And That's Why We Drink - E236 Ghostly Dog Breath and a Sardine and Sadness Sandwich

Episode Date: August 15, 2021

We are the Village People this week! It's episode 236 and Em is taking us across the pond to tell the tale of a village full of ghosts known as Pluckley Village. Then Christine brings us a wildly disturbing cult in a Mexican village in the 60s that Em dubs Madame LaLaurie-esque, the story of Magdalena Solís. And also be sure to stay til the very end to hear what size Christine's baby is this week... and that's why we drink! Please consider supporting the companies that support us! Go to Canva.me/atwwd to get your FREE 45-day extended trial!Right now, Modern Fertility is offering our listeners $20 off the test when you go to ModernFertility.com/DRINKGo to THIRDLOVE.com/DRINK now to find your perfect-fitting bra... and get 20% off your first purchase!Go to Brooklinen.com and use promo code ATWWD to get $20 off, with a minimum purchase of $100!This podcast is sponsored by BetterHelp and And That’s Why We Drinklisteners get 10% off their first month at betterhelp.com/DRINKJust go to ZipRecruiter.com/drink to try ZipRecruiter for free!

um okay i think we're good if you are i'm ready by the way fun fact did you know that's how i sleep wait i sleep like that too with my arms up haven't we talked about this i think i actually we had a sleepover and our elbows kept bumping into each other oh we should have looped our arms so we were like like walking down a path together yeah i sleep like this too and sometimes my arms fall asleep and so then in the morning i have to like pick them up oh that feels good you know when it doesn't feel good is when your arm falls off the bed and like all the blood rushes to your fingertips and then like you feel good you try to move your arm and you're like like your arm is like the size of a building i think we should i feel like if we have a sleepover soon we should like put i feel like somebody no we should probably lock all the doors i feel like

blazer somebody would walk in and be like they're so weird i feel I feel like even when we sleep, we're probably so fucking weird. You know what would be so precious, though? Like, let's pretend God's taking an x-ray of us or something, right? Okay? Where are we going with this? I don't know. I'm going to close my eyes. But if we had a sleepover together and then someone took a little picture, then, like, it would be very cute if all three of us the little baby was even sleeping

with their arms like okay that's pretty sweet yes it's so sweet it's like where's this x-ray going now i get it yeah there's another human involved got it got it won't be for much longer and like give it like a couple weeks and then we don't need the x-ray machine they actually do we don't need that x-ray machine anymore um but they actually do sell like swaddles one of the swaddles we bought has the arms like this because babies tend to sleep like that so maybe that's why we so smart you know speaking of swaddles and babies uh there's nothing i love more than sleeping like a baby and so there's this thing i guess it probably existed for a lot longer but it's only recently showed up in my instagram feed where it's basically an adult swaddle and i can't wait

to buy it it's definitely gonna be my next purchase someone else have to put it on for you i think it's like those mermaid legs where you just kind of like shimmy it or maybe maybe like you do like the jump in the old potato sack thing and then you dive onto the bed after you're already in like a lot of extra effort they never show you how it's put on so i'm sure it's not cute but i can't wait for the unboxing and demo that you're gonna do for all of us on camera oh my gosh did you see my little demo i woke up this morning i had to pour my cereal and i was like oh my god emma opened mr tony's box yes i watched the whole thing emothy it was beyond i am so happy for you it's the the blanket is like now i have kicked my pendleton out of the way my like

300 that you received from your mother and like my free tony's chocolony blanket is now my new security blanket so um i was uh i was wrapped up in one of them and the other like the tony chocolony one i was like just kind of snuggled with i was like allison move over big pony is in the bed now so i got a new weighted blanket this week so i think we're both on the blanket train yeah it's a good time you know um trying to ease my restless legs how are you what is your why do you drink this week oh great question well you know what um we're finally finishing up the nursery and it's on the side of the house that has always made me slightly uncomfortable because it's like why did you do that to yourself it's the only it's where the nursery goes and so i great by the way like spoiler alert to nobody i hope but like be prepared for some really horrific ghost stories

to come i know we have like the little baby monitor and i'm like oh my god i'm already scared to look at it it's not even all i'll get an infrared camera instead like you're gonna no i'll just use god's x-ray machine oh right yeah that'll do um and so but like there's something about this that has has always given me the creeps but so now put your baby there good right exactly motherhood already at 100 percent and it's maternal instincts we put it up uh we set everything up it's beautiful in there Right, exactly. Your motherhood already at 100%. Maternal instincts. We put it up. We set everything up. It's beautiful in there.

But like I noticed recently, like the cats and dogs don't like to go over there. And I'm like, this is not a good sign. But so to be fair, for the first few months of their life, the baby will be sleeping in our room in a bassinet. Oh, good good so we'll learn to feel safe and then you will say go away on the other side of the house also like i always i still i mean obviously kids are not in my near future your kid is but mine is not i like to think like i know my kid's gonna be traumatized in some way like there's just no like there's no way we're gonna avoid that there's something's gonna make that kid a mess like i am and i always wonder

what that thing is gonna be you don't have to wonder anymore oh yeah i got it covered you've already made the call you're like oh i'm gonna you know put it in the place i an adult don't want to be i mean honestly like if it's just some ghostly trauma like fine i mean that's all right right that's better than some other trauma you you know, that I feel like could be. Your baby's going to start pointing at things, and the baby's going to be like, my best friend. And you're going to be like, you're an infant. How are you talking? And also, why is it in Latin?

Why are there so many teeth? Don't worry. So anyway, I've already planned this whole thing about Em visiting me before Mothman, and I just have big plans, so I can't wait to show you. You're going to put me in the nursery. I'm so sad. I put you in the toddler bed. I can't imagine.

I think you're going to, first of all, make me build it, and then I think you're going to make me sleep in it. I already stapled all the curtains to the wall. Don't worry. That would make you really janky. Oh, is that not your aesthetic christine i'm sorry it's my aesthetic it's not the baby's aesthetic okay it's my aesthetic i've nailed my curtains to the wall don't worry i like how aesthetic wise where i know you've stapled something to a wall i know you have and i don't know what it is you're gonna wander around and find it at least you don't do it in the baby's room so the baby has a safe space in the exact unsafe space yeah yeah yeah i want

to at least make it physically safe not metaphysically you know right one way right why do you drink this week emothy um i drink well for your baby who can't drink yet um i also drink oh my gosh wait oh wait oh i just thought about the the first time the baby makes an appearance can the baby be drinking a bottle and then we can go why do you drink and then the baby will be like i'm fucking traumatized over here can you help me what if honestly we could do a breastfeeding and then it'll be like some weird viral thing we'll be like yeah breastfeeding on camera but no let's do no let's do the bottle we'll see i'm look i'm fine with either i'm sure the baby would be fine with either but really when

it's like and why do you drink little baby the baby will be like help me s.o.s uh no why do i drink um yesterday i i have an answer i yesterday i decided that i was gonna give myself a relaxing day oh because i just going back and forth to florida so many times and seeing my family is just a lot and i feel like i've kind of been like running around non-stop and i was like i'm just gonna vibe i'm just gonna like that for you do my thing and so and then i was explaining it like the things i did and i was like i sound like i'm in the 40s like not in my 40s i'm in the 1940s um because i got my lennon fong in the morning obviously of course and then um but then i like went to the general store and had a sandwich and then i went to the barber shop and

then i went down to the ice cream parlor. I was like, what is wrong with me? You tossed a nickel to the young man on the corner. What on earth? I went to the comic book shop just to stroll around. But I literally went to the, like we have a diner. We have a local literal general store called the general store. I didn't know about that.

We have the, our local, we have the our local we have a local barber shop that's not too far from me which is where i got this like gaudy hairstyle god and then hairstyle and then you look great and then i went to um i went to like a literal diner and had a cherry coke who the fuck am i and like i circle i didn't even mean to do all those things in that order and uh what are they called the egg creams um no but i like i did all those things and then after i was explaining the things i did i went what happened what was wrong with me today i was like what did you enter a portal or something i know i was like all that combined sounds like i had a really specific intentional day you were going to like live out a history okay but to be fair then you opened a

tony chocolony that also sounds pretty damn 40s you know so like you kind of put the aesthetic like and then you know big tony came over and he dropped off a package for me you know i said okay and then you bought yourself a baby swaddle i haven't bought that yet to be fair that's in the modern days that's in the shopping list on instagram got it yeah yeah anyway that's why i drink because i i actually i was sitting there the general store literally looks like an old ass general store i love that and they have they make like little sandwiches and so i sat there and I intentionally didn't use my phone. So I just was kind of like living in the moment.

And I was like, whoa, this is even pretty old school of me. Not using your phone. Yeah. Looking around at people. Sitting in a place with a bunch of baskets and mason jars on the ceiling and just living, you know. Did you read a newspaper? That would have been excellent.

If there was one, I would have done it. But no. Wow. you read a newspaper that would have been excellent if if there was one i would have done it but wow anyway all of that to say i had a good day yesterday so that's it sounds like it i'm feeling kind of like vegged out and you're like vibing i love it yeah just bouncing around with my shitty hair anyway come on i like your hair it looks great it looks it looks silly but luckily if i like just you know push my hair out really hard it'll start growing again like I'm a Play-Doh doll. It's a very special talent you have. Just really think hard.

If you do it for two weeks or so, the hair will start showing up. That's actually pretty incredible. Miraculous. Here is my story for you and i don't know how i never covered this before but this is a whole village of ghosts what um wait my story is a village too of ghosts no but like a crime oh but i've never even done a it's like a vill it's literally a village where i don't yeah i have no idea what you're talking about immediately i don't know like a commune sort of yeah oh but like that's so weird because it's like a whole the story is like of the village your story is of a village of ghosts that's really freaky oh we're the village people fun okay so uh so here is my story this is pluckley village i don't know

what this is but i'm amped so it's in england it's near london and it's like i say that because apparently it's near kent which is near london okay If I'm getting that right. So it's like two degrees of separation away from London. Okay. But it is England's most haunted village. Holy shit. Which, by the way, is verified by the Guinness Book of World Records. I didn't know that was a category, but okay. I also did not know it was a category.

Also, it is no longer a category. I wonder because they were like, how do you vet this? Like, how do you quantify it? no longer a category. I wonder because they were like, how do you vet this? You know, like, how do you quantify it? I guess. Yeah. But I guess they've said it was this was in 1989. Guinness said, all right, you're the most weird year for Guinness. And it was a good year for Pluckley Village because if they like Guinness, like officially stated it and then like never did that category again. So like Pluckley is just like officially it.

