Andrew Schulz's Flagrant with Akaash Singh - Trump Pod Aftermath: Media Spins, Canceled Special Taping and more…

Episode Date: October 16, 2024

Yerrr crazy things have occurred, so we had to explain what we think is going on and give our behind the scenes stories of what it was like meeting a President. We also had to get some jokes off about the new Chris Columbus info drop, media spinning the hell out of Schulz, Mark being a father, & much much more. INDULGE!  00:00 Intro 00:22 Trump is winning by a landslide 3:56 Trump called Alexx bald 4:39 What did Trump smell like? 6:41 He doesn't like Shane Gillis' impression? Other Qs 14:58 Everyone found what they wanted 18:26 How do you identify the grift? 20:40 We wish interview went on longer 23:24 Venue cancels Schulz's Special taping 30:05 Kamala Hype dying down? + Prevent defense 39:13 Down-low Trump supporters 41:14 Michael Jackson lived in Trump Tower 51:56 Christopher Columbus is Jewish 56:20 Trump performs better than his polling 59:01 Right's reclaiming h*eing + Who's more attractive? 1:02:29 Roe v Wade is coming back 1:06:58 No nerves before Trump 1:10:08 Mark doesn't wanna be HOME + Beef Tallow Deodorant 1:13:19 Daddy Mark experiences, Church + "Feel everything" 1:22:21 Gagnon merch = breast milk + Out with the baby 1:25:55 Homebirths should be illegal 1:30:14 Seeing the light, Reflexes + When do we see the baby? 1:33:40 Miles feels useless now

What's up everybody welcome to flagrant Alice converted to MAGA look at the pants Got a little love from the hunting community and now he's like, okay, let me ride this shit out I'm trying to go to was it honky tonk, Coachella. What is that shit called? Okay, obviously we gotta react to the trump interview, um, my reaction is trump is winning by a landslide We gotta react to the Trump interview. My reaction is Trump is winning by a landslide. Okay. It's not close anymore. Is that the energy y'all felt?

You're a prisoner of the moment. Yeah, you really are. We know that about me. We know that about me. Before Trump came on, you're like, yeah, it could go either way. It's very close. No, before he came on, I was like, he don't got a chance. I was like, he's coming on here.

He gotta be down bad. He gotta be down, I mean, no, we're the best. He gotta be down bad. And then after the interview, obviously we saw Trump coming on. He's coming on here. He's coming on here. He's coming on here. He's coming on here.

He's coming on here. He's coming on here. He's coming on here. He's coming on here. He's coming on here. He's coming over here. He gotta be down bad. He gotta be down, I mean, no, we're the best. He gotta be down bad. And then after the interview, obviously we saw the reaction. And you got 20 or 25 text messages and you were like, this guy's winning. No, it wasn't the 20 or 25 text messages.

You know what it was? It was the looks on the street. Oh, really? The looks on the street, I was getting, it was like, you know when someone who's trying to sell you drugs, they give you this nod? Like a person you don't know, like a looks on the street I was getting, it was like, you know when someone who's trying to sell you drugs, they give you this nod? Like a person you don't know, like a person on the street.

Right? They go, you would know. I don't think you would. They'd go, no way. Y'all have no clue how to buy drugs on the street. And I was like, I know that, though. I used to give that to people all the time. So they give you this nod, like, yo, yo, I got what you need.

That's all I've been getting for the last week. What a different racial reality we live in. Because that one again looks like. Wow, that's so interesting. You guys have had a different reaction. I lost 10,000 followers on Instagram. Well, our guy's as dumb as we're doing the Patreon. He's like, I just began so much hate in the past couple hours.

And we're like, why? He's like, well, I posted hate in the past couple hours. Yeah, we're like why he's like Well, I posted a picture of me endorsing Donald Trump He had a thumbs up, but I wasn't that tempted to be like... Just out of curiosity. Because it's so fun next to him. Hold on, hold on. Just out of curiosity, you're surprised that there was a negative reaction to you posting a picture with the most divisive human being on the planet. Smiling. He didn't post like a clip where he was asking a question or nothing.

You just did the fanboy pic. Yeah. I posted a picture with Travis Scott. I posted a picture with Kamala. No question. Oh, don't do that, please. Don't do the I have black friends thing that every podcast is doing. He has one. He has one. He has one. He has one. He has one. He has one. He has one. He's a work colleague. Yeah, I have one. He's not in this room, but I have one. No, no, no. That is a thing that I noticed that like pods, and we were intentional of not doing this

and there have been positive like caller daddy tries to do with Kamala and what's it called? And I think a bus into the boys did it when they had Trump on shot to the bus of the boys. But essentially what you're trying to do is control the reaction. So you're like almost like apologizing before you start. And that was one thing that we said we're not doing on it because there's nothing wrong with interviewing the Republican nominee for president who is already an ex-president. Or posting a picture with him. That's crazy. That's crazy. You're a big mega guy. Crazy. Crazy. You're a fascist fool.

I really am. I'm sorry, I appreciate good comedy, y'all. Don't. One of us is a student of the game here. I'm sorry. I appreciate good comedy. Y'all don't Andrews haircut for the past year You know looks amazing I felt it coming, I felt it coming. You just liked it. I did, I did. Wow, because he dissed me and I had something locked and ready to go, and then he just blew the podcast intro. That was smart. Good, good. That's why you do the podcast intro.

Honestly, Alex might win this election. I believe in Alex Nades. So Al was not having, when Trump called Alex bald, that was one of the most difficult things in the pocket. Yo, within, within. Do you know how hard it is to bite my tongue to not say something, man? Within 30 seconds, Al had whispered under his breath,

yo, your ear don't look shot. I said that like, I don't know. That was wild. That was a ballsy thing. I was shocked. All Trump had to say was, you got great hair. Why you hiding under that hat? And Al would be like, his ear damn near blown the fuck off.

What? What, he gets shot with a bazooka? That's crazy. How does he even hear us on the couch right now with that wound? I was gonna make a hair comment, but that would have ended the interview right there. Mark was nice with his hair comment.

Yeah, that was good. That was good. That was good. Yo, did you guys have any questions you wanna ask him now? Yeah. I did have one. You asked plenty. They just sat there smelling them.

I was smelling them. I thought you meant that you put it out there. Dude, the amount of people that have asked me like, yo, what did he smell like? Why is this the question? Okay, so one of the- He's not a single person, Axby Datch. No, I'll just ask that about you. Yeah. One of the liberal talking points that's knocking Trump right now is that he's apparently like shitting himself. And it's like. Okay, if that's a crime, lock me up.

You know what I'm saying? Like what are we talking about? Punch him in his stomach. What? Punch him in his stomach. We shit ourselves sometimes. You can't shit yourself sometimes? I mean, Mark, what are you raising your hand for? Shifting. Solidarity.

You shitted yourself? Oh yeah, he shitted himself too. Yeah, if he eats three bites out of a hamburger, maybe. Yeah, he can't eat beef. Who's allergic to red meat? You're like taking a shit in yourself. You shitting yourself all day. I shit in toilets.

No, no. Listen, why has this become a poop conversation? We're having a sophisticated political talk. The election is how many days away? Three weeks or something like that. Yeah. Okay. We gotta have like, we gotta be a serious podcast

for the next three weeks. Mm-hmm. Jeez. Yeah, come on. Come on, dude. That's funny. Okay? So, well yeah, the poop thing,

that was one of the talking points, that he's like shitting himself. He doesn't smell bad at all. Also, he's not 6'3". He's shrinking. Yeah, so definitely not 6'3". He's shrinking. Yeah, so definitely not 6'3". Okay. Yeah, 100%.

What I will say is my dad is also 81, and he used to be 6'1", six feet, and he's shorter. I'll also say that he does not have dementia, or whatever the fuck they're saying. He's sharp. He's sharp. He's sharp. And I have a father with dementia,

and I saw the signs 30 years ago with my dad. I know what, maybe 20 years ago. So it's like, I am acutely aware of how they are and zero sign of that. Not six three, you're right about that. I'd say six, six one. Yeah, but also 80. So it's like, you start to maybe lose a few inches.

Yeah. But anyway, questions that you guys really want to ask. Well, I was gonna ask, hey, have you seen Shane Gillis' amazing impression of you? Bro, did you see Blessing with the Boys do it? Yeah. And he was like, I don't know who that is, and I don't like the impression.

He's seen that shit because they asked him, they're like, do you know who Shane Gillis is? He goes, no. He's a million percent seen. Yeah, how do you not know? And then they're like, oh, he does this amazing impression with you. And then he kind of takes it and he goes,

I heard it's great. I know it's great. And then they moved the fuck on. I was gonna ask him. I was gonna ask him about the impression because I wanted there to be like a cool moment where he goes, I've seen the impression, it's the best impression, it's great, blah, blah, blah. He does like a Trump run on it.

And then that'd be like a funny moment. And then I was asking his team, I was like, does he like impressions? And this team was like, not a big fan of impressions. Not a big fan. So that's why he stayed away. He dodged it. Yeah, literally, me and him both.

I was gonna ask, have you ever talked shit about someone that were reddited later? Oh. That was one that we had talked about. Because on the call that he does with RFK after he gets shot, he tells him, he's like, yeah, Biden called me and he was so nice and friendly

and I was just talking shit about him, I felt so bad. And it was like such a candid, honest moment. I'm like, oh, he must do that all the time, but didn't ask. Just thought about my hair. Just thought about 100 questions I should ask and then just sat there terrified. It was tricky. Like, I was, I told you guys this, but like in retrospect,

what I wish that I did was I knew things you wanted to ask, at least one thing each, and then I lobbed it to you guys. But keep in mind, in this situation, they say you have an hour, you probably have around 45 minutes. We ended up going for an hour and a half because he was having a really fun time, and he basically, his team was telling us

we gotta wrap it up, and I would look at them, and then I would just look away. And they weren't gonna walk into the interview. I had told Dove in the beginning of the thing, I go, Dove, we're going to keep going until Donald Trump tells us this interview is over. Okay? He's the man in charge. And he told us.

Dove is so smart. He could have sat on the side with the Trump team. Right? Okay, Vala wants credit for that. So Avala, Avala. No, no, no, I was sitting with them. Oh, you were sitting with them. And they were talking to you.

Avala's texting me, I'm ignoring him too. So Doug, Doug, and no, no, this is how sophisticated Doug is. Watch this, watch this, watch, watch, watch. He goes to the other side so they can't talk to him. And then he does this. Before we start, he goes, everybody put your phone on airplane mode. Oh!

No. I didn't pick it up in the beginning. Right? Genius! The airplane mode is, oh, you were texting me? I didn't even see. They can't text him, wrap it up. Yeah.

Wow. I knew they were texting me. Wow. Shoot out of me. Love you guys, whoever was helping and supportive. But, listen, we won the election for, you know, it is what it is. If you wanna have a nice interview with, you know,

Alex Media is gonna make sure you win the election. You're such a sellout to your people, dude. You're a sellout. I saw you know Alex media is gonna make sure you win the election Your seller I saw you in a combo ad two days ago. How did she use me to that? You're shilling for the fucking liberals. You know they paid me 50 grand for that. That's pretty good. I got a licensing fee That's great $50,000. That's awesome I'm gonna donate to Donald Now we're? I'm gonna donate to Donald J. Trump. Now we're dongin'. I'm donating it! Yo, couple things, I was very glad, I said this to you, I was like, I'm glad Schultz is the one leading this, because the day before you said a lot of things that were helpful. One was about them telling us it's early.

