Another Below Deck Podcast - Back to the Spark | Below Deck Down Under S3 E16

Episode Date: May 20, 2025

Pat and Dylan are back to break down corn, peas, The Pitt, sparks, flames, love, puke, stabilizers and more from Bravo's Below Deck.Patreon - Patreon.com/AnotherPodcastNetworkYouTube - https://www.youtube.com/@anotherbelowdeckpodcastRULA - Rula.com/BadTV

The cultural phenomenon, The Secret Lives of Mormon Wives, is back with an all new season now streaming on Hulu. Where is everyone at? Mom Talk has gotten to a really hostile point. Demi's willing to kick Jessie out of the group. I feel like I'm walking into a line stand. It's gonna get messy, for sure. Mom Talk is turning on each other left and right.

The police are here. I can't see this going any other way, but a pure bloodbath. This is so toxic. The Secret Lives of Mormon Wives now streaming on Hulu. The Heart and Stroke Lottery $50,000 VIP deadline is May 23rd. Play for your best chance to win $1 million in Ontario. Buy tickets at heartandstrokelottery.ca.

Lottery license, REF 1444-518. Must be 18 plus. Please play responsibly It pretty much worked out. I mean, he's a financial mogul and Carl's bad. Yeah. Well, he's the CEO of a headphone company Yeah, who wins all the time? Who's the person that says we're winning? We're winning Charlie Sheen Charlie winnings right definitely not winning. He has eight. Hi hello, welcome to another Ransom Banking new episode of another Below Deck podcast. My name is Dillon, that is Patrick.

Great to be here. Permission to come aboard. Permission granted. So Baby is coming next couple of weeks while I'm gone. Rubes is going to take over. Probably two episodes. Yeah, be nice. I mean, you'll probably like her more than me anyways, so, but if you don't, just be

nice. I don't think that's true, but definitely be nice. And I will say, Dillon, we might be able to knock out episode 1 of below deck Oh gee, I believe that is in our that is a good point Mariah Carey Give me iTunes ratings reviews five stars kind words join us patreon.com slash another podcast network summer house is wrapping up, but if you want Baby story, I mean we're gonna have so many APS. You want to head over to patreon.com slash another podcast network.

Give us five bucks and you will hear all the stories behind what our lives are actually like. If you're interested in that. Yeah, you'll hear about all the birth of Lucy, me fighting with the doctors, all that stuff. Okay, so we have got the penultimate episode of Below Deck Down Under. Okay, so we have got the penultimate episode of Below Deck Down Under. So weird. Well, today we're going to be talking about Koala. It'll be later in the episode. Actually, it's a different sponsor. It's Rula. Rula, Rula. Wow. Love Rula. Love Rula so much. We're going to be talking about them later.

You know, speaking of Rula and therapy and stuff like that, a lot of dreams today. I don't know what was going on. There were referring to the episode. Yes. It's like five. There's a couple of people that I don't mean to, I don't mean to get snippy. What else would I be referring to? Oh, you do dream therapy. Oh, yeah. Okay. So yeah, no. And can I tell you something? I'm glad I'm taking a break for a while. Good. Okay. It's like, how much is this stuff? I mean, I agree. It's like ridiculous. I stay in a hotel for what you pay for that stuff. Crazy. I could buy a bunch of

sneakers with that money. Telling you. You know what I mean? Yeah. Nerd clusters. Have you had any again? No. You know, uh, you had said something really funny and I agree with it. Uh, eating nerd clusters is a Hiawaska for the tongue. Yeah, yeah. That's a... Yeah, no it really is. It really is. If Willy Wonka was a real man who hated children like he did, he would have invented those things. I mean that's a real Willy Wonka kind of invention, the nerd cluster. I mean it's really important. Chocolate. Who needs chocolate? And you know what I heard recently, it's not even chocolate. It's called chocolate candy because it's not Chocolate. Who needs chocolate? And you know what I heard recently? It's not even chocolate.

It's called chocolate candy. Because it's not even chocolate. They can't even call it chocolate because it's not chocolate. So they call it chocolate candy because it's not chocolate. It's chocolate candy. It's like a tuna fish sandwich at Subway.

How dare they call that tuna fish what they're laying in that bread. Yeah, yeah, yeah. What do you think it is? I think it's cardboard and fiberglass parts. You think? With a little mayonnaise it's cardboard and fiberglass parts. You think a little mayonnaise I've been on a tea kick. I haven't been having a lot of coffee. God damn it Just heard recently that the micro plastics from tea bags

Oh, yeah You can get seven grams the average British person has seven grams of pressed plastic in their brain after all the tea they drink Yeah, so I think I gotta, I think I gotta switch back to freaking coffee but I don't know. Listen, get in the comments let us know what we should talk about next episode for like five to seven minutes before we get into the episode. Yeah, so let's talk about it. OK. Dreams. Dreams. I have thoughts about this episode that

has nothing to do with dreams. Do you ever watch I Dream of Jeannie? Yeah. It used to be on when I came home from school, and no one was home. Why did you add that? Oh, I was a latchkey kid. You just come home, you throw something in the microwave,

you sit down in front of a television and wait for adults to come home five hours later. Did you pleasure yourself to it? Are you kidding me? Absolutely not. I was a little kid. Oh, OK. How old were you? I don't know, eight. Oh okay. Yeah it used to be like I dream of Jeannie, Brady Bunch. And she was a witch? I don't know.

Okay go ahead. Okay. Below deck, Captain Jason, you are a star in my eyes. This episode, Captain Jason, you are a star in my eyes. This episode, production even gave you your own peanut M&M camera. That's pretty amazing. And what did you do this episode? And I, please feel free to reach out to me directly to explain yourself. I don't think guess that you had said you planned on smashing their yacht vacation. Appreciated basically being on the equivalent of a roller coaster for 24 hours. Fire up the engines on that goddamn boat and drive it back to the dock so people could sleep at night.

