Andy Frasco's World Saving Podcast - EP 194: Matisyahu

Episode Date: October 25, 2022

On a very special episode of the WSP, Andy & Nick discuss musician's internet personas. What drives your social media intentions: Is it pessimism or honesty, and what's the line between honoring your truth vs keeping it REAL?? Also: sex & drugs & rock & roll! And on the Interview Hour we got the legend himself, Matisyahu! Andy and he talk tribe, music, and all the ups & downs of this beautiful mess we call LIFE. Shawn sings a song about staying safe on the road. New album is done AND we got a tour coming up with our buddies, Little Stranger?? Don't forget to catch the band on the road andyfrasco.com/tour Follow us on Instagram @worldsavingpodcast For more information on Andy Frasco, the band and/or the blog, go to: AndyFrasco.com Check out Andy Frasco & The U.N. (Feat Little Stranger)'s new song, "Oh, What A Life" on iTunes, Spotify  Welcome to his world: matisyahuworld.com Produced by Andy Frasco Joe Angelhow Chris Lorentz Audio mix by Chris Lorentz Featuring: Shawn Eckels Arno Bakker

All right, boys, what do you got for me? Here he goes again on his own Driving down the fucking highway on his phone Been drifting into lanes and parking zones Frasco's made up his mind Frasco's made up his mind He's gambling with our lives Here he goes again on his own Driving down the fucking highway on his phone

It's the longest tour I've ever fucking known Frasco's made up his mind Gonna answer every email while he drives So here he goes again Here he goes again Here it goes again Here it goes Get off your fucking phone That was it. Let's start the show.

And we're back. Andy Frasco's World's Same Podcast. I'm Andy Frasco's World Saving Podcast I'm Andy Frasco How's our heads? How's our minds? Are you above criticism? Because you made something? Right away, Nick!

I don't know We were just talking about it I know It's fun to get right into it Oh, man How we doing? Right away, Nick? I don't know. We were just talking about it. I know. It's fun to get right into it. Oh, man. How are we doing? I'm pretty good.

I'm about to leave on tour. I know. Are you going to miss me? Yeah. When are you going to be back? First time back, I'll be back in like three weeks. Oh. We'll can some openings so you have them.

Yeah. Or maybe we'll just fly you in for some stuff. That seems like a huge waste of money, but okay. If it's your money, fuck it. I don't know. Fuck it. I waste money all the time.

Might as well spend another three, $400. You waste money on way dumber stuff than having me come talk to you. You yelled at me because I bought a Balenciaga wallet. What the fuck is wrong with you? I don't know. When I'm sad, I buy things.

I don't like your... You don't do that? No. When you're like... I was too poor growing up. I have like a weird thing with money. Have you ever seen me waste money on anything? My mom taught me when you're sad,

buy something. Ask your dad about that. I bought this. Yeah, my dad's pissed. Whatever. It's your money. You're single. It's not hurting anybody, but it's fun to make fun of you for buying a Balenciaga wallet. Like what a corny thing. I bought an expensive thing to uphold my money in money.

I don't know how much probably wasn't that much, but Balenciaga shit is expensive. $200. That must've been a discount or something. It was. I bought it at duty-free. Also, because their shoes are like $1,500. They're the ugliest shit I've ever seen in my life. They're like space

shoes. Yeah, they look so dumb. It's like, are you just trying to... I swear to God, some of these companies are like, let's see when we get these dumb motherfuckers to spend money on next. And they're just like, ha ha, look at that. Jordan does that too. Nike Jordan. To be fair, the wallet doesn't look ridiculous. It just says Balenciaga on next. And they're just like, ha ha, look at that. Jordan does that too. Nike Jordan. To be fair,

the wallet doesn't look ridiculous. It just says Balenciaga on it. And I'm not a fan of that either. I don't like stuff where you buy something and then the company's brand name is on it. Yeah.

Like, why the fuck am I paying you to advertise your shit? It's a good grift by them though. I got to, like, remember Abercrombie and Fitch? Like, every shirt they have is just like, Abercrombie and Fitch like every shirt they have is just Abercrombie it's like okay so you pay someone $60 for a button down and then they're

advertising your company too it's a pretty good business model yeah anyway what a stupid thing you bought I know you guys should see his shoe collection for a guy that doesn't wear shoes you sure have thousands of dollars in shoes I'm not hating on that because that could actually have sure have thousands of dollars in shoes. Hey, don't, I don't want to get my shit stolen. I'm not hating on that because that could actually have, you could sell those.

I don't want to sell them. But you could. Yeah. Like, like they're not going to like lose money or whatever. Oh, but whatever. You bought a wallet. It gives a shit. I mean, we could judge every, we could judge everything else in our lives, but we can't

judge musicians. I know we were talking about that before. That's why I made that joke. So like there's this thing right now where everybody hates the music industry or whatever, but what about the musicians? They're really getting a pass. The musicians are getting a pass. Yeah.

Just because the music industry is bad doesn't make every musician good. We're not all good people. No, we can't. I just had a conversation about this. I can't go through this. We need to stay optimistic. I'm optimistic. There's plenty of great musicians out there making great music.

There's also tons of bad musicians making bad music who are above... My thing is just like, why are people not allowed to criticize musicians anymore unless they're just a fan? Why am I not allowed to be like, yo, that sucks. That's not good. They're out of tune. They're not on... You know, their time is bad. If you're like another musician, it makes you feel like you're a hater, but I'm not a hater. I'm just an objective observer of things. I'm not saying they should not be successful. Like if 3,000 people want to spend money and go see it, that's fine too. I don't care. Right. But that doesn't make it

objectively good. And it's not even that. It's that like a lot of people think that like you're not allowed to criticize music at all because, or whatever art, because it's like art or I don't know. I think it's just because of the boomers race. That's bad. Boomers race.

It's like the particip, it comes out of the participation trophy sort of thing, you know? What do you mean? Well, you know how boomers are always bitching about millennials or, or Gen Z or whatever, having their participation trophy thing, which is also a bullshit argument, What do you mean? Well, you know how boomers are always bitching about millennials or Gen Z or whatever,

having their participation trophy thing? Which is also a bullshit argument because they raised us to be that way. So why are you mad at the way we are? You raised us. That's like if you hit your dog every day and then you get mad at him when he bites someone. Well, you hit the dog every day. So I just think that the same thing is existing in music right now.

It's really bad in the jam band scene where like, if you make fun of a band, you're like a bad person, but why can't we just make fun of shit and have fun and just like call stuff dumb if it's dumb? I don't, I don't get it because people are too sensitive. That's why they're artists.

That's what I'm saying. But you, if you're an artist and you stand by your shit, you shouldn't be sensitive about it. You should just take any criticism with a grain of salt. Right. If you believe in your shit, who cares? But also, people are still allowed

to criticize it. I don't know. I got reprimanded about being so pessimistic. I know. Hold on. My headphone thing came out. I'm like, I'm not pessimistic. I'm just being honest. It makes me not want to be honest.

Isn't that the point of life is to be honest with how you feel i mean i would say that i like in that part of journalism is to be honest about how you feel yeah technically this is a journalism i know that technically we're journalists right now doing this podcast or something like that media whatever but like so we're supposed to just lie and say everything's good? Who the hell's going to want to listen to a podcast where you're like, he's good. I like him. I also like him. He is also good. And that is also good. Wow. Great content, guys. You like everything. Cool.

Everything's equally good. That can't be that way, can it? No, but why? But this is the problem with what social media did to our brains. It's like we are forced just to make everything be good. Yeah. It's insane.

It's insane. And everything... And no wonder why there's more mental health issues than ever before. Because everyone is relying on this fake happiness they see on fucking social media. Yeah. And comparing themselves to... And comparing themselves to that. The best version of someone's fake life.

No one's real on Instagram. Maybe you a little bit, but like... Yeah. Most people are just lying. You know what I mean? We're all a bunch of fucking liars. So stop judging yourself against someone else's lies. Also, I have a...

Right? We're on fire today. I think other... I think that like social media is going to be like... In 20 years, like... It's going to be looked at like smoking cigarettes or something. Really? I really think it's not. You can already...

