All Fantasy Everything - Worst Zoo Animals (w/ MANDAL)

Episode Date: October 3, 2024

Recorded in-person at Dude, IDK Studios! Truly one of the most hysterical episodes we've ever done.Subscribe to the Patreon for the full video of this episode!!!Guest:MANDAL (IG @themandalman)Support the show!Join the All Fantasy Everything Patreon for ad-free episodes, mailbags, and video pre-rolls.Advertise on AFE!Advertise on All Fantasy Everything via Gumball.fm.Follow the Good Vibes Gang on social media:Ian Karmel (X @IanKarmel, IG @IanKarmel)Sean Jordan (X @SeanSJordan, IG @SeancougarmelonJordan)David Gborie (IG @Coolguyjokes87)Isaac K. Lee (X @IsaacKLee, IG @IsaacKLee)See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

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the worst animals at the zoo. Our host today is the very funny stand-up comedian, Mandel. I'm your host, Ian Carmel. And with me, as always, are my good friends, Sean Jordan and David Bordy. Here we are. We're doing it. Yeah. I still haven't perfected the new...

I can never tell if it's... Welcome! There it is. I said your name right, I feel like I pronounced it like the Jewish bread, Mandel. No, you said it correct. Honestly bro, first I want to say thank y'all for having me on the program. It's our pleasure.

Anytime. But also, it is a made up name. So when people mispronounce how I am, like, you have some ground to stand on, because it's based in nothing. You know what I'm saying? At the same time, you have a unique right to the proper pronunciation.

For sure. I'm an Ian. There's Ians. I think they're wrong. I can't yell them out. Ians is nasty. Ians is insane to be like, actually, it's Ians. Ians feels like wet socks in my ear. I hate it. Well, my favorite is nasty. Yeah, I am is insane to be like actually it's iron iron feels like wet socks in my ear I hate it. Well, my favorite thing is when people's a lot of times people say

Mandel yeah, I was saying it all night last night because they trying to get some semblance of logic and what's happening Makes it and I'm like no no no I was in drugs. I was in drugs. And I'm like, no, no, no. I'm a sociopath. Yeah. It's actually for meaning in a world of fear. Yeah.

And they can't, that's not, you're not. And it's like, nah, it's just stupid, bro. They can't come to you for that. Wait, break down the acronym. Man Against Negativity, Distributing All Love. But I made it up after the fact, though. Yeah. Yeah.

I made it up after the fact. The fact that that wasn't how this started. No, you just thought the word mandel I made I was mandel three years before I came up with it Yeah, mandel means man sandal Like mandel means man sandal the barbecue sandals that an uncle where that's what mandel is and it's that simple. Yep And I understand that as a man in his 30s, it should make more sense than that, but it does not. No, I think you're doing a good job.

It stresses a lot of people out. I'm in my late 30s now, and I definitely have two pairs of mandals. He's in his late 30s for about another week. Don't worry about how long I'm in my late 30s. He actually stands for individuals above negativity. That's all. All right. That's all. That's all.

He's doing the same thing. I'm not above negativity at all. I had myself too scoops of negativity right as we showed up at the studio this morning. Oh, can you tell them about what you can talk about? I'm going to talk about it. Because I pulled up and Ian was in a fight. I was in the middle of an altercation. I walked up and David had the look on his face and I'm like, okay, what's going on?

I didn't, don't do that. No, no, no, no. I was smiling. I had the look on his face and I'm like, okay, what's going on? I didn't don't do that Smiling I had the look on my face. No, you look serious It you were looking at the guy seriously not like you were to do anything But you were it was a serious look and so I knew right away it wasn't an amazing thing happened We're recording at beautiful dude IDK studios in Denver, Colorado sight There'll be a plaque soon of the recording of birth of a Nation available on Patreon. They got one in the bathroom. Okay. You want to be able to be alone with it.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's exactly that. It is crazy before, it is crazy that like being in the space where instead of for recording a podcast that you fit like 80 people in here is crazy. 80's generous. 60? It was, you couldn't fit another person in here. It was, it was about 60. Yeah in here. It was about 60, right?

It was about 60 people? But anyway, we're here. All sold tickets, sold every one. Netflix, get at me. I move units. I'll acknowledge your warning. This is where we come every time we record in Denver. It's the best.

It's beautiful. We love it. It is the best. I pulled up, it's a gorgeous fall day. 69 degrees, crisp. Hilarious. Nipped in the air. I pulled up on it's a gorgeous fall day 69 degrees crisp Hilarious in the air. I got on one of those lime bikes. Oh, yeah, it rode up What do you say this neighborhood is?

Tilting towards gentrification Is that right? It's it's fighting it. It's fighting it. There's a fight. There's a fight Yeah, and I think I ran into someone on the gentrification side of that fight, just based on our interaction. His dogs were tiny. His dogs were tiny. His head was white and bald. He was wearing a Boston College sweatshirt, which I don't think is a local team.

I think if you're 5'8 or under, I do think you should get tiny dogs as a man to increase your stature. That's a good idea. Like little, little dogs. Like the ugly friend kind of thing. That's a great point. Cause I got my dog now at the house is big. You do have a big dog.

I've never felt shorter. That's a big dog on anyone. That bitch huge. Yeah. She leans into you too. She gets in there cause she, yeah, it sucks. Cause she knows she's big. Are you raising it Denver style?

I don't know what that means. You know, poop in the house. Poop in the house? That way. That's Denver style? Denver style. We gotta update our style. Denver style, man. Poop in the house.

Like in a litter box? Nah, man, just wherever you need to go. What? Whose house have you been to? I think you went to the wrong Denver house. Everybody know Google Denver style raisin dogs. That's not it. A Denver style raisin dog seems like something you'd get at a vegan deli here.

For the record my dog poops outside, in the side. Why are you so open arms about it? I feel like you're protesting too much. Denver style is never anything cool. When anybody says Denver style, it's never anything cool. My whole life. It's white basketball players. Denver style. Yeah. It's fucking sad. Oh, they distribute the ball a lot. The Knicks are good, but they kind of need a Denver style guy coming on some events. Listen, I love the Flash. I love guys with handles. I just like Denver-style basketball handles.

Yeah, look at how you can dribble, but does anybody shoot? Maybe somebody went to a good Denver-style college like Creighton. Strong Denver-style parents. Where's the sportsmanship in the game? Still-style parenting. Sk skateboarding in the house. This is crazy. You mean like there's no bad, you mean like people who like kiss their dogs on the mouth and like call them their kid?

No, I'm saying Denver Style is doing outside stuff inside. Okay. That is partially true. That makes sense. I don't see anything on Google except for a delicious looking hot dog. You're on the wrong Google, dude. Yeah, you gotta go to the garbage dump.

And that's the Illuminati. Having a hold on you. Click on the hot dog, see what happens. That guy's gonna come back. Oh, the guy! Finish. So I was parking my, finish. I parked the line bike next to-

Denver style guy walks up. Denver style guy walks up Denver style guy walks up Was mad Denver. I would bet you dollars to doughnuts. The man was not born in Denver Nobody is because he was claiming I live here real hard when we got into it, but um, I parked my bike next to the alley Next to the alley and this is not in the alley. We will take a picture of where I parked the absolutely I'm getting off the bike and I'm not even when this guy comes up and talk to me I have not even situated the bike. Absolutely. I'm getting off the bike, and I'm not even, when this guy comes up and talks to me, I have not even situated the bike.

I'm working on getting the kickstand out from underneath it. And I hear it in the quietest, most passive aggressive voice possible. Like, where I'm like, I don't think this dude's talking to me. Like, did you move the bike? It's kinda in the aisle. Behind me, doesn't come up and look at me in the eyes.

Doesn't speak loudly enough. Doesn't start with a, hey buddy, uh, you know, like that kind of thing. And I'm not even on it. Like he's been doing it all day, like another fucking bike in the alley. Right, like he's got a fucking windbreaker that says alley security on the back of it.

And I didn't pay attention because I'm like, that's not how you speak to me. Also, pretty moveable bike. If it's that bum, if it's bummed him out that bad, he could just move it. He had all those dogs. Yeah, two little dogs. Anyway, also the entire alley was blocked by construction that's the other thing is there's you can't get through that alley right now, but I Don't acknowledge him because he's talking so quiet and he doesn't look at me

So I'm like, I'm not he if he wants to talk to me and come around and he comes around He's like, hey man, like now he's got a little edge in his voice. Like. He's just got a butterfly knife out. Which moves the bike out of the alley, like it's blocking traffic. And I look at, I'm like so, I look at the bike, I look at the alley.

Part of me thinks I'm having a stroke, because I'm like, I swear it's not in the alley. And he says it again, and I look at him, and I'm just like, hey man, fuck off. Like I just was not in the mood. Oh, you hit him with the FO. I hit him with the FO. I didn't know that when I pulled up.

I hit him with the- Did you say it just like that? We were like, hey man, fuck off. Yeah, like that. I hit him with the FO first. Which I don't think is a surprise to anyone who knows me super well. No, you drew first blood.

I drew first, but he was escalating the conflict. I mean, he was like, he was doing that nimby bullshit. He was like being really like, and he had like an edge at his voice. Like he was like the sheriff of the neighborhood kind of thing. And then it escalated from there. And then people started slowly showing up.

You know what I mean? We all walked out. He thought he had the upper hand because at first it was him and two little dogs, right? Yeah. Ha ha! Ha ha! If it's not, if I don't do you, my little dogs will. My little dogs right yeah if I don't do you my little dog Rico tick tick but I'm

like look whatever gonna get in the fight like I know we're not gonna get in the fight and like he starts he starts walking away you know like I'm like like he's like what is how you talk to people man I live here I live here move the fucking bike and I'm like it's not in, is that how you talk to people, man? I live here, I live here. Move the fucking bike. And I'm like, it's not in the alley. It's just not in the alley. I can't move it anymore.

And he wanted me to move it down the sidewalk to where it was also not in the alley. I think it was already accomplishing 100% of the time. And then one of the people from the studio shows up and he's like, do you know him? Do you know him? Like trying to get me in trouble with the studio. And that's when I was like, don't talk to him.

This is between the two of us. I'm like, what do you think is going to happen? Where do you think this conversation is going to go? Someone with that, we're like, what do you, how's this play out for you? What happens next? When I walked up, you were like, hey friend, you're not mad at me, you're mad mad at me. You're mad at your wife.

You're mad at your family. I quickly died, because when somebody's, like, getting worked up over a bike not being in the alley, it's not about the bike. No. And I'm going to say this, though. I will say you are lucky. Yes.

Because yes, them two dogs was not intimidating on the street, but if y'all was inside that damn reverse, when they had that home court, you would burn them for rude awakening. They could have been coming at me from on top of a bookshelf. They know the terrain. They would have raised Denver style. They would have raised Denver style. They would have gotten the building over with. They're not locked in there with me. I'm locked in there with them.

Exactly. The dogs were as scared as I was because they're outside They're not they were yeah, that's the other thing when I pulled up on also my bike when I pulled up I heard the dog the dogs were going crazy They were going nuts. They were really not like in the conflict I but like I was like I don't think this is gonna I was like on like 99.9% sure this wasn't gonna turn into a fight. And then more people started showing up. And I'm like, well, it's definitely not gonna be a fight.

So I'm gonna tell this guy what's going on, which is he has a hole in his life somewhere that he's trying to shove me into. And I can't fix that problem. He has a car mouth sized hole. He thinks he does. What he needs to be is an individual above negativity. That's exactly what he needs to be.

Which is why, which is why. Now the stars are lining, the dots are connecting. I wouldn't even call myself coming in hot. I'm kind of flying high right now. That fight went exactly the way it's like ideal. It hit all the points. I get it. You punked a man. I punked a man.

Yes, and I will... Hopefully in the long run, I think I got him some help. I hope he talks to his dad. He's gonna go in the house and... He's... Hopefully in the long run, I think I got him some help. I hope he talks to me. No, no. He's gonna go in the house and, he's gonna cry in the house. He's gonna take it out on someone. I will say, I do love a fight story where somebody tell him a story

and I'm just on their side. And they're telling you like, oh, the person who I'm side on did start the fight. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, you did say fuck off. The conflict did start. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, you did say fuck off. The conflict didn't start on your head. But I'm still on your side about it. Right, that's it. And here's the top of the top of the top. I am. I don't care.

I don't give a shit if you start hitting it. Me and you were on the same team. That's how it works. I also think it was a slightly justified fuck off. No, for sure, for sure. I think it was a justified for sure if the bike was in the alley fair play She's not this is a guy going out looking for problems because he doesn't want to address the ones in his life Yeah, it ain't in the alley. It's a different color sidewalk. It just isn't it's a different color sidewalk. We'll post a picture What do we do if he pulls up during this podcast with five dudes? Like he went and got the other little dog dudes. I'd have to explain to Laura why I got in a fight.

