And That's Why We Drink - E67 The UK Office Alien and Too Much Mutton

Episode Date: May 13, 2018

The UK Office Alien and Too Much Mutton

How you feeling? Um, I'm feeling a little under the weather. We had a really long weekend. A really long, wild weekend. We were in Nashville. We were, and we were there for only 72 hours and i feel like we did 100 hours worth of stuff and m's not even team wine and it's still i'm the one that came back like basically a fucking mess listen my tolerance is real good

i don't know okay here's the thing first of all we had a fucking blast oh it was so fun it was so much fun i did my first live show and i made it out alive i also did my first live show oh yeah christine did too yeah i was there and everyone was so nice and so supportive and laughed really hard even when i don't think i was funny i know so thank you so much there were some people who were laughing at parts that i i don't even remember i really did black out a few times. We went afterward. We looked at each other like, how did we do that? Did we do it yet? Is it over? Did it even begin? What happened? And so everyone was so nice. There were so many people who want to take pictures with us. People gave us presents. People had a signing, very weird things. We signed a onesie. We signed

wine glasses. Yeah. We signed a whole lot of stuff. What a time to be alive. And we made so many friends. Oh, we made so many friends. We had a meetup where we expected like maybe 10 people to show up and i think over 200 people came we did a dum-dum thing where we got there well first of all we got there early to our own party like big lamos and our moms weren't even there yet and then we stayed till fucking 4 15 in the morning so we literally we literally partied for nine hours, which is why this is the voice you hear coming out of my fucking face. Listen, I'm here drinking. I'm good to go. And it's Thursday, by the way.

And this was almost a week ago. My voice still hasn't recovered. We went to cook out with some new pals that we made. Shout out to basically there was literally over 100 people there. And by 2 in the morning, it had dwindled down to us and then four other people. I don't know when my mom left,

but suddenly she was gone. Oh, Renata came over to me and said, can you make sure Christine gets home alive? And I was like, I don't know about alive, but I'll get her home. So embarrassing. I'm too old for that. And so also Renata and linda met oh it was

magical everyone applauded it was great also someone had a t-shirt with renata and linda's names on on the shirt and she got our moms got a picture with that girl in the shirt back it said hashtag mom goals and the next time my mom took me aside and was like what is a mom goals and i was like all right and uh so anyway by two in the morning we were still apparently raging so shout out to it was ashley and hunter and darian and cecil and they were i was gonna say they were all a couple they were not they were not all they were we were all a couple together we were all we were we were three couples making six people yes and they ate hush puppies together well christine got fucking toasted well i don't and christine was like i need to eat food right now and so we walked over to cookout which by the way was something for me because i i haven't had cook essence college

although during the meetup someone someone's wife ran to cook out to get you a milkshake. That's true. I had posted a photo. Two different people got me milkshakes at the meetup and then they got taken away from me at the bar. Why? Because it's apparently a health code violation to bring food out. I loved the bar. It was great. But also I almost got the bartender fired. Uh, you almost got us kicked out, Christine. I thought I did get us kicked out. Here's the i did get us kicked out here's the thing i climbed behind the bar and i was like look at me go and i was like m take a photo and then i just remember this scary man yelling at our friend glenn who was the bartender and poor glenn was having a good time but was like so overwhelmed because there were so many of y'all

there and i kept apologizing and he's like stop apologizing and i was like did i get you fired like i went into this dramatic drunk girl oh no you you were what did I do don't tell me I don't want to know I'm really embarrassed it's let's just say like I tried telling you to calm the fuck down and you refused to and at one point I'm trying to have a conversation with you like to explain what's happening and you first of all we're not processing it and second of all dad i'm sorry you kept saying like i'm good i'm fine i'm fine and as you were saying i'm fine one of your eyes were closed the entire time that's what i do that's what i do and i'm not fully conscious i know everyone was asking me

like does she get this drunk during the show and i was like i've never seen christine this drunk in my entire life the next day i it's very rare and the thing was that we had our live show and I was so anxious that afterward we went back to the hotel to like nap and I was like I need room service so I ordered a fucking cosmopolitan but it was like for two people and I was like okay that's fine I'm sure it won't be that much they delivered like this giant glass of vodka and Em fell asleep. So I was just sitting there watching Bob's Burgers and drinking vodka. And then we had our meetup. And then I, well, no, no. So Christine is plunging Cosmos while I'm sleeping and I wake up to her drunk ass playing the song Good Morning Starshine.

And she's dancing around the bed to wake me up for our live, for our meetup. I had like one hair extension in and i was just and then i asked how long i'd been asleep and she was her exact sentence was look this is what happens when you go to bed and leave me alone to drink all of the wine yeah i mean what did you expect i made my mom walk over to our hotel room and bring me a bottle of wine while you were sleeping yeah i'm a real psychopath anyway so anyway and then we also made we did the exact opposite of what someone with a true crime podcast should do no they're gonna be so ashamed of us we had so don't tell eva she's gonna darian and cecil peaced out and then it was just us with ashley

and hunter and they drove us home and we met them that night they were like do you want to get in our car and we'll take you do you want to get in our car? And we were like, yes. Do you want to take a lift or do you want us to just drive you back to the hotel? And we were like, we'll get in your car. Let's go in their car. And then, of course, as we got in their car, it was like the foggiest night on earth. And they got lost.

And they were like, I don't really know where we are. And I was like. We took a wrong turn off the highway. I was like, we're going to get fucking murdered. And Em and I were not discreet. We just kept talking loudly like. They're going to kill us how we die they're gonna kill us this is what our podcast is about we're gonna die now and they were like okay we're literally trying to get to the hotel yes and they thankfully they were not murderers they got us to the hotel i'm sorry in advance dad my dad is really dying right now oh my mom's pissed i'm getting texts right now

from my mother being like what the fuck is wrong with you linda had a great time so i don't know oh yeah linda had a great time linda and renata were oh my mom was walking around with the fake geo for a while and she's like everyone in the hotel she just kept hearing it's geo it's geo from like different parts of town she was just like i didn't know what to do i just kept walking and looked down and kept walking because people kept chatting it was very weird this was the first time we ever felt relatively famous because people just jump out in the middle of the hotel and be like i love you we made so many friends it was very weird and we saw we met wine and crime for the first time we met wine and crime and i got to fly home with one third of wine and crime yes amanda sat on a plane right next to me for two hours on the way to denver and we

had quite a powwow we really actually got to learn a lot about each other we talked about very personal things god they're such gems I learned that Amanda is not entirely the same person on the show as she is in real life what does that mean no like it like I like getting to know like her like when she's not on oh god I got it but I liked it it's I mean she's still the same person right she's still funny they're so funny and they were deer and dolls to crime con and now i'm buying a deer and doll from the website that got them their deer and dolls also um this isn't funny but it's important and like we'll never have this experience again while we were there who shows up at our booth to talk to us but the youngest victim of irons ev's face. She was the 13 year old.

I forgot about this. She showed up and told us the entire story. Well, she showed up before we even knew who she was. Yeah, she just announced it herself. She goes, oh, yeah. She's like, wow, this is such a cool idea. Like your podcast and stuff. We were talking to her.

And all of a sudden she goes, yeah. She said a couple of times like, yeah, we caught Golden State Killer last week. And I was like, I don't know how to ask. Like, what do you mean we caught him? Yeah, because we're also at a convention filled with like cops and so i thought maybe she was on the case investigator so i think at one point you said like oh how are you involved in the case and she was like fuck yeah i was like oh i'm number or number 10 i think i'm number 10 and i was like number 10 oh my god and she was like yeah i was 13 at the time and then she told her

entire story and she actually she seemed fine, explaining it and talking about it. I mean, she even said, like, I mean, she said it in her own words. Like, I'm so lucky how well-adjusted I am because I was so young and I was able to process it differently from people who are older. Or, like, in relationships. And they couldn't be with their husbands anymore. Yeah. And she's like, it never affected my sex life. It never affected what I consider to be my virginity.

Like, it just like the way she talks about it so openly. And she was with her husband. She's like, I'm so like happy. And this has changed the lives of me and so many other people that were affected. And then she talks about how when she was attacked, she'd already heard about the attacks. And so she knew what was going on. And she knew who he was. But at the time, he hadn't killed anyone yet.

And she's like, it probably would have been completely different if I knew that he would go on to murder people. Right. And so it's just fascinating to hear her take on it. Yeah. And she said that one of the big things that saved her is because she was a teenager and in that kind of like fuck you world mentality because she had the invincible. She felt invincible. And so she stood up to him was yelling back at him about it yeah yeah she one of the things that she had read in clippings at up until then was that he

like fed off of fear yeah and so she a 13 year old who feels invincible that nothing can possibly happen to her as it's literally happening to her yeah she was like fuck you i don't care and apparently it made him leave sooner it's just so incredible because a lot of people ask, I mean, a lot of people, as in like my parents or whoever, are like, why do you talk about this horrible stuff? And it's like so incredible to see somebody like that who's been through the worst of the worst and then can like come to something like CrimeCon

and be like, this is amazing that you're talking about it. And that like, this is so freeing for people who've gone through it. And it was just such a powerful thing to hear somebody say, I want to listen to you guys talk about the man who fucking raped me and put me through hell it's just crazy it's crazy at least get the story out it's a really wonderful moment also i just wanted to say i know this is a really long intro but i feel like since this was our first live show you guys kind of want to hear about it so that's why i'm letting it go a little longer than normal and if you don't then then eva cut that out um but i did also want to say

i like wrote notes because there was so much and i did a dumb thing what i looked down at your paper and saw what your thing is that's fine i know you're freaked out i'm freaking i know you're freaked out i knew it okay well i'm not done talking about this yet okay go on this is why it was folded up a very specific way it's all bold on the top why you bold it it's also an eight point font okay here's the thing i got contacts i can see it now i did want to talk about how we barely got any sleep but we also had so much fun and then um something you didn't get to experience because you were you had already come home because christine took a flight before us and then alexander and i took our own flight home together so as you guys would

remember if you're at the live show allison and her sister were staying at christine's house while we were all gone in nashville and i thought as you know because i told you in advance i was like i'll see you at the house but i'm gonna go like right stay at allison's tonight like because i haven't seen her all weekend and this is just like a funny little stupid story that happened but I want you to be involved I'm so excited so Zandy and I got home at like 1 a.m or midnight or something like that and got to your house and I had to get my car keys from your house because my car was parked in your parking lot or in your driveway in my large your mansion's parking lot and so I went in to get the keys and then i saw that the air mattress that allison had been sleeping on was still up and someone was sleeping in it no and so i was like oh i'm gonna

i didn't know allison was still sleeping here i'm just gonna like get in bed and snuggle her you big dope and so thank god at the very last fucking second alexander put a flashlight on and i saw who's in the bed and it was allison's sister and you're like hovering over her I literally like was like one knee already on the mattress about to like spoon the shit out of Allison's older sister and this was the second time I've ever met her and I would have literally been pulling her into me and then like I love you you know that she probably would have punched your face oh yeah it would have been I would have never been able to live it down oh but then I turned around and Allison was sleeping on the fucking couch. And I was like,

I thought your sister was gone. Like I, anyway, I just wanted that to Jesus. No one else got to know about that story. So, Oh, except now everyone knows.

