Andy Frasco's World Saving Podcast - Lindsay Lou Gets Real About Addiction, ADHD and Life on the Road

Episode Date: September 15, 2026

This episode is brought to you by JamCut.IO (https://jamcut.io/). If you're a musician and you're tired of making clips all the time, check these guys out! Lindsay Lou joins Andy and Nick for a wide-open conversation about building a home with Kyle Tuttle, creating stability after years on the road, and why she can feel equally comfortable commanding a festival stage or driving for hours in complete silence. Lindsay gets candid about relationships, independence, ADHD, therapy, meditation, addiction, and her ongoing struggle to quit smoking. They also dig into jealousy, ambition, the Nashville and bluegrass communities, her reputation as the queen of the sit-in, and why sustainable success matters more than becoming a superstar. Plus, Lindsay explains why she and Kyle maintain separate band, and somehow the conversation ends with cigarettes, meth, toothpaste, and the meaning of life. Lindsay Lou joins Andy and Nick for a wide-open conversation about building a home with Kyle Tuttle, creating stability after years on the road, and why she can feel equally comfortable commanding a festival stage or driving for hours in complete silence. Lindsay gets candid about relationships, independence, ADHD, therapy, meditation, addiction, and her ongoing struggle to quit smoking. They also dig into jealousy, ambition, the Nashville and bluegrass communities, her reputation as the queen of the sit-in, and why sustainable success matters more than becoming a superstar. Plus, Lindsay explains why she and Kyle maintain separate bands—and somehow the conversation ends with cigarettes, meth, toothpaste, and the meaning of life.

Lindsay Lou, how you doing? Pretty good, how are you doing? What is it like being Lindsay Lou? That's my first question. Oh, boy. I mean, you know, I think like anybody, there's a lot. But it's cool. I'm like, Kyle and I just bought our first house.

What? Kyle Tuttle. So that's been sort of like consuming. me because I'm like I love nesting so much like everywhere I go when I tour when I if I'm on like van and trailer tour I bring everything and my kitchen sink and I like we I like try to book string of Airbnb's because I love being home you know and like my bass player is always teasing me because after the gig I'll be like, all right let's go home now because it's like wherever I like create a home wherever I go, you know? And I love that. I'm in Aries with my son's sign in the

fourth house. I love to nest. So that, does that mean it makes touring a little more comfortable? Because if you could make a home everywhere, some people can't have, don't have that in their brain. And that's why they hate touring. Yeah, I do feel like everywhere I go, I'm home. You know, And I've been, like, touring so hard since, like, 2011, you know? I've, like, never really stopped. Even during the pandemic, it's like I found a way. You know, I started doing the Riverbondogast thing and outdoor things. And there's really only been, like, three months there where I, you know, in the thick of the pandemic, where I wasn't off doing something.

So, you know, I, like, I don't. know, maybe I've, yeah, I think maybe I, I've, I love to nest so much and I love creating home wherever I go that I always feel like I'm home. And I do think because I've been doing it for so long, it's like, and in the early days, you know, you do so many homestays, it's like anybody's home is my home at this point. It's like I walk into anybody's house and open up the fridge because it just feels right. Right. Have you always been an independent person or you've always had like relationships. Both.

I'm like a chronic monogamer. I've been, I've been in a, like, long-term relationship since I was 14, you know? I've basically had, I'm basically on my third husband here. But I had like,

I had like a boyfriend in high school and we lived together in high school and in the first couple years of college. And then I met Josh and I was with Josh for 13 years. years. And we've toured together for all of it. And now I've been with Kyle for, um, this is almost your, I think we're about to start year four. Is that right? No. Yes. Yeah. Something like that. But I'm, but I'm also like, um, but I'm also like independent almost to a fault, you know? Right.

So it's like I've always had a partner. I've always been with somebody. And it basically goes like right from one person to the next person. And I've not really ever been single. Yeah. Which I sometimes I wonder about myself with that. But I also am like, you know, I don't know. I'm very much doing my own thing all the time, you know?

Yeah, it's kind of fascinating. Like what is it? what is it about always being in a relationship that you need to distract you, but you're also so independent. Like, it's like, do you need both to have a balanced life? I think so. I think so. I'm, like, a little bit obsessed with the notion of balance. And I think that that's, you know, I don't know.

I guess so. I think that's it, what you just said. What? Do you think your independence makes you a better partner though too? Because you're not so codependent on them and they can also have their own independent life too? Yeah. Totally. You know, it's not that I haven't had my flings with codependence, you know.

But I try to be self-aware. I think I'm very self-aware and really, invested in self-reflection and evolution in a self-reflective way, you know? It's like I've been, I do the therapy every two weeks and I've been doing it for the last several years and, you know, just try to keep myself honest with myself, you know? I think that it's like the easiest to become dishonest with yourself. And that's like the first thing you have to keep your, keep some, some eyes on. So, yeah, anyway, that being said, I have had my flings with codependence, but I don't think that it's in my nature to be that kind of person.

