And That's Why We Drink - Listener Stories: Vol. 89

Episode Date: March 1, 2024

We're bringing new meaning to "March Madness" this month with Trevin and Amanda from Live, Laugh, Larceny! They teach us how to live in the petty atmosphere with our fingers on the petty pulse and we make them read stories about murder. Together we're diving into stories about psychopomps, flower shop orders from a murderer and the Duggar cult to name just a few. And don't forget to feed your escort to the underworld aka your favorite pet... and that's why we drink!Check out Trevin and Amanda on their podcast Live, Laugh, Larceny! https://www.livelaughlarceny.com

it's a listener's episode but we have friends here today for once we do we we brought ourselves a few guests and by we brought i mean um eva fully orchestrated it for us so thank you eva um but we we have uh well really christ, I feel like you should introduce them because you know them a little better than I do. This is Trevin and Amanda from Live Laugh Larceny. As you can imagine, we love the freaking podcast name. I love the show. I think it's very fun.

My brother, I think, has done a crossover with you too. Yes. Yes. So we're so thrilled to have you here for a listeners episode. Welcome. Like I said, we are beyond honored to be here. Yes, thanks so much. Thank you.

Em apparently immediately had something to say. Sorry, Em, go ahead. Nope. That's just kind of the way I operate is I just only like to throw myself in when not needed. But for those of you who have never heard one of our listeners episodes before, we put one out on the first of every month so happy march everybody uh we haven't gotten there yet uh in time and space but hoping it's going good and oh march first that means it's justin bieber's birthday oh big news silence crickets cool um. Okay. Going good. Christine, you got a half interested. Oh, JB from Amanda. I think that you should just take what you can get and run with it.

I would love to give Trevin and Amanda a chance to tell us about their podcast or just a little like just in case people haven't listened to it yet, which they oh my goodness well yes if you haven't heard of our show live left larceny um basically we are a true petty crime podcast so we don't talk about anything murdery you know nothing too heavy um but we like to kind of switch the the true crime comedy genre around a little bit and instead of talking about heavy subject matter you know some you know in a light-hearted way it's more light-hearted subject matter in a more dramatic in a dramatic way i love that that's so clever and trevin i'll let you kind of explain how you make it more dramatic because he is seriously, you guys, like a very, very skilled editor. He comes up with all of our original music in the background, all of our sounds.

He's so good. Oh, my God. Well, Tchaikovsky over here. I don't know who that is. I don't know who that is. So I really enjoyed storytelling podcasts that have a lot of sound effects behind them and a lot of sound design. And I thought it would be really kind of fun to do more of that within podcasts. So kind of, I watched a lot of Tiny Toons growing up.

And I loved when they would do their, before they would present a cartoon, it would be like babs and buster would come out and talk and then like point at the screen and then they would have like a plucky duck cartoon or something play so cute yeah the way i kind of envisioned it for amanda and i was sort of the same way we both come out and we write original stories based off of dumb criminal stories or petty stories in the news and then we tell them as if they are a very dramatic like a dateline-esque uh you know horror story i mean i get why we get along like with alex and my brother and i we do our like dramatic readings of like karen once our parent like silly reviews i do get the i do get the like there's something very uh enticing about making something ridiculous like seem very very serious um so i applaud you for that it's a great

angle no your your show beach too sandy water too wet oh my god yes that is a vibe yeah let's talk about that for a while i'm i'm just here enjoy the ride. You guys do whatever you need to do. Anyway, so Eva, our wonderful producer, has prepped some stories for us to read. And as always, we don't know them in advance. But I know she did try to look into petty crimes and said we didn't really get many of those submissions, unfortunately. But so we'll see what what she has to bring to the table but um i think she instructed me to go first so i guess i'll go ahead and read one okay so this is from danielle she her and it is called mini murder love story okay okay you don't talk about murder maybe a mini murder

i don't know we'll see that's very uh thatmurder. I don't know. We'll see. That's very on-brand. The real twist would be if at the end of this we realized that the two of them came on just because they wanted to hear us read stories they wrote. Oh! All of a sudden we just hear a piano and we're like, where's that coming from? All of a sudden Buster Bunny walks through and it's like...

Presenting. Okay, this says, Greetings ATWW team one and all And then like Buster Bunny walks through and it's like. Presenting. Okay. This says, greetings ATWW team one and all. In your recent episode, you were talking about family meet-cutes. I wanted to share a mini true crime love story. Oh my. My maternal great-grandfather was a physically giant man.

So giant, in fact, he made a lot of money with his side hustle bare knuckle boxing remember back in the day when that could just be a thing that you do as a side hustle my hobby is punching people in the face for in the face for sport yeah it's it was a hobby now it's like you're a entrepreneur like he's actually he's making he's making money off this off this yeah isn't that what abraham lincoln did that is that what did he do that he did oh yeah abe was real buff he would have had my vote just on that he said that a little too excited She has fond memories. Oh, yeah. Back in his day, it was something. Vote for me or else, you know?

Probably would have worked. Okay. One night, things got a little intense and he ended up killing his opponent in the ring. Oh, okay.

Well. And it's sad. Not our story anymore. Nope, not yours anymore yours anymore piano has stopped did i mention these were prohibition era underground boxing matches no well it's not super awesome to kill a dude in what is essentially a basement booze filled fight he was promptly arrested and sentenced to prison in pontiac illinois his entire family moved there to be in the same town with him. Cut to my grandmother being

in high school, still in Pontiac, and meeting my grandfather. The rest is history. My grandmother and I had a deep connection and she contacted me when she died, but that's a story for another day. Just kidding, I'll tell you now. Wow, that's the first time that's ever happened. Whoa, goody.

We've never done that before. We get a lot of that's a story for another day. And it's so infuriating. Cause we're like, no, we want it. But you know, it was one month where we actually did a whole listeners episode where the topic or the theme was the stories that were for another day and had people, all those people who wrote in saying, Oh, that's sorry for another day. We're like, well, yeah, we're going to call your bluff. Send it on in. It's time.

Well, you finally got it. This is your time. Here it goes. That's a story for another day. Just kidding. I'll tell you now. She passed on my 22nd birthday. I remember waking up at 3 a.m. to throw up.

