And That's Why We Drink - Listener Stories: Vol. 26

Episode Date: March 1, 2019

Happy March, everyone! Did you know that knowledge is power and just because you're dead doesn’t mean your education has to stop? Today we learn that and more from listeners who tell us stories about their Harry Potter loving ghost friends, sibling soul swapping experiences, astral projection and whiskey- infused cemetery night terrors. We also learn about the haunted house of the former Canadian Prime Minister... and that's why we drink!Please consider supporting the companies that support us! Start your free wedding website and get $50 off your registry on Zola when you go to zola.com/wedrink

hello hello fresh fresh oh do you like my song guys we are currently sitting in a brand new same room but different studio different vibe different energy different ambiance i was gonna put the plunger in here but it has we should have put that it has been used oh we'll have to buy we'll have to get a new clean plunger um we are in the same room as usual but apparently christine went on a like seven plus hour binge last night of just cleaning the entire place out and rearranging all of our good stuff and all of our gifts from people and yeah i wanted to make sure everything was finally like on display all the gifts that we got and it looks very nice in here and make it a little more comfortable for everybody so plus we are now no longer using our table and squeaky chairs that's right we are now lounging i know i am on

our our burrow couch that's true yeah we can finally get use out of it yeah and i've got my feet all propped up i feel like i'm just talking amongst the masses you know what's funny is that couch is from borough which was one of our sponsors this table and rug were from my registry and then the chair that i'm ordering is from articles so like all over the place i'm your registry on zola yes sorry i'm zola. Exactly. So all sponsored in one way or another. This room is just, we should on the front of the door, just put hashtag ad for people to just walk right in here. Like a blinking light before you enter.

You have to like sign your life away. But yeah, it looks very nice in here. The ambience is different. And apparently tomorrow we're getting new microphones. We are. I'm finally getting that situated that we've been using these same ones since day one and they have served us well they have they no longer spark joy they no longer thank you okay that's literally where i was going with that they literally we have to thank them and wish them on their way wish them

well send them down the river sticks and hopefully not because i might electrocute us but it's uh yeah it's gonna be cool we have like cool little bendy ones that we can like move around they're not here yet i have not seen them i'm very excited to try them out we've been wanting them for like two years now but if we do sound different than usual it's because we have a very janky setup on trying to use these microphones for one last time it doesn't even matter how much work i put into this stupid room we're gonna like fucking wing it no matter what so usually they are sitting on the table but we don't have that table anymore so we are holding them with our hands yes and you the setup for the microphones is this whole a whole thing yes and so we had to kind of break the microphone apart and now we are

actually holding them to our faces and so if we sound a little off we're sorry but this is a one-time only experience for you jk it'll probably happen again in the future i was gonna say don't don't i'm crossing my fingers about that but yeah um so yeah anyway thank you for tuning in to our listeners episode correct it's march 2019 edition damn we're getting up there man last month was our two whole years of listeners episodes wasn't it right although somebody did point out what that i misnumbered them because like halfway through like around like 14 or 15 or something i there's just one missing uh-oh because i think like we've just been numbering them wrong yeah somehow i mean it doesn't matter what else is new but yeah that being'm definitely too lazy to change it, so.

Sorry. We're sorry. Easter egg of our negligence, if you're paying attention. Easter egg of our negligence. So I will start off. Great. We got six cool stories for you today. Oh, yeah.

Some cool tunes. Smooth and cool jazz. Oh, like caramel. Smooth jazz. You say caramel or caramel? I say caramel or caramel i say caramel me too okay this is titled glistener story probs don't go to a cemetery after having some whiskey don't tell me what to do christine that sounds like it's really focused towards you already angry in the advice category i'm defensive this is uh by jay. Thank you, Jalen. Jalen says, Dear M, Christine, Eva, Junie, and handsome BB boy.

Aw. EBB. His visage is visible in every possible corner of this room. Really? There's not? There's minimally five sets of geo on each wall in this place. There's an oil painting. He must come in here when we're all gone and just wag his tail he did come in here early and rub his face all over the new carpet

so i think that's probably what he does marking his territory anyway i'm sorry go on jalen says is that how you say that visage visage listen don't ask me we both know i say wanton so i always thought it was visage i would say either but it's not spelt like massage it's spelt like visa visage it's like visage it's spelt like visage we could say visage and pretend like it's a pun sure yeah let's do that okay it's definitely here first yeah okay i'm obsessed with your podcast and absolutely love hearing all your stories paranormal true crime and real life oh that's a nice little little tip you just heard a lot of them so you're welcome thanks for all that you do you're welcome now on to the story says jalen i have always been sensitive to spirits for as long as i can remember