Have you ever had codependence problems outside of relationships or music? Is there anything outside of relationships and music? Maybe family, drugs. Is there a world out there? What about drugs? Oh. Oh, yeah, definitely. I mean, I'm on this, like, very frustrating ride with tobacco and have been for, I like, I was on, I was an, you know, epic pothead for a decade.

I've smoked weed all day, every day. and was, I guess, codependent with that. I think, I need to, I guess I need to think about codependent in terms of that. I always think about it in terms of a relationship, right, where you're like, encouraging some, you like want to uphold this. Yeah, I guess I can, I can see how that would work. But anyway, I wanted to get a clear head, so I took my first year off of all substances in 2017.

I called it Sober 17. And I started smoking tobacco as like a, like, because I love ritual, you know, ritual is like really important. To me, I'm kind of like a space cadet and rituals like keep me grounded. And so, you know, I wanted to have a clear head. And tobacco gave me the ritual, but didn't make me stone for the next, whatever, 20 minutes before I wanted to smoke again. And that was kind of dumb, obviously,

because, you know, they say tobacco is harder to quit than cocaine, which I've definitely found to be true. It is. I feel that way, too. It's also not. One of the most addictive substances. It's also not. It's like, I've listened to Allen Carr's easy way to quit smoking twice now.

And I really do believe everything that he says is true. He kind of frames it as like, you know, You know, it's not really about the nicotine addiction, which we know. It's like after, after like a day or two, the nicotine is gone from your body. And it's like, he calls it the nicotine addiction is the little monster. Like everything that surrounds it is the big monster. And the big monster is like all the triggers that you have and this idea that you have, this idea that we tell ourselves that it's hard.

It's like every time you tell yourself that it's hard, you're like, you're reinforcing. it being hard. And every time somebody else says that to you or you try to replace it with something else, you know? And he's, he like, he goes about the whole book just sort of dispelling

all the myths about smoking. Uh-huh. You know? And it's really good. And I, like, all last year I would do two months off. I was basically like a month and a half off, month and a half on. So I would quit for a month and a half

and I would smoke for one and a half. Because I like, The hardest thing for me is just being restrictive. I like, I love sort of self-denial of things, but also I, there's like this rebel, this, like, teenager, toddler in me that's like, well, you know, I don't want to do that, or I want to do that. You know, whether or not I want to or not, it's like, I just don't want to be told no. Right. You know?

I don't want to tell myself no even. And that's been the hardest thing, I think, to get over. But it's like just realizing that you actually don't want it is the easiest way to stop. Yeah. You know? Yeah. But it's like, and so then this year I like thought I really gave it up for real. And I didn't smoke for three months, basically January, February, March, half of April.

And then I was just at this chick's house in Nevada City And she had this cool yurt that I was staying in And it was a beautiful day And I was like, man, I just would love to smoke a cigarette On the deck of this yurt And I didn't I didn't do it I was on tour

And it's almost easier for me when I'm on tour Because I'm so fucking busy with everything To not do those things, you know, to not drink and smoke or whatever. But then I got home and I like got thrust into this house buying business. And I was like, okay, I deserve a cigarette because this is stressful. That's a trigger right there, yeah. This bitch is back, dude.

Here comes the real estate agent. Yeah, it's bitch is back. And it took me like, it took me like two weeks to smoke that pack. I would only have one in the evening, which was a beautiful thing. But then it was like A four-day pack And now I'm like every other day Or every three days or something

But it's like it goes so fast back to a pack a day It's so easy Especially when you're stressed out of new shit You know it's like It's like that Meditation That without doing fucking yoga Yeah

There is something to it There's something to it It's something about that sick dude It just kind of reset it And you're like You're like Ben Affleck In that meme dude And where he's just smoking a cigarette

Like sometimes you're smoking and you don't even want a cigarette. You just want to go smoke a cigarette. It's not really about the nicotine. It's just like, well, I just got down with my set. So I think it's time to have a cigarette. Or just like it's your time to be alone. It's about the ritual. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

It is totally the ritual, you know? And like, my therapist is always trying to help me find something to do like in place of that, you know? But it's like, yeah, just the ritual of like lighting something. And it's true. I don't want cigarette. I don't want the taste of my mouth. I don't know to smell like it. I don't want to feel it in my body, but I want to do the thing.

Yeah. And I don't, but I don't want to do the thing with something else. It's like I've, for a long time, I smoked spliffs and it would be like a third tobacco, a third, like herbs, like mullin and collinola and experiment and then a third weed. And I would try doing it without tobacco, and it's like, I just don't like it. I don't actually, I like, you know what I mean? I want the impossible. I want to smoke a cigarette Without smoking a cigarette

But I don't want the replacements Because I don't like the replacements I don't I've never been into vaping That does not appeal to me at all And who wants to smoke a fucking And the herbs just like don't do it for me Yeah you want to smoke a lavender cigarette Fuck that

Do you the real thing We're gonna find out in 20 years Those are actually worse for you than cigarettes I think too Probably Yeah All right Hope you're enjoying the interview But a quick message from our buds

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We love it. We fucking love it. What do you think it is this idea of when you can't have your way? You talked about this earlier. Is it? Tell me about your past with your mom and dad. What was your relationship with your parents?

