Andrew Schulz's Flagrant with Akaash Singh - Logan Paul Retired Floyd Mayweather

Episode Date: June 8, 2021

Join Andrew Schulz, Akaash Singh, AlexxMedia, Mark Gagnon and Dov on this week's episode of the Flagrant 2 as they discuss: 1:00 - Logan Paul’s self belief annoys people 16:40 - Floyd Got Rocked by a YouTuber 21:00 - Chad ochocinco didn’t look bad 24:00 - Stream shutdown 44:30 - Knicks, Nets, NBA 50:00 They're sacrificing fauci 1:14:00 - Indian Wedding story 1:23:30 - Friends gotta be at weddings 1:37:00 - Do you bring kids to the wedding? 2:01:00 - Andrew and Alexx’s first class plane story 2:25:00 - Drake Bell talking to kids 2:29:40 - Elon and Anon 2:39:00 - Katt Williams Cancel Culture

All right, yo, what's up everybody? Welcome to Flavor 2. It's your boy, Shultz. T. Akash Singh. Alex Media. We're not even calling you Alex Media anymore. No, no. What are we calling you?

We're just a kid from Rockaway, dog. We're out here with just a kid from Rockaway. Far Rock. Far Rock. Get it right. Oh, okay. My bad. I'm just reading what the shirt says.

Yeah, it says Far Rock. Learn how to read. Oh, it says Far Rock? Yeah. Let me see. Let me see. Just a kid from Far Rock. Oh, I can't see because your coffee thing is out there. Okay, my bad.

Far Rock way. Totally changes things. And Mark Agnon. We got the truffle. We even got Vala in the building. And listen, we got a lot of things to talk about. Let's get right the fuck into it. lot of things to talk about let's get right the fuck into it um people that believe in themselves people that believe in themselves piss people off

they do piss people off because they expose our lack of belief in ourselves that's a bar but they force us to deal with that. That's a bar. And it is true. You see people who go, I can do this, I can do whatever. And this Logan Paul situation, I can see why his self-belief rubs people the wrong way. But when you see somebody do the thing that they more or less said

that they were going to do, right? It is wildly impressive, and it forces you to go, oh shit, maybe anything is possible. Now, I'm not going to be delusional here, okay? He did not win that fight. If there were judges, he would have lost that fight on the cards. Very easily.

Every round. No, no, I think he won. The first round, I think he won. He had that big flurry where he didn't really touch Floyd, but Floyd didn't really touch him. So I'll give him the first round, maybe the second round. Debatable. Maybe. After that, Floyd mopped him.

He did land a big overhand right on Floyd that I think actually stunned Floyd. Really? Yeah, he did. I forget which round it was in, but he actually landed. it was him but it actually he actually landed but um what was amazing about this fight was is the stakes were changed where floyd had to stop him for floyd to win right and logan had to survive right for him to win right right that's it wasn't written down right that these were the rules but those are the rules emotionally and we were all going into it we were just like listen i swear to god i've probably even said it

yo floyd is gonna take him into deep water and they're gonna take him down i mean everybody i messaged you know i was i'm literally a dm style bender uh yesterday before the fight i was like what do you think is really gonna happen he goes floyd's gonna tire him out and then he'll just probably tko and they'll stop the fight late in the fight. I thought that was going to happen, and it didn't happen. And Floyd tried, and I know a lot of people are like, oh, he was holding him, blah, blah, blah, this, that, the other. A lot of people tried holding Floyd. They weren't 200 pounds, but now you're bringing up 200 pounds.

I was absolutely astonished when I saw Twitter start capping. Everybody on Twitter was talking about, I mean, you even saw Desus and Mero who said that Floyd was going to catch a body tonight, switch and be like, well, that's kind of Floyd's fight. They did a fucking phenomenal job, though. They were great. I agree. Shouts to Desus and Mero. But initially, there was, yo, Floyd's catching a body.

He's going to take him down. It's over. And then that turned into, listen, that's what Floyd does. The guy's much bigger. And everybody starts making these excuses for Floyd. Charlamagne is sending out group texts after saying Floyd was going to get him out of here on the podcast. I'm almost 100% certain. Goes, yo, that's what Floyd does.

I mean, he was going to win a decision. Ain't nobody pay for a decision. Yeah. People were paying money to see a Paul brother get knocked out. I think people were so annoyed with Jake. They were willing to pay to see Logan get knocked out. Right, right. And it didn't happen.

Yeah. And that is a win for Logan. Yeah. And you're capping if you say otherwise. I admit, I'm 100% wrong. I thought Logan was going down. I thought Logan was going down in the fifth or sixth round. Yeah.

And I thought they were just going to stop the fight. The distance was too much for Floyd to cover. Yeah. He wasn't fast enough to cover. Maybe when he was younger, Floyd, he would beyd to cover yeah he wasn't fast enough to cover maybe young when he was younger floyd he would be able to but he wasn't and he wasn't willing to take the risk in order to land those punches right i thought floyd fought very conservatively yeah he walked down there with his hands up and he was trying to like mix it up on the inside but he wasn't really trying to counter that much yeah you know it was, it was very impressive. Hats off to fucking Logan.

Now, was that Floyd playing it safe because he's like, I'm just here to get paid? I think Logan was right. Floyd had the most to lose. Yeah. Yeah,

of course. Of course, yeah. And the guy's 200 pounds. I think what happened was in the first round, Floyd was like, oh God,

the guy's kind of fast. Okay. And at 200 pounds you hit hard yeah it just is what it is right and and he was like okay so i gotta kind of be cautious with this guy i don't want to get caught and then look absolutely stupid out here and then floyd charged to bully him he just he basically let the let him punch himself out the first couple rounds right that's the strategy same thing happened with uh mcgregor right right let mcgregor be super active in the first few rounds once mcgregor is tired he won't have the same sting on his punches and then you just start walking him down body shots upstairs

and floyd was trying to get him out of there right floyd was annoyed i haven't seen floyd annoyed in a fight since he fought victor ortiz when victor ortiz was headbutting him right and remember he hit him with that check hook when the uh ref separated him and then just finished him but that's the last time i've seen floyd as up floyd was like stop holding he was upset floyd wanted to get logan out of there right he was not content with just letting the fight go and then go to the distance he wanted to get him out of it and he couldn't right he couldn't get him out of there no matter how hard he tried right he couldn't get him out of there and somehow the fight shifted to floyd has to stop him or else he loses.

That's not the case. Floyd won the fight, but he lost it. And hats off to Logan, bro. If you score, I mean, the rules when you played Jason Williams were actually if you score one point, you win. Exactly. That's it. But even if I played Brian Scalabrini and it was 11-1, I won. You won. Exactly. But how you let me score a point, dog?

Come on. You decide these rules. Somehow the rules that Floyd decided actually helped Logan. In which way? Which rules? Because there's no decision on the fight, no judges. Oh, okay. And actually the bigger gloves.

Yeah. If there were smaller gloves, maybe those shots that Floyd is landing, they sting a little bit more. Yeah. Right? Yeah. If there were smaller gloves, those shots that floyd is landing they sting a little bit more yeah right yeah if there were smaller gloves yeah you never know if there were judges and they all just said 80 floyd or 71 logan yeah now logan can't go out and say i beat him right logan is literally going

i won jake paul's going i won all the casual fight fans have no clue what the fuck happened all they saw is that their guy went eight rounds with the greatest to ever do it and didn't really look that beat up. Yeah. And it wasn't super, super conclusive. I mean, it's not like, I mean, he was bullying him. He was landing shots and Logan wasn't landing anything the last six rounds except that one big bomb. But it wasn't so abusive that you're like, oh, wow, he got destroyed. Right.

The average casual could go, I guess Logan won. Yeah. Nah. The casual? Nah. All right, maybe not. Yeah. But you're playing with narratives now.

You know, now he could just go, the victory was going eight rounds. Before, he's like, I'm going to finish him. And now he's like, I went eight rounds with the greatest of all time. Yeah. So it's just, it's really impressive. Yeah. It's really impressive. Because now the decision's kind of up to the court of public opinion yes and logan is better at manipulating the court of public opinion than floyd 100 100 but it was amazing to see all the cap on twitter he's a heavyweight you know weight divisions matter which is what logan was saying the whole

fucking time and now you got all the floyd stands like myself trying to make little caveats for why floyd fought like that yeah floyd was there to make little caveats for why Floyd fought like that. Floyd was there to finish him, and he couldn't finish him, and that is credit to Logan. Enough said. I disagree. Go. I don't think anybody thought Floyd was going to drop him. Floyd never has knocked out

punch a power. That's what I was thinking. I thought he was going to pick him apart more. I thought the number differences were going to be bigger. He did outpunch him two to one, but the, the number differences were going to be bigger. Yeah. You know, like he did out punch him two to one, but still,

I thought it was going to be like four to one or something like that. It's supposed to be five to one. But you got to give him some credit. Like Logan was holding him every time he tried to get, he tried to mix up with him. Sure. So it's like, it's frustrating.

And when you do have that much strength over him, he can't break out the hold as easily as he used to be able to. So it's like, I don't discredit Floyd. He was trying to fight. I give it up to him that, yo, you were going at him, a bigger, stronger guy. You could have gotten knocked out,

but he was attacking. This is the Twitter cat. It's not cat. We're talking about the greatest of all time, the greatest to ever box in the history of boxing. According to Andrew, the greatest to ever do anything. Like, nobody's better at their thing than Floyd is at boxing. And he couldn't find a way where Logan could hold him?

But in a specific weight class, though. Like, if he fought Mike Tyson. That's what I'm saying. If Floyd fought Mike Tyson, Mike Tyson would win, right? Well, Mike Tyson's a professional boxer. Right. Logan Paul started boxing three years ago. If you've been boxing for 25 years, you should be able be able to find a way you're the greatest boxer in history

not only because of your physical attributes because your mental attributes you were finding a way to get out of any situation you've ever been put in he couldn't do it father time is undefeated he was too slow he couldn't close the distance and he he he was forced to just straight up walk him down with his gloves up because he couldn't counter him. He was too slow to counter him. There was too much distance. Right.

Right? So he's like, I got to just walk straight in. When he walked straight in, that's when he was susceptible to being held. Right. He couldn't do it. I don't think he couldn't counter him because of speed. He couldn't counter him because of just the distance. Well, distance and speed. Right? There was too much distance to cover with the lack of speed that he has he couldn't counter him because of speed. He couldn't counter him because of just the distance. Well, distance and speed.

Right? There was too much distance to cover with the lack of speed that he has. He was countering some of them. He was landing most of his shots. He would open with a hook. Yeah. And that wasn't off of a counter. What he was trying to do is hit Logan with this pull two. So Logan would throw his shot and then he would pull back and then shoot

a right hand before Logan could throw throw his his right hand yeah and that barely landed it didn't land that much but i'm just saying i think it didn't land because of the distancing like he had to get super close just to be able to do that counter because he's usually like falling back when he throws it yeah so it's like it's hard for yeah yeah 10 years ago floyd lands whatever he wants floyd lands whatever he wants i'm telling you bro i'm telling you he is slower now but that's to logan's credit it was really brilliant what they did you gotta give credit i'm taking your word nobody want to give credit to this guy i'm taking your credit for not getting tko'd i'll give you that's all i'm saying like i never thought he was going to get one punch knockout.

I don't give him a win, though. Son, Floyd was in there with McGregor, okay? McGregor got his ass kicked way more, way more than Logan Paul. Way more. And I would say the difference is height and weight. Logan Paul started boxing three years ago. Yes, but if a guy 50 pounds heavier than you grabs you, I don't care how

good of a boxer you are, you can't break out of that. All I'm saying is this is now the discussion. Like, everybody's making Logan's argument when everybody was throwing that shit away before yesterday. Before yesterday, Logan was like, there are weight divisions in boxing for a reason, and I'm going to show you why. And everybody's like, shut up, you're going to get your ass chopped down.

I'm talking about like professional. Everybody asks the same thing. Well, that's what I would ask you. You'd be like, and I think we said if he lands one, maybe Al said it. If he lands one, he could hurt him. And you were like, oh, you're talking about a one in a million chance that he lands one. Yeah. I went on stage right when the fight started, then flew here. So I'm taking your word for it.

But I don't, I'm not super shocked by that outcome. And to your point about connor connor didn't box three years straight i know connor boxes well but he's an mma guy could you say logan paul just box for three years straight in that way aside from being bigger and more reach and more weight no he is a better boxer than connor just skill and dedication no because you're boxing as part of your preparation for your fight so he'd been doing that since he was a kid connor right logan hasn't we're talking about three years of boxing experience all i'm trying to say is the conversation has shifted and logan

shifted the conversation yes the conversation before was he's going to walk him down i ask any professional ask anybody in the industry ask anybody at all same same perspective it was floyd's going gonna walk him down and then in the later rounds he's just gonna start piecing him up same way he did to connor get the tko right couldn't do it and now everybody's like it's because of the weight differential and that's what logan said the whole time and everybody was like man get the fuck out of here you don't got a chance i said it to his face on a podcast i go you don't got a fucking chance yeah and he didn't win but he didn't get TKO. People say that shit to his face. Yeah.

And I'm sure that is motivating. Yeah. And what I found just is like the self-belief thing. I remember before the fight, he tweeted something like, every day when I moved to LA, every morning and every night, I would look in the mirror and say, you're going to be the most famous person in the world one day. Yeah.

And he's like, and now it's on its way to happening. And you can argue with that. But I was like, yo, that shit works. The people who have that self-belief, not every one of them gets super famous, but I bet you every super famous person does that shit and has that self-belief. So I looked at that as inspiring.

You can hate that if you want to, or you could just emulate it and see where it gets you. That's the GPS. Self-belief is the GPS. If you don't have that shit, you're going nowhere. Right. Now, just because you have it doesn't mean you're going to put in the hard work.

A lot of motherfuckers ain't going to move to Puerto Rico and dedicate three years of their life to doing a fucking, to becoming a boxer, becoming whatever the hell you want to do. But that is the GPS. Right.

You also need to know the address in order to get there and what the things you have to do in order to get there. But it's the foundation. If you do not believe in yourself, you're not going nowhere. simple as that it was just fucking impressive to see man yeah it was just so impressive now floyd put out on instagram like a

month ago he was like yo i'm gonna fight logan paul in an exhibition and if jake paul can get through his opponent then i'll fight jake paul in an exhibition floyd say he's not fighting anymore no at the press conference do you think that like what did this fight change his perspective yeah logan retired floyd again that's what people don't realize like yo it's facts like you can say whatever you want but floyd said in the post fight presser he went from before this fight he goes you know what uh yeah i'll fight jake could get it afterwards we'll fight the both of them matter of fact i'll fight the both of them the same night to afterwards afterwards, I don't think I'm doing any more of these exhibitions anymore. I've made a billion dollars in all my fight purses. Everything's good. We out of here.

Yeah, I think... Sorry to interrupt, but if he takes care of Logan in two rounds, you don't think he's fighting Jake after Tyrant? Yeah. He didn't like the way the sentence was worded, even though logically it's correct. What really the reality is, Floyd realized he's old

probably yeah and so he's like all right i need to retire because this is fucking embarrassing yep but the guy did it you know what i mean the guy hung in there and he made you realize you're old oh if you played a retired nba player and he was like bro i'll kick the shit out of any young kid whatever and then he beat you but he was like yeah i can't play these young kids anymore you you wouldn't be like i'd fucking won dog yeah i'm not fucking yeah but i wouldn't i wouldn't claim i retired him you retired him like that's a wild claim son i know it's crazy to say you have to understand this hurts me that's my favorite athlete ever i love floyd mayweather i'm the biggest floyd mayweather apologist when the whole world was hating on Floyd Mayweather because he was Floyd Money Mayweather and doing

all this flashy shit and beating the shit out of all these fighters that people actually really loved. I love Floyd the whole fucking time. Purest boxer I've ever seen in my entire life. It pains me to see what I saw. It was Jordan on the Wizards. Say what? Jordan on the Wizards. It was Jordan on the Wizards.

He still had a jumper, but he just... It just wasn't there. Yeah. It just wasn't there. And yes, there was a weight differential, but Floyd was so good, it didn't fucking matter. It didn't matter. But why didn't you say that Conor retired Floyd after Floyd beat Conor? Like, why wasn't that when he was like...

Because isn't that when Floyd was like, all right, I'm done. Like, I'm retiring. And then he came out of retirement to fight Logan. Well, then he got his 50-0 with Conor. So I think that's what we all, again, I'm very casual. But I always thought he's going to try to get to 50-0 because nobody's gotten that. And once he got that and won and made $100 million and he actually stopped him and won, he's like, all right, I'm going to retire.

I've accomplished everything I'm going to accomplish. With Logan, he said, I'm 44. It's just good to know I can hang with these young kids. He's not a pro boxer. He's a pro YouTuber. Yeah. And for you to be like, I can't fight anymore.

You realize it's not for me. Never in my life did I think I was going to say Floyd Mayweather barely beat a podcaster. I can't believe I just said that sentence. Floyd Mayweather

lost two rounds to a podcast. How about this? Never did you think he would say? Unbelievable. Yeah, there you go. Unbelievable. Never did I think in my life I would say that Floyd Mayweather got hit with a one-two clean by a podcaster. Floyd Mayweather didn't get hit by a one-two by some of the best boxers in the history of the sport.

He got hit by a one-two by a podcaster, by a YouTuber, by a guy who would go around the world doing splits. That's what he would do. He would do splits around the world. Splits! I didn't know he did that. He'd jump in the air and do fucking splits. And he landed a one-two, literally what George Janko said he was going to do. And we were like george

get the fuck out of here he did it the exact fucking punch that we told george jenko he's a maniac for saying he gonna land a one-two george jenko is in the green room in fucking phoenix and tells us now we got a crazy punch what he's gonna do is he's gonna throw a jab and then throw a right hand afterwards i'm like you say he's going to land a one-two on Floyd Mayweather? And he did! Unbelievable! So, say what y'all want to say, but I can give credit where credit is due. And there's some motherfucking credit due right here. Because before this, we were

all like boxing superior art and boxing this and boxing that. Now everybody's like, weight classes are what matters. And they do matter. But not when you're the greatest of all time and not when you're going up against a kid who just started boxing three years ago yeah charlamagne's post i remember reading was like something like y'all are gonna stop disrespecting the sweet science after this they're not disrespect the fuck out of it yeah they're not you disrespect the fuck out of it the science ain't sweet when you got 50 pounds over that's that's really what we're saying here

right like wax we've been talking a lot on brilliant idiots about like wax says he could science ain't sweet when you got 50 pounds over. That's, that's really what we're saying here, right? Like wax. We've been talking a lot on brilliant idiots about like wax says he could just beat up anybody. He goes, listen, I'm big and I'm fast and I got good footwork. Maybe, maybe, literally maybe like this is the best argument for wax.

Wax is saying I'm just bigger and faster than these guys. So if I'm going to fight them, I'm fucking them up. Like wax be black wax truly believes he could beat up Floyd. Maybe. He might be too heavy. He might be too strong. In a boxing match or a fight?

Boxing match. Okay. He might be able to. Yeah. It might be too much fucking weight. It's crazy. Yeah. To that point, you know who also played pro football

and has great feet work and is athletic and didn't look bad chad ochocinco all right guys we're gonna take a break for a second because it's time to save you some money okay it is time to save you some money now with today's low interest rates it's a great time to refinance your student loans i know you got those student loans because college is so fucking expensive it's breaking a bank. And you can refinance those and save your ass some money. Say goodbye to stressful student loan payments and take charge of your future with Earnest. Earnest offers low-rate student loan refinancing,

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Visit earnest.com slash flagrant for more details. Terms and conditions apply. That's earnest student loan refinancing made by Earnest Operations LLC, NMLS number 1204917, California Financing Law, license number 6054788, 303 2nd Street, Suite 401, North San Francisco, California, 94107. Visit earnest.com slash licenses for a full list of licenses. Chad Ochoacinco is one punch away from everybody going, yo, Chad Johnson, we got to box someone else next.