Do they have a podcast? Yeah! Yeah! With your weekly subscriber. Cause I think we, if he has a podcast, I think we work out like sort of a guest share situation. Okay. He just goes out and picks a fight

and then podcasts about it every week. Every week. Yeah. The Ali show. We gotta get in a podcast beef. We do. Like a Joe Budden style. We're overd yeah. The alley shit. We gotta get in a podcast beef. We do, it's been- Like a Joe Budden style. We're over it, dude.

We never have. Can't be too hard to start. Who say some names? Who's got some podcasts? I'm on your team. I'm not doing it. NPR. I got, I actually got an idea for y'all.

Yeah, please. Y'all two should start beefing with Langston Kerman. Okay. And then now it's a fight for Bori. Oh, wow. A fight for the soul of David Bori. Yeah, yeah, yeah. My greatest fear.

Langston's too hot to get in that conflict with. He's too attractive. We can't. But if there's a darkness. Can we talk last year? But there's a darkness inside. There is a darkness. That's what keeps him grounded.

His special is fantastic. He's amazing. He's great. I'm. His special is fantastic. He's amazing. He's great. I'm a big fan. Yeah, you opened it. Yeah. Yeah, who are you, like, seeing that you're introducing this, who are you taking sides with?

You're taking, I feel like you're taking Langston side. Oh, I'ma be honest with you, bro. Yeah. I'ma be honest with you. I'm sitting right here, so I'ma say whatever I need to say to be safe. But behind y'all back, will be on Langston's side You give it up right here

Right here right now. I'm on y'all side. Yeah, because I know you can take it there based on the story you told before You don't want to get told to fuck off Don't want it Don't want it I just love it. Fuck off. Yeah man. Yeah, come on man.

That's what it was. It was a, fuck off man. We shouldn't be beefing with Langston. We love Langston. I'm just talking. Yeah, yeah. Langston's great. We should beef with some women.

Sean and I are gonna front of that. That would really, that's what's gonna rub the numbers on. Yeah, we're beefing now with Celebrity Memoir Book Club. It's on site if we see you anywhere Claire. Are you daddy? We don't like you. No. That's not what it's called. That's too big of a beef for us.

We can't, I don't know. Talk to her. Talk to her, okay, well. Oh, I like her though. Yeah, I do too. She's capitalizing. She's having a good time. Yeah, she is.

Nothing wrong with that. I agree. Not at all. People get so mad, it's like, you throw that money at me, I'd start a podcast too. Why? I mean, why not? Yeah. Is this the second episode in a row we've sort of defended her?

People are going to think we're low-key fun. Oh, and on the basketball podcast. Yeah, yeah. You guys defended her? We could start a beef with Zach Harper. We could start a beef with Sinepho. I've had a steady beef with Zach Harper. I really think it needs to be some women.

Yeah, you're right. I think so. Because then we'll get the beef. That's the new edgy. It is. It's a steady beef inside a carpet. I really think it needs to be some women. Yeah, you're right, I think so. Cause then like we'll get to be- That's the new edgy, it's fighting women. And a hush. And a hug. And a hug. Okay, I'm sorry, I'm sorry.

I'll take it back to Austin. Thought this was Denver style. Sean, we are inside right now. I'm gonna be, I'll start a podcast for y'all to beef with and it's gonna be called Alley Chats. That's just a good name, you should just do that. Are you siding with the guy in the alley? No, no, no, no, no, no.

Okay, as long as that doesn't happen, I don't think I can beef with you. But I think like the, for allegory of what happened today. It was an alley chat. You know what I'm saying? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm sorry, this was a bad idea. All right, we'll see what happens if you do it.

I have a total of thoughts. We'll see what happens if you do it. It's not gonna go well for you. Yeah, oh no, it's gonna go bad for me. Yeah. I'll raise my voice. Bro, to be honest, I'm so terrified of you. Are you?

I'm so terrified. Are you really? No, no, no, no. Okay, good, thank God, okay. Can I, this is a non sequitur completely, but this came up with several people yesterday. Mandel, can you do a flip? People always investigating the things, bro. What about the spirit of it?

That's not. What about the spirit of flips? People are always obsessed with the physical of flipping, but not what if I spiritually can flip? No, no. That's not what I asked you. No, but I'm saying like, it's different phases in our lives. We go through a spiritual phase, we go through a physical phase, we go through a spiritual phase go through a physical phase we go through a Denver phase yeah, and

People want to be like okay you flicking I? Love that this couch is built for both of us. Yeah, I do it You look good I'm taking that as a yes. Can you do a flip? Oh my god, bro. It's like a lure around you. I got into three different conversations yesterday and everyone was like, I think you could do a flip.

Man. And then I'm like, did you put this out? You know what's so crazy about Denver? We always wanna do our outside things inside. You'll get to we us. I'm saying as a member of Denver at this very moment. Do you think we should be talking about this flip outside? That's what people flip at?

I will say that's true. I think the mental and the spiritual part of doing a flip, I do think is underrated. I think the mental and the spiritual part of doing a flip I do think is underrated. I think that's probably half the game. You're pissing. I think that's half the game. It is. Can you imagine?

You know what the other half of the game is? It's being able to flip. It's being able to do a flip. There's a full rotation. But think about the word flip. People flip houses. And they're not literally talking about taking a house and putting it on top of his head.

They talking about changing the environment financially about the house. So like when people ask me, can I flip? They always worrying about one specific thing. It could be different things. Damn. You're right. So you can't flip.

So no then. So you can't do a flip. So you cannot do a flip. Y'all be, y'all so limited in y'all. I'm coming to this. Y'all gotta watch the movie Limitless. Y'all been at Adderall? I've seen Limitless. That's a great movie.

You all watch the TV show based on it, Limitless. For real, y'all ever seen the movie Jumper? Yeah. You ever seen Jumper? Yeah, absolutely. They be teleporting in that movie. Can you teleport? Ah, here we go again, bro. We jumper yeah, I've seen jumper. Yeah, absolutely teleporting that movie Can you teleport?

But like at some point you have to be like I'm about to do I'm gonna do a flip I'm gonna try to do a flip and that takes a level of Confidence that I think only Isaac is capable of in this conversation I've tried on a microphone. I've tried and failed to do a flip you tried and failed Yeah, what how did it what happened when it went wrong right on my back? this conversation. I've tried and failed to do a flip. You've tried and failed? Yeah. What happened when it went wrong? Right on my back. Ooft.

That's so half is more embarrassing than three quarters. It was terrible. And I've tried to back flip too, but then you do that, you get like kitty womp, you know what I mean? You bail like halfway through and then you look like a fish and then like land on your shoulder. My little brother is a big flipper. I saw him do a back flip.

And I'm forced to think that he's familial. Right? Yeah, he is a big flipper. I saw him do a bad flip. And I'm forced to think that he's familial. Right? Yeah, he is a big flipper. Like, you don't just be the first flipper in your family. So you think like generations back y'all were flipping. I think that maybe I could flip. That's hard. You're strong.

And I've seen fat guys flip before. I see it too. I think they're trying to keep fat people out of flipping. It's kind of one of the better fat guy tricks. Yeah, when you see fat guys flip. That leads me to believe I'm like, I don't know what muscles are involved actually. It makes me throw everything out the window.

When you see a fat guy do a flip, all right, who's president? Who's running this country? I believe in a deep state. It's a core strength thing. Is it a core strength thing? Yeah, and we have, and fat folks have a lot of, like up in here is all abs.

It's all abs, a lot of people don't know that. Definitely, definitely. What? I just, I don't think you feel like you've gotten satisfaction. You just want to, David's looking for a yes or a no. I just heard it so many times. It's like this song by Lemmy Craver called Fly Away.

I know this song. Is this the second day in a row I've heard you reference this? In the middle of an athletic conversation. You know what I'm saying? It's like this song. Were you talking about this in reference to you sprinting a 20-yard dash yesterday?

No. Yes, it was. It's... People... People so obsessed with the past, bro. Y'all got the memory banks. My brain on refresh at all moments. That is, bro, that is deep.

I'm living every moment in time at that very moment, bro. I don't remember what happened yesterday, two days ago, stuff like that. Who can say that? You know what happened? You flipped this question on me. Wow. Damn. You got our answer. I got flipped. I'm going to flip it over to Sean Jordan, Sean Jordan on Twitter.

Sean Cougar Melon Jordan on Instagram Yes, sir. Sean the microphone here in Denver, Colorado How's your high plans been good man? It's been amazing. We had Rory on yesterday was fantastic. Oh, yeah Oh go to the patreon. I'm nervous around that man. If you want to hear Rory Scoville draft on all fantasy everything where we ran back the serial draft. Yeah, and I have never been So abused in my you know what that? It's time for me to own up to something here I think that guy in the alley was bringing a lot of his baggage to our altercation

And now I'm realizing that I think I brought a lot of the abuse I experienced last night on stage into it I need to own up. I was also, I put my bags down too. So I'm gonna find that guy in a poly, I might go move the bike. Don't move that bike. You think I should move the, I won't move the bike. Don't you move that bucket bike. That bike, you drew a line in the sand.

That's true, I have to stand on that. Yeah, you can't move the bike. You can't move the bike. We had Rory on it, we took, the last time we drafted Serial, David wasn't with us, it was you, me. It was Shane Torres, Anthony Lopez. Shane and Lopez or Dulce and Lopez, I can't remember, but they wasn't with us. It was you, me, it was Shane Torres, Anthony Lopez. Shane and Lopez or Dulce and Lopez, I can't remember.

It was Dulce. It was Dulce and then Shane came up. That's what I thought. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You corrected me yesterday. I've been mixing it up. Sean slapped me in the face and told me I was wrong. He spit on me.

I was surly yesterday. We ran it back with Rory. It was one of my favorite live episodes we've done. Yeah, it was crazy. Yeah, you can listen to it on the Patreon. I got nothing coming up, so listen to this. David Borey is here, Cool Guy Jokes 87 on Instagram. Yeah, go to Patreon.com backslash David Borey.

Buy my special, it's $12, Birth of a Nation with a G. Hollywood's raving. I can't walk into a hip coffee shop without hearing the word Birth of a Nation with a G. Hollywood's raving. I can't walk into a hip coffee shop without hearing the word Birth of a Nation on the lips. Go to Silver Lake, see if it's not on everybody's lips. Everybody's talking about it. Hippies, children. You're doing an Arowan smoothie, you're tying it, right?

Yeah, the Birth of a Nation Arowan smoothie. It's a lot of elderberry. That's all right. It's a lot of elderberry. Yeah, you got some activated charcoal in there. Yeah. Ginger tips. Elderberry, younger berry to smooth it out though.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It's got some Matthew Berry, the fantasy analyst. Yeah. A little Halle Berry in there too.

Yeah. You can just name berries. Mary and Berry. I think I don't have another one. We should have did that today. Name berries? The best people with berry in they name. Mary and Berry. I think I don't have another one. We shoulda did that today. Berries? The best people with Berry in they name. Damn, wow.

Frank N Berry. Frank N Berry. Who did not get drafted yesterday. Berry Gordy. Berry Gordy's a good one. Berry Olmer? Gordy Howe. Nope, I'm doing it backwards, I'm sorry.

That's all right, Gordy, I think Gordy Howe counts weirdly. I gotta leave you guys. Do you have anything, the special, of course. Yeah, the special. Go buy the special. Go buy the special. Go buy it twice.

You and Sean and I's rival, Langston, are going on tour. Yeah, starting the Steel Tour. Starts October 5th. Going on my Instagram for that. I got some solo dates. I'm gonna be at Good Nights in North Carolina. I'm gonna be at the Philly Punchline. I'm gonna be in Cap City in Austin. Those. I'm gonna be at the Philly Punch line. I'm gonna be at Cap City in Austin.

Those are all coming out when I remember what the dates are. I'm active, I'm moving around. Yeah, you can't, well you only live in the moment. I live on refresh. Absolutely. And you can catch me out with the dog, Denver style. Absolutely, or in with the dog. In with the dog.

Shitting in the house, never heard Absolutely. Or in with the dog. In with the dog. Shitting in the house. Never heard that. I shit in the house. Who am I to look down on this dog? I did know a family, now that I'm thinking about it, this sucks. Now that I'm thinking about it, I know a family in high school

who let their dog shit in the basement. Their basement wasn't finished and the dogs were shitting down there. They had a, amongst many other problems. Sure, yeah, yeah. That's not the only thing. You don't go to a house and you're like, this is beautiful, and then the dog's shitting there. Yeah, it was like a lot of stuff. That's a symptom, not a disease.

Yeah. A Colorado commode, man. That was not, it was only them. That's the only time I ever seen it. Mandel is here. What are you on socials? I usually have my whole set up here, but I don't have a lot of them. Yeah, I'm really bad at the social medias,

but just the Mandelman on everything. Perfect. We got all those videos too. Yeah, I be taking them down a lot. Man, you had some good songs. Yeah, I gotta put the videos back up, but yeah, I don't have nothing going on You have nothing to be broke? You say what?

