And That's Why We Drink - E91 Mad Lib Disease and an Everlasting Faint

Episode Date: October 28, 2018

We're back in real time! Christine has redirected her wedding planning energy into Halloween surprises! And don't worry, it's only part one of our Halloween celebrations because you know us, we can't do anything just once, especially during spooky season. Today Em and Christine bring you extra special creepy compilations - Em relays the scariest moments from their mom Linda's life and Christine brings us the many genres of Ouija board murder. And here's the thing, we're not planning on making a homemade Ouija board out of hotel wine glasses during our upcoming tour - but if it happens, it happens, OK? And that's why we drink!Please consider supporting the companies that support us! Get 15% off your first order with Thirdlove when you go to thirdlove.com/drinkGet 2 months of unlimited Skillshare classes for just $.99 at skillshare.com/drinkGet your first Quip refill pack for free at getquip.com/atwwdGet your first 3 bottles of wine from First Leaf for just $15, with free shipping, and if you rate those wines you'll get an extra $10 off your next box! Go to tryfirstleaf.com/drink

welcome to spooky time it's been so long since we've recorded i know it feels like off like i don't know what to like i don't i feel like i'm are you okay oh yeah you definitely lost your touch i was hoping i was hoping you'd just interrupt me oh well i do that often that's a fair thing to assume that i would do the one time i need it to happen right right right um i do actually you know on a very serious note can i issue like a quick apology note that i've been meaning to say to who to like you guys and everybody okay don't don't freak out i just i do want to say sorry i know i do want to say sorry um because as of a few weeks ago i'm officially off the market oh christ i know it's really hard for everybody even i looked at each other like what the fuck

is going on okay you guys got way too intense like i was gonna drag it out for a really long time and then you guys started making me sweat because you were staring at me like anyway i do want to apologize i know that we're gonna lose a lot of our listeners over it right uh-huh but you just come to me it's fine yeah i mean they i'm not technically off the market not quite not not legally anyway no not legally so i just i want to say you know this is your first married podcast to everyone who's lost their shot better luck next time in another life perhaps in a glitch in the matrix perhaps. Anyway, congratulations on now having two rings on your finger to clack around in an oil.

Thank you. They clink, blaze can do it now. You had a blaze do it at dinner. It was kind of funny. I did. I had both of them clinking their drinks with their rings. Very natural. It's just natural.

Just like me. I made my whole body shiver. It was super fun for everyone. Yes. You got married. That's correct. And a lot of people were, I remember last week saying, can't wait to listen to the episode this Sunday. And it ended up being another pre recorded episode

or live episode. So this is the official one. Yes, I am married and I'm in a cat pajama outfit. Yeah, so things are going great for her. Things are looking up. Do you want to talk about your wedding? Sure. A lot of people want to know what's going on really wild really fun there were a lot of germans and austrians there there were there were a lot and um they were a riot one of them were a dandrol it's a whole thing my one uncle walked around and later hosen and a sign that said wedding crusher and the staff was like is he supposed to be here and i was like i guess so at this Sure. Just let him be. We had geo and tonic was a signature cocktail. Yep. It was fun.

I'm officiated. I did. They did a fantastic job. I did a lot of compliments. I, I wasn't sure if I was going to make it funny or not. And then I was like, why else would I be up here? So once I got up there, I decided I was going to make a couple of jokes. It was fun.

I didn't know how it was gonna go well some of the jokes i like forced you to say because i wrote them into the script some yes which i was like i feel free if this is like awkward or weird out loud just nix them i also i made some of my own and then i was like i don't know how serious christine's taking her own wedding so maybe i should ask her permission first and so then the night before i like read some of them to Christine. I was like, are you down with this? This is okay.

And it ends up being fine. And unfortunately, the next day I was like, remember when I read you those? And I was like, I don't. And I was like, oh, good. Okay. Glad I got your kind of consent. Also, I walked Gio down the aisle. That's right.

I didn't even tell him. I didn't know. It was kind of, oops, I forgot. Apparently, Christine was going to like face to face ask me once I got to Ohio I wanted to like but then you fell asleep in a chair in my house yeah right and then I so I didn't know until the rehearsal when the wedding coordinator was like oh you're walking Gio down the aisle right and up until that point the answer was no but nobody else was around to give her an answer except me and I was like yeah that's definitely happening write that down in that in that black pen and don't let anyone write it in sharpie don't show

christine just in case this is a mistake it was not a mistake i had planned it out blaze and i planned that part out and um it was good and geo was good yeah he he's clambered down the aisle he did i basically ran down the aisle because, his anxiety came out and he didn't know what was going on. So he scrambled a little, which meant I scrambled with him. So, but it was fine. And everyone had a great time. My mom was like, why doesn't your sister walk him down the aisle? And I was like, A, she's in high heels, B, she's 13 and like eight pounds. Like he's going to just knock her directly onto her face. I had already coordinated with Alexander's girlfriend to make sure that there were dog and or cat treats available because once i walked down the aisle i obviously had to be on

stage right so i had to pass geo off to ally right and so i was like i need you to make sure there's something for him to eat so he doesn't howl through my part of the wedding this is about me and it's about me right yes it was really. And I don't have any photos yet, like official photos. But I will say I have. OK, I know I said earlier I'm going to be like serious and then I wasn't. But like actually for real, real quick. OK. I keep doing this and then everyone's looking at me.

It's so awkward. So I will say I got a sneak peek video from the videographer and I wasn't going to share it because I've had like some pretty severe like body image issues over the last year. And so I was like, I don't want people commenting or like looking at it. But then I was like, you know, it's super fun and sweet. And I shared it and everyone was like super nice and kind and like nobody said anything negative. And I was very afraid because then Lisa Lampanelli shared it on her page. And I was like, I don't even want to read the comments because I don't know. But everyone was very supportive and sweet so I want to say thank you to everybody who went and

looked at that on my page and like didn't say like oh hey Christine you gained 40 pounds oh my gosh no you look very beautiful in my mind is what was going to happen not that I think any of you would do that but they're you know you never know so you know you looked great everyone was so sweet and it was super fun also your whoever did your makeup she killed it because the next morning you woke up and you still had a full face of makeup on I kind of clambered into my home dragging the bridal gown behind me and my mom was like oh no your whole family's already here and I was like hey everyone and everyone's like wow did you get up early and do your makeup I was like totally you know me got up early and did my makeup yes Yes, I did that. Of course. It did. No, it lasted. It was great.

Also, side note, that was my first time in Ohio. And I've gotten a lot of people asking since before I even went if I was going to go to Grater's ice cream. Right. I went and it blew my mind. Oh, I'm so glad. I would have been really sad. There were seven different flavors that I wanted to try. I got through three and I was like, well, these are just so good.

I don't care. And so I got all three of those and I had a blast. And I just wanted to, before people ask questions, because I definitely made it available on Snapchat that I was at Grader's. For people on, for people who are wondering, what was I going to say?

I don't know. Oh, this is all about me being in Ohio, not you. Right, sure. Well, I was going to say, oh, for people this is all about me being in ohio not you right sure well i was gonna say oh for people like em who were like visiting for the first time truly that's what i was gonna say uh i had at our wedding we had um like a cincinnati late night food bar so they were like skyline chili conies and graters ice cream and busking cookies and so i i feel like everyone got kind of a little taste a A taste of Ohio. Yeah. Yeah. It was pretty good. It was a good time. Yeah, it was fun.

You want to talk about the bowling ball? Oh, yeah. My aunt shows up and she's like, normally, listen, she's like, normally, she goes, I listened to the beginning and end of your podcast. And I was like, what? Like, I don't know. I didn't know that she listened to any of it. I didn't know that any of your family did.

I didn't either. Also, and that's why we drink was quite the slogan in all of the wedding speeches. Oh, right. Every single family member was like, to Blaze and Christine. And that's why we drink. And I was like, oh, I guess. Every single person said that. It was hilarious.

Yeah. And my aunt came to the brunch and was like, so she got me like got us like a lot of really sweet wedding gifts. But then she's like, this is like a special one I want to give you in person and i was like okay and she's like it's very heavy and i was like okay and i took it and it literally fell to the ground because it is very heavy and i was like what is this she goes so i listen to the beginning and end of your show because i everything else is too scary and i'm like oh okay that's fair fair um and she's like so i was listening to an episode where you mentioned bowling and i'm like probably every

episode we mentioned bowling i was like oh yeah we talk about bowling sometimes and she's like, so I was listening to an episode where you mentioned bowling. And I'm like, probably every episode we mentioned bowling. I was like, oh, yeah, we talk about bowling sometimes. And she's like, and so I thought of you because your grandfather, who's passed away, but she's like, your grandfather used to tell this scary story to me when I was three years old. And she like printed it out and gave it to me. And it's a story of like this ghost who goes bowling with a man's skull that he like decapitated, you know, classic German. Right. That's something you tell your three year old. Right a thousand percent yeah she's like yeah so i've been traumatized by this and i was like yeah i don't blame you so is there like a german like

child cautionary tale store that she bought this from so she goes i found this and bought it for you and i'm like what could this possibly be right she pulls out a freaking bowling ball with a skull in it like an actual cleat it's like it looks like a massive like how like uh like a crystal ball like a crystal ball yeah it's like a it's a true clear see-through bowling ball with a skull inside it's horrifying not a real skull before people ask and then we had to i put him he'd please put it in a suitcase and take it home so now it's in our podcast studio so thank you to angelica for that we love it i love it it fits right in no i was shown it and i was like if you don't want this please give it to me

please all right so that was oh i also want to say real quick yeah the photographer i think he was talking to you and he's like oh yeah m told me about your show that's so cool and i was like oh thanks you know whatever and he's like do you think anyone would like because we're taking photos outside and he's like do you think anyone would be out there and i was like, do you think anyone would like, because we're taking photos outside, and he's like, do you think anyone would be out there? And I was like, no. And then we're out there taking photos, and this woman walks by and goes, Christine! And I was like, do I know that person? And she's like, I love your show. Keep on rocking.

Or I don't know. She said something. And I was like, oh, my God. And the photographer, David, just looks at me and goes, did it happen? Did it just happen? Oh, my God. And I was like, I guess so. I don't know who that is.

