Andrew Schulz's Flagrant with Akaash Singh - DaBaby pAIDS The Ultimate Price

Episode Date: August 3, 2021

0:00 - Start 0:07 - Schulz tells a scary story 4:24 - Paralympics have fire YouTube thumbnails 15:00 - Dov didn’t get any in Europe 21:47 - Dov gets stood up 33:34 - Andrew streaming video games 51:15 - Andrew paying for his new apartment 1:07:00 - Olympics talk 1:32:30 - DaBaby is apologizing 1:54:00 - Twilight is a problematic movie 2:12:30 - Scar Jo sues Disney 2:22:00 - Comedy Store vaccination rules Flagrant 2 is a comedy podcast that delivers unfiltered, unapologetic, and unruly hot takes directly to your dome piece. In an era dictated by political correctness, hosts Andrew Schulz and Akaash Singh, along with AlexxMedia and Mark Gagnon, could care less about sensitivities. If it’s funny and flagrant it flies. If you are sensitive this podcast is not for you. But if you miss the days of comedians actually being funny instead of preaching to a quire then welcome to The Flagrancy. Join the Patreon Asshole Army: http://bit.ly/2xQwHYf

This morning, I read the most terrifying story that I've ever read in my entire life. Okay. And it is from an MMA fighter, BJ Penn. Okay. That was, you guys know BJ Penn, the prodigy, Hawaiian legend, was at a wave pool surfing. Okay. I will not say which wave pool. You guys know how the wave

pools work. You guys have all surfed at them. You haven't, but most of you guys have. The water is sucked into an engine room and then spit back out and that spit back out is what causes the waves. This was at a trial

of a wave pool. I'm, like, getting fucking choked up even talking about it. He's really close to the wall. He gets sucked into the engine room of the wave pool under the water, sucked into where the vacuums are. And the way he describes it was, was like out of a Saw movie. He gets sucked in, water fills up the whole room,

and then water spits out. Water fills up the whole room, then water spits out. But we're talking about massive amounts of energy here, right? So when the water comes in, you're tumbling, turning, he's banging his head

and all these different things. So it's not like they just stopped the pool. There were so many people in the pool, I guess they didn't even realize that he got sucked in. So for a moment of time, like an extended moment of time, he's getting, it's on his Instagram feed. You can read the story. He's getting sucked into this room full of water,

holding his breath, tossed around, water flies out. He has a moment to get his breath sucked back in. I don't know how many times that fucking happens, but he said like, the only thing kept me alive was my kids. I was like, do not die. You have kids. They fucking need you. Do not die. You have kids. They fucking need you. So immediately, of course I hit up my wave pool, dude. I'm like, and he goes, he goes, I'm not the type of person to call out a place like this. You know, you invite someone over for a barbecue, they twist their ankle, then they sue you. That's

fucked up. Like they invited me over here for this. So I'm not going to shit all over. But basically what they did is they put grates in front of the engine room like suction spaces so now you can't obviously go through the grate why they never thought of doing that before is fucking unbelievable you wouldn't think of that but bro i'm watching this and i'm like the whole time i love the wave pool because i'm like i don't have to deal with sharks i don't have to deal with all this other stuff if i bang my head somebody scoops me out of there i stay alive and all of a sudden my biggest fear ever i'm trapped in a fucking water chamber right just slowly drowning and then oxygen slowly drowning that's indoor jaws it's it's fucking that's crazy so how did he get out he just got pushed out or they stopped the pool i either got pushed out

or they stopped it and they were able to get him out or something like that i'm not exactly sure but imagine how fucking terrifying and like the sustained terror and he goes literally being in the ring with these fucking animals my whole career like got me comfortable in times where most people panic he goes and i'm sure that shit helped yeah dude now when you almost died in hawaii when you got your toes yeah on the coral yeah Yeah, when I got... What kept you alive? What did you think about in that moment? You guys, my kids. I was thinking about my kids, thinking about how much you guys needed me,

and I was like, I got to survive this thing. Honestly, bro, just leave us in the will. I didn't think about my girl not sleeping. I was like, these motherfuckers are going to rip me! And when I almost drowned in Hawaii, the reason I had to survive is because I gave everyone so much shit for not allowing me to surf. The hotel was like, you can't surf.

I had to ask all these locals to see if I could get a surfboard. I rented a guy. I dropped it off. Anonymous dude comes and drops it off. I think this guy's name was Nick. But we don't know if Nick even exists. And they're like, you shouldn't do this. It is very dangerous.

And I'm like, oh, it's just what they tell a bunch of fucking Howleys to come. I'm a surfer. I know how to do this shit. And literally the second time, my fucking toe got caught in that coral. And I almost died. Anyway, a new Shred with Schultz is going to be announced soon. So I'm going to send you to a wave pool near you. No, don't get shredded while shredding, bro.

For real, shred it. No, but they fixed the problem. They put the grades. It can't have happened. I spoke to my wave pool guy. But that's fucking insane, right? That should be at every wave pool for surfing, period. Yeah. Yeah, like why would they not have it? That's insane. Fucking water Can't have happened. I spoke to my wave pool guy. But that's fucking insane. That should be at every wave pool for surfing, period. Yeah.

Yeah. Like, why would they not have it? That's insane. Fucking water parks. It's crazy. You wouldn't have that. Yeah. I really want to know how he got out.

Like, I wonder if he, like, got spit out, like, dolphin style and shit like that. You just see him jumping out the wave. He got launched out. That's the only way I could catch a wave. He would need to get sucked in and then pushed out on the wave. Yeah, that's the only way I'm catching a wave. Okay. I'm sorry to start it on such a tragic note. so let's libel it up a little bit, okay?

If you want to see the greatest thumbnails you'll ever see, I would love to. It's going to sound like I'm a piece of shit for saying this, but the greatest thumbnails you'll ever see on all of YouTube. And keep in mind, they know exactly what they're doing, and they got me, and it was successful. It's not your fault. It's not my fault at all. They know exactly what they're doing, and they got me into a successful. It's not your fault. It's not my fault at all. They know exactly what they're doing. They're gaming your brain. They're gaming my brain.

And somehow the YouTube algorithm found out that I'm going to click on, no matter what Paralympic sport there is, I'm going to click on it. But especially if it's swimming, right? Because they're missing the swimming shit. Let's just be very honest about what's going on. Once they get pushed into the pool, right? They just kind of fall into the pool, right? It's like when the, what is it called? South Pole.

You know, when the fucking, the ice falls into the water? What are they called? Glaciers? Glaciers? Glacier. So it's just human glaciers, right? Also penguins. It's the same thing.

They're built very similar. They're literally penguins. It's crazy. So at first, the thumbnail is. They're still very similar. They're literally penguins. It's crazy. So at first, the thumbnail is this. The thumbnail is this. And let's just, I'm not trying to make jokes.

Everybody knows what's going on. These are Olympic athletes, so we're not making jokes, okay? They can swim faster than me. It's also more amazing that they can swim. It's so much more amazing.

And also, why do we watch the Olympics? It should only be Paralympics. Yes. We can all do these things. Watching people who shouldn't be able to do them, do them,

is unbelievably impressive. They're just iPhones. They're just dropping iPhones into the pool. And they're like, there's no way that they're going to be able to swim. There's no way. That's not true. iPhones float. iPhones float.

These guys are not. That's not true. Dude, it's unbelievable. Okay. So they're all at the edge of the pool. And I'm like, is there just a guy whose job is to go doink and then just push them in? Like, what the fuck is going on? I think they line up a bunch of them and it's like dominoes.

Bro, when it was backstroke, I had to watch backstroke because that's the most impressive one, right? Right. Because. So, so, so, right. And if you don't have any arms to hold on to the side of the pool because backstroke, you start in the pool. They have a string you hold on with your teeth. Right? Or the neck.

They'll do the bottom of the neck. If you're looking right now, the second picture is what got me. Are you going to put it right here, Al? Is it right here? The second picture is what got me. This handsome guy, six-pack, shredded, and he's got two chicken wings as arms. Okay? And he does have that. You can't say chicken wings as arms. Okay? And he does have that.

You can't say chicken wings as arms. Why not? Why not? Listen, he knows what he has. I'm not being insulting. The next video after it got me as well. It's Paralympic table tennis. The guy's got a fucking big par racket in his mouth.

Okay? That I want to see, bro. The racket is just hanging out of his mouth. And you know what? He's playing Chinese style where the racket's facing down. Oh, yeah. Which I thought was kind of impressive. Even without arms, he's like, I have a style. You know what he's playing chinese style where the racket's facing down oh yeah which i thought was kind of uh impressive like even without arms he's like i have a style you know they do pick the most pair of pictures son they do it on purpose right yeah like it's not

it sounds like what we're doing is mean we are celebrating this shit it is mind-boggling more impressive that they can do this. Anyone can swim with arms. Anybody can swim with arms. It's easy. Like, Al, why can't you swim? Get yourself out of the fucking wave pool. You got all of your arms. Al still can't swim. He's got too much arms. I'm Paralympics. You see my legs?

You see this guy's legs? That motherfucker got the hammies. I want to see Paralympics. They just put one black dude in the pool. Oh my god, this one girl is showing up in a wheelchair and they just dump her straight into the pool. It's unbelievable. It's unbelievable. Now, look. Go back up.

Oh, all arms. Okay. Go back up. Go back up, Al. Go back up. Now, the thumbnails are unbelievable, and there's a social media person that works for the Paralympics, and they're like, I need to create thumbnails so that people will watch, right?

So they know exactly what they're doing. They're taking the most chicken wang picture of the guy. The guy's not even in the water. It's a swimming thing. They're looking for the most pair of picture they can get. They're looking for the most pair of picture. And the guy is holding a towel with one of his hands. Chopsticks.

He's got... Oh, my God. You're a fucking animal, dude. That's a wild boy. You're so wild. Hot potato. It's hot potato. You're a hot potato. It's a hot potato. You're a fucking animal, Al.

How could you do it? He's holding the towel. But here's the thing. This is why I don't feel bad commenting on it. There's a discussion that went just like this at the Paralympic

YouTube social media team. Oh, that's a good point. It's like, how do we get them to do it? When they're in the water and they look like everyone else? No. No, no, no.

When they're out of the water and people are going, yes. How the fuck is he going to make it across Dude there was a guy There was a guy There was a guy That had one leg

No arms in the head he looked like a ball point pen Okay The guy Is in the water And he is Smoking these motherfuckers. One leg, boom, boom, boom. The elegance, the brilliance.

It was amazing. Just a pogo stick in the pool, swimming way faster than all these other motherfuckers. Some people got two legs, right? There's not a separate one leg. There can't be enough human beings for that. So he's going against two-legged people and whooping that ass.

Whooping that ass. That's a hero, dog. It is unbelievable. That makes me the most patriotic. It is unbelievable. It was so impressive. When is this on? When is this on? He's more fish-like, though. Make Snoop Dogg comment on this. He's more fish-like, though. Say what? If you have one leg, you're more fish-like.

I am a fisherman. Yeah. That's what I'm saying. Holy shit, Al. He got an advantage. Yo, a lot of people should love this guy. He can't take a knee for the anthem. that's what I'm saying he got an advantage a lot of people should love this guy he can't take a knee for the anthem you know what I mean let's think this through he's a patriot he's already given up his knee for the anthem most likely

if you really want to think about it he's given up a leg for his country Al if you don't go up go up there is one there is one right there I mean the thumbnail of it is unbelievable. I'm telling you, Paralympiad swimming. How are the comments? I'm curious.

Oh, I couldn't. I couldn't do it. I couldn't do it. I couldn't do the comments. I couldn't do it. I just clicked to watch the video, and I watched it in good faith. I wasn't looking for jokes. I just wanted to see who won, and I'm watching this guy just go. It was literally a pool noodle.

Was swimming faster than everybody else that was in there. It was unbelievable. And they know what they're doing. Look at the fucking table tennis. I got to watch the table tennis. Please, Al, put the table tennis on. Now, the question is, do you think you could out-swim the gold medalist? No chance.

Not even close, okay? There's not even a chance. Wow, the first time you can't he throws it up with his foot he throws it up with his foot son what she was not power she was just fat in some countries that's paralyzed bro some countries, that is a big problem. Uh-oh. Oh, okay. Oh, no, she did it. Get the fuck. Oh, okay.

Oh, no, she did it. She got that one. Oh, that went bad? She got that one. Boy, let's go. Did that land in? Yeah, she did. Oh, you thought.

Stupid. You thought. You thought. Also, I don't think. Let's go. Hold on. Here goes our boy. This is un-fucking-believable.

Let's fucking go. Did you see that serve Ibrahim bruh get the fuck out of here dog he's nice I'm super impressed yo also can I say something real quick

and I mean this from the bottom of my heart if you have one arm you're not at any disadvantage with ping pong you only use one arm for ping pong not balanced though

what you need to counterbalance well put a little weight on your leg Alex does with his Tesla when he's trying to drive without driving. The serve is tough.

Serve is tough. Say what? Serve is tough. Ah, that's a good point. Serve. It's serve. That's right. That's a good point with the serve.

Yo, this is fascinating. Nah, we got to take it off. Fam, fam, fam. What is happening right now, son? This, I don't care about. This is easy. I don't care about this. My man who did it with his toe and his mouth, and he was putting crazy backspin,

saliva dripping all over his ping pong paddle. Son, incredible. That's unfair. Nah. That's unfair. What's para about these dudes? Say what? So being a cousin is para too?

Say what? Being a cousin is para? Yes, bro. No, that's a different Olympics. That's a different Olympics. And that Olympics, I don't even want to begin talking about because... Said he jumped up by the table.

He's not para. Yeah, how do you judge that? No, he can't look at his hands. He can't use his hands. What's he's not para yeah how do you judge that's look at his hand he can't use his hand what's this guy what his hand what do you mean one of his hands looks like he's been beaten off since he's seven years old this shit is locked yeah but that's just miles yeah that fits the ping pong paddle fits like that you're right it's a disadvantage okay let's move away from this because it's about to get sad so uh but you gotta compete what you gotta compete so right now the world record for the men's backstroke, the 50-meter backstroke, is 42.7 seconds.

42. I'd be lasting almost as long as that when I backstroke. Almost, right? My backstroke, I'm about 43 seconds, dog. I can do 43 seconds. I give him a solid 38. Can y'all do 43 seconds, if we're being completely honest, of straight backstroke? No chance.

Like pushing this, like really cracking it open. Can you do 43 seconds? No chance. being completely honest, of straight backstroke. No chance. Like pushing this, like really cracking it open. Can you do 43 seconds? No chance. You talk about it. Which girl? We're talking about Max Power. Max Power. Oh, Max Power.

Can you go Max Power where you see the ripples in the cheeks for 43 seconds? Nah. Can you do it? No. There's no way. No way. Right? Slow throw.

Max Power, dog. Slow throw. Where you keep it in there and then you gyrate the hips like that a little bit. Give him a couple halves. And you pretend you're doing something. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, this is all for you. Nah.

Good boy catching his breath. But max power, just crack, crack, crack. Under seven. Come on, let's take off. That's like running wind sprints. You know what I mean? Who can last that long? Nobody can last that long.

High intensity interval training. Exactly, bro. Yeah, bro. Come on, dog on dog sometimes you gotta leave it in there talk shit yeah i'll leave it there talk shit look at my clock like damn bro let's go that's why you give me the light you gotta get the apple watch that's what yeah i got the heart rate going i got it is so good yeah that'd be such a good if your girl was just like hey uh girls give us the light bro they'd be such a good, if your girl was just like, hey, you got that. Nah,

girls give us the light, bro. They'd be like, I want you to come. That's the light. That's the light. It's time for me to get to work. I have a meeting.

That's a man charitable. That's a great way of putting it. Shit. Let's go. You ain't said it soon enough. It's like your boss telling you you can leave early you can clock out if you want to anyway

guys we're back what's up everybody that was an intense beginning to the podcast I'm not gonna lie yeah we really ran the emotional spectrum from terrifying to uplifting 100% we did it all we got the dovits back we got the truffle the truffle's back from his trip to Italy and Greece or wherever the fuck he went.

And it doesn't really matter. The only thing that matters is he got zero pussy holes. Unbelievable. Zero pussy holes, bro. Who goes to Europe for, what, two weeks, three weeks? Son, he was there for 10 days, bro. Zero pussy holes. You counted every hour.

Son, dude, dude. Zero pussy holes, bro. You speak Italian. You speak the language. Okay? You were staying in castles. It language. You were staying in castles. It looked like you were staying in castles. It was fly shit.

You're at the hottest parties. You're surrounded by uglier guys than you. I agree. There's no joke there. That's a fact. Italians are nice. I was telling just his squad. I was just trying to...

I thought I was going to get a laugh. I thought I was going to get a silence, man. Holy shit. I tried to hit you with agreement. I didn't have to laugh at him. I was like, no, you're right, though. Facts. No.

And then you couldn't manage to sleep with not one girl the whole time. Vala would have taken down minimum three. Vala could go to the pod, yo. Vala King Bachelor over there. He's the real King Bachelor. You're not bait the pod, yo. I'm a king bachelor over here. He's a real king bachelor. You're not baiting me in here. I'm not. It's not baiting.

You were baiting yourself. They already got the right team. You look like that ping pong guy. Just walking around the fill of pumps. What happened? He didn't wear his... I was fine.

One per country. I did my duties. You started speaking Arabic. No, the BMW hat. Thank you. He was... My duties are speaking Arabic Speaking his language. I thought you're trying to connect to I want to cut him off I was giving theimlich for real. You might have needed it. You might have needed it. Go, go.

Be on guard. Be on guard, motherfucker. He's coming back to you. He's coming. I had a weekend off. He's ready. He's loaded. Loose too, son.

Got a workout in. Oh, it's a wrap. Turquoise Al is a different beat. Yo, Turquoise Al. That's a problem, bro. That's a problem, son. I'm about to jump out here like a Paralympic, son. What did's a problem. Jump out here like a Paralympics. Like a Paralympics.

I thought you said the Pacalympics. I was like, all this country got a competition. Yo, who would win? The Paralympics or the Pacalympics? Oh, dude. The Pacalympics. Pacalympics.

100%. 100p. 100. The Indian Olympics, that might be the Paralympics. No, we would lose for sure. You guys are the Paralympics you do have a lot of Paralympics

I think we should be allowed to compete with the Paras playing ping pong with five arms that'd be sick holy shit that'd be way better right that's a great point

we're not letting our gods compete you better fucking kill oh yeah that's right wait do you do you get the fake baseball in the Olympics cricket nah it's not an Olympic sport

it should be can't even make it to the Olympics they got darts in the Olympics and they don't got crickets. They got a bar sport. It's not your shit. They don't got baseball. That's great.

Yes, they do. Yes, they do. What are you talking about? Who's winning right now? Japan. Japan. US. Y'all cucks, yo.

You getting beat by the Japanese at the American pastime? How do you tell you? You got an American flag shirt on, you fucking fraud. What do you mean y'all? What y'all mean y' flag shirt on you. Fuck. Y'all. Y'all. Y'all. Y'all. Y'all.

Y'all. I got to have something. Yo, son. Pick a side. Yeah. Lounge chairs. You see them both, bro? But they're American flags on it.

Yeah. Anyway, back to you getting no pussy. I got. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. You got the best of them.

Wait, you did? Did you get pussy or did you not get pussy? I did. The hella chopper or what? How many? That is the end of the conversation. How many? Enough. Enough, so that's more than one.

In the hell. How many did you take down, bro? Were you ripping clits? Deuces. You got the doublet. Was that the number of girls? Was that the number of girls or the rating of the girls that you slept with? I think it was just one Japanese girl.

I would rather you joke that I got zero girls, but if I got a girl, she was a nine or a ten. Don't ever to me ever again. Oh, don't to me. I'm talking about to me. The to me movement over here. Don't to me. He threw the black girl head movement in there. He got a little dabby. No, but it is true. Duh, duh, duh, duh, duh. He threw the black girl head moving in there.

