Kill James Bond! - Communal Pilaf | Below Deck S10 E10

Episode Date: February 2, 2023

Pat and Dylan are back to break down another brand spanking new episode of Bravo's Below Deck. We talk pilaf, holes, Cameron Crowe, knives, Beaker, horrors, demons, how Alissa might be evil, how Ross likely is evil, how Sandy is snapping and much more from Bravo's Below Deck. OUR NEW SHOW BAD TV IS LIVE AND WE'RE COVERING LOVE AFTER LOCKUP! - Subscribe right here: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/bad-t-v/id1193077828The full season of Below Deck Down Under recaps is ALREADY available only on our Patreon at https://Patreon.com/AnotherPodcastNetworkAlso available is our coverage of Below Deck Sailing and Love is Blind seasons 1 and 2 for both shows!Check out our merch!https://anothermerchstore.com

I mean, you know, we've covered it, but let's just call a demon a demon. People are starting to make her feel like it was her fault. And she's getting emotionally worn down by that kind of wordless insinuation that she feels from Ben and others on the boat. And I would argue that it's not them, it's your conscience. You remember that thing that you felt for seven and a half minutes last episode? Let that thing up for air, man. My God. Hi, hello, and welcome to another Brand Spanking New episode of... Oh, I'm supposed to say welcome aboard, I think, right?

Yeah, that's what you do. Listen, it's been a... The board, you know, now that we're sharing the studio, we've really got to tell these people that things need to get put back. Studio etiquette, dude. Put things back where they are. Yeah. Can you imagine you walk in your kitchen?

I just, I'm trying to relate this to people that don't do a podcast and you open up the fucking knife drawer and there's no knives in there. And you're like, what the fuck? You know, I'm addicted to nicotine. Yes. I'm worried that the... And we'll get into the show. One second.

I'm worried that the benefits of staving off cognitive decline are not working on me because I have lived in my place of residence for a year and a half. I'll go to a cabinet and it'll honestly be like a mystery door game and i'm wrong most of the time how do i not know that this is filled with with mugs how do i not know that the glasses are in there it's just crazy hey have a daughter she

likes to hide my fucking phone on me i come home i'm like honey did you see where i put my phone she's like i think ellie had it ellie had it's two. Why are you letting her hold my phone? And we cover the demonic evolution of your two-year-old daughter on Patreon. So go to patreon.com slash another podcast network. Speaking of Patreon, ad-free episodes. No Pechanga Casino resort ads. No rocket money. No strange Chinese malware in the form of some kind of fun game that you play when you're driving on the freeway none of that stuff the real selling point the

real selling point is that you know every once in a while and this isn't really the show to plug what what is the we're gonna do Oh, that's the real selling point. Come on, it's fun. And we're having a lot of fun with it this time. I promise. We're going to be very positive and not negative nannies at all. Ninnies? Ninnies.

The plug to me was this isn't the show that we usually have to beep. You know, we're on pretty good behavior when we do the show. But there are certain properties that the subject matter just brushes us up against some you know unsavory speak so sometimes there is a little beeping if you want to listen to uncensored content go to patreon.com slash another podcast network people have been clamoring for this stuff and i don't know. Why do you want to think less of us? Because the things that we say, they're not good. But you can hear all of them at patreon.com.

So we have to get into this episode. Yeah. Episode. No clue. Yeah. No clue. No clue. It's got to be ramping up, though, because I think Lee's coming back the next episode,

and that seems like that's his final bow. I hate to... I don't want to not have confidence in your predictions because it would be foolish of me. I mean, you were dead right with this episode. We were watching it along with our fans. We were doing a fan watch along. You can also subscribe to that on Patreon. I'm done hitting that.

But we were watching along, and you had mentioned that this teased Camille scene was not going to be at the end of the season. It wasn't going to be this triumphant return like Gandalf the White. You said that. You said it was going to be this episode for a little brief

moment and you were 100% correct. And I'm actually kicking myself because I don't know how I couldn't have seen that coming. Is this your thoughts and not? No. We'll get into it. It was a gummy kind of day. I had to take quite a few edibles to get through this. Patrick, start us off with your thoughts. Okay. I was a little concerned about this episode. It was a little boring at the top, but I got to tell you, it sure ramped up towards the end. Major thought here.