I feel like... I don't know. I'm not around kids that much. But... Well, I guess that's a good thing. But I'm not around kids that much, so I don't really know. But it seems like they're not being as corny online

as the 35-year-olds. They're not. I mean... No, we don't need to romance. We've been over this. We don't need to romanticize every single thing in our life. Yeah. That actually makes things worse.

I think. Yeah. And, uh, you know, when, when I get, I get,

I get shit on. Cause I'm like honest about my, uh, my alcoholism. Yeah. Like, Oh, then just stop fucking drink.

I'm, it's not about how I'm having a hard day. Cause the alcoholism, I'm having a hard day because of the alcoholism I'm having a hard day because life is hard I'm trying to express that life is fucking hard yes and you know what that goes in the music industry thing too the music industry is fucking hard and if you're not making it that's

fine but don't lie and say you are and don't lie I mean just because you're working hard I'm not talking about you but like there's a lot of people who think just because they work hard, they deserve something. That's cool if you work at like GMC or some corporation

where there's a corporate ladder and there's like a defined set of things you need to do to climb it. But guess what? This industry doesn't work like that. There's like the best saxophone player in the world is probably some guy in his garage that's like no one's heard of.

You know what I mean? That just sheds 14 hours a day and has no personality or something. You know what I'm saying? You're not guaranteed anything just because you tried. You know what I mean? And I know your parents told you that or whatever, but it's not true. I gotta get that

out of my head. It's like you should be thankful that you're even doing this for a living. I mean, throughout history, I know it's like now, it's like everybody has a cool job for some reason all of a sudden after the pandemic and they're all working from home on their computer but like you know throughout history you were lucky if you even had income or like if you weren't dead at 35 you know what i'm saying like so i whenever i get down about whatever the music industry i just think oh yeah my ancestors had to fight in a civil war or like

fucking uh you know what I'm saying? I have friends that have died in Iraq because they got sent there, you know, or whatever. Talked about modest Yahoo about this. Like his family was in the Holocaust. Exactly. It's a reflection of how good of a world we live in compared to our ancestors.

Like, I don't think like the pioneers had depression. They were too busy trying to survive. Yeah. Do you think the Donner party got depression? I don't know, like, the pioneers had depression. They were too busy trying to eat. Survive. Yeah. Do you think the Donner Party got depression? I don't know. Fuck it.

Yeah. You have tons of things that nobody in history had at your age. So maybe it's cool that you're depressed because it means your life is so good that you have the ability to become depressed about it. Yeah. We forget. We take income. I think we've... Back to the social media thing.

I think we've taken for granted... Sad... Like, we think we taken for granted sad, like we, not taken for granted, we didn't realize that sadness is part of life too. Yeah. It's fun to feel sad sometimes. I don't know if it's fun. It feels good. I mean, like, it's good to have a range of emotions. Sick fuck. No, you can like, I don't know. It's important.

I don't know, but it's fun to feel sad. Well, it's your body. A little bit. I am fucking weird. It's important. I don't know, but it's fun to feel sad. Well, it's your body. A little bit. I am fucking weird about it. It's like, hello. Hello, sadness. Welcome. Doors open, sadness. But emotions are kind of your way of your mind and your body

or your mind communicating with you to tell you you need to do some different shit. Yeah. I don't know. You know what doesn't make me sad? Dialed in fucking gummies. Dialed in gummies. Shout out to dialed in gummies. Oh, man. I haven't talked to Keith in a while. I saw him yesterday. He had COVID for a little bit.

Is he okay? He's still liking what we're doing? He's all better. Yeah, he's liking it. Cool. But yeah, he's been laying low. He had the vid. Oh, no. He's all better. He didn't get it that bad. He's not a real zoo. I'm just kidding. Jesus, you're on fire. No, that's a joke. He didn't get it that bad. He's not a real disease. He's all fake. I'm just kidding. Jesus, you're on fire.

No, that's a joke. Everything else I said was a standby. That was a joke. Okay. COVID does exist. Yeah. Dotting gummies. Dotting gummies.

I've been, before we talked about dotting gummies, ever since we interviewed that e-thing guy, I've been smoking e-vaping. Oh, yeah, because he told you that vaping is better for you than cigarettes. I haven't smoked as many cigarettes. I believe him because he knows everything about drugs. So shout out to Ethan for giving me on the e-vaping. He didn't lie to us. He's a lawyer.

Doubt and gummies. Want to do the pitch? Sure. Doubt and gummies. I re-upped last... Like I said, I saw Keith. He gave you some? I need some.

Oh, I can grab you some maybe. I thought you had a bunch. Anyway, so they're great for you. First of all, they fix all your problems immediately the second you take them. $500 will be put in your bank account by an unknown source. No, I'm just kidding. They're homogenous, which means the THC is equal

across the whole thing. They're solventless, which means there's not a bunch of bullshit in them. They taste better than any other gummy. They get you high as hell. I like to eat three to four 10 milligrams every night and watch a movie and go to bed or write a trivia show. That's what I did last night. I got super high and wrote my whole trivia show.

I heard that's killing. It's doing well, actually. People are good. They're smarter than I thought. I don't know. Go buy them. They're in every dispensary now, pretty much. If They're in every Dispensary now pretty much Yeah so go out there If you're in the Colorado area Go buy some dialed in gummies

They're the best We're not just blowing Smoke up your ass And they're like a local company It's not some big corporation Shove in Mom, Pa Mom, Pa and Keith Portman

And Keith Portman Shout out to Keith Keith He's a legend man I love I love Keith Yeah So grab yourself some dialed in gummies

Okay is this Are we being too pessimistic? I don't think we're being pessimistic at all. No? That's the thing. That's the problem. It's like people think this is... That's just like a sensitivity thing. I mean, I'm not trying to... I'm not like mad at the

world here. I'm just saying like chill out a little bit, everybody. You're not so important. Your songs are just songs. It wouldn't affect anything. Music's important. No, that's what I'm saying. It is important, but like, just relax about it a little bit. You know what I mean? I know.

Maybe it's just life and death to that 10% of people that, you know, we're in such a niche. Yeah, exactly. I also like, you know, you could say the same thing about fucking college sports fans. 100%. 100%. Or basketball teams. This is not a music thing. This also like, you know, you could say the same thing about fucking college sports fans. 100%. 100%.

Or basketball teams. This is not a music thing. This is like a life thing. I'm just sort of talking about music. People get like really sad. Like I've watched like the barstool people like bet. Oh my God, that shit is insane. Who's that big guy that loves the Mets?

Oh, I forgot. But he can. Frank the Tank maybe? He's like so, he just gets so aggressive and sad when the Mets lose. Yeah, maybe he needs other stuff going on in his life, too, or something. Well, he gets paid to do that.

Yeah, I know. I'm just kidding. Do the Lakers do that to you still? Not anymore. That's what's kind of sad. I don't really care as much. You're getting to be in your 30s, and it's not a thing. The veil has been lifted on these people.

Yeah, they're just people. I even turned off the game. I would have too if I was a Lakers fan. I mean, they're playing like shit, but it wasn't even that. I'm just like, I used to be so attached. Yeah.

So attached. I watched the whole game. I watched both games. Yeah. Yeah, their benches got awful and they have no shooting as usual. I don't understand what Rob Blinka's doing. And they just gave him an extension. I don't know.

I don't want to talk about it. They should just trade AD or something. I don't know. Just blow up the team and just get some picks and try to get the French kid. Yeah, fuck it. Fuck it. Anyway, we have Modest Yahoo on the show.

Hell yeah. This was a great conversation. See, he'll be a lot more optimistic. His life was very hard. Yeah. And he still figured out a way to make it all work. He grew up sort of like in the Orthodox Jewish community, right? Or something.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. He lived in New York. Oregon. He was kind of like a troublemaker. And he had to go to rehab. Oh, yeah. And then he had to go to Oregon. Yeah.

That'll straighten you out going to Oregon. I never want to go here again. He was in Bend in the 90s when Bend wasn't hip yet. Yeah, it was probably just like... So it was in the middle of nowhere. Lumberjack guys. Yeah. And he was like, what the fuck?