It is true, Doug. Doug. That's all folks. I got the clobber. I got the clobber. I was too excited. Fuck yeah. You got this girl

What's up Al's color His aura is beautiful right now No he's got a good aura Okay So you did hook up with two girls You're right about that Okay so we hooked up with two girls

So Dove is still Dove We really thought that We really thought that Bala got in your head I'll be totally honest with you Yeah We actually had internal discussions Where we were like

I think we need to build up his confidence Because this guy is just Striking out left and right Yeah I'm not striking out I'm not trying So I got two girls up Never once has cared about over-talking. He never once in the history of the podcast

has cared about over-talking. Al had whole side conversations with Mark during the podcast. He's on the phone. I'm about to say the most vulnerable moment in Dove's life. The lowest point in his life. I tee up the story and Al just goes, guys, the audio quality, please. Dove, it was the day before he went on vacation. the audio guys please yes okay so Doug before

it was the day before he went on vacation it was the day before he has a date with a dun dun dun duh guy Jew broad

oh the first Jew broad that he's dated in how long maybe his life I would say years I would say in years he finally this is gross

goes off the reservation right that's gross I don't know why we're doing this but. He finally goes off the reservation. That's gross. I don't know why we're doing this, but okay. He finally goes off the reservation. A beautiful young Hebrews. A beautiful young Hebrews. A nice Hebrews girl.

A Shebrew. She's a Shebrew. Okay, so he has a date with her, right? All of a sudden, we get a message to the group chat. I need to find these texts. You've got to go get it. I need to find these texts. He was in such go get it. I need to find these texts. He was in such a vulnerable state.

I need to find these texts. He was spiraling. He didn't know what to do. He was spiraling. I need his support from the people he loved. Stood up by this jubress for two hours. He was miserable leading up into the date. He was already miserable leading up to it.

He was trying to get his confidence up before he fucked shixers in Europe. Right? That's what he was trying to do. There was a bunch of guys he had set up in Europe. He was trying to get his confidence up clean the system this jubris knew she fucking knew okay she fucking knew what you were using and sniffed you out she doesn't know some of these guys so um so basically stands him up Stood up Not basically At the altar

Absolutely stood him up Uh huh But the way she stood him up The wild The most disrespectful Do you have the picture We need to have I need the

I'm trying to find the screenshots I couldn't find Was it to the main group chat Yeah It was F2 Miami Or the other one I don't know I mean

Someone please get it up Someone please get it up I mean It's unbelievable This is worth a pause It literally is worth a pause On a podcast Okay yeah I got the I don't know. I mean, someone please get it up. Someone please get it up. I mean, it's unbelievable. This is worth a pause. It literally is worth a pause on a podcast. Okay, yeah.

I got the text here. Okay, go. Go. Do you want the full text? Full text. Go. Some of this might have to be redacted, okay? Go, go, go. But basically, we got a text from Dove.

This is what friends do, asshole army. 8.50 p.m. You have a vulnerable moment. You share it with a half a million people immediately. Oh, shit. Honest to God, guys, I'm being stood up right now. Sitting alone at Ludlow Soho

house. She won't respond to my messages to ask where she is or if she's coming. 30 minutes in. You text like a female. I know, son. That's how you sound when you talk. The sassiness that he hit her with. Oh my God. I thought I was reading

a female thing. That's wild. All right, go, go, go. I understand why she didn't come. My date was a Jew! Exclamation point, exclamation point. The disgust. You hear the disgust?

Yeah, yeah, yeah. And I flaked on a Muslim with the heavies for this. Period. Yeah. Yeah. And then Miles sends a Palestinian flag. At least the Muslim had to keep where she was. And then Dub just sends a picture of wine glasses at the ludlow house empty empty mine and then he started spiraling

right because he he admitted to all of us of what a loser he was because he got stood up and he's like i need to prove that i actually get laid and he just starts taking pictures with random women and inventing backstories like oh yeah oh yeah, I met this girl once in Mykonos and we just happened to be at the bar. You're totally into me. Loving my dick. Next one. Another girl.

It's like five different girls that you randomly bumped into. I had a night afterwards, but those were all real moments. Nah, I don't buy it. I don't buy it, dude. Your response to her. They were all great real moments

with non-Jewish girls. What are you talking about? Can we do the text that you sent to her? Yes, please. Oh, this is... I actually... Go ahead. This is next level. This is how you know he grew up with sisters. This is how you know he was raised by women.

I'm there for an hour and a half, have to lie to the waitress to say, oh, you know, my friend isn't coming for dinner. They're going to be late. We're going to go link up somewhere else. Oh, okay. I didn't want to think he said that. Get the pity bars. We're going to get a drink and then go to a dinner spot. I didn't want to think he stood up. Bro, get the pity bars.

Just get the pity bars. Yeah, we were going to get a drink and then go to a dinner spot. I'm just going to meet him at the restaurant. Yeah, you also could have just been honest. Yeah, just sit here and be like, hey, what time you get off? Right? Yeah, you might seem like a good guy. Like, oh, I was covering for her.

So I go and link up with another friend who's out of drinks. And then I made up for everything. We don't need to know. You don't need to care about that. Go to the text of the girl. Oh, yeah. So anyway, I left. And then she responds back. Are you still there. Go to the text. I left and then she responds back. Are you still there?

The first is just a question mark. This is Dove. Am I being stood up? Head explosion emoji. Please tell me you're dealing with an emergency. Where? She says where. She goes where?

Then Dove sends question mark, question mark. And then she says, are you still there? Dove says, ring me. Is this all for real? And then she says, just the word sad. Are you still there, Dove? And then Dove says, I'm going to be polite here.

I think you're a troubled person and you need some real help. Let me know if you need any support I feel like I did something to her friend or something like this. Can I be totally honest? It was you? No way. You thought you were going to go away for 10 days in Italy, not tell me you're going for 10 days, and you think I'm going to let you go away on a good emotional train? No.

No. I know this girl. We were DMing, and I said, please stand this piece of shit up, because he thinks he's going to go away to Italy for 10 days without telling me. No, it's not a lie. It's a lie. No, it's not a lie.

This was a Raya match. I didn't tell you about this date. You don't think he'd been on Raya, dog? There's no possible way in the world. No, I was on Raya. No, he'd been on Raya. Back in the day, I was on Raya. Should I save you, bro?

No, no, no. I'm still on Raya. I know. I'm just saying. I know this motherfucker. I will riot for anybody he's never met a woman in his life

never met a woman he was gonna go on vacation for 10 days not tell anybody so you know you're gonna get a little punishment before you go on that vacation so I asked her

I asked her if she would stand you up impossible and it worked out perfectly and I told her to say sad impossible I think where'd you say how long are you going for Dove I thought you were going for four days when I found out I was going to say sad. Impossible. I think, where'd you say, how long are you going for, Dov?

I thought you were going for four days. When I found out I was 10, I had to send a DM. Did you just say a work week? A work week. I said I'm taking a week off, right? So it's Monday to Friday. My weekends, that doesn't count. I'm not on the road with you guys.

So if that equals 10 days, those were my 10 days. Five days of work. That sounds like nine to me, bro. I took three days. I took three and I got killed. Yeah. Oh, the next time Mark gets to go see his family, it's a high school graduation of his lease.

He's so motherfucking on a plane. Yeah, yeah. This guy didn't even tell me. I had to find out from this dumb bitch that I had to DM. Just so I could ruin a date. Dude, I really thought he was going to slide off to Italy feeling all good after fucking a Jewish woman. No, dude.

It would have been a good send-off. But no, we had to kill that shit. I need your confidence destroyed. And the first girl in Mykonos? Muslim. Was she really? Moroccan. Wow. I think you end up with a Moroccan girl. I really do. Son, either side?

Peace in the Middle East. Just bring it together. I honestly think you end up with a Moroccan girl. I really do. Son, either side? Yeah. Peace in the Middle East, son. Just bring it together. I honestly think you'll be single for the rest of your life. And die alone. If I do end up with someone, it will be no thanks to you. Yeah, that's true. I can guarantee. No, no, I'm going to hook you up.

I'm going to find a nice girl. I'm going to find a nice girl. All right, guys, we're going to take a break for a second because I got to tell you about the infamous store, Charlotte. I know the weekend was sold out, so we added another show. We added a fifth show, Charlotte, for you guys because you asked. We love y'all. And so go check that out right now.

DeAndreSchultz.com. The Infamous door dates are up. Go look at it. We're coming to Dallas. I think Dallas is sold out. Houston is sold out. Maybe there's some single seats. Then we're coming out to Tucson, LA.

Those might have a couple single seats. Go get them, but then check out Milwaukee, Detroit. We had a second show in Chicago. We had a second show in DC. We had a second show in San Francisco. It's un-fucking-believable. Philly, we're playing the Met. It's crazy.

These venues are absolutely insane. We got a lot of fun shit in store. Cannot wait to be out there with you motherfuckers. The infamous tour. Theandrewschultz.com for tickets. Go now. Do not wait because they will be gone. I'm telling you.

I'm imploring you. Go now or forever hold your peace. Go now. Theandrewschultz.com. And before we go to Akash I just gotta say huge congratulations because my man Akash is sold out in Toronto man

thank you that was wild big moves big moves first show sold out in like three days four days we had the second show

sold out in four hours wow so now we're trying to see if we can find a bigger venue maybe we can have more shows Toronto we're gonna figure it out for you

October 15th, whenever those new dates come up. Amazing, man. Might be 15th and 16th. In the meantime, Naples, Florida, I'm at Off the Hook Comedy Club this weekend, Thursday through Sunday, August 5th through 8th. September 23rd through 25th, Moon Tower Comedy Festival. I'm going to be there.

I might also be there for other things. Who knows? Toronto 15th, we talked about. Atlanta 5th, November 5th, Atlanta. I'm at be there for other things. Who knows? Toronto 15th, we talked about. Atlanta 5th, November 5th, Atlanta. I'm at the Red Clay Comedy Festival. Come through November 11th through 13th, Indianapolis. I'm at Helium. And the DC show has been moved

to December 9th through 11th. They're trying to get us a bigger room as well. So I'm going to be at the Comedy Loft in DC. Check that shit out. And guys, you know I have a studio with Wheezy. It's in Soho, New York. You can do podcasting, photography, just get lit for the gram. Head over to

WTFMediaStudios.com and book your appointment today. Now let's get back to the show. I think it's growth that he's not out here just smashing chicks in Europe, you know? He is. But he just said he did. But only two. I mean, before, how many would you have taken down? I mean, it's not that he didn't want to. He's a quality guy.

Maybe he didn't want to. Maybe, you quality guy. Maybe he didn't want to. Oslo showed up to Mykonos when they had a ban on music, so we literally were bringing little speakers to our table. A ban on music? A ban on music. No, but that works out perfectly for him. I think that he planned that. Because if you're... Footless is his ideal situation.

You're at the club, right? If you're at the club, it's a meat market. It's just visual. You're dealing with club, right? If you're at the club, it's a meat market. It's just visual. You're dealing with guys that are fucking roided out. Big fucking Italians, right? And then you can't do your truffle. And how you get laid is through truffle. It's not through your body, right? So what you do is you find the one place in the

world that says no more music. You bring your boys to that place and you're just truffling it up. Now conversation matters. Now combo matters. All these big, beefy Italians can't talk shit they're dumb you're out there skinny it's money for the story i'm sure there's some beef come on guys we're gonna take some liberties here like me dming this fat girl that he was about to be on a date with. I didn't DM her. I don't even know who that girl is.

But for the story. But for the story, I did have a conversation with her. Chunky little Jew you had there? Oh, yeah. Cutie. No, dude. That was a gefilte fish. That was a big old fucking fresh out of the oven.

You know. Collard bread. What? You can't say that. No. You're crazy, dude. Not that. Ohala bread. What? You can't say that. No. You're crazy, dude. Not that. No.

You guys are. Whoa. Whoa. You are crazy. How would you even think about that? You're a wild wild. I'm thinking about bread. No.

Unleavened bread. That's fucked up she burned you like that. We're always thinking about it. It's a terrible thing. That's fucked up she burned you like that. Yeah. She didn't burn you on that date, so. Real talk.

She really did, dude. Nah, but I do think she was fat. That's probably why she couldn't make it. There was no Uber XLs in the area. Now, can we be honest here? If a girl stood up Vala, do you think he would show up to her house with stones? No, no. Come on, dog. To knock on the

window to say hi. Yeah, just romantically like Romeo and Juliet. With the speaker. And honor killing is among us. We may have to cut this, but Vala's an animal. Vala's an animal.ala's an animal What he did Which first off

He's cooking for us right now Yeah So I don't care I don't give a fuck Go go go So we're in here Friday Playing some FIFA

Have a little visitor Visitor just like Cool person And then I try to hook the visitor up With Miles Yeah And she was about it And Vala wasn with Miles. Yeah. And she was about it.

And Vala wasn't having it. No, no, no, no, no. She was about it. I didn't know Miles was out of town. So I hit Miles up, and I'm like, yo, I got something for you. Good to go. You're good. Son, before, if Vala doesn't know I hit up Miles,

he's already inviting her out to drink. And I set it up for Miles. And he knew that you were setting it up for Miles? He knew I set it up for Miles. He saw the inviting her out to drink, and I set it up for Miles. He knew I set it up for Miles. He saw the confirmation for Miles. Wow. That's fucked up. That's why he's cooking. He feels guilty. He's cooking. He feels guilty, but you know what? Fuck

Miles for ruining Brilliant Idiot's YouTube page. He deserves that. He deserves no pussy until he gets Brilliant Idiot's YouTube page back. Fuck you, Miles. Fuck you, fuck you you fuck you fuck you okay i hope you gain all the weight back that you lost you piece of shit it's unbelievable dude he lost the last 20 episodes of brilliant idiots right it's still gone where do they go they don't just disappear yeah something happened there was some fat hippopotamus girl in his apartment guaranteed just walking over with his keyboard and deleting 20 of the episodes. Like a cat?

Just be five-fold foam. Audio's brilliant. Bitches just hungering hippos. Like, hungering hippos. Maybe it's a girl that's dead up, Doug. Yo. Maybe. You got cucked by Miles, bro.

Dude, that'd be crazy. That'd be wild. A girl who stands you up for miles, son. I miss this so much. No, but we need to have a conversation because I think there's something that happened recently. Uh-oh. I got the fire back, guys.

I got the fire back. I haven't played video games in over a decade. I stopped playing video games because I needed to focus on my career. I thought you were talking about herpes or something. No, no, no, no. Totally different fire. I was still there. I haven't.

Don't go away. That one never goes away. So I went out there and I haven't played video games in over a decade. Right. Okay. I've heard a lot about this.

I've heard a lot about this. Guys, so Chifty's like, yo, why don't we do some streaming? Why don't we set up a stream? I'm like, all right, set up a stream. I don't give a fuck. Mark stupidly challenges me to FIFA.

Now, you have to understand this, and I mean this sincerely. I've never lost a game of FIFA. I've never been beaten in FIFA. Nobody can beat me in FIFA. It's a natural ability I have. I am the greatest to ever play FIFA. You're playing with a trainer on. I'm being honest with you.

I'm being honest with you. Nobody has ever beaten me in FIFA. Talk that shit and mark has obviously dedicated his entire life to soccer he loves it the later part of his life to comedy right but his whole life was dedicated to soccer he really understands the game he he only plays it still plays soccer to this day to this day listen he wasn't chasing pussy i was chasing pussy the guy the guy was playing soccer He was chasing soccer balls. That's what he was doing. Look at how he's dressed. He's playing soccer right after this. He's fucking shredded. He's ripped. His legs are absolutely amazing. Got the fat soccer ass like this guy knows soccer in and out knows the sport Okay, he goes to the gym does soccer drills with a medicine ball.

Bro out of nowhere the guy can do the dribbling soccer drills with a medicine ball. The guy's fucking talented. The guy's talented. I'm not going to take away from a talent, okay? I'm a rival talent. Yeah, son, if IG girls, if you want an ass, you need to do Marquez. You got to do a Marquez.

You got to do a Marquez. Straight up. So what he does, he challenges me to FIFA, right? It should be easy for this guy. It should be easy for him, but he doesn't understand.

Obviously, when he's challenging me, he doesn't understand that I've never been beat in FIFA. And you guys think I'm joking around. I'm literally, and I mean this when I say this, I am the greatest to ever play the game of FIFA.

No, no, no, no, no. It's not even a question. I'm literally. You're the Neo. You were like, you're born in it. That's what it is. It's all it is.

I'm telling you. You're the one. I'm the one. And here's the thing. I haven't played in over a decade. It doesn't matter the year, right? The last one I probably played is 2009, 2006. I don't even fucking know. And here's the thing. I haven't played in over a decade. It doesn't matter the year, right? The last one I probably played is 2009, 2006. I don't even fucking know.

I don't even know when it is. Listen, I don't even know the players of the game. I say, just give me the controller. Mark, remind me what the buttons do. I forget what the buttons do. I forget what the buttons do. Mark reminds me. I go, are we playing national teams or are we playing club teams?

He chooses his club team immediately. He knows it. Liverpool, bro. Liverpool, his fucking team. I just choose the next team that's there, Man City. I don't even know. I just choose literally the next team that's there because it doesn't matter to me. I told him I'd be true with any team.

I said, you could choose my team. You let me have Man City. So I go, fine, I guess I'll take this one. I can't name a single player on Man City. I can't name one player on the team. I don't even know who to go to. It doesn't matter because I have God-given talent. God.

God. God. Hallelujah. Say it again. God. Amen. Bestowed this talent upon me that I will crush the competition if I play them in big It's your holy war.

It is my holy war, and I will be victorious. This is what happened, okay? So we decide to play this game. We start playing. I figure out the buns real quick, and then much, much to Mark's chagrin. Is that the term? Oh, he's chagrining. He's a motherfucker, boy.

This motherfucker was chagrining. Chagrining, boy. Mark was a chagrining out here, bro. Much to his chagrin. You chagrining ass motherfucker was chagrining. Well, Mark was a chagrining out here, bro. Must have hit chagrin. You chagrining ass nigga over here, son. Straight up, son. Al waited for three different times to make sure he knew how to use a word. He was like, I got this one down.

I got this one down. I'm letting it loose. Okay. I'm really hoping Al would come in with it. When he said chagrining. He was like, Mariah Like okay Okay So

So we start playing the game Okay Mark And I was baffled But He's ignorant to my skill level So I understand where it came from at the time But I was baffled

So suck his shit He was a child When you You know When I started playing the game He's a kid He ain't know You know what I mean

He didn't understand this He didn't understand the time that I put into this You have to understand like I was doing like edibles and playing the game. It's like you remember when the spider bit Spider Peter Parker, right like and something happened inside of him When I did the edibles and I was playing the game something happened with my brain my brain changed I can't beat the video game at FIFA But there's not a human being that I can't beat because the game. Something happened with my brain. My brain changed. I can't beat the video game at FIFA, but there's not a human being that I can't beat because the game is all up here. I know what you're going to do

before you do it. I predict everything that happens. I'm seeing it. It's literally like Neo. I'm seeing the Matrix. I don't even see players. I see green shit up and down. It's green shit up and down. And I'm just seeing it. I'm like, okay, boom. Pass. Goal. I put a goal in his pussy hole real quick just to let him know. It's green shit up and down And I'm just seeing I'm like okay boom Pass that goal I put a goal in his pussy hole real quick

Just to let him know I put a goal in his pussy hole real quick Motherfuckers come for me And I gotta let them know And I put the goal in the pussy hole real quick And I got up And I was just like This is a statement goal I have to make

Right? Then The guy scores a cheap goal Right? My goalie kicks it to him And then he just kicks the goal Doesn't even count Right? Doesn't even count Why are you blaming my goalie? Yeah. My goalie kicks it to him and then he just kicks the goal. Doesn't even count. Right?

Doesn't even count. Why are you blaming my goalie? You're the goalie. Yeah, I was stupid because I didn't play the game. You gave him an assist. I gave him an assist. So even when you score,

I still get an assist. That's a great point. So I'm just racking up points left and right. So then he scores another goal. Now he's up 2-1 thinking. He's actually thinking that like he's on a roll now.

Right? The second goal, completely luck. It was a fast break. It was completely luck. I gave him that assist too. He's actually thinking that he's on a roll now. The second goal is completely luck. It's fast break. It's completely luck. It's called the breakaway. Yeah, whatever. He thinks he's up, and I'm looking. I'm like, yo, this guy actually thinks that

if I don't want to turn it on at any point in time, I can't change the momentum of this game. He's actually looking like he's getting comfy in his chair and stuff like that. I'm like, what's going on here? And that's when I decide to take the game seriously. Again, I can't name a single player on a team, but that's when I decide.

