Andrew Schulz's Flagrant with Akaash Singh - Give Scientists AIDS!

Episode Date: May 19, 2020

This week Andrew Schulz, Akaash Singh, AlexxMedia and Mark Gagnon discuss Tekashi 6ix9ine crying about Billboard, how Schulz caused the Call Her Daddy-Barstool break up, scientists need to get AIDS, Lebron admits Jordan is better, how Schulz felt his dad's meat in the womb and much more. INDULGE! Want an extra episode a week? Join the Flagrant Army www.Patreon.com/FLAGRANT2

Oh I bought a dog yesterday we recorded. I guess we can record. Yeah I bought a dog dogs are expensive as shit. I thought you got out of that. I did I got back in it last night Wait, you bought a dog. I bought a dog. We're recording. Yeah, we're what kind of dog say what what kind of dog? So it's a yellow one I Did I got a yellow one? Yeah recording yeah we're recording what kind of dog say what what kind of dog so it's a uh uh yellow one i did i got a yellow one yeah yeah yellow one's a good one yellow one's a good one a little golden is he a golden dude i got to go i saw there's a golden doodle lives in our apartment

swear to god this guy can open doors really Really? He, like, jumps up, pushes down on the handle. It's crazy. It's the most incredible thing ever. They're brilliant. He's got it. Bro. And then, you know, we have a dog currently, right? Her dog, which I don't acknowledge.

Now I understand why I can't just adopt some chick's kids. You know what I'm saying? Like, you know these motherfuckers that, like, combine families, and you got to treat this other dude's fucking kid like your kid? Yeah. I already am looking At this other dog Like the second he don't come

When I say he come I'm like Hi You about to see Motherfucker You about to see Yo You ready for a dog yo

You gotta walk him Say what It's a boy or a girl I don't know It's a dog What the fuck does it matter You know what I'm saying Did you name it

I said Say what Did you name it Chicken Oh my god Oh man A man adopted a dog Is a bit You know what I'm saying? Did you name it? I said, say what? Did you name it? Chicken. Oh, my God. A man adopting a dog is a bit. Y'all can't handle this shit. I can't handle it.

No, my agreement with my girlfriend is she has to do everything for the dog. And I was like, how's the agreement? And then she gets a dog. But then she's going to have to go back to work soon. Say again? She's going to go back to work and still soon say again she's gonna go back to work soon she better figure that out that's her responsibility it's my responsibility to come back and nurture the dog and hug the dog i already i'm gonna break every fucking rule with the dog she's like you know we have to crate it at night i'm like it's sleeping in the bed with me yeah yeah but it's gonna shit in the bed early on if you don't create you got

to potty train it first before he whose responsibility is that oh gosh did i not line that out already yeah no i know but you can't just have it in the bed right away why not shit's in the bed then it's not gonna shit when you're getting cuddled you can't shit when you're getting cuddled you can get big too how big you can get um i don't know we haven't decided i figure that's on us right like his weight is on you his height is not Right? His weight is on you. His height is not. Say again? His weight is on you.

All right, so we might have a little Manu Bolden Doodle. We might have a Manu Bolden Doodle, dog. Just some tall and skinny Golden Doodle. I feel like you're not very supportive of this dog thing that I got. I feel like you're not supporting the dog. The dog's not here yet. It's two weeks old. Okay?

Yeah. And then it has to be eight weeks. Yeah weeks because you got to get that shit vaccinated. Mark, how do you feel about that? We ain't talking about gagging on you. Nobody hates about vaccinating animals, huh, Mark? Enjoy your autistic dog, idiot. Yo, that'd be lit, though. Good luck opening doors and archives and fill them, dude.

I don't need it to open doors. Dogs are kind of autistic, right? A little bit, yeah. Yeah. No, they're all emotion. Say again? All they are is happiness and love. They're the opposite, right?

Isn't it autistic? You don't have emotion? So could you vaccinate somebody that has no emotion and get them? What if you vaccinate an autistic? What if you vaccinate me, bro? Like maybe my girl's like, I think you need some aluminum, bro. Why are you so cold about everything? Real talk, maybe I need some more vaccinations.

But what if you vaccinate an autist? You think that could... If you double down, like... That could be the vaccine for autism. You multiply negative numbers. You add a little bit more into them. I'm into... I mean, listen.

It's two negative numbers. It doesn't hurt to try. We act like we can't experiment with them. Like, let's experiment. I'm serious.. I'm into them. I mean, listen. It's two negative numbers. It doesn't hurt to try. We act like we can't experiment with them. Like, let's experiment. I'm serious. Let's experiment. It's like, how long are you going to be the fucking manager of the basketball team? Get out there.

This guy's 36 years old, playing the last game of the season, hitting a three, and everybody going crazy. We know you're going to hit the three. You've been doing this for 40 fucking years. Right? Like, I'm not wrong? How long are you going to do it? Son.

Akash? What up? Anyway, talking about- Isn't it crazy that we made a movie about Rudy and he basically just did the same shit we let every autistic kid do in a fucking high school basketball game is get out there at the end of the season and play a couple plays? Akash? We got a fucking Disney movie about this?

Akash? Football is very different. You're putting people at risk. When you let a retard run out there oh he'll do damn good maybe rudy's a fucking retard maybe he's really a retard dude i remember watching that movie everybody's like how do you get the sack i'm like how do you and that little retard heard hike you and it just went after it right push it off the tackle with one arm son yeah fumble sounds like the only word they can pronounce hey you ready for dinner fumble fumble oh my god but seriously when we're talking about want to talk about vaccinations and such mark is like mr

fucking 4chan he's Mr. Reddit right everything is a conspiracy this motherfucker I told you before the podcast got blue pilled this week this entire week he's like oh I listened to an interview with Ezra Klein about body positivity and the thing about Vox Vox really

makes a lot of sense with their journals I remember saying this defending Mark bro Lizzo is brave okay like i don't see i don't know i think maybe we were i was a little egregious and believe in some things okay what things what he is so sleep dog this guy is so sleep dead ass before the pot and this is what made andrew tell me is he was like yo man i watched a documentary on the moon landing and that made me think we did it like I changed my mind about it

I didn't believe it before on everything I've believed my whole life I flipped it on okay I believe that 9-11 was an outside job I believe that we did go to the moon

and I believe black people should be able to vote so like the things I held as core values I flipped an outside job is funny, though. Yeah, dude.

Okay, so you're totally blue-pilled out. Outside job is just funny. That's a little bit called calling Akash's parents for tech advice, bro. Man, that was a long sentence. I know. I felt it. You know what? Keep shooting. Keep shooting. was a long set up. I know. I felt it.

You know what? Keep shooting. Keep shooting. You're on a roll. Don't let one miss take you on the fucking roll. We're going to put you

in last game of the season. I'm Rudy, bro. That ball was just going around and around and around. Time was still. Bro,

I'm full-blown Rudy. I've been in that situation where you know you fumbled it and you just try to plow through the look like you got fucking tennis rackets on your sneakers in the snow I lose confidence you see my shoulders slump midway through the delivery and I'm just like ah fuck

man it's just like Akash's parents immigrated to the country and opened up at 7-Eleven son and I wanted

to give it up because you were on fire yo bang bang one more time hit him with it one more time we got it

you just listen too much Ezra Klein you get less funny that's what happens what's that sideinfeld shit? Da-ling-ding-ding-ding-ding-ding. What are you doing?

That's a different theme song though. What's the Seinfeld? That's the Boy Meets World theme song, I'm pretty sure. What's the Seinfeld? Isn't that the Boy Meets World? That's been his week. It's Boy Meets World, bro. I'm trying to expose him.

Wait a minute. Da-ling-ding-ding. How do you do Seinfeld? Bro, that's fucking. That's 100% Boy Meets World. That's the Twix commercials. Wait a minute. No, I think.

Bro, you did deliverance, bro. Say what? That's deliverance, bro. That is Boy Meets World. So I got a dog. That's what's up. My girl got a cool little project you know everything's kind of cool you know what's the over and under for when the first dog is out of there oh asa let's say three weeks no we gotta wait till quarantine is over because they're gonna

have to give it back to i told my girlfriend i said i'm supportive of us having both dogs i think this is i think this is cool I think we'll find a way to figure everything out obviously But if the old dog bites my new dog I'm gonna flush it down the door Now it's your new dog? It's my dog It's not both of your dogs?

As far as I'm concerned I pay for the dog Oh my god son So the dog is mine You know what I'm saying? the dog is mine bro oh my god yo the dog is mine bro i do i'm not gonna lie we had a good week yo we had a good week what else my dick like found his way out my hole of my boxers like when we were kind of like making out yeah so my girl thought that like she goes she goes she goes oh she goes she goes damn i got it why i was like why she goes

i just made your dick undo your boxers and come out like like it snuck out through the hole she's literally turning into you ain't that some you shit to say damn i got it i'm fire y'all She's literally turning into you Ain't that some you shit to say? Damn I got it I'm fire yo She's at home right now She's at home right now Like I be getting these dudes Hard

I be getting these dudes Hard So fucking Hard Real talk But wait what dudes though? You're getting these dudes. So fucking hard. Real talk. But wait, what dudes though? I'm not you, son.

I'm not you. All right. All right. Yo, I'm a jealous motherfucker, bro. I see that. You know how jealous I am? She got a little crush on one of these Formula One drivers in this documentary watch. And I'd be wishing that motherfucker crashes every single race, bro. Every single

time he hits a turn, I'm like, accelerate Carlos Sainz! Accelerate! Fuck you! I'd be trying to act like that shit is cool when they say somebody's cute and inside, I'm like, you out of your fucking minds? I'm right here! Tell that shit to your friends!

I'm trying to fight fire with fire because there's another formula one driver this mad cute his name is charles leclerc yeah right and uh he he drives for ferrari and uh it's a cute ass company cute ass company and um so she talks about carl sainz and i'm like i'm like yeah but that's charles though charles kind of fire right and i'm like yo we got like, yeah, but that's Charles, though. Charles got a fire. Right. And I'm like, yo, we got to be team Ferrari because I'm trying to get her away from Carl's. Right. It's like, yo, we team Ferrari.

Charles, that's my boy. You know what I mean? And that's the best team. Right. Yeah. You know who switched teams and went to Ferrari next fucking year? Carlos motherfucking signs. If this guy don't die in a goddamn car accident soon, bro.

He really tried to break up my relationship you really want him to die bro say what you really want him to die maim maim I'll get he could get maimed

oh my god yeah maim is different you can get maimed you can get maimed take a roof for a maiming and you're gonna rub it into your girl say what

you're gonna rub it in when he fucking I'm gonna say look what you did I'm gonna say look what you did. I'm going to say, look what you did to this man. He didn't deserve it. You know what I'm saying?

Mark, bro, I be affecting the world, yo. That's a lot, dude. Son, I'm not going to lie, guys. Sometimes I affect the world in a greater way. You know what I mean? By maiming Formula One drivers? I mean, indirectly. I have an indirect connection to the greater world in a lot of different lot of different ways yeah babe you wanted a crush this is a crush

why is it deliverance every time. Wait, was that not it? That was a deliverance. Yeah, yeah. How does it go? Oh, it's got to be more, what's that? That shit is fire, yo. God, that's fire. Bro, I didn't know you were on. Yo, play it from the beginning. Act like that shit didn't drop.

I didn't know that Al was playing that off the computer. I just saw you reach towards the mic, and then the shit came out perfect. I was like, what the fuck is this? There's Michael Winslow over here. You feel dumb. Michael Winslow. Police Academy.

That shit is fire, yo. Yo, Jews got soul, bro. Yo, yo. Jews got soul, bro. Careful, Mark. Jews got soul. No, I got blue-pilled.

That's right. You won it. You won it, bro. All right. Oh, did he tell you he spoke to a seed yesterday? Yeah, he's been talking to him. Yeah. Oh, you guys stayed friends?

I'm the liaison to the community. But how do you communicate? What do you mean? I thought they can't have smartphones. Yeah, no. Oh, you're not texting them? No. They can't have smartphones? I just see them. I just see them in the. Oh, you're not texting them? No. They can't have smartphones?

I just see them. I just see them in the street. Are you fucking honest with these people? Yeah. Well, no, yeah. They're kind of. Wait, so you just wait on the street for them? Like, did you speak to them more than once?

I think I did. How do you think? I mean, bro, how can you know? I think it's the same guy. Oh, you thought it might have been a different one? I'm not sure, but I think it's the same guy. They can't be upset about that. They're the Chinese of white people.

Yo, but. Ooh. Yo, real talk. Real talk talk i think you're right but like and they can't be upset about because they're like chinese people can't help the fact that they look so similar right right but excuse me same hair same coat they're trying to look exactly it's like the law that you have to look similar. Right. Yeah. Oh, God. That burp really threw off the fucking momentum. Paying to ask burp, right? Like, we were fucking moving right there.

You know what I'm saying? Come on, dog. Happy Hanukkah, right? Like, what happened with that burp? What do you think they thought burps were back in the day? Or did they not have them because they didn't have Pepsi? What's the deal with burps? Trash!

