Andrew Schulz's Flagrant with Akaash Singh - Knicks WIN + Ali Siddiq's Best Prison Stories

Episode Date: June 17, 2026

Yeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeerrrrr - we got the prolific Ali Siddiq in the studio today, talking about: - Appreciating different eras - Respecting the originals - Reminiscing over Andrew beating Jay Williams - Comedy now and how crowds have been conditioned - Enjoying a good vacation - Thoughts on Kevin Hart Roast and much, much more! Timestamps: 0:00 knicks WIN 5:15 Another special already? 6:00 Does Houston claim Drake? Top 3 + The originals 11:30 Johnny Carson, The Bonanza + Carol Burnett 17:23 Pryor, Cosby & Rickles + Chinese Tearjerkers 18:44 Vigilantism + Lets Rap About It 21:21 Different eras, Chucks + Crossovers + Muslim NBA 30:44 Bill Russell = Incredible + Travel NBA 36:10 Greatest sporting event + 21 42:14 Georgetown, Patrick Ewing + Duke 45:33 Andrew beat Jay Williams 54:25 Hatewatching in 90s + Denise Austin 1:00:26 Comedy now, Conditioning + Clips 1:06:05 Storytelling, disruption + Crowd work 1:12:09 Impressions, Originality + Touring 1:23:15 Pressure on young comics + Curation 1:29:21 Striving to always improve, Early success + Running it 1:35:11 The new special, Ali's father + Family Vacay 1:41:12 Disconnecting, Turks & Caicos + "I can swim" 1:50:31 Breaking his clavicle 1:56:41 Kevin Hart Roast + Industry roast is different This episode is sponsored by Kalshi. This episode is sponsored by Sesh. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Hey guys, look, we got a great episode with Ali Sadiq today. Tanya got married this weekend. They ran out of toilet paper. Or it was some ceremonial thing where I got an amazing blessing. You guys decide, anyway, before this amazing episode with Ali Sadiq, there are some things that we have to address, some very important things that have happened in the world. The Knicks, after 53 years, are NBA champions.

I'm so excited about it. I don't, uh, I don't know. I think this is a cool moment because people have actually realized, like, the only sport New Yorkers all care about is basketball. Their New Yorkers care about baseball. There's New Yorkers who care about football. There's New Yorkers who care about hockey. But the only one that all of us come together to care about as a part of every single New Yorker's identity is basketball. And that's because that's the only sport that we can all play growing up. Like my high school didn't have a fucking baseball diamond. You know, didn't have a football stadium.

We had a basketball team barely. It wasn't even a home court. We had to go to this place called Basketball City. It was like a facility that we would play our home games on. And, but yeah, so it's just it's the sport that means to most to us. And, you know, we've suffered through, you know, half a century of losing. And never got, well, we were bitter. But we never lost.

hope. We never lost hope. And hope is the religion of New York City. Yeah, not to get too, like, existential, but that is what drives New York City. Like, nobody moves to New York City because they don't have, because they, they just want to kind of like, see what it's life, like to live a mediocre life. Like, you move here because you have hopes and dreams and you hope to achieve them in New York, and we never lost hope. It's just the weirdest thing. Like, every single year, we'd have this, like delusional Knicks fan thing where like we're like yeah this is the year we're taking it all the way with Emmanuel Moodye you know and Jared Jack and shout out to both of them but like Enos Cantor is going to bring us a chip we would believe we believed every single year for 42

years of my life 53 years of other people's lives and um I think that's fucking awesome it makes it that much sweeter it makes it that much sweeter that like every single year felt like our year. Like I was looking through my phone. People are said to be videos. People said to me videos of like a decade ago of me going, nah, Knicks are taking it this year. And then you look at the light-ups of these teams. There's no way the Knicks are taking it this year. But we believe that is one of those beautiful things about New York. And even the people that moved to New York to make a life years, they truly believe. They believe something crazy, something magical can happen. And that's exactly what we all got to witness. Also, I'm doing this movie out in California in the

shaped my mustache and it took like five, 10 years off of my life. I feel like I'm on guide code again. It's absolutely insane. I don't even know if I'm looking into the right part. I don't even know where the camera is. I'm recording this on my phone, obviously. But yeah, they snatch my stash, bro. The games were nuts. We're going to get to this episode. It's phenomenal episode. You guys are going to love it. This is the jersey that I wore when we finished it up. Game 5 in San Antonio. I was at game 3, 4, and 5. How fucking lucky. How lucky. How incredible. Think about that.

Think about that. Four was the greatest sporting event that I'll ever experience in my entire life. I'll never experience anything like that. That is it. It's all downhill from here when it comes to sporting events. And then five was just complete euphoria. Like, I got to be honest, like, the San Antonio fans were very cool. They're very sweet, like, they're great fans.

And they're used to winning. So I think it's, you know, they're not, like, combative. Like, but with all due respect to San Antonio fans, it was a home game in there. I mean, I'm being conservative when I say this, 40% of the arena next fans. They were booing Spurs players while they shot free throws at home. It was, anyway, okay, I've talked too long on this, but God bless New York, man. We can start focusing on the World Cup after the parade on Thursday. shout out the tartan army the scottish taking over boss that the world cup is really like an amazing

event like outside of the sport like it's just it might be like the most incredible active humanity that exists just seeing people from all around the world embrace different cultures and see like the most beautiful passionate parts of them and yeah it's it's pretty awesome whatever we'll talk about that i'll be out here for a few weeks we've recorded uh bank some some some dope apps for you guys to check out so enjoy ali sadique It's got some amazing stories. You're going to find out who the hottest white woman in prison was. Just some amazing, like, stand-up stuff.

And just great, great episode, hilarious guy. You know, it's almost drowned. Great story about that. I mean, just awesome stuff. So enjoy. Love you guys so much. God bless the Knicks. God bless New York City.

God bless you all. Peace. What's up, everybody? And welcome to Flagrant. And today we are joined by a favorite guest of ours who is back. I think one of the most prolific comedians out right now, maybe ever, just the volume is absolutely insane. He is yet another special.

Do you know how annoying it is? You have released multiple specials before I barely got back on the road from my last special. And I'm here to celebrate. I have to celebrate you. Well, also like, man, I'm not working hard enough. Man, it's Ali Sadiq. He's back in the building. Listen, this is perfect timing, you know, because Houston's own just put out a triple album, you know.

So, uh, Houston's home. Do you, do, does Houston claim, does he seem claim Drake? Um, I like how we're getting political right off the top. Well, I don't think my era claims Drake. I think whatever that area is, he's in claims him. But I've never been. Oh, Drake's from Houston. I'm like, no, I don't even.

I don't think I ever even said Drake hung out and he used them. Really? It's not, it's not a, I'm not a, this is what it is a trait. Okay, music, okay, cool, music is cool. But it was cool. I love you, bro. I love you. I love it.

The second I saw him in Justin's seat, I'm like, all right, take it away, man. It's taking it away. Let me tell you something. So, the music was cool because it is, to me. Yeah. Because it was so much familiar music that I had already heard. heard growing up. So I could see the emulation in

when you did the two short jump, when you did the pimp C. John, when you did So it's like, it's familiar to, it's familiar to me. I'm like, oh, okay, I remember this, but it's not really celebrating. You were celebrating the era where I know you got it from. Right.

It was saying, so I wasn't like, oh, Drake's demand. I've never gave him that lyrically. So, really? I mean, it's better lyricists than Drake.

Who for you is top three, top five? Lyrics? Just lyrics. Oh, just lyrics. The story's telling guru of all times

is slick Rick. How he paints a picture is phenomenal. Yeah, okay. Then you have to, can I put them together? Because I heard somebody say that another group

was the greatest group of hip hop of all times. I was like, so, y'all never heard of Run DMC but Who'd they say was the other greatest group?

And I like both Outcast? Alcasts. And I like both groups. That's hard to do. But you can't, it's just one of them things you're going to put over a run

and Darrow Mack? This is where like our age is showing a little bit. Like the way something affects you when you're in your formative years, you know, like It's like the way that we look at Jordan, nobody could look at Jordan that grew up with LeBron. But see, the thing is, before Jordan, because I didn't grow up yelling Jordan. It was always Dr. Jay.

It was at different era. Not even Hakeem when you're in Houston? No, Hakeem came with Jordan. I'm 52. They was already, I'm a bean. I'm living already. I'm already watching basketball. So Dr. J was number one.

Dr. Jay was the number one guy. Even over Kareem. I didn't grow up yelling Kareem. Even though I'm trying to get the sky look down. But you want to play like Dr. J. Dr. J was crazy. Join him on to play like Dr. J. So the thing is, how do you, and I'm just not one of the people that skip over the original idea for the take on the idea.

Especially if you live. through the original idea. I'm old as hip hop, but hip hop wasn't... Oh, shit. Just think about it. Hip hop did turn 50. That's crazy. It's 52, now.

I'm 52. So I remember when it... It wasn't hip hop yet. It wasn't... The Voltron hadn't happened yet. Could you say MC? It was rapping. It was just called rapping.

It wasn't the dancing yet in the fashion and all of these things. It hadn't combined yet to become hip hop. Wasn't it also like there was like a DJing aspect too? DJing, you know, but that's the part with the MC for the beat. But and then this thing, before people had beat machines, I had a dude named Herb. Okay. He's beating on his chest.

He beat on the car. You look at his mouth. It's a human jock box. It's that boys. the skinny boys. They're doing Duggy Fresh. It was like, make the music with your mouth be it's.

What they think this game? What they thought he was doing? He was beatbox. So it wasn't a, hey, this is by, this is a mustard on the beat. No, it's Herb on the beat. Herb is the beat.

That's so funny. So, you know, you got to think about how the overall thing, like when you talk about great producers, they're talking about everybody else but leave out Herbie Love, or Herbie Havis. Like, how do you leave out these people who, in the beginning, the beginning people.

You know, Herbie Hancock was on the, what was he on a constitution? No, no, John Hancock. John Hancock. That's a signature. That's his nephew. His nephew, Herbie. That's the thing. You can't, it's like, even with, like, podcasting or late-night show.

How do you just put somebody else over the original idea? Because it was somebody that originally did this first. Who was your original for the late night shows? Oh, man, you going to have to go Johnny Carson. Now, would you consume Carson, like, in your house? Yeah, I'm a kid. It's like when I'm growing up, Johnny Carson is coming on this TV. Well, we were growing up, there was one TV.

So it was like a house. We had two TVs. You had one at the bottom that didn't work that good. And then you put the other one. That's two TV. Like it was a familial event watching something. Together. Exactly.

Like Bonanza. Man, I'm never going to not like Bonanza. I don't know. This is my first soap opera. This is like, oh, man, this is a great show. Like, I grew up, Carol Bennett, right? This is my first comedic, you know, person. You know, there's a, you know,

There's a, oh, man, this is, do you understand bonanza? No, bro. Let me tell you. I hope you guys are watching a video of this. Look how fly that. Man, look at this jacket, bro. The jacket is great. That jacket's going hard.

Look at the scar. I had that on last night. And that's the thing. Like, yo, this is, this is, man, this is a classic show. And things always happen. And, and, it's like, look, look, this guy's backhand. That's the standard for. back in the day.