And, you know, for lack of a better word, I did. I did take your players and I spread them out on the floor. And I just and I literally I played sock and bop them with their fucking ass. I was literally each one of them. I, I ripped open their asshole. I spit in it and I fucked each one of them like that. They're just bent in a row. One, two, three, four.

How many people are on a pitch? Don't even know. I don't even know how many players are out there, but one after another goal, goal, nothing you could do. You started changing formations, bro. I don't know how to change formations. I'm like Beyonce. Let's get in formation. Realal. Goal. Nothing you could do. You started changing formations, bro. I don't know how to change formations. Wow. All right, Beyonce.

Let's get in formation. Real talk. Real talk. I'm not doing Beyonce type shit. All right. Are you finished? I'm not finished yet. I don't think he's finished, Mark.

I'm not finished yet. After I win an easy game, came back from one goal down, it's no big deal. What was the final? 3-2. That's all you wanted. That's all you wanted. How many goals am not supposed to go. I'm putting it on

and the internet starts to go crazy. They're like, yo, yo, you got to play it again and play it again. I'm like, for what? It makes no sense.

Because you didn't stream it. We were streaming it. We were streaming it. You only started streaming at the 80th minute. They didn't see any of the goals. They didn't see how lucky you got. Nah, they saw the goal.

They saw the goal. They saw the winning goal. There was no goals after we started streaming. Bro, it's on YouTube. Just look it up. They saw the goal. They saw the winning goal. There was no goals after we started streaming. They saw the winning goal. Bro, it's on YouTube. Let's look it up. Let's be honest.

There's a lot of people in my DMs saying that they can re-watch it. I did. I did. I looked at it. You need to re-watch it a lot. I just want to say

everybody who's DMing me, and I mean this sincerely, I'm not talking as someone who is arrogant. I'm not talking as someone who's cocky. I'm not talking as someone who is... No, he's a humble guy.

He's the most humble guy I know. I say this in the most humble way possible. I'm not talking to someone who's cocky. I'm not talking to someone who is... No, he's a humble guy. He's the most humble guy I know. I say this in the most humble way possible. I will have you on the corner selling pussy. I will have you on the corner selling pussy for $5. If you ever want to challenge me

in FIFA, I will have you on the corner selling your pussy for $5. And then I'll come collect that money and then send your ass right back out to the corner. I'm the greatest to ever do this.

Never been done like this before. It's natural. It's in me. I'm telling you the edibles hit. Something happened when I was in college and it's never been the same again. You, the person right now watching, thinking, oh, I'm going to bust his ass.

I will have you and your family on the corner selling pussy for $5. And if you're in another country, it could be euros. It could be yen it could be souvlakis i don't know what the fuck it is that's a green dish that too that's worth more than their currency you'll be selling food on the corner for five dollars it's not even about the money it's that simple i'm telling you what i do is i come in there and i fuck your team up

i fuck your team up till your mom's pussy get wet i fuck your team up till your mom's pussy get wet. Cut it. I fuck your team up till your mom's pussy get wet. I do. I fuck your team up till your mom's pussy get wet. And then what I do is I water the pitch with your mom's pussy.

I just wipe her up and down the pitch and I water that whole pitch and then we come back in. It's just like the Zamboni. I Zamboni the pitch with your mom's pussy. That's how nice I am at this fucking people.

So when I'm being... Is it like just baseball? Say what? What are we talking about here? I don't even know what's happening. mom's pussy. That's how nice I am at this fucking FIFA. So, wait, I'm being... Say what? What are we talking about here? I don't even know what's happening. The pitch is what they call the green shit where you play the soccer on the field. Oh, call it a pitch. They call it a pitch.

They call it a pitch, bro. Bro, this always happens. Anyone that actually plays FIFA will know, like, new guys will get lucky every now and again, and then they think their guys give up the FIFA. Okay. So, first off, it's legit a fluke. He's a FIFA fraud.

He doesn't actually do this. And it's offensive to anyone that actually likes FIFA that you think you're even good. This is what's going to happen. it's legit a fluke. He's a FIFA fraud. He doesn't actually do this. And it's offensive to anyone that actually likes FIFA that you think you're even good. It's legit offensive. This is what it is. Here's the metaphor for what I'm going to do to whoever plays me. This is the metaphor what I'm going to do to you. This is what I'm going to do.

I'm going to take my hands and I'm going to separate your mouth and I'm going to push my dick as far into your throat as I possibly can. How long have you played FIFA? That's what it feels like. He's like, it wasn't even that deep. It wasn't that deep. I'm not talking to Mark. I'm not talking about the other people challenging me.

I'm not going to speak crazy disrespectful to you like that. How long have you played FIFA for? Say what? You played FIFA for 10 years? Every day, five hours? And you could only beat me one time, lucky, off one goal, bro? I've only been playing for three years. He said he hadn't hadn't played in ten years. He's been playing since 2000 to 2010 He's been playing for ten years argument. You've been playing for years

This is your goal and be by one this argument when I'm saying I'm taking mom pussies and I'm dripping them all over the fuck I'm being realistic. You're just talking crazy. I'm not realistic cuz I'm not real I'm realistic because I'm not real. I'm not real. I'm not a real person on that pitch. You're fake. That's my point. I am fake. I am fake.

That's how you will describe me. That's how the people will describe me. They will deny my greatness by calling me fake. They think I'm on PEDs. They think I'm on EPO. You just said you do edibles. You are on PEDs. You're on edibles.

You're on edibles. That's PEDs. What happened? Yeah, it is what it is. Ja'Kari Richardson, bro. I'm part of it. I'm messy. You had me on HGH early on, and it grew me into the greatest player ever.

I'm fucking bebopping Rock Steady. That's who I am. I'm not playing around. And if any of you pussies want that shit, make sure your mom had a big glass of water, because she going to be dripping. You're embarrassing yourself right now. You're embarrassing yourself. What do you mean?

We already registered the esports FIFA team, flagrant. I'm being honest, dog. He doesn't really do this. It's a problem. No, no, no, no, no. He's going to embarrass all of us if he tries to play one person, bro. When it comes to FIFA, it's a problem, dude. He already embarrassed you, so what's the point?

It was literally the luckiest goal of all time. He didn't want to stream it. But he did three of them. The stream got late. But he did three of them. That's what I'm saying. Three lucky goals. Did you get your cheeks clapped or did you not get your cheeks clapped?

With all due respect, when you got off the seat, did it make a suction sound? Lucky goal. Lucky goal at the very end. Bro, you've been playing your whole life. How is it that close? I'm going to say I'm going to do it. Three lucky goals, though. Son, three lucky goals.

Come on. Three times a charm. How about you do yourself a favor? I'm lucky. Do yourself a favor. Do everyone else a favor. Set up another game. Lucky Luciano right there, son.

Set up another game. Set up another game. Call me lucky then. All right, how about this? I'm lucky. When I beat you. I'm lucky. When I beat you. You know what I'm lucky Lucky Luciano Set up another game Call me lucky then Alright how about this I'm lucky When I beat you I'm lucky When I beat you

You know what I'm saying Your mom's lucky too Your mom You're at home watching right now Thinking you could beat me She's lucky She's a lucky lady Very lucky lady

I mean that Grab your waifu Tell her to have a Big gulp of waifu Before I come play you at FIFA talking shit. I got motherfuckers. I got motherfuckers coming for me wanting to play again. You want it again?

Why don't you set it up? You're crazy. Why don't you set it up? You want it again? You're crazy. See, this is the thing. He only does things he can control. He only does things he can control.

And he knows that I'm going to wash him in the next game and he doesn't want to set it up. You know what I'm saying? He got personal knowledge. He got personal knowledge. He only does shit he can control. Why he has to get personal, bro? control and he knows that I'm going to wash him in the next game and he doesn't want to set it up. You know what I'm saying? He only does shit to keep control. I'm talking about hypothetical people's mom pussies. Let's run it back. Hypothetical people's mom pussies. My man went at you as a man. I really do this, bro.

That was disrespectful. Literally, literally, literally during that game at one point in time, your asshole whistled. Your asshole whistled. That's how deep I was getting in that ass. I literally, that game At one point in time Your asshole whistled Your asshole whistled Son That's how deep I was getting in that ass I literally

I heard a It was faint Nah real talk Mark was getting tight He was getting tight My man was furious You weren't there I wish I was there

You should have seen it Son Stop it Let's run it back When I beat you I want you to shave your legs On live Son

When I beat you I want you to shave your legs On live Cause I don't want my bitches hairy I don't want my bitches hairy That's run it back when I beat you. I want you to shave your legs on live So when I beat you on your leg That's what I'm saying like I need to save my life I don't you to shave your legs alive because I don't like my bitches Harry And if I lose I'll shave mine. Okay, I don't respect shave your head And if I lose, I'll shave mine You shave your head That's what I was going to say Put your hair on it Nah, you shave your head, pussy

Put your hair on it He's saying alright I like my bitches balls Okay, I like my bitches balls I want you to shave your head But you're halfway there right now I want you to shave your fucking head Shaved balls Easy, done Wow You're halfway there right now. You know what I'm saying? I want you to shave your fucking head.

Shaved. Balls. Bro, easy. Done. Deal? Done, bro. Wow. You a wild boy. I'm not going to lose, bro.

You can't lose. You can shave your whole head. I can't lose. Keep in mind. Keep in mind. I haven't played in a decade. You play every single week. I don't have a TV.

I legit don't have a TV, bro. I literally play every single week. You have the console at home. You brought the console. This is your console. It's your console. I don't have a TV. I literally, you play every single week. You have the console at home. You brought the console. This is your console. It's your console. I don't have a TV. It's your controller.

You gave me the shitty controller, too. I saw you switch it. Pussy. Right? Pussy. I don't even know. He probably kept the white one racist, motherfucker. Yeah, he would.

He would. So I take the trash controller. It don't matter if the keys are all sticky and all that kind of shit. Why is the black one the trash controller, bro? Nah, there was a button that was sticky. There was a button that was sticky. That's his cum control. It was a button that was sticky, son. That's his trash control. It don't matter if the keys are all sticky and all that kind of shit. Why is the black one the trash controller? Nah, there was a button that was sticky. It was a button that was sticky. But it don't matter. I didn't even use that button. I don't even need that button.

I can take less buttons, but it doesn't matter. Point is, you got your ass worked. You got your ass worked. The people saw you get your ass worked. Al saw you get your ass worked. When I said Al, please just correct me if I'm wrong, because I forgot. I be forgetting. I be forgetting.

Sometimes when you so great, you forget your greatness. I forget, because I'm pretty sure I was like, I'm going to put a goal in his pussy hole right now. And then I think immediately afterwards. You put a goal in his pussy. In his pussy hole. Son. And that shit went super easy, bro. Son just clogged up the whole uterus, everything.

Everything. It wasn't even clogged. There was mad room for other shit that I almost started putting furniture in. He still waiting for his poop to drop. He put his new couch in there. Rob Markman, the man, the man. Rob Markman, the man. Rob Markman, the man. Rob Markman, the man. Rob Markman, the man. Rob Markman, the man. Rob Markman, the man. Rob Markman, the man. Rob Markman, the man. Rob Markman, the man.

Rob Markman, the man. Rob Markman, the man. Rob Markman, the man. Rob Markman, the man. Rob Markman, the man. Rob Markman, the man. Rob Markman, the man. Rob Markman, the man.

Rob Markman, the man. Rob Markman, the man. Rob Markman, the man. Rob Markman, the man. Rob Markman, the man. Rob Markman, the man. Rob Markman, the man. Rob Markman, the man. Rob Markman, the happened? What happened? Order, order, order. No, I'm getting crazy right now. No, no, I'm about to be disrespected.

I'm about to be disrespected. That's why I'm feeling it. When I fuck people up, when I fuck people up, it's different. I leave them pussy holes gaping, and I leave them assholes gaping. You couldn't be Alex. No, bro. I don't think you could be Alex. You have some burnt lips.

You couldn't be Alex, bro. Don't put me in this. You legit couldn't be Alex. I have straight butt cheeks in this game. And I legit think he can't beat you. I'm taking my cheeks in this game. And I legit think he can't beat you. Akash taking my asshole in this game. I don't think you can beat Akash. Nah, you can take my asshole.

You couldn't beat Akash. Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh. You might be the worst in the room, legit. Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh. You got to get a victory first. Bro, I beat Alex. I didn't even know the controller. You didn't even know the controller.

Bro, I'll beat anyone. I was asking for the buttons. He ain't tell me until after half. He didn't tell me after he starts scoring. After half, when he's up three, then he's like, oh, this is how you do it. I'm like, what the fuck? Catch up. What do you want me to do?

It's unbelievable. I was really upset that I missed the whore-up. Yo, shut the fuck up. He's going to read how to win on the internet. I play video games. He's playing Mario Kart with the rest of the ladies. We talk about man shit. FIFA.

Nah, chill out. FIFA. Mario Kart is bad. I will spend money to train you, Mark. I'm going to hire you. He's going to read the hacks on the internet like he do at NBA Jam. Oh, you don't think he was reading

this whole weekend? Mark was in here in the weekend practicing. What was I doing? Setting up an apartment. I'm setting up an apartment. In Mark's pussy? In Mark's pussy? In Mark's pussy? Where are you setting that up? Camp house.

I know all you guys are not talking shit, bro. I'm not good at video games. That's my point. This kid is going to get washed of everything. Mark won a victory. Hey, Mark. I'm going to lose. See how easy that is?

Just say it. I'm going to lose. Nah, nah, nah. See? It's freeing. You'll feel the weight off your shoulders. The weight of Andrew's dick. I'm going to lose. I'm a lose.

When I play, I'm just being honest. When I play the game, I'm a different human being. Mark can't say that. He can't say he's going to lose. He's a loser. Oh. Bro, you're a loser. I mean, you.

I'm just saying. I'm a bunch of losers. That was harsh. That was harsh. I have the tournament set. We'll do it in Andrew's new mezzanine level. Shut the fuck up, dude. No, we're going to do it in Andrew's new mezzanine level. Shut the fuck up, dude. No, we're going to do it in Andrew's new mezzanine level.

That's why that bitch stood you up. You talk too much. Andrew got cucked out of his old video game room at his new place. You got cucked out of your new mezzanine level at your apartment. Yo, yo. Wait, wait, wait. Let's go, dude. Let's go, dude.

Let's go, dude. Oh, yeah, yeah. I was trying to say. There is dirt. I heard something. That FIFA should have happened on this chic Soho mezzanine level that Andrew had that he had to take a shit to earn his manhood back. Suck him into the wave pool.

Let's go, Dub. It's his girl. Suck him in. Office. He's not even in the office. She's got an office. But she just works. She works corporate.

I got bodies. She doesn't need that. I got bodies. That could have been the FIFA rule. So you no longer have a mezzanine. No. Can I be honest with you? You no longer have a mezzanine. No. Can I be honest with you? You no longer have a mezzanine.

Can I be honest with you? I don't think you're about to be. Paying for shit is overrated, man. Paying for shit is overrated because you got to keep reminding motherfuckers you pay for shit. I'll agree with you on that. If you keep paying for shit, they think this shit don't cost no money. You know what I mean?

Like, holy shit. Now, don't get me wrong. My girl set up the whole apartment. She set the whole thing up. She did all the returns and all that other kind of shit. Now, don't get me wrong. My girl set up the whole apartment. She set the whole thing up. Like, she did all the returns and all that other kind of shit. You know what I mean? But she's like, I've done so much work setting this whole place up. And I'm like, all right.

That's your part. I've been there. I've been there. That's your part. I've been there. I did work paying for this motherfucker. What do you think? We just got the money to pay for it?

Yeah. You think it just showed up in the account? Hey. We ain't going nowhere. We ain't putting no work Come on man And I trundled them a discount too They got a discount But when it comes to the mezzanine

It sounded like she went like That Can I be honest with you Can I be honest with you Can I be honest with you What I said I was doing to people on FIFA That's what happened to me I got my pussy hole split wide the fuck open

Huck Tui Huck Tui inside bro It was destroyed Put the whole mezzanine together And then she was like I got my pussy hole split wide the fuck open. Huck Tui. Huck Tui inside, bro. It was destroyed. Put the whole mezzanine together. And then she was like, this is great for my office. The second she started being like, what is that? When you take ownership with it.

My. Possessive? Possessive. Son, you done forgot the word my. There's no more my anymore. I want to describe my. Ours are yours. The second she started saying my, I was like ours or yours Yeah she was like But say she started saying my I was like

Oh it's all over Hey listen Once you engage and married Ain't no more possessions It's her possessions Yeah Worst case scenario You get half your shit back

Yeah And that's if everything Falls apart I'm looking at that shit On your wrist right now You know what it is bro You know what it is bro Hey my wrist is my mezzanine dog

No our gosh It's the mezzanine Yeah Her body her choice That's our gosh My wrist is my mezzanine. No, Akash is the mezzanine. Her body, her choice. That's Akash. That ain't what it is, bro. Damn, son.

We got body out here. I'm just spending extra time in the office. I call it the office. It's our office. It's our office. So I just be up there just for the point of it. So I just went up there to do some notes and shit. I just been up there spending time. Just doodling.

Doodling. It don't matter. Moving shit around just some notes and shit. I just made up there spending time doodling doodle It don't matter shit around just to frustrate her. Yeah, I take her books. I reorganize it in ways. She don't like the binding in first 100% I was reading so upsetting why is it whatever my ideas it sucks Why is that? Alright guys, we take a break for a second because like I you before, it's very important to me that you have a hard penis. Okay? I know that feels weird. Maybe some of you right now, you're like, I don't know if I want Schultz to want me to have a hard dick.

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You pay $5 shipping. Which seems like a bargain for the best dick of your life. Go do it right now. Use the promo code flagrant. BlueChew.com. Now let's get back to why is it whatever i suggest immediately it's like i guess immediately sucks trash i think women just love inconvenience that's what it is like i think once once my girl figured out that the couch wasn't

gonna fit up the stairs she wanted it more oh yeah yeah yeah oh yeah what's the couch so delightful so first off we go to fucking Restoration hardware outlet This is before or after You got your ass Fucked in people Oh this is after You got your ass Oh my god dude

We don't need that Bad weekend Bad weekend Bad weekend Bad weekend Gaping hole Yeah You went for some

Retail therapy Yeah exactly And I was like Yo I'm gonna get Control of my life back Alright At the restoration Hardware outlet

And then we go in And we're looking At this couch And she's like Yeah it's fine Whatever And then we talk To the guy

He goes alright Sales are final What is it It's just like leather couch i don't know but what type saturation hardware is the nice shit son oh shit so this shit was all scuffed up on the back and you're putting it back to the wall yeah exactly how much is it normal price i think it was like 10 8 or some restoration hardware was good but this whole thing's a hustle first off furniture is a hustle i was looking it up on like reddit and Reddit and shit. They make it in China for like $100. I wanted to get a Chinese couch if I could, but that's not how it works. Well, you did.

Yeah, basically. You just paid not Chinese. I didn't know they had outlets on. I'm going to hit you up for that. What's that, the outlet? Yeah. By the outlet's fire. I wish I knew that.

Your face, that shit just hitting you right now when he told me that shit I was so furious bro I was so upset I knew he would find a way I knew he would fucking find a way so we show up it's a fucking four story walk up

with the tightest staircase stairwell ever and the guy's like alright yeah it's this many inches long. You have to go back and check the stairwell, then come back and buy it in person. So we're going back and forth four times. Your building don't got an elevator? No.

That's what I'm saying. It's four stories. I'm talking about outdoor space. Don't got a fucking elevator. Get the fuck out of here. Get the fuck out of here. You need the outdoor space. I wonder why you got a fat ass on that walking up.

I do a stair climber every day. Stair climber. Non-stop. I take him two at a time. It doesn't take as long. It's only a two story walk. Okay. Go on.

Go on. So we get there the next day. They drop off the couch and he's like, all right. Yeah. We're just dropping it off. No carry up. Nothing like that. Why don't you do white glove?

What is that? They got to do everything. Hey, it's worth the $50 or whatever. This is how stupid I am. dropping it off, no carry up, nothing like that. Why don't you do white glove? What is that? They do everything, bro. Hey, it's worth the $50 or whatever the fuck it is. This is how stupid I am, though. I ain't know that option either. This is how stupid, though, is that I look at the overall price, and then I'm like, all right, I'll save money on the move. You're a retard, bro.

Yeah, you're dumb. Yeah, you're dumb for that. What? No, you're dumb for that one. Because I'm realizing I'm getting fucked over on the whole thing. Can I tell you something, Mark? Can I be honest with you? Please be honest with me.