Except now everyone knows. Okay. So that being said, wait, I have things to say. Oh, Christina's things to say. Sorry.

You know, I always do. Okay. But who's going to say it? Otherwise we have a birthday live show coming up. And m's not gonna talk about it i am excuse me what was the next thing on my list what oh i thought you were gonna say that being said you were gonna start your story now no but you can go ahead go oh i thought you meant you were gonna like start your story that i already saw no okay what i was gonna say sorry we have a birthday live show yes

yes june 3rd in irvine california bring us presents because it'll make me feel better Okay, what I was going to say, sorry. Go ahead. Birthday live show. Yes. Yes. June 3rd in Irvine, California. Bring us presents because it'll make me feel better about being on stage. I mean, if you wanted to, you don't have to. Oh my God, Em. But just do it. We're going to go be in Irvine. Eva, are you going to be there?

Yay. Eva's coming. Eva's going to be there. We're so excited. And Fake Gio will probably be there. Yeah, Fake Gio will be there. In his matted glory. He's very matted after CrimeCon. we'll get him a little a little salon time uh we're gonna be in irvine june 3rd it's a huge performance for us it's our biggest performance yet it's a big venue we're trying to

sell as many tickets as possible and we just really want you guys to be there and it's going to be our birthday weekend it's m's birthday that day and mine's the next night or the next day so we want you guys to come so please do if you get the chance or if you're anywhere near irvine please come also i just want to add real quick we're doing uh something a fun thing with nothing rhymes with murder speaking of golden state killer they're doing a really awesome raffle with a bunch of true crime podcasts that supports and the backlog to work on getting rape kits processed and so they're doing this huge raffle with a bunch of other podcasts. And we've donated two $25 gift cards to our shop as part of the raffle.

So if you guys go check out Nothing Rhymes With Murder, they're doing a really awesome raffle and it supports a really awesome cause and we're really proud to be a part of it. And also Zach Baggins unblocked me on Twitter. No way! That means he's heard about us. that's the scary part of that thing i don't know if it was like that he unblocked me before because i don't think i ever checked because i remember when he blocked me and this was like four years ago and i never checked again and then like yesterday i went and looked and it was like i could see his

account again oh no i like to believe that it's all of y'all who have been tweeting at him oh my god but in my mind now that people keep tweeting at him he's gonna re-block me because he's like what the fuck i don't want to be a part of this it's like oh so you got enough notoriety that you could continually batter me after i've blocked you yeah yeah so i don't know what the deal is but i just want to say if you guys did this thank you is that why you drink this week yeah i drink this week because it today is mother's day today's not mother oh when this comes out oh shit stop don't remind my mom about that so happy mother's day to linda and renata uh i currently drink because today in advance i got my mom an edible arrangement and had it

mailed to the house and then i just checked my email only like 20 minutes ago and saw the bill and apparently because there's like a surcharge since it's mother's day my 45 dollar edible arrangement cost me 93 dollars oh so happy mother's day mom love you mean it there better be chocolate on that thing i hope you eat all of it is it the spongebob one they sell a spongebob one no it's a i got her a dozen chocolate covered strawberries and but linda's gonna love and a four pack of chocolate covered oreos dude she's gonna love that she better fucking love it also i drink because linda invited me to her wedding you guys oh yeah so there's gonna be a lot of weird pictures from that wedding too linda was like

what are you doing june 30th And I was like, it's happening. It's happening. Two opportunities to see us in nice attire, but also looking like fucking rocks. Hashtag black tux. Anyway, that's why I drink. Okay, I'm good. I'm good. Let's talk.

Okay, so Christine, you've already seen what it's about. I'm so excited! Okay. I only did it because Christine never shuts the fuck about. I'm so excited! I only did it because Christine never shuts the fuck up. I'm so excited! Why did you put it on bold on the top of the paper? What did you expect? I put a title for every single one.

Well, it took until episode 67 for me to figure that out. Do you want to announce it? Do you want to do a special announcement? Dun-dun. Dun-dun. Dun-dun. Dun-dun. Dun-d Dun dun. Dun dun. Dun dun.

Mothman! Mothman prophecies! Do you like my song? Yes. That was a no and yes put together. Eva didn't like it either. It's fine. Okay.

So here we go. This is Mothman. I'm so excited. I'm sorry. I'm so excited. Also, wow. The people who are into Mothman are really This is Mothman. I'm sorry. I'm so excited. Also, wow. The people who are into Mothman are really fucking into Mothman. It was so hard to get this down to an amount of notes that I usually read.

I cannot even imagine. I, it was, I mean, when I started, I do everything on Microsoft Word because I'm fucking eight. But all of my. So do I. Oh, okay. High five. I don't know if there's like a new age way that people take notes. I'm fucking 80.

Cause I know it on Microsoft word. This started as like a 23 page. Oh, I believe document of notes and I had dwindle it down to a page and a half. So I'm sure I'm missing something. So don't be mad. Don't get mad at us because Eva doesn't want to have to read that email. He doesn't want to awkwardly not send it to us,

but know that it was sent. Yes. So I'm just gonna, I just kind of didn't know how to organize this so we're just gonna go with how it happened let's go okay bullet one apparently the most important mothman has been haunted haunted oh my god what a twist now that is called a double entendre um so mothman has been hunted in the show destination america oh i love that show okay that was apparently the most important thing i had to say in this whole thing also the largest so i'm talking about the area first sure so this is in point place west virginia which point pleasant point pleasant yeah what did i say point place

fuck me i love that though point place point place point pleasant west virginia and the largest number of sightings have happened in an area called the tnt area which is professionally known as west virginia ordinance works but uh the area was actually made up of several hundred acres of woods and concrete domes where high explosives used to be made and stored in world war ii ew so that's just a giant forest ammunition type with a whole bunch of like concrete domes covered in older ammunition very scary i mean exactly where someone like mothman would be i mean classic mothman okay so now we're in 1966 okay my throat is in 1801 okay okay and it's three years until gap the gap is founded okay got it so in 1966 on november 12th there were five men who were in a cemetery preparing

a grave for burial so i'm assuming they're like grave diggers. No, they're preparing it for burial. Grave preparers. They're not. Oh, wait, what did you say? Grave preparers. No, what did you say before that? Grave diggers. Oh, that is correct. I thought you meant grave robbers.

Nope. And I'm like. They can't rob a grave that is empty. I was like, Em, that doesn't make sense. Jesus Christ. Okay, so. Sorry, grave diggers. Yes, correct.

Correct. Correct. So they saw something lifting off from the nearby trees. It was a brown winged creature, which was not a bird and definitely humanoid. It glided over their heads and sounded like a woman screaming. Oh, my. Three days later. So that was its own event.

The end. The end of part one. And intermission. So three days later, Roger and Linda Scarberry were driving in a car with their friends Steve and Mary through the area around midnight. They saw something on the side of the road. on the side of the road and when they pulled over to see what it was it was two large glowing red eyes on something that looked like a human that was about seven or eight feet tall with wings folded against its back jesus the creature spread its wings and pursued them down highway 62 to the point pleasant city limits and it was flying at like a hundred miles an hour it was

keeping up with their car trying to get out as fast as possible. Because imagine seeing something that's like an eight foot human with bat like wings and laser red eyes just like take off. That decides to follow you. At over 100 miles an hour. No, thank you. So they apparently beat it out or it flew away or something like that. But they didn't see it anymore. So they pulled over, discussed what they saw and decided it was just a really big bird like we're just

they were like okay i want to sleep tonight let's just say it was a bird a coping mechanism if i ever heard that's denial denial denial yeah yeah so to prove it was nothing this is where you say oh no oh no they drove back towards the tnt area psychos and true to form mothman was waiting for them beside route 62 oh good they turned on the headlights because it was standing in the middle of the fucking road like blocking them from continually driving they turned the headlights on and it lifted vertically in the air without moving its wings like just literally just shot straight up no thank you and then disappeared that same night at 10 30 a guy named newell partridge who lived 90 miles north of point pleasant he was watching tv

and the screen went dark all by itself oh my there was a weird pattern that came on the screen and then he heard a loud sound outside that raised in pitch higher and higher and higher and higher until all of a sudden it just stopped so it was just just went to like radio silence his dog bandit began to howl out on the front porch and so he went out to see what was going on he turned on a flashlight in that direction and saw a human with wings and two red eyes staring at him oh the dog who was a hunting dog chased it and newell partridge the guy went back into the house for his gun but he was so scared of what he saw that he stayed inside the house and just slept with his gun next to him oh man the next morning he woke up and couldn't find his dog anywhere no bandit two days later he read in the newspaper that there were sightings of a giant humanoid owl with red wink with red eyes and

brown wings that was seen around point pleasant in one of the statements which happened to be a statement from the Scarberries and their friends in the car. Linda Scarberry. Linda Scarberry. Classic Linda. Classic. One statement that they had in the newspaper was that as they entered the city limits, they saw the body of a large dog lying on

the side of the road. And a few minutes later when they went back to go see the... Right, to return to him. To return to the mothman like idiots the dog was no longer there so either he limped off or got eaten or something no so a press conference was held because so many people saw this thing in one night there was at least four people that saw it that night that's crazy that it was literally had and from so many different areas like this guy was 90 minutes away from them so it was definitely able to fly that far and be seen.

And it wasn't like he was on Snapchat and so on was like, yeah, me too. It was like, right. I mean, people were virally. I mean, Snapchat was super popular in 66. So you're right. So I'm very wrong. Okay. So a press conference was held and local press began printing the story.

And so many people started coming forward with previous sightings. And the headline, for the first time that Mothman was ever noticed in a newspaper, was, Couple sees man-sized bird... creature... something.

What? Ew! What the fuck? That's the title of a headline? It's estimated that in the first year, over 100 sightings were reported. Although there are some unidentifiable reports, but it also includes UFO sightings that happened to be very active and heavy during that time. So Mothman could be an alien.