They like swept in, grabbed the trophy and ran. Yep. Love that. So there's at least a dozen ghosts here, but it could be up to 16. But they say there's on record at least 12 ghosts. There are also some other paranormal based Guinness World Records. Would you like me to read them to you? Absolutely, please. Okay, perfect. Getting my glasses on. paranormal based guinness world records would you like me to read them to you absolutely please

okay perfect getting my glasses on professor schultz is in the house okay so the most participants in a paranormal scientific study oh do you want to guess how many people were in this study 60 oh no it was it was like good for me oh never mind so in 2000 there was a a study where 1027 people all were a part of this study where they just documented their experience at a haunted place together oh shit okay so the the location was uh called the hampton court palace which i guess is really haunted and they just walked around and be there or was he not part of this is he just shockingly zb was not he's probably upset he's not that he wasn't there he's probably thinking i will now compete for the most participants in a paranormal study 203 or whatever yeah plus one a thousand twenty eight people 28 add erin to the mix

erin get to hampton court palace quick so another one is the uh largest ouija board do you want to guess how big the ouija board is? 40 feet. It's bigger in feet than there were people at that one study. Oh, shit. Okay. 1500 feet wide. Close. It was 1302. I can't even fat like I can't like picture that in my head. So I don't know. That sounds huge. Oh, you know what? Well, I don't know it in like, I don't know it in my mind as the shape of a rectangle. But yeah, this apartment is 1250. So 50 square feet more would be the Ouija board. Oh, oh, wait. So it was 12 something.

It was it's 1300 square feet or square. I don't know. Yeah, it is. Okay. So it's like, so it's 1300 square feet or square i don't know yeah it is 13 square feet okay so it's like so it's wow shorter in length than than that it's uh that's still a lot for apparently that's 121 meters squared for those of you who don't use feet that's fucking big that is big although my guess was bigger with a 1500 feet long that's true i think about um i think about like the the piano at feo schwartz you can like dance on i feel like like you're one of the letters at that point on a Ouija board how cool you could be like as a ghost you could literally just walk around and like yeah carry the planchette that's

what it is it's the fao schwartz piano for ghosts that's right and actually did you know that i bought my first ouija board at fao schwartz in new york city no i got my first one as a birthday present for my fifth or my 10th birthday party in fifth grade and i remember it being a real crisis because it was virginia and my 10th birthday party was a harry potter theme party and so some like christian kids couldn't come to the party and then we're like no it's gonna be fine and then one of the presents i got was a ouija board and their parents were like okay gotta go rails anyway okay oh here's two more. Okay. The most viewers in a live streamed seance is... Most viewers in a live streamed seance.

So like a seance being... No. So I'll give you a context and it will make total sense. Okay. It happens to be in November 2020. So it was the day after Halloween when we were all inside. So take a guess on how many people were on the stream. Four billion.

It was 9300 people on Facebook. So almost 10,000 people. How come we weren't there? That sounds fun. We were having our own mini one the literal same day. Oh my God, you're right. We were doing a fucking seance together. Yeah.

For Patreon. Yeah. Well, I mean, se i mean maybe a strong word but you know ish we were we were hanging out with ghost equipment in the that's where we drink but that's why there were 9 000 people less because they were all on the facebook event you know think about how many we would have had if all of those folks would come to our party instead it's exactly the uh that's exactly why we had so few people there. We actually had that many planned.

We had that many people. We had snacks for that many. We had virtual seats for 10,000 people and only like 1000 came. We had enough cheese balls, enough natty light, and like, we still have leftovers. It's actually really sad.

Here's my favorite. Uh, this is the last one too, but my favorite paranormal record okay the most expensive ghosts what does that mean what does it mean i love that that's a fucking category i don't know so there are two vials of allegedly exorcised spirits from new zealand what and they sold in 2010 and in new zealand money it was 2830 dollars for us it would be uh 1990 dollars and it was also 1300 quid just for everyone conversion dollars for a while it was it was ten dollars shy of two grand for us it was basically

two grand for two vials of exercise spirits probably went to zach bagans to be clear i was gonna say he got it he got it for a steal honestly that man that man loves a spirit auction um anyway those are just some fun facts but the most important one is that pluckley has been deemed the most haunted village in England so okay and also like anywhere in England is so fucking old that I am shocked that the record is there's only 12 ghosts in this village and that makes it the most haunted like yeah I feel like all of England wherever you step there should be like a minimum like 700 guaranteed ghosts yeah like per square foot yeah I, I agree.

I don't know if that just means the 12 that were documented that day or whatever, but okay. So Pluckley is based in Kent, just outside of London. There it is. And it was the location setting I saw on one website. It was like, it's most famous for, and I was like, really? I've never heard of this. But maybe if you're from the UK, you've heard of this.

It was the location setting for the series the darling buds of may tv show that sounds like something made up making fun of England that sounds like an SNL sketch it really does actually I hadn't even thought of it but yeah it sounds exactly like I love the BBC. It sounds like satire. The Darling Buds of May. Oh my god, that's great. I'm sorry, I'm probably insulting everybody who's like, oh, I love that show. I mean, we don't, hello, we have Jackass. Yeah, right, we're not here to compare quality of our content. I'm sure the Darling Buds of May was just as delightful as it sounds.

Absolutely. I imagine it's like their little house on the prairie or something sounds like it so of the people who starred in the show one of them happened to be future famous katherine zeta jones oh shit okay wow so katie knows what's up she's like i was a darling bud how dare you she's like excuse me pluckley has been its own village or has been established i guess since the 11th century so yeah okay sure sure sure sure there's just no way in my mind there's only 12 ghosts nerd um and in 1955 that was the first mention of these towns of the town's ghosts in writing

or in print um because a guy named frederick sand, Pluckley was my playground. And I guess there is where he mentioned some of the local lore. So since the 50s, at least, the ghosts I'm going to mention have been discussed. Okay. Again, I'm shocked that if this town has been around since the 11th century, only like 60 years ago, they started talking about ghosts. This feels a little off to me, but we're riding with the research. Okay.

In the same timeframe, though, that this Pluckley Was My Playground came out and people started reading about the ghost stories. In the same time, in the 1950s, there was an article in the TV Times about Pluckley, I imagine because of the Darling Buds of May, and they were interviewing residents who actually lived in Pluckley and what it was like living there. And one guy named Desmond Carrington admits that in the interview for TV Times, he made up a bunch of ghost stories. So there's a chance that all of the ones i'm talking about are like associated through him and then don't say that over the decades like just it became local lore so it's i just want to state that like there is proof that someone out there like admittedly lied to the press about like this place being haunted well if the guinness book of world records is relying on one man in one article then like okay that's true you know i don't know i i like to think they at least got

a couple people confirming ghost sightings yeah so okay you've got on one side this one guy lied to the media about ghosts on the other side the literal guinness book of world records says that this place is haunted and in the middle you've got me who says this place is nearly a thousand years old like i'm pretty sure there's a ghost like there's at least a mediator like come on guys it's like for once using ghosts as my argument is like the most logical thing i've ever done so uh okay so pluckley has pluckley village and the ghosts have been discussed on a lot of news shows and TV shows. It's probably most famous for being on a few series, one of them being Strange But True, Most Haunted, Midsummer Murders, and Celebrity Haunted Hotel Live, BBC's Top Gear, and also Ghost Hunters International. Okay. So it's been around the block so the family that

we're talking about with pluckley village is the darings i guess pluckley village is small enough that basically the darings have near complete control of the entire property now is this called like darlings no but actually but actually, I wonder. It's Daring D-E-R. Okay, I was like, that would be quite a strange twist. You know what? In the 1950s, the Daring family was still very already well established in Pluckley Village. And if they're already doing a show based in Pluckley, I wonder if they were reading up on the research and daring

like helped spark and i'm pretty sure darling is the family in peter pan so you know maybe there was some uh we'll just kind of tweak their name a little bit maybe katherine j jones was actually wendy you know it could be i think actually darling buds of may is part of a poem or something i think that might be where it came from. But I don't know. I was like, Em, are you sure you didn't just accidentally forget the L in the word? I'm such an asshole. But how quickly it goes from like really precious and sweet and wholesome to like kind of like

threatening of like the daring buds of May. The daring family. That's true. That's true. And then all of a sudden I'm thinking of like horse races and cowboys and stuff. Okay. Oh, because it could be the daring buds like friends that's what i thought yeah like buddy buddy rom-com or whatever and darling buds like the little sweet cherubs that they are oh wow it really takes a complete turn with that one letter missing from the whole thing that's what

i'm saying yeah okay so the daring family d-e-r-I-N-G. Got it. During Henry II's reign, the Daring family inherited a manor at Pluckley. And I guess ever since, either they still owned the property or everything is still named after them. The history is still all about their family. The property was big enough that it nearly covered all of Pluckley. So it's basically the Daring estate when you go into Pluckley Village. Fun fact, there is a type of window all around Pluckley that is named after the Darings. Because during the Civil War, one of the Darings was captured during the war. And he escaped by going headfirst through a

window and i guess to commemorate the experience of him like escaping being a prisoner of war by running through a window they made all of the windows in town look like his window because i guess it brought luck to them what did his window look like the description i saw online was that they have round tops and i don't know daring window i don't it's just so random daring windows i'm gonna match all the windows oh it's i mean it looks kind of well i was gonna it probably sounds super ignorant and american but it's they look like windows at like a renaissance fair so um so i'm sure all of england it's in some places still might have that aesthetic here i just sent you a picture okay oh they're like round on the top and not on the bottom yeah yeah yeah what do you call that uh arched windows i call it a daring window it's

an arched window all right everybody yeah so apparently he went head first through one of those windows and that's how he escaped and i guess because it signified luck they made a lot of the windows on the estate and therefore most of the village signified luck to go head first out a window i guess i mean yeah you know what they really took the high road in that story i guess yeah they were like let's make this a good let's spin it to yeah yeah yeah we're gonna shop our team well they were the darings and they owned most of the land so uh so anyway fun fact there's a window named after them and after being deemed the most haunted village in England, apparently, so this is as of 1989, a bunch of like paranormal nerds, a.k.a. people like us, started like flooding the town. And so it very quickly got so bad that police had to stop people from coming in and they had to show like proof of residency and be pluckly because there was like property damage and shit i heard that's horrible uh one reference said that

like rocks were getting thrown at a school like what on earth are you doing if you're there to see ghosts don't like vandalize yeah some someone else or on another website i think i saw it there was like a fire got started it just it got really dramatic really fast so the cops ended up having to say like you can't even be here so it's i think it has a love hate relationship with the fact that it's got this title sure anyway there was that's pretty much all the history but the darings do come up a lot so i wanted to mention them i tried to i actually don't think i officially added up all of the ghosts. I just wrote down every single one I could find online.

There's definitely at least 12. But now I'm just reading the ghosts to you. That's the rest of the story is me just telling you what ghosts there are. I'm so excited. I love this. So there is the Black Horse Inn, which has been around since the 14th century. And it is part of the daring estate

apparently it was gifted to the darings from king charles ii can you imagine being like that tight with like a king and they're like oh yeah here you go here's a tavern there's a keg already inside like what okay but also if i could give you any gift i would totally be like oh here's a tavern with a keg inside i would never accept any gifts from anyone ever again i'd be like sorry i already got the coolest gift of all time it's a tavern honestly if you could gift me anything i know i've mentioned this before but how my mom i think i've mentioned this before do you think my mom and i really want to open up like an old school ice cream parlor okay i was like if you just say again right now how my family all owned candy shops.

I was like, I feel like you've said that 16 times. I definitely have. No, but yeah, no. Oh, okay.

