Andrew Schulz's Flagrant with Akaash Singh - History Hyenas on Israel & Iran, Kanye is MLKs Dream, & the History of the Ottoman Empire

Episode Date: June 18, 2025

YERRR – the boys from History Hyenas pulled up and it was instant chaos. Chrissy D and Yanny P brought the wildest takes on history, politics, and whatever unhinged topic came to mind. All that and more on this week’s episode of FLAGRANT. INDULGE. 00:00 Air India Crash + 9/11 Conspiracies 3:42 What's happening in Iran? 6:58 Ladder 14 Takeover 16:16 Why they capping about Epstein? 20:24 Podcast Prezzy, AI + All smell the same 22:11 Being on top + Yannis is Turkish? Crete Supremacy 27:30 Researching Hitty speeches + He's a closer 32:34 Churchill + Muzzies are tricky 34:09 King Xi + Yannis Almost + Donny Flip Flops 40:39 Greeks boys are delicious + Carmen Carrera + Exploration 47:53 Is Chris gay? Best leaders were gay 52:34 Conquering + 13 Colonies + Louisiana Purchase 1:00:37 OKC gonna win this + Foot race with Jalen Brunson 1:07:55 Gen Z are petrified + Authenticity 1:11:17 Comedy Bubble deflation + Chris hates the road 1:20:42 Catching heat + This is art 1:25:41 Roasting poor Joey + No Kings Protest 1:30:20 Trump is reactive + Dems can WIN 1:37:37 Ye Is Jackie Robinson 1:43:30 Yannis working on his trauma + Power of community 2:07:36 There is a God 2:13:25 Chris is admirable + Choosing peace 2:21:02 Why do women love true crime? 2:22:35 WNBA is for the boys Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

If you flew in Air India once and that was your second time flying Air India, Yeah. I have no sympathy for you. I have no... You're repeating... Why is it so bad? The planes are janky as f... Like you'll see first class seats, just like, rips in them with duct tape over them.

So you think it was the plane, it wasn't pilot error. How could it be pilot error? You think they tried to fly in... The guy hit the wrong button, I decided I don't know aviation. Yeah, I see. The possible Pakistan was impossible. That's button I decided I don't know aviation Possible Pakistan was about that's what I thought I needed that kid said he wanted to become pilot My only question is how do that one guy survive? He said he jumped out and they for sure verified it was him. They verified his passport, allegedly,

verified his plane ticket, his name. What are the chances they just grab somebody and they're like, this would be a cool story? You know, he can tell me. Yeah. Also, like, I could buy an Indian passport at a vape shop. So it's like, did he have a vape? Yeah.

I'm like, it's a CD and Yanni Trapani. It's a pot. Yeah. Have you seen how this has turned into a 9-Eleven conspiracy? Oh, god. By the way, dude, people online are like, because now you can see the building and it just looks like a plane with the tail sticking out of just like a two-story building.

That's right, it doesn't penetrate. It's just sitting there. So they're like, how the fuck did these two buildings go down? The plane looked like a white guy trying to dunk. I can't get to the rim. So oh wow, so they're saying there's no way that the 20-towers could have gone down. So now everyone's like, how is it possible that this happened with these massive buildings reinforced with steel beams?

Well, luckily we have two engineering experts on the podcast. Engineering, history, we're definitely Middle East experts. So how did the plane get stuck? Can we figure that out? The plane got stuck because all of the South Asian geniuses who were Indian are in America. Oh. And there's a good brain drain. We took all their engineers.

Ah, brain drain. Yeah, so they couldn't even fly a plane through a building. Yeah, if you're a good Indian, you're here. This is the NBA. Yeah. The United States. For Canada. It's like if you're a good black person,

you're in the United States. Yes, yes. Indians are killing. Is that how you're saying that? Yes, the best of the best get here. Yeah, yeah. The fence right here. We got one of the better ones in right here.

The fence is in right here. Yeah, that is true. Yeah, I do. So that's right here. We got one of the better ones in right here. That is true. Yeah, I do. So I just think it was one of those situations where that becomes evident when they try to fly a plane and you're just like, should've hired Akash for that.

I also imagine Air India might be the type of airline where they just pack so many people in, like people are standing on the subway, you know what I mean? Like they have handrails and maybe that's how the guy got out, he was standing. Maybe, I won't defend Air India ever. Again, I've flown it twice and I've learned my lesson.

But there are, Vistada was a really good Indian airline and then Air India bought them and I was like, now I'm out, I'm not buying that. Well, cause this plane is like a legitimate, like it's a dreamliner, right? That's like a new age plane. Man, it took off from Gujarat, right? You don't know what kind of corners

these motherfuckers be cutting over there. Seriously, right? These Gujarat, these windows. I mean, look kind of corners these motherfuckers be cutting over there. Seriously, right? I mean, look at that. It didn't even go through the building. Yeah, we should look at the plane and how it started. I wanna look at this building. Yeah. I mean, I guess the Twin Towers,

the building is mostly glass. With all why the Twin Towers? Yeah, why did it just go right through the Twin Towers? Oh, right, right. Steel beams outside. Well, yeah, it went through the steel beams. Yeah, it went it just go right through the Twin Towers? Oh, right. Right. That steel beams. Well, yeah, it went through the steel beams. Yeah, it went through the steel beams. Maybe, maybe because I don't know, because here's the thing I don't know.

Remember, you're an engineer. But I'm going to say I don't know. Watching Chris roll his chin and try not to blow him is so funny. I don't know. It was almost like he was rubbing his nose to figure it out. It's the reason why it went through, because I'm not 100% sure, I'm not 100% sure if the steel beams needed to be removed on September 10th for the Israelis to put the bombs in. I don't know if, I don't know, because I'm not, I don't know if Israel was able to wire

that building with bombs before the, it's just a question obviously. So what's happening in Iran now then guys? Let's just get to the, let's just get down to obviously, Yann said. So what's happening in Iran now, then, guys? Let's just get down to it. And who are you guys rooting for? Iran is an interesting place. Yeah, who's a good guy and who's a bad guy? I'd like to see... Here's the thing.

I'd like to see somewhat of a fight with Iran. Like, I kind of look at Iran as the Pacers. Okay. They're the underdogs. You're supposed to not like them This is a horrible idea Iran has got some fight in them Yeah, this is the most Andrew has ever cared about an issue and I love watching him be uncomfortable

It's just cuz I first I'm invested and I have no clue what the truth is at all. Everybody that I talked to Says that they know exactly what's going on and they're completely different takes no matter who I talk to. And it's just like, what the fuck is happening? Well that's what timelines are now. You go on one timeline, you get one thing, you go on another timeline, you get another thing. What do you mean by that?

What do you mean by that? Your timeline's either gonna go, you know. It's an echo chamber. Yeah, it's an echo chamber. Oh, oh god, I thought we were talking about like Marvel timelines. Like there's some sort of like, it's a multiverse thing.

It's a multiverse thing. It's a multiverse, no. You mean like your timeline, your algorithm. Yeah, yeah, yeah, got it, yeah. Yeah, my algorithm is disagreeing with each other right now. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's totally, you go on one, you're like, okay, that's the truth.

And then you go on another and you're like, that's the truth. It's hard to know. And I think it's funner that way. Do you? I think it's funner to remove nuance and get straight to the extremes and let them fucking have it out. Fight it out, yeah.

But does it not give you anxiety or you? Or you can compartmentalize it and just be like hey, I'm on the outside. I'm not as rich as you if we die we die Yeah You're a property owner I am a property owner Watch it on YouTube YouTube yeah, yes Yeah, no, yeah, it's the better you do the more you get scared of World War three

But that's why I like to stay in the middle because it's actually PT before they did say there's no World War three is not happening Chachi PT said it's not gonna happen yet Yes, because that too much mutually assured destruction can't happen the only way they said it could happen The only way they said it could happen is if they said Trump decides to oh, I'm sorry Netanyahu decides to kill the president of Iran. I can't say those names Khomeini the lead guy in Iran said if he drops him then we're gonna get close and then I shut down Chachi Bti And I went in the New York Post and they said that Netanyahu said I'm gonna kill him Because he said he thinks the only way to stop the war I said he's going to kill the lead guy in Iran because he said he thinks it's the only way to stop the war.

I said buckle up. We're going into World War III. And I agree with Yanni, it depends on what timeline you're on. It depends on what group chat you're on. If you're in the group chat, if you're in the group chat, that believes Donald Trump is king and you go protesting. What's up with Donnie Flip Flops, man? Listen, what's up with Donnie Flip Flops?

Donnie Flip Flops if I think that if he I think if we do go into war with Iran then I think that he knows he can't do that the Trump why does he know you can't because the support your boys saying right now what are your boys saying Run! What my boys are saying... J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J- The firehouse is we know what Westchester said that the firehouse down with Iran. Yeah We are you know also I don't know if you know a couple of firefighters from ladder 14 we get all our information from a guy named Schmidty Yeah, yeah, we got a lot of time at the firehouse You know waiting for fire all I'm asked I'm gonna ask you this right?

Ask me tell me how could they you really believe that number six million? Ask me it. Tell me how could they you really believe that number six million? Smitty took out the calculator he said and he knows something about fire That's a lot of that's You could never do six million. That's like fucking three million a day You ever fucking cook the pizza, you get one pie in there at a time. You cannot get fucking 16 million chews at a time per day. Okay, so maybe 10,000, maybe five. Who knows? Maybe it didn't happen. Every bunch of million opus, you tell us there's another number. The one thing we know is fire. Fire.

We know fire. So that's what they're saying. Also, the Jews, their skin is not oily. Let him go. If it was Greeks, if it was fucking Greeks, they're combustible. They would repel it. They're combustible. No, no, six million Greeks. Then I could understand you. Because they got oil. They're combustible.

So you could get six million, but fucking dry, psoriasis, fucking Jews, you can't burn those things quickly. You ever try to get a coconut? Six hundred fucking, ask your fucking boy, Dove, you can't burn those things quickly. You ever try to get a cook of my six hundred fucking ask your fucking boy dub You can't burn that guy. Yeah. Yeah, you can't this is taking over Every single like aspect of the internet there's this guy that I follow and I've talked about before the show He basically goes up to people just kind of like man on the internet. There's this guy that I follow, and I've talked about him before on the show. He basically goes up to people who just kind of like man on the street content, but in gyms, and asks people. Sorry, I can't take you.

Isn't it weird? I haven't seen him be the straight guy. No, I just haven't seen. What have you done to him? I haven't seen conquistador face Andrew Schultz yet. Yeah, this is crap. Last time I was here, it was dictated without the fucking, with that haircut, and I was like,

by the way, I just went, hello, my name is Ania Montoya. You'll hear my father say, from Spain. From Spain, the original people who brought Africans, created slavery, Spain. I think we should just, if you wanna know about history, I know whites are bad, but we're not, we're the worst, but just recently. Spanish people from Spain,

they're the ones that brought African slaves. They're white, but they're white. But Spanish people are very interesting. Spanish people are very interesting from Spain. Because when they want to be on the right side here, they're like, no, we are Spanish, oh no. And then when I say, yeah, but aren't you guys, you brought slavery here, you're white.

They'll say, no, we're not white. They're white when it's good for them, Spanish when it's good for them. Don't ruin what he's saying with a fact. Which is very white, though. That's a very white thing. That is a very white thing to do. What?

Pretend you're not white. Exactly. Yeah, so they're just being white about it. They're being white about it, right. They're whitest. Right, whitest. They are white, Spanish are white. Anyway, there's this guy who does this

natty or not thing, he'll go up to people. Yes. And he goes, natty or not, if you're on steroids, he goes up to people working out, right? I've been watching this guy's content for like a year or two or something like that. It's just funny to expose these workout things. Don't let him, don't let him.

The last video he posted, he just goes up to people and he goes, if you were kicked out of 109 bars, would you say that it was the bar's fault or was it your fault? And then he goes, do you think it'd be possible to make six million pizzas in three years? And then he goes, what do you mean? He goes, that's like 3,000 pizzas a day,

do you think that's possible? I'm like, when did the Holocaust denial hit the workout algorithm? What, social media? His whole content is now, the Jews out there. So what social media? His whole content is now the Jews are lying. Right. And he was originally lying about steroids. They're not 90, dude. That's not in 96 million. That's the whole issue.

I guess he is 90 or not. That is interesting. Okay. Do you think this is organic? Performance enhancing ovens. Do you think this is organic? You mean the no Kings protest? No.

Well, yeah. I mean, like just everyone interested in like, you know, when I was a kid, well, yeah. I mean, like, just everyone interested in, like, you know, when I was a kid, dude, I didn't- I have no- I didn't even know who the mayor was. Being Indian's a good place to be right now. If you didn't come to me and ask me to smell your fingers when I was 12, I wasn't interested.

So where do you think it comes from? I just think there seems to be sort of, you know, the digital places where all this is playing out. Yes. And we- Yes. All the kids are on there. You can't fight war anymore the way you used to fight war because of mutually assured destruction. So there's a lot of foreign influence online trying to win the hearts and minds.

So who's influencing? Who's paying the money? I don't, you got big players. Who benefits the most? You got big players. China, Russia? You got big players. Probably all of them.

Yeah. Probably everybody, dude. Yeah. Lasers. China, Russia? Big players. Probably all of them. Yeah. Probably everybody, dude. Yeah. Lasers. Well, it's not Israel. Israel's losing the, they're losing the fucking, what's it called, war? PR war. They're losing a PR war.

So they're not spending enough money if they are spending. China, you could say- That sounds about right. They're just not spending enough. Trying to cut a deal, you know what I mean? But what is it? Is it Qatar? Is it Russia?

Well, Qatar, this is a fact, this isn't a history, I hate the facts, this is a fact. Qatar spends the most money on education. What does Smitty have to say about that? Smitty would say, he's fucking- Smitty would remind you that slavery's still alive and it's in Qatar and Saudi Arabia. That's what Smitty would say. He would remind you that slavery is still alive and it's in Qatar and Saudi Arabia. That's what Schmidty would say. He would tell you that it's still fucking alive and that it's Middle Eastern people who are the worst and not the white. Schmidty would deflect from the white. And it's Indian people and it's not, don't blame fucking the white for all the problems.

They picked the right people. They did pick the right people. That's what Schmidty would say. He would say, you know what's fucking going on. Osama fucking, you know what's going on. You know what the fuck's going on. You know what the fuck's going on. What's going on? The fucking Sandra Dees. Right. Sandra Dees. What he would say? Sandra Dees. You know, they got a different religion. Yeah, it's all it is. And you know, they want a car car They want a fucking car. Yeah, you know, they were building a mosque in Smitty's neighborhood Before we burnt it down Fire we'll go put out the fire

Who knows how to start a fire better than fucking Smitty? Yeah, I mean guys fucking crazy that is but he takes care of his fucking neighborhood That is crazy. But he takes care of his fucking neighborhood. He does. He does. He does. He does. He does. He does.

He does. He does. He does. He does. He does. He does. He does. He does.

He does. He does. He does. He does. He does. He does. He does. He does.

He does. He does. He does. He does. He does. He does. He does. Thank you, thank you, Chrisley. I think there's so many angles. You guys are a treasure, dude. Perception is reality.

It's however you perceive the facts to be, that's how they'll be, baby. The history of hyenas are back. I know. I know. The history of hyenas are back. I love it. It's good to be back with you. I'm so sorry I broke y'all up.

Wait, how did that happen to you? I was thinking about this on the way here. I was like, what was your role in it? I gave them COVID. Yes. Yes. Yana's had a mental breakdown Period of enlightenment But you should call me with a weak voice. Do you remember that?

Glamorous death I'd be crazy. I'd be crazy. I'd be crazy. Imagine a more glamorous death. Imagine the Indian gave you the disease. Oh my gosh. What a fucking. What a fucking.

What an ironic guy would be. Yeah, ironic. Yeah. Yeah. So then that seemed to be the beginning of the end. Yeah. Right. But then, but in reality though, you know, we, we, we took the vaccine.

And that's what happened. We took the vaccine and then we just, the bottom line is we do not do the history in this podcast unless Trump is in charge. And Trump is off for four years, so so are we. And that's when we came back. That's when we came back. We came back. Read into that however you like.

Read into that, so the thing is, if you want to see more history in his over the next few years, and you have to change the presidential election laws, we gotta give our king a fair time. I asked before the podcast, Chrissy with a straight face, Chrissy, we're discussing what's happening in Israel and if America is going to get involved.

And he's like, listen, I don't think they can do it. Because if they do it, his base is going to revolt. He's not going to be able to win another term. I go, well, yeah, he can't do that. He goes, yeah, I know his base won't support it. And I go, no, no, that's not legally allowed. And he goes, bah, we're working on it. Yeah.

Yeah, cause Dan Tegino, one of the heads of the FBI, is from our neighborhood. Yo, but what's, cause Dan Bongino, one of the heads of the FBI, is from our neighborhood. Yo, but what's up with Dan Bannon over? What's up with Dan Bannon? He's a neighborhood guy. Hey, his fucking mother lives above my nanny. She's a great tenant. Is she getting shit now that he's bent over?

No, no, no. I think that he, I don't know, if I'm gonna be honest with you. Can you be honest with me? We don't know because when we had this conversation with Dan Bongino at O'Neill's in Maspit, we thought he was gonna go our way. And then the guys out there saying that the Epstein's killed himself. And we're like, that's not what you said in Maspit.

I heard they got him wearing a little hat. Right. Oh. I heard they got him wearing a little hat behind closed doors. I already got him put on a little. That's what I heard, I already got him wear it. We call Jews frisbees. No. It's because of the hats, yeah. Oh, got a word. We call Jews frisbees. No.

