Andrew Schulz's Flagrant with Akaash Singh - Stay Humble | Patreon Sample

Episode Date: March 13, 2020

This week Andrew, Akaash, and Alexx discussed: being quarantined in NYC, leaving your girl if she has the Corona-Virus, being a situational basketball coach, having a Flagrant 2 Anthem, being in proper dress code for an Indian wedding, Dreymond only being a band member, Kawhi holding back for the playoffs, Dababy making slaps, and much more. Liked this clip? Become a Patron! www.Patreon.com/Flagrant2

Yo, how serious I want to be 100% honest with us right now Your girl gets corona, do you get it? Yeah, you're gonna get it No, no, no, that's not what I'm saying I'm saying your girl You know what I'm asking Your girl gets corona

Quarantine that bitch Oh, ow, chill, dog Figurative, figurative, bitch. You mean the greater bitch. The greater bitch. I figured that's what you meant. I just had to clarify. Bitches in general.

I just had to clarify. Out of respect, I had to clarify. If any of y'all bitches upset about that, y'all bitches need to handle that, you damn self. Word. Corona has it. I figured that.

Corona has it. Yes, bitches. Real talk. Corona habit ass bitches. Real talk. No, for real. Now I do a thing. When my girl coughs, a quick bitch, that's what comes out.

It's quick. It's a corona bitch. The second she goes, bitch. Bitch. Swallow that corona, bitch. Nah, I get so annoyed anybody coughing near me

I'm like yo chill on the plane there was one person kept sneezing I'm like yeah I was close to speaking to the flight attendant really?

yeah I was like we should check check even though they can't check shit but it's like we should check on that this is an interesting

point about flying because flying is about to be way better yo there's a risk go first of all price is gonna go down price is down indian second of all first thing i said second of all it's less motherfuckers on every flight okay okay okay and i got one more check-in ain't nobody in the check-in oh i got even one more what's up what type of heartless animal would travel with a child at a time like this? Oh, yes.

So no crying, baby. Some of y'all too broke to fly. Listen to this. But if you did have some real fucking money, you know what I mean? Some real bread. Coach money.

Now, if you got that coach. Economy money. You know how slick these motherfuckers are, son? They think that they not slick so Mark buys the tickets to the flights right they think I don't know that they're buying extra leg room tickets

son they think I don't know these things why you saying they I don't buy the tickets what is the word I'm looking for slick no I'm going along with it black What is the word I'm looking for? Slick. No. I'm going along with it. Black.

No. What? Motherfucker out of your gobbling, yo. No, you're going along with it. Complicit. Complicit. That's right. That's the law days right there. That's the law Alex.

Bro, we need to have a law Alex segment where we bring law cases to al with all your courtroom experience done done done done all right you should also be talking the most with the health shit because you a nurse you were a nurse yeah but even fucking medical professionals don't know what the fuck's going on with this shit they don't pick up the phone, medical professionals, bro. They don't. What? Because my girl coughed and I said, call, call it up. Just call. I said, call. We called the hospital.

We called the CDC. We called 311. Do you guys know what that is? What they said. 311. Alternate side of the street is suspended. You're not wrong, bro. They did mention some parking

shit and I was like, just wait till it goes. Wait till the parking shit is done and then we'll get to the bottom of this because we can't be playing games out here, bro. If your girl got Corona, does she got it? What do you mean? No, we got Corona, son. Yo, this guy is

a gay guy. I know,, this guy is a gay guy. You're a gay guy. I mean, GG. I've already texted this to you guys. If one of us gets Corona, we got Corona. Oh no.

We quarantined together. You said it, but nobody ever like agreed. We quarantined. No thumbs up on it. Nothing. I just want a slumber party so bad, son. He want to spend two weeks away from his girl just with the boys so bad ordering fucking dominoes bro it's like a vacation you want that vacation dog i see you

two weeks paid vacation two weeks paid vacation that's exactly what this would be bro this is this is his dream scenario yeah we all get corona we got to stay in the studio for two weeks no i actually hate that why nope two weeks in the studio, in a place to sleep. Nope. But I'm saying- We just order some beds. Don't they got that ghost shit? No way.

Quarantine. I never heard of no bed rentals. No, they got a ghost bed company that they'll send you a bed in a box and it comes out. Casper. Yeah, Casper. Ghost bed.

Yeah. That was good. No, but they got that right brain works that is how it like i don't remember the name i remember some other shit about it and then like you know how i know our gosh's name no doubt because my mom would call him oshkosh bagash and that was your shit growing up that was my shit son i would only wear oshkosh yeah and now i only wear Oshkosh. And now I only wear Oshkosh. Corona bump.

Corona nap. You know what I'm saying? That corona bump. Yo. What? That's the fucking, we'd be living, dog. Corona. That's all I'm saying.

So if my girl, my girl made me kiss her before I left today. And I fought it. I fought it hard. But you gave in? I gave in like a little hoe. Like a it hard. But you gave in? I gave in like a little hoe. Like a little bitch. But she's confident and shit? No, no.

I made her call her father first. Her father's a doctor. And I made her call her father. And I asked if it was okay. And she goes. How did he know it's okay? Say again? How did he know it's okay?

Come on, bro. Al just said medical professionals are confused. Man, come on, bro. Come on, bro. He's a medical professional. Don't put me through that, bro. Who did you just say doesn't know what's going on? Medical professionals. And what is a doctor?

A medical amateur? No. Come on, bro. I had a turmeric pill. I had a turmeric pill and I had an airborne. I had one little thing of airborne. A go-gurt looking thing of airborne. Did you have goat, I mean, cow piss?

What? That's the new way. Bro, I'm not at Akash's wedding. What are you talking about? Hey, give me no Corona, Nick, motherfucker. I'll tell you this. Just a cow pissing on a champagne glass that goes on to more champagne. Bro, that'd be lit.

A cow piss champagne tower. Son, I'm with it. I'm with it. Corona cures. Say again? Corona cures. Now, I have to ask a question. In Muslim weddings,

in the champagne tower, do they fly things into it? That's good. Oh, man, that's good. We started out spicy. We all gonna die from Corona We might as well go out You know what I mean Let's live yo

You know what I'm saying Play the fucking anthem Let's play the flagrant 2 anthem Fuck it You know what I mean We out here Yo what's up This is Akash

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