Alyssa, who I was kind of still weighing whether or not she was a demon up until this episode. She truly is a villain. I mean, how dare her come into this studio of ours and let us interview her. And I leave going, you know, I don't know. I think her tone is a little inappropriate

and I think she can be a little condescending. But that's the worst part of Alyssa because after all, Camille was lazy, drinking on the job. And just, you know, didn't seem like she really wanted to work on boats. Well, you often allot too long a leash for people. I felt the demon vibe almost instantaneously. You did?

Yeah. Wow. It's almost like she's begging for all of us to hate her. Right. Especially towards the end of the... Well, Pat, she's young. What do you mean now? Pat, she's a young woman okay she's not fully

formed and if you think you're hotter than somebody you just got to come out and say it on national television you know you can't keep that stuff inside to quote the great lisa rena it can metastasize give you cancer go ahead oh okay yeah anyway i really enjoyed the episode uh made me feel dirty uh but uh i think a decent uh 14 uh knots why did you say that huh why did you say that it made me feel uh why did it make you feel dirty uh just uh ross is gross and he's a pig and uh and just all the drunkenness and him slamming that food in his face. You know what? I think it reminded me, remind myself of me as a younger man. You know, those drunken nights, you forget your gross behavior. Before you know it, you're at someone's kitchen table

and you're just slamming, I don't know, rice-a-roni down your throat. Yeah, so I'm glad you said rice. How many pots did you give it? 14. Will, I don't want to get into specifics, but we should mention that it's a bit of a cardinal rule you know everybody's been there um you get drunk you're slamming food in your face with wanton disregard for your body anybody around you but you can't do it to communal troughs of rice

you can't you can't shove giant spoonfuls of communal rice in your mouth half of which is falling straight back into the communal fat of rice it's not okay it's not fucking all right but i like this episode a lot hundred pods wow now i gotta tell you i'm a little hot i went down to go see that scientist yesterday. Oh! You're going to talk about that on APS? I don't know. It fucked my whole week up.

Did I... Were the mysteries of the universe revealed to me? No. They weren't. Dylan talked to a 95-year-old scientist that I think helped create the atomic bomb or something. And then we've got, you know, I'm rushing to take notes for this show,

and my cat is jumping on my lap, and it does this thing where she attacks the face. Now, it's in a loving manner, but when you're trying to rush through notes, I mean, it's just not a good thing. We play this dance all day. She jumps, she bites. It's too hard.

I kick her off. We got to get into the show. Okay. Not to mention this company, Vocal Media. They keep hitting me with $10 charges. I've written so many emails, and now I feel like I'm exploring and investigating this Russian nesting doll of crime. It's a shell corporation and a shell corporation.

Should I just move on with my life and not go through this investigation? Yes, but I can't stop. Someone needs to be fired from that company, obviously reimbursed, but now I need heads to roll and I don't care if they have children. Ever think of letting it go? That's what I just said. I can't. Let's get into the show. Last we left off, the guests were starving on the beach. Right. They ponder the, I think, rather valid question. Hey, where's the food? Have you ever thought about letting it go?

Patrick, if you've sent a request to cancel a subscription five, six and a half times, and they keep digging you for $9.99, how are you going to let that go? You don't, Dylan. You go down to that bank you have there, and you cancel your account. That's a whole mess. We'll talk about it later. So the guests are starving. They're told to shut up and play bocce ball. Oh, no, I like this because Ross attempts to distract the paying guests, which includes a pregnant woman, with a tour of the various VIP areas that they can explore while they starve. Is the sound off? Does it sound funky in the cans? No, not at all.

Are you sure? Yeah. This is, you know, there's something else is going on with this board and I'm sorry to interrupt so much, but you know, this is back to the etiquette. I mean, I know there's something different about this, but we shouldn't be sharing a studio. Building a community is overrated. All right, fair enough. Can I go back to these VIP areas? So they're throwing these balls and someone says backspin. And you and I both texted about this. You can't create backspin with groveless balls and thick sand.

I mean, I don't know what's going on with these people. They're losing their minds. They're hungry. Go ahead. Hey, Dylan, it's the prestige of all these specific areas that this amazing team has set up for them. We got Ross is like, hey, look over there. They're in the sand there. There's some balls over there.