when i was nine and my dad suddenly died that night i felt very clearly his hand on mine as i was laying in bed which at first was terrifying but then immediately comforting to know that he was there with me over the years i felt a lot of spirits in numerous places i lived including one in high school that loved to read especially harry potter very cool i like that there's a ghost with taste oh my god it was probably moaning myrtle oh get out uh i would come home from school to find my books in different places with the pages open his favorite happened to be the goblet of fire oh and none of the spirits i encountered scared me until just a few months ago oh before we get into that let's go back to this like bookworm

ghost because i'm down with that especially the harry potter and i love that it doesn't like do like it doesn't taunt you or anything it just kind of right it's like just stealing your books wants to read a book yeah why not and i like that he's like i may be dead but that doesn't mean my education has to stop that's right knowledge is power knowledge is power entertainment is entertainment exactly i mean if i were a ghost i would still be like watching mtv and trash and right i totally do like too that um that uh they can still suspend their belief and believe magic right in the afterlife right anyway go on i like to think that sometimes if i'm watching tv maybe i don't even know the ghost i just happen to you know proximity wise be the one closest to them

like watching the show that they wanted to watch they're like i hear flavor of love over there yeah i'm gonna stop by that's like what's that what's that i hear is that tequila tequila is that kitchen nightmares tequila sorry but also i would absolutely haunt anyone watching that show me too anyway she was the i anyway let's move on really i think i think i want to talk more nope i have things to say that won't be said okay um oh yeah so now there's a ghost that scares jalen okay sure when i moved into my current apartment last year i was stoked to see a spooky cemetery close by and plan to go walk through it sometime um a few months ago i was having a really shitty day and may or may not have had a few whiskeys okay okay we we get it

um it says in parentheses team wine wine, but also M for ever. Oh, great. Thanks. So I'm literally- Four, by the way, the number. Four ever. Yeah. No comment.

May or may not have had a few whiskeys and excitedly decided tonight would be the night. I know you'll think I'm dumb, and I was, but on the way, I sort of invited spirits to meet me there. Listen, Jalen, you had us at harry potter and now we're just not on your side oh no at the cemetery i started walking around and nothing happened for a good long while so i decided to start reading the names on the headstones maybe channel something that way jaylen oh dear you were very bored weren't you um well two or three headstones in and my empathy kicked in to goddamn overdrive.

So I started sobbing as I'm reading about all these people who have died. I see grandmas and babies and veterans and think all about the lives affected by their sometimes untimely death. I'm walking around the cemetery with tears streaming down my face and it felt like it had become a night of remembering these people and sitting with them to celebrate their lives instead of coming to get a little spooked for my entertainment oh i did this for several minutes walking in a straight line then decided to turn perpendicular and head that way i took literally one step in this direction looking down still at the headstones when in the upper part of my view i saw and felt a tall dark figure about six feet in front of me oh it wasn't moving but it was the blackest darkest thing i'd ever experienced both in color and feeling oh my god it was the kind of darkness that makes you feel like the light has never existed and never will again i just got

chills i stopped dead in my tracks kept my eyes down and put my hand and put my hands up and surrender because i felt like he was pissed at me for being there and really didn't want me to come any closer i said out loud i was so sorry to have disturbed him and backed away followed promptly by me noping the fuck out of there over the next few weeks i kept feeling this figure in my apartment out of the corner of my eye especially as i would walk past a room oh god it felt like he it felt like he was just standing in the room staring at me with hatred fuck i continued to feel him more and more frequently until one night i experienced my first and only sleep paralysis oh fuck i woke up with a start and saw the figure standing over me next to my bed petrified i could only hyperventilate which i sure as fuck did as the hulking figure simply stood there leering at me though i couldn't see any eyes several months uh several moments not months lord several moments went by and a quiet

terror and then all of a sudden the figure started growing oh good upward and outward stretching to the ceiling and getting wider like it was opening its arms making this blackest black literally take over my entire bedroom jesus until i felt like it was completely enveloping my body and there was Jesus. Oh, God. lifted needless to say i haven't been back to the cemetery and that was the last time i've seen the figure maybe he just wanted to teach me a lesson or he wanted to scare the ever-living shit out of me because he was bored and it worked but i won't be visiting any more cemeteries for a good while so love you guys cheers clink jaylen oh that was a lot i don't think what's going on there i think what really freaked me out is the black is black both in sight

and feeling yeah like that dread yeah that people talk about which you felt right yes i have only once or twice but it's i felt it too many times like there's no hope left in the world feeling it's like congratulations you're fucked yeah it will never get better it will never go away awful especially if you're in sleep paralysis. I can't imagine. Right, right, right, right, right. Jesus. Well, I'm kind of mad at Jalen for specifying that they like you better than me, but that's okay.

