Andrew Schulz's Flagrant with Akaash Singh - Adam22 a Cuck, Jonah Hill Allegations, & Keke Palmer Controversy

Episode Date: July 11, 2023

Yerrrr we're back and the boys are talking about Andrew's irritable bowels, Alexx's big news, Adam22 & Lena the Plug, Jonah Hill's text messages & boundaries, Keke Palmer's Usher serenade, Elon suing Zuck's Threads app, and much much more. INDULGE 00:00 Alexx commits to the thing he loves most 02:38 Power-washing pooing + Hot Hole Action 13:24 Pilot Pooing Prevention + Andrew is really American 16:19 Who understands food? Where you ranking Indian? 20:44 Akaash LOVED Greece 22:33 Tour guides love being racist 24:03 Worshipping nature + go where the rich people go 27:34 You need the mandem at St. Tropez 28:35 Robin Hood for info - Bernie Schulzers 31:55 Dov is connected + Not taking no for an answer 37:03 Alexx smuggles mom INTO Mexico 41:03 Dov really is Jewish 45:24 Mark prefers upstate NY to St. Tropez 48:43 Zelensky will love this segment 50:13 Mark, Mushrooms, Pink Floyd & FEAR 57:23 Free Jonah from these whales + NOT ABUSE 01:07:12 Andrew jealous + sl*t buckets are haram 01:12:20 Why you playing a man’s sport? 01:13:03 Backflipping trendsetting 01:14:09 Jason Luv’s meat ain’t that big 01:18:18 Destiny radicalised Adam22 + kill a story with a story 01:24:13 Alexx’s HOT TAKE 01:29:36 Musk suing + end goals for Threads & Twitter? 01:41:32 Do you wanna see the Musk + Zuck fight? 01:45:58 Colleen Ballinger got BARS 01:50:58 Ain’t no women on To Catch a Predator 01:54:11 Women allowed boundaries 01:57:49 Respect Black QUEENS + Usher Revival 02:02:50 Africa is a continent + new Usher lyrics 02:04:58 Jay-Z built like a Boogie Board 02:05:39 Roc Nation v Illuminati? Rubin’s White Party 02:17:47 Tom Brady is smashing the brakes out of Kim K? 02:18:49 Thank you Allah for Salma Hayek 02:24:13 Alexx’s Mom fed Mexico + Mmm-ing Middle-Agers 02:26:41 50+ can still get this meat 02:27:32 Gay Voice Defence 02:30:35 Love you WeezyWTF

What's up everybody welcome to flagrant we are back we're back from vacation with big news big news alex media has committed the rest of his life to a white woman everybody welcome to the squad you know what i'm saying that makes three of us okay first of all you did propose Two of us. Two good dudes. Come on, Mark. Get in here, Mark. Get in here, Mark. I'll do it on the back side of your hand, the darker side. Come on, my boy. Okay, first of all, you did propose. I did. Yeah, that's cute.

Like a complete psychopath. You didn't tell any of us that it was going to happen. I got to, you know, surprise. Surprise us? Yeah. It's better that way. You guys were super hype. I mean, we were hype.

I was super hype. That was great. We were hype. We were hype. Y'all were more excited than she was. She wasn't excited? No, she was expecting it. She definitely was expecting hyped. That was great. We were hyped. Y'all were more excited than she was. She wasn't excited? No, she was expecting it. She definitely was expecting it.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Because she... Shut up. What? Why is that? It's good to get one off early. I did. I did.

I was going to say, in the picture you posted, she was ready for it. Yeah. In the best way. Her nails were done. The whole thing. Her nails were done. Like the whole thing. Her nails were always done. Yeah. And then I tricked her by saying, oh, let's just go take a picture. And then while she

was posed for the picture, then I got that. Hold on, hold on. So she knew that it was coming, but none of us knew? So you saved the proposal for us? You proposed to us, really? Come on. Thank you, bro. I didn't put people on count. He proposed to you. He surprised the boys. Also, it's funny that you were like, she knew I was proposing, but I tricked her by saying, let's take a picture.

Like, you don't think she thinks. She didn't know when it was coming, coming. She knows during the trip it's going to come. How many times in your relationship have you said, hey, let's take a picture? I don't mean to pry, but that's not a super thing men do very often. You might have a point there. So she knows she's getting proposed. I'll be taking pictures all the goddamn time, bro.

I just never posed them. No, but hey, let's pose for a picture. I'll be taking pictures, but he's like, hey, you and me, let's get in this. Nah, she likes to take pictures.

She's a picture person. She's a picture person, not you. Okay. Yeah. Listen. Don't give us a fuck. Nah, it's a fun story.

Did she help you pick out the ring? No. Okay, so there was some surprise there. It was a hell of a ring. Okay. Well done, dude.

Thank you. Shout out to fucking WTF Media. You know who's paying for that. Okay, Wheezy. Every time when y'all propose, my wife's ring looks smaller and smaller. That shit irritates the fuck out of me. Stop getting married. Is your wife going to ask for the upgrade or what?

Nah, because she's so small that I kind of lucked out. First of all, my small hands can only deal with such small hands. But a small ring, a big ring would just look obnoxious, like too big. At least that's what we've convinced her. That's a good point. That's a good point actually. Stay locked in. Okay, listen, we all came back from vacation. Akash was in Greece.

Greece. Having a great time. I want to go through what everybody, Mark, you went to nature. Did you go upstate? Bro, I went upstate. Mark went to Albany. It was Albany. I went upstate

and brought him back with me. Exactly. Yeah. All right, and then Al, you were in Cabo. Yeah. Okay,

and then me and Dove went out there to Europe and Asia. We went to Asia as well. You know what I'm saying? We did. We went to Europe and Asia. Anyway, we're going to go through know what I'm saying? We went to Europe and Asia. Anyway, we're going to go through it.

I just want to say real quick before we get into it, I just want to say this. I'm incredibly lucky. I'm the luckiest person on the fucking planet. I have this amazing career and I get to work with my friends

and it's the best fucking thing in the world. And I have a woman I love more than anything in the world. And I'm so lucky and I get to work really hard. I work seven days a week and I'm the luckiest guy on get to work really hard. I work seven days a week and I'm the luckiest guy on the fucking planet. Okay. I work seven days a week and I'm grateful that I get the

opportunity to work so hard on something. And then for a couple weekends a year, right? Two weeks in the summer and then two weeks in the winter, I take a vacation. That's what I do because I work so fucking hard, right? Absolutely. But I'm lucky I get to work that hard. I'm not saying I deserve it, but I'm lucky. And I take that vacation. I take two vacations a year. They're in the summer, one, and then in the winter, the other. So there's two times where I get to go away. Did you mention you work hard?

No, no, no. I work really hard. I do work really hard. I work really hard. That's awesome. I'm lucky to work that hard. Do you know what I'm saying? It's a blessing that I get to do it.

I'm not saying that I earned anything. I don't deserve shit, but I do work hard. Do you know what I'm saying? It's a blessing that I get to do it. I'm not saying that I earned anything. I don't deserve shit, but I do work hard. Do you know what I'm saying? It's pure gratitude. But for some reason, every time I go on vacation, I am just power washing toilets with diarrhea.

Every single time. Now, I don't know. Listen, I'm grateful I get to even be on vacation. You know, I'm grateful. I am, I'm not, this is not coming from a lack of gratitude. I'm grateful that when I'm on

probably the most expensive hotel on the whole of Malafi Coast, I am power washing toilets from the beach to the restaurant all day, nonstop. And I'm doing that for four days straight. I've been having diarrhea,

today included, for six straight days. I'm talking to your doctor. I'm talking to anybody four days straight. I've been having diarrhea, today included, for six straight days. I'm talking to your doctor. I'm talking to anybody who will listen. Looking skinny. Six straight days. Honestly. You're looking skinny.

You can eat whatever you want in Italy and then just shit it out. I thought that. I hit the scale. It's a problem. So I got the diarrhea that just gains weight. I got a different type of, you know, there's like a good Hopkins and a bad Hopkins. I got the diarrhea that just gains weight. I got a different type of, you know, there's like a good Hopkins and a bad Hopkins.

I got the bad diarrhea. And I'm just gaining weight and then pissing out of my ass. And let me tell you something. It burned so bad that I had to hit the group. But no, no, no. When I say that it burned, this is fucking crazy. I am doing diarrhea, right? Yeah, yeah, yeah. I am doing diarrhea. Right?

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm doing diarrhea. Doing diarrhea. I'm diarrhea-ing. Doing diarrhea. Doing diarrhea. Mark is queuing up a song or something. No, no, no. I'm pulling up the group chat.

I'm pulling up literally the group chat. No, no. I am shitting. Okay? I'm doing diarrhea. And again, this is every 15 minutes. Just peeing out of my ass. Okay?

Just pissing. But like with power. Just fucking. you hear it. Like a dove urine stream. Literally. I mean, just fucking going for it. It becomes so painful. It's so hot.

I thought we had some little spicy tuna or something like that, and we had a little spicy tuna and it had like an aioli that was maybe spicy when we were in France, right? Maybe that caught up, I won't say, it was so hot. It was so hot. At one point, it started to get so hot that what I would do is I would shit, and the second it would come out of my ass,

I'd jump and I'd reverse cowgirl the bidet, and I'd just, I'd hump the bidet and I'd shoot the cold water, right, into my ass to cool it down. I would have a soaked rag that I would stick in between my teeth, right? Then it was nice and cold, so I could just cool it down.

I had to constantly cool it down, but it was so hot and then I'd go back to the toilet and I'd shit it out and through my taint, it was pulsating. My button lips were pulsating. My button lips were pulsating. My taint was pulsating. It would not stop.

It was painful. And I was on the toilet and I started. Every time I shit, I would just go, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha the fucking desk people and the concierge came. I don't know if they thought I was being violent with my wife. I don't know what it was, but they knocked on the door. They're like, is everything okay? Is everything okay?

Is there anything? Because there's a screaming. And what did you say? I was saying, there is a mutiny happening in my body. There is a mutiny happening in my body. I don't know how to explain it. So hot.

I somehow get through the night. I go upstairs the next morning to, the desk is two Italian women, okay? Yeah. And then the concierge is an Italian man. And then the owner of the hotel is walking this way as well. I'm a little too embarrassed to admit to the Italian women

that I've been diarrhea-ing for the last two fucking days nonstop. I go to the concierge, and I go up to him, and I'm really quiet. I go, hey, do you have anything? You know, my stomach, I have a little bit of diarrhea. And they go, what, what, what do you have? Diarrhea, like I started saying.

Diarrhea, right? If it's an Italian accent, I understand. And then they get it. Diarrhea. Now, Italians are two things. They are helpful, and they're loud. Loud, Italians are two things. They are helpful and they're loud. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Which is a horrible combination, when you have diarrhea. This guy, knowing that I'm fucking whispering to him, goes, oh, you have the diarrhea. Maurizio! Maurizio, what can we do to fix this shit

to make it stick together more? Oh, you have to take the dolce formita or something like that. There's like a specific type of diarrhea. They're having an out loud interaction near the check-in. Guests are checking in. And I'm just like locked in between this

as these Italians are screaming back and forth what I have to take. Other people in the lobby? Oh, eight people in the lobby. Eight people in the lobby minimum. The rest of the trip is them coming up to me going, how is the diarrhea? Is everything good? Did you take the lemon and squeeze the lemon and take one shot of lemon? They're little fucking home remedies to fix my diarrhea. Is everything good? Did you take the lemon and squeeze the lemon and take one shot of lemon? Like, they're little fucking home remedies to, like, fix my

diarrhea. Bro, believe the name because, but, but yeah. Let me say, not only was it the worst fucking diarrhea I've ever had, he's there, okay? He's at the

hotel, okay? Which is like a cool thing. And I have my compliment that I'm going to give him that has nothing to do with what he's good at, which is a nice way to go in. You're the best comedic actor of any athlete. When the moment presents itself, I'm going to do it, but I'm not going to force it. Famous people let them have their fucking thing.

We're walking to the hotel. There's a tunnel that's bored out of the rock to go to this hotel. It's a, we're walking to the hotel. There's a tunnel that's bored out of the rock to go to this hotel. It's a fucking 50 yards. Emma and I walk in. Walks behind us and passes us, right? So he's on his way. Looking like fucking.

He got the fucking sunglasses that got the little thing. I love that. He got the hat. I love it. He got the hat that got the tie here. And the hat is hanging, the sunscreen on his nose. He is fucking, he is from America. He's dead.

He is from America and he wants everybody to know. He's not trying to hide who he is. He passes us. An elevator opens. He knows we're also going to the elevator. Goes into the elevator.

I can hear him slamming the closed door button. We call that goal line defense. Bro, goal line defense on Emma and I getting into it. Slamming the fucking button like this.

Bro, we get to. That's hilarious. We get, we get. We actually, I see how much he doesn't want to have this interaction. So I wait for a little bit. The door doesn't close with his slamming for another five seconds. So I go, fuck it, we're going in. Yeah, you sack him.

We go in. We're in the elevator. The elevator is the size of this fucking cage. It is so small. It is so small. You know, elevators in Europe are terrifying. They're so small. We get in the elevator.

As we walk in, he puts on his hat and just tucks his face like this. Like we're not going to notice it's fucking a 6'6 quarterback. Yeah. Forehead from the lobby. Yo, I felt it. As he walked by. Bro, and it was just the most uncomfortable thing.

You didn't say a word? He saw your compliment coming. He didn't want to deal with it. He didn't want anything. I wish you powered through, though. I know. I wish you just looked at me and were like, honestly, man. I did say something. Nah, I think the hotel. I wish you just looked at me and were like, honestly, man. I did say something. I did say something. I think the hotel snitched on you.

Bro, they might have snitched on you. He was afraid of the diarrhea. Maybe he thought it was contagious. He could have been worried about that. That is a good point. I'll give him that much. Or he didn't know you had diarrhea, had the room next door, and thought you were just getting fucked in your ass.

I mean, I was getting fucked in my ass. That's true. For the last six days. And why didn't you just share it in the group chat? At this point, I was desperate. I was desperate. For what, though? Al stepped in. What was Al's advice? Mine's fixed it. What was your advice? His advice was, I started to Google his advice, and he's like, bro, take

Vic's vapor rub, shove it up your ass. He had this fucking dumbass advice. That's how I go to bed every like, bro, take Vic's vapor rub, shove it up your ass. He had this fucking dumbass advice. That's how I go to bed every night, bro. Come on, man. Did you have any close calls where it's like you couldn't make it to the toilet? Oh, yeah, and the way you shit, buddy. You know, like a Paris bed, you know?

No, no, no, no. I mean, I was concerned on the way back because I tried to risk it. I was taking Imodium to just pack it in. And it was working. And I was concerned on the way back because I tried to risk it. I was taking Imodium to just pack it in. And it was working. And I was at the airport and I took my first hard shit in days. And I was like, oh, I'm better now. I texted him.

He's like, all good. And I was like, what'd you do? He's like, I just stuffed myself with bread and Imodium. I was like, you're not better, dude. You just stopped yourself from shitting for a little bit. My wife also said that. She's like, you're not better, dude. And I was like, yeah, I am.

Let's go get a fucking gelato. Right? So we went to Benchi, which is in the airport in Rome. It's amazing. And we got a nice gelato. And I had that. And I had four slices of pizza inside the lounge. Because I figured that's what you eat right when you overcome brutal diarrhea.

Did you pop the champagne? Did it just rip out? I popped the first hard shit, golden. I'm like, I'm good. I get on the plane. Hard shit again. I'm like, I'm good. I get on the plane, hard shit again. I'm like, this is great. Nope, two corks. Then right after the hard shit,

it was followed by a soft shit within the same shit. I'm like, this isn't good at all. I'm back in there 15 minutes later, power rush on the back of this fucking toilet in the airplane. There's no bidet though. Bro, it was so bad that the pilots needed to poop, but they can't leave the area unless it's free so they could block it off. So I got the flight attendant banging on the door going, sir, you need to get out of the bathroom. The pilots need to use the bathroom. They can't use it if you're in this area. I have the diarrhea.

Yeah. And I got out and it was so bad. She had to brew a pot of coffee. I have the diarrhea. I, and I got out and it was so bad she had to brew a pot of coffee, pour the coffee into the toilet, into my ass,

into the toilet to get rid of the smell. There's no way. This is every time I go. Every time I go. I went to Columbia, same thing fucking happened to me. I went to St. Bards,

same thing fucking happened to me. They pour coffee into the toilet? She poured a whole fucking thing of coffee to get rid of the smell. She's like, I got it for you. Don't worry. I went to St. Bards, same thing fucking happened. They poured coffee into the toilet? She poured a whole fucking thing of coffee to get rid of the smell. She's like, I got it for you. Don't worry. This happens to a lot of Americans when they go to...

I'm like, whatever, lady. Thank you so much. I've never heard that. She's trying to make me feel better after I shit for 30 minutes in the bathroom. How do you get third world diarrhea in a first world country? Bro, I don't fucking know. These French people do. And we had the same meals as him the entire time. Was it turkey? I don't know if you can blame the French for this. He first blamed sushi

at the best place in San Tropez and we're like, no, we good. They ate the same thing. Nothing happened to them. It just happened to me. Same thing happened in Colombia. It's the bread. Yeah, because you don't eat bread when you're out here. I eat bread every day. I just say I don't eat bread. I'm like you with white women.

White woman! Hello, white woman! I mean, dude. This is like your period. It happens twice a year, and you just get fucking cranky and you're shitting everywhere, and it sucks. Four announcements. Amsterdam, we're coming.

You thought we weren't coming, but we are coming, okay? October 17th, we're gonna be there. Amsterdam tickets are on sale right now. Go right now, theandrewschultz.com. Go get those tickets while they last. October 17th, we're there. Glasgow, sold out.

Thank you so much. Manchester, sold out. London, sold out. Thank you so much. Dublin, we still got some tickets left. Go get those before they're gone. Theandrewschultz.com. Thank you all so much. I appreciate you. Can't wait to get out there. Peace. Also, guys, tour dates. First of all, thank you so much. All three shows for the Houston

special taping are fully sold out. We appreciate the fuck out of you. Also, July 12th, I'm going to be in Huntsville, Alabama. July 13th, 14th, and 15th, I'm in Nashville. That's this week. And the 13th and 14th are already sold out in Nashville, so hurry up and cop tickets for the 15th. Also, south of Burlington, Vermont on the 20th, Albany, New York on the 21st. Guys, get your tickets to all those dates and more at alkaisting.com. Now let's get back to the show.

And what does your sweet wife think? I mean, you guys are on vacation finally. You're not working, you know, one week out of the year. I mean, the first half of the vacation was absolutely phenomenal. It was amazing. Solid, just firm. So great. We're in Bodrum.