The coloration that has been described is that he's either black, gray brown although it's usually darker shades and he's often reported to be about seven to eight feet tall with a wingspan of 10 to 15 feet plus the ability to fly over 100 miles per hour sometimes he is described as not having a head and the two huge red eyes that everyone sees are set in the chest of the body instead anyone who gets a close look at the Mothman seems to suffer from extreme fear and psychological distress. I fucking say. Well, yes. People say that a sense of pure evil

overcomes them when they look into his eyes and he can fold his leathery wings and walk with a weird shuffle that many witnesses compare to a penguin. Oh! Dread and penguins and leathery wings when he flies he unfolds his wings and shoots straight up with great speed without actually flapping his wings at all god damn it just levitates at 100 miles an hour so there's a guy named john keel who became one of the major

reporters of the mothman case hell yeah john, John Keel. And from November 1966 to December 1967, he met at least 100 witnesses that all reported their stories. And he compiled evidence from Mothman sightings to UFO reports to anything that happened before the creature was seen the first time to an influx in all the UFO sightings that happened that year to basic problems throughout the town like televisions and phones not working lights being seen from the skies like flashing lights in the skies and cars stalling on route 62 for no reason at all so he put all that

together he also apparently came across some potential poltergeist situations in the area because there were a lot of houses that year that for some reason locked doors would open and close by themselves there were strange bumps that were heard inside and outside of homes and a woman's scream oh god from people's yards from the yards uh one family that he talked to saw a funny red light in the sky that moved and hovered above the tnt plant where the Mothman supposedly lives. Great. They went outside for a closer look and suddenly they heard something moving by their car.

And then a quote says, it seemed like it had been lying down. It rose up from the ground and it was bigger than a man with terrible red glowing eyes. The family locked everyone inside the house while the creature shuffled onto the porch and peered into the windows while screaming the sounds of a woman and then vanished they said that they heard his wings flapping although they didn't see them flap so you just you could hear flapping it wasn't happening he wasn't actually what the hell that's one of the

people that he talked to. There was another reporter. This is... Hang on. I have an itch. Okay. I actually was itching the same spot. Oh, yeah? Yeah.

That's fun. Oh, we're twins. So, let's talk about the men in black. Can we? Because this is the best part. Okay. Let me refill my glass. This is the best fucking creepiest part.

Oh, so you know about this? I listened to the Astonishing Legends series on this. It is bonkers fucking creepiest part oh so you know about this i listened to the astonishing legends uh series on this it is how am i doing so far real good and also i just don't even i have a really bad memory so this is all very exciting anyway well this is me trying to get through this as efficiently as possible it's good it's good so besides john keel uh there's another reporter named mary hire and she was working late in her office um and a man walked into the door this is also in point pleasant okay and she was collecting a lot of ufo sightings a lot of ufo reports a lot of mothman reports just everything anyway a man comes into her office at the end of a day. And Mary reported that he was very short, had strange eyes, thick glasses, long black hair that was squarely cut like a bowl haircut.

That's not good. And he spoke in a low voice asking for directions to Welsh West Virginia. Do not let him inside. He had some sort of speech impediment, apparently. Okay. And he terrified her. Apparently, just his presence alone made her feel like she was going to die. Oh, my God.

Her quote is, he kept getting closer and closer to me, and his funny eyes were staring at me almost hypnotically. She got the manager to come over and talk to him and at that point the little man because he's super short the little man picked up a pen from her desk then he looked at it in amazement as if he had never seen a pen before stop it he grabbed it laughed out loud and then ran out of the building i'm literally freaking out right now i don't like this at all he ran out of of the building. Just scurried off with the pen. Did he take the pen? Yeah.

Oh my God, what a psycho. I like how that's the part that makes me a psycho. But do you think? It's like that shitty office mate you have that just takes all your pens and laughs loudly as he does it. But do you think, here's my theory. He and his little alien people or whatever watched a TV show. Yeah.

And they were like, what is that thing? And then when he was in our office he's like oh my god it's that thing we laughed about yeah yeah i found the thing i'm gonna go show everyone we were watching the uk version of the office and we had this thing and i was like what is that and they were like we don't know and then i was in this lady's office and i saw one and i just like couldn't help myself i had to show my friend i feel like that's what happened okay good i'm glad that's so the uk office alien yeah i think that's probably what it is i don't even write that down i don't think there's any other explanation no of course not he's british and an alien yeah yeah should we email them yeah okay

him i don't know who yeah we'll let michael scott know okay good so wrong yep sure whatever his name is scott mcfrone no wrong one oh my god Who's the other one? He looks like Scott McFarlane. Who's the UK office guy? His name starts with a D. No, G. No, it doesn't. Gerald J-J-J. That's wrong. Ricky Gervais.

Gervais. Ricky Gervais. Okay. Remember when I said Scott McFarlane was the UK office? Yeah, and then you told me I was wrong. Eva, don't let anyone hear that. It's really embarrassing. Anyone from England, we're sorry.

It's too late. You can let them hear it, but know that. It's really embarrassing. Anyone from England, we're sorry. It's too late. You can let them hear it, but know that I was talking about. Anyway, the alien that was pretending he was a human who started on the UK office, the title of this new episode, apparently, he laughed loudly and ran out of the building with pen in hand. What a jerk. Weeks later, Mary was crossing the street and saw the same man on the street when he nightmare when he realized she recognized him he quickly turned around and ran back to the

corner of the street where a black car suddenly came around the corner and let him in he dove and it drove off. What the fuck? A week later, in December 1967, the bridge linking Point Pleasant to Ohio suddenly collapsed while filled with rush hour traffic, and 46 people died. And two of the bodies were never found. Really sad. That same night of the bridge collision, or collapse, the bridge collapse

um the lily family saw 12 eerie lights flashing above their home and traveling between the house and the tnt area like floating back and forth at the same time that this crash happened shit they moved they were like i don't fucking care. I've heard enough. I'm out. Which is exactly what you and I are going to do the second there's trouble. A plus. So we are the Lilly family. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. So a week later, during Christmas week.

Oh, I'm sorry. That was actually the. OK. I fucked up. The bridge collision happened the same day that she saw the guy. Saw him dive into the car and drive away. And then that night. That night was the bridge. Yeah. into the car and drive away and then that night that night was

the bridge yeah and the lily family saw lights and moved because it was the day that a lot of people were doing like christmas shopping right yeah it was around christmas it was december 15th it was right before christmas and it was like rush hour yeah oh god so then during christmas week after all this has happened right mary h is like, well, that was fucking weird. How many people died? 46. Jesus, that's a lot. And also, like, without, like, there wasn't even preparation.

Like, the bridge just fell. And the bridge only fell because one single link wasn't screwed in right or something like that. So because of one thing, it just snapped and everyone just fell in. Okay, this is literally nightmarish. Yeah, just being on a bridge and just falling. That's nightmare. So if you're currently listening to this and you're on a bridge, I'm sorry. And hold your breath and cross your fingers and pray.

You'll be fine. Stop it. Don't let him stress you out. So the next week during Christmas week, Mary Hire is trying to forget this fucking ugly past of a week. i don't blame her then a short dark-skinned man enters the office that she is sitting in okay he is dressed in a black suit with a black tie he has high cheekbones narrow eyes an unidentifiable accent and very long fingers okay i don't actually really enjoy that at all i actually really anti-enjoy that he wanted

to know about local ufo sightings jesus and mary was working and too busy to talk so she handed him a file of related ufo clippings that have happened in the last week she did that she wasn't like please leave my office like here just take this i gotta i'm busy i'm sorry oh he said that was not good enough and insisted on speaking with her and demanded that she leave her work and take him to the site locations i'm just picturing his long fingers what a creepo that's what your work the whole time i'd be like do you not know how work works like i can't leave well also that but i'm picturing him being like yeah yeah take me the place. She literally just said, I'm busy. I can't. Sorry.

Good for you, Mary. And then left. And that same night, or had him leave the building. Yeah. The same night, an identically described man visited the homes of several witnesses in town who had reported seeing lights in the sky that year. No. He made every single one of them feel uneasy and uncomfortable,

and they called the police. And he claimed to be a reporter from Cambridge, Ohio. But then when someone brought up Columbus, Ohio, which was right down the road, he admitted he did not know where that was. Columbus, the capital of the state. Yes. Sure.

Okay. Listen, that is terrifying. Don't open your door. If someone rings your doorbell, don't answer it. Well, a bunch of of people tried calling the cops and the cops were on like a wild manhunt looking for this guy and no one could find him don't answer the door nothing good happens so anyway no one knows if he's related or not but at the same time like people kept seeing this guy that's during the year that all these weird sightings were happening and they don't know if like he's because there's a big theory that the mothman is a shapeshifter so they think that this guy might have been mothman stop it

yeah and sometimes he's just like i want to put eyeballs on my body yeah and long fingers on my hands and wear big wings so post 1967 there are still reports of mothman seen around the world but far less like the most concentrated time was between november 66 and december 67 but a lot of people have tried to make guesses of what mothman actually is like if you're going by logic standards sure a lot of people have said it is either a heron heron heron a heron heron like the bird yeah yeah it's either a heron a pelican a pterodactyl which based on logic i think is still not fucking accurate if pelican a pterodactyl which based on logic i think is still not fucking accurate if it were a pterodactyl that'd be its own fucking amazing story it'd be jurassic park in real life i think that'd be even wackier than a fucking mothman it would be oh and

also logic says it's probably a winged human which it's fucking not logically sure a sandhill crane that migrated south from canada on its own red eyeballs that could also talk and eat dogs a shape-shifting owl sorry this sounds like an episode of so weird from disney literally what is happening the area lies outside the snowy owl's usual range so they decided that it's not an owl although an owl makes the most sense when you think about eye shine, because people say that with the headlights and the flashlight, the reflection of the eyes only made sense with a barred owl because different owls have different levels of reflection in their eyes. And a barred owl has the one that looks like laser glowing red eyes. So they're like, OK, maybe it's a barred owl because those are also pretty big. Right.

But they don't actually fly in that area okay so they said that it might based on the eye shine it's that owl but based on the area it's not that owl but then based on the area it could be a million other things but nothing has that reflective of an eye shine okay so they don't know what it is a popular theory is that mothman is actually just a local man dressed in a halloween costume that jumps out of people's cars. Well, that's fun. That's the conservative opinion. He can also fly 100 miles per hour straight into the air.

Yeah, he also has laser eyes in his shoulders. Yes, he also collapses bridges for fun. Yes. Good. He also is a little man with long fingers that knocks on your door. Jesus. So there's also, in Point Pleasant, there is an annual Mothman Festival.

