Andrew Schulz's Flagrant with Akaash Singh - We Got Too High For This Podcast

Episode Date: January 21, 2020

This week Andrew, Akaash, and Kaz discuss: the AFC & NFC finals, getting a male masseuse, getting high on the pod, the downside of having strangers charge your phone, Sherman vs Revis, OBJ slappin' some ass, the positives of Aaron Hernandez, and much more. INDULGE!!! Want an extra episode a week? Become a PATRON www.PATREON.com/FLAGRANT2

What's up everybody, welcome to Flavor 2, No Easy Buckets. We out here, Akash is going to smoke weed today. So we're going to do it right now. Banger, you know what I mean? Let's spark this up. Everybody who's at home listening. Matter of fact, if you're at home listening, you were going to spark something up and you were just letting it get, you know, letting it get a little toasty before.

Why don't you light it up with us? Make sure you got some food on the way too. We got some food on the way as well. For munchy purposes. Whoa! That shit lights up wonderfully. Now Akash has never smoked weed before. No.

Right now we have real live marijuana. Ash tray. Oh, I think we can use that blue shit. Yeah, that's usually a rolling tray,

but we can use that for ash as well. I don't know exactly. Anyway, guys, if Elon Musk can do it, if Elon Musk can do it, we can do it. Now,

in the meantime, I got to tell you guys something right before we get to Akash smoking, because that's going to be a historic moment. He smokes like a professional. Fuck it. I'm going to add a fourth show for the special. I wasn't

sure. It was the same thing as Town Hall where I was hesitant about adding another show and then, you know what? I hit up a guy who, it looks really cool. Hold on, wait for it. Don't do it yet what i hit up um you got to see this right here a guy who it looks really cool no hold on wait for it don't don't do it yet don't you so and i hit up uh i hit up rogan you know i try not to bug rogan a lot but when i really needed his advice for something i go to him and i ask his advice and here give me that just give me that because you're being

too distracting while i'm trying to do something fucking important. Sorry for the weeb. Okay. So, and I was like, should I do it? Should I add the fourth show? Because I want to do it and I want to film all four. And a lot of people were reaching out. They said they were flying in.

They couldn't get tickets this, that, the other. So we said, fuck it. We're going to add another show. It's going to be Sundayay so there'll be two shows sunday those tickets go on sale when do they go on sale thursday 10 a.m okay thursday 10 a.m dandrushulls.com you can get them there get them anywhere i appreciate y'all so much go get those motherfuckers sell that bitch out like you did the other three and let's make some magic man i'm excited to film this fucking special i really am um yeah thank y'all so much okay now let's get to the smoking weed thing oh gosh here you go this is akash's first pull have you ever inhaled anything

in your life i had one puff of a cigarette when my dad my dad used to smoke right and i think i thought it looked cool or something he was like like, I want you to do this. Yeah. And he told me how to do it. He said, make like a kissing motion and then inhale real deep. And I thought my fucking chest was going to cave in. Yo, you sure he was talking about smoking? So wait.

But you had asthma as a kid, right? Yeah, I still do. And your dad let you smoke a cigarette with asthma? Yeah. Okay. That's what's up. That's cool. That's great parenting, honestly.

I learned a lesson real quick. Take a hit of this shit right now. Go for it. Now, inhale. No, no, no. You didn't inhale. So you go like this. You pull. Don't waste all your breath. Okay? And then after you

pull, suck it down. Oh, I'm going gonna cough my dick off that's okay that's okay you got virgin lungs that's how marijuana works yeah there it is

now oh oh the big boy yeah big boy lungs oh gosh out here

don't spill on the fucking carpet how does it feel? Yo, I feel great. Now, if we're being honest to the listeners right now, this is CBD. No, it's got THC, though. It might have a little THC in it, but it's CBD. I need some CBD.

I pulled my whole fucking back out. Shouts to Radix, by the way. You know Radix is CBD, a flagrant soup. We don't play around. We're going to tell you more about them later. But guys, I have like a horrible back injury. I pulled my back. I can barely.

How'd that happen? Son, I don't know. Being 36. That's how it happened. 36 years old. How? That's how it happened. Bro, I pulled it a little bit.

My girl was putting me through a workout class in a hotel gym because she knows all these exercises in a row. Okay. And I realized I've only learned like four exercises in my life, which are dumbbell curls, tricep extensions, bench press, and then abs. Okay. You be squatting though? Oh, no, squats. I know how to squat too.

Okay. And I kind of know how to do the one where it's not a squat. You just bend over. Deadlift? You just bend over. Deadlifts? Deadlifts. Deadlifts. You just bend over. Deadlifts.

You know that one. I don't even know what that works, honestly. Whenever I'm doing that exercise, no muscle hurts. Everything on your back, your legs, your back, all that type of stuff. Really? That's how I fucked up my back is deadlifts. Deadlifting? I can't squat for shit.

My hips are mad tight, but I can actually deadlift more than you would think I would. And if your form is bad, that's how you fuck your back up. I mean, I don't know how to do any of this shit. It also looks like this smoke is going nowhere. And can you even see us at home at all? Yeah. You can see us? Absolutely.

So I get out of the plane. We're flying back to New Orleans. I cannot even walk. I can't even walk. It's that bad. Your girl had to push you through the tarmac and the fucking... Thank God, no. But my girl had to do this.

When the Uber arrived at her apartment, her apartment building has two big glass doors. One big glass door and another big glass door. She had to open both of the glass doors for me while taking all of our bags in. Oh, wow. And I had to look at her mail doorman for me while taking all of our bags in. Oh, wow. And I had to look at her male doorman. I was like, what a pussy.

Yo, 100%. Right. And I'm a superhero to the doorman because I was on Subway Creatures. And I just lost all the fucking... Dude, doorman, they love Subway Creatures. Really? No respect at all from her whatsoever from her doorman for the month that she's been in the building. I'm on Sub creatures once and then all of her like kind of like russian or like baltic doorman or like i saw you that was a big look though jay-z subway guy i know you um that's like

that's like a step below being on like humans of new york son i'm getting there i'm working my way up humans in new york is like a fucking that's a bucket list way more of my friends congratulated me on that than like selling out town hall like I had friends that didn't even come

to town hall but the second I'm on subway creatures they're hitting me up like bro you made it anyway so I can't even move and I want to come

do the podcast right so my girl orders me a masseuse to come over right what kind of masseuse? Male masseuse.

That's what's up. Okay. Wait for it. I'm not there to fuck around. I respect it. Six, four, violently gay. Violently gay. Violently gay.

Violently gay. Son, the guy rolled in. I think he had rollerblades. the guy rolled in with his fucking thing and everything like that right he goes hi guys um okay so who's gonna get the massage and i was like and he said me now oh fuck i said my girl's name doesn Doesn't matter. Whatever. Fine. That's her name. Bleep it. Anyway. So he's in there and my girl's going to do a workout class. Yeah. I did not want my girl to leave. You alone with this, man.

I'm alone. It's not that he's gay. It's that if he wanted to rape me, I couldn't defend myself. That has something to do with him being gay. But yeah, sure. Go ahead. Yeah. Well, yeah.

Well, yeah. Also that. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. yeah yeah there's my ego because it's like i'm already on my stomach like what are you saying you're not gonna want to like like the idea that the idea that you wouldn't be attracted at all son hey look a gay dude gonna look at naked me and not want to fuck that's what i'm saying my ego can't tolerate my ego cannot tolerate i had my bling on son i had my bling on right i had no shirt everything was going the guy's like you wear as many clothes as you want i'm like oh god and i looked at my girl and i was like i was like what time is your class and then she's like it's 2 30 and i was like oh okay so you're gonna hang for a little before i was doing everything I could so she would just

stay there and at least watch me get raped you know what I mean because there's nothing she could really do in that situation and

son she left me and it was just me and him and he goes and I was like just focus on that one part of my back this guy is pulling down

my fucking underwear a little bit oh dude he went all the way up my leg cut my whole butt cheeks and came down like he was really going for it working it he was really my fucking underwear a little bit. Hey, yo. Dude, he went all the way up my leg, cut my whole butt cheeks,

and came down. Like, he was really going for it. Working it. He was really working it. Did he look like glittery lotion? Say again? Did he use, like, glittery lotion? I don't know. I can't look at my body.

I can't look at my back. I can't even turn around. But there is a point where it's like, I understand that fear that women have, that constant fear that that shit could happen, because I could not defend myself from this guy. Oh, yeah. And he's got like an amazing grip.

Like if he really wanted to hold me down, he'd have to respect it. If he took two hands around your waist, it's a rap skit. And I thought about the whole way through. And that's why immediately I was like, hey, can you just put on the lotion first? Because I figured. I figured. Simply grip. Yes. And that's why immediately I was like, hey, can you just put on the lotion first? Because I figured I figured if I figured if it was lotioned up, I figured it was lotioned up. I could slide out and I don't wriggle around on the ground or something. I couldn't do that much movement, but I wriggle around on the ground or something. And then I could get away.

And I listen. I know anybody listen now. That's like that's an incredible ego. You're not going to get raped by your masseuse because he's part of like a masseuse company and he's not going to risk it all. He's not going to risk it all. Yo, Uber's be raping. You don't know what I look like.

Yeah. Uber's be raping. Son. That's a big ass company. I think you should have done this. You got to light that up again. Okay. Exactly.

If an Uber can rape, a Lyft can rape, a masseuse can rape. Yo. And I'm doing all the work for him. I took off my own clothes. I even said this. He was going down real deep with my legs. Yo, you really were asking for it. Son, I was asking for it. What were you wearing? Son, I was wearing white underwear. I guarantee you could see a dude who's staying through them.

They're very clear. They're very clear. Now, here's the thing. And this is what I thought when he took it to the next level, because I think he thought I was flirting a little bit. He was massaging my legs and he kept bumping into my socks. And I don't know why I said this, but it's the gayest thing I've ever said in my life. I go, you can take the socks off. Son, you don't have another man pull your socks off as a grown-up? As a kid?

Okay, maybe. But as a grown-up? Nah, never. Son, that was the gayest part of the whole massage. Now, this is key. This is key on how gay it could have been. Okay, maybe. But as a grown-up? Nah, never. Son, that was the gayest part of the whole massage. Now, this is key. This is key on how gay it could have been. Okay, go. Did he roll the socks off, or did he pull from the toe?

Son, he took them off with his mouth. That's the shit that I thought was mad weird. Like a retriever, bro. If he rolled them off, he could have rolled them off very elegantly, like a stocking. If he pulled it off by the toe, that's not good. But if he rolled it off like a stocking, very seductively. He started at my calf and rolled it off. Wow.

For sure, dude. You were kind of asking for it. I was asking for it. You were flirting real tough. I was flirting, son. I couldn't. And dude, the problem is when your head's in that donut, you can't see anything.

So all you can do is think. And I was trying to think how I would protect myself. You know what I know what i mean like what i would throw at him how i would you know that's it just take it son not only not only is he more powerful not only is his grip more strong not only can i not defend myself i'm lubed up yeah he's rubbing the lotion behind my butt already you looking wet son i'm looking wet yo and i I'm looking wet. Yo. And I'm making sounds. It's turning him on. I'm like, uh. Because every time it gets to the bottom of my...

I was moaning. You were moaning. I wasn't sure. Son, I was moaning. Dead ass moaning. You can't help a moan, though. You sit in all your soft spots. He knows how your body works.

He literally was like... He would say this to me. He would literally go, do you want it harder? And you said, yeah. Yeah. I'm trying to get this knot out so I can come to flagrant and I can do what I do.

That's how much Andrew loves the podcast, yo. He got to fucking sacrifice it, bro. I'm out here sacrificing. It's crazy that this happened Thursday before we left New Orleans. I went to Aare or Aire Ancient Baths. It's over here in like Soho someplace. Yeah, I heard about this. This is a big thing. Yeah. Popping. So relaxing. It's over here in like Soho, someplace around there. Yeah, I heard about this. This is a big thing.

Yeah. Popping. So relaxing. It's beautiful. You go to all these different like water situations and then you get a massage at the end. Yeah. I fell asleep during the massage.

My masseuse was also a guy too. Right. That's dangerous, B. I could have been sexually assaulted and I have no idea. I might be a victim. Son. Can I tell y'all a story? Like I might be a victim and be a victim. Son. Can I tell y'all a story? Like I might be a victim and I just don't know.

Can I tell y'all a story? And I wanted to do a bit about this, but I don't know if it'll come out. So fuck it. But F.A. sent me this story, right? There's this Asian dude in like Manchester, England that raped like 200 men. Right? Little Asian guy. That's what's up.

Oh, I thought it was like, isn't that that big hairy guy that was in the newspaper? Little Asian guy. Wow. Indonesian. Oh, I did see this. was like, isn't that that big hairy guy that was in the newspaper? Little Asian guy. Wow. Indonesian. Oh, I did see this. Rape 200 men. I'll break down the whole story for you. Okay?

This is what he would do. He'd find them drunk going home, right? After the bar. You want to pass it that way? Yeah. Okay. I'm going to throw it. No.

Okay. I can't. I can't. I'll sash it out. There you go. Okay. So, 200 men, right? Eden, listen up, because it could be you.

Indonesia, okay? 200 men. Don't put the picture. It's fine. Okay. He's in Manchester. What he would do is wait for guys to be drunk. I was telling Akash about this.

Wait for guys to be drunk walking home. Okay? They'd be wasted, and he'd be like, hey, be like hey man you look shit face do you want to just like charge your phone at my crib and then just kind of hang out and the guys would be like oh my god you're so nice right he drug him when they got to the crib they'd pass out he'd rape him right this is crazy rape him right they wake up in the morning don don't know anything, right? I'm going to take your phone away. I'm not on my phone. I'm going to take your watch away.

You found a way. Tell the story. You found a way to, it is unbelievable. Tell the fucking story. How much you can ruin rhythm. It is like a gift. How am I ruining rhythm?

It is a true gift that you have to ruin rhythm. I have not said shit. Like, holy shit. I'm literally clicking these things off and paying attention to you. He looks so much like a young Larry David to me right now it's mind boggling

it's unbelievable it's mind boggling I'm trying to bring you in there's no weed in that thing I'm super fine so listen Jasmine take the fucking watch away

it was a thoughtful gift she knows I'm taping is there weed in this shit cause I'm low key feeling a little bit Jasmine take the fucking watch away please it was it was a thoughtful gift it was the worst gift for the podcast son is there weed in this shit cause I'm low key feeling a little bit anyway

back to the guy raping guys okay they go home they go he rapes him they wake up in the morning phone is fully charged

gives him like some tea they go on with their day they think they met the nicest guy right and obviously we're joking around Like that's Asian privilege

Like you can rape and nobody knows Etc blah blah blah Little jokes Okay Now Years go by of him raping guys Years One guy wakes up during it

That poor fucking guy Poor fucking guy Now Tells the police They bring the guy in. They look at his phone. He's acting weird with his phone. And they end up looking through his phone.

They find 200 guys that they've raped. Now, maybe in a second. Now, he has to, the police have to make a decision. Okay. And the decision they make is to call all the guys that he's fucked. Do not call and tell them. Do not call any of them. Boy, this was a victimless crime until you told me, son.