Firm. Yeah. It was just fucking phenomenal. But the back half was just, I don't understand why it happens to me every single time. Every single time. I think you don't understand food, man. You don't know what you're eating and what you're not eating. This motherfucker, tell me about Greece. I'm telling him how beautiful it is. He's like, how's the food? I'm like, man, we haven't understand food, man. You don't know what you're eating and what you're not eating. This motherfucker telling me about Greece,

I'm telling him how beautiful it is, he's like, how's the food? I'm like, man, we haven't really found anything good yet. He goes, I think you don't understand food. I do think that. And that shit, it's so insulting when you say that. And I'm so happy that you don't understand food. Your body is like, get this out of here.

You don't get food. You don't get food. You're used to eating slop. There's a difference when you eat like refined cuisine. It's the best food. Tell me that's not the best food. Indian food? Indian food. Best food. It's up there. You could say it's debatably the best. The best slop. It's slop. It's good slop. Compare that to prison food.

If you need to feed two billion people, it's a good job. Just compare it to prison food? I say compare it to slop slop. They should give it to the people in prison. There'd be way less butt fucking. There'd be way less way in prison if they just had Indian food there. I think it's good to the people in prison. There'd be way less butt fucking. There'd be way less way in prison if they just had Indian food there. I think it's good to feed two billion people.

You need to do that. You can mass produce the food. It's good. But it's not like the elites. Nobody's going, oh, my God. Oh, it's elite. Y'all crazy. It's elite.

It's fried and it's butter. You're going to do okay. No, that's not all fried. It's cream and it's butter, really, if you knew anything, white boy. What is butter? What is butter? Yeah. Milk, cream. It's not fried. So it's just butter and butter. So your boy what is butter what is butter yeah milk cream

it's not fried so it's just butter and butter so your whole cuisine is just butter so it's Italian food you've been working them cows and then acting like you don't fucking

abuse them that's why we don't eat them you know what I'm saying that's the interesting thing y'all be sucking the life out of them cows but you won't eat them just eat them yo

handle them out double down put them out of their misery yeah real talk we need them that's crazy it might be more abusive what you guys do you guys have turned them? Just eat them, yo. Hamble them out. Double down. Put them out of their misery. Yeah, real talk. We need them. That's crazy. It might be more abusive what you guys do to cows than us.

You guys are turning them out for 20 years. We need them so we don't kill them. That's it. Need them so you don't kill them. Yeah, we need them. We need the milk.

We need everything. We need every part of this cow don't kill it. Yeah, it's not like, oh, you're God. It's like, we need a slave. You're a slave. Yeah, no, the God is buttered.

The God is buttered. Yeah, that's the God that would agree. And better are slaves than you're slaves. That's true. Sla God is buttered. The God is buttered. Yeah, that's the God that creates. And better are slaves than you're slaves. That's true. Slavery's bad. Slavery's really bad,

even when it's a cow. Okay, that's a crazy statement. Yeah, that was great. Wait, who said the crazy one? You said they're slaves. What am I supposed to say? They are your slaves. They're your butter slaves.

Yeah, okay. You have butter slaves. And then my response is valid. But you're also like, we cows are gods, but you wouldn't enslave God. Well. Cows are sacred. They're not God. They're sacred. They're sacred. Okay, alright, fair enough.

Listen, point being, the food is Indian food is okay. I don't know if anybody ever puts it. It's elite food. It's a thing white people love saying they love Indian food. That's a thing. We love it every once in a while. Okay, I'll give you Italian. It's elite food. It's a thing white people love saying they love Indian food. That's a thing. We love it every once in a while. Okay, I'll give you Italian.

It's like fun every once in a while, not every day. I'll give you Italian. What else? What's really like, oh, for sure. French, French, French.

Shut the fuck up, French food. French baked goods. Come on. French food. I mean. I mean, yeah, steak frites, come on.

I mean, you wouldn't know about either of those. Steak frites is just steak and fries. It's not French. You can't just give it French words. Keep doing this because then you'll realize you don't know food if we keep talking this out. French food, overrated.

Wildly overrated. But what I think you're going to realize is you're going to keep overrating the best food, and then you're going to be like, oh, maybe I don't get. No, I gave you Italian. I gave you Italian. Right, right, right. Greek. Greek food, phenomenal.

Oh, Hispanic over there. It's the same thing, bro. It's the same thing, bro. It's the same thing. I'm going Indian over Greek. Thank you. Indian over Greek? Over Greek, yeah. Come on, son.

They're not doing enough. Flavor's India for sure, but. Have you been to Greece? Yeah. No, I haven't. I've never been to Greece. Yeah, but they're not doing enough. Now, to be fair, I haven't been to Greece either, but.

What about fresh fish? You know what I'm saying? That's not a group. You, to be fair, I haven't been to Greece either, but what about fresh fish? You know what I'm saying? That's not a group. Can't claim fresh fish. They invented fish. The Greeks invented fish. If you ask the Greeks, they'll say we did invent fish. No, they invented everything.

They invented everything. They invented everything. Greeks invented Indian food. So technically, Indian food is Greek food. They actually did. Alexander the Great made it all the way to India, probably gave you anything good about your cuisine, to be honest with you. What is that?

What is that? Oh, God. That's why I went this way and not this way. You know what I mean? I very consciously chose to go vertical. I thought you were doing Alexander the ****. Okay, okay, okay. While we are talking about vac vacations i want to hear each of your experiences then later we can get back to ours greece you loved it you were in love with it i had no idea how beautiful it was that sounds stupid probably but like not at all santorini i was like holy

shit i'm in a postcard this is fucking unreal the water's like immaculately blue the houses are all white yeah because that they didn't have AC, so that just reflects the sun the best when it gets hot. Oh, is that the reason? Yeah, and then the roofs are all blue, and I think that's because they're Greek colors. So it's all white houses, blue roofs. And it's just like picturesque on that side.

Then you turn around, and it's a beautiful water on top of a cliff from a volcanic eruption a few thousand years ago. These volcanoes be doing some ill shit, bro. Yeah. You know, once the land rebuilds, it's fucking gorgeous. Mykonos, still beautiful, more fun than Santorini.

And then Athens, I really did feel like, all jokes aside, I was like, oh, this is like Europe's India. Like, they're super ancient. They're very proud of their culture, very proud of their heritage. Tons of history you go. And when you talked about like seeing the pyramids,

this is obviously way more recent, but still the Parthenon is like 2,500 years old, 500 years before the Colosseum, Tons of history, you go. And when you talked about like seeing the pyramids, this is obviously way more recent, but still the Parthenon is like 2,500 years old, 500 years before the Colosseum. And it's fucking like, how did y'all do this? And then really, I kept thinking about the Graham Hancock episode. I was like, yeah, man, humans. It's 2,500 years old?

2,500, 500 years before Christ, 500 or 550, I think, BC. Wow, bro. It's insane, dude. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And then we went to this place. We did like a tour. Like, we're going to take one day. And it's amazing.

It's like set on the top of this, like, I don't even want to call it a mountain, but maybe it is, right? And most of it is damaged from, I think, oh, yo, yo, they also fucking hate turkey, by the way. Oh, yeah. Turkey and, yeah. They loved Indians because we side against any Muslim. So we're like, yo, Greece over Turkey. And he kept being, the tour guide kept being like, we love you. Please don't leave us.

Son, can I tell you something that's so interesting about European tour guides? They be up front with their racism. Yo, it's crazy. There's no professionalism. They don't see it as racism. It's like sports. It's literally like football. My guy in Turkey was taking us around Istanbul, and he straight up said, he was like, yeah, you know, in Turkey, this is like an educated, thoughtful human being, right?

Like, we could talk about philosophy, history, whatever it is, right? He's traveled the entire world, and he does these tour trips, not just in his own country, but all around the world. Like, he's very well-read. And he just goes, yeah, the one people we don't like here, it's just Arabs. And I go, wait, what? And he goes, yeah, it's we don't like here it's just arabs and i go wait what and he goes yes yeah it's the arabs like anybody can come to istanbul we welcome anybody you know what i mean but when the arabs come it's always a problem and i go what do you mean

they do not fuck with Arabs. And I go, where does this come from? And he goes, it probably comes from World War I. During the Ottoman Empire, the Arab states were controlled by the Ottomans. And they sided with the British. Okay. So they kind of like turned their backs against the Ottomans, I guess. And then, you know, Turks, they don't forget, my boy.

Petty. Petty king. They do not forget at all. This whole region don't forget. Greeks still upset about shit. Bro, they're furious. Armenians right now is like, fuck all of them. Bro.

Oh, another thought I have. First of all, Parthenon, mostly destroyed, still gorgeous. But we did like a whole day tour. So they drove us like an hour and a half outside of the city. And my wife and I for a second were like, is this like a hostage? What's going on right now? Why the fuck are we in the middle of nowhere? Then he took us to the Temple of Poseidon, which is a temple built for Poseidon on this beautiful water, this beautiful landscape.

And I remember thinking, if you see this beauty this is why you think there is a god of water because this is so fucking gorgeous if you look up temple of poseidon you're like there has to be a god for just this yep it can't be one god doing all that and then this is so beautiful it's fucking unbelievable i if i should have sent videos but like that was like i was like oh i see how this is a polytheistic country, religion, whatever. Yeah. I was like, this is unbelievable. So that's the temple.

And then if you look at the water on the other side of the temple. Yeah, you build a temple for whoever made this. No question, there's a god of water. It's just like, you can't believe anything else. All of Greece is like that from what I saw. Yeah, that's a good point. If you don't worship the nature, your nature sucks. Yeah.

That's really what it is, dude. Yeah. If you're not out here having deities of the sun and shit, it's like, oh, you don't get any sun. Yeah, there's no sun god in Scotland. Yeah. Which maybe if they worshipped the sun more, maybe there would be more sun. Maybe they'd get a little sun. Yeah.

That's what they're missing. Bible bells are all ugly. Yeah. And so they believe in Jesus because Jesus can do all this. Yeah. I mean, one guy can handle that. Do you guys have a water god in India? Is there like an ocean god?

No, we don't have a water god. We don't have gods of things. That's the problem. India don't have the natural beauty that Greece got. That's the problem, dude. What's the mud god, Snaps? That's too far, dude. What is the mud god?

What is the mud god? What's that one mud? What is that one mud guy? Squirtle? Who's the god of Scottish women? The god of Scottish women is probably fucking Dumbledore or something. They all look like him. They look exactly like that motherfucker. I think that's the mud guy.

I think it's that guy. What is that one? That's muck, dude. Shout out to muck. Dude, that's the McDonald's shake. That's what I thought. The Grimace. Okay. what is that one that's muck dude shout out muck dude that's the McDonald's shake what is that grimace yeah okay

so Greece is just absolutely stunning dude I couldn't and I think you I kept texting you I think you in particular would love Greece it has a history

it has a natural beauty I think you would wasn't too busy in the parts you were at though we went to like yeah we just Shasta Sudip our tour guide

who I think is about to be your travel agent or our travel agent I mean but he just booked the whole thing and he was like just do the hits Athens, our tour guide, who I think is about to be your travel agent, or our travel agent, I mean. But he just booked the whole thing, and he was like, just do the hits. Athens, Mykonos, Santorini, you're going to be fine. You're not going to be like, oh, this is too, it's great. And we planned it on very short notice, if y'all remember.

Yeah. So he just handled everything, and we just, it was great. I know you went to Crete. Yeah, that shit was fire. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But the hits are hits for a reason. Yeah, that's also true. Like, that's the other thing.

Like, when you're planning these vacations, there's two things you never go wrong. One with the hits, two where the rich people go. Rich people don't work, so their whole life is figuring out how to distract themselves in the best way until they die. So they invent like Saint Tropez and it's perfect. They figured it out. They found the most beautiful place. They kept it away enough from people.

And then they built all the beautiful restaurants. They learned, they know how to party. Like they figured the whole thing out. Does it freak you out though when you're in that environment? Like when it's like full like White Lotus vibes? And you're just like, all these people would fucking murder me in one second if they could. If they benefited them, they would all murder me. No, no.

You don't care? No, I don't, because I don't even look at them like that. Especially in a place like Saint-Tropez, it's like everybody's so isolated in their partying. Saint-Tropez, for me, would be great if we had a big group. If there's eight or ten of us, you go there, you have your own party that's within another party that also has its own party. Do you know what I'm saying? Yeah.

Yeah, I think so. It's like you're not all partying together. Yeah. It's the eight of you are partying while other people are partying. And you feel comfortable being loud because they're also loud. And everyone has enough money to get their own thing. And you don't have to feel like there's an in-group in it. They figured it out.

They figured it out. There's a reason why rich people go. Yeah. Because they cannot that's true they cannot go their life is a vacation their life is a vacation yeah and you they need these fun things to distract themselves and greece has parts of that where you went like mykonos and santorini is a perfect example of that you know where you have great partying unmatched beauty to a beach bar and i was having the time of my life at a bar.

Drinking fucking virgin mango juices or whatever I was drinking. But that's the vibe, though. Also, it's like the day party. Yeah. That's perfect for you. Let me tell you something. Can I tell you something about these fucking rich people, bro? Tell us, bro. You know. Let me tell you about

these fucking riches, bro. First of all, in any shit that I learn, you already know I'm telling you. Rich people hate me. Every tax thing, I see that one tax thing about how rich people pay cash for their shit without actually using cash. I see that go viral. Let me let you all know. Anything I learn from a rich, I'm telling you immediately. Fuck these riches, bro.

And other people. Exactly. I'm telling everybody. Nobody's going to be rich. We these riches, bro. Man of the people. Exactly. I'm telling everybody. Nobody's going to be rich. We got an inside agent. When it's up to me, nobody's going to be rich. Okay.

So this is the thing that they figured out, bro. They made the most fun partying shit acceptable for old people. Like the day party, day party exists because these old

rich motherfuckers can't stay up until one in the morning. They're not up until one. Do you know what I mean? Like they're up until 11. So you're partying at lunch on the beach from noon till five. Maybe you take a nap and then you go to dinner and then you're partying

until 11. It's early. It's condensed. Can you go out late? Sure, with the young and the poor. But the rich needs a sleep before they go. The beauty of partying in Europe in the summer, and I'm telling you this, I'm almost like, if you're young, don't go. Don't go, because you'll ruin it for yourself

when you're old. You go there when you're old, and it's like, oh, I don't feel like the old guy at the club. You see young people there, and you're like, what are you doing here? It's like seeing an adult in Disney World without kids. You're like, what's going on?

That's young people in the club. Not women, by the way. They don't count as young people. Young men. But women's ages don't change. There's one thing that stays consistent. Women stay 25. They stay 25 years old.

But in Saint-Tropez, the clubs are taken over by 16, 17-year-olds. That's their rite of passage so that they want to keep coming back later. Go have fun at your little clubs. And they come back when they're old. Go have fun at your little clubs. I'm drinking a nice white wine from Provence. I'm in bed by 930 blasting through the sheets. Let's go.

Okay, I'm telling you. I got diarrhea. I have a gut biome issue because I'm an old man partying in Europe in the summer. Oh, fuck. It is,

it's so fucked. Thank you, riches, for figuring out life at an older age. Is there a health focus, you think? They're all trying to work out and shit and they don't want

to be up all night? Some of them are like that. Some of them are like, some of the riches, they're like, I need to stretch out this richness. Yeah, try to live forever. Yeah, there's the live forever riches, but the real riches, bro, they're like,

I need to get to hell already, bro. I've done enough bad on this earth. They smoking bogeys, bro bro they don't give a fuck there are some of those riches I feel like that's the new riches that are like I need to stretch this thing out

the Jeff Bezos's and such but the old riches the generational riches the generational riches are just like bro I've been rich so long I don't need to be 90 were you hearing family names generational riches. The generational riches are just like, bro, I've been rich so long. I don't need to be 90. Were you hearing family names? You were like, oh.

I'm trying to think. No, not really. Or like a job that anyone would tell you like, oh yeah, that's the guy from whatever. I mean, Dove knew every single human being that walked in there before you even walked in. Oh, of course. So was he lacing you up being like, oh, this guy, whatever, whatever? Dove is texting me random things that are just like so out of my scope of reality. He's like, oh, this guy, whatever, whatever? Dove texts me random things that are just so out of my scope of reality.

He goes like this, I'm full day three diarrhea. I have to make sure I'm within 30 seconds run from a toilet at any point in time. Your Dallas Fire Club. Yeah, it is bad. It is bad, okay? It just made me have AIDS. I would have taken AIDS over what I had to do it.

And a mustache. Dub just messages me and he goes, there's this guy that is in his super yacht in Capri and wants to know if you're willing to take a helicopter ride from your hotel in amalfi to go have lunch with him in copry on the boat on the boat that's fine i mean that's that's a good text what an asshole dove is no no like i'm like what a fucking wild world this is that like that's a different level of wealth. Where they're like, I'll just send a helicopter to you,

and then we'll retrieve you, and then you'll come to my boat and have lunch, and when we finish the lunch, we'll send you back. That's true. Round trip, guys. And the only thing I think of is, I ain't making it on a helicopter in 30 minutes. You're about to spin the whole clock, bro.

There is no way. Fucking Napalm in the fucking Vietcong. We coming in hot! Then I'm texting the billionaire. He's got some stomach problems. Maybe. I told him straight up. They got a pot of coffee on that helicopter?

I bet you it worked. Wild. He was killing it. Wait, so you didn't go? I feel like. Oh, dude, he was killing it. Wait, so you didn't go? Let me tell you something. No, I didn't go. I didn't go. I didn't even move off of the property.

I didn't even move off the property. There'll be other opportunities. Unless they can lift the toilet out, dude. There's no way. It was. Yeah. Yeah, it was. It was crazy.

But no, Dub was in his fucking. It is. Dub did this most amazing thing. This is his element. Like, this is most amazing thing. This is his element. Like, this is his true gift. This is what he's, he's great at a lot of things, but what he's truly great at is

not taking no for an answer. This is what his true skill is. This is what his true skill is. He, he did get laid. This is awesome. This is what his true skill is. Please elaborate on that. Not taking no for an answer. That's great.

It sounds crazy, but this is amazing. It's like he wants the no. It's like if we called for a reservation somewhere and they just said yes, it'd be like, come on, what is going on? This place is beneath us. It's beneath us. Why would they let us in? You know what I mean?

What type of pathetic place would allow us to be there? We need to manipulate the situation. It didn't matter what it was. The place is closed. There's not enough food left. There is a fucking atomic bomb. It wouldn't matter the situation. He is finagling and moving and grooving and saying,

I don't even know what the guy's saying that I'm doing, because I know it's coming back on me in some way, and probably bad. Do you know what I mean? Because he's using me to lie. He's lying about me to get into the places. Yeah, you owe someone something. Oh, I know. I know. We're going to be in Prague

one day, and a guy's going to come up to me like, where's my fucking hundred million? You got to perform for my daughter's bar mitzvah. But he's always played the part. He just doesn't question it. Just stand in the corner over there. I stand in the corner. Every door open.

