And That's Why We Drink - E72 A Bonanza of Coal and the Wrong Way to Impress a Girl

Episode Date: June 17, 2018

Good evening ladies, gentlemen, and everyone in between! Welcome to episode 72, in which we grace your ears at the world-famous Irvine Improv, AKA Em’s birthday episode! Em covers the Black Star Canyon, the home of one of our audience members. Meanwhile, Christine googled Orange County murders and discovered the case of Daniel Wozniak, a dramatic dude with a great mustache who committed a terrible, terrible crime. Please consider supporting the companies that support us! Hello Fresh -Hello Fresh - Use promo code DRINK30 for $30 off your first week of Hello Fresh! Simple Contacts -Check out Simple Contacts and get $30 off by going to simplecontacts.com/DRINK or just enter code DRINK at checkout. Liquid IV - Go to Liquid-IV.com and enter promo code DRINK for 20% off anything you order on Liquid IV’s website! Third Love - Go to ThirdLove.com/Drink to get 15% off your first purchase! Canvas People - Text WWD to 484848 for to get your own 11x14 Canvas People print for FREE.

Hello. Hello. How are you doing? I'm good. We're all in for a treat today. Yeah. Maybe enjoy. Maybe. No, you're gonna like it. You're gonna like it. It's really fun. I did want to add before we get going. We had some really fun sponsors today that you're going to hear about. And also I wanted to add that this week. So this comes out on Sundayay this past thursday i was actually on an episode um of the podcast is this adulting yeah i've had too much wine i feel like i'm the podcast is called is this adulting is this adulting question mark um with steven and chris and i recorded this this past week and i had so much fun i don't think I've I've had I had so much freaking fun and I know I've probably only done a recording with them and with wine and crime but never have I had so much fun than recording with these two podcasts and they come up with games and they come up with like fun like debates and I had to debate like the um value of donuts over cookies and like I felt like I was on top of it.

Well, I am excited that you had fun because on Monday I will be recording with them. So I will be on the next episode after Christine. So it's going to be so good. It's called, is this adulting? And they've had some great people on there.

They've had Hannah Hart on there. They've had Amanda from wine and crime on there. They've been all the wine and crime people. So, I mean, if you like us and you like wine and crime, if you like Hannah Hart, I mean, go listen to us as adulting. In my episode, we got pretty real. Like, at first, it was really fun because we did some fun, like, jokes and games and, like, went kind of like this or that and, like, debating and joking around.

And then she got kind of real. like debating and and joking around and and then she got kind of real and i talked we talked a lot about like you know i mean we had to put a content warning on like suicide and like depression and all that good stuff um but it was a it was like a really real deep dive and you know the kind of thing that we don't totally do on this podcast because that's not what we're here for so um it's kind of fun to talk about that kind of thing in like a safe space like that podcast. So if you guys want to check that out, I'll be on that this week and then Em will be on next week. So it'll be kind of cool to hear us back to back. I can't wait to hear Em's episodes.

Also, if you are listening to this Sunday when it comes out, then hopefully we are going to see you tonight at our live show at Hollywood Improv. Happy Father's Day to the dads out there or the father figures out there. Or anyone who feels like they're a parent figure. Yeah. Happy Parents Day. And also, we want to add that we have, like, behind the scenes a lot of shit is going on. We're getting a lot of shows ready for y'all and

we have some announcements that are coming that I'm not technically allowed to make yet, but I really, really... Just be ready for things. Really want to make them, but they're coming. So don't be mad, but they're coming. So get your tickets ready. I mean, get your mouse. Get your money ready for tickets.

Listen, save up some gold bars because you're going to have to buy some tickets. Okay. Okay, okay, okay. And happy listening. Okay, bye, bye, bye, bye. Bye. Bye, bye-bye.

Good evening, ladies and gentlemen, and everyone in between. Welcome to the world famous improv! Are we ready to have a great time tonight? I wasn't that, but I think we can do better than that. Are you guys ready to have a great time tonight or what? And now everybody, coming to the stage, let's make it nice and loud for Ed Schultz, Christine Schieffer, and That's Why We Drink podcast guys, make it a little noise! Wow! Thank you.

He's going to fly down. Fake Gio has seen better days. Yes. I tried to brush him out with my hairbrush, and I was like, that's not working. Thank you guys for coming to my birthday show. In a really Christine act, I forgot my notes right as we were coming on stage,

so I ran back, but I didn't leave my wine behind, so my jeans are covered in red wine. So thankfully, there's a table. All of a sudden, I heard that music come on. I was like, is that how we're going out there? And then I walked up, and I looked behind me, and Christine wasn't there. She's like, I forgot my notes. You go. And I was like, what?

I left you a trail of wine to follow me, so it's fine. All right. Oh, man. There's a lot of y'all here. This is our biggest show yet. Banana, as I like to say. Oh, we have... Oh, you have a laser pointer.

Well, that's not what I'm grabbing. Eva just came back from Morocco, and she gave us best friend locket made out of rocks. Like, call it a rocket locket. Geo. Trademark. Wait, that's wrong. There it is.

Shout out to Eva. Thanks, Eva. Eva is here today. We decided last minute we were going to show everyone. There are good luck. Also, I'm sorry if I have black teeth. we were going to show everyone. There are good luck.

Also, I'm sorry if I have black teeth. Eva and Christine decided to do something very nice for me where they got me a birthday ice cream cake that looks like a haunted house, which means a lot of the frosting was black. And so I didn't know, and then someone from the back was like, and I was like, is that how Emma's supposed to look? I was like, anyway, sorry about that if that's the case.

Oh, there's the laser pointer. Here it is. Okay. Why do you drink? Listen, I prepared this whole damn song. I don't want to say anything more. It's your turn. Okay.

Well, I guess we're just... Why do you take propranolol? Well, now I'm 26, which means... Because now I'm off my mom's health insurance. Oh, right. That's right. Yeah, I drink for that too. Now I'm really in danger.

So that's why I drink. Because I'm living every day like it's my last now. Things are going to get real weird up here. So we have a drinking game for you guys. Duh. I don't know if you guys feel like getting hammered, but you're going to. Too bad.

So rules are basic. If you hear any of Christine's catchphrases, you're going to get drunk. If she gasps, if I clear my throat, which I did not. That's going to happen. Listen, beep boop bop, shush shush shush. Any reference to sweating profusely, because I did not. That's gonna happen. Listen, Beep Boop Bop, share, share, share, share, share, share. Any reference to sweating profusely

because we already are. At the Hollywood show, I was like that's not gonna happen in the two minutes in. I was like, God, I'm sweating so much. Drink twice for hello. Thank you. I made you just write it. I was like, they don't even know who we are. They're at the wrong show.

English isn't my first language. The clown gets mentioned. Fingers crossed he doesn't. And anytime we tell Eva what to do. Eva's here, too, by the way, guys. Eva, that's him. That's it, right? It's pretty easy.

Yeah, if you want to crack into it. So, like, anytime we do anything, just start drinking. Crack into it? Is that what you said? Yeah, let's do it. All right. I have a good ghost story for you guys today. And it's got a whole lot of stuff.

It's not just ghosts. It's also, like, aliens and, I mean, it's like a potluck. So we're just going to dive right in. And I did the Google mapping just so anyone who wants to travel can go there. But wait till after the show. Yeah, don't leave right now. We can't handle that. It's 19 miles away and 32 minutes from this room.