Oh. I had one drink that night because I had to drive so I wasn't swammered I was in the middle of an out of nowhere panic attack when I felt someone rubbing my back telling me that she was sorry she left today but she had to be with Joe they missed each other too much and she was in too much pain to stay she asked me to forgive her and through my tears and not understanding I said I would always forgive her she had always rubbed my back as i cried confused i went back to bed and slept fitfully later that morning i got up to open cards my parents had brought up for me and in what was an extreme

show of restraint hadn't opened as soon as they left my phone rang it was my mom calling she said happy birthday and asked what i was doing i said said, opening up my cards. I have grandma's in my hand. She responded, about that. And I knew what had happened. That morning was my grandmother giving up the fight and asking me to forgive her. Too long didn't read. My great grandpa killed a dude, went to prison, and his family followed. And that's where my grandparents met.

And then my grandma died on my birthday. But she felt bad about it. So I'm not mad, even though I'm a Leoo end of email oh wow that was chaotic you know that's a lot to put on someone who's already vomiting on their birthday is like to just show up and be like i need you to forgive everything that's about to happen to you it's but also what a power move because you know that like they can't very well like stand up for themselves yeah like they're at their weakest right there yeah that's true that's true and also but imagine grandma showed up and like was ready to like have this big last final warm hug and just saw her grandkid like vomiting it's like

oh this is a really awkward way but we gotta like now i gotta hold your hair back i need other people to visit right she's like okay suck it up and listen to this real quick okay happy birthday but also oh my goodness that is really sweet though i have to say if that's like the thing that she remembered her grandmother doing and then that happened oh my god the fact that she would rub her back that's really nice i wonder though if grandma showed up and created the panic attack because it said she only had one drink so she didn't get sick from the drink did grandma show up and immediately like i don't know stir her up yeah stir stir something in the universe i don't know um but can i say like i wonder you know it's it's very it's a mini murder love story he was sent at pontiac and then her family met and then yeah but can you imagine if the guy who went

to jail there died and then went to heaven and then they were like oh well your whole purpose was to bring your family to Pontiac like I feel he'd be like I could not have happened another way I had to go right to prison in Pontiac for this love story right I don't know it's quite a it's quite a uh it's I don't know I don't know what it is it a, I don't know. I don't know what it is. And they're a Leo. I mean. Romantic? I took that away as well from the story.

Took that as well. You can't forget that part. I'm glad you held on to it. I feel like I lived a whole life in just that TLDR. It felt like scenes rushing past. Everything happened so fast while you were saying that. I'm like, oh, and a Leo. Whoa.

Whoa. It's like their happened so fast while you were saying that. I'm like, oh, and a Leo. Whoa. Whoa. It's like their life flashed before our eyes, you know? It's like, maybe, honestly, Em, maybe we were not ready for a story for another day to be today. I guess not. Maybe we just weren't ready. It was going to be a lot of details and we had to be ready to grab them. But maybe we need, this is a lesson.

It's a lesson learned. Yeah. Let the story be for another day no just kidding thank you um so much danielle i hope i said that earlier danielle uh for your story um i love it and i'm so glad that you can see the beautiful romance of it all of the underground bar fight or whatever it was it's beautiful it's like i'm there yeah yeah behind every bar brawl there's a real love story isn't there's a grandma who's gonna get laid and okay sorry i didn't mean never mind okay i

mean you didn't say anything untrue so don't apologize totally thank you all right now that we've talked about grandma getting it in this time let's do um let's go into um our next story which is titled mothman um and this is from lauren mothman oh okay great and this is from lauren who uses she her pronouns thank you for normalizing pronouns and lauren says hello i think i'm finally ready to tell my Mothman story to you all. This story has sent chills down many spines. Christine, are you listening? Christine is our in-house, what's the right word?

I have no idea. Spine killer? Mothman aficionado is the kindest way to put it, but also desperate for Mothman to... Like simp? A little bit of a simp maybe a simp i learned what that word was recently if christine if christine was it happened to go into a bar brawl and mothman was fighting you know if i happen to be a grandma in pontiac illinois and mothman that happened it could happen a A resident of Pontiac, Illinois. I'm just saying. Well, if this story has sent chills down other's spines,

I'm already, everyone keep your eyes on Christine because she might go into a panic attack herself. This story has sent chills down many spines and I'm still afraid of Mothman today. I can't even laugh at photos of Mothman's juicy ass statue anymore. Oh, that's a shame. That is a shame. I was going to say,

that's how you know things have gone south for you. It's terribly sad. Lauren says, I'll set the scene. I was house sitting for a retired veterinarian in the countryside

outside of Potlatchatch i potlatch idaho it was one of what oh i don't know that's just the craziest bumpkin potlatch is interesting yeah it's like i know it's idaho so it's already very midwestern but potlatch just feels like the official name of something on a crock pot, which also feels very Midwestern. Yes. It sure does. Very on brand. It was one of those new moon nights with thick cloud coverage that made the shade of night as thick as a quilt.

And I had just gotten into Webtoons and spent several hours just reading a comic on the couch with one of the cats. I think the cat's name is Baby Jesus. Wait, what? Oh, my. It says. You think or they think? Maybe all of us are wondering because the sentence is, I spent several hours just reading a comic on the couch with one of the cats, baby Jesus. I think the cat's name is baby Jesus.

Okay. I love it. Listen, I love it. Right? I'll take it. It's foolproof. Foolproof. A lot of cat owners worship their cats, so might as well just be direct about it.

All of a sudden, I got extremely paranoid. I felt like I was being watched. I was facing the window that looked out into the driveway and would have noticed any cars coming from at least a mile away. Then what I heard still haunts me. It was a loud whirling noise directly above the house with no warning. It sounded like a helicopter as if the propellers were made of skin. What? Am I on drugs drugs what's going on so baby jesus is there a propeller suit of skin like we're in leather faces mansion okay the writing the writing of this email is actually very detailed and i

it's shakespearean yes it is it's intense i can smell the skin on the walls i did read that right okay um it sounded like a helicopter as if the propellers were made of skin i feel bad because this person was like i can't laugh about this anymore and we're like and lauren how dare you think i know what propellers made of skin sounds like but i guess we're gonna work with it but like weirdly i'm like oh i guess i think we all kind of know though maybe it takes like a very mentally ill person to understand that um yeah i think we kind of great company yeah she assumed and she was right too i kind of got what she's going with i i went to open the front door and the noise stopped i froze and i don't know how long i stood there before i

opened the door to peer outside it was so dark i could barely see my car 20 feet away i couldn't hear anything so i went back inside but i could not shake the feeling that i was still being watched i decided to go upstairs and watch some TV to calm myself down. I smoked a little weed about an hour prior, so I thought that I was just paranoid. I got settled on the couch and felt my whole body go rigid and felt compelled to look out the window to my left. Right outside the upstairs window was a pair of glowing red eyes.

