Kill James Bond! - Espresso Martinis from a Trough | Below Deck Med S7 E11

Episode Date: September 20, 2022

Dylan, Nick and Pat are back to talk how Home is Gotham, yoga, cliffhangers, the order of specialty shots, the correct glassware, too much anchor, too much anchor, ratting, snitching, mutinies, survival, the ick and even more from Bravo's Below Deck.The full season of Below Deck Down Under recaps is ALREADY available only on our Patreon at https://Patreon.com/AnotherPodcastNetworkAlso available is our coverage of Below Deck Sailing and Love is Blind seasons 1 and 2 for both shows!Check out our merch!https://anothermerchstore.comWe also cover Bachelor Nation very week on Another Bachelor Podcasthttps://bit.ly/AnotherBachelorPodcast_YouTubeThis show is part of the Spreaker Prime Network, if you are interested in advertising on this podcast, contact us at https://www.spreaker.com/show/5727246/advertisement

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Shop these and more great gifts now at Samsung.com. The revolting beverages are served and Jason and I love that there is an order in which these are supposed to be consumed too. It's classless if you do it out of order. Welcome aboard another brand spanking episode of another below deck podcast. My name is Dylan. I'm subtle up next to one real necklace Davis. Oh, hey matey. Pat Purspot is over there behind my glasses. Permission to come aboard.

Permission granted. Okay, so hope everybody has listened to the Dave interview at this point. If not, go on your phone and like, scroll up a little. Go to the episode before this. Cause it's an amazing episode. And also go to YouTube and watch it. Dave texted us after and he said we changed him as a man and we allowed him

to look at situations in a different life so good on us fellas. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Wow. No, really, we are life changing. Thanks very much Dave for coming on. And also you're welcome and also update. The war with bravo seems to have cooled a little bit. Listen, we're going to cold war. They didn't like that. It's a war of attrition. We're dealing with, um, uh, PR. Oh, I was going to say Ramsey Bolton. Oh, okay. That's why I quit Bravo to.

Bolton. Okay. That's why I equate Bravo to. All right. Anyways, maybe that's a little harsh, but let's get into below deck. But before we do that, let's get into. Did I do a bad job? Are we done with public service announcements? No, we got to sell Patreon, dude. I got to make some money. Patreon.com, social podcast network. We're going to, we were, we were, we're covering Bachelor in Paradise. Oh, wow. Yeah, man, it's been a long day. And that was tough to get out. It was, I didn't even think of the show. I was struggling to gather with my thoughts.

I'm still in right now. Help me out, Dylan, please. Right, so there's great stuff of Patreon. We are Nick. I'm gonna say this trepidaciously. Stop me if I am wrong. W believe it if it's bad, but also next week are another bachelor podcast feed is going to be moving to a whole new show Or is that two weeks? Two weeks were about to make a big announcement that that show is getting rebranded say tuned for that

You're all about it. It's gonna be probably a podcast about bad TV. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And one of the things we may cover is the three episodes of Love is Blind after the Alter, which drops on Netflix September 16th. Yeah, we might cover that. So public service announcements are over. Let's get into thoughts and pots. Pat, what are you taking away? I didn't really enjoy this episode. Too much anchor stuff. first half, really weighed down the episode. Nice, you're welcome. Did you mean it? Yeah.

And then, I mean, some of the drama between Kyle and Natasha and Natalia, I guess that was kind of interesting. I don't know. I don't know. Natalia's gone down a few points in the TV girlfriend department because she's a fucking snitch, you know? Whoa, grumpy pants. I call it as I see it, my friends.

I'm going to give it a, it's just a middle episode. We're getting close to the end here. I think there's like four more. Yeah. So there's maybe not that much story to tell. I don't know. Four knots. You drinking Freeze.

No, this is homemade but most of it. No, no, I know, but what's a champagne called, freezer? No, it's called, uh... What is that stuff called? I have the bottle. It's in an opaque black bottle. Frigianne. Frigianne.

Frigianne. Besides, it's in the middle of the road. It's fine, champagne. It's fine, mate. It's in at my wedding. The other thing's a dog. Frigianne. Uh, I...

Abijon, Frigianne. Little tiny poudou. Pat believed too much anchor way down this episode, love the pun. I thought too much anger way down this episode. We've talked in the past how when these workplaces get so toxic, it almost gives you just a bad feeling and well the drama was exciting, it's good, the inner workings, I don't know, I didn't feel good after it. But that said, I like the drama was exciting, it's good, the inner workings, I don't know, I didn't feel good after it. But that said, I like the drama, I completely disagree on who's at fault with the whole Natalia situation.

At some point, ratting is, I mean, it's not ratting, it's fucking, I don't know what it is, it's survival. Saving. Ratting to survive yourself, so I guess you're still right, but still, I feel like it was necessary 72 knots. You know, um, heroism, true heroism has been defined as a kind of insanity. Think about being a billionaire of Vingelante going out without a gun to stop criminals. That's exactly. So people rush to danger where our natural instincts would tell us to back away, right? Going up against the sassy force that is Kyle and Natasha coupled together, powers enhancing one another. It's an insane thing to do. It's almost a losing battle most of

the time. So I feel as though we've got a real William Wallace on our hands here in Natalia, okay? So shame on you for calling her a rat even though she is a bit of a rat. They call herself a rat. I know, but it's nuanced, okay? I'm very sorry for that roundabout that I had no idea where I was going, but you know what? It's freaking 90 pots. I liked it. Home is Gotham, Kyle, and Natalia, or the criminals that are doing the street.