Things are always happening. I'm talking my own bonanza, yo. This is just white shaft. If I could do... White shab. No, no. You got to get to look,

watch out now. You know, the car rights, the car rights are the first like cowboy mob family. Like, there's nothing jumping off without car rights. If I could do a black

version of this, it'd be crazy. They need to bring this back, man. But now, I'm telling you, if you sit down and watch Bonanza, then you'll call me and be like,

Yo, Bonanza's crazy. This is a great show. But just think, my first comedic influenced Carol Burnett. It's not the watching, listen to Richard Pryne albums. I'm first interested in comedy because of how funny Carol Burnett was.

I would watch the Carol Burnett show and it was hysterical. Really? Like, Carolinette show is hysterical. Like, if you go back and you look at all the shows that we watched that we came up on, like, I have a strong argument when people try to say that, you know, TV is an idiot box. No, it's the idiot that's in front of the box. That's what you choosing to watch. You know what I'm saying?

It's like if you sit up, oh, man, you talking about a hysterical show. This show is hysterical. It's like, and all the different characters that. Carol Burnett played. It's like she doesn't get enough recognition amongst people for comedy because this is like

this came on to, man. He just walked in with this thing. It's crazy. Like, this is a crazy show. So, I went back and watched a bunch

of I Love Lucy. Oh, man. And I was shocked at how funny it was. Yeah. What? Like, because in my mind, I don't know, sometimes I watch old stand-up, like Lenny Bruce. And I'm like, I can appreciate what it was in the time, but it's not funny to me now the way it was then.

But I'll watch I Love Lucy and I was expecting to be the same thing. Like corny jokes, I don't know. It was legit funny situations. So the thing is, you said that it's not funny as it was back then. You would have to travel back at time and go back then and be like, yo. The context. But you have people that have transcended time. I think Prior does that.

You know, a lot of people do it. Pryor's like top tier. And I think that people get, when Pryor is not your focus, oh, it's prior, or like, I like Richard Pryor. But he wasn't Cosby to me. Yeah. Cosby was. And Cosby still holds up. Like, well, comedically.

Cosby is like the pinnacle. And then you have, you have Don Rickles. You have Don Rickles. Don holds up. And that's the thing. You have comics throughout comedy history that hold the test of time. But it's hard with stand-up, though, man. It's very hard.

There are like movies that you can watch from back in the day, and you can be like, holy shit, this is an amazing film. And there's a lot of them. Like, you can watch Shawshank Redemption right now, and you can be like, this is one of the best films I've ever seen in my life. I'll watch, like, shitty action movies from when I was a kid. And I'd be like, this is, this is Armageddon? I showed my wife Armageddon.

She's like, how did I not know about this movie? I was like, because you were zero when he came out. He just described Armageddon to me. I was like, what was a movie about it? And he just explains it. And three minutes of the explanation, he starts going, I started crying, bro. He went upon the asteroid and blew it up. No, no, no, that, that's not.

He's trying to cry and just explain that. And he goes, requesting permission to shake the hand of the daughter of the bravest man I've ever met that shit. I can't even talk about right now. I can't talk about right now, bro. That's a movie. Shout out of the smartest, man. The legend.

It's like, you sound like my mom when she watched it off of the gentleman. When he came through, he carried her through the thing. I saw a TikTok that fucked me up today, man. There's something about my algorithm where, like, seeing Chinese dads, like, from China,

like give up their daughter. in like marriage or whatever like that, they got to take the hand and put the hand in the husband's hand. And it's like, it's over. And there's this one where like he says it, isn't Chinese, but they're sub-telling. He might not even be saying this shit.

He might be like, take this bitch, I'm done with her, right? But it says, if you ever don't, if you ever find yourself not in love with her, please bring her back to me or something like that. And I was like, God damn. Oh, here it is. Oh, he's speaking English. I didn't even know.

I didn't even know it. They got the COVID mask on. Because you're not used to seeing them get emotional. You don't see them emotional. I think that you're not used to seeing... Chinese people in motion. No. I don't see it off.

You don't see it that often. I see white people and black people and Latinos get emotion. But Chinese emotion, you never see that shit. They're stoic. They'll wait 50 years for revenge. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But they don't just cry.

And my whole algorithm is just Asian dads It's the whole algorithm Bringing down That's it And it gets me every single time What gets you? What gets you? You're an emotional guy

Just kids You know Something happening with kids It bothers me You know If I could If they would If the United States

Would legally allow me to be like a vigilante and anybody who hurt kids and you just let me take care of it I would do it like I would sign up right away You wouldn't be a vigilante and they would give me a list

Like these are all the people that you can legally take out of here any type of way you want to because they hurt kids I'm like I would be so diligent on that list like Santa Claus Like my list I would be getting it done

They would be amazed And I would come back Like, no, no, he's done like four lists Like everybody else is still on their first list But he's like he's getting the business Yeah Like I'm like yo This list kind of short ain't like

Like this is just in one city Because I'm oh yeah it's gonna be And I'm gonna do it I'm gonna do it It's gonna be bad Like it's gonna be bad Like I'm leaving By these places like in bad

He's like, you want to He was on the list. Yeah. And I'm like, I'll be like what they call Malika Malt. I'm not wavering. Like, I'm not, like, it's nothing you can say to me. Like, it's like, once you see me and you know that you're on this list, you know you did something. That's it.

Like, oh, it's, hey, bro, it is what it is. Like, you have seen? Jason. No, what's that movie? Um, no country for old men. Oh, yeah, yeah. Oh, boy. Yeah, yeah.

That was on there with the, with the, yeah. Javier Bardem plays the guy. Oh, he was, yo, flip the coin. Oh, you ain't got to do this. Yeah, we got to do it. I don't even have no coin. I'm like, you're on the list.

It's a mistake. I don't know about that. You got to do that whenever you get the chance. If you had the same name as someone you know is on the list, you got to change your name. Oh, man. Because Ali's coming. I'm coming.

I'm coming. Like, and I, and I, and I, and I, I got plans for you. Like, I'm, like, I've already thought about what I'm doing. Each one's going to be different, but it's going to be a bag. Whether the little bag or a small bag. He was like, yo, did you see the one that he left? It was just like a soup bag.

It was like a bag with a oil? Like a crab blow. Yo, he's wild. Have you seen Dexter? You're familiar with Dexter, right? He goes out and kills serial killers? Yeah. Or he kills bad people, right?

He kills bad people. I thought it was a serial killers. No, it's like. It's like anybody, it's only Syracos? It's just like anybody was bad. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's fine. We like that.

That's kind of. I would, I would definitely be like, like, he did a job. Could you deal with the violence aspect, though? Like, would that be difficult? He just said it'd be bad. Like, what? Like, what? Like, what?

Do you know the, oh, fuck, what's the name of it? Let's rap about it? You know, let's rap about it, Pott. It's got Mano, Jim Jones, Davies and Fabulous. Do you, have you seen these guys? Bro, they were doing, they asked them a question. They're like, what would you do if you guys weren't rapping? And then they said different things.

Like, maybe I'd be in fashion. Maybe I do days. We may do that. And then Mano goes, I'd be a serial killer. It's not a job, bro. It's a hobby. This is the exact attitude right now. I wasn't a comic.

I'd be a chef. You know, I already know. You know, still cutting stuff. You know, that take me back to thinking about when people talk about errors of things. So I was doing somebody else's podcast, not going to give them the name. Shout them out. I don't know. I'm not trying to shout them out.

Oh, okay, okay, okay. I was giving a take on something on somebody else's podcast. And I'm talking from what happened in the 90s. Yeah. Then somebody else was on that same podcast and said, what I said was BS. But then I went and looked up when they were locked up. They were locked up in 2014. Ah, so it's a very different time.

It's a different time. And I think that some guys, and I text to the person in the podcast, I say, from what I'm hearing, what I'm not going to allow you to do is get me into no beef with somebody over an era that they didn't understand. Right. I was like, because it'll go there, and that's the thing. But me being intelligent enough to understand that you're speaking from a different era than what this was. That's like me talking about, oh, what would have never happened in the 50s?

I wasn't in the 50s. Can't say. I just know what was happening in the night. And sometimes people speak on things without understanding the era. Yeah, that's podcasting. Yeah. It's kind of the medium. Yeah, and that's the thing.

It's like people. But if you're in the room, it's kind of difficult. When you're in a room with someone who's had the experience, it's kind of difficult to be like, now you didn't have that experience that you're telling me about. But the great thing is, this person had an experience, but in 2014, it's not the same. same in 1993 in 2014.

You didn't even have, y'all don't even have canned goods when you were locked up. Yeah. You had pouches. So how are you going to talk about what we would have did in 93 when we had canned goods? Yeah, yeah. Two different eras. Yeah. You know, I remember when people

used to drink out of the water holes outside or out of a hydrant, just random. you turn on but now it's oh, like I'll never forget my cousin was thirsty

and I had some water and I was like here he's like man I ain't drinking that to you like since win like since win like what are you talking about we shared a garden

we drank out of the same jug in the house like what are you talking about I ain't half of my ice cream and you ate the other half you invite you're insane like then I had one cousin

who still lives in that era. Like, I was, what that fool said to me? He's like, yo, man, scratch my back. I'm like, I don't scratch your back. What, you're gay? I was like, because I know I would have scratched his back then,

and he's like, no, no, no. You can't get into it. I'm like, yo, I'm like, and then after then like, yo, you still, it's like, no, I'm like, I'm like, all right, why you can't stop? I thought you were joining yourself. It's like It's a different

It's different area Like we talked about the chucks, right? Yeah This is the original color. There was no color Chucks And we dyed them With food color

It's in like east eggs If they want to know the color We would die them If they're like I refuse He told us they sold chucks At the grocery store Yeah Like any

You can get chucks anywhere The freezer section And they was, the high tops was $12. Yeah. The low tops was eight. So just imagine, I remember I'm in, I'm like mid-40s at the time, and I'm appalled. I'm like, y'all, I'm going to go buy me a fresh pair of chucks. Yeah.

And I went in them chucks was like $50 or so. It was like, $64 in taxes. I was like, I'm not buying, I'm not paying this for no jugs. I'm not buying a real sneaker. And I refused. He's just a bunch of vegetables and went home I'm left I'm like I ain't buying these shoes

crazy I bought something like maybe three months ago I bought some black ones to start doing squats in because they're flat Don't work out in these shoes Don't put yourself through that I think that's why they dribbled like that back in the day

You can't cross over in these Yeah you're talking about. There's no point. That's one of the things. People talk about who had the best crossover. I'm always still say Tim Hardaway. Well, because of it was no... It's a different crossover.

It was no this. No, it was quick. It wasn't no carry. It was a... It was in, so, or Skip to Maloo. Oh, wow. Skip to Maloo, we had a crazy crossover. I'm saying.

Tim's was deceptive, man. Because Tim was so shifty. And, like, I'm a Knicks fan, so I got to see Tim's crossover. I'm a Nick's fan. So I'm like, Tim was crazy. But look at that. It was the between the leg cross. A lot of people just do that regular cross in front.