I turned my head back and said, there's no fucking way. I like to imagine at this point, baby Jesus went, yeah, like, it's just like, I'm not that baby Jesus. I can't help you. I cannot save you. I turned my head back and said, there's no fucking way and looked again to see the eyes even closer to the window. I ran into the bathroom that did not have any windows and stood there completely frozen with baby Jesus looking at me curiously. The window faced a completely empty field and there were no houses around for miles.

I called my boss who lived about 20 minutes away and begged her to come get me because I was terrified to go outside to my car by myself. When she got there, I didn't look out the window again and ran into her car, almost hyperventilating. I told her what I saw, but I could just tell that she thought I was being paranoid. I barely slept that night. And I told my friend Bryn the next day, who is the one that got me into your podcast. She demanded that i take her to the house to look around and when we got there and looked in the tree next to the upstairs window and found several broken branches we investigated the rest of the farmhouse and found nothing else out of the ordinary besides old newspapers with hitler on them what is going on in this story i feel like i feel like i feel like eva heard

live laugh larceny and was like oh my gosh this seems like the moment to pull out the wild i feel like eva has a secret filing cabinet that just says things like hitler and baby jesus crossover and just found a way to make it work the crossover sensation of the summer baby jesus this time it's personal jesus in one property this is wild uh anyways i still freak out whenever i see red lights out a window and will forever wonder if it was mothman who visited me and what he was trying to warn me about. Do you two think I saw him? Um, I got a lot of other questions before Mothman breaking the branches in your tree, man. I don't know. Yeah. Yeah. Wow. We have a lot of questions. I mean, okay. I, as somebody who has recently begun to partake more

in the THC of it all, I feel like 10 5 10 years ago i would have thought like oh well maybe they're just smoking and like smoking stuff smoking the toe but i'm like i i feel like as much as it can make you like definitely paranoid a little bit it can't really necessarily make you well could make you hallucinate but it doesn't sound like they had enough to to warrant like a full uh i don't know mothman terror attack i don't know what do you guys think oh i mean it's hard to tell but i will agree as somebody who has uh definitely loved that thc is legal in Missouri now. Yeah, I don't think it would make a person just, you know, make up seeing Mothman. It seems like hallucinations are a little extreme for what is happening.

For sure. So if I'm remembering correctly, maybe this was a totally different story. I feel like they're all starting to blur together and there's only two so far. But is this the one where they were house sitting for a uh event a retired doctor vet yeah maybe that was one of the animal maybe they had like a giraffe he just brought it home one day giraffe yeah i said velociraptor giraffe is better because it's real it's alive right now but um you're mostly because it's real listen uh maybe it was a giraffe you know no probably not a giraffe i don't know i thought it threw it out there didn't seem like it resonated with anyone so what else were the skin propellers i don't know that was this story? Holy shit.

And you know what we said in the last story, too, is that one also felt a little whiplash. This one really feels like I got thrown off a cliff from my car. This is Skin Propellers, Baby Jesus, Hitler. Also, somehow Mothman is at the bottom of my priority list with the story. Exactly. I know. When they said, is that Mothman? I'm like, hello?

Can we figure out where the hitler newspapers came from and if the vet like knows that they're there and also does the vet have anything to say about this animal in the tree uh all good questions all valid he sounds like a mad scientist oh yeah not a vetllers? Skin propellers. No sane mind could come up with that. I'm just saying. The writing on that email, that was beautiful. The quilt of night. Oh, yeah. It's poetic, really.

I know. I think they were indulging when they wrote it. I think that's where that creativity and that email. Maybe that's it, you guys. I see, I see. Because it was, you're totally right about the quilt it felt like it was a gradual letting us know this was going to be a wild time yeah night as heavy as quilt is like our darkness it's like i could have said it was dark but that's not what's going to

happen here so that's not the vibe that's not the aesthetic today to answer your question lauren i would like to believe that it's mothman i think it's very interesting that there are a bunch of broken branches in a tree where you did see something with glowing red eyes that is freaky for sure we're not just dismissing that i swear but i don't know what it would be i think i just have a lot of questions i can't focus i'm just glad you got out of that house yeah me too i'm glad it's not your house, I'm glad that this was at least you were just popping by, you know. I would suggest just not ever working there again. Yeah.

Hmm. Yeah. Just in case. Or maybe not smoking weed there, just in case. Totally. It's not a safe space, you know. It's not a safe, that's exactly right. It's not a safe space. That's so important, you know. Anyway, well, now we got to invite Trevin and Amandaanda now to tell a story oh my gosh yeah please go next yes please go next with whoever whoever wants i don't know duke it out bare knuckle box it out in the basement i'm gonna abraham lincoln you trevin okay i can't have anything to say to that. I'm just scared. Trevon got Abe. So I have a story, and it is from Lizzie with she, her pronouns.

And the subject is, my parents delivered flowers for a murderer. Oh, no. I'm already intrigued. Okay. So here we go. Were the flowers made of skin? Skin flowers. You can just hear them.

So it says, Hello everyone, pets, people, and lemons. My name is Lizzie Sheher and I have been a listener for a very long time and finally saw you guys live last year in Boston. I felt I was finally meeting my longtime friends. Anyway, here is my story. My parents owned a flower shop for a long time.

They had a regular, it says costumer, but I'm assuming that's customer. Oh, but that would be a fun twist. Okay, as a resident review reader of Yelp, as a resident Yelp reader, costumer almost always means customer. Is it? Yes, because people switch the vowels

and it's hard to tell. You know what? You would know. You would know from all those reviews. I sure would. What a weird skill you've developed. It's a weird skill. There was a time where I would say costumer and xandy and i would have a hearty chuckle it's no longer funny because it just happens so often that we're like okay they mean customer oh my goodness

okay yeah fun fact that's a common misspelling fun fact sorry to put you on the spot yeah sorry i just called out your spelling like no no but but you know what her parents flower shop her parents flower shop could have had a costumer who knows a costumer a customer okay maybe i'm wrong so um they had a regular customer he and his wife frequented the shop the husband was a well-known doctor in our town my mom noticed at times the wife would come in with bruises and she would try to talk to the wife but also felt it was not her place to pry as years as years went on the couple separated that's good uh yeah so far i'm on board yeah i'm glad they did that uh one day my dad got a phone call at the shop it was the husband he was asking my dad to

deliver a dozen roses within the hour to his estranged wife he was very insistent despite the delivery address being at least 30 minutes away my dad thought about it and agreed asking that he just pay an extra delivery fee for the rush. The husband agreed. Later that day, my mom was watching the news. To her shock and horror, the husband was on the news for murdering his estranged wife. Oh my God. The husband had sent roses to his estranged wife

and then later that day shot her point blank with a shotgun. My mom was distraught. She had thought he wanted to send the flowers to get back together with his wife she never would have imagined this jesus heavy heavy heavy the next day my parents were contacted by the police to write an affidavit stating what happened when they took the order my mom still tells the story from time to time. It really shook her up because they knew him for so long and would not have expected this. When my dad talks about it, he tells me that when my mom was on the phone with the police about the affidavit, he asked

that the husband when he was going to be paying his bill. I am not sure if my dad ever got paid for that delivery. I worked at the shop until my dad closed it and have some pretty funny stories. And thankfully none like this happened when I was a toddler. Thankfully none like this, this happened when I was a toddler. Oh, okay.