That you and your mom, I forgot about that, but yeah, that's very, I, if you could give me any acreage and property, I would love, I could give you some,

like maybe in Kentucky, not in Burbank. I think maybe my, my pocket won't go that far but you can give me your haunted ass nursery until it's until i get evicted for the new renter so we purchased next door i don't know if i ever talked about this we purchased as part of the k and we didn't purchase it but it came with the property in a band and dennis office um so you could have that it's so super creepy in there um but christine i do need to

like request that you don't touch that until i'm there because i obviously want to investigate it with you yeah you need to come in there with me there's like a staircase that goes downstairs and only my sister my sister is the only person that's ever gone down there because it's like christine why don't we just stay the whole night there oh my god that sounds so fun your baby's right next door i'm pretty sure that my house is more hot than the fucking dentist's office okay unfortunately but i'm gonna have to stay for a long time i have like a dirt basement with like uh stone walls and a dirt basement yeah my dude oh my god and it's not finished no it's certainly not finished most of the house is not finished um but it has like an

old stove like oven where they used to like heat the water because you know back in the 1800s and it's like all empty now obviously but you can like walk through the old like oven where cistern where they had all the water it's all brick it's very creepy um anyway i'm excited to show you whoa christine i'm gonna have to speaking of infrared cameras we're gonna have to buy out like a thousand of them and then i just or maybe baby monitors maybe they do the same thing and they're cheaper but i need to go like but we're about to go play ghost adventures and i'm gonna volunteer to be aaron i'm pretty sure i want to like go hang out in that dentist office of the cistern also the basement, you have to go through a trap door to get down there.

So that'll be part of the fun too. Just a heads up. You might have to help me get down the stairs, but there's a trap door in my living room that you have to open. It's underneath the couch. Realistic. I mean, I kind of blacked out when you said all of that because I just, I think my body was.

I feel like I've told you this before, but. I think I blacked out when you said all of that. Cause I just, I think my body was, I feel like I've told you this before, but I think I blacked out then too. Maybe realistically in the game of ghost adventures, your baby is Aaron. Cause like they did not choose to be here. And also, um, you're like,

oh yeah, go be in this nursery by yourself. Sorry. Shutting the door. Bye. I'm going to get your baby a onesie with Aaron's face on it. No, please don't. Just so they know their place uh no no not gonna happen okay so it'll just have my face on it don't worry so that'll accept black horse in gifted them by king charles there was a manager uh named laura

who says that she was once having tea there and she watched a cup on the shelf move a little bit and then all of a sudden it slid all the way to the very edge of the shelf so if it moved anymore it would have fallen which is such a weird little fuck you it's like it is the ghost intentionally just wanted to give just like stress you out like you almost watch a cup shatter i love the little tear like testing it out like let's see if i can move oh okay let's. Let's push it. Like, are you noticing yet? Oh, you are? Now that you're noticing. Tickle, tickle.

That's awful. Just always wondering if your dishes are about to fall. It's not good. No. She also apparently saw a disembodied hand rearranging their silverware in the restaurant at one point. Oh, no. Which I always love the passive aggressiveness of that. So passive aggressive.

Whenever the ghost is like, let me do it for for you you're clearly not doing it right yep apparently this is in a room where the animals hate going in and they regularly bark at by itself so two other managers who have been at the black horse inn say that the living room one time completely filled with smoke even though no fire had started oh dear but like it was bad enough that they called 9-1-1 they thought there was a fire and they couldn't find the location but they did say it was weird because the whole time it didn't smell like a fire so that's pretty creepy that you're just in a room filled with smoke and you think you're gonna like probably die of like smoke inhalation and then you find out it's just there was nothing like you go back in the house and nothing was there to begin with.

That's terrifying. Although the fire didn't smell like smoke, there have been bad odors there. There's also been a lot of cold spots. Things move in the corner of your eye and also apparently directly in front of you. Items go missing and then they come back way later, like after you've forgotten that they even went missing. And then people hear footsteps and people's clothes have been tugged on. I like the idea of things going missing until you don't care anymore because it's sort of, like, they want to annoy you to the extreme

that, like, when it matters, it's not going to be there. And then, like, the second you don't care anymore, they're like, fine, have it back. I'll find something new to hide. It also feels like a little kid of like, I want to bother you. But once like you've stopped caring, the game's not fun anymore for me. Like the second it doesn't matter anymore. It's like, well, what's the fun here?

Yeah. Yeah. Anyway, so that just sounds like a really obnoxious ghost. And then there is the Church of St. Nicholas, the parish church of St saint nicholas which apparently is the diocese of canterbury which is pretty cool sounds pretty insane it's from i think the website says that it was from the year 1093 so literally almost a thousand years old this church several of the daring family members are buried there and there are reports of a moving light by the windows. People hear knocking from under the floor,

which is going to be what you hear when I'm in your basement. And I won't let you out of my basement. And then what is there always one of in a ghost story? Let's see. A woman in white, a woman in red, a woman in black. So there's a woman in white and a woman in red. No way. And they both are at the Church of St. Nicholas.

They're competing. And you know what's so stupid about this lady in red? Not to insult her, but... Wow. Not to insult her, but it's so stupid. Well, it's not her fault. It's other people's description of her. What?

That she's called the lady in red, but her and the lady in white are both in white. Like, did she spill, like, spaghetti sauce? Like, why do they call her... She's called the lady in red, but her and the lady in white are both in white. Did she spill like spaghetti sauce? Like why are they calling her? Is she Christine? Is it me? Hold on. She apparently was holding a rose when she was buried.

That's not the same. Was holding a rose either when she was buried or there was a rose on her coffin when she was buried. I feel like you could call her something creepy like the rose lady. Like that alone is creepy. Why add in red? Or also like, why don't you just say like blonde and brunette or something else? Like some other factor.

Like why? It's like every story is so determined to have a fucking lady in red that they were like, she's not even in red, but we're going to get her to her. What if her accessories is red? I guess we'll just make that count. Yeah. Okay. So anyway, lady in red that they were like she's not even in red but we're gonna get accessories is red i guess we'll just make that count yeah okay so anyway lady in red she's often seen in the churchyard the difference here is the lady in red is seen outside the lady in white is seen inside okay

so in the 1970s i'll get back to the lady in red the lady in white in a second but this is my favorite story from this church is that apparently in the 70s there was a group of investigators who like kind of schmoozed their way into letting the reverend let them in and stay at the church overnight and the they stayed all night and the next day when the reverend his name was john pittock he let them out and he was like oh like did anything happen they said literally nothing happened it was so boring all they did that whole night was just like hang out with the dog and then the reverend went we don't have a dog okay that's pretty wild that's yeah i just got chills the worst part is like with a dog it's one thing if you're like oh i was hanging out with like that guy who like sat in the shadows and told us his tale like that's creepy enough but when a with a dog like you know we all know how i would be with a dog that was friendly very

alive like it's like very very like not only in your face but at part like literally like up against your fucking mouth a lot of times because if i saw a dog who wanted to hang out with me i'd be cupping its little furry face i'd be kissing its nose i'd be going and it's dead it's a ghost it's not even real i don't understand that how you yeah that's really wild that's pretty creepy did it have dog breath even like i wonder you know were they like wow this dog's breath is pretty amazing and then they should have known fetch did it carry something back did it did you rub its belly like what happened here like that's a lot of physical interaction i would think with a dog yes agreed like that's insane so apparently the dog didn't

exist which also makes me wonder if you weren't part of that group and you were just kind of like watching from another room did they all look like they were like mining playing with a dog anyway talking in like puppy speak to like nobody except a bunch of other men but what does that tell you about like the like the ghosts there immediately know that the people in the in the church like the investigators all the ghosts know that they were probably super nice people because all you hear from them all night is going oh you were a little cute boy sweet so it's like i mean that's a great way for the ghosts to vet us and like how to send the dog in yeah it's like

do we even want to haunt this person because what if they treated that ghost dog like crap and then the other ghosts come in saying like don't fuck with my dog and then you get that's a good excuse for like now i can fuck with these people they bad mouth my dog back to the lady in red and in Red and the Lady in White. So the Lady in Red was, I don't know if this was like part of tradition back then. I feel like I have never heard of this before. So but both of them, I guess they were respected in the area. And they weren't just buried in one coffin. They were buried in like layers of coffins. What do you mean so they were the lady in red and also to be fair i don't know if this is like it's true about one and inspired lore about the other or if this is true for both of them but at least with one of the women sources said the lady

in red she was allegedly buried in a coffin made of oak and then seven more coffins made out of lead oh like around her like one of those like the dolls in a box in a box in a box yeah yeah oh i thought you meant um like she was dismembered and buried no no no no i mean like respectful at all when when isma wants to put kuzco as a flea in a box yeah yeah correct so wait okay that sounds more like she's a vampire in my that sounds like some vampire shit right or maybe it's because i don't know when she died but my best guess without any information is i know that like pluckley really i saw that in their history they really suffered during like the plague so maybe they thought that sickness thing maybe this was part of their routine when people would die during the plague because maybe they thought like a sickness thing maybe this was part of their

routine when people would die during the plague because there's like a lot of work or yeah or maybe it was like just so you didn't smell decomp i don't know but like seven lead coffins like that sounds to me like something bad that sounds like they wanted her to never be able to come back. To never come back. And then they're like, here's a rose. Bye. It just seems such a weird combination. A little for your troubles. Yes, like toss it in.

Oh, my God. And then apparently, so one of them was an oak coffin with seven lead coffins around it. Another one was an oak coffin with three lead ones around it i don't know if that's what truly two different stories or if i'm saying the same thing about both people right just a game of telephone kind of ruined the accuracy but still weird i don't understand and they're both in white except one got a rose also like lol to the lady in white who apparently like no one needs to remember that she got a rose yeah wow the lady in red is said to be in the churchyard she's seen there most often walking around and some lore says that she's looking for her kid

for like i guess she had a stillborn child and so they say that she's looking for her her kid oh no but the lady in white the one that's seen inside she has not only been seen on the church property but she's also been seen on other properties of the daring so of the daring family oh weird okay so apparently this church there's rumors that there was once a secret passageway or secret tunnel that led to one of the daring's manners excuse me how fucking cool is that i know i know so the ghost can travel the path the secret path that's like shit that's like the coolest part of it all that is that like apparently she's like i'm bored of the church today but luckily like this building and this building are connected via tunnel so i have access to it

fucking cool is that so lady in white is doing a lot better than lady in red and she's still trying to get out of the last lead coffin probably she's like i'm almost there the ultimate escape yeah and so the lady in white she gets a change of scenery from time to time and she's been seen at the surrenden daring manor which I guess has now burnt down. But up until it burnt down, people were seeing her in the library. There was one time where a guy named Walter Winans, who apparently was like a multi Olympic medalist. Fun fact. Whoa.

He was visiting the Surrendan daring manor and he was walking through the halls and saw the lady in white standing there apparently so walter winans he his olympic medals came from shooting so i don't know if that if he was like proud or something and he was like it sounds to me like he was walking around in the halls with his rifle for no reason. I don't know if he was like carrying it around hoping someone would stop and ask him what was up and then and then he'd be like oh I'm an Olympian. I don't know what the deal was. Can you see all the medals around my neck that I also wear everywhere I go? Right. Can you see all the medals around my neck that I also wear everywhere I go?