So whoever that was, he recognized me in a bridal gown out in the front of the, but she's the only one who will ever get to see you in a, in a wedding dress. So that's true. Um, also when we were in Ohio, I also got recognized at Christine's. I'm still offended by this. I was there four times before you got there. And then it was a CVS relatively close to Christine's house. And so Allison and I needed to go to CVS to pick some stuff up and all of a sudden this girl was like are you M from the podcast and I went yes and I was like this is not the time I literally just got off of a plane and then slept in Christine's chair for seven hours I was like this is not the time but uh I looked like garbage and I'm glad she appreciated me anyway and then we actually

got an email from her her name is Kate and she apologized for looking like garbage and I'm glad she appreciated me anyway. And then we actually got an email from her. Her name is Kate. And she apologized for looking like garbage, although I did not think that. But I'm glad we both felt insecure in that moment. So lovely. We shared. We shared that together. I thought that was funny because I go there all the time and I was like, I actually I'm

so glad no one has because I every time I go there, it's like I roll out of bed and I'm like, right, I need milk and I don't want anyone to see me this way. Yep. So it was fun. Yes. So that's that. That's that on that. Also, happy Halloween.

Is there anything else? Almost. Almost Halloween. This comes out the Sunday before Halloween. Okay, sure. And then we technically have Halloween 2.0 where it's the one after halloween okay sure okay we get two halloweens sure welcome to early halloween welcome to early halloween yes where christine dressed up as a sex kitten yes on accident don't act like i did that on purpose

i'm gonna sound like a crazy christine just have like some cat like a combination of multiple cats i have a cat onesie and i wanted an excuse to wear it and i showed up and i thought about dressing up and i was like no christine's probably not going to be dressed up and then i show up and christine's in a cat onesie with makeup on her face and i was like oh i should have really dressed up but she also not only had cider waiting for me and eva she like halloween the crap out of this place because we're sitting at a table right now that is just decorated in cobwebs and autumnal decorations listen blaze left me home alone what else was i gonna do so uh thank you for thank you making it such a special occasion i halloween is our our season you know oh yeah we got our reason for the season our witchy little eva here to celebrate our little

witch first i almost bought her a card that said baby's first halloween that was great it's a good time oh speaking of little witches um it was also allison's birthday this weekend and um i know this is a long little witch well my nickname for her is evil witch which is just so loving and really precious um but i will keep this short but we in the last episode that we recorded it was believed at that time we were going to catalina and then the way that things got planned it just was actually going to be much more chaotic logistically. There was like literally 11 different ways I had planned for us to get to Catalina and then it didn't, none of them worked. And I was like, okay, plan L. And I was like, we're going to San Diego. So I've gotten some

people being like, I thought you said Catalina and lied to them. Yeah. What are you trying to make me look like an idiot idiot? So, no. I just wanted to correct things. Also, there were three things I want to talk about that I will do very quickly. One, in San Diego, there was this thing called the, it was in Belmont Park and it was a ropes course where, like, you literally had to hang from, like, a zip line-esque rope. Oh, my. And then it was, like, different little obstacles that you had to, like, run across. Like, they had, like.

Oh, right. Like, you're standing up really, really tall and there's like a like a shaky plank of wood you have to walk across or a rope course but you're like in the sky and like obviously you can't fall and drop but it was very fun that was like one of my favorite things that we did there and we were the only adults because in hindsight everyone else was five it's like that show american ninja warrior no i mean maybe but i mean that's what i saw myself i imagine that's how it was when you were on it two steps and i was like i'm a ninja wipe out but okay yes it was like wipe out but you can't wipe out okay oh that's ideal yeah and then the other thing i had i usually am not impressed with like my like either gift giving abilities like my creativity with

dates but this one actually impressed myself and i wanted to recommend it to anyone in the san diego area trying to really woo someone because i'm just i'm making myself the official wingman um so there's this company and this is not an actual ad but they just deserve credit it's called beach fire guys um beach fire guys i think dot com and i think it was beach fire guy wasn't it oh i don't know i googled whatever it doesn't matter i think it was beach fire guys you're probably right and it's this company where you can have them pre-arrange a fire out on the beach in san diego and so that was one of the things that i surprised allison with and she didn't see it coming but they had already set up this giant fire with tiki torches and if you pay extra which i did they also give you like s'mores fixings and all that so So super cute.

By the time she we got out there, you get like three or four hours out there and you text them like they have they set it up and then you text them and like 20 minutes before you're going to leave. And then they come and do all the cleanup. So sweet. So I was pretty impressed with myself and finding that. And if anyone is looking for like a cute thing to do for someone they care about, I recommend it a lot. Then the third thing is I found this restaurant that I like can't stop thinking about. And like, I'm telling you, when I ate the food there, I know this is going to be dramatic, but we all know who I am at this point.

I'm a Gemini. It's called Extraordinary Desserts. And my first bite into that food, actually one almost cried and two called my mom to tell her about it like really changed me what like this was the dessert so um the whole place by the way it's like truly looks like food right out of food network like it looks like it's art and you should not be able to afford it let alone eat it right they give you like a paper and pen for you to write down you get to walk by all of it and then write down the things you want and then you go to your table and you give the list to the waiter and he brings you back one of

each. And, uh, the thing that I had both times we went was, um, this blueberry cheesecake coffee cake with strawberries and blueberries on top. Oh, that sounds good. Like I usually have a hard time figuring out things that I would put on my, like my death row last meal. Like if I get five foods, what would I eat eat that went all the way up that's absolutely one of the things i would eat holy shit hands down and it was so good and i'm not a coffee drinker i'm a tea drinker and it was also a tea house where it had this menu of like 20 different types of tea like iced tea or hot tea both and like it comes by the kettle or it came individually it's like i just had a freaking blast at this place so if anyone's near there go

for it in In San Diego? In San Diego. What's it called? Extraordinary Desserts. Sounds like a show. It should be. I watch it. Anyway, I wanted to steal your thunder and talk about things.

No, no. I'm glad we did. I'm glad we did. It deserves its own mention. Okay. So this is our Halloween episode. And I know that our intro is long, but I promise this is all on brand. It is.

Okay. So here we go. So, well, first of all, I'm going to give this to you. I don't know if this is going to make it is okay so here we go so well first of all i'm gonna give this to you i don't know if this is gonna make it into the recording but i got you little halloween gifties hold on what the i hid them in the secret you ah no way wow you really like pulled an m and just like surprised the crap out of me today between costumes and decoration what happens when i don't have a wedding to plan. I like just have to plan. Oh, this is a new you. Plan other shit. Aww.

This is for you. So sweet. And this is for Eva. Eva! Eva gets a whole bottle of wine. Have fun, Eva. I didn't, I was like gonna put a LaCroix in there and that felt kind of weird so I just left it empty. Okay, so mine is a neon green, neon yellow bucket with a Frankenstein and Eva's is a

neon pink with a kitty cat. a little black cat and then there's a little fun glow-in-the-dark reese's cups and monster peeps and a taboo list instead of a to-do list and stickers and a little stuffed man so you got a little bird man and then you got a little bird lady. We have a bird couple. That's so nice. And this has a mustache. Also, I forgot to tell you, this cobweb is glow-in-the-dark. And so are your Reese's. It's taking my breath away.

So I want to make sure. Moment by moment. As many things as possible were glow-in-the-dark. Oh, and a card. Should we read this later? Sure. It's not very exciting. It's just a little. Babya's first halloween handsome devil it's actually also very good wine so you

got wine that describes me so we both win anyway one time i did buy that um for allison and she's like really is this supposed to be like this is about m and i was like actually yeah that was my joke but whatever oh it is a good one well i feel like a real ass i didn't bring anything that's why last year you did a whole video that everyone keeps finding on youtube and i was like okay oh we're gonna repost that for sure on our friendiversary in a couple days that's true that's true um okay well this is early halloween so early i'll see you post i'm just step one um also before we start on our stories i have a couple jokes that i found about halloween guys the fucking arm joke again that you always tell at all the live shows great joke and you know it at multiple live shows she's

done the my arms are tired from flying in here and it's and it's killed every time because well it's killed because m goes that's not funny and then everyone laughs at m so that goes the real punchline goes real well for us so these are from funology.com okay why didn't the skeleton want to go to school because he had a femur well that's pretty good no no but it's good i like it oh his heart wasn't in it okay now this is when they get real weird and like i think four-year-olds wrote them so can't wait we'll see or you know us what or you or us when is it bad luck to be followed by a black cat um i will advise you don't think too hard about that oh um when there's cat food around

i don't know when you're a mouse close what do ghosts eat for supper nothing spook heady god they just get worse like this there's one more and it's the worst one best worst who's to say what do you do when 50 zombies surround your house pray what you hope it's halloween okay that's the best one though i know it's my favorite that one has a little wit to. I hope like whatever child said it was like with a hand on their hip. Yes, exactly. And had two exclamation points. And then I forgot that I also had one more thing for you guys. I got you one more gift. What? I watched Hocus Pocus. Eva and I are so happy. You almost just choked on that cookie. I did. I watched it. Thank you to everyone who has yelled at me about it. And it wasn't because of you guys. are so happy you almost just choked on that cookie i did i watched it thank you to everyone who has yelled at me about it and it wasn't because of you guys oh clearly you didn't

even tell us you were gonna do it i mean not you guys i mean it wasn't because of everyone who yelled at me about it got it which was not you guys a lot of people on the internet were yelling at me and i was like i'm not gonna do it but i did the fear that we were worried about is that because people had forced the opinion into you that it was going to be a great movie it might have been overrated so i wrote down some of my thoughts okay so this could go one one of two ways the main character banks right right he's like ducky from ncis do we know this okay just making sure we all right is it ncf no no it's it isn't but isn't ducky i think ducky's no no ducky's an old guy he's um shit you're right you're right you're right you're

right i didn't know that you guys just blew my mind he's definitely he's a the nerdy one the dorky one yes and banks are like the main guy is that max no banks banks wow okay i don't know he's he's definitely what's it. McGee. Yes. Sorry. That's the one. McGee. Yes. Okay. I did not know that.

Step one. At first, I mean, every time I've heard this movie, I thought the witches were like the good guys because they're always the characters you see. And I was just like, what? What a table turning for you. And then they like actually literally hanged them in the movie. And I was like, what the frick? Like, I thought they were going to go poof.

We disappeared. 1993 was a wild year. Yeah, they did not mess around with that um i wrote they hang them wtf um my favorite character are the grunge kids like the 90s grunge kids definitely my favorite characters um i was a little weirded out by some of the like virgin like teen sex stuff yes but you know it was the 90s i get it and sarah jessica parker being like i want teenage boys or whatever i was like right okay can i hang them on a hook and let me play with them yeah yeah it was a little like oh keep in mind this was right at the this was the year before her carrie bradshaw right set like what before saxon city came out this was technically her audition

oh right they were like you nailed it they're like wow you want teenage boys i know just the show i will say i got emotional at the ending. It just was very like, it took me back because I didn't think I was going to get emotional. And I feel like a lot of the charm is that it's the nostalgia of it. So I feel like I missed out on kind of the like childhood experience of it. But I enjoyed it overall. And I did it for you too. Yay!