They were like, they're gonna try to send it early. Nobody fucking look in their direction. We are ignoring them. Donald Trump tells us when it's over. He's the, they're gonna try to end it early. Nobody fucking look in their direction. We are ignoring them. Donald Trump tells us when it's over. He's the guy in charge. I listen to the president. Yeah. Exactly.

Exactly. And I like the team. Shout out to their team. Shout out to Alex and Jack. Thank you very much for making this happen. And the other thing you said was, 90% of the people are gonna have their opinions formed before they listen to a second of the episode

and you're not gonna change their minds. So don't worry about asking for everybody else. Ask the questions you wanna ask. And I was really happy you said that, that was really. Because the last thing you wanna do is ask something that you don't believe in for somebody else and then have that also get rejected. So now you're rejected for something

you don't even believe in, which is the worst thing. It's almost like on stage if you're pandering and then the audience, you still bomb, you're like, I double bombed. And I use my finite time to ask questions I think they might want me to ask the set of questions I want to ask. Ask the shit that you guys want to ask.

And it's still hard. I wish you guys, it's just, he can go. And you're trying so hard to get your question in and it's just, you know, it's a tough thing. So he, we do the pod. Pod comes out, right? And obviously we're all like, you know, expecting, okay, what's going to be the reaction to this?

We knew it was a great pod, right? Comes out, the reaction is like, reaction starts with the right. The right fucking loves it. They're like, finally, this is Donald Trump. This is the personality. This is someone who's got charisma. He's making comedians laugh. He's just hanging out talking. And they're like, this, this is the best interview Trump has ever, every headline is the best interview Trump's ever done, whatever. I expected that after it because I think we like kind of showed him as a man, right? It wasn't like a gotcha type of interview, which is not really our style. And like there was intention with that, you know, I think a lot of people that do the gotcha interviews, I think it's very narcissistic.

It's for you. It's just for you. It's like not for the people. Exactly. Like war it's for your, your fan base to just go look at you, you, you know, held the torch to him. But in my opinion, it's like you have an hour to potentially influence someone who might be the most powerful person in the world, to have empathy for something you really care about.

And he's listening to you. So how can we create a situation where he actually listens and he doesn't feel bullied? And like, there was a moment that you got him to say two things that he never said. Like a lot of like interviewers, they try to get him to say, to admit shit. And I know he doesn't present as a tough guy

because you see him with this like coiffed hair and he's in a nice suit, but I think his identity is that of like a tough guy, like a macho guy. He's a New York guy who grew up on construction sites. He's like, be tough. And when you try to bully someone tough, the reaction is, ah, fuck you, I'm not gonna do it.

But he was so comfortable that he said, yeah, we're gonna have elections, it was the election question. Of course we're gonna have elections and this is what I actually meant by, he never explains his positions, but he fucking explained it. And I thought that was a testament to like,

us creating a really good environment and you even setting up the question in a way Thank you, and yeah, I was just like I was really proud that we got to a point where we could even have that back And forth about America. Yeah, you know immigration even like yeah, that was awesome and the IVF obviously really important to me, but like I Asked everything that I wanted to talk to the potential president about. Yeah. And you even got him to compliment Gavin Newsom's hair. That is crazy. Not on my list, but glad we accomplished it.

Guys, I got some stand-up shows coming up for the Life Tour. These are the remaining shows of the Life Tour. We're going to Denver. We have added a third show there. Also going to Cincinnati that weekend. We had a second show there, Rama, Ontario as well. We're also gonna be going to Salt Lake City, we added a second show there.

Reno, we have two shows, San Jose, we added a second show, Portland, excuse me, Portland. And then we are wrapping up the tour, December 21st in Honolulu, Hawaii, at the Blydesdale Arena, I'm probably pronouncing that wrong. Anyway, thank you guys so much for coming out to this tour, it's been absolutely incredible. Hawaii at the blades the Blidesdale arena. I'm probably pronouncing that wrong anyway Thank you guys so much for coming out to the store

It's been absolutely incredible the adress roles calm for tickets don't get by the resellers go grab those I will see you out there Thank you so much peace also guys quick show announcement first of all stress factory We did seven shows sold them all out ten days in advance in advance, tried to add more. We could not. They have an event there on Sunday, so if you are procrastinating Indian, I'm sorry you're shit out of luck. I even tried to add another weekend because I love you so much as brown people, but my wife won't let me because I've been on the road, I think nine weekends in a row at this point and that's just not happening anymore.

Anyway, October 25th and 26th, Richmond, Virginia, November 1st and 2nd, Lexington, Kentucky. That might be the home of the Klan or maybe that's Louis's Louisville either way I would love for you guys to all show up Let's talk things out. Let's see what our differences are. Maybe we can make amends November 22nd and 23rd Rochester, New York December 4th Announcing this right now. I'm coming to Long Island. I've never headlined in Long Island I am mostly scared of you guys, but now that we interviewed Donald Trump, I feel like you're going to love me. I'm one of the good ones. So I will be at Governor's in Levittown.

Come through all those dates and more at AkashSingh.com. Also, we're still doing our thing on fan bases, dropping content there. So check that out as well. Now let's get back to the show. So right loves it, right? I'm waiting for the left fallout. Yeah. Right.

I'm like, okay, a day goes by, not really that bad. Second day goes by, I see a headline. Podcaster laughs in president's face. I'm like, huh, that's kind of interesting. Because I thought they were going to be like, bros, you know, just suck Trump's dick for an hour and a half, whatever. Then every headline is the podcast, it laughs in the present, the podcast trolls the present. And I'm looking at the internet and it's like,

the right loves it and the left loves it. Choose your own reality. I'm like, what bizarre world do we fucking live in? Where both sides, and it was like you said in the beginning of this podcast here, it's just like, you go in, you have the glasses on. And your glasses are whatever your political beliefs are, your religious beliefs, wherever they are.

And you view that same content through those lenses and that's what you see. I know this sounds like grandiose, but I don't mean it to be. It changed the way I see media. I used to think everybody was a liar, trying to fluff their base. Now, the way I think media works is,

there are some people that are honest and they just view it through their lens. If you're a right-wing guy that you like Trump and you really liked his charisma and you saw that come out, you're like, this is awesome. If you're a left-wing guy and you saw us laughing and joking around, you might interpret as us making fun of him, and that's truly what you see.

That's the first wave. The second wave are the people that see those headlines and they grift. They're like, ooh, Trump's best interview ever. Okay, I'll make a video on why it's that. And the left is like, ooh, they laughed in the president's face, I'll make a video on why it's that. And the left is like, ooh, they laughed in the president's face, I'll make a video on that. Every headline was copied by every content producer.

There were literally like two or three headlines total and everybody just made videos about it. And this is just algo, algo hunting or whatever. You know, like, what is that term? Were you like trying to find the algorithm? The algorithm. Yeah. Yeah.

And, but it helped me understand, like, I do think people authentically see things based on what they believe. So I have a little bit more, I have a little less resentment for the public. Okay. For content creators. Yeah. At least the first wave. The ones that just grift because they see the views, fuck them.

But the initial reaction, I go, okay, that was real. You're not just trying to fluff your base. It's a Rorschach. You really see what you want to see. And I think that applies to a lot of things. I feel like there's stuff I can even think of, like some social thing, or some guy says something about class and that it's misinterpreted

by a whole different contingent about race. It's like, well, I didn't mean it that way, but now I can see it if you're saying that like. That's what those people really see. Yeah, someone being just like, I love the cops. And then black people interpret that like, oh, you're racist? You love that those cops are racist.

You love that those cops beat us up. It's like what? No, no, I love that they like keep it community. But if you understand the black people's relationship with cops, then all of a sudden it can make complete sense. And those are the glasses everyone wears all the time. And the person that says, I love the cops, hasn't experienced maybe the treatment

that some of those black friends have gone through. And if he did experience that, he might go, the cops have always really protected me, and I have a great relationship with them, and for that I'm really grateful. And I've seen some fucked up situations with cops as well. But if you're only in your little echo chamber, you don't have the, I guess, experience to talk about that.

Yeah. Back to your point, where is the level of grift and I truly feel that way? Where does it start or where does it end? That's so- Because that's something I can't identify. Yeah, I feel a little more cynical than you guys do. I know that happens, what you're saying.

Yeah. But I think a lot of people are feeding their bases what they think they wanna hear. And that's the people writing the headlines. I don't know how many, I think, I tend to think the majority of them are, how do I get my, how do I appease the people that subscribe and keep them subscribed?

So- I think it's, if you make content, you're making it a little bit grifty, and it's like, you're just telling people how to feel. So I agree with you. I think that, and we've had this discussion before where like the algorithm, never in history were you able to know exactly what your base wanted

as well as you know now, right? Cause the algorithm can decide for you. So oftentimes like the algorithm dictates the content you make. We've talked about this in a pod before, right? And you see certain grifty fucks on the internet that basically, oh, okay, my base likes this, I'm just gonna feed them that.

And I think that we've been very intentional about creating the shit that we like, and hopefully we get an audience that reflects the things that we like. That means we might get half a million views on an episode with Dax that is awesome, I loved, and we might get four million on an episode with Donaldax that is like awesome, I loved, and we might get four million on episode with Donald Trump. But that's just what it is.

But I think there are people that have less integrity or they just wanna just make the videos that make the most money and they're just gonna run after it. We are also a little bit privileged to be in a position where all of us have another income stream. So we can kind of afford to do this, whereas some people, you have a page,

your audience wants this one thing, I can only feed them this because I don't have another income stream to fall back on. So we are in a little bit privileged, but even I'm not even lying, part of me was intentional in posting. I didn't think I would get that much blowback, but the picture with Trump, I was like, yeah, a couple thousand might unfollow. I want those people gone.

And if we were lucky enough to have a Democratic nominee, I would post a picture with them. I want the right-wing idiots to unfollow too. Y'all can go. Y'all can all go. I would like to curate an audience that's like, let's hear what someone has to say. I just want Magga. I'm Magga all the way. I'm a prisoner of the moment. And right now I will be a prisoner of that for the next 25 days.

When is the election? Yeah, I didn't want to ask him a question about policy. It was more so about, like, how does he truly feel? It's like in the 90s, early 2000s, he was loved. Before he got into politics, both sides loved him. And so I just wanted to ask him, now that you got into politics and you have large groups of people

deeming him as either racist or next Hitler and all that, how does that make you feel? That's what I wanted to know. Yeah, I really wish, yeah. I wish we had three hours. Because I would love to know that reaction, and I'd love to know that reaction an hour and a half into the pod when he was comfortable.

There was even a moment in the pod, nobody picked up on it, but where I think I asked him, I was like, how does it feel when these people say things about you that you don't believe are true? And he goes, yeah, I don't like it or it hurts. Yeah, it bothers me. Yeah, he goes, it bothers me. Like you're bothered by anything.

Have you ever heard Trump admit that anything bothered him? Yeah. But it makes me wonder though, like again, he's lived a fascinating life. Like objectively, we're trying to talk about this, like who's lived a more interesting life than him, but he's like best friends with Oprah all through like the eighties and nineties.

They're gonna run together. She jokes around like, we should run for president. Him and Howard Stern are boys and they're hanging out doing, you know, radio together. And then around like, we should run for president. Heyman, Howard Stern are boys and they're hanging out doing radio together. And then all of these people turn their backs on, they're like, this guy's gonna destroy the country. He's a racist piece of shit, da da da.