The Joker and Natalia is Batman criminals that are ruining the street. And Natalia is Batman. The Sassy gay one. You had something to say, right? Oh, no, no, so let's get into the show because we start off on a real cliffhanger. So, Namaste, we begin where we left off with the little yoga and life threatening anchor untangling. Hands down my least favorite trope of below deck and I've

honestly kind of fucking had enough of it. Bravo storm yeah lose a leg by kicking that anchor answer no Bravo we know you listen stop it stop doing it I don't want to see a docking I don't want to see a docking. I don't want to see an anchor untangling unless somebody is fucking losing a limb or getting a cut that needs sutures. We need a little blood. I need to move a little bit.

When nothing happens, don't feel the need to show it. It's just a docking. He just went down and kicked the anchor. It's not good docking. He just went down and kicked the anchor. It's not good. TV 85 pots. Hey, I want to talk about these anchors for a second. Yeah. That technology they're using is like, I don't know, like at least 500 years old. Yeah, dropping a heavy thing into the water to weigh the boat down to keep it stationary.

I think we'd have an upgrade after 500 years. Yeah, Patrick, I mean mean if it ain't, but broke down, fixed it, you know. It's not all the time. It's like Pat, how old is the wheel? You know? How old's the wheel? Even older than 500 years, maybe 600 years old, you know?

Let me sink in. So let's move on to a set. Stenic is so lost in thought. No, yeah, cause I was trying to think of maybe there could be some type of, you were trying to engineer a new invention to weigh a boat down and you have no fucking experience in the nautical world. There's no way you could possibly come up. I should be slapped in the face.

I think that the upgrade is those fucking stabilizers that almost kill everybody every other. Right, right, right. Can I tell you? Yeah. I was just about to give up as you noticed me deep and thought, but I was heading to sort of, some sort of Disney Pixar's up type situation where instead of weighing it down, you lift it up, but that wouldn't stop it from moving at all. You know, that movie's overrated except for that first six minutes, that montage of the

entire life of that wonderful couple that their dreams were never fulfilled and rather than get to travel to England and go on new adventures, they were stuck down by greed and held down by the man while they were surrounded by buildings in that tiny little house and then she dies and then he's just an angry old codger. It's essentially cast away, but in the sky. Is that a correct retelling of that little prologue to that film?

I paraphrase the first six minutes, but it is wonderful. You will be crying. They didn't get to travel. They never got to travel. They kept showing them putting their savings into like a bucket, and then it shows something would break in the house, and then they got to take the coins. Oh, wow, wow.

Before you know it, they're both 60. They never got to do anything. They spent their lives with them. Well, that dog can talk though. Squirrel. All right, so moving on to a sad state of affairs. Kyle and Natasha have seemed to join forces exponentially expanding the power of SAS.

And dare I say evil aboard home. The two of them are talking about napping and wailing about Frank when Natalia asks if Kyle has gotten anything done today. Now, Natalia a little forward with the accusations of laziness, but also, I see a way of freech to turn a point with Kyle. He's very confident in the foundation that he stands upon that being you know him being good at his job And also being the person who has befriended and allied Ursula in human form His boss. It's a strong political move, but she's a poison root with a honey tip It's just not a good idea. He's he's too high on his own supply. I I said I agree with you

But except for the fact that he can't handle her He hasn't just befriended her. He has attached fingers to his strings and put her on the end of he is man You go from the back, right? That was him that one little scene where it's like oh, I guess I just blew smoke up your ass He was like, yeah, you're a good leader. You don't make me do shit, right? He's got her in the palm of his hand and it's gonna be trouble It's gonna be trouble Natasha will be the one to suffer the constant well I like Kyle lot but I want to talk to this young man because in fact when Natalia did confront him saying what have you done on the boat this

morning said what have I been doing I talked to Frank all morning bitch right right is he very young Kyle a friend all right so um Kyle says Natalia, my sweet dear, is a huge martyr. Bitchy thing to say, and almost indecisurable with that accent. I rewound it and was like, oh, that makes sense. He's being sarcastic and mean. So Natalia responds in kind, I want to punch you in your penis. Hilarious made better with a little melody.

So let's get to Indiana J having more issues with the debt crew. He tells Courtney that she's wrong about ropes and lines and whatnot. And they see this is like, I don't want to get, I don't think the show needs to be fixed like the bachelor. Right, right, the bachelor has gaping fucking,

that splits and it's, it's bad. But I just don't know, even this with the deck crew, it's just not really moving the needle that well. Well, it's the senseless bickering that everybody that is in a TV show has to be subjected to in a corporate work environment all day. I don't want to put on my TV show. And here the same bickering that I have to go pretend I'm taking a shit to avoid hearing in the kitchen. Well, I'm okay. I don't know why I'm okay if it happens below deck,

maybe because it's titular, you know, but above deck it's just not really moving forward. Well, I'm not attracted to anybody on the deck. Well, Ziza hands him, right? He's all right. If they, not really. I mean, if they not attracted to anybody on the deck. Zizahansom. He's all right. If they, if they were good, if they were better looking people, I might be, remember how swooped up we were

in the drama with Riley, the Red Snapper? That was fun. That held down that anchor, the entire show. That was fun to watch our season. Well, you see you're putting me in a, and she banged that Tyler or that guy who, you're putting me in a tough spot, you know? Cause I don't know where you're going with it.

