And That's Why We Drink - E203 The Abdominal Snowman and Christmas on an Embered Ash

Episode Date: December 27, 2020

Christmastime is here! It's episode 203 and our official holiday episode so whether you celebrate with Elf on a Shelf, Mensch on a Bench, Krampus on the Mantle or Caillou in the Bayou, we're here to bring you some festive cheer! Em takes us into the wintery snowbanks to cover the history of the Yeti, then Christine covers the Christmas crimes of lone outsider Dewey Sham aka the Santa Clause Burglaries. Em also declares Christine dangerously good at bamboozling... and that's why we drink! Please consider supporting the companies that support us! See for yourself why TRUFF is the biggest hot sauce on Instagram and Tik Tok! Get 10% off site-wide when you use promo code DRINK at truff.com. That’s 10% off everything—including White TRUFF VIP box and TRUFF Variety Pack. Just in time for the holidays! Just shop at truff.com and use promo code DRINK.Get a 3-Step Routine for any skin type by visiting glossier.com/podcast/DRINK. For a limited time, new customers can get 10% off your first order.Simply visit athleticgreens.com/DRINK and join health experts, athletes and health conscious go-getters around the world who make a daily commitment to their health every day.Go to HelloFresh.com/drink10 and use code drink10 for 10 free meals, including free shipping! With HelloFresh, you get fresh, pre-measured ingredients and mouthwatering seasonal recipes delivered right to your door. HelloFresh lets you skip those trips to the grocery store, and makes home cooking easy, fun, AND affordable – and that’s why it’s America’s #1 meal kit!

Christmas time is here this is fun welcome to our Christmas episode that's a little bit late but I'm just so excited because when we're recording this it hasn't happened yet welcome to holiday season happy belated hanukkah happy christmas happy just you know life i guess because we're leaving 2020 and i'm so thrilled can we i'm i i have fomo can we also can we do the hasafoie hasafoie the whole both verses can we do it at the same time always yes yes okay one two three go wait it's not your verse okay okay i feel better no one else does but that's okay everyone else feels worse if you're the editor do not worry about trying to line those up they're like i wasn't planning on it but since we're on zoom it's a lot harder for us to know who's saying what at what point allow it allow it to be it's it's chaotic uh

it's to serve its purpose it's chaotic yeah yeah it's like it's like when you sing in um for like row row row your boat you know yes it's around it's around around we should actually call each other sometime and do that privately or we see how many hasafwas we can get through in one round can we do it but not privately we see how many Hossifois we can get through in one round. Can we do it, but not privately? Can we just do it publicly? We'll actually live stream it, so catch you later on Instagram. Everybody's going to leave Patreon. Anyway, hello and welcome.

I'm so excited because we have a holiday episode that I'm forcing onto Em and everybody, my Christmas cheer. I'm very excited, and we're sorry it's two days late but we don't control the calendar so No and we do control our calendar but we're not good at it. That's for sure. Here we are. I wish I had I mean I did literally have so much time to do this and I just absolutely chose not to think about it

until I was sitting right here right now but I wish I had brought in our Krampus on the Mantle which one of our lovely fans gave us it's like an elf on the shelf but just incredibly so much better i also so much have always by the way wanted this and the year that i finally like was able to like buy things target just stopped offering it to me but i really want mensch on a bench so i love mensch on a bench yeah if someone knows where i can find myself a mensch on the

bench i'm i'm in the in the market for a good mensch good mensch i'm in the market for a good mensch not in that way though i think it said very it's a clarifier very fiddler on the roof there of like matchmaker matchmaker i'm yeah i'm in the in the market for a good mensch anyway uh yes happy holidays in general whether you uh you know have an elf on the shelf or a krampus on the mantle or a caillou on the bayou or any of those weird uh a what on the what a caillou on the bayou there's a oh dear there's a there's a trend right now on Twitter where people are making different versions that that rhyme like elf on the shelf yeah yeah sure sure the the big one going around right now is a picture of like Caillou that like

show about that you traumatized me as a like when my sister was little I can't look at it I think Caillou traumatized everyone and a lot of people now as adults are like that kid was fucking terrible like he was really weird i was not into at all no my sister would watch that show and i'd be like please i would literally watch wild kratts anything just get me off of this kaiju business but no here he is back on tiktok it was it was his uh his theme song that was really intoxicating it was don't sing i'm not going to but i remember they made a trap music version of it. And it kind of actually was amazing. My nightmare.

You're going to have to listen to that on the way home. Happy holidays, by the way. Happy holidays. Someone on Twitter said, oh, I love to listen to the show, except my husband hates Christine's laugh or something. Me too. Me too. So whatever.

We're all stuck here. She didn't quite say that. She said, I try to listen to it when we're going to sleep but my husband says christine's laugh wakes him up so he won't let me listen and i'm like well i wonder if my screaming hoss of wall will wake him up so hopefully i did the purpose it did the purpose do you know how many pet owners hate me when i used to talk to geo on here because everyone's dogs would freak out so because everyone likes to tell us when they hate us which is super fun for our psyches anyway you know what your favorite thing to do is humble us and i appreciate that

i know just knock us down a peg so what what have you uh what have you been doing so far do you think where do you think you are in the world on the 27th oh i'm definitely in my home well that's the sad part like my brother was going to come visit for the holidays obviously he had to stay in la which is a real bummer because he's alone out there. I can't see my dad because like, you know, he has his partner that he's with and we just don't want to mix too many people. And it's just tough. So, you know, we're home alone and it's sad. And I know a lot of people out there are as well. So this is probably why I'm overcompensating with my like aggressive yelling cheer. But I mean, Em and your girlfriend's gone. Like it's tough out's gone like yes i can finally

say it now that okay so two weeks ago everyone uh two weeks ago when you were listening to this uh the this podcast i was gonna meet this tv show this podcast whatever it is uh no but uh this podcast i had said on air and then i made our editors cut it out because I didn't want to ruin anything. But Allison went home for Christmas. But we did it the smart way where she went all the way to South Carolina and then quarantined for two weeks before she saw anyone. She didn't want to get anyone sick if she got something at the airport. Then she's spending the time isolated with her family. And then she's flying back to L.A.

And then she's quarantining for another two weeks in our very convenient podcast apartment. And so I'm going five weeks without seeing her. And I guess this will have made three weeks by the time you hear this. So I've been a goddamn mess just staring at walls. And I tried to mention it two weeks ago. But then I realized that she was surprising her parents. And every right, every now and then they get the urge to listen to the podcast. And I was like, wow, I'm totally going to ruin this surprise happen the one day that they shouldn't listen from across the country. I ruined the surprise that their kid is actually

like down the street and has been this whole time. So well, actually, I just realized that's such a bummer because we went on and on about the podcast department and how like, back in like two years ago, or what even probably less than that we were like barely able to afford rent and now we're very privileged enough to have a space that was like going to be our recording studio obviously covid like turned that upside down but that was the intention was that we would record and youtube there etc um but now it's been really fortunate because we have like friends who have either you know needed to find a place to live short term, or like coming or like quarantining or what have you. And so it's been really, really a cool

opportunity to give let people use it, especially since I'm not flying out there. And we went on a whole tangent where I was just saying, like, I'm pretty sure someday this is going to be on a ghost tour, because there's been so much like that's happened in this house with different people going in and out and you and i brought in haunted dolls and a krampus on the mantle and oh my god the tour guide would be like oh and someone quarantined here during the pandemic of 2020 and it really was just like the home for misfit friends because like yes like you said there was one of our friends who like it sounds more tragic than it was but ended up you know thinking they were going to be moving into a new place and it ended up not happening la thing so then they needed a place to

stay until they could find between homes yes they were in between homes someone else needed to stay there um because there was construction going on at their place allison is quarantining it's been so convenient and it's also yes i mean this sounds really bougie and it is and we're very we have a lot of privilege in being able to say this but it's felt nice to be able to offer our friends just a free place to stay yeah and i feel like for so long like i felt like i had to take advantage of not advantage but you know take things from other people who are helping me out when i moved to la giving back was hardcore struggling and so it does feel nice to be able to be like okay we can offer something yeah um especially because it's tough not being able to use it when i'm here it's true it's it really it

makes us feel so much better though like we're paying rent like yeah and that's why we drink is paying rent on a place that we're not even using so now it's like please take this free space like like take our accommodations so it feels very very nice to be able to help out people it does anyway so the whole point i was just gonna to say, one day it's going to be on a haunted tour as like, you know, all these people lived in there. I was saying like Eva's a woman in white and she's going to stand in the doorway. Ghostly cats all over her. Right.

So anyway, I just love that image in my mind that that's what the apartment is becoming. And it's like pretty on brand. Very on brand. I would say like part one of our plan is to like help everyone and be really wonderful and like give that reputation off but then part two you realize it was all for like the shtick of like making it even more haunted in the future like just bringing right exactly bringing a lot of chaos into that place and then yeah and then that way people get more bang for their buck on the tour when it's all haunted and terrible so exactly anyway uh are there any updates

do we have any yes i want you to open your present oh my gosh oh my gosh okay so christine did this thing uh not surprising and uh i guess because we can't be together for the holidays christine we we're doing a separate um gift opening uh by the way so we're gonna be able to give each other presents and we'll find a way we're we're streaming that on patreon i think it might have already come out when this comes out or maybe the same day i'm not sure but we're not sure yet but you'll you'll see about it on the internet i guess but so we're doing a separate gift opening situation however for some reason there's one thing that christine needed me to open today so this got overnighted to me i had to overnight ship it which oops that hurt my wallet.