That was not... I think Jalen likes whiskey better than either of us. Well, I think Jalen's only stuck liking me because of the whiskey. Fine. It's fine. It keeps Jalen less accountable, I think, which is nice. What, what?'s fine it keeps jaylen less accountable i think which is nice what what i think it keeps jaylen less accountable like oh we can just be team wine that's all oh i guess that's fair look you thanks for trying to make me feel better and you look you

bring people to the drink but only in a good way well clearly not i don't know if that was really a good thing you bring them to the drink in a good way and then the drink brings them to other things in a bad way like walking around in cemeteries right so i just push them off a cliff okay sure yeah okay cool ready for the next one no okay this is called this is called sending chills and thrills from a warship in south china sea chills and thrills trademark that so we can make a spinoff one day. Chills and Thrills. Theory and Theory, Chills and Thrills. Chills and Thrills in the South China Sea. That's another spinoff.

Love it. Love it. Love it. Hi, guys. My name is Christina. Mine too. And I want to start out by thanking you all so much for helping me and my friends get through deployments. Oh, thank you for your service.

Very nice. We are currently enlisted in the U.S. Navy and stationed in Japan. We work no less than 12 hours a day, seven days a week for up to three months at a time on an aircraft carrier in the middle of the ocean and your podcast really helps keep us entertained let's never complain again by the way oh right you got it okay good thank you for your service lol oh no don't thank us okay wait what you're welcome yeah you're welcome she said thank you for your service lol thank you for yours and then never and then never thank us for anything again please don't please don't all righty let's get into it so i have a younger sister karina who was born on the same day as me she was born on my fourth birthday and honestly totally crashed my party i can't

imagine i i would hate that i think that would be ann's worst nightmare i'd be like but no this is a day about me back the fuck up yeah that's why the world put us a day apart from each other you were kind enough to wait because i was born the year before you so you were kind enough to like i knew what was what you came out a little early to be like yeah i'll give you tomorrow it right yeah i was like you wanted to upstage me a little bit by taking the day before mine i was like i want to make sure that if my birthday is on a sunday yours is a fucking monday that is but truth i'll still let you enjoy it a little bit oh so good you're so good i i am way good you're so good uh her impressive timing resulted in a cancellation of my first trip to chucky cheese and boy was i pissed for a four-year-old now i'm

pissed that's devastating actually wait a minute i hate her i hate the little sister terrible she turned out to be the best birthday present okay never mind i take it back you've added that out she turned out to be the first the best birthday present i've ever gotten though so i guess i forgive her i guess we do too ever since we're young her and i have experienced many paranormal and extraterrestrial encounters oh my oh dear from watching things move on their own to having strange lights in the sky follow us for miles as we drove we just seem to attract it all and for some reason creepy encounters only seem to happen when we're together i'll tell you about the two possible extraterrestrial encounters that stand out to me the most oh i'm excited let's go growing up karina and i shared a room we had bunk beds on the opposite wall facing our bedroom door

i had top bunk and one night i woke up to a very short figure standing in our doorway okay i'm already scared it kind of freaks me out that it's short you should feel like i've seen short i feel like i just always expect them to be tall like lanky yeah i expect it to be really jarring but they have those little green men's wants to right right i just think if i ever saw anything standing above my bed or in my room i would expect it to be tall which is terrifying true but because that would be like the one thing i could expect out of the scenario if it were short i'd be thrown off again you'd be like i'd be like even more yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah no i get that okay so it's short sorry okay it's short um and creepy stop let's stop talking about how short it is or it's probably gonna come over here

uh short we were at short it's thanks case you forgot its head took oh dear oh dear oh god what its head took up about half of its body and it was only about four feet tall because it's so short you whoever this alien body oh my go home with em just almost knock the furniture over go home with them i don't i i can't have any more juju in this fucking room right right okay i remember oh i did it so the head is two feet tall as well thank you oh my god i'm so glad that you are uh keeping me in check here i couldn't have been older than nine so my only reaction was to hide under my blankets i don't honestly still react the same at 24 yeah me too i remember peeking out every 15 minutes or so to see if it had left but

it stayed standing in the doorway that's the worst because you expect like when you blink it'll be gone yeah you're like rub your eyes and it's still there this thing is just like defying every stereotype i've made for my sleep paralysis experience fantastic great it's all bad and she's not paralyzed so that doesn't work either oh right she's hiding under the bed i forgot okay so did it up i peeked out every 15 minutes or so but it stayed standing in the doorway watching us for hours oh my god i remember being drenched in sweat from fear but being too scared to call out for help i guess i had eventually fallen asleep in the morning i tried to explain what i had seen to my sister and before i could