He should fight Jake Paul. If he didn't get dropped in that fight, the whole internet is going, yo, he actually looked pretty good. Now it's only two months of training. He got to fight Jake Paul next. And then he got hit with that overhand right and dropped and didn't even know what the fuck was going on he thought the fight was over he was trying to congratulate the other motherfucker he got up and he was

like good fight good fight and he was like now you gotta keep going raised his fist like he was on the medal stand at the Olympics so yeah that was uh that was wild that was a wild situation right there but he looked pretty good he looked good dude yeah I mean I mean it was actually a really good fight card when you

consider it the fight that was between jared herd and luis arias was one of the most brutal fights i've ever seen in my time watching boxing it was unbelievable i didn't see unbelievable it was worth every penny of what anybody paid for that pay-per-view. If you can still watch it, go watch it. They sat in a phone booth. It was a boxing term when boxers are close to one another. And they just threw haymakers at each other the entire time. Unbelievable. I got to check this.

Unbelievable. And Jared ended up losing. And it's probably a downhill fight. Maybe he'll fight one or two times more. But I doubt it's going to happen anymore. But it was unbelievable. Great fight card. Well done. Entertaining. anymore. But it was unbelievable. Great fight card. Well done.

Entertaining. Diaz and Mero, great fucking job. Yeah, they were funny. I mean, and the other guy, Custer, the guy who was kind of like emceeing the whole thing from the desk. And then there was a couple other guys that were with Diaz and Mero, and they all had really good chemistry. It was great.

It was fucking great. Why have we been watching elite boxers fight each other? Like, why have we been watching elite boxers fight each other? Like why have we been watching elite boxers fight each other That we can't understand what they're fucking saying We pretend like we care about the sweet science I do just because I've been watching the sport my whole life But reality is boxing is more like soccer America gets into soccer when it's the World Cup

We all front like we know the fucking rules We don't know the rules We're just excited about America. And we are as invested in America as we are in a YouTuber or another famous person, a celebrity, a musician, whoever the fuck they are. The people that we are invested in, let's just see them fight. This is great. You think this trend actually happens? Like if you consider how the night was, you have an undercard that's pro boxers, incredible entertainment, true to the sport.

And then you have something like this. On that note, yes, on that note, and any boxer that's upset about this, shut your mouth. You have the opportunity to be on a fight card that people actually care about. You can have fun and go on your ESPN fight cards that get 30,000 people watching at 8 p.m. on Thursday. Nobody cares about that shit. Or you could fight in front of a million potential people, have a highlight reel knockout, and then have some super celebrity.

If you're a boxer that's upset by these famous people bringing eyeballs to your sport, you are a fucking idiot. You are speaking as if you get punched in the face for a living. And you do. Like, this is the best thing possible for the sport. That guy Luis Arias might get another opportunity to fight somebody and you do. This is the best thing possible for the sport. That guy Luis Arias might get another opportunity to fight somebody

that he would never get if he was fighting on some ESPN card. Do we know any of the numbers yet? No, but I assume it didn't do as well as Jake's for some reason. And we don't know what the refunds are going to look like. Oh, because Showtime was such a nightmare?

Oh, I thought they did that on purpose i thought that was like an east town and down or east uh the mayor of east town thing that wasn't on purpose bro that shows too new for you to just bring up was it okay so the mayor of east town is this hbo show and on the season finale like halfway through the it was right at the start oh right at the start the stream went down. And HBO claims it was maybe like over flooded, blah, blah, blah. But I only know about that show because of all the media and press that it got after the shutdown. So now it goes viral on Twitter. You can't pay for that type of virality.

I mean, that's like tens and millions of dollars worth of PR. Like Elon Musk breaking the window of the unbreakable. Exactly. Right? A live event, though. Yeah, especially in a time where they're competing against DAZN and Triller. Fandio. Yeah, a live event is definitely different.

Don't get me wrong. But I am skeptical because it adds so much excitement to it, right? You get so much virility. Everybody's on Twitter. Everybody's on Instagram. What the fuck is going on? Why isn't Showtime working? Why isn't Showtime working? And now the casual everybody's on instagram what the fuck is going on why isn't showtime working why isn't showtime working and now the casual casual just goes what the fuck is on showtime maybe i should see what's on showtime so that's why i'm

always skeptical it probably didn't happen with this event but i 100 believe that hbo did that shit on purpose yeah 100 and if they did it they fucking should right 100 that's an interesting thing so the chatter in the ufc world did you guys see Francis Ngannou's tweet? Yeah. We need to talk about it. Oh, what is it? This is Ngannou's tweet. It's crazy to think that Logan Paul, 0-1, just made $20 million on a boxing exhibition. What are we doing wrong in caps?

Hmm. And he was in the audience, by the way. Paul Acosta said he's not fighting. Paul Acosta is that guy, the big juice-up guy that Izzy took out. I think he said he's not fighting until they work on fighter pay in the UFC. So it is kind of interesting, the ripple effect of what the Paul brothers are doing. I'm telling you, the Paul brothers are breaking MMA. It's fascinating to watch.

And Jake is the guy that started it. Dana White has got to be like, what the fuck, bro? Technically, it's Logan. Logan, yeah. Logan fucked this guy in KSI. Yeah, yeah. I meant Jake was the one that went at ufc fighters and he started going specifically like why are you getting paid so they're starting this movement

this weekend in miami was the bitcoin conference and he did a panel with like tim dillon and the twins and he's and he was calling uh dana white a bitch at a huge conference for bitcoin and it's just like this is what we're doing these these fighters are paid enough i need to hear the argument from i didn't hear the argument from dana because yes they're taking way more money from these fights right but they have way more overhead right like the ufc has like actual physical facilities that they have to maintain they They are their own promoter. There are way more costs that they have. Their overhead is way higher. The promoting of all these fighters, et cetera.

So I'd like to see what their takeaway is after you calculate in the PR that they're constantly pumping out for all their fighters. They are the promoter for every fighter on the roster. In boxing, that is not the case. The WBC does not promote whoever is fighting for the heavyweight Tyson Fury. Tyson Fury promotes Tyson Fury.

So if that's what you want to do, if you want to do MMA where you're your own promoter, that's fine. I know a lot of those fighters in MMA right now that do not want to do that. I know a lot of those guys just want to be gym rats, hang out there, let Dana White and the UFC build the folklore around them, and then go out and fight.

And they'll take less money because they don't have to do it. I mean, put it this way. If you don't speak English, you're fucked. If you don't speak English, there's no chance that you have of winning over an American audience without a promotional enterprise like the UFC helping you out. So, of course, it's easy. If Khabib didn't have Conor, how much would we give a fuck?

It's a great point. Do any of the UFC fighters, besides like obviously Conor, like get at least a tiny percentage of numbers so you're always at least hedging against? You mean like of a pay-per-view? I think they do. Probably the elite elite yeah but is there a way to give that to across the board to anyone that's on some of the main fights even a percent even just they know look there's ways there's ways i guess what

i'm trying to say is like i need to know the numbers from the ufc side before i i call them these like money-grubbing pigs right because they might just have way more overhead than these, than FanMio or whatever it is, because FanMio doesn't need to promote the fight. It's easy for the Paul brothers who have these, like, robust social media channels to say, hey, you should be paid more. They should be paid more because they're doing the PR. But if you don't have that, who should be paid more? Right?

But still, even in regular boxing, boxing real fights the purse is a lot bigger so it's like i think that i think that goes down i think that goes down because i don't think regular fights are generating the income that they used to i think it's one of those things like it's almost like baseball where it's like this legacy sport and the guys are already making so much yeah and then eventually you're like these tv deals are going to go down because nobody's watching baseball yeah and once those tv deals go down, those huge salaries, they're going to start tanking as well. I think the same thing will start happening with boxing. And let's be serious with boxing.

Most boxers are making absolutely nothing. We're talking about just the cream of the crop. Yeah, your point still stands about overhead. But one of the reasons boxing viewership is down is because UFC is taking it. They're dominating market share. So even if overhead is higher. And why are they dominating market share? Because their PR taking it. They're dominating market share. So even if overhead is higher. And why are they dominating market share? Because their PR is better.

They're selling their fighters better. They got fighters that have 10 losses that we still watch. That doesn't exist in boxing. Think about it. You can be a UFC fighter. This is your job security. You can be a UFC fighter. As long as you're signed to the UFC,

we'll probably watch you. If you're a boxer and you have 10 losses we're asking you to retire we're going hey it's over for you you don't have a shot they're a legacy ufc guy cowboy serrani if he wants can still fight yeah i'll watch it we'll still watch it the guy hasn't won i think in like five years or something like that it's unbelievable so once you're part of there's value to that machine how much of your salary is that worth how much of your salary is it worth you not having to win every single time you go out and still get paid the next time the same amount in boxing you get paid the millions as long as

you're winning the second you you might be down to a tenth of your salary right in the ufc you make the same every single time with potential upset upside. If you're maybe doing a pay-per-view or something like that. All I'm saying is there might be an argument from their side. Would I like them to get more? Yes. I want fighters to make all the fucking money, but I need to know the true numbers for the UFC before I say that they're just raping all the fighters.

Is that fair? Yeah. But one thing that makes you skeptical of rip is they have shareholders. And if you've got shareholders, that's the number one person you're trying to please. So you're going to try to keep profits as high as possible, to keep stock prices as high as possible. So that's where I'm a little skeptical. Also, I was wondering about UFC just now. Is it popular because white-

Well, Amazon don't have profits. What do you mean? Actually, the model now is you don't need profits you don't need a profitable business to keep your your your yeah you really just need the share price to be high and how is the share price high is people are talking about your company and you will believe that it'll grow yeah so in a weird way they don't even need a profit they can take all the money dump it right back in the business as long as wme stock goes up wme owns the ufc everybody's fucking happy right it's Isn't it crazy?

That's valid. What world do we live in right now where your business doesn't need to be profitable? You just got to believe in it long term. Fuck me. Yeah.

What world we live in where you can have a fake currency that people dump tens of thousands of dollars in and still do it after it keeps going down. Yeah.

What world we live in. How do you do buying in more? Yeah. Were you convinced by the Bitcoin? Me and Dana White, you know, visionary. What can I say? You don't sound that thrilled about it. I'm just matter of fact about it.

I'm going to keep doing it every week. What fact are you matter of about? I'm going to keep doing it. That's a fact. Did you put some in this week? Took a week off. Me too. I took a week off me too i took a week off too did you put them in last week no no i took all the weeks off yeah did you hear every week the thesis of the winklevoss twins of where it's gonna go to there's a 500k coin and their rationale is that if it's their rationale is i have a lot of

yeah yeah that's it like why can't we just be honest about what it is? I want to trash Bitcoin every single time I come on this podcast, but I know half a million people listen, and I don't want them to sell because then my shit goes down. I'm too far committed to trash it. You know what I mean? It's like Bitcoin is, yeah, I'm, what is it? Pot committed with the poker?

You're pot committed. I'm pot committed. I want to trash it. I was able to trash NFTs because I didn't have any NFTs. And NFTs, the price of NFTs is down 90%. Yep. 90% like we fucking said. I can't believe this baboon over here, Dove, trying to get me into NFTs every single fucking week.

We're still doing it. It's fake. We're not doing it. What's fake? It's stupid. You're stupid. You're stupid. Hey, Dove. Can I tell you something about NFTs? You just won't do them because they're cheap. Can're stupid. You're stupid. I know.

Can I tell you something about NFTs? You just won't do them because they're cheap. Can I tell you something? I got a hunch. You got a hunch. I got a hunch. Now I definitely don't believe in it now. Everyone write on the comment wall

if we should NFT the Jameson bottle of- You can't NFT a physical thing. Well, that's what people are doing. They're NFTing the actual episode and then you get something physical. You can NFT it. It's a virtual thing. No, but you can also include a real thing in it.

Listeners, right now, I want to tell you something. I mean this sincerely. Anything I say about Bitcoin, if it's positive, is a lie. Okay? If I say a single thing about Bitcoin that's positive, it is an absolute lie. I would never recommend you putting your money in this absolute bullshit, but I'm too committed to it right now. No, no, no.

I mean this sincerely. If I say something negative, I meant that shit from my core, but if I ever say anything positive about specifically Bitcoin or Ethereum, specifically Bitcoin or Ethereum, if I say a single thing that's positive about either of those things, bat, I only got $90 in, so bat to the moon. But the other ones, I mean this and say I'm lying to you because I am too committed to that stock or crypto or whatever the fuck it is, that bullshit, to lose all that money. The second Bitcoin goes up to the point where I don't lose any money and I sell it all, I'm going to tell you how I really feel.

I'm going to tell you. And Winklevoss, if you really believe in it so much, buy my shit for what I pay for it. Buy my shit for what I pay for it, yo. Buy my shit for what I pay for it, and I'll be out the game right now. I'll just talk all that shit every single week. Every single week, I'll come here trashing crypto, fucking idiots. Come rock it. Come rock it.

Do you know that one? Yeah, I heard of it, but it's not on Coinbase. I don't fuck with it. You got to be on Binance. I'm not fucking with this big shit. Neither am I. akash say your bullshit guys keep putting money in we're gonna be all right to the moon to the moon wait what was that last one you guys said though come rock it no no the one you said you have 90 dollars that was that it doesn't what do you mean what is it that's all the same they're all fake it's nothing it's nonsense so why do you choose to get into that one because i was getting into it and i got hustled he got

hustled by some guy it's just whoever hustles you first i actually hustle myself on this one i was i was looking into crypto and i'm like all right let me try to like learn about this i need one that's actually substantial like one that i can feel like i'm doing something that could help it. That is tied to this search engine called, what is it? Brave? Yeah, Brave. So that is tied to this search engine called Brave. Brave was made by the people who made Chrome or some shit like that. It's a search engine that doesn't have ads.

Essentially, what is that? It's like a search engine where they can't track your data or whatever like track what you're searching like fishing encrypted or whatever yeah so uh and they you get paid for using the search engine so specific ads pop up that i guess are for you and if you feed that search engine with any content you can make money on those ads and i'm like okay well we make a lot of content we can can put it on the Brave browser, whatever it is. And then I can make money off of our content being on Brave. Or I can make money off people viewing our content on Brave instead of on Google Chrome or these other ones.

I'm like, okay, this is actually something substantial. And you get paid in back. So I'm like, oh, this is something substantial. And then I'm like, do I really want to type in fucking brave every time I want to Google some shit? Like, it's just too much. And I was like, I'm not going to do this shit. But this is me trying to actually find something real and substantial that's associated with crypto. Ethereum.

Ethereum is just a it's also a ledger. It's a contract that goes on forever. I mean, you see these words they use that mean nothing. Yo, do you have a hickey, son? Yo, turn that way. Show him that side. No, do you have a side? You know what's up? I don't let that happen. This motherfucker got a hickey son turn that way show him that side no he have a side you know what's up i don't let that happen his mother got a hickey that's a you see that grow up yo yeah you gotta grow up son you can't be having that was wasabi that did that last night all i'm trying to say it's all bullshit dude it's all fucking bullshit the whole thing is bullshit i can't

believe we're all falling for it it It's unbelievable. It's unbelievable. It's unbelievable. But with that said, to the moon, guys. To the moon, what? Tump and dump. To the point where I get my money back. If the shit went up to where I get my money back tomorrow, I'd probably keep it in because I'd be like, he's going farther.

But real talk, I wish I wasn't in. I do wish I wasn't in. Damn. I do. Because there's no way that they I wasn't in. Damn. I do. Because there's no way that they're going to let it get to the point. There's no way they're going to let it be worth a million dollars without it being centralized. And the second it becomes centralized, as long as it's still making money, all these people are like, it's decentralized. And that's what's so powerful about it.

The second it's worth a million dollars and centralized, they're going to be like, well, it's worth a million dollars. They're going to move the goalposts as long as it fits them it be honest it has nothing to do with it being decentralized for you take away power from the fed you were teasing me about the fed now you all the fed is bad i'm i'm on crypto before y'all look at that shit really myth motherfucker was teasing me about the fed and now he's all out here like i guess at the end of the day this investment is your fault what do you? You lost yourself money on crypto by being so anti-Fed. God damn, dog. Come on.

You can't trust your own hunches. I was anti-you making money, not anti-Fed. I believe in the Fed. I believe in institutions of power. And I believe they will blow shit up to maintain that power. That's what I believe. So I cannot wait. If America right now said, we own Bitcoin, we run that shit, it is centralized, I'll

put all my money in Bitcoin. So you were crypto before I was crypto. You know what they said? El Salvador said, we accept Bitcoin. I was like, this shit is done. It's over. That's the best country y'all could get? The best country y'all could get to accept Bitcoin is El Salvador.

It's barely a country. Trailblazers. Oh my God. Trailblazers. That's the caravan. That's the caravan. That's great. These people are leaving that country. Trailblazers. Oh, my God. Trailblazers. That's the caravan. That's the caravan. These people are leaving that country in a caravan. And you know what a caravan does?

It transports. It takes people. Build a wall. We taking people. Build a wall. Build a wall. Build a blockchain. Build a wall.

Okay? Build a wall out of whatever the fuck you want. But unbelievable, the best country they could get was fucking El Salvador. How much they had to pay that motherfucker? How much you think they had to pay the president of El Salvador to lie on that stage right there? $28 maybe? They gave him what? 100 Bitcoin? Let's be

honest. A million dollars and he's like, our country accepts Bitcoin. For what, motherfucker? Your country don't even have ceilings. You can't even. You don't have ceilings. Bitcoin! 35,000 has been the ceiling for the last few weeks. All I'm trying to say is, you can say your country accepts Bitcoin. Y'all don't have Wi-Fi. Bitcoin. 35,000 has been the ceiling for the last few weeks. All I'm trying to say is you can say your country accepts Bitcoin.

Y'all don't got no Bitcoin. You don't have any Wi-Fi. You don't have any internet connection. Motherfuckers are living in poverty. Who got Bitcoin? The people that are making little... What do they make on the side of the street in El Salvador? Those little bracelet things.

People making bracelets on the side of the street. They sell mangoes. They sell mangoes on the side of the street in el salvador those little bracelet things people making bracelets on the side of the street they sell mangoes they sell mangoes on the side of the street they're selling corn with the mayonnaise on the side of the street rich unbelievable people got excited about this we accept bitcoin who and who in your country's accepting it fluctuates so much as like that mango is like oh 0.2 bitcoin up now two hours later now it's 0.5 bitcoin like how the fuck you gonna start buying shit? How you gonna use that as a currency? It makes no sense. That's their currency

already is fluctuating like crazy. If somebody paid you an El Salvadorian whatever the fuck it is you're gonna be furious. This is worth nothing. I wouldn't wipe my ass with El Salvadorian currency. Charmin worth more than El Salvadorian currency. Double ply I guarantee you that. I guarantee you double ply Charmin worth more than El Salvadorian currency. Easy transition. What's that? That I guarantee you double ply is stronger than El Salvadorian currency.

Easy transition. That's what I'm saying. Go to Bitcoin. It's a great move. El Salvador. The best country they could get was El Salvador. Also, they're doing no capital gains tax. What is that? El Salvador. They've been doing that. On Bitcoin. What does that mean? If you have mad Bitcoin, you can turn it.

You want to sell it at the end of the year. You don't have to pay any tax. It's going to be like a haven for people to put Bitcoin to. Pull money out of it. You think America ain't going to get that money? Try to bring that shit into America. That's true. We won't get that money. I am so anti-crypto, it's unbelievable.

You're killing everybody. I really am. I really am. And I know it annoys me the most. I know it annoys me the most killing it. Everybody invented it. I really am. I really am. And I know what annoys me the most. I know what annoys me the most about it. I like that you go, now that you're taking the position, like you just don't know anything, you have a hunch. But like a lot of these crypto people, they act like they know it.