That's actually a good point because you got to think if people were sneezing, they said bless you because they thought the demon was coming out. Okay, so what'd they say if you burped? I don't know. It's an interesting discussion. You know where this started? In a Seinfeld-like bit. Yeah, it did.

But it all leads to. Son. Oh, what were we talking about yesterday? Oh, that shit was funny. Oh, yeah. Yo, he got so pissed. He was talking yesterday. Wait, hold on. What are we talking about?

Hold on. What's up? Hey, hey, hey. Hey, hold on now, Mr. Blue Pill. He was like, what was the motherfucker? He was hot-ass dude. No, so he was talking yesterday. He goes, you know, blah, blah, blah, yada, on now, Mr. Blue Pill. He was the most exposed motherfucker. This hot ass dude. No. So he was talking history. He goes, you know, blah, blah, blah, yada, yada, yada, right?

I was like, you know what that's from? And he just goes, yo, shut the fuck up. No, no, no, no. I never said that. You made that up. Double dipping is apparently from Seinfeld. Like the tongue. Man, come on, Seinfeld.

Stop. You can't double dip the chips. Stop it, bud. Double dipping is, I double dip. Nah, nah. The mouth is the cleanest part of a dog Yeah but you never said it He coined the phrase

You really think he's the first person He coined the phrase He brought that shit into the Zeitgeist Modern Shakespeare bro Real fucking talky yo Real fucking talky Y'all need to really chill out

Cause you're starting to trigger me You're starting to get me. You're starting to trigger me. You're starting to get me upset. You know who invented Trigger? The Germans? No, I'm just kidding. No, no. Okay.

No, this is what we were talking about because he was obviously talking to the Hasids, right? Hasidic community. The Hasidic community is pretty close to where Mark lives or you live like what, next to it? They manage my building. They manage your building, right? And this building this building and a lot of buildings they manage the buildings okay so um and corona apparently like ravaged the hasidic community right right and um

yeah we were talking about how like of you know of course it affected them more deeply because you know one of the the telltale signs you have corona is you can't taste or smell food right and you know how do they know yeah like i don't know if you've had their food but yeah there's no way to know you have corona yeah you're just eating fucking matzo ball soup and it tastes the same as it always has this hot water tastes like hot water i guess yeah there's not that much i was talking to al about matzo ball soup yesterday ain't that some jewish shit to convince you this cheap ass shit is something you can serve at a diner wait wait it's just broth and a piece of fucking dough and they're like hey soup eat that it's the cheapest thing you could possibly make me it is broth and dough that's what the

matzo ball is this whole time i thought it was a meatball. Yeah, matzo's meat. Ain't that some Jewish shit to do? What? Make you think it's meat when it's really just a piece of fucking dough? Whoa, dude. Save a lot of money. You're not thinking it's so crazy right there, dude. Whoa, dude.

What are the Jews focused on? Bro, we might have to circumcise this part of the episode. This shit is getting a little bit serious, bro. God, okay? Sometimes they're filled with meat, but sometimes they're just bread ah it's like a dumpling or just like jewish women sometimes they're filled with meat bro y'all never fucking just plow through it so just plow through it Marcus Contagious

that's all around that fucking blue pill we got a fucking blue pill okay guys we got good topics hold on we got some good shit to talk about oh that's what I want to talk about

there is we got to give some respect because there's a content creator out there that i never understood his greatness in the content creating sphere i respected him for making a an incredible uh company and uh tapping into a need, especially in the sports world, but also like the cultural world and doubling down on it and building this company. And I really respected him as a businessman for that. But I never understood him as like an elite content creator, even though all the people that worked with him were like, nah, trust me, this dude is legit. I just didn't see it yet. And we fuck with the people that work for him. Yeah, 100%. A lot of friends over over there love everything that's going on obviously

i'm holding um what is the term it's called you got to hide the eight ball or some shit like that who cares whatever so obviously we're talking about dave portnoy at barstool and i really only saw the pizza reviews and everybody's like yo this guy's a fucking genius and i'm like it's just pizza i don't get it i never really cared um this week or the last couple weeks apparently the quote-unquote old portnoy the way that he used to do things right has been brought back he has done two things in the past week that are absolutely unbelievable yeah unbelievable i The second one, I don't know. We'll go through the second one, but the first one, I mean, unbelievable, raw content creation,

like Trump level usage of the internet, inspiring, fun, and seeing him do these two things justifies all the success of Barstool. Now, of course, you need to hire amazing people to work with you at Barstool and build up a company,

but one, recognizing their talent to create, but also creating on your own and it was fucking unreal first is the goodell thing yes roger goodell is the commissioner of the nfl longtime beef with many uh you know patriots fans uh portnoy every fan hates him yeah every player hates him and but would you say more so even patriots fans because of yes because of deflating and and he suspended tom brady kind of unfairly honestly because he was they should have been punished more harshly a few years ago for videotaping other people's practices and he like was kind of light on that and everybody was coming down on him other owners who's the only people he cares about were like what the fuck there's such a light punishment. So when Tom Brady was accused of deflating football

so he could throw them better in a playoff game, he came down on Tom Brady like probably too hard. There was no real proof. He might have did it. You can't really get him on it, but he gave him four games suspended.

Huge suspension. I hate him. Yeah. Basically, there is a charity event that everybody is kind of donating different things towards. Yes. All in. All in.

And I guess it's to raise money for... I think a coronavirus researcher. Some sort of coronavirus thing. I don't even know where the money goes. Where does it go? It's just a weird... Whatever. It doesn't matter.

But everybody's doing the right thing. And Goodell has this longtime beef with Portnoy. He kicked Portnoy out of the Super Bowl, I believe, one year. Yeah. Like had him handcuffed and removed from the Super Bowl. Huge beef. I mean, they've been selling like all these t-shirts that mock Goodell. This has like been a longtime thing.

Yeah. So Goodell sells or auctions off for this all-in challenge, a night of watching Mondayay night football with him in his man cave right portnoy buys it for a quarter million dollars and then releases this amazing promo video i don't know if we can play it because i don't want the thing to get flagged but i'm sure if you guys just look on twitter instagram you'll find this um this video his instagram is uh i think el presidente or bar president i think el presidente or barcelona president or something like that amazing video now everybody were like dying to see them in the same room together i'm sure he's gonna have a camera there maybe gadel won't happen or maybe

gadel will back out on the deal which would be even better i mean he's put but goodell in a corner and goodell is never used to be in a corner because it's like if you don't do this you don't want those kids or the people that need the help to get a quarter million and a quarter million dollars to eat dinner with roger goodell who seems like one of the most boring unlikable people on the face of the earth i can't imagine the second highest bid was anywhere close to that so let's say the second highest bid is fifty thousand dollars which still seems kind of crazy. You're going to cost charity $200,000 because you don't like this guy? If you're Goodell, wouldn't you just bid a little more?

He said, he's like, I don't know how I got away with this. I don't know how they didn't catch on to the fact that it was me. Yeah. I don't know how that happened. That's what Dave Portnoy said. Like, I don't know how the fuck they let this slide through the cracks, but I got it. So until they pull the rug, I'm'm gonna ask him everything I've been wanting to ask him for all these years amazing love it so this week another brilliant piece of content

creation and this is more like along the wrestling sphere uh there is a podcast called call her daddy right call her daddy at one point became like the number one podcast in america now number ones are tricky because they're algorithmic based so they judge how fast you accelerate right in other words if you're a brand new podcast a lot of times you can jump to number one because not a lot of people were listening to you and then now you have let's say 100 listeners going from zero to 100 is super fast acceleration. Going from 90 to 100 is not that fast acceleration. So you're not going to get the same thing. That being said, listened to by a lot of people.

It was on Barstool Sports. The girls that did it were these two girls that just talk about like sucking dick and fucking and like, you know, fingering turkeys and all that kind of shit. And it's one of like the girl whore podcast very popular genre of um podcast um they get into some beef with barstool which i'm kind of the reason for no i am kind of the reason for it. Did we talk about this whole thing? I told you guys earlier.

I told you guys earlier. I told you guys earlier. I'm kind of the reason for it. We'll get to that later, but you break down what's going on. Okay, so in short, basically, Portnoy finds these two girls as they're starting the podcast. He's like, all right, I'll take a chance on you. I'll give you guys the thing. So they start doing the podcast independently. He's like i'll take a chance on you i'll give you guys the thing so like they started doing the podcast independently he's like all right i'll pay you

guys money and they get a sign on a three-year contract they're making half a million a year plus like merch and all the other stuff so they're not getting paid nothing yeah so they're making half a million a year they're doing the thing after one year they're like all right we want to renegotiate the contract we're not happy with this they want like the ip for the show they want more money they want all this stuff portland was like no we're not going to do it but what who pushed them to do that so this wasn't found out till later but like as like the time goes on they're like trying to renegotiate more and more and then basically it's found out that sophia the brown hair girl is dating this guy

peter nelson i think this h HBO exec. And he is now shopping. He's shopping their podcast around to different places trying to get more money for it. So he goes to Wondery and they're like, all right, we'll give you more money for the podcast. They're signed to a three-year contract and they're trying to break the contract. And basically they just stopped doing these episodes

for like five weeks and cost them a bunch of money. So they stopped doing the episodes for five weeks. Obviously had like you know pre-existing ads uh they maybe chalked it up to corona dave portnoy offers him a few more deals crazy deal like very lucrative deals he's like yo i'll cut you guys loose six months early you can have the ip like no one gets the ip and he was that's the thing we got offered a deal very early and the the money was dog shit, but my main issue was they fuck you at the beginning of all these deals. The IP is ours is what they always try to say. If you sign that deal, you're a fucking retard.

You have to keep your IP. That's just what it is. So for them to give it back, Dave to give that back, he really did not have to. No. I own your entire podcast. I could swap you out. It don't matter.

I'll cut you loose, and I'll give you everything. That's generous. I want to talk about. It don't matter. I'll cut you loose and I'll give you everything. Yeah. That's generous. I want to talk about the IP thing in a second. But yeah, they said no to the deal. They still want to go somewhere else. Yeah. Right. And again, I don't know all like the nuance bullshit.

I'm sure they're back and forth. Portnoy goes on their feed. Yeah. Because he has access to their feed and drops an episode where he explains everything that's going on on their feed that's so brilliant the feed of the you know number one podcast yes in the country right right they can't access their feed they're locked out of their feed well here's why i think that's so brilliant because we've all been in a situation where somebody can control a narrative and you're kind of outside of it and he can go on his ig but now he's on you now he's now he's telling his side

of the story to the same people that have only been getting your side of the story right and it's so petty that most of us wouldn't do it but i respect anybody so much when they do do that i love it oh god so he breaks that down etc and eventually i guess communications break down so then i think barstool goes all right fuck it you guys are locked out we have you for three years we own your ip we own the ip i don't know how deep their contract is maybe it's so deep that they're not even allowed to podcast if it's not through barstool yeah who knows that's my question because like but we'll get to we'll get to the ip discussion in a second i just want to go back to why I'm the cause of all this. So anyway,

so let's back up. I don't know. Over a year ago, definitely over a year ago, doing my girl a year. So definitely over a year ago, way over a year ago. So this is what happens.

I match with a girl on this dating site called Raya, right? Cute chick, brunette, attractive, right? We talk a little back and forth. We're texting. Everything's cool. She asked or I asked, one of us asked, maybe it's me, I don't know, to like, let's hang out. We agree to go hang out a certain day. I think it's Tuesday.

Who knows? Doesn't matter. Yeah. To like, let's hang out. Or we agree to go hang out a certain day. I think it's Tuesday. Who knows? Doesn't matter. Go, okay, let's go hang out. It's like seven o'clock on a Tuesday. And I'm like feeling really comfortable on my couch. And I'm just like, I started watching maybe a game. I think there's a game coming on. And I was like, you know what?

I haven't watched a fucking game in a long time. And I've been working so fucking hard. I just want to like sit down and chill tonight so I text her hey I can't do it tonight I'm sorry my bad to you know cancel on you this late that's on me I'll make it up to you something like that but I just wanted to fucking watch the game I didn't want to go on a fucking date right on the rest I want to rest I'm a tired guy yeah you know not to mention i knew i was going to be my soulmate in the future so it's not like what am i doing with this time right now so apparently this is what i hear she's like in full makeup ready to go really pissed off so she calls this guy who's been hitting her up non-stop but she's been ignoring like crazy that works at HBO.

And is this executive named Peter Nelson? They meet up, they go on a date, things link up. It's beautiful. They're in love. They find their soulmates. You're welcome.

Right? He gets in her ear about the success of the podcast and all of a sudden tells her, yo, you got this a year later. You got to leave Barstool. They're taking advantage of you, et cetera. Basically, I caused it.

She had the... No. Basically, I caused it. You know like in the Ice Age movies where like there's that little fucking rat running around. He pushes the acorn in the ice shelf and then it kind of breaks? Yeah.