And it's known as the darkest place in the OC. And it's called as the darkest place in the OC. Oh. Ooh. And it's called the... You ready? I wasn't ready for that. Hang on. Ready? Boom. Black Star King.

I don't know what that is. Someone lives there! Oh, well, you can confirm all of this. So now you know that he lives 19 miles from this room. Party at his house after this. Okay. Does anyone know about this place? I've never heard of it. I had never heard

about it before. Me neither. So this was quite an eye-opener. I was like, whoa! So, alright. So it starts in the Santa Ana Mountains. Also, if I'm wrong, don't tell me that, because I'll be so humiliated. You can't Google it right now. I tried really hard to be right, so let's all pretend I did my best.

It's Em's birthday, okay? Alright, it's in the Santa Ana Mountains. It was the prior home to the Shoshone tribe. We know about them. Yes, we do. It is now the main source in the country for Shoshone artifacts. In case you want to, like, pick one up. According to both historians and psychics,

more blood has been spilled there than any other part of the mountains. Hold on. Sorry. Historians and psychics. Yeah,ics yeah so like depending on who you believe like there's like why do you need to add this like if historians say it i'm gonna believe it we don't need to like well i like to think the psychics and the historians weren't near each other when they both made the decisions all right okay so we're just giving the psychics credit okay got it yeah all right sure all right so also i'm interested in like it's more blood than anywhere else. Like there's blood all over that place apparently.

Oh, good. So in the 1800s, the Shoshone fought the Spanish, the Angelenos. You know about them. Ha. Ha. Oh, do I? They were trying to come onto their land And so they Did not like each other So

That's what the historians and the psychics All said That was funny So So this Oh who's that strapping young man I almost said this strapping young man It's those rocket locket rocks.

I know. So this guy, his name is William Wolfskill. And people seem to know about him up here. And he what? We're going to skip right over that. In 1831, there was something on the Black Star Canyon Indian Massacre. That's a bad taste in everyone's mouth. So William Wolfskill, he's not a great guy.

I take that back then. He's not very handsome after all. He's an American fur trapper, and he wanted to, I guess, get in the good graces of the Angelenos living here. And so he decided that he was going to go find the Shoshone that were stealing their horses.

There's also no proof that they were actually stealing horses. I think they just said they wanted an excuse. They wanted an excuse to go hurt innocent people. Innocent people. Sorry. Speak people, sorry. Speak of it. I'm slurring.

I'm not even drinking. That's your first problem. So anyway, so to make them like him, he offered that he would go track down the tribe and bring horses back. And he built a group of fur trappers to go with him. And they got to the Shoshone camp called Hidden Ranch, which still exists. And they decided they were going to surprise attack the tribe. Oh no. And yeah, this is the most silent you guys are being right now, and it's really psyching

me out. You're really bumming everyone out, huh? It gets, it gets okay. I feel like that's the best you can hope for with this show. It's like fine eventually. So he built a group of trappers to go with him, and so this group decided to surprise attack them, and most of the Shoshone died

because all the fur trappers had guns, and they had bows and arrows, so it was just not even a fair fight. And the Shoshone, right before they died, all swore vengeance and cursed the land, so that's the start of the hauntings.

Fun fact. That should be a drink one. I'm also just trying to perk you up. It's like way too quick. Fun fact. The hidden ranch site is now historical landmark number 217. Okay so anyway. That was really fun. Thank you. Um, okay. So anyway. That was really fun. Thank you. Some people like landmarks. I don't know.

Okay. Oh, here we go. Who knows about And That's Why We Draw? That was not everyone. You've got to explain it now. So In That's Why We Draw, right before we do a live show, we send out,

but not a lot of time. We do it within like 24 hours. You have three hours to do this. We send out different phrases of things that are going to show up in our stories and you guys can draw them and submit them and then whichever one we think is the funniest or the most creative, we put it on the show.

Where do we find it? On our Instagram. Instagram, I think. This is our second show ever, so sorry. We're still a working process. We're workshopping it, but I think Instagram is the way to go. Thank you. That's the smart way to say it.

So the first thing that I requested people draw and send to me was citrus science. Wait, are you... I'm going to let go and trust the process. Well, now I don't know what the process is. Aren't you supposed to explain it and then

show the photo or do you show the photo and then explain it? I'm going to show... The people want to see the picture. All right. Give the people what they want. All right.

This is... So this is citrus science. Okay. Oh my God. Somebody made that? Somebody made like a lemon burning its own face off. You guys have issues. Someone thought that and then took time to make it.

A lot of time, by the looks of it. Okay, so the reason citrus science was a phrase coming up is because not only was William Wolfskill a horrible person, but he also decided he was going to start planting orange, lemon, and lime trees, and he ended up winning an award for the largest citrus orchard in the U.S. And he also got involved in citrus science, which is crossbreeding citruses. So that is a real thing.

Yeah. Oh, got it. So he was crossbreeding different types, and he actually developed the Valencia orange. Oh, I love those. Which is most commonly used in orange juice. Oh. I literally typed in orange juice and every picture was a girl giving a thumbs up.

I was like, I don't know which one to pick. Vitamin C. There's no pregnant ladies in this one, though. Yeah, the pregnant ladies like to go for the wine. Can you blame them? Also, he began growing grapes in the 1840s, and his vineyard was awarded the best in California.

So you might have liked him for one reason, Christine. Just going to let that one go. Also, he currently has a bar. Not him. He's dead. Uh-oh. There's a bar named after him only a half hour from here called W. Wolf's dead. There's a bar named after him, only like a half hour from here, called W. Wolfskill.

Just in case anyone went to... I just thought people might want to know about that. I don't know. They're my notes, guys. Alright, here's another one for you. A bonanza of coal. I don't know what to do with that. Alright. Well,'t know what to do with that. All right.

Well, this is my favorite of them all. What a bonanza. People, I don't think really anyone knows what the word bonanza means, because I got a lot of weird rhymes. I think this person does, though. That's a bonanza if I ever saw one. So in the 1870s, there was a mining strike in the mountains, leaving, in the newspapers, quote, a perfect bonanza of coal. Wow! Yeah.

Learning things. Man, this game is really easy for you to come up with terms. I kind of had to force mine, I think. Yeah, that's hard when your story's about murder. Yeah, it's a lot less funny. So businessmen took advantage of the fact that there was all this coal that no one was using, and they created the Black Star Coal Mining Company, which is where the canyon gets its name from. And it was profitable for several decades, but by the early 1900s,

other mining companies had beat them out, so then they went out of business. Oh, sad. I'm just trying to give you guys the hits. I feel like I needed to react and I didn't know how, so. I gave a kind of... Look at this strapping. Now I'm scared to call anyone strapping. Good call, because he's not nice.

So, in 1899, the hidden ranch at this point is now owned by a rancher named Henry Hungerford. Wow. Wow, though. what a name. What a name. Wow. His cattle driver, James, owed him $17, which back then was 500 bucks. And he wouldn't pay it. He said he was willing to pay up to like five bucks.

So it doesn't really sound like a great idea either. Oh, five out of 17, not out of the five. Five out of 17. Oh, I was like, oh, good one. So the next day, they were fighting, and they cooled off, and they went back and fought for the next day. As you do. And they met at Henry's brother's house, so it's Henry and his brother, and then James, who owes the money.