Like remember, what was your boy Ross? That was on the shows this week. And he was like, the one I'm into is XRP because it's the banking one it's religion dog you just pick your religion and go this one sounds good and you gotta have faith you gotta have faith dog I have faith in nukes

so if America goes this is our coin I'm in it 100% but if you think for a second America is gonna let a bunch of these Fat fucking nerds Make millions of dollars out of nowhere And not come to collect

You're out your goddamn mind Don't you think the way that there's millions of people talking crypto And conferences this is what like Wall Street traders Were doing on the floor They were having these nerdy ass talks about buying this thing Versus that thing And selling now everyone's at the party This is their thing I'm still buying windows apartment buildings multi-family guys what's that several

funds just rental properties you want to do that i don't want crypto oh my god i'm getting so fucking heated by this it's driving me crazy what do you think we should do investment wise i'm bad with that i only know how to invest in myself. I would tell you straight up, if I can't touch it, I don't know how to make money on it. I have to be able to touch it. But if I can manipulate it myself and put work into it, I can make money. But I don't know how to just give money to a company and then trust that they do some shit. Introducing the Andrew Schultz coin today. Yeah.

I mean, I just don't know what the coin is. I don't know what I would do with the coin. But if it's something like this. You'd be a great investor, dog, if you just trusted your gut. No, I won't. You've got a strong gut, dog. No, the same reason I'd be a bad coach. I'd be a bad, like, drafter.

Punches. Because I know what you're saying. You'd be looking at companies and you'd be being like, I know that company is going to make it. I bet you looked at Amazon 15 years ago and you were like, you know what? This shit is all right. No. like who reads google you look at google and think yo that's the shit google that's the search engine yeah of the people no i thought i was like the late adopter to facebook i was like this is corny i still not on tiktok said netflix is dead said netflix is dead trust me don't trust my when it comes to investing in companies don't trust i only not invest in myself if i because i can find a way to problem solve and make it work but if i

give you money i don't know if you're as good as a problem solver as me you're right schultz coin let's do it the only way it's gonna work but i don't know what we do with it we can't do it what are we gonna do with this coin i don't know what the fuck get a schultz coin coin i don't even believe in but you might don't do it don't if believe in, but you might. Don't do it. If I ever try to sell a coin, don't do that shit. Telling you right now. Don't do it. I mean that shit.

Don't do it. If I ever sell a coin, don't do it. So what are you saying? Crypto is dead? Because those usually mean, you know. Crypto's dead. I'm buying into crypto. I'm investing big time.

Crypto's dead. NFTs are dead. That means we're going to the moon, guys. We're going to the moon. Crypto's dead. NFTs are dead. Look at the stock price or whatever that shit is of Bitcoin right now. I guarantee it's green for the next three months. Crypto is dead.

NFTs are dead. None of this shit works. Take your money out immediately. Save what little you have left. Can I attack any NBA? Yeah, let's talk some NBA. Okay. Your Knicks lost knicks lost my mavericks lost yep what do you think of that in general lebron lost do you have any interest anymore in the playoffs no i mean this is the worst thing that could have happened to the nba yeah like nobody wants to see an atlanta hawks

philadelphia 76ers yeah like no one cares about that series. Like they're bringing out WWE wrestlers to get some interest in the game. Yeah, I'm enjoying it, but I know and I'm always like, oh, big market team. That's what we all say as fans. You need the big market teams because casuals are done. The Clippers, you don't give a fuck about the Clippers. You know, it's really interesting

is like people go, people say this criticism of like boxing or MMA and that kind of stuff like that it's like oh you're destroying the sanctity of the sport like how are you going to let these youtubers and these influencers into the sport blah blah blah it's like they are the knicks they are the lakers right they have the big market team they bring in the casuals right nobody wants to see the indiana pacers play the atlanta hawks that would be the worst eastern conference finals in the history of basketball.

And it reflects in the ratings. Anytime there's not one of these massive market teams or dynasties in the ratings, it's always down. Absolutely. Abysmal. I mean, they changed the playoffs hoping that the Warriors would get in. Yeah. Right? They literally changed the format of the playoffs.

Please get Steph Curry in there. Please. Please. We need to make money on this first round because we know LeBron ain't making it past that. And so now we're going to have to watch the Phoenix Suns and the fucking Utah Jazz. I mean, again, I'm going to enjoy it. I don't blame anybody

who's like, that shit sounds awful. Yeah, I just don't care. I haven't been as invested this year. Even the Nets with all their all-stars, it's just like, alright, they just turn it on and then they just have a blowout. It's not even that fun. That's aren't even that hateable. Like they're so, how are you that boring as a super team?

Yeah, I know. It is kind of weird. You know what it is with the net specifically is that, um, if, if we, if this was the world cup, the nets would be the, we don't have a country team. You know, like, you know, in like the Olympics where you compete for yourself. Right. You can't compete on behalf of your country. I know. Yeah.

So it's like if your country got banned, like Russia got banned. So you got to compete on behalf of yourself. Like anybody give a fuck about you competing for you. Right. This guy be bigger than you. And no one cares about the Nets. I don't care who you are. Maybe if you're a New Jersey fan.

But if you were from New Jersey, you're a Knicks fan but if you were from new jersey you're a knicks fan let's keep it a buck nobody was a nets fan i went to nets games as a kid because the tickets were way cheaper my dad was just driving us out same with clippers right like you just go to because your dad wants you to sit closer to the floor yeah like you could actually sit pretty close as a kid and it was an amazing experience but there were no nets fans there was no was no Nets fans then. There's no Nets fans now. So now you have this super team, but nobody really cares about it. If the Nets win, nobody in New York will care about it. You know what? People are going to argue with you.

We're going to fake it. We're going to fake it, but it's not going to mean anything. No, here's a perfect argument to your point. And if you're born in Brooklyn and you're a Nets fan, fine. I don't blame you. But nobody is talking about how good it is that the Nets are good. When the knicks had three playoff games at home yeah all you heard about was man it's so good to have the garden

rock yeah oh my god like i saw people in dallas being like dude i got emotional watching that like new york basketball's back nobody's doing that for the nets all right guys we're gonna take a break for a second because i need to make sure that you're not uh getting hung over anymore because there's a way to cure it all right and. And it's not to stop drinking alcohol. It's not. You don't have to stop drinking alcohol. There are other things you can do to hydrate your damn self so that you can be good the next day. And liquid IV is the one that I do. I'm not playing with you. If I am drinking by the end of the night, I am taking a liquid IV, especially the hydration booster boosted three times. You're getting three times the hydration when you drink that. I might wake up in the morning and run it back. This is

what we're doing. I do it regularly. I do it throughout the day. Just got to want to stay hydrated. And sometimes I'm too lazy to grab more water. Who wants to drink three waters in a fucking row? Why don't you just drink one with liquid IV in it? This is a no brainer liquid IV. I'm telling you, you can get this shit everywhere. Do you want me to tell you exactly why it works? I'll tell you why. Because it contains five essential vitamins. It's got more vitamin C than an orange and as much potassium as a banana. It's healthier than the sugary sports drinks. There's no artificial flavors or preservatives and less sugar than an apple. Okay. It's made with clean ingredients, non-GMO it's vegan and free

of gluten, dairy, and soy. Just fucking drink it. So you feel better. This is such a no brainer. Okay. You want me to get into it? Let's get into it. It's got the cellular transport technology, the optimal ratio of glucose, sodium, potassium delivers water and nutrients into the bloodstream. And that's what the fuck you need to break that hangover. It's the perfect balance to help you hydrate more quickly and effectively than water alone. It's water with steroids. Don't you want your water with steroids? Everything's better with steroids. One stick of liquid IV and 16 ounces of water can give you as much hydration as two to three bottles of plain water. That's all you need to know. Hydrate yourself quickly. Grab your Liquid IV in bulk nationwide at Costco, or you can get 25% off when you go to liquidiv.com

and use our promo code flagrant at checkout. That's 25% off anything you order when you get better hydration today using promo code flagrant at liquidiv.com. Now let's get back to the show. All right, Mark, what else we got? All right, so we can talk about Fauci going off. Oh, yes.

They're sacrificing Fauci. This is really interesting to see. Yeah, what's happening with this? So, I mean, this is me doing, like, basic research, but basically Rogan had a dude on his podcast that started talking about, excuse me, Rogan had a dude on his podcast that started talking about excuse me rogan had doing his podcast that started talking about um fauci's connection to what is it called something game gain gain of function gain of function research into covid viruses or coronaviruses okay and gain of function research

is they basically like juice up the coronavirus yeah and to see how uh vaccines would work against it okay okay so they're like if we make it on steroids would it the vaccine still work right and they stopped this under obama because they thought it was dangerous because they're creating a virus that we don't have any cure for and if that got out of the lab it could potentially kill a lot of people right maybe even cause a global pandemic in 2017 under fauci's tutelage because i guess he's the guy that has to sign off on all these things right they continued that research so now this is under trump right so fauci the guy who's coming out saying like yo trump uh got rid of of the pandemic team or whatever the fuck it is, is also the guy who's like, yo, we started doing this wild ass research again.

That research was happening in the in the Wuhan lab. Right. And was funded through an organization that I believe Fauci has to give the sign off on. Fauci has to give the sign off on. So I think they find it to the tune of like six hundred thousand dollars and through it's kind of like murky, but I guess it does eventually go back to Fauci. Right. So they're funding this research in the Wuhan lab. And I guess there are a few people that worked in that Wuhan lab that did get sick with something and were hospitalized after getting sick with something

and being hospitalized i think this is in november at the time if i'm not mistaken so it looks like this whole pandemic was started from a lab leak from gain-of-function research now this is important for a couple reasons one fauci said there's no way that that happened he was all about the bat theory right it's a bat these chinese people eat bats and we're so fucking racist we're just like yeah of course they eat bats like there's this is how this shit works right and we all believe is that and he shot down this idea that it came from gain of function research or it was genetically engineered okay now the reason why it's important is because i think when indian scientists first looked at it they said

this looks genetically engineered australian scientists first look at they were like yo this looks genetically engineered like i think we made this shit or somebody made this shit and it was shot down not only was it shot down if you said that it looked genetically engineered on social media they brought down your posts. Apparently like Fauci. And I think Zuckerberg spoke and Zuckerberg was like, yo, how can I help with like the information that's going out here? And I think the conversation was, we should yank down anything that says that this is manmade because it's

not manmade. It comes from bats. There's all these press conferences where he's basically saying this virus is consistent from when, from Corona viruses that could have gone from a bat to a human being and that's what it would look like right when he very well knew that that is bullshit so he was not only lying to the american people being exalted as this fucking hero in the process but also ripping down quote-unquote fake news or misinformation there was existing all these social media platforms that actually could have given us a little bit more understanding of what

we were actually dealing with and put some responsibility on the people who fucked it up in the first place obviously it leaked in the lab in china which is fucked up but if we're funding that research we're partially responsible too it's on both i mean don't get me wrong the end will be all is probably the lab because you have to take the safety precautions necessary so these fucking viruses don't go out and cause a global pandemic but if we know that they're not taking those precautions and this lab isn't good enough to do this research why the fuck are we funding it yeah so it's a really interesting situation where fauci has been you know kind of like deified during this whole process.

But the reality is he knew some shit that he wasn't sharing with us and allowed himself to become a fucking, you know, what is it, a pandemic god. And wrote a fucking book. It seems like everybody who writes a book during the pandemic ends up fucking up big time. Like Cuomo wrote a fucking book.

This guy wrote a book. I don't know where they get the time to write their fucking books. But point being, I mean, like they gotta sacrifice the guy, they've got to sacrifice the guy. The Dems got to sacrifice the guy. All these people who are, like, the Fauci enthusiasts, they got to sacrifice them. The guy fucking lied. Got to go.

Bare minimum lied. Bare minimum. Am I missing anything here, Mark? I mean, we can't necessarily conclusively say that the lab leak theory is, like, confirmed. It's not confirmed. But all of a sudden sudden it's way more plausible it's also worth denoting that like the idea that it's man-made versus like humanly modified is not necessarily synonymous with a lab leak like inherently so like people are like oh

it's a bioweapon from china and they made it on purpose and then leaked it out to like affect the world and that's not necessarily what this theory is this would be an accidental leak right truly accident and that the virus actually is naturally occurring however it's just modified and like the spike proteins were modified just to see like the gain of function research yeah research stuff so it's like to be more nuanced it's difficult to say that like it was it wasn't done with malicious intention even on fauci's part from gain of research china's part it leaked you could say this whole thing happened. One thing I kept saying early on is like, I'll be having hunches. I said, I don't know how this isn't man-made because basic ass science, I was like, okay,

early on it causes a cough. It affects your lungs. You might need oxygen. Then all of a sudden, I give it to Giannis, he's shitting his brains out and it's affecting your digestive system. Then people are fatigued. Now they're losing your sense of smell. None of these things I know to be linked it's affecting your digestive system. Then people are fatigued. Now they're losing your sense of smell. None of these things I know to be linked.

There's a digestive system. There's a respiratory system. How the fuck is this affecting everything at once? That doesn't seem naturally occurring to me. That was my only logic

but I was like, it seems like it has to be man-made for that alone. So this doesn't, it's very easy for me to be like, yep, this shit is man-made. Accidentally leaked? Absolutely. Cool. But it is man-made. Accidentally leaked, absolutely, cool.

But it was man-made. The other things to note in defense of Fauci is that people are looking at people that emailed him and suggesting that, oh, Fauci knew. That's the big trend on Reddit and Twitter. Oh, Fauci knew this, Fauci knew that. But it's like, just because someone emails someone doesn't necessarily mean, A, that they read it,

two, that they digested all the information, that they're privy to all of it. Fauci knew that people believed that it was man-made. There's no way in hell that he didn't have a single conversation with somebody who said, it looks as if this was man-made. He, in order for him to conclude the bat theory, he has to discredit man-made theory. And he had no way to discredit there wasn't enough time to do the actual research i just think it was a way better narrative to go this came from a bat than potentially the research that i was funding

that's fair and that's what i think people are being upset at him about they're like of course you said it's bad because if it wasn't bad they're gonna look into the numbers and see that you put six hundred thousand dollars into that fucking lab where the shit leaked out of motherfucker and then more more so to his lies, like someone asked him, I think Rand Paul asked him, have you ever, did this lab ever engage in gain-of-function research?

And he said no. And he said no. On the stand, under oath. So I don't know if that's a semantics thing that like, oh, technically this lab wasn't working on gain-of-function research. If it's not technically gain-of-function research, it's actually a different type of research. Exactly. he could get off on like uh what is the term uh

technicality technicality right he could get off on a technicality but it is interesting what's happening man you know we're about to turn on on anthony fauci you know what else this calls into question people who were like aids is man-made and i remember my cousin telling me if you look at this virus he's a doctor he said if you look at this virus i can see how people think it's man-made like it's so perfect and i remember a lot of people being like word y'all say this shit came from that's a dave chapelle joke word a monkey somebody has sex with a monkey and then a human and now that to me seems like oh it seems like a very plausible cover-up to just say oh this came from an animal it came from a bat it came from a monkey when in reality it could have very well been man-made yeah maybe not for nefarious uh

with nefarious intentions but the shit could very well have been man absolutely and then it could have leaked as well yeah that's another to me the most fascinating part from like the all the email leaks which like frankly i think the headlines over exaggerated what was presented yeah but the biggest thing was this guy peter dazik okay is that he was apparently funding research at the wuhan lab and then he was also coincidentally the person that wuhan hired or that the who hired yeah in order to create like the uh who is the world health organization yeah in order to do investigative research on like the origins of the guy who's funding the research that ends up causing the global pandemic potentially also just happens to be

the guy that the WHO hire to investigate the lab where the pandemic leaked out of. Of course you're not going to get an honest investigation. And I mean, there was a lot of criticism of the WHO during this period. I'm not trying to say that Trump was right about that, but he was critical.

But it could be right. That's right. He can be right. It's OK. He could be right. He could be wrong about a million other things. I say the same thing about Alex Jones. Alex Jones could be right.

Yeah. You know, but he could also be wrong about a million other things. Yeah. So then basically he like Fauci gets an email the day after he's on fox news or some major news network promoting the like uh bat to human theory and discrediting like the lab leak theory this guy peter dazik he shoots him an email goes yo thank you so much for you know sharing the truth and you know discrediting the lab leak theory which obviously is false blah blah blah and so him being in fauci's emails thanking him for his work and contributions

to clearing up the narrative, so to speak, I thought was particularly interesting. Now, where do you go with that? I mean, basically what you just said. This guy is potentially responsible for funding research, potentially knew more than the average person as to the origins of the virus, and then is thanking people

in high places that are using their platform to try to help him get out clean. I wonder if China and America had a conversation and they're like, yo, we're both responsible for this shit. It came from a bat. Maybe.

You guys funded it. You guys wanted to do this research. It happened to be over here. Yeah. There's a specific thing and I have a note here for it. I'll actually look it up. But like there was a certain level of security that was necessary for this type of research. Security, not like people know about it, but actual like physical security. Like there's a certain like health requirement. It was code. code it needed to be code four but they were only like code two

so to continue doing it at that level is dangerous because it uh there's not many barriers to exactly there are more opportunities for a leak so they weren't even updating the lab for the necessary precautions chinese shit so who? But it is interesting. What if both parties are like, listen, we're both fucked up here. We're going to say it came from a bat because if it came from a bat, there's nothing we could do.

They'll make fun of you about your wet markets. You could shut down the wet markets for a few weeks. Big fucking deal. But the reality is the whole world got shut down because of some American research in an Asian and a Chinese lab. Yeah. And, you know, I was just about to say,

that goes to what I was going to say, which was they're sacrificing Fauci, obviously, because there's no way he's the highest ranking person that knew about this. There are a lot of people above him being like, yeah, you fucked up. Bats. This can't be on America.

This can't be on China. Bats. So who's above him? That's what I'm trying to understand. Like, who appoints him? You brought up I'm trying to understand. Who appoints him? You brought up Trump. If I'm Trump and I appointed this guy, I would. Trump's in the bottom.

He's been in. I thought you said it was 2017. So it was when Trump. Oh, it came back when Trump was in power. But he's been working for the government for the last like 30 years or something like that. I think Jimmy Carter. Yeah, he was popping during the AIDS epidemic. Okay.

So when the research came back, that could still fall on. Matter of fact, epidemics just started with him. Like, he might be the architect. He was around during Spanish flu, probably. Son. Guy's mad old. Fauci is there to start pandemics. That's his job, bro.

That's his fucking job. Maybe he's Thanos. Ebola, SARS, MERS, that motherfucker was down for all of them. AIDS. AIDS as well. That's when he really started to make his name. Maybe he's trying to help us, though. Maybe he's trying to help us, or maybe he's the guy that's when he really started to make his name maybe he's trying to help us though maybe he's trying to help us or maybe he's the guy that's put in there to

fuck shit up exactly no he's trying to get rid of the he's trying to get oh he's trying to call the bro he's thanos the herd oh my god fauci is fucking thanos man wow comes through with the gain of function wow snap snap wow anyway it's just interesting times to see this happen because he was such a fucking hero and people about to flip on his ass so goddamn quick so what do you think happens he gets locked up nah no these guys never get locked up yeah because locking him up would mean personal accountability for america yeah yeah right it's a weird thing like weird we're tied and the people above him that allowed this to happen because if if you if one of us does some horrendous shit that's still on you yeah you know what i mean so it's kind of in your best interest to be like all right man let me take care of the

keep this shit quiet let me take care of this it also proves all the right wing guys correct you know what i mean like they're loving this shit the trumps the ramp all take crews like yeah they're all vindicated guys because the whole time they were like this guy fowler you know what the fuck he's talking about they were talking mad shit even before they knew anything it was like yo fuck him forever but i get that i get that because the guy was making decisions that really weren't based on anything he was doing what i thought was the best what i thought he was doing what he believed was the best uh decision for the time making the best decisions for the time right like that's what every governor and anybody in power did right some were overly precautious and then some were maybe not

precautious enough right right like some people would criticize desantis about that down florida they'll be like yo man you should have had more people with masks you should have done that maybe you could have saved even more lives right and then people were critical of cuomo for the opposite reason you allow people to go broke you allow people to go broke they might be alive but they have no livelihood 100 yeah 100 so i always assume the best with fauci i was like he's being safe because that's his job is safety yeah his job is not supposed to be hey go out there and wing it that's not what scientists do you go to your dentist he tells you to brush your fucking teeth three times a day and that always bothered me not always i read it a few months ago it's like a new york times summary of an article i didn't read the other shit. One thing that always bothered me, not always, I read it a few months ago, it was like a New York Times summary of an article.