I wonder if that, yeah, like to that idea, like I wonder if it bothers him. I think it does. Like to that, I think what politics does is for most people, it brings out what you believe to be the best version of yourself. In other words, what is the most altruistic version of me? And I want that represented in politics.

Now, some people think that that is to be staunchly Republican, some people believe it's staunchly Democratic, right? But it's not indicative of who you know you actually are. Because you want your politician to be the best version of you. But you lose all nuance in that. And I think that's why you get a guy like Stern who's told crazy jokes and has had everybody on his pod and he's got strippers sitting on speakers and coming during the radio. And now he's like, I think that this guy is a piece of shit,

he's a dirt bag and how could anybody support him? And it's like, okay, because when it comes to politics, that's not fun. The stakes are too high. So I have empathy for his position too. Yeah. I don't write people off immediately like I did. And now that I know that it's not all,

how can I grift off of this moment, that people are actually impacted, especially when it comes to politics, I go, okay, maybe you're not being an asshole. This is what you think the best version of the world is, and you're gonna support that. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, so yeah, so it was awesome interview and everybody loved it. And then

a day later, Dove was like, Oh, by the way, the venue you're going to shoot your special and cancel your shows. No, damn it. Within three hours. After we interviewed him before the episode comes out, he goes to the venue. Everybody leaves. It's on Schultz's like special team. All of them. He goes to the venue. Everybody leaves, it's on Schultz's special team. All of them have to go to the venue, check it out. I assume everything is good.

People flew in for this. Oh yeah, so we've had these venues locked in for months now, month, something like that. It's not like we might do it here. It's booked, it's ready to go. We're going on sale this week. We have the entire production team come out. This is for the third time many of us are, you know,

spotting the venue and looking at everything. We have the set design already curated. We're moving around seating plots, camera, like, it's ready to go. We're going on sale this week. And we get an email three and a half hours out. After discussing with our board members, we don't think that it would be, there's email, you'll bring it up, but don't show any emails off. But it was a bam, Brooklyn Academy of Music, which is a venue they've shot tons of specials

in and three and a half hours after the interview, they cancel shows. So yeah, let's see if we can show the thing. Read the exact email because they're also they're they're canceling my shows but they're also begging Live Nation to not cancel future shows with them. Like they still want business but they're like just not this guy. Now I don't know if it's a Trump interview but the day before it came out we were ready to go and we're going on sale this week and three and a half hours afterwards we get this email. First off I want to thank you for thinking of BAM for Andrew Schulz's upcoming comedy show. We are always excited when promoters consider

our space for their events. After some internal discussions with leadership, it was decided that BAM is not the right fit for this show at this time. That said, we really do appreciate you reaching out. We'd love to work with you in the future and for future events that might be a better match for BAM. So if anybody has a venue,

if you've got a venue for us, that'd be really great. I'd really love to shoot this special and that'd be really awesome. The irony is this is your most personal special. Yes, yes, yes. Like it's not as political as that, it's you and your journey. Yeah, but also what's interesting about it is that Again, they canceled it three hours after the interview came out. So before the liberal media spun it In liberals favor, so if they waited two days

They get the hero. You're a darling of the liberals. You just gotta send him be like I laughed in his face Like you guys don't understand. Nah, fuck them. Fuck them and fuck them forever. Yeah, that's crazy. You gotta come to Queens, man. Brooklyn, it's no good. Yeah, what I understand. Staten Island, I think there's a nice theater in Staten Island. Brooklyn, I didn't know that you guys were assault.

There is one, St. George Theater, we're looking at. There you go. That's what you need. You need something union, something fireman goes to. You know what I mean? So, ladder 50s, Staten Island, where y'all at? Where y'all at? Can you just add something to that,

because I know I had to, I pitched what the hour was about in order to just discuss them, get them all on the same team. There were fans of, so touched by what it's about, people that know, know. And so I'm like, it's not like they don't think that this particular hour is gonna work for them. This felt personal.

Yeah. But they never specified though. Again, I can't say for sure that this is what it is. But before it came out, it was fine. Maybe after it came out, they familiarized themselves with me and then saw other things that they didn't like. That's also possible. But-

Haircut. It might've been there. I was thinking that. I was thinking that. Fuck. How did that. It's fucking dinklitch. Yeah. So now what? You're supposed to record this what? November? We were supposed to record it in a month. This is, yeah. There's been a wrench thrown and things. Yeah. I don't know. But yeah. You have any places in mind that you want to say out loud, or you?

I mean, we've been looking nonstop. And the tricky thing, I guess, why this is, maybe this is too much inside baseball, but most venues are booked months in advance. So now you're dealing with limited avails. But so we might have to do it during a weekday. It might be a little bit more inconvenient. Hopefully, everybody still comes out. That'd be really awesome.

I can buy tickets very quickly because usually these are on sale for months and months and we're going to have a short window. Yeah. And also because Andrew likes to change the seating plan in every venue he does, we also have to get approvals by the city that just make everything harder. So if you happen to own a beautiful theater in New York City or the tri-state area and you would like to open your doors to us.

Mega! No, no, no, that's not, we don't endorse that. We don't endorse that. We don't endorse it. Listen, I'm a, you know, what is it? My vote was up for grabs. The board of BAM has really pushed me in a direction. We have to stop this censorship.

We do have an invitation at 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue to do a special. Can we shoot it there? Hasn't there been enough shootings? Long Island, I think is your move. That's the move. Yes. They're gonna have plenty of love for you. Now what if we just get Kamala on and then they'll have you back? We would love to have Kamala on. There you go. You have her. We reached out to her team and they're not really enthusiastic. Yeah, yeah, yeah. They didn't listen to the show. I don't know why. What? Unless he was a patron. What do you mean?

Point is, the president is going to be chosen in a few weeks and the line is changing. Yeah. Looks like it's favorite trompito for victory right now, but you can obviously put your bread up. You know, steak is a place that you can, you can gamble on sports obviously, but I think we got something more important than sports right now. Yeah, we do. We have the faith of the free world. Yep, and you can bet on it.

Why not? How wild is that? It's crazy. You can bet on the fate of the free world. Really crazy. Yeah, it is. That's really the only way you can make money no matter who gets elected.

Yeah, that is true. That is true. Yeah. I mean, I guess there's some people who think they're gonna make a lot more money if Kamala wins or if Trump wins, but you, You're all wrong. The individual.

This is how you make money. This is how you profit. This is how the real working class can make money off an election. Usually you're completely forgotten. You're a tool, a cog in the machine, but not when it comes to gambling on the president. It sounds even crazy to say it but Stake is the leader in global betting and US social casinos. Bet on top sports and political

events like our fucking presidency and use the promo code flagrant for your welcome bonus. Now it's time to get back to the show we have more to discuss. The fate of free world. What do you guys think is gonna happen? Have you felt any change in energy? Like? Yeah, I felt a big change in energy toward Trump. And it's not even just our interview.

I just feel like the enthusiasm that Kamala had, and this goes back and forth, but right now the enthusiasm Kamala had seems like it's done. And we're gonna take all the credit for it, but yeah, it does happen around election time. But have you also noticed that kind of? And what do you think that that is indicative of? Like what happened?

Yeah, I think it's partially Trump doing like a big media blitz where he's just being himself. And then Kamala not doing an amazing media run. Like I think it's, to be honest, more her sort of missteps. Like the 60 minutes thing I don't think worked out well. The caller daddy thing I don't think worked out well. The caller daddy thing I don't think worked out well. And I don't think it's Alex's fault, I don't think it's anything she did. I just think the nature of the show and how Kamala handled the questions. I just don't think it played well in her favor.

Yeah, I thought she was good on caller day. I thought she was more thoughtful than I expected. I actually thought she was pretty good. I think we're just used to Trump. It's been such a long time of us seeing him say the wildest act crazy and now it's just like all right, we're desensitized to the madness of what this used to be. Yeah, I also think weirdly she's better off the cuff than when it feels very scripted. The Oprah thing? If someone comes in my house, they're getting shot the fuck up.

That's what we need. The debate, we all said it, she destroyed him. Unlike she's better off the cuff. And when it feels like, I don't know if they're a team or what, but when she tries to be very curated, specific, planned out in a way, it doesn't seem to go as well. Let her go.

I'm very curious to see her go on Fox. I think she goes on tomorrow, I believe. Yeah, good move. That's gonna be interesting. Really good move. You know she's gonna be attacked and how she handles that is gonna be very telling. I think, and I was talking to Sean about this,

I think that she's better when she's being attacked. I was just gonna say that. I'm thinking about her job. Yeah, it's a prosecutor. Prosecutor, yeah. Go on that, go on that. If your job is arguing with people, if somebody's attacking you, part of your job, you don't get to be DA by being bad at prosecutor. Yeah, go on that go on that if your job is arguing with people

If somebody's attacking you part of your job, you don't get to be da by being bad at arguing Yeah, and being bad in the courtroom indian woman, you know I have a fucking question. You can't handle it. Trump melted. I live with that. Yeah. It's so funny. It's happening in real time. You watch it like, oh, you fell for it. I fell for this for seven years. I know these tricks.

I know these tricks. But yeah, I think she can argue. I think that's part of her position. So when you attack, she just goes into instincts, which is this is my job is what I've done for decades now Here's your counter argument. Let's go. There's a there there's a there's a Moment well, not even a moment, but like I've watched some of the interviews that she did

I mean she did what is the guy's name Colbert then she did there was the 60 minutes and This she to call daddy and I think the unfortunate thing about a lot of these spaces And then she even I think did the view a little bit. Yeah, and then yeah I didn't see much of the stern, but I think the unfortunate thing for her is what? Just had to have her own stern back in the day. Yeah, sit on that speaker Let me show you my Whoopi Goldberg impression. Yo, that was crazy. Well, when stirring that, the black face up. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Anywho, dropped a couple of miles. Wait, was he saying it? Oh, he was dropping hard on? Oh wow, wow, wow, committed a bit. Yeah, he did. Anywho. I thought he was using somebody's hair. I think what basically happens is, I think when you're to the bit. Yeah, he did. I thought he was using somebody's hair.

I think what basically happens is, I think when you're set up in an interview, that's basically been curated so you win, all you're thinking about is losing. Oh, interesting. Right, it's like the questions are predetermined and you know that Colbert's looking at you and he wants you to be great

and he wants his audience to love you and they're fluffing you out and she's not used to this, right? She's a woman of color that comes up in the fucking justice system. Like she's a lawyer, she's a pro, she's used to like arguing and fighting with people. Being underestimated, fighting odds,

like having to go up the uphill. Like this is probably all new to her and all uncomfortable and maybe you don't even trust it. Maybe you're just like, nah, some about this don't feel right because this is not what I've experienced again for decades. We're not making excuses, like you gotta do better. You gotta win.

You should be able to take these puff piece interviews and then you should be able to dunk them home. That is the idea. She doesn't do well in them. And she does do well when there's some conflict, which is why I think the Fox thing is good. But I was telling Charlamagne, because Charlamagne's interviewing her,

we're recording this Tuesday, he's interviewing her today, and I'm like, yo, you might have to fight with her a little bit. I think that energy is actually better for her. And verbally, verbally. I mean, if she dodges a punch or two and then smacks Charlamagne, that might be her presidency. But I think the issue is, yeah, she doesn't do well when she's being supported.

She hasn't been supported ever publicly. Think about it. As long as she's been on the national stage, everybody has shit on her. When she's running for president, shit on her. The last, during the Biden presidency, shit on her. I don't think she knows how to be loved publicly. And then all of a sudden, three months ago, we're all like, oh, she's awesome.

