Another Below Deck Podcast - Delaney Delaney, Lexi | Below Deck Med S7 E12

Episode Date: September 14, 2021

Dylan, Nick and Pat are back to talk waterfalls, improv, Delaney's dreams of TV, being kidnapped in a white van, Bob Kraft, what makes a good speech, hiring and firing and Lexi turning into a demon once again.  Video of this episode here: https://youtu.be/gu1fd8xT5GY Get our Below Deck YouTube channel to 1,000 subscribers https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCtvB1iiShWreiKusHjzXI0w?sub_confirmation=1 Subscribe to our Patreon for our coverage of Below Deck Sailing seasons 1 & 2 and our coverage of Love is Blind https://patreon.com/anotherpodcastnetwork Merch: AnotherMerchStore.comThis show is part of the Spreaker Prime Network, if you are interested in advertising on this podcast, contact us at https://www.spreaker.com/show/5727246/advertisement

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That's KLA, theiwi.com slash Spotify. We saw him fall in teases earlier on in the season, but we did not have the context that this was going to be his move. This should be on the MTV, that network. They have one show that they run for. We did a deal first. Yeah, it's longs there. Welcome aboard another brand spanking episode of another below deck podcast. My name is Dylan. I'm settled up next to one real necklace Davis.

Oh, hey, matey. That's pretty sure the podcast is over there behind my glasses. Hey, everybody. how are you? I'm doing well because this may be the greatest episode of Full of Deck I've ever seen in my life, although it may be very gross after watching it. It was like I had to take a shower because of all the vitriol and the hatred, but that is not to say it wasn't unbelievably entertaining. I want to apologize to you, to you, and to everybody listening

for getting ahead of myself. Before we get to thoughts and knots, we have to talk about PSA's Pat. Go ahead. Yes. I want you guys to know a lot of you have signed up for Patreon. Patreon.com slash another podcast network. We are so happy for your patronage, but I do want to say Patreon don't come. did I say? No he said calm. I said get a little I've been talking all day Patreon don't come slash literally been talking all day okay I'm exhausted but that doesn't mean I'm not gonna put in the star studded performance here star studded how many stars are gonna be there I don't know I can't talk them very tight but let me get to my point you didn't drink tonight you drink tonight. You did say that. You want some of that? No, no, no, no.

Please, let me get to this. He has an old heart. Guys, people that came over for our bachelor in paradise coverage are fucking eating it up and loving it. And they're so happy you see them all talking about like seriously, guys, go sign up on it if their shows are great. So even if you're not a fan of bachelor, you'll still love what we do.

There's another podcast show. I want to hit 1200. There's a ton of stuff over there. We covered the latest incarnation of love is blind. That was really some of my best work personally. Yeah, all of our right. And so guys, yeah, have you paid us a compliment one time on air? All the time. Okay, go ahead. I don't want the infinite. He's very tired. Narcissism is nauseated. I don't think so at all. Anyway, so give us five bucks. Patriot Doncom slash another podcast network. I should probably have an energy drink. Absolutely. What's in it? Just espresso. Sugarless. Just have some energy. You're a little, you're like an old bass at hand right now, the eyes that hang well.

And I also have a PSA. If you have already signed up for a Patreon.com slash another podcast network for $5 to your upgrade to the $10 to your Patreon. Don't come to get Patrick's show. Arguably the best show on our network. Arguably the worst. But it's a good time nonetheless, because even if it was the worst show on our network, Are you really the worst? But it's a good time nonetheless because even if it was the

where show on our network, that doesn't mean it's bad. It can still be really good be the where show on our network. I know you guys are the best. Also, thank you for heating the PSA and CTA from last week. As of this recording, we are 127 subscribers away from 1000 and monetizing our another below deck podcast YouTube channel. Yeah, so new endeavor for us on that website. It's an awful website, but we need your guys support there.

One last note before we move on the show, and this is the power. Because we have to get into the show. Our podcast with, yes, we will, but this is about the show in Captain Stanley specifically. So my wife is watching in this episode tonight, and she turns to me and she says, you know what, this season, we haven't seen Captain Sandy in the galley that much. And I said, on ironically, I said, you're welcome.

I did that. I'll say it again, your narcissism is nauseated. But could be accurate. Could be very accurate. Captain TimeShare has just not lived up to her nickname so far. She's doing a myriad of other things wrong, but I said, I'm myriad. God dammit.

It doesn't make any sense to me. Let's get into the show, please. I like that I said something wrong, which made Dylan, he really wanted to correct it, but he was coming. I have to get into the show. Let's get to a fan favorite segment that his thoughts and nots. I'll go first. Like I said, this episode made me feel Yucky. Delaney's desperation made me feel yucky, but also super entertaining to watch. Lexi is if we didn't already know we know full blown now. Ninth circle of hell kind of demon.

She wanted some guy to be aborted tonight. Ninth circle. I mean, some of the nastiest stuff, we said worse, but to each other. And about strangers and the people on the show. Yeah. But all that amounted to a lovely episode of Below Deck. We had the ball of snakes that we got so often

in Below Deck sailing at the bits were out, people were falling, people were blacked out, people were screaming, crying, sleeping, waking up in vans, thinking they were kidnapped. I mean, it had everything. Scuba, waterfalls, hundred pots. That extra 10 minutes added to the running time. I know, I know.

All right, I'm gonna go back. It's like the fucking godfather of below deck episode. Well Dylan, I kind of disagree with you. And partly I disagree with you for the things that you've loved about it. I actually didn't love. Right. The stuff with Chef Spaz, by the way,

who in his own right is a fucking monster? Is it? No, we're near Lexie. All right, but two things to be true. He's still a monster. She just happens to be sitting next to a saint. Yeah, yes. She has more confidence in herself.