Oh my God. Think about it. Not only was it a victimless crime, right? Think about this. You think this guy is the ideal immigrant. You're like, open the borders. Bring more Indonesians in

because not only did this guy take me in when I was drunk, he charged my fucking phone. There is no way. You woke up the next day fully hydrated, phone full battery. Your ass doesn't hurt because he's Asian. Nothing bad happened to you. And statistically speaking, at least half of those people enjoyed it. At least half.

First of all, 50% of people are not gay. I don't know where your stats are. Where are you, Atlanta? This guy dressed in fucking magenta talking about half of people are gay. I'm saying a good percentage of the people was like,

oh, you know what? Some of those guys might have been gay. Was that what that was? Okay. Some of those guys were upset they slept through it. Now, right?

Bro, you could've woke me up I would've I would've been into it I would've thrown it back Now Think about it You received that call Are you pissed

Yes Why the fuck Would you tell me 1000% Isn't that the worst Like what you first do If you're the cop Just test to see

If he has HIV If he doesn't have Fucking AIDS That's what you do You just shut he has HIV. If he doesn't have fucking AIDS. That's what you do. You just shut the fuck up. Also, if he doesn't have AIDS, that's a miracle. I mean, I got buttfucked 200 people. Yeah, but can you go? Does it reverse up you?

I'm sure both. It's not only bottoms getting AIDS. Yeah, they are. Only bottoms get AIDS. How do you get AIDS? It travels up your dick? It's an exchange of fluids. How good is this AIDS? I mean, it's not AIDS. How do you get AIDS? It travels up your dick? It's an exchange of fluids. How good is this AIDS? I mean, it's not AIDS. It's not without an S. Speaking of someone

who dresses like they have AIDS. How the fuck do I dress like I have AIDS, bro? Because you look gay, Sam. I'm not saying you look like you got AIDS. Because I got great brown skin and lavender pops off. All I gotta say is that outfit is low in T-cells. Pretend like this shit don't pop off the screen, Alex.

It does. It's looking beautiful. It is looking beautiful. It's like magic, like in a Magic Johnson movie. It looks like magic. That shit is magical, bro. He didn't wear a lot of purple most of his career. I am positive your girl got you that outfit.

Tight ass leggings. Son, your immune system got nothing on that. Bro, it takes a lot of confidence to pull a tight lavender. And y'all just jealous. That's all the fun. You're right. We jealous. Jealous of this.

I got to sling these tight pants. Anyway, back to this guy. You find out that he doesn't have HIV, right? It's done. Nah, I want that call, son. You want to know? Nah, bro. Talk to me about why you want to know.

I could be pregnant. I know you're Puerto Rican. And it seems possible. But there's no fucking way Nah I want the call Because if he did give me a STD And then I take that to my girl And now we just ruin my relationship

What I'm saying is this Cause she's gonna believe She's gonna think that you cheated And you did You just didn't do it willingly Yeah Right We're raped

It's not cheating Yo But that's what I'm saying This is a better question Would you rather Okay Akash would you let's say you get raped

by this Indonesian guy yeah right he got an STD okay would you rather tell your girl that you cheated

with another girl and she gave you an STD or that this guy fucked you and you got an STD oh shit that's a good question I fucked every bitch

this side of the Mississippi that's what just happened I'm fucking all the women Can't your girl forgive you cheating With a girl But with a dude She ain't gonna look at you the same ever yo That's different bro

You let that happen to you How you gonna tell your girl what to do And you got fucked in the ass And there's video By a small Asian man. There's video. Like the cops have seen it. Oh my God.

So wait, so did he like record all this? Every single guy, he recorded. Pound Town. Oh, that's a sick one. That guy was fucking pounding them out. Dude, serious. I don't know about Pound Town for him. It was probably more like Pound Village. Pound Neighborhood. For real. It's a Pound Village. serious I don't know about pound town for him it's probably more like pound village town neighborhood for real

it's a it's a pound village that's him bro oh my god he looks like Edwin son you can't trust that motherfucker that guy inviting you

up to his hotel with bleach blonde hair that's Andrews Masseuse sons nah bro this nasty motherfucker look at the pictures he's taking

looks like he just maybe he just thought it was a good date for him. I mean, he's clearly gay, yo. Yes. So his argument was he never drugged the guys. That he asked them to participate in his fetish, which was be passed out. Pretend to be passed out while he fucks them. It's a good defense.

Pretty good defense. You just contact one of the people and then they're going to be like, what he fucks them it's a good defense pretty good defense great defense but you just contact one of the people and then they're gonna be like what the fuck are you talking about yeah it's over yo what if all the guys were actually closeted and they didn't want people to know that they were willingly getting butt fucks they're like no no he doesn't write me what do you mean i charge your phone phone. What are you talking about? I didn't rape people. What kind of nonsense is this?

Like, who would you really believe? You believe that little Indonesian man is capable of rape of 200 men? Or there's 200 dudes that want to try it out? And he is the trial. Like, if you're going to try getting butt fucked. That's the guy. It would be a little Indonesian man. It's like the first time first time you go bowling use the little things on the bumpers the bumpers that's a that's a bumper dick that's a gay bumper dick gay bumper dick gay bumper dick

sounds like larry david's friend but no i mean spit all over you some of my back hurts I was like oh it's on the shirt still it's fucking me up yo damn son

my bad it's the same size as that penguin guys listen Antonio Brown is still out there acting crazy

I don't know why y'all going so nuts about this shit man Antonio yo you know how crazy Antonio Brown is still out there acting crazy. I don't know why y'all are going so nuts about this shit, man. You know how crazy Antonio Brown is? Antonio Brown, I literally have watched the video of Antonio Brown, right? Yeah. That you guys just showed me.

And the first thing that came to my head was, this is the worst person to ever catch a football. And I just watched the Aaron Hernandez. Like I'm watching AB and I'm like, there's nothing redeemable about this guy. Like nobody likes, at least Hernandez's wife, roll with him. Man, listen, if you ask Robert Kraft or Bill Belichick Aaron Hernandez Sparkling professional Sparkling Cables on time

Film room They were shocked To hear this shit This AB shit We saw it coming Kinda seen it coming Like a fucking train bro Like

You didn't see the Aaron Hernandez shit The full shit Nah I haven't seen it man I fell asleep on it I fell asleep twice Yeah But I'm telling you

The Aaron Hernandez thing? Yeah. I saw it. That shit is crazy. It's unbelievable. It's fucking good. I honestly think it's good. My whole thing is there were some people who didn't need to be in that shit.

Like who? Like the fat white gay dude. Like the other gay offensive lineman or whatever. Yeah. The whole time I'm watching, I'm thinking, okay, he's going to get to the part where they hooked up. They hooked up. They weren't even on the same team. They just had. Yeah. The whole time I'm watching, I'm thinking, okay, like he's going to get to the part where like, where they hooked up, right? They hooked up as patrons.

They weren't even on the same team at the same fucking time, No, gay people want to fuck all the time. Why y'all think that? Exactly. So why? That's why I'm telling that.

That's why we think that. Yo, not all gay people just want to have sex all the time. They just want to oil you up. It's not like a masseuse is going to come over like,

just because they're gay they want to fuck you. Like, what are y'all even thinking, bro? They were doing their job. Gay people can do their job without having sex with people. Y'all are nuts.

Y'all so prejudiced, son. Sounds like Andrew got fucked. I don't know what y'all talking about. Cass is dressed as Ursula. She's supposed to look like Ursula from The Little Mermaid. Give that bitch a voice back. Give her a voice back, son. This is look like Ursula from The Little Mermaid. Yo, give that bitch a voice back. Give her a voice back, bud.

This is why I wore this, to balance it out. What's that? My snowman tee. Just so I couldn't look that much of a pussy. So I had to make sure I got my Jeezy. Oh. Damn, you don't remember these shirts? What, a snowman?

I have a different idea of snowman. Alex, you remember the snowman. Yo, how tight that shirt is don't make you look no less gay. It looks like a guy busted on your chest. Three puddles have come. He's about to zip that shit right back up. Right the fuck back up. God damn.

Look at the littlest puddle upset. I did not think that through. How upset the little puddle is. At all. That's the Indonesian sperm? That little puddle is. At all. That's the Indonesian sperm? That little puddle's like, I wish I was in an ass right now. Just swimming around like, God damn it. All my other friends ended up in assholes.

Yo, how disappointed do you think gay sperm is when it comes out? And it's just like, asshole, I can't do my job, man. Fuck. Yo, do you think they bust on each other? Of course. They come inside each other, I bet. You might as well just come inside. Why would you bust on?

We only bust on. We've made an art of busting on because we have to. It's necessary. It's part of the game. But if a girl doesn't get pregnant, you just leave it all inside. You let her rip. Nah, sometimes I like busting on. Yeah, but that's because you

had so many abortions you're not gonna do it if you don't it's like it's almost like ptsd like once you feel that like i'm about to come thing you just hear google gaga like in your head oh my god how do they how do puerto rican kids go but no no you know what i'm saying like i feel like we've made an art out of it because we had to pull out is that fair to say preventative measure preventative measure that's what i'm trying to say you sleep better at night when you pull out and you see it out there oh you don't have to wait the two weeks and think maybe for sure it's great 100 it's like when you shoot something in the air and like you see the bullet. If you never see that bullet drop, you're like, fuck that bullet go, bro.

God damn. It's like Bobby Shmurda's hat. Like, I should just throw it off. One of the greatest mysteries in hip hop. It's like, who killed Tupac? Where did Bobby Shmurda's hat come from? I'm all fucking just floated into the atmosphere and never to be fucking seen again. God damn.

Akash, you feeling high? I think I do. Do you really? No, you don't. Nah, a little bit. Maybe a little. I feel a little different. Not quite high, though.

Did we get enough of the food? Is that our munchies? We had to order some munchies. Yeah. The best type of munchies you could possibly order. Chigga-dee-dee. Chigga-dee-dee. All right, yo.

So what's going on, man? What's been happening this week? We were in New Orleans. Oh, yeah. Have y'all ever been to New Orleans? Yes. Yes. You have.

I love New Orleans. I went to the Mardi Gras right after Katrina. Oh, really? And it was dope, dude. The whole city, they had like a sense of humor about it. It was weird. Like all the floats and stuff. These are the best people.

It's the greatest city, man. I might take my girl for Valentine's. I would thoroughly recommend it. Alex and I went down there. Alex and Mark as well. Alex's initial reaction. Al, what was it? Initial reaction.

Well, I thought it was all bullshit, just commercial. And then I fell in love. That might be my favorite. What did you like about it? It just won all the different types of people. And then the energy people have. It's like no one's taking themselves too serious. It's a great vibe.

Yeah, let's just have fun. Let's just chill. It's a fantastic big event city. Yeah. Like if the Super Bowl or All-Star Weekend or anything's in New Orleans, it's the fucking best. Because everything's right there. You can drink wherever you want. The food is fantastic.

The bomb is fucked up. The food is whoof. And the people there are just so fucking dope. I had to put on like five. I love it oh yeah I mean the food after going to New Orleans

I understand why Zion Williamson sleeps every night and it's not even a question we would nap I would be asleep by 1 I mean the food is just like so dense

with butter and everything but as far as a city and this is why I think it'd be great to go to it is one of the most unique cultural

experiences in the world not just america we just happen to have it in america yeah and it is so foreign like when you're in new orleans it's a different you do not feel like you're in america and i think i said this to you i wasn't sure i said to you but like it's the only place in america outside of like where I've gone, can we drink the water? Yeah. Like I had a real, because it feels so foreign. Yeah.

You feel like you're in a completely different world. Were you like in a heavily Cajun part? Not necessarily Cajun per se, but we were by the quarter. Okay. So like, and when you're in, I mean, interesting thing about the French Quarter, all the buildings and everything in the French Quarter were actually built in like the Spanish time. The French were there, then the Spanish were there. I mean, you have Creole people coming down.

There was, I mean, this was one of the only places in the whole United States where at one point in time, there were white people living there. There were what they call mulatto people there. They were like the mixed black and white people living there. Free mulatto people. There were free blacks and slaves.

Yeah. All at the same time living there together. And they invited a bunch of Haitians because the French people that live there wanted to increase the French speaking population. So during slavery, they invite free blacks to live in new Orleansleans and all kind of like mixed together and i mean it's just like this amazing fucking place and um well they had when they had the world's fair there right they had the world's fair there in like in the 80s and that's what really like

shot blew it up you know oh no you go to a funeral it's been like an amazing city it was the third most populated city in the world and in america back in the day. Like, it was a big hub. This is where all the goods and shit come in for middle America. Like, all the container ships go right up through the Mississippi, New Orleans. Yeah. But it was a fun fucking town.

The food was unreal, man. I want it, yo. It's the best fucking food. That's a problem. Yeah. That's a problem. How much you gain? I think I put on like five.

Five pounds. Yeah. Minimum. Probably even more. I I think I put on like five. Five pounds. Minimum. I had the best crawfish at a fucking gas station. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. The whole thing. What was it? The gumbo at Dookie Chase. Oh, God.

I just pulled my back again. You're going to hear that a lot during the podcast. So we went to a place named Dookie Chase. And this is like one of these old traditional southern restaurants that kind of feels like it's in a house a bit you know and um it's like obama went there oh by the way alex thinks he's slick so every city we go to alex gotta do dropping in now he's the showrunner for dropping in so that means he got to organize what we check out this out there and he's been kind of killing it with restaurants right and this last time i realized every time I walk into a restaurant,

I see a picture of Obama. And I'm like, hold on. Are you just Googling where Obama ate in every city? And he just kind of like smiles at me. I'm like, you lazy motherfucker. Here I am thinking scouring TripAdvisor. In fact, all these food blogs. He's just going to Barack's Instagram, typing in fucking New Orleans.

It's always the best food, though. He has great taste for food. I'm not going to lie. Our first black president does have the best taste for food. George Bush out there eating at fucking Arby's. You know what I mean? Trying to be warm to people. Trump is giving motherfuckers McDonald's.

He went straight fast food. Barack went to a place that's first name was Dookie. Yeah. And the next name Chase. Oh, man. And it was unbelievable. Best gumbo I've ever had in my entire life. Best fried chicken I've ever had in my life.

Son, fried chicken was crazy. By far. By far. Best fried chicken I've ever had. And that's crazy. Unreal. You get one of those fucking frozen alcoholic drinks with the wing spots. First of all, we got to discuss this

about the drinks we're we're trying to drink we joke around during the show about it but like every drink there is devastated like there's a place called pat o'brien's and their drink that they're known for is called the hurricane i know the hurricane that's like the drink right some motherfuckers drink that after kat. Everybody's just getting a hurricane. They never changed it. And here's the thing. The place is not a Caribbean restaurant or a Caribbean bar. It's an Irish bar. There's no hurricanes in Ireland.