And she's probably like, what? None of y'all like me before, fuck all of you. Because in the interviews, she does have this energy of, let me not fuck this up. What was that answer again? It seems like she's searching for the idea that she's supposed to say. And then she fucks up questions

that she should have a dialed in answer for. Yeah. Like pretty easy questions. It's hard to have a dialed in answer when you just got put in this position three months ago. Yeah, yeah. I mean, no excuse. Like you either want to be president or not.

Don't run her. Don't run. You can't, you ain't. She's the moment. She kinda didn't. She's good't run. You can't. She's the moment. She kind of didn't. Nah, she wanted it. She's in politics for a reason. But be honest, if you were running for president, you would want everyone to hate you.

She also, sorry, let me clear up. No. Let's clear up one more thing. She ran six years ago. Did you not have a plan six years ago when you actually ran, announced, lost to Biden? Did you not have any? There's nothing from that you can reach. I mean, I remember that.

That's that's what I wanted for America six years ago. Has it transformed so radically? Not even six, four years ago. Has it transformed? No, it was pandemic when she ran. You get a lot of the stuff she ran on. They are like crucifying, crucifying her for it now, like fracking and all that. You got to talk about it. I mean, she kind of just switched her position on it.

And she got a shit on Biden. And she's scared to shit on Biden. Which is so crazy. Was there anything you would have done different? Nope. Nope, that's a losing answer. But if you are gonna say no, explain why. Don't just say no and sit there.

So she's fumbling these interviews. This is my take on it. This is my take on it. Somebody get you to that position and you gotta shit on them. You gotta send them out of the river, motherfucker. Yeah, beat it.

There is a way to do it. And again, if you're running for president, if you're running for president, you should know the way to do it. You guys are sitting there, hopefully for hours a day, saying how do we answer this question? Because it is the number one question on everybody's mind. That guy's dead. That's a dead guy.

That's what I would say. I think in practice she probably has the answer queued up. And then I think she just too, like you guys pointed out, it's like she's too afraid to fail. You are really... What are you saying? This is it. Everybody hits the shots in practice.

Yeah. But the superstars are decided by who hits it in the game. I know. I'm just giving her a little grace. I know what you're doing. Why can't I give her a little grace? Or sports analysts of all kinds. Yo, give her a little grace. In practice, this guy's so good.

He's one of the best guys. Alex, you should meet team captain. That's why I'm voting for him for team captain. Ronnie just got to the league. Wow. It's a time, son. Fucking Lana Del Rey's husband. That's a great reference. That's a deep cup, I like that.

I need a picture to get a photo. She married a crocodile hunter. Oh, okay, okay. Oh, dude. Huge news in the Magosphere. We've all been talking about it. We got one. This is awesome.

Lana Del Rey, the singer-songwriter. Super famous. Almost as famous as Chappelle Rhone. Chappell, whatever her name is. H-O-T-T-O-G-O! I've got that shit. I've never not gotten it. There's a new one of these guys? I thought he died with a stingray. No, he just... He's an actual occupational... He didn's not he didn't have a tv show where he says crikey.

You think it's like a title? Yeah. Like crocodile hunter. Oh his job is just like he hunts crocodiles. Yeah exactly. Why would she marry this guy? Well yeah that's what we're all asking. I'm just getting caught up to speed. When you see him in the fatigues, but when he puts on the suit, he looks nice. Okay, okay. Okay, we'll go. Okay, all right, let's go. Okay, so. So real quick, so real quick.

I do think that assessing the energy, the shift that we've seen, I think a little bit, there's another observation I've had. And I think it's, there's a lot of Trump supporters in liberal cities that are terrified of like being outed as a Trump supporter, right? Like in New York, there's a lot of people who support Trump that will never let you know. They're really quiet about it. It's like on some fight club shit, like, I don't know about fight club. And then if you go, yo, I'm going to fight club, you're like, you're like all right Fight Club's kind of fire I go there a lot and what happened is when Biden was running

he was so decrepit that they got to pretend that they were supporting Trump because it was the best thing for the country. I don't like the guy but you know this Biden is so old I can't possibly vote for him so they like masqueraded as like, as the lesser of two evils. When deep down, they always liked Trump, but they were just worried what their coworkers would say. Et cetera, right? Not me at all.

So what happened is, when Kamala comes in, there's this huge media push and there's all this positive energy, and they get terrified. They go back in the closet, they're like, fuck, oh yeah, I guess she's really good. And we'll see what happens in the election. But they never stop supporting Trump.

She does a few interviews that are not the greatest. And then Trump does a few interviews that are really fun. And I think all of a sudden they got a little bit more bold. Then they started giving Kamala the Biden treatment. Like she can't even answer her question. She doesn't even know what she's doing out there. Like, I think unfortunately we'll have to go for Trump. But they were never not voting for Trump.

Yeah. You know what I mean? Not me. I know, it sounds like it. It sounds like it. Not me. Where'd you find the throne? I'm searching for the man in the mirror.

What are you searching for? I'm looking at the man. I'm looking at the man. Well, I'm searching for the man. Yeah, what Is it searching for? I'm looking at the man. Well, I'm searching for... Yeah, what's in your mirror? Are you a fucking vampire? Where is the... Where are these guys? Where the hell are we supposed to be in this thing?

I don't know where we've been found. Speaking of which, can we share the story that Trump told me, presidential orders, that I had to tell you guys? Oh, yes, please. This is awesome. Tell us. Well, this is technically, the first part of the story was told to you by someone else. Oh, yes, please. But you should tell it because I have no clue

Three milligrams of the sin right now when Michael Jackson was living in Trump town Why do you hold like you're Winston Churchill like you like like have this stogie? He's just like way Fire holding it between your Gumdo you just put your gums on, you just... That's how you action? That's how you action. Every drop, you're just going to jolt right to the brain.

Okay, go. No, you were telling us that this guy and then Don Jr. Michael Jackson lived next door to him. Yeah. And Trump Tower. And he would come over and play video games with the kids. Don Jr. I was doing research I was asking like as many people I knew that were close to him just give me like personal stories and Don told us about they were playing the remember the Ninja Turtles game for Nintendo you probably remember you might be old enough

to remember the arcade version there was a there was a Nintendo to the arcade game or something like that was fire but they also had it for Nintendo. Yeah. And like Don Jr. would tell me like, they never got, they had to work for anything that they got or it was a Christmas present. But that was like the rule in the Trump family. And they had saved up and they got this TX Mutant Ninja Turtle game. And they were playing, it was the coolest fucking game.

Him and Eric are playing it. And then Michael would come over and he was like, Michael's just kind of like a kid. And he would play some- You guys playing games? Yeah, exactly. So then he would play video and he was like, Michael's just kind of like a kid. And he would play some. You guys playing games? Yeah, exactly. So then he would play video games with them, right? And, you know, and Trump is just there like,

hey, he's never done anything weird. And he was playing and Michael was like, this is the greatest game ever. I've never, oh my God, what an amazing game. Did you say teenage? Yeah, of course I would like that one. And Don said that Trump walked in the room and was like, Michael, you like the game?

And he's like, yeah, it's the best game ever. And Trump goes, take it. And what any adult would do is go, I can't take it from these kids. Michael went, thank you, Donald. And Trump just left, right? So we were talking to Trump afterwards. We asked him, what was it like living next to Michael?

Yeah, and he was like, oh, it was amazing. He was the best guy ever. So sweet. But that Pepsi commercial really kind of changed who he was fundamentally. And we go, what? And then he- I completely forget about this all the time. And then Trump locked eyes with me and goes, you know the Pepsi story. And I was like, yes, sir. I was like, I had attention. I was like, whatever you need. Mark was like negative eight years old. But now he's not.

He has no fucking clue about it. He looks at me and goes, special orders from the president. Tell these guys the Pepsi story. And then Trump drifted away. And I felt such a pressure for the past week and a half just to share this with you guys. He basically said that, like... Okay, so what's the Pepsi story? I forgot to look it up.

It's been waiting on me though. Wow. No, 1986. Michael Jackson does it. Another commercial for Pepsi. Commercial number two. Professor Gagnon in the building. Let's go. And the firework goes off,

burns his head, second degree burns. Apparently, according to the article I read, due to the Jerry Curl cream that he was using at the time. Oh, they blame him, huh? Yeah, right? They don't blame the firework. Oh, what was he wearing? And landed on his fucking head.

Always with black people. Yeah, fucking ethanol on his hair. Even kind of black. Yeah. Yeah, he's black at the time. He's black at the time. Yeah, it's like an ethanol in there. Even kind of black. Yeah. Yeah, he's black at the time. He's black at the time. Yeah, this is apparently the thing that transits. Apparently, apparently, which also this is a debate

we need to have, me and Alex are talking about this, which Michael made better music, white or black, but we'll get to that later. Basically, hair catches on fire, second degree burns, him and his brothers, they put it all out. And then- You see Dove, look at, he's just listening to the stories, like, see, sometimes the missiles go to the wrong place.

See, sometimes there's whoopsie daisies all over the place. Why do you answer the beamer so close to his head? Anyway, he catches on fire, they put it out, and then he gets treatment for it. Did you hear that, Dove? They put it out. They put it out. Okay, go on.

They put out the fire. They don't videotape it in HD and put it all over Twitter. He had chronic pain from the injury and then was put on drugs from that and then he never shook the drug addiction and then it also affected his self-image which then caused him to get a ton of surgeries and which ultimately led to his death. I had no clue. I did not know the last night. Mr. President. I thought everyone knew. I fulfilled my duty. But you knew that, you knew, I knew that he got hit, but I didn't know that there were these like super severe burns on his butt. The Jackson Fine movie. Yeah, I know. He watched that every year, the series. No, I didn't watch that movie.

Alex, did you watch that? Yes, I did. Yeah. Come on. I didn't know that it really affected his self-image and that's where the surgery started coming from. Yeah. I didn't know that.

That's not true. Like he was already doing surgeries before that, but it fucked up his hair, and he cared about his hair a lot. He's a performer and shit, so. Of course, yeah. Damn, I thought we got like an inside take. No, maybe the drugs started during that time.

That could be real. We don't know when the drugs started. Got it, got it, got it. No one finds it a little weird that Michael Jackson's hanging out alone with his two sons? But we didn't know. I'm not even like, I remember that Ninja Turtles game that came out like 19. No, why is that weird? Well, here's the thing. Hey grown man, come hang and play video games. But don't you, don't you? Like, turtles forever. No, real talk, 30 years ago, we didn't think that like, now we're like keenly aware that there's pedophiles like way more than we thought they were when we were younger. Yeah. 30 years ago, we didn't think that like, now we're like keenly aware that there's pedophiles

like way more than we thought they were when we were younger. 30 years ago, and this is also before any accusations, I remember that game coming out, I was in like first, second grade. But what do you think that Don Jr. and Eric are thinking right now that they weren't chosen? That shit, I mean. It's because their father protected them,

and he like took the disc and was like, go fucking take it, never come back here. He said play these games, that's your crib. Yeah, never come back yeah and Don's like where's my game and his dad's like I just saved your life you have no idea what I just did for you I saved your butthole bro you almost saw a different turtle watch out turtle power alright guys listen we've been having our whoop competition okay yeah can we find out who's winning the whoop competition

yes not you Mark do you slide from 1.41. to 6.03 last night. I did? Yeah. Wait, I went to sleep at 1.41? Yeah, and you got up at 6.03 this morning. Your baby gets up at 6. You said that, right? Yeah, but how'd you know I got up at 1.01? No, I didn't. I got up at 4.15. Oh, I see the spike where you did get up. It looks like you got a little more. Let me tell you something. These women have a baby. They think they're the only ones that can sleep again. I tried to complain to my wife and our baby nurses when I was like, man, I didn't get any sleep.