Yeah, she does. The fact that we got two bouts of that fight was a little too much for me. I was bothered by it. I was kind of disgusted. I wanted them both shut up. I wish I was actually manager of that. Maybe I was in Katie's position

because Katie chose to just step aside and said, hey, I'm not on the fucking clock. I, if I was Katie, would have said, Lexi, here's a knife, spaz, here's a hammer. Sure. You guys go over there and when you're done and you finish it out, the ones still breathing can return

to the table and finish their day You know this when we started this show we talked about the rules of the ocean This is what we thought the conflict resolution in this world was gonna look like sadly It's not but you know, maybe you should sign up to be a chiefs do and not your typical one either Last last no What a producer's dream Delaney showed up here. Boy firing on all cylinders, putting it all out there. Boy she wants to stay on this show. Yeah. It's really pathetic. Ninety knots. Nick, I love that

last point there. I mean, you know your desperate if you're willing to have group sex with Matt just to get some screen time. It's, it's sad. It's mind blowing. It's sad. But I, I, it's mind blowing. I, I think I leaned towards the side of Dylan. We all didn't feel good about what we saw. It was Yucky the way these people were talking to each other.

But I've said it before. I'll say it again We watch these shows to feel and gross and yucky are both feelings Their their fights were incredible. It was the unlikable force but verse the big douchebag right right I could think of a more clever way to say that but yeah but I don't there's just so much stuff to get into so much and a lot of these Sea rats are ripe targets for the smiley face killer. I was actually a little worried about that later

Hundred dots hundred dots crazy. All right, so we begin with the same conversation that's been teased in One incarnation or another for what feels like seven weeks now But guys actually in a Gwen's head is in the box to kind of twist. Delaney is actually fired. I thought that it was just going to be, you know, a kind of, actually we want you to stay on, despite everybody being against it, but no, she will be let go. Well, but she isn't having it. Let's roll play here. Let's reenact. It's so funny. I have in my notes. Let's remind the fans how good we are at

Improved. Okay, Nick your Katie and I'm Delaney. Tell me I'm fired. Really appreciate your help. I'm not your typical. But we glad to have you on you did nothing wrong, but at the end of this charter we're gonna have to say good boy. No, but okay, so this is, okay, that's not, it's not good in prof. That was like the opposite of the first rule. It's the opposite of, okay, I'll be, I'll be delighted. I thought that was actually pretty decent.

I'll be delighted. You, you fire me. Hey, this is Katie, I'm not your typical chiefs, too. Okay, just fire me though. And you've done a great job, but at the end of the Chateau, we're gonna have to let you go. Why? I haven't it's just too much stress on me and the boat and there's too many moving parts and we don't need. What's moving? All the people in the cabins and the cabins and the will. Don't people just move their sheets though? No, we have sheets and we have to we send them off the boat

We bring them on the boat and there's not extra sheets and I'm not standing. No, that does this happening I'll believe that Sandy kind of left it up to me Is this improv or is this a reenactment? The lady stop your mouth from moving anymore, okay? You're being let go. God damn it. You lied on your resume. Get the fuck out of here. Oh, it's great too.

I want to say this. Yes, they should have said, look, you really pulled the fucking rip cord on that. I remember it pretty well. Katie should have said, aside from you attempting to strangle Lexi and hurling her body off the boat, you can't stay here in the other day.

Exactly. All right. They were both wrong in a situation. Just accept that you're fired, equipping so thirsty, Delaney. Yeah. Get off the boat. But Katie also was putting it like,

it's just making it hold on me. Like literally, you have to say, like we don't need you on the boat. We're splitting people's tips up, who don't deserve it. They're working hard as they ever were. We don't need you. And I can't fire Lexi.

She's black. If the queen of the sea was in Katie's position, this would have been a very quick scene. Well, she said it on the show last week. I asked Katie, uh, Kate straight up. What would you say to fire Lexi? Right. But, you know, okay, you missed my point. So Katie walks in and tells Matt about Delaney. Matt says, well, you know what, I would have done. Who gives shit? Go fuck yourself. No, to the grindstone on your deconstructed scrambled eggs or whatever you're doing. He is right, though. He says, I would have fired Lexi and kept Delaney. Easiest solution. Were it not for the times as Nick so eloquently mentioned not two minutes ago. I would have, although Chef Spaz,

what a miscalculation of trying to get someone fired. He'd been trying to talk Katie and the firing Delaney for three days. He should have, like, what a turn coat. You should have started with Lexi Chef Spaz. You probably could have pulled this off. Right. If you were a more, you know, thrifty wallaby.

So I also hate how part of the team he is now, like Dave walks in, he's like, good moro, so it's like, oh my God. Yuck in it up with the guys now. God. Laughing at things that aren't funny, I despise that human being. If we're looking at in real time,

and we're not getting the end of the fight between him and Lexi in this moment, I started to feel, I'm like, maybe he is a good guy and he just suffers from anxiety. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And he struggles and he's just, he's kind-hearted. And I started to feel bad, maybe he's okay. I would turn out to be wrong.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Well, I feel horrible because God forbid he's listening to this show right now. You know, it can't feel good, right? Hearing us go, oh God. About his person. I think the first time I called him Chef Spaz, he tuned out.

Okay, good. I can't say Kate Chastain was thrilled that the cold open we used, selected by Brian. What was it again? It was where she said, Matt is a carny and should be around school children because he's like a cold open. Yeah, it was a great joke by her.

It was a fire joke. I actually like to pick by Brian. I told Katie, Kate, I went to picked it to highlight that. And she, and she, she actually, I won't say this word in there. This isn't confidence. All right, so of course, like she has an issue with Delaney being fired. Well, she fired her personal assistant.

Yeah, if Katie wasn't so easily stressed, we could have had all of our chips chopped down and I would have moved cappons, you know. Of course she would have, you have a butler right now. I would move my bed into the next room in my place for a butler. They weighed on you hand in the foot.