Holy shit. You had one era of childhood that was safe. I was like, Oh my goodness. And then it's from four on it was fucking wild wild west out there yeah yeah my bad and then it says um i love you guys i'm gonna be so excited if you read this story on the show p.s i don't want to give away my location so please don't read this oh part on the show okay she wanted to tell you something christine okay i'm gonna i'm gonna

scroll down and see um aha okay copy paste it's a suggestion for a future story so uh for everybody who's curious okay um i will bookmark that thank you no amanda that was like we gave you like the ultimate pop quiz like yeah we did this right now sorry we didn't warn you i'm sorry no no no i'm sorry i was trying to keep up but my goodness so that is a crazy crazy story about the flowers and then seeing it on the news and like were the roses sent as like uh that's what i wonder to get her to come outside that's heartbreaking so oh oh think about that you really do write a good story um wow you and trevin start the music we're tiny we're tooty we're all a little loony never mind m's got this one trevin turn down the

m's got it uh wow that is bananas i feel like uh wow you really just kind of threw me for a loop amanda with your like maybe that's how they were yeah he would have been trying to lure her out or it would have like left he obviously would have wanted her to see them in some way yeah yeah it was like a message or something i wonder well you guys would have no way of knowing this neither would anybody else uh but em and i just recorded an episode before this and um em told a story about somebody who died and when their body was found she was like holding a rose and i was like i wonder the symbolism of that so i don't know i was just a little weird i know maybe i jumped to conclusions but with the stories that we usually do there's not a lot of detail

it's just like a weird headline so So we have to draw our own conclusions. And then you get to fill in the blanks. Yeah. So for me, I was like, whoa, is that, I don't know. Who knows? Piece it together. Well, we try to fill in the blanks and we aren't quite as talented at it. I mean, I do think at the very least he was getting flowers to like leave at her door for her to open the door and then he could

grab her or maybe he really thought he could just go up and hand them to her and she would take them back or something i don't know right i mean it sounds like that i mean the fact yeah especially because the fact that they had to get an affidavit from the florist which means it was at least relevant enough that the police knew that delivery had happened that day that's so sad i feel bad for the mom too for lizzie's mom who felt like really the guilt of it that is sad she's like i wouldn't have sent these flowers if you know i didn't want to be a part of that yeah yeah that's too bad but it's not her fault my goodness no no no definitely not i don't think anyone's thinking about that story and going, that fucking florist. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

No one's thinking that. If only, yeah. I feel like people like that already have their mind made up and are, you know. Yeah, it feels premeditated when there's. For sure. Yeah. All right, Trevin. You got a big, big shoes to fill here.

Yeah, I do. let's see if you can spell it all out correctly trevin well this this listener story comes from a listener who has a name that i can spell and they're calling themselves a oh perfect easy she her okay uh subject is a brief compilation of my patients psychopomps icu edition interesting do you do you all know what a psychopomp is does anyone remember m you probably so a psychopomp is uh the the category of spirit that like the grim reaper falls into where it's like a spirit guide helping you cross over in some way or helping you adjust to death um so they're like in that sort of like that transitional state of like bringing from life to death okay okay okay okay would the

the first ghost and the christmas carol be like that? Yeah. Oh, yeah. Okay. Making it relatable. Thank you, Trevor. Making it relatable in March 1st. Christmas carol reference. All right. Hi, Em, Christine, Ava, all human for fruit babies.

And Laugh Larceny host. Oh, yeah, and me babies. And the LaughLarceny host. Oh yeah, and me too. And you guys. My name is A, and you guys actually read one of my previous submissions in the August listeners episode. I was the one who had my dead patient spirit follow me home.

An update. He has crossed the bridge onto better things than my two bedroom apartment. Yay. Oh, good. Okay. Excellent.

I'm so happy to hear it. Victory. This is sort of long, so bear with me here. Thank you. I'm an ICU nurse and listen to your podcast on my way home from work to de-stress. Something about hauntings and murders are really just zen to me, and every other listener, you know? Anyways, I just finished the episode where M does a breakdown on psychopomps. I've never really heard of psychopomps before. I grew up very painfully Christian and really had no idea what they were until M talked about it on the episode.

As they were explaining psychopompsps something in my stomach started feeling weird i was uncomfortable and didn't really know why and then it clicked as an icu nurse i've been in the same room with several psychopomps who have helped my patients cross over but i didn't know what they were at the time freaky right right i would say so given my job what did the youth say bet i was just gonna say glizzy but i don't think that makes sense what's that is that a thing glizzy a gun it's a fancy word for a hot dog what a gun what am i thinking of i don't know a glock this is a hilarious conversation glizzies and glocks that's you know hot know. Hot dogs and guns, yeah, my favorite combo. My sister's name's Elizabeth, so sometimes they call her Glizzy Lizzy.

Glizzy Lizzy! Wait, that's actually very cute. Given my job, unfortunately, I do have several patients who step into the next life while in our unit. Looking back, almost every single patient i have lost has mentioned seeing someone something or most commonly a childhood pet who is welcoming who is welcoming them to move on what's it like to know that all of your pets are just psycho pumps in the making oh well geo is out there right now bitching at me through the door and i'm ready to make him a psycho pump so you know what what's it like to know that the dog that you know what you just hate this

door is open I was about to go open the door and then I looked over it's open he's just sitting there bitching at me because he's hungry and wants a treat you mean your escort to the other side one day is bitching what escort to hell has something to complain about better feed that

escort pay the toll Itching? What? Escort to hell has something to complain about. You better feed that escort. Pay the toll. Pay the troll toll. Sorry, Trevin. Sorry. Okay. I was just trying to figure out if that was like a merch opportunity or something.

