Andrew Schulz's Flagrant with Akaash Singh - Schulz Reacts: Michael B. Jordan is the new Scarface | Patreon Sample

Episode Date: May 15, 2020

Schulz Reacts: Michael B. Jordan is the new Scarface | Patreon Sample by

All right, all right, all right. Michael B. Jordan is playing Tony Montana in the new Scarface. Yeah. Listen, let me tell you something about Michael B. Jordan. Go. Very likable guy. Not a good actor. And I say this knowing full well he's a fucking joint.

Yeah. My man is a bad, that's a bad bitch, yo. But is he a joint? He's a fucking joint? Yeah. My man is a bad, that's a bad bitch, yo. But is he a joint? He's a fucking joint! But is it, let's be honest, is it all body? Or is it... Nah, my man got good teeth. I don't, the teeth rub me the wrong way.

I'm being objective here. Hey, they can rub me the right way. Do they? Do they, though? They could if they wanted. But for real? Yeah. Okay, you think that he is truly a good looking guy man is a is a piece yo i don't i'm not feeling it to be honest i think he's a great body but i'm not feeling anything else what's not to feel i just don't think he's

objectively that attractive in the face objectively speaking and i'll call a guy attractive mark how you feel um he's pretty attractive he's pretty though he's not like stunning al can you be honest still who's stunning because there's no stunning see that's what i'm saying stunning is gay no ronaldo is he's stunning that's that's he's not gay yeah but that's like he looks gay he only makes you feel gay he makes you feel gay now but he mad pretty and let's lock in on this you feel gay you feel gay. He makes you feel gay. Nah, but he mad pretty and shiny. Let's lock in on this. You feel gay. You feel gay. Let's lock in. No, no, no.

You feel gay when you see Ronaldo? Is that it? You have a gay feeling? Be honest. I mean, I can tell that's an attractive guy. Why? I think he's too attractive. Because he makes your dick move? Most girls have said, nah, he's too cute.

Too cute? If these bitches don't shut the fuck up about too cute. Nah, for real. I've heard that a lot. Like, he's just too pretty. Oh, because he makes them feel insecure. He makes them feel insecure. Nah, I think because he's gay. He's just too much of a pretty boy.

That's what they're saying. Like him, Mario Lopez, Ryan Seacrest. Don't you ever put Mario Lopez in the same fucking conversation. Hey, real talk. Mario Lopez got longevity, yo. Ronaldo. Yo, Mario Lopez got longevity. And he got them dimples.

He do got dimples. He do got them dimples. He do got dimples. He do got them dimples. And he gotta be in his 40s, 50s. No, he's aged brilliantly. That's what I'm saying. You gotta put weight on that. He's the John Stamos of Latinos. So maybe Michael B. George is the hottest black dude for white women.

Nah, son. He's like the safest black dude for white women to like. He's like cute and like teddy bear. Who's badder in black dudes? Nah, black girls love him too. Yo, I just realized some shit, y'all. Oh, shit. Nah, I just

realized some shit, y'all. You ready? I'm ready. Al Pacino wasn't Cuban either. So if we come for Michael B. Jordan with the smoke... Keep that same fucking energy! Real talk, if we come to Michael B. Jordan With the smoke Keep that same

Fucking energy Real talk If we come To Michael B. Jordan With the smoke Because he's not Latino We gotta have

The same smoke For Al Pacino Playing a Latino Yup Wow bro That's the point I was trying to make before You know what I'm saying

Stay woke brother Stay woke You know what I'm saying We need to put these Motherfuckers on the corner to sleep for good. Yo, that's real talk. If a white guy can play a Latin, dude, can a black guy play the Latin, dude? I don't have a problem with appropriation.

Appropriate. Just don't complain about appropriation and then appropriate. That's my issue. Even if the role was originally appropriated. Yeah, you don't got what two wrongs don't make a right. Do two wongs make a right? They don't make a white either, so fuck it. Okay, interesting.

So you're saying- Two wongs damn sure don't make no white. They make a fucking fluke. They make a woo, hon. Okay, so you're saying Michael B. Jordan might have never said anything about cultural appropriation, but the community that is knocking cultural appropriation, you got to keep that same energy, bro. And I guarantee you they complained about Al Pacino being Scarface. I didn't give a fuck, and if Michael B. Jordan nails that shit and knocks it out of the park, hey, great.

Good on him. I just want to hear those motherfuckers keep that same energy. I mean, I'm a Michael B. Jordan fan. My man is foin. Foin. He foin. He's foin. Actually, I don't find him that fine. You hating, yo. I'll say

Cristiano Ronaldo is a fine man. That's a fine man He mag shiny What? Ronaldo mag shiny It's too much I like a clean cut guy It's too much where it becomes

Like you're not attractive You're too much of a pretty boy When Al wants to fuck you Hold on You like a more rugged dude? Yeah Come on You like a Jason Momoa?