I woke up at like, I woke up at four in the morning. And then my wife's initial response to that was, I woke up at six and you were passed the fuck out. because I woke up at six and you were past the fuck out. I woke up at six thirty, you were past the fuck out. I was like, yeah, I think I must have slept until like 6.15 or something like that. Or no, I don't know what the fucking timing was. That was a cool story, man. Woof, there it is.

Guys, I'm trying to deliver straight heat for this woof segment, but I don't have it. I don't have it because my recovery is low. Yeah, I'm trying to deliver straight heat for this whoop segment, but you know, I don't have it. I don't have it because my recovery is low. Yeah, super low. My recovery is low. Mark is winning with a baby, that's crazy. That is true. Something's off, Phil. I'm at five hours a night the last three nights

which is a step up for me. Well, you've been going on five. What do you think you've been doing differently? I just sleep in now. I just, if I got shit in the morning, I'm missing it. Really? Because I wake up at like four in the morning or whatever. And before I'd just be like, all right, well, I'll just get up at like 730 and do work. And now I'm like, nah, I just if I got shit in the morning, I'm missing it Really cuz I wake up at like four in the morning or whatever and before I just be like, all right Well, I'll just get up at like 730 and do work and I'm like, nah, I'm sleeping if I fall asleep at 7

I'm out till 10 cares. I think you should do that. Yeah, I think you should do that. Yeah, your energy seems higher I will say yeah, it's nocturnal. You're not insomnia. You're just not fully you supposed to sleep during the day Yeah, maybe maybe you're right. Yeah, you're like a little salamander. Look at your stupid fucking green, green whoop score is driving me crazy. Yeah, 185 heart rate variability, which apparently is good. That's insane. What does that mean?

How do you have such low stress in your life? Heart rate variability is directly linked to stress. The higher the number, the less the stress. I was at 37 with no baby. What the fuck is going on? Yeah, I don't know. I'm not complaining ever again. Here's the reality.

I am gonna stop, I'm obviously doing sober after, but I'm really gonna sober up around the last week and beat you guys the whole month. Come back like tortoise in the hair type of thing. Thank you. Thank you. My plan is to continue sleeping shitty and just really throw whoop for a loop, you know what I mean?

Yo, are you gonna throw whoop for a loop? I'm throwing whoop for a loop. Yeah, I kinda like whoop. That's great. Yo, you know who little dude bitches love whoop? I remember I like, I was trying to get the bartender's attention once, I was like going to not drink and I was like trying to, and then- Did you just put her mouth over your whole fist? Dude, she swallowed it up to the whoop.

No way. Yeah, like a bass. Yeah. Like she just juggled it. You're a noodle? I had to take it out of her mouth. I was like, Mark's grandma, what are you doing with this bar? I'm sorry.

Join.woop.com. Join.woop.com. I got a Southern Catholic right there. Chad. Join.woop.com slash flagrant. Yeah, join.woop.com slash flagrant. You'll get a gift basket if you sign up. Gift basket. They got a gift.. You'll get a gift basket if you sign up. Gift basket, they got a gift.

Don't you want a gift basket? Don't you want a gift basket? Deadass. Listen, outside of getting your health back, outside of measuring your HRV, well, one letter away from something you'd never want to have to measure. You will get a gift basket.

For real. Okay, but we will get out of the basket for real. Yeah. Okay. But we got to get back to the pod. All right guys, let's take a break for a second. Guys, being in debt negatively impacts every aspect of your life. Okay. Especially now with interest rates and the cost of living at all time high. The problem is that getting out of debt is very difficult and there are no good Problem is that getting out of debt is very difficult and there are no good solutions until now. PDS debt has customized options for anyone struggling with credit cards, personal loans,

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Now let's get back to the show. Anyway, so Christopher Columbus is a Jew. Yeah, isn't that so convenient? Thank God, I feel so guilty. Mark thinks that this is Russian election interference. Million percent. It's also exonerating white people. Take us to camp, Mark, take us to camp. I feel so guilty. Mark thinks that this is Russian election interference. Oh, a million percent. It's also exonerating white people. Take us to camp, Mark, take us to camp.

I'm saying, because it's basically stoking racial feelings in America, there's already animosity between Americans with just like Christian Americans that support Israel, and then obviously Jews in America that support Israel, and then you have Palestinian Americans, Arab Americans, black Americans that don't like Israel, and therefore that turns an anti-Semitic sentiment. You can just say white people versus non-white people.

The whites versus the losers, alright? And it's become a whole fucking thing. Yeah, wow. It's a big proxy war, huh? Exactly. So Russia benefits from there being dissent in the United States. So what do they do? They publish an article on Columbus Day. Hey, Christopher Columbus actually isn't white. He's a Jew. Exonerating white people. So now I don't have to feel bad about Native Americans because it was really Christopher Columbus, the Jews that did it. Yeah, sorry. The Jews did Native American genocide.

Before I had to feel bad about what Christopher Columbus did to the Native Americans. Yeah. And it fucking killed me. Yeah, you were losing sleep. I would lose sleep. You had a dream catcher over your fucking bed. Just to catch all the sleep you were losing.

Is that too far enough after what you did to these people? You know what, we're so sorry. I'm actually mad that we used to celebrate them and now it's indigenous day. I was like, oh wow. I haven't made that transition. Do you call it indigenous day? I'd never cared about the day.

As soon as I graduated and it stopped being a holiday, I didn't give a fuck about the day. It never mattered to me. You like those days off. We haven't got holidays off here in a long time. No, I'm kidding. What am I got holidays off here in a long time. Labor Day with Labor. Yeah. Thanks for being in Christmas.

That's about it. We just did a show in Columbus, Ohio. It wasn't Indigenous Ohio. You know what I mean? I feel like Columbus Day is still alive and well. The District of Columbia. That's fact. They've got to change that.

They should. Good point. Yeah. The District of Columbia. That's fact. They gotta change that. They should. Good point. Yeah. The District of... No. Do you believe this is true? Do the Jews run Washington, D.C.? I've heard that. It's named after... A famous Jew.

APEC? A famous Jew. Oh, right. Y'all are really crazy, dude. One of most famous Jews ever. What the fuck? That's crazy. That's crazy. Here in the most famous Jews ever. What the fuck? That's crazy. Here in the States, nobody wants to claim Christopher Columbus, but in Europe, everybody's

fighting to... He was Italian. He was Portuguese. He was from Spain. He was not. But that is actually the battle. It's between the Italians and the Spaniards. So we're just like, kind of makes sense because Sephardic Jews are from...

I'm literally from 45 minutes from where. Yeah, cut this, cut this. I know, I was waiting for you to just let. What else, something happened? Moroccan Jews. Can you cut this from the whole episode and then can you take this part and then just light it on fire and send me a video?

Yeah. Yeah. Thank you very much. Okay, but all right. Christopher Columbus apparently was sailing west to find riches. Did you? Did you? Checks out?

No. No, I thought he was... You're saying that's very Jewish of him. I thought he was going to kill Native Americans, but turns out he was looking for gold. I gotcha, guys. He's a pretty Jew. You know what? I don't want to add to this conspiracy, but 1491 is the Spanish Inquisition, right?

They kick all the Jews out of Spain. Some say that they took all their money and that's why they were able to go on these extravagant trips around the world to explore. But another way of framing it is, hey, if you're going to be a Jew and you're going to stay here, you're going to go find another way to get to India so we can get these spices. You better go. So maybe he was like a prisoner of the monarchy and he was punished with this trip to India. I just looked it up. Isabelle and Ferdinand also Jews. So they're all Jews. Everyone's. Yep. Isabelle and Ferdinand,

you're talking about the king and queen of? Of Spain, the son of Moab. Everyone's Jews. Are they really? According to Candice Owens' Twitter that I was just... It doesn't make it easier though. Like, it is like, there's so many variables in life. And if you could just distill them down to one, right? Like it just makes anything inconvenient to you. You know the glasses you were talking about before? The worldview, it just, the Jews did it.

Like, put on. Like Jesus, I will die for your sins, guys. Just keep on throwing at us another you big you fucking never ends with you guys It really doesn't it really really doesn't okay anything else anything else we guys learned you guys learned anything else You want to reflect on who do you think wins the election? Mmm, I think Trump he might have it. He's wow like I know polls are shit But he's doing better in polls now than he did in 2016 and 20 and he tends to overperform Relative to polling on election. Yeah, that's a good point That's who now some states apparently like Wisconsin had they last time they had Trump winning about like 16 17 points

And then I'm pretty sure he lost it or barely won it in 2020 But so I guess polling is off on both sides, but it does, the energy right now feels like it's toward Trump. I'm not even, Kamala needs to do more fun podcasts. Like this would be perfect. She tried to do Call Her Duty, what is it called? Call of Duty. What is it? Call Her Duty.

It's called Modern Warfare Call of Duty. But the fun thing, Call Her Duty, but she can't have- What's the name of the podcast? Call Her Daddy. Call Her Daddy. She's trying to bring duty talk back up. Yeah, and not stop.

But she tried to do Call Her Daddy call her daddy and have a good conversation. You know she should have asked her about the gluck. That would have been a good likeable. And that is a lesson that every politician. I don't know why my president is sucking dick though. her husband. Another one. He found an Indian. Okay, but we got to tell him like if she does get elected, ain't no sucking. Like I'm not going to have my president sucking during, you know what I mean? If I'm married, I'm not getting it. No, I want her to set the example. You want your wife to know you can be president you sucka know, you know, I mean I kind of like that Oh your entire president exhausted you've been up all night with a baby

Be more presidential man, yeah, that crazy, getting head from the president. That's fire. That's a Dougie Fresh. Was it Dougie Fresh or was it Montell? Was it both of them? Well, Doug Emhoff. But obviously don't do that, only do it if you really want to and it makes you feel good. Feminist.

I'm a feminist, dude. I'm a daughter. You're a girl, man. I can't let her grow up in some dick sucking world. You know, with a president out here. Yeah. Glucking. Oh, man. So. But can the, can a male president go down on his girl? Nah. Like, can Trump eat a box? I'm actually aligned with that. A male stand up comedian podcaster can't do that. How the fuck is a president gonna pull that off? I talk for a living. I can just push my nose into it after a long day. We call that scissoring. I feel like the right is taking back whole shit. Talk to us.

Because like, yeah, the left used to be liberal, be free the nipple, all that shit. And now the right is you got Hawk To A Girl, you got Carpenter, you got all these like, kinda... Are they right? Do you think? I think you just think white people are right. I mean, nah, but.

She's a carpenter, she's got a union job. She's a worker, she works late. No, who's the other one? There's another one. Uh... Not you guys. With the big tits on Euphoria. Sidney Sweeney. There you go.

She's right wing. Yeah. She's die hard. She's all right. Yeah. She's... You haven't seen her at the... Hollywood actress Sidney Sweeney is a... Her family's apparently mega. Yeah.

She was in Charlottesville with a tiki torch. They're not gonna replace her. Super mega, bro. Yes. Just because her family's mega doesn't make her awesome. Yeah. Wait, what? Yeah, she was in Charlottesville with the tiki torch Yes, just cuz her family's mega doesn't make her awesome. Yeah Yeah, obviously her family's really cool and smart and interesting but that doesn't mean that she is she could be another liberal cuck in Hollywood Yeah, I like this. I like this Andy Trump really made he mega made Andrew Greta. I know right Listen I don't know how I'm gonna vote, but if you keep canceling venues, like what am I supposed to do? That is true. I'm against censorship of me. Do you guys not stand with me?