even get a few words out her face dropped and she went pale she looked at me and said you saw it too i'm freaking out right now i'm sorry me too oh no she told me how she had also been hiding under the blankets and had been too scared to call out we tried to explain to our parents what we had seen but they wrote us off as having wild imaginations okay fuck those parents because if both of your children are seeing it something to consider i think or they're just i mean no me as a parent i mean you as a parent i'm like a thousand percent you saw an alien let's get out of dodge i mean probably me as a parent too but i can i can understand why people would be like well they've been watching the same show or something i could see it and

it's a shame that i'm not a logical human being but at the same time like if i even heard that one day your kids see that and then you you said like oh it's probably just a blah blah i'd be like no christine i think your kids are right no i think i think i would absolutely 100 believe anything that comes out please and alison are gonna kill us one day when we have they're the ones that are gonna be pissed they're gonna text each other and be like did your kids see some big looming monster too and alison be like no this one saw something short i was gonna say it was four feet tall its head was two feet tall this next story happened about 10 years later my sister and i were both watching movies in my room when we fell asleep

we were both laying on the floor side by side and i had a very vivid dream dreaming vividly is not new to me seeing as it happens every time i sleep but this dream was different i dreamt that my sister and i were being experimented on by very tall, slender beings. Tall. They were testing the effects of swapping souls into different bodies. Get the fuck out. I cannot. Into different bodies, and they explained to me that my sister and I were the perfect candidates

because of how similar we are in appearance and behavior. And they have the same birthday. Wow. Be thankful if you're a sibling that looks nothing like your sibling by the way yes because apparently that has saved you or okay um they successfully transferred my soul into her body and hers into mine what and i distinctly remember looking down at her hands which were now mine oh my god i looked up to see my old body sitting across from me and i understood that my sister's soul now inhabited it good night i i walked over to a mirror and as i looked at my

new body i began to panic i demanded that we be changed back the beings did their best to calm me down but had eventually agreed to change us back. They started to... At least they're reasonable. Damn. They take some wearing down, but... Right, right. You really just have to convince them of your argument and then they'll hear you.

I demanded that we be changed back. They started to count down from 10 and when they reached one, I woke up. This is terrifying me right now. And a thousand percent real by the way i refuse to believe anything else oh me too the very second i opened my eyes my sister sat up stop it i can't she looked over at me and said that was weird you're breaking the sound i'm so sorry that's bananas then turned over and went back to sleep in the morning she said she couldn't exactly remember what she dreamt but she knew it wasn't good.

People often don't remember their dreams, and it makes me wonder the types of experiments that could be happening as we sleep. And here I am trying to look at more fucking lucid dreaming. I don't like that. Wow, you're so right, though. If that was what they remembered, imagine what they don't remember. And the sister didn't remember, so it's kind of like she just had a bad dream, which is like, oh, God. Like that one she happened to shrug off, but imagine what the writer writer of this imagine what she's just also shrugged off that her sister definitely remembered the fucking a okay those are just a couple stories i hope you enjoyed them

it's been so inspirational to hear the transformation of your podcast from saying things like imagine if someone sponsored us oh right lol to hosting your own live shows i'm a huge fan and i'm excited to see where life takes you all sending love from japan christina wow these are alien stories get me so fucking good they scare the absolute shit out of me that's one thing that i'm so fucking scared of because there's like i totally believe it and i don't think there's anything you can do about it no that's what's not at all like at least with ghosts i'm like okay like they can't hurt me i can put up sage if i go to like a powerful enough church like maybe i'm safe but like aliens can't hurt me i can put up sage if i go to like a powerful enough church like maybe i'm safe but like aliens can get you out of church clearly they can get you in your

sleep they can get you i wonder we never i mean we could talk about this we should probably do an on our own episode about aliens moving on yikes okay this is from jasmine thank you jasmine jasmine's subject is smooth jazz mince get out of here nope um actually i'm very excited about this because the subject title is canadian prime minister's haunted house oh my god okay perfect way to pander to me because you know i love a good a good canadian that's right we just got back from vancouver so perfect timing so jasmine says hi christine m eva and the lovely fur babies hi i obviously am a huge Eva and the lovely fur babies. Hi. I obviously am a huge fan of the podcast and it was very easily and is very easily the only thing that kept me awake on my early morning drives to work this past summer.