Yep. And it is a weekend long event held on the third weekend of every September. So we should go this year. Obviously. And they have guest speakers, vendor exhibits, hayride tours focusing on notable site areas, a museum that is always there, but you can also go at the time. And my favorite part, a Mothman pancake eating contest. Hold on. Sign me me up let's go so here's some other stuff about the mothman that it's either i don't know if it's important but i decided it is the mothman um because people were like for forever

have been trying to figure out what it could possibly be and the mothman has been associated with thunderbirds which are gray have gray bodies and redheads and were sighted in the same area at the same time and apparently are important to like the native tribes that used to live there oh interesting um it looks like a totem pole yeah i know exactly the bird yeah and it's also associated with the owl man not just the mothman because by the way every i was like why the fuck is that called a moth man apparently it's just because it's kind of brown and no one's ever seen it but i feel like it's because the eyes are on the body that makes sense too like

for predators they have that that's true i don't know that makes most but every single thing was like it's basically looks most like a human-sized owl i mean like it's fine that i'm smarter than most people but that's great it's okay you can just take it I mean, like, it's fine that I'm smarter than most people, but that's great. It's okay. You can just take it for what it is. Well, it's also not just associated with Thunderbirds. It's also associated with the Owlman, which is an identical creature that was cited in Cornwall, England in 1976. So like exactly 10 years later, this thing was being seen in Cornwall, England and was called the Owlman. Well, I feel bad for the Owlman, which is more accurate. Who's getting less attention.

Yeah, that's for sure. He's like, God, I came too late on the scene. The Mothman could also be dated all the way back to the Shawnee tribe. Oh, that's Ohio. Yes. I lived on Shawnee Road. Oh. Shawnee Run.

Well, now everyone knows where you live. I lied. I lived off of Shawnee Road. Cherokee Run. Got it.awnee run so it could be dated all the way back to the shawnee tribe because folklore um has a character named missignua which is a spirit that protects animals from hunters so they think that it could be um like a newfound reincarnation of the missignua or because it is big enough that it resembles its size, but actually has the description of Bigfoot.

So they don't know if Bigfoot is Massignois or the Mothman is, but one of them supposedly has something to do with the Shawnee folklore. Wow, that's interesting. It could also be Wowpee, which is another story from the shawnee tribe where a guy named wowpee wanted to be with his family but the only way to be with his family is they had to turn into white hawks and so they turned into white hawks and continued their life in the forest so it could be either of those based on shawnee folklore interesting because

that's the same area yeah and some believe that the mothman might actually be an angel a demon or a product of a blood curse placed on the town okay because in the 1770s the shawnee tribe which was the most powerful tribe at the time in the area were led by a chief named cornstalk he was actually named something else but the english translation is cornstalk sure he didn't like just choose that they were like that's what we think you're called yes cornstalk sure so cornstalk opposed war and he told the colonists that were coming in that he didn't want to fight anyone and if there was a war he wanted to not be a part of it. He said he didn't want anything to do with war. Yeah. So the Indians attacked. Oh, OK.

So as soon as they found out that he wasn't a threat, but they might be able to use him, the colonists decided that they were going to kidnap Cornstalk. I fucking. Because white people are horrible. I hate. White people are fucking horrible. That. I fucking hate that.

So they used him, took him in as a hostage sure they did to piss off the indians that the indians would have to fight what is okay i know just keep going i hate us too it's not my not my i hate that i'm kind of related to these people not my place i'm 100% and it makes me want to die okay go on let me pour some wine please thank you i'm almost done i'll take your time so the indians attacked to rescue corn stalk as prepared and as expected and so the colonists as punishment for the indians attacking them so they set them up to attack him do this and now we're gonna and now we're gonna punish you for exactly what we expect you to do so the colonists decided to execute him his friend and his son as revenge as revenge for them attacking him so they like basically baited them into it they baited them into killing themselves

and then punished yeah they're like well not our fault yep our guilt is alleviated so they chopped his son's head off in front of him and then shot him eight times until he fell to the floor. I don't like that. As he was dying, Cornstalk's last words were, I came to the fort as your friend and you murdered me. You have murdered by my side my young son. For this, may the curse of the Great Spirit rest upon this land. May it be blighted by nature

may it be blighted in its hopes may the strength of its peoples be paralyzed by the stain of our blood so wow they think that there is a curse on the land that is now point pleasant and it was actually point pleasant then too if anything like that i mean that's it makes the most sense you put a fucking curse after you murder your son well so they think that the curse is actually pretty legitimate because not only was like that bridge, like the only disaster that happened in the area. These are some of the other things that have happened nearby in West Virginia since that curse. This is just since 1907 too.

There's other things before this. I'm just going to go through the 1900s. Okay. In 1907, the worst coal mine disaster in American history. Oh my God. Happened in Monongah. okay in 1907 the worst coal mine disaster in american history oh my god happened in monon monongah i'm gonna fuck up near point pleasant west virginia point place in 1907 the worst coal mine disaster happened in american history and it was near point pleasant west virginia and 360 miners were killed killed. Oh, my God.

In 1930, there was a fire in the Ohio State Penitentiary that was less than 80 miles away from where Cornstalk was killed. And prisoners burned to death in their cells because the guards could not get them out. Fuck. So 320 inmates died in the cells. The whole thing was just on fire and they couldn't do anything. They were just locked in there in 1944 150 people were killed when a tornado came through the area in 1967 was the silver bridge disaster where 46 people died on the bridge um and a year later in 1968 there was a piedmont airlines plane that crashed in the area, killing 35 people on board.

In 1970, there was a Southern Airways plane that crashed into a mountain nearby that killed 75 on board. In 1976, there was an explosion at the Mason County Jail because a woman killed her baby. And so she was in jail for murder and then her husband snuck into the jail with a suitcase full of explosives and killed both of them including officers that were in the jail with them holy shit in 1978 two years later a freight train derailed at point pleasant and dumped thousands of gallons of toxic chemicals into the pond and contaminated all of their water supply and all the wells to this day are still abandoned because of that. Oh, my God.

Also in 1978, the town of St. Mary's, which was, I don't know, I think it wasn't too far away. 51 men who were working on a power plant were killed when the construction scaffolding collapsed. 51 men? Yeah. Jesus. So all that happened in just the 1900s in point pleasant west virginia small town in west virginia it's not like in new york city a lot of people exactly so and there have also been many other strange occurrences including fires and floods

and they say that the mothman whether or whether or not we've noticed has actually shown up at each of these but the thought is that it might actually be an angel not a demon because he actually shows up beforehand to warn you to like get the fuck out so if the the other thought is if the disaster is important enough and it's away from point pleasant he'll still show up to warn you so one example is he apparently showed up in Chernobyl a couple days before Chernobyl. So residents of a town nearby swear that they and several of them swear that they saw a bird like man with glowing red eyes several days prior to the explosion and also flying over not just the town, but the plant itself. As if like trying to summon people away from it like chasing them to scare them away from the town so like it's like it's scary that he's chasing you but he's trying to

save you that's my favorite theory um also 9-11 apparently five days before the towers got hit several witnesses report seeing a large crane-like figure near the towers and flying over people. What the fuck? Also, apparently, in a lot of the pictures and the smoke and debris, you can see an image of Mothman. Like something just kind of... I don't know if that's a Photoshop thing and I don't want to like... I don't know. I feel like a lot of people would be like, that's Photoshop, but whatever.

That's just a theory. I-35 West Bridge Collapse in 2007. I don't know. I feel like a lot of people will be like, that's Photoshop, but whatever. That's just a theory. I-35 West Bridge Collapse in 2007. Apparently, the bridge in Minneapolis gave way at its center and 13 people died and nearly 145 were injured. Holy shit. And a Mothman-like figure started appearing near the bridge a month prior. What the fuck? So many people noticed it.

There's reports of like this thing that looks like mothman floating around this bridge for a whole month especially in more modern day people are like tweeting about that yeah 2007 yeah so also in 2009 in mexico residents of the town chihuahua people began noticing a strange mothman like creature floating around them and he was very tall hairy two expansive wings and wide red eyes that glowed at you and you could feel evil if you were near it so to run away from it sure many people were chased away by this being and a week later began the rise of the swine flu so it was like trying to chase people out of like the like one of the main places that started fuck so this theory was also like heightened by a book in 1975 called the

mothman prophecies right by john keel who was the reporter who was collecting a lot of the ufo sightings and he said that the supernatural was at work with catastrophe and insinuated that maybe if you look around and see something mothman like to just stay away from that area because disaster is on its way and so it like warns you of impending doom oh my god so it's like good and evil at the same time because it's warning you but also like it's gonna happen evil to try to get rid of you and then apparently there's a big theory that the number 13 is also involved with the Mothman because most of the sightings from November 66 to December 67 was 13 month span. The Silver Bridge, the one link that was broken and caused the whole bridge to collapse was

the 13th steel pin Ibar. Point Pleasant has 13 letters in it. TNT, the area on, if you look at a map the tnt area is listed as pond 13 oh my god and most of the witnesses names have 13 letters what also a lot of the people who are involved in the case like john keel ends up being hospitalized on the 13th of every month what the how many are letters our names don't have that many no okay good mine is 11 mine's 17 put so yeah so i didn't go through too many of the stories because like you can literally go on google and there's like so many endless yeah like i wanted to do kind of like a black eyed

kids thing where i just told you a bunch of different personal stories but the history of it was really interesting so if you want there was a really good post it was like 26 stories of mothman that was the one i was gonna read to people but you can just go read that and astonishing legends did an awesome and they had to do multi-part yeah and they do the same topic together so it's like they had to do multiple episodes just for mothman yeah it was. But they talked about like the sightings. Sorry. What's the guy?

There was a guy who like would appear to people in a suit and be like, hello, I'm a human. Yeah. Like you're not a human. Like the guys, the guys that was Mary higher. Yeah. And the men in black. Right. The men in black.

And they would show up to people who had seen who had witnessed something and be like, i am a normal human yeah it was so creepy it's it really freaked me out in their episodes but holy crap yep i didn't know about all the 13 and the long-fingered dude and oh my god i think the long finger dude is the same hello i am a human guy maybe probably anyway tell me your story all right i as i told you i'm quite excited about today's story okay tell me and yours was also like a winner so we're gonna have a whopping episode today okay i'm gonna talk about lizzie borden no way i was in the airport uh in nashville and a friend of mine had messaged me and she and I had known each other in grad school at BU. And she was a like a graduate TA with me.

And we taught Comm 101 together. And her name's Allison. Oh, my God. There's so many Allison's that I'm bringing into the table. Her name's Allison. And she messaged me and we hadn't really talked like we weren't close in grad school, just like you and me. And she messaged me and was like, my friend and I really like your podcast. And we just went to the Lizzie Borden house. And like, it would be awesome if you could cover that. And I was like, hell, yeah. So this is for her. And for you. Yes, I've been to the house. And I love it. Yeah,

it's she said the same thing. And then I here's what i did i went into a okay so everyone we're not very cool right okay i mean i'm not right you might be okay but the fact that the other day you were like youtube's not a real thing and i was oh yeah that's her no but it is a thing apparently because i got sucked into buzzfeed unsolved on youtube today and i was like what the fuck and i was sitting in my little bean bag chair at nickelodeon like the most la person in the world and i was watching buzzfeed unsolved supernatural at the lizzie borton house and i was so amped up that when my friend josh was like hey you coming to lunch i about fucking punched him in the face. And I was like, I jumped like three feet in the air.

