Another Below Deck Podcast - Chase Loves Boobs | Below Deck Sailing Yacht S4 E8

Episode Date: May 31, 2023

Dylan and Pat are back to breakdown dereliction of duty, America’s Got Talent, pretty privilege, Jigsaw, The Yardhouse, San Bernardino, tig ol’ bitties, the Amish, and much more from Bravo’s Bel...ow Deck Sailing Yacht Uncensored content and exclusive shows including Vanderpump Rules at Patreon.com/AnotherPodcastNetworkThis show is part of the Spreaker Prime Network, if you are interested in advertising on this podcast, contact us at https://www.spreaker.com/show/5727246/advertisement

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Starting point is 00:01:21 Only at Bartesian.com slash cocktail. That's B-A-R-T-e-s-i-a-n dot calm slash cocktail for parties and best deal ever only at parties and dot calm slash cocktail lucky for uh... lucky for Alex he has mad to flirt with about this entire thing you know he's going through a stressful time so he's got a uh... shoulder to cry on actually he doesn't because Gary is like the fucking jigsaw killer this season you don't know how to be everywhere he's like brutally murdering people because
Starting point is 00:01:49 he knows about crimes they've committed in the past so Gary sees that I play a game Gary sees no no no why did you ask it like that? I don't, sir! It's sir being the most terrifying little puppet I've ever seen. Get out of here. Okay, sorry. Welcome aboard another brand spanking episode of another below deck podcast my name is Dylan I'm settled up next to one Pat Hickey Hey permission to come aboard granted Kaelin. Hello. How you doing? I'm good. How long have we been going? I don't know, maybe like 12 seconds. A couple of seconds late on the start.
Starting point is 00:02:52 All right, so Kaylen's really coming into his own in the studio. You know, the chords are under the rug. Looks very professional in here, wouldn't you say? Very, very proud of our studio. But he's seeming to mess up on this clock thing quite often where we're four seconds behind, but listen, let's focus on the positive. He's been doing a great job.
Starting point is 00:03:13 And if you want to see his work, go to the bad TV YouTube channel. Okay, so Dylan, let's talk about the last episode. It got a little heated on your part. You were upset at the fans about not supporting us and Subscribing to YouTube now at the time I was a little concerned about your tone with the audience I was like boy, I hope he didn't upset anyone or they think we're mean or angry or we hate our listeners I'll put all that aside. I don't really give a shit because whatever you did it worked my friend We are nearly we are
Starting point is 00:03:45 kind of striking distance of a thousand subscribers on youtube and so let me uh... let me uh... wet their beaks a little bit okay so this might be something you might be interested in you know dilland was just referring to our studio and having a clock now and some of the cables are underneath the grunt of book of modern women behind me how would you like to see what kalen looks like and the studio with a little five minute little uh... a little tour of the studio and of course my finished pool
Starting point is 00:04:12 and uh... so if if if we haven't been able to get you there just to see our faces discussing this show at this point maybe we can get the air so you can see a little peak behind the scenes what if we chucked alley into the frame and it is a truck wake up awake or up right now out of her crib if i will get us to a thousand i will do it you can see a little peak behind the scenes. What if we chucked Ellie into the frame? I'm gonna do some trials. I'll go wake her up. I'll wake her up right now out of her crib. If I will get us to a thousand, I will do it. We need 60 more heroes to get us to a thousand subscribers
Starting point is 00:04:33 on YouTube. So head on over there right now. You'll get to see a behind the scenes tour of the studio. And again, we talked about the listenership. You know, Pat is an optimist and he does that through a false finnier to try to gain curry with the fans. I would say that it is pathetic the growth we've seen over the last week. It is a failure on your part. And if you are not paying us on Patreon, have not left review and have not subscribed to the YouTube channel. I will not be like last week and say you should be capital punished. I will just say, oh.
Starting point is 00:05:09 Oh and a little fun note. If you decide that Dylan was angry and you want to ding us a little bit with a one star review about what jerks we are, Dylan, I have a little ins with the people over at Apple Podcasts. Dylan utilized his new relationship with him to have one of your mean-spirited negative one-star reviews. Oh, listen, we have to get into the show. You can say whatever you want. You can say, let's see, I'm dumb. I am funny.
Starting point is 00:05:41 You can say I'm unfunny, but you cannot write to Famitory things about us say that we have to or we've been calling our audience a bunch of fuckers for that or something It was it was really to Famitory, but I don't want to get into the mock okay, okay We have a great episode of Bullock deck to get into And that's what we're gonna do Right now I think we should start off by asking Kaylyn what his pots are thoughts and knots, which is the episode Kaylyn. Oh, I thought it was rather boring for the most part, but I did think that it ended quite well. I thought that brought it back a little bit. I'll give it 13 knots. I thought
Starting point is 00:06:23 he was going to be more optimistic. Wow, I couldn't disagree more, but Dylan, why don't I hand it off to you? Why don't I hand it right back? Fine. I thought this was an amazing episode. This was one of those episodes that is working its way up to that crest of the end of the season. Right, right, right. I mean, it had everything. It's Babber's Alan, really shitty take.