And they, oh. I'm just repositioning my wine. Oh, I saw you do... I thought you were making fun of me doing, like... Ha ha! So, anyway, they go to Henry's house. They end up getting in an even bigger fight, and they end up killing James.

What? Over... R.I.P., James. Over $17. So... Well, that's not very nice. That's an anger issue. That's all. That's all?

Yeah, that's all. Yeah. Anyway. So on his deathbed, James ended up saying that both... He made a... What do you call it? A dying... yeah, declaration. Yep, that's the one. He

said that both of them shot him and they ended up using that information in the court case about whether or not they should sentence them to jail. And the court case took five months but James was already dead by that point and the Hungerford's got away scot-free

oh no drink drink I don't even notice it anymore so over the over the next hundred years this is where all the ghost stuff comes in I know that's what you came for

and how is like announces that well because I'm sure people are like, oh my god, this is not history class. It's very much not history class. I just want people to know what I'm talking about. I just need to prove that I tried to learn about this place. Thank you. It's my birthday, that's why

everyone did that. Yeah, did you guys know that? So, over the next hundred years, the Hidden Ranch property has seen several freak accidents. Deaths, car accidents, hiking injuries, wildfires, and multiple helicopter crashes. And all of the, not all of them, but several of the car accidents and motorcycle accidents are just total freak incidents where they didn't collide into anything, but their bike looks like it crashed into something or the car looks like it hit something that wasn't there. Ooh. Ooh. Also, apparently it drives people insane if you stay there too long. Oh, can you confirm that, guy who lives there?

I mean, if he's insane, then you confirm that, guy who lives there? I mean, if he's insane, then we know that that is a true fact. In 1939, two businessmen who regularly hiked out there, they ended up making a suicide pact while they were there, drank rat poison whiskey,

and then ran a garden hose from their exhaust into the car. What? But they died holding hands. That's not funny! and then ran a garden hose from their exhaust into the car. What? What? But they died holding hands. That's not funny. That's cute. It's not cute.

Oh, that's not cute either. It's just really fucked up. I mean, yeah, it's fucked up, but that's what the show is called, and that's why we drink. The coroner also wrote in the notes, friends to the death. Wait, the coroner wrote that? The coroner wrote that because the notes, friends to the death. Wait, the coroner wrote that? The coroner wrote that because they were found holding hands. Yeah, it's like, we sure they were just friends, because it seems like maybe something else was happening. I didn't want to assume sometimes grown men hold hands.

That's true. I don't want to... I mean, my thought is if you're having a suicide pact and dying, maybe you need to hold hands, you know? I think all of a sudden it's not gay. It's like... Yeah. No homo till death. Fair point.

Fair point. So I didn't want to assume, but I thought the same thing. I was like, they're holding hands. You just wanted us to assume it. I wanted you guys to agree with my thought. I was like, there are grown men in the 30s holding hands. I don't know. Friends to death.

So in the 1950s through the 1990s there have been several reports of UFOs over the canyons as well as cryptids. I know you get the whole package. I love a good cryptid. A lot of people say that Bigfoot is out there. There's been a lot of sightings of Bigfoot.

But they have decided that if something's out there, it's not actually Bigfoot. It is Santiago Sam. What is that? Apparently he's half Sasquatch, half eel? Eel? Like something like

grew out of the water and then made it with Sasquatch. That's not how that works. That makes Sasquatch sound so much more believable, because that's more unlikely. What in God's name is that? So that's a real picture? Is it? Well, Google says so. Okay, I'm gonna Google says so

This thing has been seen 18 times Oh shit 17 by one professor Wait, are you serious? Oh, you try to slide that in there Like you wouldn't know I'm reporting the news, I don't make it

I'm sorry, so two people ever have reported it So two people have seen this thing And I think the other one was his friend for life, or friend till death, or whatever. Oh my. Anyway, he may or may not exist. Guy who lives there, report back. Let us know. Supposedly, he lives in the Santa Ana Mountains.

He is 5'2", making him the shortest Bigfoot on record. How many are on record? What? And he has 20 inch feet. How do they know this? How is he this small with these big old flounders? Flounder? Flip-flop.

No, just move on. Who cares? It's your birthday. You can call it whatever you want. Well, they also say, they, the two people, say that the way that he's standing, he evolved to have a shorter stature so he wouldn't look like Bigfoot so he could hide in the brush easier. Hold on. That's awesome.

That works. You know, one day I'm going to do a whole episode on Bigfoot and you guys have to take me seriously. Wait, so they're saying that natural selection made this one creature not as tall as Bigfoot so that people wouldn't think it was Bigfoot. I get it. I just want to make sure I understand. You know, I'm not bigfoot. I just want to make sure I understand. You know, I'm not questioning it. I just want to make sure I get it.

Alright, just keep talking. Look, between that and the psychic saying this place is a bloodbath, I don't really know what's going on. So in the 1970s, let's just skip past that whole thing. Just move on. In the 1970ss the Hidden Ranch property was a power plant and is now owned by the Wildlands Conservancy

I almost said conservatory and I knew I was wrong and there's also a private neighborhood that lives up there I'm sure there's many private neighborhoods however there's one specifically that's going to be in a story that I tell you guys I bet that guy lives there if you're that person, run.

So, all right. Just some pictures. I'll enjoy this. Just some pictures. Also, the thing in the top left was not there when the picture was taken. What do you mean? Wait, wait, wait. You see that person?

It's like a person. The black figure? Yeah, the black figure. Wait. You got it. Okay, hold on. All right, don figure. Wait. You got it. Okay, hold on. All right, don't hold on. Just keep talking.

Okay. I don't know. Okay. Anyway. So in the 1970s, here's another sad thing where we're all going to feel really awkward. Oh, good. No, I'm just saying. It's going to get quiet because no one's going to know how to react.

So there was a school bus that crashed. No. In the area. It regularly went through the area to drive kids back home. And the bus lost control and different stories say it either went over

a cliff or crashed. I think what happened is it went over a cliff and into a lower part of the canyon. It still is in the canyon. It's still there? Yeah. They've seen it. That's bananas.

That's bananas. So, the bus lost control, went over a cliff, or stayed where it is, and people cannot see it. And, ha ha ha, but the driver, the teacher, and all the children died. Most of the children, most of the children that's the silver lining

so okay la la la skip past that in the 1970s to the 1980s this was a very regular place for satanic meetings and ritual sacrifices so you get that too in this story you really are hitting every base here so apparently people also still see some rituals happening there, but it's not as often as back then.

Well, that's good. Maybe gifts? Oh yeah, some are still found late in the canyons chanting. That's great. Oh, okay. So throughout the years, many hikers have actually gone missing and never came back from this canyon. And during Halloween, they have ghost campouts and haunted hikes. So we'll be there come Halloween.

See you in a few months. And there's also a homeless man named Black Star Bill. And I can tell, I already like this guy. What a strapping young lad. Well, apparently, different stories told me that he's either a real person or a ghost or people can't, they don't know what they just saw, but apparently

he's a homeless man who chases you with a rifle and tries to shoot you off the property. So, like, hoping he's a ghost, but I don't think a ghost uses a gun so effectively. All right, so ghost stories? Yeah, you want some? Bring it on.

Drink. Sorry. So, what? Someone's dying over there. Stop yelling at our audience. So, okay. One of the first things that they say

is the wind apparently in the canyon is very different, where it blows really crazy and sounds like men screaming. What? But a split second later, it'll be so silent that you can hear a pin drop, and the wind is hot. Ew!