It's because of the hats. Oh. Is that why? We weren't sure. Thank you for explaining. You don't need a frisbee at the park. They're frisbees. No, honestly, I don't know what the hell is going on.

I have no idea. Dan Bajito, nobody really knows what's going on. All I know is I went to- Dan and Cash immediately. Why would Cash even go on Rogan and Cap like that? I don't know. I didn't even know. Because I think Trump is on the Epstein list. But we all know that.

Yeah. This is not like we saw the picture with them hanging out. They're friends. They're all friends. Yeah, but so what? Do you think the base would care? Yeah, you're right. Well, the hardcore base would make a fool of you.

He just can't be on the island fucking 14-year-old. If he knows the guy- But the island isn't so they care? Yeah. Yeah, you're right Well the hardcore base can't be on the island fucking 14 year old But the island isn't where the fucking supposedly have of course we know what happened But the evidence is from the apartment from the from the from the townhouse. That's where they found the cameras That's where they found the tapes. Why haven't we seen any of the parties the videos this is why is your boy running cover? Danny B. Yeah Guy running cover. That's what I said when he got here when he got into the FBI We were like, wow, look at this guy one of us really made Over this deli tomorrow Ridgewood Glendlendale-Mass

for Terry, I mean, Danny B is the biggest of all. He went to Archbishop of Illinois High School. It used to just be me, the good alumni from- Jesus Christ. It used to just be, hold on. The good alumni used to just be Ray Romano. What the hell just happened? Ray Romano.

He's got 300 cholesterol. He's on the beam right now. He's got 300 cholesterol. He's got 300 cholesterol. He's got 300 cholesterol. He's got 300 cholesterol. He's got 300 cholesterol. He's got 300 cholesterol. He's got 300 cholesterol. He's on the beam right now. He's got 300 cholesterol. He doesn't eat what he ate.

He just dropped 20 pounds. But his hair looks incredible. His hair looks amazing. I'm scurvy. I'm back like the 40s just in case we go into WW3. I got it slicked back on the sides. It looks good. Like a cadet.

All right guys, not that many show dates. June 19th, that's this week through 21st, Salt Lake City, Utah, I'm at Wise Guys Comedy Club. These tickets are almost sold out. Also, oh, I need to say this, Dubai, I'm gonna be there for the Dubai Comedy Festival. October 5th, the tickets are already over half sold out. So hurry up and buy those tickets.

And last but not least, I'm very excited. I went to India like a month or so ago. I interviewed some people I'm very excited about. I also interviewed one or two people in the States and I'm gonna start dropping those my first episode with Rami Youssef. We'll be dropping either this week or next week. But look for it on my YouTube page.

I'm very excited about this. I love y'all, thank y'all. Let's get back to the show. What's up guys, special announcement. I want to shake your hand. I have a very secret and special and important message for you listening, yes, you, right now, driving your car, working. And the best way for me to tell you that is if you come to my shows, I'm going to Portland, Oregon, Fort Worth, Austin, Texas, Stanford.

I'm also doing the hard rock in Times Square in New York City. I'll be doing a show produced by my good friend Alex Media on July 19th. Also at the end of the month. Oh, oh, oh, oh! Oh, suck his dick! Suck his dick! Suck his dick! Dude, please don't. I'll be doing a show produced by my good friend Alex media on July 19th also at the end of the month Please don't did father Ben my priest hit me up and he was like, yo, why does our cash keep saying that I said? Chandler, Arizona, Washington DC San Diego Burlington Vermont and then also Month we're doing a show

It's my show with Joey Avery. I'll see you guys there. I can't wait to tell you my secret message. See me after the show. Sorry, I was peeing. Peace. What's up, guys? Finally, I'm here. I'm throwing a show, comedy show.

It's gonna be fun. No two drink minimum. Fuck all that shit. Just buy a ticket. And he's paying the comics more. And I'm paying comics more because comics be broke-knotted. What a guy. You know, I do good stuff.

Do not suck his dick! Why not? Because, that's why. Because that's why. Do not suck his dick, he's an engaged man. We're talking to the dudes though. When he's married, you can suck his dick, because then that's all that stops. Yeah, but if it's dudes, it's not cheating.

That's true. If you're a man, you can suck his dick. It's huge. Oh, fuck, this is going to be an episode. Okay, we're throwing a show on June 28th at Barloom, and then also July 19th at the Hard Rock. July 10th. Also known as July 10th.

Cancel Comedy, right? Cancel Comedy? Cancel Comedy, July 10th. We're making it a day from now on. Just go to Cancel Comedy X on Instagram, check the bio, we'll have a link for all the tickets, and let's get back to the show. We can only call this the podcast administration. That's what it is. Yes, yes. Instagram, check the bio, we'll have a link for all the tickets and let's get back to the show.

We can only call this the podcast administration. That's what it is. They're all podcast guests. That's what they are. They've all done the podcast. Obama was Facebook. Was it Trump was Twitter? Cambridge Analytica.

Right, but that was Obama's Facebook. I think Trump was Twitter. Biden was, I don't even know what it is. And then the latest Trump was probably tick-tock Yeah, and then and podcasts and podcasts. Yes tick-tock pocket and then the next one will be AI Yes, and that's gonna be the interesting one Do you think the AI will be culturally sensitive where they are? Like do you think in the Muslim countries a eyes will be wrapped up. Of course. Jewish AI will be wrapped up. Absolutely. 100%. You have to respect the culture.

100%. 100%. You can't be white or black. Yeah, well what do you think they'll be? I think they will be culturally sensitive, yeah. Yeah, and in America what would they look like? America, they'd be fat. Right, they'd be fat, fucking fat robots.

Yeah. Yeah. Canadian, they'll be trans. Canadian, they'll be trans. Yeah. Yeah. Well, yeah, everyone's scared of AI, but once we can fuck them, the fear goes away. Everyone was scared of the internet once you found out you can just jerk to infinite porn.

Once we can put a dick in a robot, all the things have gone. They have the thing in China already. They have the Chinese sperm extractors. Look it up. They have a thing. Chinese already. They have the Chinese sperm extractors. Look it up. They really have a thing. Chinese sperm extractors, yeah. And then they're just going to put faces on it.

Isn't that like a nail salon or something? Yes. What is it? A massage parlor. What we call a massage by an Asian woman is a loophole. If you don't want to cheat on your wife, little loophole. You get a massage from an Asian friend of ours. You know his wife is cool with it and he won't do it?

You got to do it. She's starting to flip-flop already. She's starting to be like, I don't know. No, cause dude. I don't get the fucking deal. Listen to me right now. The Chinese are taking over, we're getting the silver medal. What's happening?

But if you want a little fucking American dignity, where you go is you go get a pedicure to get those Chinese at your feet. You go get jerked off to get those Chinese. You feel just to feel one more time. I'm gonna pitch this to her. I'm gonna pitch this to her. We're on top. I went and got a pedicure and I was like,

yeah, yeah, yeah, that's fucking America. Yeah, get down there. We're losing it. We just have to accept defeat. Like General George Washington, just we had to accept defeat. And as United States, we just accept it. Silver medal's not bad.

Did you check to see if they were even Chinese or it was close enough? Dude, I mean, go. You know what I mean. I'm not a phenotype expert. Nobody can tell the difference. I just say, look, Pakistan and India is going to war. It's sad to see two people who smell so similar. I don't go in a cabin and go, oh, that's Pakistani.

I mean, it's just fucking, they're all the same. They just got different- Turks, Greeks, the same thing. Same shit. I mean, I's Pakistani. I mean, it's just fucking, they're all the same. They just got different... Turks, Greeks, the same thing. Same shit. I mean, I'm Turk, I haven't Turk-ed. Really? You found out. It's rap gene. Maybe you got some sell-outs in your family. Have you ever met Greeks and Turks?

Yeah. They don't get along. No? No. But there could have been one that was turned on by the power of that Turkish man. You mean like a Romeo and Juliet kind of? Yeah. Oh, possible. I want to think so, but unfortunately I know one of my ancestors was held down and fucked against their will. And it's just what happened.

Is that what they said to avoid the shame? Of falling in love with a Turkish man? Are you talking about a woman or just a Greek boy who got fucked by her? Many of my ancestors were held down and fucked against say it. When they work for a mathematician. There's no other way to explain, you know? There's no other way to explain. Were you an island Greek? I was an island Greek.

Which island? Well, half island Greek, yeah, both island Greek. Which islands? My dad is from, I still call it Imbros. Now it's some name with some squiggly shit on top of it. Oh, it's a Turkish town. Yeah, the Turkish city. And C it. Oh, it's a Turkish And Crete oh whoa the big one. Yeah

It started and Crete's are fighters, right? They're fighters right a little inbred as well. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah most Greeks are Yeah, I mean look at my eyes Good breeding Advantage of having that you? Of being inbred? Stronger. Stronger. Stronger. I say zero.

My immune system is worse. My eyes are too close together. I get a 10 degree slit. His eyes are too close together. I call his eyes Israel and Palestine. This is the border right here. This is the UN zone right here. That's what it is.

Cyprus. It's a tight border. It's just what it is. He's got a small head, I have a big head. We just even each other out. We just do even each other out. So tell me why the Cretans, Cretians are they called? Cretans. The Cretans, why are the Cretans

different than regular Greeks? Because they're like the Sicilians. Of Greece. If you go like, Sicily to Italy, the Cretans are like to Greece, what the Sicilians are to Italians. Are they like, are they thought of as part of Greece? The Greeks make fun of them because they're crazy

and violent. Which is what? Yeah, so, but they fight. I mean, look at the, you know, World War II. Most historians credit the Cretans and that resistance of Hitler as, it took, to put it into context, it took the Nazis like four days to take France. You fucking pussies.

Clean your mirrors too. Every time you go in a fucking French restaurant, you're like, why the mirror's dirty? Anyway. But you know, but you know, but you know, I mean, you ever notice that? It's like, that's your, that's your, that's your style, it's a dirty mirror.

Anyway, that's another thing. But. I'll tell you why it took them four days, France in the second. But I'll finish up. It took them a couple days. It took the Nazis 10 days to take the island. Well, we did eventually take it. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It's true. It's true. Yeah. It's funny that we're friends and we have a podcast together because he really is the predator and I'm the prey.

Yeah, I did my answer and she said like 98% German. And I was like, holy shit. Wow. That's not enough. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, one dropper rule. Yeah, I couldn't believe how German I was, but what can you do, you know?

Yeah. Yeah, but it is true. But it took you twice as long. It took him 10 days to take the island, so that, Hitler had to refocus down there, right? And so that- Why was the island a strategic advantage? Because of Africa, access to Africa. It's the closest island to Africa.

Launching pad, yeah. So it was very important. And so that made them focus there, and then they had to put off the invasion of Russia towards the winner, and then we all got fucked. So you guys were the deciding factor. Yeah, you're like a turning point. Yeah, Winston, and Hitler gave us props, there's a quote.

No, not Hitler, Churchill. Both did, Hitler also gave us props. Just for those people who love Hitler out there, and there's a lot of them now. Right, Hitler also gave the Greeks props. Churchill said, from here on, we will say. They started translating those gave the Greeks props. You know, Churchill said, from here on we will say... They started translating those speeches and it's fucking worth it. I know, I know.

I'll tell you what, I'll tell you what. You know what's interesting? Oh, God, don't. You got your point. Don't tell us much. No, it's one thing. Listen, keep your hand like that though. What?

What? I'm just autistic. I'm just fucking awkward. Guy, I'm just doing shoulders. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And so... And so... And so...

And so... And so... And so... And so... And so... Why? Why? Why? I'm just autistic. No, no, no. I'm just fucking awkward. I'm just doing shoulders. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And so, and so. But I was in my, I was watching, listen, for research, I was watching a Hitler speech from before he translated it in English. I was just watching it, you know, whatever.

Watching it's a little thing I weekly, whatever. I was watching one and had the kids around, we don't do miss Rachel anymore now We do that I was watching this this I forgot to bring my knee pad And it's in English and so, you know my girl who's you know Latina Feminist whatever, you know, hey way despises Hitler and the right and all that stuff. Yeah and the right and all that stuff. So.

That didn't make her a feminist. But she's got a pussy. And so, and so she's in the kitchen, you know, making, you know, whatever, her food. And so she's just listening, making breakfast and she's, and Hitler's going off. I mean, Hitler's going, cause what Hitler, when he, when he listens to him,

no, it's awful what he did, right? But if you just listen to the words, forget about what he did, listen to the words. He's basically saying, and he says to an English, no, it's awful what he did, right? But if you just listen to the words, forget about what he did, listen to the words. He's basically saying, and he says it in German, but translated in English, he goes, we are about to fight the two great superpowers. Germany is about to fight England, okay? And he says, and oh, what this video did

was they changed Germany, every time Hitler said Germany, they changed it to the United States. But that's just, it was a weird AI thing I was watching. But he says, Germany is about to fight England, these are two superpowers. And the only way, the only way to move forward is one must die and one must live. And I swear to my people, Germany will live.

And people are like going crazy, it's like, whatever. And so you go wild and then she goes, yo, who is that like a new candidate? Who is that? That guy sounds awesome. I'll vote for that. I said, oh yeah, it is a new candidate. His name's Adolf Hitler.

And she was like, why are you tricking me? I was like, no, I didn't. No, I didn't because that's the thing with Hitler. He's awful. You loved him. No, no, no, no, no. I don't love him. I don't love him. The kid is a closer. No, no, no. The kid is a headliner. That's what thing with Hitler's. He's awful. You loved him. No, no, no, no. I don't love him. The kid is a closer.

No, no, no. The kid is a headliner. That's what I'm saying. He's not a middle act dog. When you watch that guy perform, you all want, you're like, ah, fuck! Yeah, he can talk. He's adding shows.

Yeah, he's so. He's, he's, he's, he's. No, so I'm saying that, Hitler, all the stuff he did was, he is, he is. He's hitting his bonus. Free sale code Kyle. Try to follow that dude at the cellar. And not, and not.

Okay? So, it is, he's like a comedian that raps, you can't follow it. So, what's his name? Shots fired. I don't know. There's a lot of them. Shout out Derek Gaines. Yeah. So I was thinking. He was not talking about Derek. Yeah.

There's an English guy. I love Derek Gaines. Okay. I forgot. I don't know. You know exactly who he is. I honestly don't. The one guy that doesn't have to sell it that you follow and then ate dick.

No. I always go. When I want to do the comedy show, I always say, you know, I'm going to do the comedy show. I'm going to do the comedy show. I'm going to do the comedy show. I'm going to do the comedy show. I'm going to do the comedy show. I'm going to do the comedy show. I'm going to do the have the cellar that you followed and then ate dick. No, I always go, now when I do the comedy cellar,

I always say before 10 p.m. so I'm always on the nice and early shows where it's just a bomb fest for everybody. Everybody's just kind of mailing it in at 7 p.m. and we're just having fun. And then I go home, get the kids to bed, and throw on Hitler and English. But I'm just saying.

And go to sleep, right? No, no, what we're saying is, is because you know, just having a conversation about it. Remember the last episode was all parenting techniques? Right. I think we just found a new testimony. So, but Hitty, he was. He was.

He was. He was. So, the thing is, him. Why are you so uncomfortable? Because when people always ask how the hell could Germany stand by and do this stuff. It's because Hitler was that gifted of an oratory. He was able to take the German people and make them do atrocious things that when they woke up from the smoke they're like,

why did I do that? It's like he convinced you to do it. So that's what he did to my girl in a minute, accidentally. I mean, he had to be that good. When you look at a guy telling you how much the Jews are a problem and look that much like a Jew and convince you, you're like, this dude, his speaking, they didn't even notice that he looked like.

He was like blonde hair, blue eyes. He was like, we're the superior people. The kid was a squeak and he fucking, he's like, we're superior, we're superior. We're like, where? You? Yeah. You?

You're five six. I was like, you, look at your fucking art, dude. It sucks. You look like you're a fucking accountant. And he's like, where's the people? And he was a vegetarian. Yeah. Yeah.

Really? Yeah, why? Dude, if I put on paper, if I put on paper, vegetarian, loves animals, and great speaker, and then I put on the other one, eats meat, really uncomfortable to be around, and wants to kill everybody, and I said which one's a good guy, which one's a bad guy,

you would obviously say, oh, the guy who eats meat, wants to kill everybody, is the bad guy. I'd be like, no, that's Winston Churchill. And then the good guy that you thought on paper was Hitler. Oh, Churchill wanted to kill everybody. Well, that's what some people... Churchill really hated Indians, so I don't fuck with Churchill. That's what I'm saying.

He really hates Indians. That's why, that's why, that's why I made, that's why I made unblinking eye contact with him when I said Churchill. I wanted you to feel it. He wasn't too fond, right? He did not like it. Yeah. The Holy British Empire. No, he hated him.

He's got weird roots. Yeah. He did not like it. Yeah. The Holy British Empire, he's got little roots. Yeah. He did not like you guys. Yeah. I mean, I guess it's bad time to finish what Churchill said about the Greeks then. What did he say? He said, from here on in,

we will no longer say that Greeks fight like heroes. I get chills when I think about it. We will say that heroes fight like Greeks. Yes. Okay, hold on. Big one. Yeah, it just, I love it. Yeah. Okay, hold on. Big one. Yeah, John is coming. I love it.

Yeah. He said that. He said that. And he failed against the Turks like the Greeks as well. Why do you think he would say that? He did. He would have a story failure more and more. Really, I mean.

