and I think, yeah, good.

Oh, you're one of those? Go practice. Yeah, I'm like, yeah, you're out there practicing, you're training. Your dad flew the plane where the little hose comes out of the back of it. That was his main thing is the air refueling pilot. Whoa. The guys who are in the air refueling. hovering and are so accurate they can make the little thing you come out and get into

another plane and give them fuel in mid-air. I used to have an off-color stand-up drive. It sounds like you would. Everything about that screams that any of you would have a joke about that. Oh, I know. I know. That's why I said the long thing that went into the plane. It was about having sex with a fact guy.

That's all I'll say about it. But I wrote that joke because I was always so fascinated by that footage where I'm like, How in an airplane, do you get those? I don't know. Your dad did that? He did that. Wow. And still raising such an amazing daughter

is his most impressive feat. Yeah, right? But yeah, it's... Nice, right? Sweet. It was really nice. That was amazing. And your mother.

I'll tell you this. I walk in a lot, and this one has Maverick on. Just, that's like the background movie all the time for you. Yeah, I like it. You know what I mean? Like, you got your background movies? Sure. Mine are weird, Mystic River, stuff like that.

You love that movie. You love Mr. River. Yeah. That's weird, right? Spotlight. Yeah. It's dark and sad I can't watch it anymore

I haven't watched it Oh dude I can't no Cannot Anything with a kid even There are a lot of things like We went to It just changes you guys like that Like that kind of stuff you could like

Like watch and it Yeah I mean And I really think scientifically There changes in the brain that happened That now you react to things differently I've said this I think on the podcast before But we went and saw Superman The David Corn Sweat

Superman the summer There's like It's David Corns Sweat? David Corn Sweat is the man who plays Superman now. His name's what? David Corn Sweat. I didn't know that.

Like sweaty corn. Are you serious? David Corrin sweat. Yeah. Corrin? Member of the tribe. Remember. He's from Philadelphia.

He's from Philadelphia and he is a member of the tribe, Jew. Superman is a Jewish guy. Him and Natalie Hirschlock. Natalie Hirschlock, another Jew. Natalie Portman. And Winona Horowitz. And Wynona Horowitz. And Wynonna Horowitz.

Why not? But David Cornswet, believe it or not, birth name, didn't change it to that. That'd be a wild stage name. Going with Corn Sweat. Call me Steve, cool. Because his real last name is Robinson, and there was already,

he didn't want to do a Michael B. Jordan situation. There's a scene with an alien baby, like a baby that looks like an alien. And obviously, it's a Superman movie, so you're like, Superman will save this alien. baby and like my wife I almost started breaking down my wife like she'll gladly tell you this like

had a meltdown it was our first time of the movie since Arthur was born and just this little alien baby being in trouble we were like because it like fucks you up so hard yeah it's wild don't need to like get into the weeds but I don't know if you watch the pit but you're like no I won't do it dog

it anyway yeah I can't watch the pit I have enough like I'm like I have real medical issues I'm not gonna watch a fictionalized version Let me Grey's Anatomy where they fall on a telephone pole or something. Yeah, you can keep that, too. I'll keep it. Keep it all in the house.

So is that tanker your favorite military plane to see or here? I've never seen that. Maybe. Have you seen it happen? You've seen, like, the hose and all that. I haven't seen the air refueling happen, but I, my, we grew up with pictures of KC-135s on the wall in our house. And then my dad, when he came back from Desert Storm, my mom, my brother and I all waited on the runway tarmac at Grissom Air Force Base waiting for my dad to come home. He'd been gone at war for months.

And he flew the plane in. So he flew it in and landed right and, you know, pulled up in front of us and got out. And he was so skinny, I remember, after being at war. So it's like it feels like. Yeah. Also, we held up signs and said, Dad, what did you bring me? He just got on vacation. But, but yeah.

So, like, it's sort of a nostalgic thing, those planes feel right. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. And I like knowing that people are up training and they're practicing. I do like, there's something about the preparation. Yeah, go. The job, you know. Yeah.

Shane and I also had that. He was the way at war, too. War with himself. He was finding a war with the model. In a sense? Yeah. Yes, I get it. I loved the hairier when I was a kid.

The jump check is it could take off like from like a seat to position, you know, like, oh, those are the ones that like go straight up. Yeah. Those are nuts. Oh, yeah. Excellent pick. And your third pick? Well, since you may.

mentioned Maverick. My third pick is a little off the wall, but things in the sky, I'm going to go with Tom Cruise while promoting the Olympics or any other movie. He's involved with. Yeah. Great pick. Thank you. Thank you. I was doing a bit. I saw when he was in Paris and he did the bungee jump. I was like, I had no idea what was going on. And I didn't know the LA Olympics were coming up. I was like, this is just insane. It really was like, if you don't know, like, Because it's just Mike Tarrico goes, what's that? Yeah. And it was Tom Cruise.

He's in the air all the time. And the sky. Yeah. And the whole thing was like, the whole time I was like, like, I was just, like, he's just, and there was that woman shredding in a white dress in the guitar. And I was like, is this a Scientologist wedding? Like, he, and he, like, comes by all this stuff, honestly. Like he, because we shot with him a few times on.

It's very earnest. Like, yeah, yeah, yeah. He is like, he has done enough skydiving. That he, like, he has, like, over a thousand hours skydiving. Amazing. You think about that? That's crazy. That's like if you skydive every day for three years.

Wow. That's nuts. And he, like, really, like, he lives that. Like, he learns how to, he knows how to. He's flying planes. Yes. He's, like, going off of cliffs on motorcycle. Yeah.