I do know where he's going. Great time. How to blast. No, I don't think you do know. I do know where where you're going with it, but I'm not going to say it because I'm not going to be tricked into it because it'll sound mean. Yep. Gonna leave that alone. More mystery, less history. My problem with this little above deck thing, I'm fine, we're seeing the drama, and we can't take a turn where we hate all the staple aspects of the show. Right, yeah, that's right. We can't do that yet.

We can't do that. I push back against convention, though, Nicky. It's true, but we just have, we got years to bleed this thing out. So come on, stay positive. What a show this show is, it's so good. My problem with it was Indiana J, Jason, comparing, saying, it's not, it's so good. My problem with it was Indiana J. Jason is saying, it's not like it's complicated,

it's not the Dewey Desmos system. You guys know my passion for local libraries. It is. Exactly. No, Nick. The point of the Dewey Desmos system is the beauty of its simplicity. Any old Joe should be able to figure it out, so I didn't like him disrespecting me. Nick, I completely disagree when they tried to teach me how that all works in the fifth grade.

This, uh, this 10 year old was really confused. That is because you have a thing in your brain where not only do you turn off, but you have an aversion to things you don't want to learn. Site Uber, site postmates, site the Dewey Desmosis. Hey, this isn't an opportunity for you to, uh, uh, her- Wait,. Like a kind of finish. Three very, very simple things. Can I say something I've been ruminating on and I don't want to hurt anybody's feelings, but I fear and the Dewey Decimal thing

is really adding to it that you may be dyslexic. No, that's why you can't even, you can't like, you look at the way we wrote. I wrote down the exact same note. He says, you know, he uses the Dewewey decimal system as an exhibit for a difficult task It just doesn't make sense and also he says I'd rather do that than fight with the crew Did you fight with the fracking crew all the time? What are you talking about? This isn't a rarity I'd rather alpha but dies than do most things

So they leave a pretty awkward landing of that line in the OTF. I think he's going to start getting a bad at it. So be cured salmon and a sous vide egg, Kyle doesn't pronounce that word right. And whole wheat toast is what is for breakfast. One of the women says when in multi eat your salmon, which was a silly thing to say for the sake of saying something. And then in that same vein, one of these women says, people who weren't born with technology are way more addicted to it. And that's just an insanely idiotic thing to say. I'm sure there are 400 million studies disproving that comment.

I don't know why that triggered me. It was just so dumb. Well, the problem I had was kind of the hypocrisy of this as someone's calling technology the devil while simultaneously taking a picture of their eggs Benny. I don't know. Yeah, but I don't know. I feel as though if you've been cradle to grave with Tim Cook and Steve Jobs, you're probably going to be more addicted to technology than us old folks who used to run outside and throw rocks at animals. Well, the certain podcasters, uh, uh, older family member got addicted to

Facebook. I've been told. So, uh, in your family, uh, maybe me or someone else in this room that told us that story. Uh, is that you're talking about? Are you talking about Nick? She's not, uh, she, you, you said that she was like addicted to no No, what I said was Facebook made we're talking about next grandma Facebook made her feel bad She wasn't scrolling 24-7 I got you but like when she would go on there. She'd be like I don't I'd turn that thing off I didn't like it was probably in 2020 it was the political year got really ugly on those things It's really just honestly just her relatives who aren't dead going on trips

Okay, so we run up social media's evil check out APS I've got I've got the next next horseman of the social media apocalypse. I'm so excited and sad to get there subscribe to that show So Dave runs up the Sasha what the same and with Natasha. He says anything for you, Tosh. Dave, enough right? That's lunatic shit. Right. Stop. The guests do water while Tosh gets more messages from her boyfriend who I know Storm has a lot of like alcoholic anonymous sayings like if it's not worth doing 100%, it's not worth doing it all. And that can give people the yik,

but what about there's a burning building storm and there's some kids in there? You gotta go a thousand percent. But this? Or don't do it at all. This, eh. I don't think I can make it up to Stas, mate. Oh, well then don't go, let him burn to death.

I mean, it's just a stupid thing to say. This is quite a past girl's predicament you're putting storm in. Well, you gotta go to the extremes to really drive home a point. Right, exactly. I watch Fox News. Why?

I don't watch anything news. Okay. Cause his wife has it on in the back. I told her to stop watching it. CNN in a great political move has decided to go down the middle. It's honestly their plan. They're getting rid of other partisan people.

It's actually smart. Just let Fox kill themselves. He's got to smart. Watch the food network. You'll be a happier person. Now you were saying do? They should have a new food network where they actually cook food and it's not competitions.

Then I would be a happier person. It's called the YouTube. So we, okay, so what I was saying is, storm has these isms that give you the ik. But this x slash current slash soon to be again, x boyfriend. I mean, we thought Dave was bad, you know, this guy is one of the most pathetic men maybe in human history.

He says, we have too much to throw this away. What are you talking about? You know, you have a dog, you have a party house and you have a history of infidelity I hate to break it to you both up, but that's worth fuck all We have too much. Did you did you mention the shared love for parties? So let's get to someone who's also worth fuck all Jason We know that he is a smart cookie so he futures and whatnot

But a board home He is a petulant little asshole who just wants to fight. Storm tells him to put stuff away. And it's always gotta, everything that needs to be corrected is met with some jab. Pushback.

It's just like, just shut up. Just do it, dude. Please. It's getting so annoying watching this guy on TV. And we'd love to talk to him because that would be a fun interview. We probably push back. It's getting so annoying watching this guy on TV. And we'd love to talk to him, because that would be a fun interview. We'd probably push back. What's out.