Why do you think that is? Because, you know, the muzzies are just tricky, dawg. Okay, why? The muzzies are tricky. Who's trickier, though? Right. The muzzies are. They're's trickier though? Right. Muzzies are, they're good. They're good.

Muzzies by the way. They're good. Muzzy, they're the science, the best scientists since antiquity, always the cleanest people, right? Like in the Crusades, you always talk about the, you know, you read these accounts and it's like, the Muslims would say they could smell the Christian army coming from miles away.

Yeah, because they'd just bark bare. No, they had good, they had good, they had Janissaries, so what they would do, you always gotta unify but conquer, unify in the right ways, divide in the right ways. So what the Ottomans would do is they would take a Christian boy, young, from the family, and then they would indoctrinate him and turn him Muslim,

and then he would go kill other Greeks so they were like Manchurian candidate fucking brainwashed kind of like King Z you know Z Z's got an interesting story that's why he makes he's so dangerous to me. Who's Z? King Z dog. Bow down. I don't know who King Z is. You don't know who Z is? You know who King Z is? Zoran? You guys are gonna know real soon. Zoran Mumdani? I call him King Z, but he's Z. The President of China. Z. Oh, Z. I don't do the whole zi zi zi. Z.

Tomato, tomato, who's the Z? The thing is with us is we're fucking Chinese. Here's the thing. I don't say, hello. I say, hello. Did I say, hello? I'm not speaking Chinese. Here's the thing about us.

It says Z to me. It says Z and an I. Here's the thing. You want me to do Z and Z? I don't think it's X and I. X, X, and Z. I'm stupid. No, no, no.

What it is, what it is is- It says it's a Z and an I. You wanna do G and Z and I. I thought it was X and I. X, X, and G. Same shit, I'm stupid. No, no, no, what it is, what it is is. X, Y is xylophone in your defense. Isn't it ZI? No, it's XI. What we call Yanis is Yanni almost, because Yanni will have a great point

as he's about to make, and then one thing will be almost off. Yeah, I've noticed. And then as historians, we are both almost there. Like I'll give you an excellent point, well researched about Greek mythology and give you points that will wrap around into present day America, but I will accidentally

the entire time be calling Plato, Pluto. And that's just what it is. That's just how we are. So his story is very interesting because his father was like killed by the communists. And then he was taken as a kid and indoctrinated much like a Janissary to love the communist party and then he was taken as a kid and indoctrinated much like a janissary to love the communist party and stuff like that. The ottomans would do this with the women too

wouldn't they all take like orphan girls and that's who the uh they would take boys too this is a true story they would impregnate the orphan girls yeah so it wouldn't be one bloodline and like one royal family right there was like a harem of all these orphan girls so sometimes the kids were like jewish or muslim crit didn't matter it was kind of an interesting way to like continue a bloodline but there was like a harem of all these orphan girls. So sometimes the kids were like Jewish or Muslim, crit didn't matter. It was kind of an interesting way to like continue a bloodline. But it would take boys too.

It took boys too. Because back in the day, back in ancient history, everybody was for the table. It's true. You took everybody, everybody, it didn't matter, boy, girl, you just can get eaten sexually. I thought you had a tooth fill out, but it was really a sesh.

It was just a sesh, it was a sesh. You sesh kids, a sesh. It was just a sesh. It was a sesh. You sesh kids. Love sesh. Disclosure? I have invested in a company. Disclosure, FTC. We're disclosing, okay?

Continue. In sesh? You have to disclose. You better disclose. You've got to disclose. We've got to disclose. Because if not, Dan Bongino will take a look at this. You were saying though.

I'm saying I want a sponsorship of sesh on the history. Well, we don't do sponsorship. You can invest. I will fucking invest. Yeah, I'll take a look at that. He's on that match. So when he was saying though, you were saying I want a sponsorship of Sash on the history here. Well, we don't do sponsorship. You can invest, you know what I mean? I will fucking invest. Yeah, I know you will. I believe. You're a property owner.

I got some property. But you were going to say about Z. So I told you about Z. You were finished? No, I was going to say about my grandfather. It's a true story, I swear to God. So we did Z's of Michigan. Why don't we talk about Xi Jinping? Xi Jinping punk? Yeah. I swear to God so yeah Which is easy

Jinping So my daughter went to an Ivy League school, yeah, that's what people say Oh, how could it be that bad as door went to Ivy League school like yeah, she's trying yeah Why do you think she's a couple teachers smuggle like some chemical weapons in? Why do you think she's a couple teachers smuggle like some chemical weapons in 100% insane? They were gonna kill the crops Dude, it's crazy. And then I think I think Trump in this most recent Agreement with China allowed them to have the students here again. Yeah, a lot of Donnie flip-flops. I don't like this because listen, dude, it's like People can't stop the Chinese You can't stop the Chinese. It's like saying, if you're gonna say there's no more Chinese in the NBA,

that's like saying no more blacks in the NBA. I mean, they are the blacks for Ivy Leagues. Well, it's true. Come on, come on, come on, come on. And Indians. Indians too. But Chinese really, I mean. No, don't do it.

No, Indians are the best. Dude, look at India and Pakistan, they can't even get a plane off the ground and they got the most nukes of anyone in India. Indian scientists. And these guys are just making nukes. That's why India sucks, we're making nukes. Indians are killing it too.

I love Indians. All right guys, let's take a break for a second. Today's episode is sponsored by Acorns. Acorns is a financial wellness app that helps you take control of your money with simple tools making it easy to start saving and investing for your future. Financial wellness is possible and Acorns gives you small simple steps to get you and your money on track. Acorns will recommend a diversified portfolio that matches you and your money goals. You don't need to be rich.

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on the Apple app and Google Play stores. That says something. Buy your next car today with CarGurus at CarGurus.ca. Go to CarGurus.ca to make sure your big deal is the best deal. That's C-A-R-G-U-R-U-S dot C-A. CarGurus.ca. So my dad's family was from Inveros, right? So it was a part of the Ottoman Empire. So they actually sent my dad to Egypt, to Alexandria, because the local viceroy, I don't know what the, I can't remember what the Ottomans called it,

but he was basically. The governor. Yeah, governor of this place. He would rape Greek boys, that was his thing. Oh really? He was into it, yeah. Why is that, why is that being consistent throughout history? I thought you were about to say, why that bad?

No, no, it just seems like a consistent thing with the Greeks, it's like, what is it so special about you? It's not consistent with the Greeks. Hairless assholes. No, the Ottomans were doing it. The Greeks are hairless? That's the interesting thing about them. They don't have hair everywhere but the asshole. Oh, so they're like a chimpanzee. Exactly.

Interesting. I get it. That makes sense. That makes a lot of sense. That's why they're prime candidates. And Koreans people have genes where they don't smell. Koreans do not smell, can't smell, no BO, stinkless people. That's why they make the best ladyboys too, Asians, because they're starting with an advantage with no hair, so they're more believable. They don't gotta give it all that. So you were saying your dad got sent away.

Your dad raped a Greek boy. My dad raped a Greek boy. So they sent him to Alexandria, so he never saw his family again. To avoid being raped. To avoid being raped. So he was like the, I guess he was like the Moses. Does your dad have brothers?

Huh? Does your dad have brothers? And how did the family pick his asshole to save? Because he might've been the cutest. Might've been the cutest. Here's the thing with being Greek too. How did you spend the cutest? Is gay will touch you,

it's gonna get you one way or another. Like it, Yanni's got one of three, now one of his brothers is fully gay, like full out of the closet. Which we call fully charged. Actual fully charged. Three dollar bill. Has sex with men.

And then Yanni was nicked. I was nicked. Yanni was nicked by the gay gene, not fully gay, but not fully straight. What does that mean? How did you figure that out? I got nicked just because of my tastes. I mean, I dress up in a dress and put a wig on.

Yeah, think about the most famous things ever done. I. I don't think she males are that gay. No, I mean there's certain things We actually proved that Yanni proved it to me scientifically why masturbating to trans porn is actually the most manly thing you do And it's the solution because he showed me an article and then we spent hours speaking about it where he said that This is a neurological thing. When you watch porn, the two most excitable parts of the male brain that stimulate your sexual organs are when you see big tits and a big dick. That's what you will subconsciously fast forward through porn if the guy's piece isn't big

enough. So if you connect, combine a big piece and big titties, you have a trans person, that's the type of porn that gets you the most excited and that's what Yana says to me. Or you just have a little bit of an imagination and you just call it a horniness antenna. Well you call it what it really is, it's horny. Or you call it again another version of a loophole.

Yeah. How is it cheating on you, babe, if that's a guy? Yeah. Or was a guy. Or was a guy. It's not gay, you just go, oh my dick was so big it broke through to the other side. Problem solved.

I went right through her. Problem solved. Nobody can look at, you, anyone, I want anyone to look at Carmen Carrera and tell me that's a guy. Oh, what a babe. Pull it out. Tell me that's a guy. Pull it out.

Look at me and tell me that's a guy with a straight face. Even Alex will admit it and those are things that's not easy to admit in his community. But when you know, Alex. We found out, we know what's going on. You're about to see who it is, don't worry. Just go to her Instagram, Carmen Carrera. Don't act like you haven't fucking googled it before.

Look at this kid in glasses. Look at this kid, he looks like a disguised kid. Jesus Christ. Carmen Carrera. This guy looks like a disguise That's not her! Who the hell is that? Pull up a disguised face and look at his face! The disguised face is unbelievable! That's unbelievable! Look at his face! This kid bought his face at a 99 cent store!

You got it on your phone already! Oh my God! That's incredible! Oh my God! This is the! Oh my God! Is that a guy in here? That's incredible. Oh my God. This is the girl from the Joe Budden clip. Is that? You know the one where he finds out on the couples therapy show?

You haven't seen that one? No. No. Al, you know what I'm talking about? Where he turns his head slow? Yeah, he turns his head slow and he's like, what the fuck is going on? So he's in a couples therapy.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, she looks shockingly female. Shockingly female, yeah, yeah. Which one is she on, left? Left, yeah. It's something people gotta accept, you know? Like we can go to Mars, we can cure cancer, we can change our.

Have you ever, have you ever dabbled? No, I haven't dabbled. Would you feel uncomfortable dabbling? No, I mean I'm married, I would. No, obviously in a hypothetical scenario. I mean, you know, it depends. What does it depend on? Yeah, it depends.

If she says yes, then it depends on how I'm concerned. It depends on if I'm fooled. I'm fooled. No, that doesn't count. If you're fooled, it doesn't count. You're saying going into it. You're going into it. Yeah, yeah.

Going into it, absolutely, I wouldn't care. If I see a woman, it's what I'm attracted to, and if she's got a piece, we're just doing something different. When the piece is there. I know we're doing something different tonight. If the piece is there, you're not gonna let the piece stop you.

I guess we're doing something different tonight. So, when you're off. Sometimes you have Italian, sometimes you have Mexican for dinner, you're just doing something different. You like doing something different. You like doing something different. Let me see, have you ever done

a little something different? I've ever done a little something different? I've never done a little something different with a trans person, but I will. I have publicly said that I'd like to go the first 50 years of my life straight and the last 50 gay, I'm an explorer. So I like to explore all types of things. I am not, it's not out of the question. It's not out of the question for me to at some point dabble.

But I don't wanna do it now. I have a beautiful family. I'm a beautiful life a beautiful fiance So I'm not I'm not gonna I'm not gonna risk that yes, so I married it huh And the thing is I got to do it now because I was committed to fucking tranny for 50 years This guy's committed to fucking tranny for 50 years. Before he gets married to his wife. That's what it is. I gotta do it now because now she wants citizenship. John, you're how old are you? 40.

So he's gonna be 10 years and then he's waiting her out. He's waiting her out. Can't do it babe, I'm gay now. This is my 10 years. We get, no we are getting married. We got engaged on January 6th, swear to God. Which is a holiday to a lot of people's houses. They do an AOC pinata, they get zip ties.

Do the whole thing. Yeah, some people's houses, that's a holiday. I will say, it's not out of the question, I'm not looking for it. I don't want to right now, I support whatever people want to do, right now I'm not interested in having. You wouldn't take some head. Hooking up with a trans, listen, like I said, I grew up in now, I'm not interested in having... You wouldn't take some head... Hooking up with a trans... Listen!

Like I said, I grew up in Queens. I've gotten blow jobs from girls with mustaches. But I'm not... You know what I mean? Italian chicks, you know what I mean? You know who you are. Shout out Sabrina Petizzi. But I... I would be! But you get a little bit of a tickle, that's how you came. So I would be I would, I'm not interested now. I'm certainly not interested now. What's the gayest thing you've ever done?

You got mouth fucked when he was 14 years old. Yeah, yeah, being an altar boy. He's told this story on the spot. Yeah, the gay, yeah. Is that the gayest thing you've ever done? I've never really done. I mess around. I begged Mateo Lane to tell me I'm gay and he's like, buddy, you're not gay. I can tell you you're not gay.

It's just a thing that I think I have fun with and it's my comedy. Well, I think. And being Catholic, I think we're all just all Boy Catholic high schools. It's like you would get teabagged or teabag someone and if they didn't laugh, you'd be like, what are you, gay? It's like, no, I'm traumatized. I think everyone lies, dude. I think everyone lies. I really do. Wait, beis, question. You're having sex with a trans person

or whatever. Penis is there. Okay hold on, let me get my dick out. Penis gets hard, you're charged up. Yeah. What are you doing? My penis gets hard as I'm charged up? No, no, that girl with the penis, the penis gets erect as I assume it would because she's turned on. Sort of funny. Are you putting your mouth on that dick or no? Am I putting, oh, that's a good question. Because you're all horny, you know what I mean? It's there. Probably. You're already, yeah, okay.

Yeah. Okay. It says you gotta do something different. I mean, I don't know, I can't, I can't. You know, that's the thing. This is what's interesting about history, what we've learned and what a lot of people have. It's interesting about history.

Seriously. This is what I wanna tell you about the Revolutionary War. Yeah, this is, but seriously, when you look back in history, when you look back in history. This is what we want to tell you about the Revolutionary War. But seriously, when you look back in history, when you look back in history, Greeks really do. Yeah, I'm here lobbying. This is Pride Month, dude. I'm a great spokesperson.

Dude, do you know how many times I've walked into his apartment and he's not recording anything and he's just sitting there with the Marisa wig on? That's what I do. Just sitting there hanging out. I just go, I would fuck me that's right. I would fuck me. Yeah, I would definitely fuck me. Yeah Well, when you look back in history a lot of them manliest guys and a lot of the cultures during these empires There wasn't a concept like we have now of gay and straight. Alexander the Great had a favorite eunuch. He was gay He had a gay lover. He

was gay. Two of the best Roman emperors were gay, like Trajan, Hadrian. These guys were gay. Hadrian was gay? Hadrian was gay. You weren't in a box back then. Now we have all these rules and regulations. There was no rules and regulations back then. You just had a little fun. You don't think there was any rules and regulations? You spun the wheel, but not with sexuality. You spun the wheel. He spun the wheel. He spun the wheel. Oh, it's all the regulation. Yeah, the only rule was don't be a Jew. But everybody was gay back then.

All these guys, if you look, I mean, even at Abraham Lincoln, now it's like, oh, is Abraham Lincoln gay? It's like back then, everybody knew that the president before him, James Buchanan, 100% gay. Really? Buchanan was for sure gay. He did not have a wife. FDR's wife, definitely gay. Definitely 100% gay. 100% gay. Hot Wheels wasn't gay. No, FDR's wife. No, FDR's wife, Eleanor. She was all day sick. She was wearing cargo pants for sure. Just dude, watch Wedding Crash. I mean, Bill Clinton's wipes gay. Oh yeah, white people. Big dick. Yeah, big, run a bunch of that way.

I think people are- So what happened? Why do you think that we're so homophobic now? I think religion, I think religion- But there's always been religion. You can make the argument that there was more religion back then. I think the Abrahamic religions are exceptionally

against homosexuality. Yeah. And there's probably some societal reason. Probably Greeks are doing too much. I think Gave the boy can't consent We weren't the only ones Chinese Dynasty I just want to lump them in because I just want to make it a point that they started slavery.

Make sure everybody knows that. The boys stuff is kind of inexcusable. Yeah, it's kind of hard to understand. Maybe that's how bad the fumes were, the guys had to create alternatives. I think that there was no shaved hair back then and the fumes do get caught in the hair and maybe the guys just were like, you know what, tonight I just no shaved hair back then and the fumes do get caught in the hair. That's fair. And maybe the guys just were like, you know what, tonight I just don't feel like

dealing with the fumes. Well, I think that it's also. I think pregnancy might have been a concern. Pregnancy a concern. Maybe impregnating someone that you don't want to. Yeah. They had condoms back in the day. What's that?

They had condoms. Like what, was it like sheep skin or something? Yeah, it was like a sheep colon or some shit. Yeah. Did you see the Jews for skin? Yeah, I saw the guy. No, but I also think that nowadays, I'm using a sheep's colon, I'll just use a boy's colon.

Turns out that works. That's why he's having sex with them, trying to get that colon, rip it out. The human mind is really crazy. It really is kind of, we're very weird. It's the Greek mind. I don't know how those wires get crossed. It's the Greek mind.

Don't put it on us. But I think that even though there's a lot of problems today, there's more than a million problems going on, ultimately, comparative to the past, you're living a great life. Oh, absolutely. So now you have a lot of time to get enraged at who's gay and who's not. Back then, it's like, you're either gonna die in the war,

you're gonna die of polio, somebody's gonna kill you. So you're like, do you care if your president's sexual proclivities? Nobody cared. They were like, how often was a town getting sacked back in the day? Oh, dude. Always understated that. What did that look like?