Yeah, weird. But he got better, so shout out to him. Now it's like full Collins. All right, let's end this show with a little bit of optimism. I'm optimistic, actually. Just saying,

you guys need to just relax about your shit, man. Just like... We're talking about us. Be nice to yourself. Yeah, be nice to yourself. Don't need to... You don't need to judge yourself

over everyone else. Yeah. It's life. We need to start focusing. You don't need to judge yourself over everyone else. Yeah. It's life. If you don't like a band, you're allowed to criticize them. If you do like a band, don't get so emotional when people criticize them. That's it. That's all I'm saying. Yeah.

Or your sports teams. Or your sports teams or whoever. Or your girlfriend or boyfriend. Well, that's a little different, but yeah. How dare you. Alright. I don't know. Well, that's a little different, but yeah. How dare you? Alright. Well, have a great day. You should have a great day.

My fucking trailer got stolen. Is it empty? Yeah. No, there was some shit in it. But they just like... They just took it out of my fucking driveway. Pretty easy to steal a trailer, because it wasn't on anything, was it? No, and it was like light, because there was only a couple keyboards and shit.

What a stupid... We had the locks on there. Oh, wow. Well, they can... People know what they're doing. I didn't... Just one thing. What a stupid trailer to steal.

It has like your... Yeah, it says, follow your dreams and Andy Frasco on it. I'm like, what the fuck? So if you're in the Denver area and you see my trailer... It's tan with red writing, right? It's tan with red writing that says, never give up. If you see somebody driving around a stolen trailer

that says, never give up, that's Andy's. That's mine, so please report it. He's already got the insurance claim going. Let's not get more paperwork. Just flip that guy off. Tell him he's a fucking asshole for stealing my trailer. Okay, we're done. We got to get out of here.

Bo's got to go buy us a new trailer for $8,000. God damn it. $8,000. I can't believe a trailer costs $8,000. I can. Actually, no. They should be like $5,000, I feel like. It's like a Camry.

Yeah, you're right. You're right. It's like a used Camry. What the fuck? And it was a 2011. It's a used trailer? Yes. Oh, I didn't know Yes, but it's a double axle. It's like we got to get a big boy trailer now.

Double axle so it handles better or whatever? Just so we could carry the weight. And we're like bringing more merch. We're selling a shit ton of merch. And Floyd rides back there. And Floyd rides in the back. Okay, let me just promote some shows before I go. Okay, guys.

Tour started. You've already had the first weekend, but we're playing Springfield, Missouri on Wednesday. We need the tickets. Beautiful town. Sell some tickets, baby. Charlottesville, popping. That show's popping.

I'm stoked on that. On the 28th, Asheville, North Carolina. Don't bring your tiki torches. Asheville, North Carolina on Don't bring your tiki torches. Asheville, North Carolina on the 29th. Also a big turnout with the cult leader, William Strings in town. I'm playing after.

We had a really good show last year on tour. Yeah, I'm pretty impressed of how many tickets we've sold. Are you playing with William playing that weekend? Salva Station. And then Columbus, Ohio on the 30th for Halloween. Then the next weekend, we're in

Washington, D.C. on the 2nd. Boston, Massachusetts. Don't be trying to fucking haggle me on the fucking Celtics thing, okay? We know you're a better team. Just move on. Not even close. Not even close. I mean, fucking fine. Throw your Celtics jerseys on like you always do.

But don't... I mean, I'm very vulnerable right now. The Lakers suck. Don't smear it in my face. And the Celtics could fall apart at any moment. They will. They have like a 34-year-old coach. Yeah.

Yeah, they will. They will. But I'm not going to talk about that. Then it's the 4th, we're in Philadelphia. And the 5th, we're in Brooklyn. And then I have four days off in New York. I can't wait. What are you going to do? What are you doing? We rented an Airbnb, and I'm, we're in Brooklyn. And then I have four days off in New York. I can't wait. What are you going to do?

What are you doing? We rented an Airbnb, and I'm just going to eat food. We got food there, yeah. Anyway, let's try the ending again. We're going to have a great week. We're going to have a great week. It's going to be good. Leaving the part where you say, let's try the ending again.

Just stay happy. I'm ready to watch your tour. For my phone. I remember that last year. That was so fun. I'm bummed you your tour. For my phone. I remember that last year. That was so fun. I'm bummed you're not coming. No, it's cool. Little Stranger seems cool, though.

They're cool as fuck. Yeah, I love them. All right, guys. I love you. You do need me for therapy, though. I do. I needed that. Thank you.

If you ever need a guy to not talk to you for six days, I'm your man. I know. All right, guys. Have a great day. Are you going to motivate them? I mean, I need motivation. Why don't you give me motivation? You're on tour.

You don't need motivation. You have to do it. You're already in it. You're in a van. You're going to the place. You're being driven. You're driving probably. You're on your phone.

Just keep going, buddy. All right. Thanks, bud. Love you. Bye. You're aging fine. buddy. All right. Thanks, bud. Love you. Bye. You're aging fine. All right. Next up on the interview hour, we have rapper, songwriter,

Modest Yahoo. Oh man. I love this interview. Hey, Chris, play some Modest Yahoo. He's got a great story. This is very inspiring. He's dealt with a lot in his life. And now that he's still traveling, he's got his kids with him and his family touring with him. It's just, you're going to love this interview. So, ladies and gentlemen, next up on the interview hour, please welcome Madis Yahu. Ihr mades Jahr. Be my golden sunshine It's raining in your mind So push them clouds aside Forever by my side

You're my golden sunshine Wow. Modest. What's up, Andy? How you doing? I'm good, man. This has been a long time coming. Awesome, yeah. Just two Jews having conversation.

Let's fucking go, dude. Let's go, let's go. Doing what we do best. I know, I tell you what. I know. Yo, so I'm so curious about you. First, I want to go over some kind of topics. As a Jewish man, as representing the tribe,

pretty hardcore in your earlier years, and still probably, what do you think about the anti-Semitism in America right now? I guess it's a pretty scary thing, you know, because for the Jews, we, you know, what year were you born? I'm born in 79. 79, 88. Okay.

88, yeah. I'm a baby, yeah. But basically, you know, whatever, you know, our entire generation since, you know, since the Holocaust has not really experienced like real antisemitism. Right. You know, we've had our brushes with it. I'm sure Jews who've grown up in places where there aren't a lot of other Jews or whatever

have felt little things here and there. I certainly felt it when I started wearing a yarmulke and I started representing in that way a little bit here and there, but not anything compared to what the generations of Jews that came before us went through. And so I think that we've been kind of like, we know all these stories, we've heard of all these things that happened,

but everyone that's in our generation is like, what are you talking about? The Jews have it the easiest. They have it the best. And even for us, I think we haven't really fully understood that and um i think that um unfortunately it's like the way it works it's like a time thing it's like every certain amount of years basically the jews get kicked in the ass

pretty hard so you know if that was all it was i think we got off kind of easy but but like if it's if it's if it's a um if it's something that's gonna pick up you know what i mean if it's something that's going to pick up, you know what I mean? Then it's kind of like brace yourself because this is probably coming. And it's something that while we don't know, we might not have dealt with it in our lives. It's in our DNA to know how to deal with it. You know what I mean? So it's more like brace for impact and get together. And that's unfortunately like probably the only thing that has kept Jews

from fighting is when everyone else comes at us. Right. And then we're forced to have to kind of unite. Yeah. So there's always something good

that can come out of it, you know? Yeah, I agree. It's like, what kind of racist stuff are you going when you're doing, when you're rocking the yarmulke

and the yarmulkes and like, you know, did you ever have anything too bad or was it your fans that came out to shows it wasn't too bad but sometimes like on the subway or whatever i would just get the a look of hatred that it was a new look to me that i hadn't felt before you

know what i mean like a look of you know people there's always people that were irritated by me for some reason with dreadlocks or whatever it was you know being loud or being in sandals in february or whatever it was i got looks, or being loud or being in sandals in February or whatever it was, I got looks. But then when I started wearing the yarmulke from time to time, you would get, I would get a certain type of look that was like fire eyes.

Really? That was like, okay, that's a Nazi or some shit. Yeah. You know what I mean? Yeah, and especially, where'd you grow up? White Plains? I grew up, yeah, Westchester County. So a lot of Jews around, but yeah.