I'm that. You know what's interesting is you normally want... I'm the acorn and the little rat. You normally want credit for good and the little rat you normally want credit for good things yeah right now you want credit for destroying two careers wait a minute wait a minute wait a minute i want credit for portnoy's great content you're welcome portnoy how do you rate this pizza but isn't that crazy that's super small world right obviously i'm being sarcastic

i did not cause this or anything like that crazy how hilarious is it crazy coincidence like in the small podcasting world that already exists in new york yeah that this crazy event could somehow be tied back to us yeah like directly it's not that indirect no absolutely it's crazy it is a very small world that's a crazy sequence of events this exec is a loser it's all adding up now how is reality different if you decide to not watch the game and you go on the date i probably have an hbo special by now that guy owes you a special maybe i gotta stop fucking all these execs girls but you didn't

you cancelled on her no I didn't do it you don't cancel on her he doesn't meet his soulmate HBO should love you in all seriousness it's very easy not to have sex

with executive girls because they're gay no no but they are gay right I love independent Andrew they're all too I love Indie Drew

they're all gay or girls. Oh, I heard like every exec at Comedy Central got fired last week. I mean, what the fuck? Checking off the list. Oh, man, I don't want to dance on nobody's grave, but that's what you get you stupid ass Bitches

Alright guys now you got it You don't want to dance on the grave Hit it alright guys Hit that shit bro Let's dance on the grave Let's dance on I can't do it I can't do it

Do we have space back here in the water? Nah, bro. Nah, bro. It's not enough. You need space. I need real estate for my shit, yo. Here's your gravestones. Here's your gravestones.

You ready? Come on. Come on. Here's your gravestones. Here's your gravestones. Here's your gravestones. Hey! Hey! I can't do it. I'll just drink a margarita. Oh, boy.

Oh, y'all don't know. We can flag for this shit. Oh, fuck. Listen, here's what it is. Hey, why don't you put that back up? Maybe it'll be inspiring to all these unemployedemployed network execs You know what I mean Maybe make a show on your own You fucking dorks

Can y'all see it Oh man Can y'all see it Can y'all see that Can y'all see that It's all good It's all good Oh no big deal

Oh man No big deal Just three of us broke your entire business That's fine It's all good just three people just took it like this we well i just hurt my neck right there dude you think their necks are gonna be hurt when they're looking for fucking shots

yo can you stress your neck out from going like this too hard no but for real i hurt my neck right there that's a pinch i got a pinch Yo, can you stress your neck out from going like this too hard? No, but for real, I hurt my neck right there. That shit pinch. I got a pinch, bro. Oh, man. I got a pinch. Oh, fuck.

Oh, man. You think their necks are gonna hurt when they're looking up at the building where they used to live because they're fucking homeless? Yo, real talk. Sleep in the street, be fucking with your neck, dog. No bullshit. That shit be fucking with your neck dog no snow bullshit

that shit be fucking with your neck oh man bro oh fuck do you know what i mean but no no no in all seriousness in all seriousness it'll be easy to get another job because they have so many hits under their belt you know what i mean like 100 i mean like just tell them you brought them whatever's fucking hey hey honey one name specific shows but we know all right okay oh sorry you want me to fill the air right there should we try to sign call her daddy you think oh dude that's the move do you want to know what's crazy no so uh what what what i don't know i actually imagine they have a stock contract because i signed a shitty deal once they have a stock contract that is we own everything you can't do shit without us and then if you sign that without having somebody look at it you're

probably fucked so i imagine that's yeah that's that's a conversation i want to have and we kind of had this conversation the other day yeah but so ip is really interesting ip i believe is shit on your chin brother you got it's just glistening i can't all right there you go oh my bad am i shining so uh hold on a second um that was my girl texting me you see what i did right there you see that phone get flipped real question yo my bad man hey my bad i'm gonna call you i'm doing a pod i'm doing a pod i was just about to ask you how long ago did she stop listening to the podcast today you must have just realized she's confident talking she's

listening bro she's listening to past shit i did too man because i because i i i'm 100 sure i actually i don't know i don't know i was telling her about the whole Barstool thing with Call Her Daddy last night. Yeah. And I said something, and I was like, yeah, there's this weird connection, actually. Like, I don't know. Like, apparently, I was supposed to go on this date, blah, blah, blah. Oh, you fucked up. And then she goes like this.

She goes, oh, I know. You said you're actually dating some Brazilian girl. I listened to some sports podcast you were on a long time ago. I was like, yo, this chick has done some inspecting. You have really gotten into the thick of it. That's a problem, bro. Yo, they be getting into the thick, yo. She's getting into the thick of it.

Oh, bro. Should we call her ass? Should we call her ass, bro? Yo, I was like, yesterday she hit me with a fucking, she hit me with, you know how I do bop, bop, bop? Yeah. She motherfucking bop, bop, bop me in a different way. I'm telling you, she turned into you, yo.

Son, but it was different the way she said it. Yeah. She was like, shut the fuck up. I was like, all right. That works. That's a different way of doing it. All right, all right. Back to what we were saying.

Intellectual property, IP. I feel like past episodes and the name of the show are unimportant for character-driven shows. Right. In other words, if, say, someone else owned Flagrant 2. Yeah. If we left that show called Flagrant 2 and started another podcast called The New Flagrant 2, my suspicion is that 99.9% of the people that listen to the podcast do not listen for the title.

They listen for Akash Singh, Andrew Schultz. 100 right alex media mark gagnon right so if we left you could keep that intellectual property you don't have the value of the of the show with a podcast with a uh a show like who wants to be a millionaire yeah you can remove the host and put a new host in that can still be successful. With a show like The Morning Show, et cetera. But podcasts specifically, right? This type of podcast where we're sharing our lives and it's basically we're all kicking it,

hanging out, having some coffee or drinking some beers. You're with your homies when you listen to this podcast. You can hang out with your homies wherever they go. Now, one of those podcasts where it's like, this is how people get murdered. You could slide whatever NPR chick out and put a new one in, and they'll be fine. Those, you need to retain IP. Something like us, I dare you to try to negotiate over IP with us.

I sold a web series a long time ago, and then the contract that I didn't have anybody look over was like, you can't even make some shit like this if it's not us. But that one's really interesting because even though you're the star of that show, they could on Viv you. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Right? And they could throw,

what if they got even more famous Indian at the moment and put them in that position, like an Aziz or whatever like that. You need to secure yourself as part of it yeah but with this we are the show not the name but they were saying if i did a different like if i did a web series with the same cast and just call it something different they'd be like that's too similar yes and so that's why i wonder if the call her daddy girls do their own podcast same girl same topics that could be too similar so that's a different wonder if the Call Her Daddy girls do their own podcast, same girl, same

topics, that could be too similar. So that's a different- If it's that kind of contract. That's a different thing than intellectual property. That's likeness rights. Okay. I believe. Okay.

That makes sense. And that is another thing that's really important because it's like, yo, we want to do a podcast with you. Yeah. And how can we secure, and we're going to pay you all this money. We're going to guarantee you all this money for a podcast. If you just go do another podcast, that's exactly the same.

Why would people pay money to do ours? Our whole thing with paying you money is we're going to leverage all that audience you have into selling ads. Yeah. If you have another podcast they can listen to, then we can't leverage it as well. That makes sense. So if they're like,

yo, you can't do another sucking dick, a finger in a Turkey podcast, which might be the case, those girls are fucked. I mean, what are they going to talk about? Getting canceled on a date? That'd be a great episode. That might be a good episode.

Do you know what I'm saying? But no, for real, if that's what they did, and I imagine that's what they did, I think it's a wrap. I think it's a wrap, think it's right but i can see how upset they are i can't believe hbo ain't fucking with you man this guy owes you hbo exec you owe andrew schultz man what's his name found you your fucking wife yo peter nelson you about to be fired bro you know what's so weird what no that's the name of my lawyer in sweden peter nelson you go hey bro not i'll be

helping peter nelson's bro yeah you'll be helping peter nelson that's his name sir peter nelson really yeah holy shit that's wild that's small world shit too oh my gosh because i've been looking for him to try to get that video but why is it that peter nelsons can't do it without me? Why is it do you think Peter Nelsons can't do it without the kid? You're so much funnier with this Kramer hair you got right now. Ain't he so much funnier with Kramer hair? Way funnier. Kramer be taking credit for all kinds of shit too? Boy, boy, I'm telling you on fire right now, dog.

Keep the hair up. Keep the hair, yo. You're on fire right now, dog. Keep the hair up. Keep the hair, yo. You're exactly like Kramer, dude. Postman. What is his name? You can't even Kramer well. What's his name? Newman.

You can't. You can't. We got to teach you how to Kramer, yo. You can't Kramer well, son. Postman. Do the bit that he did at the Laugh Factory. What? You can't We gotta teach you How to Kramer You can't Kramer well Ghost man Do the bit that he did At the Laugh Factory Which

That was one of my favorite ones Come on Mark The shower's not running bro You mean Mark's favorite bit Mark you recited that shit bro This shit is so funny Yo remember when you Used to say that bit all the time? Wait, which one?

Remember when you said your neighbors were so loud and you started doing your favorite Kramer bit? I didn't say neighbors. There's another word that started with N and ended with RS. Come on, bro. Love your N words, dog. Oh, fuck. Guys. the end of the end with rs love your n words dog oh fuck guys guys oh my god okay no seriously peter nelson yo andrew also if you're looking to hire it's a bunch of comedy central motherfuckers looking for work right now ain't got shit to do real talk now. Ain't got shit to do. Real talk. Now, we shouldn't...

There's one thing we learned from the Jordan documentary. It's we shouldn't... What is it called? Celebrate... What is it called? Other people's failures? Just now,

coming to that realization? Well, I was gonna... The past 20 minutes? I was gonna undercut it. God damn, man. What you doing? You can't see Andrew I've been feeling so bad.

Like, there's such bad karma, son. We don't feel bad, son. Get the fuck up, man. That is bad karma, son. You mean dancing? What the fuck? We didn't dance? Hey, hey.

Come on, come on, come on. Salsa on that shit, yo. Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey. OK, we got it. I'm not playing around. I named salsa because it's a food and y'all probably about to go hungry you broke motherfuckers or unemployed ass bitches I'm just saying I'm just saying

I'm just saying I'm just saying Andrew is dancing with his YouTube plaques just having a life raft you should get used to that oh fuck oh boy anyway we don't want no smoke bro because we just love that jordan documentary it's exactly what jordan would have done okay just keep it a buck um but you didn't wrap up what happened in terms of the HBO situation. So can they bring their show to HBO?

I think it's at a stalemate. Mark, do we know anything? Yeah, I'm not sure what the particulars are. I think they're like renegotiation, trying to bring the blonde girl back. But I think the brown hair girl is like done. She's out. I think she got her meal ticket. She don't need to work.

Could be renegotiated, though. I don't know. If there's money to be made people find a way to make money um i think what portnoy probably should have done is just taken a piece moving forward if he knows they're not coming back to barstool and he's willing to sever that relationship then you go look we built you guys up i want a piece of this show moving forward give me 15 you can do whatever the fuck you want in perpetuity i want 15 i think it's on some principle shit like look i offered to let you out of the deal early i will give you back

your ip you guys signed this deal and it wasn't a shitty deal the ip thing was stupid they signed off on yeah but 500 000 a year that's not nothing yo it's a lot of people that starting off with love 500 000 a year they weren't number one when they signed, were they? No, no, no, not at all. That's a lucrative concept. I just don't understand. I do not understand why people want to listen to girls talk about sucking dick on the internet when they can watch girls suck dick on the internet.

That's a valid ass point. Why do we care about whore podcasts? And this is not a knock a wheezy in that because honestly, I do think horror podcasts are stupid, but I think hers is aimed more at like exposing these like weird kinks and like sexual fetishes. And they're funny people.

And I'm not defending it because it's my friend. But as far as these other girls go, it's just like, how do you suck dick? How do you finger a turkey? Like I try to listen to some of this shit. If it's the number one podcast,

they definitely talk about more than they're. They're stunning. They're really hot girls. The hot of the girls talking about the sluttier shit is going to win. Hot girl sluts always wins. Never loses. Go on Instagram right now. See who has the most followers.

I guarantee you. Hot girl slut. Of course. Guarantee. I give guys. I give guys. We fuck credit. They were. Guarantee. I give Guys We Fuck credit. They were the first ones, and I think they did it interestingly. I give Wheezy credit because I think she's funny,

Mandy's funny, but the idea of now the 12th Whore Podcast is like, all right, man. I guess maybe they're really funny, but I don't know. If they're really hot, I just assume they're not funny. I'm not saying I'm right, but that's the assumption we all make when we see a hot girl.

We're not like, oh, she's funny and hilarious. You see a super hot guy. I don't think Cristiano Ronaldo is hilarious by any means. I don't think he has any personality. He's got the most followers on Instagram, bro. Say what? He's got the most followers on Instagram. And he'd be showing them fucking abs and them thighs and them quads.

It ain't for his sense of humor. It ain't for his sense of humor? do you know a single joke that he's told not a one shit this was one joke i'll be there when my twins are born that's one of his great jokes motherfucker got goals to score anyway sluts there's an opening for you uh talking about fucking on the Internet. I guess people need their their horror podcast. You know, how do you really feel about that? What?