That is scaring the shit out of me. I got a lot of my information from there. If you want to scare the shit out of yourself, go watch it. Okay. Also, I found our calling because that is our calling. They sleep over at creepy haunted places. One of them is a skeptic and one of them isn't well that's not our calling well sure but the one who isn't will like tell the story of

what happened there and they'd be like seances and shit or like sleep at the place and film the whole thing well we can't take their idea no i know but i feel like we're kind of their like partners. Oh, okay. Yeah. In a less popular and less exciting way. I hear you. I hear you. Yep. But it's, but I was watching it and I was like, I want to do that.

Okay. It's so cool. They just go places and like sleep there and like videotape it. Okay. Yeah. Are you just humoring me? No, I'm about it. Okay.

Lizzie Borden. Yeah. Lizzie Borden. Yeah. Lizzie Borden. Took an ax, gave her mother 40 whacks. After she saw what she'd done, she gave her father 41. All right. Well, you ruined my little twist. In Virginia, that's what children sing to each other. It was actually made in England.

Really? Yep. Fun fact. Yep. Didn't know. My friend, Joanna, I was like, I'm doing Lizzie Borden today. And she was like, what's that?anna i was like i'm doing lizzie borden today and she was like what's that and i was like girl google it that's like the one that i've known my whole life but she's not into like true crime and stuff so i was like google it and she did and then um i told

her that little poem and she was like what the hell and i was like listen you people made it up yeah they think it was like either mother, that like anonymous like nursery rhyme character, or like a British. Or it's like you're like your scissor cutting, your scissor hand monster in Germany. It's like somewhere between Mother Goose and Krampus. Yeah, yeah, exactly. It's like Mother Krampus. It's like Europeans are like fucked up.

Lizzie Borden was born in Fall River, Massachusetts around 1860. Lizzie Borden was born in Fall River, Massachusetts around 1860. So her parents led pretty financially modest lives until her father prospered in the casket business. My favorite. Yep. I know the biz. You gotta know the biz. And became a successful property developer.

At the time of his death, his estate was valued at $300,000, which today is over $8 million. I have that. That's why I'm casual. We'll just go buy it. It's like the podcasting fortune we've built. Oh, yeah. $8 million. It's like in Austin Powers, and he's like, $1 million.

And they're like, that's literally no money at all. Yes, correct. But although her father was pretty wealthy, Lizzie and her family lived a pretty frugal lifestyle. So her dad was a penny pincher, quote unquote. They didn't have amenities that most wealthy people had at the time, including plumbing and electricity. So he was like very stringent about what they had at their house. Right. Lizzie and her sister Emma had a pretty religious upbringing. Lizzie herself was very involved in her local

church she taught Sunday school to children of immigrants who had just moved to the United States and her mother died when she was pretty young so three years after her mother died her father married a woman named Abby Durfee and Lizzie believed Abby was after her father's money and um although she called Abby mother for a while their relationship grew pretty strained and she started calling her Mrs. Borden instead of Abby or mom so it was a little bit it was like a transition because originally she and Emma called her mother or mom right or Abby and then after a while, they started calling her Mrs. Borden, which is just creepy. Can you imagine calling your mom, like, Mrs.?

Well, I wouldn't even know what last name to go with. I don't either. There's a lot of options. I tried to figure out what I should call your mom when I first met her. I know, you were like, what do I call her? I'm like, Renata. Just do it. Yeah, because this was the first time I've actually met Renata this week.

Yes. It's the only constant, though. No offense, mom, but it's the only constant. That's true. I was like, do I call you Ms. Sturdivant, Ms. Schieffer, Ms. Renata? Here's the thing. Her middle name used to be Christine. Like, she named me after her own middle name.

And then she got married a couple times and was like, oh, forget my middle name. I'm going to put my maiden name as my middle name and then replace my last name. She got rid of Christine. She just cancelled it out of her name. That's nice. That kind of offends me. My mom's maiden name. Middle name. Her middle name is Diane.

Linda Diane. That's a much American name. I know. My mother's is Renate Christina Kaiser. What a German name. Now she changed it from Christine to Kaiser. Stupid. Anyway, this is bananas. In May of 1892, Lizzie's father, Andrew, killed the pigeons in his barn with a hatchet, believing they were attracting local children to hunt them.

barn with a hatchet believing they were attracting local children to hunt them lizzie was distraught because she had built a roost for the pigeons and was upset that they were killed and two months later so 1892 was like a very fateful year for this family yeah it was 100 years before i was born so sure it was just leading up to the great things bound to be right a fateful destined one might say yes 1891 100 years before i was born nothing interesting happened no we know that 1892 was like the time booming you boom in time so the pigeons were all killed with a hatchet which is also just like what the i mean sociopath whatever so the pigeons were all killed then two months later a family argument prompted uh lizzie and her sister emma to take extended vacations to new bedford massachusetts to just

get away from their family and then when a few weeks later lizzie returned home to fall river and instead of going back home uh she stayed a few days at a rooming house before finally feeling comfortable enough to move back to the family home. And meanwhile, tension within the family was growing because Andrew, her father, was giving away real estate to people in his wife, Abby's family. So like in-laws and stuff. He was kind of just giving away property. Must be nice. Property.

Oh, you want my land? Just go on. I've got enough. What? That must be nice. Just people to pass off land like that i mean not if it's your dad giving away property no i mean it must be nice to be him to just have just like oh sure but he's also very penny pinching he's not even he doesn't even have a toilet in his house that's true and that was like pretty i mean pretty common i'm gonna tell you my house in ohio was built in 1890 and it was built with indoor plumbing and it wasn't like super fancy or anything.

But like, do you still like original plumbing? Like what's the flush level? Not great. I'm going to be honest. That's like the one thing I demand wherever I live is that the water pressure is going to be real good. It's all very fine. It's definitely like 1890s plumbing got it no it's okay you know what we'll find out on october 13th good luck with that when you requested to not pay

for a hotel room this is what you're getting out of it so i want free board aka 1890s toilets but also water pressure please thank you yep so she moved back into her family's house. And meanwhile, tension was growing within the family. The family then, all of them, got very sick. For several days, everyone in the household was violently ill. So a family friend later said it could have been mutton that they left on the stove for several days worth of meals. But Abby, the stepmothermother was worried someone was poisoning them because andrew her husband wasn't a very popular guy around town and very wealthy oh yeah so they were like oh it's either the mutton we're eating for many many days at a time or someone's poisoning

our milk and also at the time they weren't using refrigeration so like it was like keep it on the stove they didn't know electricity yeah yeah so it could really could just been bad meat. They literally didn't have toilets in the house. Like they had nothing indoor plumbing or electricity. Yeah. Exactly. So it could have very well been like bad meat. Just trying to be frugal about what they ate.

Right. On August 3rd of 1892. So this is like two months later. Lizzie's uncle, John Morse, came to stay with the family to discuss business matters with andrew and this led to more tension within the family because he was uh lizzie's mom's brother so the mom who had died the mom who died so he's not technically like in the fam anymore he's an in-law right so he showed up and was like we need to talk money and business. And apparently that was like not pretty and things were not going great. And again, Andrew was like really frugal and was not wanting to like help out.

And now I'm going to give a fun timeline from a website. So this website really helped me a lot in terms of like the way you said with Mothman, how it was kind of hard to like figure out how to tell the story. Like this really, I wrote it out four times until I, three times until i figured out like the best way to do it and this website called all that's interesting.com oh are we on there ati weird dude we're the front page knew it all that's interesting home page yeah yes ati atwwd nope that's interesting. Home page. Yeah. Yes. ATI ATWWD. Nope. That's not us.

Here's the timeline. I'm ready. Morning of August 4th, 1892. The Borden house. Everyone woke up really early. The maid of the family, an Irish immigrant named Bridget Maggie Sullivan, served breakfast to Andrew and his wife Abby as usual. Emma, the older daughter,

was away visiting friends. I'm sure. I don't usually have paper notes. Sorry. We went very old school today. Neither of us brought our computers. It's amazing. Wow. We're recording this on a tape recorder.

On a wooden hoop and a stick. Eva's sitting here churning like a... Churning butter. A rock. Yep, a butter. What were you going to say? A rock. I don't know.

A churning a rock. Eva, you've got it all wrong. I was trying to think how you could record something on a rock. I don't know. You know what? Eva's sitting here on an 1890s toilet with no water pitcher. Churning butter. Eating mutton.

Eating mutton. Oh, no. Oh, no. Okay. I regret everything. Okay. Oh, that's the sound of my horse and buggy. There's my friend. Coming to pick you up of my horse and buggy. There's my friend.

Coming to pick you up in his horse and buggy. All right. Cute. Thanks. Okay. So, Maggie, Bridget, the maid. Was making breakfast or something. She served breakfast to Andrew and Abby, as usual.

Emma was away visiting friends in another town yes which i call bullshit on interesting because because what because why but okay sure i just feel like when you're away like you're we're addressing an alibi for like months so like oh that's why not you know i just want to be interesting i mean sure i mean it's all things interesting definitely gonna get interesting whether she's away or not. So I feel like. I just wanted Emma to be part of the fun. Part of the melee. So Lizzie slept in that day.

She came downstairs after her uncle, John, had left the house. So remember, he came the day before to like talk money. Who could forget? Yeah. Yeah. Who could forget? John. Uncle John.

Lizzie decided against eating breakfast. Andrew, her father, decided to go downtown around 9 in the morning. And while he was away, Abby, Lizzie's stepmother, went upstairs to make the bed that Uncle John had slept in the night before in the guest room. So at one point, she left the room to get fresh pillowcases. But other than that, she was in that room. Meanwhile, Andrew, Lizzie's father, had returned home and his key didn't work so he knocked on the front door and the maid bridget let him in lizzie came downstairs and claimed that abby or mrs borden as she called her had left the house after learning that a friend of hers was sick

and andrew believed the story settled in on a sofa in the sitting room and took a nap bridget who was bridget the maid who was not feeling well who had been throwing up that morning from that sickness that they all had went to take a nap in her room and awoke shortly after to the sound of lizzie screaming downstairs and the thing she heard lizzie screaming was, quote, Bridget, come quick. Father's dead. I'm sorry. This is wrong. The sound of Lizzie screaming. Bridget, come quick.