There are guys in New York City that, you know, secretly like Trump, but then when their venues get canceled, they just have to be like, oh what do I do? I have to be a hero to stand up against censorship. Yeah, they're trying to cancel us. He doesn't poop himself, and he's really smart. OK, he's kind of all locked together, and obviously, free Israel, or whatever position he takes. Palestine, which one is it? Yeah, no, he has Israel.

No, he rides with Israel. He rides with Israel. OK. Dove? I mean, Dove made him sign his fucking Jew note. I'll with Israel. He rides with Israel. Yeah. Okay. Dove? Dove, I mean Dove made him sign his fucking. I'll support anyone who gives you his Jewish name.

I was so disappointed. He did. Dove went right up to him and said, can you sign my Yamaha? You could have, you should have just gotten your knees at that point. You should have had him sign Mike Litz, bro. What the fuck? I'm a hero in my community right now. Yeah.

Honestly, I think if Dove goes MAGA, he will find a wife. I genuinely believe that. Oh. I think if you go MAGA, you find a wife. Hot blonde bombshell. You mean if he goes openly MAGA? Openly MAGA. He finds a wife.

Yeah. It's right here, Dove. Right there. Moment, just be honest. Who do you think got badder chicks? I mean, if we're gonna have like a real sophisticated conversation. Yeah Who do you think are more attractive Kamala supporters or Trump support? I don't think it's question

Kamala Really? Yeah, really cuz she has more women supporters. No, I'll just into trance you've been to a Trump rally It's all fucking guys that look like Mark in 30 years. I didn't say hotter guys. You're like, what the fuck? But I'm just saying. Hold on. You just said that.

Hold on. Hold on. You got less women. I said, who got hotter people? And then you were like, dude, all the guys are so ugly. I said, if you go to a Trump rally, everyone looks like a 30-year-old. Which one did you go to?

How would you know? I mean. Sorry, guys. This is fucking much. Come on. I got to do some surveillance. Yeah, I'm gonna say Trump fans are probably hotter. But you got to pull out with them. You got to work on them. They're gonna keep it. They might keep it. But we might have swayed Trump. Yes, true. We might have swayed him. He was thinking about baron, dude. I think that, I think. Baron is dick in some girl's choice. I'm sorry.

Honestly, I think we might be able to get that Roe v. Wade back. I'm thinking Roe v. Wade's coming back. This is a Schultz awesome hot take. I think Roe v. Wade is coming back. I'm thinking about it. Undertaker. That's good. I thought I had a bad take, but thank you.

He bailed me out. It's coming back. I never had less experience that I do right now in this moment. No, but think about it. I'm going to say it with more conviction. Oh, that's what I did. You just got to say it over. Honestly, I think if Trump wins, I think we're going to get Roe v. Wade too. I think we get Roe v. Wade too.

I really think Roe v Wade too. I think we get Roe v Wade too. Bigger and better. Bigger, okay. I really think Roe v Wade's coming back. Cause what are we, we're one Supreme justice, Supreme court justice away? Yeah. I don't, I think we're a couple already. Just agree. Just say yeah. Yes, yes, yes.

Yes, yes, yes. Yes, yes, yes. Yes, yes, yes. Come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on. It's Roe v Wade too. It's Roe v Wade too. Yeah, okay. Roe v Wade, we That's the Roe v Wade 2, yeah. Roe v Wade, we can even rename it.

We can name it something else. So, if you wanna name it. I don't know, what do you wanna name it? You know the best. What do we, how do we get Roe v Wade back? Alex first Wade. Yeah. Wait, was Roe the one that got it?

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Were you anxious before the interview? No. Because you seemed eerily calm. I was thrown up in the bathroom two nights before, you were so calm, I was like this is nuts, dude Usually in a situation like that when you are meeting somebody that you're really excited to meet and you think really says everything correctly You're nervous, right? No, in all seriousness, uh, I

Thought I was really well prepared usually nerves for me are about lack of preparation. So if I'm nervous for a pod, I know I didn't prepare. I know I didn't watch enough podcasts with them. I don't know their flow. I don't have good questions. And I can't back up the things I want to ask. But for this, I put some time in. I was like, I kind of want to understand

what he's going to do. I knew that he can steamroll. I thought that we could control the conversation a little bit better, what he's going to do. Like I knew that he can steamroll. I know he's, I thought that we could control the conversation a little bit better, but he's a force. He'll just talk whenever he wants to. Yeah, he steamrolls. Yeah, but I felt, no, I felt kind of really comfortable. And it was, the feeling I had afterwards was,

who is a bigger guest than that? Yeah. Like is there somebody bigger than that? Obama. I don't think he is now. Fuck off. I would love to sit down with Obama. Don't get me wrong.

Fuck off. But like I don't think he's bigger. I don't. You're fucking crazy. This is lenses. This is lenses. Nah. I think if you go back during Obama's heyday, of course, he's the most famous person on

the planet, but I think now I don't think Obama's bigger than Trump. I think he still controls the party. I agree with you, but in terms of worldview right now, I think because Trump is running for president, he's more relevant. This podcast generated versus, I mean, I would love to have Obama, I would fucking love it, but yeah,

number of headlines, I think Trump is just gonna garner more headlines. He just is an attention grabbing human being. He said the thing that gets attention. They said you can't do numbers. That's what they're saying. They said, let's get O and C. Prove us wrong.

I would love to be proven wrong. Come on, I would love to be proven wrong. I think we'd have the best interview with him. I think I walked out feeling like we had the best interview you can have with Trump. Yeah, I think it was his best interview. And thought we asked for the most part what we wanted to ask I think all of us probably had a couple one or two things We would wish we could have gotten in but again your finite time he can steamroll you want to make sure he knows

This is a friendly space or like a friendly enough space We're not just trying to do gotcha moments dunk on you all things considered. considered, I just walked up to you and I'm like, that was great. Yeah, I felt really good about it. I felt really good about it. It is a tough thing to pivot out of conversation about politics now because I feel like it's the only thing that America cares about probably for the next month. And then we'll move on pretty quickly unless there's another event, hopefully there's not. But if there's a peaceful transfer of power, then Americans get back to caring about sports

or whatever else is actually important in our everyday lives. But everything gets viewed through these lenses right now. It's like, what are we gonna talk about, the fucking Jets game? Yeah. Right, like what is important to you guys right now? Mark had a kid, none of us wanna hear about that shit. Who gives a shit?

Who fucking cares, bro? Shit had the kids. The Yankees and the Mets are in the playoffs? Yo, nobody cares about that shit. Listen, I try to, Mark is so ready to be out, I try to tell Mark, I was like, listen, he's not coming on the road this week. And I'm like, but the next week and after, we only have one, we're going to Utah. There's two shows, like it's a far trip to go for one day. If you wanna just take another week off,

that's totally fine. And Mark looks at me, he goes, I'll be there. You're trying to reverse psychology me. You're making me a bad dad. I was trying to be a good dad with my child, and you were like, oh, just stay home. Hey, you know what, Mark, you just stay home. And now he's gonna grow up without a father.

Watch this, watch this. If it was up to me oh, just stay home. Hey, you know what, Mark? You just stay home. And now he's gonna grow without a father. Watch this, watch this. If it was up to me, I would stay home. I'm fucking staying home. I'm not fucking leaving. His wife's gonna see this like, you had the chance to stay home. Mark's reading the reviews of the show, he's like, come on.

Yeah, Derek Poston, guys, kill him. He's doing so good. Derek, you crushed, bro. You crushed, oh my God, no. Come on. Two person show is the way. Two person show is the way. It's the way. It's the way.

I brought that up in the pod. I think multiple people DM'd me like, yeah, I never even care how many people are on the show. No, that's not true. No, it's like an actual play. You need first, middle, ending. That's what we think. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

That's the natural order. It's the cosmic order. They're probably like, damn, we got out in a more timely fashion No, I thought this shit would go longer. Oh my god, Derek. Your new stuff is so fucking Wait, what is it? Oh my god, what is that camera to Derek? Your new stuff is so fucking good We cut this off. We just had you do double the time. What fucking murder? Tell us about your boy that sleeps all day like what is Turn it up. What is it?

What is it? Tell us about your kid that sleeps all day. Like what is the uh, tell us about that. Greatest things that ever happened to me. You know, who needs a career, right? Why does it even matter if I'm doing comedy ever again? You know what I mean?

Like nothing matters, you know? 100%. No, it's great. Best time of my life. What's something you're doing? You're like rubbing beef oil on you or some shit like that? No, beef tallow, okay? It's-

Y'all say that like it makes it more normal. It's not beef oil. Like weird misunderstanding now. It's all cleared up. Beef tallow, okay? Y'all say that like it makes it more normal. It's not beef oil. My weird misunderstanding now. It's beef tallow, okay? No, it just rejuvenates your skin and makes you look younger. Perfect couple over here. I mean, I've never looked younger.

What are you talking about? I've been buying you beef tallow. But why, for what reason? So I can look good for my son. Wait, why do you wanna look good for your son? No, I've just been using it because the last couple of weeks, I got a jar, Elise just been using it because the last couple weeks I got a jar, Elise has been using it and I was like, let me try.

And I like how it makes me feel. What is the purpose of it? Is what we're asking. It moisturizes your skin, makes you feel good. Oh, it's like mud. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You know. Indie has never beaten these mud allegations. Every day I get a new video. It's kind of crazy.

We need to put a stop to it. Yeah. Why? Our skin is fantastic. That is true. Fucking A, they do incredible skin. Y'all could use some mud, be honest with you. We do the mud masks. Yeah, literally.

Y'all do mud baths. You go to the Dead Sea, what do you do? Mud it up. White people take their trucks, what do they do? Mud it. Mud it. You know what I mean? But y'all gotta get out of the car and do the mud, and that's the thing.

Yeah, no, we're just scared. I mean, beef tallow is just as crazy to me. Yeah, to you. Yeah, that's true. I feel like you did that shit to offend me twice, to be honest with you. Okay, well, do you have any observations on being a dad? Absolutely. Or having a kid?

I texted you a bunch. On Camp Gagnon, you can see all of them. Come on, make a chair here. Go listen to Camp Gagnon this week. I texted you a bunch on camp gang on you can you can see all them? Gang on this week. No, no you want to talk about it Right now top five conspiracies The medical industry is lying to you. Okay? Why are you even going down this one? Medical industry is lying to you. Wait, go, go, what is this one? And God is great.

Just remember both those things. No, it is great. You went back to church for the first time in a while? I did. And how was it? Did bring the kid though. Oh, why not? He was crying.

You're not getting fucked. Fuck. Why? Why risk it? Still not all the way back here. Still not all the way back here. You need to vet it. Right?

You need to see who's really here. What's up with these altar boys? Scope it out. My hair's shaking. Bro, it's so funny talking to the guy that does the collection mask. I was talking to him after about church, and he was like, it's just this old guy, Italian dude. He's like, oh, back in the 80s,

this thing was packed wall to wall. You couldn't even get a seat. Now it's just fucking six homos and a homeless lady. I'm like, what? He's describing the church like, this whole thing's gone to shit. Really? Yeah, he was pissed off like describing the church, like this whole thing is kinda shit. Really? Yeah, he was pissed off. Did you ask him if he knows who the best tippers are?