You have a town that's probably a few hundred people living in it. A lot of grape juice. Yeah. A lot of grape juice. R.I.P. He means we cut. Oh, sorry. He just didn't want to repeat the words.

I'm just wondering. You're doing your thing. You're farming. You're doing whatever. I'm looking at him in then my face some army shows Up. Yeah, well, I see is a shirt Like how regular was that happening it was so regular man So so was like cotton was conquering that hard

Like and we give all this credit for like Alexander the great like going to conquer all these places But it was it really just showing up with more guys. Yeah, let's stick it to the Greeks dude. You're talking about Identify as Greek Macedonia is Greek He was the Floyd Mayweather of Congress. I also think Philip apparently did a lot of, he set up a lot of that shit and then died. He was a little bit of a nepo baby. But he took it to another level. He's like the Steph Curry. You know, his dad was Del Curry, but he was the Steph Curry.

You know what I was thinking about? And he was Greek as fuck. How did they know with these big land masses, like how did they know where the other army was going to be? There's got to be like one road. Yeah, but couldn't I, I feel like even that, like how did they know where the other army was going to be? There's got to be like one road. Yeah, but couldn't I, I feel like even that, like how would I know, like, oh, how does Genghis Khan know it's like they're going to be there? You follow the river. You think? People live on the river, yeah.

Yeah, you just kill them all, I guess. That's what you think. I don't think there was like a phoenix back in the day, like where they just make a place in the middle of the desert. I think everything's by a body of water. You follow the body of water, eventually run into some people, take over their town. Right, right. That's what we did. We just conquered each other over and over again. That's what I'm trying to wonder. It's like you're this town, there's 300 people.

The Ottomans come in, they're like, we're in charge. You go, well, will you protect us from these people that are raiding? They go, yeah, we'll do it. I'm like, okay, you guys are in charge. You do it. I wonder if it was that much actual battle. But that's the problem with culture. And we're giving all this credit to these people who've won all these wars, but if you're

winning a war against someone who's not even really fighting back, they're just like, hey, just protect us. I've always suspected that because when you think about the tales of Alexander the Great being in the front. It's like you would never be in the front if you were actually going to die. Did you just tell your scribe, he was probably on the back on his horse, just like, just put me in the front. That looks bad up because you're in the front. Did you just tell your scribe? He was probably on the back on his horse, just like, just make it, just put me in the front. Like, that looks bad up, because you're in the front.

You can't believe any of the old history shit. I don't even know if you could believe, like, revolution shit. Yeah. I mean, we know who won, but that's why Tyler Hero has the best theory right now. You heard what he said. I don't believe that history.

He says he doesn't believe in history. He does not. He said it in the dumbest way, but he's not exactly wrong. Where it's just like whoever wins kind of like writes it in the way that's most favorable. And then we just make movies about that and that's solidified.

Just read a book or Google or like do some research on whatever history you believe. Read the opposition side. Like read American history from the Nazi side, from the British side. Read it, no I'm saying, read it from their side and then you get a clearer picture of like, wow, what actually happened

because it's just two versions of the same story. Yeah, what do the Brits say about the Revolutionary War? The Brits say about the Revolutionary War, when you look at the British, they say that they fought, they wanted to, you know, these colonies, the 13 colonies, which still is just the best landmass in the world I really genuinely only fucked with the 13 colonies. I like the American 13 colleagues when I go other guy was just in New Mexico

It's like this wasn't part of the plan I know it's American now, but it's like I get there and I'm like the people were fine But it's like dude and then I'm there and Santa Fe the capital. I love state capitals I love taking pictures from the state capitals, I love taking pictures in front of state capitals, a little autistic, and I like it, but I'm there in Santa Fe, and it's like these people with the no kings thing, they're doing the no kings protest, and it's like guys, you're not even really a place. Like, you're not even really a state,

and it's like I have to see, and it brings out these protests, brings out the most nuts people, like have you ever seen a trans Native American person? It blows your fucking mind. They've had those forever though. That was kind of their those forever though yeah the two-spirit please it's trans Native American was disclosed we're disclosing by the way closing yeah yeah but um but anyway so so anyway these 13 colonies their British believed that you know we got a fight for them we want them there's an uprising here blah

blah blah and then when it became not financially good for the British anymore, they just left. So yes, France came and helped. That's called losing a war. Right, but no, but there was like, Britain was fighting like 10 other wars at the time of the Revolutionary War. So even the soldiers that the 13 colonies were fighting

were not the best of the best of Britain. Britain was fighting in India. That's what they would say, of course. Right, but. Because they would send their best to India where they don't even have weapons. Yeah. They have to keep the elephants.. Britain was fighting in India. That's what they would say, of course. Right, but. Because they would send their best to India where they don't even have weapons. Yeah. They have elephants.

But India is worth a lot. And so, but they, the British would say, hey, they let, you know, France came, we left, whatever. It wasn't, we were losing too much money trying to hold on to these colonies. So let them, let them go. Because what we, like, you know about, we know about 1776, we know about that war,

our American Revolution, we beat the mighty British. All these things are true, with little quirks here and there. But then you don't really learn much about the War of 1812. Why? Because the British beat us. But the War of 1812, in Britain, you learn about that. But in America, that's a day. You gotta research the War of 1812.

What happened in the War of 1812 that they beat us? The British basically knocked us, it wasn't about territory, the war of 1812 was, you know, like we got the Louisiana Purchase out of that, like Thomas Jefferson. But Jefferson worked that out with the French. Yeah, with the French, but the British, what a deal. I mean, that's how you know it.

That might be the greatest real estate deal in history. He had some Jewish advisors for that deal. My God, we'll give you a deal, we'll give you the whole land, you know it. That might be the greatest real estate deal in history. He has some Jewish advisors for that deal. My God, we'll give you a good deal. We'll give you the whole land. You know what's crazy? Pack a ziggurat and some belts. It's very good. You know what's crazy about the Louisiana Purchase

is like, I always think about this, like whoever the smartest person is, I don't know, Elon Musk, right? Whoever the top person is. He's the highest person. They know, like if we look, people 200 years from now are gonna look back at whatever is worth thinking and be like, remember when they used to think like that,

idiots, because it's just what it is. Thomas Jefferson, sitting active president of the United States, get the Louisiana Purchase, has Lewis and Clark in his office and says, guys, gonna go out there, I want you to explore this territory, okay, I want you to take extra people and extra weapons, we know there's Native Americans out there,

we know this can be crazy terrain, there also could be dinosaurs. Absolutely could be dinosaurs, so we gotta just be careful. And so at that point, they literally, Thomas Jefferson, the president was like, yeah, there could be a T-Rex out there, running around Louisiana. So that always fascinated me, because I don't know,

I'm actually just buying time, because I forgot why Britain won the war before, but I just know they won. Isn't that how you get people excited to just go to the middle of nowhere and get bone arrows shot at them? You go, listen guys, I need you to go over here and there's no civilization whatsoever, but you might see a dinosaur. Doesn't that seem like you kind of propagandize people moving out west?

Maybe, but they didn't know any better yet. Like I don't think in 200 years from now we're gonna be eating meat. I think they're gonna look at us and be like, what a bunch of barbarians. That's so sad, I think about that a lot. They were, remember when they used to eat animals and not understand that their consciousness

is like the same as ours? Yeah. You know? Yeah, well, I hope that never happens. Yeah, I don't know if that will happen. I want it to be smash burgers. And because technology will be to the point that there will be some lab-grown shit

that will taste the exact same. Oh, there already is. I can't believe. And then what's gonna be funny is they look at our heroes and they're like that guy Yeah, he ate meat. He killed animals the same way we look at like slave owners 200 years ago Yeah, I think they're gonna do that with our guys now in 20 years But that guy that guy killed so many just ate meat whenever you wanted to whoever Oh, yeah, I remember you ever think here was good Obama or something. Yeah first black president They're gonna pull Joe Rogan clips and be like this guy killed bears, dude Whoever. Oh, yeah, I remember. Whoever the heroes are. Let's get Obama or something. Yeah. Like first black president. They're gonna pull Joe Rogan clips

and be like, this guy killed bears, dude. Yeah, yeah. This guy is a monster. What a scumbag. Yeah, yeah, yeah. We have to take the statue of him in Austin, damn. Yeah, yeah. All right, guys, let's take a little break for a second,

talk about these NBA finals. I think OKC wraps it up. I know, I know. Game five, I think the Pacers had their shot and fucked it over. Game four it was. They could've gone up three-one. Yeah. And they fucked it.

What happened to Tyrese? I don't know, he's hurt, but he's zero points in the first half, just don't play at that point. What was the injury, David, that Tyrese Halliburton had? It's interesting because if they lose, nobody remembers this playoff run. It is one of the great playoff runs by an NBA basketball player in history.

Like, yeah, stole multiple games, game winners, fantastic outings, and OKC is going to win and then none of those mean anything. Yeah. It's kind of crazy. And no one cares that OKC has won. Yeah. It's Oklahoma City. Shout out OKC though.

Like, there's no reason that team should be good based on like any metric in terms of like a small market team With limited budget. Yeah, no NBA stars want to go play there and they find a way to All always be in it. Yeah, just a bunch of young boys, bro But they were they did it back with the the young Russell West James Harden. What is that, just front office? I think it's. That guy Sam Prestes. They're just nice. They get it, they draft well.

They know the only chance they have is drafting well. And then when they have to make some big trades, they just, they go all in. And they'll sign role players, like Hartenstein was perfect for what they needed. Alex Caruso is perfect for what they needed. We could have used some Hartenstein. Like a guy who won't turn the big that won't turn the ball over

Can kind of dribble and will play D any contender could use Alex Caruso how you don't pay that guy? Yeah, just great. He didn't sound like a massive. He says something funny. He was a There's a guy Jalen Turner who's like the other star on the team. Yeah, he was saying like man I'll everybody saying Alex Cruz is this great defender I'll be cooking him in practice or something like that. And he goes Alex says Yeah, once I got an NBA contract extension. I haven't been putting as much effort in my practice Jalen Williams, sorry Okay, see just defensively is the ad and they're everywhere dominant. Yeah. Yeah, and, yeah. Sorry, sorry, sorry. Well, OKC just defensively is just... Yeah, they're everywhere....dominant, huh?

Yeah, yeah. And they have like, they have guys that can bring the ball up fast. Like I love Jalen Brunson, I love him. I run faster than him. Right. I can run faster straight than Jalen Brunson. And he could barely bring the ball up against the Pacers. I can run faster than him in a straight on race.

At 41 years old. At 41 years old. I think at 51 I'll be able to run faster. I think we need to bring Jalen Brunson on the podcast and do this. I love Jalen. What's his 40s on the podcast? Jalen. We would love for Jalen. Jalen, let's cut a promo. Jalen Brunson, Andrew Schultz, global phenomenon comedian, says he is faster than you, global phenomenon NBA star. Yeah, straight up race, full race, straight up full race. 92 feet, end to end basketball court, 93, whatever it is. Before you do cat cows or after? You said distance, he says he will beat you in a straight line race.

No, I need to do my cat cows. I need to do my jogging. I need to do all my stretches, cat cows. If it's cold, no cat cows, I think you're in trouble. Come on, flagrant. We will do this. I genuinely believe it, just straight up. I'm not saying that I'm a better basketball player.

No, no, no, no, no, no, no, we know that. We know that. We don't think you're saying something different. I genuinely believe it just straight up. I'm not saying that I'm a better basketball player Something I'm not saying that he's better than me at basketball. I think he's a better shooter I think he better dribbler. I think they use his body way better. Like it's amazing what he can do being so limited with speed. I Think I've been faster than Jalen Brunson since I was 14 years old I mean that can I mean that's a hundred percent. So you told me 21 year old you could beat him in a foot race, there's no way of knowing. You barely beat five foot nothing Taylor from Brilliant Idiots. I think she's a drag star. I think she could beat him.

I think Taylor could beat... Wait, didn't he beat her ass and she pulled a hamstring? Barely. I think he beat the shit out of her and she pulled a hamstring. It's funny. Let's call it like it is. He beat Taylor's ass. She ended up just getting pregnant.

She was so, she was like, there's nothing else. I just got to settle down. I just got to settle down. I just got to settle down. With all due respect. With all due respect. I do not think you'll be Jalen Brunson in a foot race. I think in a foot race.

At 41 with a bad ankle. Two. Son, you got that thing with the wood thing that you got to stand on. I know, I do it every single time. It's like, I got that thing with the wood thing that you got a stand on I know I do it every single time It's like I got a stretch out the Achilles. I have to do a proper stretch of everything, but I'm saying in a foot race We're not dribbling a basketball if we're dribbling basketball I think it'd be me, but if we're just in a foot race Yes, and it was just go start here and get to there as long as it's

Enough distance where I could pick up speed. Okay, 100 meters. It's not even close. Okay, okay. We have to make this happen. I mean that sincerely. Jalen, you're in New York, it's the off season, it's a part of your training. Let's do it. I don't even think it's close.

If you want to bet on that, hey, Stake, no. I'll bet everything. Let's have Stake set up a fucking, let's have Stake set up a bet. I think he's a better basketball player than me. I just want to point this out. I'm not out here saying, like, I knew that I could beat Jason Williams when I played him one on one. I knew that that would happen, because I think I'm a better.

If he gave you seven in a game to eight. It doesn't matter. Like, if he gave me four, I would have done it. I did what it was needed to be done. Oh, shit. I did what was needed to be done. Oh, shit. I didn't ask for it.

He gave it to me. I was like, OK, I'll make it interesting. I think, I think. Coles is a psycho competitor. I saw him do a 10 minute plank one time. No training, just out of nowhere. It was 11 minutes and 48 seconds. For no reason.

For nothing, on the line. And he was like, I'm gonna do a plank for 11 minutes. Well, because somebody said that they could outplank me and they busted first. Okay, but. I'm actually impressed by that. That's on all the tests. You were there, I think, actually.

Really? Yeah, we can't exactly say who it is. It's incredibly impressive. Yeah, yeah. But I'll put my body on the line. David Brunson is a top five NBA player, quite possibly, if not six, seven. Top five to me. I mean, I think he's so good. Like I said, he's better than me at basketball. What I'm saying is in a straight-on race. I am better than him. Mm-hmm This is a future Olympic athletes. It's just genetics. It's like do you have fast twitch or not? I have more fast twitch Okay, I also have long legs. I have a lot of advantages. They're unfair. I'm all legs. My twitches are Jalen's twitches are much can he slow down faster than me? Yeah If it was who can get to the fastest speed and then slow down, there's a brick wall in front of you Jalen's twitches are much can he slow down faster than me? Yeah If it was who can get to the fastest speed and then slow down, there's a brick wall in front of you Jalen

I'm going through the brick wall. I'm going through the brick wall 100% he's I would say he's a better athlete Reluctantly I would say Lateral quickness he got you. Oh my god. I don't even know if I have that anymore. Okay, actually Quickness, he got you. Oh my God, I don't even know if I have that anymore. Okay. Actually. Glad you brought this up. No, no, no, I think he's got me on that.

No, he's got me on everything, pretty much in terms of basketball. You're pretty good side to side. I am pretty good side to side. I'm just saying. Yeah, I am pretty good side to side. No, but in just a straight race, I'm beating him. Put it this way.

I could D him up like 94 feet. Like I could do the, I could full court press against Jalen and I wouldn't be like worried. Like yes he would get in front and body me, but I could just run back around him. It would take him eight seconds to get the ball up. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Against me. I don't believe that a lot. The other stuff I believe.

Okay. Anyway, Stake, you can put some money on that. You know, Stake is the leader in global betting in US social casinos, been on top sports and political events, and used the promo code flagrant for your welcome bonus. Now, let's get back to the show. What do you think happens with AI, Yanis? Wow.

This is the generation right now. Dude, Gen Zers, when you look in Gen Zers eyes right now. What do you see? I see they are shell shocked. This is the generation that you're being told there's going to be no jobs when they grow up. They got all this World War III stuff going on. Their whole lives are recordable.

So they're scared to make a mistake, right? Because their big thing is they don't want to be cringe. That's so cringe. So one moment can define their whole life. So they're just walking around scared to live. They're scared to live. This is the first time, I have daughters and my daughter's someday gonna be like,

what should I be when I grow up? And I'm gonna be like, you got nice feet. Be a foot model on OnlyFans. Because I know that'll be there. So it's like, I can't say. But some AI person will be able to figure it out. Yeah, but then there'll be a fetish for human feet. And my girls, that'll be indistinct.

I gotta be honest with her. No, but that's crazy. I know, but that's fun about that. Like, what do you tell your kids when they go, I wanna be this when you grow up, and you go, that job might not exist. Well, I never considered that. You look for a job that's way down the line.

Like, I'm telling my daughters already, I got a three-year-old in ten-year-old, I'm saying, plumbers, be plumbers because AI's not gonna be able to do plumbing, plumbers not coming into your house for an AI version of a robot, plumbers not coming into your house for another 10 years, I mean another 100 years I would say,

plumbers are coming through, so I think they should do trade skills. I would have my kids go to a trade school over an Ivy League school all day long. You think they're not gonna have like sewer systems? No, no, I'm saying in the sewer systems or like maybe they have some type of AI technology that can snake your toilet,

but that guy's gonna have to come in. I'm telling you dude, I'm telling my daughters to be plumbers or some type of tray. There's not gonna be nano robots that you can just dump in there and they take it. You're not letting them into your house. Yeah.