Um, you know, good. Um, I love my mom and dad. There's, they drink a lot and my mom smokes. And I have a easy relationship with my dad. My mom and me are, you know, trying to work through the difficulties that we have with each other. Which is sad because neither of us want it to be like that, but it just is. But there's just like a lot of substance abuse in my family. You know, I've had like three, within like a month period, I had a month or two months,

I had a cousin die of a fentanyl overdose, an uncle die of a fentanyl overdose, and an uncle die of lung cancer from, you know, smoking like two packs a day for his whole life. Right. And that, when that happened, it was like, you know, fuck cigarettes, fuck tobacco, you know? And then when I started smoking and I feel there's so much shame around it. That's the worst part. I just want to be comfortable being myself and doing whatever I'm doing.

And like, I don't want to feel shame by anything. And there's, and just like knowing. And it's not that I'm, and I like talk to my mom about this too because she was in a similar situation where she like, my mom like smokes, but she's never been like a pack a day smoker. You know, she's like, she smokes kind of sparing. And even now, like she says, she'll go days without smoking, but she won't quit, you know? And she had the same thing where at once when Uncle Tom died, she, like, didn't smoke for a while. And then she did, and it's like, you feel bad about it. But then you reason with yourself, you know, you're like, yeah, but he smoked two or three facts a day.

And I don't smoke that much, so I'll probably be fine, you know? Music is more like, you know, it's like a spirituality. It's a, you know, and there's some similarities, you know, if I, I have some, this like thing where I'll want to practice and then it's like this rebel pipes up and is like, you know, adds, adds four extra things to my to do list that I'll just do real quick before I do that. You know, just like classic getting in your way business. But music itself is like just, I don't know, it's not at all. You know, like I do think that you can get like addicted to music in a way, but I don't have that relationship with it. I feel like, you know, my dad worked in a paper mill and was,

raised by someone who's 100% finish. And I think those two factors in him created like a really intense comfort with silence, comfort and and need for silence. So it's like, you know, well, I've like driven out to Montana with him a few times from the Upper Peninsula, Michigan. And it's like, well, they'll be like hours where we won't say anything to each other and it's comfortable and easy, you know. And, you know, the person's, you know, the person's, you know, the Paper Mill is like so loud that's like we'll be just driving in like a silent car for a long time. And when I drive myself, I do that also. Yeah, I do that too.

Yeah, I do that too. And maybe I'll sing to myself every once in a while, you know, as soon as I cross that in Indiana line, I'm definitely going to sing back home again in Indiana. Hell yeah. But then I'll listen like really intentionally to things, you know? And when I listen, like when I listen to a record, I'm going to listen to it four times. you know. Right. But it's like, it's a really intentional thing for me that, you know, and when I'm, when I am,

I feel the most myself when I am hiking around the woods or when I'm, when I feel this like sort of indescribable connection with my voice and with the people that I'm singing with. when that flow happens in the right way, that's like, that's when I feel the most myself. And, you know, in the flow. It seems like you're, people think that you're this huge extrovert, but you're actually an introvert. Yeah. And I think that we all are. I think, you know, it's convenient for us as people to sort of put things into categories, right?

to make it easy to talk about. But nobody is a, I don't, I really don't believe that anybody is 100% just extrovert or just introvert. You know? Like I would say that I think we're all on a continuum and I'm, I would say I'm probably more on the introvert side of things.

But I do love connecting with people. Yeah. What? God, you're pretty, I have a question about the silence thing. I have a question about the silence thing. actually. Do you find like when you're in silence that musical

ideas will come to you faster because there's nothing like sort of blocking it out? Or do you get more inspired when you're like listening to stuff? Both. I think both are, you know, it kind of comes back to that balance thing again. I think both are necessary. And I also do

periodically, we'll do like days of silence which happened because just from like losing my voice sometimes. and I found that I really liked it. It also feels like a sort of spiritual thing to not just like flap your jibs about things that you don't really need to and only communicate what needs to be communicated, you know?

I don't know. I like it. And I do feel like ideas come to me more so when I'm, moving, if I'm walking or driving or just like in movement somehow is when ideas usually come to me. And it's, and a lot of times it is if I'm, if I'm listening to something that inspires me, you know, I'll have to turn it off so I can, um, think about whatever it is, whatever ideas that's coming to me. Yeah. So why do you keep saying yes to all these fucking sit-ins? Is she the sitting queen?

She's a sitting queen? Really? Yeah. We love a good sit-in. I love it. I have, my mom was one of 12, and I have like 100 cousins,

and I just grew up where, like, the family gets together, and we, you know, sing Indigo girl songs and Beatles songs and various other, you know, Stone Toba Pilot songs and stuff. And it just feels right to,

for that to be. be the way that I connect with people. It's awesome. You know? And I also have like incredible ADD. And so I think that it's just really good for me to be in like always a new situation. Yeah. That is exciting for me to always be.

You know, it's like I belong to the band. Hallelujah. Yeah. It's awesome. Because like it's pretty amazing how you could just like switch to be the two different, Lindsay lose. Like you have two personalities, like a split personality. You hear this like extrovert ADD who's going to be the life of the party.