Starting point is 00:06:46 Okay, let's talk about something, an exercise on this show that is typically pointless, of pointless five minutes of television. That's poking, parking the damn boat. Yeah. What a harrowing parking of that boat. In past episodes, you had that lead character, yelling like a god damn toddler that wants more pudding.
Starting point is 00:07:05 Like, get out of my way! Not Glenn, measured. That parking that ball. That was a great toddler impression. That was like trying to fit in those paragines that you wore in years when you were much younger. And now it's your fit into these since grade 11. And you squeeze into them, but your balls are being squished.
Starting point is 00:07:24 That was my turn. Because it's age or your balls have gotten bigger as it have to do for men of a certain age are you talking about balls right now did you know that balls it's like a ball camel toe that's what this parking in the boat was he got it in there but it was so tight it had a camel yeah I'm talking about it before or men of a certain age can shit on their balls um oh I'm not done. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Gary, our resident sex addict, boy, a true testament to a sex addict and their resolve.
Starting point is 00:07:53 He can finally work for this son of a bitch. Yeah, what? Interesting. He got mad to come to him and then crawl in his bed. Yeah, yeah, yeah. She was disgusted by him most of this episode and the several of the past episodes, yet she came crawling to our resident sex addicts. Fuck.
Starting point is 00:08:11 Right, right, right, man. And then finally the episode crested with the Colin Daisy hookup, a long time coming, three seasons of sexual tension, finally getting there, and then Colin telling poor Matt, oh, actually ordering her to go fuck Gary and get out of it. Sure, sure, sure. Wonderful episode.
Starting point is 00:08:29 Kaelin, you're so wrong. 90 knots. Yeah. That's a good thing. Yeah, so we did have the end of this episode was kind of like a Scooby-Doo hallway of C-Rat sets. You know what I mean? But tonight, sadly, we found out how bravo's public relations department uses us as their own weapon. We were given an interview with Chase. Great guy. Took the punches. Said he got a sailboat. I said, that sounds exhausting. He wasn't offended. We've marked
Starting point is 00:09:18 him in the past. He was a great sport about the entire thing. What did our fans say? Ah, they turned on him. Best C-rad interview ever. Yeah. Nice this guy, need this guy in your team. And what does he do tonight? Well, he, he perpetuated a, a stereotype of Americans, of being loud, obnoxious and gross.
Starting point is 00:09:38 Thank you. Bad outing from Chase, and a bad outing from Gary, dare I say we're getting two creeps at the core of this episode. But like I said, the season is humming and listen to chase was um you know, you know, you know, I mean, you're a nice guy when we talk to you. Hey, Dylan, do you want to be judged on your worst day? Am I right? Well, I was probably last week, yeah, I mean. I mean.
Starting point is 00:10:07 Forgiven, forget, you know what I mean? Well, I mean. Hey, Chase, don't do that anymore. You can't be telling a girl that you want to call a big, old lady. You can't say gold in her ass, people, that you work with, Chase. I mean, that's just fucking out of bounds.
Starting point is 00:10:19 Yeah, come on, man. Come on, man. 80 pots. So let's sail. Yes. We pick up sailing. Yeah, no, no, no, no, no, no. We start the episode sailing, but I thought it would be like a fun kind of thing to sail like getting into the episode moving forward. You know what I mean? Oh, obviously.
Starting point is 00:10:45 Go ahead. Well, I was going to say Colin is in that engine room and you know They are sailing and Colin radio's up to Captain Glenn and he says and I quote everything is amazing Yeah, well there was smoke coming out of the rear of the boat 10 minutes ago So why don't we just say that we achieved not burning anybody alive at the moment? Well, you know how I was saying that that let's sail thing I was going to do every episode moving forward would be like kind of a super fun thing. Sailing is not. Not at all, Dylan.