But I mean, it was worth it. This is just beautiful. If you're following us on YouTube, you can see what this looks like. But it's very like, this is like HGTV packaging. Okay, I'll be honest. I got a cricket. It's so dorky. But I got one of those cricket vinyl cutting machines.

So that's how I made the little gift tag. I'm such a dork. No, it's perfect. I'm going to keep the tag. It's got a little green reindeer on it. And it says my name. And do you know how rarely my name is spelled properly? So well, I try my best to spell your name properly. I'm gonna hold on to this one for as long as I can just so so this is the reason I sent this now is because it was meant to be sent a long time like weeks ago so weeks ago belated oh my i apologize that's okay so uh hopefully you can enjoy it up until christmas until christmas oh my gosh but then after christmas i never look at it again so no well i i uh i have a guess as to

what this is i'm probably wrong but at this point you've just given me enough like traumatic experiences what do you think it is um ptsd tells me that this is just a box of fucking lemons no but i wish that's clever it has nothing to do with lemon i don't believe no it doesn't it does not well okay here we go also i appreciate the buffalo plaid so thank you for that oh good i'm glad i bought that wrapping paper just for you at tarjay very nature cozy um oh my gosh it's something back to the future already i can see marty mcfly's name i hope you don't have one of these already oh christine oh christine you don't have one right no oh my gosh it's a okay wow there's a like okay see why it was supposed to be sent a long time ago i feel okay i see why it was supposed

to be a long time ago for those wondering it is a it's um back to the future it's an advent calendar of back to the future and i'm gonna lose myizzucking mind but also it's Playmobil which is like if you grew up in the 90s it was like the fucking like brand of little knockoff Legos that you played with I'm sure it wasn't knockoff Legos but you know what I'm talking about

it's like a European brand so it's probably a more German thing or yeah it's so funny that first of all thank you this is so cool um also you're gonna have to open like 15 at a time or something later on happily also okay so i guess in everything that you open there's like a new little item and then together it all builds like hill valley which is yeah this is so cool this is so on brand this is so exactly me i was like it's so m that i was worried you already had one i was gonna say that well i didn't know about this one but um i've been

someone recently i don't know who you are but you do know who you are because you tagged me on instagram um but someone tagged me and they found like um a hover like a pillow that was shaped like the back to the future hoverboard and i don't know it must be because like one of the anniversaries for back to the future just came out but target and walmart have been weirdly selling a shitload of back to the future stuff oh and so i've been scouring like both pages and like keeping everything in my cart and they have a lot of like playmobil back to the future stuff that like i've been like it's been in my cart not this one not the advent calendar I didn't know this existed but they've had like little like trinket like fun packs so I've known that Playmobil and Back to the Future did some sort of deal together recently but I didn't know there was

a calendar going on yeah I totally like I was stuck trying to figure out if I should mail it like with your other gifts and then I got I waffled on it too long and then I just overnighted it to you for the episode. Wow. Yeah, somebody, the thing is somebody tagged me in this like in like October or something on Instagram and I was like, don't say a word because I'm gonna buy this for Em right now. And I feel bad I didn't like save their name.

I think a couple of people sent me the link, but they were like, this would be a good gift. And I was like, step aside. Get the fuck away. I have already purchased it. This is so, so cool. And one of the things that I like, this would be a good gift. And I was like, step aside. Get the fuck away. I have already purchased it. This is so, so cool. And one of the things that I like, I can already tell on the back, it shows like some of the items you get out of this. And one of them is, so if you are a Back to the Future fan, you know that there's like a photograph that Marty has of him and his siblings. And throughout the movie, as he gets farther away from like his parents meeting, the kids slowly fade away from the picture.

And, uh, and so I actually have a prop version of the picture where like, if you move it either side, like the, the siblings disappear. There is apparently a Playmobil version of that in here. So it's like literally the same background of like the real picture, but it's a Playmobil version of Marty McFly.

Well, I was staring at the box, like none of this means anything to me but i'm sure em will appreciate oh this is so cool wow i pardon me oh there's the letter oh man okay wow there's so much to oh wow so this is something you can do before al gets back to to occupy your time oh i'm gonna it's gonna get real dangerous on my instagram i'm gonna be posting a lot of weird stuff they i part of me wants to be like oh i'll just save this until next christmas but i don't i know for a fact i don't have that in me no yeah i i almost did that but then i was like i can't i need to send it i will say if this exists next year i am not opposed to getting the same gift twice and like reopening everything so and like starting from day one yeah i felt that i

hope i didn't like ruin the first half no oh my god i'm sending it so late okay now i literally get to open like 15 gifts in a row oh no poor me it's like every kid's dream of the advent calendar like you just get to open them all at once oh man well it's perfect because half of them i get to open right away and half of them i have to be patient on that's true that's true that's a great fucking gift that was that's very on brand thank you oh my gosh of course i was like don't tell em i'm buying this whoever you are uh so thank you for keeping keeping your cool and not giving up the secret oh no that no it was well thank you to whoever brought that into your mind well i'm so happy you like it i'm sorry it was so frenetic and i was like bring it to cast well

it was in this like really like wild box too that was like completely dented up and it said like open at cast that's why i had to make the inside look more like hgtv status you know with my vinyl cutter it really uh it was metaphorical for like i'm a disaster on the outside but on the inside that's right just you wait yeah we had that conversation um can i say one last thing before we start really briefly yes i like i know this is a long intro but my story's super short so um yeah first of all can our first note be so sorry for the four hour podcast what did we do i don't know what happened i have what did we do i we really you guys gave us permission to start doing longer episodes and we really ran

with it and we're talking to our listeners like you you guys were like oh no it's good when you're do long episodes and like that was careful what you wish for i we never thought after the 200th episode we would ever do an episode longer than that and then the very next episode or something was like just bananas so bad oh my god it was so long it must have been john benet ramsey maybe because that was like it was it was yeah oh my god oh it was bad so i'm sorry the entire recording it was i mean it was bananas yeah it was bad so mine today is like ultra short to make up for it but um i just want to make one final note here speaking of gifts and mail is that like so i i opened or i started like a um a mailbox here in cincinnati because you and i have one in la but like i just wanted to a mailbox here in Cincinnati because you and I have one in L.A.

But like I just wanted to have one here in case I needed to like order anything or for Beach Juice Andy or what have you. And like I didn't it's just on my website, but I didn't expect people to really like use it. But I've gotten some like really, really sweet mail and cards. And I think a lot of them are both like one sent to the L one and once i hear which i'm like wow they're doing like double the work um but like i got this like hodag postcard oh that's fine and there's stuff i got a while back that i don't have like on me right now but like i got this little krampus car creepy krampus card um from becca and then okay you're gonna hold on so then this is um from laura little christmas cards and and

becca like holiday cards and it made me feel so special because i'm in my new house and like i'm getting holiday mail and it just feels really nice look at this oh that is uh the constitution it looks like yeah with a wax seal it's from my gosh and apparently greg hand wrote this and then sent one to the la mailbox oh my gosh oh my god that's a lot of work oh my gosh but it's a really nice card and then finally i have two gifts that were sent to me which i was so shocked that people sent me like little presents but m i think you'll appreciate so first off ashley made these um there's a thank god those got sent not here i know i think they're like i know better than to send it to him.

It's a little lemon crocheted and a little avocado. And they're just the cutest. And the lemon, as you can see, is dirty because he went missing. And it turns out Moony likes to carry objects around the house like he's a friggin squirrel. Now your pets are also falling in love with lemon. Yeah, he hid it in the fireplace. So maybe he's not falling in love. Maybe he wants to destroy lemon. I summoned my own thoughts into moonshine he literally carried it into the fireplace and

dropped it behind some logs and i was like where did that lemon go and it was on the kitchen counter it wasn't like it was on the floor so uh moonshine and i were like build a fire tonight build a fire tonight please set light the fire um and then another ashley uh sent me that okay and this is going to be your favorite thing let me why didn't it get sent to me no because because you'll you'll understand in a moment so this was sent from ashley um whose daughter also whose 10 years 10 year old daughter listens to the show which was super cute and um so ashley she was shopping online and and was just listening to the episode where you called me classy trash and found this shirt. Hold on.

This is wearing it today. Keep it classy and a little trashy. You know what? That it's wearing the headband. That's what I thought. OK, so then I was completely correct on my aesthetic then because. Yes, you were. I don't feel as bad anymore because clearly other people think classy trash equals that weird ass headband you've started wearing.

It's a raccoon wearing like a bowed headband. And it says keep it classy and a little trashy. And I was like, M is literally spot on, I guess. I'm pretty sure I'm a fashionista. Okay, now you're taking it too far. Move over, Tyra Banks. I got something to say. Hang on.