We're calling that the gaming area. Oh, and look over there. There's that sand again with two folding chairs. We're calling that the lounging area the lounge yeah no this is akin to the bachelor setting up hometown dates at la quinta by the ice machine yeah it's a nice try but you know pat's pulling up a sound effect didn't work ross didn't work no it did not it did not work at all so um i, you know, I know I'm a negative ninny right now. Yeah, you're being pretty negative.

I am in no mood for Rachel's shit. The beans, beans, more can you. You just, Rach, don't do beans, beans. Everybody's heard beans, beans. We don't need to hear beans, beans. Well, here's my problem. That little ditty, the last time you're supposed to normally hear that is when you're hanging out with other kids

the same age they're picking their nose. Right. Like five. Yeah. You know, Rachel's, I think, a little arrested development. I think she's trapped in a six-year-old. Well, it's not that she's trapped in a six-year-old.

She's trapped in haunting projections of an insane asylum. Yeah. Maybe that tattoo, the ink got to her brain. Don't get ahead of yourself. I just, oh, Jesus Christ. Looks like someone's carrying a bucket of paint. I'm getting tripped.

Don't get ahead of yourself. Oh, I got a bunch. Alyssa pops a bottle of champagne, hits her in the face. She says, I think I'm concussed. Serves you right, you witch. Fuck. So Tony tells Haley to not eat.

You know, Zaneb and Cole all over again. I mean, this goddamn tangerine keeps following us all over the place. Really unbelievable. He tells her not to eat. I mean, yikes.

Then we get back to this lovely group of people. They're being very cool, actually, about what the show is about, subjecting the wealthy to incompetence. Now, they're cool with three courses, and Rachel relays this information back to Captain Sandy, and Captain sandy says snap this is timeshare creeping back out this is this is jazzercise this is tony robbins this is snap

i think you're doing a wonderful job rage hey uh what'd you think of the lunch though dylan you're gonna gloss over that didn Didn't even, didn't even. A lot of plastic Tupperware containers with a gelatinous food in there. I think the guests loved it though. Who am I to judge? Well, I, I, I, and mea culpa, but I didn't, I didn't track the food. I've got dinner. Okay. But these beach setups, you know, it's, it's a real whirlwind of bullshit.

Let's get to Ross and Katie. Ross says, I'm not sure where we stand. And I think we both know that that is a bizarre lie because we know exactly where he stands. He knows exactly where they stand. She is nothing but a hole to him. And not WH, not hole as in a a being i mean hole as in a hole he doesn't think she's whole he thinks she's a hole and so he has a certain amount of detachment because you can't get too close to holes you can't let them stay in

your house for 18 years feed them good good food, and then they die. Then you get a new one to appease the child. Now, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to equate women to dogs. I don't feel that way, but Ross does. He certainly does. All right. So he says he doesn't want to make this any more complicated than it already is.

Smash cut to I'm hotter than her yeah you are you're so bad i mean the guy is a sex addict well i think he was probably saying this wasn't a good idea because how are you how are you supposed to watch your uh favorite uh porn offerings from uh right this scumbag probably, the pig. That's so funny. It's like the honeymooner kind of evolution to the modern couple that are dealing with their sex addiction and the woman's like,

hey, can I watch with you? And he's like, she always wants to watch porn with me. I just want to watch on my own tonight. But we should be like, honey, I don't care what you're me. I just want to watch on my own tonight. But what if you should be like, honey, I don't care what you're into. I'm into it too. And then he whips open his phone

because you know all guys are pigs. Oh my God, I'm going to call the police. Do you masturbate on your cell phone? What? Do you use your cell phone? Who doesn't? That's what I'm saying. It's so many people.

So many people. And it's staring back at you recording everything in case you run for president someday well so is the uh so is the camera on the computer and we've talked about it it's the nsa and moloch and we don't need to get into it. So, let's get to Alyssa, who is, I mean, you know, we've covered it, but let's just call a demon a demon. People are starting to make her feel like it was her fault, and she's getting emotionally worn down by that kind of wordless insinuation that she feels from Ben and others on the boat and i would argue that it's not them it's your conscience you remember that thing that you felt for seven and a half minutes last episode let that thing up for air man my god well fucking awful so um good news is we have a new dex due uh his name is tyler he will be floating

back and forth though it does seem that he excels in the interior yes he does um regular old john nash this guy right uh john nash yeah yeah yeah he's great is that a basketball player or something yep oh nice no he's the beautiful mind guy with basketball player or something? Yep. Oh, nice. No, he's the beautiful mind guy with the pen we were just talking about. I didn't know his name. I just saw the movie starring Cameron Crowe or whatever the hell his name is. Russell Crowe.