I felt she crossed the line when she said to Katie, I wish she would have discussed this with me first. She didn't say that. No, but she thought it. Okay. I was pissed off that, oh, now she's leaving. She's going to be off the boat after this charter. Now we can put her in a guest cabin for the last night. Why did you have to move? You couldn't, you could have left Matt there instead of putting him with the Chiefs 2, put in the guest cabin for one sharder and then they can do the switching anyway.

So it was just Captain Sandy's an idiot. Well speaking of Captain Sandy being a little lacking in various departments because Delaney's this like bring your kid to work kind of thing. It's a great way to put it. Um, so Delaney steps up to the challenge of throwing lines to these strange Doc rats. And she completely fucking blows it. Oh, are we there already? Well, I just skipped breakfast. You didn't want to talk about that. That's poppy seed crepes with lemon and ricotta bacon and fruit. The crepes are not gluten-free, nor are the muffins and bagels. Okay, skip breakfast.

Yeah, but your point was that minutes later, Delaney is a, a socks at throwing rope. Right. And I was thinking they should hire Peter North for that job. He knows how to throw some ropes in my right. There you go, Pat. That coffee's coursing through his veins. Yeah, I feel good. Like it. Look at him. All right. So, um, yeah, you need gloss over that, that Lloyd eats a lot of beads.

Yeah, he's English. You're right. I did. All right, so the guests, the part, I don't have anything really on them leaving. Let's get to the tip, Pat. Go ahead. Oh, sure. Okay. Well first off, Sandy praises Delaney. Sure. Mainly the gist is thanks for not being an asshole like the rest of these people that usually these sea rats that show up Right, so I appreciate that Delaney tip meeting 17 grand 1300 each. I'm gonna say that's a little light little Little light for what seemed like the longest charter of 40 days. It was unbelievably long. They did a really good job There shouldn't have been anything less than 20. I agree. So not only does Delaney get a share in the spoils

she also gets to go out with them and Go on their main vacation of the season. She's like an annoying character and hey Arnold Like do it like begrudgingly you have to ask them if they want to play stick ball. And of course they're like, yeah. It's like, oh, God. What's interesting, I don't want you to play that. About Delaney wanting to be on TV, is she's really making the most of her camera time. And I actually thought she went to like,

because there are classes you can take on how to make the most as a reality personality on a show. You can become the, you know, the villain or whatever. Delaney is like, I'm gonna make production really happy. I'm gonna throw the sex out there. Yeah. Even though I don't think for one second she'd have sex with Deccan Dave. No, but, and I want to go ahead of myself. She also does something else that producers love, which is she starts conversations for storylines. Yes. She goes to Lexi. So who's hooking up with who, who's like,

that was intended to say hey look at me Mixing this up for you. Oddly enough Delaney is a liar about pretty much everything on that piece of paper The only thing that she is not lying about is how confident she feels She should be on this show and I don't think that she's wrong about that She's like you said she she's prying the storylines out of people. She's terrible at her job, which is incredible TV. She should be on this show.

She should be on this show. 100%. That brings up an interesting point. We've got a couple of spin-offs coming back. I don't doubt it's not the last time we see Lexi if that was the right line of negative. Delaney. Yeah.

So I said Lexi went to many negatives. So the kind of summary of all the sex happening between Lexi and Delaney happens here. So Z is, we have a sexy meanwhile. I'll call it. Me, me. Okay. So Z is planning his attack. He's an old school guy. We get more on that later Lexie says she wouldn't touch Matt with a 10 feet pole. That's not how you say that She says that if Matt was the last person on planet Earth She would rather die than get that dick and then we learned that Delaney is this has a sick kink like Matt Who loves to get tossed into by multiple partners.

Do you, girl, and just a little piece of advice? Film it. You will find the fleeting fame that you are so addicted to and questing after. If you film it, I think everybody would be interested in that, right? Yeah. You're my projecting. You realize how shallow it is after you do do it because I as a podcaster has a... You have a sodginess thing in projecting? No, I don't think so. I felt like it was micro-aggressive in King Shamey. You could have just said, King, not sick, sick, King. Well, I mean,

orgy parties are a little, you know, in terms of kings. It's pretty, it's pretty high up there I'd say I don't want to shame anybody sexiness. You are shaming kinks. You're all right. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm being ironic She's gross and all the people that went to our gross not gross looking good gross because you go to these parties Yeah, yeah, yeah, I'm especially in a pandemic. I mean you can't just what are you showing up to a warehouse and sun Valley with Fucking stained mattresses all of the people that show up to those things aren't people that go to the Playboy mansion. It's It's not pretty. We've talked about the nesting Palm Springs. Yeah, I just show up though. You mentioned pandemic I show up with a giant bottle of a hand sanitizer. I was like, let's get this party started. Yeah

That's grossies. That's you. Very concerned about germs in this time. Nick, you ever sleep with two girls in the same day? I haven't. I haven't. I won't. Probably. It's an empty feeling the next day.

I have to tell you, you feel like you're a king of the world and once you conquer your second lady and under 24 hours. I feel bad about telling her to film. Oh wait, two in 24 hours are two at the same time. Oh no, two in 24 hours. I've done two in 24 hours or two at the same time oh no two and 24 I've done two and 24 oh you have yeah yeah I know it's not shocking you only slept with six girls in your entire life how do you pull that off don't know we're in a single day you 24 hours yeah good for you I don't want to I think you just bumped about 50% to I don't want to get

I don't want to get into it all right we all have significant in the comments my wife's family listens to the show So I don't want to get into it. Oh, no, all the guys on that side will go fuck yeah, I thought Dylan was a pus Okay, leave it in the comment section if you have I banged out two people on the same There is no comment section. There's no comment section. YouTube. YouTube, yeah. All right. So fun stuff up next. Sandy is tossing her hands up and saying, you know, you got to go and tie this ground line.