So you're welcome for us. A lot of people say that they fall asleep to our show. So yeah, it's always one or the other. Either we keep you awake or we you fall asleep very fast. Both kind of mean, but also very nice but also as long as you keep it playing so we get the listens right downloads we just need the stats that's all that matters um go to your other sleeping family relatives and also just turn our podcast on um that job that i was driving to ended up leaving me with a couple of ghostly stories that i think you guys might enjoy especially em well here I am reading telling you everybody thinks that you're just the the best

they're right so I guess to start off I'm from Canada listen that's the all that's the entire story I needed and the job I had was at a museum in the city that was uh an old house the old house of former canadian prime minister john i suck defen baker don't listen this is your fucking homeland i know call it john d that's what we're gonna call him because i'm very ignorant um at this point i will say that it was common knowledge that his first wife edna had actually passed away in this house as well oh boy um it was just an everyday thing. We would come in the morning, come in in the morning with a good morning Edna and leave for the night with a good night Edna as a little inside joke. Yeah. I like that. As a joke,

maybe not, but it's kind. Um, it is kind. It is kind. Uh, it wasn't too bad, but you never really wanted to be there alone. But now I'll share a couple of the stories that we ended up getting by the end of the summer. Okay. The strangest thing that happened to me was during uh some downtime while i was relaxing in the staff room the room was built as an addition when they turned the house into a museum and it's sort of a balcony that rests over a part of the basement where we would store the garbage bins and there was a door down there that was bolted shut except for when you were in there to take out the trash while i was sitting there minding my own business i was all of a sudden startled by a loud banging coming from below me it literally sounded like somebody was banging bloody murder on the door

in the basement oh god i quickly looked out the windows to see who was um but there was nobody in sight i even went as far as going outside to look around but nobody was there. I have no explanation to what it could have been because it was so loud and it was very obviously ripe underneath me. There were always weird sounds like footsteps and what sounded like humming as well as strange breezes but this was so different than all that it seemed very angry. Oh great. Another story comes from one of my co-workers. She was getting ready to close up for the night and was turning off all the lights. She got done upstairs and when she was back on the first floor they heard footsteps upstairs uh that's your cue to leave by the way that's goodbye goodbye um there were only ever two people on shift there and both of them were downstairs

and because it's mandatory for us to give guided tours it wouldn't have been a guest looking around as my co-worker went to look upstairs she noticed that all the lights were turned back on. Yeah, I'd not go upstairs. Exactly. Again, you're cute. That's your second chance. Rather than mess with whatever Edna may have been up to, they just left the lights on and went home. Oh, thank you for listening to us.

Finally. By the next morning, the lights were back off. Oh, that is creepy. there were a bunch of other creepy things but this email is already getting too long the last thing i will say though is that the idea that the house was haunted was confirmed to me eventually not because of all the weird events that happened but because of one tour i was giving to a little girl and her mom while wandering around the house the girl who i was uh who i would guess was maybe four or five asked who lived here.

Her mom and me both explained that it was the former prime minister and his wife, but they left a long time ago. They always say that kids are more spiritually in tune than adults. So when she looked me dead in the eye and calmly said, no, they're still here with a little laugh. I got chills that I don't think ever went away,

but all in all, it was a great summer job. Nine out of 10 would recommend one point deducted for the ghosts. Thanks again for making such a great podcast team. Absolutely. Any alcohol precious. Also, so excited that you guys added a Canada date. We love to see you guys as much as we love you guys as much as M loves us.

So nice. Oh, and that just in case people are listening that canada date she's referring to has already happened so we have already been there come catch us in florida come catch us in florida um much love and spooks jasmine ps m on behalf of canada i give you full permission to wear our flag as a cape at the show oh well you uh that literally happened by the way so that is some psychic shit well you did talk about it once oh shit but but it is nice that i'm glad i got the permission because post i definitely did it without permission event um anyway so thank you jasmine oh thank you jasmine that was creepy anything in those historic house i mean especially after my whaley house thing like right right right

it's like oh no they're still here there's something going on especially if a little kid well that's what they said at the whale house too that the little kids always see the dog running around right right right right which is just and they also see other little kids playing oh like they'll try to play with the little kids remember the girl who got her her head caught off with the clothesline because she went to go smell was that whaley house that was the really house you're right yeah oh i forgot about like she smelled cookies and so she was outside and ran into the house to go eat some cookies and she ran through a clothesline and her neck got punctured or something and that's how she died episode two episode two clothesline cookies the first of

many ways i would probably die so that's right the lone band-aid that was robert durst wow good times good times oh good times except we're now in better read episode two read clothesline cookies except i was sad and broke so lol let's stay in this time okay for now oh oh okay well since you had a canada i have a whatever this is it's called Craigslist Honeymoon Killers Slay Small Town Sugar Daddy. Topical for you, I guess. For me? Um, stop it. This is the best intro I think we've ever gotten. This is from Kimberly.

Okay. Dear Funklem, living doll. Yes! And Eva, write this down. Oh, wait a minute. Are those our three shirts? We should get shirts that say that. I don't want a living doll.