In the sky a lot. Yeah. Like, yeah. And he's, like, climbing the birds, Dubai. Yeah, yeah. In the sky. I think Matt heard some interview with Matt Damon where he wanted, he was talking about how Tom Cruise is asking him about a stunt

and he goes how'd you get that done and the stunt coordinator goes like well I was trying to come Tom's like I was trying to get it and the stunt coordinator's like we just can't do it he goes so I just fired him and found a guy who would let me do it there's a little bit there's this story about Dustin Hoffman and Lawrence Olivier

on the set of I forget what movie they were maybe Marathon Man or something like that and like it was Res of War Dogs it was it was it was trolls world tour It was, but Dustin Hoffman was supposed to be playing like, like, strung out, like, you know, like someone who's like paranoid and been strung out for a few days. So because he's a method actor, he like literally stayed up for like three days

and was all like red-eyed, didn't sleep and all this stuff. And Sir Lawrence Olivier, one of the greatest actors of all time. Like, you know, they were in this scene together and he just showed up, you know, having a lovely breakfast and full night's sleep. And he looked at Dustin Hoffman. and was like, why don't you just try acting, my dear? And there's a little bit of that with like Tom Cruise where it's like, you know, you could just like act in movies again.

You don't have to do all this crazy, but he just loves the crazy shit. He's got a movie coming out called Digger that's supposed to be like a dark comedy or something, and I don't think he's doing any crazy shit in that. You know, I wonder, when we were, again, this is, when we were on the set with him, he told us he wanted to do two things again. One was like a musical. We wanted to do another musical. and the other was he wanted to do like a Buster Keaton style comedy.

It looks like that. And I wonder if this digger is like a Buster Keaton style comedy, which is pranks. The trailer doesn't show you much, but it looks goofy. Yeah. Yeah. Wow. Interesting. Yeah.

I mean, he's funny in like in Tropic Thunder when he's the manager or whatever. He's hilarious. Yeah. Yeah. Well, when he's the billionaire that's financing everything. Yeah. Yeah. He's pretty great.

Watch that guy in the face hard. Yeah. Anybody listening, that wasn't Tom Cruise. No, Sean Jordan. That was me. But the Mission Impossible movies are over as far as we know now, right? So it's like... Boy.

With him. Oh, really? With him. I would doubt that he's not in another Mission Impossible movie. Yeah, it's going to happen. He'll die on set. I think if he had his brothers, right? That would be the way to go for him.

Dying on set. Keep it in. Hopefully not in like an expository dialogue seeing that. Yeah, right? Which explodes. You complete... Sean Jordan Exploding fireworks, aliens

Clouds Clouds! Yeah! When you figure out clouds move Holy cow The whole world is different You remember when you're a kid And you're like

It's moving? I thought they were stationed I thought they were like stood still They move You know that? Watch them, dude Depending on the Chinooks or the jet stream Or the nor'easters

They could go quick They could go slow So you remember having a moment where you thought clouds were still? I didn't know they moved. I mean, I don't specifically remember when I figured it out, but I do remember. I know that moment from childhood.

Having the realization, because just it's raining one day or whatever, and you see like the thunderstorm moving. Like, I knew tornadoes moved and stuff, but yeah, just like big fluffy cumulinembus clouds. Cumulinembus. It was laying on the ground, like, during the summer, and they would, like, move on.

I'm a serious man myself. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Which, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, Bowen Brothers movie version of that the non-Cohen Brothers movie from the riff we were doing earlier

The serious man Could be the serious Have you seen Have you seen Grand Forks That other Is that Fargo? Oh there you go See that's a little Dakota

Like insider There's not another A Bismarck we could have said You know you could say Stay Close Fargo Fargo It's better

Farstay Close Yeah it'd be close stay Farstay Yeah it'd be close stay Yeah, I like mine. What was that? What was it again?

I'm not budging on this. I said stay close. Fargo, that's complete cloud. That's a complete inversion. Could be a dinosaur. Yeah. I do like, I did love shape making when it was a kid with the clouds. Yeah.

You big fan of cloud bursting? What is that? Kate Bush. Kate Bush, Cloudbursting, right? I don't know. Is that one of her songs? Yeah, clubbers. Is that the running up that hill song?

Because that's the one that I know. Cloudbusting. Cloudbusting. That sounds gross. Who are you going to call? Kate Bush. Bannie, Bannie

Bannie Bannie Bann and be like Bauda Bha Bha Bha Bha Bha Bha Bha Yeah

Clouds brother Great man It's a great pick I love them too This is fun Yeah This is a good time

Can move and change Your third pick I lost my list I don't think it was A list anyways That counted I had a list Brick

What you see if I can find it I don't know What that's the most apps I've ever seen Oh here we go Okay You're getting a phone call No no I'm

I'm done Oh I'm better When Sean said that's the most apps I've ever seen Shane's DoorDash driver Shown With 250 Mozilla sticks The driver

I've never seen a driver That's scared I figured He just says he walks in a go, I figured there'd be more people here. Nope. Just got like an arm full of loose wings. This gets worse and worse.

Farts. That counts, dude. I don't know how high up in the sky. Yours are going, but they're in the sky. Disciate? I had way well for interest for breakfast. Don't judge. You've never made a far joke.

I see you're about it. I've never made a fart joke. Never. I farted. Who hasn't? It's an escapable condition of being alive. I would never joke about it. I want this to be real, but I saw...