Nothing you wanna boy people talk? I have nothing going on bro You're so fucking funny Man I appreciate it man You have a really funny dude IDK they can watch Er not dude IDK A really funny don't tell they can watch online I do have a don't tell

I have a don't tell I got a You been opening for Josh Johnson? Yeah, oh okay I got a don't tell I got a... You been opening for Josh Johnson? Yeah, oh, okay, I got a Don't Tell. I got that... That Netflix introducing set that I did bomb. But it's online to see. You feel like you bombed it?

Oh yeah, big one. Really? But that's the lifestyle, man. But I did that, oh, I do have something. I have a thing on adult swim smalls on a YouTube called mandel takes a L Perfect great check that out What's and if you're if Mandel's come into your tip? I saw you last night to stand up for the first time in years since we were like on a yeah

Another festival years ago. You were so fucking funny. Thank you. You were like It was it was a very electric set. Man, I appreciate that, bro, because I did bomb the day before. I changed my pacing. That's what you were saying, but I don't know. I think you might have higher standards for yourself than it seems like.

I couldn't picture you bombing. Well, the issue is, I know I'm bombing when it's one person who's laughs, I only hear theirs, which means that they the support person of the room. No, that's not fair. It's like the footprints in the sand. It was one lady giving up like, come on guys, get into it.

It's like the footprints in the sand. That was when she carried you. Man, I don't know, cause I was doing a joke and I heard her, ha ha ha ha, and she looking around, and I'm like, she wanted me, I was like a joke and I heard her She look around She wanted me I was like man, I appreciate her. Yeah, that's a good woman Yeah, the early adopter man in this life right innovators She was she's the foundation of the of the building your building. Yeah, I'm sure afterwards I couldn't cuz I had to go home and cry man. I had to go home and cry it up

No, is it the bald guy is that the dog it's the ball guy it's the opposite of a ball guy that Spencer god damn that would have been so funny what's going on it was funny to hear a jar at the door have you ever had that that happened to me in junior high school once Where I was talking shit about this guy and he just walked up. Oh, no. Oh, no. God damn. No, I have not had that happen Something's gonna work out Jacob's selling cocaine out front The price is the same as it was yesterday, man. I told you not at work. Don't do me like that.

Oh, I get it in my head. I want to say one thing. Say everything. Me speaking about bombing was not indictments on those establishments, but more of indictment on my own performance. I just don't see a world where you were actually bombing. I think it was the establishment.

I just didn't want to be like, oh, I'm bombing. Like, the events were bad. The events were fantastic. Oh, no, no, no, no. I don't think I world where you were actually bombing. I really think it was the episode. I just didn't want to be like, oh I'm bombing like the events were bad. The events were fantastic. Oh no, no, no, no, I don't think I'm in the thing. I was bad, you know what I'm saying? The crowds were fantastic. We're not even recording this. We just wanted to talk to you. Okay, okay, okay.

I don't want to hear it. I never want to be the guy who like blaming a thing. No, no, no, everything has been fantastic. I hate that shit so much dude. I know what you mean. This is truly one of the best festivals I've ever been at. The other thing was also one of the best things I've ever been a part of. I just, I zig when I shoulda you mean. This is truly one of the best festivals I've ever been at. The other thing was also one of the best things I've ever been a part of.

I just, I zig when I shoulda zag. I hear what you're saying, fuck High Blains, fuck Netflix. No, no, no, no, no, no. Mandel says fuck Netflix. No, fantastic, no, no, fantastic. I'm gonna get Robbie Prong the morning of real quick. High Blains is fantastic, Netflix is fantastic, everybody's fantastic to me.

Sometimes I just get a little loosey goosey in that brand. I noticed you didn't say Denver is. Denver's fantastic to me. Sometimes I just get a little loosey goosey in Denver. I noticed you didn't say Denver is. Denver's fantastic. Denver's fantastic, and I'm gonna be honest with you. With the pooping and the Rome, culturally once you adjust, it's all good, man. That's a tough compliment to say. Culturally once you adjust, it's fine.

When you go down there, what's it, down there, uh, them islands off the coast of, uh, in South America, man. Like the Bahamas? The Canaries? They put their toilet paper in the trash can. Bro, we had to do it in Costa Rica and I thought they were kidding. They're like, you gotta put your shitty toilet paper in the garbage, and it's so hot, and it reeks. I would have a lot of trouble with that.

Absolutely, yeah. Yeah, because the plumbing doesn't get the toilet paper. I need that toilet paper to be gone. Yeah. Right, I needed to have never existed in the first place. Costa Rica dumps. I had like 18 mojitos one day, and I gotta put that toilet paper. Don't put that on Costa Rica.

That's a Shawnee kitchen. Yeah, that's right. I also did it in Davenport one time. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I think that might have been a Denver dump this morning. Jacob, are you selling- I was alright last night. Are you selling cocaine, Jacob?

It's time, okay, he is. Yeah, okay, great. Just to verify- Did you toss me a tea, Jacob? No, but it- Oh, if you grab me water, I'll take literally any flavor. Absolutely, once you adjust, you realize it's all good. It's all good?

It is, it's a very great place. Absolutely. My name is Ian Carmel, at Ian Carmel on Twitter, Instagram, YouTube. Follow me on YouTube because my special is finally gonna be coming out here. Great, what'd you name it? Fairly soon.

I don't have a date. I am naming it Comfort Beyond God's Foresight. And thank you. I'm very excited for people to see it. That's kind of all I have to promote. Watch Nikki Glaser on Thursday Night Football, where I am helping write jokes for that. Watch Ellen's special on Netflix.

I haven't had a fly around in a long time. It's just basically watch all of the blonde people I helpy funny. And that's kind of all I have to buy a t-shirt swim club leave Oh leave reviews on Goodreads or Amazon for t-shirt swim club if you can that helps it sort of stay in the algorithm Even better and leave reviews for all fantasy everything while you're at it Yeah, and leave a positive review for you for dude IDK studios in Denver do that because I think I may have fostered one negative one We have an update what do you do not

Who's Brian that's Brian That fucking guy was okay, so I don't have to deal with any of this I need to apologize to Nick I Know that's oh no, okay, so basically this man- No, put it in! This man has texted the studio owner. And it's not his first time being a bit of a Karen, to use a term from a few years ago. What a coward. That's so lame. That is insane to me.

It's so lame. Oh, what a dork. And we're back in. Brian. Check out my book, T-Shirt Swim Club, available now in book and also in audiobook form as well on Audible, Amazon, all those places. Sean, you read it. Sure did.

There you go. First book I read in a minute. Great. Good job. Thank you. We're gathered today not to edit things out, the updates on the conflict. Come find us in person and we'll tell you about it. Or to admire Isaac's string of just great fits. I think it needs to be pointed out.

Can you imagine being a grown-up snitch? I just can't even wrap my mind around that. That I honestly can't. I can't even be, I can't fathom texting someone being like, I need to call me so I can complain. Sorry, it blows my mind. I'm also a homeowner now, so it's not, I can put myself in it blows my mind. I'm also a homeowner now So it's not I can put myself in his frame of mind and I myself as well

You're invested in a neighborhood now would use that wouldn't you say I'm in a neighborhood. Yeah. Yeah, I got a house Sorry to bring it back up. I know we're cutting that out, but like what a baby, dude I but even just being like can you call? Someone's putting their bike in the alley. That's what I'm saying. The bike is near the alley! Move the bike, bro. And it's not in the alley. A man was disrespectful to me.

Nick, help. Nick, help me. I was disrespected by a man. And I'm following you, maybe like four hours after he already left. And he'll never be back in a foreseeable future. I just moved into a house from my mom's town town. Here's one strange take I have on this.

Yeah. He would have done that if you were still fat. I think you're right. I don't think he would have done that if you were still a fat guy. You think I would have gotten into a conflict with him? I don't think he would have told you to move the bike. No. If you were fatter. I don't think he would have done that if you were still a fat guy. You think I would have gotten into a conflict with him? I don't think he would have told you to move the bike No. If you were fatter.

I don't think so too. I've lost some aura. I've definitely lost some aura. Yeah dude, you're a bitch now. What's up? Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa! Now we gotta cut off me saying the B word. See, you see what happens now?

Sean's raising up his fucking hand. Yeah he is. I don't like it one bit. I'm new to Denver style. I'm freaking out. I don't know what to do. What are your fucking linen shorts coming to me? I got a tight cross, dude. It's been a while. I got the tight cross, painted nails.

Isaac, leave it all in, dude. Leave it all in. Told Mandel about being a Crip last night. We unpacked that whole thing. I would love to have been there for that. What a whirlwind of experience. Yeah. What a whirlwind.

And I'm so, I gotta say, I'm thankful for Kyle Kanane. It's a moment where I'm explaining the regionality of gangs, and it's me and a bunch of white dudes in their late 30s. Denver style, Denver style comedians. I need to break free from this circle before I embarrass everybody in my family. I need to break free from this circle I don't think this is a good look and I'm like you are correct We're getting in a not to not to

Sing the praises of Kyle Canane though. we could do that for days and days and days. What a gem. What an absolutely lovely man. We are here instead to fantasy draft the worst zoo animals. Mandel, this is one of your two ideas. Yes. And I was so... And I'm just filled with gratitude to go through this. And can I say two things before we get started? Absolutely.

And I'm not trying to take over the program. But I understand that as I make these selections, I understand that zoos are not necessarily the best place for well beings of animals. And a lot of my choices here are based on my entertainment values. And not so much about their health. Absolutely. Yeah, I hear ya.

That is a great preamble. But as I say that, let's be aware that I know that what I'm saying is about me when it shouldn't be. Yes. But it can only be. If we were here drafting, you're 100% right. And it's good that you got that preamble out. Please don't tweet at any of us about Zeus. We don't have any power in that situation

Tweet at me about Zeus. Tweet every fucking thing you want to me about Zeus. Put my name in it. I don't give a shit. Tweet us your ideas But if you do care about the well-being of animals go ahead and send that all to Sean whose wife is a Zoology And answers every DM. Yeah Yeah, go ahead. Your shit will get lost amongst the porno bots. Unless you're that roller blader. Some roller blader called me a jock

and then his ex-girlfriend hit me up and she's like, I think that's my ex-boyfriend who's DMing you because he hates you. Oh, that's so funny. Really? I didn't know that update. Yeah, yeah, it was, I mean, months ago she sent me that but I'm like, yeah, she kind of explained what he might sound like. I'm like, that sounds. Yeah. Yeah, it was I mean months ago. She sent me that but I'm like, yeah

She kind of explained what he might sound like I'm like that sounds like the dude Yeah, also a special short shout out short out short out. We're short shout out to Courtney Cordova at the Madison Zoo Yeah, oh she was great. She was awesome. She had us feeding bears. I got a touch of rhino, dude Rhino and then he saw a rhinoceros. That's right. Touch the rhino. We did a bunch of Madison cocaine touching the rhino, baby. Kanaan took you to a back room, speaking of Kanaan, let you touch the rhino.

We, at the zoo in Madison, they have a thing with the club there where they'll bring you back and you could do like a backstage tour of the zoo. Wow. We got to do. Close. This is a picture of David Petten like a rare turtle.

Oh snap. Oh yeah. It's early, man. Hey, tell the truth. Yeah. What it smelled like back there? Not great in the turtle room. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Not great in the turtle room. No, or the bear room. I will say probably the best room with that many turtles has ever smelled. Fair. You know what I mean? Well, I think that turtles are like one of those things where the people who have them in zoos keep them well.

The people who have them at home, bad at it. Bad. Bad at it. You cannot create a loving environment for a turtle. Not in your house. No, not in your house. You know what I mean? Absolutely not.

Not even you, Isaac, Sitting there all smug. Or like when people have too many reptiles and it smells crazy in there. I hate that. It does. I had a few frogs back in the day and it just reeked in my room. Those aren't inside smells.

No. Yeah, it wasn't. It wasn't good. The way we do. It's not Denver. That can't be Denver's now. The way we do Denver the Order in this rap. It's a rollicking game of rock-paper-scissors

But playing between the three of you and we throw on shoot you ready Rock paper scissors shoot. Oh David wins a paper against two scissors cuz all man out. Oh I was like what I was kind of mad Yeah, it's an unnatural It's a three-person Rock paper says David is the winner is to come upon you to determine the order of today's draft before you do that I was like. Yeah, it's an unnatural thing. Yeah, Denver style. It's a three person rock paper scissors. David is the winner.

It's incumbent upon you to determine the order of today's draft. Before you do that, I will remind you, it is a serpentine draft. And what is that? It's a great question. Like filling up an ice cube tray. Oh, that's great.