There's no fruit in Ireland. It's a fruity beverage called Hurricane at a place called Pat O'Brien's. They could have easily switched the drink, right? But they're like, no, no we're gonna fucking lock this down it's the big easy man they don't care does anything affect these people it didn't look like

I didn't see anybody fighting nothing I'm telling you when I was seeing Mardi Gras floats like making light of like it was like here's a female aid truck or whatever and they'd be like taking shit from people or whatever it was just like Mardi Grasy goes i mean katrina was four months ago and they're like no we're just here we're gonna this is what we do we make light of it and another dope thing is like the age range what do you mean about that apparently a new

orleans funeral like a fucking parade you're supposed to like follow it around they're playing music so it's like an Indian wedding Yes Yes Wow No wildlife But it's the first part Yeah it's a barrage They don't call them funerals They're home going ceremonies So they're basically celebrating That you're going home to God

So it's not sad at all How fucking beautiful is that They play music They party That's how it should be Like it's fucking dope It's really dope Oh really

It's dope What were you saying about the age range Oh The biggest age range of people Like hanging out and drinking together. Yes. You have college students, fresh in college. What was those things?

Formals? Yeah. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. So what these schools do, they'll schedule their formal at a place like New Orleans where it's fun and cool. And then these kids just go drink, get fucked up, and then they have one night where they put on a nice little gown and go to their little dance that's paid for by the school. And then you have senior citizens all in the same place,

drinking together, hanging like that. I've never seen that anywhere. Usually it's an old city, young city. I mean, where's the one place you've seen it? Where, Vegas maybe? Burning Man. Oh, Burning Man. Oh, yeah.

It is a vibe that everybody gets in on and they commit to. And I was trying to think about while I was there, I was like, why do we love this place? What is it we love about this place? And I'll tell you what it is. It is our idea of freedom executed. We talk about freedom in New York and we're like, hey, man, we want to be free and freedom is so important. And then we're like, yeah,

but you can't play your music after 10 o'clock because the condo board doesn't like that. Hey, Hey, freedom is so we got to do whatever we want to do. Hey, don't park on the street on Tuesday and Wednesday. You're going to get, Hey freedom. We're all about freedom. You know, you've got to do free parks, close at 1am. Please get out of the park. So it's like there's this illusion of freedom you go to New Orleans you will see people

selling beers on the street like they sell waters outside of a Yankee game you will see there's open container for the whole city

right people smoking inside there's literally freedom and there's a cost to freedom it's wild motherfuckers are drunk motherfuckers do some crazy shit

you get to see a lot of wild shit out there. I'm not saying you don't. You take one wrong turn in New Orleans. And it gets crazy. And you are in a bad place. It gets crazy. But the benefit of it is when you're there, you feel this true freedom. Not once when I was there was I like, yo, can we do this?

Well, we get arrested. You know that kind of shit where you're looking over your shoulder constantly? Not once. And it's a beautiful feeling. And I really think everybody listening right now, if you get the opportunity, go to fucking New Orleans, man. God bless. Love that city. I've always said it's my second.

That and Houston and Toronto. It's a great city. My favorite city is like North America. Just so fun. So cultural. Yeah. Just people are chilling. Great food. Toronto doesn't have great food, but Houston and New Orleans have fantastic food. Yeah. Just people chilling, great food.

Toronto doesn't have great food, but Houston and New Orleans have fantastic food. Yeah, man. Love it there. It was good. Anytime I get a chance to go to New Orleans, I go. All right, let's take a break for a second. Guys, simple as this. Sometimes you have to wear button-down shirts, okay?

I'm sure you're familiar with the company, Untuck It. They basically make a button-down shirt that's not supposed to be tucked in so it doesn't look like you're wearing your father's clothing. Every time I have a regular button-down shirt and I don't tuck it into my pants, it looks stupid. They literally create the shirt so you don't have to tuck it into a pants. I don't care if you're listening right now, you're like, I don't wear button down shirts. You're going to have to, sometimes you're going to have to go out to dinner with your girl's

parents. Okay. You're going to have to have a, uh, maybe a more casual type of job interview. You're going to have to do something shit. You might go out for an apartment and they want to meet you before they accept you. You're going to need a button down shirt. Maybe you don't want to go tucked into the pants. Maybe you gained a little weight. Maybe you did something that you don't feel super comfortable with that tucked in situation. Maybe you don't like your belts. Okay. Who knows what it is? Point is, get yourself a shirt. You get 20% off. Use the offer code flagrant. Okay. Go to untuckit.com. U-N-T-U-C-K-I-T dot com. That's it. You get your shirt.

Simple as that. You have something in the closet. You know at any point in time you are ready to go. All right. That's what I recommend to you. Go to untuckit.com. You're going to love the way they fit. Also, give us tons of feedback on it. Tell us the ones that you like.

Tell us the ones that you would recommend to the other asshole army members because we want to know. We want to make sure you guys are getting the best of the best. So let's get back to the show. Untucket.com. Use that promo code FLAGRANT. Peace. You got a Super Bowl? Akash, hi, bro.

Is he high? Are you high, Akash? I think Akash is high, dog. Is he high? Are you high, Akash? I think Akash's high, dog. Look at his eyes. They're hungry. I think we're getting some echo from that door being open. Yeah, close the door and bring Akash some food. I'm hungry. Do you think you're high, though, for real?

I don't think so, but I don't feel completely high. It'll work you up an appetite, but you shouldn you shouldn't feel like lightheaded or anything like that. No, no, no, no, no. Yeah. Pass that sushi to Akash. Let him make sure he's straight. Hold on one second. Not yet, not yet, not yet.

Okay, so Akash, now that you're high, maybe we can get your feelings on a couple things here. How are you excited about the Super Bowl? Not particularly. Yo, he's high, son. How you got high from no THC, son? I don't know. Yo, I got really high, son.

Yo, look at him. He's like a step slow. Hold on, son. Oh my God. Hold on. It was hard for him to make eye contact with me. He looked like me looking at my game of Seuss. He went like this.

Those eyes are getting low a little bit yeah so do you feel a little paranoia right now no do you feel like at any point in time we could lock the door and just all rape you together at one time like i've been thinking about that since i got to this podcast since i met cas that was funny edin said i'll charge your phone Since I met Kaz, it's been my fantasy. Akash, if I wanted it, I could have it. That was funny. Edwin said, I'll charge your phone. Edwin, what a banger. Okay, Edwin.

Okay, so Akash, since you're high, I want to go and just direct this all to you and try to make this as uncomfortable and awkward as possible. Can you take your hands out of your pockets? He's really high. You still got the weed out uh yeah i'll give you that week because we're gonna keep getting it okay so so uh like they're not like the new one say what like the new one we still got a lot to go around oh no you're not ready for that. So, Akash, we have a Super Bowl, right? Yeah. The word Super Bowl, how do you feel about that?

It's fine. Say Super. Super. Say Super. Super. Super. Super. Super.

Super Bowl. Super Bowl. Super Bowl. Super Bowl. Super Bowl. Super Bowl. Super Bowl. Bowl.

Bowl. Bowl. Bowl. Bowl. Bowl. Bowl. Bowl. Bowl. Bowl. Bowl. Bowl. Bowl. Bowl. Bowl. Bowl. Bowl. Bowl. Bowl. Bowl. Bowl. Bowl. Oh, this is going to be the best episode ever. Now, who do you think is going to win the Super Bowl? The Chiefs.

The Chiefs. Yeah. Okay. Now, why do you think the Chiefs are going to win the Super Bowl? Would you like to smoke a peace pipe while we talk about that? Go for it. There we go. There you go.

Hit that again. Don't be afraid to ask. Smoke, son. Make sure I hit the baby. You are cautious. No, no, no, no. You didn't. No, you didn't.

No, you didn't. Say Super Bowl again. Super Bowl. Give it one more. Really inhale it. Oh, you came out the nostrils, you little fucking dragon. You fucking dragon, you. Yeah, Akash.

You know what I mean? One time. One time. Okay. So, what? What? I got you. So, what? What? I got you. I got you.

What? You don't like the flavor? It should taste bad at the end. It does. That's the real weed. That's the real weed. Now, Super Bowl. Super Bowl.

Super Bowl. Super Bowl. Super Bowl. So, tell us what you think. What is your prediction? I think the Chiefs are going to win. I haven't believed in the Niners this whole time, so I think the Chiefs are going to win. You haven't believed in the Niners the whole time? No. Why is thats are going to win. You haven't believed in the Niners the whole time?

No. Why is that? You don't believe in the Niners or you don't believe in Garoppolo? I don't believe in Garoppolo. The defense might be the best defense I've ever seen. And maybe they'll be like the Ravens when they beat the Giants, but I don't. I just don't believe. And I think the Chiefs are actually good.

The Chiefs are phenomenal. Whoever the Ravens beat, I think the Ravens beat the Giants that year. They stopped Henry yesterday. But they still put up, what, 24 points? That was all like first quarter, first half. The Chiefs can't stop anybody. I think the Ravens beat the Giants that year. They stopped Henry yesterday. What's his name? Chris Davis. But they still put up, what, 24 points? That was all, like, first quarter, first half. They were up 17-7.

I got to give Andy Reed credit for his second half play. The second half play has been amazing. Like, adjustments. Yeah, Mahomes figures it out. It's his second year. Well, it's not only Mahomes, right? I think it's his – Both, probably.

Yeah. Well, Mahomes had the play that, like, changed the whole game. That scramble touchdown. That was unreal. That was some Mike Vick shit where I was like, well, there's the game. The Chiefs have like, they're the best momentum team in football. Once they got it going. Because you feel like you have to score every time.

Because they're going to score. And that's the only reason why the Patriots won last year. Because they didn't get the ball back in half time. It's like the Warriors. It's like the Warriors. Kind of. They are the Warriors of football. There you go.

Why don't you hit that one more time, you little warrior, you? You little splash brother. Yeah, you're a little splash brother, aren't you? You know what I mean? Get that. But really hit that shit. Come on, son. Come on, son. You got to stop that. Take one mean? Get that. But really hit that shit. Come on, son. Come on, son.

You got to stop that. Akash, stop that. What am I doing? Put some hair in your pussy. Andrew, if you really wanted to fuck with him, all you had to do was be like, didn't know you liked the wet though. Oh. I don't know what that means. I don't know.

You all remember training day? Oh, yes. Didn't know you liked the wet though. Is that when they fucked with you? Sure. PCP, dog. PCP. PCP. Primo. P-dog. That's what you had.

You didn't hit it. I think the light's out. Light that one up. Light up the new one, Cass. Okay, so you think that it's going to go down. You think that 49ers have an incredible run defense, but I don't know about their pass defense. Because didn't New Orleans put like 40 on them?

Yeah. Did you see the beef going on with Sherman and Revis? Did you see that? I did see that. No, I did not. I saw the aftermath of it. Why do corners hate Richard Sherman? Is there any corner?

I have not seen one elite corner. Because people don't think he's a shutdown corner. He's a great zone corner. The reason why Revis is so great is you put him on one side of the field and he shuts down the whole field okay now here's the thing these elite corners like rivas i think patrick patterson last year maybe a couple years ago they all come at richard sherman yeah is there something that they know about richard sherman that we don't know well what they said and i think uh what uh dominique foxworth said today on first take he was like they play a lot they put them in a lot of cover three cover two cover no cover

three cover two and cover three which basically you're just guarding two routes yeah you're making sure nobody goes over the top and you're making sure nobody uh cuts in front of you so since there's less to predict yes it's way easier to and if you're in a good scheme it'll look great and i guess like the people who say that he's a scheme cornerback, it's hard to say now because it's not like the Legion of Boom. The Legion of Boom, that was the easy

defense. You got Cam Chancellor. You got Bobby Wagner. You got all these all-time greats. Earl Thomas. These guys were hard hat motherfuckers. Oh, shit. So here's the thing. While I want to side Earl Thomas. You know what I'm saying? These guys were hard hat motherfuckers. Oh, shit. Stop it. So here's the thing.

While I want to side with and agree with these corners, I understand there's some competitiveness that goes along with any sport. Of course. And that competitiveness is only heightened when someone who plays your position is getting more accolades and more respect than you think they deserve based on their skill. That's when everybody was shitting on. Remember David Beckham? Yes.

David Beckham was a great player. He was just more famous than he was great. Yes. And you even saw it with Dane Cook, to be honest, as a stand-up comic. Yeah. He was more famous than he was great. He had the movies. He was dating the fucking

Spice Girl boom he was fucking you're talking about David Beckham David I mean what's his name Dane Cook

Dane Cook so comics didn't like it right but it was because they were like hey this isn't they felt it wasn't justified based on the skill level and I feel like

that's what happened to Richard Sherman a little bit right now which is you have these corners kind of hating on him and these maybe defensive you know specialists hating on him uh because he's more famous than they believe he's good but here's the bottom line where he goes he wins yeah right yeah and he bet on himself with his contract and they won and he won But like

Has he ever gone to a situation Where he wasn't Winning Winning or successful He's been in Seattle And he's been in the 49ers He had that game That sent him to the Super Bowl

When they lost to the Patriots The second time wasn't it? I'm sorry Y'all sorry ass quarterback You can't ever play me Ever test a sorry wide receiver With me Yeah

I've been trying to With a sorry receiver Like Crabtree Yeah but I mean you know what? The only whack thing that Revis did was bring it up right as he's going to the Super Bowl. That's right, bro. You could have said that any fucking time. What did Revis say?

I mean, he was just basically talking about how he's not really a true shut down. Oh, you got it? Edding, can you show it to us? Run that, Edding. Fear of getting, quote, fear of getting beat in man-to-man coverage every snap, every play. The fact that he doesn't travel as a cornerback is lame. Accept the challenge.

He should have said it. Yeah, and he got him on that as well. Accept the challenge as the best and shut Adams down the entire game. Do it for the game of football. Stop hiding yourself in the cover three zone. But here's my question, Revis. If their team is winning, shouldn't he do that? Shouldn't you keep doing the thing that is helping your team win?

Yes, they have the best defense I've seen since the Legion of Boom. He was on both. He was on both. And, yeah, why would you fuck with that? Why are you challenging him to do a worse job at defense? It makes no sense. Like, get out of that cover three and go do man-on-man. We're winning.

We're in the Super Bowl. You're sitting at home like a bum. You're on the Jets. They never did shit. Well, he did win the chip with the Patriots. Yeah, he got one. He got one with the Patriots. Wait a minute, Rivas did?

Rivas got one with the Patriots, yeah. Matter of fact, I think he beat the Seahawks. I think it was the year they beat the Seahawks. Was he on that team? I think so. Ooh, that... Now it's getting a little spicy. That is spicy.

Yo, my bad. I got to take that back because I remember when Revis was donezo, or at least we thought he was donezo. Then he signed with somebody for big money. I don't think it was... Tampa Bay. Tampa Bay.

Got cut, got picked up by the Patriots for I think a two-year contract and the second year had a bunch of money and they just cut him after one year and he won the super bowl and i remember i think i remember because you tweeted about how something like um they was like him and belichick hugging it was like well you're gonna get cut next year so whatever something like that i don't remember what the tweet was but well i don't know if he was cut i know he was doing like he was he was on some like mercenary shit for a couple years where he would just sign these big money shorts.

He's a fucking samurai. Yeah. Yo, first trip to the Super Bowl, Patriots facing Seattle Seahawks. Yeah. And won 28-24. When they should have handed it off to Marshawn. Holy shit. I forgot he was on that team.

All right. So then he could talk a little more shit than I thought. My bad. I take it back. I thought he was just one of these like sad losers. No. I mean, yo, when it comes to shutdown. No, I remember that motherfucker.

When it comes to shutdown quarterbacks, like, outside of Deion Sanders, you really can't... I told you when I saw him, right? I told you that story. I saw him. Well, you think it might have been him. No, I know it was him.