And I mean this after having 37 years of life. This is true. There's no saving money with these women, bro. No, bro. It's over. There's no saving money, bro. Because wherever you save money, it's going to cost you more the other way. 100%.

There's no saving money. I love Mary's show. There's no saving money, bro. There's no saving money, bro. I'm telling you, bro. There's no saving money. Even when you have a day that you're going to save some money, you're not going to save some money.

No, they'll find a way. They know. They will find a way. They know. They have a sense somehow. There's no saving money. Even when you have a day that you're going to save some money, you're not going to save some money. No, they'll find a way. They know. They will find a way. They know. They have a sense somehow. 100%. 100%. Go.

So we're up there. We're measuring. I'm like, look, honestly, babe, I don't think this is fitting. There's no way it's going to fit. And she's like, well, you know, it's fine. We can find another couch at some other place. Maybe an Ikea couch. And I was like, really?

Dream girl. Don't do this. Don't do this, though. But no, because I feel like she's getting me into it. She's disappointed. And then finally. No one's disappointed. Yeah, so I'm going to disappoint her.

She knows I'm a people pleaser. So I'm like, all right, fine. We're going to get the couch. And she's like, all right, but don't hold it against me if it doesn't fit. And I was like, well, that's the whole point. Well done, dog. I was like, that's the whole point. She a crafty one.

I know she is. And she was like, all right, so we're in this together, right? Like, it's not my couch. It's not your couch. It's our couch together, you and me. And I was like, well, is my car paying for it? And then we get the couch. We show up, invite all our CrossFit friends over.

They all come over, which is actually a good group of friends to have if you're trying to carry heavy shit. And then we carry it up one flight of stairs. It's so close to not fitting. It's like an inch clearance on either side. And the staircase is getting more narrow as the higher you go. So I'm like, it's just not going to go. So we get to the second floor and we're pushing it and we're like squeezing it trying to make it go and then it punctures

probably a two-foot hole in the wall fire like punches in basically through the drywall like protruding almost through the wall on the other side cheap ass walls yeah legit i'm assuming there was a hole already there hey real talk they didn't fuck up the couch though they have like a little covering the couch is probably the couch is a little covering. The couch is fucked. Everything's fucked. You should have just fucked up every wall on the way up. That's not your apartment.

Watch, watch. It gets better. Did it go into someone's apartment? Pretty much. Like not all the way, but like I think it was bulging. I think there's like some stranger things bulging.

I love living in Brooklyn. I don't know. I know, right? Fucking paper mache, rice paper walls. Some poor woman comes out. She's like, hey, what are you guys doing? We're like, oh, just carrying a couch. And she's like trying to do small talk while we're comes out she's like hey what are you guys

doing we're like i just carrying a couch and she's like trying to do small talk while we're there she's like you guys moving in i'm like yeah dude no we're not moving in we're not moving into the building with this giant fucking couch that we just sent through your wall yeah go on yeah and then we get to the top it doesn't fit we carry it back down no the same way we can't afford that no we got to the third and had to carry it all the way back down the same way so far we've been doing this for an hour and a half we've been moving this fucking couch oh my god like i feel like overpaid for it i'm just so pissed off about and then we get downstairs and we call the guy he's like oh yeah i'll chop it up for you tomorrow so the guy's gonna come today cut up the couch into like 50 pieces and then carry it upstairs

and reassemble it yeah and it's gonna look like a frankenstein with like cuts in it. No, it won't. I don't know how they do it. I don't think it's possible. No, they do. They just go through and through a seam. I'm 100% sure, right? Bro, don't you guys have hoisting companies in New York? I'm not hoisting a couch, though. What is this?

No, no, no, no. You can do that, but not in your window size. Probably not. You can't fit it into the window. I don't know. Show us the window size, but I would just say we would check that. I'm bad at measuring, as we can see. Plus, you got to take out the air vents, because the place ain't got no AC. Wait, wait. You know what I mean? The window Show us the window size. But I would just... I'm bad at measuring, as we can see. Plus, you got to take out the air vents because the place ain't got no AC.

You know what I mean? The window unit got to come down. Carl, do you have a terrace? Yeah. You have a terrace. But it's all the way up, but the back is... Yeah. So the hoist goes to the terrace, and the couch goes through the door from the terrace.

We're not hoisting the couch, bro. We're not hoisting the couch. That makes a lot of sense. It might be cheaper than cutting up your couch in a bunch of pieces. That makes a lot of sense. The hoist... We cutting up your couch. That makes a lot of sense. The hoist, we can't do a hoist. I'm gone for one week, and this happens, Mark? You can do a hoist.

No, I get to a hoist. No, no, no. I get to a hoist. The idea of cutting up the couch came from that guy. How did you know that? Why? Because he told us. So you're the idiot.

I didn't know you wanted a hoist. If you want a hoist, I can get you a hoist. Wait, that was your idea to cut it up? Yeah, but you didn't ask me about hoisting. Why would you listen to him on any of this shit? I understand. I understand the city. Sometimes you need to cut up a couch.

You want to have a good couch? They gave grand pianos through windows in this fucking city for 100 years. No, you cut up a grand piano. I'll cut up a grand piano right now. I can get a grand piano cut up for you by three o'clock. By three o'clock, I have a whole grand piano cut up for you. Easily. Would you put it back together? Have you guys seen Big Lebowski?

Yes. That's, uh, what is the guy's name? The fat motherfucker? Donnie? I can get you a gun. I'll get you a gun. Shut the fuck up, Donnie! It's the guy who says, shut the fuck up, Donnie. Okay, so what ends up happening? He's up.

Whenever you got something you got to figure out, you just call him up. All he did was, I was in Italy, he's sending me a picture of this couch. What do you think of this couch? I was like, it's nice. It's pretty deep. I literally said it. Mark, you have to understand. You live in a Hasidic Jewish neighborhood, right?

Yeah. People are known for having massive families. You don't think they can get a big couch into a small fucking building? Of course, there's different ways to do it. I think there's all the little kids, they carry the shit up, they have small hands. It doesn't matter about carrying it up, there's no room to get it in. There's gotta be other ways to get it in. So what you do is you get a sectional.

Ain't hoisting all you do in CrossFit, ain't that every move in CrossFit is hoisting some shit? I know. Think of this, y'all could probably just hoist it up to the fourth floor yourself. Just launch it? Yeah. Honestly, you get a bunch of Hasidic Jews, and you put a Jew on it it and you pretend it's a bar mitzvah and they will have that shit. They will just... We carry it with us.

Yo, it's a wedding. Just put them on the chair. Four or five of them and stack them up on their shoulders. Yeah. Robbie Slovic, that motherfucker. Fuck, dog. So it's a wrap, huh?

Yeah, it's a wrap. It's just sitting in our lobby on the side with a giant All Sales or Finals sticker on it. They know it doesn't fit anywhere. So yeah, this is my life. Did you put a note to not move it? Let me see a picture of this couch. Maybe I'll take it off your hands.

Maybe I'll touch it. Especially New York motherfuckers just think that shit is fatiguing. Growing up sucks. The influence of disappointment. Like, if you're a girlfriend listening right now, you're a wife, whatever now your wife whatever like that you can play that disappointment card and it's very effective oh it's the most effective but you can't play too much because then we build resentment so if you're disappointed just enough

when you need something we'll go do it if you're always disappointed now all of a sudden we get used to it and then we're just like oh you're just a fucking bitch cheating on you and then have a whole other family on the side and then you just get left with nothing but if you if you if you have enough disappointment every once in a while about some things simple as that like i'm already roped into i already know there's no disappointment here but like i already understand how i spiral like we're trying to figure out a place for honeymoon right yeah so but. So, but it's winter, right? And we don't want to go somewhere cold for honeymoon. You want to just like fucking relax, right?

So, we're like the place that we actually want to go might be somewhere in Europe. So, I'm like, all right, why don't we just wait till summer? And she's like, okay, but should we just go somewhere like just for a couple days after the wedding? She's nice. So, I'm like, so I go, I go i know yeah it'd be nice to just go somewhere for a couple of your days it's not a big deal like we'll go up to like wine country or something like that you're like yeah i've done that a lot you know i come from that area and i come like all right maybe we'll go somewhere else right you feel the tides turning yeah yeah once in my mind

it gets set that we're gonna go somewhere it's over do you know what i'm saying like like once i go like so now we're having two honeymoons yeah all right and this one the stupid one is probably gonna be crazier than the first one other than the second one that we're supposed to have in the summer what the fuck is that that happens like this happens all the time we're in the fucking container store and they show me like the cheapest version of the build out right and then right across the closet say what we just had a closet build exactly right so right across from it is like the little bit more expensive version, right?

And I'm looking at this one. This one's fine, but I'm like, what's going on over here? Like, what's this thing about over here? Because you've committed to paying already.

So at that point, it's like when you go to McDonald's and it's a little bit more for the large, and you're like, but it's so much better. It's so much more. This closet's so much nicer.

It's not more, but it's nicer. So it's like, ah, let's just do it. You're not looking at the overall cost. You're looking at the proportional jump up.

It's like, only $400 dollars more i guess a way nicer thing what's the difference between four thousand and four thousand five hundred i'm not saying that's how much it was but four thousand four thousand five hundred now i'm only i already spent the four thousand yeah the four thousand is gone yeah so i'm now i'm like well it's five hundred that's how they fucking get and then the first one's overpriced anyway so you're like all right that's four thousand this one's way nicer yeah it's 4500 that's a deal compared to the first one if we're gonna do it let's do it to your apartment but how because i remember you initially want to pay like nothing oh yeah just fucking pay it yeah and then he did that with me too i know but two months later he came up with like double

the price double the price rent and you were doing something crazy. You signed off on the crazy place. It is what it is, Brad. It is what it is. But that's the thing. It's mutually assured destruction. Why do we take financial advice? We're all fucked. Okay, we're all fucked.

Every time I walk into my new apartment, I'm like, why did I do this to me? Why did I do this to me? I love hearing that. What is going on right now? What is happening? You ever have that? Like, who's in charge here?

Who's in charge of my life? I don't know. But sometimes I don't think it's me. I don't know. No, we're not, dude. You just you just float. Guys, go sign up for the Patreon immediately, please. OK, we've got some expensive apartments we need to pay for.

Patreon dot com slash flagrant to how fucking funny would that be? How fucking funny would that be if? If we just got literally everybody that listens to this podcast to sign up on the Patreon. It was almost like a reverse troll. We're like, they just want us to compete to like waste money. That'd be fun. It's just $5 for you guys. But to us, it's a lifestyle.

Yeah. Oh, that's great. Should we do it? I'm in. A little content challenge? I'll do you guys. Yes. Okay.

Guys, what's going on? Should we talk about some things today is there anything in an hour and 15 minutes let's have some conversation okay what do we have to do what do we have to do what do we have to do uh some olympic stuff did we talk about it yeah america's still losing in the medal count well not really because i'm i'm not counting certain things so like uh the italian that won the 100 meter dash was born in america he's american his name is lamont like that's as american as you get his dad's black american dude that's for example yes come on so why are you running for america because i'm 100 italian whatever fucking cock shit it is but you're american dog i'm sorry you're american we won that medal you can give it to people in italy but you

know you're born in el Paso. Your dad's black American. It's a one-day rule. I don't think you got your speed from your Italian mom. I'm pretty sure we know where the speed came from. Oh, yeah. Yes or no? Yeah. I don't get it, though. His father is a soldier who was stationed in Italy.

They moved there when he was very young. He grew up properly Italian. What age? Pardon? What age did he move to? I don't care. You were born in America. You're American.

Little kid. You're born in America. You're American. Or if you move here and you compete for us, then you're also American. It's a one-drop rule, but for days. Exactly. One day. Especially for important races like the 100-meter dash.

That's ours. Your American side won it. Let's just be honest here. Your American side won it, okay? Right. When the Indian kids win the spelling bee, we know who won it. Yeah. It's India.

Yeah, they may be from America, but we know who won it. It's the Indian side. Right? They're spelling the American words, but still. But if you count that, then America loses some medals other places. Well, we have to decide that. Go. Like Suni Lee won mad golds for America.

Her family's from Minnesotanesota but they originate from somewhere else i don't know where she's mung oh really she's mung yes so she's originally from laos i believe right and the mung people they're like this ethnic group they exist in that part of asia and um they uh we basically brought them all over here because they sided with us in the vietnam war that girl made the v War worth it, if you ask me. 100%. We now won the Vietnam War. We now won the Vietnam War.

We took your best gymnast. You could have won the gold medal out there in Vietnam, but you wanted to pop off with that communism shit. So we had to yank that talent out of here. And now here we are, gold medals. But yeah, so the Hmong people, a lot of them I think are in Minnesota. I think that's where the largest Hmong population. I think when we were in Sacramento, there was a Hmong person in the audience. Yeah, yeah.

But she won for America. But by your standard, wouldn't she have then won that not for America? No, because if you move here and you're good, then you're American. But was she born here? If you're born here, you're American. Or if you move here and you're good, you're American. Those are the rules. Okay, I like those rules.

If you move here last week yeah and you win a race this week for america yeah you're american but the italian guy he's american anything that benefits us we win yeah oh you said you said i'm saying were you looking for like a through line of logic i don't want to lose american medals no no all the medals count also if it's an american sport another country wins we win oh. Oh, I like that. 100%. Skateboarding, all that shit, we win. That's our message. Oh, so we're winning the medal count.

We will always win the Olympics. Oh, sick. The Olympics is an American sport. That's an American activity. Okay? That's just what it is. And we have to accept it for that. All right? What are you looking up, Al?

I don't know. I just wanted to actually see the medal count. But what is it? Is it that bad? All right. So China's got 29 golds. Okay. United States has 22 golds. I just wanted to actually see the medal count. But what is it? Is it that bad? All right. So China's got 29 golds. United States has 22 golds. I don't like that at all.

We're still winning the overall. We got 64 overall medals. And we're getting into track and field like this is our shit. Right? There's no Shaqari. Is it? I think it's Jamaica shit. I think it is.

I mean, we lost 100 meter to an Italian. He's American, dude. But American kid got second. Say again? American's American, dude. But American kid got second. Say again? American kid got second. Yeah, American kid got second, and an American should have won. Where were the Jamaicans? I mean, that's just devastating, dude.

Yeah, well, they were winning all the women's ones. They had the men run for the women? I don't know. But they killed it, though. All three of them got first. But usually, they bust that ass. Yeah. Anyway, so America, we need to really fucking step it up, dude.

I mean this. Track and field, I think the swimming, we should be getting some medals in swimming. Swimming, I assume. I saw one of these dudes, Caleb something.

Beast. Dressel. Beast. Dressler. Do you think there's a direct connection in the Paralympics between the countries

that we bomb and how good they are at those sports? Like, it sounds really fucked up, but like... Let's go through the list. Japan? No, no, no. Now we're talking about

recently. The Middle East are not killing it. I'm just asking. We're spitballing. Would those be American medals then? They should be American medals. That's all I'm trying to say. American medals.

Is the para going on right now? No. It happens right after? No. Is that again? It happens right after the Olympics. I mean, it should only be the Paralympics. Yeah. Or a week after, yeah. Oh, so this is just to open an act. They're the headlines. Pretty much.

Yes, yes, yes. Okay, a couple things that are interesting about the Olympics. The trans athlete from New Zealand, the weightlifter, lost. Yeah, got that. Which proves, I believe this was Mark's point, that she was an industry plant. She's a progressive industry plant. She was put there knowing she'd lose to normalize trans athletes. The biggest issue with the normalization of trans athletes is they're so much better at least for the men

that are transitioning into women they're so much better how could you possibly let them compete they're just gonna destroy these chicks in every event this girl goes to compete in the powerlifting this girl I'll put in quotes goes to compete in the powerlifting loses right and now the trans community gets to say hey see

we're losers we're losers real talk though isn't that interesting yeah so do you think that was the point i don't know like i floated that idea before but i don't know necessarily because well one if the testosterone levels are lower i think that does actually affect your ability to lift weights okay yeah and then so that's like for like oh no it was just uh she just lost but the other side is i don't know enough about weightlifting but what i was reading is that like she did the same

lift like the same amount of weight three times in a row so you get three lifts and they like aggregate your weight or whatever and so normally you would do like i think the the weight to beat was like 128 yeah 128 kilograms for like the snatch or whatever i have a note but go on and she and like the girl that one did like 120 125 128 and that's like a normal progression for that kind of thing right and this girl just did 125 125 125 and then didn't contest the one where she actually got it over so she actually got the weight up at 125 on one of the lifts but they disqualified the lift because they said it was like two movements or something it's like a technical weightlifting thing that disqualified that specific lift and you're allowed to like appeal one of them so there's like some strategy to it but they didn't

appeal that one so some people for the side of like oh they just threw it were basically saying like she went in intentionally did three lifts that were like crazy high for her PR and didn't try to like get anything on the scoreboard initially. Cause normally you would just try to get one lift, get it on the board. That way you have points, but they intentionally didn't do that. And then just bowed out that way. That's industry plan. Yeah. That's supposed to lose. Of course. That's what this whole thing is about. I don't know enough about weightlifting to know, like, if that's a strategy, you need to know lifting. What are you talking about? Strategy? Did you get it up? You got it up?

Was it more than the last person? You move on. Simple as that, right? Of course. She did a weight that she can't do and then it failed and then now we get to say, oh, let's be progressive and let men compete against women, which defeats the entire purpose of the Olympics having different categories for men and women.

It's just ridiculous. I mean, whatever. Dude, let's make it all one category it's like how many times are we gonna say this and people are still gonna argue they're still gonna argue forever they don't want they you can't allow logic into it dude it's like fucking ufos that's the new thing trans is just gonna become ufos they're gonna keep on like they're gonna keep on giving us information about like how it's true and how it's real and then eventually we're just gonna be so like bogged down with all the information and be like i don't care yeah it's just like if you have if ufos come now like how many different versions of like a blurry

image of a ufo have we seen how many different like navy pilots have said oh yeah i saw ufo and we're like all right cool thanks i'm moving on moving along what'd the baby say like we care more about the baby's comments than ufos it's gonna take them landing aliens landing on earth and doing some talking about trance they might have to compete yeah and say what aliens might have to like compete in like a sport or something for us to give a fuck they're gonna have to do something yeah and i don't think that they'll be that strong why not i think if you're smart enough like the smarter we get the weaker we get right so i think like you know back in the like the smarter we get, the weaker we get. Right. So I think like, you know, back in the day,

we were probably way stronger than we are now. Right. And I'm not talking about like the Thor's right on average, like, yeah, the average person, right. Because as our cognitive ability is more,

uh, powerful and productive, we can like develop machines and stuff to do the things that we would have to do with our hands back in the day. Right. And then the people who are just like hulking masses, uh, aren't going to be able to reproduce as easy as the smart people who will be

more, maybe financially successful and they'll want to share their offspring. Right. So we're like rewarding intelligence over body size. So if you're smart enough, you're an alien life form, you're smart enough to get from another fucking galaxy to here. Why the hell do you need biceps or abs or traps?

Like if you're that smart, you just invent some shit to lift it. You got robots, you got all these other things and less gravity. Well, if you're that smart, you just invent some shit to lift it. You got robots. You got all these other things. And less gravity. Well, they might have more gravity. But space, you're bouncing around. But on your planet.

Might be less gravity. But I don't know about that. Because as we've gotten smarter, we've known how to manipulate our bodies to get bigger. And if they have any sports in alien planets, they're probably fucking huge. That's true. That's fucking huge. That's true. That's a true. That's a good point. Or you can just come up with something that makes you look the way you need to look for whatever reason.

Or you eventually make esports the most popular thing in the world because everybody can compete at it. And I think that's kind of what's happening now. Don't dare call that a sport. Bro, I know it's crazy to say, but I think in 50 years... Unless it's FIFA. I think in 50 years it'll just be esports and then and we're just gonna look at these people now we're gonna look at these people who are like running and doing gymnastics we're like what are you retarded like why would you do that you ever look at some of these things like the fucking uh the hammer throw like these people

dedicate their whole life to spinning in a circle three times and throwing something. Yeah, but think how long we've looked at it like that. Our whole lives we've looked at that. Like, what the fuck is that? There was never a time in our 37 years where we've looked at hammer throwing

and been like, nah, that's a sport. It's always been dumb as fuck. Basketball's always been a sport. Weightlifting, kind of a sport. Anything that's physical exercise that gets you in shape, all right, cool, that's a sport.