Same thing. No, it's not. You know what, Dylan? I was just thinking about this today. Yeah. My wife are talking. I'm like, well, she's looking at her computer and she's chuckling away.

I'm like, hey, what are you doing? And she names some Instagram person. I'm like, well, she's looking at her computer and she's chuckling away. I'm like, hey, what are you doing? She names some Instagram person. I'm like, okay. Up until I was 22 years old, I only needed to know 22 names of famous people that I needed to know the dirt or the ski. Now I need to know 4,000. Nathan chasing horses. No clue.

He was in dances with wolves. Just got accused of sexual assault. Is that right? Celebrity. My God. This is what we're talking about. Nathan Chasing Horses is... We're supposed to know this guy's name.

Mr. Beast? I get into fights with fans about Mr. Beast and his philanthropy that he uses to make himself money i don't want to get into it so let's move on to um sandy bro she's briefing ross and frage about this guy coming on and she says you can use him however you want but don't just stick him in the laundry room and it's like sandy are we gonna use him however we want or are you gonna tell us that we can't put him in the fucking laundry room, Sandy? It's a great point.

Stop! We can't have timeshare coming back. Don't worry. She'll be leaving soon. So Tyler arrives, and his arrival gives us an insight, actually, into another C-R Rat, that being Ross. Is this when he reflects on his time in South Africa? Yeah.

Oh, yeah. Yeah. Brief stint in prison. Yeah. Very Sea Rat-y. Yeah. Well, what'd he do in South Africa? I don't think he really stated it.

It was something about surfboarding, and he's like you know spend some time in prison if there are any sithifricans out there that are listening to us just shoot us a note what's going on seems like a very i don't know seems like a uh kind of a messy place. Yeah. They got bunny chow and everything, but very, very checkered and horrific past. I think a lot of that still remains with the South Africans. They export some of the worst music too. You ever see that movie Chappy, directed by the same guy that did District 9?

Oh, he's a great export. The guy who made District 9. The guy that says prunes. Yes. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Well, their biggest pop group, I can't think of their name now

uh but uh anyway i did some work at their house and i flooded their floors and all the wood boards uh bent up is that the aquatic expert uh deuce bigelow uh is that the guy and the girl it's the guy and the girl yes they are the south africa's biggest hip-hop what is their name ninja is his name yeah he was so pissed i i walked down there i guess the personal assistant wasn't there to Africa's biggest hip hop band. Oh, what is their name? Ninja? Is his name Ninja? Yeah. He was so pissed. I walked down there. I guess the personal assistant wasn't there to tell me that I'm going to get sued or something. He sat me down and read me the riot act. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

It's like, it's nothing I can do, dude. Well, you fucked up his house. Well, he was renting it to be fair. Well, you fucked up the person's house. Well, I told him, hey, don't worry about it, Ninja. Here's what I'm going to do. Put some fans around here. Trust me.

They're just going to be here for 48 hours. Ninja, don't worry about it, Ninja. Here's what I'm going to do. Put some fans around here. Trust me. They're just going to be here for 48 hours. Ninja, don't have a cow. Yeah. All right. So Sandy tells them that they can do this, but they can't do that. And snap. And then we get to issues with the interior. Frazier is not communicating well.

And he and Rachel are kind of trying to work on that it would seem as though while frazier is recognizing that he needs to improve rachel is actually improving right before our eyes we've known for a couple weeks now improving right before our eyes. We've known for a couple weeks now that the visions that she's seeing while she tries to make Ensalada Con Manchego

are things that would break other people. Like Beaker from the Muppets? Well, I was going to say the hallucinations seem to be getting a little bit more jovial those those still concerning stop talking to me i'm cooking bread get out of my head

yeah i feel bad for her yeah no i know she's trying to fucking cook she's got a muppet talking to her but at least it's at least it's beaker this time and not that guy who played Rorschach in The Watchmen. He was terrified. That's a scary old guy behind bars telling you that you've gone insane when you're trying to make Enceladicon Manchego. Fucking crazy shit. Get out of my head. All right.