But I saw him. He was pulling up into this parking lot, and he was wearing a Jets 24 T-shirt. And that was the number, 24. And I know it was him, but I didn't want to ask him if it was him. And he was wearing his own jersey? Because I think he just came from practice. but I didn't want to ask him if it was him. And he was wearing his own jersey? Because I think he just came from practice.

But I didn't want to ask him if it was him because I didn't want some black guy to be like wait just because I'm wearing the fucking Rivas jersey you think I'm Darrell Rivas? Like the chances were just too slim.

Honestly if I was a professional athlete I'd do that more often because he probably wouldn't bother you. Like I would do that all the time. That's great. Because I'm fucking it's really like you know You don't want to body bother

You just wear your own shit Wear your own merch Yeah if you're dripped in Balenciaga Or something like that There's no way in hell They're gonna come Actually they're gonna come right up to you Of course

Even if they don't know who you are They'll be like Why you look like somebody important Yeah Like if you're If I'm LeBron James Then I'll just go wear A LeBron James jersey

That's why those people In Golden State Were so fucking stupid When Clay was walking around, you know, fake Clay, was walking around in his own jersey in the parking lot

and they were like, it's him. It's like, why would he walk around in his own jersey in the parking lot? And he didn't even like look like Thompson at all.

Nah, he looked enough. He looked like, he looked like, like how I look like James Harden. That's how he looked like James Harden. Just a shorter, huskier version. Yeah. You look, I mean, James Harden's that's how he looked like. You do look like James Harden though. Just a shorter, huskier version, yeah. You look, I mean, James Harden's husky.

He's not that husky. James Harden is husky. Not as husky as you, but you're not a professional athlete. James Harden not built like most basketball players. Like most guards. You're built like you talk about basketball. He's built like he plays basketball.

Well, that works out. Exactly. That's how it should be. Honestly, if you guys switch roles, I guarantee he'd be built like you. You'd be built like he plays basketball. Well, that works out. Exactly. That's how it should be. If you guys switch roles, I guarantee he'd be built like you. You'd be built like him. Honestly, he'd be built like he plays basketball sometimes. Who? James Harden. Yeah, it's not like a...

He plays basketball like a referee. Shout out to KFC from Barstool. He just sends me a random tweet, text, and he does it from time to time. He goes, So you're looking at your phone again. Interesting. I thought it would come. It would bring us up.

Shouts to KFC, man. Yeah. Black people fuck with Halsie or no? No, right? Halsie? Halsie, I think. Halsie. Yeah, I don't know.

I don't know. Yeah. I don't think black people. Alex, you listen to Halsie? Mm-mm. I didn't. I don't even know what that is, to be honest with you. Brown people don't fuck with Halsie.

Anyway. What is that? So if you're watching this episode, KS. So what are we thinking? Super Bowl. Go. I think the Chiefs are going to win. I think the Niners don't have as good of a pass defense, and they just got a lot of weapons,

the Chiefs. Yo, Sammy Watkins has been balling his fucking ass off. But he still always makes like one or two plays. I'm just like, what the fuck are you doing? What do you mean? I don't remember the exact plays, but I remember watching a little bit of the game. And I think he dropped an easy first down or something. And every time I'm like, this guy sucks.

Then he catches like a 50-yard pass every time. Because he got paid. He got paid good money. He got paid to come there, yeah. I think he would come from the Rams, I think. Yeah, I think he was on that really good Rams team. And he's their third best weapon. You got Tyreek Hill.

You got whatever, Nicole Hardman. You got him. They had Kareem Hunt before he kicked that bitch. Can you imagine if they still had Kareem Hunt? I don't even know who's playing running back for them. Who's their tailback? They got a kid in the draft who's alright. But that's what's so crazy. I had this exact

conversation yesterday. We were watching the game and we're like, oh my god, this is one of the best offensive teams I've ever seen. And then both of them looked at each other and're like, wait, who's the running back? Yeah. How do you have one of the best offensive teams you've ever seen? You don't even know they're fucking running back.

So a lot of these stats geeks are like, you don't really need to run the ball. You run just to keep teams honest and then you win by throwing. What do you mean? I thought it's the opposite in the playoffs. I thought just last week we're sitting here going just. Stats geeks don't care about the time. They're never like analytics. People are never.

They're never worried about what. Like, is it playoffs? Is it regular season? Whatever. They just let you never run on first down. You should always pass on first down. You pass more often. The teams that pass more always win more.

And yesterday was kind of a battle of that, which it was this amazing passing team. It's amazing running team. And then we saw something that you don't normally see historically is the amazing passing team won. Yeah, usually. They just ran up the score at a certain point. So what are you saying the stat geeks? Stat geeks are all about passing.

But they weren't surprised by that win? No. I remember one guy tweeted. He's a big stats dork that I follow on Twitter. Yeah. And he was just, he had, yeah, he had some, because he's a cowboy guy. But he had some things. He had nice eyes and shit.

If you throw it, I can't lean over. Yeah. No, he's just a cowboy guy. But he tweeted something about how, you know, there's some stat, like when Derrick Henry rushes for more than 100 yards, they're 75 and 0 or whatever. And he was like, some smug tweet that wasn't funny. But the idea was just, they're still going to lose this game,

and Derrick Henry's going to get his 100 yards. Derrick Henry touches your girl's butt. What do you do? Derrick Henry might gonna get his hundred yards. Derrick Henry touches your girl's butt. What do you do? Derrick Henry might actually get fucked up, yo. Bro, I mean, your girl's light enough. Just say she was white and tell somebody. And he's out of there. What would you do in the moment?

Touches your girl's butt. Ah, grab his ass, yo. If two could play at this game, now who's the bitch derrick henry and then look at my girl and be like i did that for you sharing this shit let's get weird you ever been to indonesia that's what i do i see how his battery life was on his phone i'd offer to charge it for him that's a tough one. A guy that size? That's a big motherfucker, bro. Touches my girl's butt?

Yeah. Squeeze. Squeezes the butt. Oh, yeah. I'd probably move my girl out of the way. Yep. And apologize to him. Say, yeah, something like that. I'm sorry, you know, she was in your way.

Something like that. Yeah, yeah, yeah. She'd be in the way. Because here's the thing. What are you going to do? You have to have a weapon. You can't just fist fight that guy. So I have to decide, do I kill him or...

Shoot him below the waist. Shoot, but what if I don't have a weapon? Honestly, I'd probably do this. I'd be like, man, come on. The fuck, dude? Fucking asshole. That's the most honest answer any of us get. Come on, come on.

I was like, oh, come on. What the hell am I supposed to do when you grab my girls at what? What am I supposed to do? You tell me, you fucking dick. You're a real fucking dickhead. Outside of just assaulting women you sure treat men like shit too now you make me look

fucking fucked up that's what I'd say I'd try to shame him I'd be like fuck you you fuck I'd be like come on babe

let's get out of here like a grandma come on oh man you know what else can you do in that situation nothing you can do

where am I where are we supposed to fight? Derrick Henry? I'd give my girl my cell phone and be like, baby, I did this for you. And take one swing. Oh, you would swing?

You gotta take one swing, but get on camera. So he loses all his money. Loses all his endorsement. Yeah, you hand your girl her phone, baby. Record. I did this for you. Hit record. That's what I'm saying. I did this for you. Hit record. That's what I'm saying.

I did this for you. Hit record. Take one swing and pray for the best, bro. Just pray for the best. You would take one swing. You got to take one swing. The guy gets hit in the head for a living. Listen.

By the biggest men on the planet. Also remember. And he makes them look small. He makes them look tiny. This is true. You for a living are talking. I am a talker. Okay? Some tweets. And tweets. But the thing are talking. I am a talker. Okay?

Some tweets. And tweets. But the thing is... That's what you should do. Tweet about it. If he's grabbing his ass, I'm assuming a lot of people in there... This motherfucker. Somebody's going to break it up.

You take one swing by somebody, hold me back. Oh, you're going to T.I. it? Of course. Yes. T.I. was so slick with Mayweather. You got to fucking... One big ass swing. I'm going to fuck you up. Super loud. what is it called loud super loud security i might be high

i'm residual akash for sure no that's the thing with a guy that size man you gotta you gotta find another way you gotta find another way take a swing and make motherfuckers break it up bro that's all you gotta do. I'm not stepping in, though. Put up the act. Who's stepping in between Derrick Henry and anybody? None of y'all? If you and Derrick Henry are beefing,

I'll try to de-escalate the situation. But I don't know how to step in. What do I do? Tackle him, then he comes after me? I'd be on the outside like, Guys, stop! Let's be reasonable. That's when you start acting. Nah, Andrew, you take him.

You give him those arms that you gave the bouncer in Sweden. Son, I couldn't push a 5'6 Swedish bouncer out the way. What I'm going to do with Derrick Henry, son. One fucking swim move. My man did swim move me.

He did. He did swim move me. We looked at the video Derek Henry Say what I haven't either I was lying about it I was trying to justify

What I did Derek Henry Would fucking body me Oh god What power Those guys have And they don't use it I'm sure

They're not human beings They're using it Whoa bro Whoa bro oh gosh taking us way back dude what kind of weed is this is this weed making races i couldn't let you have both. I'm not that high. Oh, God. Son, these people are fucking animals. This is the time I'm talking about black people.

Thank you. Thank you for clearing that up, Bacchus. Jesus Christ. On MLK Day 2, shit. What'd you say? On Martin Luther King. Shout out to Martin Luther King, man. What party are you going to celebrate, son? How are you said, on Martin Luther King. Yo, shout out to Martin Luther King, man. What party are you going to celebrate, son?

Oh, my God. How are you going to celebrate Martin Luther King? Yo, we saw the funniest parties. I'm going to twerk night. Twerk night looks so fun. Yo, what'd he say? Twerk for freedom or something? What was it?

Bro, pull him up. Pull him up. Pull him up. We got the five best Martin Luther King Day parties. We got the promo flyers for him. Bro, I've been seeing these shits for years. I legitimately want to go to one Alright so for everybody who's foreign and listening

Martin Luther King Was a civil rights activist In the United States of America And we get Martin Luther King Day off Every single year So off into Sunday before that Monday There's a party And black people will celebrate

Martin Luther King Day in historic fashion. Let's look at some of the parties that transpired last night. In remembrance of? In remembrance of the great Martin Luther King who was killed fighting for the rights of black people.

Fighting for their equality. By the government. By the FBI. Say again? He was killed by the FBI. Let's keep that straight. Was he? Yes, he was killed by the FBI to keep that straight was he? yes he was

oh I didn't know that absolutely the fucked up part about all these flyers is that they're all in like the bible belt so you know like he probably like

had speeches very close to these places so go to free at last is fantastic I mean that's the name of the party is perfect go to it and we ain't got the flyers I said in the group chat Free at last is fantastic. I mean, that's the name of the party. Perfect. Go to it.

Hey, we ain't got the flyers I set in the group chat? These are the vintage ones. Oh, gosh. The I Have a Dream Bash. Bad Bitch Sundays. Freedom to twerk. Freedom to twerk party is the most... MLK space.

Did you put his head on like Yo Gotti's body In one of the Flyers that we had They put the head on a guy doing the gun finger bro Oh my gosh This guy was about peaceful protest Flint y'all don't have anything better To worry about

God damn There was one with the blue car that was right above it. I was seeing. Never mind. No, there it is. Anyway, shout out to Martin Luther King, man. We appreciate you, dude.

The GOAT. Gang, gang. The GOAT. So, Akash. Yeah. What else we thinking? We have so much to discuss. We have Odell Beckham Jr.

I think Odell Beckham Jr. should be arrested for sexual assault. I'm being dead serious because you know he's gay outside of that 100 gay if you look at the video before he grabs his ass he stares at his ass he's it makes it sexual and he stared at that ass he looked at it he thought about it licked his lips a little bit sound You sound like the police, Andrew. Son, he sexually assaulted the officer because he made it sexual. Watch him.

First off, those cops are giving him shit. Watch him. Watch him. Watch him. Watch him. Watch him. Look at him. Look at him.

Wait for the officer to come through. Look how turned on he'll be, Dave. Hey, what about the big ugly Dave? Look at him. Matt turned on. My man wants that ass. My man wants that ass. My man wants that ass. Oh, yeah.

Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Yo, he backed off real scary. That was something else. He was watching him back off. I mean, I get it. That's something I would do. Yeah, I think context is key here.

Uh-oh. Son, he Harvey Weinstein, yo. That cop was giving the players shit for smoking cigars in the locker room. Right. They would tell him to put out the cigars or we can like press charges or whatever. Right. And that slopping ass was like, yo, they just won the fucking national championship. You're from Louisiana.

Obie J was acting like an asshole the whole day, yo. He was a little Frank the Tank with it. Like, he was a little- Frank the Tank. Yeah, he was like- Son, my man. What do you do when you go back to campus, though? Yeah.

Like, Odell's what, 24 years old? He's not that far removed from being on college, bro. I know when I go back to campus i'm granted i'm not odell beckham jr yeah i used to wild fuck you stay cabin for these crazy yo why yo what did he do mellow odell like do you have no ability to assess an attitude what's what attitude it's crazy how i'm not nobody's saying listen what all the joke you took the joke seriously about he should be in jail? Yeah. Because, you know,

whatever, you got to defend black people all the time. That's fine. Fuck you. All right. You really, I think you really smoked it back until like 1940s.

I get it. You and OBJ, that's six fifths of a human. What are you going to do? Wow. God damn. I'm high. Jesus Christ.

You're not high. This is how you're true feeling. All jokes aside, my point about- It's like the episode of Chappelle's show when they fucking the old weeds. And he was like, wrong bag, man. That was the real shit. No, my point about OBJ is not he should be in jail, but he just makes everything about him. Handing out money.

Okay, you want to give players money? You can easily do it in the locker room where you're going to go celebrate. Oh, Venmo. Doing it at the 50-yard line after the game where you know there's cameras around. Do you not think he's that stupid that he's like, what, people were watching? To be fair, I agree with you. It's like when you throw like $40,000 at the club,

you're not doing it for the strippers. You're doing it to be looked at. That's marketing. You want people to write about you. You want people to look about you. It's the same reason when you order bottles at the club and they come through with that big sparkler shit. You want everybody to know about you. You want people to look about you. It's the same reason when you order bottles at the club and they come through with that big sparkler shit.

You want everybody to know you ordered the bottles. And he was treating the players like some fucking strippers. And to be fair, he's a great marketer. But I don't care about having a great marketer on my team. No, because I want the team to be the thing that's marketed, not the player. I 1,000% agree with you thinking Odell was doing the most. But you got to, like I said, context is fucking key here when it comes to Odell Beckham and Louisiana State.

Like, he's Mr. Louisiana State. Like, his dad and mom are both All-Americans. His godfather is Shaq, for crying out loud. The guys he was dapping up are kids in addition to Burrow. Those are guys that are already fucking declaring for the NFL. So that was more or less like a fucking, it's the last game. You won a championship. You're going to the NFL. I can was more or less like a fucking, it's the last game, you won a championship, you're going to the NFL,

I can do this for you legally now. Like it's almost like a fuck the NCAA type of thing, which I thought was dope. What I didn't think was dope was a couple of the other videos that fucking popped out. See, if it was just that video. If it was just that, I'm like, that's actually fucking really cool.