Starting point is 00:11:15 Sailing is not bad-ass contrary to Jim. It's pure horror. There are knives and dough and blood everywhere and Jim and the gang are just looking at the sun, you know, the people that watch this show know the Glenn is Getting his yai yai's out until he can end another chart or season now parse a full Glenn says has been giving them a run for their money Which is quite euanistic language to use, because you've brought it up in the past, run for their money kind of also means like, I had a possible like a death vehicle for a lot of paying gas, youenanigans. You've been saying that like, let's say hypothetically speaking,
Starting point is 00:12:06 they get stuck in between three concurrent sets of waves that all converge in one moment. The perfect storm. Yes. What happens if the engine is on the fritz? If they are in the middle of said three ways converging, you'd ever run for your money. Everybody will die. Yeah, Glenn, not to be a dick to you, but you do note that this is the biggest problem, the most problems you've had in 30 years of chartering
Starting point is 00:12:36 or whatever. Maybe it might have something to do with a very busy schedule, Hawking Salami. I just wanna say, little less safety checks. Hey, there's some Salami you should buy. Glenn, the two things go hand in hand. individual hawking salami i just want to say little less safety checks hey there's some salami you should buy glend the two things go hand in hand yeah dereliction of duty sir you're going to get people killed right right there's an obsession with work of door dash and call a slaughtering horse takes
Starting point is 00:12:59 up a lot of your mental space uh... and i didn't need to use that word sex workers real work uh... can you please write down run for their money as a title possibly for the episode? You know what I was thinking about Glenn and you know, obviously he does kill people with not to get ahead of myself, but when Alicia was vomiting in the toilet and she headed back to that boat, I was like, we all had the same note. She's gonna walk in there and he's gonna be having like a double bag and he's putting a head in it and she walks in and is like Captain Glenn and what happens to what happens to a
Starting point is 00:13:31 bowing ball. He said it's a bowing ball and she buys it. What right. Who would have a bowling ball on a yacht. Well now there's a little bit of an issue with this hypothetical. Obviously I felt the same way as many of our fans. When Alicia left to go home, our fans probably were watching, thinking, oh no, she's going to go back to horror again. Glenn is very, very careful with his work. He usually processes off-site. You don't want to shit. Where are you eating? Or process bodies where you eat. But every once in a while, he does have to bring back
Starting point is 00:14:10 perhaps a limb that did not corrode properly and dispose of it. You know, in this case, it's a head. In this case, it's a head. It could have been really bad. But we put on, we plan a talent show. And not to be a cyniker, anything, but they cut to last years with the said context
Starting point is 00:14:31 of how are we gonna top this? And they cut to it. It is Colin doing a bad to the bone cover and Gary taking off his shirt. Well, let's paint a picture with Gary taking off his shirt. It was fresh off a sig break. And he was exposing his son ravaged chest reading thank you for a great charter how are you going to talk that
Starting point is 00:14:50 no idea how i don't know how i don't know that well there's some odd to daisy and call you feel the sexual chemistry brewing the breadcrumbs are little too loud i would say which begs the question, were they porking before the charter? I don't have a crystal ball, but I'm going to say 100%. Probably. So Daisy says she is a very talentless person, which is obvious because she's a seerat. Too mean? Not at all. I was, I had this. No, I'm kidding, Daisy, very talented. The jig was beautiful.
Starting point is 00:15:26 Yeah, absolutely. It was the best part of the whole show. What is talent? Good. Well, I was going to. I had this funny thought of like America's got talent. You know, like Simon Cowles. They were like, El McPherson and how we Mandela or something. And Gary walks out on a stool. He just lights up a cigarette. Yeah, yeah. And Kyle Simon Cow Carl is like, what is your talent? Well, no, no, so I'm gonna smoke a cigarette.
Starting point is 00:15:49 So this is what happens, right? So he's on stash, and he comes out there, and he's fucking sunburnt to smother it. He healing. And he lights up a cigarette, and people are confused. Simon hits the buzzer. He's not going through in Simon's book. But how are the rest of the gang say, wait, what if there's more? And all of a sudden, broken women start walking on stage. And just kind of stay next to the stool. They bypass security. It was a very odd thing. And they all buzzed no two to but they're very confused about what they saw all right so the the meanwhile continues there's walk around like board zombies don't don't book these chart there's a
Starting point is 00:16:36 lot of stuff in the beginning of the episode to caillin's credit but yeah so but but then we get some real juice, some real tea, some real meat. So the meanwhile continues, Chase and Alex, the feud begins. Lucky talks about making her boobs move one at a time and they rehearse their jig. Now we cut to a woman named Marnie getting on an efoil and this is when I'm realizing I don't want overly nice guests on long charters. Things are going too good. There's nothing daytime worthy about these people.
Starting point is 00:17:14 It's just good vibes, good fun in the sun. Jim's pretty annoying. Jim, you're probably listening. Most charter guests listen. They want to hear if we're going to talk about you. Jim, I hate to say this, but when you're talking for 10 minutes, making all those old, essentially kind of dad jokey things, and no one laughs, shut the fuck up.
Starting point is 00:17:32 You're not entertaining anybody, you're annoying people. I mean, that can ruin a vacation. Just someone talking like, has he noticed I haven't laughed at a single thing he said 10 minutes? There's that thing though, with the dad jokes, and then there's that other thing where you crawl on the floor like a dog and scare people who you don't know. That's really bizarre thing to do. Don't do that. Jim, you're gonna have to stop that. Okay, I'm gonna talk to
Starting point is 00:17:54 Marnie. Hey, one thing I do want to back up to. So when Gary Colin, Gary and Colin chat about Alex, they have a harsh criticism for him, which is he's so good looking. Things just come to him. P.P. Pretty privilege. Is that what it is? And I thought, yes, that's true. Also rich people, super rich people never get told, they never get told no.
Starting point is 00:18:17 Right. I was gonna quickly, if you don't mind, share that story of where one time I parked in front of a mansion and a rich lady came out of her mansion and she asked me to move my car off the street. Yeah, that's happening to me too. Oh really? Yeah, with wealthy people.