I don't want a living doll shirt. To be fair, i'm kind of mad that i don't have a shirt yet that says funko limb with just a bunch of pictures of geo all over it you write that down just saying oh god now you're gonna have 20 and they're gonna be stuck in my house and then we'll get you a uh life-size barbie you know how much i hate those you know how scared i am of those it's probably easier to find than a shirt that says fungal m but well it's fine we already have a lot of shirts with geo's face on them so i know it's not gonna be out of the realm of possibility true dear fungal i'm living doll and eva write this down listen prior to november 2013 my hometown's biggest claim to fame was the

guinness world record set for longest banana split get out that's bananas moving on the selling screw of pennsylvania is a small town in which you'd be more worried about running into an amish buggy than an alleged serial killer both sound dangerous to me enter miranda and elite elite ellett e-l-y-t-t-e ellett ellett enter miranda and ellett barber then 19 and 22 respectively the couple had recently married in north carolina and decided to celebrate by moving to the middle of nowhere oh dear okay what a way to celebrate by the way let's get the fuck out of here and no one will ever see us again well there's a step two oh okay they decided to celebrate by moving to the middle of nowhere and oh yeah straight up murdering someone okay so they're really into the whole celebrating thing they took it in a bad way a little too far while i didn't know the victim

troy left troy la ferrara personally he allegedly survived nope he allegedly i don't think he survived sorry while i didn't know the victim troy la ferrara personally he allegedly served as a sugar daddy for a friend of a friend oh okay it makes sense then that la ferrara god i'm probably saying this wrong la ferrara met miranda on craigslist mistake number one i not me that's what it says when he answered her ad offering delightful conversation in exchange for money oh my apparently miranda's version of delightful conversation involves luring a stranger into her h Honda and stabbing him 20 times in the parking lot of a mall I worked at for years. Holy shit.

Oh, fuck. Miranda's husband, Elliot, was hiding in the backseat. Oh, God, oh, God, oh, God. When LaFerrara entered the car. When LaFerrara allegedly attempted to initiate the delightful conversation, Miranda signaled to her husband, oh, God, who leapt up and wrapped a cord around his neck and began to strangle him as if this guy wasn't having a bad enough day Miranda then stabbed him 20 times before

she and her husband left him for dead in an alley the couple then celebrate listen the celebrating thing has to stop the word celebrating has to we need to redefine that we do and they're ruining it for everyone the couple then celebrated achieving their self-proclaimed dream of killing someone together oh so that was like a like a it was on their zilla

registry right it was like on their like like couple to-do list right like their vision board for themselves yikes okay like a like a date like a vision date board yeah you know those fun like things that they tell you to do on pinterest where you put dates in a jar and then you pick them right they picked that one apparently they put only that in their jar just 20 times over and over and over right okay so where are we the couple incelerated their dream of killing someone together by cleaning up the blood miranda's car and cruising to a local strip club oh dear but that's not even the craziest part oh after miranda was incarcerated she did an interview with a local newspaper in this interview

she casually stated that she joined a satanic cult in alaska when she was 13 casual very casual it was in this cult that she states she killed her first victim the first of 22 between 2008 and 2013 that's offensive to my lucky number and also this whole time i thought that like her dream was like to with her with her husband right to kill i didn't know she had already actually killed apparently so so she just had like a like a scavenger hunt of different types of kills she wanted to do she murdered 23 so at least at least it's off the year number 22 safe got it 23 yeah but that's not oh i already read that okay 22 people between 2008 and 2013 law enforcement has never been able to substantiate these claims.

And a spokesman for the Satanic Temple, which is apparently a thing you can be denied that she is a member. OK, so she could. So Miranda can probably add pathological liar to the long list of diagnoses that currently make up her sparkling personality. Sparkling. Another word we need to redefine. Kim, you're funny uh the honeymooners plead guilty to second degree murder no pled guilty to second degree murder to avoid the death penalty in 2014 they were both sentenced to life in prison without the possibility of parole thank god miranda had a one-year-old daughter when she committed the murder thank you guys for listening to my hometown murder i conquered my agoraphobia and social

anxiety to come see your brooklyn show oh wow oh in january we had so much fun at that show by the way we still talk about that show that was a good one i think we talked about like yesterday yeah um and i fangirled so hard when i met you after the show oh it's been a real joy to watch your podcast grow and i'm weirdly proud of your success oh that's so kind i like that atwd gives me life on my monday morning commute i always save it to have something to look forward to much love kim team wine if that's still a thing oh it's still a thing oh it's still around don't don't you worry that's the one thing of the show that lasted forever milkshakes kind of went by the wayside there's nothing as golden as team wine like geo

and wine are the only two remaining oh bbb yep all right so okay that just really was a lot sorry that was a lot to handle for sure um this is my final story so there's one more after this okay um this is by kristin okay and kristin the uh subject title is accidental astral projecting or something oh i'm story amped about this i love stories about us for projecting i or something or something a story um okay so this says hi i'm christine and eva hi i'm listening to this week's episode about sleep paralysis and lucid dreaming and it reminded me of a story my mom told me about her experience when my mom was in college she was home during a break and her family had a small driveway and no garage um so she had to park her car out on the