Father's not dead. Is that better? I'm sorry. I did a control F and I changed the name. Okay, here we go. Oh, my God. Let me say it again. So she heard Lizzie screaming downstairs.

She heard her screaming,ie come quick father's dead somebody's come in and killed him and so bridget or maggie as they called her ran downstairs to find andrew slumped on the couch in the living room his head hacked 10 times with some sort of a hatchet one of his his eyeballs, this is gross. Yeah, I've seen the picture. PS warning, had been split cleanly in two, suggesting that he'd been asleep when he was attacked. He was still bleeding, meaning the attack had been recent. So Lizzie asked Bridget to go find the doctor across the street, and Bridget returned soon after with one of the neighbors, and the commotion summoned more neighbors who called the police and at this point Abby's whereabouts the stepmother were still unknown

Lizzie told the gathering crowd of neighbors the same story she told her father which was that her stepmother had received a note saying her friend was sick and then she had to leave the house but when Bridget and one of the neighbors went upstairs, they saw Abby's feet sticking out from behind her bed. And at first they thought she may have fainted after seeing her husband's dead body downstairs. But when they walked to the other side of the bed, they saw her body face down in a pool of her own blood. Yep. Did you see the pictures? Yep.

They're wild. They're not fun. According to the forensic investigation abby was facing her killer at the time of the attack she was struck on the side of the head with a hatchet which cut her just above the ear which caused her to turn and then face fall face down on the floor and then her killer struck her 19 times on the back of the head until she was dead with a hatchet like object so they're dead oh yeah let's discuss let's discuss my friends at all that's interesting.com put it this way which i thought was very interesting quote was lizzie borden just a sweet sunday school teacher unfairly blamed for

her parents deaths yes or did she brutally and methodically murder her parents and get away with it so yes to both oh no she's guilty oh you think she's guilty oh yeah she's guilty okay let's crack into it let's do that so lizzie's sister emma was out of town at the time so she's pretty much out of the picture as far as like immediate suspects go um even though you apparently think that she was guilty but we'll get into that later i mean i think of all lizzie is hella guilty okay but so emma is like out of it for now sure as far as the police investigation they were like she's not there so at the at first the police did not suspect lizzie uh she swore she was in the barn when the attacks took place uh and you know she was a white woman of wealth and they were like she couldn't have been

right right the suspect so they did not question her at first but in the days following the murders a lot of clues began to confuse the investigation and suspicion started to fall on lizzie first they found a bloody hatchet on a neighboring farm but that turned out to have been used to kill chickens so that was out got it uh then a man had been reportedly seen wandering the property but he had an airtight alibi so that was canceled out in the basement police found two hatchets two axes and a hatchet head with a broken handle which was determined to be the murder weapon, because the break in the handle was fresh, and the dust on the head of the hatchet had been applied manually. So someone had tried to make it look like it was sitting there for a long time.

And there was no blood on it. So police stationed themselves around the house after the day of the murder. And later that night, an officer saw Lizzie enter the basement and bend over the pails containing her parents' bloody clothing. And she kind of looked through them. And that was all. And then there's that note that Lizzie claimed her stepmother received about a sick friend. So Abby had clearly never left the house after she had apparently received this note so they looked for the note and they were like well if there was a note that she had received where was it and then lizzie told her friend alice russell that her stepmother must

have accidentally burned it uh-huh yeah you know right of course yep uh investigators also discovered that the day before the murders took place, Lizzie had tried to buy something called prussic acid, a.k.a. cyanide, from a local drugstore. But the clerk said she needed a prescription before she could purchase it. And that was later ruled inadmissible in court because it didn't directly relate. Right. Like no one had been killed with cyanide. Right. Although maybe in the mutton.

There was not. Okay. Nope. They searched it. They searched the milk. They searched the mutton. They searched their stomach contents. No poison.

Got it. Which I was going to say. But I'll just sort it in now. Okay. So a few days later. So Alice Russell, the friend. Yeah. Who was staying with Lizzie at the time.

Saw Lizzie burning one of her dresses at the stove in her house. Uh-huh. A likely story. When she asked why she was burning her dress, she said, well, it's stained, so it can't be worn anymore, so I'm going to burn it. I mean, that's what I do with all my clothes. It's like... Goodwill wasn't around back then, so what were going to burn it. I mean, that's what I do with all my clothes. It's like... Goodwill wasn't around back then. No.

So what were you to do? What were you to do? You know, like... You have enough quilts. I wore a new blouse to our meetup in Nashville. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. And I spilled lots of things on it.

All alcohol? All alcohol. It's very flammable. It's very easy to just burn it up. You might as well just do it before the fire gets you first you don't want to just have it hanging as a fire hazard in your home right of course yep i think it makes perfect sense i think so too so she set her entire dress ablaze ablaze however uh-huh this is a fun one too i love fun things there are plenty of other theories regarding what could have happened to the bloody clothes if there were any because uh the number of hatchet

axe wounds to the head would have as investigators determined would have left a whole bloody mess on whoever had done it and since lizzie's dress did not have blood on it as far as bridget the maid had testified this is what may have happened if there had been bloody clothes so lizzie was actually menstruating that day oh my god okay here we go she was on her period right and even while the police searched the house for clues they actually so she at one point carried down like several bloody rags from her bedroom and since they were you know proper victorian gentlemen they all turned around and did not want anything to do with the menstruation situation that was going on out of fear not respect by the way because they're gentlemen okay it's not like

oh we want to respect you and your womanhood. It's like, get away. It's like, you're disgusting. Yeah. And we don't want to look at it. Move, pig. Something disgusting and horrible like that. Get out the way.

Get out the way. Move, bitch. Get out the way. My favorite song. Yes. I mean, they definitely sang that in the 1890s. Yeah. They had a whole, oh man, I'm picturing the dance oh it's so good

so anyway that was part of the problem is that she was apparently menstruating and she had a lot of bloody rags and clothing that she was actually removing from the house and bridget the maid actually carried out a bundle of bloody clothing out of the house as part of uh lizzie's you know period rags i don't know what you call them back then menstruation rags i don't know they literally use rags right i mean that's the phrase on the rag on the right exactly it's a really feminist supporting way to say you're on your period on the right i also like how you said that her menstruating was part of the problem and i'm like isn't it always that seems to still be something that men will say i mean correct it's always yeah correct as someone who's currently on the rag oh my what the fuck was that

what was that was that my phone yeah but what was weird is it made the sound that my phone makes when i know that sounded like you've got mail what the fuck lizzie borden doesn't like us talking about her menstruation shit my phone knows when i'm on my period okay here's the thing tell me the thing that scared me i'm gonna be honest that really scared me okay so she was on her period so they were like well she cared about i had a bunch of bloody clothes and then her lawyers were like well she was bleeding out of her uterus who huh sure and just imagine whatever they say back then yep her hoo-ha her hoo-ha her hoo-ha was bleeding so her bleeder was bleeding i don't know oh oh my let's change the topic change the topic

why don't we have like one of those inserts? Here's the thing. I think I'd really like to hear you keep talking about it, though. I don't want to. Take it back. Please keep talking. You know I'm going to fill the void and it's just going to get worse. So here's the thing.

This is where another fun theory comes in, that she did the crime naked. Because her clothes. So, okay. My favorite so far. Oh, God damn oh god damn it but it's because no it's probably because it's interesting so you could just yeah it's interesting it's x-rated but also it's because so she could just throw wash her body off and put the clothes right back on it'd be like oh you had no blood on your clothes exactly and the thing was genius too that her dress that bridget the maid saw her in she's like i saw her in a blue dress i had no stains on it and they were like well she could have changed but the dresses in the time were so fucking complicated to put on their bodies i see you can't just like murder

people it's not like a maxi dress no you can't just like throw a piece of cotton on your body it's like you gotta tie yourself in you gotta have someone help you. Right. Right. Yourself. It's a whole thing. And so being able to like fucking murder two people and then change real quick and get rid of your dress. It's like wasn't it wasn't. I mean, that's a multitasker. Multitasker indeed.

And so that's why a lot of people think maybe not a lot of people, but it's definitely a theory that she may have done it in the nude. Well, I am a big fan of america's next top model i feel like that could be like one of the uh one of the tests like okay you have 30 seconds to get in a very complicated outfit murder two people and do do this take this hatchet murder your loved ones and then put on a corset 45 seconds ago change inside a bloodbath of a crime scene and every way you do it tyra banks is gonna be mad yeah yeah but her eyes are gonna look so good yeah oh yeah the smoky eye is gonna get you yeah so it doesn't matter where you need to be it

doesn't really matter um and that's the moral of the story but i'm gonna keep talking so they did an inquest and they were like we're gonna figure out whether lizzie did it during the inquest lizzie's behavior was erratic she often contradicted herself uh at one point she claimed to for example have taken her father's shoes off him when he came home but like all the crime scene photos he was always wearing shoes so like she would just say things and then the next time be like no that i didn't say that that didn't happen like she just was like completely off her rocker in the answers however this is something they don't usually talk about she had been prescribed regular doses of morphine to calm her nerves so it's very possible that her testimony was affected by this and as

someone who has been hospitalized several times and been on morphine and has been witnessed personally by m schultz christina morphine christine on morphine is just the greatest morphine christine is her own character she's a force to be reckoned with and i will say if someone questioned me in a courtroom while i was high on morphine it'd be the happiest i got a lot the happiest response you've ever gotten is what it would be maybe not if it was murdered my murdered parents but yeah i would have a lot to say and it would probably not make any fucking sense so you gotta consider that is all i'm saying is all i'm saying um because back then they were

like oh here's a prescription of fucking morphine to like also sign me up where the fuck calm you down yeah oh my gosh i could use a real nice little shot of morphine what a mess um so so then the inquest determined that she was guilty so they sent her to trial and uh her trial took place in new bedford massachusetts starting june 5th 1893 it was widely publicized and became a media sensation especially because she was a woman the victim's heads were removed during autopsy and the skulls were used as evidence during the trial oh boy and at one point the tissue paper covering her father's skull blew off and she saw it and completely fainted and passed out in the courtroom and then later they buried the heads of her father and her stepmother at the feet

of their graves which i thought was a little strange but you know whatever on june 20th after deliberating only 90 minutes the jury of apparently 12 mustachioed men acquitted her and said there's, she's innocent. She's not guilty. There's no way she could have done it. Right. However, as you have guessed,

and I'm sure many people have guessed, most people still believe she did it. Yeah. Let's get into theories real quick. After Lizzie was acquitted, no one else was charged. And here are the suspects that are still discussed to this day so obviously lizzie herself is the number one suspect although she was acquitted at trial she remains a prime suspect one writer has proposed that she

committed the murders while in a fugue state because apparently this is another theory i don't know if this is related i mean it's related i don't know if it's like the same thing but some people argue that she and i think this is more of a victorian era theory but that while she was menstruating she would get these like um seizures and they would send her into a fugue state like hysteria like petite mall seizures and like not hysteria but like uh just a total like fugue state where she would just not remember. Just go dissociative. Yeah. And she would just have a seizure and it would, like, completely disassociate her from reality.