Which is like breath or something. Yeah. It sounds like a sewer. Yeah. You know. So there's also the general feeling of sadness and darkness around you. You can feel people grabbing on your arms to pull you into the

canyon deeper. Yeah. Oh yeah. There's screams and shadows of children running from where the bus crashed and you can hear their shoes on the ground. I don't like that.

Yeah. No. Also, people regularly find remains of black magic rituals, including pentagrams and sacrificed animals. Oh, good. And flashlights, like their bulbs, will spontaneously burst, even if it's a brand new flashlight. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. You've seen some shit. So they will spontaneously flash, but also they flash on your phone.

Apparently they know what a phone is and can fuck around with it. And they will make your flash go on and off nonstop. Well, that's really nice. It's like a strobe effect. Yeah, I think it's pretty harmless. Yeah, but also it's creepy that they know how phones work. Because they're recent ghosts, you know? Like, they're new ghosts.

When we all stop haunting people, we're going to be like, messing around with phones, I'd imagine. You're going to Snapchat everyone. So there's a shadow man known as The Miner. Oh no, Uh-uh. And he causes heavy breathing in your ear, strange smells, freezing cold, and or sweating, like, from heat. Like, I can be, we can be in the same room, and you'll be, like, dying of heat, and I'll be freezing cold, and then it'll switch if we mention it. What? That's the crazy part.

Like, he, like, messes with you. Uh-uh. So if you say, oh, it's cold, then all of a sudden it's really hot. What a jerk. When challenged to show themselves, this happened during one of the Halloween investigations, they were taunting them and saying, show yourself, show yourself. And a boulder fell from a higher part of the canyon and rolled towards the crew. Oh.

And then you could hear people laughing, like, that were not there. Oh, no. Did anybody die? No, they saw it early enough, and they were like, oh, we gotta go. But, I mean, it was coming for us. Oh, no.

And now that's apparently part of the tour, where they're like, and that's where the boulder came after us. That is historic. Place number 219. So also there are a lot, if you try to have a yes or no conversation with them, there's tree knocking, which apparently that's a Bigfoot thing. What?

Because ghosts use EMF detectors or something that can give a yes or no response but Bigfoot uses tree knocking. I don't know who created the science. But what does this like weird fish eel thing do? Is that the same thing? I don't know. That's a good question. Listen, I'm just trying to follow the really

People also say when they hear the tree knocking They will hear something like the sound of a gorilla Which like I mean kind of Bigfoot And They get reports of feeling like they're in an ice bath And they will see shadow people Dart around the tree that they're standing next to

It's like it'll like Come at ya Watch out dart around the tree that they're standing next to. It's like, you know, like, come at you. Watch out. Watch out. Okay, here's another sad one. So a woman... God damn it. So a woman murdered her children. Oh my

God! And then committed suicide. We're just gonna dive right in. And she can still be seen wearing a white gown with blood on it and she basically the scene that people have most commonly reported is it's like the last couple seconds of her life.

So like her right after she killed her kids and she's about to do the other thing. And so a lot of people will see like a frantic mother looking for her kids as if she like came out of a... Trance? Yeah, something like that.

So a lot of times they'll get EVPs of a woman saying, where are my children? Which is way sad. That is really sad. Also, there are EVPs that say, do you want us to leave? And it says sometimes, which is super passive. It's like, I mean, I'm fine. I'm not saying I don't want you to leave. I'm saying you can stay if you want, but I'm not going to say anything.

Wow. That isn't me as a ghost. I mean, there you go. There are reported phantoms of Spanish conquistadors. That's fun. And you can hear horses galloping and shouting in Spanish at the horses. So there's that. Mom knows.

I don't know. Sorry, I regret it. I take it back. What were you trying to say? I was trying to think of something in Spanish, and that's all that came out. Yeah, I wouldn't do that. Okay.

I said I regret it. God. There are a lot of UFOs in the skies before sunrise, and only when those fly over are when the freak accidents seem to happen. Reports at the site of the bus are that there are sounds of moaning and the kids gasping for air at the witching hour, and if you try to leave, something will pull you back and the headlights will turn on by themselves.

The headlights of the bus? The headlights of a bus? Of a bus that hasn't been going on since the 90s and the lights aren't there anymore. They're kicked out and something will still glow. That was pretty. How was that? I just heard laughing and I was like,

did I say something funny? I did. Here's the creepy part. Here's another creepy part about... Okay, so the one at the top left. So there's apparently haunted farm equipment. And in them, you can hear whispers and snickers from the inside. And it will try to taunt you in there. And then if you don't fall for it,

it will be like a voice of one of your friends saying I'm stuck help me that is wild drink sorry I just had to go for it with that one I couldn't stop myself

oh here we go the worst way to impress a girl I'm excited for this there's many and I've done most of them. Good one. All right, so this was the winner. Kill her brother. My brother. It just seems so dark.

He's a crazy guy with the heart eyes. Oh, yeah, he does have heart eyes. Yeah. He did it out of passion. Murderous heart eyes. This is very weirdly specific. You know what, Allison picked this one, so if you don't like it, that is not my fault. No, I love it. Okay, so the reason that this got picked is because when I first started looking up Black Star Canyon, one of the first Reddit pages about it was, we are 10 year, or we are, not 10 year olds, Jesus. We are 10 teenagers and we are trying to impress girls. What's the bravest thing we can do in our area? That's hilarious, by the way.

Well, well, no, they're so stupid. So, okay. These are like all over there, apparently. Yeah? Okay, so everywhere it's just telling you to get out. Oh, it says go back, not work. Also, there's signs everywhere, apparently, with like bullet holes. Like things just get shot. Is that guy Bill?

Oh, yeah. I don't know. I'm serious. It's Black Star Bill, actually. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. So, here are two stories that I have for you. One is, one of them is from Reddit. Thought I'd tell you.

A 10-year-old on Reddit. One's from Reddit and another one's from like another site. I was trying to give them credit so it didn't look like I made this up. Okay. Whoops. So the first one is about one of the satanic rituals and they witnessed one by accident. Oh no.

Yeah, by accident. Not on purpose. Not like, I want to go. I mean, I wouldn't put it past. Me? Me. I'd be like, Christine, we got to get out of here. Okay.

So she was looking around at night, like hiking at night. Already a bad decision. And she walked by an old shack and saw an empty pool, and she thought originally it was covered in trash. A pool? A pool. Okay. Like a, I'm sure like a, not a fan's pool. What is this? A pool. Okay. Like a, I'm sure like a not a fan's pool.

What is this? Like digging. Oh. That's like, you and I have different understandings of it. You make a big enough hole in the ground, it becomes a pool. It's just like, maybe it's just... Santa Ana above ground. Santa Ana above ground pool. There we go. Costco brand. Thank you.

Kirkland. Kirkland brand pool. Got it. Okay, thank you. I really needed that. So there's a pool. Alright. That's aboveland. Kirkland brand pool. Got it. Okay, thank you. I really needed that. So there's a pool. All right. That's above ground. I'm ready now.

Because it's Santa Ana. We didn't say it. You can't be mad. So in this pool, there was a... There was trash, right? Supposedly trash. Okay. But it was kind of broken so you could look into it.