What do you mean? He does the basket, right? Okay. What do you call tipping? Yeah, you're tipping. You know, you did a good job, guy. You know, fire sermon. But that is kind of what it is, right?

It's like, yo, God, this week you did a good job. That is what they say in the South, though. Why, to have waiters,? It's like, yo, God, this week you did a good job. I'm alive. That is what they say in the South, though. To have waiters, they'll be like, why'd I have to give you 15% if I only give God 10? Ooh. Bars. Bars, because God doesn't know about inflation, okay?

That's one of the biggest reasons. There was a comic from Dallas, I forget what he was, he said he's a waiter and that's what he'd hear a lot, and then he would say to them back, because one of us is real. No! No! Disrespectful.

Damn. Rude. Damn. Wrong. Yeah. Disrespectful. Damn. Rude. Damn. Wrong. Yeah. So tell us about your experience in church. I didn't ask him about the chipping situation, but he did come up to me with the fucking stick

eight times with the basket on it. How much did you do tip? You just had a kid. I didn't have, they didn't do tap. If they did boop, if I could tap to pay, then I would have, but I- You just had a child your first time back in the day. You're stealing cash.

I'm not gonna keep it. I'm not gonna have cash on my kid. It's so dirty and nasty. Where do you think you were doing? He gets paid minimum wage, bro. My kid does not get paid. No, God gets paid on tips, bro. Yeah, I'm not gonna carry money,

put it on my hand, and then touch my child, okay? Yeah, you could just wash your hands if you fucking didn't come poop. You put beef grease on yourself. It's all good. There's nothing more natural. There's nothing more natural than beef grease, okay? And he's come to love the smell, for the record.

He takes a nap on my chest and wakes up and just pulls his whole head away. He's fucking down. He's sleeping on leather? Yeah, like he's on a slip and slide, it's insane. Why are you giving your kid facial hug? Yo, that is crazy. This shit is crazy.

Okay, are you allowed to make decisions for the child yet? Or? Too many. What? Just give me the kid, she's like, I'm gonna take a shower. If he starts crying, just don't tell me. I'm like, okay. How the fuck do you get that?

I feel like I'm a kid. My wife don't let me do shit with this kid. I gotta ask her, can I give her a dried cranberry? And my wife would be like, half of one. Wait, so you just get to do whatever you want with your kid? Whoa, whoa, not whatever I want. Where's your brain going? I'm not going to give him a cranberry.

I'm not going to give him a cranberry. He can't eat it yet. OK, fair enough. But no, I ask. You know, I'm just like, I don't know. But I ask shit. But neither of us really know exactly what to do. You kind of figure it out.

She knows everything. She has read every single book. She has watched every single video. They know every single thing that's going on. I think it kind of helps to freestyle though. If you go in too prepared then you only know like four different ways. Like he was crying the other night and I was like what if you do this with him and I just like kind of put him kind of down shook him a little. Yep. And he stopped crying. Yo can I say this about real quick they say that and I and this is a very important thing to say, shaken baby syndrome is a thing where like, the babies could die when they get shaken too much. My kid loves it.

But here's the thing, we never talk, no, no, that's the point I'm trying to make. We don't talk about how much fun it is when you shake, they love being shaken. They love it. So I almost have a little empathy for the people who shake them to death because before death it was like a roller coaster. It was like the most fun they've ever had.

It's like ODing. Yes, you just like dance with them and they're just giggling and you're like, well I like a roller coaster. It was like the most fun they've ever had. It's like ODing. Yes, you just like dance with them and they're just giggling and you're like, well, I do this even harder. Exactly. And then, you know, catastrophe. Yeah, you gotta stir them.

I'd do more stirring. Just kinda like, kinda moving them around. But no, it's been awesome. You asked me what my thoughts about Fatherhood are and I sent you a text of maybe, you know, 10 or 12 different thoughts. Let's just pretend he didn't read it. No, what did I say?

And then he just responds, he goes, yeah man, just feel everything. I agree. Well no, let me read it too. I'll pull it up. These are some of the initial thoughts I had. First off, I had this crazy thought. We had the baby in the apartment.

That's a long motherfucking text, Doug. That's crazy. Ain't nobody reading that shit. I just said the same thing back. Ain't nobody reading that shit. I just said the same thing back. It looks like you. Just feel like it. I really said back, he sends me this long ass text,

I go, yo, do me a favor, check out this edit that I sent. Nah, nah, that text looked like you arguing with your girl right there. I was feeling a lot of things, bro. She writes that whole shit like, yeah. Oh, wait, you were what? You were what? I was feeling it.

That's why I said, feel what you gotta feel, what? I was feeling it. That's why I said feel what you gotta feel, man. I was feeling it. I didn't wanna, in that moment. Let's just do a word count comparison. No, no, no. Let's just see how many words you wrote, Andrew, versus how many words Andrew wrote back. I'm trying to find it, bro, that shit is deep.

It's so far. Oh, here we go, I got it. Oh, wow. Okay, this is a lie. So they don't fit the iPhone screen. It's a lie, it's too much. They don't fit fit the iPhone screen. It's a lie. It's too much. They don't fit a phone actually. It's a lie. He wrote this long ass gay thing.

And I said, I said, these are all great. Write down all the thoughts. They will change. You'll forget some. Some will grow stronger. Good to reflect on all the moments. I didn't read that shit. That is 100% saying I didn't read that. 100%. But a nicer way to say it though.

That is a nicer way to say it. Hey, these are all great. Yeah, yeah. Anytime anybody says these are all great, he didn't read none of them. No, probably none of them are great. Okay. No, some of them are great.

Actually, I really wish that I didn't read any of them because that is the funniest thing, but what I remember experiencing in the hospital while your wife's asleep, the baby's asleep, and you're just by yourself and you feel, like everything is on a million, right? Every sensation is times, a hundred, and you have all these ideas

and everything's going through your head, and I started to write some down, and I wish I just wrote every single thing I thought down, because you forget them. You talk to any parent, and the feeling they have when your kid was like three months and when they're not, they're completely different. So in that moment I didn't want to influence anything.

I didn't want to be like, yeah, but what is it like when it's like, I just wanted you to have unadulterated, is that the word? Unadulterated feelings and just remember them all and enjoy that moment. That's why I didn't want to impact it. No, I knew that. I knew that. I'm just messing with you. But it was a beautiful thing. Your emotions definitely do come online in a way that's like insane.

Like it's like the closest thing is doing drugs. Yeah. Like doing mushrooms. And then afterwards, you're like, oh, I see the world in a different way. But it's like a clean high that doesn't really go away. Yeah. Like it's like just natural. What has been the hardest thing? Oh, I just adjusting the schedule, like adjusting to like time and like like when you get married, now you have like a different time commitment and you can't just do whatever you want. You don't have to be like, hey, like when you get married now you have like

a different time commitment. And you can't just do whatever you want. You can't have to be like, hey babe I'm gonna be out. And she's like, yeah go ahead, but you gotta like check in. And then when you have a kid it's like that times five. Where it's like, hey I'm gonna go out. She's like, you can't because we gotta do this. You know like.

This is the first time Mark can't do whatever the fuck he wants to do. Yeah. It's shocking. It's a shocking system for him. Motherfucker was getting drunk the other night. I know, he's still doing it. I got over-served. It's not my fault, okay? Just went out with his family.

His brother's coming up to town to help out with the baby. They just go and get fucking shit-faced. Mom taking him to bars. Sister-in-law was there. She was helping out. Oh, she was? Exactly. You guys are doing a great Sober October, I see. Whoop is having another girlfriend. Thank you!

I said, oh, you went to bed so late, and you've been drinking so much, and you never fucked me. And I was like, why is that on the app? It's fucking weird. No, they did fuck all the time, man. But it's wild, bro. There's so much sex. You have so much sex once you get married, dude.

And have a kid that goes up like a million times. Like, whatever, listen, a lot of people talk about when you have a kid or whatever, you don't have sex, that's a lie. You fuck so much. I'm exhausted from all the fucking I've been doing. I haven't jerked off once in every hotel that I go to. I haven't jerked off a single time in every single hotel. I feel bad for the people cleaning that shit up. I be grabbing pillows to wipe.

I feel like, what, who is it, Alex? You grab whatever's there. I just go on the other side of the room, and I'm like, what, who is it? Alex? You grab whatever's there? No, I just go on the other side of the bed that I don't step on. I picked up the mattress. I just knitted in that shit. I think about, fuck!

I'm getting addicted! Oh, man. We interviewed a president last week. No, but shout out to the Marriott Bonvoy or whatever. And the cleanest staff. Y'all are the best. Fucking Marriott Bonvoy. Bonvoy.

This cigar in the mattress and just twisted it in. God bless. But yeah, dude, breast milk is fire. Oh, did you enjoy? Yeah, that was good. Yeah. Straight is fire. Oh, did you enjoy? Yeah, that was good. Yeah? Yeah.

Straight out the tip? How much you drinking? Just a little sip, not out of the tip, out of the little cup. Yeah. Out of the tip feels a little weird. Cause that's his, like I don't want to double dip. You know what I mean?

Don't it seem like Marty's the kind of guy who would just drink breast milk instead of regular milk? Like that's just the rules. The health benefits, you would have no idea. First off, not pasteurized, which you don't need to do that with milk. We drink within two weeks That is actually true. They basically purify. It's like shelf stabilize. It has no nutrients in it That's why it gives everyone fucking eczema. All right, just look into it

Yeah, I've actually heard this I'm selling on pasturized milk after all my shows if you want to see They have unpasteurized milk. Come and join us. We got beef juice. When can we see the baby, yo? Soon. Is it like, cool for us to come? If you came to McSorley's last night, we were there.

Wait, did she bring the baby up? No, she didn't go out. We did go to a restaurant, and the baby just chilled with us and slept the whole time. Wow. That's awesome. So I went to Apple Store, I just saw the dude, he was like, oh shit, Mark was just in here with his baby. I was like.

I wanted to show him the vision bro too. Dude, it's like two weeks old. How the fuck is he out there? Oh my God. That shit makes me uncomfortable. I'm chilling with the baby, I'm going through all this shit with him, walking around and people are like,

that is too new to be out. Like, he just got here? Why is that kid even out the house? And I look at her and I'm like, oh my wife told me to do it for a walk. I didn't bring my dog out for a month. This motherfucker's out in two weeks. We were literally, we were drinking, the kid, look.

It's crazy. It's crazy. I remember my daughter first seeing her son like six months in. Yeah. She said, what the fuck is this? No, I got parenting advice from a close source. Your mom?

Okay, I said, Casey Anthony. And she said, she said, let the kids go into your life, okay, so just fucking, unfortunately for the kid, we like to get shitfaced and make sorolies on Saturday, and so the kids part of it. Like we just go to the restaurant, we put the kids strapped in my chest. I love bringing the baby everywhere. I am very Arabic in that way. Yeah, I feel like Arabs do that the best. I wouldn't make that an Arabic trait. Yeah, that's what the Arabs are known for. Strapped into their chest. It's a, I know it's sensitive.

Really enjoyed that. Did you see Dubb? Oh, did he laugh? He like, he wanted all of us to know he found it funny. Okay? No, but I feel like Arabs, and Dove is kind of an Arab, I feel like Arabs, they take the babies out, you know, especially when it's like Ramadan, you see the whole family out, it's like midnight and the kids are running around. It's awesome. I love it. And it's also so hot in the fucking day that you go out at night. That is also probably something to do with it.