I write poems. I create art about farting. You're full of gas, I'll tell you that. I keep talking about this Instagram site, but pubity or whatever. I saw people in a record store, and it was like, this is what it looks like when people farted.

I'm wondering if that's real. I wanted to be. I didn't dig. It was just showed fart clouds coming out of people at record. With an infrared camera, but I'm like, I don't know. I want to look that up.

It seems like it's not real. Well, you wouldn't fart in a record store anymore because you're purest. People don't fart in record store. Yeah. People engage. When you're talking about jazz, all I do hear is. Yeah. Yeah.

If you're listening to like, I don't know. Ornette Coleman. Ornette Coleman. Yeah. For God's sake. Louis Armstrong. Bill DeWine. Louis Armstrong.

Ella Farts Gerald. Well, congratulations on your first fart joke. You did one. I felt good. Oh, my God. It felt good. Stinker, Taylor, Soldier's story, whatever. Stinker Taylor's, Soldier, Spy?

What's that going to do with jazz? Stinker Taylor Soldier Spy. Stinker Taylor Johnson? Yeah. Just a fart joke. Just a fart joke? They're in the air. Farts are in the air.

Is that what you said after the squirrel got snatched up? You know, farts are in the sky. You're dating someone new. Have you farted near her yet? No. Yeah. When do you anticipate that happened? When I want to break up.

I don't knew it. Laura said I farted my sleep game the night and I almost barfed. She said, just blew my mind. We were laying in bed. The right thing to be blowing at this phase. I was in a hotel in Cincinnati when she said it, by the way. That was a fart joke, not a fallatio joke, just for the record. I'm very interested in what you're saying.

Can you continue? She said something you thought was very interesting. Yeah, well, like, we were laying in bed and I was asleep and she goes, well, like, last night I was just watching you sleep for a little bit. And I was like, and I just, in my head, I was like, that couldn't have been fun. Like, I just like, there's just no way of me just being like, man. Was this the beginning of a conversation about sleep after you? Actually, no.

I go, was I snoring? And she goes, not at all. Like, no. Yeah. Shocker for both of you, I see. No. Do you have a mask? Do you do a mask?

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. I don't even think I have sleep apnea anymore, but just to be safe. I have a guard. I do a mouth guard. Yeah. I sleep with a gun. Is that true? Or is he joking?

He's joking. Okay. Yeah. I'm kidding. You're beautiful. Thank you. Thank you. Now, that was serious.

Well, it seems like she might like you if she watches you sleep. Yeah. You watch me sleep? When you're not upset? I'm usually going to sleep first. So no. Let's just sit in this. Let's just sit in the silence and think about it.

I watch you sleep. I do. All right. I come over. I don't ever watch you sleep. I have a treadmill in your room. I wear rollerblades and I'm a treadmill. You wear rollerblades so you stand still?

I send Laura a text. I say, tonight I'm going to run silent, run deep. She goes like crashes on the couch And then I just stand there The only thing The only thing that could wake him up Is the zip tie on the roller plate So you pull it

FI'm Got to stay ankle support is more more than ever Oh, this looks so stupid Farts are in the air Time for my third My fourth picks With my third

With my third pick I'm going to take Chem trails Oh Kemp trails Dude I grew up with is losing his mind on Facebook about chemtrails.

Really? Oh, God. Do you see all the stuff where people are like, well, they were around when I was a kid? Yeah, they were. Yes, they absolutely were. They were. You're dumb.

Because they were. Yeah, that's what I go. Plains were around. They had jet engines. What's the theory behind chem trails? They're like, they're putting chemicals in the air and it's sprinkling down on us. As someone's eating Taco Bell,

they're just like, you know how bad for you that shit is? No offense if you're into chem trails. We all got to keep ourselves busy. but like you know I also like seeing them in the air I think it's fun along the lines of clouds and stuff where it's like oh a plane was there a while ago

it's pretty fun it is fun move like clouds huh planes planes yeah they're bad for you clouds do you remember the first time you realize planes move I was on a flight one time where the woman next me called the flight attendant over and we were fully in like 36,000 feet

cruising altitude had been going for a long time And she asked the flight attendant, she's like, why aren't we moving? And the flight attendant said, what? She was looking at the woman, was looking at them, just like, why aren't we moving? And the woman said, we are moving, about 500 miles an hour. Let me make sure your pupils are the same size. She was so confused. Yeah.

I was like, if you're up high enough, I guess, I'm like, it's all farm ground. It doesn't look like you're moving, but then you're like, even if you don't understand aerodynamics, there's just like something. Unless Thanos is. they're, like, freezing the plane, you'd be falling, you know? Yeah, if we weren't moving, we would fall out of the sky. Orbane. Probably more Thanos.

Yeah. Oh, they don't expect to find one of us in the wreckage, brother. The fire rises. Yeah. I was on a, when I was flying to L.A. last, we were up way high and we were starting to come down, and I could see. We were way high. Like, higher than you've ever been.

And this is how, like, you know when you're like, I'm an idiot, like, truly stupid? I was looking at like a big tanker ship in the middle of the ocean and I put my fingers on the window and I did this To make it bigger Wow I was like really oh wait like a phone

Yeah I thought you were going to make a tanker bigger Yeah I was going to zoom in I would love to make fun to you for that But I did it with a paper last night Where I was like I went in and I was like Oh no no no no I like try like Will you tell that

about the guy you saw on the plane that was zooming in on different pictures. Yeah, I mean, it happened. I was on my way to Dickinson, North Dakota. My grandma lived there, and I was on the way, I must have been on the way of visitor. That's where you're from, right? Stop. And, yeah, and Dickinson, North Dakota, there were a lot of guys on the plane because there's a lot, there was a lot of oil workers and various, there was a type. North Dakota.