Starting point is 00:18:29 And I said, well, I'm working at your neighbor's house, she said, well, park in front of his house. And I said, well, it's a public street, man. And she said, well, I'd like you to move and then I threw a dinger at her. I said, okay, when you throw a party, where do your friends park? And she said, well, I have plenty of room.
Starting point is 00:18:45 And I said, look, I'm not gonna get in semantics with you. Go on your house and stare at a wall. And she was shocked. And I said that to her, she was shocked. It was like I told her that I just told her I wanted to kill her entire family. Lady, go on the house and stare at a wall.
Starting point is 00:18:58 She's like, oh, dear you. Yeah, she was like, are you from Massachusetts? You have certain width to you. No, I'm like the same thing. You people tell you to move and you go, no. And they go, I'm gonna call someone. You go, good luck. Call them.
Starting point is 00:19:13 Good luck. And then your wife goes, you're too confrontational. So we move on to Chase being frustrated with Gary's managerial tactics. And here we have our first real hardy piece of meat of the episode. Oh, yes. Now Chase blocks with Gary's managerial tactics. And here we have our first real hardy piece of meat of the episode. Oh, yes. Now Chase blocks at Gary's managerial status
Starting point is 00:19:29 because it makes Chase look like a fucking backstabbing little roly-poly, you know what I mean? And I agree with that. Chase wants to handle this mono-amano, like a real badass, you know what I mean? Clint Eastwood on the porch, saying to the mungs to get away from his private property, you know what I mean? Now this is what I don't know what that one. I don't know what I did there. Oh, yeah
Starting point is 00:19:50 Well, I was just thinking like Clint Eastwood like you know dirty hairy kind of badass But then he decayed into a real lunatic at the end of his life, you know what I mean speaking to the empty chair and whatnot Oh, how about that last movie what El macho or whatever? Oh, yeah Where he is proposition of a threesome with two young Latin American women things that would never happen but in the mind of an old man writing yeah way too long into his years like that pierced brawston movie where he uh... he gets to be in a polyamorous relationship with two younger latina women and it's like written directed by pierced bra. Smart move, dude.
Starting point is 00:20:25 Well, all right. So let's break this down, because this is one of the juicier parts of the episode. Oh, yeah. It's a real hardy piece for me. This is where Gary confronts Alex about the boat looking bad and basically puts words in Chase's mouth, makes up shit. Gary, this is where he dips his toes into villain territory.
Starting point is 00:20:41 Up until this point, he's been on the show as the lovable sex addict and womanizer. Now he's a lying and in doing and creating workplace stride yeah he's a primordial bitch this season he is completely overwhelmed by his shadows and he has no idea what's going on um i believe he said just for context i believe he said out uh... tell the Alex that uh... chase had said that he thought he was lazy well yeah and he does it like a fourteen year old and there's this thing where i i was like chased
Starting point is 00:21:12 i was reminded when gary sat down with alix um... the gary's pretty good at a job including uh... reprimanding people managing people when they're not women when they're women he he struggles because he wants to have sex with them very badly clouds everything but if it's a guy it's okay until this season because he's going along he's going along he's going along it's
Starting point is 00:21:36 all very professional it's all very managerial it's all very good good Gary and then he goes yeah because you know chase said you were a lazy piece of shit and i was like he you were a lazy piece of shit, and I was like, he's not a lazy piece of shit. Well, Dylan, you nailed it. And I was like, Gary, that's a nasty, little primordial bitchy thing to do. You are the cowardly, roly-poly, sir. Now we loved Gary, who's always been a pig,
Starting point is 00:21:59 but he's a hardworking pig as you pointed out. And a straight chute and pig. But now he's in the mud. Right, yeah, yeah, Yeah. So this works perfectly. It's a real communist like move. Alex is unfairly in his head, feeling like he's in a den of snakes. Chase is completely eloof about the fervent hatred his ally has for him now. And Gary is going to keep applying mad with liquor and thrusting his red, red body atop her. Not before he attempts to cock block Alex I believe Alex and mad's were having a conversation
Starting point is 00:22:29 in the bar area and that's when Gary makes a cock. Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, let's not get a hat of ourself. That doesn't happen here. Break this down. Okay. Hey, do you have self-care resolutions in 2023? Yes, I do. Yeah, of course you do. You're not a loser. Right. Right. You know how you could be better this year? Tell me Dylan. Well, I think you know, let me put it to you this way. In 2023, do you want to be flaky or flake free? No. Just tell me if you want to be flakey or flake free. I want to be flake free. And that is why Pat uses way. Use it all the time. And by all the time, what do you mean? Because I've heard conflicting things about shampooing protocol, not with way. Use it as much as you want. Or as little as you want.