Ashley, look what you've done. But anyway, so I just like cracked up at the shirt and i was like i have to show em on the show so it makes me feel it i feel um justified and heard and seen so thank you i appreciate i feel acknowledged that like what i had to say actually stood for something so it worked yeah so and ashley uh hi to you and your daughter who's 10 which is so sweet and i'm sorry if we swear too much uh and anyway that's all i just wanted to point out everybody and i've gotten mail a couple you know months and weeks ago but i that i don't have on me but thank you to everyone who sent mail it like makes me feel really happy that's all um yeah and did you want to shout out the the address

oh no i mean well it's on our website you can just go there okay i don't know about offhand anyway okay well um and no pressure to mail anything obviously i just was like so shocked that people actually went and found it can i do a caveat though if it is like specifically and that's why we drink related it probably should come to the la one otherwise next time we're together and can open guess christine's gonna have to put them on a suitcase to bring them to la for us to open together yeah so i open the ones that are sent to me because a lot of times they're just like either lemon or like literally people have mailed me like open all the goddamn lemons you want yeah so i usually open so if it's like something that you don't but if it's for the patreon video specifically yes yeah i don't open them on air

so yeah if it goes to the and that's where you drink one in la that's where we open our um our patreon fan mail stuff so yes uh cool well your turn okay so here because it's christmas i wanted to do a christmas story but here's the thing really like after krampus you really can't top it so I kind of just went with like a wintry situation in general which feels a little more um non-denominational anyway than like yes Santa or something so agreed um so I'm doing just kind of a winter a winter adjacent cryptid so okay this is the uh the story not really this is uh information on the yeti um i can't believe you haven't done the yeti yet oh my gosh me either um i also so originally i was going to i was thinking like okay well like wintery maybe i should do like

the abominable snowman apparently they are the same thing so yeah i thought so i always thought they were different things in my head i don't know why um i mean they have different names it's kind of like how sasquatch and bigfoot in my head are the same thing but apparently they're very different oh my gosh i can't keep track of these cryptids me either they're they all and they all basically look the same they're just different colors so uh this is the yeti slash abominable snowman which i learned by the way uh i don't know how to spell Abominable and I never will. Every time I tried, it was just a different wrong version. So that's a fun fact about me now.

The red squiggle just wouldn't disappear. It wouldn't go away. I was like, what vowel is wrong here? And then at one point it was Abdominal Snowman. I was like, I'm done. Abdominal. I can't figure it out. um and then at one point it was abdominal snowman i was like i'm i'm done i can't figure it out so uh if you are wondering where have i might maybe seen the yeti in my lifetime on in pop

culture at the very least well here you have probably seen the yeti slash abominable abdominal snowman um on scooby-doo uh doctor who and monsters. I think the sequel of Monsters, Inc. Also the claymation Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer. My personal favorite is the segment on Looney Tunes where the Abominable Snowman finds Daffy Duck and thinks that he's a rabbit and names him George. Do we know what that is? No, I don't remember that at all. I'm pretty sure it's arguably one of the more famous Looney Tunes clips, if you will. Really? Mm-hmm. I don't remember that at all i'm pretty sure it's like arguably one of like the more famous looney tunes like clips if you really but it's like he remember that like daffy duck is wearing like a little pink hat and it makes them have like almost bunny ears and then uh the abominable

snowman finds him and is like i love you very much i am going to name you george and i will love you forever and like it's daffy duck George and I will love you forever. And like, it's Daffy Duck trying to get away from the abominable snowman. Okay. I used to listen. I used to watch it a lot when I was a little kid. So it's just kind of like lasered into my brain, but that's my personal favorite reference of the Yeti.

So, so what, who, who is, who is the Yeti? Christine asks. And here's my answer to that. The Yeti slash abominable snowman is the Yeti, Christine asks, and here's my answer to that. The Yeti slash Abominable Snowman is a mysterious bipedal creature in the mountains of Asia, usually the Himalayas, is where like 90% of the stories come from.

The Yeti is muscular, surprisingly dark gray or reddish brown which i always think of oh that it is white um but apparently the white is just like snow iced onto the fur which checks out um and allow it oh makes sense for like a creature that maybe doesn't exist um and the creature is known to be anywhere between two or four hundred pounds um it is apparently shorter than uh bigfoot uh the size ranges from like six to eight feet depending on who you talk to okay and i think it's not too big i think bigfoot is on average like 10 feet oh so for cryptozoologists yetis are they're apparently just considered like the more asian branch of the sasquatch family so even though sasquatch is much bigger they think it's probably some sort of cousin of sasquatch that is only

found in asia okay um there when people try to figure out the etymology or like how the the term yeti came to be there are a few thoughts the main ones are that it is a combination of different sherpa words um yeti is a combination probably of ya which is rock or cliff and then te which means animal so like a rock animal oh or cliff animal um and sherpa by the way is like a group that's native to like the mountains and like nepal um so yeti could also come from like old sanskrit and it could be it could come from the word yak yak sha or yak sha which means a hairy being with superhuman strength which sounds about right yeah that one fits yeah it checks out and then also a lot of people have also said that it might

actually not have been the word yeti originally but was the word meti with an m and okay it apparently in some languages or in certain dialects that means bear um so different theories on where the name came from all big hairy is is kind of the big hairy thing yes big hairy thing so uh one of the more popular stories of the yeti uh they all more or less date back to like sherpa folklore and one of the more popular stories from that time is the sherpa and the snowman um and so this is an excerpt from that long ago there was a beast in our mountains known as the tlo mung meaning in our language mountain savage yikes it's cunning and it's cunning and ferocity uh were so great as to be a match for anyone who encountered it. It also always outwit our hunters with their bows and arrows.

It was said to live alone or with a very few of its kind. And it went sometimes on the ground and sometimes in the trees. Or it was sometimes on the ground, sometimes in the trees. Although it was made very much like a man, it was covered with long, dark hair and was more intelligent than a monkey, as well as being larger. It was covered with long, dark hair and was more intelligent than a monkey, as well as being larger. The people, as the people came in and more in numbers, the mountain savage disappeared. But many people say they are still found in the mountains of Nepal, away to the west, where the Sherpa people call them Yeti. In pop culture, the Yeti is just known to be like this big, massive, like shaggy eight man hybrid with huge feet. And some people also attribute like saber teeth, saber tooth, saber like teeth.

I don't know how to phrase that. Saber like teeth. I was like saber tooth snowman. Okay. And a lot of people, again, think that it's white or gray, but apparently we are all wrong there. And it is known to be aggressive. Apparently it throws rocks at villagers and has been known to like abduct children. Oh, I was gonna say, well, the Bigfoot is known to throw rocks, but I think abducting children is pretty next level.

Yeah, this one. He really doesn't like to be bothered, apparently. No. So apparently, according to the Sher sherpas this is the official definition or the official description of a yeti is six to eight feet with a cone-like scalp pointed ears a harness chest area i don't know what that means um a human-like face and a bad temperament and they have superhuman strength and the ability to carry off yaks and even abduct children which i like how it's not they have the ability to carry off children and even like carry off yeah they should be switched

like abducting children is something humans can do so yeah i can't carry off a yak like with one arm apparently that's the less impressive part of that oh my god um sherpas have mysterious footprints in the snow um and apparently since they're known to like eat yaks there have also been a surprising number of yak incidents or yak killings uh reported in the area so that no i don't really know it could just be like they don't actually link to each other but they're using it as an excuse for oh well there's clearly yeti in the area um the yeti will here are two things these are two contradictory facts that i found from different websites and i don't know which one's true but i just thought i'd say both of them i'll pick which one's true okay i like that

game yes okay so one of them is that the sherpa will only show itself to people who believe in it. Oh, like a fairy. Okay. Like a fairy. But also that any man who sees the face of a Yeti will die. Okay. Well, that seems. But if that was true, then why would anyone want to believe in the Yeti and like. Okay, but maybe.

Okay, wait. Here, I got it. Maybe you don't want to believe it, but you do. Like you don't want to believe there are demons. That's true. But you do. And so the more you think about like a demon, the more likely it is to be drawn to you and then you die or like even people who are like i don't want to think about aliens because they know i'm thinking about them exactly which is me in the shower every day we're not like wait a second

i'm alone and i'm going to be abducted by aliens please god not while i'm naked i mean i mean i mean i think it makes sense but okay uh okay that checks out so it could be both it's just like you're really unfortunate if you do see one but also like there's no way to know right because because whoever saw the face would die and like if you believe it and you see it and die then it's like nobody can check out your story yeah ah i wonder if that's a like um if that's kind of built upon itself in the legend of like because so few people have seen one maybe they just said like oh they must have died when they saw him it's like the perfect loophole because like you can't prove it you can't disprove it

that's your okay you i'm glad we played that game because you really managed that well listen i'm a genius oh i can't even say it with a straight face um so apparently there's different types of sherpa one is called the chudi which uh they prey on goats sheep and yaks and then there's the mite m-i-t-e mite mite and they attack animals but also sometimes humans so if you're gonna humans so if you see a yeti you have to hope that you're seeing judy because apparently they don't eat human beings got it okay um and the actual the coined term abominable snowman uh that term came to be in like i think 1921 and there was a journalist named henry newman who created this term and actually created it this is a fun fact created it by accident it was like he did not mean to call this creature an abominable snowman oh um so what a very specific word to create by a name to create

by accident truly well so uh henry newman was a journalist and he was interviewing um an expedition like a hunt uh expedition of hunters uh hunters i think they were actually mountain climbers every every story was like either hunters or mountain climbers who all find these uh who find sure people are in the mountains for some ungodly reason they're doing something there and it's there's not too much you can do they're probably pretty cold okay and they're got it and uh so he was interviewing um a group that had just come back from an expedition and they said that they found these really like wildly large footprints um and i guess these footprints were quote probably caused by a large loping gray wolf which in the soft snow formed double tracks rather than those of a barefooted man so they didn't look human and they were wildly large um and i guess the group they couldn't figure

out what these tracks were but you know when you're climbing through that area you have a sherpa with you at all times to guide you through and so uh i think that's why a lot of this ends up being like sherpa folklore because whatever people see usually their sherpa guide that's with them is there to kind of influence what the story how the story goes got it makes sense so um they saw these massive tracks and their sherpa on this expedition said that it was probably tracks from the wild man of the snows oh oh don't worry that's just tracks from the wild man of the snow it's fine it's like we've never had to discuss him up until right now but yeah i'm sorry did i not tell you we're far from home but just know like