There's gonna be discrimination against fucking robots. Oh yeah, that's what's going to be. I'm actually excited about AI because this is going to get rid of our division. We're all going to come together versus them. White, black, Spanish, trans, Chinese, it don't matter. We're going to be up and that's why I think it's good for all businesses, not now. We've got to get through this storm. But then eventually there's going to be a major need for, I want the human version of

that. I want the human feet. I want the human script. I want the human plumber. I want the human plumber, yeah. Do you feel that way with teeth now? Like you see an actor with real teeth, like they don't have veneers. It is nice.

That is nice. You're like, oh, I believe this character is a working class guy. And then when you see one of these actors that has like these perfect veneers, you're like, I don't think you're working at the shop. And I wonder if like authenticity comes back in a major way, however we can find it. I think so.

You're like, seeing things that are a little bit broken. The music that's going to come out is going to be this perfect version of everything. Like, well, what if early recordings of hip hop in the 90s where you could kind of hear the reverberation of the speakers. I wonder if that is, in the same way vintage clothing is kind of cool to this generation, because they're like, oh, this was this real moment. I wonder if that manifests in all art. I think you're right.

I think, whoa, I agree with you. I think that's what's good. It's already the unique experience. Like, seeing people on screens is like nothing now. Now going to see someone live is like what being on TV used to be. Oh, that's interesting. So the live experience is not replicatable by AI.

So we want to go do live things, but live shit is so fucking expensive now that people are kind of like hesitant. Well, lower your fucking prices, dude. I'm not on a road. That's true. Yeah, yeah. Smart to not be on the road right now.

Why, is the road rough right now? Yeah, it's not great. So I wonder, I had a theory about this with comedy, actually. I think that like, I think that bubble has subsided a little bit. Yeah, well you can tell that by our ticket sales. Yeah, we feel that. Go check out Yonis and Chris on the road.

Go see Property Owner! No, but I think there's a version of it like, I remember, I remember, I remember Shane and I were doing a show in Canada and it was an outdoor show and there was fucking like 40,000 people. People were sitting on a bridge watching the show from the bridge, right? And I was like, yeah, this is the end of it.

Like this is, it should never be this big. And it has to kind of come down. It doesn't mean it comes all the way down, but I think that like after COVID, everybody wants to be outside, they want to laugh, comedy dominated the culture, the most influential person in the world loves comedy. And because of that, there's like, you know,

interest in the people that he influences obviously Rogan and I think everybody got those experiences and I think for a little bit now they're just like all right we're cool we we saw we saw four or five shows yeah and then I don't think it goes away entirely but I think there's a little bit of a reset 100% gonna be a purge yeah oh you think it's purge there's just we're just gonna there's gonna be some what are're cutting the fat or whatever. Certain comics are gonna sustain, and you're just gonna see things kind of.

That's why I think the comedy clubs, like I know there's a lot of people that like, they can't wait to get out of comedy clubs. Comedy clubs. I love comedy clubs. I can't wait to go back to them. No, comedy clubs, because that's what thrives during this time.

It's like going to do a show, like don't get me wrong, the arenas are fucking awesome. It's amazing etc But tell me about it. I don't I Love them. They're incredible Like I don't think anybody gets tired of seeing their favorite comic with 200 people in a room. It's 300 people That's like the audience one thing I realized to the audience Doesn't really care about the difference like if you want wanna go do a theater or an arena, it's amazing, obviously you make money, big people, but then you run the risk of like someone sitting

in section 10,000 that was like, oh I didn't even really think he was that funny, and it's not the performance, like you were distracted, you were so irresponsible. You gotta make the show for them. Like that was the thing when we were on the road. Right, that's a lot of pressure. It's like, when we did, when we were doing these big venues,

it was like very intentional. How do you make the show so those people up there can experience it as close to those people down there? And I think a lot of people just go, oh, I do comedy shows in comedy clubs. Now I'm gonna theater 5,000 people. I'll just do the same thing. And it's like, well, people aren't gonna come back

if that's what you do. It has to change. When you do 50 people in a little one-off room in the city, it's gonna be different than when you do 500 people. Do you remember going to your first, like, Funny Bone, where it was like 500 people? Yeah. And do you remember, like, your jokes feeling thin?

Yeah. Like, you're like, whoa, this is a little bit different. Like, when there was 200 people packed in the cellar, I'm ripping, and all of a sudden, it feels a little bit distant, right? So I think there has to be that adjustment. I think it just exploded, and I'm curious what happens the next five years.

Yeah, well, it's definitely gonna recede for sure. Yeah. Because you're right, it's gotten to the peak. Yeah. So like Steve Martin said in his book when he went to the stadium and he was like, this is what I knew, this was not comedy anymore. Sustainable.

Yeah, this is crazy, yeah. Yeah, it was like, it became a part of people's identity to like like comedy, want to see comedy, less than it was, I just like that person, I want to be there. Do you know what I mean? Yeah, I know exactly what you mean. It's almost like football in Europe.

Like I gotta go see Man U, because that's my team and I gotta do it. Like comedy was people's team in a lot of ways. And I think like now it goes, if I really like that person, I need to go see them. And the problem is too, mention the economy, it's like you might have, they might really wanna go see you,

but for other comics who are on similar, similar universes and podcasts, they went and saw them, and they're like, I just don't have the money, I really would love to see you. And maybe that year you don't get picked, because they just saw you 18 months ago. So you come back in the other one. But I think the comedy clubs too,

it's also, I personally like just, we were doing comedy 15 years, 20, 50, like we've been doing it a long time. Now it's like I realized like I'd rather do the packed comedy club or small theater because then I feel like a comic. I know there's more money getting bigger like that. But I've also said to myself, well, also time is money

and I got kids now, so it's like, do I wanna go on a world tour? If I was gonna do it, I would do it once and I would try to bring my family as much as possible because I love the art of standup. I will do standup all day till I die, hopefully soon. And I, but I hate the road. I do not care about performing in any other city

I couldn't care less how the room is how the vibe is. I like being in New York I like being home at my family if my family's with me, I'll go anywhere if they're not with me I would truly love to just do it here as much as I can because I don't I Never considered the road. I started comedy for at a family. Once you have a family you're like big change Yeah, what like I got to miss my kid's recital? I know I'm making money and it's for them, but it's like, is it for them? My parents didn't leave me any money.

Moved to Vegas, my boy. Yeah, well, I mean, that's what happens. Well, my girl can't leave state lines. That'll change when you marry her in nine years. I'm gonna keep finding ways to push it back. Buy in time, baby. You're back in clubs, because I put off theaters for like a year and a half. I think I'm finally going 2026. I do the theaters now where I can really do the theaters, where I can, where if it's like I can easily sell it out or you're adding shows at the theater, like New York, Boston, Chicago theater, I'll do it because those I can do it there, but the other places, why?

Do the theaters where you can add shows. That's what I'm saying. That's what I'll tell a lot of guys, it's like a lot of people are so excited to do a theater, they don't realize you make less money in the theater. Yes. So they're just excited to do it so that they're saying you're doing a theater,

and that is like a cool accolade as a comedian. I remember coming up to that, oh one day I'm gonna be able to perform in a theater, right? But if you don't mind doing the thing, if you don't mind doing a few shows, then wait until you're doing multiple theaters. For me, I'm- For me- The readers are sick, I'm not gonna lie. I don't want to seem like I'm bagging, like, it's fucking unbelievable. It was like- Well, the way you do it, it's like fucking John Cena's coming out. Explosion. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I would just come out there

and be like, hey guys, and they'd be like, what the fuck? Well, that's what you can, because then they, then I feel like they get upset at that. Yeah. So I should come out there and be like, hey guys, and they'd be like, what the fuck? Well that's what you can't, because then I feel like they get upset at that. Yeah, so I should come out in like a toga? No, just, no, put like, spend the money. Like, it costs tens of thousands of dollars to put those fucking screens up. But that's the difference between somebody way back there who like spent all the money they saved up for a month

to go to the show enjoying it and not. And if I was them, and I saved up money for a month to go see the show show and then I couldn't even really see to act, I'd be fucking pissed off too. So the idea at least for us is like, how do we make sure that every single one comes back? And so far, you know, knock on wood, that's been, you know, the case. So yeah, arenas and if you could do them, I mean, it's just obviously, it's a big show financially, you just make so much money. But for me, when I'm on the road, I just look at the money I make on the road

as freedom coupons to be back with my family. So if I'm gonna go do a theater and make way less money, I'm always gonna pick the club because I'm like, this means that I don't have to go on the road for the next two weekends. That's really all I care about. Like the moment you gave me an opportunity to make a full living, not leaving New York City,

I would take it immediately. That's called podcasting. Well, I feel like I have it already. I feel like I could do that already, but it's just you convince yourself to stay in the treadmill. So that's why I like to just say publicly a lot, because then I like when my girl hears it and tells us, were you doing that already with your podcast?

You can just do that already. So why are you going on the road? I'm like, you know, because I'm an idiot. The point is, I don't know, the point of the podcast, I think is like, it gives you the freedom to do stand-up how you want to do it. Yeah, but I want to do it how I want to do it in New York. Yeah, and if you can do it that way.

I guess, to me, like, the freedom of making money and providing yourself on the pod means that, like, you don't have to go do stand-up when you don't want to. And doing stand-up as, like, a job, meaning, like, you have to go to this place you don't want to do, seems to me like, I don't know, we did it for 10 years of our lives growing up. I don't want to perform for people when I don't want to.

I want to be excited. I can't wait to get back in that market and I got new stuff for them and I'm excited to share it. We were actually talking about this on the way over here where you're walking, we walked like what, 20, 30 city blocks. We got our steps in. We got our steps in. And it's like the love that you feel from the people in New York walking around,

oh, hi, Enos, you guys are back. What's up? And then even the financial aspect of it, like, I mean, the creative aspect of it, number one, like how free we are, say whatever we want, do whatever we want, make the jokes we want. Then the financial aspect of it, we're like, oh, you have to consciously tell yourself like you have it already. Like there's not more out there to get.

It's like you convince yourself, I need this. Once I get this, this will happen. It's like, no, you have it or we have it already. Do you feel sometimes like you don't have it? Is that what you're saying? No, well, I think sometimes I feel that it's because of my kids, I feel, oh, I gotta go out there and do so much more for them.

I gotta leave them with something. But then I realized I was left with nothing. My mom and dad don't have any money and I'm fine. The tools that I'll give them to be able to self-start anything in their life and go after things is what they need. They already have in their accounts more money than I would, because I inherited zero dollars. So they already have a better start than me.

So it's like, what's the treadmill here for? I've been doing it for 15 years. So it's like, just at some point be like, okay. Would you ever take some time off and just like kind of... Like I said, I love the art of comedy. I want to take time off the road. Yeah, that's what I meant. Yeah. At the end of December, I'm, I'm all, I have these shows booked through December. I have, so I have, there's no plan to add anything in 2026.

This is the first time I've, I didn't get to start headlining. I'm way behind y'all. Like 2021, I think I finally was out on the road. So I didn't take a break. Even after my special, I took like a month off and then I was back. You had to wait for Aziz to get canceled. I had to wait for Aziz to get his dick set to Seinfeld. And then there was an Indian spot open.

Yeah. From Hassan to send to Anthrax. And then, and then, and then. I had to wait for all those guys. There was a nice Indian spot open. I had to wait for the Indians. Yeah, for Kumail to start juicing. I kind of massaded that whole thing.

He was on the side like that. Wait, Gary! I actually sent the fake anthrax. Go, go, you're so good. Yeah, so, but this is the first, this summer, I'm doing like one show next week, then nothing in July, then maybe one show in August, two shows in August, and I'm like, oh, this is nice.

But for four years straight, I was like, man, I got to catch up to everybody else in terms of just not money, but just reps. Yeah, because you feel like you grow so much on the road, especially early. Well, you're in a race with yourself. That's what I figured out. It's like you're not you're not ever in a race with anybody else. I used to look at guys who were headlining and be like, oh, like when I was just doing club spots and be like, dude, I don't know if I could ever get that funny.

And then when I started headlining, I was like, oh, it's not that I can't get that funny. I didn't have the reps. And then when I started to feel that growth, I was like, stay on it. You're a different bag of chemicals in that person. You have different circumstances, different things. Absolutely.

But the idea that that level of funny was unattainable, unattainable was like, I was like, oh, that's not it. I just needed the reps. And now then when I started getting them, I was like, I want like, oh, that's not it. I just needed the reps and now, then when I started getting them, I was like, I want no more. 10,000 hours. Now you're cooking. That's another thing.

I think once you catch, once that heat happens, you're just selling out everywhere right now, so it's very hard to stop doing that when you've been working so many years. This is what I worked for. I remember when you first caught heat and it was like, I remember you were doing those shows at Times Square Art Center, and it was just,

this is like, this is way throwback, so any people in New York that really remember this era. 2011? 2011. That was one of the biggest inspirations for me, to be honest, I was like, oh shit, you can do something on the internet, people will appreciate it, and they'll pour into the shows and everything that you're doing,

because before that, the only salvation was TV. Yeah, you know. Pretty much. Right? But I remember telling you, I was like, dude, this is amazing. I remember I would call you when I heard someone on the street doing it. I'd be like, you know, this is fucking insane. Like I just saw this thing happening.

I was like, oh, there's, it is possible to do this a different way. You know? Now it's the only way. The only way. Yeah. And it's like, so anyway, when you catch that heat, I do think it's important to like put your foot on the gas. Like I do, like run after it, run after it, run after it.

But after you get, you know, a nice little runway where you've been succeeding, I also think it's important to like pull back and relax. That's just me personally. Like I know there's guys that are on the road relentlessly. I don't like doing that because I feel like the jokes, they become like versions of the same shit that I've been telling. And if I take a step back and I wait for a few months and I don't even touch the stage

and I start getting really excited to go back on, all of a sudden it's a different perspective. And then the audience, when they see the jokes, they're like, oh, I didn't see this side of you. It's like, I didn't know that there was that side of me. I had to like be a human being for a little bit. You start to treat it like a band on tour, take a little time off.

Yeah. And then people get excited for the new... And then put a new album out that's different than something you've ever done. And they get excited for it. They don't see you all the time. The Beastie Boys used to do that. They would put out a smash album and then tour, and then they'd go away for three years. Because in their minds, three years, right at the cusp of about three years, they were

like, people are starting to be like, what about the Beastie Boys? And then boom, they're back. And then, yeah, I think even, I don't know how long the Beatles or whatever would take time off, but like, at least the albums feel a little different. You know, say whatever you want about the Beatles, but like at least the music feels.

They're amazing. Okay. So it's like the music feels a little different, and then your fans, when they come out, they're having this new experience that they haven't had before, and hopefully it's good and they like it, but now every time they come back, they're like, oh, that they haven't had before and hopefully it's good and they like it. But now every time they come back they're like, oh this shit is gonna be different. This shit is gonna be new.

Yeah. And yeah, I think that's how you just... You gotta remember it's an art. That's the thing. It's so... because it's a business, you gotta remember that it's an art because... And you got a lot of people pushing you in different ways. You got, you know, shout out to agents and everybody. Like I understand that that's how they make money and all that kind of stuff, but... Of? It's hard to not... not even that, but it is hard when they come with offers for certain things.

You have a family and you've got a fucking mortgage, you're like, oh, we got to do that. So it's hard to push that off. But I do think for the art. You have to remember it's an art or else you keep chasing the money, then you're going to end up hurting yourself. The money always comes second. Yeah, you got to, you're going to end up hurting yourself. Happy Juneteenth, by the's the way to look at it. You're gonna end up hurting yourself. Happy Juneteenth, by the way.

Yeah, that's why you guys are here. You decided he was gonna be on it, not him. Yeah, that's why we're late. Let's get some four guys, let's get fucking four white guys in an Indian for fucking Juneteenth. This is the respect, this is the fucking lack of respect. Juneteenth is three days from now. Pride month, they get a whole fucking month.

It's not Juneteenth. It's on a couple days. Of course you don't know, one of your best friends is black. White ass would be early on Juneteenth. I'm early. Yeah, we should have been late to celebrate Juneteenth. And that's not a black joke. That's a Juneteenth joke specifically because that holiday is late. It took so long for it to do right. Absolutely. Disguised fuck face. Yeah. You know, it's like Juneteenth, they plop it right in the face. I like you dude. You're a good person.

A whole month. He doesn't believe they just fell for it. You know, I do, I really do like you. You look like a woman in Portland. You do look like a kid who will sniff a woman's seat after she leaves the room. You look like a guy that has no kings tattooed around your belly button. Wait, I actually don't even know what the no kings protest is. Saying that Donny T. is a king, wants to be a king, and we got King 776 and they're protesting

against him. And Walmart paid for it. That's what it is. What would be the argument about the organization of these protests? Because it seems like awfully organized. Well, it was just the money came from or a big chunk of money came from one of the heirs of the Walmart. Was it Kathy Hilton? Yeah, but that means Ben Hatton Trump, right? And she got money. But the argument would then be like the person who benefits the most from not having tariffs and

illegal labor is the person that is supporting this no-kings protest. But then other people are saying that she's separate from the family and that the company itself has disavowed her political affiliation, yada yada yada. But as long as everybody's being law-abiding, I love it. I think it's cool, go protest. The thing that's so dumb is when you see, when everybody has a Mexican flag or they have a Hamas flag or some shit,

it's like you guys are subverting your own protests. You're just giving ammunition to your opposition. Like why would you do it? This is what the FBI used to do. The FBI used to put in fake people, what is it, COINTELPROs, what it was called. They used to put in fake people to cause violence and fuck shit up so that they could subvert the protests.