The slutty podcast. Again, I feel like the first couple, I get it. That's great. Whatever. But at a certain point, it's like there's a lot of these. Right. At a certain point, one of y'all need to get married, yo, and be happy. and be happy.

Nah, for real, because like, it's a lot of single ladies upset they ain't in a relationship giving girls advice about how to be like them. That's why they listen, though. I understand, but like,

at a certain point in time, it's like, oh my God, are we perpetuating the same thing that's making us miserable? Yeah, but you don't know that

in the moment. Well, come on now. Yeah. I need one of like the slut podcasters to like be, be you know what wheezy and them would take over the game if they just got into relationships and were happy have families and kids and they just kept their like sex positive pocket all that kind of shit because it would be aspirational you be like yo you can be a whore and have a family say again best of both worlds best of both worlds and you could actually lead me to something promising now not everybody wants to have kids that's fair the majority of people do yeah this idea like assuming somebody wants to have kids is crazy it's like get the fuck out of here it's like

you're fucking yeah you don't want to have some kids yeah and even if you don't think you want to have kids when you're older you're gonna be like damn i wish i had some fucking kids i had i get it there's a weird disconnect and maybe maybe I'm like, maybe I'm wrong. But I feel like everybody who believes in evolution to say those people who that subset is like, oh, I don't ever want to have kids. Well, that's the whole purpose of evolution is because we want to have kids. You're saying like it's a super liberal belief to completely and unapologetically accept evolution.

Yeah, and anybody who doesn't is an idiot. Anybody who doesn't is an idiot and is also a completely liberal belief to go, I don't want children. I never want kids. And that is antithetical to evolution. The entire point of evolution is we all want to procreate and that's how evolution happens.

That's like the basic number one thing. Everybody's goal is to procreate and pass your genes on on every species on the entire planet that's what it is that's how species work right it's like adapt or die comedy central yo you know who's not going to be creating anything is you fucking network execs we can't make any shows right now you contentless fucks all right we're gonna take a break for a second because i gotta tell you guys something one of the most painful things to to fucking purchase is um the essentials men's essentials, socks, underwear, tees, hoodie, these types of things, right? The basic things that we're going to wear, that we wear more than anything else.

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I love saying this. Yes. I, I, I love six, nine as a comedian, actually, in the same way that I love Donald Trump yesterday. I love 6ix9ine as a comedian, actually, in the same way that I love Donald Trump as a comedian. Exactly. Like, if I separate the politics from Trump and I separate his position, I just look at him as a content creator. He's funny, dude. It's like Portnoy.

So funny. Yeah, it's hilarious. And it actually gets heightened by the importance of his job. So this guy who's the president of the free world, the most powerful position in the world is posting memes?

Like it's hilarious. Posting memes, a picture, this fucking homepage is Joe Biden. Like I don't know what to do. Like it's just, all of it is so funny.

So funny. So I love, as a comedian, I love that. As a politician, we don't agree with him, but we can separate it. Yeah.

And there might be things I agree with. I'm not like a monolithic in my beliefs about anything, but 100%, there's things that are critical. That was a great sentence. Did I kill that shit? That's a great sentence, yo. A million subscribers.

So basically, 6ix9ine comes out of prison. He's got the whole snitch thing, which I don't fucking care about. I'm not from the streets. The code is an interesting thing to me. It's cool to watch in shows, but if anybody fucks my girl tries to kill me i don't have any loyalty what to you whatsoever i'll snitch the second i'm threatened there we go second you threaten my girl's in the room is anybody else in the apartment she in the room right now high and under the bed do i look like i would last in prison you expect me to respect a

code fuck that all y'all going down. You might last. They keep you around. Cute ass. Cute ass motherfucker. They were trying to keep me around. I still wouldn't last. Do you kill yourself? I get worn out, yo.

I get broken. You break me. So 6ix9ine comes back, drops a song, Gooba. It goes fucking crazy. Hundreds of millions of views, all this kind of stuff. drops a song gooba it goes fucking crazy hundreds of millions of views all this kind of stuff um he starts instagram some things about uh how billboard might fuck him over and might steal the number one song from him number one song on the billboard charts or whatever it is the chart thing uh and then he goes on this fucking instagram tirade talking about oh my god

ariana grande and jess and bieber Bieber are buying songs or they're buying this and they're inflating the views and they're inflating the listens and they're inflating the streams and inflating the purchases. And he just starts crying like a little bitch on Instagram. And it's so unbecoming. It's like, we get it. You're heartbroken. The funny thing about you is you make fun of yourself, right? And you clown other people.

When you're taking shit seriously and like emotionally rattled and shaking over number one on Billboard, when you're supposed to be Mr. I don't give a fuck. I'll just tattoo Brooklyn on my forehead. I'll just tattoo a rose on my cheek. I'll just tattoo six nines. I don't care about anything. I don't care what nobody thinks about me. Well, Billboard's going to give you number two.

But they bought it with the credit card. They used six credit cards to buy it. Right? Just crying like a little bitch. And it takes away all the cool. Yeah. He couldn't just thug it out or use his same humor that he did so effectively. When anybody called him a snitch, he used the humor. When Snoop Dog anybody called him a snitch he used the humor

yep when snoop dogg called him a snitch yeah he goes he posts this thing that i thought was genius i you know the biggest thing i missed when i was in prison was friday night movies and he's got like some popcorn or some shit he's standing like six inches away from the tv right i don't know if they have that they maybe took it down but he's staying six inches away from the tv and he's watching suge knight talk about Snoop Dogg and saying Snoop Dogg was a snitch, basically. Oh, wow. It's like, why did Snoop Dogg never go to jail?

You know, he got a murder trial, and then he got off. He got caught with all that weed. He got off. When people get off with a lot of shit, it's probably because they're an informant. But he never said shit. He let Suge say it. Right, right, right.

And he's just sitting there in front of it like a kid. He's going, huh. It's funny. It's so funny. That's how you handle the billboard situation. You don't get in your feelings. We don't want to see 6ix9ine in your feelings. Tekashi 6ix9ine shouldn't have a number one song.

You're even better without the number one. Yeah, yeah. Like, who cares? We don't care. We like you as a comedian. You're better as an underdog. Yes. Tekashi 6ix9ine on top is not as fun.

Exactly. It's not. It's not. We want you pissing off the people on top. Yeah. We want you nipping at their heels. Great. We want you being an underdog.

And I guess, you know, he wanted something really badly. He didn't get it. He got sensitive. But man, is he unlikable as sensitive? Like really talking in the camera. It's like if you look at an apple and then it's a red apple. And then all of a sudden it's not an apple. Is that what he said?

Son, it is so fucking pathetic, bro. It's like he jumped into a metaphor and didn't know the end of the metaphor. Hey, what do they say about apples and oranges? What do they say? It's both fruit, but it's's not if you want a red apple bruh bruh it was so bad yeah and he looked like he was gonna cry and it's like come on man the fuck up dude be what do what is successful for you i can't call you a genius of social media right one week and then you just have this like massive flop the next week. Yeah.

Cause I put them up there with Trump in terms of the way he navigates social media. Trump does get sensitive though. And maybe it's just, let me keep the eyes on me. However it's happening. I got to keep eyes on me. And maybe it's interesting and more dynamic if I'm not always,

always, always a troll. Maybe seeing me go through emotional highs. And I'm not saying he's not feeling any of it. I'm listening. But maybe it's like, all right, well let me lean into this sadness because it's like

i just need people to watch me if i'm melting down people are watching if i'm explaining i'm a snitch everybody's watching but how do i keep people let me have a meltdown about their billboard numbers let me do some other shit next week he's just gonna find something to stay relevant so you think he's calculating this like you said the the currency of him and trump is that people are watching you it's attention grab attention how can i grab attention but that's my value sensitive but he'll shoot back he never just like cries like i'm not he'll say stupid shit like oh this fake that's bullshit doesn't i have the biggest hands yeah like he'll just make up some bullshit to fight back but he doesn't't just be like, oh, they're being unfair.

He doesn't cry. He actually goes on the offensive. Yeah. That's what 6ix9ine did. He went on the defensive, and that's what made him look like a bitch, right? Trump will go on the offensive, right? He'll go, if this was the billboard situation with Trump, he'd actually attack billboard, right?

Billboard is fake. The billboard is fake the whole thing is fake and then six not tried to do that but then all of a sudden he's copping please oh look there's six different accounts six credit cards bought the thing and all the views and his screenshots and showing all this is trump ain't showing those screenshots yeah you're just going you're fake you're fake news just call your fake you're fake we all know the truth and then you post one picture of the amount of views that Ariana and Justin's video got and one picture

of the amount of views your video got who's number one done yeah not crying and explaining let me show you this powerpoint

he gave us a powerpoint you can't be a gangster with face tattoos you giving powerpoint yeah nah but look at this is what a stream is this is what a buy is

this is get the fuck out of here bro maybe he was tech support for his gang for his circle maybe that's what he did real talk how he rolls the top he understood the internet the best i'm just i was so disappointed i think he's still so disappointed i think he's still gonna win but but i do think maybe there is value in holding attention this week we're talking about six nine complaining last week obviously the snitching shit yeah now we're talking about this and then next week will be something else but he's not going to go two weeks without giving you something to talk

about because then the second you stop talking about him he's done yeah yeah i mean yeah 100 our piece this week was about the value of holding attention exactly that's what i'm speaking to so okay yeah to that point if i want to hold attention here's the here's the thing to do it this week yeah i just think there's a better way to hold the attention like i think again i haven't looked at the podcast that portnoy dropped but all the social media that he dropped around the caller daddy girls was not explanation it was just comedy yeah like he posts this one video of like uh do you have the video yeah can we play yeah i think we could ah fuck the audio might fuck up but it's on his twitter feed but every image it's like his face plastered on it these like iconic movie images yeah and he is lifting them up in the other words like he made them so it's like that ice skating movie of will

farrell and uh what's his name dynamite napoleon heater or something like that yeah yeah so he's like picking them up he's picking them up like. He did all the heavy lifting with Call Her Daddy, essentially, which is great. That's how you do it. Yeah, yeah. Have some fun with Billboard. Right. You know what it was? Tekashi really wanted that Billboard.

The great thing about Tekashi in The Breakfast Club or on Angie Martinez or any interview is he didn't give a fuck if he was there. Right. And we love watching people who don't give a fuck about things that we care about it's the best it's the best and you know what he thought he had it in a bag he really wanted it he was about to be like yeah i came right out of prison i got a number one single and then it was taken away from him and that shit fucking hurt and i get it but the way you handle it is with the same humor that got you here keep that shit in the tub we were actually talking

about this a couple days ago like celebrities getting sensitive is always especially if you're known to be funny it's always a mad off-putting like what are you doing this for yeah even if it's like for like positive shit like like when you're accepting an award and you like make it serious you're like yeah we gotta like stop milking cows or whatever that fucking pussy said what's his name the joker yeah joaquin phoenix yeah why are we milking cows it's like first of all nobody drinks regular milk anymore you idiot it's the easiest cause to like support everybody's drinking oat milk malcolm at malcolm damien what is it called malcolm gladwell malcolm gladwell milk you know what i mean that tip not damien

right it's like the dairy industry is actually flopping right now because nobody's using it it's like stop acting like you're coming here to save the fucking day you're like america in world war ii yeah it's like y'all done fighting it i'll accept crazy shit from him because i think he's just crazy and that's the kind of actor he is but yeah the rest of these guys come on you i think that's his greatest asset is he convinced motherfuckers he's crazy when he's not like if you can convince people you're a weirdo they'll believe the weird shit you do johnny depp is supposedly this weird crazy guy and then his girlfriend tells him what what to do he's like okay amber heard he's just some cucked little i don't think he said okay

that's not her allegations at least say again uh she didn't accuse him ever just saying okay whatever you say i think it was a lot of okays until he was finally like, bitch, stop it. Slow down, bitch. It wasn't okay, baby. Okay, bitch. There's a few okay babies until you get to okay, bitch. Right? How many okay babies you got before you're like, yo, be honest. How many? I have a line that my girl, I think, is starting to realize.

I just go, she's nagging a lot. I just look at her. And then she goes, what? And I just go, you're doing a lot right now. There we at her, and then she goes, what? And I just go, you're doing a lot right now. There we go. That's what I'll say. And that's my like,

hey, that's enough. That's the limit. Yeah, yeah. Exactly. Everybody got a limit. What's he supposed to do?

Hop in the Jack Sparrow? Yo, if, but if, here's what I'll say. If you have convinced me you're crazy and you maintain the character, he's been going on a decade now

of just like, we think this guy's out of his fucking mind. That's the prestige. You, hey, you deserve it. I'll give you maintain the character he's been going on a decade now of just like we think this guy's out of his fucking that's the prestige you hey you deserve it i'll give you all the credit that's artistic in and of itself that's that's the fucking what magicians do like these david blaine is probably not that weird what's the other guy rock and roll david blaine chris angel chris angel is not that weird right but they're not that weird but they have to lean into the weird so they can do this magical thing and we believe it more coming from a weird person like if we look at david blaine like you know this guy don't talk and he's just odd and he like kind of stares into space like it's like uh

one of those uh comics that pretends to be autistic the weirder they are on stage the more they get out of their one-liner jokes yeah because we start to go wait a minute is that who that guy is but i can respect the commitment. Oh, 100% respect the commitment. So I'll give you credit as if you are that because you are so fucking good at pretending. Yup. Hey, more credit, more power to you. Son, real talk is wrestling. It's a character like wrestling.