Okay. You know what I mean? Oh oh so that would make sense it is above ground okay got it so it's cracked yeah it was like so you could look into it if you want to following and sometimes you just learn things on the spot. So she was walking by a shack with her friend, who, poor guy, probably wouldn't get out of there, saw the empty pool, looked in, thought they saw trash, but they looked harder, and it was actually a set of ropes at each corner, tied off at each corner, candles, and a pentagram. Oh.

And in the shack, obviously she looked in the shack after that, she found a pentagram on the floor, candles at each point, a skull, dead rabbits on a laundry line. A skull? Human or animal? Who knows? Animal.

It was a ram. What? Dead rabbits on a laundry line, a chalice, a knife, and a cut open animal. She heard people approaching the house, and so she hid. And she hid in a way where she could look into the pool. Or she's like hiding behind the pool. Anyway, they got in the pool. And then she was like, oh, shit.

And so she had to look. You should write a book. Too bad. She'd be like, no. No, no, a book. Too bad, she'd be like, mm, no. No, no, hold on, but actually she was, I was like, oh, but this, that definitely happened though. So she heard people approaching, she hid behind the pool,

and 10 people in hooded robes went down into the pool, or not, I wrote down, I know it didn't say down, it's in a background pool. Went into the pool. Jesus wrote down. I know it didn't say down. It's an above ground pool. Went into the pool. Jesus, what is wrong with me? No problem. They had a large bag with them,

lit candles, and then pulled a goat out of the bag. Wait, no. And they performed a sacrifice. Wait, it was a lot. Okay, I don't like that. There's more description to that, but if you don't want me to get into that. It happened.

They killed a goat, is what you're saying. Yep, that's really nice. While chanting something, and then they passed the cup around. Ah! Oh, that's a new noise. I was like, where did that come from? And I realized it was from my mouth.

It came from you. I'm so sorry for everyone. Yeah, I mean, adding that to the thing. Anyway, the cup may or may not have potential goat blood in it. Oh, what is wrong with people? Then they pass it around, and then may or may not have sipped it.

So then obviously, pool girl is like, we gotta get out of here. So, obviously. She and her friend ran off, but they classic us tripped. And they heard. Oh, we did not say that this is what we did last week. Actually, this is my actual, this is my Yelp review. Black Star Canyon.

So, but like the sound, they heard someone there. And so you could hear them muttering like who is that and so they took off got to their car here's the creepy part though her friend was behind her like she left him was like bye but so she heard who was that like who

made that sound and the guy that her friend that was behind her heard them say, oh, probably that couple. And then he thought he had just heard that because he was afraid, but then they got to their car and there was a note on their dashboard that said, please go away, don't come back. At least they were polite. Please go away. Here's the last story, which is quite a doozy. Oh boy.

Because I forgot to mention that there's also a demon in this canyon. Known as the Demon of Black Star. And he haunts one of the private neighborhoods on Hidden Ranch on Black Star Canyon Road. I don't know if you want to go there and find out for yourself. So this is the Reddit one. I just want to give credit because I don't want anyone you want to go there find out for yourself so this is the Reddit one I just want to give credit because I don't want anyone to think I stole this Gallum Triumph wrote this

a couple years ago strapping young lad if I ever saw one so Gallum I don't want to get sued I don't need to know but we're going to get sued by a Reddit user I'm just trying to cover for that. That sounded really mean.

I didn't mean it like that. I use Reddit. All right. Eva, come right out. Eva, delete it. Here's the thing. Here's the thing. This is why I edit this show.

Yeah, we can't be trusted. I'm on my best behavior right now. Yeah, we're really trying so hard. So Gallant Triumph. Got it. He says, when he was 14, he had a sleepover with his friend Daniel, who lived in the private neighborhood. He was sleeping over at his friend's house to babysit his friend's five-year-old brother, Alex. So, the two friends were babysitting.

Sure. The house had a new intercom system just put in, but the house itself was really old, and once they assumed the parents had left, they were playing PlayStation, and the intercom said, okay, see you tonight. Okay, see you tonight. What the hell? And so they looked at each other, thinking, didn't the parents already leave, and looked out the window, and their car was already halfway down the road. parents already leave, and looked out the window, and their car was already halfway down the road. Later, the intercoms started popping and static buzzing, and a woman's voice comes on saying,

We love you, Alex. We all do. What? Because at first I was like, oh, it's probably interference, like radio signal, but that's creepy. And then Alex, and so they heard something talking to the little brother. And you could hear the little brother on the intercom in another room go, who are you? Are you back home, mom? Oh, what?

And then a snicker. Yucky. So later, he didn't seem really faced by it, but the guy that wrote this and Daniel were like, okay, do you know who that was? Because the five-year-old would know. Oh, they asked the five-year-old? They asked the five-year-old, like, who was that? Even though he said, who are you? Maybe he got an answer.

Well, they did get an answer because Alex said it was probably the cold people. They come in at night when it's warm. So then when the pizza guy showed up that night. Oh, no. This is becoming so strange. After the pizza guy left, the little brother couldn't stop laughing and he was like crying, laughing so hard. And he refused to tell anyone why. couldn't stop laughing, and he was like crying,

laughing so hard, and he refused to tell anyone why. And he kept laughing, and whenever he got a breath in, would go, I know, I know, to himself. And so, Daniel and his friend said, what the hell are you talking about? What is wrong with you? And in between laughter, he said, pizza boy gonna die, pizza boy

gonna die. What? I know, I know. Oh. So, they know, I know. Oh. So they put him to bed. I was like, put him in the backyard. Put him away.

They went on to the balcony in Daniel's room and while they were out on the balcony, they heard a terrible scream outside

that echoed throughout the canyon and it sounded like a woman dying. And then Daniel was like, oh, it just happens. So they just let that happen without doing anything. And the friend that was staying there, he kept saying that he couldn't stop looking back into the room through the balcony at the closet in Daniel's room. Oh, no.

And he kept getting the sense that something was in the closet staring at him. And he ended up being in, like, a trance for, like, 10 or 15 minutes just wondering what is in that closet. So eventually he couldn't handle it anymore, and he ran back inside and swung the door open, and it was a walk-in closet, and there was nothing in there except a stuffed animal dolphin sitting by itself on the ground. I'm sorry.

It's funny. So then the brother said, that's weird. That's Alex's. Oh, he sleeps with that. No, it's not funny. It works. So it should be in bed with him. So Alex said, oh, I'll go bring it to him. Like an idiot. So you know how idiots are

so Alex grabbed the dolphin Alex was a child I thought oh yeah Alex was an idiot the friend is an idiot I'm paying attention um I'm not so so okay

so the dolphin was Alex's and the friend there it is so then So, okay, so the dolphin was Alex's, the five girls. Sure, sure, sure. And the friend, oh, there it is. So then the friend decided he was going to bring it to Alex's room. And on the way to the room, he got increasingly dizzier as he got to the door. And when he got in there, Alex was already awake and sitting on his bed upright. Horror movie.

And Alex said, where's my water? And he said, I don't know. Do you want some? Which is what I'd be like, I don't fucking know. He said, do you want some water? It's weird that you just think I'd want to get you some. And Alex said, well, I asked mom for some,

but she just stared at me and walked out. No! No! No! And the friend knew that the mom wasn't home yet, so was like, what are you talking about? And he said, I woke up, and she was just standing at the doorway looking at me. I asked her for water, and she turned around and left. I thought she went into Daniel's room because I saw her holding my toy. Ew.