On that plane specifically. Wasn't the cosmopolitan crowd. Anyway, we were in the air and there was a guy on the aisle. I was on the aisle. He was two rows ahead of me on the other aisle. He had his phone out, you know, fully able to see it. And he was going through his photos that he looked like he'd screenshoted of women from some sort of, you know, dating site. And he was zooming in, pinch zooming in on their boobs and then pinch zooming back out.

They were all in quotes because they were just pictures of women that he was zooming in and he would look at him and he zoomed back out. And it was so brazen. And I was like, well, all right, that guy. Just really over and over. I was on a flight and this woman was watching where the crawledad sing. Different. Like right? No, no, it's not.

But she kept rewinding the sex scene on the scene. Oh, really? Yeah. Oh, in a flight? Yeah. And I was just like. Get those out of the airplane. If I'm watching a movie and I was just like, it's also like, it's where the crawl dad sing.

It's not like pornograph. Who's the sex scene featuring? I don't know. I don't know. But I knew it was a, it was, um, I don't know why. I guess because I had looked at, I was looking through the movies too and I was like seeing the same actresses on that. Yeah. Yeah.

That's crazy. Yeah, it was nuts. I hate when they're like, middle seat. Middle seat. I'm not much of a prude, but I'm like, when anytime anyone on like a back of a head rest, is like watching a sex scene at all, I'm like, insane. Hey, man.

You know, there are like kids on this plane. They used to cut them out. Now they just had a little message that says, hey, think about who's around you before you choose this, because I don't know. I haven't ever read that. How about you guys? How about you guys think about who's around on the plane? Yeah.

Fortune 500 company Delta. Yeah. I mean, that's like a huge, like, tenet of their practice. Like, that's why they don't have like assigned baggage space. Yeah. It's because they don't have to solve that problem. Right. If they don't, like, so it's the same thing with the-

on an airplane to solve a problem? It was the same thing with the movies. Like, they're not taking responsibility for it. So it's like, it's on you if you put your bag up there. It's on you if you watch the sex scene in the movie that we have provided. Like there's no, it's insane. I've had fucking $30,000. Like two or three times?

How many times do you think she rewatched it? It was enough. But she had taken notes. Yeah. She's like, oh, that's weird. Taking photos. He stood up in the nose. There is like an innocent explanation.

She's like a, like, a, like a. She's a D.P. She's a D.P. I got to go film. It was at least three or four. Yeah. It was enough. That's a good example, though.

Titanic, they still got that nude scene on a plane. And you're like, I can't, I don't, you know. I watch it. I turn the screen up. It's like, I don't want other people to watch it. You turn the screen up? I do this. You mean the brightness?

Like, you turn the brightness up. Oh, so everyone can say it. Oh, I thought you were saying you were changing the angle so people can't see it. Or you just blast it out so much. Yeah. I've got a way to wire. to get people's attention. You hold up a bunch of mirrors.

I go like this. I do like this. I do like this. I find the closest dickhead. What's up, bro? You see what watching? Don't I look like I would do this? Jay Winslet, dude,

mirror beast town gets them out in this one. Yeah. Dumbs him out on the boat. It's some out. It's some out. pick. But before I do that, we're going to take a short break. This episode of All Fantasy Everything is brought to by 1,800 contacts. Your boy uses it. I've been in that panic so many times where I have like one pair of contacts left or I got

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A podcast. Already in progress. Already in progress. What? Were you going to talk? No, you were going to talk. I know. I was going to cut you off.

I was going to do that. Oh, we're going to do sometimes. Okay, my bad. Time for. my fourth pick? Not going to do that. You're not going to do it with that? I'm going to take a sandstorm, dude. Oh.

Yeah. Like the song? That's part of it. Whoa. No, that's already been picked. Oh, that's music in the air. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. A sandstorm. Have you ever, you never seen one? Never seen anyone. Have you ever seen one? No. You lived in Africa. Did they have sandstorms in Africa? There would be times when it would get dusty, but not like that. Not like a sandstorms.

Africa is like a, a whole continent with different like, uh, yeah. geographical feature where some yeah so that's trying to be a dick what are you trying to be rude it's a smugness in the air but like I think of a sandstorm like engulfing the pyramids of Egypt

like it's coming and you see it coming and you're going to run and you know you can't outrun it kind of a sandstorm yeah that kind of sandstorm you turn and you grab Dana and you shield Artie and you're just diving and under a behind it what either a tank into a cellar maybe that's some kind of cellar so I would have it into a cellar or like

it's just twister with a sandstorm in open sewer he finds away doesn't he just mean finds a way you know you know ham fist something into anything for an insult uh ham fist I think you'll find I won't it's not kosher because of your Judaism yes yes because of your ham's not a member of the tribe maybe I'll get filter fist you can see someone when they get excited when they I'm not hearing you right I saw it pop into your head and you got so excited

the light bulb was on yeah yeah sandstorm they happen right they're like they're real all the time right let's not move on from capabilities too fast they're real they're real things they have like phoenix yeah i think like anywhere near a desert or wherever it can i didn't know that i really didn't i didn't know i thought it had to be like an actual i don't know the sahara or

something like a desert with like rolling dunes or something i thought i didn't know phoenix had enough desert around it for a sandstorm to happen yeah You know what I mean? Yeah, I know what you mean. Yeah. Like, it seems like when you're driving through Arizona, it doesn't feel, it feels like it sucks, but it doesn't feel like a desert like that, you know? Yeah.