Like future Psycho Pomp or something. Oh, future Psycho Pomp. You guys have to do it. Hey, let's remind everybody by putting a sweater on our dogs that they're going to die before us. That would be a great merch idea, guys. See, that's the hard thing about our type of true crime entertainment is like, how do we make this

funny all the way through? Because it always has a bad root. That's why you guys found, like, I mean, genius. Genius. Genius. You must sleep so much better at night. Anyway, I mean, genius. Genius. Genius. You must sleep so much better at night. Anyway. Pretty well, actually. Okay.

Passing on. Move on. Okay. One of the most memorable was a patient I had who was very, very close to passing. The room was very quiet and solemn. And all of a sudden, she opened her eyes super wide, smiled, and said, Eleanor, you made it. The patient passed immediately after.

This made her family laugh and cry really hard, and they told me that Eleanor was the patient's daughter who had passed in childhood 20 years ago. Shut up. It was her daughter? And they actually wrote, Cue Waterworks. No, seriously. For sure.

I'm following the stage directions. A few weeks later, I had a patient who was actively passing, but kept asking me to pull up an extra chair at the side of his bed. I found one for him and brought it in. Did they sit on it? No, it's not for you. It's not for you. Get out of that chair.

Get out. But nobody in the room needed a chair, so it sat empty. Or so I thought. The family was prodding the patient and asked him why he needed the extra chair. The patient said, Gwen is here. I imagine she'll want to sit because of her knees.

We're just going to talk for a bit and then we will go. This cute little... This cute little peepaw had asked me for a chair. Peepaw! Peepaw! Pe for a chair i guess that's just driven's like this cute little peepaw do am i required to say those words this cute little peepaw it does sound very whimsical but i just wanted it sounds to be honest very missouri to me. It does. I'm just saying. Hey, Peepaw. Meemaw, Peepaw, Meemaw.

The biggest twist of this all is that I actually did call my grandpa Peepaw, and it just feels really uncomfortable. It feels weird to say it as an adult. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. It's just too close to home. I've never seen it spelled out. I don't think I could read back when he was alive. So I've just never really seen it spelt out.

It is kind of a weird way. Is it like P-E-P-A-W? Yeah. Or is it? P-E-P-A-W. Because like, yeah, I feel like Meemaw. I mean, I don't know. Yeah, Meemaw was his wife.

Really? You had a Peapaw? You had a Meemaw? That's so cute. Yeah. I feel like we just roasted your grandparents who have passed, apparently. Meepaw, meemaw. No, no.

He's totally fine. I think I was the first grandkid, so it was probably me who made the names up, honestly. It's a great name. I've been trying to get my mother-in-law to be meemaw for the longest time, and she has a mug that says best mother-effin meemaw, and longest time and she has a mug that says mother f best mother f and meemaw and i'm like i love she was like no i'm grammy and i was like wait let's go back to meemaw but she's from missouri yeah give me that mug back yeah but she's from missouri so i figure you know she she seemed to take to it pretty well oh yeah yeah just saying yeah i wonder if my mom

will be a meemaw my parents are gg and papa so gg's a classic yeah yeah my mom swears she wants to be nanny and then she says because it makes her feel young and i'm like that's not right that's that's that's kind of okay those go against each other well both of her grandmas were nannies so i think she wants to be like a nanny i mean nanny's a cute one yeah that is cute i just never thought of that one i'm gonna call her fran drescher right he's you know that would be more accurate actually pretty apt for nanny franny that would work nanny fran love it oh classic okay sorry trevin we have we have derailed you 85 000 times this person's in the middle of

their grandfather actively passing and we're just laughing well it's not their grandfather it's their patient but oh the patient the patient still close still close still not still not fun anyway i'll start back at the cute little peepaw okay thank you for that this cute little peepaw had asked me for a chair for his wife that he lost two years prior due to covid she had arthritic knees and even on his deathbed, he wanted to make sure she could sit and take a rest before helping him cross to be with her. Cue waterworks again.

I have also had several occasions where patients start petting the blankets on their bed, saying that their childhood dog, cat, or even guinea pig came to help them move on. It's such a surreal experience. Not knowing anything about psychopomps previously, I can say that I have a new perspective and maybe even feel comforted

in the fact that it seems to be at least someone who comes to help you at the end of your life on Earth. This was one of my sweeter stories. Next time I'll have to write in our ICU, room 5, and angry spirits that that live there or the ghost in my parents' house that gave my mother a concussion. But those stories, as I'm sure you've assumed by now, are for another time. Ominous music. And then he goes, just kidding. Here they are. No, I can't take it. I can't take another one. No, if there was a second one, I'd be covering it right now. Yeah, you'd be on it already wow okay wow

wow wow okay psycho pumps um i'm so glad you reminded me because i know you talked about psycho pumps and i kind of jokingly was like oh i've heard of that but i i guess i didn't totally get it yeah i feel like in my episode it like almost normalized the grim reaper because he seems like such a standalone almost like villain i think it was we talked so much about the grim reaper was that the topic you did that day it was grim reaper slash psychopomps one okay okay because i think it didn't occur to me it could be a fucking guinea pig also yeah which by the way was everyone else busy only your guinea pig had a free day but like you're like edna no just your fucking guinea pig i've seen a meme before where it's like imagine being the little kids in the orphanage and

parents come and they buy Stuart Little instead of adopting you. Like they just get a fucking mouse. A fucking rodent. Yeah. They get a mouse over you. And it's like, imagine you're dying and the only person who thought it was important to come collect you was your guinea pig. Your little rodent.

Yeah. It's like, who's there? And it's like, it's Scruffles. It's like, no, not Scruffles.

At least the family dog. No, he was busy. Is that you grandma? No, grandma's got, grandma's got Ares tier tickets. Sorry.

You know, I am curious though about, I'm curious about Meemaw's knees because you would think in the afterlife like maybe her knees didn't hurt anymore and like so maybe maybe he didn't know because it sounded like he said he was like preparing a chair for her maybe he didn't like maybe she hadn't arrived yet right and he was like oh she's coming and she might want to sit uh christine already knows the story but i one of the first ghosts i ever saw was my grandpa and i saw him and my cousin saw him separately and both times we saw him with both of his legs

and he was an amputee so right it is it is interesting it's like oh so you just like recollect all the limbs when you get somewhere else like a sponge and was he older like when you saw him as a ghost he yeah he i was i was so young i don't know if i knew how much younger he looked but he looked like a young old if that makes sense like he was maybe like middle of life yeah i feel like the one that i've heard the most often um is that people is like a middle age kind of like in the prime of your like adulthood sort of yeah i feel like i'm surprised by that because i would think like you get to pick like whatever age you remember being the happiest or you want your spirit to reflect or something maybe that is i don't know that probably is it i mean i i think that would be it i feel like i'm a lot i mean

i don't know i speak for myself only i guess but i feel like in my 30s i am much happier at this point in my life than like 21 like i don't want to be i don't want to live as a 21 year old ever again i don't want to be a 21 year old ghost that would be way too wild no so i mean maybe breaking things in someone's bar trying to get like a solo cup like just i'm wearing like that forever 21 shirt and it keeps falling and i'm like trying to safety pin it it's like it's just too much work i don't know and all you can do is make facebook statuses that are just really emo lyrics oh my god and it says like christine can you show them your shirt currently no what does it say what you're wearing it says someone in fallout boy loves me and it's true and it's real. Oh, I love it.