When you look at these hammer throwers and you're like, that bitch built horribly. That's not a sport. When you look at these hammer throwers and you're like, that bitch built horribly. That's not a sport. That's why I'm pissed they took wrestling out. Why'd they take wrestling out? To me, that's like the most pure sport. Why'd they take it out? I don't know. I thought I saw motherfuckers wrestling on TV.

Oh, maybe. Oh, fuck. I thought they took it out of the Olympics. I don't know. Am I wrong? But wrestling is one of the oldest Olympic sports. I don't think they should do that just for legacy. I don't care if nobody's into it. Not to mention actual stars come out of wrestling. Like, stars that go, Kurt Angle went to the WWE. He apparently won the gold with a broken neck, he was saying.

You saw his PM post that on Instagram? Yeah. Just intentionally trying to get people fired up? They were going for it, big time. Kurt Angle competed in the 1984 Olympics or some shit with a broken neck yeah and won gold in wrestling and then they shared that like the same day that Simone Biles pulled out oh no

it wasn't the same it was like a day after like congrats to Kurt Angle on this day in 1984 won with a broken neck and then all the people in comments are like why are you doing this getting people fired up she's speaking about Simone she's coming back yeah she's to do the beam which is interesting what do you think about that Al?

I don't really know so she said she has the twisties and all the gymnasts are like oh fuck it's serious what is it? it's almost like when you're in a slump in baseball so it's not that you're not good anymore it's just you're so in your head

that all your talent is just gone they talk about in golf where you could be as fucked so it's like it's not that you're not good anymore it's just you're so in your head that like all your talent is just like gone yeah it's like the yips they talk about in golf where you could be the twisties i guess from what i was trying to read you don't know like where your body's not doing what you want it to mentally in midair at the peak of the jump so you could get seriously injured and i think it does make sense that she landed off that one horribly and then she just looked shaken up and then just got the fuck, just walked off. I think she was like, dude, I think I might have almost just died right there. My body wasn't doing what I wanted to.

Terrifying. Yeah, I don't know if it goes away that quickly, though. I'm worried for her. That's the thing. I learned a little bit more about this. So basically, during qualifying, she was having issues. She wasn't performing at her best. I saw the early part.

That didn't just happen. Interesting. And leading up to qualifying, she was like, I just can't wait for the Olympics to be over because I want to retire. Yeah, I remember she said that. She was checked out of it. She's been checked out, B. Yeah.

So now it's like, I get it now. And so that, the thing, what you said, this, what's it called? Skips or? Yep. Twisties. Twisties. So it's like you lose your um you lose where you are in the air and so she's been gifted to have that ability since she was six her very first like

flip she just knew how to do it and they were like this is crazy like no kid has this ability at this young so she's always been that good and it just came to her so now to not have it not have it this is the first time dealing with that it's like she said it's happened before and it's been a one to two week period where it where it took to get it away yeah another thing that's worth noting with this shit is like it is objectively more dangerous than other sports right oh so much more yeah like whenever people compare it to like oh well you know this track star ran with a hurt ankle it's like yeah that's tough but it's different when you're flying in the air yeah instead of a hurdle you have to fucking somersault over the hurdle every time yeah yeah there's not a ton of people that have been paralyzed coming around with her too i think

there's a lot of disappointment initially and i think people are just kind of coming around i think that that uh other girl suny lee winning the all around yeah that helped a lot i think that helped and like the team still being pretty successful i mean i guess they lost the team gold but they got like silver like the team doing okay yeah eas. I mean, I guess they lost the team gold, but they got like silver. Like the team doing okay eased a lot of people's tensions because it was never really about Simone Biles, right? It was your selfish yearning to win gold in the Olympics and be better than all these other countries.

So yeah, I think that that calmed the down go. What Al was saying adds up with what we were saying last week though, which is she already was kind of ready to retire. She was kind of done with it. Then you got these twisty things and you're like, i could die on any jump and i don't even want to be here yeah i'm done i'm actually yeah i don't know why she's competing in this unless this shit is gone i think it's kind of cool if she wins this then she gets to go out as you leave yeah and then with the beam i guess high risk maybe they just realize oh it's not as dangerous as

like flipping through the air like doing like the vault or whatever like with beam like if you fall off you just fall on the ground or like yeah there's something to catch you she might be they might be able to evaluate the risk and realize it's not as risky yeah yeah or maybe she's just really confident in that one thing so well i'm surprised that she didn't want to do the floor because the floor to me is the one that seems the least risky and that's where she has her move that no one else can do. It's on the floor. It's called the bile. I saw her during the warm-up or whatever, like the qualifying thing.

But you could honestly see, you were like, oh, I didn't know if it was a mental thing or what. But she doesn't look like she's, like even the commentators, she doesn't look like she normally looks. She's still the best, but she doesn't look like she normally looks. I feel bad. Did we ever talk about the scoring thing with her yeah yeah like how uh they didn't adjust it yeah yeah yeah and do you think that's part of the reason why she wanted to the floor where she's like i'm gonna get fucked on the scoring anyway or like i can't even can't even do the shit i want to do i'm

already pissed about this specific event maybe maybe i mean i thought was really interesting was the uh this little conspiracy theory going around that like the Adderall, not being able to get Adderall. Oh, I heard that. Yeah. Was it an issue? You heard about this? I didn't hear this. So I guess Adderall is illegal in Japan.

Yeah. Okay. So not that it's illegal for Olympic competition, but I think it's just illegal in Japan. Okay. So some people are saying she wasn't able to be on Adderall, and that was causing the twisties or whatever. Apparently she's had ADHD since she was a kid. Some people say that that's

like a... I mean, Adderall's amazing. Yeah, I've heard. I know we all know it allows singular focus on a... Also, it is on the banned substance list for the Olympics. Oh, it is? Yeah, according to this article. If she's been prescribed it... It's Japan's banned substance, but not the Olympic.

That's what I heard. Yeah. This ABC News headline just says, ADHD meds among common drugs banned from Olympics. I can believe that. It's banned from the Olympics. Because of Japanese laws? Because it's in Japan.

I think not Olympic law. Oh. Go. Oh, I would also think maybe if she's had the prescription since she was a child, it's like you can go back and make an exception. Well, if it was banned from the Olympics, then it's null and void, right?

Because she's competed once without it before, so it doesn't matter. But my understanding was it was specifically in Japan. And what? No, because the story came up in 2016 also. It was like a big story in 2016. And she couldn't take it? She couldn't get it then also.

That's when a lot of these articles about the ADHD meds with Simone Biles came out. But maybe it's both. I don't know. If you already competed and it worked out fine, then that's just a bullshit conspiracy theory. Which to her credit, she's not saying. We haven't heard that from her. I saw one thing in the Olympics that I thought was quite interesting and kind of like indicative of

super cuck culture that's going on right now, but I'm curious your guys' perspective. The high jump, you guys are familiar with this event, the high jump. It's where they kind of do almost a backflip over the bar. I saw this. There's two

competitors, a guy from Italy and a guy from Qatar. They've been competing, I think it was like two hours or something like this at this point in time. They both do the same height. And then they both miss the height after that. And the judge comes up to them and he goes, you guys can do a jump off. Well, I guess you guys keep jumping until one misses.

Or you got, and then the Qatari guy goes, can we share goals? And then the ref goes, if he wants to. And then they look at each other and I think they were training partners. So they had like a relationship. And the Italian guy goes, yes, and just jumps and embraces the Qatari guy. And then both of them go and they're sharing the gold medal. What do you guys think about that? Weirdly, I wasn't as upset. Initially, I hated it. And then when you said they trained together and they? Weirdly, I wasn't as upset. Initially, I hated it. And then when you said they trained together and they're homies, I'm not as bothered. But I still, you just fucking win, man.

Just go win. Be a winner. You know what's interesting? Does that count as two goals? I think it counts as two goals. Just two goals and a bronze? I guess so. But what's interesting about it is, okay, from like a financial standpoint, they both know that like being a gold medalist is so much more lucrative you go back to your country there's not that many

golds from guitar i can imagine 100 right at least ones they didn't buy i think remember they were like buying weightlifters or something like that like they would get all these like uh georgian from the country of georgia like guys to just like go and get citizenship immediately and all of a sudden they're doing that for the world cup that's going to be out there they've been doing for years so uh so yeah so essentially what i thought was interesting about this and why i understood it a little bit more is in high jump you're competing with the bar not really competing against a person right it's not wrestling or yes wrestling that kind of stuff like if both you look like should we both share the goal it's like no no every day you're training

to beat the person across from you and ping pong you beat the person across from you and fencing you beat the person across from it's like your mind is geared towards domination whereas high jump you don't even need the other person to be there or not like you could just show up at four o'clock and then try to beat the number and then you beat it sure if you don't like you're really not competing against another person you're competing for this this specific height that you're trying to jump to so i do understand why they have a different camaraderie than other sports like a tennis for example where it's like i am trying to break you. I want to break your will. And I want to use mental tactics.

I'll use anything I can to break you down because you're returning something at me that I have to do. So usually at first, my initial reaction, I'm like, oh, this is some bitch shit. I mean, you're at the Olympics. Shouldn't you want to fucking go for victory, go for gold? And then I was like, in a weird way, like, I'm like, financially, they're both going to do so much fucking better.

I kind of get it. I'm a bitch for understanding it. I agree with financial, but here's where I push back on that take. He just said, yeah. Here's where I push back on that part about competing. Maybe the greatest winner we've ever had in sports is Tiger Woods. Yeah. And he never competed against anybody one-on-one after a tournament. It's golf. I go,

you go. I'm going to fucking crush you. Anytime it matters, I'm going to win. Everybody in the fucking field needs to know this. So that's where I push back because golf is, we might not even really call it a sport, but it's the same thing. It's just you and the club and that's it. Who has the best score?

Question. If there's a you and the club, and that's it. Who has the best score? Question. Yeah, I just don't consider golf a sport. If there's a tie at the end of golf, is there a penalty golf ball? No, you keep going. You have like sudden death or whatever. You do one more hole, and then whoever does better on that hole, one, two more holes, whatever it is, they have a winner, especially like tournament grand slams.

You're not doing majors. That's a sport. There's no tie for first. If a tie, and then you just got to do a guessing game on kicks to end the game, yeah, that's not really a sport doing majors that's a sport there's no tie for like if a tie and then you just gotta like do a guessing game on kicks to end the game yeah that's that that's not really a sport but golf's a sport i can see that as well a guessing game on kicks yeah that's how soccer is yeah it really is yeah it's a good point all right fair enough but um but it is hey that's my homie and we're both gonna make a lot of money or we could go back and live in fucking wherever we're gonna live and struggle for the rest of our lives if we both get gold that's my homie, and we're both going to make a lot of money, or we could go back and live in fucking wherever we're going to live

and struggle for the rest of our lives. If we both get gold, that's great. And also the game is not how many times you can jump this high. The game is how high you can jump. If you both can reach a certain height, and that's as high as you both can get, I understand it, right? Like, endurance doesn't really play much into high jump right it's not really mental exactly or or physical in terms of your endurance like it's

not like hey we're gonna keep doing this until somebody's leg gives out no it's how high can you get oh you got nine feet or whatever it is i got nine feet i know i've never done better than nine feet you know you've never done better than nine feet. You know you've never done better than nine feet. We both delivered our best jump on the day. Yeah, I don't really blame the athletes. Because in my mind, I'm like, their job is to get gold. And they were basically given a deal where they could get gold. So they kind of did what they were supposed to do. I'm more suspect of the Olympic Committee that's like,

yeah, we'll just give multiple golds out to whoever wants it. Interesting. So to me, I think the fault falls on the Olympic Committee for devaluing the price of their own goals. By being like, yeah, if you guys agree, if you guys can... There is slight tuckiness to the competitiveness, because I guarantee you, if we were trying to touch an awning, you want to get higher than

your homies. There's not like, oh, we got the same height. Great. Nah, fuck that. Raise it up. Get a higher awning. Whatever. Yeah, why do they make it jumping backwards over and just make it touch an awning? Like, that's the most relatable. That should be the Olympic sport, touch an awning. Like, everybody does that.

That's the Olympic sport in New York. Yes. Touch an awning. I got that shit off of two legs or one. Like, that's always the conversation. Off of two, you can do it off the vert. Don't step into it. Do it off the vert.

That's true. Like, that is a way more relatable sport. Jump high. Can you jump high? good hit it like the combine it's the combine backwards jumping shit long arms play in a lot

that's another thing long arms make up for the fact that you might not be able to come back that's your body that's the advantage I put it on the Olympic committee I don't really put it on the athletes so much because I get their position but it's the Olympics but yeah i put it on the olympic committee i don't really put on the athletes so much because i get their position like but it's the olympics job to push the athletes and be like nah we're going until someone wins and then that's where the athlete's gotta be like all right i gotta push through yeah yeah yeah all right guys we're gonna take

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And we're back. The baby's apologizing. Yeah. He's apologizing. DaBaby's apologizing. Yeah. He's apologizing. DaBaby's bending over. DaBaby is bending over. You know what's really funny, though? This is what I don't understand.

Why motherfuckers won't just apologize? It's like you lie to secure the bag. Let's say you come from a world where you're a hustler, right? You lie to secure the bag. The cops go, yo, you selling drugs? You go, no. You don't stand on it. Yes, I'm a drug dealer.

I'm a drug salesman. I sell drugs to make tons of money. Ten toes down. Exactly. You lie to secure the bag, right? So the reason why he got fucked up is because he doubled down. If he said that shit and then came out immediately, he was just like, yo, I was just trying to hype up the audience.

I said some dumb shit. Like, now that you guys pointed out, it absolutely ridiculous my bad i fucked up i was drunk on stage or some shit i was drunk like i was getting charged up i literally just wanted them to bring their lights up i don't know what the fuck i was saying like i was just trying to say things i thought people would absolutely agree with so they put the lights on and we could really charge up the show but thank you guys for pointing me out that shit was stupid let me go back to making my music, right? If you said that, nobody gives a flying fuck about it, right?

But because it became a thing where you get to showcase your support for a specific community that is oppressed, everybody and their mother got to come out the woodwork for it, right? And then once the people come out the woodwork, once Elton John, Madonna, and all these people start commenting,

the organizations that are putting on these festivals, they have to take you off come out the war work once elton john madonna and all these people start commenting the the organizations that are putting on these festivals they have to take you off because if you don't condemn you support in the eyes of the public and even if you don't support please believe elton john madonna and these other motherfuckers they're trying to get some clout off the situation are going to come out and go uh hey why are you supporting this person who's homophobic? Yeah. And if they don't say something, the gays that have supported them for so long

are going to come at them and go, so we support you and then you're just silent when we need you the most? So like everybody is fighting for their own reputation or fighting for clout, right? Yeah, because I can see multiple artists at Lollapalooza being like, oh, I'm not going to associate because of whatever, whatever.

And then they lose five artists. Like maybe gay artists that are performing, they're like, oh, I'm not going to associate because of whatever, whatever. And then they lose five artists. Maybe gay artists that are performing, they're like, yeah, I don't want to be on the same stage. So they got to protect themselves from losing the artists. Do we lose one or lose five? Yeah. And I don't even think they're worried about the artists, but that is a good point. I just think they're worried about reputation. Well, that's what I mean. I mean, the money for the festival, also their reputation. Yeah, I literally

just think it's reputation. People are still going to go to the festival. No one's selling the tickets. They hype. Everybody's ready to be out there and get Delta'd. They're out there ready for that Delta. We've been seeing all these festivals go crazy. Numbers spiking. Nobody gives a fuck because nobody's afraid of the Rona no more. Let's go.

But they don't want the smoke. They don't want to be known as... And once one festival cancels, if you don't cancel him, now you're the homophobic. Right? So Lllapalooza said nah governor's ball just said nah right and now the governor's ball said not the baby realized how many millions of dollars he's gonna end up losing because of this because it's not just this it's your european tours it's all the tours around the world that you are going to be in

and this motherfucker doubled down that's the dumbest shit he kept doubling down i'm gonna be an icon. I'm going to be a star. Sometimes I got to know you're going to be apologizing. That's what you're going to do. And the issue is the double down was worse. I think probably worse than what he said initially. Why? I don't know.

Let him get it. Because the double down was like, because initially he says, like, if you don't have HIV AIDS or something that kills you in three weeks, put your lighter up. And it's like, that's insensitive, blah, blah. I get it. Yeah. But then he comes back and says and says no my gay fans are not nasty they don't have hiv aids or whatever yeah and so like he puts gas on the hiv thing yeah while like also separating like the gay community which like if you're already offended by what he said and you're in the gay community like what he said was more offensive to you and then he said y'all do

you i'm gonna do me yeah very much i don't care to you. And then he said, y'all do you, I'm going to do me. Yeah, which is very much, I don't care if you like me or not. That's what I'm saying. And then the gays were like, we will. Oh, we're going to do you, all right. You're going to get fucked in your ass financially. Get ready. He literally put the gas on them. Right?

He charged them up. He could have said nothing nothing but he basically said i dare you yeah and they took that fucking dare yeah and i think he underestimated like the influence yeah maybe i mean i think when you're at that level you understand your influence like i think he understood like a influence he overestimated debate yeah he thought that motherfucker was the guy leading the world right like i understand when you're built in that ecosystem the only people around you the people either kissing your ass or the people screaming your name because how famous

you are you start to think holy shit i'm the president i can say whatever the fuck i want to say what they gonna do right you know i think he put out a video like i don't know if it was the next day or something they already had filmed but like he had like a sign in the video filmed I think yeah they had like aids on the fucking sign so it looks like he was trolling yeah it was probably an older video I don't think so no he said I think he had a pose that said like he filmed that video then flew straight to uh rolling loud then performed and he had the video and no one was going to be a controversy or something which I don't think or he could have edited something onto the picture like it was going to be a controversy or something which I don't think or he could have edited something on the picture

like it might have been a film before edited after because he's like yeah let's put gas on it like make a moment maybe I mean I don't know

I just think I think it's just so funny to see these things happen and also there's the hypocrisy of these festivals right and they're aware

of their own hypocrisy they're in a situation where there's nothing they could do that's going to be consistent they're valueless they're moralists right and they have to be yes right if they say nothing they're absolutely trashed by the artists like what mark was saying artists could start saying i don't want to be a lollapalooza if you're not going to protect the lgbt community right but at the same time if they do take the baby off then we're going to go through every lyric of all the

other people that are there and surely, if we have some hip-hop dudes at this festival, there's going to be some F-bombs thrown. Yeah. I mean,

I think, I don't want to be snitching on these artists so I'm not going to do it, but like, it ain't hard to snitch. The motherfuckers said it and they're shit,

right? Tons of them, the people that are performing at those very shows have tons of homophobic lyrics. Old Matt Damon stuff just flying out of there. And that's just the homophobia.

You want to talk about other morally bankrupt shit that they're saying? They're going to have it in there. Which is interesting because I started to see that comment. You've made it a lot of times, but I started to see that comment in the comments on Da Baby. The lyrics of half of these guys are about murder and God knows what else. And now you have a problem with what he says? You don't have a problem with his own song? song which is a point again you've been making for

a while but this time i started to see that in the comments from like i started to see that voice get louder and i think what i'm realizing about like uh hip-hop i think that most people do this already with hip-hop so we don't need to create this caveat we have to create a comedy but hip-hop usually you get to say whatever you want with impunity but like i think what the thing with hiphop is, and the difference in comedy is, comedy is like, hey, we don't really believe these things. We're saying jokes. And these are playing off of feelings that we have but that we control in normal society and we don't act on these feelings. They're essentially all lies. But they tap into a feeling of truth.

Take my wife, please. You don't want someone to take your wife. But sometimes you're like, man, get this woman away from me. This is all Borscht Bell comedy, right? And that still exists today with all these feelings, right? So I think with hip hop is the rappers go, yo, this is my life. I was really out here doing this shit, killing people and selling drugs. They weren't most of them, right?