This is why I don't want to walk the boat, which is this nautical term, again, very confusing. But I guess she has to thrust because the lines aren't taught. And you know, Sandy's very indignant and frustrated. And it's like, well, you shouldn't have had someone who'd no sooner be on this show than America's next top model throwing lines to Doc rats. This is your fault. This is your fault. By the way, have you enjoyed your power trip, Captain Tybe, share?

Right. And you talked about her being absent in the galley, where she is micromanagerial the season is really on Malia. She hovers over her with the slide and with the jet ski and now with her putting on scuba gear. If I was Malia, I'd turn her, I'd be like, I have a lot of equipment to put on this. Is it gonna take me like 15 minutes? What the fuck outta here? She's gonna stand here and look at me.

The fuck outta here. I have two tanks I have to put on right now. Please go away. All right, so it turns out there's nothing wrong with the boat. Let's get to the night out. Night time! Unless thoughts. Not just a thought about our favorite sponsor, Magic Mind!

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It's the biggest discount they have ever offered us. Dylan, personal testimony. Yeah. Today, I just experimental wise. I was bored. My kid Elliott's walking around. She's 18 months old. Yeah. Put a little in her bottle. And our later, she's speaking French. Yeah. I couldn't believe it. Yeah. She speaks French now. She was speaking French. Dog chasing down criminals down the street. Pats in the room, fucking his wife, which is fine because in child, just that magic mind can take care of itself. It's crazy. Her self, crazy, herself. She speaks the most romantic language now.

Exactly. So magicmind.co promo code 25, promo code below deck 25% off. Seriously, buy it, buy it, try it. If you don't like it, he'll refund you. If you just email their customer service, they'll refund you. Yeah, but don't do that, you make us look bad.

Ah, I don't care. I think the promo code sticks. I think we've been fine. Right, yeah, yeah. If you really hate it, which you won't. In fact, don't even try it. Everybody buy it, think the promo code sticks. I think I think we've Right. Yeah. Okay. If you really hate it, which you won't In fact, in fact, don't even try it everybody buy it use the promo code then email I don't give a fuck yeah exactly just kidding though. Let's talk about just kidding about that Let's talk about our second sponsor, which we don't want to really have but I want to do a practice read and send it to

I got a guy at liquid death and they they are paying everything. So what is it? It's just water and you can. I got this. I got this. You wanna read a little on the side? Sure. Murder your thirst is they're saying it's more expensive. It's so expensive to recycle plaster.

I got, I'm actually in love with this product. I got. Yes, our second sponsor is, and not even kidding, I'm a water sob, huge water sob. We used to go around the corner. It was a very annoying, actually, my wife wanted me to go to a place called the water tap. We used to sit there and fill up with alkaline and keg in and all these different waters. She went into it.

We went with spring at the end of the day because it has the minerals and the nutrients you need. And that is exactly what liquid death is. This isn't purified tap, which is stripped of everything that water is providing you in its finest form. Liquid death is the purest water you can get. It's delicious water. It comes in a can, which is too fold important. It gets colder than plastic. So cold. It gets fucking freezing cold, deliciously cold. And also, this planet is almost dead. I mean, it'll be dead in a little bit. I love the name. Do what you can to prevent mother Gaia from falling in on itself with aluminum cans. You may think that, oh, what's the difference between plastic and aluminum? I don't know and you don't know. But Nick does. Plastic has gotten so expensive to recycle. They're

not even separating it at trash places anymore. And they have like three different kinds of plastic on every bottle. There's like the bottle, there's the ring, there's the cap, it's a horrific thing. So these guys are socially globally conscious by putting it in a can. Yes, it actually benefits recycling because they get money for it,

which then is re-put into the sustainability of the... It's a beautiful product. It's a beautiful product. It's a conversation starter too. People are like, oh, hey, I thought you fall off the wagon. I thought you've been sober for 40 years. You're like, no, still sober. This is water.

So go, everybody go check out liquid death. It's in Wal-Mart and other places and online. It's on 7-11. It's a gas station. It's the best water you can get at a convenience store. And also, it is started by Joe Manganello, a D&D nut. He is the man who took the hand and left. I wish I knew. I think he stole the hand of Vecna.

He stole the hand of Vecna. He stole that drink it for the rest of my life. He stole the hand of Vecna in a wonderful display of what D&D is about, thinking outside of the box, using the world as your own and role-playing. Go check out liquid death wherever you are. It actually, it's so good. It killed one of my dreams. I've talked to you guys before about wanting to start my own national brand of water, Rainwater, the King of All Waters, our I.G.N. And I think they've done it. They have now eclipsed every other water brand

and have the most followers on Instagram. For a good reason. All right, so thanks, liquid death. Let's move on. All right, let's get to the night out. Delaney is in her element right now. Her element is not anything on the boat. Her element is tits out at a dinner.

This is where she will shine. We go around the dinner and have a ton of fun stuff going on. Very, very seeratty. I'm going to do some quick hits. You guys stop me or we'll backtrack on whatever you want to get to. So first up, we have a conversation about non-monogamy. I find it laughable that less than attractive people have the confidence to brand themselves non-monogamous. Yeah. Specifically in Matt's case, Delaney's pretty, but also lost and desperate to be on Bravo,

and that won't matter in six months. So like, I'm sorry, but you're above commitment, Delaney, and Matt, you're above commitment. No, I totally get it. What Matt means is he can't get one person to find it. Right, right. So he's giving up on it. He's non-monogamous.

My wife hit me with this as we were washing it together, and she really enjoyed the episode. She's had a theory her entire life that she shared with me. She said, all redheads are sluts. We leave my wife said that. I do feel like they get... There is a drink called a redheaded slut, by the way. Yep. I think they get sexualized and then sometimes you feel like you need to fall into your

lane, just like a tiger woods playing golf. So then, assuming we're about an hour or 45 minutes into dinner at this point. Everyone's drunk off the choices. Almost blackout because of all the things that they're running from. And if you pause it at this moment, you could see the smiley face killer looking in the weeds. The snow storm was coming in.