Yo, Nate McIntosh, funny comic, always says, he's been saying this for like, even before Trump, everything is wrestling. And then the more you think about it, you're like, yo, everything is just wrestling. Politics is wrestling. Comedy is wrestling. 6ix9ine is wrestling. Like all of it all of it is wrestling you all just want to be entertained and wrestling is character building narrative yeah that kind of stuff yeah 100 100 percent uh all right what mark oh um okay let's move on to something we got some topics that we have to

talk about today uh akash what you want to start with? There were some fun sports hypotheticals, I thought. There's one that I think is interesting that Kendrick Perkins tweeted. He said, basically, who would you rather have on your squad, or who would you have, Reggie Miller or Klay Thompson? I want to get to that one,

but can we just talk about what LeBron said about MJ? Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. So during this entire last dance, you haven't heard a peep out of LeBron James about Michael Jordan. Yeah. Okay? Yeah.

All of a sudden, LeBron comes out and says, I would have been a great teammate to Michael Jordan. To Michael Jordan. Yeah. If that isn't the admission

Yeah. that Michael Jordan is the GOAT, Yeah. then I don't know what is. He's basically saying, I could be Scotty. He didn't go,

Mike would be a great teammate of mine, or we would play great together. Yeah. I would be a great teammate to him. Yeah. He essentially said, I would compliment his skills with what I do. I'm basically better Scotty.

You are better Scotty. Which is what he is. 100%. But you don't have that dagger. Yeah. That Jordan has. And you need don't have that dagger yeah that jordan has and you need a guy with that dagger and all due respect to kairi he's a bum when he has to lead the team he got the dagger but he has a dagger he doesn't have the physicality to be kobe or jordan no but he's got the mentality he does have the mentality yes he has that brain and it's just

interesting to see him admit it maybe Maybe he was manipulated by the documentary. Maybe he came to like this truth, this actual feeling of, oh man, I know how great I am, but that is true raw greatness. A level that I don't have, a gear that I don't have. Can you click the link, Al? Because I think he even specifically says something about Jordan being a killer. And if you're saying he's a killer, you're not saying, yo, I'm the killer. You're saying he's the killer.

Careful if it's YouTube, though. No, no, there's an article. Okay. What does he say? Me personally here, just me personally, the way I play the game, team first, I feel like my best assets work perfectly with Mike. Mike is an assassin when it comes to playing a game

of basketball, scoring the way he scored the ball, ball my ability to pass my ability to read the game and plays uh game read the game plays and plays and plays in advance i don't know what that exactly means but yeah in other words um mike is an assassin mike is an assassin now maybe he just now that i'm rereading maybe he just meant that in like he's a scorer he'll just go out there and kill but to me i also read that as like that's the killer i'll pass i'll make the right basketball play mike will go win yeah 100 and i think that you would be a great asset to him just like lebron is a great asset to no matter what team he's on yeah uh but you're not going to be the alpha of that team and you're not going to be the best player on that why do you're not going to be the best player on that team. Why do you think he said this? I think he realized it, yo.

Yeah. And I think that, like, LeBron is actually really savvy with social and with all the interviews he does, and I think he's trying to be the bigger man. Like, I think it would be really easy in this moment to, like, puff his chest and go, nah, I'm great. But if he actually comes out and goes, man, Jordan is just so amazing. What an amazing player.

Like, and doesn't say that he's better than Jordan. It actually looks better on LeBron. And then LeBron fans, I think, start coming to LeBron's aid and going, listen, you have to understand LeBron is a better team player and it's a team sport, so therefore he's better. Let your fans do all the talking for you in this situation because

what is called recency bias is kicking in. Yeah. When it comes from the last dance, like nobody's going to say that anybody's close to michael jordan for the next six months at least nobody's gonna say and then after a while we're gonna see lebron do some crazy shit and go man he might be see but that's why i'm surprised he for him to put this out because now everybody can always go back to this quote and be like look he admitted it right here that is the problem that is the problem with tend to forget though. I feel he should have just left it out there.

What I've realized is I've gotten older maybe just because we have so much more shit now. Everybody forgets everything. Like people are going to forget this. Unless it's brought back up. I think what Al's talking about, which is a really important point, which is like anything that you're quoted saying,

you will be held accountable forever. Yep. And you have to be really careful in podcasts and especially written interviews because they will go to that quote. Like we just went to that quote. And they will hold you to that quote for the rest of your life. So you might think if you're LeBron when you retire at 40, maybe you win a couple more rings or whatever.

You might think, you know what? No, I did enough. I'm better than MJ. But motherfuckers go up to you and be like, you said you'd be a great teammate to him. They won't even tell you. They'll just write an article about it. Even LeBron admits it. That's what we're doing

right now. We're like, LeBron admits he's not as great as Jordan. I feel like you can always maneuver out of that somehow and be whatever. I think what happens

is you exist within your vacuum. So to your fans, you can explain whatever you want. How do you explain things to your detractors is difficult

because your detractors will use everything you say that fits their narrative against you and you don't have access to your detractors is difficult because your detractors will use everything you say that fits their narrative against you and you don't have access to your detractors. The interesting thing about like 6ix9ine and Trump

is they actually have access to their detractors in so much of Floyd Mayweather where it was like the haters and the lovers listen and watch at the same time. Tommy Lahren.

Yep. To a certain extent, yep. I wouldn certain extent, yep. I wouldn't say as much. I don't think she's brilliant, but to this day, I feel like if Tommy Lahren, if we don't hate,

retweet Tommy Lahren and insult her, she doesn't reach that many people. Oh, 100%. She used black, I said it on Brilliant Idiots. I was like,

she uses black Twitter. Like, black Twitter is her biggest PR. She says something purposely to enrage them. They retweet everything and now she's vacant. That's how I'm tying them to Tekashi and Trump. I think same kind of thing. Yeah. She says something purposely to enrage them. They retweet everything. And now she's big. That's how I'm tying them to Takashi and Trump.

I think same kind of thing. Yeah. We didn't constantly hate Trump at the beginning and talk about how we hated Trump and the things he was saying. I don't think he had a one on election. Here's the thing about Tommy. There's nothing redeeming about her for the detractors where the people who hate Trump undeniably find him funny i'm talking about

friends of mine who are audible about their hate yeah posting things all the time about how much they hate him private text messages you know the guy's hilarious yeah he's the goat goat it's always going to be a private text message though 100 private text but like there's never a private text message about tommy going now she has some bars she's funny she's hilarious there's nothing redeeming like she's not charismatic she's not charming she just regurgitates yeah conservative talking points in a space that doesn't allow those talking points to be out there and looks like the most hateable version of the person saying it because she won't win like white girl so you won't win like them. Blue-eyed white girl.

Say again. She won't win like Tekashi, like Trump on the same level, but that's how she won is hate and using detractors. I would say she's not wrestling enough. Yeah.

She's like too much politics. Yeah, yeah. She needs more character. I think she was thinking Fox News the whole time and that's it. Say again. I think her goal

this whole time is let me get off the blaze or whatever the fuck Fox News and then I'm good. 100% 100% Yeah

Yeah like Candice Owens is a little bit more wrestling than Tommy is like Candice will say the wild shit on purpose to troll

and lean into like the second Corona came out she was like open a country and we're like this bitch is not closed yet right?

She's like well it's gonna close just keep it open right? It's like, well, it's going to close. Just keep it open. Right? It's like she is on it with the wrestling. She understands the value of the wrestling. There.

But yeah, I think this is telling for LeBron. I think it's, this is what it is, man. I think we all forgot what Jordan was. And then I think in 30 years, even if there wasn't a documentary to look back at everything they did, you'd have been like, oh, Jordan's better. 100%. But this just brought it into the current conversation. Because LeBron knows that he can't decide if a team wins or loses, and Jordan could.

LeBron knows he can't just make a decision, boom. Yeah. Right? Jordan could do that, or at least that's what the documentary showed. And I don't think people fear LeBron in the way they feared Jordan. I think that you could. Dude, didn't Draymond, like, what did Draymond do to LeBron? What do they feared Jordan. I think that you could, dude, didn't Draymond like, what did Draymond do to LeBron?

What do you mean? They get physical? Remember they had some shit? Oh, he punched LeBron in the nuts. And this is brilliant on LeBron, savvy. He stepped over Draymond, which is, you know, never disrespectful.

Draymond punches him in the nuts. I think LeBron like kind of overacted about it and then brought it up in the post game. Like, yeah, you know, I hate this. This is such a passive-aggressive thing. But he's like, you know, I'm going to do what I've always done and be the bigger person and not talk about it, but you're talking about it. But that shit worked, man.

That shit got Draymond thrown out, and that's how he won. But again, they won not because it got LeBron so angry that he was going to come and shut Draymond up the next day. Jordan would have just been like, no, we'll deal with it. LeBron so angry that he was going to come and shut Draymond up the next day. Yeah. Jordan would have just been like, nah, we'll deal with it. Yeah. Jordan would have been in the fucking locker room with his bat and a cigar like, oh, remember that motherfucker hit me in the nuts?

Remember? LeBron is like snitching to the media about it. Let's put it this way. LeBron, we talked about the block, right? Jordan's last championship against the Jazz. We don't even mention the steal. He go first to lay up, then the next time down, the steal, then no timeout, dribbles it down court, hits the jumper.

He is the last 45 seconds of the game. We only talk about the block to give LeBron a little credit. Yeah, it was cool that you closed the distance and blocked it. It's not that important in the grand scheme of things. Kyrie hit a fadeaway three-pointer on a kind of step to the side in Steph's face. Kyrie's shot was super impressive. The block, if you rewatch it, you're like, I rewatched the game one time randomly

and it was just fucking impressive. Yeah, the block is. And it's a tie game and they got an easy layup and at that point you're down two, which Kyrie still could have won the game on a three. But it's a very different game if you are, let's say they hit that two, Kyrie hits a three. If you're Golden State down one,

that's a different thing than down three. Down three, the only option is Steph or Klay take the three. That's it. Yeah, something LeBron said on Uninterrupted as well. He was like- Sorry, sorry to interrupt. Oh. They were down one.

It's a tie game, I believe, and then Iguodala gets blocked. So if he makes that easy layup, then the Cavs are down one. It's a tie game, I believe. And then Iguodala gets blocked. So if he makes that easy layup, then the Cavs are down two. Let's say Kyrie hits a three. Are you sure it's a tie game? I'm pretty sure it's a tie game. Can we look at that?

It was a tie game for a long time, I remember. I want to look at that because... Before Kyrie's three, I remember it was a tie game for a long time. Just look final score. Oh, they went by three. Steph had a three at the end. Kevin Love played the best defense of his

life and steph didn't hit the three that's right kevin love played it oh yeah the stop yo yeah the stop yeah yeah oh that's right that's right he got the iso and kev love played great fucking d on it yeah and the block like re-watching it he comes out of fucking nowhere so it was a tie game because of the block it was a tie game because of the block it was a tie game because of the block so in other words they would have won no matter what but i'm not being down one at the end of a game of course things change of course things in what i'm trying to say is we inflate the value of the block because it's lebron right if it was james jones that blocked that shot it's not part of history just like kevin loves lockdown d of steph curry

has slowly been forgotten yeah we inflate stars if steve carr hits the last shot of jordan's career we it's like hey that's crazy steve carr hit that whatever so we inflate the stars and we inflate the value of that block because the reality of the matter is if he hits that layup or gets fouled hits of free throws and then kairi still hits a, they still win. It doesn't matter. And it was tied. It was tied. So it's not like great block, but it's, yeah. Yeah. And also now I realize, God, I thought that they were up.

It's so funny. Now I realize why it's not that crazy that he took that step to the side three. He didn't have that much to lose. Yeah. It was a tie game. I thought they were down one. See, that's also a different thing. If they're down two, maybe Kyrie still probably shoots a three, to but it's a it's a much different shot yeah yeah but it's a

different and to be honest Kyrie's mentality maybe he hits that three he's got that mentality yeah but as much as I hate on him that's a fact but it's a different thing down two than tie game taking a three you know I mean like it all changes but Jordan layup yeah easy two, steal, off, not his defender, come help, bang, and then hit the jumper. He is the entire last 45 seconds. Al, you were about to say something? Oh, just something else that LeBron said during that uninterrupted interview where he was like, during the 2011 lockout, he was going to play football for the Cowboys. I have it in the topics list for the Cowboys.