the wild man in the snow is nearby. He's been here. That's like when Blaze and I went on that freaking jaguar. Yes. I was thinking the same thing. Oh my God. At like one in the morning. What was the homie's name? Wasn't his name M or something? His name was M. Yes. How wild is that? You're, you're, wouldn't it? Maybe not your Sherpa literally, but your guide through all of that name was M. Who, by the way, I like how both M's are like, yeah by the way there's a couple jaguars don't worry yeah and much much like my my m this m carried an umbrella around as a fucking weapon okay it's like don't worry i got it if someone broke into my house an umbrella

is one of the top three things i would grab i know i was like this is pretty spot on but we got in this freaking jungle and it was me blaze and then an elderly couple and uh this guy named m and he was like oh don't worry uh well he was like well we have to be really careful and quiet and like i hope we don't see a jaguar we were like wait you hope we don't see one i thought this is like an expedition a nighttime expedition to see a jaguar and he was like oh yeah but like we hope to not see one because they're extremely dangerous and they're always watching from the trees and they're extremely violent and the odds of making it out alive and we were like wait wait wait wait why did we sign up for this he's like well you signed a

waiver but the real the real question christine is why did you sign up for that though when you were like let's go on an expedition to go see jaguars you know me right like you know that this is a thing where i would go cool i'm gonna do it and then drag blaze into the woods and then he he would go if someone why have you done if someone was trying to promote to me like hey you should come on this tour where at night we go out into the wilderness and we find jaguars i would be like hmm no thank you blaze really was like hey in the middle of the night um there's some like wild pythons and bears and lions and they're all free just scurrying around you want to take a walk through the woods no i do not no i can see you so and he would he'd be like okay every time a branch snapped he would literally be we had to teach us how to form

a group so that like we would be able to look like a larger animal so it wouldn't attack and i was like oh my god and he's like well don't worry it will just attack the slowest person and this elderly couple was like wait a minute like we didn't get any warning oh my god i was like i'll probably be the slowest person let's be honest um i mean to be fair they would definitely stand a chance at survival because when it comes to like flight or fright i'm freeze and so i would just true true true i would just stand there and be like you know what jaguars i fucking literally asked for this i didn't know my honeymoon and my funeral were going to be the same event but here we are i know and we'll have a great episode to cover uh anyway that just reminded me because we literally

got out of the jeep in the middle of the night in this jungle preserve i would have been like uh you go out and then i would lock the doors after they step outside he was like shaking he was like really scared and i was like why on earth are we doing this like you're more scared than i am yeah that tour guide wow okay i don't think blaze will ever forgive me for that so you know i feel like in your lifetime there's nobody that knows you that doesn't forgive you for something like there's always something there's nobody that knows you that doesn't forgive you for something. There's always something. There's something in each of your relationships where people can't quite trust you anymore. With Blaze, it's only two.

It's the time I took him out of the Jaguar Hut and the time that I ordered a large pool to our house and pretended like I had asked the landlord. And then it arrived and the landlord was like, no, you cannot do this. And Blaze was like, you told me the landlord said it was okay. And I was like, did I? And he's never forgiven me for that either. You know, I can't think right now of a time where I have lost my trust in you, which makes me more nervous because now every day that passes by, I'm closer to the time. It's another opportunity. It's like, I know it's coming. Like once it happens, I can be like, at least that's done with.

I can push the envelope a little further with you every day. Every day. I live in fear. So I'm, it's, it's gotta be some Ouija board experience that I've forced you to do. It's going to be something really stupid that I can confirm. Uh,

anyway, sorry. I don't know where we are anymore. Oh yes. The wild man of the snow, which sure, sure, sure,

sure, sure. Uh, so yeah, so they were like, where, what are these foot? Where are these tracks from?

And the Sherpa said, Oh, it's probably the wild man of the snow. Apparently in their language, sure sure uh so yeah so they were like where what are these foot where are these tracks from and the sherpa said oh it's probably the wild man of the snow apparently in uh their language wild man of the snow translate translates to mezzo kong me mezzo mezzo kong me okay um mezzo means unwashed and kong me means man bear or snowman so oh my i think originally it was their way of saying like unwashed man bear or like dirty bear or something love it love it um so that was the original phrase and as so henry newman was asking him about this and when he wrote it all down he mistranslated it so he used the wrong phrases where instead of dirty he used the word abominable and instead of man bear he used the other translation which was snowman so very specific like alternate words dirty man to our

dirty bear to abominable snowman wow i guess mezzo the o in that because m-e-t-o-h apparently uh he accidentally put a c where the o is or something and so he's not very good at this i see he i think he was like writing quick and the o didn't fully close in his handwriting so he later wrote it as a c and then that changed the wording completely so wow how fun anyway that's how the the term abominable snowman happened it was poor journalism yeah Yeah, well, okay, got it. Makes sense to me. It makes sense to me too. So here, this is another excerpt. This is from a research named Myra Shackley who was reporting on two hikers in the 40s

when they saw actually multiple abominable snowmen walking together. So this is in the point of view of the hikers. The height was not much less than eight feet their heads were described as squarish and the ears must lie close to the skull because their because there was no projection from the silhouette against the snow what an oddly specific observation of like well i didn't see your ears poking out in your shadow so you must have some tiny ears that sounds like someone with big ears talking yeah this is someone compensating for their big ears sounds like someone who's used to seeing

their own ears in the shadows um their the shoulders sloped sharply down uh to a powerful chest covered by reddish brown hair which formed a closed body fur mixed with long straight hairs hanging downward it was busy grubbing up roots and occasionally emitted a loud high-pitched cry. In 1957, so I think 15 years later, there was an American writer named George Moore who, I don't know if he was actually, I think he was like a mountain climber, but he ended up writing an article called I Met the Abominable Snowman, A True Story.

And it was about his own expedition in Nepal. I love when people write a true story because then you know it's true. Based completely in reality. On facts only. And so this was in 1957. His name was George Moore. And this is an excerpt from his personal experience. Tell me how much of this sounds like me

or how much of this I would describe you as. Ready? Okay, great. You already know it's going to be terrible. 100% already, yep. A hideous face thrust apart the wildly thrashing leaves and gaped at us. I shall not forget the faces.

Grayish skin, beetle black eyebrows, a mouth that seemed to extend from ear to ear, and long yellowish teeth that were nerve shattering. But those eyes, those beady yellow eyes that stared at us with obvious demonical cunning and anger. That's the Christine I know. Demonical. That face is also says, which is what I say every time I see you. Oh, no, that dewy face with the perfect eyebrows. Um, weird ideas were beginning to force their way into my mind, perhaps, but no, Oh, no. Not again. That dewy face with the perfect eyebrows. Weird ideas were beginning to force their way into my mind.

Perhaps, but no. Damn it. It has to be. This was the Abominable Snowman. One thing is certain. Whatever science will someday discover, the creature humankind has called the Abominable Snowman is there in the Himalayan Heights. I know, and I met it there. Sounds like he had, like, voice to text on. He's like, wait damn it he's like not realizing if he did voice to text today he would you'd also

see like part of his like grocery list in there he'd be like cabbage no no no lettuce lettuce oh no the abominable snowman ronda i hate cabbage or you'd see like his uh his uh his own thinking while he's driving like that fucker came out of nowhere so true story the most famous yeti hunter is a mountaineer named reinhold mesner um apparently he's like the yeti go-to guy he apparently saw one in the 80s in the himalayas. And he has returned often to try to find another Yeti. He leads a lot of expeditions out there. And apparently it's pretty common for expeditions in this area to be specifically to go Yeti hunting

or Yeti searching. That's kind of fun. Yeah. I mean, if I'm going to go climb a mountain with potential promise of a cryptid, I'm more likely to climb that mountain. For sure. So Mesner's theory is that the Yeti is just a combination of a bear and also like the

exaggerated folklore about like wild animals in the area. So it's just like a really dramatic bear, like a Gemini. Like, yeah, both of us with beady eyes. With beady eyes. The Yeti has become a symbol in certain areas. So like it's now become almost a logo or a mascot for the area. And a lot of their companies have to do with the Yeti. There's like a Yeti hotel. There's a Yeti airport or a Yeti airline or something. Yeti hotel. Isn't that fun? Also,

speaking of like, I want to change my honeymoon up and go there next time. Yeah, now you can basically do the Jaguar thing all over again again except now you're climbing up a mountain uh speaking of the yeti hotel um which by the way is a luxury hotel oh hell yeah i want nothing less from a yeti hotel so apparently all the other when it's not like in the himalayas. The big place that people see the Yeti is in Russia. And so Siberia has also made the Yeti kind of one of its mascots. And they have their own museum slash hotel slash park. It's all one like compound. Specifically for tourists to go hunting for Yetis while they're there.

And I think it's like a Yeti themed like hotel and museum and shit. And if you were to catch a Yeti while you're there, there is a $30,000 reward. To catch one? To catch one. Because they're still looking for evidence of its existence.

Okay, but don't like hurt it, right? Like they don't want you to like shoot it. I don't know. There weren't any real specifics to it. But I will say that the Nepalese government, this isn't specifically in Siberia, but the government in Nepal and the U.S. together have, of course, the U.S. would get its fucking hands on this.