It's true. It's not a phase. It's real life. It is a lifelong phase. It's a lifelong phase. It's a lifelong trauma or whatever. Oh, wait, no, that was from a different episode that we just recorded. Sorry.

Cut that out, Jack. That inside joke won't land with anyone because it happened before Amanda and Trevin even got on the call. Before we were even born. When you were a sparkle in my eye a twinkle in my eye i'm pretty sure aren't we older than you i'm sure i don't know i don't know you seem more youth you see more with it than i am so i just assume i just don't have kids maybe you guys are the youthful ones i don't know i'm the trevin of and that's why we drink and you're the m of live love larceny that's exactly i gotta tell you not having kids wait hold on you're say it again you're the sorry oh you're the trevin of and that's we drink i'm that's the truth you're the oh no and amanda is the christine of live love Larson. I'll take it. Did you know my middle name is Christine?

It is not. Really? It's with a K, though. So I know. Boo. You can boo. No, no. Now that I live in Kentucky, every time I say Christine, people are like, K-R-I?

And I'm like, no. I feel like certain cities are like, oh, C-H? And I'm like, yes. Interesting. Kentucky, they're a K. They just think everything yes interesting they're they're k they're k they just think everything needs to start with a k interesting yeah yeah it doesn't start with a k f or a c i don't want it i don't that's what i'm always says you know what's wild is my middle name is trevin oh hell although that would be something that would be absolutely uh this would be kismet if that was

that would blow my mind away oh oh boy okay i think it's your turn again christine oh you're right you're 100 right okay this one is called mysterious wooden box on Box on the Dining Room Table, Dash, Open at Your Own Risk, which really does sound like a Fall Out Boy song title. It's very long. It has a lot of punctuation. And weirdly enough, the entire email is like 10 lines. So I feel like it is like Fall Out Boy. So was it lyrics? Is that what we're getting to? It might be a song. Hold on, Trevon. Play me in.

Play him in. Please don't make me sing. It's going to be bad for everybody. Don't make me sing. Don't make me sing. Oh, me? Little old me? Okay.

This is, wow. Okay, preferred name and pronouns. Stuart? Okay. Little? Oh, my God. not that little sorry formerly orphaned my pronouns are formerly orphaned that sounds like a fallout boy line I guess it's about time that I tell you

I do have a box of wine here and I did I've been very ill for a week so I haven't had any wine in a week so if I'm acting a little bit if I'm acting a little bit loosey goosey that's why I will also

Em's like not loving it I will also m's have m's like not loving it okay uh i will also add real quick that uh i have a quick question and i feel like i'm still on for seriously i'm still there too. It's not funny. And there's other people here. So like, I can't keep going the way that I usually want to keep it together. You don't have to do anything. They're trapped. We're trapped in this call and you can do whatever you want.

You can literally do whatever you want. What were you saying, Christy? What was your question? Okay. So I feel like I should scream for Eva, but maybe not. I'll ask you what you think, Em. It says preferred name and pronouns, and they wrote their full first and last name. Do I say the whole thing? No. No?

Okay, it says preferred name, and it's quite a name. So I thought maybe they want like the pomp psycho pomp and circumstance surrounding if you don't say the last name we're just gonna think it's stewart little though at this you're right that's part of the problem i think should we just go with stewart little now at this point just okay stewart okay uh apparently according to m and amanda we are rejecting your preferred name and pronouns and calling you stewart little only I just don't want to triangulate them. That's the only reason for their safety. Okay, fine, fine, fine, fine, fine. This is Stuart.

He, him. Thank you, Stuart. I just want you to know, Stuart, that I appreciate your beautiful hyphenated last name. I think it's like quite a powerhouse of a name. So I'll just put that out there. Yeah. Mysterious wooden box on the dining room table open at your own risk. Heads up.

That's how this email begins. Heads up. Okay. This story is not paranormal in any way. Okay, hold on. I feel like I have to. What are we doing here then? Okay. I don't know.

I don't know. We'll find out. Crime, maybe? I don't know. Heads up. This story is not paranormal in any way but is 100 true and so still worth telling you gotta love when people uh insist that their story is going to be worth right they're like stick with me so stick with that stick with me it'll be worth it uh in the early

2000s i was a grad student at the university of toronto btw m and i are going there oh wait it'll be over by the time this comes out. Never mind. I was going to say buy tickets. Old news. Old news. Hope you were there, Stuart Little. It would be great to see you. Or not see you since you're so small.

We wouldn't have been able to see you. You're so small. This poor guy. Okay. I was a grad student at the University of Toronto living with three roommates at Graduate House Residence. One night I came home after a long day and night in the lab to find a mysterious wooden box sitting on our dining room table. I mean, this really sounds like Jumanji already. I'm so excited. Hey, Shravan, someone's coming for your spot.

I know, I'm getting deep, bro. How many more are you? My first thought was, I have got to take a look. But then my gut kicked in and said, leave it alone. So I feel like that was your guardian angel. Maybe. Your psychopomp.

You're getting big. Your psychopomp was like, don't fuck it. We're not ready yet. Yep. So I went to bed, box untouched. The next morning, talking with my roommates, I found out one of them was studying anatomy

and so had brought home a specimen for further study. If I had opened that box alone and in the darkness the night before, I would have found a human skull. Oh my God. That's me. Hiding my own commentary. Whoa. Just one more piece of proof to say, if you find a mysterious wooden box on your dining room table late at night,

just leave it alone and go to bed. Loving the podcast. Was so excited to hear your story on the University of Toronto. The next time you come to Toronto, M, lead a ghost tour slash investigation of the U of T colleges. I would be there in a heartbeat. Keep it creepy. Stuart. That's very sweet. That sounds like a lot of work though to be honest um but i uh m's like i'll attend a ghost tour if you set one up i'll go yeah stewart i think that you maybe have

more to offer no offense to m but like you're kind of like from there, you know, you can tell us about the box again. Yeah. Yeah. I feel like I would. OK, quick, quick poll of the room. Who would have opened the box? Raise your hand. Yeah, I would have opened it.

