Andrew Schulz's Flagrant with Akaash Singh - Schulz: Quarterbacks are the Dumbest NFL Players | Patreon Sample

Episode Date: June 19, 2020

This week Andrew, Akaash, AlexxMedia and Mark discuss Chris D'elia's allegations, Woody Allen, Schulz fighting his brother, Coronavirus spiking, performing comedy outdoors and much more. INDULGE! Want a new episode every week? Become a Patron! www.Patreon.com/FLAGRANT2

What up, people? Shultz here, and you guys are about to listen to a clip from our weekly Patreon episode. If you want to sign up to our Patreon, support the flagrancy, support what we are doing, completely uncensored, flagrant content, you go to patreon.com slash flagrant2. With no more interruptions, here is the exclusive clip. While we're talking about football players, earlier, i don't know if it's included in this episode uh while we're talking about while we're talking about listen i said i made a statement that i stand by i don't think quarterbacks are smart i think they're smart for dumb people which are football players in general

quarterback is the easiest thing to do i think we over inflate how difficult it is to get to the meat of the story okay get to the meat don't girlfriend this don't tell as much as other shit you get to the meat of the story what happened okay i said i said let me just keep going let me build it up let me build it up okay i was like what do they do that's that hard they have the plays already made for them okay they know exactly where their players gonna go they just throw the ball that's it it's not that fucking hard they're not doing that much thinking like oh you have to do it quick you have to do it in three seconds how much shit in life takes more than three seconds name something in life that you make a decision

that takes more than three seconds i gotta pee i don't go do i have to pee i think i gotta pee okay i'll pee no just go pee i know where i'm a piss i got three toilets i choose story starting one has the story started one of them toilets that's what i do all right okay i check three toys toys choose i'm gonna choose we don't have that much time on the memory cards you just got to get to the story listen point is i'm like yo give me the wonderlick test the wonderlick test is a test to see how stupid NFL players are, right? It's just like, hopefully you're not super stupid, right? Yeah. I start to take this Wunderlich test, right?

I am bodying this test, bro. I am fucking bodying this test, bro. When I tell you guys, I'm literally looking at Akash. Akash is shaking in his boots. Akash, you were shaking in your boots. The first couple questions were so easy, I was like, oh, fuck, maybe this shit is mad easy. But I was bodying them shits, right? Now, as I'm bodying these things, it's a time test, right?

Al is taking a man long click on the boxes. I was purposely going fast, so he couldn't put this shit up here. I was taking mad long click of the boxes, right? You know what's taking mad long? Andrew's gonna answer the question. That's what's taking mad long. Can I tell it?

Can I? The screen is mad far away. He re-read every question three times. The screen is mad far away. He's singing a song. What? I was doing that?

You're repeating every question. Okay, let me get this straight. Okay, so I'm gonna understand it. Yeah, yeah. Okay, so. Was I getting them right? You know what? repeating every question. Okay, let me get this straight. Okay, so I'm going to understand that. Yeah, yeah. Okay, so. And was I getting them wrong or was I getting them right? It was taking a lot longer

than three seconds. I'll tell you that shit right now. Was I getting them wrong or was I getting them right? I don't know because your score was so low you probably got a few wrong. If I knew the fucking question

before I got the question it wouldn't take longer. What? If you knew the plays. If I knew the plays. The defense is set up. You can see what the defense is doing. Why are we acting like it's so crazy?

The defense is already set up. That guy's there. That guy's there. Safety's over there. How many different options can there be? A lot. No, there can't. That's what they tell you.

You believe it. Never once did I have struggle playing quarterback as a Maddox. Why did you get on the Wanderlick test? We're going to get there. Look, we're going to get there, dog. Get there. We're going to take the Wanderlick test. I'm literally uh blah

blah blah girlfriend get to the fucking end of the story yo yo yo can i can i speak my truth he's trying to run out this memory can i speak my truth bro let me just speak my truth bro let me speak my truth right i'm akash is silent right because he's so frightened that I'm about to body through this Wonderlic test. Right? Apparently, this Wonderlic test has mad questions on it. Right?

And Akash, full well knowing that there's mad questions. There's a progress bar. That Alex hid. It ain't hidden from nobody. I've been watching that the whole time. We all saw it.