So stop yelling at me and mailing me DVDs, everybody. Okay, that's all I have. I'm going to stop trying to, like, force it. No, that was all worth it. Well. All worth it. Welcome to Halloween episode one. Well, I also knew that this was going to be a lengthy one because we were going to talk about your wedding.

I knew some Halloween stuff would happen at some point. Right. So I did something a little different. Ooh! And I tried to think, what was, like, the scariest thing in my life when I was little? I mean, I feel like I have a couple guesses, but... Well, the answer is my mother.

So when she... Not... I mean, only when she would get mad. But, like, the thing that i was most afraid of sure okay in general as a child was like oh my mom i didn't know what kind of direction we were going with that well we're going in um my mother's personal life where i specifically asked her to tell me her stories i love that oh linda these are my mom's true crime and paranormal personal stories yeah think, hells yeah. Think of it as a listener's episode on my end of just my mother.

Of Linda's stories. So we know they're like from the source. From the source. And literally, if you notice, I usually do bullets. This is literally me free writing as she was speaking. So you're getting basically her voice. Fantastic. Which means it might not make sense. So.

It'll make so much sense. Just grab a wine glass and then it not make sense um so it'll make so much sense just grab a wine glass and then it'll make sense my mom and i have this weird like if there are any medical doctors out there that want to like solve this case for us let us know but my mom and i both have this weird thing where the older we get we just stop we just don't know how to say words like just random we'll just replace words with completely different words that have no context or meaning and um is that called early onset dementia i think so because like i used to make fun of my mom all the time for doing it but now like in the last year or two like i do it all the time all the time and so like

i'm definitely turning into my mother and like or like what do you mean like no like if if my mom were saying like oh i went to the gas station, she would mean grocery store. Oh, I see. Like just totally just neglecting an actual word and just putting. Mad lib in it. Yeah. Mad lib in it left and right. If it's called the mad lib disease, I got it. It's now called the M disease. It's called someone find me a doctor.

Because like. It's only getting worse. Okay. So I tried to, I tried to like avoid any of that in these. Okay, so I tried to avoid any of that in these. So there are one, two, three, five different stories that my mom has gone through that came right to the top of her mind. Some of them I have mentioned before, but this is the from the source as detailed as possible version of it. Cool.

Would you prefer paranormal or true crime first? Or we can do a little weaving. Let's do a little weaving. Yeah. weave it in and out so there are three true crime oh and we'll do true crime so we'll do a true crime paranormal true crime paranormal true crime fantastic so i like how the one episode you do true crime is halloween which is like the one episode where i'm like shit i need to focus on something not true crime Okay, good. Well, I just thought like, you know, I have gotten a lot of DMs on, I think, Instagram, kind of a combination of everything.

But people have said like, you know, what are your personal stories? And then they've heard me talk about my friend's personal stories. And they're like, I know Linda's got some shit. So when do we get to hear about that? And I was like, right now, my thought was I would wait for like Mother's Day and make this the Mother's Day episode. Like just say all the wild shit my mom's gone through. But I was like, you know, my thought was I would wait for like Mother's Day and make this the Mother's Day episode. Like just say all the wild shit my mom's gone through. But I was like, you know what?

Now's the time. Give the people what they want. Yeah. I don't want to wait till April. May. May. May. Uh oh.

Okay. So here's the first true crime one. So this was in Fredericksburg where we live. And this was when I was a little kid. I'm not really sure of the year, but I was young enough that I remember her telling me this story all the time but I was also I had to have been like maybe five ish okay so she fun fact my dad is a chiropractor in Fredericksburg and he has a lot of his client base are the police department in Fredericksburg and so they around this time

they had all actually become friends and started partying together and they were all in their like you know late 20s they were also kind of like partiers when they weren't working and so my mom and dad had just come from a police party party with a bunch of police officers that just become my dad's client that sounds like a good time it apparently or it sounds like a really bad time. I can't decide. Well, my parents both really liked partying back in the day. And so I'm imagining it was a great party.

I know. I imagine because it's like you could go either one or two ways, like super fun, like let loose police officers or like police officers who were like, oh, it was like, no, it was like knowing my mother. It was like, I mean, Linda was there. She wouldn't be a boring party. She's not a stickler for fun. I mean, Linda was there.

She wouldn't be a boring party. She's not a stickler for fun. So I guess she had just come from a police party that night and she was actually preparing for another police officer's birthday party that night. What's going on in this town? So Fredericksburg is lonely. Wow. Sorry, the Milano got me. I thought it was like Fredericksburg is lonely.

It's really choking me up. I need a minute. All the police officers. I was like i was like shit i'm sorry i didn't mean to well so i guess my mom had just bought um like you know do you know what adirondack chairs are yes like the long the plastic ones though like the long oh yeah yeah the plastic version of adirondack chairs yeah yeah yeah the beachy kind of wood chairs so she had just bought a couple of those and she was parked out front of a um so my mom was out front of a grocery store and she had just or by that do you mean a gas station right i was waiting for you to say one of those interesting how that would be like the first sentence of this story um so there was a like

a party store next to it and she was in like the main parking lot for that whole strip mall, I guess. Right. She had just come out of the party store and got some plastic Adirondack chairs that were definitely too big for her car. But she was trying to fit them in the trunk. And she assumes that that was the beginning of when someone spotted her because she took a long time in the parking lot. And she says she was also dressed in a way where it was really hot out. So she was wearing short shorts and not that, you know, what you wear does not matter. I'm very aware of that. But her opinion in this story is based on

how I was dressed. This might have been when someone noticed me. Sure. So she spent a long time in the parking lot trying to get these chairs in the car. Then she went into the grocery store. And as soon as she went into the grocery store, she saw someone else come in who was a very creepy looking guy who had a short crew cut, really thick glasses and a baseball cap. And she said that he was just super creepy. She's never had a gut feeling this strong. She could just tell that he was just bad news and um he was following her all over the grocery store he had his own cart so it looked

like he was grocery shopping and wherever she was in the store he would always find a reason to like lean over her and her cart so like reach for food i mean this was also the 90s where i think fuck politeness wasn't such a common opinion. And so it's still hard. Yeah, still hard. And so she didn't say anything. She says that she like gave a couple dirty looks to like say, like, I know what you're doing and I don't like it. Right.

But she never vocally said anything. She just kept trying to avoid him. But he kept following her and finding reasons to like lean over her and brush against her body. What the fuck? And she finally got to the checkout line and she was reading a magazine and she remembers her, like her inner thoughts saying, you need to pay attention to your surroundings right now. And so she put the magazine down and she looked up and she couldn't find him.

And so she, this is the only time she's ever done this, but she went to the cashier and went to ask for the manager and said, there was this really creepy guy. The manager said, do you want me to walk you out to your car? And she said, yeah, I want you to. And so while they were walking to the car, she was describing the creepy guy. And the manager said, it sounds like that guy over there. And the guy was sitting in his car that was parked right next to my mom's car. Which is why she thinks someone might have noticed before she went in.

Right. And then like pulled the car up. which is why she thinks someone might have noticed before she went in. Right. And then like pulled the car up. And the car was parked in a very specific way where it was almost like diagonal or perpendicular to her car. So that if she were to get into the driver's seat and open the door, she would have triangle cornered herself in to his side passenger seat. And he could have pulled her into the car.

What the frick? And so, uh, the manager watched her get in the car and uh said call the police as soon as you get in the car and lock the doors i'm not gonna leave until i watch you lock the doors and drive away and so she called the police or she called like the dispatch and said cell phone what year is this the early 90s oh shit my mom loves her gadgets so thank god for that linda is like fucking on it. But that guy did not plan for that.

He was probably like, what is this contract? What's this gizmo? What's that bedazzled blackberry? It's probably too early for that. What is it? No, you know what? Probably a razor. A palm touch.

Oh, a palm pilot. A palm pilot. Fucking hell, yes. He's probably like, what's this palm pilot? You can talk to. The stylus is stylish. We'll know how outdated some of our listeners are when they're like, what's a palm pilot't want to know about that my sister asked me what a floppy disk was and i was like get out of here um so she got on the on the phone she was driving back to the house and the dispatcher said try to lose him and try to drive her you know don't drive near your house and uh said uh

oh sorry i i thought you meant the manager at the grocery store so then i was like oh jesus no the dispatch okay i get it and so uh the dispatch said uh if you want to make sure you definitely lose him or get him away from you drive straight to we have our hospital's called mary washington go to the mary wash emergency room because there's always police there that are on call oh sure so if you drive to that area there'll be a cop there and then she lost him but the funny ending to the story is that the person that was the dispatch that was on the line talking to her was actually someone that she had met at the police party the night before that had done a tequila shot off of her no that makes it the most linda story she said it might not be a tequila shot it was whatever comes with cream like some sort of apple pie thing so that was how my mom ended that story but she lost him that was all

the matters oh my god that's terrifying so the description sounds like a serial killer like crew cut thick glasses baseball cap yeah just like the creepiest guy one of those sketches so that's that story um okay would you like, well, I guess they're kind of the same. What about Jesus or what about God? I mean, you know. Jesus. Oh, no, now I have to pick one. I was going to say, you know, I love Jesus.

And then there was God. So you're right. You ruined that joke for me. God. Okay. Let's start with the father. Start with the father. Start with the father. And also I will make a disclaimer here that my mom does not necessarily identify in one belief system compared to another. So weird that this thing that this would happen to her, I think, because she's not someone who's very devout in any way. She identifies as Jewish, hence why I identify as Jewish. But I mean, we're very openminded to all beliefs. So I don't want this to, sure, sure, sure. You know? Okay. So, uh, my mom had a friend who was much more religious than us or just religious at all means much more religious than us. And my mom was curious about,

you know, starting our relationship with God or, you know, forming any version of religion. And her friend gave her a Bible and her friend said, you know, forming any version of religion. And her friend gave her a Bible and her friend said, you know, you should definitely read this, you know, just so that way, if you, that way you can make a, like an educated opinion about it. And you should also meet with my pastor. But the map, the pastor was all the way out in Maryland and it was a 90 minute drive. So my mom had called the pastor. Oh yeah. Nevermind. I forget where Virginia is. Nevermind. Figured it out. Yeah. Just, it's like an hour and a half away or it's really not that far. I always forget those States are actually close. Okay. Yeah.