So, Rachel, we skipped over Tyler completely. There's nothing. He's sexually fluid and OCD. We don't know anything about him yet. We'll watch a season's worth of him and we'll have more info on him. But go ahead if you want to say anything. Well, he just looks like he plays a prince in one of those movies like Braveheart, where his dad's a violent, evil king.

Love that take. Love that take. And he's the prince, the thoughtful one. And he's also struggling with his sexuality. Yeah. Oh, my gosh. I think he'd be great in that part. A fabulous knight kind of story.

Yeah. No, he's cool man listen this younger generation they're all fucking bowies and have fun what have i said it's the pinnacle of cool it's the pinnacle of cool oh yeah you know you look at ross although who knows ross is probably a bowie as well he'll toss into fucking anything. And then give a performance review after. All right. So Rachel is printing menus. It's fine, but I don't think he did it on the first night. So it's just this weird thing where it's like, they're like trying to make up for the shitty dinner.

And now we have like, it just feels like B-squad shit. She's trying to step up. Yeah. Um, Sandy tell her when she said she got them down to a three course. Snap. Snap. Yeah.

Um, but yeah, no, it just, it would give off the vibe to me if I was a paying guest that the chef was inconsistent, possibly seeing things. Oh, tonight we get cards okay

so first course is going to be ensalada con manchego con paprika and pear the main is going to be a bacalao with saffron rice and pigeon peas and finally we're going to end with a quarter scoop of pear and lemon sorbet now the salad goes over well the guests um speak of getting rid of animals and the whole meal actually comes out rather on time and the guests seem to enjoy it now there one there was one little blemish wherein frazier calls the pigeon peas the wrong thing and then corrects it to the wrong thing he says something like greed peas that goes to chickpeas now again this wouldn't be an issue if they didn't have those fucking menus that you guys never do right in front of them.

They can see that they're called pigeon peas, not the two things you said. $60,000 a day. Okay. So, Katie invites Ross into her bedroom. invites Ross into her bedroom. Now, here is where my envy kicks in for the sex addict. There is a certain amount of detachment

that is arrived at in the sex addict in a very crude, unhealthy way. A lot of craggles in the road. I choked on my spit. What's that movie with Denzel? He's blind and heavenly. He's divine. He's walking through the highway,

and he's like, that's the twist. He's blind. Anyway, so that kind of journey they take to get to this point where you do have a certain amount of detachment from the more irresponsible trappings of love. If you weren't a sex addict and you had crushes on Katie, you may have rose-colored glasses towards the idea of moving in with one another. It's objectively not a good thing to do you know it's a bad idea it's a

bad idea the sex addicts can arrive at that conclusion very easily almost repulsed by the idea it's a great point they're able to make those snap decisions i don't know snap now it took a long time to get there but imagine if what had happened this evening happened and they both needed to go back to the same bunks. You know, it thinks what it just got a lot busier. And we wouldn't have had Tyler witness the irresponsible drinking of his bosun. Okay. Take the next thing.

I'm talking too much. Okay. Okay. All right. The boat docks guest apart. Yeah. And they leave with some critiques on the service. Yeah. Yeah. I didn't write down what they critiqued on, but there was a number of issues.

Yeah. So the guests- I love feedback. Feedback's good. The guy gives a cold, kind, and professional performance review. He had the bravery of an HR rep who has fired dozens and dozens of people. But before we get there really, really quickly, I guess there was this one note that sandy said snap and rachel did a great

job and the next day rachel wakes up still seeing things but they've calmed sandy comes in and they're talking about how great things are going and sandy kind of taps her on the back in a corleone kind of way and says let's have coffee and i was like what the fuck is going on here sandy is still not happy with rage's performance there's more to talk about yeah she's trying to get a deeper understanding what's going on with that fucking interior yeah because there's a lot of backstabbing that's right so um i guess the next thing that follows the guests departing is usually, now not every time, but it's usually a segment that you pretty much own. So Pat, did the performance review affect the tip? Not at all. 22K, 1830 each. I think I might've rounded up, but Sandy does something quite insane here.

Despite the fact it sounded like these people were very generous, despite the fact they had had incompetence thrust on them a number of days on that very expensive vacation, Sandy somehow comes to terms with this by rather seeing it as a negative. I see feedback as a positive. Not when it's negative, Sandy. Not when it's negative.