He contemplated. He has a contract still that Jerry Jones sent him. So the NBA lockout happened in 2011. And LeBron was contemplating playing football. His trainer or somebody was in his ear like, yo, you could be a fucking tight end. You should go do this. I mean, I could not think of anything more idiotic

than LeBron James risking hundreds of millions of dollars to play a season of football. I mean, all it would take is one injury that could affect your legacy as an NBA player. Stop acting like you were going to fucking play LeBron. There's no way in fucking hell you were going to play football. You're right, but as a Cowboy fan, I'm like, yeah, but come on. Son, if they said that they were going to do it, you know what, but as a Cowboy fan, I'm like, yeah, but come on. It's on time.

If they said that they were going to do it, you know what I mean? Like 100%, I get where you're coming from. You're like, man, what could have been, right? What could have been. You know, every time I see Steph hit a three, I'm like, why didn't we draft him, right? 100%. That being said, I cannot fathom that LeBron, who has set out this legacy of being the greatest player ever and wanting to

win all these championships and wanting to change his family's lives and change communities with the money that he could make from the nba i cannot fathom he would risk all of that to play a single season of football yeah he would i mean it's just yeah there's no fucking way you never even considered it when he retired though he should go he should go to a training camp just because. He's not going to be good, but just go to a training camp, just suit up. It'll be fun. You have nothing to lose at this point. I could just imagine him flopping in football.

I realize, oh shit, where I can get the call. Throw the flag. You think baseball is the safest crossover sport for an athlete? Gotta be. That or golf. Oh, golf. I think if Jordan was good if jordan was good golf is all year i don't know if golf has like a like an off like a long off season so i think it's hard to play oh yeah because there's all these different tournaments but i

mean you could decide when you want to play or not ah yeah you're saying like just do like one off okay okay tony romo tried to i said twice to again i said twice to tony romo tried to qualify for events while he's playing with the cowboys and what happened did he see a putty cat and then he couldn't he didn't see one he didn't he didn't tony tall he tony tall did he tony tall thought I saw a pootie cat I did y'all we gonna take a break for a second man

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See what Radix is doing? All the good things. Support RadixRemedies.com. Use the promo code FLAGRANT for your 10% discount. Now let's get back to the show. All right. Combo that we initially started with, and then we got a little derailed with the MJ LeBron comparison,

was who would you rather have on your team, Reggie Miller or Klay Thompson? Yeah. That was a discussion that was happening. It was on Twitter. Yeah. And it's a really interesting discussion because there are these two knockdown shooters.

Knockdown. I think it depends what role I want them for. Let's say you're starting a team. Starting a team, who do I build the team around? Yeah, who do you build the team around? Reggie. Reggie, I agree with that. Reggie's the number one that you can build around. I don't think Klay can be your number one and you win. Not saying that he's not a killer, not saying that he's not an amazing player. I just think he is a more amazing role player. He's a 10 out of 10 role player. He's like an eight out of 10 number one. Or 8.5 out of 10 number one guy.

He might be an 11 out of 10 role player. One of the best number twos of all time. He is the ideal lockdown defender. We'll see how the knee holds up and knock down three point shooter. He is the ideal role player. You want to talk about who would play well with Jordan. You want to talk about who would play well with Jordan.

Every time Jordan goes to the basket, dishes, knock down. Who would be a better number two? I think Pippen would still be a better number two. Pippen maybe for the passing. Facilitating. For facilitating, especially in the triangle, right? Because I think the taller players played much more of a role in distributing the ball. Didn't even know that.

But Jordan isn't necessarily the best facilitator. You need a facilitator, Jordan, and Klay. Yeah, yeah. I'm with you on that. So I think Pippen's a better number two for him. But you said this before, and I cannot think of a better person for LeBron. His ideal number two is Klay. He doesn't have to mark up the other team's best player and then he's got a guy he can dribble penetrate and then a fucking assassin is just waiting yeah yeah but if i'm

starting a team i think i go with reggie miller this is real true alpha male yeah killer i mean he doesn't have maybe all the jordan mentality in him but he's got like 90 maybe i think he's real fucking close mentally he's just physically not the same yeah i mean he's built like a fucking lima bean and then jordan is built like a fucking like a basketball god yeah reggie miller is just he's whatever talent he had in this jordan maximized it too but so did reggie yeah reggie did i don't think he had the whatever talent he had, and Jordan maximized it too, but so did Reggie. Yeah, Reggie did. I don't think he had the same talent.

The guy couldn't really leap crazy. No, he didn't have any jumping ability. I mean, he was long. He had a couple nice dunks. But he could dunk off of the length. It wasn't off of sheer athleticism. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Whereas Jordan could dunk off of both.

I mean, he's just the perfect basketball specimen. Well, he was the perfect one until we saw LeBon james you know even then lebron is like a football player playing basketball yeah but you had to design a basketball player he would look like jordan i think they play jordan i think like jordan i think we will i think we would probably do that because we're kind of grandfathered into our views of what a basketball player is but as the game has evolved seeing these fours that can shoot threes and seeing them playing you know all five positions and how important that is on all these defensive switches like and we have to understand

like lebron is what 34 years old yeah do you remember like 28 year old lebron 26 year old lebron that was crazy just bouncing around like he's a point guard but he's six eight two hundred plus pounds i remember him with the heat maybe it was the second time they went to the finals or maybe it was the year after that. It was just like, what the fuck? He was guarding all five positions. What is going on? So things have changed a little bit.

But yeah, I would definitely go Reggie if he was the person I was building a team around just because he is that fucking leader. I don't see Clay as a leader. Is that disrespectful to say i think if he was a leader he'd be leading yeah you know like i i but i think one of clay's most amazing assets is his ability to accept the role and excel within it he is egoless man and you know how that that is more rare definitely as rare i would say as that jordan

mentality not as jordan yeah i would say being egoless is more rare than being uh the team leader 100 wanting to be the team leader is everybody 100 there's very few people who are fucking skilled yes probably could be a team leader yes but say let me swallow all my ego and just do this that is even pippin tried but he couldn't when he was the guy he fucking ate it up yep that is that is the most amazing quality that that clay has and maybe it's easier when you're on a team with someone that has a very similar skill set as yours but it's not as good like maybe he has to look at steph every day and go that guy's a better shooter than me i know i I'm great at shooting. He's better. Okay, I can be his beta. I can accept that because of the specific thing

we both do, he does better. You know, we don't give Steve Kerr enough credit for it. When he got hired to be the Warriors coach, they were ready to ship Klay Thompson for Kevin Love. And he kept him. And Kerr was like, no, I want Klay. I want to do some things with Klay. And then Klay became one of the best defenders in the league and his knockdown shooter.. And Kerr was like, no, I want Klay. I want to do some things with Klay. And then Klay became one of the best defenders in the league and his knockdown shooter. If Steve Kerr doesn't coach that team, and maybe Mark Jackson lets that trade happen, maybe, or whatever coach comes in.

That's a big difference. You're not winning a championship with Kevin Love. Yeah, I don't know if you're winning. Well, I mean, he got one. He got one, but you had LeBron, and you had the squad around him. And Kevin Love can shoot threes, bro. It'd be a different type of thing. I agree with you.

It's, I wouldn't say it's so black and white as to say no champion. I'm just saying the fact that you have that perimeter defender and Draymond is huge. Yeah. So you can, whatever the best guard is, Clay,

Clay can guard him and stepped in if I worry about it. Yeah. No, I hear you on that. That is interesting. It's, um, it's,

it's interesting to say that Clay's greatest quality is his lack of ego and how rare that is like where do you find i remember a buddy of mine who works in the league was telling me he liked this one player uh it was this white guy i played for the knicks i forget his name yeah they're like the just dudley no justin bieber hair it was it was recently and uh whatever he got some kind of like pseudo celebrity because he's like the white nick that has like the cool hair but he went played for west virginia i think he played the same team as uh van fleet maybe or something like that or some other player who cares point is he never was the main guy at west virginia do you remember ron baker ron baker okay he never was the main guy

at west virginia so my guy was looking at him and was thinking about signing him and actually tried to sign him, but the Knicks gave him a deal. And he said, the reason I like him is because I won't have to deal with his ego. He will come here and accept the role because he's accepted roles his entire career. At the collegiate level, accepted a role. In the NBA, obviously accepting a role. And career on the at the collegiate level accepted a role in the nba obviously accepting a role and he'll come over here and he'll accept the role when you get a guy who is the best player in his college team you have to chip away that ego if the skill isn't good enough and it's really fucking hard for people to reduce that ego and one of the

most amazing skills of a guy like steph curry is he was able to chip away at that ego and one of the most amazing skills of a guy like steph curry is he was able to chip away at that ego and reduce it when kevin durant came out yeah i think that might be the rarest quality in the nba or in any field is it the most important thing for a dynasty honestly a1a is the great player and 1b is the eaglest role player it's's 1B, dude. Or it's 1 and 1A, whatever people call that shit. It is that. Because you cannot be a dynasty without elite talent. Yes. And you cannot be a cohesive team without ego or with ego.

Right. Whoa. That's it. That's the rarest thing, it the great guys gotta have an ego and we get that the number one the killer the alpha all that get it but then the guy who's willing to swallow his ego and just be the number two and be as great as he can at being a number two like clay became a better defender i assume like you said i can't shoot like steph how can i help the team yeah let me just focus on defense yeah and then he's a fucking lockdown defender and shooter and now you got a dynasty yeah how would you judge

kawaii because kawaii is one of those assassins who's egoless kawaii is a fucking anomaly dude we're gonna look back on him i think is no there's no precedent for kawaii and i don't know if there will be another kawaii after i i i would push back on him being egoless really Really? I think Kawhi's got a lot of ego. Really? He doesn't display it? I think he doesn't display it in a traditional way. But in that he's not in the media, he's not talking to

reporters and that kind of shit. But the decisions that he chooses to make I think have a lot of ego. I mean, he went to Toronto for a year, wins a championship, and then just leaves to go to LA. That's lot of ego. I mean, he like went to Toronto for a year, wins a championship, and then just leaves to go to LA. Like that's a huge ego. Like going to Toronto and telling them when they first gets there goes,

I want to be traded, trade me to LA. I don't want to play for this team. Like that's what he said when he showed up. I don't want to play here. That's ego. You know what I mean? I guess, but he wanted to play in LA originally. But he also left the Spurs

because he couldn't have enough ego. Like he says, oh, I left because I didn't trust the training staff. No, you didn't. You left because when you're part of the Spurs, they take away your fucking ego. I heard that was a lot of Uncle Dennis in his ear. Say again? What people say is that's Uncle Dennis in his ear being like, hey, Uncle Dennis has a lot of influence and you go into L.A. If you're swayed by.

Stephen A. Smith implied some shit about Uncle Dennis, didn't he? That he got some shit to go to L. If you're swayed by- Stephen A. Smith implied some shit about Uncle Dennis, didn't he? That he got some shit to go to LA or something like that. Stephen A. Smith implied something. I think we look at Kawhi like he's borderline retarded. So we're like, oh, it must be Uncle Dennis

that's making all the decisions. But it's like, this is actually like a savvy and smart guy. And I don't know if Uncle Dennis is that savvy or smart. Right. But he's just the liaison to the team. So Kawhi don't have to deal

about that kind of shit. Like, I don't think Kawhi's trying to build build his brand i think the only thing he wants to do is win right you know i mean basically i think he told toronto that he's like yeah i'll come back but you everybody can be traded except pascal siakam or some shit like that that's ego when you tell the guys you just won a championship you tell all-star kyle lowry can be fucking shipped yeah they're all useless yeah you know what i mean like so i think we think i know i do i'll maybe agree ego is kind of driven by emotion and he seems emotionless yeah maybe not because jordan is well you know

that's what i'm saying jordan is emotional he has no remorse but he's emotional don't get confused by seams yeah right I think we're taking our expectation, our perception of Kawhi and then we're putting ego on top of that and it doesn't fit. We're like trying to put

the triangle into the square. Yeah. But if we accept that he does have ego and he is emotional and he's just not showing us, then I think it's easier to believe.

Right. Like he did go to LA and it's not because he wants to be closer to home. He was in San Antonio for years. He wants to be the fucking man. He wants to show up to practice when he wants. he wants to not play because his knees are sore like he was doing load management right he was like i'm not playing

why because my legs now it's the right decision you want to make sure your legs are good for the finals that being said you're getting paid millions of dollars motherfuckers sometimes you got to play on your sore knees yeah like the reason why he wanted everybody shipped out of toronto is because he didn't think he had enough help and he had to carry the team by himself he was making some jordan-esque demands yeah but we just see him like so we don't think that he can have this huge ego right there's ego there man i'd love him staying in toronto just to see i don't know if pascal would have gotten as good knowing kawaii's coming back but that fucking squad right now with kawaii the clippers are stacked too let's have this conversation pascal or paul george let's have the conversation yo pascal younger pascal more durable pascal who's got less ego

pascal and to credit paul george i don't think he got tons of ego, but he's going to chalk up some stupid shots. Yeah. You know, because he's, I'm Paul George. I'm going to try to mix you up and, you know, pull up a fucking fadeaway three from the corner. And you're on record saying you love his game more than any other. I love his game. Yeah.