Right. Or he was, like, alone in the house and, like, for protection was carrying a gun around in the house. I don't understand. But he saw the lady in white in the library. He freaked out and shot her. Because there was an intruder. Which, like, so, again, why were you carrying a gun at all and also clearly you were in a state where you were looking to shoot something because like what if it had just been like some lady who was like oh i'm just in the library looking at some books and you just

was the librarian yeah well you shot her so i'm like okay you're an olympic medal card holding gun shooter but also like you clearly like you're like trigger happy you know yeah that's exactly it your instincts like were not like diffused at all like you were like maybe you need to remember you're not at the olympic games anymore yeah anyway thank god this was a ghost that he shot at let's just be happy for that i hope he had a little like like nerve to him later where he went oh my god i literally just i hope he had a moment of self-reflection yeah was that his first person or like did he maybe he heard sounds downstairs and he was freaking out so he got a gun to go that's the other thing like maybe he heard an intruder and and went right but still

i'm like still i'm like um it's not even your house like it's you're staying there right like he's not like he lived there i like to think if i had a gun and if i if someone broke into the house i would still hesitate with like my morals of like am i prepared to shoot a person even if it's for self-defense what are you doing here yeah yeah so anyway i don't know i don't know but it was it was just weird that the story gives no context they're like oh yeah he was walking in the halls with his gun and then he sees the lady in white and then he shoots her and i'm like whoa like don't worry he had an olympic gold medal what yeah you too actually so anyway because she was a ghost the bullet went right through her and then she vanished fair enough if i were her i'd vanish too so people think that the lady in white might have

been a baroness um some say that she might be related to the lady in red that they might be sisters or mother daughter or something there's a lot of rumors about who they are and how they got there but that's what you need to know about them. The next place is called the Greystones, but apparently that name was changed from the Rectory Cottage. So now it's the Greystones. Okay. This house has been around since 1863 and a monk lived there. And he is now known to haunt the trees like a little monkey. A monk-y.

I know, that's what i was thinking i was like it's a great play on words there m you didn't even do it on purpose sometimes the comedy just writes itself so apparently this monk fell in love with a neighbor's daughter and are they allowed to do that i don't think so i think this was just like kind of like a rogue monk. I guess it depends on a rogue monk in the trees. Oh my god, help. That sounds terrifying. Apparently he fell in love with the neighbor's daughter, who I guess fell in love with him too. And so they would regularly walk the paths together and talk.

And I guess maybe that was all they were allowed to do. I don't know. So at the same time that he was falling in love with the neighbor's daughter who was falling in love with him this monk had it going on because there was a woman nearby who was also pining after him that's been one hot tree monk he was like just uh he was a a monk one hot did you hear it a monk hunk okay he's one hunk of a monk how about that don't you he's uh hunky monkey if you will also fun fact i'm pretty sure hunky monkey was the name that ben and jerry's came out with when like gay marriage became like a thing like because they have chunky monkey yeah yeah i think

it was a hunky monkey well chunky monkey is my favorite flavor of Ben and Jerry's. So I don't know. They did some play on of chunky monkey as like a celebration. Oh, no, it was chubby hubby. Chubby hubby. I like hunky monkey, though. Apparently that's a type of strain of kush. Oh, well, I'm glad someone's using the rhyme.

cush oh well i'm glad someone's using the rhyme so um anyway so the so this other woman happened to be in love with him she is known as a separate ghost so uh she is known as the lady of rose court and sometimes an other website she was known as the tutor woman uh tutor like tutor tutor yeah i just said it weird tutor woman so the lady of rose court and tutor woman are the same person oh okay but apparently people will see the a ghost of the monk walking on the same path as the woman or walking on the same path that he used to go on with the woman he was in love with people will hear a man and a woman talking and laughing together. People will just see like his apparition floating by. But then as for the Lady of Rose Court, Tudor woman who never got the chance,

the third wheel, apparently she is also a ghost, but she died from, I guess, a broken heart of never getting to be with the monk and so oh my she poisoned herself she sorry whoa she either made herself a drink out of poisonous berries juice or she was just straight up eating the poisonous berries like didn't take the other step of making the drink she just ate so she didn't die of a broken heart she died by suicide she yeah the broken heart is what led to the official death sorry i literally just like choked on my own are you also eating some poisonous berry cheese i might be it feels a little bit like it so apparently when she died she couldn't take the pain ate these berries she was looking out the window she was found as if she had been

looking out the window and watching them walk around oh taylor swift's you belong with me seriously so dark so they say she died around four or five in the afternoon which is how do you say that four or five do you say is four afternoon for you or like like when does night begin for you i would say like four or five to me is still afternoon. I feel like maybe five to six, six to seven is evening. I don't know. To me, four is afternoon and five is night. Night?

Not even like evening? Well, obviously I divvy things up by meals. And by five, it's appropriate to have dinner. So I just think of it as night. I agree that. Well, five usually to me is happy hour so it's like pre-dinner yeah okay that's fair yeah four at four o'clock i say good afternoon and at five i would say like good evening maybe instead of good night what's the difference between

that's what i said evening did you i was not listening sorry i know okay i would say i would agree then i would say evening yeah evening yeah yeah yeah so anyway four in the afternoon to five in the evening that's when they say that she died and so now only in that like span of time will she ever haunt the area which i love that she's like on the clock and like she and she only has like a two-hour work. So good for her. Kind of nice. Girl boss. She's from four to five. You can hear a woman's voice. You can see objects moving. And you can also hear the sound of dogs every now and then.

Because I guess that was also the time when the dogs would get fed. Oh. So you can hear dogs or you can hear her. There's also the watercress lady. Oh. She has apparently when she was alive, she liked to go to the stream and collect watercress to sell to the village. And she was known as my least favorite compliment, eccentric. That and quirky.

I'm like, ugh, quirky. Quirky, I understand why it comes off a little gross but i don't have as big of a problem with it as eccentric just because i don't have my like childhood trauma from being called eccentric by every friend's parent so every time i hear eccentric now i'm like i get it i'm loud and annoying it's always like rich old people that's so weird oh eccentric to me it means quirky i mean i think they're similar but i feel like i've always heard like oh he was an eccentric like art collector with interesting i i know that's i i've also heard it that way i think i just get sensitive about it and i hear like quirky in a bad way the word i got voted by my classmates in third grade was weird so oh you know i don't know they all mean the same thing to me really it was just always

crazy four four four uh so the watercress lady she liked to end her days as we all do sitting on the bridge drinking gin and smoking her pipe oh hell yeah i feel like she had some cool stories i'm into that one night though she fell asleep doing this and the gin poured onto her clothes and the pipe caught her shirt on fire and she woke up she woke up to being burned alive what holy shit yeah that was a a fast left turn sorry wow that's horrible um so now by the bridge at pinnick pinnick bridge people see an apparition of someone that apparently sometimes glows pink um sometimes she's a mist that's still smoking her pipe and sitting by the bridge and sometimes there's this was only a one reference but okay she's still on fire see

i like the idea that she's still just smoking her pipe and drinking. Like she just is enjoying the good times, you know, but the fire. I will say that the fire thing I only saw on one website. The is often seen as a mist sitting on the bridge still smoking a pipe was like for sure the more. Let's hope for that. I hope for that for her. It seems to be the more common lore. So fingers crossed that's what she's up to. There's also the forest in Pluckley called Daring Wood because it's on the Daring property.

Love it. Although it's also known as Screaming Wood because of all of the screams people hear in here. Why? It's just a lot of screaming. No. One of the screams is known to be so loud and unexpected that birds will panic and fly away oh geez and birds are like i'm just trying to live my life this person keeps screaming at random intervals there's a tiktok trend right now where you get like

it's usually i'm in heteronormative terms uh what seems like women tricking their boyfriends but there's a TikTok trend right now where you wait until they're really concentrated on something and then out of nowhere play the song I Feel Good but it starts with that guy going ow I feel good but you like start on the ow when they're not expecting it

and just watching them freak out I imagine that's how the birds feel right now and if this were like still happening in real time someone's making a tiktok of it while the birds fly away these poor birds always the victims so uh in the forest there is one area called the fright corner oh no because apparently there people will see the apparition of a dead body leaning against the tree with a sword stabbed through him. What? So he's known as the Highwayman.

Dear God. One reference calls him Robert Dubois, but I didn't hear that. Robert Dubois, not like the boy. Dubois. Not like the baby. Is his rapper name? So Robert Dubois. duboy not like the boy not like not like the baby um so robert duboy but i don't know if that's his real name or fake name or whatever but he's known also as the highwayman him and the watercress lady are the oldest ghost lore apparently but so the highwayman people have seen him in the woods which

is interesting that he's not called like the woods man why is he called the highway man i don't get it maybe he was traveling through maybe he traveled a lot yeah the story has multiple versions but basically it comes down to he was being chased in the woods either by police or like thieves or something and they either cornered him pinned him against the tree and stabbed him with a sword or while being chased he hid inside the tree and they stabbed through the tree into him oh god either way why no either way apparently they still see an apparition of him like they say you still see an apparition of him with a sword through his chest in the horrible um there's also a second ghost in the woods who is a school master his name might have been henry

turf and he died by suicide in the woods apparently the story goes that he had ptsd after world war one and he is he hanged himself and is still his apparition is still seen in the trees oh no there is also a colonel from pluckley who died the same way and he is said to still walk uh on the property they still see him walking back and forth where he died um even though all the trees are gone the property looks completely different you still see this man walking back and forth in the area where he died oh wow there's also a farm that is now actually a hotel uh it's been around since 1406 and this farm slash hotel is where a bunch of prisoners of war were kept during the napoleonic wars um it had some significance during the civil war during world war ii um so just a lot of history

there although it is england you know it's all history so they the current owners somehow didn't know that it was haunted when they bought the place i don't know how you can live in the uk and just be like not like a ghost seer um on their first day of owning the property though they heard a voice uh in the dairy part of the farm and the voice said i will and so the guy was like that's weird so he mentioned it to his neighbor the neighbor showed him a newspaper clipping that one of the previous farmers that lived there shot himself in that same spot and his last words were i will do it so so oh god that's weird goose cam, goose cam. Yeah. Ugh.

The same ghost is apparently still seen walking the property. Sometimes he's even in the hotel, I guess, which I love when they are still running with their own blueprint of things, but, like, now they're in weird places. Like, why are you in the hotel? They walk straight through the refrigerator, and you're like, this is the commode I'm trying to pee. Allegedly, in this hotel i'm sure there's a million other ghost stories of like the lights going on and off the electric the electronics messing up doors opening but the coolest

haunt on this property apparently if you use the wrong light bulb in a socket the light bulb will take itself out and then by the next day it'll be on the other side of the room what i like they don't shatter it but yeah they don't shatter it and the ghost is clearly a maintenance man who's like get that bullshit light bulb away from me like that's not where this goes incandescent all the way man right there's also the bakery where apparently they people hear footsteps in the empty rooms. There are cold spots, people hear the sounds of a horse and carriage being driven towards the building. And what's cool about the horse and carriage is that this isn't the only place that people have encountered this horse drawn carriage ghost. It's been like all over Pleckley. Most of it has been

at a place called Maltman's Hill. But one person saw the carriage with lights coming from the inside. Another said that it passed them on a back road one night. One person said that they heard like hooves on the cobblestone, even though the road wasn't cobblestone anymore. They heard hooves on cobblestone. Wow, I love that. That's cool. And apparently they heard it until it was so loud that you thought the horse had to be next to you and then disappeared.