We talked about it on Patreon. I was ready to go in and then you said all those guys had already declared. So I was like, all right, bet. But in addition to all the other videos, it's like, yo, you just constantly need attention. You are a hot bitch. If all the attention's out

on me, I will fucking die. I don't know what's gonna happen. So I'm just good on it. You don't think that there's any better way to get those kids that money? It's a congratulations. You don't think that there's any better way to get those kids that money. It's a congratulations. You don't think that there's any better way to get those kids that money. A way that doesn't bring

any attention to you. He's also a booster. You have access to the locker room. You know where their lockers are. You could literally get an envelope. It could say OBJ on the front so they know it's coming from you. You put it in their locker.

Nobody sees it. And you can't give money to kids directly. It doesn't matter if they give you a job where you get paid. I'm saying like the training room was named after him. He puts a lot of money into that fucking campus. So it's like he's Mr. LSU. Nobody's question that. We're saying, can you do this thing without making it about you, but rather making it about them? do this thing without making it about you, but rather making it about

them. When you ball up bread in public and then dap someone up with it, you know it's about you because you're the one giving the money. He's probably jealous. He's probably jealous from all those fire promos they've been doing. He's like, wait, no, no, no. I'm the hottest thing

out of LSU. I mean, those promos were unbelievable. They did a whole story on the kid. He's like a video coordinator that goes to school there. I'm like, that motherfucker is going to be... Son, if you listen to this podcast, DM me.

I want to give you a job, son. You're a real fucking talk, yo. I want to give you a job. You are fucking nice with it. You are amazing. A fucking amazing dog. And again, if it was just that, if it was fucking Chad Johnson or somebody who's like

not in the headlines all the time he's not even the best Muhammad Sanu that's fucking dope fuck the NCAA he did that for this reason with him with the context of everything else he's done it seems like I'm doing this for attention there's a thousand ways you can tell the NCAA fuck you without this

there's a specific video that came out and I was like which one? he might have been wilding. When he's like taking the mega horn and he's trying to get the LSU band to perform Neck, which is like a, it's a song about giving the head or whatever, but they play it. Like that's like their thing. Like they don't say, like this is the video right here. I'm like, he's for sure on the booger sugar. 1000%.

I'm like trying to grab the megaphone and he's fighting it off. I know drunk people. That's not alcohol. That's not alcohol. That right there is not alcohol. Oh, arrest him. That is the booger sugar, though. Oh, yeah, he's on cocaine.

And he's just being a douchebag. Like, he's being, if you guys can't see the video right now because you're listening, what he's doing is he's talking into a loudspeaker, one of those megaphones you hold in your hand, and there's a security guard trying to take it out of his hand very delicately and very nicely, by the way. And he takes the megaphone and he points it right in the security guard's face, and then he starts screaming neck into it. Not the first time he's probably asked for a blowjob from a man, but he's screaming it in his face nonetheless.

Oh, is it? Oh. Oh, shit. How much did we miss? No, you're good. It was just that second. Oh, okay. Well, anyway, that shit popped out.

That's how I know you are. This kid will be popping out on me, bro, even in this one. Anyway, point is, you guys probably missed a little bit of that. Point is, he's just being a dick. He's just fucking being a dick. Why do we even care? Because he's good. He's really good.

He's not worth the trouble, but he's really good. And why do we care about misfits that are good? Why are we drawn to them? What is he really doing? The great thing about the Odell shit is that we have perfect context for motherfuckers who are truly ancient, like Antonio Brown. He's on the league.

He could have been if he wasn't a fucking asshole. He is an asshole. The only thing Odell is guilty of to me is being fucking immature. Grow the fuck up. You don't need to do all that shit. Good point. There was a guy named Aaron Hernandez who was murdering people on a regular basis right right and he

managed to keep that shit outside the locker room consummate professional on the field he was a fucking consummate i guarantee you there are coaches in the league right now they're saying i wish obj had aaron hernandez's professionalism i think that's a reasonable thing it's the only thing holding them back bro it's the only thing he held me the fuck down for like two fantasy football seasons i thought aaron hernandez we can all use a little hernandez discipline i mean my man was about it so he was there he was playing. He was committed.

You never heard nothing until you murdered people, and then they found out, right? I think, I mean, what would you rather have? Honestly, if you have five years, here we go. If you have five years of elite playing ability, would you rather have, and there is an example, would you rather have and there is an example would you rather have obj who

is seemingly an adorable person and like cute he's just an egomaniac but he's never going to harm a single person or would you have or have we rather have consummate professional who in his off time is hanging around with gang members doing nefarious shit and might get locked up what would you rather talking straight football in between the lines. I'm a GM or a president of somebody. GM, president, coach, you have to make that decision. Do you know he's killing people? You do not know.

You're not certain, but you do not know. They drafted him with questions. They came in and... But the questions were weed. It wasn't, did this motherfucker kill someone? That's tough, yo. Like, he played for like...

Because that's how you feed your family. I feed my family with this game. He played for two of the greatest football programs. OBJ what? OBJ causing problems in the locker room. They don't win as much. That fucks up my bread. Now I can't feed my family.

Exactly. That fucks up. There's a lot of collateral damage. How many people are on that football team? 52? 52. Yeah. 52 people plus the coaches.

We're talking about a staff of maybe 100 people. 100 people. Minimum. Got families. Got families. OBJ is taking food out of their mouths. Aaron Hernandez is just killing one or two people. Just one motherfucker.

Just one family. And last time I checked. One meal. Last time I checked. Two meals. Five meals. Last time I checked, me and Odell Beckham Jr Have won the same exact

Number of playoff games Yo that's a valid ass point Ern Hernandez He got some dubs Under his belt And caught a touchdown In the Super Bowl go Yes

Ern Hernandez Balled out in that Super Bowl They lost But Gronk was out And Hernandez I remember being like This motherfucker He's nice

He's a killer He was a killer. He was a killer on the field. OBJ was on a yacht the fucking week before the Super Bowl and then kind of no-showed in the playoff game. Not the playoff game. And he got paid that summer. Odell Beckham was now killing people at the Super Bowl week. That's right.

Matter of fact, if he was killing people, we might not have that yacht incident. If he was killing people, he might still be in New York. He might still be in town and he might still be effective. He might be a practice. He's not all fucking seasick. There's got to be thousands

of unsolved mysteries in New York. Murder mysteries. I'll tell you that. There's been another. If Odell Beckham Jr. had some of that serial killer discipline to his game, that's the thing people

don't understand. He's absolutely still a New York giant. Son, a serial killer, I mean, well, I don't know if Aaron Hernandez is a serial killer. Not his commitment.

He was kind of lazy with it, though. What? But he was lazy with getting rid of the body. But only lazy with the murders. Son, the guy was waking up. You know why? Because he had to wake up to work out. I don't have time.

I got to get eight hours of sleep so I can be the best football player I can be. Bop, bop, we out. We out of here. I don't got time to find a nice patch for you to be murdered at. I'm going to murder at you close to home because what's at home? My gym. I have to be back. I have to be back to spend time with my daughter.

What was the first thing he did after murdering his best friend? Playing with his daughter. I haven't finished it. It's a family man. On the documentary, it sounds like he sounds so sweet to his wife and daughter. Bro, his wife was committed. Bow Wowess? Bow Wowess. She did look like Bow Wow. Mrs.-us? Bow-wow-us.

She did look like bow-wow. Mrs. Wow-us? We could say that now, but we would not say that Baron Hernandez was out there in the world. No, because he loves her. He loves her. She loves him. Gave up on her whole family. Okay?

Allowed him to kill her sister's boyfriend. How good of a boyfriend you gotta be? The chick said it looked like a black blob in his hand. I'm like, oh, this is clearly the murder weapon. The day after. She's in court. He's holding a gun. Clearly holding a gun.

They're like, what is that? I don't know what that is. Aaron Hernandez called her and basically said whatever you're looking for, it's in whatever, right? So that day, there's footage of her going to pick up some black bag and throwing something in the garbage. And they were like, oh, you don't think this is the same? He's like, oh, it just looks like a black blob to me.

It doesn't look like anything. I'm like, this bitch really took the stand and acted like a five-year-old. Who's doing that for Odell? To defend this bitch. Ain't nobody defending his character that knows him. Who's coming out after the LSU game that knows him? His teammate, Baker Mayfield, defending Miles Garrett, going to fucking fights with him.

He's trying to kill people. Odell, he's just like, eh, you know. I got no comment. Yo, that's a great point about Baker going to the fight with Miles because that's a statement. Yeah. That's the man of your organization that's standing behind Miles Garrett. I guarantee his manager and other people don't associate yourself with him.

You know, he has a bad rap. He assaulted somebody. He has that the other. Good for fucking Baker, yo. I love Baker, yo. I think I like this good Baker. Say what? That's my kind of white boy. He's not apologetic about

anything. He's just white and confident and somehow that became a crime. He's at those MLK parties. So time out. He's at one of the MLK parties. How do you have no problem with Baker Mayfield? But Odell Beckham is... I didn't like Baker. He said something. I think he kind of called out his teammates at one point thisham is... I didn't like Baker. He said something, and I think he kind of called out his teammates

at one point this year, and I didn't like that. I haven't heard 10 stories of him doing that. If it adds up, cool. In the grand scheme of things, alright, that's one thing. Outside of the Richard Milley shit, the Watt shit for Odell, I didn't really hear shit about him. Odell literally said week, like, 15,

I don't know if I'm going to be here next year, whatever God has in store for me. You could easily just no comment that. Okay. I don't know if I'm going to be here next year. Whatever God has in store for me. You could easily just no comment that. I don't know if I'm going to be here next year is already causing the controversy of will he be here next year. But Baker wasn't Baker talking a lot of shit to a lot of reporters. Hold on. Just acknowledge what I said. It's so blatant that he was a douchebag this year.

You didn't see it. Asking the other teams to pick him up. Yes, I did see having Tom Brady autographed autograph his goatskin sneakers or whatever the fuck. You got the opposing quarterback's sneakers. That was hearsay. Great. Okay, granted. No, you had his autograph.

A lot of players do that, though. A lot of players exchange fucking memorabilia. Brady acts for Odell's shit because apparently Tom Brady's son is a huge Odell Beckham Jr. fan. So he gave him the jersey. He gave him the sneakers. I'm just saying, if you're going to, like, I understand if you got something against Odell, like, just be factual. They were goat skin sneakers that he had Tom Brady sign for that game because he's the goat. Yes.

Bruh, fine. You're marketing. That's cool. But I don't, if I'm a coach, I don't need my best player marketing. I need him playing. Nobody talking shit about Jarvis Landry. It's not a race issue. Jarvis Landry's great. He don't need my best player in marketing. I need him playing. Nobody talking shit about Jarvis Landry. It's not a race issue. Jarvis Landry's great.

He don't talk. He don't yap. And let this be clear. We don't care about Odell Beckham Jr. We don't have anything against Odell Beckham Jr. We have something against a behavior that he is choosing to display. So if he doesn't display that behavior, then nobody gives a fuck. He's asking for this himself. He's making choices.

And Beckham's been in the league, what, five, six years? I think five. This is Mayfield's second year. And if Mayfield does more fucking, and I'll tell you this, I don't like Mayfield doing these Home Depot commercials and his team sucks dick. Now I think he thought the team would be good. If he films more this offseason and they suck dick next season,

hey man, the fuck are you doing? Here's the thing, when you do those type of commercials, those are multi-year good. If he films more this offseason and they suck dick next season, hey, man, what the fuck are you doing? Here's the thing. When you do those type of commercials, those are multi-year things. So he's going to be doing them fucking commercials. Hey, man. You just got to fucking win. You got to take some smoke if you don't win.

That's what it is. You got to fucking win, bro. I think this year was like a nice little grace period. Everyone has a little sophomore slump or whatever. That's what I've chalked it up to. Yeah. I'm like, bro, you still see it. You still see the talent in him.

It's not like he's fucking Ryan Leaf out there that just looks like he fucking forgot how to throw a football. You still see the immense talent in him. It's just that sophomore stuff just fucking happens, especially when you throw a bunch of brand-new players and don't really get protection, but you get these shiny new pieces and toys, and you got to make it work because you had one good season as a rookie when nobody had tape on you. I understand if your second year isn't as good. This year though,

he got a ball to fuck up. He got a ball out. Pressure's on. That's it. I'm with it. That's fine. Odell been in the league five, six years.

I've had enough. I didn't hate him. I mean, I hated him his second year because he was with the Giants, but I wouldn't talk in this shit in his second year. Whatever.

He's in his second year. But boy, now fifth, sixth year, you acting more immature than college Whatever, he's in his second year. But boy, now, fifth, sixth year, you acting more immature than college kids? He's in a room full of LSU kids. What LSU kid

is slapping the cop's ass? Alright, the cop is an asshole. Nobody argues that. Cop is an asshole to the LSU kid with a cigar. He actually won something.

Odell's never done that in his life. This kid actually won something. What does he do? They're saying this bullshit, puts out the cigar, whatever. Odell, grown ass man, in his life. This kid actually won something. What does he do? They're saying, this bullshit, puts out the cigar, whatever.

Odell, grown ass man, in his mid-20s, slaps the cop's ass and then talks shit to him. He's, who's more immature in that situation? The college kid

with something to celebrate or the fucking loser hanging out at the college party? And apparently, allegedly, they were going to charge him with sexual battery and they were like,

they just made it sexual. They sexually assaulted him. He looked at his ass. He fucking licked his mouth and then he slapped it. That guy sexually assaulted that cop. And he should be horrified. It was disgusting. I mean, honestly, if you sent Odell to jail, it wouldn't be that bad for him.

It's like the ideal situation I come to football practice because there's these guys that work out all the time they're super buff the only problem is they don't fuck me but this prison shit is lit what do you think you do do you think if you go to prison and you're gay

you play coy like you're not gay you gotta act like you don't want it like these hoes the thrill's in the chase bro honestly i don't think the prisoners wanted if it's easy too that's the thing like do you play the rape card or do you go full gay and then just try to get the guys that want just friction well i mean what are you more into i assume there's more it's more of a dominance thing huh than it is i just need to be touched thing i think a lot of motherfuckers in there aren't like super gay but they're just like i I assume it's more of a dominance thing than it is I just need to be touched thing.

I think a lot of motherfuckers in there aren't like super gay, but they're just like, I got to let motherfuckers know I'm running this. I'm going to fuck this pretty ass boy right here. Not how my luggage would go at all, but I... I mean, there's other ways to prove that you're tough. Alex, when you went to jail and you wanted to prove you were tough... How did you establish dominance in Sweden, Alex? Did you put the Ikea furniture together without the wrench? I'll show you were tough. How did you establish dominance in Sweden, Alex? Did you put the Ikea furniture

together without the wrench? I'll show you how tough I am. I'm going to use my pinky nail to slowly screw it in. It's funny. I didn't get any of that feeling in the jails over there. Explain.

Because you wanted it? No. I'm talking about there's no like macho. There's no like, oh, I run shit here. What about when you shower? You have a private room.

You shower by yourself? Yeah. It's like a bathroom. Sounds run shit here. What about when you shower? You have a private room. You shower by yourself? Yeah. It's like a bathroom. Sounds like a hotel. And then they lock it and the security guard stands outside of it. To protect you from rape?