That being said, who do I want to play with if I'm Kawhi? If I'm thinking about being one of the greats, the younger younger more durable pascal who's ascending that's interesting all these contracts are up a year after this kyle lowry will probably come back for less he probably happy here and you can maybe even trade his expiring contract for fucking god knows what because the team you know teams want to get money off their their salary so like if i think k think Kyle Lowry's deal expires next year, so it would be like $30 million a team could save by, you know,

by signing him or whatever. You could get a lot of shit for that. Right. You could build a squad. Toronto had assets. Clippers got a squad, but they traded all their assets to get Paul George. Toronto had both. Yeah.

I don't know, man. I'm looking at the stats right now, and Paul George, higher points per game, higher assists per game. It's like, don't you want to play with the player? Career for sure. Yeah, career. My thing about Pascal is he's probably going to win most improved player, and he was good last year. Yeah. So that's where I'm like, and you can't really predict this, but I'd love to see him stay just to see how it worked out.

To see what would happen. What do you think about Michael Phelps trying to kill himself what does he want to kill himself what's the whole deal i know he didn't try to kill himself guys sorry i don't want a lot of mental health but he's just like this quarantine has been tough like it's the hardest time of my life which is kind of crazy coming from a fucking the most winning olympian in history. In the history of time. Yeah. He looks like he has a hip, yeah. Yeah, everybody says he kind of looks like me,

which is quite insulting. You never want to be compared to someone who is uglier than you and objectively uglier than you. But yeah, I see the similarities a bit. But what is he saying? He just has an interview about how is he saying he's he just has an interview about how sad he is he's just struggling a lot in quarantine apparently like mentally mental health wise he feels real overwhelmed and like i don't know this is he

called espn and say hey i'm feeling depressed i'd like to share it with you guys like how does this interview even happen i don't know why is anybody checking up on him why does anybody care about the guy who doesn't swim anymore they need news man there's no sports on fam you know you're getting low on news when you call up the swimming guy who don't swim no more and ask him about his mental health and they got nothing they got nothing else i think he's giving an interview to somebody else isn't it crazy that this guy is depressed now that's what i'm saying no no no a year ago it came out he was fucking some tranny remember really i thought he was engaged no apparently he was like banging some tranny or didn't know about it look up michael phelps tranny mark can you look up michael phelps tranny

it's probably in his some girl was like alleging or some tranny was alleging they dated from the daily mail michael phelps self-proclaimed girlfriend reveals she was born a male as she describes her amazing intimacy with Olympic swimmer. Self-proclaimed girlfriend? Yeah. Damn, son. Is she the actual girlfriend? That I don't know.

Because self-proclaimed. Maybe they're not boyfriend and girlfriend. Maybe they talk on fucking Instagram. She's still a tranny. Anyway, let's keep going. Okay. maybe they're not boyfriend girlfriend maybe they talk on fucking instagram she's still training anyway let's keep going okay uh and so basically it's just this article about how he's like having depression or something what's the deal like what's going on what were you doing before that you couldn't do now i don't know you could swim in isolation it's literally what swimming is it's isolation yeah i just don't get it What was so exciting about his life that's changed?

I think the loss of the limelight. So it's not about quarantine. It's about the limelight. For a 10-year period, probably even longer, he was like- The man. The man. But even then, you only gave a fuck about him one month every four years. Swimming is so stupid, bro. Can we just talk about how stupid swimming is?

I mean, it's the best form of exercise, but as a sport. Yeah, it is. A. Is it? You know who swims every day at the local YMCA? Who? Larry Legend, your dad. He cut that shit out because it's stupid, bro.

I think that was the first thing that my dad forgot when his memories started going. He saw Michael Phelps be all sad. He was like, fuck that shit, dude. Yeah, exactly. I've become the best swimmer I can be and then I just want to be fucking whining all the time. Yeah, get out of here, dude.

No, my dad did swim. That's a fact. But he also had like four knee surgeries so that was the only way that he could do it. He used to be a marathon runner and he would do that shit in army boots

like a fucking boxer because that's what boxers used to run in. Now he got the illest bunions and the craziest nails ever so don't do that. And it kind of explains the bad the bad it's really bad don't ever do that so he had to he was forced to swim he didn't want to swim but like the swimming thing can we get rid of it can we get it out of the olympics what the hell is he thinking what do you mean marathon in combat boots that's what boxers used to train they didn't run marathons yo they ran like eight miles what do you mean? Marathon in combat boots? That's what boxers used to train. Yeah, but they didn't run marathons, yo.

They ran like eight miles. What do you mean? A boxer runs like eight miles. He don't run 26 or whatever it is. Son, Larry Schultz ain't no bitch. You know what I'm saying? Larry Schultz out here dicking down girls. You know what I'm saying?

Before my mom, he was dicking down these girls, bro. Dicks down. Do you know what I mean? With the fatty. He had that fatty, bro. Dicks down. Do you know what I mean? With the fatty. He had that fatty, bro. Stuffing them full of it. Full pubic hair, too. Full of what?

What? What? Fat dick, bro. He was stuffing fat dick in there, dude. That's how things work. Fucking marathon. Yo, you know what? That is crazy.

That's wild, yo. That's how you can tell there's double standards. Because I want my dad to get all the pussy before my mom. And if my mom was out here fucking dudes, I'm like, you know what? That is crazy. That's how you can tell there's double standards. Because I want my dad to get all the pussy before my mom. And if my mom was out here fucking dudes, I'm like, you whore. The fuck is wrong with you? Right? Save your puss for my dad. And me to come out of.

You know what I'm saying? Like, that is crazy. But if girls were being fucked up to my dad, nah. You just switched to double standard, mid-double standard. No, like if girls were disrespecting my dad by not giving switched to double standard mid double standard no like if girls were disrespecting my dad by not giving him pussy back in the day that's fucked up like that's super foul i think it's because you look at your mom like that's your first house you know what i mean you don't want to be lived in so yeah some guys like disrespecting it you're like that's so funny like yo i mean that's so funny that's what i used to live

there like you don't want to feel like i built this motherfucker real talk dude come on man it's like someone like ruining your apartment yeah it's like when your school gets knocked down it's like damn that was mine yeah bro no bullshit i remember my dad fucking my mom when i was in my mom come on no dead serious dog dead serious i remember that i was bobbing and weaving like mayweather in that bitch shoulder rolling maybe he's trying to train you to box so we are maybe he's trying to train you so i think he was i think he would deep stroke and i have to get away from it and i have to dip slip under do you know what i'm saying sometimes i punch back you throw jabs Say what You throw jabs

I would throw jabs One time I remember I got my whole fist Stuck in his urethra I remember that I remember that shit And then he would Cool you down

Yo one time He threw a hadouken All over me That shit was wet I was like chill Bob's all You still busting his side, bro?

I'm in here, dog. I'm in here. It's a flood. I can't even make jokes about your dad fucking your mom. He was fucking her at least two times. The placenta is the first umbrella though. That shit is a perfect,

like, dude, can it cover you? I had a shield the whole time. Yeah. Get out of here. You were never in any real danger. I think I had a drop-top placenta, dog,

because that shit was hitting me right in the fucking face and the shoulder. He broke it? Son, I think he might have broke my placenta. Oh, maybe. Oh, that's fucked up. Yeah. Maybe. It's just like wearing a four-ounce mitts.

It ain't really stopping much. The placenta's headgear? Yeah. It's sparring. My dad's just sparring he used to go on field homes right there

so the sperm doesn't touch you no matter what the placenta protects 100% placenta protects yo real talk

yeah I remember one time I tried to get him with that umbilical cord I tried to choke that shit around his neck with that umbilical

and he saw it come and just snuck that dick right out of there real quick. I was like, all right. I was like, all right, fam, all right. I couldn't say that many words at that point. So I was like, all right. Anyway, Michael Phelps, stop being a bitch.

All complaining and shit, bro. I hate this, like, public complaining. He looks sick, watch. You think he got AIDS? I bet he got something. Al thinks that he can tell when people have AIDS. I guarantee you. Watch.

And he thinks Michael Phelps got AIDS. Yeah, he looks like Dallas Buyers Club right now. How much time we have on this deal? I give it a year. He's progressing. That's progressive. Progressing quickly? Yeah.

Wait, are you serious, Al? Yeah. That's why he's depressed, because he knows he's going. Are you serious for real? Yeah I don't know man I can believe you can tell When girls are pregnant But I don't believe

You can tell when girls I can spot the hiv Why can you spot the hiv? Why is that a talent? I don't know I just could spot the hiv son People just have gifts That's a gift?

Yeah That's us bro How much hiv is there left? That's a great question to ask How much hiv is left? What you mean? Before it's just AIDS? No Like how much hiv is left? What do you mean? Before it's just AIDS? No, like how much hiv is out there in the world

and AIDS combined? Like, is there more hiv than there is like platinum? Like, what do we have more of on this planet? Like, should I get my girl a ring made out of some hiv? Some h planet? Like, what's more worth? Like, should I get my girl a ring

made out of some... Some him? Some him? Like, what is more valuable? Hey, nothing says forever like him. Don't quote the opposite. You're not even coming close. Every kiss begins with him. Every kiss begins with gay.

Gay. Son. begins with gay son that's kind of sus bro what the owl knows when everyone's got hip oh yeah

why I could just spot it it's a little sus like I don't know if you're someone that

like has too good a gay dar you might be gay why aren't you sharing this with the gays back in

a day like when did you realize the superpower you could probably save at least a few million gays i don't know you could have gone to live aid bro i should have i should have so how do you know like what is it like well they just gotta look he got the look was live aid for aids it was like that's a little on the nose ain't't it? It was Woodstock for AIDS, bro. What's Live Aid? It's a concert, I guess, for like a benefit. I guess it was for AIDS. I assume that was too like close. Live Aid.

Who do you give the money to if they're dead? Having a concert, having Live AIDS for AIDS. You know what I mean? It's just whack. But let's be serious. Who do we give the money to if they're dead? It's to find a cure. Huh?

It's to find a cure. Giving them money. I was i was like yo you got the hiv here's a nickel they didn't do that shit nickel is mark's second favorite word love my nickel bro what'd you say pumper nickel what that's what your dad was doing real talk all right so um but no in all seriousness like with the corona charity where does that money go to the people at corona like i had to find a vaccine probably to help maybe so what do we do with the money we hire more scientists we're like okay we get three more scientists i think honestly some shit like that yeah like because we know we got scientists

working on it and what are they like well i'm not gonna work unless you give me some more money now i'm gonna be more science about it i think you just have more people i'm just saying like right now scientists are working right do you think they're like gonna boycott are they gonna do like science yeah like are there scientists in there like, listen, I'm getting $100,000 a year. I'm going to give you $100,000 a year of effort. But if you're trying to raise some money. Maybe you can hire a new scientist. Yes.

You know what I mean? Why don't we hire that other one? If we got better scientists, buy! Just more. Yeah. There's more people working for the same. More people doing the same math. Nah, they're trying out different things.

Back in the day, one dude could make a vaccine. Jonas Salk. The other one. Okay. Who? Jonas Salk. Just one person. Jonas Salk made a vaccine all by him damn self.

He didn't know if he needed fucking live aid, corona aid. Yeah, he didn't have no deadlines, though. That motherfucker just work on it. Say what? He didn't have no deadlines though that motherfucker just work on it say what he didn't have no deadlines that guy was just working in the fam he had the ultimate deadline he injected himself that's what we need yo that's if you really want these scientists to get to science in give them some aids seriously yo you know what hey bro you want a cure for corona you gotta give the fucking scientists corona that's what we should do you want a cure for aids give the scientists aids you want a cure for chronic give the scientists corona you want a cure for cancer give the cancer they're gonna figure that shit the fuck out once their lives are on the line.

They're not going to be dilly dallying all day, taking their time, bleaching their fucking trench coats, working on their... What's that stupid shit they put on? Check your heartbeat. I gave you the beats dog give the scientist AIDS I think you just figured it out bro I think you might have figured it out

uh huh duh yeah that's the problem with all these diseases is that too stupid of people get it that's it Akash yo i i just if you're a scientist right yeah hypothetical world where you make your parents proud yeah do you think if you got diabetes you would fix that yeah i guess what if your mom got diabetes and you had the ability i would fix that i know i ain't

shit my dad can't remember nothing i'm not even getting him an ipad or something we can write shit down right but if i was a scientist that's where i'd be putting all my fucking effort in so we need to either give scientists aids or give scientists kids aids or something you know wow add the stakes oh am i talking crazy no i think it's a good point no perfectly tell me listen i understand it's drastic measures it is funny to say give give scientists kids aids am i crazy am i talking crazy am i saying crazy will they fix it because now we got to rely on bill gates to fix everything right yeah how do you give the kids aids what how do you give the kids mark not that way mark signing up real quick mark i think you've been red billed again we got

you hear mark's response i don't have aids why don't we just assume i had aids and the fact that al said it, that kind of made me insecure. Yo, but in all seriousness, let's say there is an illness that's going to kill the entire world. Yeah. Right? Yeah.

We need scientists to work on it. Well, it's going to kill the entire... Yeah, they're already incentivized to get the... You know where they could do this? Go. China. Talk to me. China could do some shit like this.