What were you thinking? I hope that tip is zero. I cannot tell you how goddamn angry I would be. What did we get? What did we, we could have gotten a dinghy if I wanted to rock around Like this, okay. It's like one of those pirate ship rides at all the carnivals and stuff You know what? I mean, is that what you said? I Reference Disneyland. Oh you did. Mm-hmm. Is that right at Disneyland? It's definitely at Legoland. It's a Legoland

Is that a ride an amusement park ride or is it a circus ride? Well I just went to our local fair for our city and they had one of them there. They had one of them there? Alright. It's pretty amazing to see how they set those things up. They're so large and they're on multiple trucks and they just drive them to the next town. I know and the people that set them up are constantly covered in sludge and dirt and

I think they're on drugs so that's why I don't get on them, right? Well, anyway, um, I like the episode It is all over the place It broke out last episode and it's it's making its way through several couples. Yeah. Yeah Uh, and I can I completely understand why Harry don't talk to my mother like that. Hey, mom. Nah. Hey, mom. Five o'clock in the morning where she is and you clearly can't see her face on the camera. And also, don't talk to my mother like that. She can't call your mother mom? He can't call me. I'm Bree. He can't call my mom right now like this and say that we're dating. We'll get to it

You know my father-in-law Ruby I call him dad and he's only 11 years older than me. It's pretty awkward No, I like how you call people so you call my dad dad and you call my mom mom That's right, and it's endearing the way Harry did it. No. Mm-hmm. Yeah, I think he realized she was pulling away He was doing everything he could to get her back. Yeah. Yeah Yeah, do a different thing though. Uh, I don't know if there's anything really notable in this Let me see. I'm just kind of looking through my Nope this was this was a bad one. This is 10 knots. Okay 10 knots a very low score

Some people I saw in our comment section there they're pretty tough on this show, Dylan. They had said that once Weehan got fired, they just stopped watching. It's like, is that what kind of commitment you have to a full story of a season? Hey, I don't blame anybody for anything, really. OK. OK, so I thought this episode was kind of good actually kind of

Were the only thing is like boo, you know Laurence arena are our friends again, even though they're not and they hate each other and they've always hated each other and never actually I've been friends one time but we do want to see one of them. I mean ideally kill the other I mean that would be kind of peak reality television. I mean we always talk about it kill the other. I mean that would be kind of peak reality television. I mean we always talk about it what a ripple effect of a death in reality TV would cause you know. I mean the rags would be completely aflame with the news and you know it would really benefit this show because people would flock to it go I heard somebody died on Below Deck. I've never watched it but I've got to check

that out. One dude almost had his leg ripped off. Oh yeah that's true. That's true. And he's really helping people now. He's kind of like a Tony Robbins type but with a blender. It's changed his life. Two pots. Go ahead. Okay, should we start the show? Yep. Okay, so the show starts with Brie comforting Lara as Lara incorrectly states that Captain Hotpants never complements her. With production here, you know we have cameras, a quick look back at the season easily rebuts that claim. Yeah, and I didn't think I was... I thought I was gonna have to rebut that claim, but just kind of in my bones. You know, because we watch these shows and then we kind of forget about them, but there's an energy imprint, a memory that's vague. Yeah. Almost too malleable to really

grab ahold of. But when she said he's never paid me any compliments, I've, I thought in my head, well that can't be true. She reminded me of my wife. My wife will go like, totally. You didn't tell me I look beautiful today. And I said, do you remember this morning when I grabbed your ass? That's the same thing. Yeah. A hundred percent. God, women are so stupid sometimes, you know? That's me saying how beautiful you are. Yeah.

It's like, what don't you get? I went up to you and I squeezed both of your boobs and I did like a bicycle honk kind of sound. Yeah. That's me telling you you're beautiful right because I wouldn't do that to somebody I didn't think was beautiful you know what I mean oh god damn it it's so fucking annoying but yeah I didn't I'm not the biggest fan of Laura evidently productions now because if they like you this does not happen to you it does not get the role that

happened okay so Serena calls mom well I was gonna say one thing quick before we like you, this does not happen to you. It does. You do not get the Rolodex. It does not happen. OK, so Serena calls mom. Well, I was going to say one thing quick before we move on to that call to mom. Bree reminds Laura that she's freaking awesome at her job. And just like that, they both agree that they're best friends, which in the Sea Route world means they'll never see each other again but will like each other's posts.

Yeah, 100%. I wonder if Target employees have to do this to their managers. Like, Greg, I think you're doing a fucking awesome job, man. You're killing it, pal. I mean, the Yankee candles, every time I go over there, there's always a full rack of Yankee candles. And without you, we wouldn't have it.

My point is, it's a little embarrassing to have an underling kind of gas you up. Having to prop you up, I know. There's not a lot of people in this work environment, though. That's true. They'll take it where you can get it. Serena, honk honk, calls her mother. And we're back on this I'm confused

because I thought we were going to be best friends, and I don't understand what's happening, and I'm crying thing. Well, she tells her mom she's upset and this season She says is really triggered her and it brings her right back to that child's or where She didn't get invited to all those parties and in the school cafeteria Kids threw food at her like she was like a donkey at the zoo. Yeah, I added that to make it more sad It does make it more sad. I mean, think about a kid being outcast from kind of social gatherings. That's sad. Now think about the group

of kids just throwing things that are going you're not invited zoo animal. It's pretty cruel kids can be cruel. You know, I've spent I can actually relate to Zarina in this I've spent a good portion of my life trying to prove to kids that I went to middle school with. awesome. Uh-huh. So When I became the number one recap podcaster for the T-Greek TV program below deck. Yeah said look at me you losers Yeah I did say that totally

Has have the kids gotten bullied yet? My kids the bully Really? Yeah. And she's trying to explain to her, you can't be mean to people. They don't like that. They're not going to like you.

She came home. It was an hour thing last night. One of her dear friends, Margo, told her she was mean and didn't want to hang out with her anymore. This upset Ellie. Ellie said, and this is how Ellie processes it, I don't want Margo to come over anymore. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

What, what, what? She called you mean because you were being mean. Yeah. And then she kept saying, call Lennox, call Lennox. That's her guy friend. And Ash, I want him to come over. No more Margo. I don't like Margo.