I didn't read the whole shit, obviously, I'm me. They said something like, they knew early on masks helped. I remember them saying masks don't do anything, and I bought into it, but I was like, masks should help. And they said that because they wanted to save masks for frontline workers. So they just told all of us

masks don't do anything. Instead of saying the real reason, which is, hey, if you told us that you were saving it for frontline workers, we would have bought all of us masks don't do anything. Instead of saying the real reason. Which is, hey. If you told us that you were saving it for frontline workers we would have bought all them shit. There's a run on masks, toilet paper all over again. But at least you have to acknowledge that you, not you, but them, you set the precedent of lying. Yeah.

You set the precedent of lying, so why should we believe you? Once you lie once, we can't believe you no more. We're always going to be skeptical. And you give the people who want to buy into the narrative that this whole thing is a hoax, etc., etc., you gave them the ammunition. Whether I agree with them or not, I can't disagree with the fact that you gave them the ammunition by lying off rip.

Yo, and you know what would have been a better idea? To say nothing about masks until you know that the frontline workers had enough. That's a great move. Don't cause the mask drought, right? If you talk about how there's not going to be any gas, everybody's going to run up and get the gas. That's why we had the,

where there was a little gas shortage, I think in a few states. You said it was completely fabricated. Yes and no. Like there was an actual gas shortage, but it wasn't actually going to affect people's day-to-day lives. But once people found out about the gas shortage,

then they started buying it up and created an actual gas shortage. Gas isn't by my house in Florida. It was out of gas for two days. So here's the thing with it. I was talking to Mark about this. Correct me if if i'm wrong here but like basically what happens is we always have like an extra week of gas yeah all these gas stations have massive wells of gasoline right yeah and it's there in case there's a shortage when there's a shortage as long as people just go out to get gas in a normal yeah way they have that week that will tie them over until the next week

when they start getting filled up again. Toilet paper. Literally the same thing happened with toilet paper. Exactly. So it caused hysteria. Stop saying shit

that's going to cause hysteria. If you shut your mouth, we're going to be okay. Maybe they, I don't know. It's tricky. It's tough because you are thinking these are the frontline workers

risking their lives more than anybody else. We'll lock everybody else up. These guys can't be locked up. Yeah, yeah, yeah yeah but you can't lie because if you get caught it's not worth it that's the thing about honesty it sucks but if you get caught in a lie it's never worth it honesty is always going to be more worth it than lying and getting caught that's facts and they fuck their whole credibility so now i'm a guy who believes mass work but it's hard to argue with a guy who's like yeah yeah, I'm a cuck.

I'm a liberal cuck. Do you wear a mask anywhere anymore? I wear it when I know they need me to. But now that I'm vaccinated, I don't feel the need. Ubers? Ubers? I took a line from you, which is you get in, and if the Uber guy's wearing a mask, you say, hey, bro, I'm vaccinated. If you don't want the mask,

it's fine. And then if they take theirs off, my shit is off. But if they keep theirs on? Then I'm vaccinated. If you don't want the mask, it's fine. And then if they take theirs off, my shit is off. Yeah. But if they keep theirs on? Then I'm like... Most of the time, I haven't really run into that. Most of the time, they've said, I have to keep mine on because Uber makes me.

You can take yours off. I'll walk through the whole airport with no mask on. Fire, dog. Both sides. Body, bro. Orlando and New York. No one said anything? Nope.

They said it to me. I'm right next to them. Yeah. Literally the same walk in the lady looks at me I was right behind me looks at me and goes uh sir can you put on your mask I go all right my roommate seems to call that NF of BP natural fear of black people yeah they just don't want to say shit to you could just cut in line with Andrew and they'll be like sir there's a line here that also. No, no, no, you're fine. If you have the mask and you're not wearing it correctly, it's easy to be like, yo, wear it correctly. Whereas if you don't have a mask, they're like, I'm not dealing with this.

No mask on. Oh, you didn't have a mask. I had no mask on. He had no mask on. I thought it was his beard. I thought it was his beard and they like somehow saw it as a mask. Al has a different theory. No, it's because I'm black. They don't want that confrontation. Be like, oh, why are No, it's because I'm black. They don't want that confrontation. Be like, oh, why are you doing this?

Cause I'm black. And then once we pull that card. It's interesting because it's a little bit removed from your theory, which is like a nineties theory. Which is like, they're afraid a black guy is going to do something physical. No, they're afraid of being called racist. Yes.

The fear has changed. It's really interesting. Before the fear was they were racist and they thought a black person would do something fucked up to them and you thought that because you're racist now they're not racist i mean who knows but now they're not racist but their fear is someone thinking they are yeah so they won't even say a single thing to a black guy yeah i'm not afraid of getting hurt by black people i'm afraid of getting canceled by black people yes that's funny yeah so you really believe that's the case i don't know i didn't i didn't subscribe to it but maybe it is

because they're such in the right in that moment and also all the tsa workers are fucking dominicans and shit like yeah yeah exactly i don't know if it was that's your moment to prove you're not racist at all by being like hey black guy put on, put on your mask. I mean, I would say black guy, I think. Doesn't help that case. Hey, black guy, maybe you don't start that sentence with. Yeah, that was an implied thing. But hey, hey buddy, put on your mask. Hey buddy, put on your mask.

Yeah, yeah. Even buddy, I think is kind of dangerous. Why? It's like close to boy. You're Canadian. Buddy's like boy. All you guys say is buddy. Nah, but it's like kind of racist.

That's where I say buddy, it's from my Canadian comic friends. Call a black guy buddy? I don't know, man. Yeah. Buddy, you could call. Boy, you can't call. You have to say king.

God damn. You get an ass whooping for that. Hey, boy. But boy is so great. What's up, boy? I would say that to my boys. But you can't. It's contextual.

Yeah, it really is. You can't. It's like bitch. Black people, it's contextual to a woman. But it's also... Oh, I hear what you're saying. You know what I mean? If you're talking to a girl like, hey, bitch, that's a problem.

But you're like, who's this cute-ass bitch? Are we going to get the bitches in the pool? That was an iconic line from Jelly Roll, bro. So we're going to get the bitches in the pool and the bitches are right there. They're just sitting right there doing absolutely nothing. Speaking of bitches, I almost saw your dog get decapitated last night.

Oh, yeah, my dog does this thingcapitated last night. Oh, yeah. My dog does this thing where it shits like basically in the street. It's just bad. So, Andrew, we were watching the fight. We have to go and take the dog on the last walk because he lost the battle, this girl. So, we're walking outside and Andrew wanted this dog to shit so quickly and soon that he was willing. The dog's head was hanging into the street it was and he's pulling it by the neck I see an oncoming car and Andrew

wasn't pulling the dog back because the dog's like dog shitting it's so hard they'd be taking their time don't they no no this was something it was so easy in Miami because I just bring him to two patches of grass New York is different, bro. New York is different. There's no grass. It's concrete. It's concrete. It's concrete. I'm trying to find grass for this dog to take a shit. You just realized it's concrete. Yeah, but dude, the dog used to do it because all he knew was concrete. Yeah.

And now I got him addicted to grass, and now he doesn't know what to do. That's a good metaphor. It's like an eastern toilet for us. That shit has a hole in the ground. When you're up in India, you'll see it. You just can be like, I'll just hold it. I'll just wait. What do you need?

Yeah, that's a good metaphor, bro. That's why I'm not buying my girl a nice bag, okay? That's why. No, I'm not getting her used to a nice bag. All right, guys. We're going to take a break for a second because you nerds need to stay up longer. Yes, you gamers aren't spending enough time gaming. I know you don't see your families.

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That Indian shit that happened. This was like the biggest fucking story. I don't know why it was promoted so much. I don't know. Did y'all notice this? Yeah. I was getting shocked how many people were so much. I don't know. Did y'all notice this? Yeah. Yeah. I was getting shocked how many people were sending it to me.

Some TMZ did a report. Everybody did a report on this. I'm like, what's going on? This is like the industry plant of stories. Yeah. You know what I mean? So basically in India, this guy was going to marry this woman. Yep.

And she had a heart attack. Yep. Died. Yep. So he married her sister. Yep. Same day. Absolutely. Same day. At the sister yep same day absolutely at the wedding

at the wedding yeah and akash how do you feel about this guy's a king okay i love this guy you know how much money went into that wedding yeah this selfish hoe gonna die the day of bitch you can't wait two weeks yeah her bro i i honestly i hate this fucking woman dog selfish don't don't value money yeah i'm glad this guy dodged a bullet not marrying her i don't know she got no values this girl she don't hold on to nothing the sister was about it dog that's a soldier also y'all forget it's probably an arranged marriage so who the fuck cares really yeah he probably knew them the same amount of time it's the same genetics you marrying the genetics in an arranged marriage i'm marrying the family yeah i'm marrying the bloodline bio data same

bloodline same bio dataline. Same bio data. I mean, low key, he might have given that bitch a heart attack to marry the sister. Yo, you think the sister was fine? I think if the sister's better looking, we need to compare them. If the sister's better looking, you give a girl a heart attack. Who dies from a heart attack at 20 years old? Never happens. I don't think that's a real thing that happens. I think he killed his sister.

A selfish person? Or the sister killed her sister so that she could be the chosen one we need to look into this probably had a wedding gown that day like why do you have a wedding gown oh you just happen to fit in that's why you don't wear white to a wedding younger maybe she's older she's getting a little desperate uh-huh nobody liked her she's like look this is my chance i gotta plan everything perfectly kill her the day of the wedding india is not wasting no six figures. Indian rom-com. That's why you can't wear white to a wedding. If I see a girl wearing white at another girl's wedding,

I'm assuming there's an assassination happening. Why are you so prepared? What's wrong with you? It is kind of crazy, but if you look into your culture, it makes sense. I can't believe this doesn't happen all the time. In India. It's a seven-day wedding.

They marry at 17. The girl's Bro, it's a seven-day wedding. Yeah, but they marry at like 17. The girl's exhausted after seven days fucking dancing nonstop. Like, I can't believe more women don't die at their weddings. Of a heart attack? Yes. No. They're up until four in the morning. How late are you up the night before your wedding?

I don't think you sleep, to be honest with you. That's my point, bro. It's like Burning Man. Yeah. Nobody dies at Burning Man. That we know of. No, we do. Nah, it's a cover-up, bro.

We literally know. Look at Fauci's emails, bro. Watch what Fauci said about Burning Man. That we know of. No, we do. Nah, it's a cover-up, bro. We literally know. Look at Fauci's emails, bro. Watch what Fauci said about Burning Man. Burning now is that wife when they cremate in the dead ass. That's Burning now. So I just think it's interesting. Like, what happens? Like, Shorty dies, and everybody already is there.

Yeah. And then does she- Hey, it's India. Motherfuckers die, y'all. People die riding the train. She died. That's what it is. No, the brother commented.

They brought her dead body into the other room. y'all people die riding the train she died that's what it is no the brother commented they brought her dead body into the other room uh had a team meeting because they still need that dowry swapped up and had the wedding with the dead sister in the other room she got to attend the wedding after almost that's very generous this guy is a hero man we need to throw a parade for this man what a noble guy because he saved the day but so did she got saved but he saved the day he saved because shorty obviously wasn't married loser bitch yeah and then he came through and then i mean i guess she she hungered games in a little bit like she was just like i nominated this trip yeah right she pulled up right she was with

it but he he didn't even look her down. Usually there's a meeting at least once before. He doesn't know who he's meeting. He just blindly married this woman to save the day for everybody there. 2021, dog. That's extreme. That's like 1950s.

That's a reality show, B. We need to follow that family. Didn't your parents meet the day of the wedding? My dad didn't know he was getting married until the day of his wedding. I girl so that's the same thing yeah i don't see why this is that crazy if you my dad was at another wedding and then his cousins came up to him and they were like two cousins were like scared to tell him they're like tell him he's like somebody fucking tell me and they're like you're getting married today he's getting fitted for clothes on the way there this should be happening wait wait he was at another wedding? He was at another family member's wedding.

And then he gets married the same day? Had to leave that wedding to go to his own wedding. Get the fuck out. That's crazy. Bruh, I'm saying. I think your dad's a hero, yo. Yo. More than this chick.

You wouldn't say that if you saw him the rest of the marriage. But on that day, he was heroic. You kind of undermined my point about this dude, but yeah. Yeah. That day, he was heroic you kind of undermined my point about this dude but yeah yeah that day he was heroic yeah he did what he needed to do now do you know about this state where this happened real quick before we get into the state we gotta talk about how my man dodged a bullet with this heart attack lady yeah because she was gonna have health issues the whole marriage popped up out of nowhere yeah and that didn't show up in the bio data. If anything, he should be upset at her family because her family knew

her heart wasn't right. Where's the wonder lick? Oh, yeah. That's another thing. You need to go into those tests. You need to find out. We need the bride facts. Give us the bride facts. 100%. Bride facts is perfect because if he did manage to marry her, if she saved that heart attack, she dies a week later.

He married a lemon almost. He married a motherfucking lemon, bro. Come on. Ahmad, what you think, dog? In Pakistan, the same shit wouldn't have gone down? Why? He don't have a mic. Why are you asking this motherfucker like you don't have a new podcast every single day?

I just want to hear an opinion of a brown guy because he's looking at me a little judgmentally. Well, so do the people at home. He's looking at me like I'm fucking up, so I just need to do some detective work here. Don't throw that shit on him, bro. They got honor killings. They would have killed that bitch for even thinking about having a heart attack. The second she grabbed her chest, no, bitch.

Stones. Get the stones. Alright, so you were going to say this state? Yeah, it happened in Uttar Pradesh. That's my state, bro. That's where your people are from? It makes the most sense. You the most savage?

Let me tell you something. Nothing ever made more sense, to be honest. Really? Why, why, why, why, why? Oh, we backward, dog. We be backward. Is that like the country? What is the Uttar Pradesh of America?

Alabama. Really? Probably. Like, are you guys a punchline? Actually, it is, though. Are you a punchline? Yeah, we're kind of a punchline actually it is though are you a punchline yeah we're kind of a punchline if you're in Bombay

or whatever Mumbai the comedians will use Uttar Pradesh they have so we call all of our in like my part of India at least you call all your older brothers Bayez

people call us that but like in a derogatory way oh like boy it's like an idiot guy who's like it's boy yeah I guess so

it's supposed to be older people but for some reason they use it to us and it's like an idiot guy who's like... It's boy. Yeah. I guess so. It's supposed to be older people, but for some reason they use it to us and it's like an insult. Like, yeah, you're like some backwards idiot. Like, you're like a dummy. You're like the Appalachians. You're like the Appalachians. This is the wild browns of West Virginia. I'm sure there's more backwards, but we up there. You know what I mean? That's why I said

Mississippi, Alabama. I thought you were like a high-caste. I'm high-caste. I don't mean the status. I don't mean the status. Bro, he's like the richest guy in Alabama. What the fuck? Prince of Alabama. I thought you were like a high caste. I'm high caste. I don't mean the status. I don't mean the status. Bro, he's like the richest guy in Alabama, bro. What the fuck? Prince of Alabama. Bill Clinton is from Arkansas. What you know about it? You know what I mean?

You could be. Nah, bro. I thought you were royalty. Yeah, me too. Like, this totally changes how I feel about you, bro. Like, I thought you were from the bomb ass caste and your dad was a politician or some shit. You were right about both of those things, but that don't mean the state.

I'm telling you, Bill Clinton, bro. Arkansas. What's this barnyard wedding we about to go to? I don't know, poor Indian wedding? Hey, we in America now. Thank God it's Punjabi, bro. Thank God. That's why you're not having no elephants at your wedding, yo. Yo, if you were from Mumbai, you would have had some elephants in your wedding, bro.

Yo, fuck this Uttar Pradesh wedding, yo. Ain't nobody. Yo, fuck this Uttar Pradesh wedding, yo. Hey. Ain't nobody want to go to this Uttar Pradesh wedding. Come on, bro. Hey, bro, if you want to save me some money, don't show up. Nah. I'm about to not.

I'm about to just go to the fucking zoo instead and get my fix. Yo, if you see Indians at the zoo, do you just pretend it's a wedding? Yo, real talk, why don't y'all just have the Indians at the zoo, do you just pretend it's a wedding? Yo, real talk. Why don't y'all just have the wedding at the zoo? The animals are there already. Yeah, that's a good point. Just bring us all to the Bronx Zoo, start the wedding, and do it right in front of the elephant cage or the hippopotamus enclosure.

I love this idea. This is the most Indian a wedding, son. Why are you spending all this time moving elephants, bro? The elephants are already there. They have a house. Let's go to Ringling Brothers. You want to go to the circus? Barnum and Bailey Circus.

Ringling. That's what I call it. Exactly. They're trained there. So at least you can ride it easily. I mean, maybe not you could ride it. Maybe the Barnum and Bailey's could. He would teach me pretty quickly.

Probably. These are subdued animals. Son, I thought we were going to some high class yeah i know we go into a fried chicken wedding bro this is hey can you believe this wait but your girl's not fried chicken wedding wait i gotta give damian lemon credit for this he was telling me he called him fried chicken weddings and that's the weddings that would be in the apartment Like they would do project weddings But like the girl would walk down the aisle

In the apartment So he would call it fried chicken weddings And I'm not gonna lie it was kind of lit Bro there's some kind of romantic about it I know it's real love I almost got married in my house See isn't that beautiful we not putting on airs Damn son

We ain't putting on airs either bro maybe y'all should yeah we looking for some bomb ass indian wedding but what state is your girl's family from i do know are they from like a nice like a nice yeah yeah they'll they'll have a nicer wedding thank god for sure okay thank god but yeah up shit bro yeah in that up that up it's what it is damn son that's my people i can't betray my culture by giving y'all getting UP shit bruh getting that UP that UP it's what it is damn son that's my people I can't betray my culture

by giving y'all a beautiful wedding you getting a mid budget wedding so I'm all about that though I'm all about that though we almost canceled our shit

this weekend I'm all about that though how many times has it almost been it's a lot it's like what are we doing here it's a lot

ain't it it's a lot yeah the fried chicken sounds nice now huh anybody who had a fried chicken wedding is the smartest person it is a lot but what's interesting is like we all get attached to these ideas of what we want for a wedding right we get attached to these ideas and we all have our like bottom lines about the things that we can't live without yeah Yeah. And like, I don't want to get married without my boys there. My people.

That's very important to me. Same. And my girl don't want to get married without her mom, you know, seeing her get, you know, in that dress. But she would do that in front of four people. She would do that in front of her parents and my parents. God bless her. And I'm like, all right, that might be a possibility.

But if anybody outside of our parents are there i can't do it yeah there's floodgates i just emotionally you feel like you're leaving people out it would break my heart because my friends are just as important as my family to me that's my family i didn't have like i had a big family but i wasn't super close to my extended family so my friends are my family so i'm not gonna have my boy jamil or bobby or you see picture me getting married and then you're like yo so i didn't make the cut yeah i think the cut is rough say what i didn't make the cut is rough it's fucking rough that's rough that like that is right there you are you are drawing a line in the sands yeah of who your close friends are who your colleagues are yeah dog, dog. You know what I mean? And I'm saying this right now

on the podcast. A lot of y'all about to find out. Some of y'all watching and listening right now is like, nah, that's my boys, my close friends. We about you. You a colleague, bro. Yeah, yo, that's my colleague. You and me are colleagues, bro. Like, it's no love lost. It just wasn't that much love there.

I never found that shit. It is. It is that. 100 that 100 so but the amount of money that you could pay for these things oh well this is no lie this is the lie they give you okay they try to tell me they're like oh no you got to get the extra money for the buffet because it's your only wedding you're only getting married once yeah i'm not no simp yeah fuck out of here with that bro i could have seven of these like you can't get caught up in this only one marriage thing that's where they get you so you got to go into it being like no i could have 10 maybe 12 who knows like you can't get oh you could do more weddings you can't get

bogged down with it you know i mean it could be with the same girl i was always like yo i might run it back when i turn 30 do the vows again i have another wedding i'm actually supportive of that that's what i'm saying like okay with like we can't ball out now but like don't get caught up in that fucking all you got to do is the only wedding nah fuck you guys yeah i'm gonna have 10 weddings i'm i'm with you on that just mindset wise i'm with you on that mindset wise but then what happens is like the thing that i care about and i'm sure you went through this as well because not only do you have to consider friends you got to consider family your family goes crazier than anybody but you don't even fuck with some of the family you gotta gotta consider them. You can't not invite family. I will.