That's scary. The creepiest one is one person even reported hearing the sound of the carriage and horses from inside their car like the sound was in their car oh which is feels intentional and then there's a guy called the miller and he was actually richard bus who went by dickie bus and apparently he is a there's like a road named after him and all this now but dickie bus he is his ghost is called the miller because his solid black apparition is seen at the abandoned windmill that he used to work at and so the windmill miller so apparently this windmill was near the pinnix pinnox which sounds like it was it's also near the bridge where the watercress lady is but at this windmill you will see an apparition only right before a storm comes through and apparently the reason he haunts this place is because he was the last miller at this

windmill before it got destroyed by a lightning storm so now when there's a new lightning storm it's almost like he's there to warn you a storm's coming in oh no and then there is the screaming clay man who apparently did apparently he did like brick work in the area and either he fell into the clay pit oh and or and or a bunch of the clay bricks fell onto him and he died from like getting oh for god's sakes trampled by the bricks i guess so people say that you can still hear his screams even though they're disembodied you don't know where they're coming from oh god then there's the former hunting lodge called the daring arms and this is haunted by a lady wearing a bonnet apparently she's so solid and looks so real that people mistake her as a customer and the final place is the blacksmith's forge tea room,

which apparently for a while was called the blacksmith's arms. It was also called the specter's arms and the ghost arms just because of how haunted it is. It has three spirits there. One is a cavalier who is a heard and apparently sometimes even seen pacing up upstairs in different rooms there's a maid and a coachman who are both seen by the fire at the bar uh when it i know isn't that cool party it's a party one employee saw like i guess a bunch of mugs were hanging and saw them like move as if someone ran their finger across them. Another employee heard the door open and heard what sounded like someone seating themselves.

And so when they went out to take their order, nobody was there, but the chairs had moved. Apparently, that's, I guess, pretty common that like, it sounds like people are in a room when you're not there. Anyway, two fun facts. In the area, there's the Kent and sussex tea and coffee company and they have some tea that are named after the ghosts at their tea house that's very on brand and for us and just a fun fact pluckley's population is a little over a thousand and with the amount of ghosts that there are that means that the ghost to human ratio is one for

every 89 humans wait that's amazing so anyway that is the story of the ghost screaming clayman is my ghost please thank you you know he seems like if he's just screaming i i feel bad for how he went but like if he's just screaming that feels like a lot less effort in having to like maintain a ghost in your home you know that's true although i guess, that feels like a lot less effort in having to like maintain a ghost in your home, you know? That's true. Although I guess it would be very, like it would never get like easy. You'd always be frightened, I feel like. Yeah, you'd always be on edge.

Like at any moment, there's going to be a massive scream. Especially if you're a podcaster, you're like, I'm really trying to work here, you know? Or maybe I just want the monk who's like just walking around outside. Oh, sorry, the tree monk? The hon tree monkey, the tree, the hunky monkey. Yeah.

Um, I want the dog ghost. Call it. I'm calling it. Oh, wait. Okay. Sorry, everybody calling it.

Actually, you know what? You can have it because apparently you only hear him when it was feeding time. So like, that's fine. That's a loud dog. I'll take it.

I'll take the dog. No, the dog in the church or whatever the dog in the church that they played with damn i'm you already forgot about him no i'm playing with him okay okay okay um but i do have a question yeah which is i know that the the tree monk the ghostly tree monk he haunts the trees it sounds like a dr seuss book but he haunts the trees but why does he have the. Seuss book. He haunts the trees. But why does he haunt the trees? I thought he just like walks the path.

Or is that what they mean? I guess that's what they mean. Between the trees or something. I think they just kind of like in the wooded area or in the land. I thought we were going like, oh, he loved this girl. And then every time somebody saw them, he would like climb up the tree and hide or something like i was thinking like peeping tom status but then like like why else are you up there and like also like go to heaven or something climb this tree and climb up to heaven maybe he's

trying to get to heaven i don't know maybe but yeah i think when they say like i think it's just like haunt the among the trees the trees. Among the trees. Got it, got it, got it. Who's among the trees in Dr. Seuss? Was that Horton? No, that's the Lorax. The Lorax. He's just the Lorax, you know.

He's just the same as the Lorax. It's fine. Yeah. He speaks for the trees. Sort of like a religious Lorax. Yeah. He's a... No, I can't come up with anything.

I was going to try to come up with another pun i couldn't think of things that sound like war acts i think um okay leave that to seuss leave that to the the professionals okay so there's this like crazy thing going on in our house which like maybe it's not crazy maybe i'm crazy i was just telling allison about it it's freaking me out though that we've been getting a lot of flies recently which like it's summer like i get things are coming in through the apartment but like not like a gross amount of flies but like just definitely more flies than normal like i don't know three a week like not a big deal but in the last couple weeks you know how like when flies die they'll like just kind of

like fall wherever they are and land on the floor right or like the the windowsill or something yeah these every like enough that i'm noticing so it's got to be like a decent size number at least compared to what i'm used to in terms of flies around here every fly i have found in the last couple, I would say at least a week, the body of the fly is completely intact, but they don't drop. They're just, they die and just stay on the wall or like stick on the furniture. It's really weird. And I feel like I've never seen that with flies before. Maybe I'm just noticing it for the first time,

but I feel like they're turning into like little statues. And just like freezing in place, like freezing in place like freezing they were standing yeah it's super weird because there's been like a bunch of times i've like tried to come at them with the fly swatter and they didn't react and then i kind of said like a hello like are you gonna fight me on this aren't you playing and then when i hit them like they threw the fly swatter they feel like hardened like they like like they dried like they dried up it's really weird and it's really freaking me out but anytime i've seen a fly now i just saw one i did and i went into rj's room and um and put it in there no i went to go i went

to go get a coaster but on his bed i saw a fly sitting there and i was like i'm gonna just wave and see if this fly even goes anywhere and it's just sitting on like on the on the side like on a part of his like bed frame where he should have fallen once he died a second did you just have the place exterminated it's probably because of that i so i would like to think that that's probably what this one fly instance was but like this has been happening since before we got the exterminator it's really weird it's really weird anyway do you have a carbon monoxide detector i'm like freaked out now oh i am too i was like is this like climate change like are they like climate change it's like are they drying out because of the heat or something what if this was the one thing that like finally

you were like climate change has gone too far two dead flies on my sofa anyway that's such a stupid thing to bring up but i i just like it's really it is freaky it's it's like a amityville tiny little minuscule amityville going on they're just turning into little figurines it's so gross anyway statuettes umikes. Well, what a horrific interlude. Thank you, Em. Oh, we're going to keep that in the show. Great. I don't know.

Probably because I don't feel like cutting it out. I can already tell in the future. Also, speaking of things we're not cutting out, we never mentioned that our merch is going on sale. So oops. Oh my gosh. We never. Okay.

Yeah. So let's talk about it. Let's talk about it. Because I know a lot of you like to skip the intro okay we know you do that very rude so we actually caught you prime time right here we're actually just gonna spring this on you in the middle of the show um we are putting our so our merch we're we're doing a deep clean of our merch let's put it that way that's a good way a spring cleaning but really like a prepping for the fall like an early halloween special our right of our uh prime

time we're preparing for like our prime which is the fall the the the autumnal time um and so we're otherwise known as the fall um and we're getting rid of our old merch and so we're putting it on sale i think on two tuesday i don't know early this week tuesday or wednesday if you're listening to this when this comes out you will we'll be posting about it online and yeah it'll come up any day now but it's gonna be like i think up to 50 off on yeah i think so 50 off and it's limited time because it's just whatever's left so um yeah you know and then we're gonna try to overhaul like just come up with some fun new stuff um to to take the place of the old merch so exactamundo

last chance last chance if you've been looking at some stuff and you're like oh i wish it were 50 off well guess what it's about to be so heard your prayers we're here we've heard your cries all right well uh tell me your story but before you do i'm gonna crack my little drink open oh my gosh great idea i have my little iced coffee that wasn't as fun that didn't quite work like it used to you know yesterday i totally forgot i actually brought this little remember i was drinking this san palgrino i brought it up close so that i could crack it open and then i like did it before we recorded it and i was like that was the whole point um well excuse my weird faces because i've never had this before it was a surprise from allison and is it a t java uh no but it looks like that actually it

i think it's probably from the same company but they don't it just says t on it okay i was like you're not gonna like it because it's coffee um no it's so it's it was a good call on her end because it does sound like something i would like but it i'm a little scared what is uh it's earl grey tea okay we're cool with that we can't see it oh i wasn't here oh sorry i thought you were trying to show it oh just kidding it's all blurry yeah it's earl grey tea but it also is blood orange infused sounds sounds good but i'm always scared to try new things so sorry if my face is a little you're afraid of change i really am meanwhile like anything with a weird combination put it in my mouth i'll eat it if it's sardines and sadness i want that shit sardine and sadness sandwich that's my dream dried fly sculptures the next time somebody says like do you have any pregnancy cravings i'd be like sardines

and sadness sandwich please it's just two actually while we're at it one to go yeah all right so tell me your village story my little village person i would be happy to sorry my dog's now barking or it could be the ghost who knows it could be my new ghost dog that i've just adopted here i'm gonna try this for everyone since we're not doing anything oh you don't like oh you do like you're doing you're doing a kombucha face um i think by the end of this i will really enjoy it really okay but currently i do not like it no i just i'm gonna have to wean myself into the enjoyment part of it oh interesting okay wow um it's better than the second yeah okay we're gonna we're gonna get into it by the end it'll be my favorite drink i've ever had so you're going to ask them to send you another care package and a blanket.

I'll just be like, don't watch my first reaction to it. We're going to just ignore that part. It's irrelevant. It's weird. It's like a creamsicle and tea had a baby. It's very odd. Oh, that is odd. I can't actually picture what that would taste like.

I don't know. Yeah, I'm really starting to dig it all of a sudden. Oh, good. All right. Well, I do, as your little village person, have a creepy village story for you, which is just such a strange little coincidence. Quinky dink. So this is in Mexico. We are near the city of Ciudad Victoria.

Oh, I guess I should tell you what it's called. So this is the story of Magdalena Solis, a. priestess of blood dun dun dun wait the high priestess of blood yeah oh my god oh that's so fun uh I mean it's probably not it's not but you know it is I think in an entertainment value the story itself will be one i want to listen to oh it's a it's a stunner i will say it's okay i mean you have to do a lot of damage to get that kind of name so yeah it doesn't come easily i would imagine that kind of name um you have to earn it and she did so we're in mexico mexico near the city of ciudad vict in Tamaulipas. And we're in a smaller village. So kind of like your Kent degrees of separation. We're in an even smaller village nearby, or in

the area called Yerba Buena. And I want to apologize. There's a lot of terms that I'm going there are a lot of terms that I'm going to probably butcher um this is a lot of spanish mexican spanish specifically i'm going to probably sound like a real tool and i apologize um but i'm gonna try a for effort a for effort thank you maybe for effort we'll see your yerba buena yerba buena yes okay so this is 1962 uh so ways back um and the population of this tiny little town village if you will is 50 people very small there's no access to electricity no telephones completely isolated village um and it's actually technically called an ejido which um in mexico translates to a sort of communal farm so it's sort of like like 20 families are living there and they're all kind of farming and sustaining themselves

in this little town. It is like a little commune so far. Yeah, yeah, it is sort of like a little commune. Not in like the hippie sense necessarily, but like in the government-funded farm town. The team building. Team building. Yes.