So that was one theory. Another prominent theory suggests that she was physically and sexually abused by her father. Oh, boy. But there is little evidence to support that. But, again, incest is not something they would have discussed at the time. So it's sometimes thought like maybe that's a possibility. And like obviously as far as physical evidence goes, they were not collecting that kind of evidence. So who knows? But also there really is no evidence to support that.

But some people do propose that theory. And then here's another one. This is a good one. Bridget Sullivanivan the maid uh some people believe that she went into a rage at being ordered to clean the windows on a hot day i would 110 degrees that day apparently cleaning the windows was the worst possible thing to be doing and she did not have a good relationship with uh the woman of the household abby she was still recovering from her like flu or food poisoning or whatever some people think maybe she snapped well i also yeah

that's what i was i remember because i in the tour you get to see everyone's rooms you get to stand in their rooms you get to like creepily fucking take pictures on like the things that people died on but uh you get to go into the room that Maggie stayed in, Bridget. Yeah. And it's literally up in the attic. It's the smallest fucking room on earth. I mean, also heat rises and it's like a wooden house. So you're just baking in this fucking house in heavy clothing and it's in the hundreds. And she had severe food poisoning.

Yeah. And apparently the theory is that like Abby was saying like you have to you have to clean the uh the windows you have to clean the windows and it was like like imagine the worst food poisoning of your life it's 110 degrees it is fucking burning in your house and you're expected to wear like really heavy tight constricting clothes and all you want to do is run to the bathroom which without fucking toilets by the way and also your boss is demanding that you clean the windows so that's one of the theories and then there's it sounds like hell there's a counter to that okay because apparently two boys broke into the house while the police were like investigating because they called the police and like obviously they were like getting the bodies and two little boys like broke into the

attic and climbed up there and they were later questioned and they said like since the two windows were open it was actually much cooler than the rest of the house because um of the cross draft and so they went up there and like checked the temperatures and it was actually much cooler than people had like insinuated like oh well it must be hot because it's up there but apparently the way that the windows were open anyway it wasn't as hot which was just a weird yeah thing and they were and a lot of people said like she had worked there for so many years like it like why wouldn't they have a day off well but like why would she suddenly be like i'm gonna put 17 oh yeah hatchet blows into your head because you're not letting me pent up rage yeah yeah yeah which i

yeah which i get but then also like why would lizzie cover for you or whatever like it just seems like a lot so but it is a possibility yes so that is one of the possibilities another thought was that uh john the uncle who was staying at the house um had somehow been upset about like their financial arrangement and he and um andrew had like kind of a business together and so he was maybe upset that like things weren't going well and snapped and he had quote-unquote axed them himself got it but again like that's there's no hard evidence for that, except that he rarely spoke to them after the murders. But also like I probably wouldn't either. Right.

Yeah. So scary and awful. I probably wouldn't talk to them either. So who knows? Now, this is a very interesting theory. OK, we'll talk about it. So one author named Ed McBain wrote a novel called Lizzie in 1984, and he suggested that Lizzie committed the murders after being caught in a lesbian trust with Bridget the maid. And he basically speculated that Abby, the stepmother, had caught Lizzie and Bridget together, had reacted with horror and disgust, and that Lizzie had then killed Abby with a candlestick.

And when Andrew, her father, returned home, she had confessed he had reacted the same way. So she had hatcheted him to death. And then basically Bridget covered for her. And the only reason this is kind of like supported in later years is that Lizzie was later rumored to be a lesbian um although bridget later married a man which doesn't necessarily mean much in the 1920s but yeah uh bridget allegedly gave a deathbed confession to her sister stating that she had changed her testimony in order to protect lizzie on the stand that was like before she died that's

what she said that she had changed her testimony i believe it i mean also i'm going off of a very vague reference but there is a lizzie borden movie with christina ricci which oh yes by the way like she is exactly what i imagine this important to be like and uh i think i i could also be like putting it in my own head but i think in that movie they like kind of hinted that there was a lesbian relationship where like they never said anything out loud but the characters in the movie like looked at each other a little too long and all that yeah yeah apparently that movie got real shit rating because i was gonna watch it it's it's it has really bad ratings but if you like the lizzie borden story it's still worth seeing at least once i might watch it yeah but yeah so uh the only problem with that too is

like okay so lizzie never married um she and emma her sister never married um she also later became very close friends with an actress named nance o'neill who was referred to by feminists as an overt lesbian and because of that uh her sister emma moved out of their house because she was uncomfortable with her friendship with got it this actress who was a lesbian and actually after her sister moved out in 1905 she never saw her again really yeah so she moved out and it was such a big problem that they never saw each other again. But that being said, there's a counter argument just because someone isn't married by 30 doesn't mean they're a lesbian because they don't marry a man,

you know? So there's like that whole issue of like, okay, she didn't get married. That doesn't mean she's gay. Right. And just because she's gay doesn't mean she's having an affair with the maid.

Right. It's like a little bit like a lot of assumptions are like layered on top and people are creating like kind of dramatic tales out of it which is like not necessarily well i love a dramatic lesbian layered tale i know and it's like a fun theory but it's also like maybe not the most like politically correct plausible well i don't know maybe not politically correct either but not the most plausible or the most likely um so all in all as far as i'm concerned i think either lizzie or bridget did it because someone would have had to have hidden in the house the entire time waiting for you know the dad to come home the stepmom to come home right and somehow hidden from bridget and lizzie if they were hiding

in the house right and officials after they walked in unless they ran off but everyone would see a bloody man running exactly and bridget lizzie like somehow didn't happen to see what was going on and lizzie also had a motive which was that she had a been angry with her parents for several days over financial issues and was also set to receive a huge inheritance um from her father's will if both he and abby were dead so after the trial the borden sisters moved into a large modern house in the Hill neighborhood in Fall River, which was a super fashionable area. They had plumbing. They had electricity. They had a really fashionable home.

Right. Lizzie changed her name to Elizabeth. And at their new house, the sisters had a staff. They had live-in maids, a housekeeper, a coachman. a housekeeper a coachman and um because abby said the stepmom was ruled to have died before andrew her entire estate went to andrew and then when he died his entire state went to them so it was the timing of it that really like they got a huge settlement out of it made out like a bandit got a huge part of his estate yep and then um ab Abby's family did get like a big settlement out of, you know, her death. But still, they got a lot of money and a lot of property out of it.

Lisbeth was ostracized by society despite her being acquitted. Right. Her name was, a couple years later, brought back into the public eye because she was accused of shoplifting in 1897 in rhode island people refused to sit near her at church children would ring her doorbell in the middle of the night and pelt her house with gravel and eggs oh you know at least nowadays we just egg houses we don't gravel them that would suck i feel like eggs are worse. I feel like gravel's worse. Getting pelted with rocks? Yeah, but it's just your house.

If you pelt a house with eggs, then you have to power hose it. I'm imagining she opened the door and then they threw gravel. Okay, whatever. Well, I don't know. Who knows? Maybe Lizzie can let us know. No, please don't. Em, we're getting to your favorite part.

You ready? Oh, yeah. don't and we're getting to your favorite part you ready oh yeah so lizzie got her lizbeth got her gallbladder removed uh and she got sick and she died of pneumonia on june 1st 1927 age 66 nine days later her sister emma died at the age of 76 in a nursing home in new hampshire so even though they had never seen each other after their split up they both they died within days yeah of each other so the sisters neither of them had ever married they were buried side by side in the family plot next to their parents which is just such an interesting concept to me that like the parents were buried their

skulls at their feet and then the sisters stopped speaking and then they were both buried next to each other next to their parents that they may have killed it's like so much drama after death just like packed into one little plot yeah oh my god imagine like assuming they all went to heaven not likely but like if you imagine them like at the gates imagine the drama before they walked oh my god imagine the parents showing up at the gates being like, oh, no, no, no, no. Imagine the parents being like, my fucking head isn't even on my shoulders. They put my head below my feet. Yeah. The fuck?

The fuck is that about? Yeah. P.S. You can see their skulls on the internet. It's not okay. It's not. They're bashed in pretty bad. Yeah, they're fucked up.

It's not. They're bashed in pretty bad. Yeah, they're fucked up. So, Elizabeth left $30,000 to the Fall River Animal Rescue League, which today is about $567,000. Casual. She also left about $500, today $9,000, in trust to care for her father's grave. She was the source of this lovely poem that you've already referenced and that I have been repeating in my head over and over. Lizzie Borden took an axe and gave her mother 40 whacks. After she saw what she'd done, she gave her father 41.

Correct. Which isn't actually accurate. No, it is not. As you have just learned from my story. Yes, just now. no it is not as you have just learned from my story yes just now the borden home is now a museum and a bed and breakfast uh as my friend allison clearly can attest to and apparently you can as well yeah you can literally like they let you sit on the couch that her father's head was fucking beaten into i got some fun facts here i've sat on the couch guests can tour the property uh

watch an annual dramatization of the events which by the way i watched it and it was kind of hilarious because it was like yeah 2008 they used like ariel powerpoint font to like yeah title all the and it was so mean i'm sorry but it's all these actors being like, oh, like I found his body in the room. And there's all these like 2008 tourists with like Kodak disposable cameras. Oh, my God. Click, click, click, click. And I'm like, this is so awful to watch.

But it's pretty comical. It's such a mockery. I'm sure in person it's not comical. Right, right, right. Watching it on YouTube was pretty comical. But it is really horribly eerie. It a mockery it really is um so you can watch a dramatization on the anniversary each year you can stay overnight in the bedrooms originally occupied by lizzie emma and their parents and even enjoy the same exact breakfast that they ate the day

they died yeah so that the breakfast that maggie or bridget made for andrew and abby you can the next morning if you stay there they serve you the same breakfast yep it's so fucked up and then i read this really fun article on jezebel.com called my sleepless night alone at the haunted lizzie borden b&b I was like, this is why I wanted to study journalism back in the day. So this is the author. Okay, so the article is brilliantly written and hilarious and creepy, and you should read it. But some of the little excerpts. She explained that graphic crime scene photos are prominently displayed in the rooms.