Right? Yeah. Where, and most ice cube trays only have the two rows, but let's say you got one of those, it's like the five, six row, more of a square situation. Smaller ice. Yeah, smaller ice. So you fill the top. This row more of a square situation. Smaller ice. Yeah, smaller ice. So you fill the top.

This is how I do it anyways. Start and I just go left to right and then I just go down a notch, right to left, then down a notch, left to right, until they're all like evenly filled. And then I kinda tip it a corner so the ice doesn't all harden on top so they're not attached.

So there's a little gap in there. That's great. Basically what it means is you pick fourth in the first round you first in the second round Now David without mind, what will the order of today's draft? I gotta go first cuz I gotta get my first pick Shaw me Shawn Mandel Ian David Shawn Mandel Ian put the order right here And alien bundle of the mandel the mandelian. The Mandelian. On Disney Plus. Huh? Oh, with Bill Burr? No, with, oh yes, yes, with Bill Burr.

And on that, truly mediocre joke I made. Let's go ahead and go to our first break. This episode of All Fantasy Everything is brought to you by Babbel. Now, if you are thinking about giving yourself a gift this year for the holidays, which you deserve, go on and do it. It doesn't just have to be a gift. It's a brought to you by Babel. Now if you are thinking about giving yourself a gift this year for the holidays,

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This show is sponsored by BetterHelp. Now I got a question for you. We asked the same question quite a bit, but it is very important to us. What do you do strictly for yourself? You know, a lot of people work out, uh, some people, myself included, I like to walk. Some people eat a popsicle every day. I don't know any of those people, but I bet they exist. Uh, you gotta have those, like those non-negotiable things, those things that you do just for yourself. And the more that, uh, your schedule gets packed, the more you can kind of skip those

things. You know, you got kids, you got work, just stuff. I mean, sometimes I don't even know where the day went. It just disappeared. Like this last weekend, for example, it was just going to the hotel. That was my non-negotiable. Had to get it done. Just something for me. And a lot of people, non-negotiables like therapy are more important than ever. If that's something that you need and you're not finding time for it, you gotta change that.

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Visit BetterHelp.com slash All Fantasy today to get 10% off your first month. That's BetterHelp, H-E-L-P dot com slash All Fantasy. And we're back, welcome back to All Fantasy Everything, the only podcast that has ever existed live a dude IDK studio Here on its last day in existence before it's for Brian shuts it down tiny dogs What Brian's got a bazooka

I'd like to see him load the dog into a bazooka and shoot it at I would lose I wish there was a way for him to listen to this, for him to find it. We are drafting worth two animals. Maybe he's a fan. He was. David, you have the first pick. Small fish. Yeah.

What the fuck are we doing here? Blows my mind. In this whole shit, and I gotta, why am I even in this room? It's fucking insane. I gotta, I could have that at my house. I don't care if they're rare. I don't give, and they're not rare. It's like those little my house. I don't care if they're rare. I don't give in

They're not rare. It's like those little Tetris. Yeah, the ones with the red stripe. Yeah, the fucking we wasted my time for it's I If I could put myself in a zookeeper shoes, which is my next book We bought a zookeeper. We bought a zookeeper. I don't know if I should write that. We bought, unless it's like an SEC foot donor who's like, like, you know, like, I bought a zookeeper. Like, he's got, like, in his back pocket. So he's, like, influencing the actions of that zoo. You know what I mean? Do they have that, like, zoo? Zoo boosters?

This is, yeah, this is off topic. But are there people who give enough money to the zoo and they're like hey I gave you ten thousand dollars last year can I get a fucking panda bear? Hundred percent I think that's how that works. Absolutely. I think to get a panda would cost a lot more money but I do think there's like people who've like I donated ten million dollars to the zoo and I don't want to say animals but like now you got to get this kind of animal.

Wow. Yeah, and they might even get to pick the name or something. I bet they do. That's a level of power I didn't know I wanted. I want you to name it Cheryl. The World of Zoo Boosters. Courtney, hit us up if The World of Zoo Boosters is indeed a true thing.

We're writing a cartoon right now. Zoo Boosters? And I wanna make a comment on what you just said, and I agree with you, I'm actually sad that you got that pic before me We got aquariums So my thing is if I'm gonna do the fish thing I'm going to the fish establish. It's a different day. Yes It's a whole different day whenever they have no small fish and I'm saying are you being lazy man?

Yeah, that aquarium in Atlanta is no joke that that's where I'm going to fantastic. I can talk about that for 15 minutes. Y'all really don't let me get involved. The only beluga whale I've ever seen. Right there. Okay, also the end is the- Oh sorry, well that one's gonna be on your list. Oh dang, well I'll be careful. I'm gonna say that's the only beluga whale I've ever seen with acne. It got acne because it got eczema, acne, one of the two. I can't tell which one, because it's a whale.

But it does have spots on it because it's the environment. And when the Georgia Queen first opened up, they had a scandal because in the cafeteria, I said this on so many pockets, but it don't matter. But in the cafeteria, they used to sell fish sandwiches. They would sell them fish. That's fucked up. Bro, look it up.

That's fucked up. They used to sell fish sandwiches and people got mad because they had the fish sandwiches in the aquarium, but I'm like, man, let's take it to the next level. Let me pick one. Let me go get that. I grabbed that door and see what that tastes like. Let's get experimental. No, that's. I grabbed that door, you see what that taste like. Let's get experimental, man.

No, that's a whole different restaurant. But that's a restaurant. That's a restaurant. Bro, can I tell my favorite, bro? I know I'm getting a side trip. Please. Can I tell you my favorite Georgia Aquarium story? So you know they getting they,

they getting they blackfish on in there. Oh. They got an orca? No, they ain't got an orca, but they got dolphins and they got seals. Okay, okay. So the seals, they do tricks. They do a little trick thing with the seals, man.

Hey bro, so they like, man, we rescued these seals, man. These seals would have caught, I ain't gonna say what I'm about to say, but these seals would have been dead if it wasn't for us, man. Matter of fact, we feed these seals three times a day. And then you realize they do three shows a day, so the seals gotta dance to get the food. Oh.

And then, okay, this is my favorite thing. I'm gonna say this, I promise I'm gonna try to make this quick. But one time I was watching a dolphin show, and... Just by yourself? It's a lifestyle, man. So they got the dolphins, they. Dolphins in there flipping. They doing their flip thing. You know dolphins love to flip.

Is that where you learned how to flip? You connecting the dots. And you know it's Atlanta style, so we don't let it poop in the house. It poop in the pool. That's not our style! I'm sorry, I'm sorry. We're a great city. No, no Denver's a great city.

I'm having an awesome time. But look, we was in the, we was in the, the Dolphins is in there and they do this thing where the Dolphins do a trick. So all the Dolphin trainers are like, for some reason they're all like gymnastic looking ladies, like very small ladies. And it's a moment where they do this thing where they call the Dolphins and then they'll ride with the Dolphins across the pool like Poseidon.

Like right on their head. Now, the lead Dolphin dude is like a 220, maybe 6'2 man. He like a bigger dude. So then they say, Charles Daniel, whatever their names is, they come down down, so they the biggest dolphins. But then Deontay come. Deontay, somebody like, nah, Deontay, go back. Charles and Daniel get down there.

He stand on them fish head. I mean, well, dolphins ain't fish, but he stand on them water mammal's heads. Man, them dolphins almost drowned, man. They went up. I'm talking about my brother. Everybody else who stood on dolphin head, they zoom across the up. I'm talking about my bro. Everybody else who stood on dolphin, they zoomed across the lake, I mean the little pool.

He got on there, they dipped for a little bit. They almost fell, they had to come back down. They struggled to get to the other side of the pool. And I said, y'all going to jail, man. Y'all get this big old dude off these dolphins, man. Why he still doing this? This all a power move. He no good or what?

He too heavy for these dolphins. They wouldn't got the biggest dolphins in the pool, bro, and they was struggling. Oh, that's hilarious. Sorry to derail the show. No, that's exactly, that is the show. That's a good anecdote. And that's where they should have the little fish not at the fucking zoo

Yeah, it's that dress. It's crazy. It's just like it just it always it never doesn't feel like a waste I think it makes it feel like I think they think it makes me feel more evocative of the actual region But I'm like, I don't care get it. Yeah. Yeah, I would have gone to sub-saharan Africa. Yeah You could put something cool here, but you could put more monkeys in there. I'm sorry, I'm saying pigs, I'm saying pigs. Hopefully nobody thinks of all monkeys. Sean Jordan, time for your first pick. I don't like seeing cockroaches. Wow.

That's good. I can think about it. We have these at home. I can just go walk on the street. You could open your fridge. They don't, stop it, stop it. I just, they gross me out so much. I can't, I was at OMSI, it's a museum in Portland

and somebody- Not a zoo? They're, right, well- It's not a zoo. It's not a zoo. It's a museum of science and industry. Right, but it was a woman had a cockroach out and like was, you know, you can hold it if you want. It doesn't feel germane to the conversation.

I was at the zoo and I saw some cockroaches one time and that reminded me of a time I was an OMSI and then this woman had a cockroach in her hand and it was like, I just don't, I don't need it, I don't need to see them, I don't need to see what they're up to, I don't need to hear them hissing. No. They just, I can't, I just, I don't like it.

I don't care that they're from Madagascar. No, right, yeah, or a rare ball. That's the coolest thing. This is the problem that they have in Madagascar. I don't need to. Oh, a rare ball? That's the coolest thing. This is the problem that they have in Madagascar. I don't need to say that. Also, they're from Cleveland. Yeah, they're from everywhere. Yeah.

Come over here, we have some Cleveland cockroaches. All cockroaches are from Cleveland, you little hens. Actually, okay, if they had an exhibit. The question phone's gonna think about that. If they had an exhibit where like, here are the cockroaches from the world's 20 biggest cities. That'd be hilarious. And you could compare and contrast like,

oh, that's what a Tokyo cockroach looks like. You know, and like that. Great band. And that was the extent of Tokyo cockroach rule. Was that to get Brian a Tokyo cockroach? I almost did, yeah. I just like the idea of like in a zoo in another country, you know how they'll say where the from and they have Cleveland indigenous Cleveland cockroaches

and like it's like an Indian zoo. And they're like these are from the Ohio region of the US. These are from the most disgusting regions in Cleveland. They have like a fake little Cleveland set built. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. A bridge that needs to be updated. Yeah, I just, they don't fat, like, some of those other insects you might find in those

exhibits are fascinating, but cockroaches, I'm just like, I don't, I don't know. I don't need them. It's nothing but a great pick is all that is. Thanks, bud. Mandel, time for your first pick. Okay, so I had an original pick, but I think I'ma move my third to number one for the sake of entertainment. Absolutely.

And I'm going with the Liger. Oh, that's an abomination. The Liger is over. The Liger is reaffirming my belief in God because when you start mixing stuff that ain't supposed to mix, it's sick. Careful. Talk to him. Okay, so I was in Florida.

I was in Florida one time looking for Carole Baskin to ask for a hand in marriage. Yeah. But when you get down to Florida after the documentary came out, they closed down shop, man. But Florida is like the multiverse, where if in this universe of Carole Baskin does not exist, in different cities it's the same thing.

So if you go to Florida, it's multiple blonde-haired, late 40s, early 50s, jaguar-we wearing printed t-shirt white women who own a lot. Like there's a Boca Raton Carobat. For sure, yeah. You think they have a Clearwater Carobat? Yes, yes, yes, yes. Like the meetings with the families and they go, yeah, yeah, they must, yeah.

So I'm in Sarasota, Florida. Sarasota, Florida. And we go to a makeshift zoo where, I wish I said the picture on my phone, but when you park you park next to the lion cage Like the parking lot. There's a steel cage in between them. It's like very small. Yeah, we go into the zoo They got a tie gun a tie gun fantastic Wait, so you're anti LLiger pro-Tiguan.

Pro-Tiguan, anti-Liger. Tiguan, if the daddy. What's an anti-Liger? No, anti-Liger. So if the daddy a tiger, that's a Tiguan. If the daddy a lion, it's a Liger. So it's like a mule. Absolutely.

And a donkey. Absolutely. Okay. That Liger man, I mean, he had to be on some Xanax, man, I mean, he was lethargic, he couldn't move around, he would cross-eyed, he would just really. Oh, there's a lot of Ligers are slow. And they're, yeah.

I do know that. And they're all, none of them can mate. Like, that can only happen once. Yeah, they're like a mule. Like a mule, yeah. Yeah, but it was just, he was just sitting there. That's how you know it's bad. Right, exactly. He can't do nothing. God was like, no,. Like a mule. Like a mule. Yeah. But it was just, he was just sitting there. That's how you know it's bad.

Right, exactly. There's nothing. God was like, no, that's it. That's how you know interracial is fine, because Blasian people could have sex. Absolutely. Absolutely. For sure. Was that weird?