I don't know. They're just very secure of everything that happens. So it's like, you have to write your name that you're going in the bathroom. You have to write your name if you're doing laundry

and all that shit. So there's a record of everybody going anywhere. And they didn't put you in like a special jail away from Swedeners. Because you were American. You don't think they were giving you special, I don't know,

Swedish mufflocks? Swedeners? I like some tasty candy right there. Jesus Christ. Y'all know what the fuck I meant, god damn it. Not even that rare a country, right? But Aaron Hernandez They were saying

What are those fish Called Swedeners fish Swedeners Swedeners You want to have Some Swedeners meatballs Over there Let's have some

Swedeners meatballs Man Yo but In the doc They were saying That Aaron Hernandez Was He felt so comfortable

He was just happy That he was in there So now he can be Openly gay He sounded like Them phone conversations just happy that he was in there. So now he can be openly gay. He sounded like, them phone conversations sounded like he was on vacation. Yeah, like, who sounds that comfortable? Those are two things Aaron Hernandez wants most.

Structure and dick. Just put them together. Structure and destructure. Just collapse that colon. Dude, imagine banging Aaron Hernandez. That's a trophy fuck right there. That is, bro. Hang that on your wall.

What do gay guys do? Like, you should have, you know how like hunters have like the antlers for the. I think I'm a little high, dude. I think all of us are a little high. I said Swedeners. They have the antlers, right? You know the antlers go there, right? Like, if you were like a big game hunting gay,

would you just get like molds of their asses and then hang them all around your like man cave? Just be like, oh yeah, that was a Filipino. I remember taking that down. That was July. A picture of you after you fuck them like this? They're just gaped wide open. You got a Pepsi can in there to show what you did. It was July. A picture of you after you fuck them like this? They're just gaped wide open.

You got a Pepsi can in there to show what you did. Oh my God. Wouldn't that be crazy? I didn't know what to say. There had to be

something you put in there. Maybe a Mexican Coke because it's like that glass bottle. It's a little slender. It's a little slender but you start with the back. It looks impressive.

You start with that back end, bro. And you can just kind of play with it as it hangs in there bro that's gay or you could just put them okay you have like 10 of them bend over, right? And then you put the Mexican Coke bottles down their buttholes, right? But you do small end first so that the back end is up, right? And then that glass is flat against their buttholes. And then you just get a couple like drumsticks and play it like a Caribbean instrument.

You know what I'm saying? In the summer, like ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding. Under the sea, ding, ding, subway, yeah. Under the sea. Under the sea. Down where it's wet. Down where it's wet. Take it from me. Steel drums are what they call it.

Yes. They call steel drums. Steel drums. Listen, guys. Not all these ideas are going to be great. I had to commit. You know what I mean? My back hurts going to be great. I had to commit. You know what I mean? My back hurts.

You fucking commit. I got raped. God, my fucking guy. Limbs are still real loose. So that's how gay you are. You get raped to ease the pain. To ease it. I was like, distract me.

Okay, what else we got, Akash? I hadn't got my phone with all the topics on it. Because he got my sushi. Yeah, the McGregor fight. McGregor fight. I actually ordered that shit, man. We got to bring back flagrant thoughts. I think I might be high, too.

But flagrant thoughts. Man, we did forget flagrant thoughts of the week. Yeah, that's a great way to start. Yeah, listen, guys. We're going to start starting with the flagrant thoughts again. That's way better. But Conor beating Cowboy. flagrant thoughts again that's way better but connor beaten cowboy um the great thing about this fight for mma for the ufc for everything is we all want connor to be dominant we all want our

most interesting uh athletes to be successful and because it makes the shit talk even better and the way that he beat the shit out of cowboy serrani i mean in exciting and very very efficient quick fashion i mean 40 seconds it was over now the world is his again we forget that he lost we forget that he lost it's been a year and a half since he lost we forget that he he in my opinion lost both fights against nate they say he won one we forget that he, in my opinion, lost both fights against Nate. They say he won one. We forget that he got his ass kicked by Khabib. Like, all those things are gone. What do they say about sports?

It's like, especially the fight game, like you have amnesia. Like a big win gives you amnesia. Okay, yeah. And that's what happened. And now we got the situation where the world is his. He could rematch Floyd. Though I'm not that interested, but I'm sure they could find interest in it. He could fight Masvidal.

He could fight Usman. Didn't Floyd tweet or Floyd put on IG that they wanted to do the rematch? And then he put on IG Floyd fighting Khabib. So he's just fucking around. But Conor could do whatever he wants now and we're interested in it because now we can run with the narrative of, wow, look how dominant Conor is.

Let me ask you a question. Do you like humble Conor? He was mad fucking humble. So here's the thing. I think this is the first time we saw Conor fight someone who he really likes. Okay. And I think, and that's why there was no shit talking in the promo. There was no shit talking about it. Matter of fact, even in the promo and the buildup, he was like, I'm very excited to get Cowboy his first multi-million dollar payday.

And I think he really likes Cowboy. He respects him. And he's like, listen, I need a tune-up fight to build some excitement so I can bust their ass. This guy deserves it. I like him. And he's got a good name. It'll be a fun build-up.

Now that that's out the way, I think every fight after this is mortal enemy. Oh, everything's on the table now. Everything's on the table. I would love to see Masvidal. That's all I was going to say. I tweeted right before the fight. I'm like, Dana wants this Everything's on the table. I would love to see Masvidal. That's all I was going to say. I think, I tweeted right before the fight, I'm like,

Dana wants this fight more than the oxygen. Yeah. Very good Masvidal fight. Like, that is... And Masvidal's playing it smart because Masvidal came out today on, I think,

Errol Hawani's podcast and he goes, I think I'd rather fight Usman than Conor. Like, he's trying to feel like he don't want the fight. But that fight, they both,

first of all, they both speak English. They both can talk shit. I'm tired of them trying to promote fights where nobody speak English. Everything, yeah, the fight is going to be great. I care about the casual fan. I'm going to watch it for the striking if it's a boxing. But the casual fan just cares about personality.

They want to see this flag against this flag. They want to see this mean guy against this guy. I don't know anything about technical fighting. Exactly. So you just want to see the beef. I want to see this flag against this flag. They want to see this mean guy against this guy. I don't know anything about technical fighting. Exactly. So you just want to see the beef. I want to see the interesting people. Give me the interesting people. And all I remember about Conor is that he was the only guy I saw out shit talk Floyd.

Oh, he body Floyd. Yo, Floyd looked like meek up until the fight. Why you got a backpack? You can't even read. Son. That shit was so good. He was the one calling responses in the crowd. He was like, on tree, everybody say, fuck the Mayweathers.

One, two, tree, fuck the Mayweathers. I was like, yo, this motherfucker's a rock star, dog. Holy shit. Fuck you, pinstripes, dog. The fuck you, pinstripes? He had it down. Holy shit. He had it all the way down.

But he was talking a lot of shit about how he felt like doing all that shit let down like his irish fans i think i think that's why well that's what he said why he wasn't really talking a lot of shit maybe everything you said was correct i spoke to cowboy i would speak to irish people whenever i was in whenever i was in pubs right and because i'd be asking about his whiskey okay which they all say is dog shit. Really? I think it's delicious. Very funny timing of that. Proper 12 is shit whiskey that the 12 on it is not the years

aged. 12 is like the area code for the city of Dublin, but they put 12 because most people just go, oh, it must be 12 years. No, no, no. Proper 12, that's great. So there's no way that you could have... Proper 12. That's great. Proper 12.

So there's no way you could have 12-year-old whiskey because you just started the whiskey business last year. Did you know 12 years ago before you were ever a millionaire that you were going to have a multi-million dollar

whiskey company? Of course not. So it's shitty whiskey. That being said, the branding is beautiful. And if there's one thing we know about the alcohol game, it has nothing to do

with the flavor. It's all about branding. It's all about the branding. The Ciroc. C if there's one thing we know about the alcohol game, it has nothing to do with the flavor. It's all about branding. It's all about the branding. The Ciroc. Shitty vodka. All these things. Jameson, Jack Daniels, all these things. It's genius.

So. Casamigos. Casamigos is George Clooney. Yeah. That's why all these celebs get into it, is because it all tastes like shit. Only like the real alcoholics could tell the difference between like a really nice vodka and another one.

They're not trying to sell quality. They're trying to sell quantity. I'm famous. I could move these cases. I'd make a shit ton of money. Yes, put my name on it. That's a bag. But what were we saying before my high state made me forget?

We were talking about Irish people. Oh, yeah. So every one of these bartenders at a pub would say the same thing. They'd go, hey, I don't really like Connor anymore. I go, why not? It's too cocky. It's too brash, whatever. This is while he was winning?

This is maybe in the last year. So maybe he lost to Khabib. But even before the Khabib fight. And the same reaction from all of them was, it's not very irish like we're not very like arrogant people we're not talking to people like we're kind of humble and we don't like seeing our celebs be too arrogant and brash we like seeing our celebs be nice i mean look at the u2 guy he got to try to save the planet just so irish people like him still yeah right like he bono yeah it's like he got to pretend he just so Irish people like him still. Bono.

He got to pretend he's blind so people like him still. He wear these glasses because he's light. It's constant humility just to keep the home team on your side. Not like Americans. We love the most arrogant. Look at our president every single day. We love our athletes to be arrogant as fuck, bro.

We are the best. We want to shit on you every time we we love our athletes to be arrogant as fuck bro like we are the best we want to shit on you every time we can we want to pump usa shoot guns yes big tits yes like that is america now here's the thing i think it's easy to say someone is arrogant when they're losing and nobody wants to stop liking a winner. And I really think that Conor knows that his bread is buttered in America and not Ireland. And he knows what works in America. And I think he will try to appeal to the Irish fans.

He'll wrap that flag around himself. But when it's time to cut a promo, you're going to see the arrogance come back out. He came out after the fight. He was pretty humble the whole time. And after the fight, he was like's pretty humble all the time and after the fight he was like you know all these fools he's like i'll take on any one of these whatever the fuck he called them and shit like yeah fools whatever like just you know he was still trying to be humble he's still trying to you know thank everybody for support yada yada

yada like it's great he's like hugging cowboy's mom or or grandma and shit like doing real classy shit but you know like everybody wants that McGregor bag, bro. He's the MMA's Mayweather. It's like everybody knows if you fight this motherfucker, you're probably going to get the biggest payday of your life. Most pay-per-views. I ordered a fucking pay-per-view. I'm like, I never order fucking MMA pay-per-views.

I'll stream the show. I was like, nah, I want to watch it on my big TV. And fucking granted, it was a quick fight. I got what I paid for. I want to see a motherfucker be a star. I want to see the famous dude that I came to watch. I don't want to see him get knocked out. I don't want to see that sad shit.

I want to see some cool fucking shit. And he delivered, bro. So like, kind of like Tyson fights. Shouts to Izzy, by the way. Izzy's going to fight Romero. Yeah. Which will be a tough fight. I think that's why he's been in the gym all the time.

All these pictures I see of Izzy, he's like lifting weights. I never saw him lifting weights before. He ain't fucking around. But Romero is a big, muscular motherfucker with a wrestling background.

He's more of a striker now, but he is, that's a big motherfucker and a legend. And he's had, I don't know, he's coming off a few losses, but he's still a legend

in that division. And Izzy's going to obviously take care of business. Izzy got that, son. Yeah. He'll have his word cut out for him. Because Romero's going to try to strike with Izzy, and nobody can strike with Izzy. Now, if Romero starts wrestling, that's where it gets tricky

because Izzy's background is not wrestling, and Romero's been wrestling since he was a kid in Cuba, right? So it will be an interesting situation. If Romero checks his ego and just says, hey, I'm bringing this to the ground, then it's going to be, Izzy's going to have to catch him. But I think Izzy catches him regardless. Now, if Romero even tries to exchange with him, that's lights out. I think that's lights out.

One thing I was going to say about the fight. Did you see at the weigh-in or whatever, who was the girl that was supposed to be keeping you explain this to me there's this video that went viral at best by some guy tried to like shoplift and run out of the store and this bitch just gets in the way this hawaiian girl and just starts blocking like a straight offensive line like perfect form i was like goddamn she was low and low center of gravity i was like whoever the best left tackle in the league is that's what the fuck i guess yeah that's what i was gonna say because i'm a cowboy fan but i don't know if there's somebody better but then dana white was like this is amazing i'm gonna take care of this girl whatever i'll he said something i guess she got she got fired from best oh he got yes doing that too much

but goddamn like look at this samoan ass bitch bro protect that quarterback fired yeah i guess i guess she was doing a little too physical. She was too physical, they said. I mean, the guy's trying to steal a big box item. Fuck this dude. And isn't this some... I've never worked retail, but anybody who's worked retail, can't you, like, legally not chase them out? Oh, yeah. You're not supposed to do anything, right?

Right. They told me that shit. I was working for Quicksilver Boy Rage Club, and they said, listen, if anybody steals and they run out, just let them go. And I remember looking at my boss like, you thought I was going to chase you? You thought for $8.50 an hour

I was going to chase someone who was willing to commit a crime? For $8.50 an hour, you really thought that? Oh my God. Mind-boggling to me. To steal a shirt that's probably not even worth the wage you're getting. Son, what's the incentive to not steal, though? What is that again?

What's the incentive to not steal? You high, son. I know, because I can't put that sentence together you just said. What's stopping me from stealing, then? Oh, what's stopping you from stealing? People don't know that. Hey, y'all do now. About 100 plus thousand people just found

out. I mean, there's mall security. I guess that's their job. Sometimes there's some very intimidating female security guards in their little business suit. You know when they give them female security guards in gray pants and that little blue blazer? Like, that's supposed to stop me from stealing? Son, that's the green light.

If I see some, like, 5'4 black chick with cornrows and a fucking teardrop tattoo she's snoop she looks like snoopy young man i'm like you know what you got it she looks like she plays center for the new york liberty i'm like you know what you got it i'm not chasing you but for real think about that yeah even security guards like what um i did security for a little bit when i was doing law enforcement just for some side money. And I was in Trader Joe's. And they told the same thing. Even though I'm here as a security guard, if I see somebody steal, I'll just call a manager.

Son, who steals an organic pear? Nah, yo. You know who stole the most? Who? Old motherfuckers. Oh, word. Yeah, old ladies. They try to play dumb.

Old ladies. What would they steal? Like anything. They don't give a, old ladies. They try to play dumb. Old ladies. What would they steal? Like, anything. They don't give a fuck, yo. They don't even try to hide it. What do they do? Like, they just walk in. They'll come in with their bag.

They just put it in the bag and they leave. So they forget. Nah, man. That's Alzheimer's. They make you think. That's the jig, bro. They're up on game. They know that they can't do shit.

