Another Below Deck Podcast - Gary King Is Crashing Into Rocks | Below Deck S5 E2
Episode Date: October 15, 2024Dylan and Pat are back to break down their war with Bravo, crashing into rocks, 10,000 people cheering for you, matcha lattes and more from Bravo's Below Deck Sailing Yacht. Ad Free and Uncensored at... Patreon.com/AnotherPodcastNetworkYoutube at https://www.youtube.com/@anotherbelowdeckpodcast_Instagram at https://www.instagram.com/badtvpodcast/Facebook Group at https://www.facebook.com/groups/anotherbelowdeckpodcastGo to MagicMind.com/BelowDeck and Use code BADTVGo to BodySmartFitness.com and mention the show in your application. Use code BADTV in the Tropical Smoothie AppGo to Ro.co/BELOWDECKÂ
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could you do like the flirting and stuff like would you why have to talk with my
wife and see how she's right but let say, let's say like you're completely napalming your life and you're
going to go be a C-Rat.
Right.
Would you like, it just seems so exhausting.
I could, well Dylan, you know, it's in your 20s.
I could have done this in my 20s.
Really?
Yes.
Because you seem to me like in your, you know, when you've regaled me with stories of your
past, it's, it's always been more efficient than this kind of quarter well Dylan I have I mean
it's a this is like literally like shooting fish in a barrel you're trapped
on a boat with a bunch of hotties come on now and again what is it lack of
options now there's a quote about it anyway I'm pretty sure I'd score quite a bit.
Welcome aboard. Another brand spanking new episode of another Beledec podcast. I got to tell you, listen.
Okay.
What are you going to say?
Dylan brought us in these green things.
What is this?
I have to tell you, I typically don't indulge in this type of
gluttony during the week. I save it for the weekends. You typically don't indulge
in a matcha latte. That's right. Even just the name of it is fancy.
Uh-huh. It's green. Do you know what gluttony means? Gluttony means I'm over
doing it on the food and enjoying myself like a pig. Okay, yeah. I typically don't
associate gluttony with yoga mom coffees,
but how are you liking it? I'm enjoying it. Yeah, do you like it? Yeah, tastes
pretty good. Okay, so listen, I'm Dylan, you're Pat. We're professionals. Welcome
aboard. We're professionals, right? Mm-hmm. We don't dime, we don't show up late. Most of the time we don't show up late.
But I don't know about you, I am running on absolute fumes right now.
Okay?
Everybody knows that we have waged a quiet war against Bravo.
It's no longer quiet, Dylan.
Can you update the fans?
Because the state that I'm in right now is only due to Bravo.
Sure.
Let me take the reins here, Dillon.
Let me put our fancy timer on first.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
We're at war with Bravo.
Bravo had been providing us screeners for a number of years.
So Dylan and I get to watch the show early, usually by Friday at one o'clock.
We've already recorded the episode that you watch on Monday nights.
It's not because we're better than you.
It's just, it's just that we deserve it.
And we're not better than you, but it makes us feel better.
That's right. Right.
Bravo has decided to rescind
that little perk that they bestowed on us a number of years ago for no reason at all.
The only real, the final remaining plank of wood keeping this whole thing afloat, this
entire relationship has now sunk.
That's right, Dylan.
So let me give an update.
And by the way, forgive us, but there's going to be a lot of housekeeping before we start
our recap of this episode.
Bravo.
The gloves are off. I want you to know this right now. Dylan and I are
gonna be doing a number of interviews over the next seven days with people
that you're gonna be very unhappy we're talking to. Well not seven days, right?
Well I know we're wrapping up Love is Blind but I'm scheduling them. Okay well
we're gonna be talking to people throughout the entire season. But I
really want this punch out of the gate because I want them to reconsider giving us
back those screener privileges.
Patrick, I don't know why you keep coming back to the double wide where you've had bottles
of whiskey thrown in your head, cigarettes put out on your forearms, undercooked food
served to you on purpose. We have been in a domestically abusive relationship with this
dastardly network for too long.
And while, while growth is sometimes difficult and painful, you have to embrace it.
I think that we are pirate radio moving forward.
I think not only will we be happier for it. I think that we are pirate radio moving forward. I think not only will we be happier
for it. I mean, I don't think we'll be happier for it. Those creators are pretty great, but I think
that the fans will like it a lot more. Maybe. Well, so I'm going to tease this. We have two
interviews set up already. One with a main cast member that Bravo does not want us to talk to. And then secondly, a guest or a particular, a couple of guests.