So they had him sleep in the room with them. No, I would put him so far away. I don't know why they're like, let's bring him closer to us. So he slept in the room with them in a sleeping bag, and... What? Yeah, just get rid of him. Put him in the recycling bin. You live in a canyon.

Just lose them. So they had him in the room, and everyone fell asleep. And around 1 o'clock in the morning, the friend woke up to the sound of whispering in the room. And he couldn't see what was going on, so he just kind of opened his eyes without moving and saw that Alex was talking to the intercom. And a voice was whispering from the intercom, but he couldn't hear what it said. But Alex pressed the button and said, I can't, they don't want me to go downstairs. So then the friend looks at Daniel and was like, dude.

So they both woke up and was like, what are you doing? And Alex said, she wants me to let her in, Dan. She says she's freezing. The cold people. I don't like this. So Daniel grabbed Alex, pressed the button, and said, who the fuck are you? And then there was hissing and popping, and it sounded like the machine was breaking. And then there was hissing and popping, and it sounded like the machine was breaking. And then nothing.

So they asked Daniel, or the friend then asked Daniel if there was an outside intercom and someone was just messing with the kid. And he said, no, there's two downstairs and four upstairs, so whoever is using it is already inside the house. They're inside the house! They tried calling the parents, but obviously they didn didn't answer so they went back to sleep I'm sorry all of these people are psycho this is really but then a fun twist is at 3am they woke up to a blood curdling scream

so fun in the room and there was a woman in the room blood curdling screaming but it was the mom sleepwalking no it was not the mom had come back between 1 and 3 and then the mom sleepwalking. No, it was not. The mom had come back between 1 and 3 and then happened to sleepwalk and scream. That's the worst sleepover.

I'd be like, nope, I'm out. Let's auction this for a movie. I feel like we could make this real fun. Anyway. Let's put Jason Bateman in there. We'll just find really good rom-com. Wow.

Well, that's my story. Yeah, did the pizza guy die? No, he left. Oh, I don't know. Emma. That, TPD. I don't know. We'll let you know next time.

On Instagram. All right. Oh, yeah. Find us there. Good job, Emma. Thank you. Happy birthday. Alright. Are you ready for more terrible things?

Okay, here's the thing. Listen, I looked up I looked up Orange County murder. That actually yielded a surprising amount of results. And I was like, oh my god, I could do like 400 shows here. And I found out that... So I did all my notes and then I found out that

My Favorite Murder actually did this at a live show in Anaheim and I was like, oops, but it's too late. So before anyone's like, they copied. I haven't even listened to that episode so it's unintentional and I hope I have my own twist on it. We'll find out when people leave us

mean reviews on iTunes. So this is the story of Daniel Wozniak. Oh! Who did? I suggested this to you in the email! I know him! What's your name? Sit down!

That's not something you tell us! No, no, no! It is! Okay, but now you have to tell us. No, no, no. It is. Okay, but now you have to tell us. I want to pretend like I actually know that. How do you know him? I do music. I do, like, community theater.

Okay. And I know him through, like, people who have done community theater. Oh, no. She knows him through community theater. Was he good? Was he good? Might as well know.

Keep it... He has a beautiful voice, so keep... I want you all to... He's got one thing going for him. He's got... I mean, he's got a pretty nice beard, too, I guess. Also, I don't know this story. A lot of you...

I know, and Evan's just like, what's happening? I just blindly am like, okay, that's what we're going to hear about now. Yeah, so this guy... I had a feeling people would be like, know what this is. And I guess, I mean, I knew it because I got it in an email from her. So she knows him. What happened? I didn't see it. Oh, no. Wait, I fixed it, I fixed it didn't see it. Oh, no. Wait, I fixed it, I fixed it, I fixed it.

Matthew, don't be mad at me. There it is. I was, again, so blind, I was like, what? Listen. And then I was like, oh, boy, oh, boy. I just had the feeling I needed to spice things up a little. Okay, this is the story of Daniel Wozniak. Will everybody just get on board now?

All right. Buckle up. So, Daniel Wozniak was a... Webster's Dictionary defines Daniel... I always feel so weird starting these. Okay, Daniel Wozniak. I'm going to tell you who he is. He was a 26-year-old actor living in...

He's my age. And your age. Oh my God, only for today we're the same age. Yeah, today's the only day we're both 26. I don't know, that's a fun fact for us only. It's a really special day for all of you. And Daniel Wozniak. And him.

Really special. Okay, so anyway, he's a 26-year-old actor living in Costa Mesa, California. Woo! He and his fiancée, Rachel Mae Buffett, a former Disneyland princess. Ooh! I mean, if that were part of my... I don't know. I couldn't find a photo anywhere.

You better believe I looked, though. That's going, like, Cinderella. Okay. Okay. Okay, so they were planning a wedding, and they were going broke because of it, which I can also relate to very personally. And their financial issues actually were so bad that they were being evicted from their apartment. But they had an elaborate beachside wedding and reception planned, and they were not going to let go of it.

And they wanted to go on a cruise for their honeymoon, and so they were like, well, we can't pay for it, but it's happening anyway. Listen, I don't know what to say. So Daniel was like, I know how to fix this. I have a really good idea. And here's what I'm going to do. He has to really plan one week, by the way, before their wedding. So they had it all planned out, but they like hadn't paid yet, obviously, because they didn't have any money. So they were like a week before the wedding, he goes, I know how I'm going to fix this. I am going to murder

my friend and upstairs neighbor, who's a 26 year old army vet named PFCFC Samuel Herr and then I'm going to take his savings out of his bank account and pay for my wedding with it. And she was like, done deal. Do it. Is that what happened? Did she know? I don't know anything about this. Let me just tell you what happened. He comes up with this plan.

Okay. And the reason that he decided to kill Sam was that one time he and Sam were hanging out like they were good friends. And Sam had let it slip that while he was serving in Afghanistan, he had saved up around $60,000. And so then Daniel was like, well, this makes sense. I'm going to murder him and take that $60,000 because I need to pay for my cruise. I mean, I don't know. This makes me very mad.

because I need to pay for my cruise. I mean, I don't know. This makes me very mad. So on May 21, 2010, Daniel Wozniak lured Samuel Herr to a theater at the Joint Forces Training Base in Los Alamitos, saying he needed help moving some boxes. And as Sam picked up one of the boxes, Wozniak shot him in the head and killed him.

And that night, as if everything was, you know, normal and dandy, he went and performed as the lead in the musical Nine alongside his fiancée, Rachel. Jeez, can you imagine being on stage with someone

knowing they killed someone? Here it is. Oh. You can see it with your own two eyes. So that was that night when he was performing with his fiancée.

And nobody suspected it. This own two eyes. So that was that night when he was performing with his fiance. And nobody suspected it. This was the night. Yeah. Oh my god, that poor girl holding his hand. That's so weird. Yeah, pretty fucked up. So I, as I mentioned, had kind of a harder time coming up with quirky phrases

because it was just rough. So I made one of them musical murderer. Oh, there it is. And this is by... This is by our gal Priscilla sent this in. It's Ted Bundy singing Define Gravity alongside what I think is either Em Schultz or John Wayne Gacy.

I'm not really sure. That hurt, that hurt. And I googled this because remember how we don't know what the hell Hamilton is? Well, that's a line from Hamilton. And I read it and I was like, this just makes me feel stupid. It's a song from Hamilton. So, you know, they're musical murderers.