Yeah, but this was more when I put the yarmulke on, I was in the city. I was living in Manhattan. I was in school, in the new school. Oh, you went to new school. So in the beginning years of your career, what inspired you to be a musician? Who was it? Your mom, dad? Who was it?

My parents listened to great music. My parents are deadheads, actually. That's what I heard about you. You're like fish, and you love fish. Yeah, I grew up listening to like classic rock in the house. But then a lot of just like Tracy Chapman, Ricky Lee Jones, a lot of good singer-songwriters, Paul Simon and all that stuff. So I just had, I just, I remember growing up with music being like a real happy thing.

Like something that came, was was on it was playing sunday mornings when you came downstairs and or whatever so um but no they're not musicians so i just got into it um i didn't know what instrument i wasn't really like disciplined to learn an instrument yeah same but i would i love to sing and um i started writing poetry and I grew up in the 90s in New York, basically. So hip hop was a big influence and everyone in my circle of friends was freestyling and no one really knew how to beatbox and I got really good at beatboxing really quickly.

And I was like, oh, that's my bag. I'm really good at that. And I started to understand rhythm and harmony and melody and timing and pocket. All of those things just from... Who taught you? Just picked it up. Just picked it up.

Yeah. And just how you could drop out when someone's rapping and come back. Or if you add a bass line to it, how that affects the rapper. And so I started out as sort of like a drummer per se or like a, you know, not a front man in music. And who were you backing up? Mainly my friend Dan Eisenberg. This dude, Stanley Ipkiss. He's on all my records.

Tell me about him. How'd you guys hook up? He's just a nice freestyler from White Plains, a year older than me, a really cool kid. And I just, you know, in the cyphers and stuff, I would just beatbox for him mainly. That was the very, very first. How old were you?

16. 16. So you were going to gigs. How old were you? 16. 16. So you were going to gigs in the city at 16? Yes. I saw, I went with Dan actually to a place that was called Tramps and we saw the roots back in common

and I saw Razel beatbox with this dude, Kenny Muhammad, do like a duo beatbox there. There was, I don't know, 400, 500 people in the room. That changed my life forever. What did you see in that that made your life change? It was just hype.

It was like, you know, that was hip hop, you know? And then seeing it being done live by live musicians, you know, that was also very cool for me, having come from the fish and from the whole thing in the live world, seeing it being done live. Were you like an acid head in high school? Did you take a lot of acid, watch fish? What was your vibe? You're like a hippie or what?

Yeah, I was kind of a hippie. I was kind of a strange bird a little bit because I was a preppy kid growing up. And then I played ice hockey. And I was friends with a lot of people and then i started smoking weed and i became like heavy stoner like i started growing dreadlocks and you know listening to bob marley only and um that became kind of like my religion or whatever right and you know i became my thing so um that's how i kind of got into reggae music and then, um, fish. So yeah, I heard some fish.

I went to see fish. I had gone to Israel when I was 16 and came back and met my best friend in Boston and we went to Worcester mass and we saw fish and it was new year's run maybe. Or I think, yeah, I think it was new year's 90 must've been like 95, maybe 94, something like that. I took acid for the first time. That was when Trey was all on heroin and shit. Was he on heroin then? I don't think he was on heroin yet. Oh, really?

I think that came a little bit later, although he might have been. But yeah, I took acid for the first time. I was 16, and that was just the game changer. What happened? Give me, what do 16 and that was just the game changer. What happened? Give me, what do you remember? It just blew my mind. I just remember just the feeling, the feelings of the whole entire world being like inside out,

seeing everything from within. And then I remember seeing kids my age that were just doing that. They were just like running around the country and they weren't in school and there were no parents. And I was like, what the fuck? That's what I'm doing. So that's what I did. I dropped out. You dropped out of high school?

Yeah. Okay. So what were your parents like? Were you a rebel? Yeah, me. I didn't get along with my parents at the time. We're fighting a lot. What were you guys fighting about?

Like what type of conflicts? and um where were you guys fighting about like what type of conflicts um i guess it was about mainly about uh you know they wanted me to kind of like be a certain way and you know be a little more clean cut and and um you know not do drugs yeah so when did you so when did you start doing drugs 16 seems young were you doing like drinking at like 12 or like 13? I mean, I think I smoked weed like 14. I started smoking weed and cigarettes and I never really was a drinker. And then I took mushrooms, you know, and acid for the first times when I was like maybe 15, 16. Holy shit. And then when I was 17, I was on tour taking LSD like every day.

You know, going to fish shows and like barefoot in the lot, like. What the fuck? Puffing down nitrous tanks and shit. Okay, so. Passing out in fish lot, like selling grilled cheese sandwiches. Let's fucking go. I did not know this. Okay, so.

Were you not a good, you didn't like school? No, I didn't love school at all. So, did you feel like you didn't have any friends? What was your vibe in school? Well, I just didn't love learning at that time i didn't love and i i mean i you know eventually i like ended up going to yeshiva and studying like 14 hours a day for years and learning became like a huge part of my whole everything you know studying but when i was a teenager it just seemed completely irrelevant to me and I was always the type of person I guess I was emotional you know what I mean so it was hard for me to just kind of like detach from my emotion and sit in class and I always just felt like there

was something going on like inside some kind of inner kind of turmoil I was out of place I didn't know what what exactly what it was that I wanted to do or where I should be. I had some friends, but I loved, actually, my love was ice hockey. And I got tossed from the team for having the reputation of being a pothead. Oh, that fucked you up? Yeah. When that happened, I was like, all right. And I was starting to really listen to music a lot then.

I was like, fuck this. And I just starting to really listen to music a lot then. Yeah. I was like, fuck this. And I just like had a drum set set up in the attic. And I had like a PA with like delays on it and with a microphone. And I would just chant and drum like, you know, in the attic and get high and listen to music. And listen to all the artists that like really like basically influenced my whole way of singing. Like it was like Sizzla and Buju Bonson so years of listening just like listening

before I even was really doing anything and I can hear that you could definitely feel like it's like proving someone wrong if it's your hockey coach they proved like you were probably a good hockey player right? yeah I thought I was pretty good so they didn't fire you because of your skills.

They fired you because they assumed you're a pothead. Yeah. That must have fucked you up a little bit. It did, yeah. As a 14-year-old, especially when that's your love. That was my passion. Were you confused? I was kind of, yeah.

I probably was pretty confused. I think I just became more rebellious. More like like, oh, yeah, like, fuck you. Are you competitive? Pretty competitive, I think, yeah. Baby, would you say I'm competitive? I mean, yeah, I'm mellow, but I definitely have like a drive in me to be the best at whatever it is that I can be. Where does the drive come from? From angst or from just proving yourself that you are

better than you think you are? I think it's just that whatever it is that I invest myself into, I dedicate myself to, I want to excel at it because it's something that I've chosen that's important to me that I feel is important to either me or other people, whatever it is.

You know what I mean? Yeah, a lot of people take life for granted. You know, like when you realize that maybe we only have one shot at this, we want to be the best at whatever we're being the best at. And if it takes this fucking asshole hockey coach to put you on your path, at first you feel confused, but like maybe that guy saved your life because you're now you're a musician. Yeah.

Yeah. It's great. Life is wild like that, right? It is. Yeah, it is. I just,

I slowly understand. I'm like, so I'm confused on when from, was it Israel when you were 16 that made you want to start studying things? Or when did you start wanting to research religion or research just learning about things? Was it the hip-hop that taught you how to learn things? Not really. So, yeah.

So, when I went to Israel, I did have a positive learning experience while I was there because I was in more of a type of school where you kind of like, you know, you go experiential learning or whatever, where you go see the sites and then you learn about it. And the teachers are excited about what they're teaching. You're learning about your history. You know, as a Jew, that was something that was cool for me because I didn't know that much about it. Well, what did you first learn that you thought, like, this is very interesting about the Jewish?