Mom, get out your phone and call Lennox. Wow, Ellie, you gotta calm down. Oh my God. Ellie, you gotta tell her it's better to be bullied than a bully. My mom's convinced it's this other girl that's getting her to be a bully and I'm like honey we can't be those goddamn parents that start blaming someone else's kid for our kids behavior. I'm trying to be

even keeled here. I'm kinda hoping that Lucy is a bit of an outcast. You want him to get along with everybody. You really do. You know? You want them to get along with everybody. Yeah? You really do. You know what? You know what I said this morning? I said, I want to train her to be kind of a bitch, you know, like if somebody's invading your space,

you know, you go get the fuck out of my space. And my wife said, you know, she's gonna be whatever she's gonna be. I mean, what are you gonna do, you know? And Patrick, how true is that? Aren't they just who they are? I mean, do you have they are who they are? My daughter is so gross.

I'm on a daily basis. Forgive me. Skip forward 30 seconds if you want to be grossed out. Is constantly picking her nose and saying, I'm going to eat this daddy. And I have to chase her. I'm like, this is disgusting. This is grossing me out. And I don't want to see that again. I'm so excited for is disgusting. This is grossing me out and I don't wanna see that again. I'm so excited for all that. It's gonna be a lot of fun.

But anyways, we get back to the show. And the deck crew is, can I say this about Serena? This is something talking about who you are, who you are. I don't think Serena has a good gut. What's that mean? You know, certain people are sussing out. You look at a cornfield, you know, an intuitive person will go, I think this is where the corn needs to go. And then there are people that are like, well, you know, you know, we need to get going on this stuff.

And the intuitive person's like, well, I don't know how to get going on it. I just think that's where it should go. And then there are other people that are like, okay, well, I can help you come and build the scaffolding of all this. Because in that regard, you're completely useless. Are you making the metaphor there are doers

and there are talkers? No, no, no, no, no. What I'm saying is there are certain people that let's say you look at a cornfield of people right and you go okay still in the cornfield yeah we're still in the cornfield there is a person they go you know I can tell these people are good people the rest of them are bad and then there are the people that are next to them they're like well let's kill the bad ones and that person's like well I can't do that that's why you need both. I got you. You know what I mean? This was almost as confounding as Hot Captain Pants Jason's metaphor about fire and letting fighting go. Well no

that was a great one this is bad. Okay. But what I'm saying it's but about Serena's I think she has a good gut. Gut. Yeah yeah yeah. Gotcha. So there are certain types of people that can really like suss out who somebody is. I see. You know, intuitive people. I think Zarina wants to be liked. Zarina, I know you listen to the show. And I think that's a good quality.

I think that's a good quality. Yeah. The cultural phenomenon, The Secret Lives of Mormon Wives is back with an all new season now streaming on Hulu. Where is everyone at? Mom Talk has gotten to a really hostile point. Demi is willing to kick Jessie out of the group. I feel like I'm walking into a lion's den. It's gonna get messy for sure. Mom Talk is turning on each other left and right. The police are here. I can't see this going any other way but a pure bloodbath. This is so toxic. The Secret Lives of Mormon Wives now streaming on Hulu. The Heart and Stroke Lottery $50,000 VIP deadline

is May 23rd. Play for your best chance to win 1 million dollars in Ontario by tickets at heartandstrokelottery.ca. Lottery license RAF 1444518 must be 18 plus. Please play responsibly. Well, you know, there are no good or bad qualities unless you smell, that's a bad quality. I just watched this doc last night called the liver guy or something. The liver guy? The liver God, the liver King.

The liver King. He lives on eating raw meat with his family. Yeah, well, he's a primal. Primal. He's a primal ancestral. He's also a fucking fraud. He's been on roids for 10 years Yeah, yeah. Yeah. I mean you look at somebody like that you go. Well, that's not liver. That's that's extremely advanced chemicals

You know cuz our ancestors didn't look like that Definitely not. Yeah. Well, anyway later we have dueling perceptions of where Harry and Breeze relationship stands I always love when they bounce back and forth what the guy thinks while he's telling his buddies and what the girl actually feels about the relationship. He thinks they're gonna make it official and she's been diagnosed with an early stage of the ick. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's also important to mention that it looks like somebody took a shit in the bottom of the jacuzzi. I mean an actual shit. Yeah, I wonder what's going on with that that looked disgusting. How does it get so dirty like that? It's just absolutely gross thing with Brie and Harry is

We don't care To two reasons one breeze already come out and said that they're not together, which if I was Bravo Put a muzzle on that right let's keep that that trap shut Okay, cuz we we we gotta be invested. And two, it's already difficult to be invested because if I could see rats, I mean, what sea rat relationship has ever turned into a relationship?

Well, I agree wholeheartedly with you. I don't think anyone's, any of them have ever made it off the boat. No, no, no. I'll say this. I mean, they've sailed around the highways and byways of the waterways of this world and you know slammed away at each other, but they've never really

paid taxes together or anything like that. You know what I mean? If you're a Sea Rat and you actually got married and it's still working out, let us know. I want to say this about Brianna and she was a lovely interview and if you're a pig that could fly Don't think we're gonna be beginning a lot of feedback on that question You survive falling out of a plane at 2,000 feet hit us out. Yeah, let us know Okay. Well women are complicated Dylan Yes Um, okay. Well, uh, women are complicated, Dylan. Yes. You know, Bri at some point had urged Harry to,

I think give her more affection or show himself more. And when he did, uh, she felt she was being suffocated. Well, I think what she wanted was, and forgive me for being crass, but I think that she wanted, uh, the hammer thrown down or some type of, um, she wanted the hammer thrown down or some type of sexual, sensual masculinity to be shown. And Harry just got even more, hey Arnold, which is Harry and maybe, who knows? I mean, I'm not in the bedroom with them

standing in the corner going, that's bad. Don't do it that way, do it this way. I'm not that. No, no, that would make you pee-ditty. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And I haven't been following the case, but I've heard that it's sad. Well, I always love the lawyers.