So charming. So in Yerba Buena, alongside the no electricity farm town the team building the team building yeah yes so charming so in yerba buena alongside the no electricity or telephones sorry now there's somebody at the door it's like don't worry i scared him real good and then you're gonna say that wasn't necessary my friend this is why we put you how dare you he's like you do you know what that mailman would have done no what would he have done tell me for once tell me tell me what would have happened tell me something i wouldn't have wanted to happen other than him approaching us with the mail and giving me food for you that i feed you geo it's always like his food like it's like being his fancy ass food being delivered and i'm like do you even realize like how your chewy box is here what is wrong with you it's like being his fancy ass food being delivered and i'm like do you even realize

like how your chewy box is here what is wrong with you it feels like like a kid like cussing out the pizza man even though he brought your dinner it's like yeah it's like go away go away it's like i'm trying to feed you you don't even have to pay for it it's like if i wasn't here you would find a way to complain about it too so i know exactly that there's like riddle me that my friend there's no winning okay i apologize the person has left so in yerba buena alongside the no electricity or telephone situation there also weren't any schools any police any churches this is like teeny tiny like off the grid okay like really just its own space and nothing else okay and so a lot of the people there were illiterate because they just never learned to read or write um there wasn't much schooling and there wasn't

really much to do at all except farm and sell any leftover produce um to nearby towns so work work work work and farm and work some more um doesn't sound like a utopia kind of farmland to me but i have to work work work but okay good for them day to day live in live in life you know same people same yeah so that gives you a good setup for what's going to happen now the story gets pretty wild so you need to bear with me and and let me know if anything is unclear okay i fucking love when the stories come with a caveat of like let me know when it gets a little too crazy. Let me know when you're like, what the fuck are you talking about? Let me know when I need to start again.

So please tell me if you need help understanding because you might. Okay. Okay. Perfect. We're going to start now. Okay. Okay. Two outsiders.

They're a pair of brothers named Santos and and cayetano hernandez hernandez but i'm gonna say that's just not gonna work with my mouth for the rest of the show okay um rode into yerba buena in 1962 okay and it's sort of like pied piper where they show up and like just fuck shit up like they just show up in this town and they're like oh look a nice little self-sustaining happy town happy village we're gonna fucking like upend this place oh wow okay so they show up in 1962 they were known around mexico to be scammers uh who spent the early 60s traveling around mexico and conning people in small towns out of money and then moving on to their next target so

like sort of like this highway man highway robbery kind of situation they just travel along and like scam people okay on the way they get to yerba buena and they thought it was going to be their easiest mission yet it's tiny ass town they're like ah this will do small potatoes small potatoes small bean and corn tater tots tots. Small tater tots. So they have the perfect ploy for this poor little town. Oh, God. Okay. They gather the villagers and proclaim to them that they are prophets sent by Inca gods.

Oh, God. Okay. Who would soon return to Earth. And so this town needed to listen to them because they're here to spread the word of the incan gods wow okay and i'm sure they i see now why you uh said earlier like they're illiterate and things like that so maybe they're not getting a lot of other yeah it's sort of like they're primed for an outsider to come in and to be manipulated yeah they're correct they can't get their info in a lot of other places exactly and they're cut off from a lot of like other resources so it's like they're they're not

able to like call anyone and be like what's going on here yeah exactly i'm already i'm already seeing the problems here yeah there's some big big big problems and m i mean we end up at the high priestess of blood so like it's really out of control i I forgot about her. Oh my God. I know. She's like the lady in red, but like times a million. Like she puts the lady in red to shame because wow. She keeps me buried with a lot of lead coffins. She's every lady in red we've ever discussed. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Like morphed into like the ultimate red lady. So these brothers show up and they're like we're actually prophets from the Incan gods and uh I'm gonna tell you a little bit from Britannica the uh the encyclopedia about the Incan empire just to give some idea so it was the largest empire in pre-Columbian America and in common with other Andean cultures the Inca left no written records so their history is known chiefly from the oral tradition that has been preserved through the generations by official memorizers. And from the written records composed after the Spanish conquest. The Inca religion combined features of animism, fetishism, and the worship of nature gods.

And the pantheon was headed by Inti, the sun god. Viracoca, a creator, god, and culture hero. And Apu Iapu, the rain god virakoka a creator god and culture hero and apu iapu the rain god damn and under the empire the inca religion was a highly organized state religion um so it was like pretty much like required of people to follow this religion okay and their rituals included elaborate forms of divination and the sacrifice of both animals and humans oh i was really on board up until that okay yeah yeah it was like yeah yeah that's pretty cool okay everything's like whoa and then it's like oh whoa okay whoa whoa whoa slow down um yeah so

there's sacrifice which always gets to like when blaze and i were in now it's me being the white person like when i was visiting no but when i right when we went to um belize we saw this these mayan ruins which was like the coolest thing i've ever done but it was like so neat and like just so culturally fascinating and they're like and this right here this platform is where they would like behead the the the sacrifice yes and i'm like oh wow oh good this is we're in the middle of this cave like a mile in and they're like anyway here's where they would like we're in the middle of this cave like a mile in and they're like anyway here's where they would like sacrifice people i respect what you did but also like that scares me too like i'm like i'm just like a little on edge now being in this cave like a mile from civilization but i will say obviously this is not to discount it's like what right we did like you know showing up and uh

demolishing and decimating people is not any better than human sacrifice to be no like we we have as black widow would say some red in our ledger and by some i mean like we are basically the high priestess of blood so we are the high priestess of blood like we are the we don't get to fucking talk exactly just because something is different doesn't mean it is like completely where completely where we are, what we fucking did. Completely. So I'm not saying, like, ew, you know, but it's like, oh, my. Like, it just.

It's different. It goes from, like, fascinating to, like, oh, dark. It's pretty little dark. So, yeah, they did have human and animal sacrifice. And the religious institutions were destroyed by, well, not shockingly, by the Spanish conquerors campaign against idolatry. So, you know, the Spanish came in and they're like, how dare you now follow our religion? Right, right, right. Classic move. So, yes. Just, you know, how history goes over and over and over again. So the brothers show up and they're like okay so those gods right like all y'all know about them we're actually prophets sent down by them and we are also high priests of the quote

powerful and exiled inca gods and in exchange for worship and tribute the inca gods will shower you the people of yerba buena with treasures if you respect us and like bow down to us and let us kind of show up and lead you. Like, you will be treasure. You know, you'll be blessed by the gods. It's not, this is no mistake. Like, you're going to have a, it's going to be a good call if you just do what we want. You just got to, you just got to help out and then you'll get everything you've ever dreamed of.

So it wasn't that simple because the brothers also told everyone that the Inca gods would be coming down to earth soon and any non-believers would be punished eternally punished i should add so like if you're not gonna be on board like you're fucked basically is what they're saying right doesn't leave that much room these these poor you know folks who are just trying to mind their own business yeah it feels a lot like a lot of god-fearing people today of like you better or else or else eternal punishment which one do you want to pick right now everyone else is doing it would you rather burn in hell forever exactly so to fully convince the audience what they were saying was true um they used they used like obviously like big rhetoric and you know they used like manipulative language but they also

used sleight of hand tricks i was literally gonna say i was like was there like a magic show because i magic show because i was thinking um not that religion was involved but the davenport brothers and the fox sisters how they like would travel around and like really convince people the second you said like to prove or to show i was like oh there's a visual here and it's for sure magic 100 and again like these people have been isolated from any sort of other resources so even though it's the 60s and there's like tv and you know phones like they don't have access to that so they don't you know they don't necessarily understand that this is like just trickery honestly what a genius tool though to try to

convince somebody that like things that like are not as they seem you know exactly so like snake oil sellers but uh of like their god that they're gods i don't know i don't know they're quite vernacular for that but uh-huh yeah it worked let's just put it that way so the villagers were like holy shit uh i guess we have to do what they say yeah and they handed over food money resources they treated the brothers like kings in order to get the treasure from the incan gods that was promised to them and when morale started to dip and skeptics were like um i don't know, this is a little fishy. The brothers made time to lead Incan rituals for the villagers to partake in. And now we remember the rituals that I listed earlier of like how far they could go.

So, well, first, the rituals just included like cannabis, animal sacrifices to the gods. Like they tried to make this look as like real and powerful as they could and it got to the point where the villagers had handed over everything they had everything like they didn't have any resources left and by this point the brothers were on such a power trip that even though they were out of offerings they were like well we can't leave now like we own these people right right right yeah we've gotten far enough where like we can get whatever we want we've accidentally created ourselves a kingdom like we literally demanded that these people worship us and like they do now so we can't leave almost like it was too easy which is really sad like it is and it's like when

they leave elsewhere what are they gonna do start over they're... Yeah, why wouldn't you just stay at your established kingdom where you're seen as a god? In your existing kingdom. Are you kidding? Exactly. So what they did... This is just where it gets really fucked, Em. Oh. They began demanding more and more.

The Yerba Buena community had essentially become slaves to the brothers. They could demand anything and it would be done straight away to like the two kings that were there um it got to the point where the brothers started demanding the prettiest women and by that i mean oftentimes girls as young as 14 to perform sexual acts on them um and to the parents of the younger girls they prayed on they said they were doing this because they needed to learn about sex from these like quote-unquote high priests and how lucky should they be that exactly they've been chosen by literal gods yes and messengers of the gods right to be the ones to teach you on your sexual journey of all the blessings that will be bestowed upon you if you let this happen yeah think of how uh

attractive you'll be to your future suitor if they know that your first time was with a god you know yeah you've given yourself to the excuse me inking gods so precisely according to um a medium article by delaney bartlett uh once their sexual wants had been fulfilled the brothers this is so bad would then sell the girls to traffickers who would send the girls to border towns and force them into sex work so it wasn't even just like you know contained within this community it was like once they got what they wanted they were like now we can make money off of them by sending them off because they're no longer virgins or whatever so like trafficking them literally fully human trafficking trafficking. Yes. So. Holy shit.

Wow. You very quickly. You're right. I'm telling you. It's so fucking dark. Wow. Okay. That shit.

And also because all because like their thought process was like, well, now what? And like it was like to like kill time or like get rid of evidence. It's not like this was the plan all along. It's not like they went here for the purpose of trafficking it was just like well we need something we need something to do yeah yeah really really really fucked up so they would send the girls to the border towns force them into sex work and the brothers didn't just demand sex from the young girls they also demanded sex from basically anyone at any time and the villagers just had to obey um and after a time their rituals

began to include sex like they would turn in these huge orgies um so this town is just going like upside down like i feel like if you visited the town and then like a year later you came back you were like what happened in the year that i was gone here things do not look the same i imagine well i don't know if you know this and i don't know if maybe i'm supposed to know this and what i'm not i'm just not reading the room but is this a situation where people are happy to be doing this because they feel like they're fulfilling i don't think so okay i think this is like they've been coerced and now it's like too late if that makes sense okay so like even they know that something's up they don't feel like they've been coerced and now it's like too late if that makes sense okay so like even they know that something's up they don't feel like they're like they were blessed by a god

i'm sure i'm sure some people probably believed it but i think there were enough people who were like but like what are you gonna do like you're fucked because they're literally well because i selling people and the one thing i cannot wait for you to cover one day and like maybe even like if we ever do like a switch again i and i get to cover a true crime or something i would uh i still want you to do warren jeff's oh yeah that's a good one and a lot of his followers it's like kind of it at one point was at least split down the middle where half of them were like so grateful for all the weird sexual assignments they had versus like or that like they had to sleep with this person versus this person. But then there were other people who were like, I'm married to someone I actually really love. And now I'm like forced into this or like I'm going to go to hell.