But he would go, oh, yeah, he was filthy. Just filthy. And then who had, who the next? Abdul Ravh. Right after that. His cross was bananas. Yeah, but it's not, that carrying. He didn't pledge allegiance, bro.

Man, but still, he was still in that. Everybody apologized to him. They did the documentary on that. They knew they was wrong for that. What happened? This guy was basically like Steph before Steph. Way before. Like lights out shooter.

And what was the deal? He wouldn't stand for the National Anthem or something like that. Yeah, he didn't want to stand for it. And but he was unbelievable. Who did he play for? Wow, he was taking a knee back then. The Nuggets. Denver Nuggets.

Yeah. But he was filthy. He came from LSU. I mean, unbelievable. I'm tomorrow. Unbelievable player. The pull-up was crazy. Like, I remember when he gave Chicago the business.

50 piece? Oh, this is the part that people don't say about this. So they, he's, giving everybody the business. So then they try to put everybody on him, everybody. And Scottie, they, Jordan grabbed Scottie, like, you hold him. Too. And then Scottie was getting roasted.

Then Jordan tried to hold him. He cooked Jordan. Wow. And then they put, like, Paxton on it on a curry or somebody. Can't do it. And it was, and it was crazy. I never heard of this, but. You remember him.

This was like a big story back in the day. Oh, damn it. You got a couple of years. He was cooking. I mean, just filthy. Quick release. Again, it was a very different game. They didn't shoot threes like they do now, but like just lights out.

Like it was, it was. And so the team dropped him and no one resigned him because he wouldn't stand for the. Basley blackballed him. Yeah, they blackballed him. They did the same thing to Craig Hodges, though. Yeah, well, because he didn't go to the White House. He was not because he wore a dash she could to the White House. What?

Really. Yep. If you was Muslim and you were in the NBA at this time, you were getting, you were getting shun. It's like when they talk about the 50 greatest centers, they talk about the greatest centers, they leave out Hakeem all the time, which is insane. No, that's crazy. Nobody's leaving out Hakeem from the top 50 centers.

Oh, man, they do it all. They do it all. You can't. No, I'm talking about when they do the top. 50 players ever. When they do the top five center of me. Ah, okay. When they do the top five,

Kareem, Bill Russell, Shack, not in this order, Hakeem. You put two Muslims up there. I mean, like, who else would you put there? Kareen, Bill Russell, Will, Shaq, Hakeem. Hakee got the rings, Pat Ewing doesn't have the rings. Who else would be there?

They'd be throwing all type of people there. I'm glad that you mentioned Bill Russell. Because they'll lead Bill Russell out as the greatest player that played the... I'm like, but... Bill Russell is... He was playing against the Mormons. Like, what? He was playing against...

Only one, guys? He was playing against everybody that was available. with a play against. That's true. That's true. That's very true. It's like they don't take, they don't take, this is a this new NBA is a travel, in the travel league. In Boston, think about this. Like Boston is like

divided, segregated races as fuck. Like, they let him coach. That's how incredible. They let him coach and play. He played and coached and he won to race. Yes. Wow. As he played in coach. There's no player today that can serve himself out.

Wait, he was playing a coach at the same time? He was playing the coach at the same exact time. How many rings that he won? Two. He won two as a player coach, but before that he won nine. And I mean, yeah, this is a time where he couldn't even stay at, I think, similar hotels when they went down south and shit. Like, it was an insane. But was the play always just passed it to me? No, he was defensive specialist.

Yeah, that. He would control the whole game. And he's six-eight. Yeah. And amazing rebounder. Wow. My dad said that's the most dominant person. My dad said that's the most dominant person he ever saw play the game was Bill Russell.

And this is during Wilt when Wilt is putting up, like, insane, like, video game numbers. But he said Russell could dominate the game defensively in a way to, like, you just never seen. And people just will just skip on. Oh, they skip all the way to whoever's current. But when I watch, when I watch LeBron, no, knock on LeBron, LeBron, a good player. But if LeBron does 10. 10 get the ball 10 times

and he scores 10 times out of those 10 he's traveled 6 like a legit I would be the most hated referee if I was

if I was refereeing right now I'm like yo I don't care how fantastic it look you travel it's thing because it ain't no gather step now now we got to gather step

it's been two steps and you in the hell not anymore Not anymore. Like they make it up rules. Yeah, they found the way to add some more steps in there. Oh, bro. I watched, it was a fantastic play on the other night.

Dude dunked on the dude. And I went back and I rewounded. I said, now look at all these steps. Four steps. It was five. Yeah, yeah. It was five steps. They kind of let you do whatever you want on the fast break.

Have you noticed that? You do the fast break. You should pick up the ball wherever you want, dunk it. Then, when me. LeBron traveling competition. with just one bounce and shit like that? Is he holding the ball at that time?

He was probably holding the ball right then. Walking. LeBron be traveling, man. One, two, three, four. LeBron is crazy. One, two, three. It doesn't care. One, two, three.

Yeah. They're talking about, oh, these, they can't, names of people who are going to. Yo, he's literally walking. No, you got to get the Russell. Let the ball. One, two, three, four. Like, yo, what are you doing?

Like, ball going other way. Like, are you insane right now? Get the Russell Westberg travel. This is a legendary... He didn't even... Russell Westbrook. Wow. Oh, now they call it.

They called that one. They couldn't believe it. He's like, what? What did I do? Look at watch this, watch this. Oh, Russell is literally walking down. Just watch this. Hold on, watch.

Oh, I've seen this. This is crazy. You know, what are you doing? What are you doing? He was coming home from school. What are you doing, bro? I remember, brother's like, what? Y'all don't do, you know?

So only the wrong can do this, what? No, bro. He was saying, look at your step. Like, yo, what is he? Look at stuff. Look at stuff. Look at set telling on him. You know, that he's.

It really is a 3-3, like, travel. You're just like playing in the court. You're like, you're a referee. Like, bawled out. All right, man. No, you got a point. Y'all got a point. I'm going to be out in L.A.

shooting a movie this summer, but we added some stand-up shows. So pull on up, man. We're going to be in Pasadena, California, at the Ice House, the 19th and 20th of June. Then the Ontario Improv will be there the 26th and 27th. And then the Brea Improv will be there.

17th and July 18th. And then we're going to be at the Halifax, Nova Scotia, Canada, Great Outdoors Fest, August 8th. So you can go grab tickets to any of those shows if tickets are still available. Theandrewshoulds.com. All right, Mark, what do you got? Oh, I have great news.

I'm going all over at the end of the year. I'm going to Plano, Texas, Chandler, Arizona, Pasadena, California, San Diego, California. And then I'm also going to a couple other spots that are going to be coming up at the end of the year. like Detroit, Michigan, and Salt Lake City, Utah, and I can wait, I can't wait to see you guys all there. Mark Yagnon Live.com. Alex. Guys, my monthly comedy show is back. Canceled Comedy is on June 24th. We have a killer lineup.

Get your tickets at Canceled ComedyX.com. And then my tennis series, The All Love Club.com. The tennis is on July 25th. I'll see you guys there. The first one was fantastic. The second one's going to be even better. car should be exciting, not exhausting. But let's be honest. Sometimes it feels like wandering through a maze blindfolded. You're comparing prices, wondering if the deal is actually good, trying to figure out whether that great opportunity is really a great opportunity, or if you're about to regret it six months later. That's why I love car gurus. When I'm looking at vehicles online, I want the information up front. I don't want to play detective. And with car gurus, you can see deal ratings, price history, and dealer reviews all in one place.

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Car gurus. What is the greatest sporting event you've seen with your own eyes? Like you were in the building or at the event. It's a professional because, man, it's been a kickball. We was down like by nine runs. I'll take that one. And, man, came back, man. Herb on the beatbox.

No, no, no, no. We were, we were. I'll love you. I understand. Everything is not professional. I think that's the thing that people think I was on there. If it's professional, that's the greatest. No.

No, that one meant more to you probably. It does. A little intramural game in college. You start seeing it falling apart. Like, yo, you start to come back. Like, when you come back, I've come back in the game with 21. It was in. Like, I was down.

But I can hoop I was down and it just started In 21 it's a harder game than regular basketball because everybody's again Who's ever playing It's playing you They're going to you Like everybody

If it's nine people playing it's like It's eight against one Every time you touch the ball So to win that game Yeah You know I would love to see Pros Because all of them came up playing 21

Or tip out of whatever I would love to see all the pros Like Ice Q need to add this to the big three. Like just a game of 21 with all pros and tip out count. Now tip out is going to be the worst. Okay, we got to explain to people

who maybe didn't grow up playing 21. So there's a game that you play when you usually have like an odd number of dudes. Like when will you not play 21? I will never not play 21. Meaning like even if it's even. Even if it's even. You're crazy.

Yeah, we're playing 21. That's selfish. No, because why? You don't want to pass. We let everybody play because it's going to be somebody. Let me tell you how. Because you don't want the bum on your team.

How you get an even number of 21. Usually it's, you're right. Let's just explain the game to people real quick. So basically like you usually play it when you had like five guys for whatever. So you didn't want to play two and two and just leave one guy out, whatever. You're waiting for a six. And it's basically everyone for themselves. Everyone can dee up on somebody if they want it.

But usually it's kind of like one-on-one. And you've got to get to 21. And every bucket you score, you get to go to the free throw line. And you get to shoot. One. One. Two and the free throw. Every bucket of two and every free throw and then you have to exactly.

You get three free throws. You get three free throws. But then when you hit 21, you got to hit it from the top of the key. That's what you? Y'all had to hit it from time. I was in anywhere. You know what I'm saying? But once you get to 19, if you miss that shot or you go to the free to save you got 20,

you go to that free throw and you miss. You go back to 15. Yeah. But then there's also the tip in. Yeah. So if you miss a shot, someone reads. bounds and puts it right back in. You go down to 12 or something like that.

You got to catch you in the air. Okay. And then you out. So how do you play even? Okay. So it's everybody that's out there is four people. And I'm not picking Rick. You're the bum.

Rick sucks. So Rick is going to have to play until somebody else's going to. We're playing 21 to somebody else's strong. Because we know, oh, or somebody where it's not fair. Someone's too good. Man, you got somebody who, yo, he played college ball.

We in middle school. We're playing 21. You're not for to get your Duke off on us. Or somebody grown. It will be some grown dude who supposed to be in the league, but liquor got him.

And now he's out there in school. He out there teaching everybody how this really goes why he should have been in the league and he playing 21 he got to put a stipulation on his own stuff

I ain't I ain't gonna be in the paint I'm gonna be in the paint off my outside everything my outside and saying then that's how you end up playing 21 and you want to tip him out bag but he ain't missing

Nope he is not I'm talking he and he's not and he call him y'all come back here with me so I've seen a lot of great shooters for years. Like, I know Steph is,

do you remember Thunder Dan? Yeah, of course. Dan Marley. So Thunder Dan Marley was shooting him and the rifle man and Reggie Miller. It's like, they forget all these long ways.

He's just doing it more. What about Mad Max? Mad Max? You know, Mario Ellie, he made, um, what's my man? Oh, got all the rings. You want to go crazy.

What is it? The Serbian guy. who was nasty and had Zaza, no, something Petrovich. What was my man name? And then he passed away tragically or something like that.