He escaped to Croatia. He's like, most of my victims have been Caucasian college-aged kids, but these looking pretty ripe right now. So Coco is out and is slavering her way through a perfectly cogent point. Her and Katie can work this boat without Lexi or her slave. And speaking of Lexi, you know what's better than 1200 new fords in stock at Crossroads Ford and Fuqua Verena? Absolutely nothing.

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Shocking revelation. She's not really into job commitment, but does like the idea of being in a relationship. Lexi, find worth in yourself. You can't just fuck a rich senior for five years and then slit his throat. His family and the board will know that it was you. You have to have a better plan in life. Although, I do think that it'll work out. She has gigantic boobs and a sassy attitude. She'll get some simpt to just pay for her entire existence. I think she's emotionally mature.

And I think, if I would look in another dimension or if I didn't have Shari in the kid. You would have sex with Lexi? Oh my God. I can take your wife and bitch. I dick her down and I think I can make her cool. You would dick her down and you would make her cool. I could fix her. You should have met my wife when I first met her.

Hey, that's okay. That's the end turns you into even more of a douchebag. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Jesus. I would dick her down and make her cool. Am I taking crazy pills? You normally are. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Oh, my God.

Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Oh, my God.

Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Oh, my God.

Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Not true. All right, so I love Courtney and Katie so much. There's this beautiful mom in between the two of them. I completely ship their friendship. I love their relationship. And they're my two favorite people on the show. It's not one that endures though. Once they go on some other boat and start folding towels or swathing that thing, they won't be calling each other

telling them they love each other. No, it's too fickle at times spent together, but I do think that they are genuine and they're I generally call these conversations coke lies all this bonding and stuff. I dick you were gonna say each other. Oh no, I It's it's like that scene from Boogie nights when the red head is talking with the blonde hair girl and they're talking about all their business Ideas are you a Julian Moore? Yeah, and who's the other guy forget it? But they're coke lies Heather. Yeah, so they're yeah Heather's down now no juicy scoop I know you people are slamming your steering wheel right now roller skate girl whatever it was in

Austin powers Heather Graham Heather Graham the point is no is that when you're drunk off your fucking head you start sharing the same things of these platitudes I've loved you we We're going to be friends forever. Now you're not six weeks from now. You're going to be on another fucking boat. You'll be banging some other person. Yeah, these are real relationships in a general. Another gram. It's other gram. In a general boat setting, I think you're right. They would drift apart and just find someone new to glob on to because they're sad existence. And if they're alone alone they'll kill themselves. But in this setting, these reality TV shows become these fraternities where they get put

in the sit, like they're gonna be sitting next to each other on galley talk, getting fucked up and having to blast for years to go. That's a good point. It's, it's changed, it's just like, for example, Kate Chastain and Courtney Skippon. They are, they're super tight to this thing. All right, so for some reason, the crew asks David to give a toast. and Courtney Skippah. They are super tight to this thing. They are super tight to this thing. All right, so for some reason, the crew asks David to give a toast.

You call that a toast? I call the verbal blowjob. How ridiculous that was. I thought it was pretty funny actually. The verbal blowjob. Mm-hmm. All right, well. I suck in everybody off.

It does bloom beautiful drama. He raises, David Rass's spaz a little bit about his early departure. And that's when Lexi takes the opportunity to shit on rightly so. Chef Spaz were faking a knee injury beginning of the season. But seed planted for the sea rats to implode.

Yeah, yes, yes, yes. Hi, yes, yes, yes. When David Razz spaz, that was my favorite part of the speech though, because he said when someone had a little sorny, and he just shot him this glance that I thought was great comedic, physical comedy. David endeared me in this moment.

I was like, maybe he does have a chance with that. F***. I don't know why he said it. There's going to have to be multiple beeps on that, or he's going to look like the real pig on this podcast. I don't know why I'm so weed, I have to be multiple beeps on that. Or he's gonna look like the real pig on this podcast. I don't know why I'm so we do. I don't think the beeps will help. I think we thought the audience will know.

He said something bad about it. That's okay. What did I say? The ****. No, but before that, what led up to it? I didn't have to punch you. I don't know, but we do have to move on. So Delaney and Malia have a little chat.

Very awkward. Malia tries to give her some advice, but this doesn't take because Malia, it doesn't matter. What you're saying, she doesn't care about how to make it in this industry. Malia, she's gonna be on the voice next year. Yeah, you're talking about. She's gonna be on the voice next year.

Yeah, you're talking about. She's gonna be in the first round of America's Got Talent. And Simon's gonna be very uncomfortable. And so we'll howe. I want to do also a meanwhile, forgive me, if you're cold. Meanwhile, Lexi thinks all this stuff and fawning over she has spaz is fake.

Lexi, they're fake with you too. Yeah. They all think you're a crazy ****. But you're still employed here. And also, it's how humans get along with one another. You're fake. Yes, it's social lying. And also Lexi, you're fake with everybody too. You hate everyone. You're a demon. So let's get back to the boat. The Malia talking to Delaney about her resume thing, that like not the time or place Malia. And then Malia was like, oh my God, she's just one of these people that doesn't want to try to listen.

It's her last night on the boat with these people. Yes, shut up. Last night out. Yes, shut the fuck up. Well, my only thing is like Malia's sitting next to her. What are you going to talk to her? Malia about, and there's also a pretty big elephant in the room and the like the whole Hey, so you said you were a deckhand

You can't throw a fucking rope Carnie is can do that There's plenty of talk to her about be a group sex be like hey, how about ours, right? I? Have a personal story very quick How about what? R's. What? R's.

The letter R. I don't get it moving on. Delani has radicism and she says, oh, got it. Okay, all right. Okay, I like that. Yeah, that's funny. Fist bump them. Yeah, no, no, I'm okay. I'm okay, I like that. Yeah, that's funny. That fist bump them. Yeah, no, no, I'm okay.