No, no. That's not weird at all. No. Blasian people. Hines Ward. Eh, eh. Bro, my cousin went to school with Hines Ward. Did he really?

My cousin's buster Owens. Oh yeah. They went to the UGA together. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh shit. Yeah. That's a cute one. Yeah.

Back to it. He's doing great. But I will say the liger was so, when you first look at it, you're like, oh man, this a fusion, man. It's kind of like them fusion Jordans. Remember when they was fusing the Air Force One? Not a good. With the Jordans? Gross. And it's like, and man, this a fusion, man. It's kind of like them fusion Jordans. Remember when they was fusing the Air Force One? With the Jordans?

And it's like, an idea, this is cool, but on the foot, you're like, whoa, like, this satanic, like, you know, whatever. It is kind of satanic. It looks right. They call it the six rings. Yeah, man. And they're like, they're always super fat.

And I'm a fat person and I'm rocking with fat people. But it's like, you could tell it's just one post to happen, you know. It kinda knows it's not supposed to be. That's why they call them an off-brand Florida Zoo. Yeah, they don't have them in no big zoos. They always in like somebody's storage unit or whatever. Yeah, there's no Ligers like the San Diego Zoo. Yeah, Yeah. I got a zoo in my house. There's no library like the San Diego Zoo.

Yeah, yeah. Yeah, that's a good pick. That's a great pick. Fuck, all right. It's time for my first and second picks. I'm gonna go, just to get a little distance from my true number one pick. It's a little too close to Sean's,

but I'm going with a camel for my first pick. Oh. I just feel like that's closer to where I wanna see a horse than where I wanna, you know what I mean? Like I, listen, brother, I don't wanna say pics either, but everything in that family could go. A lot of that stuff can go. Kick them all out.

I'm 100% with you. Kick them all out. And the camel is the number, every time I see a camel in a zoo, I'm like, the zoo's better than this, and it's kinda disrespectful to the camel. Yes. Cause I think that if time I see a camel in a zoo I'm like the zoo is better than this and it's kind of disrespectful to the camel Yes, because I think that if you if I want to see a camel, I want to see one of those ones that those Saudi guys are breeding abs that one fucking swim. I want to see the racing camels. I don't want to see just yes Yeah, your camel. No, I don't want to see the zoo's camel. I just it doesn't do anything for me. It's sitting there

It's chewing it. I'm like this is just a horse from a different region. Yeah, it's a horse over there. It's a horse over there. It's kind of a cow over there, too. You know what I mean? It's not really doing anything for me at the zoo. I'm not, maybe we're too far removed from Lawrence of Arabia and the romanticism is gone, you know? Y'all ever seen them videos of them camels eating that cactus then they eat the lemon and they start flipping out

No, yes. Yeah. Yeah, they go nuts and then they go like So they put a whole cactus in his mouth spikes on it. Yeah, he down that Like nothing cat camera camel eat cactus like I eat sweet chili Doritos. They munching them down. Is the limit a spine-based limit? Like their mouth has just gotten all the spikies in it that it can take? Nah, it's a flavor palette thing.

Oh. They get that limit, they be ready to fight. But then they get that lemon and it's insane. Oh, it's like when I drink tequila, or when I ride a bike. You know what I would like to see is both of your explore pages. Oh, my junkie is bizarre, bro.

Too many. I'll do a check in. Honestly, too many girls on mine. No, I mean Sean and Mandel specifically. Oh, I would like to see theirs next to each other. That could break the internet. We should all do a little explore fight. I watch a lot of fights on the internet.

Like, I watch fights for days. Yeah, I don't want you guys involved. I watch fights for days. Yeah, I don't want you guys to see mine. I'm scared. I, Nyjah hangs out with too many hot young girls and now all these girls are on my explore page and I'm not looking them up, but they're there because I'm on Nyjah's. I'm telling you, I'm serious. Mine would be filled with fights and shoes.

Mine has a hot girl on it for the first time. You don't have to. But will you tell her, we just text her out of nowhere and be like, Sean's explore page is crazy, it's not his fault. Mine has a hot girl on it for the first time I've ever checked. Intrude, I don't like, and this is not me trying to cover it up, I don't know how that happened.

Mine's not working. If it's not a thing I follow on Instagram. Well you wanted to masturbate one day and you looked up a hot girl. Well how did they find out what I masturbated to? What's in Nigel Houston's page? That must've been that. Yeah, see, it's a fight in its shoes

and its baseball highlights. I've been getting mad baseball highlights lately. I, see, it's a fight, and it's shoes, and it's baseball highlights. I've been getting mad baseball highlights lately. I'm not doing this with you guys. Yeah, let's get out of this. And Alexandria D'Addario. Mine just had an Alexandria D'Addario. A couple different pictures of Alexandria D'Addario. I probably did look that.

I think it's mostly my appreciation of the comedic works of Mike White. So, camel is my first pick. Camel's a good one. Camel, I just like, get it out of here. Yeah, watch a camel eat a lemon dude. I'm at a zoo. Now I'm going to say an animal that I don't think,

well I'll say like, there's a lion, cause you said liger. I don't think any of us are gonna take lion. No, that would be crazy. There's a lion over there? Ah. You still can take it. Lion coulda hit my lids.

Okay, all right. It's not off there cause I would. Let's stop saying things. We'll stop saying things. Frankly, I would love to hear the argument. Yeah Tell me if this counts this getting a little this might not be And okay Tell me if this is cheap, I'm gonna shift to something that definitely counts any bird that can fly

Yep, literally any bird that can fly and I'll go ahead and feel too bad. I'll go to the Oregon Zoo I'm gonna say the bald eagle. I was gonna yeah, that was there's a bald eagle enclosure at the Oregon Zoo two things there You can see a bald eagle if you just go to the Columbia Gorge. It's really not that hard I saw one four miles from here was that to Scotty with there? Yeah, anytime there's a zoo animal where it's like, that's just two miles that way and you can see it. That's a little weird. You don't have to raise your hand,

but also you can keep raising your hand. I like getting ready for it though, I do. I'm not making this up. Y'all ever did Dead Crow in Wilmington? Yep. I haven't done it. They got an aquarium that's 30 minutes out right next to the coast. We went to the aquarium.

The first thing they had in there was a bald eagle. Insane. I said, whoa, this ain't even the genre Anwar Paes. Oh, man. I go down there, because I'm about to call the sheriff on these people. Yeah. I'm gonna say, man, why y'all got this eagleness enclosure and they start talking about the troops and stuff.

I'm like, man. I'm like, man, if I was in the military and I came down here, I came to see Fizz. You not respecting my wishes, man. Yeah. Yeah, bro. It's fucking, it's a ridiculous thing. Some witches.

So they just exist in the wild. Also, they're never where you can see them. If you want to see the bald eagle of the zoo, somebody's got to come over and they're like, yeah, so he's behind that tree. And if you angle this way, you can see a little bit of his beak. Also, also so far as to say say I think it's anti-American. I think so too. The one symbol of our freedom

and you're gonna lock that down? Yeah. That's crazy. It's insane. That's crazy. It's a nice thing to do. It should not be the spirit with which we live in our lives. Fly free, let that thing fly.

It can probably smell the river in Oregon too. You know what I mean? Like it can probably smell the river in Oregon too. You know what I mean? Like it can probably smell the place it wants to be diving for like salmon and pulling them out of the river. Yeah. I'm with it. It feels diabolical. It feels dastardly.

I don't like to use that word. I'm with you completely. Man, it's time for your second pick. Dang. Yeah. I wanna see which one. Cause we was talking about that lion one. Yeah. Feel free. Yeah, you can take it, you can take it.

I'm gonna go ahead and put the lion down, bro. I've been to many zoos across the country. Yeah. That's not a surprising stat. I've been to a lot of zoos. Honestly, I've been to some, with Kage's song without. Sometimes the zoo can be up here.

One thing I've noticed, I ain't never seen a lion enclosure with the lions awake. Yeah. They always laying down. Go crazy. They always sleep. They never do it. You go see them gorillas? They in there acting up.

They in there playing dominoes. Yeah. You know what them gorillas? They in there acting up. They in there playing dominoes. You know what I'm saying? They in there making deals. Banana for apple. Commerce. Them lions in there, they not, I ain't seen nothing. Roar. Nothing.

They boring, bro. Yeah, it's like they're on Trazadon or something. Cause they not hunting nothing. No. They like to sleep and hunt. They took away the one thing that they do for activity. Yeah, they don't hunt. So they born. It's never fun.

Now I ain't been in no wild safari. Maybe in the safari you see them things gallop across the grass plain. Right. But in the enclosures. I've never seen a lion run. A lion run. No, I've seen them a trot in a zoo

Yeah, I will say so there they've got two things going against them. They can't hunt like you say they put like they'll put a tie A tire in there for them to like flip over. They don't care about that. It's a crepuscular creature Oh, yeah, it's awake in the like at dawn and doesn't eat meat and that's when it moves around. It's crepuscular But there they they like when they're active is dawn and dusk, which is when we're not in the zoo. So we would never get to see it anyway if they are moving around like that. So we're doing a disservice of it even having it in there. It's just, I mean, if it's ever active, it's like when the sun is coming up.

That's when they like get up and move around. Like house cats are like that too. Right. You see them, they sleep in your house all day. Oh man, I saw my cat. But they're like, wake you up at 5 a.m. just fucking going bug and move around. Like house cats are like that too. You see them, they sleep in your house all day. But they'll like wake you up at 5 a.m. just fucking going bug nuts running around. I woke up and I couldn't sleep and I was reading. And I saw Mike, it's like a whole different life.

They're living a different life. Yeah, she was going crazy. She was like chasing shit. Yeah, they go nuts man. Well that's what I'm saying. I feel like maybe in a safari, like if you went to, I know people be going to safaris in other countries. Maybe there, they doing they thing,

but in a zoo it's nothing, bro. It's a magisterial creature to see sometimes. I will say, you get to see it and you're like, that's crazy. You see how big their paws are? Big paws. Catchers mitts, take you right out of the game. But you're right, they are always boring. Yeah, they're not showmen.

Yeah. No. They're Jack Nicholson at this point. Just kind of sleepy. Just getting a check. You donate enough money to the zoo, you can name a lion Jack Nicholson. And I will. I'm going alligators.

I don't like, same kind of thing where it's like I really only see their face most of the time. Like they're really really or they're just Just existing somewhere. They're not moving or anything. It just doesn't do much for me This is also the case they're not fast. They're not fast. Yeah, you know it just they're not like Adorable or anything. I don't know. It's just like they're just sitting stationary. I can see their snout sometimes I don't know. Can's just like they're just sitting stationary. I can see their snout sometimes, I don't know. Can I push back on this?

Yes, absolutely. Have you been to an alligator farm, though? Uh-uh. When they teach them how to do them tricks. They come, they like, oosh. The adrenaline is pumping. Shove out of the water like a shark and eat a whole turkey. I've never seen an alligator move, I don't even think.

Really? Maybe, maybe, very, very slowly, but yeah, they don't they don't see the videos when they put that they put their hand in the alligator mouth And then they yank it back and then they snap yeah telling you that would be don't to see Now you've seen Joe dirt I have seen Joe dirt amazing Now you've seen Joe Dirt. I have seen Joe Dirt. Joe Dirt's an amazing movie. It was actually loosely based on his life.

Yeah. You know this, I forget which animal this was true of, so don't test it on either, but it's either alligators or crocodiles. The muscles in their mouth, maybe it's both, to close are so strong that they could like, you know what I mean, like break a car door, but the muscles to open are so weak

that you can like keep it closed with either your hands for sure sure or like a rubber band. Yeah, that's why people... They're not strong enough to like... Oh, that's why when they wrestle them they get them around. Well, you can just grab their mouth and keep it shut. They can't open it. It doesn't make any sense.

Yeah. Because they could like crush a car door with it. Because it's long. So I figured, you know, like that's like... I could probably hold your fingers together like that too. I definitely could because I'm stronger than you. Damn. You guys are having your own draft. You're in your mid-40s. I could probably hold your fingers together like that too. I definitely could because I'm stronger than you You guys are having your own drag you're in your mid 40s, I'm gonna leave my little give me what you gave Brian earlier

Full reading dude full reading On your late 30s Dude's fucking zodiac sign Alright, I do enjoy watching an alligator even though I find no quibbles with any of your individual points But I do like seeing one I like their I like the way they hold their mouths Yeah, that's good. You know that like kind of like like sort of a weird smile. Yeah Delicious by the way

I don't mind that though, but if it's cooked right, if they fry it, a little fried up alligator. But I guess that's the frying doing it more. Other than cockroaches, this is the only thing that people regularly eat. What? On this list. Oh, I gotcha. So far. I think. Would you eat a cockroach? No.