Yeah, he was crazy. But he was on the nets and he put up like a 40 ball. Look what Thunder Dan is shooting from. Yeah, no, it was crazy. Hot, logo. That's it. You know who else is dirty?

Chris Mullen. Chris Mullen. Oh, I remember Chris Mullen. But see, this is the thing. They forget about these people because Steph does it more. The game changed. Also in that like the three-point shot wasn't as big a deal back in a day.

But it was nasty. Yeah, he's filthy. Yeah, he's filthy. Thunder Day was crazy, man. Chris Mullin was insane. Yeah, nasty, nasty. I went to his basketball kid. In the city?

Yeah. Really? He's a city kid. He went to St. John's. That's the single greatest team that was a symbol that never did. Because they coach messed him out. Man, they had Golden State had everybody, bro. It was Chris Mullen.

Was it? Weber. But Hardaway. Hardaway. Chris Mullen, Hardway. They had a squad. It squad was insane. Man.

Coach, man. Why didn't anything happen with them? The coach, man, the coach, man. The coach sucks, man. Coach sucks. How's he under being a Knicks fan? Man, Patrick Ewe. But like, came from Georgetown.

But you were a big Georgetown fan? Yeah. Who wasn't? That was black. That was black. My dad was a Georgetown fan. John Thompson. John Thompson wouldn't put white guys on the team. No, it just wasn't a white guy before.

This is what my racist ass uncle's going to say. How is there a team in Washington, D.C. There's no white players. Like Texas, like West Texas. No, but it was Georgetown, and like, AI was there. Yeah, man, Georgetown was crazy. And this is when, this was when you and... The jerseys were crazy, too.

That was the best jersey. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Remember the starter jackets? Yeah, yeah. The starter jackets was insane. And this was when Pat had the part down the middle. Look, the shaved in. And it was, man, then we was waiting to see what Pat was going.

It was saying, Pat went to the next. He was like, hell, yeah. And then he had the Adidas. the Adidas that was high ass, like super chunky. They, not his own shoes, the U-Ns, when he had the first pair of Adidas, the orange and blue ones, the nick colors. The first pair of Didas was neck. Look at Pat, man. At Georgetown.

That's not the Georgetown jersey, though. That's not gray. I don't know what that one is. It was like gray and black. There it go. Right there. Yeah. John Thompson.

My dad was a Georgetown fan, too. Was that just like? I think it was a black thing. Yeah. Because like Duke kind of felt like the white team or whatever. And then Georgetown felt like the black team. Even though Duke had some nasty, like it was, they had some nasty players. Duke had some nasty.

Yeah, Grant Hill was filthy. Oh, was he? Frank Hill was. Like, he's a guy. Like, if he doesn't have the ankle issues in the league, that's basically like LeBron before LeBron. My fond of Grant Hill. was TSU, Texas University was in the final, was in the tournament. And I never get number 55, whatever his name is.

They up. I don't know why TSU is up. They hit a dude hit three-poena. And Grant Hill is kind of like coasting. Like, you know, I ain't even did nothing yet. And literally dude hit a shot and he's scooting back like, yeah. And I'm sitting there like, no, don't. Don't say nothing to him.

Yeah. Let sleeping dog, man. And then the very next play. It's like, I don't know who threw this ball to Grand Hill, but he dunked. Like, he fell from the rafter. And dunked and swung over in front of the TSU cheerleaders were like, y'all know I'm going to the league, right?

And then went on some insane type of run. Like, yo, man, why are y'all messing with this man? Oh, my God. He was insane. He was insane. He was insane with his box. Wow. Duke in Kansas.

But just think, man, how many great players if Jay wouldn't have the motorcycle accident? And if... I beat Jay one-on-one. Real talk. And what? Basketball. On the computer.

Jay challenged me. He challenged me. challenged me one-on-one, and I had to beat him. This is a real thing, man. It's crazy. Unfortunately. I had to beat it. I mean, we had to meet.

What a jail are we talking about? I showed up in the Maryland jersey. I took off the Maryland jersey. I'm in the North Carolina jersey. You got to set the stage. What is it? What is really happening? Look at this deep news.

I don't cook you. Look at it. Look at it. Look at this lockdown. Lucky-ass bank shot. Fuck out of there. Who's a bank shot from 12 feet? Get out of here. I'm mad and Jay even sweating. You got to sweat against me.

I'm up 6'4, mind. Look at me, I'm up. So I let him get back in the game. What did it start at? No, start at zero zero. I let him get back in the game. Let's just look at foul. That's offensive. Listen, now he's

just going straight to the cuff. He doesn't have confidence in the jumper anymore, right? Because I took that away from him. Right? And the game gets... Because you see how you just on your toes? But look at that D is lockdown. He had a mosaic accident.

I'm exhausted. I'm so tired. I never been to decide my entire life. Because you come up on your toes, that's when they cross off, I'm going to cook you. I'm in front of them, though. And now he's crying about a foul. This is my pain right here. You're not coming into it.

Look at this. And I'm there? And you there? Yeah, I'm going to get you. Give me that ball! Give me that ball! You scream it for him? You're not out of you. If it's a real one-on-one game,

you know, that's just my ball right there. He's doing Jay's monologue. Come on, man. So Jay, you're trying to do some bullshit right now. Look at this push off. Look at this push off. There's some net. Look at this.

Look at the push. Yo, you hacking him. Look at him. When do you get the ball? You know, I'm yelling at them on the side. I'm telling him. He touched the ball Don't get out the fuck out the way

Let me get that board Why do you have on North Carolina Because I was trying to get in his head I showed up in Maryland And then North Carolina Two biggest rivals Look how sweaty he is man Yeah I get mad

I'm not falling for any pump fakes Nothing His shoes are breaking down He wore stockings Like he knew he was going to have A real war out there Do you have What you have on your ankles

My angle braces I'm playing against the NBA player. That was a lucky-ass shot. This is where he gets a little too cocky. And one thing I always say is, don't get cocky with me. You know what I mean? Be grateful. Be grateful. Be humble.

You got to be humble. If you get cocky with me, horrible things can happen. So he gets a little cocky. He sees the cameras are out there. And, you know, he gets, he's never playing in front of cameras more. He never played in front of cameras before. And he gets back on the motorcycle. I told him.

I said, don't get back on a bike. Oh, my God. Look at what he tries. to do to me. Disrespect me in front of my family. Look at each other. First of all, I've been locked in. I know every movie's about to do. Throws it off my head and tries to pull up.

Worst thing you ever did in your life. Oh, if he hit that? I knew I was going to miss. I knew I was going to miss. Hold on. I knew I was going to miss. Hold on. I get the board. I get the board, and now I'm setting them up. Now I'm setting them up. Let me slow them down.

Let me slow him down here. Boom! See you. Now look at me looking at them. Right here. Look at that. Look at that. Look at that.

Is the game over? It's game over. Game is seven. The game was the same. What's that one? Of course. Of course. Game over.

That's it. Now, I will say he gave me six points to start. So I just had to score what? Then you got the... I got my trophy. Yeah. Come on. You need a trophy.

Who's that guy? Hey, what's this guy in the back? This is just working out. He just winning is the greatest basketball game if it's the entire life. On the treadmill. His kids are going to ask him. He spotted him six points. So all he had to score was one.

He just had to score one. He had to score seven. Yeah, yeah. But that was his, his rules. It's not mine. I wanted to play a straight-up game. He took it to 6-6 on it. You got cooked, Jay.

You got cooked. He said, I hate that for you. Because I'm telling you, if it's me and I'm playing against somebody, they give me six, we go on to seven. I get the ball first. I'm cooking you. Like, I'm, we're playing. I'm going to take that win. I'm going to take that win all day long.

That's what I said. Hey, take the win. That's what I said. Hey, you, you brought these rules. into it, got nothing to do with me. I didn't ask for that. You almost lost, though.

And I made it interesting. I understand television. I understand entertainment. I don't want people in the game seven. That's it. It had to be that. It had to be that.

I agree. Great comment. I mean and Charlemagne. It's ridiculous, man. It is. So that was the greatest sporting event I've ever witnessed. That was it.

That was my. That was it. Now it's mine. All right, guys, I'm going to be honest with you. For a long time, I was running my health on vibes. Don't do that. I felt off. I just pushed through it. Tired all the time.

That's just life. Something weird going on with my body, probably nothing. I was out here doing full self-diagnosis based on absolutely zero information, like a toddler with a webmd account. And the crazy part is that's most people. Most people have no idea what's actually happening inside their body. They just adjust, compensate, pretend. So here's the thing about summer. It exposes you. You're outside. You're moving. You're at barbecues. Eating stuff. You know you shouldn't staying up late, sweating through everything you own. And whatever your body has been quietly dealing with all year, it shows up. The fatigue hits different in the heat. Recovery takes longer than

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Ontario only. Please play responsibly. If you have questions or concerns about your gambling or someone close to you, please contact connects Ontario at 1-866-531-2,600 to speak to an advisor. Free of charge. BetMGEM operates pursuant to an operating agreement with Eye Gaming Ontario. I thought the Knicks was going to win the championship of 94. Just thinking, I'm the only person in the whole Texas prison that's going for the Knicks. Are they playing the games?

Yeah, but we watch the game on TV. And I am, it's some, it's some, we was doing well. And then we wasn't. And I remember when Houston won and I'm coming into the cafeteria, it's like, I knew something was up. Because the cafeteria is always loud. It's like the cafeteria is quiet. They know what you're going through. No, they're waiting on me.

Like, it's totally quiet. And I come around the corner and as soon as I walk up the cabin, yeah, ah! I'm like, even the people that were to lie with me, they were just oddly quiet. Like, you're like, you always talking. Why are you just so quiet right now? Waiting to get into this captain's day. It was like a celebration. Because they were suffering.

Man, it was crazy. They knew how much shit you were going to talk. Oh, I was talking so reckless. I was talking reckless. But it's saying like that with the Cowboys. In the 90s, I hated the Cowboys. I hated the Cowboys. I still hate the Cowboys.

But when they would win Cowboy fans, it was terrible. But when they would lose, I had so many shenanigans. So satisfying. It's like, yo, and then this is when you know, when you know that you got mad about something,

when you locked up and they rooves of mine, and you tell them I, well, why don't you send Troy Aitman a commissary slip so he can see you some money since you love him so much? You just, you're like, you're something that you know that's not going to happen. But you're just so mad, man. What were the politics with watching sports in prison?

Was there every situation where it's like, okay, these two games are on right now and one group gets to the side which game is watched? And you think that we have cable? It's one game that was ever playing on local TV is what we're watching. Fair enough. And when you were in a block where they have three TVs and different. different parts. They have two TV at each part. So it's three TV, three parts, three TV.

One TV is designated for Hispanics. That's their TV. Telemundo, that's it. Then you have sports and all type of general stuff, but then you have the movie TV, like people who are watching a regular TV. Now, the crazy

thing is Denise Austin would be on all three TVs in the morning. She's, what, like a news reporter or something? No, she's a and she's a rovic instructor. Hilarity. And then we couldn't wait

to Kyle and they came on. It's the only time that you see all the black and watching Kyle and they were in the face. You're like no, no seat. We're going to affirm up the front of your thighs, the outer side, all right. Back to one side, and your inner thighs. You're mad at a bunch of dudes

in the borderline. Not one of them doing aerobics. Not one of us doing aerobics. This is the greatest white woman of all the time in prison. This is the greatest white woman that this is a savior in prison. And this is, this is recent. This is, this, this, this is not really her, her most exotic outfit. It's tame?