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Starting point is 00:27:48 You know, he's gone through a stressful time. So he's got a shoulder to cry on. Actually, he doesn't because Gary is like the fucking jigsaw killer this season. You don't know how he'd be everywhere. He's like brutally murdering people because he knows about crimes they've committed in the past so gary c's that
Starting point is 00:28:08 gary c's no no i know why did you ask it like that i don't sir it's sir being the most terrifying little puppet i've ever seen get out of here okay sorry little puppet I've ever seen. Get out of here. Okay, sorry. Gary sees that Madsen Alex are flirting and rusts himself into the conversation. There are some dumb hijacking going on right now in his brain because he is overwhelming and
Starting point is 00:28:40 creepy. He pulls her away from Alex, takes her out and leans against the boat like Kinniki, just more sun-damaged, and says, so what do you want out of this? Gary, Gary You want first you right but two this is a very dumb question you have been trafficking in the The games of love and warfare with sea rats for many many years you know that this is a stupid question You know that this means nothing at your entire Modisapparanda why are you asking this woman what this is going to be? He may know it, but he can't control himself. This is a sex addict.
Starting point is 00:29:30 Oh my God. Honestly, if Mads was talking to Zach Alex, and Gary saw that, and on the other part of the room. His mother's in, I don't know if it if Pitt Sand or Quick Sand exists. Oh shit. But in that empty hole with all the syringes The jigsaw killer. I was at well if we want to keep with that
Starting point is 00:29:49 Yeah, yeah, I was one of my mothers in there with hypodermic needles and then he's seen yeah talking out Where does he go? He can only has one minute to either try and fuck mad or save his mother for me Stabbed death by hypodermic needles Yeah, my money my Vegas money is on him going to Mads. This is my this is my bad, right? So he goes to Mads and he had sex with her and it takes like 15 minutes mom's dead by her own Inertia, she's swimming to try to get out. That's what so insidious about that trap and In Irshah she's swimming to try to get out. That's what so insidious about that trap and
Starting point is 00:30:27 Gary Says in a craft fallen OTF. I thought I could do both He really thought he could only say a point person So um we what this is I don't understand the obsession with her. You just says later in the episode, he tells Colin who's not buying any of his bullshit. He's like, I think I'm falling in love with. Right. Exactly. Which is what's so confusing about the sex addiction claim.
Starting point is 00:30:55 Obviously, he's a sex addict, but I don't think that sex addiction makes you possessive. Like something's going on. 100% it does. Oh, it does. He must have her. He must have her. And once he does, he'll get bored with her. Oh he hasn't had her yet.
Starting point is 00:31:08 He has not. Ah, no, no. Once he does, he'll be bored. That makes sense. Because yeah, Colin literally laughs at him when he says that he's, when he speaks on love. Colin asks if he's joking.
Starting point is 00:31:18 All right, let's get to dinner. Seafood extravaganza. Common thing aboard this vessel. Because people equate seafood with wealth. People equate raw bar to wealth. And yeah, it can be if it's not crudely defrosted the way it is on parciful. You know what I mean? No, I'm kidding, Alicia.
Starting point is 00:31:46 You probably got fresh scallops. We'll have you on, kid. Kind of. Yeah, we'll have you on right before you try to stab Daisy with a butcher's knife. And you'll be great. All right, so dinner is lobsters with burnt lemon. We get Greek salad. We also have bacon topped scallops and the most yard house
Starting point is 00:32:11 Southern California Of all of the dishes lobster mac and cheese with truffle oil that is that is a A is a, a, a sorter. If there was this kind of dystopian sorter of people, the ones that could do good things in the world and the ones that certainly cannot, just ask them if they want the lobster mac and cheese with truffle oil or not, and then a trapdoor opens.
Starting point is 00:32:40 Now Tim Dillon did the funniest rant on Yard House, because Yard House is a very, very specific restaurant. Do you ever been to a Yard House tale? I don't think so. Okay, well, Tim Dillon was talking about how it's food you've heard of. It's just like spicy tuna tacos, corn dogs, cheeseburgers. I'm gonna stop talking about it because again, it's micro regional and We don't need to talk about it. I thought it was a great dinner though. Oh, you did what how many pots you give it for nice
Starting point is 00:33:16 So um, let's get to the talent show. Mm-hmm. Glenn tells the joke and the proceedings begin Well, the joke was great. I do want to point out chase starts out. He tries to set I guess What is it people's perception of perception there uh... who gives a shit chase lets us know he can't juggle and he can't sing but he can short-laced and god damn pipe his work is a piece of the lot i heard he's the only person to survive the side gone side splitter now no no i we paid him too much last week to edit that. I don't want to get into it.
Starting point is 00:33:46 It's killed like eight people. I bet. Yeah. It sounds dangerous. And it sounds like it's something that people are going to have to do a goog on because we are not going to be paying for it. It involves a large stront of Bukkaki party. Okay. Don't try it without a fan belt and a lot of plastic.
Starting point is 00:34:02 A lot of plastic? Yeah, you want lot of plastic. Okay. A lot of plastic? Yeah, you want to cover yourself. Okay. Well, if you're trying to do a public service, a public work, so to speak, you can't be so vague. I mean, what people are going to go out and buy a bunch of buckets for sand castles. That's plastic. A bunch of ziploc bags.