We literally made, I didn't see it. Alex made the shit You're talking about Everybody saw that shit You're talking about That green shit at the bottom Yeah

That shit was That shit was progress First of all I did not see it say progress Second of all I didn't know it was moving What did you think it was You didn't notice

It was getting bigger I thought it was How good I was doing I thought it was Green is good Red is bad Orange is in the middle And the fact that

It keeps getting longer What's that mean Say what What's it keep getting longer What's that mean I thought I was doing really good I thought I thought I was doing really good Bro that thought I was doing really good, bro.

That's really all I thought I was. You had no idea how many questions were on. First of all, is it fair to say I had no idea there was how many questions? I didn't have a scan trying to let me know how many bubbles there was about to get. So you weren't looking for it at all? You weren't trying to adjust like a quarterback would? Say what? You weren't trying to adjust like a quarterback would?

Honestly? Based on the movement of the progress bar? I'll do it. I'll go through it. I'll be like, I'll see next. Not at all, yeah. I mean, we have it on video. Yeah.

We do? My point is this. I got the number I got. The number I got. Hired in a lot of great quarterbacks. Right? Donovan McNabb. Hotter than Donovan McNabb.

I don't even think Donovan McNabb took the fucking test, bro. I think he let a cat just walk on the fucking keyboard. Donovan McNabb got a 15, bro. And he prepared for this shit. I got a 22. Yeah. I didn't even know how many questions there were. If I had allocated time per question And I just finished the test

I literally think I would have gotten At least a 49 I literally think I would have gotten At least a 49 Akash 100% The average NFL player Not quarterback Player 20-21

They know how many questions are on it You are slightly above retarded They know how many questions are on it. You are slightly above retarded. They know how many questions are on it, Akash. Slightly above retarded. Akash, can you at least acknowledge this? Can you at least acknowledge this? They knew how many questions were on it. I don't know.

No, no. Can you acknowledge that? I don't know. When they run the 40-meter dash or the 40-yard dash, do you think they know it's 40 yards or no? Yeah. Okay, so we acknowledge that don't? Yeah. Okay. Okay.

So we acknowledge that. Right? Yeah. Is it called the 50 question wonder lick? Is it? No. It's called the wonder lick. Exactly. So you don't know how many questions.

If it was called 50 questions wonder lick, I would have finished all 50 questions. Thanks for making my argument. You didn't know how many questions there were? Say what? You didn't know how many questions there were. That's correct. And you didn't look to find out how many questions there were at all. Akash, can I be honest with you?

You didn't look for a progress bar. Akash, can I be honest with you? You didn't even try. Akash, that's correct and you didn't look to find out how many questions there were oh gosh can i be honest you didn't look for a progress bar gosh can i be honest you didn't even try oh gosh can i be honest with you the questions were so juvenile and simple they were so simple why'd it take you so long then say what why'd it take you so long it didn't take me long i was bodying them questions every question took you mad long i mean mad long i mean if i'm being honest with you i want to sell this is honest man if i want to be honest let me sell theatrics okay um honestly i didn't think it was that many questions because you let's be honest was i not killing the questions be honest you were taking mad long can you just i'm gonna be honest be honest. You were getting most of them right.

You admitted prior, there were questions that you had gotten wrong as you were looking at, but I got right. Because you took too long. Because I'm smarter than you. Because you took too long. So, so, so, if I'm 22, what are you? Getting the test done faster. I don't know.

I don't know. Bro, to put it in comparison, here are occupations as they scored. So like a train conductor, we've got a 21. Chugga, chugga, chugga, chugga. Let's go. A janitor scores 14. The average janitor scores 14. You got that?

That's what I'm saying. And they knew. I did not know. Secretary? Yep. 24. I'm not made to be a secretary I'm not made for that work My point is this

If I knew I get minimum 49 I'll be honest with you I don't see how I could get less than 49 Do you want to take it test for test You and I So we go test for test? I'll take it test for test. I'll take it test for test. So we go test for test. Test for test.

Test for test. Test for test. Now, we have to take the exact same test. If it's the exact same test every time, you've already taken it. Motherfucker, obviously it's going to be a different test than the one I took. Is it?