They go out opening statement that are representing him. Okay. We are, you're going to hear over the next six weeks is going to discuss you. Okay. You're going to hate this guy. He's not a good guy. All lies. He is a monster.

Okay. He, he slathers come from another man on his chest. He's really gross Well, and that's not that's not what is it illegal? That okay. All right out of all of the things you could have picked out of this bouquet of awful from P to D Taking a man's seed and rubbing it on your chest is I would say 90th on the list I mean, that's you know, not something that you and I would do but I mean listen Some people would take a look at you know, let's say cream pie Kathy and go well

How could someone put themselves to that? All could set to get out. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Well anyway, I yeah I just get the highlights from like a couple podcasts I listen to but it is what's going on with David Scandavelli and Brian you're talking about brothers no no who's the guy that's in Deadpool that is Deadpool oh allegedly they have asked for Taylor Swift's text messages with Blake Lively not gonna go well and Apparently from a very reliable source and this will be fascinating Blake Lively threatened Taylor Swift to delete her text messages or Ten years of text messages that will make them both look bad will be out there for the public to view

That's gonna be amazing So here's what I think is going to happen in the next month. And you heard it from Patty first. Are we gonna get a trial? We are not gonna get a trial. If if what Blake Lively needs to do is pull out a checkbook, write a check, and bury this. Here's the thing though, here's the thing though. I think Justin Guarini or whatever his name is is on a warpath and I am Drooling for this salting of the earth. He is on a warpath. He's suing the New York Times He's gonna get money from them. Yeah, and he'll take it up to the very edge, but

40 million dollars is 40 million dollars. You want to talk about shrapnel though, Ryan Reynolds 25 years of goodwill and movie watching of this young man. Imagine, imagine, imagine the dieting. The dieting alone, let alone waking up at three o'clock in the morning to get all the fucking makeup on and having to shoot it. It's like in those shitty Deadpool movies. It's like, it's like are you kidding me? Why couldn't we just be nice and then this ruined your career? She'll never work again Anyway, all right. So meanwhile meanwhile Alicia slaps Nate's ass

and Captain J man pops that fucking top off for a little Jacuzzi side performance review with Laura. What do you think about this? Jason popping the top off? You're taking his shirt off you're referring to? Yeah. He does it as much as he can. You think? Yeah. I think he just broke up with his girlfriend too. He's a hot commodity at Bravo Cod.

I think J-Man could pop it off a lot more often. But maybe it's appropriate in this environment. You know, it is maritime lords, sea rats, it's yachting, but still, it's like. You're a person in a position of power. Yeah. Yeah. When is your boss? Like, can you imagine freaking Goldman Sachs, CEO, popping his fucking top off in a board meeting?

I mean, it sounds like it's a different. He asked to step down, actually. But not on these fucking things. Yeah. So he goes and chats with Lauren, says that you need to figure this out. And she says, it's all Serena. And he goes, well, let me ask you something.

Did you say sorry? She's like, what the fuck are you talking about, you idiot? Did I say sorry? What a stupid question. And we're all with the J-Man. This is just, ugh, my god. Well, I'm kind of with him to a certain extent. I do agree that he couldn't let it go with her passive aggressive comments

It was too insurmountable to overcome so he forced her to chat and initially this conversation as you pointed out Dillon did not go well, yeah, how Laura appears incapable of letting the beef go and The matters were not helped as I pointed out at the top of the show with Jason's rather dumb metaphor of fire as possibly Yeah, now here's where you're wrong. This is a beautiful metaphor. He turned into a Rafiki type sage for a moment and said, let's go back to the spark. Spark, spark. You see, if you go back to the spark, because in conflict resolution, we can, in fact, time travel. We can time travel emotionally. And we can go back to the spark. And you see, a spark is the beginning of an elemental wave of destruction that for that

moment can be snuffed out with just the tap of a foot. Right now, we're trying to dump Gatorade on a wildfire and it loves the Gatorade, it thrives on that, right? But if we go back to the spark... Well I'll read the transcript and we'll let the audience decide. Okay, you see every fight starts with a spark, then there's a fire, but you have a foot unless it was blown off in a landmine. But if you have that foot, you can step on the fire and then there's just a spark He sounds like the pastor at my church, yeah, so get in the comments Let us know because that does sound pretty nonsensical. Maybe I wasn't listening closely enough. That sounds like What?

What the fuck do does that even have to do with them anything? All right, you know what I'm saying? I have to bring that up Do you know the best animal to sniff out landmines a German Shepherd now rats Really? Yeah, you know over there and in the canopies where we dumped all those fucking bombs. Yeah in the canopies where we dumped all those fucking bombs? Yeah. Laos and stuff? Let me guess. You have a helicopter drops off a big box of living rats,

and like a Marine just starts hocking them in the woods. And if there's an explosion, there was a mine there. Oh, no, no, no. Oh, man. That's a brilliant way to. I didn't even. That's not the correct application of the rat, but that is an amazing application. Now it is cruelty to animals, but let's say you go, uh, you

know, I was talking earlier about having a good gut. You're doing a little loop, you go, I think there's mines over there. You drop a crate of rats off, right? They all scurry, and they just blow up all the mines. Now, they're dead, right? Yeah. But you found where the mines were. No, these rats are giant rats. They're like a foot and a half long. And they're on leashes.

And they train them to sniff out bombs. Now, the reason why they use rats, right? Let's say you've got a German shepherd named Sammy. And you've put all this time and care into training it. Let's say we have a tough Tuesday out in the minefield. Sammy steps on something he didn't smell. Sammy's dead. But a big disgusting rat, it's lighter. So if it steps on something, it can recalibrate. And if it goes hot, you know, to hog heaven, getting blown in half, it's not that bad. Just a rat

It's a rat, you know I feel bad for rats cuz no one really even the nicest dog lover has no empathy for rats I have empathy for rats. But yes, it is the opening monologue of glorious bastards. It's very confusing. We hate rats Yeah, there's a bunch of poisons for them at you can buy at Home Depot. Yeah Anyways beginning back to the show though. Oh, yeah. Yeah, I was gonna say I stopped watching the history channel, which I had renamed World War two channels After I was just watching like these Germans train a bunch of German Shepherds and I was like, oh, that's sweet What are they doing?