And now people do it on their own. Right, right. Like to tune the FBI's work for it. Right, right. Right, like. Good point, yeah. So to tune the FBI's work for them. Right, right. Right? Good point, yeah. So you would think somebody was saying it to us. I forgot who it was. Maybe it was Cenk.

You know Cenk? Yeah, yeah. Young Turks. Yeah, Cenk. Yeah, the Young Turks. So he was saying something like back in the day, like during the Martin Luther King protests, if there was somebody that was acting out

or doing something violent, they would circle that person and then hand them over to the police. Because they're like, you are going to subvert this very important messaging. And right now it feels like there is, it's not exactly happening. It's going to be very easy to shut down.

And when you say subvert, you mean make moderate people be like, oh, they're, they're bad. Exactly. Like, oh, this is what it stands for. When in reality, I'm sure the majority of people that are out during these protests are not being violent. They're not doing anything stupid. Well, the difference with this in 1964 is that they had a message. They had a whole thing.

Like we wanna change the segregation on the bus lines of Birmingham. Whereas like with this, I don't know what the goal is. Right, it's just they're throwing a temper tantrum against Trump. They don't have like an objective. Well some people say the objective is like have a little more empathy for the people

who are here illegally, they have families. Yeah, it's just harder to make it like a systematic thing when there's no actual law. Like segregation was a law I can go against. That's not quite here. It's a little blurry. So it comes across, I'm sure anybody who's against it as, oh, they're fighting for more illegal immigration.

Which probably not. They're probably like, yo, these people have been working here for like 10, 20 years. They got a family and you're sending the dad back to Mexico. Like that's a little fucked up. But then people, it is, but then people- And Donnie flipped on it. Donnie flipped on it, but people will say then, and what I mean people, I mean my group chat will say that Obama got rid of more illegal immigrants than Trump. They just didn't publicize it. The media wants this. So the

media- But whose fault is that? But he's saying the media is cherry picking again and making this a bigger or, or you could say that the administration ran on it. So they gave them the opportunity to publicize it. Maybe. Naturally, of course, anything Trump does, they're going to be people who are like, this is the worst thing ever and let's organize against it. Of course. But if you run on it specifically and you go, we're going to do this.

And Tom Homan is on every single news outlet. Like we're coming for you. It's very easy to push back against it when like Obama and Biden did it behind closed doors and didn't really look anyway and sent way more back and probably tore apart way more families and did way more fucked up shit actually but they don't shine a light on it so and they have maybe protection in the media so it's harder to organize against.

But also Obama wasn't making promo videos of guys with chains sending them to Al-Zamino. So he's kind of promoting it. That's what I'm saying also. You kind of should be grateful that Trump is so brazen. Also Obama wasn't making promo videos of guys with chains sending them to Be grateful that Trump is so brazen Wait, we say that's like they should be grateful that Trump is so out there because then it like brings attention to it Yes, if everyone else is doing it so covertly then they're actually Deporting more people is good for the liberals exactly. Yes He's making America great again He's making it easier. He's making America greater again.

He's bringing the liberals in. He's helping everyone. He's in office and then he's helping Democrats. But it is interesting, like, I think, and I think this is something maybe Democrats do know, maybe they don't know, but like, he really responds to public sentiment, like, almost immediately. Like, if he feels his base doesn't like some shit he backs off of it immediately So maybe the way to get him to do the things you want is just to convince his base Then they're not interested in it instead of just going bad guy Hitler. He's fucked about like that doesn't work

He don't care like he's not the type person if you tell him to do something will work, but if his base turns He's switching it right remember like remember. He was like yeah, we're gonna turn Gaza into Mar-a-Lago or whatever, and his base was like, the fuck we are, and he's like, I was joking about that shit. I don't even wanna Mar-a-Lago out here. He'll turn. Yeah. So why isn't that the strategy? Well, how would you implement that strategy?

I think they did it with the no-kings protests. They said, hey, we don't want this, and immediately he's like, you know what, we're actually not gonna send people back who are farming, we need our farmers, and we're not gonna send our hotel workers, we need these people this. And immediately he's like, you know what? We're actually not gonna send people back who are farming. We need our farmers and we're not gonna send our hotel workers. We need these people. They're servicing the community.

So there is a version of it where it works. So just make sure that his base understands it. That's why I'm curious about the Israel-Iran stuff is because his base does not want intervention. I think he also realized that you actually do need those people and you can't send them back because Americans don't wanna do those jobs. The farmers just don't function without illegal labor.

Some things just don't function without illegal labor. I don't subscribe to that. I mean, there was one was in Alabama where they did it and then they actually, they enacted state law. You heard about that? No, tell me. Yeah, this is like a case study for it. So they, a state law where they got rid

of all of the illegal migrants and like the economy just plummeted And so they reversed it because the farmers were like, you know, we can't nobody wants to do this Nobody can do it and then he'll respond to the economy, right? So the economy in Alabama shit and you have all these senators and congressmen going to yell this we can't sustain this We need to do something he'll move on that so I think the way is to just show the the sentiment. The reason I kept asking about AIs is because the next election is probably JD versus who knows AOC or Buddha judge or something like that.

He likes it in the Buddha church. This is the AI presidency, right? And JD is from this part of Ohio, like Appalachia, right? Which is like, was ravaged by outsourcing and technological advancement. Like it destroyed. I think there's this rule called like the Appalachia Student Grant, where if you have a 3.0 GPA, you get into any school in Ohio for free. So they treat them like Native Americans, the white people. Louisiana has a similar thing. Okay. Just fucking idiots all over those places. So he's this guy, right? And it's like, how is he gonna grapple with this idea

that AI is going to do to the country, most likely, what happened to the place that he is from? Right. And you're funded by tech. And Big Tech wants it more than anything, and they've been investing in him for fucking two decades So how is he gonna handle and I do think he has empathy for these things like obviously grew up in that community And I think that like say whatever you know the internet will say all these different things

But I think that he has empathy for for people and I think that's why he's a good communicator But like that is a big thing to fucking grapple with are you gonna be supportive of this transition? and grapple with. Are you going to be supportive of this transition when it could ravage the country in the same way that the community you came from has been ravaged? And how are you going to handle that? Right. Like that's, that's murky. What do you do? Do you say to the tech guys, do you say, Hey, fuck you, this is going to kill the country. Do you invest in like transitioning the workforce to? I think you just gracefully lose an election. I don't want that responsibility. I don't want that to be on me. I think you just gracefully lose an election I don't want that responsibility. I don't want that to be on and you try but I think it's gonna swing back left after this Really? I really do because Trump is not really delivering on the promises

Yeah, and the wars are still going on his big beautiful bill is raising the debt by trade and all that he's spending He did a military parade. That was a fucking joke for 40 something million. He's spending he did a military parade that was a fucking joke for 40 something million He's spending and you know, we have a spending problem and that's what he ran on We're gonna cut all this stuff and it seems like he backed off a doge Yeah He's just making his deals when he went to Vietnam his son opened the golf course while they were having a tariff war with Vietnam They're like now we got a billion dollar guard kids getting rich. He's got his fucking meme coin. He's being dotty Yeah, make your money and already there's just too much chaos and shit going on The kids getting rich, he's got his fucking meme coin. He's being dotty. Yeah. Making money.

And already there's just too much chaos and shit going on. It's like this was the same thing that happened the last time he ran for a second term where it was people go, it's too hot right now. The temperature is too hot. I don't like it. Let's calm down. And then they put Biden and nobody really was supportive of Biden back then, but they wanted to not be this temperature.

Yeah, dude, Donald Trump has not won an election. OK, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. She kills everybody. Hillary. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. And then you don't even have a primary. A primary the second time. Okay. She was the first one ousted in the primary. She was on the mic. I agree with that, Sen. But I guess what I would say is like, he had to win the primary against the Republicans. And he did that against all odds. So I wouldn't take credit. Nobody wanted him on the Republican side. He took over the party. Simply general election.

I get what you're saying. General election. Yeah. Dude, I mean. No, I hear what you're saying. The Democrats have just been going, this is what our thing is gonna do. We're gonna tell, we're gonna support this culture

that's saying on top of all these white people who are struggling, their jobs are gone, it's also bad that you're white. That's gonna be our strategy. That's not gonna happen. And then on top of that, we're gonna bypass black people and go, the gay people are the most discriminated against group and we're just gonna focus

on all these policies to protect them. It just wasn't a good idea. It's just as simple as that. Do you think that they're able to transition? Can they look themselves in the mirror and take accountability for their messaging? AOC can and I will vote for her just come and look at her tits. I want to look at her. I want to look at her for four years.

She does have absolute bombs. She's a fucking smoke show. She's four room, a fucking slurper poop. Yeah, she's a hottie with a body. And it's just time for a strong 19 on Israel. Yeah, 100%, dude. 100%. If I was there January 6th, which I was not,

I would run right into the office and sniff her seat. Sniff her seat. He would get there first, but we'd get there second and third. Yeah, that's just what, oh yeah, he would definitely, the sky's face would be there. Yeah, there's four parties now, dude.

There's four parties. You got Maggie, you got the old school Republicans, you got the Democrats, and you got the Progressives. And I think we went extreme right, and I think the Progressives are gonna come in. I think this will become a little bit more Europe-like. We'll get universal healthcare, we'll get some of the things,

the military budget will be cut, things will happen. I think Progressives can win if they don't make it about identity politics. If they stay away from identity politics. Bernie was on the pod here, and there's a moment where he just goes, yeah, there's a lot of people and they're like, oh, I'm gay, I'm the best, I'm black, I'm amazing.

He goes, who gives a fuck? Like, what do you stand for? And that was the first time I saw somebody on the left in politics kind of acknowledge what everybody feels, which is, hey, why are we making that the zenith? Why is that the most important? If you're going to have a thing, it should be rich versus poor.

That's what would help. That's going to win Bensonhurst. Rich versus poor will win Bensonhurst. Yeah, and I think Kanye broke that. So now people should see that just being black or, you know, it's like, he's a Nazi. It's like, what's the more relevant thing, him being black or him being? Don't get me wrong. it is impressive, he's the Jackie Robinson of Nazis.

I mean, dude, in some weird way, that was Martin Luther King's dream. To be that type of a quality? I mean, serious, you have to respect. I mean, and that shows that we are certainly free. That's so funny. When a black boy could grow up in Chicago to become the most famous racist on the planet, we are now equal.

You thought the 1940s Nazi's uniforms were nice? Wait until Kanye. Fashionista. Yeah. That's interesting. Absolutely. Maybe he broke that. He did break it.

Maybe he broke that mold. But when like, oh, what you look like isn't the most important thing. It. Maybe he broke that. He did break it. Maybe he broke that mold, going like, oh, what you look like isn't the most important thing, it's what you stand for. And you can see even like the, but you can even see like, progressives moving away from that idea. Simply like, I would see like, write ups about our pod.

Like, we're the only pod with any diversity, right? Realistically, we are, right? And I just see three. Oh yeah, we have some black guys sometimes. Yeah, and he sits on the sidelines on Juneteenth. But I wish I could see this kid's face and tell you what he is. We're honoring him.

He's on a pedestal, you know? No, no, I meant the disguised face. I wasn't, you thought it was a black child? I was making a disguised face. Yeah, you got to see that, right. He's got a, yeah. But anyway, in terms of like how we were positioned for a while, like none of that mattered.

And all of a sudden sudden diversity didn't matter. It was just like ideas. What do you think? Yeah, yeah, it's interesting. All right guys, let's take a break for a second. I need to tell you guys about Black Rifle Coffee. I need to be very serious. You know, I've been quite cartoonish in some of my past ad reads, but right now I'm gonna be I'm gonna be 100% serious with you about the importance of this brand, okay? World War III is upon us. We have to make a choice. We have to draw a line in the sand.

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know, at the end of the day, our base thing as human beings, I mean, we've talked about this, there was how many different versions of, there was like Homo sapien, Homo, there was a bunch of different Homo's. Types of people. And then we, as the Homo sapiens, we won this thing. How did we win? Because we were the most ruthless

and the most, we were the ones built, our humanoid was the ones built designed for war, the savage. Why was that? Like what happened to Neanderthals? What happened to the other versions? We were just more savage than them. Homo sapiens from any part of the world.

So I think our baseline state of being is war. And then when you aren't physically fighting in a war, you'll find it another way. I'll find a problem with a podcast that is very diverse. I'll find a problem with that. The negativity bias. I'll find a problem with a religion. I'll find a problem at home.

Because that's our baseline is that's who we are. That's why you're here. We have to overcome the negativity bias which is in us from evolution. It's just horrible. And that's religion, right? And that is Jesus coming through going, hey, I love you. Where I forgive you for the shit that you're gonna do that's fucked up because you have your negativity bias.

I'm here to fill you up with love so you don't do that stuff. And when you do fuck up, I forgive you again. And wow, you could see how profound that is. Sure. I wonder if it took down the temperature throughout the world when it took over. So you don't do that stuff and when you do fuck up, I forgive you again Right and wow, you could see how like profound that is Well, I wonder if it took down the temperature throughout the world when it took over or some people with same Religions killed more people than anybody because then you know fighting about different people would say there's the argument That's because those other words fucked it up Say Jesus nobody's killed more people than the idea of you don't got time for it though. It's an emergency, dude

We're close to the fucking World War II. We need to put everyone on a low dose. On a low dose of Lexapro. Just fucking get the Lexapro, put it in the water supply and fucking calm everyone down. Are you on the Lex? I'm on a low dose. Yeah, why do you think we restarted the podcast? Wait a minute, tell me, tell me, tell me.

And that is on medicine. I have, can I? Five milligrams Lexapro. I mean, most people say it doesn't do anything, but the placebo effect is real. I can tell you it does a lot. Hold on. Okay, so this is something that I've seen a lot of my friends that I grew up with that are kind of like 40s parents, like a staggering percentage of them are on a low dose of Lexapro.

And nobody's having a conversation about this, but they're all kind of happy, especially the ones that are not living the life that they thought they would live. They are much more accepting of this life. Is that what it does? Well, I have a complicated situation. When I had kids, something happened.

Like I started realizing so much about who I was and my life and where I come from and my parents' trauma. That was big. And I've had trauma, I've had violent things happen to me. And so you have kids and then you love them so much. You don't want them to go through that. But you also start comparing it to your childhood and your life.

And so a lot of traumatic, I started having like, you know, anxiety and panic and went on a journey and, you know, did EMDR therapy, which is- What's that? Right. EMDR therapy, it's the, it's sort of the, you know, it's the gold standard for trauma therapy. I did trauma therapy. And what they do is, it was created by this chick Shapiro in the 80s.

And it's bilateral stimulation. So the whole goal of it is to simulate REM, because when your mind is in REM, you access your subconscious, and you reprocess the memories from a safe place as an adult to sort of reprocess those emotions. I mean, the whole, we're going through another, like we had the pharmacological revolution in mental health

and now we're sort of, we know now that pills are not the long-term cure that they were, so now we're going into this trauma in the body and it seems to be all the science, because we've been able to mix neuroscience with all these schools of psychiatry that have been around and pills and everything and figure out a lot and learn a lot,

because they can see parts of the brain, they can see that trauma is not stored the way it's supposed to be stored in your brain. Some of it they think is in your gut, some of it is inherited through your mom. Your mom went through something horrible, you inherited that, a remnant of it. I'm on a low Your mom went through something horrible. You inherited that. A remnant of it.

I'm on a low dose of Lexapro, too. No way. I talked to, so I have a doctor, Omar Durrani. Fucking low dose, baby! Low dose from the... I would just talk to him about why I can't sleep, whatever. And then he would, for like a year, he'd be like, hey, you might have some level of anxiety.

I would kind of brush it off. And then I talked to another psychiatrist who specializes in sleep. And I just told him about life whatever ago It's a few months ago and he was like I think he's been selling out shows ever since Yeah, he said works to fucking case that people who grew up in that kind of situation often have anxiety Sounds like you have anxiety and then I've been seeing a therapist for like 10 years and I was like, yeah I guess I maybe I have like some low like level of anxiety, I can just function with it.

And she literally goes, yeah. Like it was the most obvious thing in the world that I've heard for years. And my wife had been saying it too, because my wife has like general anxiety disorder, whatever OCD, she has these things diagnosed. And she would look at me and be like, I think you have anxiety,

you just can function really well with it. So you don't ever think about it. And have you noticed changes in the last couple? I do think so. And I noticed when I used to get mad, especially within the relationship, the temper would be like, I'm screaming, I'm going nuts, I'm whatever, and now that has pretty much died out.

So I do notice that, that's one thing I have. I thought back, I was like, oh, since I started and my body's adjusted to it, whatever. We're also too, I think like, I'm sleeping a little better. Through evolution, anxiety might not be a thing, I don't know, 50,000 years from now, because we have it because we were just another animal

on the plane. We were just another animal at some point that would just get eaten by a lion. So we needed a level of anxiety for survival. We don't need it anymore. We don't have a social utility for this anxiety that's baked in us. So it's like searching for things that justify itself.

Wow, that's really interesting. It's why in war-torn countries, they don't have the problems we have, because they just have one major problem, and that's staying alive and being killed and gassed by whatever enemy wants to gas them. They don't have generalized anxiety disorder. Yeah, their anxiety's useful.