Go on. So the pastor was like, the pastor was like 90 minutes away. And so it was kind of a far drive. And so my mom had spoken to the pastor on the phone and the pastor said, you know, you don't actually have to come to a church to build your relationship with God. You can just kind of, you know, start one yourself. It's all about just having communication. And if you, if it ever falls on you to, you know, just start talking, even in your car, just, you know, say, Hey God, just, you know, what's up. And so my mom was driving home on the beltway one day and she just decided she was going to start talking to God. And she remembers specifically saying, okay, God, I'm going to try talking to you. And, uh, she was saying, I don't know if there's like, I don't really know

what I want out of this. I just want to see where things go. Like, what are we? Um, labels on anything. I just want something casual right now. Um, and so she was saying like, I, I don't want labels on anything it's like i just want something casual right now um and so she was saying like i i don't know if i need a sign i just want to know that you know you're here with me or you know just give me some sort of sign and as she said that like right over where she was driving and it just came into her view there was this massive car accident ahead of her and so had she if she stopped short she wouldn't have been able to stop short in time and she would have crashed into the car into the cars in front of her and so she it's kind of hard to describe but she remembers jerking her steering wheel really really hard and

she was going like easily 60 miles an hour and do you know what a jersey wall is on the highway it's like those really thick concrete barriers that like only have like a like five feet of space in between them i didn't know that's what they're called but yeah it's like there's no way you could aim and there's no way like even if you aim there's no way you would successfully drive through any of them but the way that my mom steered the wheel she doesn't really remember what happened but her car moved sideways and fit perfectly through the concrete uh through the jersey walls and um she's like there's she swears she's like there's no way i i don't even remember seeing them before i was going through them there's no way i could have aimed i don't even have good vision like she should have basically out of fear swerved and just hit concrete and just gone into a car accident

anyway but so she ended up perfectly, like with only a matter of inches between the walls and her car on either end. She slid through them and then the car swiveled around and like spun out and then halted on its own. And so when she like looked up, she assumed she had hit a tree, but she had actually crashed

into a field of three crosses. And then she looked behind her to see the accident and the driver that was behind her was in the process of not being able to stop in time and crashed and killed the people in front of his car oh my god which means if she had not spun out he would have crashed into her car and killed her my god that is terrifying so she actually had a couple meetings that day that she wasn't able to make because she had to be a witness and like, right, be there for the cops. And she actually was on the scene and being interviewed for a while. And then by the time

she got out, she had some time before one of her next appointments. And so she'd gotten there early. And while she was driving to that appointment, she started talking to God again and was like, in a non-funny way, being like, ha ha ha, that was funny. Like, I, like, maybe you, like, I see, I asked for a sign and then that happened. But like, I, I don't really know if that was just like a weird coincidence. Like, I think like the only way I could believe in this is through like, you know, you got to give me some sort of like a series of miracles or something. Like, otherwise I'm, I just, I'm too unsure of things. Like I just need

a, like, God, let me just crash your car to ask for another one. She's like, I need a bunch of miracles to be able to, to understand that you're actually listening to me and like showing yourself. So anyway, she got to this appointment early and the receptionist was like, oh, well, you know, he's not ready yet, but why don't you sit down? I'll get you a magazine. And so she sat down in the lobby and the receptionist brought her a magazine. And on the cover, it said 12 miracles. Ooh. And that was my mom's, I guess, aha moment of like, okay, God, I get it. Like, you heard me.

And that's that on that. For one paranormal story. The next one is one of her many famous hotel stories not the one where she drowned the place she said this is probably if besides the stalker um in the grocery store this is like one of her more scarier experiences oh my god so she was visiting california and she was in a hotel where she doesn't remember the name but it was all white and historic and it's like a famous hotel and it starts with a c she thinks but she doesn't remember do you know where in california east bay

oh never mind i don't know uh she said that she was there for business and all of her colleagues were downstairs at a meeting and her whole job was to be at the end of everything was to pay the bill at the end of this trip that was like her big responsibility she had left and since all of her colleagues were downstairs she went up early and she went to a hotel into her hotel room by herself and right around the time she closed the door a couple minutes later she heard a really wild banging on the door and she asked who is it and these two men very loudly started screaming not safe for work guys started screaming we're gonna fuck you oh no and uh she didn't know what to say so she was like i think you have the wrong door the wrong room like i'm not who you think i am and they said no bitch

we just saw you with your long hair and red coat walk into this room, and we're going to bend you over and do some very graphic things. Oh, my God. And she was indeed wearing a red coat and had long black hair. So she called the operator, and nobody answered. She called the operator again. Nobody answered. She was screaming in her hotel, hoping someone else would hear her,

that there were men trying to break into her room, and they were continuing to tell her what they were gonna do to her they actually were banging on the door so intensely that they broke the lock on the door so just the chain was keeping them apart great from her she called 9-1-1 and she had a uh like a key chain swiss army knife right they didn't see what the knife was but she had a knife and she said, I have a fucking knife in here and I'm going to cut your fucking balls off if you come in. And so they, she looked in the people because they had backed away and she thought that they had gone into another room, but they had actually, uh, were in the staircase where the staircase

goes and they were hiding in there. Oh, for fuck's sake. And before they went and hid into the staircase, they pulled the fire alarm. So my mom's big fear at that point was like, other women are going to be coming out of their rooms now, and they're going to shove. They're not going to use the elevator. They're going to use the stairs. So I guess luckily that wasn't actually their plan.

Their plan was just a distraction in case the security came. They just wanted like a pile of people in their way. luckily that did not happen however that was like a big thing my mom was afraid of the cops ended up showing up before any hotel security ever did and she reported everything and the security showed up 30 minutes later and she ripped them a whole new asshole i'm sure and uh she was like you have been gone for 35 minutes since the police got here the police have been here like you know i asked for you guys to be here an hour ago where were you do you know what two men can do to one woman to one woman in an hour or in 30 minutes in a fucking building like it's not like they had to travel there exactly

and so i guess i didn't get the timeline right but either that night they were like about to leave or the next morning they were gonna leave and since her job was to pay the bill for the hotel it was like for 20 different rooms it was like a 15 000 bill for the hotel and she ripped it up in their fucking faces and she was like do you know what could have fucking happened to me and like you guys aren't even apologetic or anything for god's sake and um and so apparently this was also a hotel that back in this was 1990 she said and back then like spas or you know that that kind of world wasn't always involved in hotels but this was a hotel specifically catered for women and it was like a like they were marketing very heavily and that they had a spa sure and so she was like this is a hotel where like this is catered to women like this could happen again and um like in vulnerable positions

like a spa at a spa and so surprisingly she actually said that um a month later police did call her and say that they had caught those guys and arrested them so thank god but they had tried they were trying to do it again to another woman that was there for a christmas party jesus so who are these fucking hooligan i don't know who they are where they are now but that was her let's hope they're about that locked right up but she says that was one of the scariest things that are breaking the door like actually successfully breaking the phone that's like true nightmare yeah yeah um oh god so the next paranormal story is about jesus i think we could like use some jesus right now after that story so my mom was still on her search for god because apparently like what already was going on nothing convinces her

and so she my mom also like if there's nothing my mom loves more than me or a glass of wine it's Tony Robbins oh I didn't know this about your mother my mother like has passed like the master university or whatever it is my mom met your mom one time and was like she's really into Tony Robbins my mom is obsessed with Tony Robbins like pretty sure if Tony Robbins was ever available she would have married him oh my god um so she loves tony robbins she made me go to a seminar of his i no comment um but tony robbins i'm wondering how this ties into jesus by the way i'm like oh because she thinks tony robbins is jesus obviously i thought we were going um no my mom loves her empowerment and her life coaches and tony robbins is just the man fit for

her and she's doing great so it's working you know what I'm pretty sure at this point she's gone to enough Tony Robbins meetings that like Tony Robbins knows her like I probably like she's been going she's also not a wallflower she's like oh she's not at all right and she's like done the fire walk a bunch of times and the pole jump and all that she's very into it um anyway on her quest for god she was at a tony robbins meeting because where else do you go um that man does it all and so he had a specific conference uh called date with destiny which apparently is one of the more luxurious events he hosts oh my and at one point in the seminar tony robbins did this thing where in hindsight

it was some sort of hypnotism uh that's the best my mom can call it, where you have to think about, um, basically he has you thinking about very like small things about like trying to get you like to totally like tunnel vision in and focus on small things. So I was like, think about your hand. Think about your foot. Think about your hand when you were five. What did it look like? What did it think about your foot when you were five? Now think about it when you were seven when you were nine think about like uh when you were little what was a happy experience when you were little think about like when you felt most loved what you were most proud of and my mom for some reason like could not think of anything and so she had like a mental breakdown in the middle of the seminar and um my god everyone was like thinking of happy moments

and she was just crying her eyes out and apparently like hyperventilating where she was like her exact words were wiping the snot off of her face. My mom had a past. She is a strong woman, but she could not remember anything really good in that in that moment. At least like she definitely has had good moments. She just can't remember any. I mean, there's like a lot of pressure on you at this point. At least at one point discovered ice cream, like she's okay. There was a highlight somewhere in there. Um, got it. And so she was having to think of all these like

really specific things. And, um, she remembers being told to think about the pressure on her feet, releasing from the ground and then pressing her feet into the ground, releasing it again, just a lot of breathing exercises. And he was giving this guided meditation about a place that had any impact for you. And basically an animal guide was going to come find you. Right. So her animal was a bird and the bird grabbed her and took her to Rio at Christ the Redeemer. The statue.

The statue. Yeah. It's a basically apparently it's she said it's a statue of jesus the size of like the statue of liberty and his arms are out it's like very iconic white statue i think i've seen it before i've just i've never been i've never been either but so in her like hypnotic state of just like crying and thinking that nobody loves her and she can't think of a moment where she was proud and this this bird took her to Rio at the statue. Had she been there? She had been there.

But like, I don't I can't imagine she went to that place and it like religiously impacted. I mean, she's clearly like does not know where she is on a spiritual level in this place in her life. And so it like brought her to that spot. And she was crying because she felt like nobody ever loved her in her childhood. And all of a sudden, this statue came alive. Huh? felt like nobody ever loved her in her childhood. And all of a sudden this statue came alive and Jesus hugged her and held her and talked to her and told her that she was never alone. He's always been there. And she was so worthy of love. And she still says, even on the phone today,

when I asked her about this, she said it's the most loved she's ever felt in her entire life. She's never felt a hug or being held so strongly ever since. Oh my God. She says that she tries to remember the feeling all the time. She remembers the joy and the, she says the joy, the content, the love. I still think about it at night and I'm convinced God was speaking to me. But, and she was like, she said, even though I was crying my eyes out and everyone else was having a really happy experience, I'm the only one that got hugged by Jesus. So there. So there, Tony Robbins.