At least they had a friend and then I saw that they basically trained the German Shepherds to go under Enemy tanks and then detonate the dogs who were wearing Detonators on their backs. I was like Jesus fucking Christ. I'm not watching this anymore. I gotta tell you There's all these turning point Docs You know these these Docs on Netflix turning point war in Iraq and Vietnam and stuff and I want to watch them I just canceled my Netflix subscription Vietnam and stuff, and I want to watch them. I just canceled my Netflix subscription. The cultural phenomenon, The Secret Lives of Mormon Wives

is back with an all new season now streaming on Hulu. Where is everyone at? Mom Talk has gotten to a really hostile point. Demi is willing to kick Jessie out of the group. I feel like I'm walking into a line instead. It's going to get messy, for sure. Mom Talk is turning on each other left and right. The police are here.

I can't see this going any other way but a pure bloodbath. This is so toxic. The Secret Lives of Mormon Wives now streaming on Hulu. for your best chance to win $1 million in Ontario by tickets at heartandstrokelottery.ca. Lottery license RAF 1444-518 must be 18 plus. Please play responsibly. Isn't that crazy? Not really. Okay.

It's a troth of dog shit on there. I finally canceled it and you know what set me over the edge? The movie, you know what set me over the edge? What? There was a movie with Russell Crowe, Robin Hood. Remember that? Yep.

In the beginning of the movie, there's a little parable, a little quote that says when the tyrannical abuse the townspeople or something, the outlaw picks up its sword. They cut it out of the movie. They cut it out of the movie. How do you know that for sure? Oh, I know it for sure.

I saw it on Instagram. Wow, interesting. They don't want that message getting out there. And you know, I'm a radical communist, right? So if they're cutting out some kind of protectorate of the proletariat message and then rolling Robin Hood with Ridley Scott

and Russell Crowe, it's like, no, that's the important part right there. If you're doing that, Hey, miss me. I, uh, I don't like Netflix cause 95% of their content, uh, feels like it was written by a four year old. Well, there's also that. So I'm done with Netflix. All right. Grossest part of this episode, Nick, I'm going to ding you. You're barely on this show.

You cut your goddamn toenails in a trash can. I don't have a problem with the trash can. I have a problem with his timeline of hygiene. You cut your nails pre-shower, not post, sir. Do you cut or tear? Oh, I could never tear. Really? Cut. And I do it over a toilet bowl. Yeah, I think most people are cut. I'm a freak. I do a tear. Oh, I know how crazy that I make

an incision. Oh, and then I do a tear. Oh, can I tell you, I had to trim my wife's toenails the other night because she's so pregnant that she, you know. You were doing the tear thing there? Well, she goes, I need you to come in toenails. I go, I don't know how to do this. You know, you guys have all got your painted nails. How do you know where to cut with the painted nails? So I was very worried about it. She was like, don't worry about it. Just do it. Right. I, and I go about the way that I normally do it. I make an incision. I tear she goes what the fuck I mean, she lost you're grossing me out. I feel like I'm watching an episode of Grey's Anatomy during

Operation. Yeah. Yeah. Well, let me tell you something else. You know what? She's been watching lately pit Pit I that passes, but I've never watched it. So me are doc. She's a squeamish lady I walk in the living room the other day. She's got this thing on They're freaking jamming their hands and a guy's freaking nose and busting the bone out. And so I'm like I'm not watching who is watching this. I don't care about the interpersonal drama. That's disgusting So Serena and Laura finally give it up. They apologize to one another and like I said boo But listen, we all need moments to heal. And you

know, it can really help with that. Tell me, Dale. Well, I need to know, you know, it, I think I do. What is referring to rule? We're referring to rule. Now, Pat, you know, the beauty of ruler, right? Yes, I do. I've actually, maybe I've actually used their services. And if you've noticed, there's been a quite a difference in my demeanor lately. I'm much more chipper. You have been so amazing lately because like before Rula, I gotta say I didn't even want to do this podcast. I was like this guy, he all he talks about all he talks about is stuff that I really don't like. You know what I mean?

I felt that way too. I was going to fire myself actually. I know, I know. And we had a conversation, I was like, listen, you don't need to fire yourself, but maybe like. Get some help, I think you said. Get some help. I mean, like how would you even freaking fire yourself? But listen, RULA is very, very helpful if you've got a very busy life, okay?

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were like I think you should get on RULA and I was like what the fuck and we got into another fight. So anyways join the thousands who have already turned to RULA for support on their journey and you listen getting started is easy turned to RULA for support on their journey. And listen, getting started is easy. Just visit RULA.com slash BadTV today. When you sign up, they'll ask how you heard about them. And please support our show by letting them know that we, in fact, sent you. It's a simple way to help us while you take the first step toward the care you deserve. Go to RULA.com slash bad TV now and connect with a

licensed therapist who truly cares your mental health matters all right back to it all right so the Sea Rats head out for their big night out and this is when Nate who I really like Nate Nate is good at his job he's so likeable yeah and later on the episode when she essentially ends their whatever the hell they were doing he's such a sweet guy well again it's like the forensic accounting for Doriton PK she ends nothing there's nothing there there's nothing yeah there one could argue the conversation was pointless but when I hear what Nate was thinking because he shares with us that he actually

Manifested a future with Lisa and it went down like this They'd get married. They'd buy that nice little house There'd be four little ones running around in a white picket fence and oddly enough an angry Greek guy punching the fence Yeah, that was weird. That was super weird and I gotta watch this show I gotta pay closer attention because I miss all this stuff but you know he's talking about fireside chats it's like hey Nate pump the brakes buddy. I don't know if you know who FDR was but he was old and had fucking polio okay that is not sexy. We're trying to we're trying to slam away in a bunk bed okay. I don't know what the hell you're talking about.