Unbelievable, every door. It was truly mind-boggling. That was fun. Great job, though. Excellent. Great. Yeah, we're now talking about it wasn't about a girl it was about

no no no reservations a girl a thing to go into and that's cause that's cause they always say yes right

yeah yeah did they say yes nah I got nothing yeah I didn't see I didn't see too many women in these pictures

I watched Jewish matchmaking I'm focused now. Really? You're saying you didn't see women with Dove? With Dove, yeah. Because we came with our watch. Yeah, I was going to say. It was like two couples and Dove. And I was wondering. Shout out to Jason. I just want to say hi to Jason. You're the

greatest boat diver I've ever seen. That's so good. I was crying. I was almost as bad as Al. Bro. It was worse than that. His was worse. I was almost as bad as Al. Bro. It was worse than that. It was worse. Because Al gave up. Jason tried and failed.

Jason was full body meltdown. Dude, Jason tried and his whole foot just gave up. You knew he was Jewish just from the jump, dude. You could see it just in the way his feet were moving. I probably watched that a hundred times. It's also funny because you had a backflip, impressive, duh, perfect dive. Oh, yeah. And then it was like the second time I watched it that I saw feet just at this angle.

I was like, what the fuck is happening? And there's a moment in there where he just gives up, and that's my favorite moment. You see this moment? Yeah, he just goes like this, and he's just, ah, fuck it. Like he's trying to turn it around. He goes, no, it's not going to happen. Yeah. Okay, okay, okay.

So tell me, tell me, tell me. Al, Cabo. Cabo. Cabo. So I smuggled my mom into Mexico. Yo, okay, okay. So tell me, tell me, tell me. Al, Cabo. Cabo. So I smuggled my mom into Mexico. Yo, this is crazy. How? Because her passport didn't come in time. And I was like, nah, we going on a strip.

So me, I'm doing all my little research. Does she know you're proposing? AKA YouTube. Yeah, she did. That's why I really wanted her there. And also, she's never been to Mexico before, so I wanted her to be there. And so her passport didn't come in time.

I'm doing a whole bunch of research in terms of all these real IDs, enhanced IDs. Can we cross the border? So I figure out that we're going to fly to LA. We're driving to Tijuana, hopping on a plane. Once you're in Mexico, you can travel just with an ID. So we did that. Get to Tijuana. Fly to Cabo.

How'd they let you into Mexico without a passport? They don't check anything when you go into Mexico. Nobody's trying to sneak into Mexico, bro. Well, you are. Yeah.

No, but I mean like, nobody's trying to sneak in and stay. Yeah. They don't even ask for your passport when you drive across. When you drive across, they don't ask for anything. Okay, so how do you get back?

That was the issue. So now, same thing on the the way back and now we're in this long-ass fucking line waiting to cross the border And that's where it's like my mom's freaking out in the back, but I'm telling him like mom I seen two YouTube videos when I did this They were good we're gonna be good and so we get to the finally get to the border whatever they take all the IDs I going to be good. And so we get to the, uh, finally get to the border or whatever. They take all the IDs. Um, I purposely don't give my passport because I was like, let's two of us not have passports. So we'll be all right. Um, yeah. So he just pulls us up in the system. He asked her, he's like, Oh, have you ever been to Mexico before? She said, no. And he's like, all right, cool. Have a good day. Wow. So wait, you said you lost your passport or? No, I just didn't come with it because like, if you're driving, especially in New York, we have enhanced IDs. Wow. So wait, you said you lost your passport? Nah, I just didn't come with it. Because if you're driving,

especially in New York, we have enhanced IDs, you're allowed to drive across the border. Does your mom have the enhanced ID? Nah. She just has a regular joint. Yeah. We gotta secure the border, bro. Yeah. But that's what I'm saying. But everybody's in the system. So it's like once you pull up the person's name, you see the face matches,

you're good to go. Oh, oh, oh, oh. So she had some form of ID. Yeah, she has a driver's license. Got it, got name, you see the face matches, you're good to go. Oh, oh, oh, oh. So she had some form of ID. Yeah, she has a driver's license. Got it, got it, got it, got it, got it. Oh, my God. It was an hour of waiting in that line, just like fretting. I'm like, fuck, are we going to have to do another 28 days or something like that? Oh, no.

What would you have done if your mom got stopped? You'd just stay in Mexico? Yeah, yeah, yeah, because we had some more days of the vacation. We'd be like, eh, good content. Fuck. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, that's ballsy dude, yeah So the reason why My girl knew about the proposal because I was planning on doing it

I fly to LA a couple days early forgot the ring at home No, so I'm like fuck the whole situation that I was gonna do I'm not gonna be able to do it My mom was already saying that she wasn't gonna come because the passport wasn't there. And so I'm like, nah, ma, you coming. Cause if you come, then you can go to New York, get the ring, bring it.

So that's why it was like, I told my girl, I was like, fuck, I had a plan to do this or whatever while we were there, but I forgot the ring. And then I had my mom bring it. So it's like, that's why she kind of didn't know that it was gonna happen. She thought it wasn't gonna happen. That's why you wanted my mom break it. So it's like, that's why she kind of didn't know that it was going to happen. She thought it wasn't going to happen.

That's where you wanted your mom to go. You were willing to risk your mother going to prison in a foreign country. I wanted my mom to have experiences, you know, to see. When I saw you post, the first picture you posted was you on a yacht with your mom. And I'm in Bodrum and this. I was like, I'm such a piece of shit. Al is taking his mom on trips on yachts. It was so good. Thank God you proposed. I was like, I'm such a piece of shit. Al is taking his mom on trips on yachts. It was so good.

Thank God you proposed. I was like, okay, that makes more sense. That's so funny. I saw that. I didn't feel like a piece of shit at all. I was like, this is exactly where I'm supposed to be right now. I'm supposed to be right here. My mom's supposed to be where she is.

That's how you know you weren't raised Jewish. That's how you can tell. You have that guilt. Because you have another woman that you promised your life to. Oh, that's also true. You should have brought your mom. Yeah. Why didn't you bring your mom? Yeah.

I'm going to bring my European tour. Are you bringing your mom to Scotland? Yes. Fuck. I'm going to bring my mom to Morocco or something. Are you going'm bringing my mom to the Tel Aviv show. I'm bringing my mom to Morocco or something. We're going to Tel Aviv? Why Tel Aviv? She's not from there. She doesn't have any connectivity to that.

Should I bring my mom to Tel Aviv? My grandparents are buried there. Her father. Oh, Dove pointed that out so fucking fast. When we were in Israel, bro, when we were in Israel. We're on the fucking, what is it called? The Olive? The Mount of Olives. Oh, yeah, the Mount of we're in Israel. Dude, we're on the fucking, what is it called? The Olive Walk? The Mount of Olives.

Oh, yeah, the Mount of Olives or whatever. Oh, my grandparents are buried here. My grandparents are buried here. Listen to how cheap these people. Both of them are in the same casket. No. They got a two-for-one. This isn't true. They got a two-for-one on the fucking Mountain of Olives.

This is a 69-ing forever? This is a crazy situation. What, dude? 69-ing forever, dude. That's crazy. That is crazy. A two69,000 forever, dude. That is crazy. A two-for-one, bro? My grandma is buried in Mount of Olives. My other grandpa buried somewhere else.

You can't be buried in Mount of Olives now. That's how sacred it is. Really? When the rapture comes going to happen there, they're going to take you out first. Piece of shit. All right, guys, we're going to take a break for a second. Now, listen, you already know that Morgan & Morgan is America's largest injury law firm. And we know that Morgan & Morgan has a proven track record of fighting for the people with over $15 billion recovered for their clients.

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The content is great, dude. You could have been in Saint Tropez with us. You could have been hanging out. slash flagrant. Rules and restrictions may apply. Now let's get back to the show. Mark, tell us about the wilderness, okay? The container is great. You could have been in Saint-Tropez with us. You could have been hanging out, but instead you decide to go to the wilderness. Just to save money. I think I have two more tries of this. Bullshit, it's not to save money.

Don't say that. That's the main reason. This is such a lie, dude. Just so I can save money. Say the real fucking reason. I don't want to hang out with you guys, okay? That's the real reason. Say the real...

Can you say why? Yeah, yeah. My girl had to work. So she literally was like, I got time off. And I was like, amazing. And then we looked at it. She had four days. I was like, this is not going to work.

Yeah. Yeah. So I was like, all right, shit. Where'd you go? What? You could have been like Dove and just go. Yeah, alone. But then I would have to leave my girl.

I offered him a lot. She leaves you to work. That's what I'm saying. Yeah. Yeah. I should have had you when we were arguing about it. I was there. Yeah, we leave her all the time.

Yeah, it's just hard to be in Saint-Tropez with the guys. Is it? Is it hard? It's a little tough. I was third wheeling them this whole trip. We're fine. He's a great third wheel. Yeah.

He's the greatest. But yeah, it was fun. It was a great time. We went upstate. We went to Woodstock, which is the worst part of upstate, I think. It's just a whole town stuck in the past for an event that never happened there. I don't understand why these people are so obsessed with it. It did. It happened an hour and a half away.

Not an hour and a half. Bethel, New York is like an hour away. And all these people move there and they're all like some weird fucking spiritual shit. Our waiter was like, let me tell you about feng shui and told us why me and my girl were compatible. I was like, let me tell you about feng shui. And then told us why me and my girl were compatible. I was like, what is going on? It's rich hippies. The rich hippies in New York go, I don't want to be in the Hamptons because that's where

the rich people only care about money go. So if you're a rich person who you think you care about the world and earth and connectivity, you've got to find another place. That's what it's like. That's what it was. And they were just all caught up in this thing that happened 50 years ago. That's why when you want to follow the riches, just follow the most dirtbag versions.

I'm telling you, they got it. The riches that want to be good people, they create the worst places. Paper straws, you got to walk everywhere, no Ubers. You need a fucking blood-sucking rich. Follow them to the end of the earth.

Follow them to the end of the earth. Adrenochrome. Follow them to the end of the earth. Adrenochrome rich. I'm telling you. You need somebody Alex Jones doesn't like. Yes. Put them on a list. Soros or something.

Vacation there. Okay, so tell me. So you're up in the wilderness. Did you get your fix? I know you really wanted wilderness. Great, dude. You got your fix. Yeah.

Now, can you get that at Central Park? Can you just go to the park and get that? I don't know. It's the same trees, really, if you think about it. It's similar trees, but there's a lot of you people. You know what I mean? Oh, this is, you want more hippies there. Yeah, yeah.

And I don't want you to think that's a. He made it a point to look at these two. I know it sounds weird. I mean black people. It was even more. There's a lot of black people in there. And no, but like, I just don't, I don't know. I want to be like kind of away from it a little.

Just like peeing outside is nice. Yeah. And you can do that Center Park. I guess I've seen people do it Did you get a cabin? Yeah, so you didn't do the Winnebago thing? No, no, we didn't do that But we did too so we did one that was like a cabin that was nothing that we did another one That was super nice that was and ended up being so expensive and I was like, how did you find this? And she was like, oh I just was googling How much how How much? It was like $1,000 a night. It was like a G a night to go stay in the woods.

And when I tell you it was the woods, the crazy thing. Dude, we say good rich people are bad for the environment, bro. Good rich people are just bad for humanity. This is the worst of both worlds. Because the restaurant kind of sucked. The people, like the place was cool. Like the nature was cool. But then all the people. They they suck it was just oligarchs and shit just like what do you mean oligarchs just russians there's just so many eastern europeans no no no they're

not allowed here i don't know they were just all speaking russian they were just all walking around just fucking judge me with their fendi shirts or whatever i hate that i hate when you wear a shirt with just the brand on just the thing is it crazy is it that happened there and Russians aren't allowed in France? The only place Russians are allowed right now is Turkey. Wait, really? Yeah, and I'll be honest with you, my biggest nightmare, what did I say? What did I say to you? My biggest nightmare on vacation is go to a place where Russians are.

It's just they're the classless, most classless people on the planet. No, I'm not racist for being on the planet. No, no, no, they're the classless, most classless people on the planet. No, no, no. They're the most classless people. I mean, listen, I'm not talking about the Russians that we have here, even though it's probably the same, but the more of the Russians from Russia, it is pure classness. Are they similar to rich Chinese?

Like the super rich Chinese people from China? I think it's more honor with the Chinese. There's similarities in that they both come from communist countries. And when you come from a place where everybody's supposed to be equal, you need to show that you're not. And that's why Fendi is everywhere. Gucci's everywhere. And they make specific products for the Chinese market that are like that.

Because when you come from a time where everybody has to be equal and now you don't, you really want to show everybody, yo, I'm not like you. Look at the brands. Look at the brands all over the place. They were in Woodstock Yeah, they were fucking Just fucking pretending like a LARP in in the woods. So are you done with all this you want to join the yeah? What are you ready to like have fun? Like yeah, no cuz there's nature where we go to is just beautiful Yeah, I think I get I think I get not that nature though. He likes the woods nature. Yeah, the woods is kind of nice.

Can I be honest with you? Woods is the worst. Water over woods all day, bro. It's the worst nature on the planet. Woods is a cool change up, but water over woods is not even close.

Woods sucks. He grew up in Florida. He had water his whole life. Now he wants to be around some shit where he could die. No, they have woods in Florida too. They do?

They got bears and shit in Florida. They got jaguars. It's not. It's swamps, bro. They do have jaguars. shit in Florida. They got jaguars. It's swamp, it's not. It's swamp, bruh. They do have jaguars. They got jaguars, yeah. Yeah.

Panthers, yeah. Say it again? Jaguars. Jaguars. Jaguars. Whatever, jaguars. What's your favorite car? I like a jaguar.

A nice E-Series would be really pleasant to have. A nice Jaguar E-Series. But no, the woods, if I'm just being objective here, it's the worst type of nature. It's the poorest. That's the fact. No, Swamp is the poorest. It is. It's a statement of fact.

It is. Swamp is the poorest. I mean, like, somebody breaks out of jail, where do they go hide? They hide in the woods, right? Nobody goes hide in the coast. You know what I mean? Because there's people there. Because there's people on the coast. I was trying to be around no one.

But you don't want to be around no one. You want to be around fucking Russians wearing Fendi with their stupid, funny shoes. I didn't want to be around those people. I did not. Keep driving an hour north. So that's what we did. Go find a lake. That's what we did. The first time we were with the Russians, the second time we went all the way up to where we were completely alone. Was there a lake? Yeah,

there was a waterfall. We took a nap at the waterfall. There you go, it's a little loud. It's a little loud, you don't need all that. But it was great though, my girl was trying to tell me stories, I was like shh. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Listen. Drown her out, just drown her out. It was fucking a quiet place, dude, it was beautiful.

Yeah, you gotta get off of this whole, what is it called, woods? You gotta get off of this whole woods kick. The woods is the worst. You're from the city, you don't understand. It's the worst. Listen, I the city. You don't understand. It's the worst. Listen, I understand it. No, I don't understand.

Let me tell you something. I don't get it. We created a park, right, in New York called Central Park. If the woods was the best type of nature, it would just be woods. But it's the worst type,

so we made a whole park with everything but the woods. It's not about the woods. It's about being not around people. It's about being just kind of distant and just being like, hey, we don't even need to lock the doors. Mark, nobody is the woods. It's about being not around people. It's about being just kind of distant and just being like,

hey, we don't even need to lock the doors. Mark, nobody is more of a social butterfly than you. Yeah, it's so infuriating. Anytime you're around somebody, you want to talk to them about... That's why you got disengaged. That's why you got disengaged. You've won four days, five days,

no one's around. This is a lie. I don't buy this at all. That's the only way he can not talk to people if they're all around him. That's the only way he can talk to his wife. If there's not a single human being within five hours from them.

I've been Jedi mind-trick to thinking I like this. Actually, my wife loves it. Mark heard a conversation in the distance. He was like, I'm going to go check out. I was talking to birds, bro. I was chirping at a fucking cardinal. He was like, what is happening? It was fun. I did shrooms out there.

Did that make the woods fun? Yeah. It was interesting. It was very... I did shrooms out there get off the oh you did shrooms did that make the woods fun yeah that does and the woods was awesome yeah no it was just it was interesting it was like very

I like hero dose or no it was like one gram oh okay yeah but I was like very deliberate I did all the shit

that you were supposed to do that the guy told me to do he's like write it out the Graham Hancock shit like think about it that shit is fire if you're like why what happened

shit I wasn't in the woods anymore where'd you go no I'd like I was listening to music I listened to the most cliche shit Dark Side of the Moon Why? What happened? Shit, I wasn't in the woods anymore. Where'd you go? I was listening to music. I listened to the most cliche shit, Dark Side of the Moon. It's like the most cliche fucking mushroom song. It's okay. It's okay.

None of us know that, bro. We all know it. Everyone, yeah. We don't know it's cliche. You don't got to explain to us. But I get why it's cliche. In the way that Santorini or all these other spots might be cliche. It's good. It's fire.

It works. You listen to it, you're like, oh, that Santorini or all these other spots might be cliche. It's good. It's fire. It works. It's fire. You listen to it, you're like, oh, that's what everyone's talking about. God bless cliches. These people think that they're too good

for what's cliche or too good for what's popular. Go fuck yourself. Fuck your mother. If most people like it, it's probably pretty good. It's probably pretty good. Unless you're so special.

Play Dark Side of the Moon. Okay? Play it. Go. Okay, keep going. So we hit it. It was great. This is this hipster shit where you gotta act over.

You're not a hipster, but you live in Hipsterville, so you gotta act over the popular shit, but there's a reason it's fucking popular. Good for you for doing it that way. I'm so special that the thing that everyone else likes doesn't work for me. It doesn't work for me. He is a hipster.

That's what I'm saying. In his core, he actually likes good things. He's what it is. Oh, no. That's what I'm saying. These are all the people that don't. No, but in his core, he actually likes good things. That's what I'm trying to say. He's surrounded by hipsters who are like, oh, you actually watch that, dude? Anyway, go on. It's always just amazing. You get why everyone likes it. You get why everyone does it. You have the realizations.

I didn't realize that the visual effects were coupled with the feeling also. It's not just like, oh, the things are moving. The things are moving, and then also internally you're like, oh, I feel very different yeah and that shit was very cool i get like the interconnectivity thing that everyone talks about like stuff showing up for you that you're just like thinking like disassociated from is very interesting oh did you have to deal with any trauma did you have some childhood trauma come out i was diddled turns out guys i was fucking diddled the whole time did anything happen like yeah just like fear i was in there and i was like

okay the bears the bear mask no No, I mean, partially that. But I was in there and I was like, okay, what's the scariest shit I can think of? And from childhood, I was like, okay, demons. I was like, what if I'm in here and a demon gets in my head? What if the devil shows up? And then I opened my eyes and I was like, I don't want to do this anymore. I'm just going to not blink for six hours. I was like, as long as my eyes aren't shut, the devil's not going to be in my head.

And then I was like, no, fuck it. I was listening to Graham Hancock saying, he was like, when the fucking snake shows up, jump in its mouth, go for it, confront the fear. So I did it. And then I tried to conjure the scariest thing I could think of. And then nothing was there. So you leaned in, nothing to be afraid of. And then literally, the weirdest shit that happened from the thing. And again, I don't want to be over-aggrandizing this one little experience.