Yeah, this is very tame. She's not even all the way tan just yet. You knew Denise's seasons? Yeah, man, this Denise Austin was crazy. Oh, see, okay. Trying to tell you. Okay, yeah, yeah. Trying to see the tan.

Yeah. See that dark pink outfit. Golden locks. Like, you watch the time coming in. I wonder if she knew how popular she was in prison. Goodness, she probably never did, but Denise Austin was on face. Look how he said he's giving flashbacks right now It's insane

It's like if you did I forget I remember we was on lockdown one time And the TV came on And the The CEO came in And change it from Denise Austin And we lost it

Why did he change it? We locked up Just being me Just like Oh wow He just Yo we're trying to the world He put it on like C-SPAN

You know, we want to kill him. This was every morning? Yeah, man. Just because it's on the local channel. Yeah, this channel 8. Wow. Like, PBS, they didn't he saw someone's insane. That's so funny.

But would there ever just be random stuff on the TV? Like, it would be like a high school basketball championship. And you're like, all right, we're watching this now. High school basketballs. I mean, this ain't LeBron Air. They weren't showing no high school. Yeah, you're doing like, you got the news. I imagine there's some sitcoms, though.

You probably watch. Yeah, sitcom. We watch that type. But did you just say how old are you? I'm 29. Oh, no, that's why you think high school was televised. That happened with LeBron. It was never a high school game ever watched on television before.

What about like in Texas a high school football championship game? Not even that? It's not coming on TV. Because that was huge. That's not coming on TV. Wow. Wow. That's, that's, you got to go view that.

You know, we was under that type of regime. You would view things with your naked eye. Unlike people now, you know, we spend a significant amount of money on these shows to do yonder. Oh, because you don't want people on their phone. We want people on their phone. So you do that for every show? Every show that you do on the road, you're yondering. Have you found a difference?

Yeah. Really? People pay attention until you get to, like, um, I think I've had, doing the theaters, the worst thing about it is how people are conditioned to comedy now. You know, they condition to people doing crowd work. Yeah, yeah. They conditioned to having, seeing eight people before you come out. You know, they condition to these things.

Yeah. So they show up. And then you have people who don't know you. coming with somebody else or whatever, so they don't know that you do these long stories with these points. And then they come and they, or they conditioned to people doing their old stuff in front of New Orleans. I would figure your audience by now is conditioned to like what you do.

Nah. Really? It's still, because the audience is still building. A lot of these people haven't seen me live. So they see one story on social media or something. They're like, I got to go check. And it was the craziest thing. This is the other thing that I think people are.

a condition crazy for it's people that have seen me on TikTok there's people that have seen me on Instagram people have seen me on Facebook but they don't know there's a whole special because they're watching clips that is how most media is consumed now

and not watching the whole special which is crazy to me I saw this but you didn't see the whole story so I don't I don't get or somebody a comment in a space and they don't know the whole story. You don't know the whole entire thing.

You just comment on just this right here, which is, I don't know. I guess humans are declining at a rapid rate with their attention span. I think that's possibly, I think it's definitely true. I also think that is like the one, I don't want to say downfall, but like they're the one potential negative to having stuff on the different social media platforms. is you don't know how long they're going to consume of it and you don't know what parts of it they're going to consume. Whereas like when we were younger,

like I remember when Patrice's elephant in the room came out and like we had like a watch party for the shit. Like we just sat down and watched it. Like I remember, you know, even like listening to delirious on cassette. And it was just like this one experience where we just sat down, me and my dad, and we just like listened to this audio cassette. Yeah.

Yeah. So there, so I think now, like maybe there is a version this really surprises me coming from you because I think you have such a specific style I would think that there would be an expectation set up with the audience for that long form story

especially as you're doing the specials like there's going to be a cohesive theme in this like that's shocking to me that they're maybe you're growing at a rate where you have so many new people coming in it's the new people that's probably it your OGs know what you're doing and they have the expectation for it.

I can tell them because this is the people that's on time. There's people know that I don't know. I got one person that's coming out in front of me doing 15 or 20 and then I'm coming to do an hour and a half. I think that

this is something that's kind of like missed a bit. Like when we do the show I think everybody has to decide what that amount of time is. but for me I think that like hour 15 maybe hour 30 I think is like a real nice amount of time but I mean that for the whole show like if you're doing an hour 30 I think it's smart you don't have four guys going there before you because by the time you go up these people let's say they're already drinking or doing something like that they're an hour into the show and then you're

going to do another hour 30 yeah I don't think that's the best experience for the people that came so certain places I do by myself like when I come to New York York, when I'm at the beacon, it's just me. No other person. You know, when I'm in Atlanta, just me. Detroit is like Chicago, just me. It's a certain spot. I'm just doing just me because I want the whole entire time.

Wow. Now, when I have somebody, it's crazy for, let me say, the last three, four shows, right? I witnessed somebody coming in, like I was in Miami. How do you come in and I look at the clock? I just look at the clock. I'm at 57 minutes. How do you come in at the show and I'm at 57 minutes?

But in your mind, you think, oh, it's going to be other people. And then we'll catch him at the end. And somebody came, I'm 45 minutes in and they're in the front. I have the room dark, pitch black, with a spotlight for a reason, not because I want to. I don't want to be distracted by people with all of movement. And I want the room totally still like a play Because I'm not doing

Slapstick form I'm not doing punchline set up punchline set up punchline I'm not that's not what I'm doing So I'm doing I'm taking people on another ride So I have to have The full attention So I lock the phones up But don't I wouldn't like undercut yourself

You do have a lot of punchlines And you do have a lot of jokes It's not Yeah But there are certain people who have I think you're not doing in a traditional, like, here's my setup, misdirect. But you're not one of the guys that doesn't have jokes built in. And I think, yeah, I just don't want you to describe yourself in a way that's maybe not as elite, I think, as you are.

There are guys who are doing long form, and it's kind of like stand-up, but also, like, storytelling. And there's a lower expectation for funny, I think, for that. when I see some people's what they call storytelling, I'll just be sitting there like. And again, it's like I'm not trying to knock anybody, but it's like there is a way to tell stories and also have them be hilarious. Yeah.

I kind of figure that part out. I think so. Have you ever had someone interrupt in a moment of the story that's really important for tension? Like, have you ever been building up specifically? And you're like, I'm about to come into like this really important part and then someone fucks it up. I feel like it happened in the special,

that one lady that called out. Yeah. She was being disroth... What was that? Mondays, right? She was being disruptive before I even got to it. So I...

It had nothing to do with what I was doing. She was drunk and got into it with her husband outside. So in this, why we were taping a special. Come on, dude. I went back and started over from where I was... I was...

And we put that clip out. You didn't see it in the actual special, but we put that clip out because I wanted to keep it. I'm like, yo, keep that part just for content. But I've had the spotlight guy mess up. You got one job, bro. He got one job. I think he was too engulfed in the store.

and forgot and not thinking I'm a move he's thinking like he just like he took his hand off and then and then when I went over here and I stopped him like yo I need you over here for this part I was listening this is your fault

so it's been you know it's been times where or somebody would try to howl out something before I would say it right but you don't know what I'm going to say. You don't know the story. So and I would say

no, that's, and then I know, sometimes I'll stop and just, I don't like doing crime work, but I'm very, very good. I've been good at it from me. I want to, I'm going to do a show what I'm going to show. And I'm going to call it, this is so easy.

It's the easiest thing. It's like if I come out doing crime work, that means I don't want to perform. Right. Like, I have, like, in my mind, I don't want to do it. So I'm like, all right. But you shouldn't do it if you don't want to. No, this is the thing of how easy, this is like when I used to host.

You know, I'm coming out, I know I'm going to say this, but I'm not really getting into no material because I'm setting the room up for somebody else. It's not for me. Right, right. I'm saying? But I can see how these guys are like, man, this crowd where I say, so this is funny that the crowdwork guys, nobody. is blaming anybody for stealing their material because what is the what is the material so y'all together

well you were a guy I know y'all messing around and they're like it all starts the same it's no unique way to to stop it yeah yeah look at this shirt

ain't it what is the so nobody's still this is nobody he's still this is nobody's still I would love to see the dude come back in the room like I asked him what his shirt looked like I hear you. Look at him out there.

Still in Materia asking people what they work at. He did my How'd You Guys Meet thing. I will say that like guys who guys like Patrice is a very different type of, in my opinion, crowdwork because it's not like, hey, what are you guys got going on? It's I'm going to impose my will and my line of thinking on you. and you are a vessel for that, right? So it's like, you might actually be given me friction, right? And that is a useful tool within this design. Like, this is how I feel about the world and I'm putting it on you.

You work at a car dealership? Like, okay, who gives a fuck if you work at the car dealership? You know what I mean? But I think there are different. I think you see a lot of, like, crowdworks slop on the internet and you're just like, what the fuck is going on here? But, like, when I think of, when I think of, like, you know, guys who are like really good and like elite at it.

It's this interesting way of like almost like setting up the audience and like baiting them into something that kind of already exists. D.L is nice at it. Diel was the, DL was the pinnacle of him, Robin Harris, and they would get ridiculed for all they got his crowdwork. Right. So this is another era of comedy. Like, and who else was good at was Joe Toole? Joe Toro was good at crowdwork. But that was the ridicule.

All they had was crowdwork. So they developed a long show. But Diell would take the last 10 minutes of his show, and he would do the whole front row. And just mess with people. And the craziest thing that he would take all these people, go through all these stuff, and then tie the last one to the first.

and you'd be like that's a amazing thing to watch there's levels to shit that's what I'm saying like there's levels of story telling there's levels to all different parts of the craft and I think the most like elite versions you start to like blend all these things together

and when it becomes this like seamless blend you know like for example like impressions like I love like hearing impressions I think it's like if you did an impression right now I'd be like tell me more keep doing it but I don't I don't like consider it like elite stand-up.

You know what I mean? It's just like a sound. What? You don't listen to that it is. What? But. So my, this is my, I'm glad you said it.

But let me say, if you can do the impressions and there's a joke in the impression, or you're creating this, like, this amazing world where there are these, like Greer Barnes is one of my favorite to watch

and he can build these worlds. I'm like, the impression is just, a tool in this fucking magical thing that you just built for these people. That to me I'm like, okay, that's stand up. But if you're on one of these cruise ships or something like that, or you go see these like, you know,

and it's just like, here's what Bill Clinton sounds like, here's what Christopher Walken sounds like, here's what Trump sounds like. It's like, if I hear another fucking Trump impression, it's like. So the impression thing to me, if you're doing the impressions of somebody that I don't know and you can get me engulfed in it, like you say you're doing your uncle. I've never heard your uncle before. And then you do an impression on it. Then later on, I actually see some of your uncle.