Oh, like learning about like the zealots and stuff like that, like on Masada, you know, like... I don't know zealots and stuff like that like on masada you know like i don't know what that is um or um like basically like you know mount masada you know like the people that um they basically like when when the the ruling uh was that the romans i don't remember exactly who it was you know but they came down there was a whole rebellion basically in this group of people called the zealots which is where the term zealot comes from yeah they basically ran up the mountain to escape up to the top of this mountain and they fought them off by just like throwing shit down the mountain for like years and years and years and they built the city up there and figured out how to get water up there

and everything and there had a whole and then eventually when when um the you know the enemy outsmarted them by putting like the remaining jews in the front lines and walking them up first or whatever so they just did like a mass suicide on top of the on top of the mountain that's wild like instead of surrendering we're all going out together exactly you thought that was beautiful i just thought it was wild you know what i mean and that was part of what, like those kinds of things are what started to really intrigue me about like my history about being Jewish and stuff that I hadn't necessarily heard about before.

So when you quit, you quit school before you went to Israel? No, I went to Israel when I was a year, I was 16, my junior year on a program. So I was like a four month program, came back. And then I worked that summer at a camp in New Jersey jersey washing dishes i went to see fish and i was like all right that's it i'm gonna you know i found if i can't

get along with my parents and shit i'm just gonna i'm going on fish tour this fall so i went to my first day of high school got in a big fight with them and then my friend had a bus of oaks wagon so i was like you want to go to bur? And the two of us just took off. We went to Burlington. And then I lived there in Burlington for a while and did like rainbow gatherings and shit. Shut the fuck up. You were part of the rainbow gatherings? Yeah, yeah. What's the one?

I did one. It was Shawnee in Southern Illinois. I think it was. What did you learn about the people that go to those rainbow gatherings? It was wild for me because where I grew up in White Plains, there was a few hippies. Not many, but they were all a bit older than me. And the first part of that trip, I had been kind of alone. And it was a really tough time for me because I'd had some bad trips where I had no place to go because I was homeless.

You know what I mean? And you're just like where the fuck you know and and then um so I had a period where like I actually like stopped talking completely I was like mute for weeks like even at the concert this is before the concerts this was like while I was in Vermont and stuff and I was just like I guess getting used to like that life like it was so raw and just like, kind of like living on the street and all of that, you know? And it kind of shut me down. I just kind of like shut down. It's happened to me a couple of times in my life.

It happened to me also at one point when I was religious. What happened? It's like a disconnect kind of. But when I got to that rainbow rainbow gathering all these hippies from white plains were there and they had no idea that i had dropped out of school and like gone on fish tour they kind of remembered me as like this kind of like wannabe hippie custody kid and then i'm there like you know dreadlocks like in and they took me in and it was like it was like i had like i got to feel what it was like to kind of have family for a minute.

Right. So that was my takeaway from the rainbow gathering. That was a really special thing for me. So now you have a herd of people following fucking fish around. You're out there, what, 16, 17, making it work. What'd you see in fish that made you want to travel? Well, I saw like that. I knew that there was a culture, even from the dead and stuff,

of kids that just did this. And I was just like, I guess I just wanted to, you know, for me it was the music. That experience that I had at that Phish show in Worcester was the driving force. So it was like a lot of things around it, like not getting along with my parents, this, that, and the other thing. But that night,

that music like spoke to my soul. And it was like, this is why you're here. This is what you're doing. This is, this is like, this is your shit. This is home.

This is your shit. Yeah. And so I was just like, I don't know what it looks like. I don't know if I'm going to play guitar, I'm going to be in a band or what it's going to look like. But I have to fucking follow this right and for now that means going to fish concerts you know what i mean when i was 16 or whatever

so how long did that last for um that lasted for like maybe about six months or so and then i went home what trying to go back to high school and that didn't really work how did how was that transition back into your parents house horrendous what happenedous. What happened? I went to rehab, like, upstate New York. They made you go? Yeah, sort of. And then... Did you want to go? No.

No. And then that was a pretty intense experience of, like, being in a rehab with, like, you know, mandated New York City kids, you know, under 18. Yeah. Doing what? Coming from, like, being a hippie, like at fish. Yeah, exactly. Like coming from like being at fish shows and just taking acid like way too much of it. So my whole brain was, you know, a little bit.

So you were taking acid like every day. Yeah. At 16, that's- That's hard because you're still developing your brain. And your sense of yourself and sense of the world. at 16 that's hard because you're still developing your brain and who you your sense of yourself and sense of the world so the end of that

six month tour with Phish did you feel like you lost yourself so I came home pretty sick I was really sick like what

what was going like mentally or physically yeah mentally like everything I was kind of like a shell and then yeah so it took some time

so what I ended up doing was going on a wilderness like what kind of like a shell and then um yeah so it took some time so what what i ended up doing was going on a wilderness like what's called like a wilderness therapy program or in oregon in oregon yeah and that was an incredible experience for me parents have money no not no like middle middle upper middle income but we for that i remember like specifically like they didn't have the money and they borrowed it from friends or friends who told you about the wilderness thing um that's a good question I don't know I don't know exactly how we found out about it but my mom knew that I like love the woods in the wilderness and stuff so she was like you want to go on this wilderness like high school's not working for you and this then the other thing I when I go on this wilderness thing, I think,

I think she might've told me that I couldn't smoke weed that, you know, I had to be sober out there, but I was like, yeah, but it was the type of shit where they like take your shoelaces and then you can't, it's like,

it's like, it's pretty intense, but it was incredible for me. And you, you know, during that time, it was like, um,

maybe five weeks. So you do, I was out there for two of them, two trips basically. And you do these, it was like maybe five weeks. So I was out there for two trips, basically. And you do these three-day solos where you're alone in the woods for three days. You can't see anybody, hear anybody. Like isolation completely? Isolated. With your mind? Yeah, just you.

And no, I think we were fasting. No, we weren't fasting on that one. But then there were other ones where I did where I was fasting. Is it a Jewish place? No. No. And yeah, so just being alone and going through that three days alone, like in the middle of the woods, like in complete wilderness. Tell me, okay, so give me those three days.

What were you thinking about when you had to do those three wilderness days? How did you? I have journals, actually. I wrote from this time. That was a lot of writing. I did a lot of writing. It was where i like wrote the first song that i ever like composed what was it about it was called jumping mouse and it was a story that i had heard about you know that this this mouse that becomes an eagle you know that they told us on this thing so

you know i i would turn it into a rhyme or whatever into a rap and i had a melody that kept reoccurring in my head. So I would sing that melody and like wrote that. And I ended up recording it when I moved to Oregon. It's on a CD somewhere. So you even through the hardship of this boarding school, you still fell in love with Oregon? I ended up there.

That's where I went after this trip. Okay. I ended up in Oregon. So what'd you, so what, so you wrote, you kept writing, but what were you what were you writing about like what was like how are you like trying to like rewire your brain to feel better again through this three-day trip so okay so while i'm out in the woods there in oregon um yeah i mean i remember i mean my memory really is like the first the first day the first night it being really really difficult like a like a storm, being in the middle of a storm. And you kind of like, there's nowhere, there's no distraction,

there's nowhere to go, there's no way to get away from it. And so you just have to go into the storm, basically. And you just go, it's like a trip. And you just go head on, face to face. And you're sober. Sober, yeah. And then at some point, it's like, I think there's a term in the Kabbalah like a trip you know and you go you just go head on face and you're sober sober yeah and then you um and then at some point it's like i think there's a term in uh in the kabbalah called

called the sweetening of the gavura and that's kind of like the sweetening of the strictness and that's kind of what happens you just feel like this this vice just kind of like let go and um everything just kind of becomes became like really peaceful and like unified you think that's ego i don't know if it's like like the restriction i guess it's it's something to do with that like you're you're finally letting information into your heart or into your body yeah i haven't thought about exactly what the what the what the you know thing is there I think it's just like it's natural it's just like the natural flow of things it's like when you like don't distract and you go head forth into something there's got to be like some kind

of tension there has to be some kind of breakthrough I guess I guess that and you so you broke what do you think I don't know I think I go through those things where it's like I'm like you where I disconnect. I need to disconnect for three days. I've had that a couple times in my life where I fall further away just to try to, I don't know if I'm assessing what I'm doing, but there's always been a breakthrough.

When I was severely depressed on the road, I was microdosing mushrooms for about a year every day just to kind of rewire my brain to find who i am you know it's like seems like you lost yourself did that work yeah yeah so the microdosing helped you with the depression but it feels like it's the same thing as going being by yourself in the woods with your brain yeah and saying you know what? There's nowhere else to hide. Let's fucking figure this out.