But no more anxiety the rest of the trip like i would like be in the woods in the middle of the night like peeing and normally i'd be like is there a fucking thing is there a bear whatever nothing went on stage two nights later like and normally i get like a little anxious like before like pack show new york comedy club kind of nervous felt nothing wow like still like it was very strange i can't tell if it's placebo or if it's actually this confrontation of this other thing. Very weird. And then even still, the effects residually have

stayed there. I don't know why. I didn't expect it to be like that. I didn't intend for that to happen, but it happened even on that small dose. Very strange. I mean, that's fire. That's amazing. Very weird. And you intentionally searched for it?

No. The goal was, but this is the other weird thing. The goal was like presence. I was like, okay, how can I just stay in this moment? Like, how do I hang out with my girl? How do we like a good husband? Like, just be really like. Then after two days, you're like, how do I get as high as possible?

Get the fuck out of this moment. Yeah, exactly. Got to get out of here. No, I was like, how do I stay as present as possible? Stay so connected to this other human being. Try to be a good husband. Like, I'm going to go see my family. How do I stay present with them and not checked out? Like, how do I stay locked present as possible, stay so connected to this other human being, try to be a good husband. Like, I'm going to go see my family. How do I stay present with them and not checked out?

Like, how do I stay locked into moments? And then the fear thing showed up and I was like, oh, is that why I'm not as present? Because I'm always back channeling like, oh, think about this other thing. This other thing is going on. I got to do other stuff. And that's all fear that's built in. It's just like being present and not being worried about 10 other things that are happening next week.

So I don't know. That's the way I interpret it. Very strange. I don't want to be's the way I interpret it. Very strange. I don't want to be the person that's like, dude, fucking shrooms fixed all my problems. You convinced me to do shrooms, though. Yeah, it's very convincing.

But it's the work, though. It's like, that just shows you some shit, but then you got to really be intentional about working on it. I think the shrooms are going to just show you something. But really,

it's just you showing you something. Ari says something like, it's basically like therapy and meditation, but it just accelerates it a bit. Yeah, and if you don't listen to anything the therapist says or you don't work on any of the shit you guys talked about in the session, it's going to be useless.

Then you're Jonah Hill. Yeah. Yeah, I guess. Shout out to Jonah. Shout out. Shout out to Jonah, bro. Jonah's the goat, man. Did you think that that was abusive?

No, I did not think it was abusive. These bitches out their goddamn fucking mind, yo. They are out their goddamn mind. Bring bitches out there goddamn fucking mind, yo. They are out there goddamn... Bring up the text. Bring up the text. So he was wiling a little bit.

There you go. Listen, he's wiling a little bit like... But he did something fire. I'm going to start using the word boundaries for anything I don't like. Oh, yeah.

I have a boundary where you disagree with anything I say. That's my boundary. So if you do that, then you're breaking one of my boundaries and I can't boundary where you disagree with anything I say. That's my boundary. So if you do that, then you're breaking one of my boundaries and I can't be with you. That being said, I don't think there was a single thing that was abusive about what he did. No, I think it was abusive.

I was crazy insecure and shitty. Yeah, he's insecure. Yeah. But he's not saying you can't be a human being. He's like, I wish you well. I just personally don't want you posting your ass on Instagram. I just personally don't want you going on these little surf dates with other men. I just personally don't want a partner that's going to do that.

And if you need to do that, you go for it. I wish you the best. You got it. But I can't have that. He met her while she was doing all these things, got with her while she was doing all these things. And now that you're together, you're like, now I'm not okay with all these things. He hollered at her off the circuit page. You gonna call that abusive, bro?

Inconvenient, sure. This is a little inconvenient. It's a bit more than inconvenient. It's not abusive, but it's more than inconvenient. So then what is it? It's just being a shitty boyfriend and maybe like, um, It's just a girl who ain't never been abused and wants some attention. Probably toxic is what it is. Toxic is a word I can,

we can settle on toxic, I think. I don't think that shit is toxic, yo. Don't have your ass on Instagram. You weren't, when you weren't with me, that shit worked to get me.

Now you got me. Now get your ass off Instagram. Simple as that. But if she's a surfer and there's pictures of her surfing, you don't need to surf in a thong. Did you see Shorty in a thong surfing? That's what all these girls surfing though. They're dumb.

Not mine. Not mine out there. First of all, even if you do surfing it, you need to have a picture of you getting back shots on fucking Instagram. You need to have a picture of you bent over showing the fucking thong on your ass. Do you not bend when you surf?

She's putting up a picture of her surfing. Who stands up straight to surf? She's putting up a picture of her servant. Who stands up straight to surf? Somebody got to fucking come into the water with a camera, a waterproof camera. Wait a minute, let me bend over on the board so you can perfectly see the swims. Who are you?

Who are you guys? What type of fucking men are you that are going to defend the girl with her fucking pussy lips out on Instagram? I wouldn't get with a girl who was a surfer if I had an issue with it. No, no, no. You get with them and you change them.

Maybe if he wiped her and he was like, yo, you don't need to work anymore. I got you. But you're just dating and you can't do what you love or what you want. No, he wipes her. That's wifey. No, he didn't wipe her. Then I'm married. It's wifey. It's wifey. That're not married. It's wifey. Put a rig on it now. It's wifey.

It's wifey. That is his girlfriend. It's wife-ish. That was the girl he was with when we were doing the movie. They together, nonstop. That's wifey. So in your brain. I can't believe y'all are capping for this dumb bitch.

This is so gay of both of you. This is three of us, bro. I'm just saying both of us. And I said it's not abuse. What's toxic about it? Don't be dating dudes in a thong. What? None of y'all would let your girls do this.

You're going to let your girl go and have surf dates with a guy in a thong? If she's a surfer and I don't surf, go. So when your girl met you, right? When all of our girls met us, except for y'all. Okay, me and you. When our girls met us, we was out in these streets. Mm-hmm. That changed once we had a relationship, right?

Yeah. So shit changes once you're in a relationship. I don't consider surfing out in these streets. That's what I'm saying. That's a different thing. I don't consider surfing out in these streets, though. That's what I'm saying. That's a different thing. Thong surfing. Thong surfing. Crazy thong surfing.

Thong surfing. Hey, I'll be honest with you. If he don't want you surfing, get your ass on land. What the fuck you surfing for? Get your ass on land. Yo, you can't have the cheeks covered, bro. Like, that's a crazy. We live in a world where you can't tell your girl

to cover her asshole when she's out there on a surfboard. That's abusive. To be like, yo, cover your asshole when she's out there on a surfboard, that's abusive. To be like, yo, cover your asshole when you're surfing with men. That's abuse. That's toxic. We didn't say, we say it's not abuse. It's toxic. You say it's toxic.

That's toxic, yeah. You gay. If you're a man and you say any other man's toxic, you gay. You gay. You gay. You the title. You gay. Wait, wait, wait. Wait, okay. You're gay You're gay You're gay You're gay Wait wait wait

Wait okay If Usher wanna sing to your girl And you If Usher wanna sing to your girl And it's just singing Yeah It's just singing Yeah

You cool with that? Just singing? Yeah First it's singing Then you add them 22 You know what I mean? I'm just saying First you sing it

Then you add them 22 Do you know what I mean? I'm just saying, first you sing it, then you Adam 22. Do you know what I mean? That's how it starts. That's how it starts. Usher, don't play. Usher, don't play. Usher will sing your girl out of her panties, bro.

I'm telling you, it's a problem, bro. You saw what happened to Keke Palmer? And she had the cheeks out like that looking crazy. Come on, y'all. What we doing out here?

What team are you on? What team are you on? What team are you on? What team are you on? What team are you on? What team are you on? What team are you on? What team are you on?

What team are you on? What team are you on? What team are you on? What team are you on? What team are you on? What team are you on? What team are you on? What team are you on?

What team are you on? What team are you on? What team are you on? What team are you on? What team are you on? What team are you on? What team are you on? What team are you on?

What team are you on? What team are you on? What team are you on? What team are you on? What team are you on? What team are you on? What team are you on? What team are you on?

What team are you on? What team are you on? What team are you on? What team are you on? What team are you on? What team are you on? What team are you on? What team are you on?

What team are you on? What team are you on? What team are you on? What team are you on? What team are you on? What team are you on? What team are you on? What team are you on?

What team are you on? What team are you on? a thong with men? Is it a female surf wave? Is it a female wave? Is it a women's only wave? Is it a women's only break from 9 to 11 is only women that are there? Is that it? Then she could wear full covered underwear.

Full covered. That's crazy. There's no way she's wearing a thong. Crazy, right? I'm not crazy, right? Why do you need to post a picture of your asshole?

You're in a relationship. Son, she's posting a picture surfing. You do that to get into the relationship. What you want her to surf in? I can't believe y'all are making these arguments. So there's nothing that you have to change. When you meet your girl, there's nothing either of you have to change. Nobody ever said that.

Nobody ever said that. Al's argument was if she did this prior to you guys being in a relationship. Yeah, it's her job, dude. It's not her behavior. It's not her job. She's not a professional surfer. She wants to be a surfer. She's a surf instructor, I believe, right?

No, she teaches fucking yoga. She's a useless. She's a useless. She's a useless. She's a useless. She's a useless. I peeped this from the second I saw it. Oh, this is great. She has a lot of pictures of surfing, bro.

She's angry. She's angry because she of surfing, bro. She's angry. This is her page? She's angry because she dated. Her page is all surfing, bro. Like, if this was her page before you got with her, come on, son. Son, son, son. That means she can't post no more. This is pretty modest to me. I don't think.

Come on, yo. No, it's pretty modest. Come on, yo. She's wearing a 50s bathing suit. Come on, yo. That was fine. I ain't saying nothing about that one. I ain't saying nothing about it. That's appropriate. That's appropriate. That's an appropriate attire. That picture was it. That was fine. I ain't saying nothing about that one. I ain't saying nothing about it.

That's appropriate. That's appropriate. That's an appropriate attire. Oh, my God. Now, go to the other one. Come on, yo. Why you need a... You told your friend,

hey, take this picture of me looking on into the distance where you see my ass cheek hanging out in my fucking bathing suit. You said take the thirst trap. Who are you thirst trapping for? Y'all crazy. Y'all are really crazy.

I can't believe I'm talking to y'all right now. I truly can't believe it. I truly can't believe it. I am honestly, thank you. I thought I was crazy. This man crazy. You gonna make arguments for these girls to be sluts? Is that what you want? I'm just

so confused. I'm so confused. I'll tell you the answer. No! I'll tell you the answer before you even ask it. No! No! You're on vacation. I'm on vacation. And you're on a boat. I'm on a boat. With your shirt off. My shirt off. Posted all these thirst traps.

Thirst traps. That's cool. That's cool. But can your shorty do it? Hell no. Now ask yourself, did you see any? Did you see any posting? None. None. That's what I'm saying. So you could be a thot, but she can't.

100%. That's his boundary. That's his boundary. No, no, no. That's life. That's life. Instagram know these rules. I can show my titties.

Women can't show their titties. Because even Zuckerberg, even Mosseri knows. Whoa. Yeah. That's why he's rolling deep cuts. Yeah, we're going after the real CEO of fucking Instagram. He knows a woman's titties is different than a man's titties, Al. What's different about them?

You can suck all up on them women's titties. You can suck all up on a man's titties, okay? Hey, I can't. My shoes suck. Stop that. Listen, y'all are really crazy for trying to cap for this fucking stupid behavior from this girl. She want to surf like a slut. No.

We're not allowing no slut surfers out here. That's not going to happen. Wild. No, I'm not wild. Y'all are wild. That's what's crazy when we disagree. You're like, okay, so a girl can just fuck anybody she wants to. She can just suck all the dick she wants to.

That's what you're saying. She changed that once she got a relationship, right? She changed that? Yes. That one you should change. Yes. Something's changed. Oh, so there's certain things you could change.

Yes. For having your asshole lips hanging out of a bathing suit while you're on the surfboard is not right. I know. I know. That's not right. That asshole lips is wild. Hold on. Y'all just want a girl's asshole lips out on the internet

so y'all can beat off to it. That's disgusting. Jesus. That's disgusting. Okay? Not I. Get your asshole lips tucked into that little fucking old bodybuilder bathing suit.

Yo, the world's strongest man bathing suit from the 20s. That's the type of bathing suit you need to wear. Have some respect, yo. And she's actually good. If she was just one of these dots that's like, oh, I'm a surfer, but she just goes out there to take cute pictures, that's something different. But she's actually nice with it.

Yeah. So, like, she does this. She never got stuck underwater in one night. Yeah. I think that's why. Is that why he's mad about it? That's the Yeah. So like she does this. She never got stuck underwater. Yeah. I think that's why. I think that's the hate. Is that why he's mad about it? That's the hate.

He's like, I've never looked this good surfing. She pretty good. Yeah. She pretty good. So now he telling us, yo. But there's still no reason why you need to be in a thong, yo. What you mean?

Y'all been euphoriad. Y'all been euphoriad, bro. I'm telling you, society needs to wait. Listen, we got to go back to the Ottoman Empire, bro. What we need to do is go back to the Ottoman Empire. You've been hanging with the Muslims too long. We need some rules, bro. You've been hanging with the Muslims too long.

We need some rules. We need a little bit more structure and organization. You're acting crazy because you would not allow none of this shit from your wife. Son, I didn't meet my wife as a surfer. What does that have to do with anything? She wants to do what she loves, surfing. He's saying no surfing pictures. Oh, I'm sorry.

Did you think marriage is about doing what you love? What the fuck is wrong with you, Akash? It's about sacrificing the things you love more than anything. Son, he's mad she's hanging out

with her female friends. Please go hang out with your female friends. No, no, no, Matt. Leave me alone. Not female friends, male friends. No, he said female friends too. Male surf dates. No, hanging out with your little slut. No, no, Matt. Leave me alone. Not female friends, male friends. No, he said female friends too, man. Male surf dates.

No, hanging out with your little slut fuckers. She was hanging out. Listen, listen. You don't want your girl hanging out with slut buckets. You don't want that. Let's say your wife had a bunch of whore slut bucket friends. Do you want her fraternizing with those fucking disgusting holes? Do you want such a thing? I don't give a fuck. Do you want such a thing? Do you want such a thing? Now you crazy. That's why I know it's time for you. Now you bugging, now you bugging.

Now I know it's time. Nah, you bugging, bro. You bugging right now. Because your friend doesn't have any slut bucket. Friends. My wife doesn't have any slut bucket friends. That's a fact. And if she did, you would have an issue with it. I'll be honest. I got an issue with most of my wife's friends. And they ain't even sluts. You know what I'm saying?

I do have an issue. I got the fucking laser out on all of y'all. Fuck up one time. It's done. That's my boundary. That's my boundary. What about the gay friends? Nah, he's cool.

I fuck with him. I fuck with the gays, bro. The gays, you good. The gays, you good. Maybe a little touch friendly, though. They got shit with that shit. Son, I listen. Nah, my wife, she got boundaries, bro.

My wife got boundaries. Did you test to see if they were undercover? Who? The gays. I did. I made them prove it. Why you yell who so loud? That was in my ear, bro.

It's because I need to check mark on that question right there. How'd you prove it? I had to fucking mark on that question Right there How'd you prove it I had to fucking vote To make sure they get it I was like alright

Let's see okay We know you bought them Now it's time to go The other way Let's see if y'all got it Let's see how versed Y'all are You gotta test

All your girl's friends bro This is so funny Cause if there's An undercover fucking Straight in the gay mix That's a problem, bro. You can't do it. That's what I'm saying.

You, your girl, she has a lot of family, right? Your wife, she got a lot of family. That don't count, bro. She can have slut bucket friends. She can have them. She can have them. But she doesn't, so you don't have anything to worry about. But these slut buckets are zigging and zagging all over the place, and you just got to chop right in the middle.

Yeah, I hate boundaries. Boundaries, bro. You wild on this one, bro. Why am I wild? You're off on this one. What's your boundary? What? What's your boundary?

Oh, my fucking way of dying. Thank you. Thank you. I was just like that. Bam, bam, bam. I just say it like, bam, bam, bam. But that's my boundary. That's my boundary too.

But that was all Kat because she does, I had to agree to at least thongs because she's from Spain and they go topless over there and she's like, what the fuck? Compromise.

Yeah, they have to compromise. You say, yo, when we in Spain, then you do that. Yeah, yeah, yeah. We in America. If we go to beaches out here, like if we go to Miami, some beaches

When you got on one, you didn't propose, you should have just wrapped a little skirt around her waist while you were down there. No, no, no, no. I will say this. She's like, I can't be comfortable on the beach because of what you're uncomfortable with. And I'm like, yeah. No, no, no. I will say this. If you and your girl are comfortable

with her wearing thongs, that is a cultural thing. And I actually don't think it's that bad. To, no, no. I will say this. If you and your girl are comfortable with her wearing thongs, that is a cultural thing. And I actually don't think it's that bad. To be honest, I don't think it's that bad. You guys are comfortable with it. But if that was something you were really uncomfortable with, you were just like, hey, it just makes me feel insecure. I see all these guys looking at you, and it makes me want to protect you. And then I feel like I have to do something physical with these guys. It doesn't allow me to relax on the beach.

Like, it just makes my whole beach experience really awful. I bet you she would go, I don't want your beach experience to be awful just for, like, three more inches of fabric. Of course, I'll do it. Yeah, that's a therapist's way to say it. You don't think he started with that? No. Of course he started. You think that's the first text?

She's a loony bucket. She's in la- La Land, guys. She doesn't know, oh, do you have any wax for my surfboard? I need to go wax my surfboard. Hey, hey, do you have any dog sex wax for my surfboard? I need to go wax my surfboard. This girl don't know what the fuck's going on. Surfing with dudes is crazy, bro.

There's only dudes out there. Why you pick a man sport? Stop picking man hobbies, bro. Pick a girl hobby. Shopping. He was doing gymnastics. What about volleyball? Backflip? That's gymnastics. That's a girl sport. You out here showing off for the girlies, bro.

What were you doing that? What if you go with a gymnast? Honestly, I gotta have a talk with my wife about that. I got to apologize. I got to chill out. Because I think I was attracting too many bitches with that backflip that I did. I was thinking. I was attracting way too many bitches.

That was some body shit. That was a thirst. I did a backflip. Sometimes I'm a thot. You know, every time you post some rich-ass pictures. Yeah, you see him competing. Yeah, I did one. I did one.

I saw you actually. I was like, nah, I'm going to get this shit. I did one. I ain't going to lie. after I did that backflip, everybody posted their backflips. Nah, see, I respect my girl. I ain't posting. Everybody posted.

I respect my girl. I ain't posting, you see? Now, you know your backflip wasn't that clean, though. No, it was nice. It wasn't thorough. It was nice. It wasn't thorough. It was just too good.

I looked too good. Can I be honest with you? I know you don't got a good backflip. He's too top heavy, bro. I know you don't got a good backflip. It was nice. I know you don't got a good backflip. Watch out heavy, bro. I know you don't got good back flip. Let me see that back flip, bro.