Yeah. As long as it's not moving. Trevin, raise your damn hand. Oh, I have to actually. There it is. Free for three. You have to raise your hand. I'm on an audio medium, I thought. You know what?

It doesn't count. It doesn't count. It doesn't matter. You know, there was one time, we've talked about it, everyone but the two of you, their ears were bleeding because we've talked about this so many times on the show. What? like out of a horror movie a full-blown wooden crate we had to pry open full of hay with a an old haunted doll in it with a note without a return address that said no return setting our barn on fire we don't know what to do with it what did you do with the doll well we put it in my closet for many years because we we literally didn't know what to do because we thought well we can't put it in the trash can like that can't be good right and like it was at my house that we opened it so em was like not my fucking problem and i was like

you're right but also tire tracks left the driveway i was like the subaru was out of there uh but yeah i i feel like um there's no good there's no good answer when body parts arrive in your home and you don't know where they came from. I do wonder first, I wish Stuart, Stuart, can you, if you, oh shit, see this comes out afterward, but I really want to know from Stuart what he thinks he would have done if he did open it and see a skull. I would like to know in an alternate timeline if Stuart's little nagging voice didn't get to him.

If he did open it, would he have screamed? His little stewart if you will stewart little stewart that seems you know oh you're right yeah so what i would have done i would have opened up the box i would have seen a skull i would have put the lid right back on and done like the keep your eyes open and your ears open but your mouth shut. I saw nothing. Just like you almost like rewind, right? Like you put it on, you lift it up, you're like, never mind. Bitter lip. Regret that. If no one saw me lift the lid of that box, no one knows I saw what's in the box.

And that's how the rest of my life is going to play out. And Trevin, you said you also would have opened the box, right? Yeah. Because to me, you seem like the most like maybe the wisest it's probably because you're the least loud and so i thought maybe you'd be like the least likely to open it but if you would it makes me feel better about myself that you would also open the box well i'm a curious little cat you know i see yeah you know what aren't we all and that that that's that's a beautiful thing. And Amanda, you would have opened.

Trevin, you are giving energy that, like, we'd all open the box, but we would look to you for what to do next. That's exactly it. I feel like Trevin would have allowed us to open the box and then probably said something like, I told you guys that wasn't a good idea. And we would have believed you, even though, like, you totally. Even though you just gaslit the shit out of us. You were, like, ring-leading the whole thing. You know what? Now I'm mad at you, Trevin. You know what, Trevin? Let's you trevin what's the matter with you i do really like people to kind of make their own decisions but yeah i

would take the blame too yeah okay all right all right well the next time one of us brings a body part home i guess we all know how it's gonna go down we're all gonna be pretty i'll be like you now what your turn now what do i do i mean if it was really up to me i'd say like maybe just two of us make the decision to see it first before making everybody see it right to spare the others okay that's fun but i would be so i'd be pushy i'd be like i'm gonna be the one with trevin who gets to look at it first um i for sure would yeah and then i'd be like m you'll never believe it then I'd be like, Em, you'll never believe it. But you can't look at it,

but you'll never believe it. And I'll never tell you. And I'll never tell. But it's the craziest thing. But you'll never know. Trevon and I have gone through something together. So like, am I jealous that you bonded? Am I not? For sure you are.

For sure you are. That's part of it. They have a trauma bond. We've trauma bonded. Okay. We got one last one um according to what i see so far in the subject line this is going to be a slam dunk ending for our episode that's what i call the the finale the march madness of it all uh what is that what the subject line says just slam dunk ending slam dunk ending the march madness of it all yeah it's also in aisk, nothing but net is what it should be.

Oh. Okay. Eva's calling a shot. For some reason, Em and I find basketball phrases to be like the funniest thing. And it's like, there's no real good reason, but it's just one of our love languages. Yeah, I'm also someone who can't tell if a glizzy is a gun or a hot dog, but I do know a lot about basketball headlines. I don't. Terminology. We a gun or a hot dog, but I do know a lot about basketball headlines. I don't.

Terminology. We actually have an inside joke on our show. My wife, Emily, she thought the saying going hard in the paint is going hard in the pants. Oh, my God. Oh, no. I like Emily. She sounds cool. For the longest time, she would say, oh, Taylor Swift really went hard in the pants on that album and i'm like no that's not what we're talking about you're like yeah nothing but net

i gotta be honest trevin you have just done a number to me and now i will only be saying it that way in my day-to-day so a great scene get ready for that phrase i'm prepared hard in the pants so here we go uh the title is my ex was in the dugger cult which um oh no context for the two of you i'm obsessed with the duggers in a really unhealthy way um at least you own it i i would i thought I would have to kind of give the like face of, but it's in an unhealthy way, but you seem to already be aware. No, I know where I am. Self-aware. Okay. I really, I am

probably their biggest anti-fan fan, if you know what I'm saying, where I'm just like the fascination will never tire. It's sort of like train wreck. You can't look away yeah the kids keep the kids keep coming you know yeah i get it it's like true the kids can't the kids the kids with the j names keep coming that's what i learned um there's always new info yeah we're always counting it never ends nailed it uh the never mind i was gonna make a bad joke okay going on uh this is from kelsey who's a she they pronouns love a double pronoun thank you for normalizing pronouns and kelsey says emphasis on x my x was in the dagger cult since i do not want to be associated with that man anymore fair enough kelsey uh but he grew up in the same homeschooling program as the duggars which by

the way is called ati advanced training institute i was gonna say m fill in the blank thank you i gotcha um he grew up in the same homeschooling program as the Duggars that was run by Bill Gothard, their cult leader. Bill Gothard would talk one-on-one with him and put him on such a pedestal that gave him too much of an ego since he was such an alpha male. Yikes. My ex was so close to the Duggars that he got chicken pox from them

during a joint trip with his family. I know exactly who this person is. No, you don't. What? I remember the episode. You know this person? who this person is no you don't what episode you know this person was this person on television kelsey because there's a whole episode where the duggars had family had family friends in town and like 50 children got chicken pox all at once okay oh my god anyway uh i'm so glad i'm out of that relationship since all he wanted was a housewife and refused to clean our shared apartment.

Big fan of the show. I think you mean our show, not their show. And I've been here from the start. Big fan of the show. Not yours. Yours sucks. But I love the buggers. I get it.