Or you're the person who's like a serial killer in your car with complete silence for five hours. Yeah. I fucking love it. I like it. So going back to the family and now there's like a hundred kids and siblings and stuff, did you feel like you really had to get attention? you really had to stand out really heavily or that was not the issue with your family?

Did you feel like you were lonely and no one was giving you attention? Or how did you feel with having that big of family? Like, so fascinating with people with huge families and how they become musicians because they want to be. The same. I grew up a small family, so fascinating.

And I kind of had like the big and the small family because in my immediate family, it's just me and my brother. But, no, I've always felt special. Yeah. And I've always felt, you know, like a individualist sort of, you know, I had a really, my grandma had, like I said, like 100 grandchildren, but I felt like I had a really special relationship with her. And I just like, I don't know, I couldn't, I don't think I have. was ever bothered by needing to stand out. It's like my earliest memories of wanting to be a part of

music, like the first memory that I have of that is one of the first ones is I remember my mom would always sing with my intemality and my auntie and my uncle Bernie. But my mom, my intemality were like, you know, lived in the same town, we're really close. And my intemality has a daughter, Harmony, my cousin. And I remember really wanting to learn Grandpa by the Judds and sing it with harmony. And I like have the, I can see pulling up to her house and I had to be like four or something, three or four, and pulling up to her house in Kingsford. And like, and it was fall and there were leaves everywhere. And I remember being like in my mind like, okay, we're going to do this. I'm going to go into her house and I'm going to tell her the plan. We're going to learn this song together.

And we'll sing together like our mom sing together, you know. And then fast forward a few years. I remember my uncle Stucky playing that he would always do Romeo and Juliet, which is a dire straight song, but he got it from the Indigo Girls. And I remember him singing it, and I remember my sort of cousin, Janice, and some other, there was always

like, with that many people in a family, it's like, there's a, it's like, there's a whole party's worth of people every time you get together of every generation. And so it's like, and the way that my grandma was this crazy hippie that took everyone in, it was like, there was always

extra extras, you know? Right. So I would watch my Uncle Stucky sing with these teenage, he was like in his early 20s and these like, you know, 17, 18, 19 year old, whatever people, they would sing together. And I remember being like, I want to be that. I want to do that. I want to like learn those songs and be the one that's sitting next to him at the fire singing the songs with him. And he actually went to prison when I was, I don't know, an adolescent. And he was sort of like the life of the party.

He was always the one that would take out the guitar and start the jams and the sing-longs and stuff. And he was just like kind of a Chris Farley character. So he was just like a big personality. So when he wasn't at the family reunions, I felt like I needed to be one of the people that like picked up the slack and learned how to play these songs, you know? And I wasn't the only one. My brother plays my cousin Jonah and, you know, there were other, in Michael Bernie.

There's other people playing with the acoustic guitar leading the jam. But I felt like a responsibility. And like it was never like I need to stand out. It was more like I had these goals and I had these videos. and I had these visions and these dreams of how I wanted to fit in and how I wanted to, like, what I wanted to do. And it's like, that's all I can see is my vision of how I want to be in this situation, you know? And it seems like when people have visions of their dreams, they normally come true.

Right? When you have a plan, when you have a vision, a lot of people who are just like, just like kind of fishing for dreams and don't really have a plan, it doesn't really seem like it comes into fruition, even if it takes 15 years. Kind of a difference between a vision and a dream, right? Yeah, exactly. So, like, you always knew this.

So instead of a dream, it was a vision. Like, you knew you're going to be on stage. Oh, yeah. There's also this, I'm going to put this, I keep seeing these text messages coming. I got to do not disturb. All sit-in offers. All the sit-in offers for the next festival.

Yeah. Will you please sing a judge song with us? Wait, what did you just say? The difference between dreams and vision. So when was the first time you realized your visions are coming true? Like you looked, maybe you saw a vision of you playing in front of 10,000 people when you're a kid and then all of a sudden you're there. And it's happening in real life. Yeah.

I think I have a harder time of like, I'm trying to be more ceremonious about when things come to fruition. because I'm like so much about getting there that it's like you can't even enjoy the wind. You can have so much more awareness about the process and then once it happens it's just like what's the next one? Like the journey destination team?

Yeah, totally. So I'm trying to be more ceremonious about you know things happening and accomplishments and I've another story that my mom has told me is like when I was three, we were at this birthday party for her grandpa. And there was a bunch of people there on Harsen's Island.

And there was a stage in the room. And I like, I don't know this guy, my mom's grandpa, you know. I don't know any of these people here hardly. But I apparently tugged on her dress and told her that I wanted to get on that stage and sing happy birthday for grandpa to all these people. And I will be headlined And I did Yeah I would like to headline this event

Like show me where the microphone is And I did it And it's like I don't like there was no like Like I don't know what it is in you that does that But it's always been there for me You know And it always and like And it just feels natural

You know there's not like a lot of I don't know. I want to say pure meditation because I can't say that because there kind of is, but not in the way that it's like I don't think I'm getting trapped here

and trying to put this into words. But you know what I'm trying to say. It's just natural. I get the gist, yeah. So the question is when you're allowing yourself to celebrate the win, how do you keep fine-tuning the dream so you can still have more wins? Does that make

sense? What do you do? Yeah, it's like sustainability is the ultimate win. Right. It's like you're not looking for necessarily one big high. You're looking for something that fills you up, that fills you up the right amount, you know, that is maintainable and can keep happening at the right pace with the right balance of all the things until you die, right? It's like we're not going to retire.