We can't. If your last name's Schultz, you might not be on the list. Is there gonna be a box office at your wedding, bro? There's gonna be scalpers, bro. If your last name's Schultz, you might not be on the list. There's gonna be scalpers at the wedding. There might be. You could get text messages like, I've been at Will Call for a half hour. What's going on? You're gonna be there a little

longer. You might as well wait for my next wedding but but yeah so it's just like if i want these people here because they're important to me people cost money yeah you would say what you said to me was serious if you don't come if i don't come you what i'm gonna save your ass some money so that is bare minimum people need food they need drinks if there's an outdoor component to the wedding they need heat you know they need staff to feed all these motherfuckers buy all this alcohol there's a lot of dance you gotta have a dj dance dj why do all this if you're not gonna take pictures and

remember it for the rest of your life you need some pictures makeup artist bro it's like a set it's like you're filming a fucking vx1 artist oh my god our makeup bitch stole our deposit the first one cinderella brides you ain't shit you stupid bitch why didn't we talk about this earlier i'll be forgetting sometimes because of the pandemic yeah we yeah whatever she ain't shit point is the audacity to call yourself an artist i I'm off the fucking bandwagon right away. I will push back on you, but I want to hear this rant. You think you and Da Vinci do the same shit? I think they're more impressive than Da Vinci. How is that?

Because Da Vinci ain't turned no ugly bitches cute. Every bitch was ugly back then. But I ain't fucking. David was five feet tall. How fine is that statue? It's a beautiful statue. All I'm trying say is like makeup has made me question my eyesight like before i knew i had a stigma whatever it is i probably been with some girls and in the morning i was like oh fuck if art is supposed to make you feel if as a purpose of art supposed to create a visceral reaction in

your heart yeah that shit made me feel makeup doesn't me go go go if i could replace you with a bitch at a carnival putting paw prints on somebody's face yes you're not an artist yeah i don't know i've never been horny looking at a painting say what i've never been horny looking at a painting that's a good point i've never looked at painting oh that painting is fire i used to jerk off the pictures though yeah what's that painting pictures not paintings but pictures oil painting where you jerk I used to jerk off to pictures, though. Yeah, what's that? That's how old I am. Painting? Pictures, not paintings, but pictures. An oil painting where you jerked off to a past... I think back in the day, you probably jerked off to some oil painting. I'm positive, dog.

Especially oil, because it's got a little texture. It's 3D a little bit. Yeah, dog. Rubbing your hands and nipples. You added to the watercolor? Yeah. It's all dripping. It's another layer.

All I'm trying to say is, but I hear what you're saying. You're not an artist if you work at Sephora. I'm sorry. You an artist like a Subway sandwich artist is an artist oh i like that take i can make just the same you know hey what they do with the sandwich is impressive they might be artists though i don't know you are equal level artist i'll take that you and a subway sandwich person same level of artistry same level of art same love they take a piece of bread and turn it into something delicious what about martial arts? Is that an artist? You kick my ass, I'm not gonna argue with you.

You got your ass beat by an artist? I said... You got beat up by an artist. Come on, Akash. You know, Akash fought this dude yesterday, knocked him out, and then went back to doing his art. Come on, son. You gonna be an art project? Hey, son. Yeah.

We are martial, bro. Probably a lot of these fat makeup artists could beat the shit out of me, too, if we're being a buck about it. But I still believe it. Yeah, but you don't want your makeup done by some pretty bitch. It's like, I don't want food cooked by a skinny girl. That's a good point. You know what I mean?

You want someone who knows how to make delicious food. Like, I want you missing parts of your body. I want your husband dead. If your husband died of some type of heart disease Or diabetes You can make dessert for me Widow brownies Widow brownies is fire bro

Put your husband in the dirt You're not a good cook unless you put your husband in the dirt That's true that's a fact You want to know who could cook their ass off That dead bride bitch That dead bride bitch. That dead bride bitch could probably make a mean chicken tikka masala because she put herself in the dirt. Oh, with the heart attack.

The sister, she can't cook as well. There was an extra butter. Say what? I bet the sister was cooking for her. He married the right one. Whoever was making that meal, he married the right one. He married the right one. He married the right one. Point is, you could be good at makeup you're not an artist fair enough

fair enough i'm not gonna give too much pushback on it but i will say this the marriage shit is a racket because with all this money that i'm just trying to like impress my friends and like make my parents and her parents proud we could buy a not buy but like put a down payment on a home create a hedge fund create a maybe not a hedge fund but like you could have a, not buy, but like put a down payment on a home. Create a hedge fund. Create a, maybe not a hedge fund, but like you could have a very small home. What I said to her was this. I was like, think about the money that we spend on a wedding. Yep. And how much nicer a place we could get when we buy.

Did that work? That resonated. So I was like, don't think about like, let's say, I'm not saying we're spending this, but let's say for example, we were to spend a100,000 on a wedding, which people do regularly. Right. And I'm not talking about like uber wealthy people. Right. I'm talking about people will spend $100,000.

That's a small budget. That's a. Yeah. He's from Moroccan Jews, right? It is the minimum you can spend on an Indian wedding. That's the rehearsal dinner. Yeah. $100,000 is the minimum you can spend on an Indian wedding.

$100,000. Jeez. I mean, on an Indian wedding. $100,000. Shoot. I mean, that's crazy, right? Because we got the multiple functions. That's where you're like. It's three weddings. It's a gain of function. It's a gain of function.

$100,000 is. Parasites. $500,000 more on your house or your apartment. If you actually do the math. That's great. That's great. So it's like, do you want $100,000? We could spend this $100,000 now and then lose it forever.

Or instead of a $2 million house, you get a $2.5 million house. What does.5 get you? Does it get you another room? Does it get you a better location for the place? What does half a million dollars get you, right? And I think that way you're looking at it going, I'm going to spend the next 10, 20, 30 years in this home. We could have really used that extra bedroom.

We could have really used a more convenient neighborhood. We could have really used that outdoor space. We did not need that wedding to be that crazy. Because as crazy as that wedding is, people are going to forget about that. You're going to be posting your house. If this is about impressing others, you're going to be posting that house for a long time. So if your girl's complaining about the kitchen, you got to go, go yo why'd you want to get the buffet that's on you you could have had your dream kitchen and said you wanted a buffet that's on you you want to feed everybody instead of just feeding me selfish selfish hey during covid a lot of this

happened though a lot of people had to push back like the big few hundred person weddings opted for those smaller weddings yeah And now they are happy. The real estate market booming, isn't that? That's probably why. That's why they save money on weddings. I'm getting married to Visoka. I'm getting married to Visoka. Agnes going to officiate.

Agnes leaving. We can't get married to Visoka, dog. You know what I'm saying? No, I spoke to the other guy. Oh, okay. I still think I'm doing it. Yo, son. I literally might get married To Veselka bro

Yeah that'd be fire I don't I was trying to think about this I don't know if this is a crazy idea Or if it's wild But like What if I What if we somehow found a way

To get the whole block The whole corner of the block Oh So It's Veselka It's Mud Cafe It's Get some like

Mr. Softy trucks And that kind of shit And then just take the whole corner and then because it has to be videotaped, because it has to be photographed we get shooting privileges permits so that the whole block is kind of sequestered

I'm loving this I'm loving this What's also Veselka? Veselka is this iconic diner in New York. We used to eat there after pretty much every show. Every single show. Yeah. And it's a Ukrainian...

Oh, that pierogi thing that you used to bring? Yeah. Yeah. It's also our first date, me and my girl. Oh, shit. Yeah, yeah, which I forgot. I thought we had our first date somewhere else. And then I had to scramble on that one.

But we went to the other place after the zelka but um but yeah i don't know there's part of me it's like i'm not getting to marry no fucking diner but i already married on a whole block a diner and a little block party block party we kind of list you'll probably save money yeah but we're probably not gonna make that happen but i'm just trying to think of ideas the pierogi wedding bro the pierogi fried chicken wedding we're doing a pierogi wedding international weddings allow you to cut the list the best yeah you cut the list but again for me i want people to be there all right guys we're gonna take a break for a second because uh we got to care about our families

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But also, like, I'm old. This is the other thing. When you get married old, and I think this is the reason why motherfuckers get married young, when you get married young, your friends don't have kids. Oh, yeah, that shit's funny. Yeah. My friends got kids.

Yeah. Me asking my friends to take a weekend off is is a huge undertaking they gotta get friends who can't make it for kids literally that and i said bring them and they're just like no i don't i wouldn't do that don't bring the i wouldn't have fun bring the kids don't bring on those no no don't bring the kids get a bounce house for the kids in the bounce disrespect put the attention on your wife no unless it's your niece or nephew which you have a bunch of like akash is letting like his friends friends kids come yeah that's fire i'm letting your friends friends kids come they're not bringing them family friend but you you gave him permission right no i was like i had i gotta

ask but as far as i'm concerned i didn't say i gotta ask actually you just went in i love that bring all the baby dog how you say no to a baby hire a babysitter get Drake Bell to be your babysitter I'll be honest that kid would love to watch him can we talk about this though I don't know if we spoke about this on podcast but like if you got a kid

don't ask me to hang out with you and your kid I don't ask me to hang out with you and your kid. I don't want to do it. That's not us hanging out. We're just babysitting your kid. I love it, yo. Fuck that. Fuck that.

Get a babysitter to watch the fucking kid. And then me and you hang out. Or tell me, hey, do you want to come over and look after my kid with me? And then I'll do that. Set the expectation right. Don't be like, yo, let's hang out. And I come over to the house. And then we just babysitting this kid the whole fucking time. Oh, you just want to come over and look after my kid with me and then i'll do that set the expectation right don't be like yo let's hang out and i come over to the house and then we just babysitting this kid the whole fucking time oh you just want to be prepped and warned in advance is i understand i wonder if we've spoken about this before but like i understand you know when

like you're talking to me and i just start looking at my phone yeah how infuriating that must be for you that's i didn't understand that until hanging around my friends who have kids yeah because we try to have a conversation yeah and then they're just like yeah that's totally cool take that out of your mouth honey take that and there's no connection whatsoever yeah don't do this it's funny though that you think looking at your phone is as important as keeping your child alive it's not your child's fine like he's just eating the floor like he's gonna be okay he's resilient kids are resilient yeah i just think it's stupid. Like, why are we hanging out? What's the point of this?

What's the point of this? They need you. That's the thing. The ones that have the kids, they need you. They're trying to get that original feeling of friendship. So let someone watch the kid, and then we go have some friendship time. But how old is the kid? That makes a difference.

It don't matter. Five-year-old? It don't matter. Kid's old? It don't matter. Kid's mad funny. He's got jokes running around. Nope. Come on, bro. No.

If he's five, you can hang with him. The older the kid is, the more annoying he is. Yeah. Babies are the best. Once a kid hits about eight or nine, I'm good.

No, no, not eight or nine. That's not a kid anymore. It's like a teen, basically. That's like a tween. Those are the worst. That's the worst age. What's consent really, guys? But you think with a five-year-old, they're mad funny.

They got jokes. You care because they're your family. If they're not your family, I don't care about your jokes. You know what I mean? I got plenty of funny friends. You think I need to hang out with you? You think you're my funniest friend? You don't think I have the funniest friends in the world?

I'd go hang out with them if I want to laugh.'m here to hang out with my friend you haven't done enough living yet for you to be interesting to me right whatever you do is interesting to your dad right you know you walk and you fucking sing a song and clap that's super interesting to your dad i've seen people walk clap sing songs some of the best in the world i've seen you know what i mean so none of this is interesting to me at all and uh it's just a waste of my fucking time. But what if you have a kid? I'm not inviting you over to look at my kid. And if I do, I'm saying, listen, you're coming over here to babysit my kid with me.

Don't come here with no important shit to discuss because I ain't going to care about it. You got problems with your girl? You better save it because I'm not going to be paying attention to you. You and I are going to be paying attention to this little motherfucker right here because that's the most important thing in the room. So if you got anything to talk to me about, I'm not going to listen. I'm going to pretend like I'm listening while I look at this fucking kid. So I suggest you do the exact goddamn same thing. We're going to have fake conversation and just look at the kid.

That's what we're doing together. We're looking at the kid together. Why don't we be honest about what this is? Do you agree with this? It's honest, though. It's honest. We're not hanging out, bro. We're not hanging out.

I don't think Doug is a big fan of kids. I'm going to be honest. He's amazing. He's amazing with children. It's unbelievable. I think you're... Doug's got a big Jewish family, bro.

That guy loves kids. Massive. It's hard for him to be here because his sisters have kids. It's difficult for him to not be there and be around a family. I told Andrew I might want to go away for 4th of July weekend

and he just made up that we might have something to do. I'm like, bro, I moved away from a very possessive family. You're asking me this way ahead in advance. We might have to do something. That's America's birthday. Less than a month. It's a whole month. So much things can happen.

So much can happen. It's true. all i'm trying to say is listen why don't we just be honest none of us have kids in this room right no none of us have kids in this room right what what i didn't think anything of it till you left what what Some of us could have kids. I didn't want to make the joke. I didn't want to make it. But none of us have kids in the room, so we can't really say. But if we're being honest, Al, how do you feel about you have a family member that's a kid. Your sister has a kid.

Yeah. You are more invested in that kid than anything else. Yeah. Does it change anything? No, absolutely not. more invested in that kid than anything else yeah it doesn't change anything no absolutely and i've told i've told her i'll never babysit until it could wipe its own ass and speak full sentences you're a monster yo i don't know if he's a monster it's just like i don't know what to do that i agree with this is a safety thing he's like yo listen i don't if it starts crying i'm assuming the worst that's probably what you're going to do.

Now I'm here in panic mode. Now you can't even enjoy your night out. You're going to the ballet. You're going to a movie or some shit like that. I'm calling you every five seconds because the kid's fucking crying. Get somebody to look after your kid. Let's have that conversation. Why parents don't care about who looks after their kid?

Because y'all don't love your kids. Parents don't love their kids. Arguing how much the babysitter costs i've seen parents haggle with a babysitter this is for your child this is supposed to be the most important thing in your life and they're like i'd like a raise from 12 or 13 i don't know if i can afford it it's your child this is the most important thing in your life whatever i ask to look after your fucking piece of shit should be okay with you once you trust that i'm not gonna fuck your kid i can ask whatever amount of money nah that's how these that's like a wedding vendor say what it's like a wedding vendor that's how they get you they

go oh this thing's really important you know you only get one and then they ruin you yeah and we pay no you can't get got this is what's crazy you know how fucked up parents are this how fucked up parents are parents spend five thousand kids. You know how fucked up parents are? This is how fucked up parents are. Parents spend $5,000 for one person to take a picture of their wedding, and when a 16-year-old goes, can I have $12.50 now? They go, I can't afford it. No, I agree with that. I can't possibly. Where am I going to get that 50 cents extra so you don't fuck my kid?

Yeah. That's what, you're literally paying a tax to not have your kid fucked, and you won't bump up the price. You go on this, no, I'm sorry. I'd rather my kid maybe get fucked. That's what you have. As a parent, you are saying when your babysitter

asked for more money and you say no, you're saying I'd rather my kid maybe get fucked. It's crazy. You're disgusting as a parent. You're trying to get babysitters for dog walker prices.

Dog walker prices. You pay more money. More money to have your dog walk for half an hour than your kid supervised for the whole day, you scumbag. Crazy. Monumental scumbag parents, $15 an hour. Oh, my God, I can never pay that.

How much would you pay for your kid not to get fucked? That's what the babysitting service should be. It's not babysitting. It's guarantee your kid don't get fucked. How much did you pay an hour then? $12.50. Wait, what? How am I going to pay more than $12.50,

bro? Come on, man. We have $15. I would pay $20 an hour if it's guaranteed my kid don't get fucked. So what? Say what? That's it? I pay $20 an hour. Guaranteed. $25? Get a woman, bro. How badly are they going to get fucked if it's a woman, it? I pay $20 an hour. Guaranteed. $25? Get a woman, bro.

How badly are they going to get fucked if it's a woman, dog? I'd never have a dude babysit the kid, but if it is a dude, I would pay probably up to $20 an hour for my kid to get babysat. You think they advertise that, like the babysitters? You would have a dude watch a kid? I would never. I would never have a dude. My parents had a dude watch me. How you think I got in there?

I found out that later. I had a motherfucker tell me he used to babysit me as a kid. And I was like, what? That's wild. It's wild. You got to sign the no fucking fee. Your parents ain't love you. Sorry.

How on earth are you going to let a man look after your kid? Even if the man is attached to God, they still fuck your kids. You want $20 for no fucking or $15 and it's up in the air? It's up in the air, bro. Think about this. Think about this. Think about this this the best of the best people literally a priest the closest you could be to god you can't even trust him with your kid how nuts is that yeah if there's any male nannies babysitters i'm looking at you a certain way i'm looking at your service like why would you even

choose to do that be trans yo go no i don't think the babysitting business should exist unless your parents are dead if you have parents that are alive okay why would you get a babysitter what if your parents got to work no you don't what if your parents grow up in the western hemisphere how do your parents got to work how old are they say what how old are they your parents yeah it was hypothetical 60s 70s you ain't figured it out by now what both you still gotta work y'all both still got jobs yeah get some bitcoin who's 60 years old with a two-year-old no if you're talking about grandparents if you if you have kids and your parents are alive all my grandparents are dead that's what i'm saying that's the only reason i can understand a babysitter if you're you got kids and your parents are alive. All my grandparents are dead. That's what I'm saying. That's the only reason I can understand a babysitter. If you got kids and your parents, the kids' grandparents are alive, you should not have

a babysitter ever. Yo, son, grandparents are old as fuck. If I have kids right now, I can't leave my baby with my dad. My dad going to be introducing himself to the baby every five minutes. The baby going to be on his lap. He going to be, who the fuck are you? Hey, what is peekaboo? The baby going to be playing peekaboo with my dad. They're both babysitting each other. It's going to be like, who the fuck are you? Hey, what is peek-a-boo? The baby's going to be playing peek-a-boo with my dad.

They're both babysitting each other. It's fine. They're both babysitting each other. Peeing on each other and shit. Come on, bro. That's a friend. If someone pees, I don't know. Was it you?

Was it me? That's a friend. It might be a friend, but still, it's dangerous, bro. That's bonding time, dog. That's dangerous. You wild. You got both grandparents, too? My cousin would leave his kid with his grandparents.

He'd come home, kid's shit all over him fucking self. Dad's still watching Jeopardy on the goddamn TV. Did he get molested? No, he didn't get molested, but he got shit all over his ass. That's what babies have. They got shit all over their ass. Yeah, you just sometimes have shit on your ass. Maybe you're right about that, but still.

Babysitting, I understand, is a profession, but highly underpaid is unbelievable that parents would negotiate. This would go back to your other point, though. What? Because you said. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. I just figured it out. That's why we have Caribbean babysitters.

Okay. Keep going. Molestation doesn't exist in our culture. Oh, shit. That's true. Wait, why not? You get a Jamaican nanny or something like that, they're not molesting in their culture. Why don't Jama make us molest

there's no time they dance they do daggers you know who's got time as a babysitter rape is not in that culture yeah no like it might be but they punish that or they punish rape with death bro they punish rape with it but it still is just different like this is product of like western bullshit i really do believe it's probably like weird like this like psychosis that leads you into doing this like a serial killer or a serial rapist or molesting kids and shit like that shit don't exist in the third world as much yo you have to go third world with the people look after your kids they're more wholesome they're more human we've like we're one step away from humanity we're like a little ai or something like that it's there's too much comfort there's too much extra

time they call them creature comforts because it turns you into a creature. Fucking creature. That's a fact. Yeah, you can't go first world with your babysitter, bro. I would never go first world with my babysitter. If she's white, you gotta be Eastern. And who would want a fucking Russian nanny? Yeah, we want your kid to have love, right? Latin, Latin, Latin. You go Latin, Latin,

Latin, Filipino, Jamaican, Caribbean, something like that. Something with a culture of love, kindness, warmth. You walk in, there's Jamaican, Caribbean, something like that. Something with a culture of love, kindness, warmth. You walk in, there's music going, the kids learn how to dance and shit like that. How the fuck you think I learned how to dance? Well, my parents didn't have a dance school. But outside of the dance school, I was raised by Latins. Dykes.