Yo, low-key, I think my dad, like, induced his own Alzheimer's. I really think So he can steal shit? I truly believe that what he did was He found a way to stop Listening to my mom Because sometimes when my mom talks I'll be trying to tune it out And I think what my dad did

He's got so good at tuning it out He's just tuned everything out Yo I have a bit about how I Real talk He'll be asking me shit like you want to get some food And I'll be like nah it's too good Yeah real talk Cause he'll be asking me shit Like you wanna get some food And I'll be like Nah it's good

And a few minutes later He'll be like You wanna go get some food And I'll be like You really not listening And I'm like You're a genius So I have a bit

About how I envy dudes With Alzheimer's Like you don't ever Have to remember Nothing this girl said Yeah My girl expects me To remember every fucking thing

She's ever said In the history of our relationship And you know what She'll be more appreciative When you remember anything. If I have Alzheimer's? If you have Alzheimer's. Yeah, bro, I remember one thing. She's gonna start tearing up. You gotta establish

that shit early, bro. You gotta establish that you don't remember shit early. I've done a good job of that. I establish I don't remember. My memory is shit, though. Early. Early. My memory was great until I met my girl.

Now she just be filling up my memory bank. With what? I got a joke about this. I said, you ever watch the movie where the ship is sinking and there's water coming in the boat

and the fucking sailor? I said, the boat is my memory and the water is her shitty stories. She's trying to stay afloat. Does she hear you talk about her stories being bad and then like does she try to spice them up

no I think because I put her so much in my act she's like whatever I'm doing is making us money so fuck it so she's leaned into I don't know cause she sees she'll go to my shows she listens to it she's to her credit she don't ever give me shit about my material ever which is great cause I make

fun of her all the time. But I think a part of her is like, this is great. Hey, listen, I get to act how I act. He makes money. This is all perfect. He gets material. That's love your life. I would assume that's what you would do. Is there anything that you won't make a joke about that she does?

I don't. I mean, I'm sure if we have like a really bad fight or whatever. But I even have a joke about a pretty big fight we got into. Now I did it with her in helium and it was actually kind of fun. She was in the audience. Cause it was like a moment where I could be like, Oh baby, you don't know.

I do this on stage yet. But, and then I'll be like, if you ask her, her version probably different. And then she's there listening to it for the first time. And then afterward, didn't bring it up.

Wasn't like a car fight. And we were going home. She was just rock with it. She was cool. Do you think she's saving it? You know how like chipmunks hide chestnuts? Let me tell you something.

My girl don't save nothing. Really? She not a saver. She spends these fights. She lets you know right there. She spends these fights. Yo. Yo, Miles.

As soon as she gets it. She got gold. Like a kid with fucking Sally Mae money just throwing it everywhere. Yo, I've been thinking about this college loan shit. Maybe we got to cut that out.

Yeah, yo. That's why Bernie got my vote, bro. Who? That's why Bernie got my vote. Who's Brandy? Bernie Sanders. Oh, I didn't mean

like we pay it off. Just cancel it. No, I didn't mean that. I meant off Just cancel it No I didn't mean that I meant like stop giving it out So how are you going to go to school How are you going to go to school Everybody got to go to school We're the only country that

Charges a harm to the lake for college Say again It's going to be a lot of people not going to school Look listen it's very important to have an educated populace Right But it hasn't really worked out for us so far. Right? Like, you know, I want to sit back here and say, oh, it's so important that we're so educated.

But like, I don't think people learn that much after high school. Five people in here all got college degrees, I assume. Yeah. Who of us is using a college degree? I used a little math once at a diner. Not for a bill. Nah. And me and the waiter had to do it together.

I think I spoke about it on the podcast, right? But I use a little bit of some algebra there. Other shit from school, I don't know. With all the shit available on the internet, on Reddit, documentaries. Documentaries. You know how many documentaries I've watched? We just took an Aaron Hernandez history class. Aaron Hernandez.

Like, I don't know if college is as necessary with the internet now. Before the internet, you needed to go to college just so you could be around the books. But now with the internet, Al taught himself how to do a whole fucking audiovisual shit. Edwin, did you go to school for anything? Yeah, for film. You did? Why Al better than you with that shit? fucking audio visual shit. Edwin, did you go to school for anything? Yeah, for film. You did? Wow, better than you with that shit.

Well, that makes your fucking case. What the fuck is you? But my point is like, you went to school for film and you know you've probably used YouTube to learn other shit. Oh, undoubtedly. Just as effective, is it not? Most of the stuff has been outside of school.

Isn't that crazy? And you have a more traditional background. You understand lighting and all these balances and all that kind of stuff, 100%. But you can learn that shit from online. Oh, yeah, no doubt. I'm going to be honest with you guys. We got to cut out school. I think I'm high.

Yo, think about this. Let's go back to you being high. While we're all high, now we're going to have a nice high pontificate conversation. I like it. I studied psychology in school. Gay? Gay! 100%.

We gay bros. I did it too. Right. Look. So, I studied psychology in school, right? I read one Malcolm Gladwell book. Yeah. It referenced every single study that I took in school.

What's the point? What's the point of this college shit? It's a racket, B. I'm good. I had enough. No, hit that one more time. It's not even weed. Go.

Now we're in it. Where else are you going to... Fuck, I just forgot. Are you sure this is CBD, motherfucker? Shout out to CBD company, Gary. I think I'm in good good. Make sure. Goddamn.

Yeah, this shit is hot. This got a little weed in it. Oh, no, it's 16% weed. 16? No, we getting high. Oh. No, we getting high. My bad.

My bad. My bad. My bad. No, because I didn't. My bad. My bad. My bad. No, because I didn't. My bad. My bad. That's on me. That was on me.

That's on me. What can I do? What can I do at this point? Oh, my God. You're already here. I'm going to leave the podcast. Just tell them to pay me more money. That's all. Oh, my God. We already here I'm gonna leave the podcast Just tell them to pay me more money That's all

Oh my god We already here man Oh that gets a little hot Yo the The back end of it Tastes a little It's got a little Got a little kick

A little kick at the end Alright So back to the school loan shit Right We should take some Some edibles too So Oh you can keep that shit bro What I did not put the edibles too. Oh, you can keep that shit, bro.

What? What's the THC on them? It's CBD. It's just CBD. Oh, it's all CBD? Okay, okay. I'm taking them all. Okay, so.

It's just OD on CBD. Imagine we OD on CBD. That'd be so funny. Shout out to Radix Remedies. Shout out Radix. We need more Real Talk. Andrew using it all up. Son, I brought it here so we would all have it. Real Talk, shout out to Radix Remedies. Shout out Radix. We need more Real Talk. Andrew using it all up. Son, I brought it here so we would all have it.

Real Talk. Shout out to Radix Remedies. Go to RadixRemedies.com slash flagrant, man. And use our code. I just came from the gym, too. This feels good. Good CBD afterwards. You do a little CBD after the work.

Yeah, it feels good. But for real, check out that website, man. Bring that website up real quick. Because I want to give them the realest, most organic situation organic situation they hit us up afterwards by the way the first episode and they said that the flagrant 2 asshole army was running into the store not playing around honestly radix radix remedies.com use our code flagrant you go radix remedies.com slash flagrant um they got a dope cannabis giveaway i mean they got these pre-rolled joints that are cbd we thought i think they snuck some weed in ours because i feel a

little fucked up i'm not gonna lie um son they have this free giveaway right check it out this is what happens you get an eighth of weed a week or cannabis or cbd whatever it is the flower okay looks just like a joint. You get an eighth a week for a year. All you got to do is sign up for that shit. Yeah, an eighth is a nice amount too. Yo, these gummies are legit. Try these.

What's this? It's like a Sour Patch, Kip. Oh, yeah. They got sweet ones. They got this shit called Neuro Root. This is crazy. It's for focus. First of its kind, cannabis nootropic, right? It's got... Oh, God, it's for focus first of its kind cannabis nootropic right it's got oh god phosphatidylcholine it's used in either tinctures proves your mood your memory memory cognitive

function i get my pops on this shit you get the effects of choline in 15 minutes as opposed to the hour and a half that takes to kind of step step into your system. CBD plus the choline. You're not playing around. They got those pills I was going to give to you for sleep time with the melatonin. Be careful with those. You'll sleep like a fucking baby. Just be very careful with those. And you got, which I think my favorite thing is, is the CBD

joints. Because I like having a little smoke. I like having a little smoke. It's relaxing. It's relaxing. Just bring it on the road. Yo, 100%. The pre-rolls. I got a grip of the pre-rolls. Boom. That's kind of what I want I like having a little smoke It's relaxing It's relaxing Just bring it on the road Yo 100% Yeah The pre-rolls I got a grip on the pre-rolls Yeah

Boom That's kind of what I want After a show Son That's perfect That's what I'm saying I was just telling Al After

We're Like after a show I don't know how to speak I don't know how to speak son I don't know how to speak Hey y'all What's up It's Chelsea

I don't know how to speak hey y'all what's up it's shelsey i don't know how to speak so i was just telling al right so there's been a couple of times where i've been like what the fuck did you just say when you said what was the name of the store you worked in quicksilver boarding yeah you slurred board writers club i had to use context clues to figure out what you were i'm assuming the quicksilver shorts right that's what it is yeah maybe it's just hard to say but it was like when i said it i was like damn i nailed that i literally was so confident i was like i said all those words in a row mad fast they probably not even catching up with me too coherent too coherent your boy out here, too coherent. I'll just use context because I'm assuming that's what he meant.

So what happens after a show is I'll have a drink because the energy is so high and it's so intense and I want a nice calm down. And what I've realized. He's so hot that just the word come down made him laugh. I wanted a nice come down. That don't sound not gay. I wanted a nice come down. Don't sound... That don't sound not gay. I don't get it. What do you mean?

I just wanted a nice come down. Like come the actual sperm? Yeah. Just requesting relaxation. It sounded like you get hosed down. Oh, that's what he wanted? He's a little hot. He really did smoke himself racist.

So he smoked himself racist? Smoked himself gay? Smoked himself homophobic? That's not racist. That's a Southern thing. The hose down? I'm thinking like, you know. Are you talking about hosing down Martin Luther King on his fucking birthday, dude?

Come on, guys. Have some respect, man. No, MLK was not hosed down. He was taking him hosed down, though. Shots to the goat, man. I knew there was something there. Have some respect, man. Oh, man. No, MLK was not hosed down. He was taking them hosed down, though. Shots to the goat, man. I knew there was something there, but I was too high to think of it. You were too high to think of it. Sometimes that shit just be flowing, bro.

Quicksilver Boar Rides Club. Say that shit 10 times fast, you motherfucking nerd. Quicksilver Boar Rides Club. Pinky rang on a pinky rang, big little bitch. Remember that shit? Be careful. What is the line the future says? 100 grand, cheapest ring on a pinky rang, big little bitch. Remember that shit? Be careful. What is the line the future says?

100 grand cheapest ring on a pinky ring, little bitch. Woo. Say it again. 100,000 cheapest, it's like 100,000 for the cheapest ring

on a finger, little bitch. Woo. But there's an N word in there. There's something missing. 100 grand on a ring, little bitch. Woo.

No. 100 grand on the cheapest ring on a motherfucker that suck my dick. Woo. Oh yeah. 100 grand cheapest ring On a motherfucker That stuck my dick Who Oh yeah 100 grand Cheapest ring

On a finger Little bitch You can say the word bro I know I'm saying it for you Not only are you black You are dressed in purple That makes you double black

100,000 Cheapest ring On a nigga Little bitch Woo Oh that's all bro That shit slaps yo Anyway I think

What I've always wanted For the come down After the show Is what the effects That weed give me But sometimes weed Is too intense I'll be hung over

The next day But this feeling That I have right now This relaxation The mood is set Y'all feel it in your tits I feel it I feel it

No bullshit Y'all feel it in your tits Or not I feel it Nah I feel like if you Touch your tits It would feel it in my tits Y'all feeling your tits or not? I feel it. Nah. I feel like if you touch your tits, it would feel it in my tits. Y'all feel it.

Can you touch your tits? Yo, yo, yo, yo. I got to do that show. I'm so pink. Pop that titty, bro. Just go like that with it. Pop that titty one time. Nah, dog.

I'm good. Violated Kevin. Come on, bro. Don't OBJ him, dog. You can't be doing that shit. He just OBJ'd him. He just OBJ'd him, son. I'm Come on, bro. Don't OBJ him, dog. He can't be doing that shit. He just OBJ'd him. He just OBJ'd him, son. I'm pressing charges, yo.

Really? What? You mean OBJ'd him? Oh, gosh. If he wants it. If I want it, bro. He's already in a sweatsuit. I'm going to get it.

Nothing I could do. Bro. What would you do? I'd run for sure. I'd run. I'm shifty. I'm mad shifty. I got long arms, bro Whoa, I got a lot of long on me. Whoa

Oh River I'm a real That's what I'm saying We might need this Go check out Radix See if y'all fucks with it What's up I gotta apologize

I think I'm responsible For your back Hey Yo Revelations No no no Chapter 12 Verse 10

Why y'all not tell them That already dog My bad Damn son So we was in Did you say reverations I said revelations we was in uh new orleans and i bought a voodoo doll and put like he's working too hard right we put andrew's hair

on it and we were fucking with it a little bit and he was like he was like yo i'm uh don't fuck with that shit i don't fuck with that shit like he really trusts voodoo dolls and i think that shit works who wants to yeah i'll trust that shit why would don't fuck with that shit. Like he really, I don't trust voodoo dolls. And I think that shit works. Who wants to? Yeah, I don't trust that shit. Why would anybody trust that shit? but do you think that you fucked my back up with the voodoo doll? I might've.

So you fucked a voodoo doll? I mean, that's how you broke his back? I broke that back. What'd you do to it? Wait, do you have the voodoo doll? I come down.

Oh man. Oh yeah, I should've Brought it in I had it out You should bring the Voodoo doll for Anytime Y'all don't feel like

Touching your tits bro Not even a little bit Y'all don't even Like that Just with one finger That's why my sweatsuit's So tight So the sweatsuit

Doesn't touch The nipple already Y'all really gotta look At the YouTube And see this outfit Kaz wore This shit is crazy Yo Kaz is Man he done He do look like a Laffy T Y'all really got to look at the YouTube and see this outfit, Kaz. This shit is crazy.

Yo, Kaz is... Man, he done. You do look like a laughing... I had some good ones before. So you said I look sweet and delicious is what you're saying. That you want to put in your mouth. You look sweet for sure. You could put it in my mouth for a long time. Whoa.

Maybe you don't look like that. No, that's funny. It's off the rails. The number of times I've done that dance Unironically in college Yo motherfucker I used to fuck up A Laffy Taffy Back in college bro

Really I used to do the Fucking toss up And do Oh yeah Oh I got that one too Oh man That was the best time

You see you kids That wall shit Y'all didn't start that bro That started with fucking The Laffy Taffy The franchise boy That wall shit, y'all didn't start that, bro. That started with fucking... The Laffy Taffy. The Franchise Boy. Son.

Oh, God. My back. Bro. My neck. Yo, you got to try... You got to rub that cream on your back. Acupuncture, son. You really think acupuncture works? Son.

It worked for me. You don't think that that's their little trick? Yeah, but I went in there thinking that. To do what? Obviously, what they're trying to accomplish. Oh, it does release tension. Which is what? Huh?