But they got him right there, yeah. So they'll, yeah. A little Dust Devils sometimes. Those are cool. They'll call, like, there's a name in Arabic for him, too. Like, Hoosier, like, do. Keep trying. Hoosier's an Indiana man.

That's right. We watch Hoosiers not that long ago. I'd never seen it. Yeah, he had never seen it. Haboob. You're waiting. off. Haboob. I have the H-right. Oh, wow. Yeah. Like that.

The haboob is what that guy on the plane was doing. He was a, yeah, Habo. Habo. Habo. Sandstorm. Ah, boob. That's a terrible. Here's a picture of a haboob in Texas. Not like a boob in Texas, which is the next time you play the Dallas Comedy Club. You oaf. I am a hoboob. Can you flip your laptop around so I can see it? It's like, yeah.

That's in Texas. Yeah. That's in Texas. That's like a wall of sand. That looks crazy. Yeah, wild, right? Riggins would have played right through that. Wouldn't have gotten to him for a second. Probably hammered while he did.

Playmaker would have caught a ball on that. I'll tell you there right now. Sandstorm. Shane, time for your fourth pick. Oh, shit. Yeah. Well, I just kind of already picked this. What have I said so far?

You kind of already picked it? You've said music. Chinese spy balloon and farts. I do. I want to go back and get old draft list. and be like, what do you think we were drafting with these? That would be. That sounds like one of my freestyles.

Any goddamn sense. Like, I would have no idea what that was. No way. Yeah. That sounds like Shane does dirty freestyling in the car. You've told me. It's pretty good. Puberty, puberty, puberty.

Puberty, puberty. Chinese spy balloon. How about you? And we laugh. I'm going to pick George Clooney because he was up in the air in that movie. Oh.

I know you're going to have a problem with this so just so I can get it out. I wrote it down. I love it. Starred Jay Kelly? Jay Kelly? That's what it is. Jay Kelly?

What happened in that movie? Not a lot. Okay. He fired people. J.K. Simmons is J. Kelly? George Clooney's Jay Kelly. Oh, I thought you're talking about that was J.K.' I thought that's what you were saying.

I thought that's one up in the air. Is he not? Jay Kelly's a movie that's out right now starring George Clooney. Gotcha. You see what I, you see what I'm, the connection I made, though. I thought you were saying also starring Jay Kelly, and I thought you were calling J.K. Simmons by his real name.

Oh, no, no, no, no. I do see how you got there. Yeah. I'm thinking of Spite. I wouldn't have gotten there myself, but I'm a Portland State University graduate. I did two years of college. I served two years of college. I think it served the same purpose as graduating.

Didn't come out with the same paperwork. Dishonably discharged. Your wife left an officer and you, You were sent to the clink. I put in my two-year notice that I wasn't going to graduate and they removed me from the premises. Now you paint houses

and fix fridges. Oh, I heard you paint houses. Another movie. So George Clooney. George Clooney up in the air. I like that movie. Anna Kendrick. Yeah.

Anna Kendrick, Vera Farmiga. J.K. Simmons. No. He was in that movie. He gets fired. I'm not having a stroke. Oh, he does. I made that connection.

That's the only way I would have made that. Jason Baitman. The Baitman's in it? Galaphanacus. Galaphanacus. What's the loose plot of that movie? He travels around and fires people. It's my pick.

I'll say it. Shane, what's the loose plot of this movie? Sean ruined it. But I appreciate you asking. It's not your fault. He's him. Would you say that that was an accurate description? Pretty much.

But also, there's another kind of layer to it where George Clinton is a person who's isolated and alone because he travels so much. It's where it got the hooks in, Shane. Oh, no. Not only is he up in the air in his airplane, but also the status of his life, his relationships, those are all up in the air as well. And he gives these speeches at

speaking conferences where he talks about his philosophy of life and how it's made him successful, even though he's not. He lives out of the suitcase. Yeah. He's trying to get a million miles? That's his big goal, 10 million. I almost got a million.

And how does Anna Kendrick play into the learning of this lesson? She is the human element of him. There's an acapella. It's very weird When he fires people, he stands on her Yeah, like It's like an extra eight inches Yeah, yeah, of height

And just let them know And then he meets a woman That he falls in love with And it turns out Don't let's not spoil Up in the air just in case Because that's easily a movie people I haven't seen

Well, and you're going to give one crucial plot elements Oh, well, they're not going to know Yes, but it's not, but it's not. No, no, no. It's my pick. It's my pick. I can do what I want with it.

That's what I think. It's my podcast. I can do what I want with it. Isaac, leaving everything Shane says. I trust him implicitly. He's a brilliant mind. Yeah. They're not going to know that the real issue is that it's a metaphor for George Clinton being an anti-vaxxer.

He's a big time. Wait, what's a Vax? What does that mean? It's what you, like, if you need to send a document. Yeah. Okay. Yeah. But you want to do it fun.

It's not that sugar a call. It's like a phone call for pictures. I thought you were talking. about that sugar water that doctors charge you like $1,000 to put in your veins. You're not talking about that. No, no, no, no. Sobe. The white stuff.

This Snapple fact says you're full of shit. Beef tallow. Here we go. Sean, beef tallow Jordan. It's time for your fourth pick. The apex of a dank roller coaster. Nice. Yeah.

Just the top. You don't love a roller coaster. Right? I don't love them. I'm with you. I can handle them. I can do it. Yeah.