Yeah, exactly. So you go into this trip and you passed it. Did you meet friends or did you start really diving into music then? Instead of going home after that trip back to New York, I went to this year-long program in Bend, Oregon. Bend's a cool city. Yeah. I went to this year-long program in Bend, Oregon. Bend's a cool city.

Yeah. And that program was just kind of like to try to help support and get you ready for the world, young people that are struggling or whatever. And that's where I started. Like a halfway house? Something like that, yeah. And then... This is all over just acid?

Or were you doing like blow? No, I was never doing hard drugs. No. No. No. You just went crazy over taking too much L. Yeah, I mean, well, my parents were kind of a little bit intense with it, I think. Yeah, well, like, you know, we're running. But I also was definitely doing probably more and doing things before most of my friends.

You know what I mean? Was your anger towards your parents still going on through this trip to Oregon? I think, well, no. At some point, I let go of that when I was in the woods, for sure, during that time. So you went to Bend. What was going on there? So, yeah. So I was in this program for a year.

And while I was there, I started performing at an open mic night. And that's where I met a- In Bend yeah i met i met a guy who lived there this dude aaron chambers who's just like sold weed and very charismatic you know playing guitar in the park and i started like freestyling with him and then we started our group together and we put a band together and um at the same time i was doing some theater. I was in the play Equus. I played the role of the main boy in Equus. Are you familiar with that play at all?

No. Tell me, what's it about? It's a special play about a boy who loses it and blinds seven horses naked. And the scene is naked. It's done naked. What's his name? Was in it from Lord of the Rings.

He played the role on Broadway. And you were the lead? I played the lead. You'd dick out the whole thing? Yeah, the way I got that role was that I was going through this incredible I was doing therapy, I had gone through everything that I had gone through

and I was sober now and I was putting it all together and I took an you know, putting it all together. And I took an acting class at the community college there and we had to write, we had an assignment to write a monologue. And I wrote a monologue where I described tripping at a fish concert and then being like tossed into rehab and like all these experiences that I had gone through and I said it in front of the class. Afterwards, like the whole class was like draw dropped. And the director of the class,

who was also the director of this theater. And he was like, he was going, kind of going out with a bang. He was the last couple of years. And he was always wanted to do Equus. And he was like, I found my kid to play this. Oh my God. So did he convince you? No, he was like I found my kid to play this oh my god so did he convince you no he was like I was all about it I was just like

fuck it like I was crazy when did you start getting into theater I did acting as a kid a little bit just like in school and stuff and I did an acting program at SUNY Purchase College you know and I had an acting teacher when I was a kid who really

was awesome dude what do you teach you that made you that that you learned the most about acting when I was a kid then yeah well he was just a trip because he was like they were like him and his wife were kind of teaching the class and they were just really cool people they were kind of hippies and pretty sure they were doing blow and um and smoking weed like during the class so basically like you know when we would come in it was like okay they were like on fire and we'd break up into groups and he would work with me one-on-one and i was he was just like buzzing around the room and and and and i was just like this is fucking awesome yeah and then they would do like cool downs where i think they would take turns going and smoking weed and they would have us

all in a circle and play the piano and we would just be doing cool shit so that's fucking kind of what i was like yeah this i liked it but did you like the people that acting attracted like the artist that is acting or like did you like i don't know i had some friends that were in that theater world and stuff, but I liked the idea of getting lost in a role, you know, getting lost in. A character. In a character and becoming that thing,

whatever it is, I guess. So you do this play, you dick out. Yeah. In Bend, Oregon. Bend is kind of, it's pretty progressive, but it's still conservative. It was early bend though. It was nine, it was 98, 99. So it was before like the massive wave that's happened, but there was,

it was on the up. So yeah, so I'm doing that. I'm sober. I'm coming out of this program and, and I started doing well and, and putting this band together. And then things kind of started to like gradually fall apart for me And the band kind of fell apart. And I was like, I had an opportunity. My parents were like, want to come go to college, come back to New York. And I was like, yeah, I'll do that. Came back to school. That's when I went to the new school.

And that's, I guess, the next chapter. That's right before I kind of became religious and moved to Crown Heights, Brooklyn. So when you said everything was falling apart, how were you feeling in Oregon at those last couple months? Well, I kind of like, I guess you could say I just, I started to just to lose it all. Yeah, I started to like, I was building something, you know what I mean? I was like sober and I was working on this, all this stuff. And then at some point I just like started to let go and let things slip. And within a pretty short amount of time, everything was pretty much crumbling.

Do you remember the moment that it started crumbling? Yeah, I do. What is it? I don't know if I want to fully expose all of it. Yeah, okay. It's like, I don't know. I haven't really spoken about it very much to tell you the truth yeah that's fine um so it's like yeah and it's tough and it's trauma

right yeah it was a it was a traumatic experience that you know i i had my part in in you know certainly in in in bringing bringing it like a car it was like a calm a karmic situation did you relapse after that yeah and you started doing acid again or were you starting into hard drugs no still i still wasn't really doing hard drugs then yeah it was more like um just smoking weed and you know occasionally tripping or taking ecstasy or whatever you know but um yeah some of those like trips that i have are pretty pretty rough yeah at that time like uh i bet man it's like going back into darkness like you haven't really healed yet yeah and then

relapse is crazy yeah like what is it that makes us relapse you know like and it could be the littlest thing that triggers our depression again yeah you know so you go back to new york you go to new school i go back to new York. You go to new school. I go back to New York. I get a job at Borders in the coffee shop and then the music shop with these really cool people

that work at Borders in the music shop. What was your vibe with your parents at this time? They were pretty proud of me for everything that I had kind of been through and I think they were

pretty supportive at the time. They were happy I was going to school. I was, you know, I think I was sober at the time to school. I was, you know, I think I was sober at the time. And then I was, you know, I remember like I had a dog that I would take out. I had my routine, you know, my little simple routine.

And then, you know, I was saving money to be able to buy a PA system. That was my thing. I wanted to have a microphone and two big speakers. I wanted a Mackie mixer and a Crown Power amp and these two JBL speakers from Sam Ash or whatever. Yeah. to have a microphone and two big speakers i wanted a mackie mixer and a crown power amp and these two jbl speakers from sam ash or whatever yeah and um i was just kind of like i wanted to be able to play tapes instrumental tapes really loud and just rap on a microphone

anywhere at them and not in the crib at my parents house or whatever in the attic so that's what i did so what did did they, here, I got a letter. So what are they like when you're blasting this heavy hip hop in the house? That's funny. I don't really remember too much. I think it was mostly when they were out at work and stuff like that. And then, and then I went to school. So I started living in the city and I had it set up,

you know, in the dorm room or in the apartment where I was living. And did you like New York back then? Yeah, I loved it. It was intense. room or in the apartment where I was living. Did you like New York back then? Yeah, I loved it. It was intense, and it was just a lot going on, and I was really getting into music, and I was really getting into writing and rapping and all that.

You felt like you were getting good. Yeah, and it was not because I was performing like how I was performing in Bend. It was all happening in my room, just me going to Canal Street, finding the tapes that I really wanted, and then doing this hybrid combination of hip hop beats and like dance hall singing over them. And I started really writing lyrics that I, and I could tell,

and there were a few times where I just went to open mics in the city. And when I fucking started doing my thing, people would just fucking lose it. And I was like, oh shit, this city. And when I fucking started doing my thing, people would just fucking lose it. And I was like, oh shit, this is different than when I used to sing like two years ago or a year ago in band. And it was like cool and people,

I was kind of people, like I was drawing people, but skills wise, like this was a whole different thing. What do you think changed? You stopped relying on other people and started relying on yourself? No, I just put the hours in. I just put the time and the work in. Yeah, and it wasn't but it didn't feel like work to me it was like smoking blunts and listening to hip-hop basically and just fucking just and just

like spitting and just writing and spitting and just spending hours and hours a day not going to class and just fucking doing that so you didn't go you didn't go to i went to i went to did you pass yeah i passed let's go i'll clap to that let's go fucking doing that. So you didn't go to New School? I went to some classes. Did you pass? Yeah, I passed. Let's go. I'll clap to that. Let's go. So when did you... Okay, so you're getting

into hip-hop. You moved to Brooklyn. You started getting religious? So, okay. So then... What happens now? Let me just take a sec. No, take a sec.