What's out? I just answered the fucking question. I know, I would really love to talk to Jason. I think we would, you know, get in some belts. We got a little bit of a sea rat history, but man, I wonder if he has possibly a stepdad, and he was an angsty teen, we always push back because that's exactly how he's treating storm.

You're not my real dad. I'll put it away when I have time. Right, right, right. He does treat him like a stepdad. He really does treat him like a stepdad. So we have got to move on, but before we do, let's take a quick break to talk about. Damn, love, damn.

It's time to get sexy, Pat. I'm gonna have to use it tonight because when we do our other podcast, APS, I hope to spend the first 20 minutes talking about an epic fight that the wife had, it involved her father-in-law, our general contractor, Boundaries being crossed. And so we need to burn some of this off and the way we going to do that is with some of Dame's greatest product. What are you going to use? Are you going to use the air? Are you going to use the EVA? Are you going to use some of the pH balanced loobs? Some of the sex oils?

Well, again, my wife is pretty pissed. So we're definitely going to start with the loobs. Okay. You know, and then you might grease her up. You might want to, I'm going to goddamn it. Um, God.

I've said it before, just some of that sex oil, some silk sheets and shaving my entire body down. That's a night, I don't even need a partner. All right, go to dayinproducts.com, enter and promo code below deck to get 15% off. I mean, it's just an unbelievable company. I got an idea. Buy something.

Gonna need a meanwhile. Meanwhile. So the crew, pantry looks like shit. Kyle is forgetting what's in the picture and Storm has a big decision to make. Oh, is this where he meets his girlfriend in that secret, beautiful love nest that they have, that place where Skidmarks are removed?

They're the Lauderoom. No. uh, skid marks are removed, uh, they're, uh, the, uh, the, the lottery. Uh, no. And I, I'm not disputing your estimation of that room, but no, they weren't in there at this point. I don't think so. Uh, more espresso martinis are poured in unsightly wine goblets. And then we head to the beach. First time I've seen that on the show. It's, I mentioned it last week.

Oh yeah. Yeah, I mentioned it last episode. It's disgusting. It's fucking disgusting. But it's disgusting as a, as a smurf blow job shots. No, but if it's an upgrade to it, if a drink is poured in an incorrect vessel, it makes the experience just, it's a distraction that doesn't need to be there. It just takes away from what you're doing.

I'm excited for next charter when they have the guest drink espresso martini out of a giant trough. Yeah, I don't know. It's like if you had a negroni and a pint glass. It's just weird. It's like whoa. Can I tell listeners barnacles? Look, I'm not advocating any drug use here, but let me say this drinking too Expressor martinis is akin to pop and a viky and then taking a rail. I mean, it's not true It makes you happy and it keeps you up. That's not true. You want to know something else that looks really weird? Not in the right vessel. You want to know something else that looks really weird,

not in the right vessel. You ever put milk in a water bottle? It's weird looking. It's weird looking. I cannot remember the last time I drank milk. Just straight milk. You need to live a little. I know, it's been a while.

Milk's delicious. So Dave is not putting pressure on him and Tosh as they go to the beach. Well, he heads to the friend zone. I mean, yes, he's in the friend zone and is quote unquote comfortable with it. Don't lie to yourself. But he's really enjoying their relationship. There's a massive flaw in his thinking and in his language. He says, let's keep it here and let's see where it goes. You know, well, I kind of forget how this expression goes,

but you've not seen the forest for the evil, you know, fungi riddled trees, you know what I mean? Like take a step back, you should be repelling any and all advances from this woman because you're bad for her and she's bad for you. Do not entertain hope. Kill, hope. Kill it. You guys should not be together. Sometimes hope needs to be killed in increments, Dylan. It can't just be just cut off. So, um, who rules the world girls? Um,

not when they shriek like that. No one is trying, no, no one trying to run anything. Has any time to listen to the sounds of a fucking chicken getting tortured? It's fucking crazy that that woman made that noise for that long, a period of time, it's fuck. So, crudely cut sushi is served. A very confusing dinner party is getting set up. We'll find later on in the episode

that it's really just cake and blow chop shots. Yeah. Oh, that's all I have a question here. Hey, Dill, was there a dinner? No, the dinner was three pieces of Sam and Sushi. Mm, okay. And Nitrogen, Yuzu, Sorbet. Get your sea women and you name Tommy Johnny's day.

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Okay, round two. Name something that's not boring. Laundry? Ooh, a book club. Computer solitaire, huh? Ah, sorry. We were looking for Chamba Casino. Ch-ch-ch right, chambacasino.com has over 100 casino style games. Join today and play for free for your chance to redeem some serious prizes. Chamba Casino.com Number two is my law, 18 plus turns and conditions apply, see website for details. What is that stuff called? Liquid nitrogen.

That's what it is. Yeah. That's what it is. That's what it is. Yeah. That's what it is. That's what it is. All right, so we end with said, use usurpee and a little bra stuffing. The bra stuffing, the whole thing discussed to me how we're reducing Dolly Parton, an absolute legend to a pair of old tits. She was so much more than that. She was a philanthropic woman and she is still alive.

And I think yes, but she also had a fantastic voice. And- Wait, I was speaking about her in past tense. And she did a lot for her community. One time, Pat tried to go seer at the Hollywood Bowl, but instead they put an ant down there or something. No, no, no, no. I did a great, amazing segment on PMZ. I think it's episode 57.