Why didn't you send it to the group? Because it didn't have it. It would turn them on too much, too. If he hit it, he would have sent it. He would have sent it before the engagement. This is too much attention if I post it. Which one is it? Oh, you're on the line.

You a fucking cocksucker. Clean. You're spinning kind of slow. Clean, clean. I feel like you landed on your knees and face. I feel like you shut the fuck up. First of all. It's clean.

Let me see. Let me see what's going on here. No, you don't even go fully around. It's clean. The other dude nailed it, though. The other dude killed that shit. The other dude was slightly better. That was the guy that caught my attention first. You know what I mean? I've seen that guy before.

I've never seen him. Adam 22 or Lena 25? That's what I said. Lena 25 or Adam 22? Y'all were hating in that fucking group chat, bro. What'd you be? I sent a text to the group chat like, yo, my man's meat ain't that crazy, right? And y'all were like, you actually Googled it?

I'm like, yeah, didn't we all Google it? You wild for that one. No, the wildest part that you thought a 25-inch meat exists. That's the wildest. Yes, you did. That is wild. I did.

You were like, yo, is it really 25? He's on the metric system. He's on the metric system doing centimeters. You wild. I thought it was that. I did think it was that.

That's more. I did think it was that. I did think it was that. Because Grandy was talking about how it was 25 inches. You cannot believe everything you post on Instagram. I didn't believe everything.

I believe that. Okay, I thought it was 25. There You cannot believe everything you post on Instagram. I didn't believe everything. I believed that. Okay, I thought it was 25. There's the old people on Facebook and shit. Yo, son, son, I am one of the old people. You know how many times a week I send my business manager a text message I get where it's just like, just fill out this passcode for Facebook and fill out this passcode for Facebook

because your account is about to be overrided or hacked. Like, once a week I send it, and they're like, this is spam, don't do it. So, yes, I am that old person. Two, he said 25 inches. I thought it was maybe around, I thought it was a rough estimate. Oh, maybe it was 22. My man, I had him 22.

And then I saw it, and I was so let down. I was like, it's the worst way to see it. Yeah, you want it to be three inches. You want it to be a huge dick. Yeah. Yeah, I was like, yo, she got that. She got it. I'm not saying the guy's dick ain't huge.

It's huge. But when you think 25, and then it's, what do you think it was? Nobody thought 25, though. That's what we're tripping on. No one thought 25. Well, you can't say no one because you're sitting in front of someone who did. Okay?

You're sitting in front of a human being who thought it was 25 inches. Okay? We pulling it up? Yeah, dude. We can pull it. It's wild, bro. Come on, bro.

Come on. What are we doing? Is it? That's soft. Greg Oden. That's soft, dog. Is it? What?

Why is he cooking, bro? Now, let me ask y'all a question. Is it? Now, go to it hard. Like, it's crazy to say that, but go to it hard. Go to it hard, because baby and shit goes to 25. Yeah. So, it was only me and Dub that saw it, but we saw it separate.

So when he hit the group chat with it, he's like, dude, you've never seen his work? No, Dub been saw it because he knew the name and everything. I've never heard of this dude. On Black Draw? No, Dub texted, it's cinema. He did a cinema.

Beautifully shot. Yeah, absolutely. What's that? Is that one of the black draws? Or is that like a Photoshop? Is that girl really in black draw? Yeah. Why are you looking at the girl, homo? I know, my bad. I did fuck up right there.

Is he raking leaves for the hard dick? That's crazy. Yeah, he does a lot of activities, Nick. Yeah. Does a lot of housekeeping, evidently. Whoa, whoa, whoa. Go to the side, to the side. Go side, Mark, down. This is, come on. Go down and look right there. What's that one? Cinderella. What? I mean.

Ooh-wee. Yeah. Does his dick point up? No. Oh, wow. He got an Alex. He got an Alex. Alex claims his penis. And Miles, and Miles, come on. Nah, Miles, nah. Y'all dicks are Australian. So that's it hard.

It's fine. Right? Right, dude? No, no, no, it's very big, but I'm thinking 25. I think he could just be like that. He could think be like that. He could think with his dick. Rodan. For real.

Yeah, I want him to ponder shit. I'm good on this one. What do you mean? Oh, my God. I'm like surrounded by- I'm trying to find- He's right now. Listen, okay, so should we discuss this whole Adam 22 thing? I think we did, right?

I think we handled it. Well, we didn't discuss it. Yeah. What do did, right? I think we handled it. Well, we didn't discuss it. Yeah. What do you guys think? I can't find it. I mean, I don't know. That's a boundary for me. Yeah, I'm not blown away

by it for him, though. Like, he does porn with his girl. You know what I mean? Like, he's a podcaster. He's a BMX dude. He's got all these brands, but he also is a porn star. And so porn stars often will act

in scenes the way they see it with other people. So I don't see it as, for him, that crazy. That's the mother of his... Yeah, I mean, it's crazy. What happened to us on vacation? Y'all got soft. Don't come back

over here now. One of us kept it true, the one that went to the Muslim part of the world. Every porn star does it. Is it weird for porn stars to do this? To do what? To let your girl... Yeah, bro, yeah. Stop, stop.

Yeah, thank you. Y'all all been Destiny. Y'all been Destiny done fucking radicalized out of 22. Radicalized, Mark. Doesn't Destiny let his girl do that shit? I don't know, bro. That's crazy. He's open...

They're swingers, they're swingers. Swingers. Cut that, bro. That's crazy. He's open. Swingers, they're swingers. Swingers. Cut that term out. That's crazy shit, too. Stop calling it a little funny thing that kids play in. It's not swingers. It's you let people fuck your girl. Low-key, filming is better than not filming it, though.

Because not filming it, you're just doing it for the love of the game. You film it, you get money off of it. Oh, hey. Hey, you changed my mind with that one. I think this is a funny point. If you film it, I think it's better, dude. Then you get money off of that. Oh, hey! You changed my mind with that one. I think it's just a funny point. If you film it, I think it's better, dude. Then you get paid. I don't know.

Nah, because more people don't know about it. But you know that it was just for the love. Of the game. And that's harder. The bank account. I'll be honest. And I haven't texted out about this. He capped on here.

Say what? I know. He sat on here. He's like, I got too much money for my wife to get donkey fucked by some dude. And does that mean? Look, this is what I thought

it was, and I haven't spoken to Adam about it. I don't even want to text him about it. It's just too fucking weird. But what I thought this was is you kill a story with a story. I texted you guys this sort of group, I think, as well, which is like the story about No Jumper was it's falling apart. You had all these people that were like the, you know, they're not staff. They're like talent.

They're like on-air talent. All leave, leaves a huge vacuum. What's happening with the identity? Like what's happening with the brand? Is the brand done? Is it over? And then announces this thing. And then all the conversation is about this, and none of it is about, oh my God, all the people that were on the channel have left it and have gone, done their

things, and no jumper is done. Now, people are being critical of this, for sure, but it feels as if the entire internet is talking about this one thing. And if Adam is cool with it, he doesn't care about the criticism because he's getting all the views, all the attention, and he's pivoting more into something that maybe is working for him, which is, hey, I like the porn shit, I don't give a fuck. We're making way more money on the porn shit than we did the gang shit. So now I'm completely done with the gang shit, and I do the porn shit, and I do the podcast. And it's gonna make crazy money. I wonder if it's just we're doing one and then we're quitting

the internet. I literally wonder if it's... It seems like he's teeing up the next shit. I don't think he's doing one and then quitting. Who knows? But if you are comfortable, here's the thing. After one, there's minimal returns

in my personal opinion. Diminishing returns. It's like how many times do you need, like once we know you're okay with someone banging your wife, I don't need to see a third person bang your wife. The big one is the first one. You've either got to go bigger in size,

which is like. Maybe 24. 24. If you go up to 24, that'd be crazy. Or it's got to be some kind of like wild collapse. He said something about him and another dude doing it. That is another angle you could go. But I think this is a perfect example of killing a story

with a story. When you said that, I was just like, looking away. Now you're all traditional. Now you're all conservative. Listen, what's the big deal? She was into adult filmmaking before they met.

You have to allow her to do this. There is a difference between surfing with a man and letting that man fuck your wife. Is there? You don't know how much he loves surfing, dude. He loves surfing so much. That's the disconnect. That's it, bro.

You've never ridden a wave before. You don't know what it's like. You've never rode pipe oxen. So I'm just trying to say, rode pipe, I'll cut it. Yeah. So I'm just trying to say, I'm just trying to say, for me, they're the same.

They are the same. They are the same. Why are you surfing with this guy? When you could just be getting fucked by him. Yeah. You might as well. You might as well.

You might as well. Why are you putting on as little clothing as possible to get wet with a man? Like, why don't you just say that? Why don't you just say that to me? Hey, hey, husband, I'm going to go put on as little clothes as possible and go get wet with another man. Whoa, whoa, that sounds crazy. Be out of breath.

You know what I mean? Straddle. Aboard. This shit is too horny. Almost die in three feet. That's facts. Come on, bro horny. Almost die in three feet. That's facts. Come on, bro. Let her almost die with two feet.

You think surfing's too horny? That was great. That was great. Say what? Surfing's too horny? Surfing's too horny, bro. Didn't you learn on Fire Island? Son, I learned on a gay island.

I had to control myself. I had to control myself, bro. Oh, my God. For real. Try had to control myself, bro. For real. Try and make me gay, Mark. I'm just pointing it out. That's where you learn. You don't got to try very hard.

I was born in the dark. Yeah, I was born in the dark. I'm Bane. I'm the Bane of this shit. Of gay? Yeah. I'm Bane. I'm Bane, Mark.

Okay? Fuck out of here. Hey? Come on. I'm Bane I'm Bane Mark K fuck out of here alright come on bring up a topic or something um business wise

is great for Adam though oh is that I mean no no no the way they've been marketed fucking Alex fucking Alex

Alex with a real fucking hot take over here. Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh. Was it? Was it good business? It wasn't that funny, doggy. Now you're juicing it.

Now you're juicing it. Was it good business-wise? Wow-ee. Where'd you get that one from Al I bet the way they've been marketing it Because they've been Don't be mad at him putting gas on his You be doing it every time I talk in his accent

You do that That's a fact Oh my god Because it was mad quiet and we were searching for something to say And you were just trying to help But it was just such a useless sentence. We were trying to do something and then it just went like that. No, but do you think it was good business?

Yeah, it was really good business. But now they've been building it up and it still hasn't dropped yet. And it's like you have to subscribe to OnlyFans. And so many people are going to subscribe and forget that day. But so many people are going to subscribe and forget that thing. But so many people are going to subscribe and forget that they're subscribed to it. And then you'll just have like that large income revenue or whatever. I'm trying.

I'm going to just keep mouthing. How do you do that? Word salad. Yeah, word salad. You call that mouth cabbage? No, mouth garbage. But yeah, that's the thing It's like, we signed up If we're signing up, we're signing up

For big black dicks In your wife So if next month If next month I don't have another big black dick In your wife, I'm tight I'm commenting, bro Whoa, whoa, whoa, why am I wild? If I signed up for NBA league pass

And you don't give me no games, what's the problem? What if it's just Linus surfing with another dude? Then it's the same thing. Same thing. Okay, bet. If a black guy is surfing and surviving,

I'd be very surprised. You're going to be like me in a while. Dick's the leash? I think this is going to be a little potential problem. Keeping up with... I agree. Keeping up with the standard. With the Johnsons.

I agree. Keeping up with the Johnsons, bro, for real. Or it could be a one-hitter quitter. We out. They might just be catching a lick. Or does it happen at all? The worst part, she said, I was sore for a few days after. This is theater.

This is them. He is being very funny with it. I don't even think so. Yeah. I ain't gonna lie. He is. He is being funny. He is.

He got jokes. He's commenting on every post. They're reposting it a bunch. It shows the power of humor, too, because the funnier he is about it, the more okay I feel about him in the situation. Or at least the less un-okay I feel about it. I feel less like, blech. I'm not okay with it, but I'm less like- No, no, no, okay for him. I feel like he doesn't care.

I really think he doesn't care. Yeah, I don't think he does. Yeah. Yeah, and- But I also don't think he has feelings. Exactly. We told him this when he came on the pod the first time. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah.

This confirms it. You have to not have feelings to allow this to happen. But what a competitive advantage. You have no feelings. Yeah, yeah. All right, guys You have to not have feelings to allow this. But what a competitive advantage, you have no feelings. All right guys, let's take a break for a second. Let's be honest here. The biggest clouds, the coldest smoke, the smoothest experience. If you enjoy toking, if you will, but you hate that throat and lung burning, okay, you gotta check out today's sponsor, it's a FreezePipe.

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has the source code open. For Twitter? I think Elon made it open source and just kind of put the source code out there and I think that is going to cause a lot of problems if it becomes, if it goes to litigation. Because they can say, oh, did you hire ex-Twitter employees?

Yes. But I don't think they breached contracts because I think they were terminated for a long enough time. They would have to prove that they violated some type of non-compete,

which I don't think they can do. And then on top of that, it's all open source code. So they can just look at it and be like, yeah, you got access to it. Yeah. I don't know.

And if he hired all of them as consultants, I think that gets around the contracts because they're not employees. Yeah. And you he hired all of them as consultants, I think that gets around the contracts because they're not employees. Yeah. And you fired them. So if you fire, you're not going to go to a competitor.

Unless you gave me a crazy severance, I don't think I can just do whatever I want. Fired unceremoniously, it seemed like. They just woke up to an email. They were fired. And I can't go work for a competitor? That seems crazy. Has anybody used it? No.

I posted one thing on it. Yeah, the major part of the lawsuit is that Meta recruited several former Twitter employees who possess and even currently have access to Twitter's trade secrets and other confidential information. Yeah, these tech lawsuits I just don't think go through. There's so many Twitter knockoffs. There's Mastodon, there's Blue Sky. What's the Trump one? Yeah, Truth Social. There's so many that have basically copied it.

I mean, Blue Sky is literally created by Jack Dorsey. That is a stripped down version of Twitter. What's the Trump one? Yeah, true social. There's so many that have basically copied it. I mean, Blue Sky is literally created by Jack Dorsey. That is a stripped down version of Twitter. So what is the end game here? Is Elon just trying to, what is it called, stir up waters to catch fish? Is he just using this as an opportunity to promote Twitter? Engaging in the beef, and then, that will take people back over to Twitter where he's tweeting about it. You know, like all of his criticism

of Zuckerberg come from Twitter. So he's maybe driving traffic over to Twitter. But I don't know. I just, I don't think Threads is... I think he's fucking up hard. He's fucking up. Yeah. You think?

Yeah. Yes. I couldn't believe he actually bought Twitter. I'll say that forever. I thought that was just publicity. We're getting whatever. No, that I don't understand. I'm going to pull out of the deal at the last second.

When it happened, I was like, what is your endgame here? And Twitter just seems worse. One cool thing is you can upload a whole video for however long. It don't matter. But then, like, remember that day where you could only read X amount of tweets and they just stopped letting you read tweets? No, I'm not a loser. I'm not. Did they really tell you you reach your limit?

Yeah. Unless you pay for verification. They're just trying to get everybody to pay the $8. I ain't going to do it. Yeah. So is that still the way? I think they raised the threshold. But still at a certain point you're going to need to get, which I haven't hit now.

Why are they going to this pay model? They're going away from ad revenue and just trying to make it subscription. Make all the money on a subscription side. That's the issue because no one wants to pay for something that they were using for free. I don't know why he thinks that he's going to... $44 billion?

You don't think about this before you spend $44 billion on something? So many celebrities are fine with not having their blue check. They don't give a fuck. Do you have your blue check? I don't. Who gives a fuck? And so it's like he fucked up. I don't know. It might be too soon to say. It is interesting to me that so many other

channels have taken some of the things that Twitter's done. Like paying for verification through Instagram. I think Facebook has it as well now. Yeah, the NFL stole shit from the XFL. That don't make the XFL a good league. That don't make the XFL a good idea. Yeah, but I don't know if it as well now. Yeah, the NFL stole shit from the XFL. That don't make the XFL a good league. Right. That don't make the XFL a good idea.

Yeah. But I don't know if it's too soon. I feel like it's too soon to say it's failing. What is his end goal? That's what I'm trying to say. He's really active right now. I don't think that he's really active because he believes he's going to win this lawsuit against Threads.

I don't think Threads is unique enough that people will totally transition and go over there. I think it's like fun for people right now. Cause I feel like they get a bunch of new followers and there'll be like one of the few people that are on this space, but I don't know if it has anything compelling enough to like go there and digest content. You know, like TikTok is undeniably entertaining. Like you went to it and you're like, wow, this is better than all the other apps. Like just scrolling. Now Instagram is kind of caught up with reels and YouTube is shorts. But when it was just TikTok that had that feature where it's like, you don't even need to

follow anybody. We know what you like. My wife is still so addicted to TikTok. It's unbelievable. It's like, if you have like 30 minutes, you and your wife, and you just decide to scroll TikTok, you laugh together. You might cry to video. It's like, I can't believe I'm making this argument for TikTok. It could be fucking reels. It could be shorts, whatever. But this type of entertainment, you get like a lot of feelings out of a 30-minute thing.

That's why I had to say reels and I had to say YouTube sucks because I felt myself. He was so close to trying to got this guy, bro. I fucking found myself. All I'm trying to say is, I don't see myself going on threads for breaking news. I don't see, I think it's exciting

and it was really easy conversion because you do it all through Instagram pretty much. Yeah. Like, do you want to follow everybody you already follow? Yeah. Not only that,

the people that have huge audiences on Instagram automatically get this huge audience on thread. So if it does blow up and take over Twitter, then boom, I've got a whole. Oh, is that because I'm trying to figure out how Zuckerberg thinks he can get people to threads over Twitter. Oh, that's up to you. I mean, it's super easy. You get to bring your really convenient. My issue with those like the people that are like Twitter's smart people. Instagram is like pretty people. You know what I mean? Like the biggest pages on Instagram are like aggregate pages where it's like people just post a ton of different content, like Instagram models.

And I don't know if people want to hear what they have to tweet. No. You know what I mean? So you're trying to bank on pulling Twitter levers over to threads to then get like smart people on threads and then pretty people on Instagram. And then you take over the whole thing. The only chance I have is that Twitter goes under. And then there's an alternative that exists where all your followers

already are. That works. And it's like having all Apple products where it's just like it's synced up. Are you going to get journalists over to threads? That's like the big... I think it's easy copy and paste. I think you'll get all the same articles there, and it will be a literal mirror to Twitter. The question is, are they going

to reconfigure the algorithm so you enjoy what you're scrolling on more? And I think whoever, that's the way I think they could see it winning, is go, we're not going to give you what you follow. We're going to give you what you enjoy. That's what it's currently doing. So they are TikTok-ifying it. Twitter's doing that too.

So whichever algo is better, more enjoyable, will win. But Instagram has an opportunity to completely TikTokify threads. And I wonder if that's, I don't think it's more difficult. Who knows? I think if they find a way to just integrate it with Instagram where you don't have to use a separate app. Like just have like a swipe where it's like, ah, I want to use threads while on Instagram. It's like a different window.