What are they trying to accomplish? You know what they're trying to accomplish, bro. What are they trying to accomplish? What are they trying to accomplish? I don't know, yo. You got something? Nope. I thought I would by the time I I thought I would by the time

I saw it twice. I really thought I would have it. And then nothing came, dog. Oh, I have one good joke in New Orleans. You want to double up the site, bro? No, I gotta go. go Yeah we can double up So

What the fuck There's another one? Son Come on bro You know how we do Come on Come get this Alex

Fuck Yo we've been going For this Yeah we really have Come super get Second our saliva touched All of us have kissed Pretty much

That was it Imagine hearing Barney Tell you to come get it So You know what's crazy? You look gayer than Barney tell you to come get it You know what's crazy? He look gayer than Barney Facts bro Barney's arms too short to rape

That is true Unless he like tail raped you Like if Barney wrapped the tail around Yeah that'd be crazy You look crazy Like a barbie like wrap the tail around. Yeah, that'd be crazy. I mean, you look crazy. I mean, you look like you got that palsy, dog. He did look like he had that palsy.

Go back to that palsy, son. Cat's out here rocking the bells. You're rocking them bells, bro. Sound like a Jay-Z tour. Just imagine the tail around somebody. We got it. We got somebody. We got it. We got it. We got it.

Arms this little. Everybody high right now. There's definitely some TAC in this. Everybody high, yo. I mean, Kaz is literally dancing like a retard right now. He's doing the Michael J. Fox in a corner over there. How would they laugh each other? Wait, wait, you got to throw it up. Son, how would a T-Rex

Laffy Taffy just T-Rex that shit, dog? Give me the lighter first. Here you go. Son, you're so prissy about it. You look like Farnsworth Bentley in the laughing tabby. Yo, what happened to Farnsworth Bentley, yo?

AIDS. Oh, man. Wow. Wow. God damn. No, I fucks with Mr. Bentley, bro. We know you fucks with him. You gave him the AIDS. Yo, nah, bro. We know you fucked with him. You gave him the answer. Yo, nah, bro.

What? How else he die? I don't know. I know he had one fire song with like... I know he had 19 pairs of khakis. Yeah. That guy had a fucking wardrobe.

Umbrella's up the ass, bro. Oh, yeah. That guy had an umbrella like fucking Barry Poppins. Get the fuck out of here, yo. Look at that chicken attendant. He had that

don't stop dancing, don't stop, don't stop me. Ain't nobody listening to that gay ass song. That shit was fire. Had Andre 2000,

Common, Kanye. How long? Why you still counting like this? It's already you cut your arms out, dog. I thought I was

still Barney. Yo, I thought Jidenna was far as we're bent for the longest. Yo, that's Jidenna was far as we're bent with for the longest. Alpha male Fonzie. What was Jidenna's song about? I'm a classic, man.

He's Nigerian, though. He's Igbo. He what? He's Igbo Nigerian. He's not gang. He's not Yoruba? No, he's not Yoruba. He's Igbo.

Igbo's all right. Igbo's, they bodied out of there. I mean, they're a little bit more... You know, they fought a war. The Yoruba and the AUSA came together to fight a war to fuck the Igbos up. That's not what happened at all. It is. It is?

Oh, well, I'll be damned. Well... That's why there's Igbos outside of Nigeria. Mostly in, like, UK, right? Don't you hate when he knows shit about your people? No, in Africa. Other African countries. No. like UK, right? Don't you hate when he knows shit about your people? No, in Africa. Other African countries. No.

He could be right. Because the Yoruba and the AUSA. He remembers every fucking random thing you tell him. So the Yoruba and the AUSA, they were beefing first. But then they were like, yo, we gotta body these Igbos. We gotta get these Igbos out of here.

Why? Because they kind of bought their own thing. Now, the one thing about the Igb like, yo, we got to body these ebos. We got to get these ebos out of here. Why? These motherfuckers. Because they kind of bought their own thing. Now, the one thing about the ebos, though, they're food slaps. Someone said that to me. They got the best jollof? Nah, they don't have the best jollof. It's the same. Like, Nigerian's jollof rice is, like, pretty standard.

I've been on record as saying this. I'm like, Ghanaian jollof kind of slaps a little bit more. I think what they have Are these like Chicken skewers Right It's like a skewer festival They are I forget the name of it

But it's a big deal Holy fuck I hope my mom isn't listening She's listening Yeah She's already gonna be tight That we're We're smoking very early

I've been trying to put my mom On the CBD too You gotta go Yo Moms would love CBD I've been trying to tell my mom on the CBD, too. You gotta go. Yo, moms would love CBD. I've been trying to tell my mom, like, listen, like, I wouldn't do anything. My mom high would be the funniest shit ever. Now, CBD stands for circumcised black dick.

Is that what it stands for? Because that's what I think I've been smoking all fucking episode. Do you guys think that? What? Poor skinned dick. Circumcised black dick. you gotta learn how to smoke it cooler akash can you just try again but look cool yeah like just grab it just grab it no no no no no no no no no grab it by the filter grab it by the look cool look as if look as if you're trying to

look cool like yeah no no you're not in a commercial listen like grab it like chill like yeah oh shit oh shit suck that down hey there it is there the fuck it is and don't look so difficult in the face so difficult in the face what is that what is looking difficult in the face

honestly I think I know what you mean honestly no bullshit can you grab it with your toe fingers Huh? Honestly, no bullshit. Can you grab it with your toe fingers and try to smoke it? It would make me feel really happy. Nah, I don't have the dexterity you would think I have

with these things. You don't? You, I think, could. You got the hip flexors. Yeah, but my back is pulled because of Alex with his fucking voodoo doll. Did you talk about on a podcast

about sniffing your girl's butt? I didn't talk about that? No. Because I walked into the apartment and it smelled like shit. And I was like, you took a shit? And she was like, no. And I was like, let me sniff your butthole to make sure. So I put my nose up in there.

Like a little truffle pig. I went right up in there like this. Is there some truffle back there? And I got up deep up in that. Son, who does that shit? No. Why did the house smell like shit? What did it smell like?

Some shit. I wonder why. Probably dudes out there banging my girl, taking shits. Before I got home. But then I went and smelled that butthole like this. Like that. He's crazy. he's really great i got in there i got in there akash is that i thought i was imagining that i thought it was high dog holy fuck i don't know why it's floating that's something that we're all sitting it's like

an ash or something see a little black speckck? That's why I stopped looking at you for a bit and I was zoned out. Son, I thought I was in Madness. Yo, y'all dead ass high, yo? No, there was a little black speck that... Fuck. That spilled all over my... Yo. This shit is going off the rails, bro.

I'm like, what the fuck are y'all looking at, yo? That's really some flowers, bro. You gotta ask CBD more often. Y'all see him. Shout out to Radix Remedies. Only gang. Yo, real talk. Al, y'all hitting this?

Yeah. Can you come over because my back is broken, obviously. Doctor said I need to back you out of me. All right, so Akash, what is your greatest fear in life? So crazy.

What's your greatest fear? Yo, being buried alive, actually. Really? Yeah, I'm mad claustrophobic. Fucking pussy. Mad claustrophobic, yo. Oh, my gosh. Wait a minute.

Really? Mad claustrophobic. Wait, seriously? That's your biggest fear? Probably. I legit like for about half a second every time I'm on the elevator, my brain is like, what if the shit gets stuck? Am I going to die here?

Oh, shit. You really are. I'm legit. Yeah. That never crossed my mind. No, never. What crosses your mind in an elevator? If the elevator gets stuck, who are you going to blow?

Nah, the pee corner. You got to decide the pee corner. Ah, that's a good point. I don't think that's that difficult a decision. You got to pee. You pee in a corner, that's the pee corner. It's the first person to pee. Depends on how many people are in there.

You took up one of the sleeping corners and shit like that. I would try to pee into the door so a little would go down the thing. Yeah, you pee right on the center crack. What if you miss it? It just hits you right back like it. I think that's a good point. That's a good point.

I didn't consider it. You got a point at the bottom of the crack. You know what I would do? I'd pee between my legs like a tranny. But I'd tuck my dick in between my legs and pee down through my balls. But it's still on the floor. I don't understand. You just pissed all over your head. Why would you pee on yourself? I don't know what I was thinking. I don't understand. You just pissed all over your head.

Why would you pee on yourself? I don't know what I was thinking. I don't know what I was thinking right there. That was the CBD. That was the CBD. Sorry, guys. I didn't know. We didn't take the focus ones.

I'll tell you that much. No, damn sure not. No, I didn't get that neuro... Anyway. How do we get into this? So claustrophobia, your biggest fear. Yeah, what's yours? My biggest fear?

Yeah. Oh. Your sexuality? No,rophobia, your biggest fear. Yeah. What's yours? My biggest fear? Yeah. Oh, your sexuality. Um, no, you know what my biggest fear is, is, uh, and I don't even want to say it because it'd be so fucked up, but, um, maybe losing my hearing. Really? Because that's oddly specific. Then you can't perform you know it's like your voice goes

it starts to sound all retardy but also it's true it does right right you've heard them is he wrong he's not wrong

can you pass me my my hearing aid you know what I mean it's a little fucked up now hey what creed movie are they going to get to where the bitch starts sounding like that?

Yo, I cannot wait. Creed 10, Tessa Thompson going to start. Queed. They just call it Queed? A powerful Queed. Her music just gets getting worse and worse, and he's got to lie to her about how good it is anyway what was I saying though

your biggest fear is losing your hearing oh cause then if you perform you can't hear the reaction it would be heartbreaking so I'd lose the thing I love most comedy that would be probably my So I'd lose the thing I love most, comedy. That would be probably my biggest fear. Or being like injured so badly

in something like some sort of crash where like you just can't have a normal life but you're still alive. That would be tragic. Oh yeah. If I'm paralyzed

or quadriplegic take me out. You want out? Yeah, I want out. You want to die, die. Sam, take me out. What's your biggest want out you want die die same take me out but what's your biggest fear Alex besides white women

and black women fuck I'm so high fuck up the joke fuck yo bitch I had a lot to lose I am a bitch yo that is messed up

whatever yo I twat I twat my best the playoffs are gonna be really exciting bro like any any one of the like slow painful deaths

So like Cancer Fire Thirst Dying of thirst I thought about suffocating Like being in the water Drowning

I heard drowning is supposed to be euphoric I heard Really? I don. What the fuck? Really? I mean, I don't see it. Because you're floating a little? I don't know. I almost drowned as a kid.

Yeah? Yeah, my brother saved my life. What happened? One of my uncles was watching me. Guy wasn't doing shit, clearly. And I was playing on a pool. I was three years old. And I was on the step.

And nobody was watching me. And I just fell into the five-foot water or whatever. And I'm legit three years old. I remember this. I remember looking around, not understanding what was happening. I could see a leaf in the water or whatever. And I'm legit three years old. I remember this. I remember looking around, not understanding what was happening. I could see like a leaf in the water or whatever. I'm down there for a little while. And then my brother's friend is like,

yo, wasn't your brother over there down the other end of the pool? And then they came and got me. And then my uncle was just like, he was drowned? He's a motherfucker. In retrospect, I'm just like,

the fuck are you doing, yo? You have one job. That's your own diet. Fuck, dude. I have a worse story. i was on a family vacation you have to get that back i feel you you get that um so i'm on a family vacation and shit yeah um

it's a couple of my cousins there a few of them are older than me so the pool was one of those it goes from three feet to six feet or some shit like that so we were playing a game where you would run from the deep end and jump and make it to the shallow end and i was the shortest and the youngest at the time so when it was my turn i did it i land right in five feet start drowning instantly so at the pool at the pool as my aunt my back and like three of my cousins there yeah they're looking at me laughing and this old white lady jumps in the pool and saves my life. That's where it started. Oh, that's where it started.

It all makes sense now, doesn't it? Wow. You want these white bitches to save you, bro. Save me. Save you from your black-ass aunt. Dude, that's fucking crazy, man. But it was a good experience right after that same trip I learned to swim. Of course it was a good experience Right after that That same trip I learned to swim Of course it was a good experience

Of course you did son You had to You've been chasing that same White woman high your whole life You had to learn how to swim To fuck these white women Guys They don't put up with that shit

More than once They'd be at the beach Bro How long is this episode yo? I feel like we started this shit Last week You got two hours already? Son this shit flew by.

Y'all want to take our tits out and rub it? No, guys, please no. Please no. I really want to talk. Yo. I thought we were bonding. All right.

Let's be honest, Patreon. This ain't a Patreon episode, it's a regular episode. This is Monday night, bro. It's a regular episode. You should be a Patreon be a patreon real talky yo yo listen listen listen that radix goes i ain't gonna front that goes mad hungry we got sushi that is on decky i cannot wait to eat this fucking sushi okay thank? Thank y'all for listening. You know what we're going to do very soon

by the way? We're going to give you a tour of the new studio. Show Studios is officially going to get the whole tour. So we're going to drop that soon. Obviously Added a 4th show in Los Angeles. Go get that. And there's some tickets left for the Alabama show this Sunday. Theandrewshows.com for all the other

tickets. Akash, what you got for them? I am in Sacramento at the Punchline January 29th. We had a show in Tacoma on the 28th, but we moved it because I would have had to miss an extra episode of the podcast and fuck that. So we're going to figure out a new date for that. But Punchline on the 20th. 30th, 31st

and February 1st we're at Rooster Teeth Feathers in San Jose. February 6th we're in Nashville, Tennessee at Zany's. February 8th we're at Rooster Teeth Feathers in San Jose. February 6th we're in Nashville, Tennessee at Zany's. February 8th we're at the Laughing Skull in Atlanta.

March 12th through 14th we're at the Comedy Nest in Montreal. I'm so fucking hyped to go to Canada. Y'all better come through, man. I better see Matt Desis. Whoever you got in Toronto,

y'all better come through. Toronto? You have Toronto? Toronto not yet. I said Toronto. I'm in Montreal. Montreal still. Montreal, we got some love up there, yet. I said Toronto. I'm in Montreal. Montreal still.

Montreal we got some love up there man. Yo I'm excited. Go spread some love to our country. Last date the 27th. March 27th. The Den in Chicago. Chi-town come the fuck

Yo Chi-town come out man. I really want you to do Toronto. We're going to work on that. Me too yo. I feel like I get love out there. It's a great city.

I think you would. Fantastic city. I think you'd do really well out there. Absolutely. That's the city I get hit up the most when you come into my city is Toronto by far the most. It's a very worldly. I think you would. Fantastic city. I think you'd do really well out there. Absolutely. That's the city I get hit up the most when you come into my city

is Toronto by far the most. It's a very worldly city. Toronto shows love. Love it. Cass, what are you doing besides returning that outfit? I rubbed my dick in it a few times. I'll be in Aspen this week

with doing the X Games. Oh, shit. Can you Cal Mesa Kayla, yo? Cal Mesa Kayla. Cal Mesa Kayla, I'm high. It's going. Can you count Masekela, yo? Can you count Masekela? I'm high. It's going to be lit.

And then after that, Saturday, I'm hosting a stream of Cricket Wireless for the Royal Rumble for the New Day, which should be tight. And wait, what? I said what?

You said cricket. My ears parked up. I said, who's playing cricket? Oh, my bad. Yeah, nah. So Aspen this weekend and Houston. It's going gonna be lit

if you guys are out there or see me you know what to do just throw it out and you know show love Andrew yo man

y'all know where to get theandrewshows.com shout out to Radix man I hope some of y'all I don't know man we love y'all man peace

it's play good too We love y'all man Peace It's Playgood 2