That was very Trump of you. It was, it was, it was called exposed. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. It's like exposed. What you need to know is it. I did a great, amazing segment. I did it. She's a loser. Dolly segment. I did it. She's a loser. Dolly Parton, not cool.

She's a loser. Doesn't really say, so if you go see Dolly Parton in concert, she lip syncs the entire concert. And I exposed her with that. So if you want to hear me cover that story and that investigation, is it? Go to Patreon, pay $10 and then search Dolly Parton. And I remember that, Pat, you also said

there were ants performing on it. Well, I got the cheap seats because I thought I could watch her on the mega screen. And because she's lip-syncing, they turned off the mega screen. So I saw an ant play guitar on the screen. Couldn't see her at all. Loser.

Terrible show. Total loser. OK. Ah! I'm glad. I'm glad my grandma's eyes are so bad because one time my sister, as like almost a dying wish of my grandma, dropped like two grand on two tickets

and took my grandma to Dolly Parton. Wow. Probably would have crushed her if she, well, she wouldn't have cared if she was sick. Well, she's said, actually, I would have ruined it for her. Hey, you know she's not really singing right now. Yeah, Nick's sister was on her way to a concert when I called her and told her that Nick was

on heroin and I was worried about him. And she believed him. Yeah, one almost bought a plane ticket. hilarious prank. What is it? She'll punk. Yeah, so the guest get back and Natalia and Z. What's up?

Just the setup that Natalia did. She referenced a white and pig bar that Dolly Parton owns. I've actually been to the white limousine atop the graduate hotel in Nashville. It's a, I love that hotel. To me, in Nashville, I guess. Yeah. I thought it was a beach bar near water.

No. Is that just the theme? The theme was only white and pink that she got from the bar, but this is a rooftop bar or top to graduate. I love graduate hotels. I stayed in one of Minneapolis. You mean, you know, Nash Vegas. Yeah. So, storm, as we mentioned, has a big decision to make, promote his friend, or continue the narrative of women empowerment on this season, and just pick the person right for the job, you know. So, let's get back to the boats, though, lots of fun shenanigans with tits and stuff and guy, right for the job, you know. So, let's get back to the boats though. Lots of funtionant against with tits and stuff

and Guy Fieri and stuff, but do you guys have anything before we get to dinner? Well, I thought that was random that a guest was doing an imitation of Guy Fieri. Was that in some, was there context for that? Thank you for pronouncing his surname, the way that Jody, a Jada De Laurentus produces any in time. I got you Fieri. Right. his surname the way that Jody, Jody De Laurentus produces any entire year.

I got you. Yeah. Right. Um, Yes. Jody, what's your name? Uh, Jody. Uh, where do you live?

A studio city. Oh, really? We're about. Uh, well, uh, Violin and what, uh, hey, uh, what kind of past you, sir? Everything. Oh, I'm having only a little content. It was funny because I was wondering how you were going to bring the Italian accent into the rather like introductory line of questioning.

You had a fool. Why do you change your accent when you talk about Italian food? Yes, there was context for Guy Fieri being there. They requested that the party was going to be commemorative of their two favorite celebrities, pay attention, the Brefford Cheap meetings, that being Dolly Parton and Guyy part and and guy theory and this is a guys and dolls part oh Yeah, listen to the preference. Oh, this isn't it. This is an insight though into why I'm not a huge fan of these charter guests

They're boring. I like them. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, they're boring as fuck and This party is an example of just, it's just convoluted and kind of lame. Like some people are gonna be dolly part and some people are gonna be guy fear. Like what is going on with this party? It's so weird. I don't blame the party on them,

but I thought it was a great, I thought it was a fun party. Finally Bravo mixed it up. They out of their fucking pulle-card white party, fucking black and white. You know what, we're always asking for that, right? So change up, hey, I will say this, just because the audience is always trying to get to know me

and understand the mind of Patty. Top 10 favorite shows that I like to watch during the week, Diner's Driven's in Dives. Probably. What are the other nine? No, I don't want to bore the audience. I like to leave a little more mystery. What number would drivers, divers, and dives be?

In my house that I watch, well, there's beat Bobby Flay. Is Seeking Sister Wives number one? Oh, that's in top three. Seeking Sister Wives. Don't confuse that with sister wives, which I hate that show, with that surfer old bastard who just, a wife just left him. A lot of, made a lot lot of I don't care anymore Yeah, I don't either. Hey, I do want to cut back to the show because there was one note out before we get to dinner service Yeah, which isn't dinner. It's just cake. It's just cake. We get a lot of history Of the sea rats, but Natalia or is it Natasha just discussing the history of her door knobs?

Was that Natasha? What her lunchpales her boobs. Oh Natalia was talking about You said door knobs and then lunchpales. Yeah, and it's like dude dude. That's so fucking unfair I just I just think it's an accurate either though. Yeah How would we ever get to where you needed us to be in that moment? Milk bags. There you go. Fruit but like, you know, knee shooters. Well, knee shooters. The heavies. Okay. Fuck, dude.