Because like so many people would tweet something and then copy their tweet and then post it on Instagram. Now if you could just do that. And also take your thread and post it to your IG story. Yeah. If you have complete synergy, then they might be able to get it popping. Going off this app and then opening another app is a huge barrier to Instagram. I think, yeah. They have the IG story thing.

So now if you see a thread in there and you click on that thread, it takes you right to the smart. Okay, so that kind of synergy and that seamlessness, like you were saying, that's what Apple does so well. It's like everything is just your fucking watch is connected to your TV, it's connected to your computer, your phone. It does feel rushed, though. The threads thing?

Yeah. In what way? It feels kind of like a beta version. And it's like, I'm like, The threads thing? Yeah. In what way? Like, it feels kind of like a beta version. And it's like, I'm like, why wouldn't you wait until the product is, like, great before you put it out? You think he's trying to capitalize on the beef, the we're going to fight thing? I think it's a little bit of that, but I also think there's a lot of other Twitter competitors popping up. Like, there's one, it's called Spill, that, like, I recently got on. And it's more targeted for you

know black urban community but that's the fun one it popped so quick and i think they saw it's like oh shit we need to get out you gotta get on this before interesting i might have something to do with it yeah yeah maybe they sent sense chum in the waters with twitter like it's getting weak i thought elon knew zuckerberg was going to launch threads and that's why he started this whole we need to fight beef shit. Oh. Because I assumed he knew this was coming. That's a good take. Yeah, I assumed he got ahead of it once he heard about threads.

He hadn't heard before we heard. Yeah, exactly. Oh, that's a great take. I want to see that fight, though. Yeah. I would love to see that fight. Elon is brutalizing him, son. Yeah.

Elon's like 6'4", something. He's like a big fucking walrus-looking guy. And Mark is, what, 5'8"? Yeah. Maybe. Like, his jiu-jitsu's not good enough

where you can mitigate that type of weight difference. But I don't think Elon's, like, working out, working out. I think he's gonna lay on him. I think he's just doing

those zempik. I think Zuckerberg is fucking working out. What was that workout shit that y'all did? The 100... Oh, the Murph? Yeah.

Zuckerberg does that. He's getting after it. Yeah. I'll take a small guy who's 12 years older, though. Who? Elon's 52. Zuckerberg is 39. Yeah.

Yeah, so maybe he just gets exhausted. Yeah. I mean, it's really interesting what Zuckerberg did. He started doing jujitsu and integrated himself into MMA and then used that as clout for people to think that he was cooler than the painted white face guy that is a robot when he talks to Congress. And it fucking worked. It fucking worked. Now he's talking shit on threads, talking shit on Instagram, saying, yo, let's fight, let's do jujitsu, whatever.

Like he jumps on the wave of MMA and the wave of MMA has so much, I guess, masculine clout that it de-nerdified him. Yeah. He is cooler. He is objectively cooler. He's looking cooler.

He just physically is doing cooler things. Unbelievable. It happened right after his Metaverse announcements too. Where he's like, I'm Mark and this is my digital Metaverse. Yeah, he bombed on that Metaverse shit. But he's looking cooler too because he's fit now. He's out here. Oh, yeah.

How much of all this is also just like, yo, Meta is in the fucking tank right now. Let's lift evaluation by making me look better. I can't make Meta any better right now, but I can make me look better. 100%. The one good thing I feel like from the name change is that now that they have threads, the fact that it's not associated directly with Facebook, I actually think gives threads a better chance. Like Facebook, I feel like it's such an antiquated name. The idea of like a young person using a Facebook product feels weird to them. So even just having it

be meta, like threads by meta or whatever, makes it a little better. And this is the first product I feel like they launched since changing the name. So in that regard, I'm like that is one benefit of just changing the name. Even if the product like the Metaverse didn't work, just having the name Meta

I think is better than Facebook. Interesting. And you can post videos and stuff on Threads, right? Yeah, I think so. So essentially it's going to be a better version of Facebook. Yeah.

It's like Facebook for young people. Exactly. So you replace Facebook or not even replace it. You let the old people stay over It's like Facebook for young people. So you replace Facebook, or not even replace, you let the old people stay over there on Facebook, and the young people start to adopt threads if they want to. And it's really, do black people do it? That's what it's going to come down to. If black people go on threads,

and it pops the fuck off, and it's fun, like black Twitter is fun, then I think people will go. If they don't, there's no fucking chance. I think they're angling for younger people. I think that's the goal. But they've got to get black Twitter is fun, then I think people will go. If they don't, there's no fucking chance. I think they're angling for younger people. I think that's the goal. But they got to get black Twitter going. I haven't forgotten the name Spill,

and I'm like, I need to go see what's up over there. Spill's kind of cool. There's just not enough people yet. And so that's why I think threads will probably win because it's just so easy to sign up. You need the numbers, bro. And they really made it easy to sign up. It's like Apple Pay.

You know how the most annoying thing is typing in your fucking information easy to sign up. You need the numbers, bro. And they really made it easy to sign up. It's like Apple Pay. Yeah. You know how like the most annoying thing is typing in your fucking information when you're about to buy something online. Bro. Your name, your fucking email, all these credit card, all these things. And then Apple Pay came in and it was just like tap once, done.

I'll buy anything now. Yeah. There's no time for me to think about my purchase. Yeah. Son, they're so good at that. You know when you get a code sent to you, texted you, and then it just auto-populates? Oh, yeah. I mean, Apple's so good at all of that.

Get rid of every buried entry possible. Yeah. Yeah, it's insane. Help me spend. Yeah. Do you want to see the two of them fight? No, I don't care. Really?

I would. I mean, I would watch it. I would watch it, yeah. Yeah, I would watch the shit out of it, but I don't think it's good for, like, America. Why? Like, two billionaires, like, two of the biggest technocrats that are ruling the country. It's very idiocracy.

If you've seen that movie, this is exactly what they would do. I just don't think it's a good global look. I don't know. To me, it feels like end of the empire. It feels like a falling empire.

I can see that. I didn't think that, but I can see it. I don't know if it is, but it does have that feeling to me. I don't know. I think they just start the new Logan Paul,

Jake Paul fight league amongst billionaires. Now it's like other billionaires are going to want to get in and be like, nah, I'm the toughest billionaire. Yeah, I think that's bad. That shit will be fire.

I think the best way to prove toughness of billionaires is like to keep America on course. Like the corporations run the country and that's good and bad. But as soon as they're less thinking about

running the country and more thinking about like fucking up other billionaires within the same country, then I'm like, oh, that's bad for the country. Yeah, that's a good point. mean it is entertaining as shit like i'm gonna watch it i'm here for entertainment baby for a good time not a long time

what did these romans do that's that's what i'm saying it feels circusy so i'm like but if the romans had the empires in the gladiator ring or the emperors in the gladiator you'd be like and we don't have the only billionaires. There's going to be other people getting into that. Who? One less Indian billionaire, but there might be other ones.

He's Pakistani. Oh, Pakistani. My bad. That was my bad. My bad, my bad. But yeah, once they get in that, now it's going to be

on some country shit. Now we're rooting for Zuck if he's going against the fucking Chinese billionaire. Yeah. That's fire. That's kind of cool. I don't think the Chinese billionaires are going to be allowed to go in this league.

Yeah. I don't think China specifically. I think China's going to be like, you could do that. Another one of y'all could disappear. We have no problem. The question is, do we want Elon Musk spending 14 hours a week training or 14 hours a week solving the problems that will hopefully continue the great legacy of the United States of America?

I'd rather him train than spend 14 hours a week on Twitter. But that's not what I said. I understand, but I mean, he's already wasting his time doing shit that's not helping out the world. So it's like, whatever. If it takes him off Twitter,

because he's kind of annoying on Twitter. So, hey, I'd rather you fight than be on Twitter. I have not 180'd on a person this hard in quite a while. I mean, I was all Elon everything. Yeah. And now I'm like,

bro, what the fuck are you doing? That's what I'm saying. Like, shut up for a little bit. Maybe I can go back to liking you again if you just shut the fuck up. He just tweeted every once in a while some, like, smug shit. It was funny.

It was hilarious. Just too much. Too much Elon. But now if he could fight, if he's fucking people up and then still sending rockets to the fucking moon, let's do it.

Remember when Jimmy Kimmel and Ted Cruz played basketball and it was like fucking three to four and they just had to cancel the match? No, I'm not gay. I've never seen that. I've never seen that.

I didn't even know they did that. Wait, what do you mean it was three to four? It was like a horrible game. Yeah, I thought Ted Cruz won. I think they called the game because it took too long. I could be wrong, but either way, it was just pathetic. It's like, y game. I think they called the game because it took too long. I could be wrong, but either way, it was just pathetic.

It's like, y'all aren't athletes. Why are we watching this? This would be the same thing. It would not be a good fight. Maybe not for Zuckerberg as much because he's clearly in shape. For someone who gets head trauma, someone who thinks of... That would be hilarious. They're fighting each other.

That is a very real possibility. Show us how much you care about UFC fighters. Let those guys fuck their heads up. The smart ones. If you build a multi-billion dollar company, I'm going to be more concerned about your brain. The country isn't in their hands. UFC fighters, if they ran the country,

then I'd be like, yo, you guys got to chill. Keep doing country stuff. But the corporations run America, so I'm like, keep doing this. Yeah, I don't want your focus on this fight, to be honest. I mean, I don't really think they're going to fight. Like, I think it's just publicity, and I think it's good for both of them. Yeah. But I don't really think that they're going to fight.

There's no way. It does keep Twitter in threads that much more than it does. I think Elon needs it. Maybe. He needs a W right now. Maybe. I mean, just focus on the cars, man. That's the other thing.

How do all great empires die? Spreading themselves too thin. And maybe that's what Elon's doing. He's built this great empire. And he's got SpaceX secondarily. You've got Tesla. You've got SpaceX. Boring company.

There's a bunch of different ones. But it's like, yeah, maybe he's spreading himself too thin. Why don't you focus on... Now, granted, it's your life. Do whatever you want with your life. He did step down from Twitter. Right. Yeah. So, hopefully, he's getting back on track. Yeah. Anywho,

what else we got going on? Yeah, we can talk about your girl. Yo, do you know what's going on with that? There's a lot. I try to figure it all out. Okay. It's a lot.

I write a couple of things. Amanda, what is her name? Miranda Sings. Miranda Sings, yeah. So, what the fuck is happening with this girl? Like, I think we need to educate people on who she is. It might be a lot. Yeah, I mean, she's featured in Seinfeld's Comedians in Cars.

Yes. She did an episode. He went on her show. She's basically- Seinfeld's most watched episode, apparently. Is that true? Really? Wow. That's what I heard.

That is crazy. So Colleen Ballinger is a internet influencer, YouTuber, internet celebrity, and basically got famous making song parodies where she would wear this crazy makeup, play this character Miranda Sings, and would sing terrible covers of songs. And that was her character and she was this wacky person. And kids loved it. Kids loved it. Her demo was probably like 8 to

15, something like that. And then she kind of pivoted to just being a YouTuber, had a kid, blah blah blah. And this happened in 2020. This kid that was basically running her fan account was posting a bunch of stuff. Now, they came out in 2020. This kid that was basically running her fan account was posting a bunch of stuff. Now, they came out in 2020. All of this happened in 2013 or 2014 when the kid was 13, 14 years old. And basically, she just starts confiding in him really personal things about her

divorce. She starts telling him all of these really personal secrets because they built a relationship through him running her fan account. They ended up like meeting up a few times and going to dinner, yada, yada. And then the whole big thing is that like she sent him lingerie. That was like the big controversy that everyone's looking at. I looked into it. It's not as crazy as it sounds, even though it's still inappropriate. Basically, they did like a lingerie reveal on one of her like live streams where her husband wore the lingerie over his clothes. And then he was commenting like, oh, this is so funny, blah, blah, blah. Like I, let me have it or something like that. And then she basically sent him the lingerie.

How old is he? I think at this time he was like 15 or 16, something like that. And then, so she sent it to him and his parents were like, what the hell? Like he lives in Dublin. They were just like, what the fuck? This is insane, super inappropriate. They told him to cut off contact, took all the stuff from him. I think other things transpired in their interpersonal relationship. I think she was asking about pointed personal questions about virginity and stuff like that. I don't know the exact details. That's wild though.

But it's basically having very personal conversations with her underage fans and then also sending them sexual clothing. Even though it wasn't in the most sexual way, it's still crossing a line. So he basically pointed this out in 2020, and then it resurfaced now. I don't really know exactly why, but it seems like it comes up every year or so. And then this one really popped off because she wrote an apology, non-apology video, where she sang her non-apology. And that got people fired up too.

I saw that. That was good. Yeah. It was good? You liked the... I mean, she has some bars in her. But like... No, no, no.

I'm curious. You thought it was a smart PR move or the song was good? I didn't watch it. Oh, no. I just liked the fact that she was kind of like singing some bars and kind of like singing some bars and then talking singing some bars i've never seen her before i didn't maybe she does this all

the time and i was like oh it's pretty impressive but outside of that i think she's a little weird for engaging with young kids yeah so much because i did a little research there was like a group chat where she had like a bunch of younger people in it. I thought I read this. Then she fired that kid who was one, why do you have such a young kid running your social media? He started it on his own. I think I read she was

talking to him about her relationships and her issues. And then she fired him for posting something inappropriate even though she had okayed the post. Which I'm like, that's fucked up. But yeah, she just sounds a little off. Sounds like she's on spectrum a little bit. She doesn't realize that she does things

that are a bit inappropriate until it comes back up and to bite her in the ass. Yeah. Do you know more? No, that's the extent of my knowledge. Did I miss anything on that, Miles? Do you know anything else? No, I mean, she had some later on things with Trisha Paytas, and they had a show.

How long ago did you stop running her fan account? Weeks. Literally weeks ago. No, did you watch this lady? No, no, no, I never did. I just caught up on it with Phil DeFranco. He explained everything pretty well. Yeah. But the song's wild. She opens caught up on it with Phil DeFranco. He explained everything pretty well. Yeah.

But the song's wild. She opens going, they told me not to talk about this, but they didn't tell me not to sing about it. That's sort of funny. That sounds like some Schultz shit, right? It's like, everybody tells you, hey, don't talk about this. Oh, so guys. But yeah, so it just seems inappropriate. I don't know if it's like, I don't know if she's like grooming.

Like those are like the accusations on her. I don't know how you can really prove that. I don't know if she had intent to like do sexual behaviors with these kids. Maybe she did. I have no idea. Ain't nobody want to fuck your kid, yo. Ain't nobody want to fuck your kid. I mean.

Tell these parents nobody want to fuck your kid. Have you seen To Catch a Predator? No. They made 10 seasons about so many people. Anybody want to fuck you again? I want to fuck you again. How many women were on that show? Hey, hey, how many women were on that show?

There was a handful. There was a handful. No. Yeah, there was a couple. Ain't no bitches on To Catch a Predator. A couple surfers, yeah. Get out of here, bro. Were there bitches on To Catch a Predator?

Yeah, I think famously there was a couple. Were there bitches on To Catch a Predator? Yeah, I think famously there was a couple. Find a bitch from To Catch a Predator, Miles. I'm looking, I'm looking. Thank you. Come on, get out of here, bro.

But yeah, she's huge. Like, I didn't realize how big she was in terms of following. Oh, dude, maybe he caught no female predators, dude. You might have been right, my dog. Yeah.

Come on, Seth. I don't think there was one. Come on, Seth. Come on, Chelsea knows his predators. Come on, Seth. Boy, out of here. What about all these female teachers who fuck the students?

Man, why you bringing up that shit? Yeah, boy, bring up all this shit. She's not a teacher, bro. She's an artist. Hey, none of these artists want to fuck your kids, parents. I mean, she's a goof

for sending lingerie to a 15-year-old. Like, you're just an idiot because you should be thinking, like, oh, this could potentially go wrong.

She says it in the live stream. That's the point. What did she say? So literally, like, the kid's talking, he's like, oh,

let me have it. Like, send it to me. Or like, oh, something to the effect that he expressed interest in it. And then she basically was like,

oh, yeah, we're definitely going to send it to him. It basically was like, yeah, we're definitely gonna send it to him. It's gonna be so funny. We're gonna send him his parents are probably gonna be like, my gosh, why is this girl sending my kid lingerie, whatever, and then send it to him. Like in the moment, she's even recognizing how crazy it is and it still did it. So this is ridiculous. This whole thing is ridiculous. She also shouldn't be confiding personal information to children.

What did she say? It's not sexual, I don't think, but it's just weird. Like why are you friends with kids? Yeah, that's weird. You ever talk to kids, bro? Yeah. Y's not sexual, I don't think, but it's just weird. Like, why are you friends with kids? Yeah, that's weird. You ever talk to kids, bro? Yeah. Y'all annoying, man. Bro, I'm hanging with my nephews. I don't know how many times I ask them, so what's school like?

Every question is, what is school like, bro? You got friends at school, what's school about? And that's the whole conversation, every day. And it's constant just being like, yeah, that sounds crazy. Because you're just like, can we get out of this, please? If cuz it's like you know, it's gonna get out of this She was doing this on Twitch should be totally okay If she was just on Twitch confiding, whatever the fuck she was confiding Yeah, and it would be the same age people watching you can tell everyone you just can't tell anyone. Yeah

How many people were in that group chat? Oh, I don't know the exact amount I don't think it was a lot. It is a handful handful of like 15, 20 something. And what was inappropriate that she was confiding in? So the Trisha Paytas photos is one thing that people bring up. So Trisha Paytas has an OnlyFans and apparently she was sharing the photos from the OnlyFans of Trisha Paytas in a group chat that had minors in it, in like a mocking way. What were the photos? I don't know.

Was it nude photos? Was it photos of her dog? God, the worst kind of thong surfing. It says adult content. Thong surfing? Thong surfing, bro. That's pornographic, bro. Yo, what really happened to y'all? Y'all got so... Y'all feeling insecure now about your position.

Not at all. Really not at all. You were really wild for that one. Y'all are crazy, bro. Said, surf it. I felt less insecure as it went on because when you started, I was like, am I crazy? And then all of us were like, nah, he's crazy.

Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. Wait till your wife gets some dude friends to surf and we're going to see you keep the same energy. Okay, I'll wait. Wait till your wife. I'll wait.

Wait till your wife. I'll wait. Wait till your wife. You guys are just in a position where you know your wife isn't going to do that shit. Yeah. So you have an answer.

Yeah, because she wasn't doing it before I met her. But she could find Serpent. I posted about it all the time. She could find Serpent. There's no new shit. See? There's no new shit. See?

We have new shit. We do new shit together. But what if she wants to do it? You over here? You doing a pod? You're away? What if she wants to go do some of that shit with her and her dude friends? But that's the boundaries that we

set prior. So you like Jonah. You and Jonah are the same. No, he's completely different. So your only issue is that she did it before him. Yeah, you can't get with somebody and then just try to change them completely. Like she did this. Have you met women, bro?