I feel like I'm just like analyzing everything right now. It me just take a sec. No, take a sec. I feel like I'm just analyzing everything right now. Stop me if I'm getting too therapy on it. No, it's cool. I'm just so curious and fascinated with you,

Manas. It feels like you've done... It's like you have demons inside of you. Yep. And sometimes it's like a herpes. They flare up sometimes and you got to fucking of you. Yep. And like, sometimes it's like a herpy.

They flare up sometimes and you got to fucking maintain it. Yeah. So like, and do these demons stay in your head all the time? Do they come back? Are they still around? Have you tamed them? Yeah.

I mean, I have, I have, I mean, there's a whole shit load that happens between where we are right now and between my demons getting tamed, I think. Let's go. Let's hear it. Years and years.

I don't know. I don't really know if we have time or want. Bro, we got time. We're going, bro. This is it. But basically, so I start. I'm in New York. Okay.

I start, when I'm there, it's exciting and it's awesome. But what I remember at the time is this incredible, like existential loneliness that I start to really feel. Again. No, like for the first time, really. Like I had felt it always to some extent, but now I'm feeling it like in a whole different way. Like, I guess it was some deep level of depression, which I had no idea,

but some like almost like a darkness, like a cold, like a storm. How old were you? 20, you know, 19, 20, 21. Came out of nowhere? I don't remember how it happened exactly, but I felt alone, very alone. And music was definitely like the place where I poured myself into.

And I knew I had this dream to be Matas Yahu, even though I didn't know the name, what, who, or what Matas Yahu was, but going back to that Phish experience and all, like the vision, I had the vision, bro. I just was like, going back to that fish experience and all like you wanted to be i have the vision bro i just was like i want to be doing music and i know this is my shit how am i going to do it there's a million rappers in new york city and there's a million people start getting intimidated so i was it just seemed like it would like i didn't know how it could

happen so i was like i'm gonna have to i'm gonna fucking pray for this so the prayer thing was kind of like in me. So I saw that when I was like 16 when I went to Israel. Wow. I witnessed that and I kind of tapped into that a little bit and not the religious aspect of it. And then being at the fish shows and rainbow and all that and that acid. So that whole concept of prayer, of like getting to this place where you feel.

Also the loneliness, kind of like maybe the only savior in all feel also the loneliness kind of like, maybe the only savior in all of this is God, you know, maybe that's a way out of this loneliness, you know, but that became kind of like the last option for me. I still was like fucking around with drugs and stuff. No, nothing like that. But I was still like, like fucking up, fucking around and fucking up a little bit and kind of like not feeling good about myself, you know,

feeling down on myself. And so I kind of, at that point I kind of went to, to God and I was like, I need to become a different person. I need to become something, a whole new thing. I don't know if that's the right way to go at it,

but that's kind of with the extremity and the intensity that I came. Kind of like shedding layers like an onion or skin maybe but I was just like I need to I kind of like jumped into a whole nother bag so I was just like okay I know I'm Jewish and I know like I could go Buddhist I could go Christian I like I knew I had to go to some kind of religion oh wow like I knew it was gonna go there yeah I was like I was like it's not gonna therapy's not gonna save me and like, I was like, it's not going to, therapy is not going to save me. And, um, cause I had done therapy at that point and good therapy, but I don't know.

I was just, that's kind of where I was at. I was like, I need a spiritual revolution in my life from the inside, like a total breakthrough. Yeah. That's what I wanted. That was my,

that was like my intent when I came at this. And, um, yeah. And I had done the AA and NA and all of that, and I really didn't want to go back into those rooms at all. So I was like, becoming religious could be a real option. And I started to notice Hasidic people around me,

like the guy who's shaking the Lulav and the Esra, asking people, are you Jewish? I started to become kind of intrigued. what intrigued you at first i don't know it was the very first thing that intrigued me was the prayer so i started because i didn't i wasn't looking for community i was a lonely cat and i didn't think, I thought maybe I'd find love or something like that. But other than that, I was like, I think I'm just a lonely dude.

I wasn't looking to like sit down at Shabbos tables and hang out with families and all of that. And I hadn't really studied that much yet. So I didn't really know that much about like the Kabbalah and the Hasidus and all of the crazy like philosophy in there that would later blow my mind. It was all about prayer. It was like, I was looking for a place to pray. That's what it was. Or looking for a place to like, put your dreams into the atmosphere. I was looking, no, I was literally looking for a place to pray. Like I was praying on my own. I had started praying and my i had found a a prayer shawl that from my grandfather through my dad and i started praying like at some point i you know

quit smoking weed or something and i'll go up on the roof of the new school and i would put the fucking prayer shawl on and i would pray on the fucking roof and um at like at like sunset time which was when i when that loneliness thing would like really strike hard every day. Right at sunset, right at the changeover. Where do you think that is from? I think that's an intense time of the day. Yeah, it's like change. Yeah, and it can be beautiful.

It can be intense. It can be, yeah. Well, maybe it's like kind of like this. If you take a step back, it's like you were praying for change and you see life changing from day to night. So it's kind of, you like physically see the change that you're trying to have. So you'd get depressed right at sunset. Yeah.

Well, yeah, that was when it would really hit hard. Cause you know, that's when it started to get dark. That's when you have to go home and there's no one there. You know what I mean? That's, that's when, um, I don't know, that was just a hard time. I remember specifically. So that's when I started praying. So when that started happening, at some point I wanted to move beyond that and I wanted

to find like a synagogue to pray. So I started exploring different synagogues throughout New York City and I would go to different places, like on this little like explorations. I was kind of like just doing it myself and I was like, how do they pray? How do they pray? Does this feel authentic? Does this feel cool? And the place that I found eventually

was the Karl Bach school on the Upper West Side, Shlomo Karl Bach. You may have heard of him. And so his melodies and the vibe in that school was just beautiful. So I would just run to that school. I would just run there to pray. I had so much.

I just felt the spirit of it. Yeah, it was like. And that was my entry into the religion. That was the way I kind of came into it. Did you have a kid young? Yeah, pretty young, 25 or so. And you're married? I was married once.

Now I'm remarried. Yeah, yeah. And this is your son? This is my son, yeah, Levy We should bring him in here Bring him in He's falling asleep over here Come on, get up here, bud He's heard all these stories

He's like, oh, not that one He's like, got another fucking story by Pops Yeah, sit in the Yeah, get in I want to hear what it was like, you know What's up, bud? Yeah, let him ask What's up, yeah

How you doing? Good, yeah What's the word on the street? What's your relationship like? What's up? How are you doing? Good, yeah. What's the word on the street? What's your relationship like with your pops? Incredible. Especially since I started making music and taking it seriously. He's been such a role model and helping me and guiding me through the journey. Was it hard having your dad on tour all the time?

Yeah. When I was younger, it was hard. having your dad on tour all the time? Yeah, like, when I was younger, it was, like, hard, but then eventually you get used to it and, like, start, like, manning up a little, you know? Yeah. Bar mitzvah.

What did he teach you about music that made you fall in love with it? Just, like, the love for music and, like, the joy of what it brings people. Like, I remember, like, especially with, like, school and stuff, like, I was never able to, like, focus or, like, sit at a desk or even if it was, like school and stuff like I was never able to like focus or like sit at a desk even if it was like even if it was like something that yeah you are

let's fucking go let's go that's what I'm talking about so your dad's a big role model to you yeah 100% so you guys riding music together what's happening yeah yeah what do you got the way his whole thing started it was before covid he always had an incredible voice like we grew up he grew up in khabad where it's kind of like push your way to the front and whoever's the loudest and he was always the

loudest like his voice always had a power to it and um he always sang but then at some point he started like writing in a notebook like like and he wanted he started recording on his computer and he started recording just on garage band and for i don't know how what you say was like a year two years he was just doing that like spending that time putting those hours in yeah and then all of a sudden he like he played me some shit with like a with like a really strong hook i'm like who wrote that and i'm like i i'm like do another one and it was just like boom boom boom this guy writes hits he's talented as fuck bro okay so what give me the inspiration give me what what who's inspired me to write these hits um i guess just like being in high school and like being on the journey.