She gets way too... She gets snapped out about this feedback. And... I love feedback. We need to get... Sandy, you suck. We need to get Captain Sandy off the boat because she's had too much lens time this year.

We want Sandy to remain at the high station she is currently at. She is no longer timeshare, and she's close to not being most improved. She's just close to being Captain Sandy. Exactly. But now with this snapping and the over-excitement with the feedback, Lee, come back, honestly. Sandy, be more like a partially nude strip club with $20 Diet Cokes, okay? We don't see the girls fully nude, therefore we want them more.

And when they leave the stage, I miss them and I don't even notice. And I'm paying $20 for a diet Coke. Is that a hypothetical or a concrete personal experience? Concrete. I have you, you've been to strip clubs where they're not full nude. A hundred percent.

Yeah. Is it like, is it sexy? Various times over my experience living in Los Angeles, they've changed the laws. Yeah. Yeah, so got to wear pasties on the nipples. Yeah, going to a bachelor party in two weeks.

Yeah. I don't do good in strip clubs. Me neither. I've gone there with you a number of times. I ask them about themselves, and they don't like it. No, they don't like that. They don't like it. Can I they don't like that. They don't like it. Can I have my $60, please?

I'm just trying to have a conversation here. How'd you end up here? You paid for me to get a strip lap dance or something, which I don't like. Because I'm talking too much. She's punching me in the face with her boobs for about three minutes. And then she goes, it's going to be $ and i said hey my buddy i paid for this i do not think that i paid for that i think i was probably reimbursed because i i don't just dole

out money like that i'm not that generous i didn't have that much money back then that was a reimbursement i think if i could pay it for Pat to get a laugh dance. You gotta be kidding me. All right. So the tip is great, and the tip is great. Then Ben gives Camille a little call, and Sandy takes Rach to coffee. And we don't interplay between Ben and Camille, but Frasier has this interior meeting,

and we bounce back from the coffee to that for a little bit. The coffee with Sandy was kind of meaningless. I guess the whole thing was meaningless, but there was one moment where Alyssa stands up, overwhelmed, verklempt, and storms out of the room in a fit of tears. And I got to tell, I got to say, Frasier, storms out of the room and a fit of tears and i gotta tell i gotta say frage you know he doesn't have the easiest environment to wrangle it's his first time being a chief stew this is quite a test for frage it is he's failing i but it's quite a test i did too much for a first time bosun i like

i like frage i love frage doing a great job he's learning on the job unfortunately for him uh can i uh yeah can i do a meanwhile yes please uh ross is uh he's pretty sure he's not gonna commit again because she keeps bugging him about that whole moving into the same room thing yeah and uh it's not a surprise uh but i was gonna say with katie if i could talk to her why don't we start with uh baby steps here katie because this is kind of on you wanting this uh man to move into your room with you your dwelling yeah let's start with you guys going out on a night out on the town where he doesn't to uh attempt to stick his tongue down another girl's throat and here is the uh the magical dust of the sex addict katie's got a good head on her shoulders kat Katie doesn't suffer fools. Katie's seen some bullshit.

She's also seen Ross openly mess around with both Alyssa and an unwanting victim. I would say Camille right in front of her face, and she's still going back. Katie, you can do better. Ross is not available. You need something better.

Self-described sex addict, I believe. I mean, he said it. Thousands and thousands and thousands. And he's been to prison. So anyways, we head out for an evening on the town and we have a special guest joining. It is none other than the interloper herself, Camille. Now, I think the overriding thing from Camille's entry,

and go ahead and say, I know not the hatred in my heart, but Alyssa really ramps up the bitchiness quite early and quite often. She's just talking about how pathetic it is and how embarrassed she should be. The second she gets there, it's just ridiculous. She hates her. Now, Dylan it is and how embarrassed she should be the second she gets there. She hates her. Now, Dylan, you touched

on this minutes ago. Yeah. On the last episode, how Alyssa, we thought she was dealing with this. She had 48 hours of an existential spiral, questioning her part in playing the termination of Camille here. An experience I thought last episode was sort of spiritual awakening.

And at this point, the entertainment, last episode, a sort of spiritual awakening. And at this point, at the entertainment, now still being a condescending bitch. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And listen, I mean, we don't need to bleep something. No. I know, I don't think so. You know what?