A lot of signs jokingly tell you to watch your head. I mean, come on.'s true and the i can i can confirm and the dining room china cabinet contains two model skulls that shows exactly uh how the bordens were bludgeoned i was gonna say that earlier when you said you can see pictures of the skulls i was like actually you can see like makeshift versions of their brains because if you go on a tour they'll hold the skulls to show you how they like yeah she was saying that when she like walked in so she's seeing one of the rooms that they said was the only room that wasn't haunted on site but like she said when she walked into mrs borden's room like abby's room that they were like oh do you want to lie down where she was yeah and you

can take this is where it gets like super disrespectful because like they can take you can take well not only that. So she didn't die on the bed. She died on the floor right next to her bed. And so they will literally ask if you want, you can lie down. Like you just said, they have pictures of all the crime scene photos. It's so fucked up. So you can, and the same carpet is there.

So you can see the picture from a hundred years ago and see the same carpet that you're standing on. And if you want, you can standing on and if you want you can the picture is there so you can mirror it perfectly put your feet out so where you're on the landing you can see your feet from where they saw her feet and thought maybe she fainted but no she'd fucking been bludgeoned and you can lie there and put your head exactly where her head was like it's so fucked up like how like you could put your like you can intentionally put your face down on a piece of carpet that you know 100 years ago had blood and brains on and also you know so many people have like put their face on it to be like look i'm being a murdered murder victim yeah

ha ha ha and also like the um the the couch that the the dad died on i think the only reason i sat on it um i know that the couch itself apparently got changed out or something like that i think they put like a replica couch yeah it was like so i felt okay sitting on it and that like hey i came to the lizzie borden house and took a picture but i didn't like there are people who like reenact like lie there and look like they're dead and bananas because if you watch i just sat there and just kind of like half like did like that white people smile where i'm like i'm uncomfortable but here i am you're like okay mom take a photo like the closed smile where everyone's uncomfortable including me that's what i did on the couch if you

watch those youtube videos like they literally have actors lie down and then they put bloody sheets over their heads yeah and they're like look it's a bludgeon they're like oh mr so mr legend to devon you're like what the fuck like this really fucked up happened and so they have okay so this is the best part i don't know if you know about this have you spent the night you didn't spend the night there did you i refused to okay good i refuse to here's the thing so they have a fun thing called the ouija board oh of the house okay okay okay so they have a house ouija board. Oh. Of the house. Okay. Okay. Okay.

So they have a house Ouija board. According to legend, it was stolen a few years ago, only to be returned months later with an ominous note reading, please make it stop. Oh, shit. Returned to the house. The author of this Jezebel article did the ouija board with the other people that were staying there nothing too interesting happened but i think they were doing it wrong because the way they described it i was like that's not how ouija board works but okay they were like we

each put our one finger on at a time and i was like that's no how it works but okay but yeah so that's the story of the lizzie borden house it's fucking haunted and i watched buzzfeed unsolved and i was so jumpy that my friend josh was like want to go to lunch and i almost i literally almost broke his fucking jaw because i was like get away from me it's that that i'm so lame that i didn't know youtube was such a cool thing and then i started watching it and now i'm terrified to sleep good so um So check it out. Okay. It's scary as shit. Also, you should at least go to the house at least once.

Sometime. I will. It's worth the tour. Because also the girl that I went, the tour guide that I had, she was, that was probably the most knowledgeable tour guide I've ever had in my entire life. I couldn't tell you. Well, because the tour guide on this one was also similar. I couldn't tell you well because the tour guide on this one was also similar and she had a

hatchet tattoo on her hand because she was that devoted to the story I don't remember but I mean the only reason I went is because we were in we lived in Boston and so it was just like easy to go I remember her being so knowledgeable that like you still don't know at the end

like who did it but she makes like her the way that she described theory i mean she made it very clear that like lizzie did it oh because the host or the tour guide with the hatchet thing she believed that i think she believed the uncle did it oh weird yeah no this girl was like who's to say like she did a very good job of like giving you every theory make it very but she like very much hinted that like if you don't think it's lizzie by the end of this you're a fucking idiot interesting because this one apparently was like no i'm 100 convinced it was weird maybe you have to it's like it's like you're like

trading cards like you have to go with each tour guide to get the whole story. Ah! No, let's not. Let's go, but let's not spend the night. Let's go and pay all of them to tell us the same story all at one time. The BuzzFeed Unsolved people, they spent the night there. And I'm like, Em, this is literally our... Well, the only reason I don't want to stay in there is because the upstairs is relatively small. That I can remember. They had to share a bed.

We shared a bed, though. But it was a queen's bed. Yeah, but we shared a bed that didn't, as far as as we know didn't have several blood stains hidden in the fibers of the carpet but like i mean it's it's very it's super eerie what if you okay this is a really weird question but what if you like stayed there and you like had sex in that room like wouldn't that be weird to be like i had sex in lizzie borden's room i think the only because i read that people went on their anniversary and i'm like what yeah it's a big anniversary spot which really fucks me up weird place to like the only way i can possibly be okay with someone doing

that and like not judging them is that if it's like he the moment you can't control it and then afterwards you're like oh my god we just fucking did that i feel so gross you're like we're gonna eat johnny cakes for breakfast and then we're gonna get out of here yeah exactly it's just so weird to me to be like there's no way i could enjoy any of that knowing that in the exact same bed someone was literally brutally murdered two feet away from where her body was fucking bludgeoned 17 times blood like you're in the bed that blood definitely horrifying horrifying uh so speaking of lizzie's there was a lizzie that was at our show okay um who was also at our meetup we saw her right often at this weekend. Yes. And her boyfriend wanted to ask us a question.

Apparently, never got to. Oh, okay. But so she related to me. I said I would ask you on the show. Great. I'm excited. Her boyfriend wanted to know, what is the Mount Rushmore of paranormal hauntings? Like, if there was a category of ghosts that deserved like

a monument like that what would it be oh like would it be a specific poltergeist like his his thought was if they were to put a category of ghosts in a mountain okay it would be victorian children oh shit because they're so fucking creepy they got these weird outfits yeah so like is there a category or they're like specific ones like who's like the fucking scariest oh that's good i think children's toys okay so like what like a raggedy and all like yeah like the robert the doll oh no um okay okay and the why can't i fucking think of her name right now the raggedy ann doll yeah what's her name in real life though oh uh annabelle annabelle like i think dolls ew a doll mountain that's creepy you're right if you had to put like a category of ghost would your mount rushmore of ghosts mine would be more like people like um

i feel like okay here's what i think mine would be so it would be like the man with the hat like that people see when they have sleep paralysis yeah okay and then like the old hag people see when they have sleep paralysis so sleep paralysis characters yes i feel like it would be those like classic characters that people like. Dear David is like his own little rock formation. Yes. I feel like it would just be visuals that people see when they have sleep paralysis or like traumatic nightmares.

Cool. Yeah. What do you think, Eva? I know. Just throwing you in the... You don't have to have an answer. If I do, it would just be Slenderman all the way up. Slenderman!

Oh! Just four pictures of Slenderman one by one. Oh my god, it would be just like super skinny rocks. That's actually really scary. Anyway, I wanted to end on that. Slenderman rocks. I was going to ask you while we were at the bar, but you were too far gone. So I was like, I'll ask later. I was going to yell about Glenn and how I probably got him fired.

Yes. Hashtag sorry, Glenn. Anyway, thank you guys so much for listening to this long ass story. Sorry, Eva, for having to make you edit that. Yeah, good luck. What does it say? What's the time? 1.32.

It's not bad. Oh, it's really not bad. Congratulations, Eva. It's not going to be that bad. Dude, we used to go four plus hours. I don't know how we did that. I don't know how we did this. I don't know how we did that is what I mean. we did this i don't know how we did that is what i mean we really like we used to be like literally four hours i would show up at six o'clock we would start recording at eight and then i would leave

at 2 a.m easily every week that was amazing and then we would do it on saturday so you had to edit it in one day that was the big problem is when we i would immediately start editing and it would be like 2 a.m and people would be like where's the episode and I'm like I literally we just finished we just finished recording it actually so good luck sorry I were making it worse okay okay um tell us tell the world about our our presence in oh my cybersphere. Go. Jesus. Go. You can find us at Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram, ATWWD Podcast. You can also find our

Patreon at ATWWD Podcast. Please donate. The reason that we're able to do things like go to CrimeCon is because you guys are able to help us get

there. Thank you. Again, thank you to everyone who came to CrimeCon. That was our first live show, so you guys are all ingrained in

our memory officially. We got to hug all of you. That was our first live show, so you guys are all ingrained in our memory officially. We got to hug all of you. It was amazing. Especially the guy that gave us certificates. Oh, man. I got one for saying listen the most times. And I got one for having more than 50% of my makeouts end in celery in my mouth. So thank you to that guy.

Beautiful. Same with Steven. You can also find our website and that's why we drink.com you can find our merch at and that's why we drink.bigcartel.com you can find our email and that's why we drink at gmail.com where you can send in your listeners stories with eva and we put out a new listeners episode every first of the month also eva's going on vacation so if we don't respond really quickly, I'm sorry. It's because Eva's gone.

She's having a really fun time, so leave her alone. She's in Morocco. Okay, go. You can also find our mailing address at 1920 Hillhurst Ave, Los Angeles, California, 90027. Number 265. Correct. So 1920 Hillhurst Ave, number 265. Yes, correct hillhurst ave number 265 yes correct los angeles california 90027 i think is that it listen that's all we got we just want to say hi and we love you

also uh again happy mother's day i'm going to reuse last mother's day's song finch song and send that to my mom as if it's brand new. Hopefully she's forgotten. Oh my God, we should close out on that song. Okay, Eva, are you listening? Wine and milk. How does it go? Wine and milkshakes, hurricanes and traffic raves. Okay, Eva, actually just put the real song in.

No, just put us singing it really loudly. Crazy happy days, wish we weren't so far away friendship like fine wine gets better over time you're better than wine by that i mean sometimes because nothing's really better than wine 22 cats we released in the wild now there's 22 times that amount maybe 22 kids who got cat scratch fever almost 22 years by now We'd eat 22 pints Of ice cream between us And it would only take 22 days And I've got 2200 reasons to thank you

For being a mother so great. Wine and milkshakes, hurricanes and traffic rays. Crazy happy days, wish we weren't so far away. Friendship like fine wine,'s better over time. You're better than wine. By that I mean sometimes. Cause nothing's really better than wine. Raising two kids and working till evening.

While earning her Ph.D. Blasting pink on repeat on road trips. She does nothing haphazardly. She's a mighty kama. She kicked cancer's eyes. She fends off robbers with bruises. No one on earth could ever be as crazy and loving as you. Wild and milkshakes Hurricanes and traffic rays Crazy happy days

Wished we weren't so far away Friendship like fine wine Gets better over time You're better than wine By that I mean sometimes Cause nothing's really better than wine but sometimes moms are better

than wine Then why?