They have regulated Yeti hunting now where you need special permits if you wanted to hunt Yetis. And I assume that makes sense. To be fair, it makes sense the U.S. got involved because I'm'm sure the u.s is like the only place where tons of people go i'm gonna go shoot a yeti now exactly okay that checks our tourists are the problem yeah they were like hmm american tourists who like guns ah i have just the things so they have there's like three rules basically where if you're an american you want to go to uh if you want to go looking for yeti in the area you have to have special permits because especially because you're like not a citizen of that area um oh you're not allowed to kill but i guess you're allowed to shoot and harm i don't understand and any evidence of a

yeti must be handed over to Nepalese authorities. Okay. Because I guess they are still desperately looking for proof that this thing even exists. So they're like, look, if you with your guns think you can help us out here, go for it. Okay. So far, though, there hasn't been any concrete evidence proving that the yeti exists originally i was gonna uh jot down a bunch of different situation or a bunch of different events where they thought that they found a lot of dna or they thought that they caught something but if i'm really summing it up every single time they've ever

caught something it ended up being like an animal with mange or which is weird because mange means that it's hairless and this thing is covered with fur maybe it meant like it was like patchy hair maybe you're like really tough hair or something yeah um and anytime starting in like 2011 they've tried to do like dna analysis i know in 2013 there was like 40 specimens that were all suggested to be yeti whoa dna every single one of them came back as like normal animals um except for two of them which came back as literally a himalayan brown bear um and then in 2017 they did the same thing with even more specimens and it all came back as animals we already knew i'm glad you didn't tell me everyone because i would i would have literally gotten my hopes up

about every single one and been convinced i had a hunch that that might happen so i was like i'm just not gonna even be a tease um but most of the dna has come back as common animals like literally cows and dogs and things like that um others have been more specifically uh different strands of bear that are only found in that area so it kind of really strongly proves that like okay they're just bears from far away right um and also those bears happen i think all bears can i'm not a bear expert shockingly but at least these bears can like walk on their hind legs so a lot of people think they're like oh okay so it's just you see one on it's yeah it's humanoid that's it looks like it's bipedal yeah um and then uh any animals that have been

actually captured there was uh one that was a very large cat which somehow was walking on its hind legs which is kind of terrifying to me um or a dremo which i don't know if that's just a word in that area and it translates to something else here but it's basically um like some sort of bear hybrid okay um people have also thought that like one of the i guess at a year like i'm sure hundreds of years ago if not thousands of years ago there was one bear that slowly evolved into two different types of bears and one was like the himalayan brown bear and a polar bear and so some people think that i think though i i'm probably butchering this but my understanding of it was that those two bears came from the same original bear and now that those two bears

are separate species if they bred together and had a polar bear, brown bear hybrid, it could almost look something like the Yeti. But there's no official documents of those bears ever having hybrid babies. Okay. But a lot of people think like if it's a very specific type of bear in that area, their thought is like, oh, maybe it's like some hybrid of the two that originally came from that space. Interesting. Okay. like some hybrid of the two that originally came from that space. Okay.

So yetis have been seen in Nepal, Russia, India, and China mainly. But Nepal and Russia seem to be like the two big ones. And then I'll get to a couple of fun facts. Actually, I'm going to get to only fun facts now. Yay! There's one guy named justin anderson and he made a list called 10 things you should know about yetis and that seemed pretty fun buzzfeed.com okay got it i think justin was uh like auditioning for buzzfeed um because here are some of them uh so earlier when i gave the description of like sherpas say that it's like

so and so tall and it's got this color hair and all this. Apparently, here's a fun fact, Sherpas or some Sherpas at least also believe that the Yeti's feet point backwards so that it helps it walk up mountains easier. Oh, creepy. Which is just absolutely the worst. I would think you're worse. I would think your knees have to go backwards. Right? That's just whatever way. It all bad it's just it's also bad it's also bad uh so thank you justin for that horrifying thought another thing uh here's my arguably my favorite fact is that apparently yeti female yetis are known to be uh very hmm well endowed in their in their chest area and uh so well endowed that

gravity is no friend to them and they hang further than their waist oh their poor backs their poor backs um so apparently when they run it is commonplace which i'm sure there's like a whole three reports of this ever existing but it's apparently so widely understood that uh female yetis like a continental soldier throw them right over their shoulders and like a continental soldier uh oh my god and that's when they run they just toss them over just so they're not flopping around and weighing them down Toss them over just so they're not flopping around and weighing them down. Wow. So if you were to try to outrun a Yeti, particularly a female Yeti, if you run downhill because she's top heavy, you have a better chance of outrunning the Yeti.

But also you have to remember the feet are backwards and now the boobs are backwards. Oh, shit. So it's like this is such a weird image. She's like slowly. And then one day her head will spin around too. Her slowly just becoming in the the reverse of herself oh my god apparently also the male yetis like the fur on their forehead if they're running downhill the wind will put it in their eyes and then they can't see where they're going so your best chance of outrunning any yeti is if you go downhill apparently good because my my chances of running uphill are zero percent so i guess that's if my options were i'm on a mountain and a serial killer says i will not kill you if you can sprint up this mountain i would say guess what

you're about to have a really active day because you're my cruel world a lot of a big active day of killing me because i'm not even going to try running up this fucking hill. Okay, next. Okay, so apparently in 1974, there was a girl who was grazing her yaks when a Yeti attacked her and killed all five animals by smashing their heads in. Yikes. And left her alone?

No, knocked her out cold. And later when she woke up and tried to describe the Yeti to people, she said that the Yeti had black hair and not just backwards feet, but backwards fingers. woke up and tried to describe the yeti to people uh she said that the yeti had black hair uh and not just backwards feet but backwards fingers oh god this thing is just getting worse and worse just keeps inverting on itself how how do fingers become backwards what does that i guess they bend the other way which is just the worst hey guess what i hated all of that. That was fucking terrible.

Oh my God. Another one in 1977 is apparently there was a man who was kidnapped by a female Yeti. And then he reappeared three years later saying that he had had relations with the Yeti. Uh oh. They had twins and the Yeti killed the daughter but their son stayed in the village and every yeti that you now see in that area is a descendant of that yeti human hybrid that's now he's saying he's like the grandfather of exactly yeti yes okay great good for you guy yeah excellent congrats sure thing sure thing um also uh that man later also reported they were like so what did you do for three years while you were with this Yeti?

And apparently all they ever did was throw rocks and eat frogs. Oh, okay. What a life. Sounds like a five-year-old's dream. It does. Let me see. Let me see. Let me see.

Okay. So that's just some of them from the Justin Anderson listicle. But I also wanted to say you can see a yeti yourself at the animal kingdom at disney world on the ride expedition everest um originally the so basically you're like on a train and you're climbing everest and at some point you see like this animatronic yeti so it is currently in the last few years it's just like a standalone does not move uh robot it used to be an animatronic but then apparently it was so the arm the arm used to come kind of swinging at the roller coaster that was supposed to be like the scary part of like the abominable snowman was going to like punch you in the face

and uh apparently it was like either built improperly something about the structure where the arm was like slowly like falling away when it would move so they just the imagineers just stopped it all together so now it just is sitting there and like almost like fingers kept inverting and they were like this is too terrifying like it was scary enough when it was gonna punch you but when the fingers turned some people when they take that ride the yeti is facing them and other times their belly is like facing the other direction everything just keeps twisting nightmare uh but yeah so apparently you can see a non-moving yeti on that ride now and i guess because it's like pre-punch it looks like it's waving with a fist or something how great for it uh so also speaking of imagineers which by the way have i ever told you there was

nothing i ever wanted more in my life than to become an imagineer when i was a kid you have not but that doesn't surprise a fact doesn't surprise me at all. You'd be great at that. When I was little, one of my biggest, like, first of all, there was, I had a few big tasks I planned to accomplish when I got to be an adult. None happened. Free radio show? No? Well, I did when I was a kid.

I did want to grow up to be a ghost hunter. So, like, we're almost there. I was going to say, you've done a lot of cool shit that I think a kid would dream of. Yeah. Well, my two big things where I wanted to be a spy and I wanted to be a, my mom told me I would die immediately. So I gave up on that dream.

Well, she wasn't entirely wrong. I won't even walk, walk up a mountain. So she's probably right. And then the other thing is i wanted to design roller coasters so when i that's a good one i thought that was going to be so fun like a design like sets of like amusement parks and stuff and um but apparently you have to have degrees in animation

and have gone to architecture school and i was like that sounds like a lot of fucking work it sounds like a lot of engineering yeah so imagineering yeah so and i remember watching one time like some old documentary about how they designed like the robots for like the Little Mermaid ride or something. And I was just like so enamored with it. Anyway, I will always be jealous of Imagineers because it's like the one really, really big thing I just never got to do. Well, the only thing we have in common in that respect is I also wanted to be a spy. And I like carried a notebook around and would like write like Harriet the Spy and would write everything down but I did work at a PI company as an investigator so I guess sort of yeah I imagine a lot of spies actually have a much more boring job than we think but I

wanted to be like the spy kids so yeah yeah same same same I had like all the little die I had like all the little gadgets back then were like yes but like your headphones on and you had like a sonar and you could listen to something louder and I would spy on my parents and then I would like all the little gadgets back then where like you put like your headphones on and you had like a sonar and you could listen to something louder. And I would spy on my parents. And then I would like the night vision goggles where you could like decode things. Yeah. I had like those journals where it was like invisible

and like you couldn't see what it said and you had a certain code that you had to say into it. Oh my God, I was obsessed. And I was convinced I was a spy, by the way. I was convinced that nobody even saw me in those night vision goggles. I know, you were just stumbling around. And my dad would a spy, by the way. I was convinced that nobody even saw me in those night vision goggles. I know. You were just stumbling around.