I'm like, yo, he had his uncle's spot on. But if you're doing Denzel from Training Day, I hate you. Because like Denzel was in a lot of movies. Why is it just, why is this the only one of you doing this training day? I'm not even upset if you do Denzel on Training Day, but like, what is the joke? It's just you doing Denzel in Training Day or you doing Burning Man. It's like when somebody,

does Jay-Z and they do what's wrong with current Jay-Z? I ain't heard Jay-Z do that I ain't heard him do that laugh, but twice. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But Jay-Z never said nothing else? Yeah. It's like you keeping them in this frame

because that's the only, like, L.L, when the last time in L.L. Licked his lips? It was like, why is that to go? I mean, I watch him on, um, on what's the show on you on? I watched him on C-Side. He never lick his lips on there.

Yeah, yeah. So it's like you It's like you kind of It's like you cheat in the game You're saying it's like there's almost like a shared impression It's everybody doing the same junk Like I see everybody doing an impression of Shane's Trump Yeah

Like Shane Gillis did this Trump impression And it kind of feels like everybody's just doing Their version of his impression And that's one of the downfalls in state stand up that being original and stand up has become non-existent because somebody see this is the thing you can recreate so much quicker because you're seeing things on the internet constantly it's but the desire though the desire to do to see you make it to see you make it at something you get a you get some follows or something you go viral something that doesn't my desire is not to do to recreate what you did in a in my mind you're doing in my desire is not to do in my life and my voice. That's the, man. Ollie, we're going to have a long discussion about this, my friends,

because not everybody's desires to do great art. Some people's desire is just to be successful at a thing. And then they see what's successful and they just repeat what is successful. And that's the crazy, coming from being a, this is how I know that these guys are not students of comedy. Because there was one Carol Burnett, there was one Don Rickles, there was one calling, There was one prior.

There was one Cosby. Nobody was saying, I'm going to do my rendition of Red Fox. I'm doing my own thing. And everybody had their own voice, and they made their voice, they made their bones and their voice. Now when I can sit back and you sound just like this person,

are you doing this person? You're doing exactly what they did. Yeah. You know what I'm saying? That's, that's, that's, And it may be the I'm the old man in the group that don't like, you know, what is

okay, when do you find your voice? When do you find who you are? Takes time. I mean, you probably went through that. Takes time to find it. But the thing is, like, I'm not in a rush. I wasn't in a rush.

I just had, I guess because I started was about to be 29 years for me. Wow. They're doing stand-up. So how I started is different. Even the level of respect is different. There's a thing. that's happened, I think that, and the internet is probably, like, expedited this.

But when I was coming up and stand-up, all the best guys, maybe outside of, like, a few outliers, were old. There were guys in there probably 40s, 50s. Like, these were older, you know, I'm starting in my 20s. So the expectation when I was starting was it takes 10 years to even know your voice. That was a thing like comics would always say. When you ask advice, right, be like, how do I find my voice or whatever it is and your voice essentially is like what is unique about you and what you want to talk about and like why are you different? Yeah.

And I think what's happened with the internet is like not only with comedy with just like fucking seeing people on vacation it just looks like everybody's living this great life and I think you'll hear a lot of comics are like oh I gotta do crowd work to make it's like you don't got to do nothing you could just do what you want to do find your like why are you sad like why are you whining

you see all these comedies one like oh I gotta do crowds You don't got to do that. If you don't want to do that, don't do it. If you do want to do it, then do it. This is last night. I got to go on, I got to go on tour. Like, what is a tour? I think a lot of comics are sad and judging their career based upon things that's not really happening. Ooh, what do you mean by that? Oh, so let's dive into it. And I do this, and I do this subconsciously when I look at somebody doing something. and I was just like, well, let me see actually what it is that's really happening. Not for myself to explain this to somebody who I know that's going to come to me and talk about,

well, I got to go on tour. And then I was like, well, like, who? Like, give me a person. And then they would give, I would look at people. I'm like, well, it's, okay, so let me give you a person. You think this person's on tour because they put up a bunch of dates, okay? Put up a bunch of dates, but you didn't read these dates. You didn't read what these dates were at.

You know what I was saying? So somebody just going on bars. It's all bars that's really just really mics, glorified over mics. And they're doing it a different place. They're just going to do anything. They put it on their schedule. Okay. Then you had these guys who put all these tour dates up.

And then I'm thinking I'm supporting a friend. Let me go see what they're doing. I go to the club that they're doing. And it's not their name. It's somebody else's name. They're opening for their person. But they're opening for their person. But they put that on as their tour dates.

Right. I'm saying? Or somebody have a bunch of one-nighters and they're putting it on as a tour. I get it, man. The fake it until you make it thing, but that's not a tour. Touring is a lot different than what my boy,

he got a, DeLay got a very good understanding of what touring was. DeLay, like, yo, I was, I went out with this person and I sat in that city for three days and I did the comedy club with him. Yeah. Then I went on the road with Ali.

We did four different places in three days I'm exhausted I was like oh so you thought I was staying here no I'm in Chicago then I'm in Cleveland then I'm in Pittsburgh

and we do we have a sound check and we have a run and then we back downstairs at 3 30 to go catch another flight and he's like oh no no this is insane he said I slept for two days

after I was I was like yeah because it's not the same you're trying touring And I'm like, well, how long you've been doing it? And that lady told me six years. I said, what are you rushing for? Like, what's the rush?

You thinking, well, the class of comics that I mean, what's this class of? Like, the feeling is that you see your peers and they're excelling and maybe something is working for them on social media. So, like, you need to do it right in that moment as well. And I think there's a little bit, something is lost now that we had maybe when I definitely had when I was younger. I'm sure you also had it, which is like, this is a marathon of a career. And it's going to take you all.

a long time to achieve your dreams. I mean, I was doing comedy 17 years before I did Madison Square Garden. You know what I mean? Like, 17 years is the only thing. And I still didn't do Madison Square Garden and I've been doing it 29 years. I think you got a garden, man. I think you easily got a garden in you. Oh, how many people are at all?

I mean, a couple different arrangements. You can get 18,000 in there, man. Well, hopefully. All right, guys, let's take a break for a second. According to CNBC, nearly half of hiring managers say a candidate enthusiasm about the job is the most important factor when considering them for a role. Well, if you need to hire for your business, how can you separate the candidates who are really excited about your opportunity from the ones that are just meh. ZipRecruiter is how you're going

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Anyway, the point being is like there's different iterations of it, sure. But like it feels like there's this immense pressure that like especially young comics have to do what is working, not do what they should be doing and what would make them feel. fulfilled comedically. And maybe we didn't have that because there was less opportunities when we were coming up. There was a lot of opportunities. Nah. What's the opportunity that was, that's now that we didn't have then?

The internet. That's it. That's the biggest opportunity. Like, this is the greatest things that were happening. But what you know, most of the greats didn't start on the internet. By, by opportunities, I meant like there was exit. There was a few HBO specials, maybe a year. You had like a handful of comedy central half hours.

That wasn't the goal. For some people. For you it was. For mass majority of comics, that wasn't the goal. The goal was to be great comedians. Because you can make a lot of money before the special. You can make a lot of money. It was people that I saw in comedy clubs that were making.

I'd never seen them on TV. I saw them in the comedy club. The expectation was different that people were actually going to. The club built the market. Like, you know that to get in this club, you had to be funny. So everybody I was going to see was going to be funny. It's not like now to where, now with whoever being marketed. Yes.

The club has no, we're just trying to sell some liquor and some chicken wings. Right. Whatever this person is doing, whatever audience they're bringing in here, I don't care if it's a magician. I don't care with it. But it's like some clubs just. wasn't opening their doors for people that were elite. And these are the clubs that to this day are the best clubs in the country. Yeah, and that's the thing.

They built a community. They have an audience. And there's like Comedy Works in Denver's one, like Salt Lake City Wise guys, like side splitters in Tampa. There's one in that I'm messing up with right now, but like in Wisconsin. What? Comedy on state. Comedy on state. There's one in Alabama, Star Dome or whatever. Do you ever do that one? I've done the Star Dome. Star Dome.

So there were these iconic clubs that the club curated great talent so people could expect to go see it. And then there was the factories that essentially just like, I'm bringing somebody to fill the whole room. And next week, nobody might be in this room. These people aren't coming for the brand of the club. They're just a venue. It's like, and I get it. But then you, like, where I came up in just joking, Comedy Cafe in Houston. to come to just joking,

you had to have it because the host had it. You got to think. Same host every night? No. Over the different years, the host, like you had Arniz, Jay was one of the hosts,

then you had Lester Bills was one of the hosts, then you had Bruce was one, earthquake was one of the, it's like the host set the tone. Like, man, you can't come in here and the host is crazy.

Yeah. And to get on this stage, man, you got to be, you got to have it. And I remember sitting, like, I'm just joking to one of my fondest memory because Rodney is a guy named Rodney Winfield. He's a great comic out of St. Louis wore a sailor's cap. And I'm talking about really, really good comic. And he would sit on the edge of the ball. And when you would come off stage, if he liked you. you, he would say something to you.

You know what I'm saying? Yeah, man. He's on death train, right. Rodney was like, yeah, man. And you got to hear his voice because I'm going to do it. This is my favorite. Like, I don't do a lot of impressions, but this was Rodney. You would get off the stage, and if he liked you, he would say something to you.

You come off stage, and he's like, I didn't ever tell you something. They tell you something. Ah, tonight you are. horrible. And then you would, every night, I remember the night that I got a compliment from him. The night I got a compliment.

I came on stage, he was like, about goddamn time. You, I'm talking about, man, tonight you are amazing. I'm talking about everything you did was perfect. It was stellar. One problem. Got one problem. I was like, what?

I did all that shit. 1974. They get your own goddamn off. Oh, that's a good impression. We're supposed to be scary. They didn't have a nurse in the show with white vote. They'd be passing out, oh, the devil. Niggins are in there eating popcorn.

Get the devil, bitch. Thought the exorcist. But Rodney, his most favorite joke when he was on he was on the movie Talking Dirty at the thought, with Martin and all of them. It's a great movie, black movie. You should see it.

It makes me cry when I think about... It's not Armageddonaldics, man. It's a black Armageddon. When he's about ugly people, he's about ugly people all run the same. You know, you follow ugly person home. I guarantee another ugly person going to have the... But, man, he would just...

he would just rip you every time if he liked you because he wanted you to get better. You know, they don't, you don't get, you don't have that experience in stand-up anymore. But it's comics, your comics out now that are the state that I told them that they was terrible. And I did.

When they was, when they was young, I'm like, yo, man, this is the worst damn thing I ever seen. And then, but I'm trying to get you, if you think that you good at three years, your career not going to be as long as you think it is. Because you think that it's no other place to go. Yeah. It's like I say like, Ali, how many interviews do say,

when did you know you're funny? I said, I'm still trying. Because I'm still trying to get better. I'm still, I'm like, not that I support him all the time, but because he'd be on bullshit sometime. I'm like Floyd Mayweather. He's still going to train. And as a boxer, you start the same way.

It's no, you don't, you don't go in and start the other way. You start jabbing. You do the same one. I'm still shooting this many, you know, Jordan's to, Kobe still working out the same way. Even after having championship, after having rings. Yeah. If you already satisfied with what you are. Yeah, you can't.