That has actually worked out. I just kind of threw that out there. All right. So the next day, don't look at that yet. Close your eyes. So, oh, man. Oh, okay. So the next day, Oh, man. Oh, okay. So the next day, Daniel returned to the site where he murdered Sam, and this just gets gruesome. He cut off his head, his left hand, and his forearm, then just wandered around and tossed them into the El Dorado park. Because he was like, well, this will help.

I don't know. I really can't understand. Wait, his left hand and his left forearm? Yeah, I think he chopped the left hand off, left hand and his left forearm? Um, yeah. I think he chopped the left hand off and then he chopped the rest of the forearm off. Seems like an extra cut he didn't need. I mean, yeah. A lot of this seems like an extra. Yeah, it all sounds pretty unnecessary. Very extra in like the worst possible way.

Um, so then, you know, at that point he was like, well, I still feel like I haven't really done enough to like fuck things up. So he's like, why don't I feel like I haven't really done enough to, like, fuck things up. So he's like, why don't I make this worse? That's what I do all the time. Yeah, yeah. And so you're thinking, like, how could this get worse?

But, oh, boy, does it. So for whatever reason, he took Sam, her cell phone. He took his wall and his cell phone, actually, after he shot him. Took his cell phone and started texting Sam's college friend, Julie Kabushi, who was actually tutoring him and helping him learn Spanish. And they were like really good college friends. So he texted Julie from Sam's phone. And this is the actual text.

It said, can you come over tonight at midnight alone? Going out for a bit. Very upset. Need to talk. And, of course, she was like a really, she was 23 years old. She was like really sweet and a really good, good friend of his. So she was like, of course I'll come over. What's wrong? And he said, please don't tell anyone, please. You can trust me. And she said, I promise I'm

not going to say anything. I pinky promise. Pinky. So he told Julie to come to Sam's apartment, So he told Julie to come to Sam's apartment, posing as Sam. And when she arrived, he was standing outside, and he said, oh, I got this weird text from Sam saying that I needed to come over. And she's like, so did I. That's crazy. And so they went inside. He's like, oh, I have a spare key. And they went inside, and they were wandering around. And I guess she said, oh, look, what is that on his bed? And as she bent over to look at it, he shot her twice in the head and killed her.

Yeah, that wasn't me gasping. No, that one got me. Yeah, so he killed her. And then he staged the scene to make it look like Sam had sexually assaulted her. And they weren't romantically involved. They were just friends. But he staged it to make it look like Sam had sexually assaulted her, killed her, and then had either gone on the lam or killed himself. So at first, for obvious reasons,

the police did suspect Sam. And they launched a manhunt for him, but they couldn't find him anywhere. And then they noticed something a little bit strange, which was that a 16-year-old kid had been withdrawing money from Sam's bank accounts in $400 increments. And they were like, Sam's bank accounts in $400 increments. And they were like, um, nope. So they confronted the kid and the kid said, oh, this man named Daniel Wozniak told me to do it.

He told me to wear a hat and not say anything. Wear a hat, but use my name. And then he also said, it's not illegal, I promise. Well, if that's not all the reason you need to do something. So,

yeah, they were like, well, okay, I mean, that didn't take very long. So they found Daniel Wozniak. And they arrested him two days before his wedding. Oh, sorry, this is them. I'm sorry. This is... The lovely couple. No, they weren't a couple. This is Sam.

Oh, shit. I thought that was the wedding couple. they weren't a couple this is Sam oh shit I thought that was the wedding couple you said the wedding sorry this is Sam and Julie I was prone he killed I'm sorry

these are the two friends Sam and Julie it's very sad I'm sorry that I just sprung that on you I still haven't gotten a hang of this alright

they arrested him at his freaking bachelorette or bachelorette party that would have been a fun twist they arrested him at his bachelor party.

That's just, talk about a Jason Bateman movie. So here's the thing. Nobody sent in a photo for this and it's probably because I put it up like 24 hours ago. But nobody sent a photo

so I was like, Alexander. And I told my brother to make a photo, make a drawing for me. So, Alexander, your masterpiece is going to arrive now. This is a visual of Christine and Em

crashing Zach Bagans' bachelor party. There is the police arresting us and you were like Zach or you told me Zach invited us there's Zach with his chain necklace yeah oh I see it look at his little guns

so of course when I first saw this I was like oh that's so funny so that's me with the handcuffs arresting Zach Bagans and my brother was like no oh, that's so funny. So that's me with the handcuffs arresting Zach Baggins. And my brother was like, no, no. That's you being a psycho and crashing his party. And I was like, oh, okay.

I guess that makes a lot more sense. So anyway, they arrested him at his bachelor party. His friends had actually just paid the bill at Tsunami Sushi in Huntington Beach when police swarmed in and took him away in handcuffs.

So that's fun. And then at first, Daniel, for obvious reasons, claimed he had nothing to do with it. He was completely innocent. And then they were like, oh, also can we get a DNA sample? And he was like, oh, actually, hold on, I've changed my story. BRB. Hold on for one second.

So he said, actually what he said was, okay, what do you want me to say? I saw Julie's body. Yeah, I did. Okay. And they were like, okay, I guess that's great. Thank you for telling us. And anyway, he was really mad about it. But he said he had seen Julie's body in Sam's apartment. And he said, Sam came over to his house and said, I did something bad. I killed my friend, Sam's apartment and he said Sam came over to his house and said I did something bad. I killed my friend Julie. That's pretty bad. And they were like okay so you saw the body and he was

like yeah I saw two bullet wounds in her head and they were like hold up because when they analyzed the scene they were like there was only one bullet wound in her head and they didn't see the second one until they did a full autopsy so they were like well you would only know that if you had done it yourself.

So he was clearly, that's literally how he implicated himself, was just by saying, oh, she got shot twice in the head. And they're like, we didn't even know that for a long time. So they were like, well, we know you didn't. And then after that, he went

and called Rachel, his fiancee, on the phone. And she's like, I'm going to tell, I'm going to tell. And he was like, don't tell them or I'll be screwed. And the guy who was like the, you know, police person. A cop? Whatever. Yeah.

English is not my first language. There it is. Drink twice. Oh, was that a drink twice? Yeah, two for, okay. So the guy who was with him at the phone was like, dude, they're taping these calls. And he's like, oh yeah, I forgot. He wasn't the brightest, I guess. Although he did have a nice voice, apparently, so. So, they were like, they brought him back into the room, and they were like, I mean, we know you did it, and he immediately

confessed, and the confession is on YouTube, and it is creepy, so if you want to watch it, and he talks the whole thing through. I was going to play it, but then I was like, that would just be me sitting back and playing YouTube for you for a while, so you guys can go look it up. But it was was he said quote

I'm crazy and I did it and I said did what he said I killed Julie and I killed Sam I don't know why I did it mainly it was the money and it seemed so easy and then he started laughing but like crying like laughing and crying at the same time like hysterically it is a very creepy video um and then he kind of goes into like what he did and how he made them bend over and like shot them in the head when they weren't looking um and they asked him why he had killed they were like why did you kill julie if you'd already killed sam for the money and he said well i thought it would make it look like sam did it and so it was just going to make it easier to get away with and i was like oh, oh God, no. Very sad, very messed up.