No? No. I had a cricket one time, I ate one of those old like prepared crickets or whatever. I don't think it's a war with roaches though. Yeah, I Scream when I see right skin when we lived in Glendale. I screamed Okay, like a yeah like a lady. Yep. Yeah I hate bugs. We've reached a wall. I think there's no point ignoring it. I don't know what happened No, it's okay. I think it was my everybody likes alligators and I don't that's what happened. I think that is yeah We're trying to just move on. I'll just move on David. I'm here for you second third picks my second pick camouflage animals Yeah, it's great because fuck you

Fuck you. Is it in there? Yeah, I'd say 8020 it's not I think 8020 it's not. I think 80-20 it's not. They're cleaning the cage or whatever. Yeah. Fuck you. Can I stress test this? Yes. Bug that looks like a stick. Don't like it.

No, you don't like it? I love those. Those are the interesting bugs I was talking about. I like when they do that kind of, their walk is like. Where you're like, that's a leaf, but then it has an eye. All the camouflage.

I think about a zoo like I think about a golf course Yeah, rate of play sure rate of play rate of play So which one specifically like the the lizard or whatever? I'm thinking more of the bug one. Yeah, okay. Okay. Okay, cuz there are a lot of them Yeah, this is a leaf, this is a stick. This is a moth. It looks like a tree bark. Yeah, you can't see that either That's a good point This is a leaf, this is a stick. This is a moth that looks like a tree bark. You can't see that either. That's a good point. You really do have to get involved.

And then there's always eight kids in there. And I'm like, cousin, I'm high. I'm trying to get to the next animal. And then some dad's like, I found it, and brings over all the kids. And he didn't find it. Puts them all right up to the glass. He just wants to feel smart.

Cause they're kids and they're dumb enough to think that you can see some shit that's not in there. That gets me through every day my friend. I'm sorry I feel like this was not a personal attack. I feel stupid all the time and Maxine makes me feel strong and smart. Bugs that look like stuff is for the freaks. There's freaks who like that kind of thing they really get off on it. This guy in his fucking mid-forties. Fucking love a stick bug dude. Right under my sword. Real dank. Ben Roy didn't believe me. I'm nice with nunchucks. He said he's gonna find some nunchucks for me to do at AFE tonight. He's gonna find out real quick.

See that's what these jujitsu guys think. That's exactly what's going on. They think there's no other kinds of karate. He didn't believe me. And I'm like, I go, Ben, if you see me with nunchucks, you will be like, holy shit. And he's like, are you serious? He walking away and he turns around. He's like, you're serious.

I'm like, Ben, I'm telling you, I'll blow your mind if you give me some nunchucks. You've seen me, right? I've seen you do it drunk. I've seen you do it sober. You're great both. You're phenomenal. It's like muscle memory when you're,

I've seen you too drunk to walk but still none I have to pee really bad In the living room, I've done it before where like in the fortress where I'm in the living room Just going nuts and they slip a little bit. I'm like, yeah, I've seen it on right through the TV So you just you just keep it keep you got some on you. No, I have two pairs at home You can't travel with him very well. Otherwise, I'd bring them to more places TSA will get the chunks. Yeah when I did the late late show though They can't find a bomb for shit, but they'll get the nunchucks Ian, before I did the late late show He's like you should bring your nunchucks and do that for the check-in at the door because they open the door and they're like

We have comedian Sean Jordan and I'm just doing nunchucks when they open the door. It was pretty tight. That's hard. Yeah, that's hard Have you ever hit yourself with them? Not really. No, I'm pretty, it's like one thing I took to really quick when I was in Taekwondo, because they teach you all the weapons, but that was the only one that stuck. Sean's one of those sneaky athletes too.

I am. He's a very athletic. You wouldn't tell yesterday. Popped the shirt off, lost my race at Race Wars. We haven't talked about Race Wars yet. Race Wars is tough though. I almost think Race Wars is lost my race at Race Wars. We haven't talked about Race Wars yet. Race Wars is tough though. I almost think Race Wars is not athletic. It isn't.

You know what I mean? Jeff wasn't even, he was going like half speed I think and he still smoked. He's very fast, I don't know why you keep doing that to yourself. It's fun man. That's fair. I like to spark it off.

Yeah. Do you have any weapons expertise? Honestly man, no. I used to be able to butterfly knife too. Really? I used to be an expert. Yeah, me too, but I don't think that's like a... Yeah, yeah. Oh my God. That was funny.

Yeah, bro, I got a pistol. I'm back for pants. I feel like we had a good time. I can't wait to listen to it back. Yeah, dude. Who pick is it? It's mine again, because I got double picks. So I put camouflage animals was my second pick.

Donkeys. Yeah, what are they doing there? If it's at your grandpa's house, I'm not paying to come see it at the zoo. Yeah, that's 100% right. Fucking what? Yeah, my buddy had a donkey growing up. I remember when I was like, well, you can just have him.

You shouldn't be able to. It's not even special. Yeah. They're like, sometimes it's like a Mongolian donkey. But again, that's like the thing where I'm like. A Cleveland donkey, that's what you gotta do. A Cleveland donkey? First of all, watch your mouth.

I'm sorry. These fucking Mongolian donkeys. Started opening podcast studios. Yeah man, I just, a donkey, it's crazy. And here's my problem with the zoo, is that if you're gonna give all this bad horses, give me a fuckin' Clydesdale or something. Give me a Palomino or whatever, a fuckin' wild horse. But they give us all these bastardized versions.

I don't ever wanna see a donkey. I don't ever wanna see a donkey. That is something that SeaWorld got right. They have Clydesdales, SeaWorld. You're like, yeah, absolutely, people wanna see this. It's big as fuck. I wanna see big as fuck. Sometimes I wanna see little as fuck

if it's the right kind of thing, if it's not usually little as fuck, but I don't wanna see a fucking donkey if it's the right kind of thing if it's not usually a little as fuck But I don't want to see a fucking donkey It's always a tractor. Have a try. It's always a little and here's the donkey. Yeah You kind of look longer than you want to because you almost feel bad for the donkey. Yeah Yeah, you see kids pretending to be excited. Yeah. Oh mom. Look is a donkey. So one bad thing about Shrek I think you can tie this directly back to Shrek. You think so? I think so yeah. Shrek did raise Donkey Stalk. Big. Donkey Stalk was through the roof. Donkey Stalk. And that's how bad a Donkey

was to make it even palatable at all you had to put Eddie Murphy. One of the greatest of all time. Greatest entertainer at least of a generation. He did everything he could for Donkeys. Yeah. And he still didn't do much. Look, Isaac is adjusting your microphone. You can't help him, man, can't help it. Thank you, thank you.

The man can't help it. Thank you. Yeah. Donkeys a great pick. I get it, the fuck out of here. I don't know why people own them. I think it's for, other than are you Amish? Then you have a dog. I guess they're strong, right? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, there's strong

Animal or for like mountains and shit, right? Yeah Sean tell me a third pick Controversial I think but bats. I don't like bats. I don't wanna see them. I don't like the smell. Stinkiest area. You know what I found out is that is the fruit. It's not the bat. I knew that.

It's all the rotten, you didn't fucking know that. Absolutely. He didn't know that. It's all the rotten fruit. I was a zoo camp bitch. They have camp for zoos. That's two bitches on the show. Three now that you made me say it again.

Yeah, bats. I don't, I just, I don't, it's a personal thing. They just, they're so creepy to me. I don't need to see them. I like the way they, you don't like the way they look at all? I do, they're cute. What about when they're all in there going crazy? No. Okay.

There was, we were just at the Lake Cottage, I tell you this, we were at Laura's parents' cottage and we stayed at her uncle Carl's house and they had a bat in the house, which I haven't experienced in quite some time. And we were just standing there, parents cottage and we stayed at her uncle Carl's house and they had a bat in the house which I haven't experienced in quite some time and we're just standing in the kitchen and they're like yeah there's a bat in the house somewhere and they just they were so calm about it and I'm like where like where and they like

I don't know I haven't seen it a couple days and as I'm saying that I saw something like fly through the kitchen well and I'm like that bats in here and nobody believed me and then it came inches from my face. It was fucking terrifying. Do you think you have? Do you think anything comes inches from your face? I can't stand it. Come on my face.

Yeah. Do you have the guts to kill a bat, do you think? I've caught plenty of bats from the old crib. Really? Because we used to get bats all the time. They'd come in the chimney in South Dakota. Wow. So I caught one in a Gatorade bottle one time.

What? Little guy. What? Caught one in a pizza box one time. How did you get in a Gatorade bottle one time look what little guy what? Call one in a pizza box one time. How did you get in the Gatorade bottle? I can't remember I can't remember we did it was like one of those yeah like 32 ounce Maybe I think bats are bigger than they are they're not as there's some there they know yeah Yeah, they differ, but they they're real small like they can they can get tiny. Here's two things first I love so many things about you one

I like especially is how you hit the L and the word calm you get the L in there. Did I just say calm? Yeah, yeah, what'd you do every time you say calm you hit that L and I like that too I think the thing with bats that I like is that I see them in real life darting around the sky at night I hate that too. I never like I'll see like oh shit. That was a bad But I never see them up close in the wild When I'm at a zoo and I get to see him up close. I'm like, oh, that's what I'm dealing with interesting I like the ambiance of the Batcave. I do like that. Yeah, I just don't like the battle. I don't know creepy to me Yeah, and it reeks it reeks and that's the rotten fruit. Yeah, you didn't know that I did know that you know

Okay, so my next one I have and I'm not making this up you've said that like five times I know I know but this is goes back to a great value Carobastons and say I saw the Florida. German Shepherd, man. What? Oh, I don't want that, like a dog people. That would be insane to me. She had a bear cage. You were at a police station?

Bro, she had a bear cage. She had all the cages of different animals. And then she had someone big miscellaneous cage where it had an ostrich in there, a buffalo, a camel, and a German shepherd was in there. And I said, nah. Now listen, let me get full content. I don't know if that was just her German shepherd who hang out in that cage.

It might have been. But I did see a German shepherd encapsulated into But I did see a German Shepherd encapsulate it into a zoo thing. And I said, I think that's not good. That's not good at all. That should be in there. That dog is supervising the other animals. I don't like to see a German Shepherd in general. No, me neither.

No, not a big fan. They're dicey. Yeah, I don't like their presence. Traditionally used to terrify my people. I think maybe yours as well. Absolutely. Yeah. Yeah, not good dogs.

But people like you. They didn't mess with the Irish too much. They're pretty cool to me. The Brits hate German Shepherds so much they call them Alsatians. Because in World War II they freedom fried them. And they're like, I'm not calling calling I'm not using the word German for anything We're calling these interesting. Okay after the Alsace region sure I knew that I went to Zucan. Yeah

I used to play Saints Row. I did too. I I think What's that game now that like all the kids play where you build stuff? It's a shooter It's a shooter. It's a, you're looking at me, I'm looking at you. It's Minecraft adjacent, but it's huge. Fortnite, I think Fortnite can be tied directly to Saints Row.

I think that- I don't know what Saints Row is. Because Grand Theft Auto was a little bit more grounded in reality, and in Saints Row, it was like, it started getting real cartoonish. It was awesome. It was awesome. I don't know what Saints Row is, what is it? It was a video game, you would reality. And in Saints Row, it was like, started getting real cartoonish. It was awesome. It was awesome. I don't know what Saints Row is.

It was a video game, you would love it. It was a buck? Yeah, and I don't even like video games. Yeah. Can I fight? It's like a sillier Grand Theft Auto. Okay, yeah. I'm in.

And it's all purple. It's all purple. I like purple. German Shepherd's fucking nuts that she had that in the cage. Yeah, I don't want that. I don't want that. It was in the cage, bro.

And look, again, I don't know if she just like, she opened it up and she let her German Shepherd hang fucking nuts that she had that big cage. Yeah, I don't want that. I don't want that. It was in the cage, bro. And look, again, I don't know if she just like, she opened it up and she let her German Shepherd hang out in there, but when I was in there, it was German Shepherd in there. I would feel bad if I were a dog who was owned by one of those ladies. Because now it's like, I'm not enough for you, clearly, because you're bringing in all these other animals. How do you think their kids feel? Have you seen Chimp Crazy?

Of course I've seen Chimp Crazy. That lady was like, I like my monkey more than my dog. Did you see? Okay. We have to put a spoiler alert right in front. Let's not cut it, but let's say, skip ahead 30 seconds if you don't wanna have Chimp Crazy spoiled.

But that was fucking bonkers. Yes. Yeah. I watched that show. Yeah. It was amazing. It was fantastic. I don't see why it didn't blow up as big as Tiger King.

I think it should have. Because COVID is why Tiger King blew up. But I thought everybody was, I was so surprised when not everybody was talking about it. Me too. Bro, when she was full blown crying on that Zoom. Oh my God! That was fucking nuts.

When she was full blown like crying, telling this story. And then she get off and then go downstairs and Tonka in the basement. Like, bro. Come on. She was awesome. I wanted- She also turned off the crying, sorry.