Musicians don't retire. No, they don't. So it's like, what is, like, how can I set this up that, you know, it's not like, you know, I've never had any interest in being a pop star. I mean, I did when I was like a little, little kid. But then I became a punk rocker and I was like, fuck pop stars and fuck pop music and the machine and all that, you know. And now it's like, you know, I want, I want success. in a, you know, connection with people in a big way.

And I want, but I don't want to be like somebody that can't go to the grocery store. Right. You know. I'm fucking miserable. Yeah. Yeah. And it's like, and I honestly don't even think that, like, I think that I have such a thick field of the energy that I put out.

That, like, you know, I don't know, not that. I don't know, it's like Gilling Welch goes to the grocery stores in town and people aren't going up to her. And it's like, you just wouldn't do that. You can see her from across the grocery store and she has like, I really do think that there's an energy about her that it's like she's queen. And not in a queen in like a rhinestone bedazzled sort of way, but in just like her spirit is so.

what it is, that it's like, you're just not trying to fuck with that, you know? Yeah, yeah, yeah. And I think that there is a way to do that. And that's like, ultimately, you know, what, did you ask me what success looks like? Because I am on that road to answer that question. Bring it. You're going. You're going there.

Yeah, we asked that about five minutes ago. What, do you remember what you asked me? No, we asked that five minutes ago. Just for peanut tree? Now we're full circle. We're cooking now. We're cooking with gas. We're cooking with gas.

We're cooking with gas. Give it to me. Yeah. Yeah. I, you know, I like, yeah, it's sustainability. That's what it looks like. It looks like a way of my doing, fulfilling my purpose, my life purpose, the thing that I feel like I have an aptitude and that I have passion about, you know, but it's not just one thing, obviously. Like I've also

needed to spend time with my cat because I'm obsessed with the guy. You know? Hell yeah. And I got and I got to be nesting the hell out of my nest because I'm also obsessed with that. You know, and I got

to spend time outside and on the water and in the woods and you know, a balance of all those things. But I also want to sing for a lot of people and have it like move them and give them a moment where that's all that's happening.

Nothing else is happening. Like, that is ultimately what I want. And I have had tastes of it, but I want more of that. Yeah. You know, and you do that. You do that every time. Oh, thanks. You do it every time you play.

You know, you do too, actually. I was going to say the same thing. I mean, everyone is raving about you all the time, and I finally got to watch your show. I'm like, fucking A, dude. One thing that's really changed my life of how I control anxiety and how I control. Going through my day-to-day of partying and playing really hard every night

and going into back to being a normal person during the day, I've been doing this thing called contrast therapy where basically I go in a sauna for 45 minutes. I do 15-minute intervals three times, and then I'll do a cold plunge between two to three minutes every other time. And through that, I've seen my dopamine level dramatically grow. I have been the happiest I've been for a long time. And it's all because of OTHERSHIP. OtherShip is a New York and Toronto-based company that gave me a safe space to find myself again

with their amazing saunas or amazing cold plunges and amazing community. I started journaling again. They gave me the opportunity to journal in the saunas. They gave me the opportunity to get deeper into my mind and get more comfort and the idea of being okay with myself. What I love about it, the community that other ship has brought me has really opened my mind that I don't need to go to the bars every night anymore.

I could go and talk to people outside of a social community that required alcohol or party. and I could go in there and feel healthy and talk to people and communicate. And that's one thing that othership has brought to my life that has changed my life. So if you're in the New York area, you should definitely try out othership. They got a great app, great community, and Toronto too. I know a lot of people listen to this podcast in Toronto too. But I go every day and it has changed the way I perceived life.

It's changed the way I find happiness in. the mundane parts of the day. So go check out othership. I guarantee you you will not regret it. All right, back to the interview. How do you approach, I mean, you know, you want so many things in life. This is a question I'm asked myself,

but I think we're very similar in this where we want it all. When you don't get to do all four things that you really want to do, how do you not beat yourself up? Oh, God, yeah. I always go back to the breathing Honestly

And the sicks baby And the goddamn sips And that's breathing Keep smoking them sigs That's breathing Can't smoke without breathing I know I know

It is like a version of it But Yeah I mean I'm like the master Of beating myself up You know I'm fucking good at that Oh yeah You know you want

That's like That is a skill that I have honed, you know, very much practice. And, but, you know, I, like, I went to this, I've, like, been trying to learn about meditation in various ways on various avenues over the last handful of years. And one of my favorite things I always kind of come back to is this workshop that I went to by my friend May Early Wine's dad, Michael. early wine.