street uh one night while she was sleeping she dreamt that she floated up out of her body she described being able to see herself still asleep on the bed um which sounds trippy as fuck but i guess didn't phase her because she decided to go on a walk around the house oh that's cool that's the weirder part to me like why would you just go walk around your house i think well never mind we'll talk about that we'll talk about i've read a lot about this too but i mean the hardest part is like staying in that staying in the zone grounding yourself in that because i feel like i've never been able to do it yeah every time i'm like oh and then i wake up yeah yeah so congratulations first of all on your mother being able to get this far she She's like a baller.

When she got to the front window, which overlooked the street, she saw someone messing with her car. Oh, shit. She didn't know who the person was, and she tried banging on the window and yelling to get them to stop whatever they were doing. But of course, since her physical body was still in bed, they didn't hear her. Wow. Well, she woke up in the morning thinking that this was just a very strange dream. But's when things get weird she went out to check on her car and guess what her gas cap was off and someone had siphoned her tank i am losing it okay that is creepy as hell she had somehow watched it happen while she was asleep in bed an interesting note is that her grandma apparently

had some sort of sixth sense i'm not entirely sure to what extent because i never met her but maybe it ran in the family which is what my mom thought too because it was this experience that led her to say no thanks to the spirits and that was that no more out-of-body experiences wow so that's all i have for you hope you enjoyed it i love the podcast and can't wait to see you all live in cincinnati hey kristen Hey, girl. Okay, that is bananas to me. I love I love I love anything that is out of the realm. And a lot of skeptics can usually logically explain away. And there is pure evidence in front of us being like, what the fuck do you call that? There's just like, there's how do you explain it? There's nothing more like satisfying satisfying to be like ha ha finally like explain it away something yeah yeah it's not just in my head right well yeah and that actually really

freaks me out because now i'm thinking about that alien dream stuff and i'm like if the soul leaves your body to astral project and then these aliens are trying to transfer souls it's like really freaking me out oh i'm gonna have weird dreams tonight i might kind of might come visit you in burbank oh yep. In my soul. I would just have you rather walk around the house and call it a night. I'd probably get lost knowing me. I'd get lost in my own goddamn house. Okay.

Bidibidiba. Oh, that's the one you just read. Okay. Oh, great. Final story. How are we ending it? Sounds like Eva picked this for last. Because this might be the end of all of us.

Oh, boy. Subject is, this is from Sabrina. ending it sounds like eva picked this for last because this might be the end of all of us oh boy subject is this is from sabrina subject is i'm breaking an unspeakable oath for you guys good bye good day goodbye by the time this comes out if we're not around that is proof that god damn it sabrina this came true whatever you're about to do okay hey guys i just got caught up with the podcast and i am super addicted i used to listen to it at work until someone tapped me on the shoulder and I screamed really loudly and was asked to stop listening to scary things at work. Oh my God. Anyways, I have a colonial ghost story for you. Love a good colonial story. Oh, I have the colonial Williamsburg on the pinboard up here. Do you really? Big postcard. Oh, I see it. I love a good colonial Williamsburg.

Can't wait to go back. Anyways, I have a colonial ghost trip for you this was back when my school took an eighth grade trip to the east coast for a revolutionary war sites trip wow welcome to every trip everyone on the east coast ever did we did that too um the first thing we did was a ghost tour in williamsburg well we didn't fucking get to do ghost we didn't do a ghost tour but i definitely went to colonial williamsburg every being someone who is trying to live near there yeah yeah but also like central virginia that like the field trips every year we went to the white house every year we went to colonial williamsburg like by the time you graduated high school you'd seen both at least 12 times yeah and then i went to a college that was 20 minutes away

from colonial williamsburg So I saw it even more. Like all the time. Anyway, moving on. We didn't get to do that. We just, I mean, I also was a Catholic school. I don't think they were going to do a ghost tour. Oh yeah. We definitely didn't do the ghost things at all.

That was when I got my college job. I'm not very Christian. And I forced myself into getting to see these ghost things and get paid. So. Well, yeah. That was all fun. Braggart. Patience is a virtue.