She was also weeping on a Zoom court, and then it went off and she was like, fine. But isn't it like way gnarly, the show? Like, doesn't some really, really gnarly bad stuff happen? Oh, yeah, it's chimpanzees. Every episode is very clear. It's just one through line, I don't know if I'm ruining this for you.

I don't think I can watch it, I think it's gonna be too buck for me. You should watch it. Oh, well it's one through line, and then every episode does a short story of like, Carl was the chimpanzee in our town. Everyone loved him. We would give him biscuits,

and he would do a thumbs up. And then one day he ripped off Denise's face. Every time, it was the same story across the country. To me that hits so hard. I don't know, maybe it's the kid or something, but I can't do that shit anymore. I can watch grown men beat the shit out of each other all day on Instagram, but when it's something real like that,

it's tough for me. I've met a killer chimpanzee before, I told you about that, right? That's right. Yeah. In Sierra Leone? Yeah, bro, no. But then they brought him to America, he didn't like it.

Yeah. Right. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, he was still in Sierra Leone, so Americans ripped a car door off, pulling arms off and shit. Jesus. Well, you see them, they're fucking strong. I will not own an animal that can physically best me.

No, me neither. That's a great rule. You think you could take a dog? If you had to, like to the death? Do I think I could take Stella? Fuck Stella up. Yeah. You think you could take her?

Like, do you think you'd win? Yeah. I think I could take almost every dog. Yeah, same. I would have to know. You get like a Rottweiler though, if it gets your throat? What are you gonna do? I'm not letting it get my let me do my every dog bro. Not every dog like a mastiff They're so docile the strong pit bulls. I don't think yeah, that's true

They're one big muscle off one, but then I'm thinking like, you know those pit bulls who look like they should ride crotch rockets Yeah, and like have sex with women Did he get his ear pierced Yeah, and like have sex with women Or man it could have sex with men That's a girlfriend. I don't want to get too into it, but I'm going for like if he's locking on to me I'm going to like stuff that can't get fixed. Oh Yeah, I'm trying to rip the jaw. Exactly. You know, you're supposed to have a finger in the butt.

If a dog has a latch on you, finger in the butt. Of course, I've seen Friday Afternanks. I've seen that happen to somebody with a dog, a pit bull latched onto something and they, or no, they pour, it's beer in the nose or beer, liquid in the nose or thumb in the butt, and they pour liquid in the nose. Was it beer? Yeah. I like that I'm looking. gonna keep you they gotta pour beer on their face

Somebody get a beer my pimples freaking out. It's gotta be Coors original German chapter time for my third and fourth picks Okay with my third pick. I'm going back to the bug cage. I Never want to see that fucking millipede. I never want to see that You know, they eat poop they just get on big hunks of poop and that's what they eat in the wild? Really? Yes, they just eat like bear poop. It's so... like you know the one that's long, that almost looks like a beets pill?

It looks... it's like shiny, it's got that carapace to it. Oh, oh, oh. I don't want to see it. I don't think it's all that interesting in the first place place and then I just have a visceral disgusting reaction to it Yeah, I don't like the we were on a hike We're doing half dome and we were just out at night hiking and we turned on our headlamps and there was poop on the ground And like eight millipedes just going after this piece of crap. It was It was a bear it It was a bear poop. Which also is freaky. When you're out and you're like, that's bear shit?

Like that recently there was a bear here taking a dump? Yeah. I don't need that. That's a whole nother drug. Can you identify a bear poop? Laura can. I can't. Oh yeah yeah yeah. Was Laura with you? No. You gotta pour a beer on their face. Okay.

Now somebody was with us who knew it was bear, but I don't know who I sure didn't Um time for my fourth pick. I'm just gonna keep this moving. We all think millipedes are gross and I'm going with Any lizard under six feet, let's go yeah Get it out of here. What am I looking? I could go to my weird cousin's house. I know guys with lizards. Yeah, I Do you like lizards. Yeah. Do you like lizards? When they grab the fly with the tongue. How often do you get to see that?

I saw it one time and I was like this time. But you specifically said you are a man who's been to many zoos and you only see that one time? That's a low conversion rate. That's a low conversion rate. True, but I do think, and this is why I had pushback for you too, because I do think a chameleon, when you see that jump be the color as the thing, I'm like.

I've also never seen that. You've never seen that? I've never seen them change. I've never seen it actively happen, but I've seen them be the color that I know they're not. They'd be the same color as their background, I've seen that. And I like how they got the tile, not tile,

what's they skin called? The scales on the eyes. Yeah, that's cool And I do like that their eyes are like two different individual to it quick as a change like how quick does a chameleon change? I just don't like I zoom through the lizard room. I don't spend a lot of time in there Cool cool fine. Yeah Cool, cool fine Yeah, I like snakes I Want to Shane Torres's?

Apartment his roommate has nine snakes. That's crazy in New York nine. What are you hiding? What are you? I thought what is it? What are we all hiding? I would be a snake Was it you have nine different tanks, you're hiding something in one of those tanks. It was explained to me that it's a very New York, Puerto Rican thing to do, is to have a snake. And I would not say anything else.

I would have one. I like snakes. And I nodded, but I'm just relaying what Shane Torres told me. Are you scared of snakes? Like, can you hold snakes? My brother had a snake when I was growing up. Of course he did.

Yeah, he had a, I had rodents. And I was playing with my guinea pig. And I went downstairs and I picked up a snake and the snake spelled guinea pig on me. Bam, right in the arm. No, like really bad. It was like hanging off my arm. I was like, ah!

I didn't know that. Yeah, he was like four feet long. He wasn't a huge snake. That's big enough to be a bummer. Three feet, three feet, three feet. Three feet, probably. Yeah, three feet, not four. That's, probably. Yeah, three feet, not four. That's gnarly.

But skinny, like, yeah. Lizard, mandle, time for your fourth quick. So we only got two left. Two left, yeah. This one is a speed round. Before you get to this, out of due respect to Isaac, we're gonna take another short break. This episode of All Fantasy Everything

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Welcome back to All Fantasy. Everything already in progress. Mandel, it's time for your fourth pick. Okay. So I want to say that this is... This is my least I feel strong about. But I wanted to put it forth since the last round of speed round. Absolutely, I think that's important. And I might get some pushback on this.

Lemurs. Wow. Show me a real monkey. I'm not about this fake monkey stuff. I'm not about this fake monkey stuff. I only dealing real, real deal monkeys. I'm not with that off-brand monkey stuff, stop. We sing Zaboo Mafoo, we get it. I don't like the movie, movie, no.

I gotta push back, they're as active and as fun as the other ones. I love a lemur, but show me a real monkey is one of the funniest ones I've ever heard. I wanna see a real monkey, man. I wanna see a real deal, swing and cross it. They do all that. They do all that. In fact, I might squirrel face.

Yeah, but this is a prejudice in your heart against squirrels. You think so? Yeah, I don't think this is about the fun level of the lemur, no. I just feel like, bro, like, every time you see some lemurs, you like, it's so, you like, man, that's cool.

It's a little real monkey pull up. Oh, like the Phantom in the 300C. Mm, I'm gonna pretend like I know what that is. You know like the Chrysler? Oh, yes, yes, yes. Yeah, yeah. Yes, yes, yes. They have raccoon attributes.

I didn't even try. They do look like plused up raccoons a little bit. Is that bad? No, I like lemurs. Oh, I'm sorry, they made a raccoon harder? Yeah. And you guys are upset. But I'll say this though,

that's why I say it was my least one, cause like, yes, a lemur is cool until they put a spider monkey out there. I would rather see a lemur than a spider monkey. Come on, man. Cute isn't the top thing for me. I wanna see him active. Yeah.

I take active over cute. They put the baboons out there. Okay, that's different. My guy with that big old nose on him. I know, the proboscis, I know what you're talking about. All of them guys is better. No, the big hangy downy, looks like a penis nose. Oh, gonzo nose.

Yeah, gonzo nose. Yeah, looks like ball bags, right? Chimps got the, what's one of the big, is it chimps with the big balls. Yeah, it looks like ball bags, right? Chimps got the... What's one of the big... Is it chimps with the big butts? Yeah, chimpanzees. Those are a little too uncanny. They're a little...

I can see the human. That's how I feel about gorillas. I can see our history as organisms. Yeah, like gorillas. I'm like, I know guys who walk like that. For real. Gorillas walk like yesterday was leg day. They're on the football team like yesterday was leg day. They're on the football team

Maybe I brought one orangutans man. Yeah, I can see that. I like an orangutan a lot I'm gonna get to me most relaxed. They chillin but there's still they got it in them I don't like the big nipples, but they I saw an orangutan like tuck their kid in the other day Here's my beat for the orangutans say have it be orangutan. Is it for the red? I don't like that. There's no G at the end of it. Oh, yeah, you're right. Oh, you want it to be a Ranga tank orangutan I don't I cuz in Laura, maybe it's the Laura is so pronounced when she's like, let's go see the orangutans and I'm like She says orangutans That's come on collially, add the G. We're gonna see the orangutan.

That's what I'm saying, orangutan. I thought it was that till I was 20. Because of the liquid. Tang. Yep. Yeah. Oh, God. I was like...

The orangutan liquid, dude. Let them cook. I think you... I don't think you'll get a lot of support on the lemur pic, but I do love your passion. I Think you I don't think you'll get a lot of support on the lemur pick, but I do love your passion I love you made it. I love you made it, but people not real zoo zoo Parsons you're real zoo head. That's true. Yeah, and look when they put the lemur at the beginning of the zoo. I Got great example. I was in the Chattanooga Aquarium. They got lemurs in there. Very confusing to me as well. That is confusing.

Like say you're like- The fact you've referenced more zoos in this last 90 minutes than I've been to in my whole life. And I respect it. I think that's very cool. I go to the zoo a lot, but it's the one zoo. I will say this. When you go up there, when you go to the aquarium,

they start you up because they go in rainforest style. So they start within the trees and take you down into the deep depths of the ocean, which I think, great structure. I like that structure. So when you go to the top, the lemur's there first and you're like, man, it's hard. Yeah.

When the zoo put them chimpanzees, they put them bonobos or... Oh, the bonobos. Bonobos, I'm sorry. Those things are gorgeous. Those are the closest things to us. Maybe. But when they...

I can't confirm it. They get a little shaky. You know, I get a little nervous with that. But I will say... Those are the closest things to us. Oh, the proverb, everyone in this room. Us. Us. You know, I get a little nervous with that. But I will say...

Well, the closest thing's to us. Oh, the proverb, everyone in this room is the closest to a good no-go. I know, but then we'll be on the same. I understand what you said. I know you didn't mean it like that. I got every meaning in it. I know, but it got... I'm trying to take it back.

I'm trying to take it back. I'm just sensitive. I understand. I can't handle that. it back. I'm trying to take it back. I'm just sensitive. I understand. I can't handle that. But, but, but, but, it be cool until they put the monkeys first, and then that's when you like, man, this is not weak. Bro, these lemurs. Oh, you're talking about when they put

the monkeys before the lemurs. That's what I'm saying. If you look at a picture of a bonobos, you can kind of see it, that this is the closest thing to us. God. Right? Like, that kind of see it, that this is the closest thing to us. God. Right?

Like that kind of just looks like an Italian dude. Whoa, I can't get into this. This scared me, man. This scared me. This is dangerous water. I can't, I gotta go home. You were right, you were right. I saw that guy on the stand, not even fair.

What are you talking about? I tried to downplay it, and then I heard it, and then I was like, this is... This one haserry. What are you talking about? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, Sean Jordan, it's time for your fourth pitch. Not a big ostrich guy. Okay! Really? Over exposed. They're over exposed. Oh, too many. Because it is an interesting animal, but we know so much about it. That's how I feel about flamingos.

You know every time I go to the zoo and I see flamingos, I say the same joke. I think I said it to you. In Madison. I say, you I see flamingos, I say the same joke. I think I said it to you. In Madison, you did? In Madison. Let me get it. I say, you know why flamingos are pink? Why? Because they eat so much pussy. They're like my favorite zoo joke.

I can't do that to Max, but yeah. You can do it to Laura. I can do it to Laura. I think they're overexposed. We eat them now too, and that's always an awkward thing at the zoo. I just don't like them. Yeah. All right. Where are they? Where like where are the ostriches in the wild? Africa. Is it Africa? Yeah. Oh, I thought they were from Australia. No, we don't have any. Serengeti. There's no like ostriches in the North America anywhere. There's ones on ranches, but no not not a...

They don't have ostriches in Australia at all? No, you're thinking perhaps of the emu. Ooh, I don't like emu. I don't like the noise they make. No, that's a fucking- that's a mean bird, dude. Yeah. I don't like that. No. That's the noise they make. Sub-Saharan Africa. Oh, Sub-Saharan?