And my dad would be like, go to bed. Yeah, I would be like spying on my parents. And they'd be like, OK, sign the divorce papers. And I was like, this isn't as fun as I thought it would be. Sorry, mom and dad. That's the saddest, but also most accurate. That was entirely right there, a mood. i felt that it was so real and accurate and the worst part is when you take off the spy the spy thing and you can hear it because they're

yelling so you're like i don't even need those headphones i can hear it through the doorway someone out there who grew up in like a really like healthy well-adjusted family and allison oh allison is probably listening right now going oh like that's really so much sadder than you realize but i'm over here like i totally get it that's blaze is like i've met your family i don't doubt this for one second anyway sad story you know you're from a broken childhood when you wanted to be a spy and you would practice by listening to your parents argue yeah oh yeah i mean it really taught both of us well i think like in the most fucked up way but like memory all alone okay uh oh yeah animal kingdom the happiest place on earth whoops right so there's one imagineer apparently named joe road r-o-h-d-e and uh has this like personal mission joe does to teach others about the

yeti in any way possible and you can at him on twitter uh you can find joe road at twitter and ask him any question you want about yetis whether it's like simple yes or no questions or about like the disney maintenance of that ride um wait is it about just that Yeti or like Yetis in general? I'm not sure but I bet you could take your chances and roll that dice. Because I have more questions about the boobage. I also have more questions. And I don't want him to be like freaked out by my presence, you know? I think we as a team

could probably reach out to him and just see what he has to say. I think he would probably block us both, but we could try it. Wow, that would not be the first time someone blocked us on Twitter, right Christine? Nope, certainly not. Move on, move on move on on buzzfeed there is a definitive ranking of monsters by a buzzfeed writer named katie heaney and apparently yeti breaks uh ranks second just behind bigfoot and uh because apparently the yeti is basically Bigfoot in snow. Love it.

So this is the quote. I don't mean that to be dismissive. One could also say that the Bigfoot is Yeti without snow, but the Abominable Snowman suggests that it is meaner than Bigfoot or at least severely misunderstood, and it's even harder to see, which makes it the perfect monster, which I think is a fair argument of like, oh, it's Bigfoot, but even more difficult to track down. Yep. So more fun facts alexander the great actually demanded to see a yeti when he conquered the indus valley in 326 bc um okay and the locals said that they couldn't give him that experience because apparently yetis didn't live in that low of an altitude which like way to cover your own

ass because if you imagine if alexander the great conquers an area and then is like here's my one request and you're like yeah no can do get me a mermaid uh-oh what do we do um but so apparently they they denied that request real quick another fun fact is that in 1951 one of the like most legendary mountaineers uh eric shipton had his own personal collection of photographs of yeti footprints that he had taken on expeditions and uh he apparently all these footprints were at least 16 000 feet above sea level and he sold his personal collection of photos for 7500 dollars oh uh and then in 1959 probably my favorite fun fact is that there was a guy peter burn who was visiting this temple apparently so this is a weird thing apparently a lot of like the himalayan temples or monasteries had random body parts that like on display that were said to

be yetis so like they there's one that is specifically to this day there's like a skull of a yeti and if you donate to the monastery that's when they'll let you see the the skull love that game that's fun yeah and apparently there's like two or three places like one has the skull one has like a hand of a yeti one has something else so peter burn go went to the particular temple that had a hand of the like a severed hand of a yeti and uh he wanted he wanted one of the fingers and he did what he needed to so he brought a double, like a whole other finger. He brought a finger with him. I guess he had a friend who was like some sort of primatologist.

Or I guess there was a finger that this guy offered him. It was like, here's a random ape finger. Okay. ape finger um okay and so this guy he somehow had enough time to take off the finger of the severed hand and then replaced it with this finger he brought with him to the temple what a jerk so that way it would look like there was still a whole hand and no one would you know would know that he had taken a finger um so he took the finger somehow he knew literal president jimmy stewart and president jimmy stewart excuse me isn't jimmy stewart an actor or is jimmy stewart a president what am i thinking i'm thinking of ronald reagan how he's an actor and a president jesus that's

what i was thinking of oh my god i was like what is wrong with me okay i was like i don't want to answer this because we've known that like both of us can dig each other into a hole. No, no, no. Sorry. I was thinking of Ronald Reagan because he was an actor and a president. And then I heard Jimmy Stewart and put both of them in my head together. I see. Sorry. I see. I see. Okay. So he knew he did know Jimmy Stewart though. And, uh, well, I guess he also happened to be in town, but my favorite is that you said president Jimmy Stewart and I went, uh- uh-huh i was not even gonna correct you i was like okay i guess so confident it's okay uh but so i uh yeah so they happen to be in town jimmy stewart and his wife gloria and uh this guy who had the finger was like oh let's let's meet up for coffee or something while you're in town with the finger in his pocket

told them that he stole the finger and then um basically they said oh we're heading to london next after this and this guy convinced them to smuggle the finger out of the country to london and my gosh what a jerk they did it by jimmy stewart's wife hiding it in her lingerie case which like the tsa was not going to look through of course and uh or customs was not going to look through and uh to this day that finger is now at the royal college of surgeons and the dna ended up proving it was a human finger so he literally stole a human finger and then had it taken out of the country and now it's on display as like a stolen finger that jimmy stewart helps smuggle in um and then the last thing i'm going to say is when you and i were in boston during the blizzard in 2015 uh boston had its

own boston yeti and this was just a guy that started trending on twitter dressed like a yeti walking through the blizzard um he was walking up and down different streets he was helping people dig out their cars oh yeah i remember that I remember that. And he started, like, people on Twitter started, like, going crazy for the Boston Yeti. And he ended up getting interviewed anonymously because he didn't want to give his ID out. If they asked who he was, they said he was like, I'm the Yeti. I'm the Boston Yeti. And on ABC News, he said, snowstorms are funny because a sense of camaraderie develops in the community. For me, I wanted to lend a claw and do my part.

And that's the Yeti. And that Yeti was me. Can you imagine if today this is me outing myself as like, I was like holding my breath. Just in case. I'm not shocked, but anyway. Oh my God. That was a good one, Em.

I had no idea about like 99 99 of that or probably more than that well i'm i'm glad to have helped i uh i'm sorry about uh i don't know just being wildly confusing i feel like half that was me just describing the monster and i felt like i was being uh redundant i guess so sorry no no no no no i feel like a good listicle is always very helpful um yeah and also like super sorry for saying that jimmy stuart was like literally a president that was the dumbest thing i've ever said at this rate anyone can be am i right am i right okay uh all right um i have a story for you this is my my version of our christmas story even though i've already done you know jean-benet ramsey which was

technically on christmas so whatever here's another one okay okay so this one um i wonder if you've heard of it so it well it's weird that you keep having christmas crimes or something of christmas i know there's a shocking amount of them like a shocking amount you know we should cover at some point in a future christmas episode is uh that um uh the the hollywood murder house that like the family died during christmas yes that's right i have that bookmarked from like years ago i think we couldn't find enough information on it i think it was like but that was also in like 2017 so nowadays we probably could find more now that we know how to like use the internet properly yeah for it was literally called i think the hollywood murder house where like on christmas day like the dad like it's really fucked up killed everyone and like you

can for a long time it was abandoned and you could like go look through the window and still see like from the 50s like the presents were still unopened under the tree like left everything under the tree and i remember by the time we looked into it like the one of the like grandsons or something had like cleaned it out and stuff but it was just such a creepy story yeah i will i will try to do that next year yeah okay anyway okay if i ever remember which i won't so okay this is a story of dewey sham aka the santa claus burglaries have you heard of this uh-uh okay so it's pretty disturbing so sorry to ruin everyone's christmas great okay super duper as i'm like say hope you've had fun so far okay great so this takes place in the 60s in a mountainous region of montana in a town called wenberg the 60s okay

yes when president jimmy stewart was around yeah exactly back in the heyday you know and you know and his off season he was also starring in like it's a wonderful life but it's okay and like carrying like human fingers around yeah yeah in his wife's lingerie, yeah. So Dewey Sham was born in 1945 and grew up on the outskirts of Wenberg, this town. He was born as a pretty weak child. As a toddler, he had a bad head injury. Okay, well, there it is. When he fell off a sleigh. So we know what happens when that happens as a child.

I feel like if we really ever had to write notes about, like if we had to do real quick bullets on a true crime, if we just started with head injury, it would answer so many later questions. Yeah. I feel like if my child has a head injury, I'm going to be like, uh-oh. Keep an eye out. Even if for some reason in the future we don't speak, if my child has a head injury, I'm going to text you and be like, I needed someone to know and I needed someone to care. of head injury, I'm going to text you and be like, I needed someone to know and I needed someone to care. No, you're gonna if we're not speaking, you're gonna call me and be like, my child is perfect and wants to stay with you for the summer. Bye. Good luck, Christine, you can take care of him. We haven't spoken in a while. But like, I just had this calling that like, you two are really

gonna get along. Yeah, you guys are gonna hit it off. Oh my god. Don't worry, we we can trade i'm sure mine will be just as fucked up we'll send each other our own children well they'll both have head injuries and we just won't have we won't say anything to each other and we'll both realize at the same time what happened and then our friendship will be re-bonded and it'll be great uh-huh yeah that's exactly anyway that's how that's the epilogue to the epilogue i guess i like that in this story we've created like this horrible rift between us as if like we are not the types to get over a grudge in like 10 minutes and then our so and then our solution to the rift is decades later having to murder each other through our own children oh my god it's pretty good i like it somebody write that down i want to write a new,

a new. We'll write, we'll write a movie. Yeah. We'll write some, we'll, we'll shop it. We'll do a little manuscript.