I've seen like the road, like. It's wild. And everything. Also, they do a lot of stuff too. Yeah. Our divorce. Yeah. Yeah, all that. Was that hard when your mom and dad divorced?

At first, I would say. But then like, I mean, at first, like everyone, like they spoil you on both sides, you know, so it's not too bad. And like the middle of the situation in LA, I had this 71 Chevy. I still have it. I'm trying to sell it. And, but it's like drop down. And that was the car that we had. And then we were like living while they were doing construction on our, on this house that I bought. We were like living in this basement in the hills like yeah and in la one in la weed had just become legal it was just like i had my boys to myself it was like pizza every night watching tv and you know no bedtime all of us would just pass out on the bed together he's been he's had a lot of different versions then and then there was the niac house when we had the like the one point i was i was divorced before i got remarried and i had signed a band of three 20 year old kids and they were living in my house i bought this mansion in nyack on the river and put like a hot tub in the back for like 50 people and like basically it was

my three boys him shalom and menachem his younger two brothers and these three 20 year olds and me in this house and it was just instruments set up everywhere and just speakers everywhere family band it was insane it was total total insanity and then thank god my wife came into the picture and threw everybody out everyone's gotta go you want to get interviewed talia so how old were you when you like popped i was 24 maybe oh so you you got that you got a hit and then you had a kid right away i got the only way that the rabbis let me do music is if i got married right away yeah i had three dates married and kid right away it's awesome right away they're like irish twins really yeah so you you saw the growth of your dad's career at such a young age. And then you've seen the ups and downs.

Like, I don't know. You know, it's pretty wild. Like, you get a firsthand experience about the music industry. And do you... I have stage passes every time. Do you love it? Yeah, I do. Yeah, I mean, the cool thing is now this transition of him

having been a boy on tour and then a boy growing up kind of like in the midst of everything yeah making a decision and being like i'm dropping out of high school and i'm pursuing my dream to do music i'm coming on tour with pops go and he performs every night like he's spent years writing and recording songs in his bedroom. He's never performed, you know what I mean, until he came out on tour with me. And now he's performing every single night. He's on the road.

Why did it take so long for him to start doing this? Were you perfectionist about you wanted him to be ready for this? For sure. Because everyone's going to have a real strong opinion right away about him, if he's the real deal or not. So what was the first song that was like, this is the real deal? Which was the first one you did? The one with Salk.

Yeah. How'd the hook go? It was like a love song. About what? The love song. Just like, girl, I'm from back home yeah it's awesome something about you just want to be fine yeah the hook was uh i don't want to be your best friend i don't want to be your best friend i want to be your boyfriend oh let's go let's go i love it is it

hard to find a relationship while you're living on the road Can he sing you Yeah please Will you just sing him a lick of fake friends Just the angels you know Please Or like a little Just a little

Two lines Three lines Get up straight Hold on Get your breathing going I love this This is fucking awesome Like what like

Hit the song. And all these angels keep fighting. They talk in my head. They told me it's better if I go my separate ways. Oh, yeah. Oh, I thought that they love me. They just playing a game. Chasing my father and chasing the fame.

Oh, oh, oh Yeah Faith friends in this sweater She gon' wait Faith friends in a Faith friends in a Faith friends in this sweater She gon' wait Faith friends in a

Faith friends in a Little taste Let's fucking go! Let's go let's go go this is amazing are you proud i'm so proud bro i can't i can't tell you and like i can just say as a father advice to other fathers is don't stand in the way of your kid doing what's naturally right you know what i mean right i didn't push him at all on this you know this all was just like lay back play the right music you know in the car yeah the right artist that i i could start hearing him singing along all of a sudden i know he's like

singing along to patois that i don't even understand and i'm like oh you know he's got it like okay when he came to me and he was like, yeah, I'm ready. I want to start recording. You know what I mean? Yeah. All right, you got to do it. And we live in a time now where you can do it yourself. Yeah, and do you feel like because you live in a time

where we could do this ourselves, it just makes it even more special that you could do this with your son? Oh, yeah. I mean, like, he has sessions all the time at the crib. I'll have, like, cats up from Brooklyn, sleep over, and then I'll come downstairs and just check out what's going on, and then they'll throw me on a verse, and I'll get inspired and rocking out with him.

This is fucking epic. It's awesome, yeah. It's really cool. This is a great chapter in your life. Do you feel inspired now to keep writing music now that you have another generation of someone who's fucking rocking out too yeah i mean i wrote a record over covid that i did that is like a full like fully

about my family and it really and just naturally happened that way um it's a self-titled it modesty because it's like after all that time you know what i mean on the loneliness and all of that and all the ups and downs that we've kind of started to touch upon and it goes even deeper and it gets even darker um there was a time you know that it's come to just like full circle like this is this was the dream do you feel like you finally found happiness yeah for sure and i and i and i answer that i can answer that quickly and like very truly now and when people used to ask me that all the time it hurts so bad to say it yeah say yes or to or to say no it also hurt yeah now like i can see you asking

that question yeah what did you learn about um because that was probably the first time in your life where you weren't touring heavy so you're living with your family for like two years in a house like what'd you learn about. What did you learn about yourself? What did you learn about the family? I guess I don't know. That's a great question. What did you learn about your pop seeing him every day? To think about that one a little bit. I like it.

I like how people, this is how it is. A lot of people just go straight without thinking about what they want to say. And it's important to have time to reflect on what you want to be, who you want to be in life,

and who you want to surround yourself in life. And Modest, for you to have your family here with you and be in Denver, I just want to say thank you so much

for being here. It's really special to see the whole family. Thank you, guys. Yeah, dude. Appreciate you, bro. Let's go. Let's you so much for being here. It's really special to see the whole family. Thank you, guys. Yeah, dude. Appreciate you, bro. Let's go. Let's clap it up for this time.

Let's go. Let's fucking go. L-A-I-V-Y. Check them out on Spotify or whatever. I love it. Modest. I know you got to go do big things. I just want to say thanks for your time.

I really appreciate it. Thank you. We'll have to do multiple chapters. We're friends. This is just the beginning. I got one last question for you, and then have to do multiple chapters. We're friends. This is just the beginning. I got one last question for you, and then I'll let you go. When it's all said and done,

and you're in the history books, what do you want to be remembered by? Well, I guess for me, the main thing in my life that's been there from the very beginning to the end has been this connection to the lyric and the music. And to this day, I'm sure you have this as well, like meeting fans that are going through depressions,

that are going through all kinds of things, and your music is the thing that gets them out of bed. And it's only because you went through it and you were honest with your experience and put it into your music. And then that rewarding feeling, that feeling of knowing that all that darkness that you went through

was for a reason and it impacted people. Yeah. I feel like that's my main, like, that's my bread and butter, yeah. Keep fighting. Keep believing in yourself and keep believing in people because all keep believing in people, because all we have in this life is kindness, and

the people that we surround ourselves with, so thanks for being an inspiration. Thank you, Andy. Yeah, cheers. Mata shalwa, ladies and gentlemen. Thank you, man. You tuned in to the World's Health Podcast with Andy Fresco, and thank you for listening to this episode, produced by Andy Fresco, Joe Angelo and Chris Lawrence.

We need you to help us save the world and spread the word. Please subscribe, rate the show, give us those crazy stars. iTunes, Spotify, wherever you're picking this shit up. Follow us on Instagram at world saving podcast for more info and updates. Fresco's blogs and tour dates you'll find at andyfresco.com. And check our socials to see what's up next Might be a video dance party, a showcase concert, that crazy shit show Or whatever springs to Andy's wicked brain

And after a year of keeping clean and playing safe The band is back on tour We thank our brand new talent book on Mara Davis We thank this week's guest, our co-host And all the fringy frenzies that helped make this show great Thank you all We thank our brand new talent booker, Mara Davis. We thank this week's guest, our co-host, and all the fringy frenzies that help make this show great. Thank you all. And thank you for listening.

Be your best, be safe, and we will be back next week. No animals were harmed in the making of this podcast. As far as we know, any similarity, instructional knowledge, facts, or fake is purely coincidental.