Freaking fireside chats for some people watch summer house with their loved ones. Americans listen to me. It's like, no, we're trying to freaking just abandoned it. Oh yeah. Oh my God. Yeah.

So listen, I have been waiting all day to hear your thoughts on this dinner. What dinner? Oh, well, what? I'm sorry. I just I wrote a note down dinner and I meant the Sea Rats having dinner. Sorry. The dinner that happens later. And it was kind of reminded me of COVID, except it wasn't eating between, putting your mask on in between bites. It was barfing.

Oh yeah, yeah. I thought you were thinking that it reminded you of COVID because what was played, it looked like a virus. But we'll get there. Anyways, so the night out is fun. The boys all go to the bathroom. What's your take on boys going to the bathroom with each other?

Bathroom conferences are stupid. Yeah. Yeah, they're very dangerous too. I've had a couple of Vegas bathroom conferences that have really gone awry. You go in the bathroom and you're doing a little cocaine. And for some reason, the guy who was standing standing there who you thought was just charging you too much for a lifesaver is like hey you can't do that and then he goes and gets people

and it's like whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa I thought you if I buy all your lifesavers yeah I'll make you a hole dude and don't wrap me out he's like no way I wouldn't do that I as rules lifesavers cost $65 you think my integrity is worth $65 He goes and get someone and then they're like you go to you for this like whoa. Whoa. Whoa, you know You can't do this anymore cuz now Las Vegas is all regulated and they're just there to make money There's no you can't buy people anymore One thing that I learned the last three times when it was still fun Yeah, is you go up to the person the coat checker?

Which is normally like or they hold your bags Which is within an eye shot of like all the gaming and all that stuff you hand that person back then like 25 or 30 bucks Yeah, and you hand them your alcohol and then you just they you basically buy them to be your bartender your alcohol. And then you just they you basically buy them to be your bartender. It used to work and you wouldn't have to buy talking about fucking golden nugget word word at Circle Bar at the Hard Rock Cafe. I did I did it at another place to just come over and they go here's 30 bucks. Here's a 12 pack of Bud Light. Here's a tequila bottle. Yeah, me and my

buddies are going to stop in and here's the code word they come by and just pour it for him no problem sir who's awesome you can't get anything for 25 bucks nowadays you can't get a fucking tic-tac for $25 in Vegas I hate that place yeah I gotta tell you my favorite car wash the reason why it's my favorite car wash, you go up to the guy, you go, I can't be waiting around for an hour. Okay, I need this done in 30 minutes. 20 bucks, you go to the front of the line. Of course.

Is that just the way it is with all car washes? For most people, you're paying for concierge service. It's like, hey, you pay it a little bit more you get ahead of the line Yeah, yeah, yeah, I felt car washes take way too long. Okay I felt so bad when we went down on our little spring break vacation down to San Diego about a month ago we went to the Animal Safari Park and there's a tram ride where you actually go through the entire park at last stop you real quick Yeah, I want to hear the rest of this story more than I want to talk about below deck

But I want to I wanted to and I've been the chief abuser of this tonight But what do you think the breakdown of below deck and nonsense has been tonight so 50 50 50 50 you think should we cut that? No, no, no, no, I don't think so. I just I just didn't think this episode was that great. Yeah, okay, so what happened? So I was kind of torn here because you could pay $20 per person and you could skip the fucking line and get right on that tram. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I was like, you know, my time is money. Yeah. And I saw about 250 people, all families waiting in line for the tram and it was was a 90-minute wait, but... Snooze you lose, losers. But essentially $60. Yeah.

And I'm not made of money, but that could skip that line. And I would have to wait the 90 minutes. And I paid for it. And I got on that tram in about 4 and 1 half minutes. If I was forced to go to an amusement park, like Disneyland or something. Oh, you won't be forced in the future. No, I will be.

The cultural phenomenon, The Secret Lives of Mormon Wives is back with an all new season now streaming on Hulu. Where is everyone at? Mom Talk has gotten to a really hostile point. Demi's willing to kick Jessie out of the group. I feel like I'm walking into a lion's den. It's gonna get messy, for sure.

Mom Talk is turning on each other left and right. The police are here. I can't see this going any other way but a pure bloodbath. This is so toxic. The Secret Lives of Mormon Wives now streaming on Hulu. is May 23. Play for your best chance to win $1 million in Ontario by tickets at heart and stroke lottery.ca lottery license. REF 1444518 must be 18 plus please play responsibly. I think I would pay I'd probably if you could save up some shackles if you know you're going into an amusement park I'd fit I'd pay $50 a ride to not have to stand in those fucking

lines. Well, you can pay 1200.,200 and you can basically skip the line. You have a concierge. You're going to have tips. So it's going to be like. It's $1,200 a person, though, right? Is it $1,200 a person? I think it's $1,200 a person. Yeah, that would make sense.

Yeah. That would make sense. Because I've booked those before. Oh, for, yes. Yes, yes, yes, yes. And they're upwards of, I was like, Disneyland's not supposed to cost $10,000, yes. And they're upwards of, I was like, Disneyland's not supposed to cost $10,000 though. It can.

Wow, that's crazy. You have so much money. That's so crazy. All right, so when they rise, Serena inserts into Alicia. Oh, no, no, no. We're still at dinner. She inserts herself into Alicia and Nate. and she goes, what are you doing? Zarina let her make her own horrible mistakes.

Okay. Harry tells Bri that they need to chat about something. And when we get back to the boat, we get said chat. He is very, did you get the memo HR manager about this entire thing? I must say it was the way that he handled this that this didn't go sideways fast Had he come out of the gate and said I think you should be my girlfriend and I think we should be together I think he would have gotten some pushback the very fact that we now have these and I'm old now So I don't understand

these different words and titles people have, but I guess the word they used is exclusive partners. Yeah. Okay. It is a stepping stone, a stepping stone, apparently, to officially being boyfriend and girlfriend, but it's not there. It's like someone between first base and second base, her bra's off, but you only have your hand on one nipple. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. I think it's a sign that we're doing too good. You know? Oh yeah. We're really, you know, we're really over complicating this stuff. Maybe I'm just a crabby old, you know, mid-30s. Mm-hmm. I completely disagree with you. I think that he went about this in a vaginal drying kind of way.