They're not worried about, they're not even fighting with their spouses half the time, because they're like, we have to survive, so we have, our anxiety is useful. They're not worried about they're not even fighting with their spouses half the time because they're like we have to survive So we have this our anxiety is actually being used for the for the human Basically saying that their life is is not that dissimilar to the anxiety that a human 20,000 years ago would go through. So their anxiety is being used for what it was designed to be used for So therefore it doesn't trickle into bullshit. That's interesting. But what we know about the nervous system now, and we know it, is that your nervous system

is the most archaic part of your brain. And the communication between the neocortex and the nervous system is not great. So your nervous system will respond before your reasoning gets a chance. And so anything that reminds that person of that trauma it reacts and your brain it actually shuts your reasoning down and for good reason because you don't want to reason when a lion is philosophizing when you're

about to get eaten so that's what trauma is and so I was brought up by two traumatized people I didn't really know it was normal for me. War-torn people. Yeah I mean my mother lived under a German occupation for four years but but something bad happened to her. She told me every day a Nazi soldier would come to her house. The way I look at it now, the way the therapist explained to me, probably that's the way she remembered it, by disassociating. That's what that was a big part of occupation. And my dad was a war veteran. So my dad actually had PTSD. He actually, when he came back from Korea, he spent like a month in a hospital. He actually, when he came back from Korea, he spent like a month in a hospital.

He had the rash. They called it shell shock back then. I was on the corner with my dad once and a tire exploded. My dad fucking crawled under a car. And- He didn't have to yell the N-word though. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. That part was unnecessary. Yeah, that was necessary. But the look in his face- I figured it was a kid. I remember it. Looking at someone who's there, it wasn't necessary. But the look in his face was a kid looking at someone who's there, but they're not there was the,

now as an adult, I realize what it is. And then my panic attacks didn't start, I didn't have any until I got shot and I didn't know what it was. So after you got shot, you got shot in your 20s, right? I got shot in my 20s. And this is when you were doing the nightclub thing.

That's right, I first started doing comedy, yeah. And then, so you get shot, your 20s, right? I got shot in my 20s. And this is when you were like doing the nightclub thing. That's right, I first started doing comedy, yeah. And then, so you get shot, panic attacks happen, do you associate them to that or are you just like? No, I had no idea what was going on. The internet was just starting right, so I had no idea. You can't even look up this information. Yeah, I didn't even know what was going on.

It was just like, what, I'd get on the train and I'd start bugging out and sweating and I'd be like, what is going on? Then of course you go, something's wrong with my health. So then you start worrying about something's wrong with your health. And then I went to a therapist and I worked through it and it went away, but it didn't totally go away.

This is the EMDR? No, no, no, this was back then. Now the- Tell me about the EMDR. EMDR, so it's fascinating and all the science, they use it now in all the VAs. It's the most effective form of treatment for people with PTSD.

Can you tell me what exactly they do? So what they do is they bilateral stimulation. So they get your eyes to move back and forth. You can do that with a ball, you can do that with fingers. The ball doesn't have to go very far with you. With me they just do it like that. Even the old me is just like this. They actually don't even have to move it.

And then they take you back through the memory. A palindrome. That was a good one. Yeah. Keep going. And so, and then they take you back through the memory and you sort of feel yourself experience the memory very vividly because you're tricky, you're hacking your brain. It's like a hypnosis kind of thing. It's not hypnosis because you're fully aware and fully conscious.

So it's just hacking your brain by tricking it into thinking you're in a REM sleep, like bilateral stimulation. So it's all about bilateral stimulation. You could do it, you know, tapping, you can do it with fingers. If you're doing something to activate your active mind and so your subconscious mind kind of comes out.

Like when you're driving, you come up with good ideas. I was gonna say, maybe sometimes in a long run. Yes, because it's actually bilateral. Okay. So it's actually true. I felt versions of this. On a long run, yeah, you can get into this almost meditative state,

and you can access these feelings in a way that you can't when I'm just sitting down trying to where my brain is turning me in different ways. Okay, so you access these things, and then when you're accessing them, the therapist is like helping you deal with them or is it simply just acknowledging that things start to come up, you start to remember things, right? You start to remember it and then you the whole goal is to reprocess the memory as an adult.

The ultimate goal is to look back and sort of help yourself, be the parent if you were neglected, yeah, you know, give the hug and so then you kind of re-remember it that way in a sort of way yourself. Be the parent if you were neglected, give the hug. And so then you kind of re-remember it that way in a sort of way. It's very interesting how the brain works, but you process it and you process those stuck emotions. The emotions are stuck. So it is kind of cool that we do have the ability

to move past these traumas, but we have to access them in a way where we are, I don't wanna say vulnerable enough, but like, vulnerable enough to actually acknowledge what has happened. What I've learned from doing this, man, is that most people don't know why they are, why they are, who they are, what they, it's all childhood, Freud was right about one thing,

it's all from the childhood when your brain is developing. We know that too. The first five years are the most important. The brain develops till it's 25. So for an example, I just get like some guy feels like he wants to get out of his marriage or something. He's like, something's wrong with my wife, really. And he feels trapped just when he's home.

He has no idea that the reason he feels trapped is because when he was home, he was trapped with two parents who were fighting, throwing shit. He has no clue that the reason he feel trapped is because when he was home he was trapped with two parents who were fighting, throwing shit. He has no clue that he feels that thing because of his childhood, so he just projects it onto his. To that person who's completely innocent. And I think. You can go to chrisdcomedy.com and see that guy do stand ups.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. While I was giving the example I was going like, let's talk about Chris right now. I love you, babe. You know I'm just kidding. You said I could do those things now. I was giving the example, I was going like, let's talk about Chris right now. I love you, babe, you know I'm just kidding.

You said I could do those things now. I was just joking around, because you know that I love you. I truly think the future of humanity depends on us decoding us on an individual. Like somehow we, because we're the complex species, we're the one that's creating all this problem. We're the ones who need to get control of our brain and figure out who we are, why we are, and it's usually because of childhood trauma.

Child things that happen in your childhood that make you the way that you are, and we project it out into the world unconsciously because we haven't explored. And the pharmacological approach was a brilliant. But a band-aid. But it's a brilliant innovation, but it is a band-aid. Band-aid.

But sometimes in order for society to function, for a lot of us, we needed a little bit of a band-aid. But now we're accessing it, or at least understanding it, on a different wavelength. Wow, that's awesome. And have the VA's seen massive improvements from? 100%. Really?

This is real science. It's crazy, it's just, you know, you hear about it and you go like, it's real science. You can go research it yourself. It's like I said. And you felt like transformation in your life? I felt transformation, but it's not just the EMDR alone. Like you have to prep for the EMDR,

and then when you do the EMDR, your pathways get opened up so they know, they can correspond with the neuroimaging what's happening. We have neuroplasticity. When you're young, your neuroplasticity is very elastic and you can change very quick. That's why you can learn a language real quick. And when you're old.

It's tougher, but it's still possible. So there's more resistance, it's harder to change, but you're actually through EMDR building new pathways. And so that's why it's- I mean, that's cool to know that you can still change, like that you're not locked into this childhood that was not your fault at all. You just have to be willing to explore it.

Let me tell you something, it's fucking- Painful or what? It is painful. It is painful. How long a period is this? Sorry to interrupt. No, yeah, can you talk about what you revisited, like if you're willing to, like this is what happened, this is what the therapist or whatever asked me

and made me revisit. Yeah, I was brought up with a brain injured brother, so that's where it started, right? My parents just left me with a- Not the gay one. Not the gay one. That's the difference. She's, yeah.

I was brought up with a brain injured brother, and you know, my mom was a human rights lawyer, so she was out fucking trying to take care of the children, which was another thing that I know, oh, I know why you're doing that now. Now I know thing that I know, oh, I know why you're doing that now. Now I know why you're doing that. Now I know why you're doing that. Now I know why you're international rights kids

and that's what's her thing. I'm like, I get it. It's sad, even when I'm saying it, it's real fucked up. But I was left with a brain injury brother. My parent, my father was working all the time. And so I was left with him and it was confusing. It was, as my therapist put it, developmentally inappropriate.

So I was left with something I was scared of but I was responsible for him. And it was just the two of us. So my nervous system just developed in this hyper state. And then I got shot, which fucking reinforced it. And you know- And is that why you think, did the therapist say that's why he thinks you would put on your mother's

fishnet stockings? Because you want it to be your mother? Because that's a real thing. No, actually, yeah. That is true. Actually you thought it was a perverted thing, but you were actually being a mom to a brain-injured mother and you're throwing the nets.

That's why we call them Yanny nets. Can you throw them fish nets? Swap around. Yeah, it's a completely normal thing. I made it into, yeah, I made Joe, it was one of my first shows. We all do shit, I used to throw my mother's high heels. Yeah, so, you know, we all have things.

This is the best way to have this combo. Yeah, it's called being from New York. So I would get so panicked when I was a kid and I didn't remember, I would go try to smell my mother's clothes, which is what all mammals do. And now I look back. It's a comfort, right?

It's a comfort, because I was just at home alone and with my brother and so I would smell her clothes and then I would smell her stockings and next thing you know I was throwing them on. Next thing you know, Morisa was created. That's sad. You've seen the, there's some experiment where they have, I think it's a monkey

and they have a monkey that's a caricature of a monkey. It's actually not real and they put it in some furry outfit and then they have one that's a caricature of a monkey. It's actually not real. And they put it in some furry outfit, and then they have one that's just made out of metal. And the monkey will always gravitate towards the more comfortable, softer version because you are seeking the comfort of your mom. The metal one has food. Oh yeah, yeah, it wouldn't even go to the food one

that's metal because it doesn't want food. It wants the nurturing and comfort from the mom. Oh my god. They did this, I think it's Romania, they did this where the babies were unattended, if you look up the study or some. So it's a very important study where the babies weren't comforted

or didn't get, they were orphans or something, and then a lot of them just died because they didn't get care. Like we actually, humans need care. We're vulnerable, like for the first five years, like it's not like children. That's what's beyond that, community is so important. Like I have someone that deals with a lot of like psychological issues and like when he is at his best,

it's when he's socializing. So like friend group, take him away from his friend group for a few weeks and he'll really struggle. Like, and I mean like severely so have him with his friends just hanging out and all of a sudden these like Psychosomatic behaviors that start start to like just kind of like I want to say evaporate subside a bit but they subside a bit like the temperature just kind of comes down and I guess that is the big concern you always hear people talking about where it's like if we're all online

There is like a cold callousness should be online like it is like the it's the band-aid, right? It's like you think you have community, but you don't have the nurture. You don't have the high-five You don't have the hug you don't have like your friends celebrating you when you hit a game-way shot in some fucking beer league, right and Wow, man, I didn't wow Bad for your mental yeah, Pardon? Online is just bad. But especially the isolation. Yeah, the isolation of it, but also just our brains are not evolved to,

our brains can't tell the difference between real and fake, like we just, our nervous system can't. When you're having an anxiety attack, even though you know it's not real, your body is reacting as if it's a real thing. But that's why those centarians, though, every place you go to that has a majority, that has a high percentage of 100 year old people or more after diet of course the second

most thing even more than exercise is community the ones who live amongst a community and talk to someone on a regular basis live so much longer than the ones who don't. That's why people die in nursing homes. 100% you're taking them you're isolating them. We're a social species that's how we survive. That's why we have the negativity bias when someone says something negative about you you're isolating them. We're a social species, that's how we survive. That's why we have the negativity bias when someone says something negative about you, you focus on that and not the 100 compliments because you wanna make sure you're in the tribe,

you're still, it's just all built into us. Yeah, they said we had Peter Atiyah, do you guys know who Peter is? Sure, Dr. Peter Atiyah, I love him. But he said, it shot out zone two heart rate, facts. But he said an interesting thing where, he said the community is like one of the most important things 100% but he also said he goes we shouldn't be looking

at centenarians they're called. Centenarians. We shouldn't be looking at centenarians for health advice because they are the LeBron James of people. So you go to all these centenarians they're like yeah I smoke a cigarette every single day I go tonight with some whiskey. He's like yeah yeah they're living long in spite of that. They're the outliers. Not because of that. So we have to be very careful to copy their behaviors, but in terms of community, massive. And I think that's why they say, like, guys who are in a golf league or a tennis league,

like all these pickleball, whatever you wanna say, they're living much longer. It's not pickleball. It's the fact that every day you're hanging out with four other people, talking shit. Yeah. And wow. Here's a big aspect that I experienced personally because one of the Blue Zones is Ikaria, which

is the Icarians. Yeah. And so they have- Is that in Greece? It's Greece. It's a Greek island. It's one of the Blue Zones. And so they hired me, right?

So they have an Icarian convention every year in different cities. So they hired me to do their show. They come to a hotel, they have festivals. I experienced it firsthand, right? So the show was like at 10 p.m. or nine or whatever, it was done at like 11, then they took me to this ballroom, it was like midnight, it was empty, and I was like in my mind,

I'm like, oh, the party's over here, right? It's done. And they're like, no, we haven't begun. And I was like, what? It's midnight. And they're like, no, this is when we start. So, and then I see 90, I swear to God, old people, 90 year olds, 80 year olds, four year olds,

30 year olds, 40 year olds, they all pack in, drank like fishes, partied like you can't believe, traditional music, everyone's dancing, going party. And you know, they have a joke, this is why they live long is because they party so hard. And in the Blue Zones, That's one of the things too is they party hard, but it's Intergenerational you have the kids and the adults and everybody's everyone parties together. It's like a bird-cricer cruise Except the weights a little different

Heavier on that cruise. Yeah, I Yeah, sometimes I don't know how that boat just fucking stays afloat. Yeah. Are you saying, oh, bloody. I did a Bert Kreischer cruise and I did the Joker's cruise between the two of them, dude. I mean, there was a lot of traffic just to get on the line for food

and it was just because people in scooters were holding up the line for food. Yeah, it was actual human traffic in cars. Yeah, if we ever run out of bombs in this country, I'm gonna start just dropping cruise ship passengers out of cars. Yeah, if we ever run out of bombs in this country, I'm gonna start just dropping cruise ship passengers out of flames. Yeah. They're fucking heavy people.

So the intergenerational factor I think is important too. Yeah, you can't just, what do we do in America? It's like with our old- Throw them out. Yeah, throw them out. And why do we feel more comfortable doing that here and do they do that in like Britain?

Like where did we get this idea? because we surely didn't invent it. I think personally America is founded on looting we're all here to loot our parents and grandparents came here to loot so they are the people that left their families they left their families they're here for money everyone of us our ancestors left their families so they might not value maybe there's something%. So they might not value, maybe there's something even genetic, they might not value that community aspect as much as those other people. And there is an advantage to that because when you aren't as concerned with the group, you can innovate in ways that might piss off the group but might really be successful.

So that individual spirit is what drives the economy, it's what drives the identity of the country, but the cost of it is that connectivity. Yeah, it's what drives the identity of the country, but the cost of it also. Is that connectivity? Yeah, it's the connectivity. Also, I think we value who's got the most money. Oh yeah, thousand percent. Over wisdom, so everyone's like, Elon Musk is a god, and you're like,

this motherfucker has to meet his kids. Yeah, it's corny. He's super corny. Yeah, it's like, so corny. So we don't value that kind of older wisdom, we don't look at older people, we just look at, even when you come to America, and I noticed this when I toured in Scandinavia hard,

I noticed it right away. When you're in Scandinavia, if you say to somebody, what do you do? They look at you like you're rude. They're like, they don't even, when you meet someone, they don't do that thing, where they go like, what do you do? That doesn't factor into how they think of you as a person.

I'm telling you, they don't even bring it up. I know that for a fact, because we saw hot chicks working at McDonald's. I was there with Ricky Belize, and we walked to McDonald's. Ricky has a great bit about it. And there was a smoking hot chick that was like, and I think his joke is that she's like, can I get you something to drink?

He's like, can I get you something to drink? You couldn't believe that there was a dime working at McDonald's. And you would do that, obviously, if you're a kid, and you're trying to make a couple bucks and you weren't worried about societal scrutiny and what people might think of you. It's cultural, it's a cultural difference.

They have something there called the Yanti Loving, which is the law of Yanti, which nobody's bigger than the group. Don't get too big for your bridges, we're all kind of in it together. Now a lot of people say there's negatives to that, and I'm sure there is, because in America you can be who you want to be,

but I notice culturally they don't value that the way we do in America. What's the first thing you say? Yeah, what do you do? What do you do? And you define who that person is based on what they do. Yeah, and there is. It's the most important aspect.

It's important that you say that. There is a cost to that, there is a restrictive cost to a lack of an individual spirit. Like if you come from, my mom's from a work and class, comes from nothing, The idea that you could like excel is almost like insulting to your community. Right. Like who do you think you are is the conversation. Well, you think you're better than us. And that is like the restrictive pressure that comes with the community. The benefit is, you know what, maybe none of us are

going to make it out, but we all got each other. Right. But the cost is nobody's making it out. So it's like, how do you balance that? That's the tricky thing. Yeah, it's a very tricky thing, you're right. But that seems to be the way the simulator set this shit up. The simulator's having a good time. Everything's opposite, you know?

Oh, this tastes good, well, it's bad for you. It'll kill you. Yeah, you know? It's just set up. It's set up in opposition. Yeah. Yeah. And we do know that there's a God, I think, at this point. Yeah, of course. I think the there's a God, I think, at this point.

Yeah, of course. I think the more we learn about, you know, the universe and how it's coded. When did you come to that realization? I feel like you weren't a believer, really. Yeah, I was very skeptical. Let me tell you something. My dad died, this is when it started.

My dad- Fentanyl. Fentanyl, died of Fentanyl. Gets everybody. No, my dad died when he was 91. Fentanyl. And, you know, the thing he wanted the most, gets us all. What'd you say? Fentanyl.