Oh that's a bad motherfucker That's a man That's a man That's a man. That's a man. He could throw an axe. Son, yes. He could protect me. Cradle me.

I need a man who can protect me. Hey, Michael B. Jordan got hands. You make me wet, Aquaman. Oh, no. What? What's wet? What? What's wet? Oh, don't start this, bro. Son. Please don't start this, no. What? What's wet? What? What's wet?

Oh, don't start this, bro. Son. Please don't start this, bro. More of their science talk yesterday. Is water wet? Not is water wet. Is a fish wet? A fish is not wet.

It is a fish. Son, they were really going for it yesterday. Don't pretend like you weren't part of it. That was kind of got me. Actual quote from Al. Fish is water. Yeah, you were a party that was that was kinda got me actual quote from Al fish is water yeah you were on my side with this

why you rolling your eyes we were on the same team fighting against Mara why you snitching six nine hey it is what it is king of New York shit you know what I mean

it's king of New York shit I don't know that's what we do you know what I mean alright but in all seriousness what are we gonna do with this movie are we gonna go see it in New York shit. I don't know. That's what we do. You know what I mean? All right. But in all seriousness, what are we going to do with this movie? Are we going to go see it?

I'm going to probably go see it. Well, actually, I'm going to listen to see how it is. And if people say it's dope, I'm going to go see it. I'm not sold on Michael B. Jordan as an actor.

I think he's a star. I don't think anybody is. They say he's a face act. Here's a question. But he does these movies that get acclaimed, like Fruitvale Station. He did another one with Jamie Foxx. This one, the verdict's a question. But he does these movies that get acclaimed, like Fruitvale Station. He did another

one with Jamie Foxx. This one, the verdict's still out. Did that come out yet? What? The one with Jamie Foxx, and he's a lawyer or some shit. I don't know. Foxx, he came out. Yo, but maybe it's a bigoted thing on our end. Maybe we don't see Latinos as black. And the fact that there's a black Latino happening, we're like,

huh? That don't make sense. He's supposed to be Hispanic. But if he was like, no, I really feel like it could be some shit. Like when you envision, like when I envision an Indian, I actually envision an Indian of your complexion. Can I say this?

Go. It is not racial appropriation. What is it? What's the term? Huh? Cultural. I'll pull my fucking dick out right now. Do that shit dog.

Keep that up. Keep that up. Keep that up, dog. Son, I knew I was doing something. Keep that shit up, son. That's a good-ass point you're about to make. It's not racial appropriation. It is.

What kind of appropriation? I'll take off my belt. Cultural appropriation. I'll wrap it around my dick real tight. You know what I mean? Like the guy from Kill Bill. Hey, don't threaten me

with a good time. What are you talking about? Okay. Cultural appropriation. And Michael B. Jordan's culture is African-American. Al. Jordan's culture is African American. Al Pacino's culture is Italian, fam. That was appropriated.

Huh? I'm just saying we know that's appropriated. But if you have a problem with appropriation, then don't do the same shit. I don't mind Al Pacino playing. No, maybe we're staying true to the movie. You can never have a Cuban playing that role. That don't matter to people. True to the movie. It's never about

the artist. It's about the culture being represented. I'm speaking on behalf of those people. Yo, real talk, because they never have that same energy for when black English people play black American characters, and that's not the same culture. Ooh. And Al Pacino is Italian-American in the same way Michael B. Jordan is

African-American, right? Exactly. Did you make my point? I don't know what the same way Michael B. Jordan is African-American, right? Exactly. Did you make my point? I don't know what the fuck you're saying. I'm agreeing. I agree, but I was a little

hesitant to agree. No, he's the same as Michael B. Jordan in terms of percentage that he's American. They're both American. They're 100% American. They're the same amount Cuban.

They're not Cuban. Latinos got black. What? Latinos. Latinos have black. In them. They also have white black what latinos latinos have black in them they also have white in them how do they have black in them i mean people were purchased from the continent of africa and then they ended up in puerto rico so wait dominican wait all latinos have black in them not all but a lot do puerto rans, Dominicans. Children of the diaspora. Wait, the islanders. Speak, my white brother.

Actually, not only the islanders. Slave trade reached Mexico, Brazil. 100%. All throughout Panama. A lot of black people in Panama. Like, black, black. If you had a dark-ass, even Dominican, playing like a fucking, who's this?

Like a big poppy-looking-ass dude playing Scarface. Cool, I get it. That's what it should be. But you can't get an African American and say that's not the same thing as Al Pacino doing it. It's the same shit.

Just don't act like you're gonna go see this. And it's cool now that we're representing. You know why I don't like it? Black people in a big hurry. Because I don't believe in Michael B. Jordan as an actor for this. That's another problem. That's the real reason I don't like him.

That's the issue. He's not good enough at acting to pull this off. And he's going to let us down, and we love this movie. And we love this movie. We don't want it ruined. No, that's a big problem, too. Who should do it, though? Who should play Scarface?

Only one person, bro. Only one person. Oh, man.