I thought it was- Idiot. Oh, no, I was right. The Serengeti is Sub-Saharan. Oh, I didn't know that. You stupid, gorgeous piece of- no. Oh, I didn't know that Stupid gorgeous pieces no David time for your fourth and then your final picks Hear me out. Okay elephants what they're too big. They're too big to be there. I'm never bummed out

I'm never not bummed out when I Wherever they live sucks always. They're just swimming and I just, it makes me sad. It makes me sad seeing elephants at the zoo. Whoa, we not talking about they well being. No, bro. Bro, the elephant is the best. Amanda was very clear.

Bro, the elephant is the best part of the zoo. This might be a raise and brand situation. If we was to rank our number one, elephant would be my number one. It bums me. I like it when they swim. They're always huge. I'm up there doing stuff.

I like it when they swim. They're so huge, their big shits are everywhere. Yeah, I like them. I like it. I love watching them. Watching an elephant poop is so fun. Bro, they smart. They breaking melons with their feet.

They're so smart, they know it sucks. I just, it's hard for me. I know, but we can't stop bringing that into it. Alright, you're right. We can, we can. You're right. I'm just telling you, the last time I saw him I was like, this is amazing. Also, I feel bad. You're 100% right.

I feel bad. They're fantastic animals. They mourn their dead. I love them. I love them. You're right. You're right. I love them Yeah, you're right. I want more for them as well. Absolutely It's like when your cousin's dating a piece of shit and you're like, this is you're do better than this You could do better than that piece of shit is the Oregon Zoo and that's why I Sean and I are getting defensive. Yeah

Also, it is cool that he works at a restaurant and hooks me up It is cool that he works at a restaurant and hooks me up. But. Wait. The cousins. Oh, Cal, Cal, all right, all right, all right. It was a long way. No, no, no, no. It was a long way.

It's my fault. And then lastly, speed round pick, Tarantula. Oh, no, man. That was gonna be my last pick too. Me too. Who cares, who cares? Yeah, so Laura came to this Tarantula migration last year that they have in like Golden

Where they're just walking across the freeway like hundreds of them. Oh On the on the street. I've never seen a tarantula in Colorado. Yeah here like going golden She traveled for a tarantula migration? Yeah, and they just found they just found tarantulas Bro, it's so wild. I've never seen one. You've never seen one, right, in the world? Not in the wild. Oh, in the wild, no, no, no. It's crazy to me to think that they exist in the wild.

I don't need that. Gnarly. Yeah. I have black widows in my backyard. I found two of them in the yellow. Do you black, are you gonna die, you get bit? If you get bit, it's not good. I'm calling an exterminator the second I get back.

But like- You know we're afraid of brown recluses. Those are even worse. Those are gnarly, right, but you don't die, right? I mean, if you didn't get a treat it's not good. I'm calling an exterminator the second I get back. You know we're afraid of brown recluses. Those are even worse. Those are gnarly, right? But you don't die, right? I mean, if you didn't get it treated, you might have. I mean, it fucks shit all up if you don't get it fixed. Yeah.

Like a rattlesnake, if you get bit, you're not necessarily gonna die unless you just don't get it treated, right? Like you got some time? Don't yawn while I'm talking. I'm sorry. It's not immediate, but it's bad. Yeah.

By the way, a rattlesnake bite will kill you. Eventually, but it's not immediate, but it's bad. Yeah, by the way get a rattlesnake bite will kill you Eventually, but it's not like if I got bit by a rattlesnake right now I'd have plenty of time to go to the hospital. Don't stop for lunch. I wouldn't okay unless unless I don't know how big these wings Are gonna be but that's a good point. They're gonna be good tarantula. Absolutely hundred percent Sean Naked mole rats don't need them You're off your ass. That's insane. I can't stand it.

Are you kidding me? I don't like the way they, it's just a tough look. Yeah, it's a tough look, but you get to see it. I don't like it. All right, it's your pick. That's crazy to me. I love seeing those little weirdos. Can't stand it.

It's not their fault. Mandel, your final pick. I feel like we've been having an overall thesis and growing sentiment that we do need I love seeing those little weirdos. Can't stand it. It's not their fault. Mandel, your final pick. And I feel like we've been having an overall thesis and growing sentiment that we do not like animals in zoos that we can see in regular life. That's right. And the greatest example of that was in the,

I can't say this correctly, but I believe, the Sedgwick County Zoo in Wichita, Kansas. Another zoo. Fantastic, fantastic structure. Love the routes that they take you through. However, they did have a white tail deer. No. Oh, God, are you serious?

I was about to take something very close to this. They had two deer in an enclosure, and I said, hey, man. I've talked to the zoo about that. Absolutely not. This is, across the country, zoo about that. Absolutely not. This is across the country. These are very readily available animals. Yeah.

Like to the point where they're leaping in front of cars. People hate them. People want to get rid of them. Absolutely not. Yeah. I'm like why do we have this here? There's no rhinos jumping in front of my car. I don't know if this is worth.

By the way, I could see if you're in like a New York City zoo or something and they had a deer because nobody had ever seen a deer. But in Kansas, they have deer everywhere. I hated it. Yeah, that's rough. It's a great pic. I'm a little stuck here. It's tough to stick to dismount.

It is, this last one. Because I also don't want to say something that's too close to other things we've said. And that's kind of like all I have on my list now. You. Cause I also don't want to say something that's too close to other things we've said. And that's kind of like all I have on my list now. You can't. I don't want to. This is also a good topic because it was a short list. Yeah, it really was.

A lot of times it'll be so many where we're like, all right, this is a short list, this is a tough one. Let me talk through some stuff I was about to take. I was thinking about it. I was thinking, okay, maybe I'm gonna take a frog. Cause sometimes you go to a zoo. I don't like seeing frogs there. I love a frog.

And you got frogs there. And then I thought back to moments I've seen frogs at zoos. I was like, no, I liked a lot of that. Multi-colored frog. They got some weird frogs, too. Bright blue frogs. Or just like those ones. Poison dart.

You get that frog that's as white as a dinner plate. Bullfrogs will like dig into the mud. I didn't know they could do that. I'm into that. I was thinking elk. They got elk at the Oregon Zoo. You can go the elk at the beach. That's not that rare is majestic I'm gonna take something that I think I'm wearing a lot of blow back on but then every time I see it. I'm like Taking the beluga whale

That's it's so cool. I don't again. I don't like it being there. That's I don't like it being there. I've never seen one in real life. I don't like seeing it in a zoo, but it's amazing. Especially when it got that acne. It's not... It's fantastic. They got one at the Point Stevens, or Fort Stevens, whichever one it's called, zoo up in Washington. I see it every time I see it. Like, you never really get a good angle on it. And I'm always just like, hey.

That one at the Atlanta Zoo just came and talked to me, dude. It was great. I think maybe I saw it too early. It's all I can say. I'm just like... That might be it. I saw it early in life. That might be it.

So maybe I'm not thrilled by it. I don't know. It just doesn't do anything for me. Yeah. They were, god damn, the coolest thing I've ever seen. I think this is one of those things where I'm like, like by now if they've heard the serials draft, when does this one come out? After.

After. So this is like a Grape Nuts or more of maybe a Raisin, actually Raisin Bran I think everybody likes. I do not think that's what I think. But with Grape Nuts where I'm like, I see how other people don't like that. But you know, like I think I'm wrong, but I truly believe it in my heart And that's how I feel about the beluga whales. I don't think anyone else is wrong for loving them

I hear you just does not do anything for all you know buddy. That's fair Isaac Almost like I couldn't decide if I wanted to say super producer or your last name Super producer Isaac Lee you can't go on you said the full name. I think it is time for your final book I You know you guys took all the good ones or all the bad ones I suppose the bad ones the tortoise tortoise tortoise tortoise tortoise tortoise. I don't like it I just take them. I don't like the tortoise. It's like slow You ever heard them bone. I will bother the San Diego

I mean we've talked about it when have they have they have sex. It's the funniest thing you'll ever see they scream like old men, right? It's the funniest thing you'll ever see in your life when you see turtles I also like singing tortoise I'm sorry. I love you in the water out of the water Love a big-ass turtle He was gonna say Pavilion up here. I'll take you next time. Is that where you're up in a big room surrounded by butterflies? No, it's like a jungle Situation and they're just all around. Okay, Jacob's been there But you're like if you have a flying all over the place you ever been on a date in Colorado

You've been to it. Are you in the same room as them? I was one. Yeah, you're in there with a yeah That's what I'm saying. Yeah I get that Yeah, that's how I feel about small cats, but that's not what this is about. No, we'll drive small cats later Tortoise was the pick to recap David you went first. You took small fish camouflage bugs, donkeys, elephants, and tarantulas. Sean, you went second, you took la cucaracha, alligators, bats, ostriches,

and the foolish pick of naked mole rats. Mandel, you went third, you took ligers, lions, German shepherds, lemurs, and deer. If you just showed me that list, there's no through line. You couldn't get it. I like that about it. I went last, I took camels, eagles, millipedes, lizards, and under six feet, and beluga whales.

Yeah. We lost some stuff on the board, but not a ton. There's some talent on the board, nothing crazy. I didn't have a lot, I had, so I put a red panda just because they're so elusive. That one in Madison you could see for days. The one in Portland, I've never seen it once It's got a lot of room to operate so that where it's like well

Don't have an animal that is never ever gonna be seen so that yeah You've seen one zebra you've seen them all yeah, I was zebra. I had thought about that I don't like and that's what I was saying earlier horse adjacent. Yeah, horse adjacent can all the petting zoo animals Okeechobee or whatever none of that shit shit, I really, I don't get it. Goats and pigs and shit, I don't, you know, they don't do it much for me. Yeah, I thought about taking some of those petting zoo ones, but I'm like, I see the appeal for the kids.

It is cool, yeah. Yeah. But for me. Because kids want to see animals they can make the noises of. Yeah. Jacob, do you have a zoo animal that we didn't name that you find detestable?

I got one. Mantle's got more. Wait, let me hear. I don't know, like a peacock. Oh, Jacob says a peacock. That's great, that. Oh, that's fantastic. So at the San Francisco Zoo,

they like let them out at the end of the day, and that's how you know you gotta get out of the zoo. And that's pretty fun. There's a place in Portland that has like wild peacocks. There's multiple neighborhoods in Portland. We used to do that show where the neighbor had a peacock. Yellow Hammered, West Van Horn Show. I remember that.

It was like kind of next to downtown. Yeah, his neighbor just had a peacock that would be out. They get loud. If you wanna talk about a loud animal, they fuckin' wail. Yeah. Good job. The one I got is called a, and this was also in the Wichita Kansas Zoo, y'all should check that out

when y'all in Wichita, guys. The red, a red rib, a red rib, a red river hog. A big? They had a hog? Yes, now they had a hog and it's native to Congolian forest. Now, it does- Like Chicago? Yeah, now it does look unique, like it had different hair,

and it was like different color and stuff, so that's why I still give it credit, but at the end of the day, it was a pig, man. It oinked, it sat there. Yes, it was a different color pig, but pig nonetheless. Yeah, yeah, that's a different color pig, but But I didn't put on the list cuz I was this does look different yeah

But it is a pig. Yeah Absolutely. These are all wonderful picks. Yeah, we want to hear yours. Here's a bit all fantasy pot on Twitter all fantasy podcast at gmail.com Shout out to everyone the a fe patreon where you can find the live episodes that we did here at High Plains Comedy Festival with Royce Govel and Adam Cain Holland as well as every other live episode we've done except for the few that we've redacted for Only one safety reasons. Yeah, the Philadelphia episode Uh shout out to everyone the AFE Shaslackety the AFE subreddit. Shout out to everyone. Uh If not, no, no, no other shout out to everyone.

There you go. Somebody want to think of a shout out last night was that at the live show? Shout out to dude IDK for sure. Oh yeah. I it's not in sorry. It's not. It's deep in the DM. I can't find it. We'll get to it. We'll get to it. Super producer Isaac, not on the ones and twos in a chair. She had the super producer Jacob on the ones and twos today. Uh, shout out to who? Brian is what I should. Oh Brian, your man. You may have On the ones and twos in a chair said she had a super producer Jacob on the ones and twos today Shot to who Brian is what I said. Oh Brian your man. You're a chat to Brian Brian and I are gonna go patch this up. I doubt it. I'm going over there dude If you show up that would be so I'm showing up at his door with two smaller dogs You know what's funny? He'd go with it if you're like, hey, man, I'm sorry

He'd be I bet he'd be wouldn't be it. I don't think I think you would absolutely be that kind of guy He would be a dick. He would want to continue the you'd be like, why do you think you can treat people like that? We like that kind of thing move the bike Shout out to Frankie Ocean shot this other dude shot on your beads More important than all that I'm tuning in next week to another brand new episode of AllFamC, everything. Shagla. What?

Would you move this back? That was a hate gum podcast.