Have you met women, bro? Any woman saying this shit is toxic is crazy when they try to change us completely after they meet us. Every single one. I mean, you a whole bitch. You know what I mean? Wasn't much change. You know what I'm saying?

This motherfucker was a savage, dicking down everything before he got married. Bro, this motherfucker was dicking him down. That's a good point. Straight dick. Dicking everyone down. Everybody. You don't remember that?

No. Punching dick in bitches. I was doing that. That was me. That was him, bro. I missed this. I thought you was a loser all the time.

You was locked up sucking Swedish cocks probably, dude. Yeah, dude. If you were dating a girl and she said, yo, you can't do stand-up anymore, that would be crazy. Don't even stop it, bro.

What do you mean? Stop thinking. Stop thinking, bro. What do you mean? You're making all these other girls laugh. That makes me uncomfortable. What do you mean? She's like, why are you making all these other women laugh?

Wow. Why are you doing Crowder with other women? Why are you talking about? Aphrodisiac. Laughter is an aphrodisiac. These girls are getting turned on. You're making them laugh. Being all vulnerable is such a- Why are you doing Crowder with other women? Why are you talking- Aphrodisiac. Laughter is an aphrodisiac. These girls are getting turned on. You're making them laugh. They're getting so horny when you laugh.

Being all vulnerable with all these other women. No woman would ever say that because they want nice things. Dumbass. No woman's ever going to ask you to stop doing the thing that provides for your lifestyle. But you're such a smart, talented guy. You could get a different job that doesn't have that. You know what I mean? Yeah.

Women don't believe that. They believe this is your talent. Keep doing that. You know what I mean? Yeah. Women don't believe that. They believe this is your talent. Keep doing that shit. Keep buying all this nice stuff. Come on. That's a ridiculous question. Let's say I had a hobby.

Oh. It was talking to bitches in the park. And she was like, yo, can you stop that hobby, talking to bitches in the park? But that's how you met her, let's say. I was like, that's how we met. She was like, yeah, that's how we met. Now that stops because you might meet someone else. Exactly. That's what

they're afraid of. Exactly. You met me that way. You're going to meet someone else. That's what Jonah's thinking. We met surfing. You might meet someone else. Did they meet surfing? Yeah. I don't fucking know. Who cares? It was your scenario, which was that's how you met me. That's all I'm trying to say.

Why are you guys thinking that this is ridiculous when you all agree with it? Y'all just too pussy to say the same thing. Yo, y'all need to put some boundaries on your ladies, bro, for real. Y'all need to boundary up your ladies, bro. Y'all need to boundary them up. Out of bounds, bro.

Sometimes they be stepping out of bounds. Oh, man. If you could bust that whistle right there. If they be stepping out of bounds. Oh, man. If you can bust out a whistle right there. If I actually could whistle right there. Can we edit that? Can we put a whistle in? Put a whistle in. Thank you.

Thank God. Y'all really, really. Y'all just. You wild for that one. I'm wild? You're really wild. I'm wild? You're wild for that one.

I'm wild? You need some rules, Al. Al, Al. Yo, Al's one of those. Wait, but what about the Kiki Paula situation? What he said? The Kiki Paula situation. What about it?

What about it? I mean, what about it? How are you feeling in that situation? Kiki can do no wrong. Respect black women, bro. Respect black queens. Respect black women. Kiki can do no wrong.

Oh, my God. Come on, beautiful black woman like that, just trying to have a nice night out with Usher. Come on. Kiki can do no wrong. Winnie Harlow low-key was disrespectful when she curbed Usher the next day. Oh, I see.

I was disrespectful. Can you curb Usher like that? Can you stop calling it curb? Curb. Curb. She curbed him. Kicked him to the curb. Yeah, kicked him to the curb. Curbed Usher like that? Can you stop calling it Curb? Curb. Curb. She curved him. Kicked him to the curb. Yeah, kicked him to the curb.

Curb Usher. Curb Usher like that. But for real, what would you want your girl to do in that situation? Get sung to? Would you? Yeah. You would want her to get sung to? Absolutely.

Nah. We out. I want to get sung to by Usher. Say what? I want to get sung to by Usher. Really? Say what? I want to get sung, too, by Usher. Really? What song would you like? Any one. Which one? He got hits. All of them. What's your favorite one? There Goes My

Baby? Yeah, there we go. Low-key, this is great PR for Usher's Vegas presidency. Oh, dude, dude, we need to go. We need to go. We need to go. We need to go. 1,000%. Unbelievable. And he's so incredible, and he's so fucking talented. So he deserves all the attention.

He deserves the flowers. I'm glad the younger generation is fine about Usher. Yes. That's another reason I wouldn't be insecure about my girl being fine about Usher, because he's too old for it. She don't know nothing. That's the other thing. There was that girl.

She don't know Usher. What's the girl? Saweetie? Saweetie was getting sung to by Usher, and she wasn't reacting to it because she don't know no words. That's all. She didn't go through this. She doesn't know U-S-H-E-R-R-A-Y-M-O-N-D. Let me tell you what you want to do with me.

Oh, fuck. My bad. Got to send it to Joe. Got to wait. Don't point at me. You didn't know the words. You didn't know the words. No, no.

I knew the words. I fucked up before you fucked up. No, I just knew that there was an N word coming up. That's why my body shut down. My body shut down. I was like, my body shut down. Wait a minute. Nope.

I was like a submarine, bro. Implosion. Seven o'clock on a time in my drop top. You'll have to bleep that, though. I got a real pretty, pretty little thing that's waiting for me. See these youngins don't know shit. I know it. I know it.

I pull up, anticipating. Good love, don't keep me waiting. I got plans to put my hands in places I've never seen. Girl, you know what I mean. Let me take you to a place nice and quiet It ain't no one that's ever been to Rome Ain't got a rush I just wanna take it nice and slow Don't let us sing New York Girl!

Don't let us sing New York Girl! I pull up and anticipated. Ain't anticipating. Good luck. Don't keep me waiting. Wait, we just sung it. We skipped one. We kind of just repeated the same thing. All I'm saying is us are going to have your girl drip, drop, drip, naked, getting butt fucked. So be careful.

So be careful, y'all. Be careful. That's what you got to do is be careful when be careful Be careful That's what you gotta do Be careful When you go to the Ursa show Oh my god Nah I wanna go now

Shit We gotta go Yeah let's go We gotta go Gotta get something to Let's bring our girls We fired dude Come on bro

Date night dude Some boundaries Boundaries Boundaries We need boundaries, bro. My girl, I'm trying to get something. I'm jealous. I'm kicking her out of here.

I can't believe y'all want your girls to be surf instructors losing ass. Y'all are crazy for that, bro. Y'all are really crazy for that. Come on, bro. You want your girls job in a bikini? You were a surf instructor, bro. I'm a man! It's different.

I'm built different, Mark. What if that girl showed up? Would you say, yo, you can't be wearing that around me. I'm a married man. Depends. She got a man. She dating Jonah? We still filming you peoples? We still filming you peoples? Put a fucking shirt on, yo. Put a fucking shirt on. Put some pants on.

Put some jeans on before I take it out of here. Wear your slacks. Put your fucking jeans on, yo. Surf trousers? Get your dungarees on, yo. Tired of this shit. You was a surf instructor in the fire island? Wow, son.

You a wild boy over there. Yo, are you for the LGBTQ or are you against it? Yo, gays can surf, too. Gays can surf, too. Are they good at it? Say what? Are they good at surfing? Very.

Really? Very. They had your ball leaking for a week. Tandem. Surf more. Tandem. Had your asshole leaking for a week, boy. Come on, son.

Come on, son. My asshole never leaks. Not once. Only in Bodrum and Saint-Tropez and Amalfi did it leak violently. Oh, my goodness. Are you ever going to go to like a third world country, like Africa or some shit? Like safari? Africa's not a country.

I mean, that's just fucking insane. That was great. Like, yo. That was crazy, though. Stop behaving how you dress for like two seconds, bro. I know, dude. That was literally an insane thing. I was trying to gear to a joke.

Bro, he fucked up multiple times. A third world country like Africa, like safari. Neither of which are countries. What a fucking dumb guy. Safari's a country, right? Third world country has a country. No, he's a terrible rapper, dude. Safari, man.

Come on. I got plans to put my hands in places I've never seen. Girl, you know what I mean. Let me take you to a place nice and quiet. There ain't no one there to interrupt. Girl, got a rush. I just want to take it nice and slow You really don't know this song.

Never heard this song. Since we've been waiting for this for so long Making love until the sun comes up, baby I just wanna take it nice and slow Akash, go with the solo. Ah, forget it. Now tell me, do you wanna get freaky? I fuck you right out real, I fuck you right out real

I fuck you like a surface structure never made you feel Those are the lyrics? I fuck you right out real, I'm fucking right out here. I'm fucking right out here. I'm fucking right out here. If he says that, it's a song. You can't let them be surfing, bro. You can't let them.

Thank you. Thank you. My bad. I did not know that was a lyric. You can't let them be out there surfing, bro. Wow. Surfing is crazy. My bad.

Yo, you guys are insane people, bro. I realize how crazy that song just gets out of nowhere. Out of nowhere? It's just like loving sensual and then it's like, I'm gonna fuck this shit out of here. Surfboard? Come on, bro. God damn. Shout out to Usher. He's a fan. Oh, I thought you were talking about Beyonce.

Beyonce. That was a crazy, crazy line. Surfboard? Surfboard? Riding on that wood, right on. Surfboarders? And Daisy not built like a surf, crazy line. Surfboard? The surfboard? Surfboard? Riding on that wood right on? Dude, surfboard is? And Jay-Z not built like a surfboard, really. Like, you know what I mean? Like, he not, he more boogie board or something. Like, you know, like, or, you know, something else.

Like, beanbag pillow. Beanbag pillow. Beanbag pillow. I guess it doesn't hit the standards. It doesn't sound as good. What other things could he be a fan of? Al, you got anything? Yo, Al, you ain't got nothing? Come on, bro. You're going to go to the brunch next year no matter what.

You're going to be at the Roc Nation brunch. God willing, baby. Al, Roc Nation brunch or the Hamptons party of Rick- Oh, Michael Rubin. Oh, that's hard. That's, ooh. Yeah, it's not even a fan. It's a fan.

It's a fan. It's a fan. It's a fan. It's a fan. It's a fan. It's a fan. It's a fan. It's a fan. It's a fan. It's a fan. It's a fan. Rock Nation brunch or the Hamptons party of Rick? Oh, Michael Rubin. Oh, that's hard.

That's, ooh. Yeah, it's not even a question. I don't know. It's that fucking Michael Rubin party because Jay-Z was there anyway. Ooh, get the twofer. Yeah. Yeah, you might. And black people look good in all white, too.

Yeah. You guys do look very good. We do. You look very good in all white. It's a good contrast. You look very good. Puffy used at all i do that yeah very good puffy used to throw that party though right when we were i always thought it was puffy's party he does the new year's oh puffy's always new year's back in the day no no he used to do a white party

had you guys heard of michael rubin before this mm-hmm isn't he owned the 76ers and then he started getting publicly famous because he really helped to get Meek Mill out of jail. Sent him to the helicopter off of there. Because of this, I heard him on all the smoke, and I was like, who is this guy everybody loves? And I was like, this guy seems great. Great answers to every question,

seemed honest in a way that was not gross. He just seemed like, I was like, oh yeah, I would love this guy. No, I'll invite me to the white party. Oh, I'm free next year. You want no invite me to the white party oh i'm free next year would you not go he's one of the good ones would you want to go one of the good ones like what do you mean like of the blue squares or no the good whites he's one of the good ones oh square oh he's a blue square oh blue square yeah um would i go yeah would you go? Are you kidding? If I wanted to go this year, but...

Oh, shit. Stop. Are you kidding me? Doug could find a way. I just took it back. I was like, you know what? Plus one would be hard, but he could get himself 100%. You're lying if you say you wouldn't want to go.

Put it this way. It looks way more fun than the Met Gala. Oh, yeah. Absolutely. This looks like people are getting drunk and just being goofy, and they're not wearing some uncomfortable fucking outfit that they came to move around in. Outfit is so easy. Linen? Yeah, exactly.

Now, the only thing that would make me feel potentially uncomfortable is if I wasn't going with anybody that I knew. Because I could imagine it being really isolating. Yeah. Do you know what I'm saying? But if you had like six people there and you're just people watching the most famous people,

everybody there is people watching. Yeah. Right? And everybody there is the most famous like in their little sphere. You think there's a few people

that are like the alpha still that everybody's watching? Like in my mind, Jay-Z, everybody's still looking at Jay-Z. Of course. And Jay's probably not looking at that many people. Of course. Yeah. That's crazy. And there's somebody there that Jay-Z is like's still looking at Jay-Z. And Jay's probably not looking at that many people. Of course. Yeah.

That's crazy. And there's somebody there that Jay-Z is like, there's like some art collector there that Jay-Z is like, ugh, I hope I get to talk to him. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I think maybe that's the cool thing about it. You see people act like fans to other famous people. I was just thinking meeting everybody like the networking would be crazy.

Even if you don't get anything out of it, the opportunity, you have to say yes. He'll probably get made from that say yes he should get 10% it's like Shark Tank this is like rich motherfucker Shark Tank and then you're gonna blame the Jews

for taking 10% again I mean I would how did you do that how did you do we're having just a fun conversation you need to get ahead of the story

when he comes out Illuminati and then you're like you're in the story you're the media don't worry about it what do you mean you control it.

I like Jews. I like most Jews. This one I'm not so fond of right now. Yeah, when it brought it up. I was just saying he was a good white. Yeah. I didn't know he was Jewish. I didn't.

Come on. I don't think about that. It makes sense when you say it, but we don't think about it beforehand. That's what I'm saying. When you say it, we're like, oh, yeah, obviously. But we don't think about that It makes sense when you say it But we don't think about it beforehand That's what I'm saying When you say it we're like Oh yeah obviously But we don't think about it I don't think black

If you see a collection Of cool black people Around a white guy There's a 99.9% chance He's a Jew There's a 99.9% chance He's a Jew Black people don't have good Jewdar

Yeah Because we don't Most minorities don't know We don't have good judar. I don't. Yeah, because we don't, most minorities don't know, we don't, we don't like. No, like, successful whites that are not Jewish

don't want black people around. That's probably true. Yeah, like a really rich, like, white, white guy, not Jewish, would never throw a party

and then just be like hugging up with a bunch of black people. Warren Buffett's never hanging with Joel Embiid. Yeah, it's like, how do I get the fuck away from everybody that's not a billionaire? It's really endearing that he would hang out with bunch of black people. Warren Buffett's never hanging with Joel Embiid. Yeah, it's like, how do I get the fuck away

from everybody that's not a billionaire? It's really endearing that he would hang out with so many poor people. Like, he would throw a party with all these poors. Compared to him. Relative to him. He's a fucking billionaire. He's there.

Okay, so Jay, I'm not saying black people are poor. I'm saying they're all these people who... Oh, all the other people. Yeah, like, there's... To him, Jack Harlow's poor. They don't matter about race. Yeah, they're all poor. You're millionaires.

That's fucking adorable. That's how we look at hundredaires. You know what I mean? Exactly. Like, if he's big billion... I don't know how much money he's got, but if he's big billionaire, he can be hanging out with fucking Buffett.

He can hang out with Amazon and all those guys. That's their crew. And he's decided to hang around with... Little... What's his name? The baby? Little baby. Little baby. Like, that's cool name? Lil Baby. Lil Baby.

Like, that's cool. That's adorable. $11 billion. He's got $11 billion. Yeah, I mean, that's big boy. You're looking at Jay-Z like, catch up. $11 billion. Robert Kraft is $10.

I didn't know that. $10 billion. Most of that's probably his NFL team, though. That's what's crazy is they don't have the same valuations as NBA teams. I don't even know if he's the sole owner of the NBA team. I don't think he is. Wow, you don't got that cute valuations NBA teams. I don't even know if he's the sole owner of the NBA team. I don't think he is. Wow, you don't got that chewed up. Fanatics is worth tens of billions.

I don't know what his share is, but something else too. Let's say it's $10 billion, right? What is 10% of $10 billion? A billion. That's $1 billion. 5% of $10 billion. It's $500 million. That's the interest he could be making on his money a year.

So just, this is when you see billionaires doing this stuff that like, they're like, That's so crazy. Why are they flying a helicopter to their yacht? Schultz-y loopholes. Let's go, baby. Think about it. They can't spend the money. So much is coming back.

They're at terminal velocity. So much is coming back that you have $500 million to spend. If you don't have a drug addiction or a gambling problem, you can't spend $500 million and not have assets in a year. Think about $500 million. That's just interest. So, of course, let me get the private jet and fly a bunch of all these people. I love the fact that he's being generous. I love the fact that he's spending a few million on this party.

It's nothing. The interest is paying you back. That's if he has it all cash. He has it in investments and that kind of stuff, sure. Don't billionaires want to be loved and they're afraid that the poor are going to rise up against them? If they were smart, they would just want to be anonymous. That's why I think real billionaires are mostly anonymous. Also, by the way, why don't they just go around just giving out money?

The thing about it like this, too, was Fanatics. Fanatics went from trading cards. It's going to become a huge betting platform. I think he had to sell his stake. In order to buy the 76ers? Because now he's going to sports betting. So this, anyway, makes his brand look just that much better and cooler. Oh, it's a huge brand.

Huge. I mean, I'll be honest with you. I think it was last year there was one. Was it last year? Yes. And then this year? Those are the only two I've ever heard of it. I only knew of a white party with Puffy.

Yeah, I had never heard of it. I never heard of it until this year. This year, it feels like this has been going on for 20 years I didn't know about. With the coverage, the press coverage. I know it has been going on for quite some time. Yeah. Because I've heard about this party for a while. I don't know.

I'm just saying now it just feels, and granted there was COVID and these other things, Dude, to get celebrities to be in the Hamptons in July when they could be in Italy or France or Greece. Like, they're choosing to be. The Hamptons is nice, don't get me wrong, but you're still in New York in July. Yeah. You know what I'm saying? Like, it's not the best time, right? But for them, he's making that cool again, and it's now part of his social calendar. It's impressive.

So now whatever it was for the rest of Europe, they're like, you're there, then you go. Yeah. Where does everyone stay? Like, just hotels and shit? They rent these houses in the fucking Hamptons for $50,000 a week. Like, it's insane. Does he set it up, or they have to figure it out? No, they have to figure it out.

And I'm sure he houses a certain amount of them. I was listening to the All Smoke podcast, and I think it was Matt Barnes was like, I got my suit ready. And it didn't sound like he had been invited yet. But I felt was he hadn't been invited yet, but he's like, hey, I can come, right? Like, it's just crazy to listen to this guy. And again, I could be misreading, but he was like, hey, I got my white suit ready. And Michael Rubin was like, yeah, I could be misinterpreting. I'm curious how he manages that.

That's how sought after it is. That's the interesting part to me. How do you manage it? Because, you know, everybody wants to go, and there's going to be somebody who's too famous to ask, but not famous enough to be invited. Yeah. That is going to ask you. And they're going to say it, and you're going to have to handle that. That's a tricky thing.