I guess I got to do private investigating. No, you're a badass. We both kind of found our weird niches and got paid for them. I like how the world waited for us to become a private eye and a paranormal investigator before we became friends. And then prop maker and then Nickelodeon kids TV writer. I was like, you guys do all of your dream jobs first. How weird. And then once you've crossed them off your list, then you can become friends and we'll really fuck the world over in a really cool way guys that's proof

of something because i honestly never thought i'd even make it as a writer of anything let alone like that do that and then leave that for something i liked more so just saying yeah same i never thought i'd get to work in the movie industry and then i was like oh here's my dream now i quit if it feels hopeless literally if it feels hopeless just trust us something's something cool is about to happen this is like the astro projection like prove it yeah okay vision boarding are you guys so happy that we just talk about ourselves all the time um okay we're still an eighth grade trip first thing you did was a ghost tour in williamsburg i am so jealous i was 100 a skeptic at the time and mostly just wanted to go back to the hotel to sleep.

Okay. Fair. We were probably friends back then, by the way. I don't exactly remember all of the details, but I'm pretty sure this happened at the Peyton Randolph house. I've covered that one. I was like, it sounds familiar. Okay. That's fine.

Long story short, a slave got thrown into the attic where she was left until she died. Oh, fuck. Until she died. As the tour guide finished up their spooky spiel my friend jared took a picture of the window that she appears in like a freaking tourist oh she's saying like he they were like oh she appears in this window he took the picture he looks down at oh well he looks down at his camera and screams everyone rushes over to look and when people walked away i asked what was there there. She's like, I'll give everyone a second and then I'll get the real deal later. Stop being hysterical. What's the scoop, Jared?

What's the scoop? What is everyone getting so worked up about? What's the 411? They said nothing was there. Huh? So I took a look anyways and without any doubt in my mind, there was a woman there. Not a weird light or a mist. Straight up a person who was glowing. I'm pretty sure the color drained from my face because jared

asked if i could see her too oh so everyone else no one else could yeah ew okay that's one thing if the spirit doesn't want you to see them but then you take a picture and everyone can see it in the picture yeah but it's a whole other like power lit like that is a power move for sure oh yeah to be like you can't see me and then if you take a picture of me i can still control who sees me and the skeptic's the only one who's gonna see it right oh spooky okay um right uh the dirt asked if i could see her too we then both experienced chills and lightheadedness the group was already moving on while we were frozen in place looking at the camera too scared to look at the actual window right another employee came up and said oh yeah she does that sometimes

oh yeah that's her that's her i picture i'm on their segue like rolling and being that happens i actually was i know the best part is i was a segue tour guide and a paranormal investigator for the same company at the first because because before I was a paranormal investigator, I was doing ghost tours. Oh, I see. So I was doing, I was a tour guide by day on Segway. And then by night I was a ghost tour guide. The superhero we all need.

Right. So, but if you did come on a tour with me, um, on the Segway, I would like also throw some like cool ghost stuff in there. Like, because I'm with you for a whole hour. So I would kind of get the vibe. So it wasn't a ghost tour it was like a regular tour we would do a and then you threw ghost event right like we would be doing like a history tour okay and then since we did like an hour tour i would kind of get a vibe whether or not they were open to that stuff and i would throw some ghost things in there i love that which worked

well because they'd be like how do you know this much and i'd be like well we also have ghost tours at night come on down look at you and then i would be their tour guide for a second time then you would spin around on your segway remember me can i get a second set of tips please i was gonna say yeah what there was something that our tour guide said in uh new orleans that i really liked it was if you're feeling because everyone's drinking like if you're feeling tipsy leave a gratuity if you're feeling tipsy, leave a gratuity. If you're feeling gratuitous, leave a tip. I was like, that's precious. Wait, I was super into it. Wait, M in 2011? Use that.

Yeah. Go back. Go back. Right, right. Okay. Bebop. Not a weird letter. Missed straight up a person.

Oh, that's, sorry. Terrible noise. Okay. Employee came up and said, oh, yeah, she does that sometimes, and left. Jared and I decided to never talk about this again as long as we live so if he's listening sorry jared i had to tell someone oh oh see you jared sorry if this was really long wish i could see you guys in salt lake don't forget to be awesome sabrina oh my gosh so the unspeakable oath was we will never speak of this and now i love it just broadcasted it so i'm the one well oh man maybe if you start looking in your

pictures and you see a random woman there don't take a picture of my house ever because it's because now she follows you all right well you get the weird short alien man so good luck four foot alien i'm against it oh gross oh my grotesque vomitous grotesque um all right well that's that on that huh is that on that on that well happy march thank you to everyone who submitted stories if you would like to be in the running to uh appear in our future listeners episodes then you can send in your stories too and that's why we drink at gmail.com where we uh go through all the true crime paranormal real life experiences of our listeners and the more catchy your subject is and the more concise your email

is the more likely it is that you will get a chance to get to it because we have thousands and thousands amen so thank you guys so much um i guess we'll see you in april yay okay we well we'll also see you in like two days well we'll see you in other places but listeners episode version we'll see you in april okay we love you goodbye and oh that's why we drink right i always forget that's the thing bye