Starting point is 00:34:24 That's plastic. But what they need is a kind of like tarp like material. Exactly, sorry. Right. You wanna get to this house? They protect them from the splatter of what? We're at a buccacchi part. Oh, it's come. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:34:40 That's so stupid. It killed eight people. That is so fucking dumb. It's so low brow too. Really? Oh my god, it's so blue. It killed eight people. That is so fucking dumb. It's so low brow too. Really? Oh my god, it's so blue. All right So the C-Ret's dance it's a very fun natured event because Jim is
Starting point is 00:34:54 He's a Jim's the best I will say though quite it a lot of what do you call them vignettes. There's a very long deal. Yeah, that was that was the only bad part of the episode. Actually, I think a little too much time planning it being nervous about it.
Starting point is 00:35:17 It happening. Yeah. Daisy says Collins very cute. I know for the breadcrumb's problem. I mean, my god. Mm-hmm. Come on. All right, we gotta get to the next day.
Starting point is 00:35:28 Next day. So Alex did not stop moving all night and it's drop off day. And this is when Jim hits the deck for a little dog crawl. Acute the old man dog crawl where you go around the back of the bar and you scare two young women who are working in many skirts
Starting point is 00:35:45 I want to let the audience know in our current climate if Jim did any of this bullshit where he wasn't paying people He'd be fired from his job. You can't do that. He rubbed a Lockies feet. Yeah, that's not you can't do that unless you're paying someone right and. And you can't scare two people. Right, right. Give someone a goddamn heart attack. Yeah. Jim drives me nuts. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:36:11 Yeah. You know when you're driving to, you know, San Bernardino. Mm-hmm. You see 15 billboards, like a suit, Jim, for that kind of thing. You know what I mean? And I know I shouldn't continue down the micro regional path, but I got to say, you know, on our way to that Chitol Big Bear a couple of weeks ago, we had a path through San Bernardino, one of the
Starting point is 00:36:36 most disgusting places in the continental capital of crystal meth math telling. It is a horror show. You pull off the freeway and there is, not an encampment, but a city. A city of zombies and then you go into a Wendy's because you have to go to a bathroom. First you go into the CDS and ask if you can use the bathroom. They say, we don't have a bathroom anymore. I go, okay, I understand.
Starting point is 00:37:05 You drive across to the Wendy's, they have a security code that must be administered by a manager because, I mean. I think this thing I'm about to say might say it all about San Perdino in your perception. Breaking bad was supposed to take place in San Bernardino, but the tax loopholes were as wide as New Mexico.
Starting point is 00:37:30 Right, right, right. Yeah, that's what we're supposed to take place. Yeah, yeah, yeah. This guy wouldn't let me in. I was trying to merge and I was like, I better not do what I'd usually do. All right, so anyways, C-Dog and Gary have a little chat. Anything on this? This
Starting point is 00:37:46 is where he laughs at him, I think. Yeah, he said he laughs at it. And he says he's a stage five cleaner. All right, let's get to a tight fit. And by tight fit, we saw the overhead. I would say physical impossibility. The only reason why this docking was good is because Captain Glenn literally says, we're 11 feet wide and we have a nine foot or 11 foot, I know it's meters, whatever. We're 11, it's nine. That means something has to go wrong.
Starting point is 00:38:18 At the very least we're gonna see something go wrong. And we kind of did, we saw little scrapies, but that's why you have the boat pillows Somebody hang the boat pillows over the side. Here's my problem I know the guests aren't staying overnight on the dock But maybe some of those other people in the smaller boats that are flanking them on their either side of them get a tender What are you doing this for you could you could fucking hand your neighbor in the other boat a beer without getting off the chair.
Starting point is 00:38:47 That's how fucking close. You burp and someone say like, excuse me, did you eat pizza? Like that's how close they are. Oh, and you know what, Patrick? You know how in Los Angeles, it's kind of a cardinal sin to park over the line. I mean, it's much more stressful in these waters
Starting point is 00:39:03 because there are no lines that clearly indicate whether or not your piece of shit or not. It gets a little bit more murky out here. You know, I walked out, this is a couple years ago, I walk out and my car was clearly over the parking line. Yeah. And a guy says to me, did you park like that? Yeah, yeah.
Starting point is 00:39:20 He was being provocative trying to start a fight. Good question, good question. And I said, I did. And then he like made a face And I said because some other asshole before I parked yeah had parked over the line on the other side right right right That's not relinquishing an available parking spot. I chose this is what you got to say to these people and you say it verbatim You say yeah with somebody else. So I had to shuffle over you know, man This kind of scenarios like a game of quantum dominos. You have no idea which one is hitting the other, but it is an effect.
Starting point is 00:39:51 So you can't come at people like this because you just never know. You never know. You never know. By the way, when I gave him what was a very satisfying explanation, he still just like made a face like it didn't make any sense. So I'm like, fuck you! Yeah, yeah. Just stand a wall! Ha ha ha ha! All right, let's get to... like it didn't make any sense. So I'm like, fuck you! Yeah, yeah. Gustavo! Oh!
Starting point is 00:40:07 All right, let's get to. Tip. Tip. All right, guys, you're confusing the hell out of me. The first off, sorry, Pat. We're a toast from Jim. What did he say? He said it's a very sweet thing.