That is a great story. But so and for those things to happen to someone who like still isn't like a devout anything, it's very interesting. It's like affirming almost like you don't need to know what you're doing. She's like, he's got it. Someone's got it. So then my last story is the one that I have mentioned before, the DC sniper. Right. Which my mom was almost a victim of.

Hoping we'd get to this story. Well, hope no more. So my mom was prefacing the whole DC sniper with like asking if I remember anything, because her memory of like when she realized that the dc sniper was a big deal and i had been hearing about it at school i was 10 right um she knew that it was a really serious thing when apparently the grocery store that we would always go to one time we went after school and she told me that i had to lock all the doors when she got out of the car and i had to hide under the glove compartment and she remembers me asking to borrow her cell phone so I could call the police in case I saw her get shot which I don't remember but I do remember that time I remember like me and I remember my friend Cole um I was with him one night and I remember his mom like told all of us in the car like we have

to run into the store but when we get out just run don't look back great oh my god and so like i remember little things like that but i remember being in ohio and being scared and like i was not even in the vicinity so i can't imagine and uh and i remember that whole year they had like black paper up on all the windows in the schools and like all of our pe classes had to be done in our actual classroom so i remember that whole year we just had jumping jacks like by our desks like just so we would have pe but we weren't allowed to leave and then we had um a lot of our teachers were ex-military right and so usually we would go outside and do carpool at the end of every day we were all in our rooms and like military teacher by military teacher would like this is terrifying be a wall and like have us like run to the cars and do you remember anything

eva because you were in virginia too you know i was just thinking i think we were i do remember it and i just think we were so sorry someone yelled at us for not for not having a microphone for you i i definitely remember the that time frame and i think we were not that we were that we weren't worried about it but that we were so far out in the country that we had less fear i think it was less like direct yeah yeah because we had i mean our the places we went were like such small like country stores too but a lot of the times too i mean we definitely had big parking lots and things like that too but most of the time we were going to like on dirt roads still stores so i don't think we had that like same direct but

i definitely remember watching what was happening and being like oh my god this is so close i feel like yeah and being that age of like you're, this is so close. I feel like, yeah, and being that age of, like, you're, like, learning about, oh, shit, really terrible shit. It's like, oh, death exists, and this is how it happens to people who don't deserve it. Right. And so I remember that. And it was also, Fredericksburg was a specifically scary area because we are right between D.C. and Richmond. So we're usually, like, a hot spot. Like, we're right off the highway.

Right. So usually if things are happening in D.C., if they're going to happen in Richmond, they happen in Fredericksburg first. It's like a hotspot, like we're right off the highway. Right. So usually if things are happening in DC, if they're going to happen in Richmond, they happen in Fredericksburg first. Like it's like a trans. Yeah. It's like a lot of like, um, like a lot of drugs come through Fredericksburg to go between the two cities and stuff like that. So, and sex trafficking is a big thing.

Yeah. But yeah, so we were right next to the highway. So that was just something that people were really concerned about. But, um, all that being said, my mom's story with it is that, Oh, right. I'm like already scared. I'm like, we haven't talked about Linda yet. So, um, there was, uh, my mom, her territory, she's a financial advisor. I'm not going to say where, but that's her job where she covers a lot of territory and travels a whole lot. And she travels specifically in the DMV, the DC Maryland, Virginia area, um, which is exactly where this guy was. It was also his territory apparently. And so, um, my mom's situation with it was that she dropped me off at school one morning and

right across the street, like maybe not like two streets down across the street, like still within like basically view of the school. There is a gas station and there were two cars in front of her. It was like obviously morning rush. So people were waiting to their turns to get into the, for the gas. My mother, because she was Linda, um, was in a hot pink pantsuit. I like how we've gotten like little snippets of like, she's wearing a hot pants. Like she's wearing super short shorts. She's wearing a red coat. She's also, she like literally just had like the dispatch do like a tequila shut off for

the night before the police party. I mean like, and I imagine what was a crop top. I mean, I just like everything she did was just like growing into another twinkle into another twinkle of what would become this podcast. Like she just had a child to report all of this to everyone else molding us before we ever knew yeah she had no idea but also she was forming a child with quite a fair past past fair point so she was uh waiting in line to get her gas at the um at the gas station obviously not the grocery store thank you um and she was checking her voicemail and she got a call from one of her clients. I'm

just gonna say his first name was Bobby. And usually Bobby was a, like really chill, nice guy. But on this particular day, even though it never happens, he was pissed off. And so my mom was really paranoid and was like, I need to call him like, I'll just get gas later. Like I can't, I can't handle this. I got to go go and so she went to she was like maybe she was late for the meeting or something like that but she frantically was just like compelled like oh i can't handle this i need to get on the phone with him and get to work priorities so she was the next in line for the car for the gas she was waiting for that last car to fill up even though that car was done with their gas she backed out and she pulled over so

she was still on the parking lot but she like pulled over by the corner right where she could like check her phone for bobby's number right and so she was still on the lot and saw what happened and basically as she backed away another car came onto the lot and pulled in to the gas like where she was before to the to the pump where she was going to be at right because now that that previous guy had driven off it was now available she backed away yeah so someone took her place and got out of his car and went to pump tank and that was the guy that got shot and holy fuck and her reasoning for why like it was going to be hers because she was in a hot pink pantsuit and she was like that's an easy target and she was like this guy was setting up to be able to shoot me i got away like i drove away

five feet and this guy came in and his gun was probably already set up so he just wait so it happened while she was there yeah so she saw it happen holy because she was still she only backed away and then pulled over and then this guy literally just happened moments later yeah and so it would have been her what was that like like did she have to stay there too and yeah so she had to uh this is that's horrifying dude yeah that's and i mean i don't even know what it would my mom's like she's a very emotional person in some ways and then like i guess when things are like too hard to handle she just like doesn't think about them she like compartmentalizes too well i think my mom's still and so i feel like i could have asked her like what did it feel like to know that that could

have been you and i think she just doesn't let herself think about it yeah so um so the guy took her spot he got shot and then the thing that she actually remembers the most is as soon as it happened she already had her phone out she was about to call someone she called my school to be like hey someone literally just got killed and from the sniper like two blocks away from this from the school and they said oh yeah we already know we're in lockdown and she's like how do you fucking know i literally just watched the guy die like there's no better source than me how is the school already under lockdown so that was like that's her biggest memory of it is just like impressed that the school was on top of shit yeah seriously um so she basically had to wait as a witness and every witness had to stand at least

10 feet away from each other in different circles because they didn't want anyone's stories crossing oh um so she and she actually is one of the only people who ever saw the actual car because at that point in the dc sniper timeline they were still looking for an unmarked van like a white van oh and she's one of the only people who ever saw the cranberry car with old-fashioned hand lights holy shit and she was actually on the original witness list but she never got called um dude probably and probably because she my mom has like no vision left like she's like got really fucked up eyes. And so, um, they probably like just realized that her vision was not well.

And so like her testimony probably wasn't great. Um, but so she's one of the only people who remembers the car and she remembers because she used to, um, one of the things, one of the companies she invested in was like a company that leased out trucks and ships and things like that. And so a lot of their cars would always be parked out front, right in that area. Yeah. And so she always drove by and just saw what cars were sitting out there. And that car was sitting, that car had never been there before.

And she was like, that car doesn't fit. It doesn't fit in with the rest. Yeah. And so I don't think she actually said anything to the cops. I think she just kind of felt like, oh, they must have put a new car on the lot. Wow. But she's one of the only people who remembers seeing the actual car holy shit dude so all of that is why my mom drinks and why i drink now and why eva drinks oh my god those are great stories though yes i'm sorry it went long no it's good it's it was like a variety too

i feel like like we didn't you really like spice it up listen happy halloween i mean it's very scary all of it was very scary okay we're back i will say real quick that um it's really hard to pee in this onesie and imagine do anything apparently hold anything hold an object thank you eva um i went and got these. So Blaze's dad and mom threw this, like, beautiful rehearsal dinner, and they got us these as, like, kind of a joke, like a kitschy. They had a table full of these, like, Tervis Tumbler wine glasses. They're super cute. They're like, it's for Christine's love of wine. And then they had Blaze's favorite gummies in them,

and everything was going super great until my stepmother decided to give a a rehearsal dinner speech i didn't know if we were talking about this i just thought i'd throw it out there because we didn't mention in the beginning and now that i have these glasses in front of me it all came rushing back okay i was intentionally avoiding it in case you did not want to talk about it but okay let's go listen we're talking about like extra mother figures in our lives and i feel like we're talking about scary things it was a little scary very scary so everyone was a little scared she shows up i mean i know she doesn't listen to this far in i don't think okay great she shows up with her dress completely unzipped and it's like um oh she has a mink throw on like a mink fur coat situation she walks in are the ones that zipped her up oh i know

so she walks in she walks over to alice and says hello and fucking rips her mink coat off. And it's like, am I zipped? And Allison is like, oh, no, no, you're not. All the way down to the booty. To the bum. And then, so Allison zipped her up. We're at the rehearsal dinner. I haven't even told you this. So we have this, first of all, my mom shows up in this giant handbag with apparently 45

framed photos of me, just different ones that she gathered from the house. Yes. And she walked around her house with this giant purse and just like dumped photos of me and and then went to blaze's parents rehearsal dinner that they had set up and put photos of me all over the room like not blaze like me as a five-year-old just random household framed portraits of you dusty framed photos of me all over the place and i'm like okay whatever you know it's a sweet sentiment she gives her like speech and it's written on a legal pad. She calls me her living doll twice, which really made everyone a little uncomfortable

twice. She'd never done that before the whole time. You, you tell your part first and then I'll give like the audience opinion. Don't you worry. So, I mean, and I saw everybody and I was like, and poor blazes parents have never met her before. And I'm like, oh great. So she's giving the speech, calls me a living doll living doll I'm like this is not a shocker to anybody

she's just weird and then um at the end of the speech she gives a toast and I'm like okay I wasn't terrible she and she had asked for a second glass of wine and I'm like that's weird because she has two glasses of wine I'm like it's not that weird but it's like she's about to give her speech and she's like excuse me waiter I need another glass of wine so she's like two full glasses i'm like that's odd so she's giving her speech she says toast cheers whatever throws i mean like literally throws her head back and like faces this glass like linda at a police party yeah just i mean picture it picture it fucking faces this ball of wine turns around and hurls the glass into the granite staircase behind her and just shatters everywhere and the whole place just goes fucking quiet and you hear renee

go ah shit and i was like and then of course i jump up and i go i'll clean it and everyone's like christine sit down and she says i thought everyone would get more excited and i was like what the fuck is happening and then the server comes over first of all she's a real bitch and she walks over and she looks at me and she's like i have never seen anything like this and i was like i didn't do it lady and she goes to my stepmother like what were you thinking and my stepmom goes oh it's family tradition and i was like no no no i don't know what family that's not ours so anyway it was quite an experience i just wanted to throw that out there. Now you can tell your side. Um, my side is I had never met your stepmom, but I was prepared. I'd heard some stories where I was like, Oh, she's, she's a little different. That's fine. And so

also I'm from like a wildly like dysfunctional family in many ways. And so I was like, this is nothing I've never seen before. Sure. And so I met her and, um, I forgot about the mink part, but yeah, she was doing that. She had that. And then she asked us to zip her up. I made Allison zip her up. I was like, I don't want to be a part of that. I tried to help her with the pictures. She was very actively against me assisting her at all.