And like, right. My husband has to see me off and like watch me go be with somebody else. It's really awful. And like, that's a good point and i feel like there's a blurred line between like uh you totally are skeptic and you're like this person is fucking us over and also like um i don't know if this is real maybe it's real but i have to go with it because everybody else is going with it and i don't want to be punished yeah i'm sure and there's also people there was also people yeah like right down the middle of the road where they're like they didn't feel violated but they were like well you know i'm

just doing it because that's like my job that's my duty and this is what we do now i guess and like not even like aware that like they have the the say to not do like it it's just really sad so i don't know where these people stood i don't't know. And I mean, you know, it's a really small town, 20 different families. What did I say? How many people? 50 people. A lot. Not a lot.

Not a lot. Yeah, 50 people. So I'm sure there was a mix. I imagine there would be a mix of both of people who were like, I don't want to sell my child into sex trafficking, obviously. Fair enough. I didn't. Hopefully that didn't come off as too ignorant.

I just know. No, I don't think so. I mean, you know someone someone probably felt like my kid's the chosen one and now they get to go do this work for their gods so i mean i'm sure that that's how they played it at least so you know i don't i don't know who believed what but either way they were in too deep for lack of a better term yeah yeah yeah and they didn't want to anger the brothers um they didn't want to disobey them and just if this maybe adds to to your question uh a little bit they were also being fed psychoactive drugs regularly by the that does answer some things so that could have tweaked maybe people's mindsets so it got to a point after three months of this where the villagers question why

they still hadn't received any treasures right so they're they're thinking like okay yeah we're on board we've done everything you asked like when do these supposed treasures from the inkan gods show up but as soon as this thought even formed the brothers had already planned for this because they were like well we want to make this last as long as possible and they knew eventually obviously they'd be like where's our prize yeah um so in order to keep this style of living they had to go find a god or goddess to they already have two they know they're the prophets emothy of the gods okay okay sorry they're the high priests now they need a real deity to show up so can't do it okay yeah they they were like we already found one we have the perfect plan okay they told the villagers uh it was time for them to speak to the incan gods

and promised that they would be back soon with their own goddess in hand and this is where magdalena solis shows up so magdalena solis was an 18-year-old sex worker who had been forced into the trade at the age of 12 under the management of her brother. Jesus Christ. Yeah. A pimp named Eliazar. And alongside her earnings in the trade, apparently she had a keen interest in the paranormal. cult was uh working the sex trade was making extra cash through her work as a fortune teller in medium and claimed to be able to channel the spirits of brujas witches okay the brothers found magdalena in monterey which had become uh unfortunately the place where they would sell

off the girls to sex trafficking got it so that's where they were sending the girls from yerba buena buena but then they went to that town to bring back magdalena who also lived there and the brothers plan was to convince a sex worker to return to them in the guise of her being an incan goddess so magdalena was like huh this piques my interest basically yeah why Why not? Give me something to do. Give me something to do. I'll bring my tarot cards, I guess. So she was on board, and they headed back to Yerba Buena together. But they had to give, obviously, if they're bringing a deity to these people,

they had to make it look as convincing as possible. Yeah. So when the brothers returned returned they summoned everyone to a cave which now is reminding me of my little belizean cave uh where they played out one of their normal rituals but at one point they created a smoke screen and then when the smoke dissipated seemingly by magic there was magdalena standing oh i see smoke was they did like a smoky entrance you know the old smoke and mirrors the old literal smoke and mirrors exactly so uh she was there it was the reincarnated aztec goddess kwatli kwe kwatli kwe i think is how you say it okay accompanied by her brother

like okay i guess he had to come to her p aka brother. Oh, like actually truly her brother came. Oh, yeah. Her brother, Eleazar, whom the other brothers called a high priest. So like her brother, aka the pimp who had sold her into sex trade, sex slavery, was there too. I guess he probably demanded to come along. And he was called the high priest. And Magdalena was called Kwatlikwe, which is like this Aztec goddess. I don't know why they didn't go with an incan goddess weren't they supposed to be with you know they didn't

think it through they didn't think maybe they just didn't i mean it worked so i guess whatever they did worked um i don't know i don't know why i'm questioning it but uh the villagers were just aghast like they were in awe of this woman they were like this is our new queen um they doted on her from the second she appeared she was given a ton of weed and peyote which she was like from then on constantly on drugs and she was just being like just offered you know constant weed so far it's love so far it sounds like she kind of hit the lottery yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah like from she's from where she was now she's like just being treated like literal royalty yeah and also like i'm still confused about like why her brother is there that

like they have to make a deal with him i imagine since he was the one who was profiting off her working in the sex trade that they he probably was part of the package deal he was like he's my girl if i could i can't imagine if he's like selling her to people and then someone comes up and says like hey can she be treated like royalty and not you yeah yeah you're not part of it exactly i'm sure he was like this is a i have a feeling he was part of the package like either i come or nothing yeah that's what i guess i love that they're like you can be a high priest like us i guess right yeah all right so magdalena was like living the high life literally and figuratively um she was blissfully being like doted upon by the villagers and soon it got to a point where i don't know if it was the drugs or just like to the the attention but she literally began to believe herself that she was a goddess

like she took this on as like a very very real persona and i mean good for you i guess yeah girlfriend get it self-care confidence yeah i don't know maybe you take it a little far but that's okay uh so she truly believed she was the aztec goddess kwatli kwe who gave birth to the sun and the stars reincarnated so she started to believe like wow you know she believed that she was the reincarnate version of this goddess and like she deserved all of this praise this wasn't a trick this wasn't like um smoke and mirrors also to be fair she was like significantly spending time like a lot of her time on drugs though right that's right yeah exactly like peyote like so i too would think i was like she was the high priestess yes the high

living the high life is the high priestess exactly um. So the brothers, like, I guess as much as they had prepared, they were not prepared for this level of delusion. Like, they prepared that she would be, like, play along in their trick. But then they were like, oh, no, she actually believes this. Like, she doesn't totally remember that this is all, like, a big joke. Or, like, not a joke, but, like, a big trick. Finally, it took this long into their plan since they came to herba buena yeah finally the plan has gone too far for them yeah they suddenly it's out of control right like of their control a little bit like they brought in a third

party and what did they expect i don't know she took over they didn't expect that she'd be so delusional to think she was actually a goddess and they they didn't expect that she'd be so delusional to think she was actually a goddess and they also didn't expect how much power the villagers would give this woman like they literally were like forget this high priest these high priests like this is our actual goddess like she's the one that deserves all the attention yeah like who are you now like this woman is in charge of us um exactly so the ritual orgies went on per usual but now magdalena was the one you know overseeing them so yikes remember she's the high priestess of blood so yikes okay okay god i see yeah yeah yeah yeah she began ordering everyone to involve

themselves in fetishism incest and bestiality um okay i even got to the point i'm sorry where she was uh she would encourage the sa of children okay wow bad bad bad bad which was already happening but now you know now it's just more ritualized now when the queen demands it the queen demands it yeah exactly and then she decided that was not far enough why not just like up it up the ante a little more she had got an urge for blood so she said to her followers that in accordance with aztec mythology blood was the only decent food for the gods oh you know and i want to be clear this is like them fucking around this is not me saying like this is the religious this is the actual practice of aztec is what they were telling clear, this is like them fucking around. This is not me saying like, this is the religious, this is the actual practice of Aztec and Inca.

This is what they were telling people for control. Yes, this is what they took advantage of and tried to make, exactly. So as part of the rituals, she got the villagers to cut themselves and then she would collect their blood in a chalice. And then she would mix the blood with drugs and would drink it. And she told everyone this is how she was immortal. She would drink their blood mixed with like, I don't know what drugs, but mixed with drugs. And that's how she was able to keep her immortality intact. One, that, number one, that would for sure convince me.

I'd be like, this person's literally drinking everyone's combined blood in a cup like out of a chalice if you're not a god like well we're gonna find out real soon when you die from the biohazard but a very good point like i i would i mean if someone said i'll prove it here like or this is what i do now i'd be like damn she must be a god or like even if she's not i'm scared of her like i if that's what she does questioning if that's what she does without even being asked like um i don't want to know what she's capable of yes and number three that sounds absolutely disgusting i'm sorry like i just i can't you drinking your blood orange over there i'm just your blood orange tea or whatever i'm just like i'm the high priestess of blood orange

but yeah exactly like i'll that's about the level that i could get to no further no further biohazard indeed um so whenever anyone questioned her practice like hey so like why are we doing this again uh she would either set them on fire or beat them or threaten to have them killed so why was anyone questioning it if someone's drinking blood i would be like first of all whatever you say goes now out of fear but also like i'd be like if it's my blood i'd be like can we can you remind me again why i have to do this i don't know she really she really wasn't getting sick from this no i don't think so i think i mean people do shit like this right like people are like self-proclaimed vampires and shit.

I guess. I think, I mean, I already wouldn't want to drink a different person's blood. Not even my own blood, let alone a different person's blood. But then on top of that, like you take a bunch of people's blood and mix it all together. Oh, I don't know. I don't think she's mixing it together. I think she's just like. Like doing shots of different people's blood.

I think it's like, oh, as part of this ritual, this one person cuts their arm. I collect it in a chalice, mix it with drugs and drink it. Do you know what I mean? It's still not good. It's disgusting. Trust me. Yeah. But I don't think it's like everybody has to like mix together their blood or anything.

That's what I thought was happening. Like we were like, it was like one big concoction. I am so grossed out right now. Whatever it is, it's so foul. But if you question it, like you were concoction i am so grossed out right now whatever it is it's so foul but if you question it like you were just set on fire oops so nice work essentially the hernandez brothers were being just like shoved out of the picture at this point like they just didn't matter if i brought someone in who was now drinking everybody's blood and they were like you can go now i'd be like i was looking for a way out anyway so actually we were already on the last train out of town um we're going to the next place the next

time we're not bringing an incan god with us we're gonna do it ourselves this got out of hand so magdalena was like fully in charge there is no doubt this operation had become like her cult basically uh and one doubt she one day she was confronted by two cult members who were essentially being treated as sex slaves who were tired and broken and were like we want out of here please like we're done we just want to leave we won't you know just let us leave well they didn't get to leave um oh they were lynched later that day. Their blood was used in that evening's ritual. And now Magdalena had just like a full free card to murder people who were like in opposition to her. Like, how dare you question me?