Maybe they're associated or kind of close or something like that. That being said, all of us got a little tony montana in us deep down we don't want to be a drug kingpin but we see the life we're like be kind of cool to be a drug kingpin yeah you know so there's a mafia documentary on netflix that just came out it's so fire and i'm so like yeah it looks so that looks amazing it's so cool in reality i don't want to kill people for no reason exactly but it's fucking i'll live vicariously through it in the music yes and i think all of us get to tap into that so when these lyrics are said i don't think we're living vicariously through the homophobia but the morally bankrupt

shit like murder and drug dealing and stuff like that there's something sexy about it because of film and television all these years what a dangerous lifestyle it is right some people might feel the same way about being a fucking biker gang or something like that so i understand like why we want to live that way and why for whatever reason it's more acceptable yeah i think the reason why it gets tricky with rap is because they're like nah that's really me i lived it if they were really like i'm kind of like a theater kid yeah yeah that's a little tega thing that's a little tega is his rapper and like he just said over and over like he's all these like lyrics like i make you dance with my glock like shit like that and then they go do you have guns he goes no i've never owned a gun i've never shot a gun it's like i've grew up in the suburbs i'm not in a gang i just like to rap

crazy shit because it's fun yeah he's like 18 year old kid and like his music is great yeah it's like us with jokes like we just make these we have these crazy feelings or a crazy perspective about a topic and we're like let's go let's make something funny and we elicit laughter with these ideas because they are so absurd they are so crazy so maybe one day we'll be able to treat rap in the same way homophobia is different because i don't think we're like tapping into like our like hatred right you know what i mean regardless of what robin d'angelo says that fucking bozo a bozo of a lady that lady is yeah i don't even know who she is no you shouldn't yeah i feel like i'm happier that way yes probably i wish i never was on twitter that day just to see her yapper stupid

fucking crusty nancy pelosi mouth about comedy just go back to writing books you fucking dork bitch yeah anyway so uh so uh she's just the lady who's like comedy's inherently racist as an excuse she she wrote white fragility is like her yeah that like got super famous she was the woman She's just the lady who's like, comedy's inherently racist as an excuse. She wrote White Fragility. It's like her big book that got super famous. She was the woman that like, Of course she's a white woman. Yeah, of course. I don't want to hear any white woman's opinion on racism ever.

She's white, can't assault. Like, you know how there always will be a place on the internet for a black person to tell white people they're not racist and that they haven't done anything wrong? There will always be a place on the internet for a white person to tell minorities people they're not racist and that they haven't done anything wrong. There will always be a place on the internet for a white person to tell minorities

that white people are all racist. You're monetizing white guilt just in a different way. In a different way. There's like, oh, I feel guilty

that I grew up in a racist place. Tell me that I'm not racist. Exactly. I respect Candace Owens more because she got to stand in fire. Her people are coming at her fucking neck.

Agree or disagree, she stands in a fire yeah this bitch is removing herself from the fire even totally goofy i don't know she probably has crazy death threats and shit like she probably has her own shit i'm like yeah i wouldn't want to be on the fringe either way trying to monetize people's guilt that's yeah it's just a it's a weird way to make a living cancel her cancel her take her out of arnton noble or wherever the fuck she wants to be the issue with the baby thing to me is that i mean obviously you say shit that's crazy but he like when you

attach it to like hiv and aids it's like so much more visceral yeah like if you're saying like like i don't know there's all these lyrics that people are pulling up from rappers and shit being like oh i don't fuck with gay shit yeah but when you are saying like when you're putting this like visceral attachment to things that like people died from that i don't know it makes it a different association in your head i think if he just said the parking lot thing he'd be fine mark i'll be completely honest with you and this goes back to the chris drop joke if he said that in a song he's fine yeah even the hiv even the hiv no matter what you say if it's in a song it's totally fine because what happens is in a song we could tap into the joke thing hey this you say, if it's in a song, it's totally fine. Because what happens is in a song, we could tap into the joke thing.

Hey, this is just a joke. This is just a piece of art. I'm living vicariously through it. It's like, okay, these guys are, it's fine. It's kind of fucked up. It's like the bigotry of low expectations. You guys have heard that. But I really think there's a lot of people that are just like, it's okay if rappers are homophobic because they don't know better.

They're from circumstances where they don't know better. And it's like you're actually holding them to a lower standard it's kind of fucked up but uh but that being said like if it was in a song you'd be able to chalk it up to oh it's just rhyming a moment and taking this passionate thing blah blah blah but the fact that there wasn't any beat going it's like you being a person it's the difference like we always say is like if the if the racist or homophobic or bigoted thing you say is the joke it's okay you're not gonna cancel something for the joke but if you say it as you're walking down the street and someone cuts you off you can't go oh yeah it's just a joke so it felt like he wanted that he felt like he really felt that way and then when he doubled down on it it's like you dummy you dummy all you have to do is say you're sorry and you

don't lose millions of dollars all right guys let's take a break for a second because some of y'all need some new motherfucking earphones dog that's right your shits are falling out your shits are getting lost the wire is getting all fucked something's wrong you can't hear stuff you can't hear this glorious podcast okay you can't hear the hilarious comedy clips that are coming out of here you need to be able to digest content and you need some motherfucking earbuds to help you do it. And I'm telling you, Raycon is the truth. Am I wrong, Akon? Bro, I got them right here.

Warmed the whole way here listening to podcast music. Best thing is the fucking battery life lasts all day. 24-hour battery life. I've used them while moving with brand new pairs. And I had a brand new pair because I lost my other pair. Got these. Still cheaper than other competitors. Double down. Get two.

Bro, it's the best. It's the move. Also, they're half the price. So you might as well just get two. Just buy two off rip. Buy two off rip. I mean, the Raycons, they come with a 45-day happiness guarantee. So if you really can't lose here, if you try them and you're not happy,

then they're going to rectify that situation. A 45-day happiness guarantee. You do it. They have 32 hour battery life. So you can listen to what you want when you want for a really long fucking time. How infuriating is it? You get down to the gym. You don't want to work out. You finally motivate yourself to work out. You're about to hop on the treadmill. You put your fucking earbuds in and then boom, they're not on. Now with Raycons, they're ready to go. Matter of fact, I have two pairs charged up and you'll never have an issue at all. Okay. I'm telling you, man,

Raycons are the truth. They are not playing around the best way to listen. So what I'm going to recommend is that you create your own soundtrack with Raycon. Right now, our podcast listeners can get 15% off their Raycon order by going to buy raycon.com slash flagrant that's by raycon.com slash flagrant to save 15 off raycons by raycon.com slash flagrant now let's get back to the show that's also a place where having a hype man is really not helpful because they he gassed them right the hype man's like yo y'all looking sus as a motherfucker right now yeah yeah it's like all right, y'all looking sus as a motherfucker right now. Yeah, yeah. It's like, all right, no, I didn't mean to say that.

Don't hype that part. Hype it in the other way. Be like, he didn't mean it. So what does he do? Do you think that he's good now that he apologized? You know how I know he apologized? Because he called them the LGBTQ plus community. Oh, he added the plus.

That motherfucker. He didn't write none of that shit. No, he didn't write none of that shit. Plus his lawyer or whoever his. None of it. But that's a full ass apology. When you throw the plus sign, bruh. Oh, it added the plus. He didn't write none of it. That's his lawyer or whoever it is. None of it. That's a full-ass apology. When you throw the plus sign, bruh. It was hilarious, dude. And immediately tapped into the victim status. Immediately was like,

someone coming from the circumstances I've come from. It's like, aw, are you coming out too? After you doubled down, tripled down on homophobia. Did you come from rough circumstances? Did you? Like, i don't know having aids maybe it was as rough as that it's just adorable to see people completely flip a lot he literally said i'm gonna be a icon or something in one of his posts which is respectable if you

don't give a fuck and you can sit in it hey man respect hey bro once that once that motherfuckers start buying shit before they get money And once that future money Stops coming in You already bought shit At least in your head But you might have Paid for it already And then when you start going

Oh I can't afford that boat Oh I can't afford that Brand new house I can't afford that Brand new car Because I refuse to Apologize for some shit I don't even give a fuck about

He don't think about Gay people He don't think about AIDS It means nothing to him. Yeah. So he's going to lose it all over someone who means nothing to them? Yeah.

Shit. I apologize. Plus. I'm adding a plus. Icing on a cake. Yeah. Once you get fuck you money, you got to plan to keep the fuck you money.

Yeah. You can't start buying shit. Otherwise, you can't say fuck you to anybody. It's I'm sorry. Exactly. It's oh, fuck me? Okay, I guess so. Yeah. Just can't start buying shit. Otherwise, you can't say fuck you to anybody. It's I'm sorry. Exactly. It's oh, fuck me? Okay, I guess so.

Yeah. Just be a star. I mean, it's stupid. Like, I don't know. Like, why would you die on that hill? I don't understand these motherfuckers. Like, there are hills to die on? That is not the one, yo.

It's hard. Why die on that hill? It's hard because people start coming at you and then your pride swells up and you're like, oh, fuck you. But you're not even religious. Like, if you were religious and living your life as a Christian man, and you attached yourself to this, like, religious homophobia,

that's even more understandable. But if you're not a devout Christian, Jew, Muslim, I don't know if Hindus or Sikhs care about gay people, if there's no benefit, if you're just being homophobic for homophobia's sake. For a hobby? For a hobby? That's retarded.

You get nothing out of it. You don't even get to go to heaven. God's looking at you like, yo, you killed someone, fam. You're not getting in here. You're going down to hell with all those other motherfuckers that you hate. It was self-defense.

It was self-defense. But you understand what I'm saying? Yeah. Like, homophobia as a hobby is crazy, B. Yeah. There's a lot of part-time religious people who only pick out certain things, what I believe and what I don't believe. Oh, going against God is a sin.

It says so in the Bible. Pretty sure it also says in the Bible, don't get tattoos, essentially. Like, don't put ink on your body. And they do that shit. Like, people are very pick and choose with religion. You kind, to a degree, you have to be, but some people are really OD, like, I don't know, God hates gay people. I'm going to heaven.

I'm not gay. I'm going to fuck everybody before I'm married, but I'm not gay. That's just the only thing he cares about. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I don't know. I will say this. I got to give a huge shout out to the Asshole Army, man, because. Yes.

Huge shout out, because, yo, yo mateo lane came on and he killed it and he he did the things that we care about most when guests come on this podcast is he is you be authentic and you be funny yeah that's really what this is about you be flagrant you be authentic you be funny and i know for guests it's intimidating to come into this space also especially if you're a gay dude because you're like all right this might be a boys club they might just rip me make fun of me not us but also the audience and now you're putting yourself on this really massive platform and you could be scrutinized in a way that might be really uncomfortable yeah and mateo came up to me man he's like bro i i was the response has just been so amazing i think in like a few days you got like

13 000 instagram followers amazing like the feedback has been crazy and i just been so amazing. I think in a few days, you got 13,000 Instagram followers. That's fucking amazing. The feedback has been crazy. And I just felt so proud of y'all. And I mean this sincerely. You can rip me for being fucking corny or sentimental as soon as I'm done, guys. But I felt really proud of y'all because we're not one of these fucking... We didn't build some hack shit where we're tapping into a river that already exists. There's a lot of motherfuckers that they don't have an identity.

They don't have a personality. They got to tap into whatever the identity or personality is that exists out there. For example, when Trump was popping, there's people who got to tap into the Trump, we love him folks and the Trump, we hate him folks. You know what I'm saying? him folks and the trump we hate him yeah folks you know what i'm saying and there are people that made a living tapping into we hate trump and the people made a living tapping into we love trump and now that trump's gone they all starving yeah right we create our own identity based on who we are because we are all a little bit outsiders in our community and we united on this idea of flagrancy this idea on say the funny jokes rip each other but it's love and we brought a dude in here and the dude was

just funny he ripped us we ripped him we had a great fucking time and y'all appreciated it and i think it really meant a lot to him to come into an environment like this and and be successful so i just want to say thank you and it just makes me really proud that we got a, we got a place. We bring anybody in this motherfucker. I don't care who you are, what you look like, whose dick you suck. And, and as long as you are flagrant,

you are authentic and you are funny that you will succeed. So now you guys can roast me for being. Nah, it was dope. I think there are preconceived notions about what the podcast is about what the fans are. And it's nice to see that you're not. Why are you laughing? What?

Like, Oh man, you know, I was sentimental. I'm gay now. You got to roast me. Like, you just did the right thing. And now you're a hero for it. Like, this motherfucker like. Yo, no matter what I do, it's wrong. Yeah.

I'm with my girl. And now you're doing it. And now you're doing it. Yeah, come on. Get your flowers, bro. Jesus Christ, bro. You're so thoughtful. Yo, son.

This is like there's a scene in Twilight that made me react how you're reacting. That's the gayest shit you said so far. I know, right? That's so gay. I was going to defend you, and then you said, this reminds me of Twilight. That's a problematic series, fam. Yeah. I don't know if y'all seem problematic.

I don't know if y'all seem problematic.. I don't know if y'all seen Twilight. He's using words like problematic. Who is this guy? That shit is problematic, dude. Like, how is there not bad writers? Triggering too. It's triggering. It's triggering.

It was triggering, son. Like, I felt triggered watching that shit, dog. I don't even like saying that word. That shit is close, bro. Yeah. That's why they love saying it. White people love saying it because it's close. It was triggering because you got bricked up by the wolf guy.

I was so bricked up, dude, by these vampires. Not a wolf guy. Not a wolf guy? Taylor Lautner? Yo, the fact that you even know his name. Yo, I kiss a piece, bro. I love Taylor Lautner. Jacob, sir.

His name is Jacob. Are you team Jacob or Edward? Yo, come on. It's team Edward, dog. He looks like that motherfucker. Because he looks like that motherfucker. Y'all, that's a good point. Don't give him that much credit.

I'm better looking than that motherfucker. Stop it. He's got a big, bushy-ass eyebrows. He got no lips. He ain't got lips like that. Nah, it's Team Jacob. It's Team Jacob. Nah, nah, nah.

Who got more bricks out of you? Yo, he would like Team Jacob. I love Team Jacob on this, though. He's a beefcake, though. Also, if you were in the Y, what's the time of the podcast right now if you were just in the Y go back a little bit I'm pretty sure you're the one and and he went like this. He actually turned his head a little bit more And he went like this. He actually turned his head a little bit more when he went to the table.

I go behind the mic now. No, he went a little bit more. And he went, dude. Bro, I did it. I did it. What? Chill out. Chill out.

Chill out. Chill out. So real quick. There's a moment in Twilight, right? Like where Bella, the shorty, whatever her name is, Kristen Stewart, right? Bella finds out some shit or something is exposed about Edward's past that he never told her told her no he has to like tell her something he never told her about him right and after he became a vampire this is the news he breaks her like the news is about to break her heart and make her think that she don't know if she can be with this guy because he's morally bankrupt he's the baby right there's no way that she could possibly be with him this is the thing it goes

back and it plays this like past history shit where he's out here and he's biting humans right and you think that he's just hunting like regular humans but it turns out he was hunting like rapists and serial killers and that kind of shit like that so like the moment where he's about to be a piece of shit turns out he's even more heroic and i had the reaction that you had which is like i was like fuck you fuck you being perfect you literally want to spend forever with this girl like that's what he's saying this is the ideal scenario for any woman right like i just want to spend not only the rest of my life i want to spend forever they're vampires they don't die they literally spend forever like your life isn't enough the bitch who wrote this movie is absolutely psychotic.

Yeah, that's Stephanie Meyer. Stephanie Meyer is absolutely psychotic. We can't just spend just life. It's forever. It can't even be till death do us part. No, there ain't no part in it. There ain't no part in it, bro. I'm watching this shit.

So that scene comes on. I'm like, what the fuck? And then for whatever reason, I get into this movie. The Jacob character, right? This movie's problematic. First of all, my man is 100 years old he's 100 years old dating a 16 year old

that's not weird I can't believe we've spent this much time on this he didn't have a podcast when it came out bro that's what happened that's not weird the Edward character

is 100 years old dating a 16 year old that's not weird he's 100 years old going to high school and hitting on 16 year olds that's not weird that's not awkward

that's not weird just cause he looks young he looks young but He looks young, but mentally he knows shit. He could be in college. Why not just go to college? Exactly. Go to college.

Yeah. You could fuck regular age pussy if you want. And it's actually more reasonable he goes to college. If he's 100 years old, the age of consent was younger then.

It don't matter. He's now. Don't go back into consent, Mark. Do not do this. Do not be making fucking arguments For this man So then I'm like alright this is super weird But I'm gonna let it go

Then the wolf Jacob The hottie with the body Wolves do this thing I guess called imprinting Where you just choose your mate and then that's your mate That's the person you're meant to be with And it's not even up to your control Not even up to your control You just see somebody and you imprint on them And that's it you you're meant to be with and it's not even up to your control. I hate it. You're about to hate it even more. Not even up to your control.

You just see somebody and you imprint on them and that's it. You cannot do anything about it and that's it forever. I shit you not. I don't know how this is not a fucking huge news story.

Where's CNN? CNN, where are you? This is a problem. Hello, what is the problem? The mainstream media is so bullshit, bro. Dude, where's QAnon? QAnon should be all over this. What the fuck is going on? QAnon, Alex Jones, the problem hello what is the mainstream media is so bullshit bro dude where's q anon q anon q anon alex jones like this is the normalization of pedophilia and all this shit oh my god

normalization here it is oh my god literally bella has a baby i don't mean who's bella bro jacob oh you got all the way up to jacob baby You know the numbers? Oh, yeah. I watch this shit. How do you know? At least I watched it when I was in high school. Like a real straight human being. What is that? You're not getting off on that.

You saw when it came out, you fucking. How fucking good. I can't believe that. In the movie theater. In the movie theater. That's way good. Nah, y'all both getting off on it. My girl had that shit on.

She passed out five minutes in. I'm like, oh Oh what we got over here Right So my man My man Jacob Sees a baby A newborn baby For the first time

A baby Oh shit And imprints on a child Oh shit That's yeah Imprints on a child A baby A baby

Yeah that's true There's later Like even Epstein would be like What the fuck is wrong with you dog right so that's true super weird and then later he goes no no it's not even like that it's not even like that i can't decide yeah pedophiles can't decide either whether they like kids or not yeah the baby starts aging exponentially fast the baby's looking like seven years old later on there's a scene at the end of the movie where the fucking wolf, Jacob, looks at Edward. And they're both looking at Edward's kid and Jacob's soon-to-be thing.

And Jacob goes, so should I start calling you dad now? Why are we joking around about this? The bitch that can see the future. I forget her name. What's happening, yo? Shut up. You're ruining the momentum. You're ruining the momentum.

You're ruining the momentum. It's just, listen. He goes like this. He goes, the bitch that can see the future starts to look in the future of Jacob and the daughter, right?

Yeah. Looks in the future and sees Jacob and the daughter being in a relationship and going away together. Can she see what they were doing? No, but I imagine one style

might happen. So, I guess my point, but my point is, how crazy is it? They teased it, and you're like, they're not really going to go there. Yeah. And they went there, and nobody, there's nothing wrong with that. There's not a problem. Nah. But wait, why did he imprint on the baby?

Was it like a fuck you to Edward? I can't decide. I can't decide. You have no control. It's not up to me. What? That was the answer? It's up to the writer who decided that.

Why did the writer decide that? Imprinting any of these vampire bitches. You imprinted a fucking child? Yeah. That's weird, bro. Yeah, that's problematic. And shorty was aging in dog years, too. Like, she was aging mad fast.

Remember how fast a baby was aging? So maybe there's something there. But that's not weird, bro. It has to be on a baby, though, right? No. No, it could be on anybody. Is it a human being? 18-year-old girl. Why not just get an 18-year-old? It's the only It has to be on a baby, though, right? No. It could be on anybody. Is it a human being? 18-year-old girl.

Why not just get an 18-year-old? It's the only imprinting that happened on a child. Everybody else imprinted as adults. Everybody else is with adults. And he sees a kid for the first time, this fucking pedophile weirdo, and just starts howling. Red Rocket pops out, probably. Say what?

The Red Rocket with the lipstick. Matt Gross, like what are you doing, dude? Son, that's not weird, Twilight. That's weird. That's weird. With all the problematic

shit you see in movies that we're talking about, oh, look at this, there's not enough diversity, there's not enough this, there's actual pedophilia happening in a film. Yeah, but women

won't cancel women fun. They will only cancel our fun. It's got to be something men like for it to be problematic. This is women cancel our fun. It's got to be something men like for it to be problematic. This is women's Michael Jackson. You know how we love Michael Jackson so much

we look past that shit, right? They love Jacob so much that he admits to being a pedophile in the movie and they're like, but the body. The wolf's a pedophile? God, not Jacob. It's a full moon.