I'm not sure if you're gonna get it. Fuck, dude. But yeah, she used to be flatty and addy. Let's counterbalance this. You know what, you know what we should call them? Beautiful mammalian orbs of life and nourishment. Sandy's obsessing on those fucking filthy floors. So you know there's gonna be trouble. Okay, so while the guests are preparing for the upcoming smurf shots and cotton candy bloody marries that Natasha has prepared

in Natalia is letting Coco in on what's been going on. More of the same. Essentially these fuckos don't do nothing but make a mess and this is intercuped with Kyle pretending to pull this cock out for Natalia to either suck or put a ring on. So the revolting beverages are served and Jason and I love that there is an order in which these are supposed to be consumed too. It's classless if you do it out of order. Absolutely classless. Put the Szechuan pepper in your mouth, roll it around, then we want you to taste the meal, okay. We'd like you to suck down the cotton candy smoothie with vodka we've made you and then drink this

fucking toxic blue shot. So Jason continues to be a powder fuck court rats on him and there are exceptions to every rule I I think it's totally fine to rat on Jason. I thought this was a weird one though You did he was he was working. He's wiping the deck. She goes Z did that He goes there was shit on it. I'm gonna do it and then she goes and fuck the tells on him He sucks. He's abrasive. This was one time. He's just trying to work You know, it's very akin to the other instance of ratting that we have and we'll discuss it in depth but not the right

Triggering of the deceit like not a good night to be ratting right Jason has done much worse things Didn't need to go to storm about this one Natal a Natasha and Kyle wore up till five o'clock in the morning Actually, you know, quote unquote working Not the morning to you know Tell Sandy that they're useless pieces of shit. Yeah, hey, I'm sorry, you triggered a memory. How long we've been going? This will take 45 seconds.

I just want to. I think we're fine. Come on, man. Okay, get this. This happened to me in the eighth fucking grade. Me and Davey Clark, we're buddies. We're starting to be insult comics. We're starting to work our act out.

And we were doing it on the school bus. Little triumphs. Yeah, we sit on, some people to work our act out. We were doing it on the school bus. Little triumphs. Yeah, we sit on, some people would call us bullies. Little wrecked. So as the kids would exit the school bus on the way home. Little Rodney. Davie and me, we were working on our act. You know, we'd have something to say

about certain individuals as they left the bus. Hey, bus driver, where'd you get those knee shooters? What's on second? Yeah, yeah yeah so uh you know and uh so i decide i'm gonna break up the act i don't like this where it's going i'm feeling too negative right i'm probably i don't know ten seconds okay so i say i'm not doing this act anymore i'm think i'm hurting people's lives well wow so i end the act a month later a month later the school

bus driver calls my mother and says, Pat, can't come on the bus anymore. Oh, okay. And my mom says, hey, I heard you've been in an asshole on the bus, you can't go on the bus anymore, I'm pissed, because now I gotta pick you up, you're a fucker, and now you're grounded. And I said, wait a minute, I cut that act,

I cut that shit out a month ago. You can't fucking retro, what do you call it? Retroactively. Retroactively fucking find me. For the school bus, it made the case of my mother. I always hated that bastard. And when I saw his old bitchery, I was like, good, you're dead.

You ruined the rest of my eighth grade. You should have showed up at his funeral and roasted the fuck out of him. Oh, that would have been apropos. Hey, you fuck! How you doing down there? Well, that's not really roasting though, right? That's just kind of like a crazy. I would say ninth grader But you I told them I told them I went up to the school bus

That Friday after he kicked me off. He said hey, I've been good for a month I'm the one who figured this out on my own and it was just like Jason and For 30 years even though you still got kicked off the bus, you essentially threw away your comedy career and tell you met us. Until I was 42. And then I brought it back and now see where I am. A blessing for us though. A blessing for us.

Otherwise you may not be in our last. Are we done? You'd never residents in Vegas. We're just roast people. Yeah, yeah. It's true. You'd probably want to open up for Dane Cook or something. Yeah roast in like Bob say it or something before he died Yeah, we can fun the fact and and that it all ended you're continuing all that stuff ended with that throughout far

unbelievable So unfair to the audience what you just did. And please if you start those for the clips, say quick personal story. Alright, so everyone is having a really really good time. Too much fun actually. I never thought I'd say this, but they're kind of ruining guy for me. Like don't do the man like this. He's he's put down too many miles on Route 66 and he's eaten too many inedible chicken croquettes and trailers. And pretended they were good and pretended they were good to be commemorated like this.

I was just like, you stop it. Dylan, I'm shocked that you have a appreciation for this man. I have spoken. You don't listen. He loves to guy for years. Actually, it's not there unless I have no memory. I'm an alcoholic. We forget things I have lauded a guy theory many many times And we should do a segment on a ps great moments in triple D Okay, I'd love that but yeah, Dolly Parton's not just a big pair of tits and guy theories not just frosted tips Yeah, exactly you know what what I I wanna bring in the guy theory segment where he goes to that. What do you call those trailers

that are all metallic on the outside? Oh, I stream line. Stream line, stream line. And they're fucking cooking up hot dogs and shit in there. And they keep putting sauces on it. Oh, he doesn't turn into a soup on top of a hot dog. And the hot dog's super thick and boiled. And she's like, this is our tomato cheese.

He's like, oh, okay, I'll take this one with less of that. Yeah, yeah, and there's like a senator in there and he's eating a chili dog at 11 in the morning. You're like, what are you doing? If he could link me that, that would be. We'll watch it. All right, so bed for some. And nowhere near it for others. More shots are served. This time

It's cranberry pineapple vodka lime shots and Kyle's tune has changed quite a bit with these heterosexual women He's just not having as much fun. He's just not having as much fun We think in his life him and Frank are gonna start a new life with each other. His dreams with Frank are now interrupting, uh, or they're being interrupted by guess paying $60,000 a day. Kyle is in Monaco in his head. He's with Frank. They're very wealthy. How I don't know because he doesn't work.