Starting point is 00:40:20 He said, I'd love you. And then they handed the envelope and said, they're all ones. I was gonna go to a strip club or something. Oh, yes. Oh, man. Oh, no, then he gives the premise. I think it's before they leave, which I very irritating on Jim's part. He asked Daisy, Hey, if you're gonna exile any of your co-workers to the island and let me replace him, who would you do it? And if I were her, I would have been like, honestly, Jim, you're pretty annoying. We probably put put you on the island I know that's a tough way to answer the question.
Starting point is 00:40:49 You know Jim I after tonight I'd say probably Chase but the problem with that is that you would probably say the same thing that Chase said to Lucky next time because now you're one of us and then you're even more gross. Yes. Now I feel bad harping on Jimmy. No no he's annoying. You're even though you're nice you're even more gross. Yes. Now, I feel bad harping on Jamie. No, no, he's annoying. You, even though you're nice, you're still very annoying. Well, speaking of nice and annoying, nice and sexually harassing, let's get to chase.
Starting point is 00:41:14 He, oh, well, first what's the tip? Oh, so they split it up in USD and then Euros for the breakdown. It was $27.5, American dollars, and then they broke it down in Euros.. It was 2700 euros. I don't know why they did that Why are you so thrown by this? Well, what every time this happens you're like Unbelievable that they they're doing this double currency thing. It's really jacking me up It was a good tip though very good tip. I mean they earned it. He was very annoying It was a good tip though. Very good tip. I mean, they earned it.
Starting point is 00:41:43 He was very annoying. Okay. All right. So speaking of nice people who were annoying. Yes, let's talk about Chase. Okay. Now Chase begins the evening with that kind of energy that, I mean, we told the two of his face,
Starting point is 00:42:03 we can see why people are very annoyed with him. It's too much, it's too happy. The world is a punishing place in kind of the death rattle of late stage global capitalism. Nobody should be anywhere near as happy as Chase. I'm not saying to be miserable, but this is, we're not in the garden of Eden. Just take your beer bong and be quiet or about it. God dammit, man.
Starting point is 00:42:38 Yeah, I believe he referred to Lucky's address as some big old titties. Yeah, big old titties. Yeah, big old titties and he'll make, well, we'll get to dinner. Sure. Because he'll remain fixated on those take old bitties for some time. But we have to get in the cars and Gary hops in the one with the girls because he's very annoyed by chase
Starting point is 00:43:07 fortunately for uh... unfortunately for the girls they are now going to be annoyed by gary and gary does just that pat what does he say to the girls well i think he uh... he tells him what the other guys think about each one of them individually as far as the retraction right right right. Yeah, I think he thinks Daisy's painting the ass. I think Alicia has a boyfriend and I think he calls someone ugly or looks like a man. Who's he, what's he say to a lucky?
Starting point is 00:43:36 Yeah, well, well, he tells Daisy, sorry, sorry, I was in my head a little bit and I was thinking about shitting on you for how bad of a job that you did. I didn't tell him that. But I didn't know. I just said Gary's being a dick. Okay.
Starting point is 00:43:55 But yeah, no, he says that he's very, very eloquent. He says that everybody wants to fuck Daisy, but they're too scared of her. Um, he says that, uh, lucky's like, um, yeah, you said it like a, like a, looks like a guy. Yeah, like a fucking guy looking at all guy like, you know, and then he tells the leash at that, um, you know, it sucks that she's not single. He says something about Mads. I think he says, uh, I'm in love with you. I'd like to have sex with you tonight or something like that.
Starting point is 00:44:28 Do you see how good of a job I did? Spectacular. Yeah. And then he attempts to step out of the van. Yeah. God, I wish you got hit. I don't want him to die right now. Oh, Patrick.
Starting point is 00:44:38 I just wanted to be like, you know, kind of go airborne for a little bit like a flying squirrel. That's crazy to wish on people. Oh, you're right. I don't know. Because let's play that out. I mean, I was thinking that you would say at least clipped and even clipped.
Starting point is 00:44:51 You know, if you're clipped at 25 miles an hour, let's say in the forearm, you've got a compound fracture. Oh, not on that. You lose your shoes. So it's thrown from a vehicle and they find the body like, oh, his shoes are over there. They're not on his feet No, they're like a mile away Yeah, yeah, that's crazy. That happened. Yeah
Starting point is 00:45:18 You know Evidently Evidently, you know, I was fed this because I'm a boy living in Los Angeles. I really just a boy anywhere. I mean, they're taking over the world, but the Avan and Shane Gillis were talking about how the Amish are frequently run over by big, big trucks on the road because they're in a horse and buggy. And sometimes they go on the shoulder and they obliterate them Very sad yeah, even the horse's shoes I bet come off and those are nailed in oh
Starting point is 00:45:57 My god Can you imagine the horror? I don't think I won't do this anymore. That's not that all truck drivers selling. Hey, I think I found a, no, it's a half. It's a half. So large puck of bone over here. All right, we have to get into the fucking show. All right, sorry.