I'm standing by my words. You are? Yeah. Even though you find her incredibly attractive because she looks like your wife? She does not look like my wife. I mean, for one, I'm shocked that you've overcome these biases.

I asked a buddy of mine today who watches the show and he was saying who he thought was hot on it and it was Alyssa. Alyssa's gorgeous. Yeah. I think Katie's- She's a bit of a demon, but she's gorgeous. And she knows it, which is why,

are we at the, we're at the blackout part, right? Or no, that's after the mudslide. Sorry. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, the mudslide. Yeah, yeah. This is when Ross ramps up the drink.

I didn't take him for a rum and Coke kind of guy, but you know. Who is a rum and Coke kind of guy? No clue. A pirate? Have you ever ordered a rum and coke in your life? No. I don't like rum. Makes me sick.

It's too sweet. What about the rum? What? Oh, that's Johnny Depp's character. All right. So, sorry all over the place. But we have this romantic goodbye between Camille and Ben. He's got the flutters for her, and I think it's really cute.

No, it's never going to work out. He's a sea rat. She's a sea rat rapper. It's just not going to work, I don't think. Yeah, I'm surprised they gave them this parting scene and what a what a romantic scene it was yeah parking lot and uh you know did you catch the music that uh that sucked so bad it didn't even make the cut for being played on love is blind what was it oh it's just like uh i'll never let you go yeah yeah and then thank god it really sucked yeah now it reminded me of the

very memeable love between ron swanson and armando that we saw over the weekend have you seen it no so we continue the romance as we board this vessel uh the sex robot ross has commandeered and designated a room for him and katie to uh have sex in he's throwing her a bit of a penance fuck i think for refusing the room and he's speaking like a blood lab technician to her it's just very your prescription is ready kind of plastic gloves. With that whole bag of bullshit that he needs to be close to the other head of department. You know, they have to meet at night, so that's why he can't be in the same room with you.

Well, they hop in the shed. Not because he's pounding his butt to Pornhub's offerings for... No, he's not. Because that would make him weird we have to bleep that I mean I don't think that you can it's a category I don't think that I know but because it's a category

you're letting out that you're aware of its existence which is shocking we're all aware no I'm not aware and then I have to bleep it again hey Dale what the fuck there's good news here about this whole ross katie business because he has a solution yeah okay we're not going to stay in the same room with each other but uh i'll bang the hell out of you in a guest cabin well and that they do

they park in the shower and he says job well done i will give you a rating at a later date and with the british accent and with the sex addiction it just paints a really kind of patrick bateman type scary character but we have to get to the next day well i was going to say this is what's truly disgusting about a sex act never mind uh living with each other he can't even sleep the entire night in a guest cabin with you after the fluids are released on the guest cabin sheets uh there's no snuggling uh despite them having the day off the next day dylan right they instead go their separate ways and that is very similar to what a john does after uh flushing out his you know junk at the cat house what John? A John, like a guy who pays for sex, man. Oh, like all those sad guys who used to be on that show, the bunny ranch. Yeah. Yeah. The cat house.

Yeah. The cat house. Yeah. Yeah. They go in there and they negotiate and the girl's like, okay, you get me for five hours. Right. Right. Right. For like a thousand dollars. And the guy's like, all right. All right. That that sounds pretty cool a whole five hours yeah now the girls at the cat house they understand how men operate right the guy goes in one of those rooms pounds away for three and a half minutes right blows his load on that cat house floor right he runs the fuck out of there because he's got to go home to his wife oh well i i five hours sounded really good i think that's a rarity i that, and we'll get back to the show, but really quickly, I'm always stunned

at the big buck discount kind of pricing in the sex world. I mean, this stuff should be so much more expensive. $250 an hour. That's not enough. But when you walk into the bunny ranch, there's that line of bunnies, it's just, you're in a bungalow in the middle of a desert. How do you not just turn around, walk out and go, I need to get back into therapy because what portal I just walked into is not good.

I love when they'd hand them the menu. Like, you know, it's the specials for happy hour. It's like, guys, look at it. Like, all right, I'm looking here. So can I, I can swap out the. See, we've got to bleep that. I'm trying to, Patrick. Getting back to it. We head to the Sea Rat Day off. Alyissa has the tits out and she has already marked

her prey this is death by a thousand cuts kind of stuff and once he is good and blacked out that is when she will attack and talk about how hot she is but we're not there yet and we'll get it takes two to tango it takes two to tango. So do you want to talk about Rachel's back tattoo? Yeah. Yeah. Now, to be fair, Rachel's a friend of the show, and I'm only going to make you already have said that it looks like somebody dumped a bucket of paint. Well, she says it's large enough for a target of jizz.