I'm an armor. I actually have personal experience with firing someone and then attempting to do an exit interview. In a report, yes. And so this guy I'm pretty sure he took my tour bus in the morning because I saw him drive in as I was driving into work with one of the tour buses. Pretty sure he was going to pick up drugs or something.

So I confronted him with it. Something to smoke on top of aluminum foil. Yeah, and I told him, I have to fire you. So you're fired, give me your keys. He handed me the keys and I said, now the reason why I'm doing this, he said save it. Yeah. And then he walked off. Love that guy.

I was like, he made a good point. Yeah. But don't you want some advice that I'm a few on you? Hey, don't take the work vehicle to do drugs. All right, so Let's get back to the boat. Lexi says she's over it and that she's going to bed good Go eat chili and go to sleep While she is downstairs over-sulting her beef

We finally get a sailing yacht ball of Snakes the girls are doing hot stuff David and Delaney are doing hot stuff and right as David has enough liquid courage to Convince himself that he can make a move on Delaney. He eats a CC's pizza amount of shit This was so funny. Yeah. Because we we saw him fall in teases earlier on in the season, but we did not have the context that this was going to be his mood. Yeah. You know, this was the time when he was going to go. This should be on that, the MTV, that network. They have one show that they run for. 24th. Yeah, yeah.

It's longs there. So what is this late of programming this quarter? Well, Monday through Sunday, we've got ridiculousness from 6 a.m. to 10. And then we've got the baking version of ridiculousness, where it's cooking mishaps for an hour. And then we've got more ridiculousness. And then on Tuesdays we have one episode of Teen Mom, but aside from that it's just Rob and the gang. Okay, so we get typical sea rat anxiety from Katie here.

I love her mom. She's like, you've been drinking just go to bed. Go to sleep. All right. It's the, it's the, by the way, the rare sea rat that has a parental shoulder to cry. Yes. Well, it's a mother. I didn't hear the dad behind there going, who are you talking to? I said a not, not multiple. He said a, yeah. But this is case in point.

If you're thinking, just kind of bad. If you're thinking to get into this industry and I use that word industry, lose thing. Know that you should be out of it by 26. No future aspirations into your 30s. But that begs the question, what kind of CV is that if you're out of the industry? It's almost like, don't go into it. Now, you go into it to get some free vacations and bang some hot people and have some fun and get your Instagram cook cooking. You know, this isn't a career. Folding towels is in a career. You know, it's service is a career.

It's just a niche form. But it has, you know, it's pros and it's good. Still in typical services, you service jobs, you go to fucking, I don't know, you work at the hotel folding towers. And then 20 minutes later, you drive home and hang out with your kids. Right, but you're not in Croatia, you know, there are pros and cons to it.

That gets old. That gets old. It does get old. Do I see rats have sea rat anxiety? It's, it's, it's, it's what I was making. It's a kin to when I, I began my career in retail. I, I, I was a cop. You say career in retail?

Yeah, I began a career in retail. And this is why it's a kin-dillon, because you wouldn't say a career in yachting. So I didn't have a college degree. I dropped out to play online poker. Online poker got shut down, and I had to get a job at the Edibbury Sports Story. And once you get there,

and you're affable and you're competent, and you're much more capable than the rest of the people working on. Up our management. Management will then start trying to groom you as a manager. And you have to make a very specific decision. It's a fork in the road, Mo. You got to light the store on fire.

Good fire for ours. Am I going to be a lifelong retail person and one day aspire to be a district manager? Making 110K. I mean, benefits, 110K. That's a district manager, making 110 cake. I mean, benefits, 110 cake. That's $1 million in Eden Prairie. Eden Prairie is actually expensive and affluent. It's their cake eaters.

They're cake eaters. Or would you live in your car for two weeks and work for barely minimum wage for a podcast? For four years. And I chose that route. I don't know how that works out. Yeah, what a foolish move on your part you've been eating cake and even prairie so let's get to the snack table

late-night drama Matt and Lexi are jabbing it one another a little bit I don't know if you guys want to cover this Z Z, the Z like launching into Lexi when he, she's like, you are a good chef, he's like, no, he's a good human. That was my, he's not just a basic chef, he's amazing human being. And Lexi, I love her. She's like, what are you doing? Be like fucking Kat and Savahel right now.

And Pat has often said, Captain Savahel, once again, someone's listing, someone's the time, doesn't match up unless Lexi was watching the show before and then listening to the company. But I'm like, is he get the fuck out of here? Let him fight. Yeah. I said at the top of the show, give her a knife or a sword

because she is a woman. And then give him a small knife and then say, go at it. Okay, so speaking of that, like Roman times. You know, that, I don't want to say it's misogynistic because women are, you know, they're usually weaker than men. Oh, she'd kill us fast.

Physically. I don't think there is one out of a hundred hypothetical battles regardless of neutral field, home field, whatever weapons, Lexi will always defeat Matt and hand to hand combat. I always always every single time they could give Chef Spaza a mace. They could give him a gatling gun and she would belittle him until he took his hand off the trigger and then she'd beat the shit out

of them. Is best case his best case scenario is they give him a jacket full of C4 and he blows them both up. He's not. He's not the only one walking out of there. Yeah, he's, we're getting pretty mad. Oh, you talk about people dying all the time, Dullet. I know, but that's my lane. I shant to miss an opportunity to bring up the dark night. It would be just like when the Joker broke the pool stick in half and he was like, you guys figure it out.

Yeah. Whoever lends. I need one member of it in my team. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, exactly. We've only got room for one. All right, so Delaney says, I have two cheat-outs. Pressive expansion.

And I plan on wearing one of them, which is very, this is an awkward point. She's a little drunk, the night's winding down. And this is like a kind of what's with your energy right now moment. Like read the room, we're going to sleep. Leave it to Courtney to make her feel right at home.