Yeah, yeah. 91. So he died and the thing he wanted so much was grandkids, right? I wasn't able, one brother's brain injured, the other one's gay, so I'm the only one. A lot of pressure. And it didn't happen, I didn't make it to the kids, to show him the kids, but a year after he died, my daughter was expected and born on his birthday. Oh wow.

Right, so that's a one in 365 chance. And a year after he died, I mean my daughter's, you know, it's crazy. And then, to put how crazy that is real quick, there's a two day window you can even knock up your wife every month. Yeah, but let me ask you this. Like think about how insane the numbers are.

I know, I know, it's crazy to me. It's not even like if you timed it, it would happen. Like you said, you go, okay, I'm gonna have sex with my other wife nine months before his birthday. So we went, no, no, her regular, or menstrual cycle might not even match up. That's all, wow. And then it went even further.

And then you're saying it's spiritual, you're not saying that your daughter is a man trapped inside a woman's body. I'm not saying, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes. I thought you were trying to quite that sad. That's why you are Marisa. No, but then with my wife, we got- But then with my wife, we got-

That is quite the possibility. Yes. It's possible. It could be your dad. When we went to the hospital, too, and this was personal, but it's unmistakable, and it just made me know that like, oh dude, I don't know anything. There's forces out there, there's things.

Humbling. It's humbling, right? We get there and we turn on the TV, and so what's on TV is a cooking channel. The person on the cooking channel is making coleslaw. They're showing making coleslaw which is the most throwaway food. I don't even know why they put it on the plate. But my dad loved coleslaw.

He grew up working in his dad's diner of course, my grandfather had a diner. He would go to the diner and he would order more coleslaw. Sometimes he would just eat coleslaw. How the fuck did he live to 91? I don't know only dude I know who loved coltslaw he loved coltslaw and coffee he would always drink a lot of coffee I got to know Yanni's dad at the end he was a fascinating guy he said you were so good looking you should play for the Dodgers yeah you're good looking you should play for the Dodgers my dad was hilarious he goes my dad would go you know, he's gay. He's gay. He's a three dollar bill. Yeah, his dad was right.

Yeah, tell me keep going keep going. Yeah, so so it was it was on the cold slaw and I just immediately i'm just going like I just felt chills everywhere on your dad's birthday And like on his on his birthday the cold slaw and I just don't look I don't know and i've learned a lot I meditate now and all that stuff. I think it's all the same shit. And we're talking about Iran, Zoroastrianism, I looked into that, it's all the same shit. It's about we are not our minds. And then when you separate and you meditate

and you realize you're not your mind, which is something you identified. It's a crazy experience. It's a feeling, and then you go like. It's liberating though. But then you're also going, then what am I? What is this? Yeah, what am I, yeah. And then you're like, then you feel a part of this great everything and like it's in everything and then so you're

It's either It's all the same shit, but it's spiritual. But you took it in, but you guys are taking it in the best possible way. Like there are some people when they come to that realization when they are humbled they go well Everything's nothing and therefore fuck it. I had a little bit of that. Well, no, but I think that nihilism kind of takes over some people and there's like a bitterness and an anger that comes from it.

The other version of it, which it seems you are right now, it's kind of a really beautiful thing. Like, hey, we're not our minds. We are interconnected. There might be a bigger force out there and it's kind of beautiful to assume. Make absolutely no mistake, Yanni is on the beam. And what on the beam means is he is present inside God's warmth and love at all times, he is on the beam.

If an airplane, the way that it can land the plane is it has a beam that is getting from air traffic control and if it stays on the beam, it's gonna land. If it goes off the beam, Air India. So what Yanni is on the beam, folks, he is present within God's warmth and love in a way that I've never seen in our friendship. The kid is on the beam big.

And on the beam. You feel like you're on the beam? I feel like I'm on the beam. And I do feel very similar to Yanni, even in those stories about the spirituality of having a child, how beautiful that was, because when my girl was pregnant with our first daughter, when we got our very first appointment on the sonogram,

I realized I had sex with the girl at the sonogram in high school. And that was just an image, I'm joking obviously, and she was a 90 year old woman, it was Yanni's dad. But I know, I do feel one thing, one thing that I've accepted. You know, you go through all this stuff, life's just getting older.

It's making a lot of mistakes, it's failing, it's hardships, it's all that. It's, I feel that, and Yanni and I have spoken about this, where for me now, still residual anxiety, there's still things to be nervous about, there's still things to be upset about, obviously. But for me, I always think about it this way. And this is, might sound like nih upset about, obviously, but for me, I always think about it this way,

and this is, might sound like nihilism, but it's not, is no matter what, no matter what, we have a one-way ticket to die. We are dying, nobody's getting out of this planet alive, so if you told me suffering and depression and anxiety was going to somehow get me off that train of death, I would do it, but since either way, I'm going that way, I might as well be happy and enjoy everything

because there is nothing that will save me. So I accept that, but it's a very positive thing for me. I think that, I think you've made some decisions in your life that are very admirable. You know, like you have, you take care of a kid that's not yours. My stepson, sure. And have embraced him, and it seems like

built a relationship with his father. Like, I think there are a lot of guys that are in your situation that might not yours. My stepson, sure. And have embraced him and it seems like built a relationship with his father. I think there are a lot of guys that are in your situation that might not do that. No, because. And I just wanna compliment you. I think that that's like a very, I think it's a courageous thing, it's the right thing to do.

The mature thing. And it's an incredibly mature thing. And a lot of people aren't confronted with a decision like that. Right. And a lot of people don't have the maturity when they are to even kind of like embrace that other guy that's in the picture and make sure that that kid

doesn't feel like he's not part of the family. So I think that there's a lot of love in you, my man. There's a lot of love in you. Because for me, it's I look at him, my stepson, as an extension of my daughters. I mean, that's who he is. And number one, before I had children, he was, I fell in love with the woman and that was her child the most sacred thing to her

So how could I you know, how could I not you know, how could I discard him? You know, like he is he's my child fuck with me after you're 18 though Two grown men I would say, hey guys, yeah. No, I love my kids like they're my own. All three, that's why we say I have three kids. How do you balance that? You are that person, you're his stepfather, you're friends with his father.

But you're also someone that I imagine he looks up to, you're someone that I imagine, you have a huge responsibility in his life. Can you, reprimand is maybe the wrong word, but like can you say that he's not doing something right? Like do you navigate it differently with your daughters? So what I do is with him, what I do is with him, I definitely cut him a lot more slack than his mom does,

but it's his mom's role, I'm the disciplinarian. When I step in, it's almost very old school with it, I step in and that, because I understand, and I always use the same word with him. When I say, listen, your relationship with your father is sacred. That's a sacred thing. That is your father.

So anything, you always wanna go. If you're feeling conflicted, I'm telling you now, go with what your dad thinks, because that is a sacred relationship. And he, I say, there's no one that's gonna ever love you like your mom and dad. Even though I love you with everything, your mom and dad, it's a sacred thing

that I only understand because I have that sacred bonds with your sisters. But that doesn't mean I love you as much as you can imagine. But it's a thing from nature that's just something you'll understand when you have kids. But I get involved in a bigger way when I feel like a man needs to say something to him. Like when I see him, it's not about the schoolwork

or they're not listening or whatever, but when I see, I come on when he gets disrespectful to Jasmine or to our daughters, I don't say, don't you talk to her like that. I say, what you've just done buddy is you've taken the easy way out. It's much easier to yell back at your mom and your sisters. It's much harder to say I'm a man

and what I'm gonna do is process what you said and walk away But what I'm gonna do and go fucking punch a wall Don't take the easy way out, you know, it's so easy to yell back at your mom It's so easy to tell your sister. She's an idiot. That's that's the easy stuff Yeah, the hard stuff is being is being is being a man, you know, how did you? navigate the relationship with his dad? I am almost immediately from the beginning, where like, because one of the benefits actually of, you know, Jasmine and I had our oldest daughter, Delilah, very quickly into the relationship.

Like we were only dating for a few months and she had conceived a baby. So very quickly, that means her problems or her, not problems, but her parts of her life became parts of my life. And I had to kind of say to myself, again, we're having a child. You would have had kind of ways out of this if she wasn't pregnant, but now you don't.

You have a child, so this is your life now. So choose peace as much as you can. Every opportunity to choose peace. So when father got introduced to me,. So when Father got introduced to me, Tristan's father got introduced to me, I immediately shook his hand and said, I'm about to have a baby with Jasmine. That's, I look at you, I look at this

as the baby inside my girlfriend is your son's brother or sister. So we're connected here and I'm looking at this as the three of us, as it takes a village, there are three parents. I look at this as like a beautiful thing for our kids. They have three parents. They have like an extra hand.

So I don't want this to ever feel like this is your family, this is mine. Let's all do this as one. And I think from that, we always have, and we have a respectful relationship where it's like, you know, you're not gonna be, there could be an opportunity to be best friends, but it's like when we see each other, it's cordial,

it's cool, there is, we also made an agreement, him and I, each other said, there will be no ever, there will be no talking bad about the mother of one of the kids. Not about the mother of our children. We will not do that. And if we, you know, we would say something to each other, if like you're speaking, just remind you,

it's the mother of our kids here. So like she needs to be sacred and held to a high standard. So I think that for us, again, and that's for my father, though my father would always preach to me, you gotta do the harder thing. What's the harder thing? Usually 99% of people are gonna take the easy way. You'll go with the easy thing.

It's very easy to pontificate online about, like you were saying, nobody knows I ran in Israel. And that's true, because it's easy to just spout off shit that you read in the headline. It's harder to do the research and actually take months and go to Tehran and see what the people are actually living. Most people aren't gonna do that. So most people don't know.

So my dad would always preach that. What is the harder thing? And I remember he told me, and my stepmother told me, because my parents were divorced, my stepmother told me, listen, when I met Jasmine, she said, you're about to be a stepdad. You're gonna be a dad in nine months, but you're gonna be a stepdad.

You're a stepdad right now. It's the most thankless job in the world. You have to give the same love and energy and the same support as a parent, but you will most likely, for a very long time, not get any appreciation or respect for it, and you have to override nature because you are not bonded to this child by nature,

and almost every other animal in the animal kingdom will kill that baby in the wild because it is not theirs. So you have to override systems that are so deeply embedded in you that it's very difficult and what you have to do is just say this is the hard thing, but it's the right thing and you have to keep doing that over and over and over again. So that's why I do that.

And it's worked out though. It's worked, well we're getting a divorce. But yeah, so far so good. Now we're coming into some years, my substance is about to be 15, so there will be I'm sure challenges of a teenager, of a teenage boy, but I'm hoping that, you know, my substance is about to be 15, so there will be, I'm sure, challenges of a teenager, of a teenage boy, but I'm hoping that, you know, I'm just gonna keep with that, you know,

that same principle that I say, do the hard thing, the hard thing's usually the right thing. And you know, you keep a loving relationship with them. I mean, for me, it's like, again, and even if I take it from a selfish point of view of I only care about my children, well then you should care about, that's their big brother. Your children are gonna be on those times

when you're not around because your kids don't wanna be with you, they're gonna be around their brother because they're similar in age, and don't you want him respecting them and loving them and being the big brother because then they'll be better girls. So either way, whether you look at it selfishly or unselfishly, the answer is love your stepson.

Yeah, yeah, 100%. No, it's just, yeah. God, won't be kills me in a murder-suicide That would be poetic play this at my funeral Yeah, I'll be wild yeah, they go back and be like wow was he wrong about that The whole side was wrong. He turned 16 and then was kingdom flipped on him. Jesus. The FBI is actively investigating him right now because he has a list and I'm number one.

But here's the deal. True crime is so popular of a genre. Yeah, why do you think? We are gonna run out of content. We need content creators. Someone's gotta go do it. I guarantee you Mr. B starts killing people. Yes.

Somebody's gotta, we gotta keep up with this demand. We're running out. I mean, it's just running out. Why is there this true crime obsession? Because we can get the thrill of what it is to kill someone without experiencing, because everybody deep down wants to kill someone, because like I said,

we're the most savage type of homo-safety. It's mostly women that watch it. Women are crazy. Yeah, I don't understand it at all. Well, maybe that's just how much they hate other women, is they like to watch them get murdered. Seriously. And they just watch watch them get murdered. Seriously. And they just watch and go, you stupid bitch.

You dumb bitch. You don't marry a guy who owns a fucking boat. You fucking dumb bitch. You're gonna end up dead on that fucking boat. Dumb, stupid bitch. Do your girls like true crime? Mine does not, I don't like it. My girl likes a...

True lives and Mormon Wives. She's got good taste. She likes Frasier. She watches reruns of Frasier. Mine loves Housewives and shit, but she only does True Crimes. My wife likes that too. They all love the Housewives. We hope that they're watching it to laugh at them. That's what we hope. I think for them, we hope it's not inspiration. They go brain dead when they watch it. That's a good sentence you need. That's a reset.. I think for them it's like, we hope it's not inspiration. They go like brain dead when they watch it. They're just like, they just kind of like.

That's good, sometimes you need that to reset. It's like meditation. It's our sports, I think. Yes, exactly. That's exactly it. They're only capable of like free agency gossip and all that. That's what they do. That's what they do.

That's what they do. That's what they do. They're watching Housewives, I'm watching Brian Windhorst. That's why the WNBA just has to admit. Listen, women are never going gonna be into women's sports because their favorite sport is trying to destroy each other with fake compliments, that's what they like. So what you have to do is stop trying to get women

to like it and get men to like it. So no more lesbian dressing, everyone in fucking miniskirts, let's see some titties. But what you're saying is happening. I think, first of all, this season season or last season they all just became hot yeah crazy Angel Reese, they're all hot. One of my favorite videos that I was just watching them walk into the arena. I watch with a tub of acid next to me. I gotta admit there's this account. I mean I don't know the guys. Who's that girl that uh, that Cedra or whatever, what's her name, Yachty was talking about

her. Beautiful. Tamra Brink? No, no, no, I don't even think she's in the league anymore. They should have kept her in though. Yeah, but there's this dude who he's an Instagram guy and he does this Smash Olympic, like Smash playoffs of all the WNBA teams, smash or pass, and it's very funny. And he goes through all of the teams,

and he's like smash, pass, respectfully, and it's really fucking funny. It's gorgeous. Have you seen the guys that do the, they're betting on Angel Reese missing her first shot? She shoots like, yeah. But like, they're up to 10 games, and it's just four of them. And they just watch the beginning of the game.

And they just wait for her to get the ball. And then they go fucking crazy. But it is true. It's like, once Kaitlyn came to the league, she started playing in a way that we wanted to play. Like, there's no guy that, I mean, outside of like NBA players, that doesn't wish that they had Kaitlyn's game.

I want to be able to pull up from the fucking logo. She could do it. The second the game transfers to our interest point, we're invested. We're watching. So I think you're right. It's like in order to get women's sports, in order for women's sports to be incredibly popular, you need to get the people who like sports to watch, which are men. Which are men.

You're not going to transition all these women into girls that watch sports. No, and it's the same principle. Like me and my girl got into a fight the other day because she was like, I was talking about the WNBA and how I was watching it. And I was like, you know, my daughter, my girl got into a fight the other day, cause she was like, I was talking about the WNBA and how I was watching it, and I was like, my daughter, my older daughter, I was like, oh, maybe she'll like it, whatever, cause I can't really get her into sports.

It's like a thing, I'm like trying so hard to get my older daughter into sports. She just does not wanna play and I don't know what to do. So, and so, and so I'm trying to get her to watch. And then Jazz is like, oh, please, you know you're only just watching cause you think the girls are hot. That's why you know, Kaitlyn Clark's on the fever.

I was like, A, yes, but she's awesome. But I was like, you don't think it's the same for you? She's like, no, I watch sports because it's fun. I'm like, really? You're telling me you knew Danny Amandola Stats, the random one from the Patriots? You just wanted to have sex with him. That's just what it is, so it's the same principle.

And then she just wanted the other room to start cooking dinner. I think Haley Clark, I think the long ball is kind of like the dunk to men, since women can't dunk like that, the long ball's like the dunk, so now it's like. And Steph opened that up. Once the NBA transitioned into a three-point shooting league,

WNBA got popular. So Steph really made women's basketball exciting. I'm talking about beautiful person. Stephanie Curry, bro. That's what it's like. She Steph really made women's basketball exciting. I'm talking about beautiful Steph. Stephanie Curie, bro. She's gorgeous. He would be the hottest player in the Phoenix Mercury. I'm not saying there's anything wrong with lesbians. The lesbians are great.

There's not a lot of lesbians in the world. So just from a marketing standpoint, it's just harder to market that. No more cornrows and baggy clothes, girls. Okay. That's nice. So lesbians, just pretend to be straight for fucking the marketing of it. Just walk in hot and then you can go,

get pussy and do whatever you gotta do. But just be a girl on the walk-in. That's what we need. Listen, guys, thank you so much for being here. History Eyeiness is back, you guys already know that, but make sure you check it out. Giannis Pappas, property owner, is out right now on YouTube. You filmed it at the mothership, hilarious.

Thank you, sir. Guys, go check that out. Chrissy, you got the special out on Hulu. I got a special out on Hulu. Go check it out. There's tour dates until December. Through December, ChristieComedy.com, your boy's trying to repay his mortgage.

Yeah, my date's YannisPappasComedy.com. YannisPappasComedy.com, thank you guys so much for being here. We appreciate you. Love y'all, man. This. YanisPappasComedy.com, thank you guys so much for being here. We appreciate you. Thanks for y'all. This was a nice reunion. This was awesome. Thank you. Yeah, happy Juneteenth!