Yeah. He gave this meditation workshop and he was like, he was like, you don't need it to like have your rug on the floor with your candles and your silence and your hour timer. It's like, like you can be meditating all the time if you just, when, you know, when you notice, first of all, you just have to be like noticing yourself, be an observer. and when you notice yourself freaking out or going back to whatever you know thing it is

self-abuse or you know smoking cigarettes shame or whatever things are smoking cigarettes oh my god I like wanted to smoke cigarette right now I've wanted to smoke zero this whole time

when you were like 10 minutes I was like 10 minutes that's exactly how long it takes me to smoke a cigarette Maybe I can do this real quick before we do this. Anyway. But yeah, go back to like, you know, like whenever I find my brain doing these things and tobacco aside, it's like just like all of my attention, I am breathing, you know. And like, whatever. I also have like helpful voices in my head that people have given me like my my ex-husband who I love so dearly

um you know he was like very uh you know just be very dismissive of things that aren't helpful you know like very extreme negative self-talk or whatever uh you know just like his demeanor it's like I can like that's a gift that he gave me that I can hear his voice being like, nah, that doesn't matter. That's not the thing. Right. And that's been helpful, you know? So it's like your community and your people and your friends and just like imagining them and remembering that you are a breathing goober.

You know, I am just a goober and I'm breathing and that is insanity. And that's enough. So it's like when I get into those tailspins to try to go back to that. You know, and I'm on the right medicine. I found the right A to D medicine that helped me tremendously, helped me from totally spiraling out. Like instead of like spiraling out for three months now, it's like a three-minute thing that I can walk away from.

That's good. No. I'm on the lowest dose of, of Adderall that, you know. They dialed in the dose of it. And like, yeah. And I, like, any higher dose is like too much, you know. And I've, and I've realized that.

It's like, I really need that five milligrams is the perfect amount for me. And I kind of like, I'm like a little bit in my head about, like, twice now, including today, It's happened where I was like, did I take that? I can't remember if I took it. I don't think I took it. Why would I have put the pill bottle on its side? You know, so I guess I'm going to take it again. But I also like don't take it in the afternoon.

Like I don't finish my prescription every week because it's not like a, you know, it's very much not like a party thing to me. It's very much like this shit just like makes me feel normal. And I like that a lot. And it's, but that amount I feel normal, and that's what I want. And I'm fine. If I don't have that for like the afternoon or if I miss it or something, I'm still okay. But like, I notice as like an overall theme that I don't just like fall into these rabbit holes that consume me for way too much time with this. I'm just, I'm not so easily overwhelmed.

and just feel, you know, kind of regular. Still all the things. I'm still like up and down in all the directions. But like in a way that doesn't, you know, put me into some serious darkness that is debilitating, you know, or like mania that is also sort of scary. Yeah. Different kind of debilitating.

It's crazy Adderall. When you are ADD, it actually calms people down. Yeah. It's not like, it does not like cocaine. where some people love atarole because they love the speed effect. Does that to me a little bit. Yeah.

Sell the pills. Sell the pills. Lindsay Louie becomes the Adderall dealer at the end of the month. She's like, I got seven pills left. Who wants a voice? It just makes me like a friendly normal guy when I take it.

I'm the same with mushrooms. I could take the microdoses, but the minute starts like tripping my head a little too much. I don't like it. I think that's with any drug, to be honest. It's like, that's why I think I feel like I'm kind of getting over drugs

because every time I take too much of a drug, I don't like it. Yeah. It's just, I don't like, I like having control. I think it's. Yeah, what do you think? I think we're getting to a point where it's like, you know, we're at this age where I don't want things to be harder. I want things to be easier.

Yeah, yeah. You know, I'm looking for, I'm seeking ease. Yeah. And like, when I start to feel a drug, like I'm on a drug or alcohol even, And it's like, that feels harder for me. Right. Like, I was, I'm, I have gotten used to just being me and dealing with that and all that means, you know? But it's like, the minute I'm, I'm like, feel the infant.

And mushrooms is like, yeah, I've realized that mushrooms, if it's more, if I'm feeling it, I just want to cocoon at this point. I've had nice times of mushrooms, but I also had, like, horrible, like, life-shattering times on mushrooms. But like now when I do it, it's like, I don't want to feel it because all I'm going to want to do is like, I need to be close to the ground, on the ground, in a cocoon. Right. That's all I want. And that's not what I want if I'm like at a festival or hanging out with people, you know? Right. Right.

That's for at home. God damn, I can talk to you forever, Lindsay. You are just like so calm. You're like the Dalai Lama. I know. You're very relaxing. Your voice is very relaxing. Yeah, you should.

Oh, dude, you should start doing like a meditation. and reading stuff? Or the books. Audio books. You should do like... I do want to do that. I think about that all the time. Oh my God.

I want to do it. And I just have this manager whose husband does that for a living and I was like, dude, like, hook a girl up. I want to do that. Your voice is like... It's very competitive and it's very hard and she was very discouraging.

But I need to look back into this. And there's not very many Tom Robbins books on audiobook. Right. So I think I'm just going to like do Tom Robbins book. Just send it in. Just send it in. And be like...