I was raised by Latin dykes. Perfect. Come on, yo. Perfect. Latin dykes, bro? No interest in you. No interest in me at all. How smart of that. How smart were my yo. Perfect. Latin dykes, bro? No interest in you. No interest in me at all. How smart of that.

How smart were my parents? Perfect. You get the love of the Latin culture and the dyke. So now they're not trying to rape me. They was trying to wear some of my clothes and shit. Motherfuckers was trying to sneeze into my oshkosh bagosh. I do see where you got your sense of style. 100%.

I'm a dyke. I get it now. I get it. I really do. I look like best case scenario Miles right now. But for real, that is very important that we acknowledge. That's a good point.

So you would let any Latin raise your kid? Not any Latin. Puerto Rican? Female Latin. Female Puerto Rican. Ideally homosexual. Ideally homosexual. Gay female Latin. Bull Rican. Female Latin. Female Puerto Rican. Ideally homosexual. Ideally homosexual. Gay female Latin. Bulldyke. Latin bulldyke.

Any Latin. Latin bulldyke. I'll let you do it. African. Yep. Yep. South African. Nope.

White South African? No. White South African or black South African? White South African. Real South African. White South African? No. Russian? African or black South African? White South African. Real South African. White South African? No. Russian?

No. Ukrainian? No. German? Get the fuck out of here, German. No. All those Swedish people who get an au pair, they're just fucking them. Let's be honest.

You're just fucking them. Why are we acting like it's anything else? The dad is just fucking them. Yeah, the dad is just... You're basically importing pussy so that you can fuck it and you're making her take care of your kid as well yeah like that's kind of crazy that's basically just a wife at that point yeah yeah you're supposed to just be doing that with your wife like why do wives allow this like what is wrong with the wife like you're it's almost arrogance i'm sorry if your husband fucks the au pair that's on you that's on you you were too stupid to recognize what was going on he literally

said to you hey why don't we fly in some 19 year old pussy from norway and then maybe they'll just look after our kid as if norwegians are like the ideal child care uh what to go culture in the world it's non-stop suicide over there why would you let them raise your kids because you want to Norwegians are like the ideal childcare culture in the world. It's nonstop suicide over there. Why would you let them raise your kids? Because you want to pound Nordic pussy. That's why. And also you're watching this girl love your kid, take care of your kid.

You're not going to get more attracted to her? Oh, look at this maternal. She's such strong maternal instincts, this girl. I should be with her. Not the woman that actually gave birth to them and wants nothing to do with them. It is mind boggling that any wife would be okay with this. I bet you it's because

the wife is like, yo, I don't really want to raise this kid, so let's get someone else to do it. And they go, the trade off of me not having to raise your kid is that you get to fuck

the new person that does it. Yo. That's even Stevens, honestly. Can we talk about that? Let's have this conversation. Let's have this conversation. Because if, let's say I hired somebody to pay for all the things. I know this is a Chris Rock joke.

He says this is like, I can't pay someone to pay for shit. But let's say I hired somebody who paid all the bills, did all the work, did all the stuff around the house. And then my wife started being attracted to that motherfucker that was like doing my role yep i can't be shocked yep so if we're hiring someone to do all the money i would i would say to your face if my friend came to me with that i'd be like you brought this shit on yourself you the fuck did you think was gonna happen oh my god you lost everything about you that she was attracted to unless somebody became a social. You became a social cuck. You became a social cuck. Yeah. She just did all... Some guy's doing all your shit. All your whole job.

Yo, this is real, bro. I believe in having one of them nannies that wakes up with the baby in the middle of the night. Night nurse. Night nurse. Because I'm asleep. So I don't notice that I want to cheat on you yet. And his dog you can't see her. Exactly. I don't know who's taking care

of the baby. I'm asleep. All I know is that the baby didn't wake up, right? But if you let that bitch do it during the day, Arnold Schwarzenegger smashed the nanny, did he not? I never, the people that are surprised that the guy fucked the nanny, I'm like, why? What makes you think this was... You ever seen the show The Nanny, bro? Fran was mad.

What was that? The Nanny. Fran Drescher. Fran Drescher was mad. And you know she was getting stroked. Yeah. Her voice was so hoarse. She was just getting throated by the pops the whole time. The show ends. I think they get married. No, they don't.

I think so. Oh, because his wife died. Yeah. Oh, yeah. So he married to help. If that ain't Me Too. That's Me Too right there. The whole show is Me Too.

All Me Too is is just doing it efficiently. But the efficient way, the truffle way is you've got a housekeeper. It's the most Indian take of all time. Rape is more efficient. That's the most Indian take of all time. No, it's marry the person close by. You died. Hey, sister, you're right here.

Let's do it. Good ass point. Good ass point. What's up about marriage me too, guys? I'm a respectable human. That's fair. That's fair. Wait a minute. We were just on to something though. What was point. What about marriage me too, guys? I'm a respectable human. That's fair. That's fair. Wait, we were just on to something though.

What was it? What were you saying? No, I was saying like the way they do it in LA, it's like you got a housekeeper and then they can watch the kids too. So it's two for one. Honestly. Yeah.

Maybe not the safest thing sometimes, but you know what? Clean house. Hold on. Hold on. Hold on. Hold on. Hold on.

There is something to this okay this is gonna sound foul but just roll just roll with me on it i'm rolling you have a kid right after you have a kid obviously you're recovering from this baby yeah okay your body is not the same. You are not feeling sexy. We're not even having sex because you have to recover from this baby. But I am 100% faithful to you and more in love with you than I've ever been in my life

because I'm watching you literally squeeze life into this child, feeding off of your bosom. You are taking care of it, nourishing it, connecting with our child. True hero. You are here. I've never been so in love with anything in my entire life. Seeing you breathe life into our child.

If you're not the person doing that, you're a fat bitch right yeah i mean maybe i'm crazy for saying that but like if you're not the person that's breastfeeding the baby taking care of the baby breathing life into the baby nurturing that baby we hiring somebody else to do it you just out of shape i did not know where that was going. It got me. But I mean, maybe I'm wrong, but like. You got a point. Go, go. The only out they'll have is if they're like hitting the gym crazy to have that quick snapback. Okay. That's the only escape.

And I'm with you on that. But you better hurry up. You better hurry up. You better hurry up. Because we're TikTok. TikTok. Because speaking of TikTok, it's a lot of hoes I'm looking at on TikTok. Our nanny on TikTok, and I'm liking it.

No, but I'm with you on that. If she snaps back immediately, Emily Ratatouille got back immediately. Yeah, she did. Okay? She back immediately. So her husband can't be like, yo, you fell off. So even if she's not taking care of the kid, he looking at his wife like, oh my gosh, she's still one of the baddest on the planet.

Yeah, yeah, yeah yeah yeah but if you don't get it right back and you letting someone else do all the motherly thing i'm not looking at you with all this uh with like the rose colored glasses whatever it was i was looking at you during the pregnancy i was like how you are doing you're breathing life into you got the the glow our child is inside you yeah but i think and i don't know because I don't have kids yet but I imagine we should talk to someone who has kids. When you see your wife nurturing your child your love goes to another level.

And it better not be a dude nanny during those first days. I might go dead. That'll cross your wire. Yo, that's true. Are we crazy for saying that or is that making sense making some sense we got it we just making some sense if your husband fucks the au pair even stevens but also some random chick like some nanny can't breastfeed your kid for you you have to get like a wet nurse

and why are they always why are they dairy cow ass bitches? Why are they like that? How the fuck they got milk in their titties? That's a great question. They just keep it running. What do you mean they keep it... Bring a nurse that's always aroused and shit like that? Why do you have a wet nurse?

You got hard nipples dripping? You gonna walk into the... You gonna walk into my living room dripping? White t-shirt? Sudsing it up? Oh my God, bro. That's foul. Don't't get one of them i don't really think they do wet nurses but what is a wet nurse they just always are breastfeeding so they're always keeping milk going yeah basically they're dairy cows yeah basically oh my goodness bro

well anyway i cause or mark or me one of us is going to experience this within the next couple of years. Right? Yeah. Now, here's the thing, though. If and when I have a kid and you want to hang out, you're going to force me to get a babysitter. No. I'm just going to tell you, hey, come hang out with me and the kid.

Is it that hard? Is it that hard to say, hey, do you want to not have fun and be with me together? And I'll go, sure. You want to soak up how cute this kid is? I already not having that much fun i'll have not fun with you is it different than a dog say what what if you invite me over and you got the dog i'll be honest sometimes i'll be like yo babe we're not doing this with the dog right now like i want to hang out with just you i don't want us to be saying sit down stay the whole fucking time i want to have a conversation with you so we put the dog away a hundred percent i do that with the dog

like for example if we're if we're gonna have dinner and i don't want to be a conversation with you. So we put the dog away. A hundred percent. I do that with the dog. Like for example, if we're, if we're going to have dinner and I don't want to be bothered by a dog, I want to sit down and connect with you. We put the dog away. Are you going to do that when you have a kid? Say what? Are you going to do that when you have a kid?

When I have a kid, it's over. It's over. I'm not talking to my girl no more. Everything I say to you is through the kid. Everything is through the kid. Like I don't even need to speak directly through you. Mommy's really running up the credit card. Yes, she is. That's Like I don't even need to speak Directly through you Mommy's really running up

The credit card Yes she is Yes she is Mommy ain't gave daddy No pussy lately You know what I'm saying Mommy ain't giving daddy No pussy lately

Mommy ain't giving daddy No pussy lately You know what I'm saying Baby either bobbing his head Like Yeah His first words Gonna be blue balls

Or something Blue balls Mommy giving daddy A lot of blue balls You know what I'm saying Daddy going on the road soon So Mommy should probably Be giving daddy a lot of blue balls. You know what I'm saying? Daddy going on the road soon. So mommy should probably be giving daddy some pussy soon.

I don't know. I would be a smart thing. But you understand what I'm saying. If you make me get a babysitter, you gotta pay half. I will pay full. But it's an expensive rate because I'm getting the no fucking fee. Say what? I'm getting the no fucking feet say what i'm getting

the no fucking you don't understand i'm gonna spring you don't understand you understand i would gladly pay that okay i would gladly pay that i'm a hundred percent like i'll pay to have my dog boarded for a night if i want to have a good night with my girl 100 in a heartbeat i would do that it's worth it i value more than anything on this planet, human interaction. I built an entire career around it. Person to person, human interaction. Love it. We're laughing.

We're crying. Whatever the fuck it is. You got something really traumatic going on in your life you want to talk to me about? Let's go. It's amazing. This is what people usually watch TV for. I'm so fortunate. I'm around all these interesting motherfuckers in my life, and I get the real thing.

Your life's a TV novella. It's a novella. I'm living in a fucking novella okay if i want to have a tragic comedy i talk to dove okay i do i do you want to listen to a serial killer podcast talk to them i listen to a serial i talk to dove okay i do that shit it's a real thing i have all these different characters in my life if i want to listen to an abused husband that got no say in what anything and you know just slowly grinded away i just spent some time myself nah but you gotta tell them about that guest appearance that happened on a plane all right and we're back uh what we're about to say? You were about to tell us about the time you were very cool, calm, and collected on the airplane. No.

Okay, let Al tell. This is a shared experience. Al can tell the story. Set the table. I'll set the table. We're flying to Orlando. First class, no big deal. No big deal.

Shows were fire, by the way. It's really no big deal. It's really no big deal. All you guys were there? Yeah. We were already there. Mark was already there because he's from orlando uh probably didn't fly first class but alex and i were flying first class okay i was economy plus i was economy plus that's awesome

hey bro you got a whole plus that's what i'm saying awesome bro that's really cool i had a cliff bar did you get a cliff bar sorry sorry we was drinking champagne don't call that shit no bar either that's a cliff i know bite so small of you and nibble. All right. So we're in first class. It's no big deal, right? I'm in second row. Right.

Al's seat. Right. Al's in first row, window seat. Okay. So I could see Al through the little space in between the seats. Mark, in first class, there's more space between the seats. It's not as- Okay.

Let's keep- I'm editing that out. I'm editing that out. editing that for this much more that's getting edited yeah so uh i can see a little bit through that sitting next to me is a small man wearing ripped jeans shorts okay he put a skateboard in the overhead bin that's it motherfucker didn't even bring luggage brought a skateboard okay okay probably of some arabic descent or something like that. He looked brown. I never seen a brown dude with a skateboard either. It was unbelievable. This kid is so rich, dude.

Maybe that's the case. Should have reported him, dude. That's sketchy. That's a good point. That was a very good point. The motherfucker doesn't even have luggage. He about to blow this plane up and land on a half pipe

and that's how he's going to survive. Okay? So, now, Alex, you can take it away. Okay. So, out of nowhere, I just... No, no just no no no no maybe I'll do a little bit maybe I'll do a little bit you're gonna say it better let me tell me okay and then I'm gonna let Al take over

nah just give him okay so I sit down right I'm gonna be honest with you I'm just gonna have an honest moment with you guys I'm not there's no cap it's nothing like that I pick my nose a lot I do pick my nose okay I've even thought that I pick my nose a lot I do pick my nose okay I've even thought that I've made it get bigger from doing that I've had that thought but I also have

a lot of irrational thoughts I have catastrophic thinking and that was just one thing to stretch it out though but I think I might stretch it people give women shit for having a bunch of sex like oh you gotta lose pussy I might have the loose pussy of nose yeah I do okay so I pick my nose and especially when it's early and I'm tired, when I it's early and I'm tired, I already probably don't notice how people are feeling in my surroundings. Yeah. Right. Like I kind of already operate spectrum.

Yeah. I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not spectrum, but I've just kind of ignore what's going on around me and how my behavior could affect, affect others. Right. I'm not saying I'm eating a lot of muscle or anything like that. I'm just saying like, sometimes I just kind of ignore what's going on around me and how my behavior could affect others.

I'm not saying I'm eating a lot of muscle or anything like that. I'm just saying sometimes I just don't pick up on things. Have you ever seen in football practice those things that they're like tackle dummies and they just go through life? That's me. The tackle dummy doesn't really know what's going on until Right. Until it gets brutally assaulted. Yeah. Right. So I'm, I'm sitting in C2 and I'm picking my nose and I'm fucking going for it, dog.

Like I picked a few, I picked a few, I'm balling, balling, balling, balling flick. Right. And,

um, there was one I was chasing and, and I kept going and pushing it further up. Oh no. And I'm up there with the pinky. I'm up there with the pointer. And at one point I went up with thumb and I got the the tail end of it and instead of pulling it back down i pushed it up further wow i went back in backside with the pointer finger hooked it got it down flicked

it right i'm like yes but also i'm thinking while i'm doing this i'm like man i'm really picking my fucking nose like your boy is out here right All of a sudden As I'm back there picking my nose I just hear Hey Come on stop picking and flicking your boogers everywhere Mad loud So loud

You're picking and flicking your boogers everywhere Right What are you doing Picking and flicking boogers everywhere right what are you doing picking boogers everywhere right and it happens and i'm so shocked that he could say it out loud and be this embarrassing to me that he would cause this much embarrassment i looked at him like joe button looked at the tranny in the dating show that he was on you know that shit like where he goes like this he just goes yeah yeah right so imagine you're him so i just look at him right yeah and i stare at him right and he keeps going he goes come on you're peaking your nose you're fleeking boogers everywhere peaking fleeking you sound like clive frazier son it was He's swishing and dishing. He's picking, flicking. It was unbelievable, right? So I look at him. He says it again.

And I look at him. I go, yo, you done? And he goes, you could also put your mask on. Kill him, bro. Bring him on the pod. This guy is a hero. Listen, listen, listen. I'm furious, right? bring him on the pot so I know this guy is a hero listen listen

I'm furious right that this guy could try to embarrass me publicly like this right he would say it this loud right

now in retrospect in retrospect so when I say this I'm furious the audacity of this guy this motherfucker

was audacious right so I say to him cause you know me I'm angry as fuck right so I say to him I go I go listen as long as I don't flick nothing on your side, keep your fucking mouth shut.

Keep in mind, keep in mind, we still on the ground. We haven't even taken off yet. We haven't lifted off the ground in New York. We still got three hours together On the flight Picking and flicking I turn back I put my mask on

I'm supposed to put my mask on I look up at the corner He cucked me a little bit on the mask Not a little bit On the mask he cucked me a little bit They gonna tell me to put the mask. Not a little bit. On the mask, he cucked me a little bit. Not a little bit. They ain't going to tell me to put the mask on anyway. No, but he told you.

Listen, listen. But he told you. I told him to shut his mouth. They didn't tell you. I told him to shut his mouth and he didn't open his mouth again. But you couldn't tell because he had his mask on. And you couldn't tell if you had your mouth open or not because your mask was on and you already won.

All I know is this, is when the waitress came over asking for water, I said, he's good. You ain't say that. Stop it. Stop it. Stop capping. Stop capping. The waitress said, he's good. You ain't saying that. Stop it. Stop it. Stop capping. Stop capping. The waitress said, you want some water? I took a bottle.

I said, he's good. And the waitress kept moving. He was asleep by himself? Say what? Yeah, he was asleep by himself. My man was riding wide awake. He reached for the water. I slapped his hand out the way.

I said, he's good. I said, he's 100% good. Al? No, no, no. He's capping. I was going gonna tell his side of the story so all all this happens is this this happens this right i turn back i put my mask on like that fucking audacious motherfucker to be saying i'm picking flicking my book now in the moment in the moment it did dawn on me yeah that the guy he reacted like um a human quickly like like like a person you know but he reacted he reacted yeah do you know what i mean and that reaction could only happen if i flicked something it might have hit him or got close so because he said he He said that, right?

Now, in the moment, I didn't assume that he was reacting to my boogers getting closer to him or some shit. But when I ball up and flick, I'm not aiming really. Like I'm trying to go straight. I wasn't trying to get his side. But sometimes when you ball and flick, it gets a little sticky and the trajectory goes to the side. So what I'm thinking is since he was wearing jean shorts, I flicked and that shit hit him on a calf or something.

And that's when he's like, hey, stop picking and flicking your boogers all over the place. Right? You know what I think might have happened?

What happened? He just knew he could boss you around and so he just didn't like the idea of what you were doing and he had to tell you how to behave. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

That might be the case. That's how things happen. I think it's more funny if I hit him with a booger, but that might be the case. So I think he reacted that way, and I couldn't fathom, oh shit, did that never turn on the whole bot?

No, it just went out. I think it might have happened, right? I think I couldn't fathom that he would do it, but it might have been the case that one of the boogers might have hit his leg almost. Yeah, right. Okay? If I had known that, I probably would have apologized and that kind of shit.

But I thought he was just getting upset at me flicking boogers in my own space. And it's like, that's my space. I can flick whatever the fuck I want. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay? Yeah. I turned back straight after he cucked me or whatever. I told him to shut his mouth.

He didn't do shit. Little ass motherfucker. At the end of the flight, motherfucker stood up. What else is there to say? You could also put your mask on. That's where he flips into being a fucking full fledged hero is the double down

cause you could've whooped his ass son maybe maybe now I don't know based on this story my man has spirit dog son

my man he ain't flying spirit he first class in delta but he has spirit he didn't keep talking I said shut your mouth he didn't talk the rest of the flight son

his TV name ain't work he didn't keep talking. I said, shut your mouth. He didn't talk the rest of the flight. Yeah, but he said what he needed to say. His TV didn't even work. He didn't even tell the fucking flight attendant or whatever. Everybody's TV wasn't working. Everybody was just patting the TV. I know everybody's didn't, but it made me super happy to see him just pointing at the fucking TV the whole time. Didn't dare open his mouth. Didn't dare open his mouth.

Didn't ask for a little. You know what that sounds like to me? He's a very reasonable guy. Yep. He's way more reasonable to me. Or maybe he was just more intimidated by the sky waitress than he was you. Maybe that's a possibility. Point is, I'm trying to get to this Al part.