I mean, I thought the entire thing was just way too tepid, way too tepid, way too probably, way too tepid, you know what I mean? I mean, he's dancing around the entire thing, all nice guy and stuff like that. I'm like, Harry, you gotta grab her and say, let's be non-exclusive partners. I need a little bit more gusto. Non-exclusive partners. Yeah.

Ah ha, what are you, are you listening to Tom Likus or something? Yeah, well, Harry. Harry, son, you tell that little lady that if she doesn't start sleeping with you and get some kind of exclusivity that you will be begging other girls, okay son? She has three dates. I meant to say exclusive partners, but that is a great speech from one Tom Likus, but

I can imagine a coxman out there some girls starting to catch feelings. He goes listen I really care about you and I think that's why I'm willing to commit and Label our relationship and non-exclusive partnership, you know, I think that would be perfect for us. I'm doing that because I care so these kids anyways Nick and Marina are also, would you guys bang already? Like, whoa, you guys are kissing all the time. How do we know they're not?

Oh, I guess we do know they're not, because the cameras we show us in Black and White. The cameras definitely show it. Harry slams Breeze head into the ceiling. And we get to the Nate and Alicia chat. Alicia says that she is a supernova and that he is also a supernova and because of that they can't really be together which I guess makes sense

because if you think about explosions they're not really gonna date they're just explosions you know what I mean I mean that wouldn't even make sense. Yeah well I have the transcript yeah she tells him her heart just isn't ready right now You know cuz Johnny was just a couple weeks ago and then she touches the wood on the bunk bed And she says do you see how smooth this is? He says yeah, she said I sanded this with my vagina That's how turned off I am by you That's what she said yeah, I Thought that was hard, but it's it's good when you see a visual example to make a point. Oh my gosh yeah. Wow. Because we're

talking about... Yeah we're talking about pretty complex kind of constructs here you know so if you can point at a wall and say I sanded that with my vagina Yeah, it really gets driven home. Yeah, I'm like I get it now. Yeah Beforehand I had no idea what you were talking about supernova here supernova that not that do you know all that messy stuff? And now it's completely crystallized So we have to get to the last charter and the next morning. Next morning! Laura has a sex dream. She was underwater with Jason.

They saved a bunch of children. And then after which they had sex. That's pretty crazy. Fish curry is going to be for the, the sea rats are gonna start, don't give me fish curry. Make sandwiches. Don't. Don't give me fish curry make sandwiches don't don't give me fish curry um i'm with weirdo adair they start talking about uh harry and bree being exclusive partners and weirdo adair is like i don't know what the hell that is

i don't know what the fuck you guys talking about boy has she really fallen in the background on this television show? A little bit, but listen, we have to get to a very important meeting. It's time for The Preference Shape Minute. Laura does not want to do this because of the underwater sex dream, saving the kids underwater sex dreams. Well, because she's worried that Captain Jason will hear about that dream. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Well, you shouldn't mention it on a television show. Yeah, maybe keep that one to yourself. But it's amazing. You mentioned that the J-Man got his own GoPro at the bottom of the M&Ms. He also got inserts of him walking out of the beach winking at Laura. Oh, that's right.

Yeah, he's the hardest working man in fake reality TV. Yeah, Carlsbad finance people. Yeah, OK. So the charter guest names are Laurie and Wynn. Wynn. Yeah. Okay. I think his parents need to be killed. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I named my kid Awesome. Right? It's gonna be a punching bag for the rest of his life. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Your parents seriously did that? Yeah. OK.

Win. Because I get W-I-N-N. OK. Irish name or something like that. Yeah. Win is not. But I mean, look, it pretty much worked out. I mean, he's a financial mogul in Carl's bed.

Yeah, well, he's the CEO of a headphone company Yeah, who wins all the time? Who's the person that says we're winning? We're winning Charlie Sheen Charlie Sheen winnings right? That's right. Definitely not winning. He has AIDS He's being blackmailed for the better part of five years, which he was paying the money. Does he have AIDS? He has AIDS. You know what? Definitely not winning.

He has Steve winning. He has Steve Bannon energy to me. Like when he's under fire in an interview, he's just like, yeah, it's tiger's blood. Can I get you anything? No, you can keep being rude. Do we have any sandwiches for this bitch? Yeah. AIDS, huh? AIDS. Wow. you can keep being rude. We have any sandwiches for this bitch? Yeah, AIDS, huh? AIDS. Wow. He's like, I'm coming out and telling everybody that I have AIDS and this gravelly voice

because I have AIDS, but also because I was being blackmailed and they're like, Are you going to continue to pay the blackmail? Not anymore. Obviously, we all know AIDS. Right. That's so crazy. All right, so we've got to call Josco in on this one. The engine is not working and they give Dylan at Yacht Service a call. We'll see what happens with that in a moment. Jason and Laura chat. He starts to, you know, kind of, you know, they break down the, the Kim and the her and Zarina thing. And, and you know, she had this dream earlier where they were saving children and having sex under water. And he's talking to her about Zarina. And then all of a sudden you're something dripping

on the floor. He's like, what the heck is that? And she's like, nothing, nothing. And he's like, it's so weird. And then Zarina comes in and they all hug. So it was a sweet moment Yeah, yeah swept under the rug. Yeah, so um say what say shells the charter guests arrived. These guys are excited, huh? When when is an amped up professional? Yeah, you could tell he's got that energy

Yeah, real campaign or this guy Laura says half one for lunch now. I'm a big fan of the quarter to Have you know half after or half to. Half of one, that could be two different times. It's not very clear. I mean, forgive me, maybe I'm just American or something. But if you say half one, don't you think that could be 130 or 1230? I do. I think they need to start using military time. Yeah, 100 percent. 1300 hours. OK, Alicia has grown from trying to kill the crew with food to pretty much. I think the same thing, but just not that. Hmm. The killing part. Well, yeah, she did serve that

call curry that was ready to kill everybody yeah, too hot Yeah, she's grown as a person, and she plans on going to culinary school. Yeah, yeah, where you know Probably strip mall and Van Nuys, California. Yeah, yeah, yeah Or the CIA it's so funny to me that the the prestigious, well, one of the more prestigious culinary academies has the same acronym as the Central Intelligence Agency. Isn't that crazy? Yeah. You know, I went there for a work event. Yeah. The cultural phenomenon, The Secret Lives of Mormon Wives is back with an all-new season now streaming on Hulu. Where is everyone at? Mom Talk has gotten to a really hostile point. Demi's willing to kick Jessie out of the group.