But I think culturally, they just take the whole family ever. You say the Indians do that too. Yeah, but I didn't know this young. We're not going to bars and getting drunk. We go to each other's houses and get drunk. Fair enough. Fair enough. Yeah.

But I like that. I like taking the baby everywhere. I wish the baby was in that room right now. I do think there is something to not over protecting and not all, but it's just very funny to bring the kid to the fucking Apple store Where it's constantly jammed have you seen the vision Pro 2 that's my question. I feel like you're not even considering I don't think he saw the vision Pro 2 to be honest. He was asleep But if you've been away, I don't think he has vision you want

Mostly seeing black and white he's got dog 14 He's got dog food for 15 days old dude. It's 14. Okay. Don't hate it. Jesus. He's been doing beef towel. He looks seven For real he looks it doesn't look a day over a week it's awesome, but yeah, dude It's been we did the home birth which that shit should be illegal It was crazy At what point are you like? Why the fuck can't we get a hospital? I was getting gas lit. I mean, no, it worked out amazing.

My wife is a midwife that does home births and it was fine. But there's part of it where you're like, this is crazy. Do you think when you just said that, the audience was like, oh, phew. Oh, his wife is a job from the 1600s. Oh, then fine. You're good. You're safe. Yeah, you're fine.

Okay. Was there any point where you're like, we need to go to a medical facility? No, not that I was actually concerned, but like, when I look at the midwife, I'm like, is this fine? She's like, yeah, we're good. And I was like, all right.

Like, we're like 20 hours into this. We're just in the house. No, but Daryl's also fucking. Crazy. No, no, it's insane. Not even an African. That's insane. Well, did I tell you this, that I stubbed my toe during the labor. No, but Daryl's also fucking crazy. No, no, it's insane. It's not even an option. That's insane. Well, did I tell you this, that I stubbed my toe during the labor?

Yeah, yeah, yeah. And I had to tell her, I'm like, I stubbed it, pinky. She was like, oh, that kinda sucks. Yeah, it was fucking awesome. She's got a head and a shoulder coming out of her vagina. Yeah. It's waddling over to get to a band-aid.

Yeah, but no, it worked out great. Everything's fine, no issues. We labored outside. What does that mean? So like 20 hours in, baby's coming, the eight centimeters, okay? And the midwife is like, you know what? You guys should go for a walk. Not like you. All right, let's see. Oh, you get things moving.

Get things, yeah, I guess. Or maybe they wanted to take a nap. I don't know what the reason was, but we went outside and we just went. Tired of smelling your fucking feet, Calo. So what happened? Where do you walk? To a local taco stand. And you ate? No, no, we didn't eat, but six in the morning, we just like walked up through.

That's the crazy part. I'm just saying, she's about to be pushing, you know, diarrhea flying out as well. The last thing I'm eating is tacos. It gets things moving. It gets things moving. The Latinos know how to deliver. You know what I'm saying?

You gotta trust them. But no, we just like walked around, she would have a contraction every couple blocks in front of the church just screaming, ah, God, why did you do this? And then people on the street walking past us, like three golfers see us and they're like, have a good day.

I was like, all right, see you guys. I thought we were gonna get robbed. I was like, the idea of getting robbed on the street with the baby on his way out would have been fucking crazy. What do you do in that moment? Because you wanna prove to your wife that you can protect her. Yeah, that would be tough.

But at the same time, you know, she's like having contractions, you kind of just got to cough it up. Yeah, be like, you want a baby? Oh, yeah. Okay, do you, are you very like a sweet with the child, very like kind and cuddly with it? Yeah. Or is it, okay.

Yeah. Is it, there's no part of you yet where you're like, okay, I got to make him a man. No. Okay. No, he'll figure that out. Not yet. Yeah. I don't know, I have a like, okay, I gotta make him a man. No. Okay. No, he'll figure that out.

Not yet. Yeah. I don't know, I have a daughter, so like I've only been gay. All I do is I just like jump around, like I feel no pressure at all to like make the kid tough. Yeah. Like if anything, I want to show her like the sweetest side

of a guy, cause she's gonna deal with the asshole shit her whole life. But I imagine with a son. And she should know what not to put up with. Exactly. Like if this isn't what I'm used to, I'm out. Yeah, like she knows that this is something that exists out there.

But I imagine with a son, and I don't know, but I imagine there's a point where you want to be like, all right, stop crying, you just fell, it's gonna be okay. Or there's like a little bit of a toughen up thing. My dad wasn't like that with me at all. But I also still like this regularly. Yeah, I tried to do that with my nephew. I started a little too early.

What do you mean? What do you mean? He was just learning how to walk and I was like, gave him a little nudge. No, no, no, no, no. You abused him? No, I was trying to like, you know, get him stronger. Yeah.

Walk, right? He fell and no one in the house liked that at all. And yeah, I learned the hard way that you shouldn't nudge a kid while you're trying to. But does he walk now? He walks really strong. So there you go. I think it's all because of him.

Walk it off. That's literally where he came from. He's not gay because of me. It was that one kid. It was that kid. I mean, yeah. No, I just nurture him. I just love him.

It's great. He sleeps great. That is the thing that scares me about having a son, because just like my little cousins who were guys, I was so fucking like, shut up. Like I had no softness for them whatsoever. But my little cousins who were girls or whatever, so fucking like, shut up. Like I had no softness for them whatsoever. But my little cousins were girls or whatever. It's like completely soft, completely like this. I have no issue. Like you said. Yeah.

This is easy with a guy. I have no patience. Yeah. When can you start like roughhousing with a kid? Immediately. Yeah, I kind of doing that now. We got flying. So I just put him on my own. You should just shake the fuck out of him. Oh, you stir them. OK, you can't shake them.

Just a little gentle rock. You can't shake them. Double O7. But yeah, it's awesome. I was thinking, how crazy is this? When you're born, how about this? When you die, what is the stereotype of how you die? What do people say you see?

A light. You go into the light. And when you're born. You go into the light. Bro. Cut this. Didn't you grow up in a slum? I know that.

I was like, all right. You're born. You go into the light. Bro. Cut this. Didn't you grow up in a South American family? I was like, alright, where is it? But it is crazy though. Maybe death is ultimately the great rebirth. That was prophetic. Yeah, no shit. Three days ago. Okay, I'm finally getting on board. Then maybe the light is just the pussy of the universe, you know what I mean? You're just flying through it. Think about it. That's why I said feel all the feels. Yeah, gotta let them get it out. You say it to your friends and they start shitting on your theories about life. And then you feel insecure when you're just at the greatest moment. Yeah. So I didn't want you to have that. He wants you to write the doubt so you could remember the stupid shit you said.

The thing that did blow him on is the reflexes like when you're born did they do all the reflex testing with your daughter? No. I'm pretty sure they did, because I think they had to do it at the hospital. Nope. No. No.

Legally they have to. Nope, they gave her to me, she tried to latch onto my nipple, and I was like, we not making you a lesbian immediately. Wait, what? She did, she went right for my titty. How would that make her a lesbian? Because I was eating bread, I was eating so much bread.

I don't know, it's like the negative numbers or whatever. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I actually, I can do this. Yeah, yeah, yeah. No, they do these reflex testings where they're like, alright, the kid has a reflex to walk. They put him down and his legs will go like this and they'll start to walk.

And they have a hanging reflex where they know how to hang on to shit. That is true. They can hang. That's crazy. And they can do pull-ups. Yeah. Like somehow we get weaker. It's crazy. Yeah. And then they have like a startle reflex.

You put them down, they startle. They have a foot reflex where you rub their foot and their toes grab it. No, their toes go out. And then it switches at like a couple months. And it's like all that shit is programmed in there, just baked in, downloaded on the hard drive, right when you buy it. Yeah, I don you buy it. My wife was just bleeding out

so I was trying to make sure she didn't die. I had to take care of my baby all by myself. I was like, yo, you got that with the toes? I'm gonna cauterize this woman real fast. That is a good point. The neighbors were freaked out though. Wait, why? Because they heard the screaming. Yeah, yeah, yeah. They left us a gift which is very nice. What was it? It was a baguette. Nice! Yeah, they're French. Yeah. And so they gave us a little baguette.

Yeah, when is like the official, you know, we get to see the baby party? I don't know, this weekend. Fuck it. But it... I don't know, do you do like an event? Different... moms are different with things, you know, so like, Emma was very, you know, it was hard for us to get pregnant, she was very concerned, so I think she was really protective

and I didn't want to, immediately I'm like, let's show the world the coolest thing that we've ever made. And she was very much like, okay, I'm worried about the baby getting sick or something like that. So I'm like hesitant to put any pressure on you or to share the baby with us.

But now I know that you're taking him on the subway three days out. Yeah, doing petty crime. And yeah, it's fine. No, I'll bring the baby in, it'll be awesome. As long as everyone washes their hands and don't touch him and shit. But I don't have to worry about you guys getting him sick

because Akash already got me sick. And I was running a kid. I got me sick. So, yeah, we're already fucked. Okay, long story short. Did the baby get sick? No, baby's fine. Baby's breastfeeding. Mom has antibodies, it all gets passed through.

God has a great plan for this, okay? And ultimately, I think more people need to go to confession, start going to church and just be on fire for Christ. Yeah. Okay, Miles. Yeah. I don't know. I didn't have a baby.

Miles has been pissed about the baby. Miles and my cat, they're both just like, so what the fuck am I supposed to do? Oh yeah, how useless are the pets now? It's kind of sad, right? You don't even like, they're just like a surrogate for your love and the second you have something actually to love, you're like, get away. Yeah. My god.

No, but a cat is more petty. It sounds so bad, like, because every day I come home and my dog is so excited to see me and I'm just like, get the fuck out of my way so I can see my daughter. I feel so bad like because every day I come home and my dog is so excited to see me and I'm just like get The fuck out of my way so I could see my daughter. I feel so bad. I really there's a little part of you feels guilt about it But they are the best they're just Every day the dog keeps showing up Knowing that they don't get as much love as they used to not my cat change the cats Not my little my cats been throwing up non-stop, out of attention.

Just puking all over the pointy house. Those are the best, dude. They are the best. I think, yeah, they are the best. My cat and the cat are going to come around, I think. Oh, are they beefing a little bit? Just, yeah, the cat kind of stares at them. The second he cries, the cat runs away.

He's freaked out. But I think eventually, as the kid gets older older the cat will eventually die and they'll be Really cats fuck they escape and then that's what it is. Yeah. Well, so yeah, it's been great. All right Well, first of all mark congratulations I don't want to say thank you guys for being so supportive and kind and very sweet just not only with like Logistical like work shit. Guys, thank you so much for watching Flagrant. I was being really sweet there, okay? But just logistically like work shit and then also just like the outpouring of love has

been very sweet. I genuinely am very grateful for every good love. We're very excited for you, we're very proud of you and it's going to be a very cool future that we're all living in with President Donald J. Trump. I mean with Madam Vice President Kamala. With whoever wins, the best person will yeah. Yes surely Yeah, yeah, educated populace will definitely make the best decision You can always trust the people to make a decision. You can always I mean isn't that democracy?

Yeah, I mean what did Socrates say? Oh, he said they're too stupid to vote Yeah, so maybe not what he said, but we believe in the America. We believe in George Washington whose mom was Albanian. Yeah, Catholic. Catholic. First president of the United States of America was a Catholic. Shout out.

Take that, you. Yeah. Can you say that word? Yeah, yeah. I think so. Soon. It checks out, right? Soon.

Flagrant, thank you guys so much for rocking with us. We appreciate y'all. We love y'all. Peace.