You'll never get, you'll never get, somebody told you that you was great at eight years. Wow. There's a, yeah. I think that one of the tricky things now with early success in any endeavor, but definitely in stand-up, is that sometimes the audience can decide who you are before you get to find out who you are. And that was one of the advantages that we definitely have, which is like just do stand-up in obscurity for years. So you'll have a choice whether to find out who you are. And then hopefully by the time the audience finds you, you're kind of solidified in who you are, what you want to do, how you want to push yourself.

And that's harder. That's hard. Like if you're three years in and like the whole world is coming for you and they want to see it, there's probably an expectation built up in you to go, oh, I'm going to deliver them this. And I think, I don't know, at least for me, like one of the things I've always tried to do is like every time I did something, I want to do something different the next time. and it scares me and I think I suck at it initially when I start and I'm like, okay, that's good

at least I'll work hard on this and try to get better instead of trying to like repeat the thing that I just did before. But that's my own little I remember when I was in the clubs I was doing, if I do six shows I'm doing six different shows. That's just insane.

I hate it when they tell me these things. No, that's just the real. Then I would do the specials. I would get ready to start doing the specials and I would have to run it

but I'm already on tour so I'm saying it everywhere and it would just irritate me that I would have to do the same show. Oh really? You got to run it. And I would explain

to people how better I am when I'm not running the same. thing. Just let me think about it. Know that it has to happen. And then when we get ready to shoot a special, then I'll be ready. But you didn't run it. You got to run it. So I didn't run. I ran Domino Effect the first one. I didn't run too. I never ran to. Like at all period. I did it that day. I didn't run three.

I ran four in pieces, but I never ran it altogether. My father, I never ran it. This is the most recent one, the story coming out. My father, I never ran. My two sons, I didn't run. I ran rugged. I didn't run Mondays. And out of all those specials, I only wrote one down.

was the first domino effect. Wow. But isn't there a part of you that like, when you're quote unquote running it, you're finding other jokes in it, you're finding other things in it. Like naturally you talk about a topic with your buddies for a month. You're going to find other angles. You're going to get a deeper understanding how you feel about it. Like don't you find value in running something?

That's when I was doing six different shows because I'm going out and I'm talking from different perspectives of what I've done. You would touch on similar topics at least. They would just be different. And that's where you're starting to organize the thoughts. Organize the thoughts. Got it. Okay. It's not just, I'm going to go up and talk about something I've never talked about before.

You might have hit it from different angles. But upon taping, you're like, this is the fleshed out version after touching these topics for a while. Yeah. But with like with the domino effects, I never had to run it because they couldn't, it was nothing else for me to find it because I was telling the story. Right. You know what I'm saying? So with my father, I mean with my two sons, nobody can help me with it because I'm just telling the story about what's happening with me and my two sons. Not help you with it. You help yourself.

Like, you tell me something for a month. By the end of the month, I know you, you're going to have 20 other jokes about it. That's the thing. I just wanted to tell their story with me. Narrating it. Generally. There's like no additives to it. Right. So rugged, I ran rugged. That's how. I got the other little nuggets in it because like what you're saying. But with my father, my father, which is the recent one

that's getting ready to come out, it is just a count of me and my dad. And if I talked about a part of it with like Marcus mostly or Dave, I would remember something else to add to it like what you're saying. I'm like, oh, he did do this part.

What about the opening, without giving away too much, but like the opening of the special, right? Like the first thing that you said, which I think was really funny. I don't want, I mean, people probably will have seen it now. We can give a little way. It hasn't came out yet. No, meaning when we put this out. Yeah, yeah.

Can I as, all right, so the opening, which is this great thing about like you learned, you became a good man or whatever because of your dad, but not because you did what he did, because you did the opposite of what he did. Is that design, like, are you going into that day going, I'm going to open up on this line. Yes. Because that feels to me like the opening of a special

and a tone set for what they're going to experience. And that's coming off of a conversation about my mom feeling like she was oh, he's a good because I got to get it.

Like, no. What did you say? You're like, I'm responsible because of my mother. But the problem I think, I didn't want to be like him. Like, I thought about it. But the whole entire thing, the funniest thing to me still is, you know, I know Carot.

It's like somebody said it to me in a meet and greet that saw doing when we were permitted. And I laughed. Like, I don't know if they thought that that was going to happen. So I was like, we're taking pictures, taking pictures. And then the dude, and he's called my name. And I'm like, what's up? He said, you know I know I know karate, right? And I laugh, so I laugh for like the next five people.

Like, in they, I'm doing the meat green. I'm still laughing because I'm like, you know, my daddy, no, he didn't know no damn karate. But this is the fact that he was sad, but who's going to challenge him? He's six, three, and he wore boots. He gave one extra piece. And he was like, my dad was, when I think about him, he's nuts man and I hope that this special

helps people kind of whatever their father was or wasn't you know if he was great that you celebrate the greatness of him I'm saying more if he was not so great you celebrate the parts that you did get

from him you know like I say in the special my father I don't say he's a bad father. He just wasn't ideal. He wasn't what I saw on TV. You know, it gave me this ideology of what a father's supposed to be. He was just who he was. And the understanding of that, I'm not going to carry around this baggage of why, why you didn't do this with me or why?

You know, I never, I do things with my kids now that had never happened in my childhood. And I think that's the elevation. and the wealth of information that I'm giving them. I'm giving them a different experience in life than what I had. And as a parent, I think that's what my job is. I've never, in the history of me, been on vacation with my dad or with my parents. The first time I ever went on vacation with my mom, I'm the one taking her with my family. We're going, hey, we're going on this vacation.

because I want to experience this as an adult being out on vacation with my mom. And my mom, and I got mad at my mom because she was, I would be looking for my aunt's there, right? My aunt, and this is another special that I don't want to give too much away because this is another special that I shot. I know you're going to hate this. I know you're going to hate this. You want me tip something like, and I know you're going to hate this, right? So I'm doing this show in Tyson's, in Tyson, Virginia. I can't wait until you paralyze your esophagus in your talk for two years.

And I'm going to call you on FaceTime like you just got back to the fucking banquet hall in prison and the Knicks lost. So we shot four specials in two days. Wow. And the family vacay, family vacay is my favorite. one of the four. Family vacation is insane because it's this story about when I broke my clavicle.

And I'm on vacation. I got all of my family with me. And so in the what happened, I didn't even put this in measure but whatever, my aunt and my sister are on vacation, Jack.

Do you understand what I'm saying? They are vacationing. Like, I'm saying my sister, my sister's a horseback riding. She's doing my aunt. My aunt, they are vacationing. You know what I'm saying? Like, it is.

A lot of margaritas. It is like, folks are kicking it. And I'm like, yo, my mom. Am I, like, in the hotel room watching Lifetime? I'm enraged.

I'm enraged. Like, man, we in Kabul. We had this very nice resort. It's very, very nice. And I spent all this money, and you are in the house watching Lifetime. I am enraged.

I am. I'm enraged. Go up to the room. I'm like, yo, man, what's going on with you? My mom has on an outfit that she bought from the gift shops.

My mom already got dressed up to watch Lifetime. I was like, yo, man, are you crazy right now? It's like, I'm going to come out there. I just, I just, you know, want to finish watching this. Yo, I want to have them people

take this TV out of here. You became your parents. He usually came the parent, though. I'm going to request him to take the TV to 8, man. Take the TV out. I'm going to steal a better for the remote. Something got to happen. You need to enjoy the sun, yo.

Like, what are we doing? And then she came out there and she did something with my son. They ate pizza or something by the beach. But he got saying, like he's been on the beach. He got sand all in his pizza. Like, I like to see my family having a good time. Like, I think that's what I work. worked for.

You know what I'm saying? For them to have, yo man, do whatever. And I don't want to make no decisions. When I'm, like when I, when I go on vacation,

I was on another podcast. The guy asked me about my mental health. Like, how do you maintain, I say vacation? And when I go on vacation, yo, July through the second week of August,

I am off. And you talk about, if you ran into me, you wouldn't even think I was a comedian. That's how off I am. Like, I don't want to talk about comedy. I don't want to, I introduce you, I'll see you, knowing you, and know that you do that I introduce you as my name in order. Hey, how you doing?

I'm Sadiq and I see Ali, how you doing, brother? There wouldn't be no Ali Zee. I was like, I don't even want you to know that I do stand up. Like, get away from me. Like, I don't even want to hear anything about, oh, man, I saw you on this. I'm like, I act like I'm not even that person. Nope. Like, what?

I said, man, a lot of people tell me I look like him and Tori Lake. I get a mystical every once in a while. You don't want that. I'm like, I don't want Tory lady. I don't want to compare me to criminals. I remember this lady talking about, do you see the resembled,

you resemble prince to me? I was like, I don't know. Man, you reach it. What are you drinking, man? Because I want it. You are reaching. Wait, so you're going someplace in July then?

Oh, what? Where are you going? Oh, man. See, you're trying to give up my location. I'm going, we're going three different places. And, man, I am, it's water, water, then

a hot place. Water, water than a hot place. And I am so ready. Can you give a continent? Are you going on? Central South? Backpack. Oh, yeah.

Like, I'm, I'm, I don't want to have anything but a backpack. Like, yo, I want all my pictures. They look at all my pictures. Like, yo, he had on the same. Yeah. All the time. I was watching out. When I went to sleep, like, man, I'm trying to go have me some fun. Do you leave your phone or you bring your phone with you?

For only for information, like, I don't post anything. Like, I be out, man. I don't want to be a part of what's going on. Like, I just want to be a part of vacation. I don't want to make no decisions. I don't want to be on the schedule. Oh, we got to go to lunch at this time. No, y'all go.

I don't want to do that. I want to, because that's not a vacation. It's like if you start scheduling things, hey, man, it's like, I don't want to do none of that. Yeah, that's a job you paid for you. I want to, I want to randomly walk out and hear some guy. and eat something strange. You know, he's like, we got a guana.

I'll try. Like, get on a stick. What's one of the, like, more interesting or weird places you ever want on vacation? I think all the places are pretty known because we got kids. But, you know, the Cabo, the, but I know, you know who's waiting on me, because they know that I'm coming, Turks and Caicos. Turks know that I'm coming. Turks?

Yeah, Turks and Cickego, they know. They know for facts that they're going to see me at their fish fry. And they wait on it. They were like, there you go again. I've been to Turks, man. I'm going to Turks, bro. And I'm going to kick it. It's two different resorts that we stay at.

And I'm going to kick, man. Turks, you know, man, I want somebody to find me in the road and step over me. He's like, yo, there's him right now. But do you adventure, though, or are you trying to, like, jet skis? ski and stuff? I'm just ski before in the States. Just skiing that. I remember one time we was in in, um, what do? Cabo of St. Lucas

was, no, what was we at? Wherever it was at, that, um, they was like, yo, don't, don't go this way, because that's the drug dealer route. Just, just ski this way, right? So, I'm just, we just kidding me and my son. We're doing, we finding puff and fishing on it. And the waves,

something happened. Like, I saw the shift. And I was like Yo, Assan, we got to go. And he's in front of me. And it went from like this to chew. For real. Yo.