And you also took that same test that I took. How many questions are there going to be? Are there 50? Also, I never said NFL players were, or NFL quarterback was easy. Oh, would you like a cap for all this capping you're doing right now? questions are there gonna be are there also i never said nfl players were nfl quarterback oh would you like a cap for all this capping you're doing right now would you like to put a cap on for this cap are you doing right now are you a little skirt are you a little skirt yeah let's go are you oh you want it let's go okay so what is on the line and keep in mind bro it ain't gonna

be spelling on this test okay this is gonna be wonder lick test okay on the line? And keep in mind, bro, it ain't going to be spelling on this test. Okay? This is going to be Wonderlic test. All right. What's on the line? Help us decide. Say again. What's on the line? If I get a higher score than you, you have to take it again?

Say again. You get to take it again? Son, you know how many questions there are. You have a complete advantage over me. No, just take an IQ test. Say again. Just take an IQ test. That's frightening, bro.

I ain't going to take that shit. Ain't nobody want to know really how smart they were, dog. Son, i took that shit once when i was in spain bro yeah i was at the um i was working at this fucking advertising agency doesn't matter and i'm so bored because i had nothing to do during the day so i just took one of them iq tests that's online you know those those like advertisements pop up i took that shit i was so fucking frightened, bro. How'd you do? Genius. Genius. Did you quit?

Are you afraid to take it now? No, but I got 1,600. You quit on the spot? I got 1,600, bro. I got 1,600 on it, bro. Wow. I know. Honestly, there is a chance that you and I do poorly on the Wonderlic

because it's a test for retards. So we are obviously going to fail a retard test. Keep that cap on, baby. Because I'm capping for you. Yeah, no, I appreciate that. Look, point is, you and I will take the test. Al, you trying to take this test? Why are you going to take it twice, yo?

Son, you took the test with me. You looked at all the same fucking questions as me. Bruh. Bruh what? You You took it Bruh what Your answer should You scared dog Your answer should You scared

You shaking in your boots Why she just taking the one time Taking the one time You shaking the ass boots Yo But for real You don't want that do you Alright let's go

Be honest you're a little bit scared Of course Why are you scared Cause what if your dumb white ass does better than me that's what i'm talking about it's going down now i know how many questions there are dog and please believe i'm gonna go through it because first of all i didn't even take it with my testing strategy i got a completely different testing strategy look at the answers first that's the thing a lot of people don't do that's why i gave so much time for the questions

because i was answering the question first and then looking at the answers nope right two minutes what is it two minutes left yeah okay akash did we do any patreon questions yeah we did one all right get one question real quick we got two minutes left on this episode ready here it is a lot of people ask about dalia so we did two questions okay we talked about dalia All right, get one question real quick. We got two minutes left on this episode. All right, bro. Ready? Here it is. A lot of people asked about D'Elia, so we did two questions. Okay, we talked about D'Elia.

Keep it a buck with any of y'all subscribed to YesJulesOnlyFans. YesJules has got OnlyFans? Yeah. If she covers in her chin dimple. Yo, you are weird. She got one of them butt chins. She got blouse. She look like Michael Blaustein.

I don't think I've ever looked at her chin. No, she look like Michael Blaustein say what a butt chin is kind of hotter no dude why if you're an ass man so it's two butts yeah you're just an ass all day no dude it's just weird the butt chin is fucking weird you like butt chin al you like butt chin i like dimples it's not a deal breaker but i'm not butt chin? I like dimples. It's not a deal breaker, but I'm not into it. Cheek dimples. Chin dimples. No, no. Cheek dimples. Yes.

Oh, yeah. Those are great. Butt chin deal breaker. 100% deal breaker. Deal breaker for me, but I'm not into it. I just can't think of anybody right now who has- Thinking all day and shit. Right?

What the heck? This chin shit? No, dude. Oh, bro. No. Uh-uh. Uh-uh, Akash. Not doing it. Let's wrap this shit up. How much time we got? A minute, max. Oh, bro. No. Uh-uh. Uh-uh, Akash. Not doing it.

Let's wrap this shit up. How much time we got? A minute, max. Yeah, a minute. Literally a minute? Last question. Bro, I got to fucking open the phone back up. Just wrap it up.

Yeah, God forbid. See how lazy we are? What is it? Last one. Yo, Joe Swain be asking a lot of questions, yo. Somebody said I look like Matthew Cooper. Why does Akash look like Drew and Alex had a baby? I think that's actually kind of funny.

All right, just me. Yo, it's all good, dog. Hey, do you think that's a Wunderlich question, bro? You know what? I got it done in time. So there you go. All right, yo, asshole army, we love y'all, man. We'll see you Tuesday.

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