She was like, this is my job. And I was like, OK, sure. You can. OK. It's your job that no one assigned. Yeah. I was like, I don't have to help. That's fine.

You can. Okay. It's your job that no one assigned. Yeah. I was like, I don't have to help. That's fine. And so then we all, I was sitting down at a table with all the Christine's like hometown friends and who had met at the bachelorette party. And I feel like I'd met, I'd met Renee before and I was with Lisa and Zandy and Allie.

And so we were all together. And at first, like we were all kind of laughing cause we all thought like, oh, she's like being her quirky self. Yeah. I like, I didn't think there was any harm to all thought like, oh, she's like being her quirky self. Yeah. I like I didn't think there was any harm to it. And then like she called you a living doll. And in my head, I was like, oh, that's like definitely an inside joke. And I just don't get it.

Later, I found out there was. I mean, it is now. Now it is. Which I am a part of. Right. But I just remember being like, this is just something I don't understand. But I'll like I'll chuckle along because like obviously someone gets it but no one got it everyone was apparently laughing out of like just very strange i was like i've known you for 21 years and like well my favorite part was

she also she didn't know how to pronounce your name and she was like she was like oh i'm christina's christina's uh stepmother oh but i don't is it Christine or Christina and I said she was saying it out loud to people and I was like listen if you don't know by 20 years this is not the moment to be fair my family all calls me Christina and I think sometimes she's like I don't know what to call you in front of other people and I'm like call me Christina you literally that's what you call me like that's well from the audience view we were like this is I don't even hear that opposite reason this is the exact opposite day to like in in the middle of a speech to figure out what the name is. And then we were like, oh, that was kind of funny.

The living doll thing. We're like, oh, that was kind of funny. And then she like did the cheers thing where like every because I don't drink. I got the best view of the whole house where like my head wasn't tilted back sipping in a cheers. I was watching her and she like literally faced this whole glass, like said and then she actually like kind of charged at the yeah she took a running step like a step and then she like threw with all her might and the whole thing shattered and that was when all of us were like oh it's not funny anymore we're like oh no do you know who the only other person who had a better view than you was the videographer who i happened to hire

and i was thinking why did i do that there's no reason i hired a videographer who I happened to hire. And I was thinking, why did I do that? There's no reason I hired a videographer. Like, and you're like, Oh yeah, there was a reason. I was like, there are a couple of speeches. Like it was fine. You know, my dad, like Blaze's dad said a really sweet speech and it was like fine. And then the guy was like, well, I'm just going to, cause he's like, I don't really, people don't like themselves being taped eating. And I was like, okay, fair. So we just kind of hung out and I was like, damn know like there's no reason I paid extra for this and then that happened and his eyes just you're like worth every penny his eyes literally lit up and I was like tell me and he's like don't worry and then he played in slow-mo for me like four times and he's like I have a whole plan for this clip

and I was like and he goes wow and he like stayed long because he's like this is a riot and he's like I wish I could go to the wedding tomorrow. And I was like, OK, that's actually kind of a nice compliment. I think. I don't know. I mean, like truly, if if that's the worst thing that happened at your wedding, you had a great wedding. Yeah. I mean, right.

And it's at least it's a story. And then at the end, my favorite part was before she walked off, she went tradition and then just walked off. She's like, oh, it's family tradition. And I'm like, who are you telling that to? Anyway. But before I know you're not going to be you're too humble to say anything but christine did a very nice thing at the rehearsal

dinner where she had remembered at the cake tasting that blaze had a very specific interest in an amaretto cake right and that ended up not being their wedding cake flavor but she remembered that blaze just went fucking bananas for this cake and so at the rehearsal dinner christine made an effort to already have an amaretto cake designed for blaze and presented to his family at the rehearsal dinner it was yankees and they all got there was a baseball on top of it and we tried to eat it by the way it was styrofoam so oh yikes heads up heads up but no she i know she won't actually say that on her own, but it was very cute and very well thought out. Well, thank you.

That's very kind. And thank you to Renee for going to the bakery and the hotel and screaming at everyone for me when things weren't quite going as planned. And they worked out great. So thank you, guys. Oh, yeah, that was fun. I forgot about that. It was a little overshadowed by my stepmom, but what is it? That's my life.

It's our lives. When you have an extra mother. Sometimes things go their way. I have an extra mother and two extra fathers, if you're counting all the past ones. Yeah. I am. It's fun. Dysfunction is fun.

That's why fun's in the word. That's why Em and I have a podcast. Okay. Anyway, the end. Moving on. That was my Halloween story. story it was quite scary yeah okay i actually do have a halloweeny story for you guys today okay these cobwebs are gonna be the end of us my laptop is wrapped in fake spider webs hold on for one moment okay so this sorry my

wine is in the way it's okay um when isn't it? Fair. So this is a theme. I did something different, too, where I, like, picked, like, different stories and made, like, a little montage. Love it. A little melee, if you will. This is a series of Ouija board-related murders. Yeah! So there were a lot. And I was, like, oh, at first I first i was like taking all of the stories down and

then it got so long that i was like holy shit i have to like hand select stories because there were so many which is deeply disturbing but yes let's begin so these two stories i got from one of my favorite websites mysteriousuniverse.org just a fun time uh weird shit on there it's great so this is an article by brett sponsor and i'm gonna read two excerpts not i mean i'm gonna read them but i'm gonna relay two i hear you two stories that he told in the article okay so first story on november 8th 1933 a woman named dorothea irene turley and her 15 year old daughter maddie who lived in prescott arizona decided to play with their ouija board is it Ouija or Ouija?

I'm sure it's, I actually, I've been told that it's, um, I don't know how to say it. I just, I just say Ouija board, which I'm sure is not accurate. So, cause we, isn't it like we and yeah, like German and French. Yes. Yeah. I think that's what I'm trying to say, but I don't remember words. I think there's some, there's some way that no one actually pronounces it that is the correct way to say it. I'd say Ouija board.

Well, then we're absolutely not going to say it that way. Okay, great. Cool. So, Dorothea was reportedly a regular user of her board and a firm believer in it. She consulted it for a wide variety of purposes in her life, including financial advice. She tried to find buried gold with it. She's using it for all the right reasons. All the right reasons.

And so during the session with her daughter, at one point, the planchette hovers over the board and spells out instructions for Maddie, the 15-year-old, to kill her father when he's finished milking the cows. So Dorothea is like oh well you gotta do it and the daughter's like no clearly she was looking for a way out of that relationship wasn't she seriously she's like well the board says she's like shoving the plane shut like kill um and she's like apparently she said to her daughter quote the board could not be denied

so well clearly how do you argue with that i don't know so the board actually reassured them that no one would find out about the board was like your mom's right no one will find out don't worry i won't tell i promise like you secret is safe with me so the two even allegedly went as far as to contact the spirit uh with cards they were like well maybe if we contact them with like tarot cards but the spirit confirmed that yes he wanted them to kill her father so when ernest turley the father comes in for milking the cows maddie takes the shotgun and blasts her father two times in the back blast as he's doing chores and he didn't die right away which is just very upsetting he died two weeks later at the hospital.

And the mother and daughter pair were arrested for the crime, and Maddie claimed it was all an accident. She said she was walking around 30 feet behind her father when she tripped and the gun went off, but authorities were not even a little bit convinced because he had been shot in the same spot twice in the back. Oh, yikes. Like, very close range, so that did not fly with them.

So Maddie finally buckled. She confessed that the board had ordered her to do it and that she could not resist its dark power. Dorothea was also arrested. And then it came out that she had actually wanted her husband dead because she was having an affair with another man. There it is. So she did want out of that relationship. Yeah. So you caught that real quick.

And also, like, leave your fucking daughter out of it. What the hell? I know. Just kill him yourself. No. Well, but I mean, don't make your 15-year-old do it. Like, truly. Like, well, the board made you do it.

Not me. Like, what? Anyway. That's just extra manipulation on top of an already horrible situation. Exactly. So in the end, Maddie, the 15-year-old old was sentenced to a state reformatory school for attempted murder oh my goodness i know and she was paroled i mean she did shoot him twice you know but yeah received parole three years later and dorothea was convicted of assault with intent

to commit murder yeah she like even knew she wasn't gonna get in trouble for murder because she made her daughter do it so fucked up um with intent to commit murder for which she got a 15 year to life sentence but it was overturned a couple years later by the arizona supreme court and she was freed end of story end of story twisted by the way these are like some of the light-hearted ones like there's something there where i was like whoa really yeah there's somewhere it got like real messed up and then like racism came into play. Oh, no. Like just like really dark, deep topics where I was like, this is going to be, this has

to be like its own episode. Okay. So fast forward to 2001. On the night of February 11th, 53-year-old Carol Sue L. Baker is using a Ouija board with her daughter, Tammy Roach, along with her two granddaughters, age 15 and 11, at their home in minko oklahoma carol sue apparently receives a message from the board that her daughter tammy's husband 34 year old former mayor of minko brian roach was corrupted by evil and had to die

a lot of scorned women it seems so far like these guys are minding their own business you know and then it's like he's fully i hope allison doesn't use a ouija board is this what you're always telling me not to i think so i just don't want allison near it at the same time as you m is corrupted by evil the order was apparently so compelling that the woman fetched a knife went to the room where brian was napping and stabbed him in the chest how compelling can you be when it takes like 10 seconds to do a letter by letter sentence? Although, you know, when you do play Ouija board and it's like building up to a word and you're like,

oh no, like it's spelling the word. Thank God ours has never said kill. It's like K-I. Ours just literally spells gin. Gin, yeah. It's like, I like dogs and gin. I have a dog named Gabe and I like gin. Oh, yeah.