And I'm like that. A son holding on like, he's terrified. I'm like, yo, Assan, do you understand? This is, because I can swim. I think that I can get out of anything because I can swim.

Which is insane. It doesn't matter how. how crazy the waves are because I can swim you cannot tell me that I'm going to die because I'm just not. I remember when Jayden was little in Miami and Miami had this crazy

storm called out of nowhere and the waves literally were coming up and tossing my daughter so far up on the beach and she's like four and she's running right back into the water and this is my

hideousy. She's not going nothing's going to happen because I'm out further than her and I'm going to be able to get to it no matter what happened. So she went under on this wave and then the wave came up and I didn't see him. So boom,

I'm in action, boom, go on. And then I can't find her. But the way they threw her to the other end and she's just standing like, no, I'm down here. You don't realize that the ocean it just moves you. Oh man, because I can

swim, you cannot, like when I broke my clavicle, I'm in the water. And my mind is, this was crazy, I thought my neck was broke. And I was like, because I heard all this cracking. I said, but in my mind, I can swim. You know, all those people who have drowned also could swim. They think they can swim. They thought. They thought.

And they don't know. They're like, yo, you're not as a. fishing as you think you are. You're trying to, you're trying to, um, um, you're trying to, um, what is it called? Crawl stroke. But, but, and it's a, it's a, it's a, it's a, it's a, it's a, it's a, it's a, it's a, breaststroke frog kick. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I'm trying to, like, what you got going on? Oh, is that? Breast stroke. You got breaststroke frog kid. You know what I mean?

You got to hear of give your chin, bach, and then. Yeah, you got a good point. If you drown, then you might not know what you're doing. You're talking like you just learned how to swim. What a life is. My daughter's a heartache. My daughter was a hurricane. Who cares?

It's a breaststroke frog. But the thing is, why would I think I was going to drown? I have been swimming since I was five. Yeah. And my mom didn't even know. It's the story and the thing, well, I got pushing the pool. And it's not like I could swim at that time because I'd never had taken swimming less than that. I got pushing the pool.

And because my mother told me that I shouldn't have been on that side of the pool. Yeah. When I got pushed in, she was coming down the steps. And I was so scared of my mama that I just swam across. Like, I just got out of the water. And my mama got down there and said, like, you better. got out there poop I got down here. I was like, because I shouldn't have been over there.

So that's how you learned how to swim. But me and I'm like, no, I'm a fish it with in the water. I would love to see Noah walking around the village telling everybody like, yo, listen, the flood is coming. Like, Ali, we got to build this ship. And you just look and Noah like, I can swim. What's a flood? You're the boat for what?

I'm a boat. I'm a canoe. You're more scared of your mom than of dying. That's hilarious. For sure. For sure. But being a, when you can swim, it's just a certain confident when you're around water

that other people don't have. I know how I broke my clavicle because they, and this thing, this thing is. It's a sign that says don't go in the water because it's shopping. And I looked at that sign. And my mother looked at me and said, that means you.

And I'm like, no, it doesn't. I can swim. And I'm literally out there And I remember the first two days That I was walking around And people were pointing me like That's him right there He'd be out there to walk

I can swim How'd you break the clubbuckle? Oh man This this This wave bro Yeah it's not the water It wasn't a wave

Because he can handle the water It's the wave No, waves are so different. The wave was in, like I'm literally, I'm coming, right? And I just came in. And this is how big this wave was. That my son said, Dad, look at that wave. And this is how I looked up.

I was like, oh. And it came down, and it slammed me and drug me along the beach. And that's how I broke my clavicle. Like, it was bad. And I'm, I'm, I'm. I hate to say this to people, but my family, no, I'm a little tougher than a lot of people. My ribs are broken. My clavicle is broken.

My sternum is bruised. Like, I'm really, but I don't want to leave because they're on vacation. And so I'm just toughening it. I'm just toughening it out. And I'm sleeping literally up against the wall in the room. Because I'm like, something is wrong. And I was saying that, I was like, yo, they put me in a sling. They put my arm in the same.

I was like, and the life goes like, oh, this is ever, it's happening to me all the time. I used to be a bull rider. I'm like, nah, this is a little different. I can tell this this is different. I don't know what a bull riding is, but I know this is, something is bad, bro. So I'm in a sling, right?

But I just know that it's something else. And I'm, I'm like, I would scoot up against the wall and I'm like, sleep like this. And I would wake up and it would be, it would be really bad. hard to breathe. So I get on a plane, I come back.

And I'm waiting for the MRI and all the rest of this. So I get the MRI and back in my day, they would just get your x-rays and you would never really see them. They just come tell you what's wrong with you. Now they blow you up on the screen. And it's like that lady find great pride. Tell you why you fuck up.

She had a pointing thing. So you see the second thing? You see this right there? Yeah. That's your clavicle. And that's supposed to be here. It's totally, it's gone. And the tendon is gone.

All that's gone. And I was like, so what's that? It's the black crack. Oh, those are, I'm going to get to that. Those are your ribs. Those are like four breaks in your ribs. Like, yo, it's crazy. And I said, so what are you telling me about what we're going to do?

So the clavicle, I said, what are we going to do for my ribs? And she said, nothing. I said, man, that is not a medical term. because, you know, they can't really do nothing. You got to let them heal on your own. So after that, I'm waiting on the surgery. I go back on the road. I'm still flying and doing shows.

There's some people in Utah that probably think I got shot in the airport. Because I'm getting my bags, right? I'm getting my bag. And I'm rolling on, I'm waiting on the car. And as I'm walking, I'm like, no, no, no, no. I got a sneeze. Oh, no. And so I sneeze.

and then I just lay down in the baggage claim. I just laid on it out. And white people are crazy. White people are like, who you got shot? It was, so I had the surgery on a Tuesday and then because I want to keep my word to this comedy club who's closed now. They're trying to stop them from being closed.

So they didn't sold out two shows. shows when I'm coming out and people like, yo, he's never been in this club. He never said he was coming. And so I finally, they made a deal and I came. So I'm wanting to keep my word. I get on the plane the day after I have surgery. So I'm on the plane. I get there.

So I come out, I got this huge, it's not the slain they gave me in Mexico. This is a huge thing with a ball on it. It's pressure for the moment. It's crazy. So as I'm, I'm done. doing the shows, and then the last show, this lady, I collapsed in the comedy club. I'm walking. And this lady said, great show.

And I just went down. And this is after me telling the whole story about what happened. And this lady hit me right on it. I just collapsed to the floor. And I was like, yo, this is insane. And my ribs were still broke. And I was like, and then when I look back on it, on that whole ordeal.

I'm like, why? Was I that dedicated to stand up? Like, why? Like, is it, is it? I must be crazy. And then now I look at my two sons. My two sons and rugged. I had on some red Gucci loafers

that I had on these cowhide boots. Nobody would believe that my toe was broke. My baby toe was broken. and why I'm doing these specials. Yeah. And no one would even think it. It was like, yo, because I'm not hobbling or nothing. I didn't tell the director nobody until after it was over,

and I took my boot off and my foot is slow. It was like, but I had all this numbing spray. They would be walking in. They didn't know I was spraying my foot. They thought I probably had athletes' foot. I was spraying all this numb and stuff with my foot. And I'm like, yeah, y'all ready? And then now I've got a struggle to put this boot on.

And I was like, so when I went out there, when I went out there, I would just be doing, doing my thing, just blocking it out. Damn. And I think my father wasn't nothing wrong with me on that one.

And not even emotionally. We got to make sure, we got to make sure everybody goes and checks out my father, obviously. But before you go, I wanted to ask you if you saw the roast and what you think about it. Like you had brought up Rickles and you had brought up these guys who like, I think a lot of us watch them with like these iconic roasters. What did you think about the last one?

I know there's been like a lot of controversy and stuff. Like what was your digestion of it? This is my take on it. One, I did not see it. But here's my opinion. I did not watch the roast. Okay, but my opinion on the controversy that I heard, it's going to always be like that going forward if you're being roasted for industry event versus a actual roast. Which is like your friends.

Which is your friends. The Friars Club was a roaster was friends. And when you watch the classic roast, all these people had personal relationship with those. they was friends. That is an industry thing now. That's not an actual, the basis of a roast. So whatever controversy is coming from due to the, I'm not going to say the elevation, the decline of it being a personal thing versus it's being an industry showcase. But this didn't exist with the Tom Brady one. At least I didn't feel this much when I did it. When I watched you all doing the Tom Brady jump, it was, it was, it was.

wasn't racially charged. Well, because Tom is white. Tom is white. And I hated him for that reason. And I hated him because he played for the Patriots. And I didn't think that it was, it had this type of, you know, stigma around. It's like certain people were saying certain things. It was very sexual.

Tom Brady. Yeah, Tom. That was very, very serious. It was like some things. In my mind, at some point, I was like, yo, it would have been some fights behind. Like, if somebody would say some of the things that would say, I was like, yeah, because my whole thing was like,

yeah, I'm going to see you after this. Yeah, you're on the list. I would not be doing a roast each of us. Yeah, I would be more inclined to be roasted by people who, I know. And then the people own the thing that I actually know. It was saying...

Because then you, then there's never any concern about like... Malice. Exactly. If you're saying something, you're saying something, I don't think that you have any malice towards me. So I'm taking it all in fun. It was like, if I'm roasting you, I'm going to bring up superstition. You know that you're superstitious.

So it's not going to be like, I can't believe he said that about me. Or if we've been on the road for 12. 20 years together. It's like seeing some guys in the army that are making like fucking horrible jokes about one another. It's like, yeah, but they've been in the trenches together. They don't even care what race each other are. These people have literally

put their fucking lives on the life. Do you understand if we in war and you didn't have to drink each other's urine by you coffee. You would call me crack. You got me, whatever you want to call me.

What's that with the pride of apples? This is a different thing. This Hawaiian guys Pete takes crazy. You know, because it's like you, man, you're in a different mindset. This is things that people had to do for each other during times of war. When I go back, I like war movies. Now, if you want me to get choked up, it was in. Now, I'll be watching the film.

I'm like, yo, I can't believe they did that. He was like, he carried him. He's carried him. He blew his legs out. You're saying, and again, like, you haven't watched it, but you think the response comes from, like, maybe a lack of camaraderie or, like, a built-in relationship. Yeah.

Where if it was that, you don't think it would be... I don't think that it would have been that at all. So it's not necessarily about the jokes. It's about, like, where they're coming from. But they come from. And that's what the audience was consuming it. Yeah. So it's like Eminem and Dr. Dre are saying crazy shit to one another.

You're like, yeah, these guys have known each other forever. Or like, there's love there. Yeah. But got it. But strangers, it can always be taken in that way. Even if it's not meant that way, that's how the internet could take it. Yep. If Drake say anything about anybody, it is definitely.

You're right. Yeah, right. I'm like, Drake, you say anything. Anything is the problem. Because you're from Canada. He's from Houston. He's one of yours, man. No, he is.

All right. You got to get out of here. You got more stuff. I love to do. Listen, we love you, brother. You are prolific. Keep up the great work, man. We will continue to say more. All right, Sadiq, everybody, go check out my father, man.