I want to star Hugh Grant as my husband. Can I do that? Okay. Okay. We both know it's going to be Jude Law. And even if it's not literally we'll hire Hugh Grant and you'll go, oh my God, you guys got Jude Law.

That's crazy. That's exactly it. The other day I was like insisting that Jude Law was in something and Blaze was like, Christine, that's not Jude Law that's crazy that's exactly it the other day I was like insisting that Jude Law was in something and Blaze was like Christine that's not Jude Law and then we looked it up and it fucking was Jude Law and I have never felt so vindicated but then the next day we were watching something and Blaze was like you're not gonna say anything and it was like a trailer and I was like say anything about what and he's like that Jude Law's in there and I was like that wasn't Jude Law and he's like and that was I we just uh we just finished on Marvel Monday this week. We finished captain Marvel.

And there were so many times I almost, you're so lucky. My phone was busy. Cause I was on Instagram live. I would have sent so many pictures of Jude law. I've been like, Oh my God, it's Jude law.

But I also might've only sent pictures of Brie Larson and been like, wait a minute. Is that true? Wait, is he in it or something? See, that's what I don't even know. He's the bad guy.

Oh, that's what it was. We saw that. And blaze was like, you're not going to say anything else. Like about what? He's like about Jude law. And I was like that's not jude law it was jude law anyway this is embarrassing shocking it's just shocking it's a gift it's a curse uh-huh anyway it's a curse and not a gift i wish you knew how many times i think of jude law in my life and

almost send you a picture of him just just to piss you off but then i don't do it so i have to tell you about it today it makes me happy okay anyway back to this horrible crime okay so he had this head injury as a child not a good sign um and the head injury caused other health issues including a hearing sensitivity um as well as an extreme personality shift that manifested mostly as violent outbursts he was also born with a congenital heart defect so just all around like a pretty weak child unfortunately his parents died when he was really young so basically he's just like the life's had it out for him i guess so he almost had to like raise himself and uh you know this is

like in the 40s in this like small town so it's not like anybody really did anything about it he basically he kind of like became sort of like a mountain man like he raised himself okay so he's had a head injury and then what else happened again so far so he had a head injury that caused like extreme behavioral shifts and stuff like that but then both of his parents died when he was really young so at this point he's like kind of on his own um he lived on the outskirts of town like i said but he rarely like he never left the area growing up um and he was very like anti-social so he never went in town he never really interacted with people in town and it was a really small town where everybody kind of knew each other so he was sort of just like

the outsider um he was pretty isolated out in the woods he lived alone for most of his life he learned to forage hunt um and even like so so he was kind of i mean he really was like a mountain man sure he was probably the yeti actually oh wait yeah actually he was he was the wild man in the snow wait a minute we figured it out a lot of sense now i have a finger actually of his uh oh my gosh so uh people were like somewhat wary of him but he'd been there for so long that they just kind of like i don't know ignored it and left him alone sure um but he did have a pretty extensive rap sheet for being on his own so he had a criminal record that included everything from petty theft traffic violations trespassing fraud vandalism and animal cruelty uh all the way to full-on armed robbery

and vehicle theft so he's like uh somehow still you know not evading the law even though he's like evading shock i like how they just leave him in the woods then they're like we don't even want like don't invite him to brunch okay so we're gonna leave him off the invite list got it cool um but it seems like the it seemed like the isolation was only making his like violent tendencies and anger worse especially because he had had that like extreme personality shift and head injury as a kid so in one winter in 1966 things got bad uh dewey formed a plan uh it's just okay buckle up okay so little background so this small town wenberg um they it was christmas season they had this like festival they did every year and they would get together at city hall for a dinner

party that i guess he was not invited to um and obviously dewey had not participated in this since he was like a kid uh so for whatever reason on christmas eve 1966 he kind of snapped um in the middle of the night he went i think i actually saw this in an episode on i think id or something at one point. In the middle of the night, he went into town and just, like, fully terrorized this village. Oh, shit. So, remember, this is, like, a long time ago. So, they didn't have alarm systems or anything like that. So, the most up, okay, so, this is just all very fucked up. But one of the most fucked up parts, remember how I said he'd, like, learn to sew?

Mm-hmm. So, when he broke, he started breaking into people's homes and he was dressed as freaking santa claus the entire time what like he like dressed as santa and then started breaking into people's homes um and i don't know if it was like he lost his marbles or maybe he was like oh it's like people it's christmas eve so they'll think i'm real like i don't know i don't know why only children were home that was exactly like all their parents are at this like city hall thing and all the kids are home and he just waltzes on in he's like hi it's me maybe it worked on at least one or two houses those children were like

holy shit guess who just came and the parents weren't here well you're about to oh god okay okay eat your words okay so once he was inside he did that creepy thing we always talked about where he like made himself at home you know like how the the original night stalker would like have a beer and like eat turkey yeah so he would like go in their fridge he would help himself to the contents he would take like their valuables um and then at one of the houses his plan went south so one of the houses, his plan went south. So one of the family members woke up and walked in to find him like sifting through their belongings. And it was a toddler.

It was a little kid. Oh shit. So this little kid walks out and sees him. And I guess, I guess this Santa outfit worked because the kid was like, Oh, what are you doing? Like,

Oh my gosh. Just like thought it was Santa, I guess, which I guess that makes sense. I guess i mean okay and not one circumstance though that's wildly convenient like yes what a way to uh maybe he knew what he was doing but more than i thought i don't know he didn't like kill the kid did he did he just uh like i'm santa goodbye now Up the chimney I go. I'm Santa. Goodbye. Up the chimney I go. Oh, my God.

Okay. So he also had his dog low with him. Okay. Which like poor dog to be even like living with this man. Wait, he was bringing a dog into these houses? Was his dog a mute or something? I mean, I assume the dog was like very well trained can you imagine if you decided you were going to break into everyone's houses and bring geo okay well okay let me tell you how fucking fast you'd get arrested to be fair i don't even know how to sew

anything so i assume this mountain man knew how to like train a dog or well he was also like i remember he'd gone in trouble for animal cruelty so i don't know like what the fuck this guy has done right okay um but he had some sort of i guess a hold on this dog um but the dog was like friendly enough so it didn't like attack the kid i don't know i don't know how he like pulled this off but um he did not kill the child which is how we know what happened basically um just to give you like some give everyone a little warning did the dog did the kid get to meet the dog too can you imagine if you were the kid and you're like where's the fucking reindeer this thing this dog it's a german shepherd it's this fucking okay got it got it you're gonna fly away on tramp it's like growling at you right uh but so the guy literally talks to the kid and then he's

like the kid's like what are you doing or you know i guess it's a toddler so i don't know how well they can speak um and he basically just like talks to her and is like oh don't worry and then like gives her a snack and says don't like don't tell your parents and then before she can like go wake her parents up he fucking peaces out and like well sure yeah goodbye i am santa goodbye goodbye now and especially like if your toddler comes in and is like i just Well, sure. Yeah. Goodbye. I am Santa. Goodbye. Goodbye now. And especially like if your toddler comes in and is like, I just saw Santa. You're like, okay. And he had a dog. Well now for the rest of my life, every, every Christmas morning when our child's like, I saw Santa,

I'm going to be like, where were the, where was Santa? Where did he go? Did he take mommy's pearls? I don't know why I assume either one of our- You said it so like a little haunted Victorian doll. Did he take mommy's pearls? Like in what universe do either of our households have pearls? But that's besides the point. Oh my God.

Okay, well, did he take the steak out of the fridge? I guess is the ultimate question. Did his weird like scoundrel dog just like show up and not bark oh my god okay so anyway now this creep has stolen all the shit out of people's houses and like even interacted with one of the kids so he and his dog start to head back home and he's on his way back out of town when he hears a commotion um and he is convinced that like they've called the sheriff and he knows that he's, you know, had this like bad criminal record. And so he's like, shit, I'm going to jail.

So he hides out. And maybe the kid. Do you think the kid like told the parents and the parents believe the kid and like he thought. Yeah, that's I think that's probably what what he at least what he thought happened because he like pretty soon after he left he heard like commotion he was like oh my god they're calling the police like i've outed myself to this child and now yeah yeah but instead of sirens he hears them start singing okay in this town okay and they're singing this like weird song that they sing every year that doesn't quite totally make sense to me but i guess this maybe is a montana thing and the lyrics are like what you're gonna fucking hold my hand and sing about how much you like want to date me or

something again it's even better i hear the licks welcome christmas come this way Welcome Christmas, come this way. Are you serious? You don't recognize this song? I'm starting to. So essentially, this town is having this Christmas party in the town square despite all of his horrible crimes. And like some sort of miracle, his congenital heart defect just sort of healed. Okay, Christine, got it.

some sort of miracle his congenital heart defect just sort of healed christine got it and and his head injury was just magically reversed and suddenly the hate in his heart was replaced with love and adoration you did a good job wait a minute i got way farther than i thought i would um so he and his dog low turn their snowmobile around, and they race back into town, still dressed as Santa, to return all the stolen goods. I like, by the way, up until now, you have not said snowmobile until this exact moment. Because at this point, I knew that I'd be giving up. Are you sure you mean sleigh? Sleigh. Stolen goods.