That's going to be like my audition tape. Yeah. You know? Or just like put it on Lipson and just like have it up there. She's like humans annex. Yeah, dude, it's like. What's Lipson? Lipson is like what podcast.

You could just put them up on podcasts anywhere. Audio books. Audio books. So you could just like... Oh, Libson. Lipson. It's like tune core for musicians and stuff. And they don't really test that shit.

So you could just like do it. And then you build a fan base and they can't stop you. Then you're just in there without having a manager. said you can't do it and that's what I do a lot. That's why I fired my manager. Oh my God. Andy's a big manager bypasser. I'm a big manager bypasser, Lindsay.

You'll learn that about me. Yeah. Oh, God. Yeah, if you want me to do something, like, tell me I can't do it. Yeah. Because that shit is the ultimate motivator for me. Same, dude. I'm so stubborn.

I'm so petty and stubborn. Like, that was the one question I was going to ask you. Like, does jealousy drive you? Not in a bad way. Jealousy is very annoying. I never like, I obviously, I do like to compare thing, which like comparisons are odious and not helpful. And also incredibly human. Yeah, exactly.

So I'm like, I do it and I also recognize it. But it's not ever jealousy, like, it's not ever jealousy and like I don't want that person to have that, you know? It's like, I want it to. I also want that. or, you know, and it's not jealous to, like, I feel any sort of negativity towards the other person, you know? Right. But, like, I don't know. I, like, I never, I am not inherently a jealous person.

I'm like, you know, I love when people are doing well, and I love when people have cool things. and in all of my romantic relationships, I'm, like, so fiercely independent and just, and I've always just kind of had, like, of, I don't know, like, of natural confidence or something that I just don't feel, you know, like I can be flexed with. And, but until, until this one, I, like, have these, like, jealous girlfriend moments with Kyle. And I like, no, I can see it. I can notice it happening. And I can fucking check myself, forewreck myself, and recognize it for what it is, you know. But I do feel it.

I'm like, for the first time in my life, I have that, like, I feel it. Oh, yeah. I am admitting to you in a vulnerable way that I experience that. You know? And, like, I think it's, it's like a little bit easier than it was in the beginning or whatever. But, yeah, you know, I get all the human things. I think we accept it now because we're doing cool things too. If we weren't doing cool things.

It does help. It kind of helps with the idea of, like, oh, yeah, I am being jealous instead of, like, oh, I'm being petty. I can just picture the person you're being jealous. I'm also looking at your Instagram, being jealous. of you. Yeah. Yeah. It's like, I think, yeah, I think age helped us with that. Because when we were kids, we didn't realize jealousy. We were just pissed. Right. It was a lot of that's just hormones too. Yeah. Well, I was, I remember like before I got successful that I was, I'm still not that successful, but when I was a kid fucking grinding in a van. Right. Making $8.00. Like, fuck this band.

Yeah. You're fucking doing this. And fuck this and fuck that. And then now I'm more successful. and I see other people being successful. I still get a little jealousy in me. That's healthy, though. But it's, I could see it now. I'm like, oh, shit, I'm just being jealous. More self-aware about it.

Yeah, so maybe that's the best part of growing up. See, I don't think I ever felt that. I've never felt that like, fuck that person. Fuck that. I'm always like, oh, yeah, I want to, like, listen more to that. And I want that for myself. And, like, that's sweet that what they're doing. And, like, how can I, how can I?

how can I do that too? So maybe it is a male thing. It's got to be a male thing. Like this, like we're always drive for competitiveness. I know girls that are like that too. Not that we're all, not both. Maybe a trends male. But yeah, maybe it is a more masculine thing.

Spill the beans. Lindsay, who's a shit talker? Yeah. Give it to us. Give us a good. I know those. Oh, man. That Nashville scene's got to be so petty.

Oh, the Nashville scene gets petty. There's so many of them. Oh, yeah. I know a lot of them. Not the people I hang out with him. Well, you have a good friend. I believe you. Yeah, I got good people

I'm like, I've never been a part of the Nashville That is like whatever is probably on the TV show You saw it. You know, it's like I'm a part of the fucking bluegrass community Yeah, that's true I want to get together and they want to pick Your whole crew And I like that because I just want to get together with people

And sing harmonies and sing songs And, you know And like write songs and you know All the people I've interact with Are in the same boat So I think we've got a good, all the people in this scene are people I want to be around. Yeah, like I keep wishing I met Vince Herman earlier in my life. And I feel like that whole crew, I think I would have been, I would have got through my trauma a lot earlier.

Instead of like my idols being like L.A. competitive people. I had more like guys like Vince Herman and guys like that now are like my really close friends. Actually talented people. talented but humble and like all about community. I felt like I would have got through this fucking jealous, petty thing way earlier in my life. But maybe. This isn't a podcast movie. But you got to go through the thing that, yeah, you got to go through what you got to go through.

And at the time you got to go through it. You're right. Man, it's already been an hour. We haven't even talked about music. Maybe we had to do round two with Lindsay Lou. Can we do round two with Lindsay Lou in a couple months? We just based on the base on the fact that it rhymes. Oh, I love that.