She hops in the second sheet of costume, she starts summer-salting around the boat, not since Colin, have I loved someone as much as Courtney? Which he did that summer-salt and ran into that cabinet. Oh my God. She's amazing. But I did a spectate when I was watching. Yeah. And it was the first of there was a one later. I don't want to get in my

self or when she did. But no, the the onesie I didn't think about that at the time. But that's such a great point. No one was prepared for that. Everybody's trying to stuff their face, go to bed. But she's like, I brought this onesie. I thought I was going to be here longer. This is, it's now or never. Yeah, exactly. Yeah.

She well played. I mean, well planned too. I mean, she came here with bits. Yeah. Yeah. She grew up sex. One Zs. Yeah.

Look at me. I'm going to be on TV. Anything else? Yes. Yes. Yeah. How do we end the night? Dave gets shot down. Yeah. Well, he thinks he's going to lay some pipe. And I don't think he realizes that she's talking to him

because she needs a storyline, not a romance. Yes. Wow. She good. Yes. She's going to look back in this. She would have been like, oh, fuck. It would have been great TV if I fuck David. I didn't know you so pathetic. Still time.

Better TV to hypnotize him and then yank the pendulum away from him. But that was a hilarious part also when she was like, okay, guys, I'm going to bed and there is Zee and David were in the room and they just like stumbled up the stairs and like, you know, what a win man. Delaney, can you help my friend with what? I'm going to sleep. He seems fine. All right, next day, fuck it.

That's morning. Delaney's woken up, chipper and ready to be on television. Lexi is a fucking bummer and needs to get off the show. I brought this up earlier. I would much rather have Lexi or Delaney at this point. Um, then Lexi, Lexi had her blow up, um, you know, Delaney may turn Lloyd straight and she'll fuck up everything work related that she does. So this is a no brainer. Uh, can I do some audio that I think has been leaked? that she does. So this is a no-brainer. Can I do some audio that I think has been leaked? It's between the producers talking to Delaney, making a deal that she can stay on the show

if she does XYZ. All right, this is the producer. His name's Todd. Who is someone Delaney here? You are. Good to know. I'll be Katie. Okay. I'm not your typical TV show. Hey, it's a beat-top crap. Oh yeah. Delaney, come on over here. It's Todd, EP. I'm not your typical T-Shirt. Hey, hey, it's a beat-top craft. Oh, yeah.

Delaney, come on over. It's Todd, EP. I'm the guy who runs all the storylines, and you know that. Hi, Todd. You know, you understand how the biz works, right? Okay, so the plan is to get you off this boat tomorrow because Katie fired you. Why? Well, because Katie fired you, so we got him.

You know, it's her, it was her decision. Did she fire me, though? Well, kind of she did. Regardless, you're not going to be on the boat tomorrow. There's something that can be done though, right? Mm-hmm. Yeah, there is actually. I'm glad you asked. If you...

Because I'll do... Enn me. Will you fuck Deccan Dave? Which one is that? The one that, with the real big teeth. Yes. Okay, he's dead. You're in, kid.

Well, I'm just a big side. It's important to remind the audience. I'm how good we are at this I'm gonna put my ear buds in do 15 minutes on the shoulders then finish me off. Okay, Jesus Christ We are nasty all right Is that what Bob crafts audio said he got caught at like It was just me that's impractical. No, it wasn't a reenactment. Oh Jesus. As we were playing the chiefs, it's a very stressful game. All right, so let's get to Z and Coco. Lloyd does some very smart interference and asks hypothetically speaking.

Do you want to talk about Coco? Uh, yeah, apologies, he's errors and emissions. Uh, her alter ego is Courtney. Chloe. Her alter ego is Chloe. Coco is what she always wanted to be called and now they call her that. I'm sorry Dylan, you were correct.

No, I was also wrong to. I said her drunk name was Chelsea. Uh, Mayacolpa moving on. Some hilarious baby barnacle made a post and they were like explaining to me where he went wrong. But then they said, and it's Delani, but it's not Delani. That was a joke.

Go to join us on Facebook.com. So as I said, Lloyd, this is very, very smart thing that he does. This is a very smart thing that he does. He asks, hypothetically speaking, if there were roses and chocolates coming, would you want them? To which she says, you know, no, not really. And how much did we bet on this? Because I bet you both, right? It's 50 bucks, I think.

50 bucks each. All right. So I think I got a hundred dollars coming. Wait a minute. It's not the end of the season yet. That's true, but I think I got a hundred dollars coming my way. So back to the boat. I feel so bad about myself when I got a hundred dollars come in my way. Wait a minute, it's not the end of the season yet. That's true, but I think I got a hundred dollars come in my way. So back to the boat. I feel so bad about myself when I lose a bet.

I need to just remind. You lose bets constantly. And I constantly feel bad, but then I win. And I'm like, this is what it's all for. And that is gambling addiction, everybody. I bet they still fuck. All right, so back to the boat. Z is black out.

And Lloyd says, hey, Nick the roses to which Zeus says Now fuck it. I'm gonna keep them See heat his heat his advice. So we head to the waterfalls. There is a fun car and a not fun car In a use suspects type twist Lexi is in the not fun car type twist, Lexi is in the not fun car. We get a little jaunt down memory lane once we arrive at the waterfalls. Remember that Malia almost married a serial killer lizard in Adam and then we get to the dinner table. Amidst stunning waterfalls we have a heavy wake belt between Lexi and Matt. Before that, I love Delaney's realization

that she made friends with the wrong person. She's like, I can't believe the hot black girl isn't the cool one. And now I'm getting stuck being made to look like a fool because I befriended the parietan. So this is the pre heavyweight bow to actually, because we have three fights between Lexi and Matt this episode.