So for the first time in decades, Dewey participated in the Christmas festivities. He even sat at the head of the table for the first time in decades dewey participated in the christmas festivities he even sat at the head of the table for the christmas feast then they all held hands and sang their weird unintelligible song together and he carved the roast beast the end okay okay hear me out so i think i heard my skull crack i like what an out-of-body experience okay well i feel way dumb wait okay so uh okay phew this was really stressful does dewey sham spill dr seuss or some shit dewey sham is a synonym for wet blanket it took me a long time to come up with oh my god dewey oh that's funny so came up with, Dewey Sham stands for wet blanket. By the way, this is the story of the Grinch, if anyone's wondering.

It was very difficult to come up with a name that wasn't like too, like the grump. Like I couldn't come up with anything. So I did wet blanket, a synonym for wet blanket. Dewey Sham, that's genius. It really sounded like a real fucking person. Oh, good. I was like, Blaze, who is this? And he was like, I don real fucking person oh good i was like blaze who is this and he's like i don't fucking know and i was like okay good uh the town was called wenberg instead of whoville uh like who when uh-huh uh-huh uh-huh bergville and uh let's

see head injury i just assumed that the grinch had a head injury montana though what a weird thing i couldn't fit i couldn't find it i was because okay so do you know where whoville actually was located in in dr seuss's mind i don't know on a fucking snowflake and i was like how am i supposed to say that without sounding like totally looney tunes can you imagine first of all i would have still not figured out it was the grinch i just thought you were literally insane it, Oh, and he lived in this town on a snowflake. And I'd be like, I have questions, but I'm not going to ask a single one.

What about the dog? The dog was Max. The dog is named low and that's the opposite of Max. Oh, I'm surprised you named the dog like mini. Yeah. I was scared that that was too, too spot on.

I was like so nervous nervous you'd figure it out like right away hey guess what i absolutely didn't even when you sang i was like this sounds oddly familiar what's happening here halfway through i was like oh fuck i'm just gonna like not have seen the grinch and been like literally what are those sounds coming out of your face if you told me like and then all of a sudden taylor momson shows up and she's like singing about where christmas is because she's lost it. Then I would have really figured it out. See, okay.

I never saw those Grinch movies. I only ever saw like the 1966 movie. Oh, really? And the book. So, oh, I was going to say at the end, and Matthew Morrison is now traumatically scarring people. Have you been watching those clips? Because it is out of this world.

It is the, it's like now become kind of a little bit of a porno it's like it's horrific if you don't know matthew morrison has has really sexualized the grinch in a way i didn't know was possible yeah renee said her her instagram has now turned into a matthew morrison hate account so i don't know if that means anything to anyone but um oh and i said he learned to sew because he sewed his own like grinch costume uh-huh i said okay so his entire criminal record basically petty theft traffic violations with that fucking sled uh trespassing fraud trying to be santa wow you really this you didn't i mean you really took the after 200 plus episodes of like having to like be really like critical and you're thinking and like you're you're fact checking I think you saw a creative

opportunity and sprinted with I aggressively was like I'm gonna I'm just gonna put all of my like this is where my script writing comes in um and so vandalism obviously and then animal cruelty because i re-watched the movie from 66 and i'm like he is not nice to that dog oh he's certainly i remember him being real fucking awful to matt he like whips the dog i'm like that is not okay so i kept that in now it makes sense why that dog was like so submissive and like yeah not barking to children oh my god christine you're so anyway this was just horrible this is how this is how i imagine you felt after the escape room where i'm just like you are dangerously good at bamboozling me okay do you know why this happened do you have any last

year right didn't we say something about this last year we said remind okay we said in an episode of November 2019, remind Christine to do the Grinch and pretend like it's a real story. And then one of us said, oh, and we can pretend he has an enlarged heart. And we were going on and on. We had a whole thing about it. And then I said, but don't remind Em. Just remind me because I don't want Em to know. And I have gotten

I mean the amount of DMs and tweets and emails and that's why I was so frantic about like doing our Christmas episode because every time someone tweeted I was like I really hope M doesn't see this I didn't see a couple people tagged you in it and I was like hello don't tag M like they're not supposed to know if I I saw it, it completely, clearly did not process in my stupid brain. And it's so funny because in my head, I was like, oh, Em's gonna know because it's all I've been thinking about

and all everyone has been asking me to do for like the last three months. In October is when people started being like, just a reminder, just a reminder. And I was like, oh, so anyway. Not a clue. Phew, I'm glad that's over. Good, I'm glad that you have less stress now.

That was, uh, I'm just really wowed by your artistic license there. You did a really good job. I felt bad because I was like, what kind of crime? There's not even a crime. I was like, I wrote the first bullet is this is a very disturbing story, but then like nothing disturbing. You had the nerve really to even be like, oh, I think I saw this on discovery or something because i said he snapped and i was like okay how do i like i saw an episode of uh snapped you could have said you watched it on fucking netflix and you wouldn't

have really been lying i was trying to come up with a way to say it i saw it on tv without being too sneaky but it would i mean i have a headache i was very nervous i'm very impressed with you and also saddened by my own no i tried really hard to until how long did it take you to write that because you didn't have to really research anything you had to like write that as a as a yeah i wrote i watched the movie a couple times and then i researched the hell out of the stupid story which like is how i know that whoville is on a snowflake, which I'm like, that's not helpful to me whatsoever. Then Thesaurus.com got like 50% of their yearly business from me for looking up wet blankets. Well, also, the fact that you could not say the most fun fact of all, that they lived on a fucking snowflake.

I know. I was so annoyed. I was like, I need, huh. Yeah. So I put in a blank. And as we did it i was like montana i don't know i made up i made up i think maybe had you said that like you dress the dog as a reindeer or something then i would have caught on yeah i i took apart i took some things out that i thought would be too obvious i really feel like i should have caught it by the time you said that a dog came with him i was just like can you imagine if someone as loud as geo was going to help you sneak in somewhere because that i know i kept trying to be like yeah yeah anyway there was a dog let's him. I was just like, can you imagine if someone as loud as Gio was going to help you sneak in

somewhere? Cause that, I know I kept trying to be like, yeah, yeah. Anyway, there was a dog. Let's not talk about it.

Oh, well, well, thank you for going with me on that ride. Thank you to everyone who kept reminding me. And, uh, sorry if I just frenetically ran through that.

Cause I was so nervous. That is, uh, now my favorite episode you've ever done. Cause you never get, you never get to really be creative with yours because like with the with like my end of things like paranormal wise I can almost kind of like write the story because there's just like oh this happened then this happened then this happened but you usually have to be so strict with your like chronology to things yeah I guess I'm so happy for you that

had to have been really fun thanks it was very fun i was i was very excited to to do it maybe you should start doing more fake crimes too like that oh my god your poor anxiety every time you're gonna be like this is fake and i'm gonna be like no this is an actual homicide m oh i haven't thought of that but this would be i mean think of the possibilities like i mean that's think of the possibilities yeah anyway thank you everybody for letting me do that that was fun that little con well thank you i appreciate it i had that was i had a lot of fun at the end knowing that like i could finally breathe like this is the first sigh of relief i could ever have on the show you were very you were like i think i know what's happening but i like also don't understand also you well you really threw me when you said you're about to sing and i was like this fucking woman again every time every time i thought you'd have figured

it out right before that so i was like oh fuck now i have to actually start singing and i was like okay maybe there was like a play at the city hall like that's what i was trying a little bethlehem some of the bullets were like i guess this was their christmas tradition every year oh my god the musicale if you will oh boy anyway well perfect what a great christmas episode in wenberg in wenberg wow on a snowflake or a lick of flames or something i'm not sure what the opposite is in a fireplace where mooney put all of his other on one uh embered ash or something oh well thank you for that anyway uh i'm now terrified of your mind once more but what's new oh my god it goes both ways now with the escape room also this is the last episode of 2020 whoa my stomach dropped i'm so happy that

it's over it's like climatic it's like i'm i can't wait to never record another 2020 episode but also like me too whoa oh so i guess at least we didn't oh end on like a real murder we ended on like true a fun a classic story well last year we apparently made a lot of predictions about 2020 that's right and they all we refuse to do that they went real wrong yeah so like people still quote us about that so maybe when we make predictions for 2021 we just say hopefully it's a lot fucking better than 2021 because like this one but we're also not getting our hopes up because we don't want to jinx it like we did last year please god let something normal happen in 2021 we were literally joking about like a quarantine at the end of 2019 like are you fucking kidding

me i don't i know Are you fucking kidding me? I don't. I know because you like taught me the word quarantine. We were like, how crazy can you imagine if that happened nowadays? It's like full on. We were we were really fucking up with with our 2020 talk. So I'm just going to let 2021 do its thing. And I'm not going to try and like put my opinion on it and see what happens okay how about when something really

really really cool happens in 2021 y'all tag us about this episode and be like just so you know it's 2021 right now and i'm listening to this episode and something really cool happened and then and you reversed it you reversed the curse you put on on all of us and then people will just tweet us good news about their lives in 2021 so we yes and this is me saying you're welcome yeah for that you are well i i saw it coming i i said it you know we did i fucking said we're doing it again um oh my god we're doing it again okay let's at least hope that like it's not as bad as 2020 that's what i'm let's hope let's leave it a little bit let's just fingers crossed okay okay fingers crossed anyway we will see you in 2021 everybody oh my god this could be the year we meet our kids. Wait a minute.

Okay, goodbye. The year we meet our kids. Oh my God, Em says this every year. I can't wait to say it in 2022 also. All right, you better get cooking then. And that's why we drink. you