Stephen A. Smith. Oh, that was hilarious. No, what happened? Stephen A. Smith had a video that was like, why wasn't I invited? Oh, wow. On his pod. I mean, that is kind of true.

Like, I'd want Stephen A. there. Or do you not want the media guy there because then it makes all the athletes feel uncomfortable letting loose. But I think they know that he's seen it all and they're still. Still, if I'm an NBA player or if I'm in any athlete. If you're James Harden and your whole reputation is you don't love basketball, you love

strippers and boos. I don't even want to see the guy who's been criticizing me for this. Yeah, 100%. Can't have any media there. I think it's also he likes the cool factor. So just because Stephen A is that guy is like nobody's looking at it yellow. Stephen A is so cool. Wait, wait, wait.

Break down. I think Michael Rubin really likes the cool factor. So he has all these cool, influential people. Because like little baby is like. Stephen A is cool for a journalist. Yeah. But he's not cool. He's not.

Is that your point? Oh, I see. That's why I think how they come up with the invite list. The invite list. Like, who has the clout? Yeah, but then you got to tell somebody you don't have the clout. You don't have it. You ain't got it.

But I don't think it's him. But that person might have your number. You're going to see them. Like, you're going to see them at games. You know, like, that's what I'm saying. Yeah, that type of shit is anxiety. You might even just say, you have to just lie or just be like, it's not out of my hands. My people handled it.

They got their way. I don't. You know, the craziest thing is Michael Rubin probably has a lot of close nerdy friends. They're super close. They're like, sorry. And he's got to say, this ain't really a party. This is a PR spend. And I unfortunately can't have you guys here for it.

We're all going to go to Saint-Tropez this fucking summer together and we're going to take the jet and it's going to be amazing. You guys are going to love it. But this specific party has to be done in this way and you just need to accept that. And I imagine that these people,

if they're also titans of business, are going to go, yeah, I don't give a fuck. I don't even want to be in this stupid charade. It is funny though, people always want what they don't have. The one thing a lot of billionaires are missing is that, I'm assuming. So they might be like, what the fuck, bro? I just want to go meet these people.

That's it. That's all I want. Billionaires probably also don't get told no very often. Oh, yeah. So if it does, they do. Also, no billionaires being told no by Ruben. It's going to be his friends, his head accountant that he has a personal relationship with. And I imagine you have enough room.

I don't know. We should ask him about that. That's interesting. How do you handle the politics of it? And the invite list to get one person to be a domino fall for all the other people. Exactly. Oh, Jay-Z's coming. Like, hey, man, I'd love to have you come out.

I think a couple people are coming out, Jay-Z or whatever. And then everyone's like, oh, yeah. How did it start? How do you get the pieces together? It's like a movie. You get Tom Hanks to sign on for a movie. Everybody else is easy. You get Tom Brady to be the quarterback of your team.

Everybody else is coming. I'll play for the minimum. And what is the promotional tool here? Is this for Fanatics or is this for his personal brand? I'm sure you love the fact that everyone's saying your name as much, but Fanatics is definitely being, from this founder and CEO of Fanatics, throwing the coolest party with the coolest people.

They might become brand ambassadors and not be fucked over like FTX. I think they actually trust him. I think a lot of those folks are like, oh, this is aspirational shit. These are Jay-Z's friends. These are Tom Brady's friends. These are these guys, so let's be here. Like, these are Jay-Z's friends. These are Tom Brady's friends. These are these guys. So let's be here. And he's playing love matchmaker.

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Tom Brady and Kim K. You think that was real? I don't know. Rumored. But, you know, can't trust anything. I heard there's another rumor about him and Emily Ratajkowski. Word?

That's what F.A. said. Both of those rumors are out there from the whiteboard. Tom going through it.A. said. Both of those rumors are out there from the whiteboard. Tom. Tom going through it. Going through it. Going through a lot of them. Oh, yeah, I know. Going through the hits.

Yeah, Tom. I mean, I don't know if he's knocking it down in the mansion, maybe. I mean, yeah, what do you do? Who do you date? Yeah. Please not Kim. She'd be ruining too many dudes' lives. I can't.

Come on. Let's keep talking. Yeah, I think Portnoy did a thing about that, too. He was just going crazy. He's like, don't. And I... But he has to have a little fun. He's got to have fun.

But you ain't going to have fun with a Kardashian. They're going to have fun with you. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You've got to be very careful. Yeah. What else we got, boys? yeah. You got to be very careful. Yeah. Hmm. What else we got, boys? What else we got?

Anyway, Salma Hayek got some super fat fucking juggernaut sloppy tits fucking suck them on. You don't have to read a word for word, dude. Oh, I don't? Oh, okay. Anyway, that was the boss of headlines. That was the boss of headlines. But no, for real, Salma Hay high got some Victor Wembin Yamas. She really, she got some Wembin Yamas, dude.

Oh my God, I was like, Wembin Yamadigatsi Shabadidingdong. It was crazy diving in that little pool. Show them little things. 56. I mean, that's crazy. Show them little things. 56. I mean, that's crazy. She's 50. How old?

56. I don't think so. I think she's 53. She got to be a good 53 or 52. That's three years. There's no way she's 56. I know what a 56-year-old tit look like. That's not a 56-year-old tit.

How do you know? I know. Look at Google her age right now and see how old she is. How do you know? I know. Look at Google her age right now and see how old she is. How do you know that? I know it. I know it. I know it.

I know what a 56-year-old titty look like. I know what a 52-year-old titty look like. That ain't no 56-year-old titty, Mark. Look it up. How do you know

the difference, Mark? Look it up, Mark. Your mom, bro. Come on, now. Look it up, bro. Come on. 56. She was born in 1966.

She's from the 60s. That's where she's from. Her parents fucked in the 60s. But here's the thing, Mark. When does a woman get cities? Son, she's damn near 57. When does a woman get cities? I don't want to say it. You say it. Around puberty. Which doesn't happen. Which doesn't happen

for a few years. So you got to lop off a good decade plus from them knocker boots. So them knocker boots probably ain't come around. They got to ask us if we're recording.

You guys are like, yo, when does a girl get tits? Yo, for real, how many bat mitzvahs does she need for them titties, bro? Them titties are minus one bat mitzvah. They didn't start barnyard bopping until the teenage years. So you're saying her titties maybe are 40? I'm saying her titties probably, for premium, if we want to put it 18 to be premium, it starts around 18. Do the math.

Do the math. You got to knock 18 years off of that. What's 56 minus 18? 38. Huh? 38. That's a 38-year-old set of hotch-a-hotch-a's right there. Divided by two.

Divided by two. Divided by two. Exactly. No, that's a 38-year-old set of hotch- hotch that's right there. Divided by two. Divided by two. Exactly. No, that's the 38-year-old said a hotch a hotch. Come on, bro. That's a good point. Yeah. So when you look at them,

you're like, all right, that makes sense. Yeah. These are just young. Yeah, they are. 38, that's young. Ain't nothing younger than 38.

37. No, it ain't, Mark. Oh, really? 37 ain't nothing younger than 38. 37? No, it ain't, Mark. 37 ain't younger than 38. When you really think about it. When you think about it, when you do the math. When you do the math, it ain't. It ain't, Mark.

Do the math. Go, Al. Is she crossing your boundaries? What does that mean? Like if you, if this was your shorty, hypothetically speaking, could she do that? Once you go through menopause, once you have children, you go through menopause, you get to do whatever you want with your body. Surf it up. No, for real, surfboard. Still having titties like that after you push a human being out of you, bro?

You deserve to celebrate. You make some life. You make some babies. You make some babies. I'm learning today. I'm learning today. You go 57 years to fight gravity for 38 of them bitches? Throw them up on the ground, girl. You earned it.

Okay. Okay. 23 years, your titties still sitting up by your chin the way they should be. That ain't nothing to brag about. Oh, they... Did y'all know this rule book? I'm it today. Thank you. I was unfamiliar.

Yeah, we in class. I'm just saying, like, I don't know. No, I'm saying, what's a woman? What is a woman? I'll be honest. What is a woman? Listen, what is a woman? One of my kids.

Listen, when a woman has put her body through childbirth multiple times and lives to talk about it, and her shit is still together? She only has one kid. Show it off. She only has one kid. Ooh! One Mexican. That's it. Yeah.

One Mexican kid. So you know if you snuck out of it with his phone. A documented one. But you know two or three was in there as well. Like, finally we made it. Wow, look at what we get to suck on later. So much fun. Gonna be really tall.

And big. You don't even need an ID anymore, bro. No, you don't, bro. That's crazy. It's so much fun. Going to be really tall. And big. You don't even need an ID anymore. No, you don't, bro. That's crazy. Come on. Look what Al snuck into this country, bro. Snuck himself into his country.

Snuck his... Be careful. Be careful. I'm just saying, you snuck... Be careful. You snuck in without a passport. You didn't even have a passport. Crazy. The crazy thing is that...

Why do you think his mom didn't need a passport to get in? Hold on. Hold on. Hold on. Why do you think? Why do you think? Why are you so confident she was going to be able to get in the country? They're the same fucking age, too.

That's just crazy. Woo! My mom and son are higher. Ain't no way, bro. Ain't no way you're pushing the conversation in this direction. Ain't no way. bro. Ain't no way you're pushing the conversation in this direction. Ain't no way. Hold on. Are you saying your mom's got some bombs over

back? She fed a few bucks to kids before she dropped them. She went there giving aid, bro. That's what I'm talking about, bro. Come on, let's watch her dive into the pool on that water level. Rise up.

Rise up. Come on, rise up. Rise up. Come on. What's the next one? Because whenever titties are on here, we can't concentrate. But we make our best content. I know.

Oh, my. There we go. What the fuck? Oh, my. There we go. What the fuck? Oh, my goodness. The heavies. But that's the thing. You get to that age, you should be able to show off your body like this because it's unique. Oh, goodness gracious.

And the feet. And her billionaire husband lets her do this. Exactly. What do you mean, lets? She gets to do whatever she wants, bro. She created life, bro. Women that created life can dress like sluts because they created life. Of course, they went through it.

They've earned it. They put their body through the grinder. Which billionaire husband is she with? Pino, the guy who's the founder of Kearing Group or head of Kearing Group. Gucci, St. Laurent, Steve McQueen. He's like the LVMH, but different group. A lot of money. But can we just acknowledge what women go through, bro?

And why they should be able to show off their bodies and why the ones who haven't gone through it shouldn't? I hear you. I hear you. What? Y'all don't look at a woman who's like 45 and still in good shape and you're like, God damn, good for you, yo. What you had to do to accomplish that you yo what you had to do to to accomplish that the suffering you had to go through yeah sure yeah i'd be like i'll give them when they walk by i give them a you beat your chest one time i go i give them just one

you know what i mean out of respect do they know what you're doing? Yeah. Yeah. They'd be like, huh? What? Nah, they don't get it. But they should. Why? Should we be able to sexually...

Nope. The answer's no. I'm just gonna stop you right there. What about should we be able to sexually... Also no to that one. No, I wanna hear it. Okay, should we be able

to sexually comment on women over 50? In front of them? Why not? Since they're out of the sexual experience. What the fuck? Like, you can't knock them up, right? So, it can't be that sexual, right?

It's not, like, the purpose of sex is obviously procreation, right? But, so, it's like, it's not really... No. Ale, what are you talking about? No, but for real, I'm just saying, it should be viewed more as a compliment, like, fucking cheerio, bitch. You know what I'm saying?

Come on, Ale. Where do you want to start on that one? I don't know. I don't know where to start. Is the purpose of sex procreation? Girl, come on, girl. Y'all never jet lag start on that one? I don't know. I don't know where to start. Is the purpose of sex procreation? I don't know. I'm like that. Girl, come on, girl. Y'all never jet lagged on horny?

Come on. But don't you think that? No. You just got to turn gay when a sexy older woman is walking by. Oh, wow. Because then you can say all the shit you want. How do you do it? What do you say?

What do you do? How do you do it? I don't know. Put up that video. You know what I'm trying to tell you. That's not actually true. That shit was funny when he went up to the dude. Bro. Bro. What are you saying? What are you doing? How do you do it? I don't know. Pull up that video. You know what I'm trying to tell you. I saw that shit too.

That shit was funny when he went up to the dude. Bro, that shit. You got to say it. Just say what he said. This shit was great. He starts with bitches. He's like. He says, slay bitch to multiple girls.

Slay bitch and then bitch or some shit. He just, a clean bitch and he's like, bitch ass nigga. I'm like, whoa. Slay bitch ass nigga. That's wild, he wild for that. And the dude, the black dude was confused. He was like, I gotta snuff him, but he's gay. It's crazy that you can get away with anything

as long as you're gay. Watch this, slay bitches. Slay bitch. Slay bitch ass nigga. That is so crazy. So yes, you just got to do that. Holding the flag is so funny. So when a Selma Hayek walked by, be like, slay bitch.

So a gay guy could, wait, wait, wait. Feel me on this. You're trying to go undercover. Feel me on this. No, no, feel me on this. A gay guy could compliment a woman sexually. Yes. And it's okay.

Why is it okay? Mark already knows where it's okay. Why is it okay? Mark already knows where I'm going. Why is it okay? It's okay because you know that gay guy is not about that crotch. He don't want that pussy. He don't want it, okay? So it's safe. There's nothing sexual about it because he doesn't have any sexual desires with that fucking cha-cha-cha-cha.

Okay? And that's why. And that's why if we see a 55-year-old woman walking around bucket useless but beautiful. Bucket useless? Bucket useless?

But beautiful, we should be able to do the same thing. Bucket mad dry. Bucket dry. Bucket empty. Yeah. Get your little sandpaper snatched over here so I can sniff it up real quick and give you a compliment.

It sounds very sexual. Yeah, I guess so. Yeah, I guess so. How do we say it like that guy? Slay, bitch. Yeah, just like that. Slay, bucket.

Slay, bucket. Yeah. Ooh, ooh. How do gays hoot like that? Fuck, all right. What else do they do? Ha! Do they go like that?

Get down public. No? Okay, fuck. All right. Shit. Well, then how do we do it like them? We have to find a way to sexually compliment women that we would not sleep with in the same way that gays do it, so it's okay.

Dove, how do you do it? Pretend I'm gay. I know. When you do that act with them, but how do you compliment their looks without it like... No, I just commit to it. Wow. Love it. Love this. Amazing outfit.

Oh, you go close. You gotta go close. Your titties look... I comment like a best bud that's not getting any. Close. You got to go close. Your titties look... No. Outfit. I comment like a best bud that's not getting any. Oh. Oh, fuck. Yeah, give us some tips and pointers.

That's what he's trying to learn. How can he do this? You're best friend Weezy. How do you compliment her? Oh. Yeah, he don't compliment her. You never give one compliment to Weezy. She's like a dude. Oh, wait, really?

Yeah. You compliment us. I compliment your outfit. But you don't think she's a dude. She's a beautiful woman. Yeah, but she's like a dude. Oh, wait, really? Yeah. But you don't think she's a dude. She's a beautiful woman. Yeah, but she's like my nigga. You're saying personality-wise, you're repulsed. Well, she says I'm going. Is that what you're saying?

You're saying personality. There's only one good answer. No, she's like my sister. She's my sister. But she is also not. Yeah, if she says I'm going out on a date. How do I look out? But she's also not your sister.

Also, my stuff, yeah. Doug compliments his sisters. I compliment my sisters. Wait, how do you compliment your sisters? You wouldn't say that they got their meat poking. Yeah, what do you say? When they're breastfeeding the other. I never did that shit.

No, with my sisters, I said, put something on. Hold on, hold on, hold on a second. You tell us how you compliment your sisters. Bro, I was going to say dibs, bro. Come on. Wow. What? Shit.

That's the flaw right there. I need some food, yo. That's the flaw right there. We need some of the chips in here. Wow. So your sister can't. I'm so hungry right now. I like the chips in here wow so your sister can't so hungry you judge you police what your sister can wear absolutely yo my man died when they were in high school no hold on this is important well how did this happen what happened no i just saw a guy

stage dive and almost die i was at at first. Yeah, that was crazy. Okay, listen, back to Salma Hayek. She walks in the room right now. Breasts are on presentation like that. What are you saying, Mark? Are you just going to hit her with the zombie? You got it, bro. She used to it.

That's Salma Hayek. She didn't get it for 40 years. That's true. That's true. So you hit her with that immediately. Yeah, there you go. What will you do after that? Son, nothing.

You know me. I'm going to sit here. You're just going to stop and you're going to be cool. You're going to be cool. You're not going to do Son, nothing. You know me. I'm a senior. You're just going to stop and you're going to be cool. You're going to be cool. You're not going to do anything about it. You're respectful.

You just let it out the system. Let one out. Okay, that's fair. Mark? I just dap her up. Like my boy. I just go for him and then get in there

a little bit, but that's it. Get in where a little bit? In her hand. Like in her hand. I'm not a tits guy. You know what I mean? What? I'm not a tits guy.

I appreciate her personality. What does that even mean you're not a tits guy. You know what I mean? What? I'm not a tits guy. I appreciate her personality. What does that even mean, you're not a tits guy? What does that mean? I'm more into her acting. Stop, bro. No, I think she's also a good actress. Yeah, she is. She's an actress. Because she'll be acting like she don't have them big

tits sometimes. I'll be like, I see you. My little Oscar chick over here acting like, you know, got them yaps down there. That's a role transformation, dude. Like the little sweater pups. Oh, God. Fucking Christian Bale level. She really do. Anyway, Al, what do you think?

I just learned from Doug, so I'll compliment her outfit. What would you say? Your tits look great in that outfit. Would you just flat out say that? No. I would say that sweater fits you very nicely. That's creepy as fuck, Doug. Son, that's creepy as fuck.

That's what Doug said. I'll be right back. I'll be right back. But we don't trust him. You got to piss out your ass right now. No. You can leave it quick. You can hear the bag coming.

Oh, the bags are coming. All right. Miles gets three bucks. Well, you haven't told us what you would say. Oh, yeah. If Professor Hayek sauntered into this room. I would say... Listen.

All right. That's it. Let's wrap this up. Yeah. You don't want me to say what I would say? No, I need to know. Should we stand for Patreon? Oh.

Can you say it right now? I have a line. You have a boundary, actually. I have a boundary. Oh, thank you, sir. Anyway, listen. Patreon. What are you doing, Patreon?

He's a sane cliffhanger, bro. You know what that hypothetically said to a 56-year-old as she walked in here? Nah, he's probably going to meet someone at some point. This guy meets everybody. At the white party, bro. You're going to make her even whiter.

You know what I'm saying? That's facts, bro. That's facts. I wouldn't do that, though. That's disgusting what you're saying. What? Give her your jacket? Oh, I see what you did there.

You're covered. And by jacket, I mean jacket. Oh, that was fire. That was heat. That was heat. That was really good. Everyone chill. Guys, we love you.

We appreciate you. We'll see you on Patreon. Peace.