But it's scary. Love them. It doesn't seem like, yeah, I like them, but I don't love it. I can handle, I can do it. This is a fun thing to a lot of people. Just say you don't like it. I wouldn't go on them. Giggle like mad when I'm on there.

Yeah. I do giggle. So maybe I do like it. But if you were like, hey, do you want to go to a roller coaster next door, do you want to ride it? I don't say, no. I'm not mad after I got off. Yeah.

I just am like, oh. It would be very funny to see if you. were. Ah, for Christ's sake. Damn it. Going across the line, that sucked, everyone. We just mocked people. We were at California Adventure and we got in line for a roller coaster that you didn't

know how to loop. And we saw the loop when we were almost up there. And I kind of got deflated and she's like, I'll go still. Yeah. And you did it. Because we went to the front of the line. That's a hard. That would have been hard.

That's an embarrassing walkback. Yeah. That's the high dive walk back too. Yeah. You're a real California. adventure. Try merging on the 405. Nice.

You know what always used to get me is when you'd call it the 405. You'd be like, I'm on the 405 for another hour at least. 101. Have you just said that? 101 first. I told that to someone the other day. Like, I just, what I just said, told him my buddy used to do this bit and they're like, it's not, it's the 405.

Everyone there says it. And I go, that's why it's a bit. You know what I mean? You don't get it at all? It's that ingrained. What if you just say it or not like, oh, I? I was on 1001st Street, and they were just like, where is that? You know, it's the big long road.

It goes up the, it goes up the, it goes up the, or like Mountain Hood, that one's fun. I've been telling your, is this a pooping bathroom thing a lot lately. I'm so sorry. We went to Piddock Mansion yesterday. We visited the gorgeous mansion here in Portland with this history built in 1914. And every time we went in, he'd be like, and this is a bathroom where someone else poops. This is another pooping bathroom. I'd be telling Max, like, listen, they used to poop right here.

Believe it or not. That guy, Piddick, the founder of the Oregonian, I love. It's a poop right here. William Randolph Hearst once pooped in this bathroom. Now he poops all over the Oregonian, I think. Oh, he's dead. He's been dead for years. Yeah, yeah, and that paper's dying, too, sadly.

No, Oregonian rules. Thank you for covering this comedy festival. I'm not rooting against it. I'm just saying it's hard time for print media. Shane Torres. Oh, Christ. Hates. John Kazano

The sports red John Kanzano Well he's not He's not there anymore Yeah Good I'm sorry I just had to text

The Oregonian What's your favorite What's your favorite What we're calling you Have you ever been on Oh they used to have one At Valley Fair called the Vortex And it was one that

It's by Like it's in Minneapolis Sober of Minneapolis But it's strapped in Over the shoulders He sat on one of those But seats And you would fly like Superman

It was sick Now, over the shoulder, boulder holder holder in an underbutt, nut hut. Yeah. The whole time you're like, man, that guy's got a big hand and raising our daughter. When you say butt seat, because to me, it's almost every seat. It's a tiny little like a tentations. Oh, it's like a bike. You mean?

Yeah, the groove for your legs. I remember it being like a bike seat. It was probably bigger, but it wasn't like a full-on. bench rollercoachers. It's like an individual. Every seat's a butt seat. You're right. I know I've come off

a little condescending a couple times during this podcast. I didn't mean to. Pretentious even. That's my word. We talked about it at the coffee shop. We said I get to use it a bunch today. We divvy up words before the first. We decide what big long word I get to use.

The real draft happens before the podcast. Laura, time for your fourth and then your final picks. Yeah, was we near the end. Good. Well, I'm just going to go happy, and I'm going to say a double rainbow. Oh, no. Yeah. Yeah, I do love that.

I've only seen that a couple times, but it's amazing and epic. I've got one under my belt, I think. That's it, a double rainbow. But I think it was here in the Pacific Northwest. Yeah. So I've claimed this, and I think I was wrong. I think I said that rainbows are exclusively, like, all in the sky. Because if you see, like, an aerial shot of a rainbow, sometimes it's a big circle.

Yeah. That's why you could ever see. But then I think there are rainbows. that start and stop on the ground, right? Well, it is just refracted light, so yes. Okay, so it can be both of those, right? Yeah. Because I think I made a pretty bold statement saying that airplanes were, or rainbows were

only in the sky, there's circles. I understand. I have not seen one from this. Yeah, like, is that always true, though? That's what I'm wondering. Can you taste the rainbow, or is that just a slogan? Skittles are the best. Skittles are good.

I really do like Skittles. I like a smashed skittles. Huh? I don't mind if it smashed. It's fun to see. All I'm going to do is take my smashers and smash it anyways. I don't know if it's pretty smashed. There's a lot of other interesting stuff about us.

That's just one. Color of the rainbow. I'm going to say indigo. I just learned that Roy G. Biv is all the rainbow colors. Didn't know that. What? He did have that realization. We were reading a book about rainbows with Max.

Three months ago. Red, orange, yellow, blue, indigo, violet. You didn't know until just now. I didn't like that too. Like a flying leap to catch. I wasn't judging. I was I was baffled. I don't know.

I was like, who's Roy G. Biff? He lived in Pannock Mansion. Yeah, he's some gaybie. Yeah. He pooped in a bathroom there. The first roller coaster I ever went on was called the Judge Roy scream.

What? Yeah, yeah. And it was a Texas roller coaster. It was named after a guy named Judge Roy Bean. Yeah. Like, you know, six flags over Texas. Yeah. And I swear to God.

it broke down at the top of the first hill. Oh, no. And there was a guy screaming who thought it was hilarious to be like, we're all going to die. Yeah. We're all going to die. Didn't get on one for a while. Yeah.