They would do some shit like this. They kind of have a history of not really caring about the welfare of each individual in their country. It's for the greater good. Yep. You know where Wuhan came from? Where? Wuhan. Okay.

I'm with you. Okay. China. China. Yo, Trump says China with an M word in it. Right? When he says China, don't it sound a little offensive? Yeah, yeah.

China. But he ends it with an A, so it's cool. It's okay, yeah, yeah. Okay, go. End it with an ER. If he hit one, he's like,

these Chinas, that might be a little heavy. But, if you started this shit, and you want to find a cure, and you're motivated, and you don't, you're already killing motherfuckers,

you know what I mean? Inject. Honestly, I'm supportive of this. It's not the worst idea in the world. What are scientists supposed to do anymore?

What's their motivation? Didn't we figure out all the science? Today, I read an article. I read an article. I read an article. I saw an Instagram post that Lil Duval posed it. So not an article at all, just a headline.

That they found a parallel universe, two hours, where time goes backwards. Okay? What? All right. What the fuck does that even mean? My my point is why are we worried about that because there's no more science to do we've done all the science we're looking at parallel universes okay so finish the point the point is give them aids bro

like all those brilliant guys are working on another parallel universe. Even Stephen Hawking, right? Yeah. These guys work on parallel universes. Work on moving your lid. Work on parallel assists. Yeah, we should work on parallel assists. You know what I'm saying?

Like this is, what the fuck is happening? Where are our priorities here? Where are our priorities here? are priorities here no i a no we need to get science back on track science is not on track drew would you say you're a patriot say again would you say you're a patriot what is the flag behind me okay so what is the flag behind me bro american the american flag i see it four score would you seven years ago come on our forefathers set forth upon this nation wait he'll follow the tracks he could start making that was it that was a lie hey bro why

would you do that to me dogs that is new go ahead a part of the speech? Say what? I don't even know when the speech ended, bro. That's Malcolm X, fam. Go. So there are people signing up to help us find a vaccine for Corona. Yeah. And so they're volunteering to get Corona. Yep. So there are more test subjects to try vaccines on.

Yep. So will you satisfy your patriotic duty and help the world find a vaccine? I am helping the world find a vaccine. No, no, no. I'm willing to give scientists kids Corona. Yeah, but would you sign up and take that same? No, because someone needs to keep us safe. You keep it up safe?

How do you keep it up safe? I have to protect America. How are you protecting us? In the event we get an attack from China, you're going to need a badass motherfucker to be the pilot of a ship or a plane. I'm just saying. So you couldn't even protect a girl from the macho guy.

That's literally a Chinese attacker. Oh my God. a chinese a chinese attacker oh my god oh my god bro all right god bless laughter bro god bless no in all seriousness no i'm not gonna get injected with corona uh because obviously i'm doing more work on the streets so which science things do you think should get cut like find a parallel universe is cut go to mars cut go to um that's valid this is valid you go to mars cut go to the moon cut yep um. Go to like even the sky. Like go to the sky cut.

Like I don't even think. So planes are cut? Yeah, like science-y planes. Like we don't need to get better at making planes. Yeah, like we got the planes. Like we got the planes and also like, you know, how they'll study clouds. Like we're going to figure out how clouds work. It's like or not.

I think we figured clouds out but i don't know if we did because sometimes a cumulonimbus be acting crazy bro like sometimes a cumulonimbus yeah cumulonimbus is that's the fucking cloud to worry about a cumulonimbus or cumulonimbus that's multiple of them yeah that's a that's a problematic cloud yeah thick clusters tall dense mad dense dense bro all right so what about math we should cut that math has been figured out there's no more math that's what you think what name another math i don't know but some indian gonna come up with some shit the indians already figured out all the math. No, they're still figuring it out. Son, back in the day, there's an Indian. I forget the guy's name, but there's an Indian mathematician

that developed all this advanced algebra before anybody. What is his name? I forget his name, but they sent him to Cambridge. It's like some insane shit. He did it by himself. It's inside you, this shit. Yeah. Much like spelling. No, that's inside her

that's how much we love jokes we're celebrating the okay um but yeah honestly in my honest opinion we need to reconfigure science and like what we're doing with chemistry say again opinion, we need to reconfigure science and what we're doing with all this stuff. Say again? What do we need about chemistry? I think we got it. What is there to chemistry?

Chemistry makes medicine also, so we keep chemistry. I think we got it, though. Don't we have enough potions and shit? No, clearly not, because we still need vaccines for coronavirus but that vaccine is going to come from some shit we already got yeah but you got

you need a chemist to figure out how to make the compound and all that shit is it that different than flavoring a steak like you're just going

to put together some ingredients that already exist but you need the chemist to put it together fam go to the chart do you know the chart that look like America

periodic table yeah go there a little bit more periodically and then maybe we get a solution to all this shit if you ask me that's what i would do yeah yeah all you gotta do is just try each box try the boxes what's the worst that can happen advent calendar you know like just open that shit but do something with it. Like we got, look, you have some H and then you have some O and you mix the right amounts together. We got water. Take some boravine and mix it with some chlorovine. Do you know what I'm saying? And maybe we fix corona.

That's all I'm trying to say. You need the chemists to do that. Physicists could get got. Say what? Physicists could get got. That's done. We trying to say. You need the chemists to do that. Physicists could get got. Say what? Physicists could get got. That's done. We figured out physics. That's figured out.

You know what's sad? Ain't been no great physicist since Newton. That's a long ass time. Guy came up with three laws and y'all ain't done no revolutionary shit since. Son, most important thing he invented was fig. Right? Like,

think about all, son, all the science that guy did. That's a real renaissance man, yo. Fam. Gravity and figs,

yo. Son. Delicious pastries. The most amazing thing he did in his entire existence was the snack. Bruh. Right?

Think about that. Impressive. And also, what did he really invent he just witnessed shit happening and he was like oh yeah i figured that out things fall what if what did fucking newton do gravity yeah already exists yeah you think nobody else knew there was great you think motherfuckers were like, yo, we shouldn't jump. We might not come back. So discovering shit's not noteworthy? He just called it gravity.

Yeah, but we didn't know why. He's the one that's like, oh, here's why. Who gives a fuck? Nobody knows why gravity exists anyway now. Even to this day, it changes when you go into space. All the rules that they made up only apply to this atmosphere. Where we all live? Say again? I'm just saying it's useless when you go out into space all these laws are useless in space gravity's the same on the moon i just don't understand

why that matters my point is he didn't invent shit so it's not worth it if you didn't invent it honestly i think newton i think he just said some shit everybody knew. That's why everybody thought he was a bum back in the day. He was like, look, if Apple falls, it's going to hit the ground. They're like, thanks. So in 10 years when somebody's like, look, all Andrew did was put shit on YouTube. He didn't make YouTube. I knew you were going here.

If you put a video on YouTube, people will watch. I knew you were going here and I was already ready for it. They weren't doing it before me. Apple's been falling before Newton. Nobody's posting on youtube before you never i was the first i was the first youtube post now if you use gravity if newton used gravity to do some other cool shit how youtube works now what i did is i used gravity to do some cool shit so if newton used gravity exactly so if newton used gravity to do some cool shit so if newton used gravity exactly so if newton used gravity to do some cool shit then i fucks with him like if he used the power of gravity yeah to do some other shit i'm like yo newton my man told us how everything worked i'm saying there's been

no great physicists what did he fucking do he had three laws everything works on these three laws okay go give me them every action has an equal and opposite reaction. Not true. Trannies. If you fuck a tranny, the tranny's fucking you too. No, that doesn't happen. Okay? Chop your dick off.

What happens? Where's the equal and opposite reaction? The dick falls to the ground. Now you got a big hole in your dick. These are all equal and opposite things. No, that's not equal and opposite. Keep going. So that law is done.

Force equals mass times acceleration. Force equals mass times acceleration. Okay. And then? An object at rest tends to stay at rest

and an object in motion tends to stay in motion. That guy's a fucking genius, isn't he? Something that's staying still is still. Something's moving. Something's moving.

Fucking Seinfeld of science over here. Whoa. Boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom. What did I say? You can never get this to happen. Boom, boom, boom, boom, boom. Oh, God, it's done with me.

Boom, boom, boom, boom, boom. Whatever it is, right? I mean, what a fucking asshole this guy is. Imagine you just describe, hey, the sky is blue unless it's not blue. And then it's the color it is. Andrew's first law. The Andrew's first law. I'm going to make some laws that Newton made.

Yeah. Give me some laws, bro. You want some laws that Newton made? Post your content on YouTube. You ready? These are laws that Newton made. These are Andrew's new laws. Ready?

Andrew's new laws. Right? The wind will flip off your hat unless, of course, your hat is tight enough. And then the wind won't flip it off unless the wind is speedy enough and then it might speed that's literally what newton was doing and motherfuckers were looking at him like shut the fuck up captain obvious this is captain obvious here newton is a goat yo that's the elon muska back in the day oh that's why his name was Newton, bro, because he fucking said all the shit everyone knew. Yo!

Thank you, Mark! Nah, it's because he knew a ton, son! Emma fucking knew everything! Oh, shit, that was actually good, too. Y'all are nice to this world. What are you, Seinfeld? Hey, maybe watch a little more. You know what I mean?

You get in there. Fuck! Okay. Oh, fuck. All right, listen, we don't have to, you know, educate people on science too much anymore um I'm just trying to say

Newton overrated big big time overrated alright we're gonna take a break for a second and uh pay some bills shout out to the

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Why not fuck better? Easy line of logic I can think of. Done. Let's get back to the show. Any last thoughts Before we get out of here Any things that you want To get off of your chest

Akash Or any things That you want to share Do you know what I mean It's your fine ass bro People are talking about How fine you were On fucking Twitter bro

Oh my god I've been looking A little haggard recently That's alright No son Motherfuckers are like Yo he's a Yoin yoin yoin

What Yeah or they said You were a foin I'm foin They put an I in it I got that Michael B. Jordan Son they said You were a foin I'm foin They put an I in it I got that Michael B. Jordan They said you were a foin bro Hey

So how do you feel about that Anything you want to say Hey Michael B. Jordan Call me Let's talk about How fine we are together Oh Okay

Alright Is that what you want to do With that That's your approach Alright You know it's interesting To each his own Okay Anything else you want to touch on that? That's your approach? All right. You know, it's interesting. To each his own.

Okay. Anything else you want to touch on before we get the fuck out this bitch? No. You're done. That's it. There's nothing else. I think I'm good. So help you God.

Well, I know who needs some help is these motherfuckers at Comedy Central broke his fucking got nothing to do. You probably even made it to the end of this podcast because you're sitting at home waiting on unemployment checks. Anyway, I don't even know if that shit's true, to be honest with you. They might still be working.

I mean, you know what I'm saying? You know what I'm saying? You know what I'm saying? Hit that Dougie dog. Hit that motherfucking dog. These guys are comedy sets. These guys are comedy sets. Just like, you thot. No, but in all seriousness, who told me?

I think Chrissy told me. Bro, this is North Korea, bro. Yeah, we in North Korea. All people in North Korea are like, we defeated everyone, bro. We won the World Cup. Nah, but in all seriousness, I think it is true. I think someone told me. Chris told me.

Someone told me they all got choppy. They all got that choppy choppy. That's sad. Didn't happen earlier. Anyway, y'all. Yo, listen. Flagrant to Patreon, by the way. Patreon, yo.

How was this not a Patreon? I know, bro. Flagrant 2. Patreon, by the way. Patreon, yo. How was this not a Patreon? I know, bro. We were wilding. Yo, if y'all enjoyed a hang, come kick with us Fridays on Patreon, man. We just getting even crazier. Even looser. Patreon.com slash Flagrant 2. Join the asshole army.

The massive asshole army Patreon. Top 10 in the world. No big deal, though. I mean, there's a reason for it, but no big deal. We out here. It's top 10. You know what I'm saying? We trying to be top 5. No big deal though. I mean, there's a reason for it, but no big deal. We out here. It's top 10. You know what I'm saying? We trying to be top five.

Let's do it. And then we come for that number one spot because that's how we do things. Anyway, y'all, we appreciate y'all, man.

Thank you so much for listening. Hope you enjoying all the content that we've been serving in the quarantine. Make sure you check out the Schultz Eps. We put that on

D'Andre Schultz YouTube channel and Instagram and, you know, God bless the goat goat joe rogan for sharing them and all the other people that have been sharing and spreading the word man it's been pretty awesome to see it happen um to see this show grow you know just we do it once a week we take a topic we drop saturdays and i mean it's just pretty cool how amazing we are at it. You know, I mean, first episode, I thought we were easily better than any late night show. Second episode, we were better than Daily Show.

Third episode, we were better than John Oliver. Fourth episode, there's really nobody for us to compete with anymore. So maybe we've got to find something else to do, to be honest with you, after we've just destroyed all the competition, we need to find new boxes to check off. So we're coming for you. Yeah. You know who you are.

Not going to say it, but you know who you are. We're coming for you. Boom, ba-dum, boom, boom. All right, guys. Peace.