He has to. Isn't that fucked up? Do the wolves live a long time or is it just the vampires well i don't know i was gonna lie i was gonna lie but then i don't know that would that would make it double creepy if he was mad old also if he was a super old no werewolves can only die from silver bullets right no all the rules change and they just change rule for vampires they change rule for vampires. They change rule for everything in this fucking world. Werewolves, 50, 60 years, and then the vampires, 150 to 200 years. I was going to say the average age.

No, vampires live forever in that one. Yeah. Where are you getting this? You Wikipedia this? They're also not werewolves. Wait, what are they? They're just wolves. They're Native Americans that are also part wolf,

and they only get to turn into wolves if vampires are around. So they need vampires. So they can't kill the vampires All I'm saying is if Native Americans turn into animals Maybe we did it right there Son Come on Come on Come on Al

You crazy You're a wild boy I'm wild Come on, yo. Al, what? Come on, Al. You crazy. Where's he saying if? He's saying if. You're a wild boy. I'm wild? No, you're a wild boy. They turning into wolves. Native Americans can't turn into animals, and there shouldn't have been a genocide. There should not have been, right?

Did we genocide them? Or did we have diseases that they didn't have, and we had them because we was living around animals? They talking all that shit about how animal-like they are, but where the disease is at? You know what I mean? This whole life I'm chief, you know, fucking eagle face, right? It's like maybe if you spent some more time with the eagles

and they live with you, you would develop some of the diseases they got and then you would be you know, impervious to disease like whites. This is what we did. We lived around the livestock in London. Is that how they got the diseases you think? Didn't you do enough to the fucking natives, son? What did I do?

Your people? Catholics. What did I do? Not only is he Catholic, he's also Canadian. This motherfucker is responsible. Oh, my God. Jesus Christ. Adios mio.

Why are there no Indians in India? Zut alera. Why are there no Indians in India? That's a good point. Why are there no Indians in India? Son, they left. They trusted you guys no you guys killed them all imagine we got to y'all bro

you would have gotten us so fast wait we got there eventually yeah but they had made enough of them yeah but what if we just had you drink the water you'd have been fucked no white people can't handle everything no you can't go to ind, drink the water. White people can handle that. Honestly, white people back in the day are different than white people now. White people back in the day, literally, we went everywhere, drank their water, fucked their bitches. You know what I mean? Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's it.

No, I'm joking. But you didn't make it to India. We built different. No, they didn't make it to India. There's white people right now in Williamsburg walking around. You speak English because we were white people. There's white people right now in Williamsburg walking around the street barefoot. Yeah, we don't care.

His people. You think we still got it, though? I don't think white people now could colonize. I think it'd be tough, bro. I think it'd be tough. I think we fell off. I think we might have fallen off. But we had a heyday, son.

It was a good streak. It was like... Unbelievable. You had a Patriots run. We had a Patriots run. We were the Patriots, bro. But now it's over. By the way, call yourselves a Patriots. 100%. Now we had it, bro. And we could just pull patriots bro now it's over by the way call ourselves a

patriots 100 now we had it bro and we could just pull up anywhere like it's over so imagine the confidence like we could pull up anywhere there's people don't even speak the language they're absolute well they probably weren't savages they had organized societies but we called them absolute savages right and then we're like we're just gonna come in here organize everything and take everything like the confidence Did that ever fail? With every times we went there and then got pushed back? Like, holy shit. What was the streak like?

It was just because you had weapons. Once the plane fails even now, y'all can't embody nobody anymore. That is true. But like, imagine going there. Isn't that the book that basically explains how white people took over? But why we invented weapons so quick and none of y'all invented weapons? Y'all weak. Y'all needed it.

We didn't need that shit. We dealt with that shit with our hands, son. That's how we dealt with it. Yeah, but then when we came through, what happened? Yeah, because we didn't need that. Y'all needed that, son. Y'all still liked it afterwards, right?

Yeah, after, because we got to even up the playing field. That's it. I don't even know if y'all even up the playing field. I think we were just like, I think we should stop this now. It's too easy. All right. Go to Chicago right now.

Get body. Nah, you're right. I will get body in Chicago. But you understand the point. It's kind of crazy. To go anywhere you want. Nah, you got a good run. Real confidence.

There's a spot in India that's never been touched. What is that called? The little island where they got all the native people that no one's been to oh when the one christian guy tried to go and then they just arrowed that yeah he got shot with mad arrows really yeah it's a wild story oh you didn't hear about this no you went there preaching the gospel and they were like no fam this is untouched nobody's been over there yeah they just murder everyone that steps on it yeah it was like a boat that like the guy stuck at sea and drifted over and killed him. I mean, let's be honest.

We could take that shit if we wanted. We could. Why did we leave it there? What is the point of that? I don't know. I think it's more just people being like, yo, what do you think is going to happen? White guilt? Nah, nah.

I don't think it's white guilt. I think they're curious. That's your biggest weakness is your guilt. Yeah, it is. Y'all figure that out. And that, you know where guilt comes from. Where's that? Catholicism.

Catholic guilt is, that's the pinnacle of guilt. You used our religion against us, and Gandhi really flexed on that guilt shit. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That was genius. That was the genius. You just got to do it in little increments. I'm not going to eat. Just got to do it in little increments.

Yeah, black people go over the top of that shit. We'd be giving black people a little bit off of guilt, and then they just go extra. They're like, kiss my feet. You got to just pump the brakes every once in a while. The critical race theory. You know what I mean? They went too far, bro. Yeah.

It is true. It's like everybody got on board with Black Lives Matter. And then a few black people are like, I have white people on a leash on Tuesdays. I was just walking around the neighborhood. I was like, chill. Son, that was places motherfuckers were washing their feet. I know. That shit was wild

crazy you saw the videos of the guys going through brooklyn be like yo take a knee for black lives matter and then mad white people were like all right fine and they actually took a knee they like what can you do dog you say no you say what are you talking about like yeah but you know you too scared of black people i gotta go around the city i gotta do a skit of some shit like that see what all the wild shit i could make y'all do you could man dude the way that white people treat black homeless people versus white homeless people i i don't feel any sympathy for white homeless is hysterical yeah dude it is i was watching the especially young kids like young white kids that are like in college in new york for the first time the way that they were treated

there's this black homeless dude inside this like bodega, right? And the way that they were treating this black homeless guy, right? It was just, it was, oh yeah, man, like the black homeless guy is like trying to butter him up so he can get some money. He's like, oh, I like those sneakers, bro.

He goes, yeah, yeah, these are pretty cool, man. Like, I also have Jordans though, like, and he was just like doing these things. It was so embarrassing. He's like, I'm going to win over this black dude. It's so fucking crippling embarrassing. You know, Nick's face is like, yeah, Julius Randall is my favorite player, man. I love that guy, you know.

But I like the old Nick's too. Like, who's your favorite player? Oh, John Starks. Dude, I love John Starks, number three. Like, he's trying to win over this homeless guy. Unbelievable, right? There's a white homeless dude outside. As they walk out, the guy goes, can you spare some change?

And the kid just looks at him and be like, disgusting. It was unbelievable. Zero sympathy for it. And what is that? It's just guilt, right? We don't feel as bad for white homeless people because our brain can compartmentalize like, ah, he probably had a lot of opportunity. Yeah.

But you still ain't getting my money either way. I think it's also like, I want to prove I'm not racist. And here's the opportunity. With the baby shit, with the festivals and all this, I was like, I want to prove my support for the LGBTQ community. Here's a tweet. You know the best way to prove you're not racist? Don't try so fucking hard.

I know. I remember I had a joke. I was like, in order for minorities to know you're not racist as a white person, you got to be a little racist. You got to be just enough. You got to be a little racist. You got to to be just enough. You've got to be a little racist. You've got to point out the shit that's obvious that we all see. Because if you're like, what are you talking about?

I didn't notice that one bit at all. What happened? There was a smoke and then an Asian guy disappeared? That's normal. You've got to at least say the thing we're all saying. Is that fair to say? Yeah, that is. And then they go, oh, okay, yeah, he's just a normal human being.

Yeah, I did that the other day where I had to call the store, and they were like, oh, yeah, who was helping you? And they were like, was it Charlene? And I was like, it was the little Asian girl. And the guy was like, oh, okay, yeah, yeah, yeah. But we were having this back and forth for two minutes. We were like, what does she look like? Yeah, fucking.

I was like, really? Yeah, he had curly hair. She was the only Asian girl in the whole thing. Yeah, Asian. Yeah, just say it. You start there. Start with the race. Asian.

If that's the signifying factor. If they're all Asian in there, and there's one girl with hoop earrings, I go, oh, yeah, the girl with hoop earrings. That's it. That's funny. You guys hesitate. I start with race off top. Yeah.

That's how I'm scripting. White dude that did that. Brown dude that did that. I do it out of principle. Off top. Yeah. You're allowed to. Yeah.

Beautifully. Now, I do it too. I do it too, but there are people that are uncomfortable beautiful. Now, I do it too. I'll principle you should do it. I do it too, but there are people that are uncomfortable by it. But I do it too, and I maybe lean into it even more because I know it makes people uncomfortable. It is tough if you're complaining about the service, though, because then you could look real, if you lean into it more, be like, no, this guy didn't give me good service.

This black guy. And be like, all right, I see where this is going. I wouldn't say that. But they were like, which one? I'd be like, yeah, that guy over there. Wait, what? Yeah, you didn't say race. Yeah, you didn't say race yeah i didn't no all right guys we're gonna take a break for a second because frankly dinner time can be chaotic and a lot of you are not getting the nutrition

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dope so for the first time in our history um people are coming for the mouse bro oh this is big this is actually really interesting yeah yeah yeah so scarlett johansson uh sued uh disney yes she sued disney and i think also emma watson emma stone is considering emma stone was considering suing disney as well they're suing disney because disney placed their movies i imagine cruella with emma stone and Black Widow with Scarlett Johansson, on Disney+, as well as a theatrical release, when they were both promised contractually for only theatrical releases. Now, Disney is going, hey, there's a pandemic.

Motherfuckers ain't going to the movies like they used to, so we're going to do both. Now, that hurts Emma Stone, and it hurts scarlett johansson because they get a piece of the theatrical ticket sales they don't get a piece of disney's uh subscriptions and i think you had to pay money to watch it on disney plus it wasn't just a subscription correct so they're looking at disney like hey yo yeah like give me a piece of that bread like if you charge your money for people to see this i don't give a fuck if it's in the theater or not. And I think they're completely reasonable. And I think it's a scumbag move on Disney's part. And Disney's response was basically like,

they include a Scarlett Johansson, yeah, this cow's response to the pandemic. We paid her $20 million, and they threw the $20 million in there, hoping people would be like, this bitch got $20 million, what's she complaining about? And that's true. And people will say that. Yeah.

But keep going. But you violated a contract. Exactly. If you violated a contract and you charged us if they made it for free you could say hey she's callous if you charged us when we couldn't go to the theater and i gotta watch on a smaller screen at my house and i don't get the movie theater experience you're just as callous you know it's funny sorry sorry go go no i mean if the deal is 20 million but it was supposed to be 40 like she got half the money and what's so fucking manipulative of disney's side is um knowing that people will see a number like that so astronomical a number they might never make in their life and be like why aren't you happy with that yeah right and you seem like an ungrateful bitch when you're complaining

about a contract that was breached by your employer. Yeah. Right? You guys came together, made this contract. Now, I understand every contract has what's called a force majeure clause in it, right? Right. And that's where an ungodly act, like a pandemic, comes in, and it can make the contract null and void, or you can switch certain things. But what I find interesting is, it's not like Scarlett Johansson's going, yo, you made a billion dollars last year, or five billion dollars, Disney, cough it up. Like, Disney, I don't think did bad during a pandemic a lot of people bought up that disney plus yep right they made okay money and if you're using this as a way to bolster subscriptions

that's great make more content but if you're charging people to see the movie it seems like the right thing to do yeah is to continue to. Now they might be looking at it like this. We're going to lose money on this movie because of the pandemic, but we're still going to pay you that full 20 million. We promise you, even though this movie ain't going to do close to what it was supposed to do, we're going to live up to our end of the deal, but because it's going to be a loss,

maybe not even leader, but it's going to be a loser for us. We're not going to give you any back ends. Do you think they go ahead? No, you just can't do the right thing you know i mean like you're in an infrastructure where you can't do the thing that is ethically correct when you have all these shareholders they're like yo we put up the money for this movie let's get our money back like why are we being nice to some actor we don't care about actors we don't respect them like yeah let's like the infrastructure set up to do the financially responsible thing and not the

ethically responsible. No, but that's so stupid at this timing because this was supposed to come out a year ago and then this was delayed. So things like Jungle Cruise with Disney that are coming out now, The Rock's not fighting back. They know it's a kind of shared theatrical and on-demand in-home experience. So

she's a victim of that coming out that year. But these streamers are spending for these losses coming out that year but these these streamers are spending for these losses right now in this battle with other streamers to get them so for them to not cough up if they were going to project that in a normal theatrical one she would have made 50 million as she's been she's already been in nine fucking marvel movies they should know a number that would have said you know what before there's a lawsuit yeah you that would have said, you know what, before there's a lawsuit, yeah, you probably would have made $40 or $50 and that extra $20, $30 million is nothing compared to this little debacle that's happening right now because it's going to happen now across the board with other folks.

And the bigger issue is that Netflix and Amazon have already developed mechanisms that predict, okay, it's only on Netflix. These movies, you see these like Michael Bay movies, they basically pay top of market to a Ryan Reynolds and a Michael Bay, including their buyout on the back end. So they're already anticipating on that. But Disney hasn't really come up with that formula. Let me clarify what that means real quick. So what they're doing is they're paying Ryan Reynolds. Let's say Ryan Reynolds says, for me to star in a movie, and I'm just making up this number, it's $10 million.

Plus, I get a piece of the theatrical release, piece of the ticket sales. What Netflix is doing in order to get Ryan Reynolds to do a movie on Netflix is saying, we're going to give you your $10 million and that piece of what ticket sales would be. We project you would get this much out back. Based on the last five movies or something like that.

So they basically come to, they're not an exact amount, but they come to some agreement. So let's say it's another 5 million or 10 million on top of that. They go, we'll give you the 20, so you come do a movie with us. And then Ryan Reynolds gets to go,

well, I'm not losing out by doing a movie here, and I get to be on the street. And it's agreed to up top, so you can't really argue after and say whatever. This has already been taken care of. So Disney, Paramount, Warner Plus, all these things, they're still just in the let's get subscriber

race right now. They haven't come up with this mechanism because they're also they want to have a theatrical release too. They want to have as many verticals as possible for one movie. They get their theatrical. They want their airplane their airplane revenue their hotel revenue their on-demand revenue but they're just not there yet so kovat is a reaction to this but so fucking stupid to do this because the person that backs scarlett johansson her point agent is arguably the most

powerful person in hollywood controlling hundreds of other top stars, directors, writers, so this is gonna start some real shit. So if he sells two of his clients, hey don't do a movie with Disney, fuck them. That hurts you. And I think Dove's initial point was, the amount of money they're spending just to get subscribers, this 20, 30 million extra you could have paid Scarlett Johansson to shut her up is such a drop in the bucket, just do it. Don't deal with the bad PR.

That's, I assume, yeah. Do you know how much Jungle Cruise cost? Jungle Cruise is a 300 million plus movie. That's crazy. Without anything for the size of a ride. How much was Black Widow? Because what if they had taken a loss on it? Yeah, I have a feeling that if Black Widow did well,

Scarlett would have gotten her money. That's what I'm thinking. And I think that Black Widow flopped. And I don't think anybody really cares about watching Black Widow. We can look at the numbers, but I didn't watch it. I would never turn it on. Did you watch it? No. I've seen it. Was it good? The moment was out. No, the movie sucked. It was trash. They might have

also taken a calculated risk in that this doesn't allow her to be in any Avengers movies after this. Who cares? Oh, does she get killed in it or something? No, I don't know. If she's upset and she causes a fucking dust-up about this, alright, well, I guess she won't be in know. But if she's upset and she causes a fucking dust up about this, all right, well,

I guess she won't be in any Marvel movies if she gets upset. But who cares? Nobody's going to miss Black Widow. I think they might have calculated that because Black Widow

and Hawkeye, y'all are there and I guess it's kind of cool, but I don't give a fuck. I don't want Hawkeye to have his own movie. Y'all barely got superpowers. Black Widow is a good negotiator.

All right, bitch. The thing at this point, Marvel movies are just like you need to watch them to understand the full story it's like every movie is going to have something that you have to see so you can understand the whole rest of the whole series and shit like that and so like right now they're setting up for the fucking universe because the universe is about to split into a bunch of different timelines so now they'll be able to bring back captain america or no iron man and captain america like they can bring back anybody who's died now because there's more time yeah

this is saying that this black widow cost i hate that what is that thing that it's a the multi-universe yeah but it's a device called a deus ex machina or something like that it's like some literary device where an act of God propels the protagonist forward instead of like clever story writing. Yeah. Like, you know, what is that movie with the nerds fucking love?

Stranger Things? No, no, no, no, no. Movie. There's like three of them. Ghostbusters. No, no, no. Orcs and shit. Lord of the Rings.

The Hobbit, Lord of the Rings. Like there's one point in time where like they're at the end of this cliff and the orcs are about to get them and all of a sudden these fucking eagles just come out of nowhere

and they take them to the next destination and it's like fam why don't you just get the eagles in the beginning of the movie and then they take you to where you need to go like if you always had the eagles

what are you waiting for like a rock comes and like crushes someone yeah it's just it's just lazy writing and I feel like this multiverse shit is kind of lazy

it's like okay there's multiple universes, so now we can get Iron Man back in the thing. I mean, this was in the comics written. It was already. Yeah, yeah, yeah. A long time ago. All right, so they've always been lazy. Yes.

Okay. Fair enough. I mean, whatever. I'll be in the movie if they ask. Okay, it doesn't matter what universe. I will go there, and I will be there. I want to be in the white Black Panther universe, where it's just white Black Panther.

That would be fucking sick. It's multiverse. There's unlimited universes. White Wakanda. I want to be there, and I'm the Black Panther. It's called America. White Panther. It is.

And I am him. I am the White Panther, dude. I'm going to be in white panther powerful i am powerful the power white panther tohalla don't take my that's true that's true plan yes okay what else we got going on your max, bro. Okay. We got to have a... You got to start wearing max again, bro. So news popped up. The comedy store is basically kind of like trying to motivate people to get vaccinated.

The audience as well. Yeah. They're going only vaccinated for the audience. Yeah. And comics and employees. And comics and employees. And this made news and i'll say back here in new york the comedy seller has already been like this everybody's got to be

vaccinated the audience has got to be vaccinated um and it was funny there was like no black people in the crowd the first few times i went on stage and i'm like oh is this the new like no fitted hat no timbers like this is how you keep black people out of establishments like you don't even have to talk about their clothes yeah no do r do-rags, no service. No, no. Just say vaccine, and then boom. You're going to have a very white, Asian, and Indian crowd. That's White Panther, right?

That's White Panther. So, yeah. So, now the comedy store in LA is doing it, and people are making a big deal of this. But I think this is what's going to happen. I think because the government can't say you have to get vaccinated, because the government can't say you have to wear a mask, they can't just because of the way that the American justice system is built. They can't just say that there are liberties. Private businesses can take it upon themselves to decide what the policy is. And that's just what's going to happen. The corporations are going to go,

if you want to work here, you're going to have to be vaccinated. Yeah. How do you guys feel about it? I didn't have a problem 10 years ago when the Christian guy was like, hey, I'm not making your gay wedding cake. It's not, it's something I believe is Christian. I didn't agree with the moral stance, but it is a private business. And a lot of people who probably are going to have a problem with this were like, nah, that guy should have a right to conduct business as he wants to, but then they have an issue with people requiring masks and vice versa people who before were like no he should have to make that gay wedding cake it doesn't matter this is a business blah blah blah whatever their logic was they're going to support this and say oh no it's a private business now you should be allowed to keep out

people who are unvaccinated i think on both sides you keep your business do what you want to do conduct it how you'd like right yeah from a consumer level i agree from like an employment level i think it's tricky like if the if the shop was like discriminating hiring people for being gay then i'd be like oh no that's fucked yes agreed i think that should be illegal to not hire someone just based off like their orientation whereas like making a cake is like oh that's just a consumer yeah and so i think you're able to pick and choose consumption but as far as like employment i feel like that's different. That is interesting, though. But for the vaccine, do you feel the same? Sorry.