It's like, what else do you like? Whiskey. Yes. Okay. Alcohol. Yeah, we get it. We get it. Sorry, I needed a sip. have a dog named gabe and i like jen oh yeah it's like what else do you like whiskey yes like okay alcohol yeah we get it we get it i'm sorry i need a sip oh eva if you want some wine feel free sorry i brought this for you just in case i'm such an ass i like didn't even no actually the lid is super cool because it has a little like oh an open close yeah it's like a little sippy cup jesus blaze's dad uh described them as almost turbos.

Because they're like off-brand. Do you have any more of the blue ones? No, these were actually the only ones left. And like, I didn't get any. So we went like digging for some. So I was like, I want one. And Blaze didn't get one either. Because like, we were busy.

That's so fun. You know, aren't they kind of cute? Oh, sorry. Should I? Oh, yes. Finish it, please. Don't worry. I brought another one it's come on this isn't this isn't your first time here amateur hour also i bought this because people remember i posted the bottle on instagram or something and everyone was like have you tried

the dark one and it looked kind of creepy so i bought it is it good i have no idea oh we're gonna find it i like it it's really it's a lot more intense oh is it but it is good a lot more intense what the hell does that mean like more bitter more sweet it's just more like um like uh i don't know a stronger flavor yeah more robust robust there it is i mean i'm a connoisseur i know i'm linda's child i like know what's going on you it's like in your bones whether you like it or not. Like just through osmosis, I kind of know what it tastes like. Like, mm, oaky. You can just look at me and be like, not my thing.

Yeah. Too oaky for me. Okay. So, blah, blah, blah, blah. Sorry. I had to get Eva some wine. Wow. Somehow I forgot to offer it.

Somehow it just slid right down my gullet. Too busy drinking it to offer it somehow it just slid right down my gullet too busy drinking it to offer it to anyone else okay even now you down that and then run over to a marble staircase and just shatter this is why wait it actually is really fortuitous that they brought plastic tumbler wine glasses and my stepmom fucking smashed the restaurant's glass one they were probably like great glad we equipped her with a plastic one should have given it to her five minutes earlier oh by the way at dinner at the fucking wedding we're getting served our dinner my dad is giving a toast and i just see this glass shatter on the ground and i look up

and my stepmother is sitting there and she goes i just see her mouthing words because she's too far away and i just see her go it wasn't on purpose i swear and i'm like how many fucking glasses of course it was on purpose it's's family tradition, you living doll. Yeah, you living doll. You got to stick to your guns if you're going to say it's a tradition. Anyway. Okay. So let's move on here. Okay.

So she gets the knife. She stabs him in the chest and the others just stand there and watch as he bleeds to death. Oh, kind of like how people just like watch glasses shatter. Yeah. And just quiet down and don't react. Did like the killer then say tradition. It's family tradition. You wouldn't understand. uh sorry i don't want to overplay that i just it was just a perfect timing a perfect time to make a joke about him not being a living doll

anymore but that's too much i think maybe i don't know oh it makes you cringe but it was also well well well wet do you like when i say i was going to say a joke to like test it out without getting the brunt of like i mean you'll probably hear everyone else across america go oh anyway brian was no longer their living doll uh he bled out unfortunately and passed away but apparently brian's death was not enough to satisfy carol sue's bloodlust because then she decided to turn the knife on her own 10 year old granddaughter frantically trying to kill the girl before tammy her daughter managed to stop her and get the knife away oh no then all of them all four of them so grandma mom and two kids 15 and 10

get in the car and drive off tammy is hoping to help her mother like escape from the crime and is like what the fuck are you doing mom like why would you get in a car with that woman i know that's what i'm saying she's gonna attack your daughter like your 10 year old yeah let's enclose ourselves at top speed so guess who's driving grandma yep so grandma's driving and she intentionally plows into a signpost in an attempt to kill everyone in the car because now she's convinced that they all need to die when that didn't work she carol sue who had suffered two broken ankles in the crash tried to shove her 15 year old granddaughter into oncoming traffic and that also didn't work so she hobbled off with her broken ankles into the woods nearby stripping all her clothes off as she went then law enforcement arrived and they were like what the fuck is going

on like nobody this is literally the scene they walked onto right and they were like it's family tradition yeah listen grandma has her way that's fine she okay so she's caught she's wandering through the woods naked right so she's caught um charged with first degree murder in the death of her son-in-law sentenced to time at a psychiatric hospital and then tammy was convicted of being an accessory to murder but that was dropped later okay and then in the aftermath authorities like looked into carol sue she had no history of mental illness or strange behavior no sign of drugs no alcohol uh no substance no history of substance abuse they no sign of domestic problems like none of them disagreed even or like didn't get along with each other it was like otherwise a really happy

household and so there was literally no strange like just the lip and many of us overcame the board like there was nothing weird in the so they don't know what happened they still don't know it was never figured out what was like a possession like what came over her yeah but she's weird claimed basically from the beginning to the end that like the board made her do it um assistant district attorney brett burns in the county would later say quote it's amazing how the grandmother was able to let this ouija board consume her life so i think basically they just think she got so wrapped up in like believing it that when it gave her this like command she just was like well that's what i have to do and like there's no other explanation so that's the second story now we're gonna take a little side road into a different territory of ouija

board murder oh okay did you know there were so many sides of ouija board murder because i did not i didn't either yep so we're traveling back to 1994. Oh, good. And at this point, Stephen Young, a 35-year-old insurance broker, was on trial, so the murder has already happened. He's on trial for the death of Harry and Nicola Fuller, who had been found dead on the floor of their home a year earlier. Nicola had been shot three times, and Harry was shot in the back at close range.

So there's, like, this brutal murder that this guy, Steven Young is on trial for the jury. Here's the case. And then they go to the hotel where they're staying. And as the other jurors slept, four of the jurors grouped together around a homemade Ouija board that they had made from a piece of paper and a hotel room, wine glass. This is literally us on tour trying to like talk to ghosts.

Come completely. It is. I was like, Oh, Oh, getting me tips, getting me me tips except a little more fucked up because they decided to try and contact the murder the souls of the murdered victims oh that had been you know shot the year before gotcha so one juror named ray um took charge

of addressing the spirit and it identified itself as harry fuller the the man who had been shot ray asked who killed you and the glass spelled out stephen young done it oh specific yeah he said facebook he said how well the guy's on trial stephen oh and it's 94 well so i guess neither way it's gonna work also that but i mean stephen young's literally the one that they're on trial that's they're the jury for. Yeah. Right. So they said the glass said Stephen Young done it. And then Ray said, how? And the glass spelled shot.

So the jurors were like, what do we do? What do we do? And then the glass apparently spelled out vote guilty tomorrow. So by the end of the seance, some of the jurors were crying. If you were like, shit, we like really went too far. This was inappropriate. And then what they ended up doing was going to their rooms and agreeing not to tell anybody else including the other jurors what they had done but a few weeks later a headline emerged in international papers across the world that read murder juries ouija board verdict and people were fucking furious yeah it just sounds like someone planted. It's horrifying.

Just chose to tell everyone that. Wait, what do you mean? Like it's, I would imagine like someone using a Ouija board, like just spelt that out. Just hoping other people would be freaked out. Yeah. I mean, I think people were pissed. Like, why are they using a Ouija? This isn't a joke.

That's fair. But my first thought is like, oh, it's a, it's a trap. I don't know. I mean, the guy was guilty anyway. Like, I don't think there was really a question whether he had yeah uh yeah i mean i don't know i don't know people were just pissed because it's like this was one of the most high profile trials like in the world involved and then these jurors like make it kind of a tabloid headline i don't know um so the case ended up being one of the most high profile examples of juror misbehavior in

the world i read a really interesting bit about like juror misbehavior which apparently is like very common like one time they found out during a like high profile trial half the jurors were playing sudoku like they had all shared like their sudoku book and we're all like doing sudoku while this guy was talking about like somebody's murder or something like people i don't know apparently shit goes down with these juries and actually this jury that used the ouija board was already the second jury because the first set had been replaced because they had been played a tape of the emergency call that nicola fuller had made between being shot like she got shot and then she called 9-1-1 yeah um and they played that like tape and it's like deeply gruesome and upsetting and i

guess they the jury only lasted one day before one of them was like i can't do this anymore so they already had to like basically retrial the whole thing gotcha so the judge asked for an entire new jury after that um and the problem with juror misbehavior is apparently it's really harmful and costly especially with like a high profile traumatic case like this one because you have to do a whole retrial and so that puts everyone including like the judge the staff the accused um witnesses jurors like the families through like they just have to start the entire process over again so like it's expensive and it's also like re-traumatizing everyone so basically they'd already replaced the whole jury and started over and then right as they're like finishing up the trial they find out that these jurors are like fucking using ouija boards and like trying to contact

spirits and you know whatever so they had to start the whole thing over again for the third time which was just really messy um and in the end stephen young either way was given two life sentences for the murder of harriet and nicola fuller kind of upsetting nicola fuller's father said the ouija jurors made a complete joke of our daughter's death, which is just devastating. Um, but one author actually speculated that the jurors weren't trying to play

games. They were simply trying to find a way to cope with the gruesome ordeal they were being faced with. So who's to say what their like motivations were, but either way, like they done fucked up. Right. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And finally, this one is a story i found a long time ago and i had it bookmarked and i was trying to find a way to tell the story and it was too short to like use as an episode and i thought this was the perfect way to do it um it is a story of a ouija board being used to convict a murderer yeah from atlasobscura.com my favorite that's my favorite website really yeah oh good

and mine's mysterious universe we just combined our yeah our face okay so this takes place in greenbrier county west virginia in 1897 um january 23rd 1897 a man named erasmus trout shoe who worked at the local blacksmith shop sent a boy from the shop to his home to check if his wife Zona needed anything from the store. So the boy runs on his errand to Erasmus' house, and when he gets there, he finds Erasmus' wife, Zona, dead on the floor of their home. And he's like, fuck. So he runs. I mean, maybe not, but. Can you imagine a little boy?

Fuck. What did they say in 1897? Oh. You think of that in 1897? Oh. You think of that while I drink my wine. I have no idea what they would say back then. Probably something more godly. I mean, to be honest, I just picture the word fuck, but like with those like gothic letters. You know?