Yeah. let's keep talking. I mean, Lindsay, I'm a very big fan of you. And I just think you and Kyle are like the cutest fucking couple on the planet. I think about your relationship. My favorite moment was when Kyle was interviewing and didn't want to have in your, and you're crawling on the fucking floor. So you know what I saw.

Oh, when he was on the pot or whatever? Oh, my God. That is so funny. Like a fucking cat. He's like, I thought I had my invisibility sunglasses on or something. That's so good. Is he in your band? No.

Okay, I didn't think so. No. I was in a band with my husband for so long, for so long. And I like, you know, I really like, you know, I love playing music with Kyle, but I just so value being able to have a hard time on the road and lean on your partner for support. Right. You know, like we can do that with each other. where when you're in a band with your partner,

it's like, Josh and I would get off the road, you know, and we did it. We actually did a great job of it. We were epic teammates. But it's like we would get off, I would be having such a hard time on the road, and we would get home, and it's like now I have the sanctuary of home,

and now I'm just fighting with him about what it is because he's involved in it. Right. You know, even if it's not, even if it's not like he's the, issue. It's like he's so inside of it that like, you know, it's just, it's just, I like having, I like there, I like being able for Kyle to like call me and rant me about something that he's experiencing and me be able to like have space to hold for that because I'm not a part of it.

If I was a part of it, then we would be like arguing about the thing where, you know what I mean? Yeah. So I just really like, I like, I like. us, you know, it's like the profit thing where give each other of your bread but eat not from the same loaf sort of thing. It's like, it's nice to be able to, it's nice to be able to, like, have it. And that's not, it's not that I was like,

we'll never have musical projects with him or something. But it's like, I just am at a point where I, you know, and like, some lady came up to me and was like, oh, he should be in your band. He shouldn't be in Molly's band. He should be with you because you're good. enough and blah blah and i'm like lady i'm not i'm a band because i'm not good enough you know and then i start to get in my head like worry about what people are thinking yeah yeah that's like a backhanded

compit not even how it works it's fucking a noise yeah yeah petty stuff oh my god it was something like that anyway but it's like i'll fight over you lindsay he's not my band i mean i really do think that she was trying to say something nice yeah you know but it's like you know it's like that's not that's not it you know it's not as nothing to do with it i like having this i like having this your own thing being in it the way that we're in it you know and like can i just like have a person and not have to feel like i have to have every part of the person like can i have like his heart and his brain and not just his fucking amazing instrument yeah like yeah the fuck dude yeah also the band he's in is great too it's like yeah it's like just a bunch of great bands you know

All right. Totally. Molly's amazing too. Anyway. I love you. Get out there. Go smoke that sick. I love you too.

Yeah. Let's all go have a cigarette break. It's got a smoke break. No, but I'm proud of you. Keep going. I really feel like it's coming though. I'm about to quit, man. Me too.

I'm going to do this cord cutting workshop with Chris Corsini. It's going to change everything. Well, fucking, hey. If it works, send me all the info because I'm coming. Good luck. Check out Lindsay. on the road. She has amazing music.

We haven't even talked about it, but our fans know who you are, Lindsay. We don't have to fucking sugar-cooked shit. The best way to find out music is to go listen to it anyway. Yeah, go fucking listen to Lindsay. She's the best. She's got a good heart. And we didn't even talk about

the Michigan upbringing. The whole... Aren't you like in the fucking deep in the sticks of Michigan? I remember Nate Williams. Do you know Nate Williams? Oh, my God. Yes, I know Nate Williams. That's like one of our close friends.

He was telling me some great stories about you and Billy and the whole crew. Pretty exciting. I love Michigan. Traverse City, right? You're from Traverse City? Oh, I love going up there and playing. No. I am from the Upper Peninsula.

Me and Nate and Adam are all from the Upper Peninsula of Michigan, which is like... The woods. It's a whole new world. Muskegon's up there, right? It's its own thing. Yeah. No. I'm surprised you didn't get to Mather.

anything. You get to any meth or any of that shit? I did not. Good. I clapped to that. Was not. No. No. No. You got to keep that pretty faceless. No guess. Say no to meth. Not with those teeth. You got good teeth. We don't want you to fucking destroy any teeth.

I never had braces either. Really? You're just genetically superior to both of us. Yes, you are that pure area. Did y'all have braces? Oh, yeah. I didn't. I didn't. I didn't. My teeth are fucked. but I also smoke a shit,

how are your teeth not yellow? I'm smoking six. I'm pretty white. I brush him every day. Oh, every day. And I use fluoride toothpaste. Oh, Flora. You got to brush your teeth every day.

Oh, even in the morning? All right. Get out of here, Lynn. We love you. I got one last question before we do round two. When it's all said and done, one do you want to be remembered by? The love that I

The love that I gave and accepted Gave and received What the fuck? Jesus, an angel. Concise. That's an angel talk. That's an angel speaking to us. I'm not going to argue with that at all.

Thank you. Thank you, Lindsay. Thanks for your guidance. Thanks for your words. Thanks for being on the show. We love you. I love you too. Bye.

Bye.