The second one, the two towers of the evening, is this at lunch. He starts it, by the way. Yeah, it's tough to break this down, because they just say horrible things to one another and then go on to the next, you know, ring. But he started. I'm sorry. How did he start it? What did he say again? He made the jab about unless Lexi leaves and you stay. Oh, yeah. He's like, you should, you should go, which

that Lexi's already thin skinned. I love and my favorite part about this was that Delaney kind of perks up. She's like, I could stay. Lexi was complaining about how many days we have left. Yeah, thickest theus Delaney and Lexi are. Lexi, she'd slit your throat in the middle of the night if that producer Pat was roleplaying to older two. This is when I stopped feeling bad for Matt because he was, like I said,

he was started like, oh, maybe he's nice, kind, he's anxiety, but then this is what like a loser does. He's like, oh, people are liking me, they're hamming it up, no one likes Lexi, I'm gonna take a dig at her. Everybody's gonna fucking love this. Cool kids, don't bully. I was thinking, what is the purpose of this?

Don't we wanna have a nice dinner? Do we really wanna spend it? Cause you don't know what Lexi will do. I mean I think she's she's capable of throwing a plate at your head when you're looking. Oh, 100%. If there were not cameras there that could capture. She said hard evidence of her assaulting somebody she would have done it five weeks ago. Yeah. Luckily there were cameras that captured her saying just that. Yes. And my favorite is Malia going, hey guys, how cool are these cats? Well, Malia seems like, because she's a veteran of TV.

She even set it up. She's like, ah, going out to dinner. These two idiots are going to fight. Yeah. Going dinner. Well, so let's just fast forward to the big blow up. First, Lexi falls asleep in the car, wakes up, and thinks that she got kidnapped.

But anything, what do you, what? Just to my point about Matt, he thinks he's befriending people by making fun of the weak link, but it reminded me of Adam Sandler, Billy Madison, where he's like, kid can't even read. And everybody's like, what the fuck? He's a child, that's not funny. Yeah, yeah. Everybody's like, we all hate Lexi, no, she doesn't wanna be here. It took a lot of courage for you to even come out today. She, it does take a lot of courage.

You can see that she really doesn't wanna be around these people anymore. Kason point to a half hour nap in the van, waking up, thinking. With a mascot, thinking you've been kidnapped. You can just see how unhappy and mean she is when Delaney's like, come on it's time to go and she's like leave me Like it's just like oh god. I would argue why go out Lexi You're not enjoying your services down the boat dark storm in her heart. Well our father just died too much going

I know I know we I know. I know. We've talked about that before just because your father passes away doesn't mean that you, you know, you're going to be a monster. Yes, exactly. So dinner time, they continue attacking one another and that is when Lexi just takes the muzzle off completely. She starts calling Matt the R word and that is when Lloyd begins shaking. To catch up, Mulea, just say it's the one sentence she said, she says, what happened to you?

That was crazy. Yeah, crazy because Lloyd is literally having convulsions. That's a typical question to ask someone. You go, why are you shaking? You don't say what happened to you. She felt there's some early childhood trauma. I think she was just wondering what happened that night. I don't think that she was... When you put it in present tense? I don't know.

Different, different of opinion of what she was asking. But it does not really matter because... I don't want to shit on Lloyd. But my fucking God. Are you wouldn't want him on the front line of a of a war? Why fucking God? I don't want to come across as not sensitive or lacking empathy, but Lloyd. I would also suggest to him before we like blame it on like PTSD and the R word drinking you. He was sitting there shaking with a red bull in his hand. He's like,

sorry, I just get a little anxious. Yeah. Mental health. Check out that video. I just did a hilarious physical comedy. Mental, you did a hilarious physical comedy. He's like, Reggie, he's a fucking gym ballu-sh-y. I'll just say gym carry. That was all tight. Okay, so mental health has taken a really big hit this year.

Do you mean people are talking about it constantly and propping up people as heroes when they're not I mean just this We are living in soft times. I am soft. I am as soft as anyone should be you see how he's I'm not gonna say evolved But he's kind of turned the corner. We used to make fun of him for stuff like this. And now he's being the bully. You used to make fun of me for shaking and crying about someone using our... I would say the same thing you're saying now about somebody, like, Pat, you're being so mean.

Stop being so masculine. I'm just growing impatient with it. It's just what happens with age. It's fucking ridiculous. Because you realize you're gonna die. I don't wanna, I don't wanna, you know, I don't wanna be fucking MacArthur here, but Lloyd, be a fucking man.

It's crazy. It's good we're talking about these things now, but it seems like a too many of people are talking about I think is your point. Because when I was a kid, I got depressed when I was like 13. I didn't know how to tell. It's not like my mom was gonna ask me like, hey, why are you in your room sleeping till noon every day?

Or something like that? I didn't know what it was until I started watching Oprah during daytime and she used to have a bunch of people on. Sure. Talk about depression. I'm like, oh my God, there's other people besides me. And it's very important. We should be talking about depression.

It's important to shine a light on mental health, but also who cares, you're fucking depressed. Everybody gets fucking depressed. You don't need to go see a therapist now Go to the bar and order a vodka tonic Have a drink and then think on why you're unhappy and then fix it and also and don't shake when someone uses the R word Leave the table holy shit and also before you convince yourself that you have clinical Depression and start taking meds to know to numb any feeling you could possibly have. Right. Treat your body right, get in a routine, exercise daily.

Alright. Clean. I'm not kidding. Try those things first. And if you're still want to fucking hang yourself, then do it. And that ends the Jaka Willink hour on mental health. And that ends our podcast as well. Guys, jump in the iTunes ratings reviews. Leave five stars about our advocacy and join us on Patreon at patreon.com slash another podcast

network. All three five stars, we're gonna lose 500 lists. That was the best episode. Also, please go to to YouTube be the thousands subscriber I am Dylan saying goodbye next say goodbye red polo goodbye Pat say good bye bye The best best best best best best best best best

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