They were murdered and used for ritual. So, yeah, like people were not going to keep questioning her. Basically, it's only been six weeks by the way since she got there uh she's already sacrificed four people she would cut the person drink their blood then cut out their hearts and then stand over their bodies quote writhing in ecstasy oh wow she's taking it too far she has really let the power go to her head yes i mean this is the ultimate example of somebody letting the power go their head um so scene scene change

here all relevant but just like split screen this is what's happening somewhere else a young man 14 a boy 14 years old sebastian guerrero is out for a walk on a gorgeous May Day. Suddenly he hears some screaming in the distance. And he's like, what is that? So he sees flickering lights coming from the direction of the caves. So he goes to check it out. Y'all, if you're ever in this scenario, do not, please do not go check it out. I feel like nothing good can come of this yeah pretty uh hmm just i don't know what he's got to see but pretty naive for a darling bud of may

poor sweet buddy buddy of may he's like 14 so he goes to check it out he gets closer and closer he starts to smell incense and he enters one of the caves probably had no fucking clue what he was about to witness i mean this is the 60s again this is not like ancient times where these things happened or were like you know whatever i really can't whatever you're about to tell me is like insane i can already tell he sees inside this cavern a group of naked people having sex with one another having sex with another as a cup containing something of a deep red color is being passed around between everybody and whatever is inside the glass is staining everyone's skin as they like drink it and it's like spilling and then he sees what is dispensing this lovely beverage that they're all partaking in

and he sees on top of an altar a man being chopped with an axe i'm sorry i just like m's face i i oh my god it's just nervous laughter i mean this is horrible i i'm sweating so much so he sees this man being chopped with an axe. His blood was being poured into glasses and a woman was standing above him holding his heart in her hand. So this 14 year old boy is like, uh oh, this is not what I expected to see. Are you kidding? His like tolerance for any information ever again just went, uhoh like it went it plummeted his right like i can't imagine if you're like 14 you're in the 60s like out in a rural area you've never probably even owned a tv maybe you've seen like one episode of like what's one of the 60s shows

that's really like cliche and silly um the brady bunch or something and he's like this is my experience of the outside world and then he walks into a fucking cave it was a literal stephen king movie it was like the beginning of it and then it became the end of it he stepped it to just like wow oh my so he okay so just to clarify just to like force myself to hear this again so he ended up witnessing an orgy of people simultaneously having sex and drinking probably blood out of chalices while behind them was another person being chopped with an axe to death or was already dead being chopped away while someone held his heart yeah and the blood in the chalice was being poured from his body that they were axing and then passing around if that makes i was gonna say i was i i was like why are they

still chopping at him if he's his heart they're gathering more blood yeah yeah so they're just like refilling wow refilling the punch bowl wow yeah so fucked up fucking terrible so um he's like probably you know changed forever and i am i am too right like this is enough to traumatize me just fucking imagine what did he do i mean i honestly honestly i would have been frozen in fear i can't imagine being able to react i would have just frozen i'm glad you asked because he did exactly what we wouldn't do which is that so he ran away understandably um but like we're in the middle of nowhere this kid has just like kind of wandered off so he runs 15 miles to find the nearest person that's adrenaline that's gonna say that's when you know every time he starts to get tired, he reimagines it. Yeah. And it just fuels him all the way.

That kid will never wander away again. Like, just so. Yeah. So he runs fucking 15 miles to the nearest village or the nearest town called Villagran. And he runs to the desk of this police station he finds. And this poor kid is just like, I need to tell you what I just saw. He saw vampires, quote unquote, who are gluttonously drinking human blood and awfully terribly the officers start laughing because they're like okay kid and it's like

you don't even understand officers what the truly just went through like yeah and even as a as a 14 i'd be like you even i mean you just said it but as as a 14-year-old, I would be like, no, you don't fucking get it. Like, you piece of shit, you go look. But also, like, it's so telling of his, like, youth that I guess, I mean, he wasn't wrong by the definition, but for him to think they were, like, vampires. Yes, like, how else do you describe that, right? Like, I don't know what else to think of it, yeah. He had 15 miles to come up with the vocabulary and like vampires is what fits i guess so he one police officer named luis martinez finally is like okay i'll go back with you and we'll see what's going on they drive uh they decide to drive over to the cave and they were

never seen alive again oh i know it's terrible it's like the last thing you want is for this. Wait, Sebastian and the cop? Yeah. Oh, I know. It's awful. So Luis and Sebastian never returned, which obviously then the police are like, okay, wait. They went for this mission and they never came back. So they're like, we need to go to Yerba Buena and check out what the hell is going on.

So along with a contingent of the literal army the via grand police headed to find luis and sebastian and see what was going on they arrived at yerba buena and immediately discovered luis and sebastian's bodies near a farmhouse they didn't realize at the time that this farmhouse is where magdalena was living but it was outside of her home they flipped over the bodies to reveal that both of their hearts had been cut out oh no yeah so the hernandez brothers who are still there even though like they don't matter anymore to anybody they see that the feds have arrived is basically where i was going okay and they pull out their weapons and start shooting and so so the Yerba Buena villagers created a barricade in one of the caves.

Santos Hernandez, one of the brothers, was shot by police along with many other members of the cult during the shootout. Magdalena and Eleazar were both found and arrested in a farmhouse. Both were in possession of a lot of drugs, which in my mind is the least of anyone's worries. But that's part of the part of the scene um cayetano hernandez was also killed but by a fellow cult member named jesus rubio who apparently had been envious of the brother's powers and had been wanting to become a high priest himself for a long time but they never let him so he just was finally like this is my moment yeah he was like, shooting my shot. Wow, that's yikes.

We don't know much about his story, but apparently he just was like, me, I want to be part of the club. And they were like, no. And then finally he just got his revenge and killed one of them. He had his own agenda for sure. Yeah. So in the caves, police found six other people who had been used as sexual sacrifices, which is a phrase I never wanted to hear in my life and now forced all of you to hear. And I apologize. Oh, my God.

It's sick. It makes me want to do a sign of the cross. I'm not even like Catholic anymore, but just like hearing like the horrors of I don't know. Sometimes when I read these stories, I just I know. I don't know. I don't know. Magdalena was sentenced to 50 years for the murders of sebastian and luis although she had obviously only 50 more people right and she was like for sure like the the engine behind many other murders and she was like r wording like

children and shit you know what i mean like there was a lot more darkness but she got 50 years for the murders of sebastian and louise other villagers were called in to speak against her but all of them refused to say anything that could be used against their goddess like they were clearly fully brainwashed into this whole plan and because of this some of them even received 30 year sentences for being complicit in gang murder which i'm sort of like i think they are the victims here but it's always it's always such a touchy subject because it's like yeah it's hard you definitely were threatened into this but also you did do it but then you partook yeah it's like a very gray area i feel like um yeah exactly so if madalena was sentenced to 50 years her release date would have been like very recently like 2013 but i'm not sure if she ever got out there's like doesn't seem to be much info I feel

like it would be good tabloid press if she were to get out but right I haven't seen anything also she I mean who knows maybe she died in prison maybe she got more time or maybe she just got out with no fanfare which imagine that 50 years later getting out of prison and as being the high priestess and now you're like i also wonder what her what her place in prison was like if she genuinely thought she was a queen and she was wondering why nobody around her would bow down i wonder if she converted anybody to thinking she was a queen i wonder if that reality shattered or if she like continued it and i wonder if anyone who was threatened into the things that they did if there was ever any brain unbrainwashing where they were able to realize the gravity of like oh

shit yeah i imagine i imagine some people at least but i don't know so who knows i mean i'll keep an eye out maybe we'll find out what happened to her. But that is a story of the High Priestess of Blood of 1963. Not even that long ago. Thinking of, you know, Incan gods and sacrifices and all that. Wow. That's the story. Morning glory. I feel like that was your version of Madame Lallery.

Aha. Interesting. That was really dark yeah really dark similarly dark i mean i guess madam a lot of a lot of torture yeah torture just like having people under your thumb and doing whatever you want to them i mean that was like, that final scene of, like, in the cave, that feels like you just told me a scene from, like, a horror movie trying to be scary. Sounds like Da Vinci Code plus, I don't know. It's like Midsommar or some bullshit. Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes. It feels like the story can't be a real story like everything else like the i mean not again not trying to compare stories here um in terms of like trauma or anything but the stories usually tell of like

a home invasion or a kidnapping it's like those are like rooted in real fear but the one you that this one is like i would have never even thought that that could be a legitimate concern that's i know and and the crazy thing too is like if that little boy hadn't been able to get to the police first and say this is what i saw to all these officers and then get killed because if he'd gotten killed right away nothing would have happened nobody would have even probably realized like yeah unless you know his parents happened to find where he ended up or but but also like that's like what a brave little kid first of all to like go back with the cop to say this is what i saw yes are you kidding me like wow that's and just to end so tragically terrible yeah wow i really actually don't think I can process that. Yeah, it's a lot.

It gives me goose cam. I don't think I know how to fully wrap my head around that. Well, I think, I do think that is my version of a Madame Lowry story. It just so is like theatrically horrific. Theatrical, yes. It's just

so over the top. Yeah. Wow. Hmm. Now i really don't know how to end this anyway as usual uh here we are awkwardly backing out the door and saying hope you had fun yikes um is there i'm trying to think of a thing we can do oh what's i don't know what's the size of your baby this week what's the size of my baby um i'm desperate for like a like a way to like is it it could be the size of anything and i'd be happier than what i'm feeling right now okay let's go with cantaloupe or the volleyball from top gun or the poly pocket adventure playset although i guess when this comes out, it'll be the size of a Windows 95 box. You know, those boxes that the CD-ROM came in.

Yeah. Wow. I totally forgot about that. Or, let's see, Forrest Gump's box of chocolates. Do we actually know what the size of his box of chocolates was? No. I feel like they really did give like such a vague detail of like what if i mean okay wait you're gonna love the one after that

you'll know the size of this one week 34 is the eggo waffle box from stranger things oh i literally made that i know it's on here oh wait ah oh that that very quickly my my dopamine levels are like on a roller coaster flexing around here um apparently uh the box of chocolates is 17 inches long so that's so fun wow so something i literally made is on how cool is that i was waiting i was like i'm it's movie props i was like eventually something's gonna have to fit your eventually something well the guy who trained me and everything at iss he is the thing i give him claim to fame for is he was the one who made wilson on from castaway the volleyball it's his handprint and so that is cool so i before i always wanted to but i forgot but before i left

iss i wanted to get a volleyball and have him use his handprint and make me like a real a replica yeah dude how cool is that well it this week it's a volleyball from top gun i imagine it's the same size as the volleyball from castaway right like i can't probably it's still standard volleyball yeah wilson's many different size i don't know yeah well uh that's crazy that's a really cool claim to fame i have to say well please screenshot the stranger things ego box then i will because that's you know i mean it's literally the same size as every other ego box to be fair but like the fact that it says from stranger things yeah makes it feel like okay so the one that i made yeah you made which is cool because it was edited that means they made this app or they updated this app like after you made that box and they were like oh i know a cool prop it's that one i made that is a fun idea right yeah yeah they were like that's worth putting in

the list well when your baby is the size of a box of chocolates i hope that they're not at least like i hope they're not as pointy as that would be probably painful volleyball i feel like i can handle yeah um box of chocolates a little sharp but yeah anyway now that we've totally distracted from the high priestess of blood i really am trying to do like a like a shiny yarn dangling in front of myself like just to like wow that was just such an awful story anyway if you would like to um go buy our merch for 50 off uh and you're listening to this when it when this episode comes out uh look out for an announcement sometime this week and our merch site is atwwdmerch.com yes and uh go get all of your goodies we are cleaning house and making room for new stuff so uh enjoy that while you can and hey that's why we drink