But that's where he is right now. And he's thinking, I could be doing that. I'm better than these bitches. What a delusion, you know. But with them, the guests sitting there drinking all night, how can you say you don't like these people? This is how you enjoy this wrap. You make these sea rats serve you and tell the sun comes up.

I mean, Kyle easily probably could have brought out a bottle of tequila and went to bed. He didn't think of that, but I mean, I felt like they lived it up and they were just shooting a shit, reminiscing good times. Well, Kate Chastain has said, you know, when guests stay up this late,

the downside is you're up to 3.30 in the morning. The upside is they waking up for breakfast. Except on this charter. Yes. Because they have to. Right. Because they're getting the fuck off the boat. Yeah. Hey, I want to say we're going to mention where the guests at you touched out at Nikki, you know, live it up 3 30 in the morning, drink your face off and then walk up to, you know, one of the crew members to say, Hey, we need some

fucking drunk food. And then Natalia has to visit the culinary lost arc of sodium and diarrhea, which is frozen food. Frozen food. Oh, yes, we have to get to that. So the guests are wondering where the fuck the people they're paying to serve them are. And eventually they flag down Kyle who will take an hour and a half to pour a few shots of tequila. Now listen, Kyle and Natasha are punished for their sour pus attitudes to the tune of partying till 4 a.m. did not see this coming from these ladies. And I still, you know, it's cool that they're up, but, you know, still, they'll limp. They ask for pizza bites and white claw trash after your two swords. Kyle and Tosh unfortunately do not have pizza bites, but they do have bowls. And in those bowls, they can put what look to be some type of

or Mel product with cheese and pinos and chocolate couple fries on the side. She said drunk food. They need a Russian spy slash douchega character to cook the threat level hours. You know what I mean? I'd love to do Shka with that cap on. Right, right, right. I'm mopping one hand. Right.

I don't know. I skill it in the other somewhere between eating ash, making grilled cheeses with three inch blocks of cheddar and Dushka, like find that nice little nook. Somebody who can make bagel bites. So let's get to the next morning, but before we get there, let's take a quick break to talk about athletic greens. How unbelievable is athletic greens? It's amazing, Dylan. It's life changing to be honest. Grains. Health. Unbelievable as athletic grains.

It's amazing Dylan, it's life changing to be honest. Yeah. You know, you can, they got a couple different versions of how you can consume it, they got a shake you can make in the morning or they got those pre-packeted things that you can just mix with a little water, change your life.

It's all your like key vitamins that you need. Basically, I don't know if the company would allow me to say this, but you know, if you wanted to be healthy, maybe you just take these. It gives you superpowers, and also I started taking AG1 through. You did. Because it was something that we got sent to us.

I, to be honest, I started taking it because why not? You know, we got it for free. It's a sponsor. We're very fortunate. But once I started this it because why not? We got it for free. It's a sponsor. We're very fortunate. But once I started this small micro habit, I instantly flew through my mornings and my days. Nick, what do you have to say about athletic grants? One thing that I love about it,

it comes with your subscription. If you subscribe, it comes with a year supply of vitamin D, and I'm currently experiencing extreme hair annoyah. And one thing that can help prevent hair loss is vitamin D, and many, many, a large percentage of our population, is vitamin D deficient. I know, so your hair has been growing back.

Yeah, and that has to be athletic greens. I just haven't been cutting it because I'm afraid, but it's okay. Yeah. Right now, it's time. Nothing can hurt you with athletic greens. Yeah, and right now, it's time to reclaim your health and arm your immune system in here.

It doesn't say that, but. Yeah. With convenient daily nutrition, it's just one scoop in a cup of water every day. That's it, no need for a million different pills and supplements to look out for your health. Now, to make it easy, Athletic Greens is going to give you a free,

one year's supply of immune supporting vitamin D and five free travel packs with your first purchase. Whoa, all you have to do is visit athleticreams.com slash below deck. Again, that's athleticreams.com slash below deck. Again, that's Athleticreams.com slash below deck to take ownership over your health and pick up the ultimate daily nutritional insurance. And it helps you not be one of those weirdos.

You know, you walk into a stranger's house and they're kitchens there and they got 18 bottles of fucking vitamins there. You're like, look what this weirdo's on to. Yeah, it's totally, And this is post ad. So we can curse because the ads over. Yeah, I always do that. I judge you ever walking to Old Persons house

and they got a bunch of weird bottles and pills and you know, vitamins and whatnot. No, we don't because we do not rifle through them the way that you do. So let's get to the next one. That's because I'm going to. That big something to steal. I'm nosy. I like knowing what kind of addiction people are doing.

It's Z's birthday. He's accustomed to birthday weeks, actually. Not a fan of that. Pat and Z need to chill out on their birthdays. Z doesn't seem like the type of guy who demanded everybody, does it for him? No. No. So Pat proflames. He demanded everybody, does it for him? No. So it was a pap pro-blaves.

He has friends who did it for him. And honestly, from our chef Dave interview, I feel so bad the way I call them nerds. I don't hate nerds. I like nerds. I'm a nerd and man, I'm a nerds. And I like Z in Courtney, but they're nerds. And I just felt bad about that.

So, do you think I'm a nerd? I just, but they're nerds. And I just felt bad about that. So, um, do you think I'm a nerd? I just, to me, nerd. You can throw a football. To me, nerding out or being a nerd is like, extreme knowledge of specific things. Like, you, like, I don't know, you're enthusiasts as I'm from Magic the Gathering. That's, that's nerdy.