Okay. I turn back around. I put my mask on, right? And I'm feeling pretty good about myself. I feel like I told that motherfucker to shut his goddamn mouth. Okay? I see. At this moment, I don't think anybody heard because airplanes are kind of loud.

You know what I mean? I'm like, maybe nobody heard or nothing like that. Right. I look through the gap in the seats, which is quite significant because first class mark. And I just see this Gapson's comfort plug. I just see Al. I just see Al's shoulders like this. And he's his head is like stuck in between his shoulders.

And he's just laughing. And I'm like, is he laughing at me? I look, I'm going, Al. And I go, Al, did you hear what just happened and Al just starts fucking losing it to the point where we're both

laughing out loud there's a gay guy sitting next to Al he's like I'll have what they're having it's boogers motherfucker you don't want this

and I didn't have the heart to tell the motherfucker you have me motherfucker I've been flicking boogers on the back of your head this entire time we were on a tarmac. So Al is laughing so hard he gets up and uses the restroom. I'm in tears.

Snot's coming down my nose. Like, it was bad. So I had to get out of there because it wouldn't stop. That was the funniest interaction I've ever heard on a plane. And I saw some of it. But it's more funny for this reason. Al didn't hear the part where I told the dude he gotta shut his mouth. All he heard was

me go, you done? And the dude goes, well you can put your mask on and then me just turn straight put my mask on and not say a single thing the rest of the play. Which is way funnier if that's how it happened. I thought this motherfucker just got cucked

so crazy. He still did kind of get cucked up. Even with the response. You changed the whole dynamic of the interaction by saying shut your mouth. He addressed you at level four octaves and you addressed him back at negative two. You're like, you could shut up. I hear your reply, but I heard him.

I went psycho on him. I went psycho on him. And that was one thing I regretted. I did not regret saying, are you done? Because I need a little more time to think about what I was going to say. Okay, okay. And then I was so caught off guard. The motherfucker called me while I'm balling up a booger.

I got a booger in between these two fingers. But why do you think there's no people around when you're on a plane? The motherfucker called me while I'm balling up a booger. I got a booger in between these two fingers. But why do you think there's no people around when you're on a plane? So I was texting out my girl. I was fucking tight. I had my girl. I was like, yo, this motherfucker had the audacity to say publicly, stop picking and flicking your boogers. And my girl was like, yo, you picking your nose publicly.

Like you brought on this energy. Isn't that shit the worst? We try to get validation. They don't back you up. You're supposed you know what i mean hello she's on the side of right now i guess i love this guy are you done so funny here's where here's where you shut your mouth is useless yeah he said are you done and he was like no i got one more thing to say yeah then he said it and now he's done i got nothing else to say now you know what i was gonna do and you did it you should have kept the mask down the entire flight. But you can't.

They come up and tell you to put the mask down. It wasn't down up until that point. Up until the point he told you to put that fucking mask down. That's the reason why I wasn't because I had to pick my nose. I had to pick my nose for the mask to fucking fully on. So. Oh, that was so good, guys. I wish you were there.

It was so fucking good. Hold on one second. God did that for me. I had a front row seat to that shit. Hey, Besh.h hey what's up is it possible to do a wedding for 50 000 oh my goodness you're hitting me with that um all right i'll call you back you're on you're you're on the podcast right now by the way oh very cool um for how many people well you know i'll put 100 in there probably not fuck fuck okay i'll call you back and you'll find a way to spend all my money love you okay love you too bye bye okay that's bad news that's good that's our wedding planner i went to

i went to uh college with her oh that's uh uh sarah bes our wedding planner. I went to college with her. Oh, that's Sarah Besharati. Do you remember her? Yeah, she does big ass weddings. Yeah, I know. She's like a beast with it. Yo, check out Besharati group. I think they're the ones that do the weddings. She's amazing. And if you got big budgets,

holler at her. And if you want a bitch to keep your deposit for no reason, holler at Cinderella Brides in New Jersey. I mean, what did Cinderella do? She kept our motherfucking money. Yeah. Kept that fucking sandal too, right? Yeah.

Hey, she kept the deposit. She kept 50% of them sandals, yo. If you go with this bitch, you finna turn into a pumpkin on your wedding day. Yo, real talk. She Cinderella'd you. She did, yo. I got God. I should have known it's in the name.

Holy shit. That's how you know it's a good idea. God. I should have known it's in the name. Holy shit. That's how you know it's a good idea. God. This just came up out of nowhere? You guys should be using just fans that just for every single thing. Flagrant catering. Flagrant makeup. Flagrant chauffeurs.

Yo, holler. Reach out. Holler. Reach out. I'm reaching out right now. Holler. It's not too late. Flagrant personal trainers.

Yo, we need flagrant personal trainers. Yes, please. For real. Yo, shout out to the muscle doc. Had us looking cute. I haven't taken a shit in a week since I left, bro. He's trying to put me in touch with a dude in New York. I'll see if he can get you.

What is it? What is it? I already forgot what we were talking about. What was it? Personal trainers. Oh, that's what we were talking about? Hey, bro. Hey, bro.

Hey, bro. Are you done, bro? Are you done? You got anything else to say? You got anything else to say? You got anything else to say? Motherfucker, too, if you put my mask on. Fucking piece of shit. And I was ready on this podcast to apologize to him.

I was going to go right to camera and go, yo, my bad, son. He don't need your apology. He won. He won. When does the winner need an apology? Fuck you. Yo, fuck you from the bottom of my heart, bitch. Little skateboarding ass bitch.

Hey. If I see you on first class again, it's on sight. I'm smashing your head into the window, and I'm closing the window shit on your head for the whole three hours. Fuck you. I hope you're up for the Disney World. Bitch. I wish you had that energy on the blades.

I know. I know. I know. Fuck you then. It's like the guy who's trying to get into, he's not trying to fight. He's like, yo, hold me back. Don't hold me back. Don't hold me back.

That's me in the shower after every altercation I have in the street that doesn't end in violence. I'm in the shower that night. I will suck my dick then, man. Suck my dick then you gonna honk at me in the street like that? Fuck you then, bitch. Hop out your car, hoe. Hop out your car. Hop out your car then, bitch. You wanna hop out your car, I'll Hop out your car. Hop out your car, that bitch.

You want to hop out your car, I'll slap the shit out of you. Oh, shit. I almost slipped in a goddamn shower and killed myself. Your girl's like, Andrew, what's up today? I got to shower. Son, I be going through fights in the shower, bro. I done knocked so many people out in the shower, bro. Yo, I would hate to be a conditioner bottle in your shower, bro.

Yo, can I be completely honest with you? Sandusky would be scared to conditioner bottle in your shower, bro. Yo, can I be completely honest with you? Sandusky would be scared to join me in the shower. Sandusky would think he was about to come in there and get this ass, and he's just going to hear me in there like, all right, then you think you're going to take my starting spot in the middle school football team? Fuck you, bitch. Oh, God.

All right, let's hit these facts and feelings. All right, facts and feelings. All right. Feelings, no facts. All right, feelings, no facts. Let's do facts, no facts. All right, feelings, no facts. Let's do facts, no feelings for one day. Okay. All right, feelings, no facts.

All right, part of the show where it's only feelings, no facts. I swear to God, that motherfucker, if I see him skateboarding down the street, I swear to God. Did he really get me, dawg? He got you, dawg. He got you, son. Son, when someone says, are you done to try to intimidate you, and then you're not done, you won. You won. If you didn't beat his ass on that plane, he won.

You said, and you're bigger. I'm assuming you're bigger. I ain't letting him have no pretzels. I ain't letting him have no pretzels the whole flight. I said to the waitress, I said, come here, bitch. I said, listen, he good. He don't want nothing, bro. He don't want you.

You hungry? Why don't you pick some of that boogers I've been picking up? Yo, you probably needed the water because your mouth was dry being afraid of this motherfucker. Son, my mouth was mad dry, son. Because he was afraid of my man. I took a big ass gulp of water, son. Masked down. Son, son.

He said nothing, pussy. He said nothing when I was taking my big ass gulps of water. Listening to my music mad loud, tapping hella shit. He really got me, bro. Yo, are you done? That shit is legendary. That shit is legendary. He said, are you done?

He hit you with a bird man, son. You finished or you done? He really hit me with a fucking bird man, son. How he bird man me? Oh, man. God damn it. That's the worst part. First of all, he yelled at you.

And then all you said is, are you done yelling at me? Hey, now. Hey, man. God damn it. That's the worst part. First of all, he yelled at you, and then all you said is, are you done yelling at me? Hey, now. Hey, now. Hey, now. I didn't say it like that. Hey, now. I didn't say it like that. I said it more tough.

I said it more tough. Excuse me, sir. I said it more tough enough because I didn't hear it. It was not tough. I was curious. I conveniently only heard what the motherfucker said to me. I said, I was looking. No, I saw you not looking because I looked specific.

I saw how bad you were looking at this guy. You were angry. I looked specific because I thought you were going to have my back. You didn't have shit. You were scared. I ain't picking my nose. You know he did this out of fucking scared. I got home training.

No, you were scared. Get the fuck out of here. You were so scared. I'm not taking that back. My man sounds scary. Second confrontation happened, that motherfucker took the parts of the seat to bend and bent that shit like this. Blinders, bro.

He took the blinders, created a little cocoon for himself so he didn't have to deal with none of that altercation. I told that shit myself. Motherfucker had a full skateboard. He had a weapon. Nah, I can't. Bro, weapon on the fucking point.

I can't back it when you're that far in the wrong, son. You're that far in the wrong. I wasn't in the wrong. I told him. Come on, son. I said, shut your mouth. You don't get no snacks. Nothing. Yo, if you want to bring NFTs back, Hold him. Come on, son. I said shut your mouth. You don't get no snacks.

Nothing. If you want to bring NFTs back, just NFT that whole interaction as he told it. I asked you to go for millions. I know one motherfucker going to buy it. He got money too. He in first class. He's so rich he didn't even bring clothes. We got bumped up. Can you tell people we're an upgrade?

We got bumped up. Yeah, dog. I bought my fucking piece of shit fuck that motherfucker fuck him fuck him till i die so are you fucking him till i there was part of me was like i hope this shit crashes because that's the only way you could stand up for yourself i hope this shit that's the only way you could have won is it both i'm gonna blame him i'm gonna blame him when he's screaming through his mask. On the way down, I'll be like, put your mask on, bitch. Put your fucking mask on, bitch. Fuck you. The worst part is that you thought you won.

Yeah, dog. That's crazy. So when I'm laughing at him, you thought we were laughing together. Yeah, it really hurt my feelings. I thought we was laughing together. I thought, oh, I'm laughing without the, ah, I just bitched this motherfucker, right? While we on the tarmac tarmac Schultz II out here shit you will get deliverance and the whole time he's laughing at me think I'm a bitch I

Told him shut your mouth. He didn't say a word for the rest of the flight didn't order water pretzels nothing Go to a kickflip bitch bitch. Yeah, that's what I said him. Yeah, So when we got the text from you You didn't know He thought I lost That was the funniest Interaction I've ever had Oh man Are you done My man didn't give no fucks He wasn't done

He was not He said as a matter of fact no You still gonna get this work that you were bringing it up fucking hell yeah thank you for allowing me to air my second grievance he really bought you were polite dog you were actually quite polite up top asking him if he was done is there anything else i could correct for you sir i pray that i got a booger on you if you're watching now i pray that i got your leg hair or something real talk i truly do pray i love this and you know what there's chance you know this is actually really kind of funny i'm not trying to say that i'm like a famous person but

i am you are i'm not trying to say i'm famous but i'm well known enough that there's somebody on that flight like, yo, that comedian that I watch their YouTube videos, yo, he was picking the fuck out of his nose on his flight. Right? Like that, like, and that guy might know that. And then he just said, are you done? That's all he said.

And then the guy wasn't done, yo. And he's supposed to be good with hecklers and shit. He's supposed to, like, know what to do when the audience gives him pushback. And he just crumbled. I don't know. I don't know. Which one's funnier? This situation or where the girl in Portland told you to take out your phone?

The girl in Portland, because she completely lobotomized me, bro. Yeah. That was a headshot, kill shot. When the bitch told me the shit, why I hate Portland. I asked her where a restaurant where there's some seating Oh, yeah, she said do you have a phone? I said, yes, you should try googling it now, but fuck that bitch Yeah, she's completely in the wrong. You know hippo Yo, hey, can't you actually she was not cute?

You guys You guys You guys are disgusting to me. You guys are disgusting to me. No, no, no. You disgust me. Yo, you done? Son, I'm an honest man.

Fuck that bitch. She's a loser. But that guy on the plane, that's a winner, dog. That's a champion. You know what he did to me, son? Y'all remember that viral video with the Indian where he goes, you do? Hugo? Hugo? He hit me with that shit, but I didn't slap him.

How can she slap? How can she slap? I should have hit him, bro. But then the flight don't get there. We don't get to do the shows in Orlando. Yeah, that's what it was. Worth it. Yo, what's up, guys?

First of all, we got to announce some dates. But first of all, thank you to everybody who came out in Phoenix. It was great. The turnout was great. Saturday, the first show, we made a fucking movie. We might actually put out a little bit of a movie. But upcoming dates, I'm at Bananas in Hasbrook Heights this weekend on Friday and Saturday. Kansas

City, the weekend after, June 17th through 19th at the Comedy Club of KC. July 1st through July 3rd San Diego. I'm at the American Comedy Club. And July 22nd through 24th Baltimore. I'm at Magubi's Joke House. The name is ridiculous but the shows are going to be lit. Come through.

AkashSingh.com. The Infamous Tour. Get your tickets right now if there are some left. TheAndrewShows.com. You know all the cities we're going to. We might be announcing left, the Andrew shows.com, you know, all the cities we're going to, we might be announcing a couple more soon. I'll let you guys know next week about that, but go get them right now.

Go get them right now while they're still available. I know the next few cities we're coming to a sold out. St. Louis sold out. I think San Antonio sold out, but there's a few tickets left in Dallas, Houston. Go,

go, go. Cause we're coming there right now. Don't wait too long because the tickets get crazy in these prices and buy them off my website. I keep telling you the Andrew Schultz dot com. Okay, that's where the tickets are. They're between 55 and 75

bucks. If you're spending $1,000 on tickets, $450 on tickets, you're getting raped by these scalpers. Don't let the scalpers get you. Get them from my website. I'm telling you, this is for you we love you we appreciate you now let's get back all right feelings no facts we're just going quick all right we're going quick drake bell's out here talking to kids i get it who else gonna know this

motherfucker yeah who does know what do you mean like i don't know about him i never watched that show you never watched drake and josh no no no generation None of you guys watch Drake and Josh? That show is fire. Did you ever watch Hey Dude? Did you ever watch Saved by the Bell? Yeah, we watched Hey Dude. We watched Saved by the Bell. I did a TV show with him. One of those MTV shows.

We got to make fun of him. Yeah. I don't understand no Spongebob references. I don't understand none of that. I see all these memes come up with Spongebob. I don't get it. What do you know about Darkwing Duck? Darkwing Duck was lit.

Let's get dangerous. Darkwing Duck. That's it. You don't get any Spongebob references? What? You don't get any Spongebob references? No. I made Spongebob references to you guys.

You know how you know China won? I don't want to give this up. I don't want to give this up, but you know how China won? Like, all of our cartoons when we were younger had to do with ducks, right? Like, Darkwing Duck, Gravity Duck, all these duck tales, every single fucking thing is duck. And these Chinese, say what? Is this a bit? This is not a bit at all.

I'm just thinking about it right now. And Chinese people, during the heyday of ducks, was hanging ducks in the fucking window and made them ducks so goddamn delicious we were like, we don't need no more duck cartoons. Eat them motherfuckers. Fuck Donald. Ducks is gone. You don't see ducks doing nothing anymore. Affleck, that's all we got.

They got corporate jobs. They went corporate. It's unbelievable. Wow, bro. The Mighty Ducks. Did you guys watch that? They brought that back. It's a series now. bro. The Mighty Ducks. Did you guys watch that? Hell yeah, we watched Mighty Ducks. They brought that back. It's a series now.

They made it an actual team. Yeah. They made an actual hockey team, the Mighty Ducks, after the movie. Yeah. Oh, that's fire. Remember Tailspin? Oh, it's fire, dog. Go, Jack.

Feeling notes, facts. Go. The thing that I wonder about with Drake Bell is if you get famous when you're 15 and your audience is 15, is it possible there's something that happens in your brain that makes you stuck? No. No way? All these Mickey Mouse kids seem like they got mad issues. They're all off. They got issues, but they're not

fucking kids. You can't be made a pedophile by being famous at 15. No, no, no. He was saying like, does that brain stay at 15? Like something happens. You're not necessarily always a pedophile, but you brain stay at 15? Like something happens. You're not necessarily always a pedophile, but you like stay at that age. I do believe it.

Like Macaulay Culkin kind of all. No, like the vampire shit. Like, you know how like if a vampire bites you, whatever age you are, you stay that age. Yeah. I do think that that is the case with like molestation. You know, like Michael Jackson and being famous. Not even fame. Or in the room with adults and young people.

But maybe you could argue, like, fame is like a version of molestation. I think so. Yeah, like they're abused in a way. Because what is molestation? You get your innocence stripped. Yeah, bro. You're fucking Olsen twins. They look like fucking gremlins.

But just because you stay young don't mean it means you want to fuck young people. That's the point. But he was just talking to this 15-year-old. He was just texting. You know, I did an episode of a TV show with that guy. Really? There was a show called Safe Word where celebrities were like

trying to dare each other to do shit. Oh, no. It's called Safe Word? Oh, no. Come on, Drake. Wow. Yeah.

Oh, no. I'm saying. He was on it, but that motherfucker stayed using his safe word, which, you know. I get it. You would think you would

do that for your victims. Holy shit. I got the whole audience to boo him. Really? Because you wouldn't do shit. The whole point is like you're just daring each other

to do these crazy things and tweet these crazy yo you gotta post that video MTV cut it cause obviously they don't know how to be funny but I was just in like the panel

and they would just have us there to make comments and when he I was like yo everybody boo this motherfucker and the whole audience started booing him

it was great in retrospect we should air it the guy deserves it yeah you gotta get that clip yeah you gotta hit up did you get any like uh weird vibes from i was no i just thought he was like an he was an awkward looking guy and i was like oh he was probably like the shit when he was younger and now it's probably a tough adjustment because you're not what exactly was he doing

so the crime is that he was messaging a 15-year-old. And they haven't released the messages, but they were allegedly sexual in nature. So he's sexually talking to these kids. If you're doing that on text, you've done crazy shit. And his ex accused him of abuse and all sorts of crazy shit. Apparently she moved in with him when she was like 17 or something. The guy's got a rap sheet of issues. Did he start abusing her when she turned 18.

Maybe. I don't know. So maybe that's OK. I was saying like when she she became an attractor. Yeah. She got up. He was pissed. He was done.

OK. What else we got? All right. Anonymous is threatening Elon Musk. Yeah. Yeah. Listen, you're a billionaire. Like he's the most beloved billionaire. Like for some reason he gets away without any smoke.

Motherfucker is. And maybe he's, you know, figure out exactly how to do it, but he gets no smoke at all. He's almost like he's almost like unanimously loved. Yeah. And that shouldn't be the case. I was like, you get successful. You become successful you become a billionaire you gonna get some hate It's okay. It's part of it anonymous. It just sounds mad cuz the fucking Bitcoin prices down. Yeah I don't hate Elon. I just I see him for what he's just a character. He's playing a character Yeah, I think he's gonna make all of our lives better. So I let him rock They try to say he didn't start Tesla.

He bought that shit off of somebody. Who cares? I mean. Yeah, he always tried to discredit the inventor. This guy, Edison, didn't make the light bulb. We got light. That's the most Tesla shit ever, though, isn't it? What, get someone else to do it?