I feel like I'm walking into a line instead. It's gonna get messy, for sure. Mom Talk is turning on each other left and right. The police are here. I can't see this going any other way but a pure bloodbath. This is so toxic. The Secret Lives of Mormon Wives now streaming on Hulu. The Heart and Stroke Lottery $50,000 VIP deadline is May 23rd.

Play for your best chance to win $1 million in Ontario by tickets at heartandstrokelottery.ca. Lottery license RAF 1444-518. Must be 18 plus. Please play responsibly. This is a nice building, huh? Oh, it's beautiful, the campus. Yeah. They're like, this class, they spend a year cooking bread.

I mean, a year is nowhere near enough. You know what I mean? I was like, wow, yeah, I can get a lot more done. You could, you could tell me what yeast is doing for an entire year. I still wouldn't know the end. Uh, just, you know, you, you bloom it and that, you throw it in that. It'll do this do this yeah I look at bread making videos I'm like who has the time yeast and proofing and rolling and prune now that's not how you run now you get out of here I'm not making bread you gotta be kidding me lunches pesto pasta avocado salad crab legs and they crack away like filthy little aliens the guests are

wondering if the stabilizer is broken. I appreciated that they were familiar with a large boat and how it can make it so that you don't want to vomit every four and a half seconds. Now what does that tell you? One of two things, they've either been on big boats before or they're fans of Below Deck. Oh, great point. I don't even know if being a fan of Below Deck would get you there. I think someone was in engineering. Okay. Well, Nate and Alicia are awkward and now the boat is very, very rocky. The new tender comes to stern. I was wondering, this is nighttime now, how does that guy get back? Great point. I think they have to drive him back. That sucks.

So we get to dinner. Todd says that he hunts peasants. Yeah, I think that was a little a little nod to the what film was it? Surviving the Game with ice tea. Yeah, where they this was the plot. They grab drug addict loser homeless people. Yeah, and then they put them out in the wilderness for rich people to hunt them Yeah, now listen peasants are just working-class people. I don't know that we need to take those people out, but

Listen if I hit the lotto somebody came knocked on my door said I have an opportunity for you had a gold case I was like, what are you? What are you doing with that gold case? He opens it there's a tiny little post-it note, and it says, I'm inviting you to go hunt bums. I'd be like, are you kidding me? I've been dreaming about this for five years. I am fucking in. How much does it cost? $15 million?

I just hit the lottery. Sure, it was 27 million, but I'm gonna do this. What's the price you could pay, you know? For bloodlust, yeah, exactly. So dinner is served and dinner is paused because Trevor has to get up and puke his guts out. Dinner is a coconut and lime leaf curry. And the second course is a local red snapper

with a green pea puree that looks like a kind of clumpy stomach bile. It looked like what came out of Seth. Yeah, yeah, yeah. If you could, you know, if you could you know kind of Put the humors of our body in a little bottle and then throw milk curds in there and just kind of see what happens That's what this green pea puree looked like absolutely disgusting for pots

these people these people We call mom after dinner and they they and they're not happy about dinner, right? Because they're very sick and they can't even eat. I have to tell you though, these charter guests are saints. They're so nice. I think it's the next morning this happens. They whisper how they're like unable to hold down food or eat and they're whispering so they don't offend the staff. Yeah, some bravo for next season. Let's get some monsters back. Okay, I feel like that was the season's been great. One of the

few things we've been lacking is a real group of assholes. I thought about that. I was like, what's missing this season or what are the components that make a great below deck season? You have to have at least two, three, I was gonna say three charter guests that are absolute fucking monsters yeah yeah yeah now they've been so nice but these people cannot sleep and they cannot eat and they're throwing up food that looks like throw up and they're paying exorbitant amounts of money for it okay all right so the guests once again are pretty pissed, but they're, they're nice about it. Nick had a bad dream about waking up and watching a movie and thinks that that

is a good idea for a movie. And it might be, but you, a lot more to, I think you got to fill that idea out. Um, this is where Laura and Serena have another little TIF. The walkie is not working properly. She misplaced her walkie talkie. Now Laura walks in and she's, you know, she's flustered. She's a little pissed off. And Serena is like, oh, here we go again, we're back. Serena, you misplaced your walkie.

She's pissed. Let it go. Okay, so Dilly. Let it go. You nailed it. OK, so this is less of Laura coming after her and more irritability based on the fact that everyone slept like they were

on that rocky amusement park ride that Dillon described earlier. So she's irritable. And you kind of did fuck up. The world is not ending here, Serena. Yeah, so we get ready for the beach set up. We've got two exposed islands it's all about timing and the tender will unfortunately be stuck for I don't know five minutes next episode and everything

is gonna happen yeah get in the comments let us know if you have survived any large falls or if you're a Sea Rat who is in a loving relationship we'll see you guys next week five stars kind words We'll read some reviews next week too. I'm Dylan saying goodbye. Pat say goodbye. Later dudes! Discover the exciting action of BedMGM Casino. and I'll see you next time. for terms and conditions. 19 plus to wage your Ontario only. Please gamble responsibly. If you have questions or concerns about gambling or someone close to you, please contact Connex Ontario at 1-866-531-2600 to speak to an advisor free of charge. Then MGM operates pursuant to an operating agreement

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