It's nerdy. So let's get to the major source of T. Bourd Home, Tosh and Kyle, leaving the pantry a mess. Now we never support a rat, but Natalia is extremely attractive. Um, I'm kidding. She's one of the goats of, of, of, of home. So she gets a little leeway. But like I said, this is a bad time to rat.

And she didn't know this, but given the state of the guest last night after their 5am fucking Guy Theory and Dolly Parton rager, you know, again, inopportune time to spill the beans, but there has a precedent that's been set with Natalia, with Tantasha and Kyle. Now, with Natalia being your TV girlfriend, I imagine you were absolutely fuming. Well, I was upset All right, hold on. There's two sides to every story So Natalia has definitely her little like passive aggressive arguments where she's gonna punch someone's dick And you know she's been letting Natasha and Kyle know hey, I'm getting to the point. I'm gonna lose my shit here I'm obviously pissed Natasha is kind of a failed leader

Although she does love her her job and I think does it well most of the time. She loves to party. Well, she loves to party, but she also loves being good to the guests and whatnot and they're happy. That's all the matter. She just loves to party. Okay, fair enough. But I was mad at my TV girl from For Being a Fuckin' Rat. but I was mad at my TV girl from For Being a Fucking Rat. I think she should have given Kyle and Natasha one last opportunity by telling them, hey, I am not happy with this and I might have to go to Sandy if you guys don't get your shit together. I think that, look, we don't always handle things the right way, but me as a just an outsider looking in a Monday quarterback and that's how I want to handle that.

I agree. She could have kept the high ground had she called an interior meeting and felt like she was being taken advantage of. But it was kind of sandy that like opened the door for and then just weren't hot. Come on in here. What do you have to say over there? You probably got some problems. And then the word vomit came out. I don't think Natalia at heart is a narc, but Natasha mentioned how much she hates narcs and someone who commits murder probably does hate narcs. Natasha and Kyle's had Zartan games.

All they do is chat, even Dave and Zee were mentioning it. They both have their loves lives ahead of taking care of businesses, what's happening here. And Natalia is obviously not into storm. So she's doing her job. Exactly. I think she likes storm. I think they're cute.

Yeah, listen to the Dave interview. You'll hear the four-one, what about that? What? He said what it was about. What did he say? Well, you have to listen to the interview. Okay. So the jazz cut.

That's for you, too. Oh, before we get to the, oh my gosh, bad hosting. So Sandy confronts Tosh in the AM and somehow these people, the charter guests wake up at eight o'clock in the morning. So there's not a lot of time to dwell on this. We get a TBC at the end of the episode. But Tosh and Natalia then get into a little bit of a squabble. And I will say that we're on Natalia's side,

but she is your boss. You're kind of coming at her a little bit intense here. There's really no hierarchy in this. That's the issue with this. It was very buddy-buddy for a while, but at the end of the day, push comes to work environment and work environments need hierarchical structures

if they are to succeed. You know, this got too muddied and then the stresses of work get injected into it and then it blows up like that one planet that Bruce Willis had to drive that oil rig into an Armageddon. Yeah. I mean, I think that's an amazing metaphor which's taken place here.

Yep. It was an asteroid. So let's get on onto the jet skis. They're put out and a mutiny against the third stew is hatched. Tosh tells Kyle about the betrayal and he wakes with a foggy venom to him. He, um, oh God, over breakfast. There are questions about whether or not pregnant women should take fullic acid pills. It's get these people off the fucking boat. And then they should try it. We get to more Jason and Z-futing and more Sandy giving Kyle and Tasha the business. Sandy tells Kyle to bucket the fuck up

and forgive me but what is the big fucking deal with Kyle and Natasha? Sandy reprimanded you. She didn't slit Frank's throat in front of, like, I don't understand why they're so upset and so defensive about the... Well, they feel betrayed. He says it's a fishy market up in here. It smells like fishy sticks. And it's got to smell like that. I mean, because's gay. I would eat no that smells all right so Kyle and Tosh have gone full nuclear and you know what? Thick oh, we're gonna stay in tonight You know how we'll get back at you. We're not going out to drink. Okay cool I'm gonna go out and drink you guys have fun cleaning. It's just like what what is that?

It's not good leverage. Well, enjoy yourself. We're gonna sit here on a boat. Well, you know what? I'm gonna journal about that horrible thing you said about my mother. All right. So the Trader guests talk about makeup tutorials. Again, get them off.

And then we get to some pretty thick tension and that was a pretty sick rip, huh? It's going on over here guy. You know how those things get clogged and then you just start to get. So I really fear for this happy family because there is thick tension and Tosh and Kyle are now speaking of their hatred of rats. Now we're not the biggest fans of Natasha, but she does have a pretty solid track record of not ratting. You know, she could have easily rat it.

You got to give Ursula and human form a little credit where credits do. Charter guest leave, and then we get to another test to see how strong Natasha is. I am strong. Yes, you all go. I am strong. We'll see you next week. Well, Sandy calls her up into the office there to discuss and she's definitely not going to get fired. So this is a stupid cliffhanger. That's it for us. iTunes, range of reviews. If it's Spotify, hit five stars. It's very, very easy. We would love for you guys to help us out there. Go to YouTube, subscribe, comment, like. Tell your friends, tell your family. Join us to Patreon. stay tuned for more C-Rat interviews and a brand new show. Coming down the pike. We love you very much. I'm Dylan saying goodbye. Nick say goodbye. Bon voyage. Pat say goodbye.

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