Yeah, Elon Musk was like. Self-make the business? Yeah, he's like, yo, I'm just going to buy some shit that's already popping. Yeah. Make it more popping. Have Tesla got ripped off? Yeah. Oh, because Tesla got ripped off? Oh cause Tesla got ripped off Oh I thought you were saying

Yeah I thought you were saying self driving car And he's like he did the same shit with the business Yeah The business will also make itself Self driving business Did that shit go off again? What's going on with that? I don't know it's fucking haunted I think

Anyway yeah I don't know it's weird But um you I think. Anyway. Yeah, I don't know. It's weird. But you're going to get some smoke. It is what it is. The crazy thing was what you were saying about his wife, Grimes, what she tweeted. Or you were saying. Oh, yeah. She put out a TikTok.

What did she say? Basically, she was saying that AI, that communists need to embrace AI. And she was saying how so many of her communist friends don't like AI for whatever reason. But actually, AI is the most effective way to get us towards a communist state that's true now that doesn't mean that she's a communist not necessarily but she's saying communists need to get on board yeah which actually i don't disagree with if you are a communist yeah no but if you're a communist that is what's gonna ai will do all the work and they'll just have to supplement everybody's income and then essentially we're all kind of the same because the issue with communism is that you have to have people force farming and you're forcing

people to get out there and start doing shit that they might not want to do but you got to have the village farm but if you got ai that's able to farm for you do all your shit for you yeah then it's actually the fastest approach to getting a communist state in the philosophical sense. This is the universal basic income pitch. Yeah. Right? It's like everybody gets enough to make a living and survive, and then you can spend your time doing the things you actually love. Yeah.

And it sounds good in theory, but... I don't think it will work. But it is going to be tricky when AI can do everything better than us. Yeah. It's also tough to take this sort of sort of like comrade like marxist approach to grimes who's the person that married literally like the mayor of capitalism i don't think she's the biggest communist in the world yeah yeah is she hot what does she look like no apparently not she's not do you think that's like on do you think he's doing that on purpose

like i'm i'm just wondering how calculated he is like his every decision he's making about his likability like successful dudes with ugly wives are immediately likable yeah but they also named the baby like fucking alpha graphic right archangel whatever yeah which is i guess a little annoying but like oh she's like goth kind of yeah she's a scene like she's got she's got a vibe but he was with amber heard it was a smoke show but yeah but then he was like no this is unlikable if i have i'm a billionaire and i have like a vibe. But he was with Amber Heard. It was a smoke show. But then he was like, no, this is unlikable. If I'm a billionaire and I have a smoke show wife, people are going to hate me. If I'm a billionaire and I have a weirdo wife,

if he's on the spectrum, I think he says he is on the spectrum, it's not like he has that deep emotional capacity. He's like, what functions best? No, he does have emotional capacity. If you're autistic. You think? Yeah.

You just aren't picking up on social cues and how to relate to people. But you still feel. It just shows she's into all the stuff that he's talking about. Like, she's an alien, so he's dating someone. Yeah. To me, that seems closer. I'm just trying to say, like, maybe he's very calculated in the decisions that he's making. That's probably true.

And it seems too much to do. I'm going to have a baby with this kid. But we've seen weirder things before. I can't imagine he's marrying someone without calculating. If he's calculating every other facet of his life. Yes. There's a calculation. I don't know what the calculation is.

Tom Cruise marries fucking Katie Holmes in like an organized wedding. Yeah. They have a child together. They found her. Yeah. To marry him. It's like unbelievable things that people do and he's not even close to as successful as elon musk so maybe elon is doing

this thing to create this moat around him a moat of likability so i'm gonna sell all my houses so i don't have any possessions so people can't go he's the rich guy with all these houses how can i make myself um avoid as much criticism as possible i don't have amber heard the pin-up wife. I got this weirdo chick over here That's kind of likable of me, right? Like everything that he's doing is based on likeability because the more people like him the more that he can manipulate the market Yeah, if he has some people hate him and some people like him then you have the Trump effect now You're at war constantly. Yeah, but the majority of people fuck with you and they're gonna do what you want to do You're a dictator with approval rating at 90%.

You can get a lot of shit done. And that's what I guess we're seeing him do. You're getting a lot of shit done. It's very interesting. I'm curious about when the reckoning will come for Elon. Yeah. They're going to find something. It's starting.

This is the beginning, I think. You think? It's the beginning of this. Relax, guys. There's nothing to hold on to. It's the beginning of this. Tesla stock. I know. Tesla stock. Plaid mode comes out this week what's that it's the the new tesla mode but it's dumb whatever the name is 60 in 1.1 seconds under two i don't know what the number is

but this car will dust anything on the road the range is 520 miles. It's the Model S upgrade. The Model S. So a sedan that's faster than any Ferrari that's on the road right now. That's crazy. Insanity. And they changed the steering wheel. Or you have to get the actual physical upgrade as well. I think it's the car. It's the new model. You probably need all new stuff to

handle it. So you basically have a spaceship. Let's pay respect to our boy, Elon. No, no, no. There's no question. He's a smooth a smooth operator the guy's doing it but he's got some weird things going on but maybe he's doing it it's it's both things can be true he could be the greatest inventor of our lifetime he could change the way everybody does everything and he could be a fucking weirdo who you know is just like a character and everything is calculated and all these things can all be well it's just crazy He starts it not realizing his tweets like the Dogecoin joke that he made. He knew.

It just was an engine to all of these other alt shit coins of this pump and dump on that side. He's doing it with other coins. He was doing it during crypto week this weekend with come rocket coin and blah, blah, blah. That he was making tweets about goods and services are the true. That's why he tweeted Canada, United States, Mexico. Goods and services are the true barometer of the economy. That's why he tweeted Canada, United States, Mexico. Because if you take the first letter of each of those, it's C-U-M. And that's for Comrocket, the cryptocurrency.

Fucking NAFTA. That's what it is. Interesting, right? So he's having fun. He's playing with shit. What's kind of cool is normally the people who move the entire world, we don't see. We don't know who they are. The fucking Koch brothers or whatever.

This guy is moving the entire world and we're seeing it happen in live time tweets fascinating unbelievable what about uh keep it on billionaires what about bezos going to space there's part of me that kind of likes it and i think it's like we need to check on on musk i don't believe that he has nefarious intentions but like you need someone else it's a safety precaution i wonder if he doesn't even want to do it but the government is basically like yo can you just please do this so that we have a safety like a fail safe in case musk goes wild right because we can't be too, for lack of a word, like reliant on Musk. Yeah.

If he's doing all the space exploration, all the rockets, all the missiles, like everything, and then all of a sudden he starts beefing with us. Just last week you were tight that the government was bailing him out. I know. Now you're like, I think he should go into space also. I did say at the end of it, like maybe there's good for competition and maybe it'll be good. But like part of me starts to look you're like, I think he should go into space also. I did say at the end of it, like, maybe there's good for competition and maybe it'll be good.

But like, part of me starts to look at this like, does Bezos want that? Or is Bezos being asked to do this? And when you have a business that's that successful, you're in business with the government. It's like, you have to be, especially in America. So I'm wondering if they're doing this just as a safety precaution, because Musk is kind of a loose cannon. Bezos is not. Bezos is, let's do this. Buy the book.

I will lobby Congress. I will spend half a million dollars. I'll do this the old-fashioned way. How do we do this? I have found a way to avoid getting broken up. We're clearly a monopoly or on the way to being a monopoly. We have a huge advantage in, the, uh, what is it? Uh, goods business.

Um, and, and that's not being checked by the government probably because I'm working with them and, uh, maybe he's doing for them. I mean, that's just me trying to understand why. Right. I don't know. What do you guys think? I think it's possible. I think it is interesting that Elon Musk could do it without, but yeah, to your point, like

you're in bed with the government at that level of success. You can't not be. So I can believe's possible. I think it is interesting that Elon Musk could do it without. But yeah, to your point, you're in bed with the government at that level of success. You can't not be. So I can believe. Just go up there. Just handle this. You have an empire. That comes with a cost. Yeah.

He says he's going to be on the... Yeah. He's going to space. That's kind of wild. He's bringing his brother with him. Really? The whole family getting taken out. What do you think?

Fake his own death? Yeah, or Musk shoots that shit down. Shoot down a competition, bro. What do you guys think? All right, next one. Fuck it. That's funny. Did you see what

Cat Williams said about cancel culture this weekend? I didn't see the whole thing, but I heard him a little bit. I saw the snippet. Yeah. Yeah, basically the gist

is that he basically said that cancel culture doesn't really exist, that there's not really like a culture of cancellation. And he uses this quote, if you ask all the people that didn't make it in the NBA, if you ask them, if you just lower the goal down another foot, they would all tell you that they would make it. Nobody likes the out of bounds, but the out of bounds got to be there or else you'll run into the stands. No one likes a speed limit, but it's got to be there. No one likes to shoulder the road, but it's got to be there. No one likes the shoulder of the road, but it's got to be there. And if you ask people,

I don't know who we got canceled that we wish we had back. Who are they? If it's done for the reason it's done for and it helped who it helped, that's all that's going to happen. Blah, blah, blah. And basically he says that people back in the day, when they could say whatever they want, maybe they weren't all that funny anyway. I don't

disagree with a lot of what he said. I think there's a more nuanced way to say it. I think you also should be allowed to, if your intention is to try to be funny and you fucked up, you should be allowed to try again. I also think it's ironic that so many people were rushing to celebrate this guy and how perfectly he said it. And we're neglecting the fact that he fought and lost to a 17 year old kid,

got the shit kicked out of him. And also went on a, to quote the media, xenophobic rant toward a Mexican dude at a show who was offended by one of his jokes. Told him, had the whole audience chant USA, USA, USA. Said some shit like, if you don't want to be here, if you're going to support another country, get the fuck out. That's not a very tolerant guy. These are all very cancelable things. They tried to cancel him cancel him yeah he's just kind of neglecting all that and the people that are rushing to celebrate him bother me more i love kat williams people that are rushing to celebrate him bother me more because it's like oh now he's your hero because he said

one thing you agreed with maybe he's acknowledging it maybe he's like yo when i had all those people chanting usa i actually brought it up he could have brought it up that's a great time to say you know what i fucked up and he did apologize and i don't have a problem with cat my bigger problem is with the people celebrating this guy now he's your hero and we just ignore all the other shit exactly yeah i don't think he's uh i don't think he's been in a position to like deal with cancel culture like cat's been forgiven for a lot of his transgressions because people are like oh that's cat being cat he's crazy he's on drugs or he's doing something he's got a tumor or whatever the fuck he is at some sort of medical issues right so i think a lot of people just let

him do whatever so he hasn't really experienced it because the expectation for him is so much higher right um but i also think this is a little bit of like just being a comedian. Like we like to have the unique take. So we say the shit that nobody else is saying. And the unique take on cancel culture right now is that it's good or you shouldn't complain about it because the unanimous decision now with even within politics is cancel culture has gone too far. Right? Like everybody believes cancel culture has gone too far.

So in order to have your own little hot take, you're going to have to say you shouldn't. And I don't think that he wants to write jokes differently. I think if you ask Kat, I think he's a purist. He just wants to say the funny things that he thinks are funny. Yeah. But he's making the argument for changing his material. He's saying you don't lower the basketball rim.

You don't do whatever. And so, okay, Kat, so now you're not going to use certain words that you used to use before like now you're going to change what you think is funny according to what the internet believes is okay to joke about i know that he wouldn't do that so i know that he's not capable of living his raps if you will yeah so i think that this is more about like having a hot take instead of actually feeling this way and when he puts out more stand-up he's incredibly prolific cat like yeah so when he puts out more stand-up we're gonna see and the stand-up is all of a sudden clean and he's going along with whatever uh twitter says is okay to say and not using any uh you know

derogatory terms not being sexist bigoted uh you know homophobic racist at all and any of his jokes then we'll go okay you you believe it i have a feeling that's not going to be the case yeah no i but time will tell yeah time will tell i don't i don't necessarily disagree with what he said though i do think that like a lot of the cancel culture conversation is like kind of blown out of proportion and if you look at like actual comedians that are like canceled for jokes like there's not a ton and like most people that are canceled are like for actual bad shit like cosby or whatever like it's typically i find like for actual bad things. It's more it's less like it's more the fear of cancellation that I think people are concerned with. And that inhibits the creative process.

So it's like how often does it really happen? Maybe not that much. But things only need to happen a couple of times for it to create a fear. But things only need to happen a couple times for it to create a fear. Like the fear of getting into like being in the water and getting eaten by a shark is way more prominent than the actual occurrence. Sure. Right? So we often dictate our behavior based on the fear, not how likely it will be.

Yeah. And I think that's what a lot of like creatives, comics think about. They're like, oh, I'd like to do this joke. But like what if it gets out there and I get canceled and I lose my sponsorship? And I'll say, okay, I won't do the show. So now they can't create in this free environment. And Cat is created for himself, to his credit, a career where he can create quite freely, kind of like what we've done. And just to slice what you're saying, you're not saying someone that wants to do an outright racist or hateful joke. You're talking about someone that wants to do a joke that is like edgy yeah but

they might not be canceled for it but they're like i don't want to run the risk yeah exactly and the joke could be inherently racist because it's a joke but now that's not because of how you actually believe right but the joke itself is racist or it's sexist or impigmented in some way right but ultimately it's a joke but it's just a joke you're not saying it because you feel that way you're saying because that thing said is funny right yeah i think that's a good distinction and i i tend to agree that there are some people that are doing just offensive stuff and it's kind of lazy because it's not trying to be offensive it's just trying i mean trying to be funny just trying to shock you with offensiveness i find that a bit corny but i still don't think you should be um like crucified for that yeah you fucked up man

do better yeah that's the that's the thing and the audiences will decide like if enough people support that kind of humor then you'll have that kind of humor and you'll have that kind of audience and you'll be fine that's fair too and uh but just the idea of like the ability to go out there and create without being concerned yes i think is important for us it is so hard to be creative every obstacle that comes in here i'm that much more in my head i'm that much less funny yeah yeah i will say one thing that i didn't like about his comment and that i disagree with is that he makes i think a false equivocation between like sports and cancel culture yeah where he goes there's you know there's

boundaries for a reason there's a speed limit for a reason and my thing is like yeah but those things are decided upon by a governing body like there's the nba or there's the government that comes together and says yo this is how these rules are going to operate and everyone that is in our jurisdiction is going to operate under those rules yeah whereas with cancellation and like the mob quote unquote on the internet a lot of times it's dictated by like academia is dictated by like nerds random people on twitter like there's no consistency or coherence it's just like uh you know whatever the movement is on the internet so like if everyone was under the same rules like okay we're not gonna trash politicians in this way then it's like all right cool but if it's

like oh you can only trash conservative politicians in this way then there's some inconsistency and then there's inconsistency and so to me it's like oh there's something that's that's happening that's not like what he we have boundaries too like our boundary is funny like if it's not funny it's out of bounds yeah right so the second it's not funny everybody just goes hey buddy regardless if i agree with the politics or not the joke wasn't funny enough yeah and you're not canceled for that but effectively you are if you only tell unfunny jokes nobody wants to see you and then you don't have a career right you've canceled yourself yeah so i think that that does already exist but i think he's misconstruing what's really going on right and i don't have a career. Right. You've canceled yourself. Yeah. So I think that that does already exist, but I think he's misconstruing what's really going on.

Right. And I don't chalk it up to ignorance because Kat's like a really smart guy. And the guy will read. The guy will dig into it. I'm sure it's abundantly clear to him what cancel culture is. I don't think he's just riffing. Right. He knows what it is.

He's aware. And he knows all the controversy around it. And he's choosing to have this take, but it is what it is. it is okay last one and then we out of here all right boom yesterday the united states of america greatest country on earth yes played in the conca calf final okay which is basically a soccer tournament amongst like all the uh like teams in north america and like central america and like the caribbean and shit yeah they played mexico on the final and Central America and the Caribbean and shit. They played Mexico in the final and won basically at the same time as the Floyd Mayweather fight. So a lot of people missed it.

But it was arguably the most absurd game. Why? It was just chaos. So basically the game went full 90 minutes. USA and Mexico also are just rivals in this division. So they're the two biggest teams. They're the two best teams. They go back and forth winning, losing, that kind of thing.

And they played in Denver. But the thing is when you play a game So, like, they're the two biggest teams or the two best teams. They go back and forth winning, losing, that kind of thing. And they played in Denver. But the thing is when you play a game versus Mexico in America, a soccer game, it's basically Mexican home field advantage every time. Because Mexicans, no matter where you are, they're coming out to the game. And then Americans are kind of like, oh, yeah, we'll go if we can. So, like, no matter if you're playing versus Mexico in America, you're playing 50% in front of Mexican fans no matter what. So there's no real, like, home field advantage.

So they're playing in Denver, and the game is just absolutely absurd from like start to finish there's like dirty plays there's the game goes full 90 minutes then it goes an extra additional time they add extra time at the end they stop the game because there's homophobic chants in the audience yes which this is actually an interesting thing like culturally speaking because soccer players are the gayest half. Yeah, exactly. And Mexicans are the most homophobic. Yeah, exactly. So you get the two together.

What's happening? That's why they have the fence there, so they don't beat them up. I thought they were building a wall. No, but basically they start doing this homophobic chant in the 90th minute, and they add a bunch of extra time because they stopped the game. What was the chant? So they don't have the exact chant, but basically they were saying puto. And that's where it gets weird because they...

It's just calling a male. It's a male bitch. Yeah. Puto. But apparently there's a translation that kind of translates to... We use it in the same way that we would use the word maggot with an F,

but it translates literally to male bitch. Yeah. Because puta is bitch. So you're a puto. So it's used in the same way, but it's not literally the same word. Right. Right? Okay.

And so then they stopped the game. So apparently a bunch of these federations have put in this rule where if there's a homophobic chant or a racist chant, they stop the game. Okay. And then they put a penalty on the audience, basically. Which is kind of like a wild rule that I don't know if it exists in other sports. How is that a penalty on the audience? Because they say, we're not playing the game until you guys stop.

It was the only way to, like, the true diehard fans in Europe, was the only way to really threaten them. But how do you penalize the audience? They're not playing. Because you don't play the game. Yeah, now you can't watch the game. They paid money to watch the game. And if they continue to chant, we're just going to not play.

You're giving the audience too much power. Because now my team's behind or say they look winded and shit like that oh let's just start some racing shit give them a little time out and then they back into shit yeah yeah that's what some people say they might have been doing because it was in the 90th minute game was tied up and then they start this chant and they're like all right what's happening okay so then what happens so it goes into extra time christian Pulisic, the legend. The legend. Scores a penalty kick in like the 116th minute. Okay.

Puts the team ahead. And then right before that, the American goalkeeper got subbed out because he got injured. So they put in the substitute keeper who's like from Denver,

like grew up there. And in like five minutes left in the game, Mexico gets a PK. He saves it. What's a PK? What's a PK? Penalty kick.

Okay. He saves it like off the line, like the most absurd thing ever. There's like a streaker that runs on the field there's another goal that Mexico scored that they took back like the game just had everything there were fights like crazy about this story they were throwing bottles and shit oh yeah that's the thing like that's the other thing I don't get how can we always talk about basketball players like one person throws popcorn at them and it's like the biggest deal in the world everyone's like crying like oh he threw popcorn or whatever because those are actual athletes and then at

the soccer game they're literally at the corner one of the best players in the men's team got hit in the head with a bottle like a glass bottle hit him in the head and then they kept playing you know what the wildest part of that is i still don't want to watch soccer yeah like like that was the craziest match ever that sounds crazy yo i like it You gotta watch good soccer Football I like it I still think it's cool I just wanna know

Who were they calling a bitch Out on the American team And what was he doing And was he being a bitch Yeah Probably Cause all those soccer players Are some boot dogs

Yeah They call Like crying when they fall On the ground And shit like that Flailing Always grabbing their ankle And then playing two minutes later

There's a bunch of boot dogs Grabbing their ankles They are grabbing their ankles That's what two minutes later. There's a bunch of putos. They are grabbing their ankles. Yeah, I don't know. I think that's some puto shit. But anytime America wins, I'm about it. So this is awesome. Shouts to Christian Pulisic. We gotta have him on the podcast. He's a rising star,

huh? Legend. He just won recently. He won the Champions League a week ago. For Chelsea. Yeah, and now he's back Chelsea Which is a neighborhood for putos So Maybe they were right Maybe it worked out the whole time We love you, we appreciate you

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