Yeah. That was the name of the roller coaster? Yeah, Judge Roy scream, hence Judge Roy Bean. Nice. He was like a cowboy, right? Judge Roy Bean or something? Yeah, he was real like, one of the things he was famous for was like, there would be laws where like you couldn't carry a gun in town.

Yeah. And if you got caught, like, and he'd be like, well, the man was walking through town. So he wasn't like, yeah. like he was very like loose interpretation like a foxy way of interpreting the law yeah yeah and i think like at one point no that's ma and paul ferguson that's different we'll get that's another we'll get into that he called himself the only law west of the pecos wow yeah yeah that's pretty i'm gonna get that tattooed on my neck the only law west of the pecos that would be a wild thing to read on someone's name.

It's just a old English. And, Laura, your final pick. Yeah. Okay. This is one I just wish I could have seen. And it is whale blubber flying through the sky. Oh, God. Great pick. In 1970, in Florence, Oregon, a 45-foot sperm whale dead, washed up on the shore. They didn't know how to get rid of it. So they decided to blow it up with, and I looked this up, 20 cases of dynamite. Wow.

And I watched the news coverage of it. of it. And it's hilarious because everyone's really like, oh, we finally figured out how to get rid of the whale. We're going to blow it up. We figured it out. They're going to make it's going to blow into chunks. And as I said, so the seagulls can eat it is what they said. And then they blew it up. And it's a huge explosion. And then what I like about it is like this, there's this arc as it explodes. And like there's whale blubber going up in the sky. Everyone's like, we did it. And then as it starts to come back down, there's the fear kicks in. Yeah. Yeah. Because suddenly like, Oh, no. Oh, no, no, no. It's all coming back down. And I read that a quarter of a mile away from the whale, a pile of whale blubber crashed and, like, broke through a car. Nobody got hurt.

Volkswagen. Beetle, yeah. So I just wish I could have seen whale blubber going up into the sky and coming down from the sky. I would have been marvelous. Yeah. It's a great. It's one of the best picks. It's so good. And then I wrote down a phrase that the reporter said after the whale blubber hit the car. And he said, however, everyone on the scene was covered with small particles. of dead whale. And he said it seriously. And I was like, that's amazing. So that's me.

Particles of dead whale in the sky. We're very proud of that in Oregon. I know. There's an exploding whale day now or something. Florence is beautiful, by the way, if you guys haven't been. Sand dunes. Have I been? I don't think so.

Gorgeous. Yeah. They have like dune buggies and stuff that you can go out on. You would like that. You would like that. We went somewhere where there's like that sand hill that we ran up. That was on the coast. That was where people were sandboarding?

Yeah, where was that? Somewhere on the coast. Yeah. Anyway, that was a good story. It was. I finally had a good story. So you ran up the hill? Ran up the hill.

You Kate Bushed it. You Kay Bushed it. Sure did. What's your last pick, all right? Please. Yeah. Iron Man. Wow.

He's up there a lot. He is. I wanted to kind of sense. he put the little kid thing in there. Oh, nice. Yeah. It will be fun to read off your entire list. Iron Man's up there.

Yeah. He's up in the air, dude. He's back now in the Marvel universe. He's Dooms Day. Right? Dr. Doom, right? Yeah. Doctor Doom's Day.

Oh, no, Doom's Day is Superman. Sorry. Yeah, right. Victor Von Doom. Yeah. And he's not going to be, they're not going to reference that he was Tony Stark. He's just back playing a completely different character.

And he's just going to be Robert Downey Jr. still. It's not the kind of thing you do when things have been going well. He has to be almost a billionaire from those movies. I'm sure he is. I bet. If not yet after this. It's just interesting.

Is Dr. Doom more of a medical doctor or a PhD? That's a great question. I think a PhD. He's like a physicist. He's like a physicist. Like it's kind of a nickname. Yeah.

I think he's a physicist. And he's like a philanthropist and a bit of a playboy. he's the top 50 under 50 in Manhattan's eligible bachelors I know he like had a piece of shrapnel or no no that was Iron Man that was Iron Man that was stopping his ticker His doctorates in multiple fields physics engineering and computer science But they're from Latvary and institutions So we don't know why he left the one program to go to the other

One of these could be like University of Phoenix online He lost his funding multiple times multiple times So If you're in Latvary I hit us up in the country comments. Shane Torres, your final pick. I got a few good ones left, actually. You should have put those on the list.

Fair moans. Yeah. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Love farts. Love farts. We'll be a little no place where we can smell together. You back up to someone be like, turn around, let's fart.

pheromones, that's when two pharaohs have sex? Hey, Xerxes, get over here. Chank, chank, train, train, train, train, train, train, train, that's pretty good. That's pretty good. Pheromones. It means you're about to do it. Yeah. Pheromones, they be in the air, absolutely.

Yeah. My ex-girlfriend asks me, she goes, can you smell my pheromones? I was like, what? I wouldn't even know if I was. Yeah, you can't. They're like. You don't, you don't smell them, right? You feel them at some part, right?

Right? Is that right? Yeah, I think so. The animals, they have pheromone. This is the one thing you won't Google? There's a spider that can make a pheromone that specifically matches a moth mating pheromone and they will excrete it. And then catch the moth that way.

Can I ask you this? And I'm being completely earnest. This is the kind of shit you talk about on your podcast? No. I was like, because I would come right in. Well, yes. Yes. Yes.