And it took more than 130 court hearings over the course of five years, six months, and 16 days for the trial to even begin. So it took, how? Five and a half years. They apparently had 25,000 pieces of evidence. Wow. Yeah, it was, and it was really awful for the families, too, because they had to go into every court, like, every court thing, you know, like you do. They really nailed that. Yeah.

Alright, let's just move on. But so the trial finally began five and a half years later, and in 2012, so like, within the midst of this like waiting period, Rachel, his fiance, was actually arrested. And she was charged with three felony counts of accessory after the fact for lying multiple times to the police. There she is. So she had said that she was like, oh, there was another guy that day. I saw him with Sam.

I saw another guy. She created a whole fake person that she said was there that might have killed him and created a bunch of lies. And so they... So she knew the whole time about this? Yeah. Okay. I didn't know if he was trying to woo her.

She lied to the police from the beginning, so they were like, well, she clearly knew something. Okay, she didn't know that. But she made up, like, fake people. Apparently at one rehearsal for a musical or play she was in, she, like, was sobbing backstage and said, I think my friend is dead, and I think my other friend did it. And that was as far as they, like...

Wow. Yeah. And that was, like, before they even found Julie's body, so she knew. Oh, okay. Yeah, that that was, like, before they even found Julie's body, so she knew. Oh, okay. Yeah, that kind of tells you. Yeah, she, yeah. Yeah, she did it.

She did something bad. Boop, boop, boop, boop, boop. Dream! Oh, that was fun. Okay, so. Where's your wine? I know, right? I should have brought a box with me.

This is why you need a box. That was really loud. Don't say they're going to bring me a box of wine. Wow, that would be great for a day. Okay. So this is me forcing fun drawings into fun things, game things. Oh, my God. Are you having a stroke? Okay, hold on.

Everybody close your ears. That's the problem. I am too sober. So this is me, okay. Here, this is me forcing this game into my story is what I'm trying to say. So at the time that she was arrested, she was working at Medieval Times.

Do people know what that is? Okay, here's the thing. I don you don't me neither which is why i was like it's like a west coast thing no that's it no blaze in connecticut went all the time apparently it's a restaurant where they have like jousting people like renaissance people yeah but it's it's like an it's in Midwest, too, and it's like a thing. And everyone, when I said I didn't know what that was, looked at me like I was absolutely crazy. I mean, at least English isn't my first language, but it is yours.

Wow, I'm getting a lot of mileage out of that one today. I've never heard of that. It's like a restaurant, and you go and you pick a side, and they, like, joust. My brother went, like, two weeks ago in Vegas. They make you joust each other? No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. There's, like, you pick a, you're, like, on a side, like, the good guys and bad guys. Oh.

A person who doesn't know what it is is explaining it to another person who doesn't know what it is. I'm like, so there's a jouster while you're trying to eat. There's a microphone, so it doesn't matter. doesn't know what it is. I'm like, so there's a jouster while you're trying to eat. But we have microphones, so it doesn't matter. So, anyway, she was working at Medieval Times as, like, one of the characters. Jousters. Jouster people,

I guess. Flower queen. Wench? A wench. That's the one. Okay, so here. Pickles on a stick! That's me! Pickles on a stick! I love how this nice thing is like boosting her chest up all big.

You know, I love going to Renaissance Fairs and there's one specific girl at a very specific Renaissance Fair and every year I've gone, she uses her boobs to hold pickles. Cute. Like she like, for her, like she doesn't sell those.

Oh, I was like, what a nice thing. She like sells pickles, but to keep hers away from everyone else is just goes like, doop, and, like, for her, like, she doesn't sell those. Oh, I was like, what a next thing. She, like, sells pickles, but to keep hers away from everyone else is just goes, like, and just, like, keeps it there. And then, like, she's very busty. And so... Yeah, I can tell. I mean, she's holding pickles. But she, like, holds it high enough that she can just eat it without, like,

using her hands. So she can still work, but she's like... I'm always impressed by her. I think that's her, right there. I'm always impressed. I just really like this jog. I just was like, I mean, I know it's not a restaurant, but I just love it. And there's Fox. I don't know what's going on, but I really like it. So she pleaded anyway. So she was arrested. She was working in medieval times and they arrested her. I assume she was probably dressed as a wench while she was arrested because, you know, that's kind of the theme with the bachelor party and all that.

So she pleaded not guilty, and as of now, the trial is still pending. Still? Yeah, this was six years ago, so it's still chugging along. Finally, on December 16, 2015, after only one hour of jury deliberations, Daniel Wozniak was convicted of both murders

and sentenced to death. And actually, that was the shortest deliberation in the history of California to put someone on death row. So, wow, went real fast. He's now at San Quentin State Prison, and he will be there until his execution. However, I was reading about this, there's typically a 25-year delay between a death sentence being handed down and it being actually carried out. And that gap is getting longer and longer, especially now that capital punishment has been on hold in California for 10 years. So I was like, okay, I mean, let's not even go there. But the point is, I read a really sad, pretty sad thing that was, so Sam Hur's dad, who now in his like late 60s basically said like i don't

think i'll be alive when he you know gets out sees justice no like gets out because he's he's not alive i don't know just keep going no i'd actually really like to hear you keep explaining it yeah i'm doing the michael scott thing where where I'm just nervous so I'm just going to keep opening my mouth. I'm doing the gym thing where I'm like, no, keep going. This is great. I want to hear more. So basically, who knows if it'll ever be, you know, if he'll ever actually get executed. But that's what's on the table right now. And for a really fun fact, there's a website called danielwazniakismyfriend.com

She wrote it! And she is here today! That girl is crazy! It's a girl? Oh! I thought it was a dude. And she's crazy. She's crazy. Good, so here's fun.

This is fun. So it's an anonymous blogger who's apparently a lady that's crazy. She's crazy. Good. So here's fun. This is fun. So it's an anonymous blogger who's apparently a lady that's crazy. She's not anonymous. She's not anonymous anymore. Read the comments. Oh, read the comments so people figured it out. Because I read the homepage and it was like, I won't tell you who I am. And I'm like, okay, I don't really want to know. Basically, she said she knew Daniel Wozniak before he killed Sam and Julie.

So she, okay, yeah, she said she knew Daniel Wozniak before he killed Sam and Julie. So she, okay, I, yeah, okay. So she basically gives all these, like, intense updates on his life in jail. And at first I was like, what a fucking weird blog. But then I, like, got so sucked in that I started reading about, like, what cleaning materials he uses to clean the floors. Really? And I was like, what? Like, this is so bonkers. And she was like, oh, um um I know he did a bad thing

but he's my friend so I'm gonna just keep being his friend and I'm like what that's not how that works um and she's like I'm not saying like he didn't do it and I'm like okay good because he's like on to throw for it but whatever so she like, but I know there's good in him. And so I guess they talk all the time, and she sends him books. I don't know. She sends him specific cleaning materials for his prison. And so it was a weird, weird read. So if you're up at 1 a.m. and you're like, I can't sleep,

that's maybe the way to go is all I'm saying and I guess she's releasing a book where she's going to reveal her identity even though apparently we already know she's just some crazy lady but yeah so that is the story of Daniel Wozniak oh there he is he lost the nice beard Oh, there he is. There he is. He lost the nice beard.

Anyway, I mean, that's all I got, people. And. Wait, hold on. That. Wait. Hold on. Start over. Eva, edit this.

Eva, cut it out. And. And. What the hell? And. That's. Why. We. Drink. And... What the hell? And... That's... Why... We... Drink!