And that's it. That's the whole thing from Kelsey. Wow. What did I say, folks? Buckets. That's the whole thing from Kelsey. Wow. Wow. What'd I say, folks? Buckets. Nothing but net. Nothing but net.

Hard in the pants. From downtown. From downtown. That's a new one. Em's going to take that and run with this. That will be the thing I say from now on. Yeah. From downtown.

Oh, God. Okay. Wow. Wait. Wow. Okay. So. So you think you might know.

Well, I mean, there were 50 kids that got chicken pucks, but you've seen the episode where there were family friends. There's 50 kids. 20 of them are the Duggars. So that immediately drops my elimination process. We can narrow it down a little. Yeah. Yeah. I don't know if it was. I don't know if the family was actually on TV,

but I remember in the episode, I'm pretty sure they say like, oh, we just came back from a family trip with insert family name here. Oh my God, so at least he's been like referenced in the Duggar sphere. I think so. Unless I'm totally making it up.

I'm pretty sure. I don't doubt it. I feel like, I mean, I do, I don't think you're making it up i mean i'm pretty sure i don't i don't doubt it i feel like i mean i do i don't think you're making it up i feel like um i feel like somewhere there may have been a blip i feel like they recorded so much of their bullshit somewhere there's got to be a blip about this chicken pox epidemic i remember it being there was another episode too i'm hope i hope i'm not confusing them there's another episode where like family friends were in town and they all got the flu at the same time. Can you imagine taking care of, it was 38 children with the flu? Can you imagine?

Absolutely not. Can you imagine being the fucking cameraman who's getting paid like fucking pennies and you're like, now I have to be in this room with 38 children with the flu? Well, what I love about those, and by the way, it was the stomach flu. So it was just stomach flu so it was just vomit everywhere oh my god could i tell you something so horrid that you're just gonna want to sign off immediately sure sometimes eva does this and i'm like you know what you're doing eva when you when you set us up like this at the end of the episode at there's a fucking okay go ahead there's a scene the children get the stomach bug and literally they're like the parents are

leaving like cups of water to like give to the kids to like drink some water one of them throws up in the cup and then leaves it on the counter no i can't i can't no i can't stop they left that in the episode oh yeah and like the best part is his wife imagine that's good tv fucking the best part is his wife and i hate that it's good tv in this like in their religion slash cult um like the wife is so submissive like barely has a personality you just don't know anything about her except that she's there just like smile and nod and make her husband feel like he's the only just like kelsey oh just like kelsey could have kelsey could have been but but decided probably for her better right well so my favorite thing is it's the only scene they this show went on for

years and years and years and years and it's the only scene where his wife is like hysterically laughing because like her husband just shows children vomit yeah oh the husband oh i thought it was another kid it was jim bob oh jim bob good that's good i feel better about that i feel better too thank you it was a little deserved um anyway now that's good tv yeah i'll end on that that's justice that's justice that's a round of applause story right there wow wow the fact that somebody wrote in to say that is talk about petty i mean listen i love live laugh larceny i've listened to several episodes but i'm also very behind on all my podcasts but i feel and so correct what i'm saying is correct me if I'm wrong but I feel like someone getting chicken pox from the Duggars feels like a very live laugh larceny type of oh yeah like right like just kind of like a ridiculous store petty story like believable and I think it's kind of petty you know for them to

then send the email in which I love I love which is even better. Yeah. A hundred percent. A hundred percent. I love that so much. That's beautiful. That's just beautiful. Wow. What a way to round out our stories. Yeah.

Happy March, everybody. That's how it's, hopefully none of that happens to us. March madness. It's madness. Oh yeah. I didn't even think about that.

It is indeed madness. Thank you, Eva, for the stories, but thank you also, both of you for coming on and reading with us thank you we appreciate it so much for having us yeah we're we're honored to have you sorry em go ahead i was gonna say can you shout yourselves out anywhere people can find you

oh man well we anywhere you listen to podcasts live laugh larceny and we're on instagram tiktok threads we're on facebook i mean we're everywhere wherever you know but yeah definitely if you're into the petty stuff we would love to get i'm sure that your listeners have really good true true petty crime stories that's the thing i feel like em and i like when eva said oh there really weren't that many submissions of like petty crimes in our inbox i was like what a what a yeah it feels like a missing piece like you guys really brought brought us a topic or a theme where i'm like man that is that's a gold mine right there i feel like i hear in in our stories like they're never the actual like topic people are landing on.

But I feel like in the writing, you can hear the attitude of some of the people and you can tell they're petty people. In the best way, by the way, because I'm beyond the pettiest. Right. It really is Em's vibe, for sure. Oh, yeah. I love petty stuff. This show keeps us so in like finger on the petty pulse every week we know what's going down and just like living in the atmosphere of petty has like

made us more petty i think wait i kind of love that uh i when while making this show uh i had i was getting evicted and i formed a band in a day just because they were going to do an open house through my house so i set up a whole band because they were going to do an open house through my house. So I set up a whole band practice to do a concert for the open house. You sure did. Fuck yes. We kept the realtor from actually doing it.

Fuck yes! Our protest worked. Be still my heart. Are you kidding me? I probably wouldn't have done it. I've never been more impressed with someone. Em is actually almost at a loss for words which I think has never happened

so wow we made fake posters for the show and called our band Perpetual Eviction yeah so like that's petty you know it doesn't have to be anything crazy just you know just like be a little petty it's fine

I'm gonna go check out any merch that you have. But if you don't have a shirt that just says, I'm the pettiest bitch you'll know, you'll ever meet. I need that shirt a thousand percent. I think you can only make one. We'll send you. And it's for you, Em. Yeah. Anything petty, I'm just going to go look and just see what you have and do a little shopping.

There you go. Anyway, thank you guys for coming. I really appreciate you guys on our show reading our stories and uh for our listeners we'll see you in april on april 1st april fool's day but oh boy i don't know what that means neither we never come up that's the fun of it that's the fun of it none of us know we'll see what happens it's only non-listener stories people who don't listen to your show oh now that's the fun of it that's the fun of it none of us know we'll see what happens it's only non-listener stories people who don't listen to your show oh

now that's interesting I think you're about to become one of our consultants for the show what's happening here what's happening here all right we'll see everyone

on April Fool's Day I will be listening I'll be telling stories with my favorite fool and oh that's you.

And Oh shit, okay. That's why Oh, we're doing it? Oh no, no! Would you like to jump in? Let's all say drink together. Okay, okay, okay.

And that's why we to me it was a beautiful harmony i don't know what everyone else will hear but to me it was absolutely perfect i felt the vibrations thank you trevin with all your music background i'm gonna need you to make that sound like a like an orchestra