Like old timey, old English. Like SpongeBob starting his essay. Yes! Yes. Just F. F. So the boy runs back to the blacksmith shop and is like fuck you're what fuck your wife is dead and okay so this is where i was a little confused with the story because

they changed erasmus to eddie i don't know if that's like his nickname or what because they didn't specify but i'm just gonna call him eddie because it's a lot easier than saying erasmus's every five seconds so i assume that's his nickname. So a doctor is notified. Eddie grabs his wife's body, carries her upstairs to their bed, like holds on to her, is like grieving, never leaves her side. The doctor doesn't have time to do a full autopsy for whatever God knows what reason. So he does a hasty autopsy, which hasty and autopsy are not two words I imagine should go together.

If I were to ever have an autopsy done on myself, would hope the exact opposite of it the exact i do not want to be hasty hasty a very unhasty autopsy yes right so they do a hasty autopsy and they determine now get this i can't determine zona's cause of death to be quote everlasting faint everlasting faint it just like just fallen over and can't get up it's just that bullshit of like oh women are just hysterical and she just was so hysterical she died well sometimes people think that's gonna happen that will maybe be my obituary but doesn't matter this isn't about me sometimes i feel so hysterical i'm gonna die it's okay so everlasting faint now i know what to call it next time it happens to me right everlast i'm sorry i'm i'm suffering from everlasting faint right now guys it's

gonna be wild i actually really appreciate it if you were a little more conscientious and aware of um like disease i'm going through oh my condition uh-huh yeah uh-huh of what faint something everlasting everlasting faint yeah okay i'll try to be more i'll try to educate you but like it's really not my job there's only so much we can do at this point so if i don't know it by now i just probably don't want to know it like maybe maybe so zona's body is transferred to her parents home about five miles away eddie has dressed her in what he said was her favorite dress beautiful high neckline gown and he complimented this gown with her favorite scarf wow fashionista wow i was like this is a very specific detail um during the entire

viewing before her burial eddie held his wife's head sobbing zona's mother mary is like something is fucking going on with eddie he's being a bit weird turns out she never trusted him didn't even like that they were getting married like from the beginning was not on board with the relationship but there's nothing she could do zona was buried and zona's mother mary basically after the funeral prayed night after night begging the spirit of her daughter zona to cross back over and speak to her because she was like i have unanswered questions i need you to appear to me and tell me what really happened so she just knew eddie had something to do with zona's death like she could feel it and she had no way of proving it so finally after nights of kneeling and praying zona appeared to her she said eddie did this he crushed my neck he squeezed a life

from me and then this haunting went on for many nights she appeared to her mother every single night and finally mary notified the authorities and she was apparently so like convincing that they actually agreed to exhume the body and do a full autopsy on the corpse so the local school a full and unhasty this one time unhasty autopsy the local school house this is just like a detail that kind of cracks me up and disturbs me the local school house was emptied of children so that they could perform the autopsy all right kids clear out inside you're doing pe outside yeah i'm just thinking of your sniper story it's like the opposite the local school house was emptied zona's body was carried in and the entire time eddie is screaming you'll never prove i did it and mary's just like did what because like no one has fucking like accused him of anything right he's just like you'll never

prove i did it right he's like already speaking for himself before yeah it's like defending himself and she's like did what so when they performed the autopsy it was confirmed that zona's neck had indeed been broken her throat and her windpipe had been crushed which now it makes sense why you put her in that high neck collar and was like holding her head and sobbing and like wouldn't let anyone near him and around her neck yeah around her neck or head so they found out her windpipe had been crushed and her throat had been crushed so when the case went to trial the defense brought up zona's like ghost sighting and was trying to make her seem insane by being like listen you can't trust this lady's testimony she sees ghosts or she thinks

she sees ghosts but um the jury was so convinced by the story that like it swayed them to believe her because they were like this sounds very convincing that she saw this ghost which after this ouija board story i'm like i mean to be honest it seems like they're very paranormally right inclined inclined um they believed her story and erasmus was sentenced to life in prison where he died only three years later mary never saw her daughter zona's ghost again and nobody else had ever reported seeing her spirit but her body was once again buried and zona is now known as the greenbrier ghost and his her story is the only known case in which the testimony of a ghost helped to convict a murderer that's so much more

information than when i told the story that was like you told this story no you didn't yeah what the fuck no i but i told like shit i don't remember that no probably because my information was so shitty compared to that you like i know any of that i which episode was it a whole episode it was some no it was an episode where i told like multiple Ouija board stories or something. I don't remember. It was a while ago, but I remember Zona and I remember it was like, I remember like my bad. I literally just was no tunnel vision. I was like, this story has been in my bookmarks for two years. I remember though you saying when I told the story, you're like, I've had that bookmark, but no, no, it's fine. Cause like the information I got was such shit

compared to that at the beginning you were like yeah yeah and i was like oh m knows the story not only did you know it apparently that's why i was like oh yeah like because i was like yeah it helped convict a murder no no no but like i didn't know anyone's name the only thing i knew was that a woman found out about her daughter's murder and then they exhumed the body and like it confirmed but i didn't know anyone's name i vaguely remember that i didn't remember i didn't know the neck thing like wearing a high collar or her hugging her i know any of that so how few i live in we did a revisitation it's amazing that we do completely different topics and somehow we still cross like it's like it's like it's meant to be it's like it's fate fated to be together anyway so those are my ouija board murder stories for the week happy

halloween 1.0 1.0 so thank you everybody for listening we have a couple things to say surprise we have something to say um who would have thought um first we recently and by recently we mean last week and it's already out we uh did an episode crossover episode with is this adulting yes mental health comedy podcast our friend steven chris we have both individually been on that show but this was our first time together yeah for their halloween episode so we talked about a whole lot of things we talked about different favorite candies favorite movies we talked about weird halloween costumes we had one of the ones that made an

appearance was uh when i dressed as white trash one year and i went in a white garbage can and my mom literally glued garbage on me um so you know if you want to enjoy that story just barely barely missed the cut for the linda's traumatizing experience one day i'll just do a whole episode maybe for mother's day i'll just like nothing paranormal i'll just tell you all about how my mother raised me and how i came to be oh me too and then that's a scary show um but yeah if you want to if you want to hop on over to is this adulting they're really great we really like them it was so fun and like i felt really honored because they were like well we were doing our halloween episode planning it and we thought oh well they have to be on i was like that's such

an honor that's someone that we were the halloween steven on the show is also one of the many people who have sent christine a dvd copy of hocus pocus correct and i had already watched it by the time it came up in the show so you hear me lying through my teeth saying i'm never gonna watch that and i'd already watched it oh yeah you were you're a sneaky snake i like the blood drained out of my face when he's like well what about hocus pocus and i was like fuck i was hoping this wouldn't come up but well um in my individual episode with them i talked about um 90s kids toys that i was still nostalgic about and i talked about a game boy color in that like purple see-through skeleton color yeah and i always wanted it and my mom would never let me have it because she said it was a boy color haha mom ironic look what you did Linda and so his wife

actually had one they mailed it to me and one of our fan mail videos so they're very good people so please go support them super fun next thing is we have a Facebook live literally right now at three o'clock so please go to that so i think hopefully people will come yeah um so if you're listening to this and i heard right away i saw eva rsp pizza like you better be there because it's gonna be a fucking rager so it's no police party 3 p.m pacific standard time and because we're usually so not prepared i will make sure that we are prepared this time around and our facebook live on november m has a planner on this oh yeah i have a planner now which means we're actually going to be so much better about dates um november's facebook

live is going to be on the 18th so november 18th at 3 p.m sweet pst did we already plan this yes great it was when i frantically called you about the rest of the year oh right um yeah no good times um another thing uh is this the most important news? No, not yet. No. The most important news is happening now. Oh, good. Cool. Okay. So make sure I'm ready for it. Oh, okay. Well, um, I didn't know about these little bucket things, but Eva, I got you a present. Oh, that news. Okay. I have other news. Okay. Also about Eva. I mean, Christina and I both got this for you, but it's in my backpack, so'm gonna claim territory um so well because usually usually on sorry i thought we were approaching a different topic so this is probably really weird and awkward no i don't care uh okay good so usually for

halloween obviously i would get christina present but she's got enough so i'm getting you one so i don't know if you remember these yes a hundred percent like this image it's terrifying so i got we want to traumatize you it's the trilogy of scary stories to read in the dark it was that like series of books that like all of us when we were younger read with the creepy black and white skull on the front do you think that bowling story is in there maybe it's very scary but those were my favorite books i remember in my school there was only like one copy of each book and kids would fight tooth and nail to like get it out of the library and you never could you couldn't like renew it because it was too popular exactly yeah so one of the reasons that

we're giving you that is because we know you like books and we know you like i messed it up i'm sorry go ahead well i don't know what you're missing. Nothing. Okay. Christine, just drink your wine. I'll be quiet. We're giving you your those books because Eva actually has her own podcast where she covers a whole other series of books. That was the big news. I was like, we have big news. But then I forgot that you said we were going to relay from that into the segue, a segue, whatever. Yes. I mean, what isn't a train wreck in our lives but eva the only thing but no eva has her own podcast called paranormal cativity yes you heard that right paranormal cativity and her and her sister cover uh the cat who series by lillian lillian jackson braun

lillian jackson braun you know that one it's and apparently there's more series that will be covered eventually correct do you want to do your own little promo please do please i'm sorry to put you on the spot but you guys first of all i am gonna read all of these and listen to all of these and i'm so excited about it probably in font 20 so i think you can probably get through it pretty fast i'm so excited um yeah we, Julie and I are so excited. My sister and I, we, my mom had read these as when we were kids and we always kind of made fun of them. And then we started reading them and we're like, wait, these are hilarious and great. So we, yeah, we usually drink together and it's kind of like a little book club we have

together. It's super cool and super funny and super cute. And we've carried, obviously the drinking part is carried over very well until that i'm sure obviously i've just seeped my also the i personally the theme song kills me it is great it's such a good theme song but if you guys go listen to it can they find it anywhere yeah it's on almost all of them now i think okay i've yeah per i saw it on itunes earlier so per per a normal cat activity yes it's fucking great yeah and your sister made the icon right the logo yeah she drew the little cat with the book and then I got drunk and learned in quotes photoshop to do the border skill share promo code drink

all right so if you support us then you support Eva and also go follow her on social media it's ew gross with three s's correct thanks guys oh my god no this is so fun i just i love this little like you pour christine a lot of wine we ought to do something for you so uh all right that's it folks i think that's all we have huh yeah happy halloween 1.0 1.0 we don't do anything just one time we need to do multiples right we'll see you for the next one and that's why we drink