We go through. No, I mean, that's an interesting thing. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You said it like you were so mad about it. I don't know. I got a shit you talk about. No, no, no, no, definitely not. It's whatever you want.

No, we talk about a rollercoasters. We have a lot of things. Farts. There's so many farts on our podcast. We draft farts. No, yeah, we do. We talk about weird. It's usually because there's weird reasons that animals make you happy and usually we get to the weird animal facts and stuff like this.

So, yeah, yeah. That's another fun part of the weird animal facts. Yeah, you get lots of weird animal facts in it. What do we just learn today? Those animals that light up red and ultraviolet, right? What are they called? Yeah, spring hairs. Spring hairs.

shining UV light on them and they're red crazy sick bro what kind of animal are they rodentia they're a mammal they might be they probably are

Rodentia didn't they just get a new club that you're going to do in a month I was reaching I was reaching I was pretty bad it didn't work thank you I appreciate it it's the end of the year

we've got to clear out all these jokes before we start the new ones my final pick here we go I'm going to take particles from Joan of Arc When she was burned to the steak When she went on fire

And she went up in the air And they still are in the air right now Maybe Hey what did you put in that coffee I don't know I'm going to put Joan of Arc Just in the way that like carbon can either be It can't be destroyed completely

So whatever made up Joan of Arc and went into the air I bet it's still kind of up there somehow hit me up in the comments if that's true or not when did she what oh let's guess

When did she meet her demise Let's guess I'll look it up you guys This wits and one No no you guessed too Okay great 1273 No probably later than that

Hold on I was gonna say like a I was gonna go way earlier I'm gonna say I'm gonna change it to 1410 I got it up here I'm gonna go Oh, 1560.

Okay. I'm going to say in between Rockward Files. I'm going to bet a dollar? I don't know. Can I bet a dollar? One dollar over. Yeah. What'd you say?

I'm going to say 1624. Hmm. That's a good year. 1569. What? Ninety-nine years after mine? Okay. Oh, is that one?

1369. We're on year of death. I said 13, 10th. Year of death. Yeah. Price is right rules. Ian takes it was 1431. Oh, so it was lower.

I get all the money from AFE this year. Uh-oh. Sorry, we got a rough talk on the way home. That car is going to be a real big issue. Much bigger issue than I thought. There's only three days left, so I think he's talking next year. Jeune di Arc. Jeunevarque, yeah, up there.

We'll see. I don't know. We'll see if that's true. Hit us up in the comments. Let us know. I don't think there's ever comments on these YouTube videos. No, that's why it's funny. That's hilarious.

Comment. To recap. Oh, Randy, do you have a pick for some things that are up in the air? Things that are up in the air? We have a pretty, we forgot to, last time, we forgot to mention that there is another voice in the studio for people listening. And it's Randy, the producer. Yeah, Randy rules. Yeah.

So you've stayed on this long. Now you know. What's your Instagram? Randall, 1980. Randall Lawrence. What's your? Randall handle. What's the handle?

We can't talk. This is it. We can't put that on YouTube. The whole Randall? Gross. Have you ever called your penis that? The Randall? No.

Yes, the Randall handle. I have not called my penis. That's perfect. Well, start doing it. Well, now you do. I like that you said. Do you have a pick? Because your wife's here.

It would have been a much worse word. I, I, I, UFOs. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. They up there. Laura, you went first. You took Bald Eagle, military planes. Tom Cruise, when he's promoting anything. A double rainbow and whale blubber in Florence, Oregon.

Sean, you went second. You took exploding fireworks, aliens, clouds, Wau Costa, and Iron Man. Shane, you went third. You took music, Chinese by balloons, farts, George Clooney, and Faramonds. I went last. I took the common swift. Goodyear blimp, chemtrails, sandstorms, and Joan of Arc's ashes. Yeah.

This is, oh, God, this is a job. In like a year, go back and I just read these to someone. I go, what do you think we were, it would be such a fun thing to do with the current guest? Yeah. Like, what do you think this list was a draft of from five years ago? We should start doing it. That's like a Patreon thing for you guys. Yeah. If you guys just like, that would be fun.

You're going to read like, hey, we're going to do this new thing where we just read from past drafts. What do you think we were drag? Yeah, what do you think it was? That's really fun. Yeah. It's on. That's my idea. Your idea, I found a way for you to get more subscribers.

I don't figure out a way to do it. Yeah, take my fucking face off that. We don't know how, sorry. I can't do it. I email a picture every day. You know this thing about the Patriot. She's the first one that she's like, why is it his picture? We don't know how it just is.

Sorry. I did ask that question. They said it's there permanently now. Yeah. And then it might start showing up on other patrons. Oh. We were talking the other day about how Phil used to take Shane's laptop and set it his home page to Applebee's. None of us do how to switch it

Except for Phil But he'd open it up He'd be like Why the fuck is it Applebee's? I do it, Phil! We want to hear your picksonness of it All Fantasy Podcast at gmail.com Hit us up on any of our socials.

Shout to everyone on the AFE Patreon where you can see Shane Torres's picture. Shout to everyone on the AFE subreddit The AFC slackety. Shout out to producers Randy and Isaac. Thank you. Shout out to the Randall handle. Shout to St. Sue Carmel.

Shout to Frankie O's. Shout to Sid the dude. Shout to Hajie Beats. It's more important than all of that. Tune again next week to another brand new episode of all fantasy, everything. Say Shaclacquackety. Shacquackety. Yeah.

That was a hate gum podcast.