Do you feel the same consistency? Because I think there is a difference if it's like, this guy could infect me or my customers or whatever. Well, it can't affect you if you're vaccinated. Yeah, that's true. That's true, actually. But private companies already have rules for their employment. Like, there are some drug tests, some don't. So it's like, that's based on a private company.

So they should be allowed to do that for vaccines as well. And now we're at a stage where people with a Delta variant for vaccinated folks and unvaccinated folks, the spread is the same. That's not true. Apparently, that's media misinformation. Is it? Yeah, the Biden administration is mad at the media now.

Oh, are they? Is the news fake oh are they yeah now the news is fake okay another thing i'm upset about that i discovered in europe where i just was yeah levanting is that they have this european green pass that i know just just banting that if you actually get credit for being a COVID survivor, as we all are, for six months. Not like within 90 days we have to go race over to CVS and get the vaccine. Why are we not looking at natural protection? Look, it's tricky. It's annoying. I'm not annoyed as much about the vaccine thing being mandatory because I've taken it.

So it affects me in no way. If I don't know why, like I understand that people are really concerned about the vaccine and they think that it's really awful and something's going to happen. It's an experiment. Yes, that might be the case. But I don't know. For whatever reason, if I'm being completely honest with you i'm just like whatever i really just feel whatever about at this point because i've taken it already now my arm could fall off in six months that's possible and then you guys call me a fucking

idiot and i'll be competing in the special olympics or whatever just killing these motherfuckers right working that nose like a fish yeah exactly i point that shit up there that's the rudder that's the rudder uh but's the rudder, bro. But I'm just like, I don't care if you take it or not. I'm not going to be one of these people who's going to go, you need to get the vaccine. I don't give a flying fuck if you take it or not, but I also don't give a flying fuck if you die from COVID.

Agreed. Now, if you take the vaccine and you die from COVID, I'm furious. Yeah. Because why are we doing this experimental shit and then we're still dying? But that's not happening. Yes, the dying anyway. But that's not happening. Yes. The numbers are showing that that's not happening. The death rates haven't changed.

No, the vaccine is effective. The vaccine is effective. It's definitely effective when it comes to dealing with the virus in your system. So it makes it much easier to deal with. Yeah. Like I know somebody who got the Delta variant. She didn't have the vaccine and it fucking roasted her up. It was really bad.

And she had the original one. So Corona ran it back with her with that Delta and she said it was way worse. But if she had the vaccine, she would have plowed through that shit or she wouldn't have even gotten infected. There are some. So max people are like,

yo, you can still die from Delta with the vaccine, but it's like less than a half a percent. It's like 0.001% are dying from it. And most of those people either have some illness already. This is my point about... We got to stop making policy based on motherfuckers that are fat. Stop it.

Stop making clothes for them. Stop doing everything for them. No, no, no. Please make clothes for them. No, no, no. I don't want no naked fat people walking around. I want that.

Squeeze it out like a sausage? Yes. Yes. Yes. But in terms of the mask mandate, you cannot, the flu kills more than.001% of the people who get it. We don't have a mask mandate in place for the flu. You can't have a mask mandate based on.001% of people who are dying or people who have

made a choice that they were allowed to make, which is, I don't want to get this vaccine. I also think at the same time, a business has a right to say have a choice and say fine you can't come into my business and if you die we don't give a fuck but i don't want that choice to be that we wear a mask i'm over the mask i'm not wearing this anymore i got the vaccine if you get the vaccine you don't have to wear the mask and that's it i'm fucking sorry but that actually i'm not even sorry that's it i got the shit in my arm i'm not wearing the fucking mask the only pushback and this is what i heard it could be incorrect knowledge but i heard that so because you're getting the vaccine in the muscle um you're building up your immune system but it's not

like building up in your nostrils where most people are contracting i'm telling you it's like the delta variant it the it multiplies way quicker than the original one and so you don't have enough fucking immune system to fight it in viral load in your nose to that's why people are getting it still but you're not dying if you're yeah if that's the key if you're getting it and you get sick like you do with the flu we don't have mandatory flu vaccine or flu mask that's why they're saying you should still wear a mask you can suggest it it's and i can say fuck you yeah i guess yeah we're not doing a mashup we're not doing a mash that's what i'm saying i think at a should still wear a mask because it's covering the place. We're not doing a mask shit.

We're not doing a mask shit. That's what I'm saying. I think at a certain point, you've got to move on. There's an effective vaccine that's out. It's been out long enough for people to get it. It's free for people to get it. And at a certain point, you've got to be like, all right, let's keep them moving. And we have effective treatments when people do get it. That's the other thing. You know how to handle it. I don't care about cases anymore. I care about death rate. Death rate, hospitalization, all that matters.

If the death rate's down and the hospitals aren't overflowing then we're good to go shut your fucking mouth and go about business as usual I'm sorry stop doing this bullshit where you like

create legislation to make it seem like you give a flying fuck about saving people's lives when nobody's dying the death rate is not changing until it changes shut your fucking mouth

don't tell us to wear the mask I don't want to seem like I'm one of these like karens outside of a kroger's just like waiting to see if someone asked him to put a mask that's about i took the risk yeah i put my life on the line quote unquote i don't believe that that's the case but like i put the shit in my body yeah based on a contract that if i put it in my body, I can go back to life as normal. Don't break that contract. Well said. And do not break it for motherfuckers

that are willing to risk getting it. Yeah. Like you're protecting people who don't want to be protected. Yeah. If kids started dying every two seconds of this shit, I'd be the first person to have it on. Trust me.

I'd be the first person. They're not dying. The only people that are dying are the motherfuckers that refuse to get the vaccine. And me. I'll be the first person. They're not dying. The only people that are dying are the motherfuckers that refuse to get the vaccine and if they do have the vaccine, they are on death's doorstep already. And this shit is just pushing them off

like that fucking game with the quarters that are at the edge. You know what I'm talking about? The token shit in Coney Island? Not only are you protecting people who don't want to be protected, you're doing it at our expense.

They've decided they don't want to be protected and now you are having us make sacrifices that we specifically got this vaccine to not make yeah and look at who does this help who i can i can't understand i was watching like saga on on uh and crystal on the on breaking points and they're like they want power they but what what who is they can so the only person i can see winning out of this is or person or group or institution is Big Pharma because they can do booster shots. So the more people that have the virus, the more people you can give boosters to. So if I'm looking at this in terms of financial benefits and every year I got a booster ass up with some of this COVID juice.

And it's mandatory. And it's mandatory for you to work at your job. Mandatory for you to be on stage as a comedian. Mandatory for all city workers, right? The more people who have to have the vaccine in order to operate with normal life, in normal life, are going to be the more people

that are going to get a booster. And why wouldn't I want to make a nice fat check on 300 million people? 300 million people each take, let's say it costs $10. I'm making that up. It could cost $1, people each take, let's say it costs $10. I'm making that up. It could cost $1,000. But let's say a booster costs $10.

300 million people got to take that every single year just in America? Do that math, bro. That's $3 billion. I mean, yeah. If you look at Pfizer's overall earnings, I think in 2021, they made $19 billion,

an increase of $9.1 billion from the year prior. And deserved for all the lives that they've saved. Because they made an effective vaccine? They made an effective vaccine, and they saved people's lives. They saved grandparents. They saved parents. They saved brothers.

They saved sisters. Like, motherfuckers got their loved ones because they were out there doing it. So if you want to make some billion dollars off of that shit, I'm with it. Let's go. That being said, if you are pushing- That makes sense, actually. Right? That being said, if you are pushing policy so that you can make more money off these boosters when it's really not necessary, the death rates are not up, motherfuckers are not dying, you're just doing this shit so you could cash in next year and the year after, that's a little much, fam. Now you're getting a little greedy.

I fully expected we would have to take boosters. Early on, I was like, this is the new flu. this is what it's going to be but you got to push people in that direction there has to be a narrative that you can spin to say oh there's always going to be mutations we always need the boosters i think we're going to have to have boosters until it reaches the point where we can treat it effectively enough that you don't have to have a shot and then you can choose or not just like they just started i know i know this shit i know what this shit is i and i understand now it just not just like they just started it i know i know this shit i know that this shit is i and i understand now it just fucking hit me this is what it is

the madness that you're seeing in the news is obviously good for the news right because the news is going to sell fear they're new trump great ratings off of fear exactly something to replace trump but we need the fear okay so the news is going to run with it and they're going to be more than happy they're like wait a minute there's more fear for us to sell? We would gladly love to sell you this fear, Big Pharma. Big Pharma isn't trying to get legislation that says every human being is mandatory to be vaccined, right? Because they know that that's unrealistic. You can't make that happen in America. The laws just won't support it. I don't think they would mind it though. They would love it, but they know it can't physically happen. But they can create the fear of a new pandemic based on this Delta strain. The fear

is going to induce a reaction from the corporations. The corporations and the comedy clubs and any other place of work is going to say, we want your asses back in the office, okay? Because they are already starting to do that. And if you are coming back in the office, okay? Because they are already starting to do that. And if you are coming back into office, you need to be vaccinated. Big Pharma basically gets more people to be vaccinated so that they can do this booster scheme by bullying public sentiment into making corporations require mandatory vaccines. So it's not about we need more masks now. It's not about we're going to go back into a lockdown. It's not about that at all. It's literally how do we get motherfuckers vaccinated so we can boost them up a year later? If I sound like a conspiracy theorist, so be it.

But I think that makes sense what I just said. It makes sense. Question. So you guys are adamant about not putting masks back on. What if the new rule is you have to get a booster once a year to continue not wearing a mask? Are you doing it? Give me all 12 right now. I'll do 12 years of boosters right in my house.

You put it right in my nostrils. Do whatever the fuck. My head right in the R. Put it right there. I honestly, I had already in my mind, I was like, look, again, the flu mutates every year. This is a virus. It seems very contagious. It's going to mutate every year.

I think it would have mutated regardless. I'll get the booster. I don't give a fuck. I'm also not going to, to Andrew's point, if they say you have to wear masks, I'm not going to be the fucking guy yelling about my freedom, blah, blah, blah. I'll fucking comply. But I'm going to try to, just like Andrew,

I'm going to try to not wear it until you tell me to. Also, I will say this. I lied to you about the booster. I'm only going to take the booster if I get it again. You're going to wait until that shit runs out? Let me run it, bro. Like, I'm feeling good. No, no, no.

But I mean, what if they say like, oh, your shot is only, you got it within a year. Yeah. So after 12 years, it expires. There's legislation that says you have to within a year. So now you got to put a mask back on. So I'll be like, no, I got my shit. No. I'll get a fake ID.

What did they show you? Oh, you're going to get a fake ID. Oh, OK. I get a fake ID. OK. Until I get it again. Okay Until I get it again If I get it again Then I'll be like

Man, that's on me My bad Yeah You know And then I'll run in there And I get boosted back up But I'm good Like I was ready

To let them antibodies That I got in Miami Run it You know To work here You don't have to be vaccinated To take the private jet Between gigs

For the tour It's vaccinated only, baby Wow So if you want to be on a PJ You got to be vaccinated You got to show a card Delta Delta on Delta, bro That's what I'm saying Delta Spirit, baby. So if you want to be on a PJ, you got to be vaccinated. You got to show a card. Delta on Delta, bro. Delta. Spirit, baby.

Chill, chill, chill. You're talking reckless, bro. We got your platinum. You know what I mean? Still don't treat us with no respect. It's crazy how little that shit means in the end. I'm going to be getting upgraded every time. I'm like, what is this? These motherfuckers keep inventing precious metals. Yeah. Howing precious metals Yeah

Like how many precious metals we got Platinum that's it don't ruby me Fucking diamond I got delta mozanite bro I got the fake one I don't get no benefits with this I can't get sky club Silver and gold is nothing

Platinum does a little something but you gotta get that diamond I'm at the highest I still don't get upgraded I'm 1k on united which still don't get upgraded. You're not diamond, son. You're not diamond. I'm 1K on United, which is the same thing. They got silver. Gold, platinum, diamond. It's like pesos, bro. It's pesos. Oh, really? Yeah, I'm that, and I still

don't get upgraded every time. That's pesos, bro. United is a different thing. It blows my mind, bro. It's because it's United. United, you get upgraded more. Nobody care. It ain't Delta, son. I'm sorry, Platinum. I'm sorry, you little precious Platinum. Son, your boy Platinum, son. That shit is precious.

That's precious. Your boy Platinum, man. You going to be Diamond soon. I'm Diamond soon. You'll get there. You'll get there. You'll get there soon. But you're not even.

You're a K. What is that? You got a letter. Why would it go from metals to K? K. Because it's too high. There's no metals left. I'm talking about Platinum.

Diamond. Diamond. Diamond ain't got no value, dog. Come on. Fake shit. Yeah yeah you might as well have a mozanite bro you might as well have a mozanite letters have value hey i'm a thousand it's a number it's a thousand thousand one thousand oh bravo you got a thousand what diamond you get for a thousand son get a little baby little baby little diamond son

hey i got that i don't need no diamond. Diamonds. Hey, hey, hey. Ask your girl if she wants a K for her birthday. Ask your girl if she wants a K for her engagement. Absolutely, bro. Hey, hey, hey. Fuck out of here. Every kiss begins with K. Diamonds because you're so salty that fucking England just took all their diamonds. Yeah, that's right.

That's right. I know I'm not hearing this shit from a black dude. I don't know if a black dude can hear supporting diamonds, bro. I'll be honest with you. As you were saying this, I was praying you were going to get through that shit. I was stumbling, bro. I was like, he's good. He got this.

He got this. He got it. They got to have United Bitcoin. That's what I need. Y'all need something different than K. K is trash. Throw all my K members, come to the front of the plane. What is that?

I only still get United because everybody else flies Delta. I almost switched over to United when they dragged that Asian out the fucking plane, bro. I almost went with them because I was like, that's my type of airline, bro. I like when they get gully. Like when motherfuckers start disturbing some shit, drag them out. You don't like that. Drag them out. So then go to spirit because that shit happens every week. Now you imagine

the airplanes, bro. You get dragged off that shit. Nah, I wouldn't get dragged off, but they would have dragged off that motherfucker that took my seat last week. Drag that motherfucker. And picking and flicking would have been dragged off too in his shorts. I think you would't get dragged off, but they would have dragged off that motherfucker who took my seat last week. Dragged that motherfucker. And Pickett and Flickett would have been dragged off, too, in his shorts. I think you'd have been dragged off for mass policy violations. These motherfuckers ain't platinum. No, you'd have to be K. I'm platinum, dude.

No, you'd have to be K if you were on. What is K? K is stupid. I know, that is stupid. Call me something real. A K is nonsense. The only time a K is good when it's followed by two others. That was good. That was good. That was's followed by two others. That was good.

That was good. That was good. You like that? That was good. I tried to set that shit up. That's why you kept this shit going. No. I got to get this.

That shit just came to me in a moment five minutes ago. I know. Conversation's done now. All right. Let's see. That's it. We out of here? Yeah.

Three hours. Is a full shave hours is a full shave Is a full shaver cut your head and I trim no, I know I know For legs Andy Beal dog. I'm Andy. I know the games random. So you agree game could be Scary Wow, Mark's scary. We're donating.

We're donating the hair. Shaved up bald. Locks of love, bro. Your shit going to locks of love, bro. Going to a cancer award. No, no. You can't donate it. Come on. Don't do that.

I light your hair on fire. I light your hair on fire. In front of a cancer award. You should donate it to Indians. So now they have your hair. Oh, yeah. Yeah. You see?

Yeah, we don't want that nappy shit, but we'll take it. That's the fucking, I mean. Finally get something for my people. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, we don't want that nabby shit We're gonna shave your fucking head bald dog are you gonna shave your legs on yeah, of course I like both I shall wax them Dude, I shit for the boy. Just so I'm ripped. Just because. Me and my girl together. This is unfair trade. This is bonding time.

You agreed to it like it is. You agreed to it. Your whole head getting shaved. No, I'm not shaving my head. I didn't say. What? I'm not shaving my head. What?

Because I'm not losing. Wait, wait, wait. Whoa, but you're adhering to that. And I'll be honest with you now. Your boy going to practice. I'm practicing. When are we doing this? When are we doing this?

I'm practicing. But no, you first have to get a win or a few wins before you can play me. I'm not shaving my head, though. You are shaving your head. You can't do that. You can't do that. If he don't shave, he gonna sleep on tour. He gonna sleep on tour.

It will be shaved. Whether you like it or not, it will be shaved. You can't ask Ben. Are you guys familiar with the banker andy beal there's a book called the banker and the suicide king i read back in a day and it was about this banker that uh shut the fuck up thank you thank you jeez just have it that was gonna shut the fuck up so there all right this book uh andy beal was this banker in Texas and like he was actually the first guy to like privatize space travel in the US. And then NASA just outbid him for work shit.

Like he found a way to put satellites up for cheaper. And then NASA was like, no, we'll just make it even cheaper. Just to fuck him over. But he found a way to do it. And he liked to play poker. And what he figured was that the professional poker players were better than him. But if he could raise the stakes enough

to where they would get nervous, he could beat them in poker. So he got all the best poker players and he was sitting down for super high stakes poker and he was able to compete and sometimes beat these guys and he would have these different monitors

that monitored his heartbeat and shit like that and monitored any ticks that he would have to make sure that he would not play the game any differently. But he knew he was so rich that once it got into, I don't know what the- Millions of dollars or whatever for him. Exactly, once it got to millions of dollars, these guys' lives were on the line and his wasn't.

He was going to be okay. And that's the stakes that I had to raise with you. I knew you didn't want that hair to go, Samson, but it's going. Okay? Wow. I actually won't lose it. I don't think I'll lose it. Your hair?

I hope you don't. I love that hair, but I can't lose it. I can't lose it. No, son. It's beautiful. I feel the confidence. That hair is great. I feel the confidence waning in him so hard.

But the hair is beautiful, man. It's great, dude. It looks amazing, bro. I do not want to see his box head after that. Dude, his shave. Remember him back in the day? He's going to be like, Yeah, son.

Bro, take your hat off right now, bro. Show me your hair, dog. Show me your gummy worms. No, take your gummy worms, bro. Let me see your gummy worms, bro. For real, dog. We're going to turn you into John Cena, bro. I'm going to turn your ass into John Cena, dog.

I'm going to rub your legs, bro. You're going to be completely buzzed. I'm going to rub your legs. I'm fine if you shave my legs I've been waiting for my legs to be shaved I actually probably shave it all the way up to my becker and shit I'll just go I'll just dip myself into like a nair bath and then just let all the hair fall right off of me I'll be the happiest man in the world but your hair my dick might be on fire but your hair gone I'm gonna make sure we put it on something and we're gonna leave it here It's like you've been beheaded. You've been scalped.

I'll be hotter, bro. This is payback for the Native Americans, dog. This is payback for the Native Americans. To make me hotter? How's that payback? You can spit it whatever way you want. Are you kidding me? I'm about to be so much hotter.

You're looking like the front of a Viking ship. There's no way. I'm going to be way hotter. I pull my shit back anyway. I'm about to be so much hotter. With that fucking forehead, dog, you're looking like the front of a Viking ship. I did. There's no way. I'm going to be way hotter. If I pull my shit back anyway, I'm going to look way hotter. I'm close. You'll see. It ain't going to grow back the same.

I know. Why not? You're going to have to get on the keeps and shit. Once you shave your hair at this age, it doesn't grow back the same. Yeah. What do you mean?

I'm holding on to this. The moment this goes, you're going to see stars. What makes you think we're the same age, bro? You're 10 years older than me talking about the same age. We'll see when your shit is shaved and you're going to see Star. What makes you think we're the same age, bro? You're 10 years older than me. Talk about the same age. We'll see when your shit is shaven.

You're going to look like you're 50, son. Watch. I know. I'm going to look way younger. He just keeps saying shaven, and it's throwing me off. This might be the best thing. I'm going to see when your shit is shaven. Isn't it just shaved?

Are they shaven? Clean shaven, maybe. I've never heard just shaven. Yeah. I don't know. I just went into shaving this shit. It's going to be so good. Ass've never heard just shaven. Yeah. I don't know. I just went into shaving. It's going to be so good. Asshole Army, we love you.

We appreciate you. We'll see you on Patreon. Patreon.com slash flagrant2, man. We love y'all. We appreciate y'all. Peace.