Starting point is 00:46:19 So that was my fault. All right, we get to dinner, Alicia Vomits and she heads back. And yeah, we joked at the things that she could witness, although I would say given the careful practice of Glenn, the likelihood of her stumbling into something, uh, sweetie Todd like, um, can you imagine Glenn's in a wig when he does it? Um, but if it was Lee, she's pleasureing himself in the, the crew mass. Lee? Excuse me! Get out of here!
Starting point is 00:47:13 He's got that Maori tattoo on his chest. I pray that has nothing to do with the sun. That's the saddest thing. Oh, no, no. All right. So Chase then begins with the sexual harassment. He asks Lucky if he can boob-lush tequila out of her big old titties. And she does a great impression of him. She's like, my name's Chase and I love boobs. It's just like, you know, we're going to be together. of her big old titties. And she does a great impression of him. She's like, my name's Chase and I love boobs.
Starting point is 00:47:48 And it's just like, you know, men and women have their different plates. They're a gender-specific annoyances. But at the top of the list, I'm just very grateful that we're not accosted by annoying, horny guys. It just must be such an annoying, uncomfortable thing to go through. You know, I will say this, it does happen
Starting point is 00:48:09 from the opposite sex. When I was a younger man, I didn't know I was being sexually harassed when I worked on the set of Alimic Beale. There were makeup artists and a hair person, they were probably 40, and they used to like grab my ass and stuff. I didn't know what to do. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:48:24 Kaelin. is that right? Oh, I mean Hey, go do you got it? No All right, maybe we'll cut that can you mark that? All right, so yeah, he begins with this sexual harassment. And when she does this impression, like, oh, I'm Chase, I love boobs. It's so perfect because it's this thing where it's like, everyone loves boobs.
Starting point is 00:48:59 Everybody loves boobs. You don't get to just go around propositioning people, doing tequila li�us, to do tequila li�us out of boobs because you like boobs. You don't get to just go around propositioning people. Doing tequila liuzas, to do tequila liuzas out of boobs because you like boobs. You know, you have to have a little bit of restraint. There are certain asks that need a relational foundation before you you ask them. You know, you can go up to a stranger and ask for directions. You cannot go up to a
Starting point is 00:49:23 stranger and go, hey, I need your help killing someone. That's not an okay thing to do. It'd be kind of like what Chase did. Is she essentially a stranger? What I'm saying is it's inappropriate. Here's what I'll say. I hope Chase watches that episode and now has an opportunity to reflect on his behavior.
Starting point is 00:49:42 We had home. And Alex hits on the girls in a much more clever way, though still very sloppy to the lucid eye. He's in the car and he's like, he's hearing complaints of Chase and he goes, yeah, I mean, you guys do have amazing tits, but it's not like he needs to go about it that way. They're like thank you Alex.
Starting point is 00:50:08 Now, this is where we get to the Scooby-Doo Hall of C-Rat Love. We've got Mads and Gary. They do a little dance, right? They go to the MasterCats. It's musical chairs at this point. Yeah, a lot of people on the moot. Bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap,
Starting point is 00:50:28 bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, And that's when Colin and Chase Kind of easy. Oh Colin and Daisy. Yes. That's how they ended up in the stairwell with each other I thought let's go look for Gary. I thought it was Colin and I chase correct me if I'm wrong But I believe that's how they found themselves in a stairwell All right, well they walk in there right and they bust in mads is really bummed out you can tell mads is like We almost got off and mads is said I'm fucking horny. I'd be pissed off at Colin Very very very do that very college roommate dorm bullshit 100% 100% You know Someone walked in on me in college
Starting point is 00:51:23 You many different times. But one time I was, you know, people do it, people masturbate. And it was one of those delusional, kind of like, wool blankets I felt like I was in. I just felt completely safe, completely comfortable. So I, for some reason, I mean, it sounds absurd, and I don't know why I'm saying this into a mic,
Starting point is 00:51:47 but I got completely naked to do this. And that's a completely unnecessary thing. It's like somebody pulling their pants all the way down to use a urinal. You were asking for it. Room mate walked in. He didn't even shut the door. He just started laughing.
Starting point is 00:52:05 So anyways, Daisy and Colin. Finally, it did feel like it kind of came out of nowhere. They just, they look at each other's eyes on the stairwell. They begin making out. And four seconds later, they're trying to find a bed to enter each other. Right, right, right. Which is where it's this thing where it's like, and I've said that so many times tonight, I don't know why I keep saying that, but it's this thing, right? Where either the tension was so palpable and so often winked at by both of them,
Starting point is 00:52:42 that they just ravaged one another or they were at Marcos's restaurant in late 2022 and they hooked up one night and they've been like giggly about it ever so. Very likely. Very likely. All right. Join us on YouTube about TV. Also in your feed this week, you're going to get an episode one of season one of below deck OG. Take that. Mm-hmm. Fuckers. Getting the iTunes writing to your review is the five stars kind of words. And we love you guys very much.
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