She does say that. Yeah. Yeah. I think it's so big and ugly that a blind man facing the other direction couldn't miss. I mean... It's that big. But Patrick, for that... For that to happen...

It's quantum physics. A shocking sequence of events would have to take place uh who's that guy that made uh batman begins you know he's always doing those movies about physics and stuff um are you talking about mark anthony no no no the guy who uh christopher nolan christopher nolan man right yeah yeah what are you saying there's technically no space or time right a blind man standing uh the opposite direction of Rachel in a film by Christopher Nolan could pull that off. If it did happen, it would be something avaternal,

something divine coming down and aiding that back to its target. Like inception. Yeah, 100%. This is what the Vedics study. It's not a van falling off that bridge. It's a drip of jizz all right fuck man i hated that movie what what movie inception oh that's just wrong that's a wrong take

all right where am i in my notes all right so are we at the mud spa off that stupid catamaran? Yeah. So yeah, we get to this active volcano and listen, it's fun. It's hot. Everybody's got nice butts. All the sea rats are really, really beautiful. I'm glad they're having a fun time. This is when Alyssa moves in on Ross or maybe Ross moves in on Alyssa.

Katie, come on. Come on. Get out of here with this guy. Jesus, you're going to let him make a fool of you all day long? Especially after he slept with you last night. I think he's owed a slap in the face. Well, it takes two to tango. He is a tango addict.

He's addicted to this kind of tangoing. And to do this in front of katie is um nothing short of sociopathic i mean or so i don't know which one it is but it's shocking to just completely discredit her feelings in this situation not to even do it off in a corner but to do it blatantly out in the open in front of everybody now again you know you guys are not dating but there is a certain decorum that uh people with i don't know some kind of code of ethics go about their business i'm gonna mix uh mix in sociopath with a little bit of uh narcissism and sex addict sure yeah i mean dead three and he's got a he's got a sick little body on him and he's got a great work ethic but i mean this is just he's a red face drunk you know when we get to that bar you see his

face get redder you know i know he's not irish i'm irish but some old guys that i used to see as a kid they drink their face gets redder oh the great the great sir alex ferguson there's a there's a uh uh syndrome where you get your face gets redder as you drink. Yeah, exactly. So, quick note about these volcanoes. I can't do these jacuzzis that are too hot. I can't get into a jacuzzi that's 104 degrees. It's too much.

It's not enjoyable. It's too hot. Do you feel the same way? Now, I'm not talking about 98 degrees, but let's meet somewhere in the middle. My wife is addicted to hot water. Me too, dude. Thank you.

It's just the female threshold for pain. It's much greater. All right, so let's get to the night out. Ross is... I should remind the audience, Ross began the day by saying that he would be having a sober day. Did he really?

He said he didn't want to die a young, an early dad. Oh, that's right. That's right. And there he goes, just getting blackout drunk. Oh, look at that, what happened? So Tony says, and I wish I had written down what it was in Spanish because it was so beautiful. My brother crosses the line with drinking ross is like we mentioned in this state where he's shoving pilaf in his face

and it's communal pilaf he is sliding into innocent bystanders trying to just enjoy their dinner and worst of all he is sucking down siggy's while holding hands with alissa i mean dead horse point belabored but these two are just revolting revolting this episode yeah it's almost as though they didn't uh know the cameras and microphones were on because uh well they were now see this is what i was talking about well there are some benefits to the sex addict he knows that he cannot move into this room for right or wrong this is one of those things that were he not a sex addict had he not a hole where his heart should be he could have made it through this but now his life is going to be a fucking mess i'm so excited to see fucking uh sasha fierce katie for the rest of the season ross take care of yourself elissa take care of yourself and to everybody listening

and watching take care of yourself too we love you guys very much for supporting the show itunes ratings and reviews spotify ratings and reviews helps the show immensely we love reading them we'll make a better point moving forward you know it bores the rest of the audience but we'll we'll read some reviews uh join us on patreon and goodbye i'm dilling saying goodbye pat say goodbye later dudes Thank you.