And you're not going to like the line of questioning because it's going to be all about production.
We're going to get all the behind the scenes dirt on you.
And I know how miserable that makes you.
So I will be specific about those questions to very, very drive the knife into your skin.
So F off Bravo, the gloves are off,
we are officially at war.
Guys, get ready for the interviews coming
in the next week or so.
If you don't wanna treat us like Mariah Carey,
we're not gonna treat you like Mariah Carey.
I am so tired and I, this is my morning, right?
I wake up in some kind of sleep that it was so tumultuous that
the pillow covers off the pillow. I don't even know that. I don't even know how
that happened. My head just beanbagged around the pillow so much the pillow
cover came off. Well maybe you were so upset about this whole screener business.
Probably, probably. I wake up, I drive to the coffee shop. Now I got us matcha
lattes, this gluttonous drink, because last week we fell into arrhythmia
because we drank four shot vanilla lattes.
You and I both agreed that that was just too much coffee.
It was too much for me.
I was wired all day long.
Right.
So I got the matchas today.
Now when you saw them and when you tasted it, you said, caffeine in this and then you said I'm gonna
go get some Splendas.
You dump the Splendas into the matcha latte and you gotta go to YouTube to watch this.
You are now drinking it out of a orange.
Kids love straws Dylan, we have lots of straws.
Do kids love straws?
They love straws.
I like a straw too.
So that's where we're at this morning. Well, I left my...
Does it have caffeine in it? A good amount. Yeah. Okay, good. If you drink that at three or four
o'clock, you will not go to bed until two or three. Oh, wow. Yeah. Okay. It's a Japanese
caffeine, you know, it's a quiet composed, it's a quiet composed caffeine. And before you know it, you're driving the the tip
of a katana into your fucking intestines. So anyways, I left
my phone at my apartment drove back was accosted by my
neighbor's evil Yorkshire Terrier. I almost kicked it. But
that would have made the day I can't start off I can't start
off by try abusing an animal. Well, standing my ground. But we don't
dime. We don't rat we perform. We're professionals. We have to
get into the show right now before we do. If you're
enjoying love is blind. Love is blind. We're just wrapping up an
amazing season. I the casting directors on that show should be
put in jail for putting the female cast members their lives at risk.
If they were doing this show in the 1930s, the Third Reich would have paid attention and said we need to get them on our team.
That's right.
They're diabolically evil people.
Well, we're just wrapping up. I think they got three more episodes left.
Just enough time for you guys to go sign up at patreon.com slash another podcast network and hear our coverage over there
We're also covering Real Housewives of Salt Lake City behind a paywall and then next week
We will start our another podcast show and PMC launches again
Forgive us for having to sideline those for a minute. We're just doing 14 podcasts a week at this point
I can't even talk you can see what it's doing.
Yeah, yeah, I can't talk.
All right, so episode two.
Episode two, some more housekeeping, Dylan.
As you know, the listeners,
they provide us with lots of like inside Bravo stuff.
They're out scouring the internet
to see what these Sea Rats are up to.
Gary King in particular is very upset with this season.
Can you believe it?
He is posting on his Instagram,
which is typically a big no-no of talking about production.
I'm just happy he's watching it.
I am too.
I almost slid into the comments and said,
glad to see you're watching this season, Gary King.
But I didn't because I thought it was petty.
Anyway, he posted last night.
I am dead this morning.
You are a live wire.
Well, you got me on this matcha.
Gary King posted to his Instagram,
Sad to see this is all been edited out of tonight's episode.
Scary how one's
person's lies
can ruin someone's career in
livelihood. And what Gary posted a picture
of is him dressed up in that,
what was it, the
I don't know know the sexy lingerie
party wing thing whatever he says oh well my hell head is held high as I know
excuse me I'm moving the picture here as I know the truth karma will get you
anyways seeing as most of me will probably be edited out this season I
will try post I'm just reading as he wrote it,
as much as possible to show you all
what you're missing out on.
Oh wow, yeah, I really needed some more B-roll
of you dancing around in that ridiculous shirt of yours.
I wonder what he's talking about.
I'll show you, it's that,
when they all dressed up like that.
He thought that there should have been more B-roll
because he's so hilarious.
Gary, I know there's sexual allegations against you,
and forgive me as audience members, let's say he wasn't accused of that.
Sure. The audience is still sick of you. It's not
just that. We're tired of you on our television screens. We want you off this show. Casting
made a horrible mistake. And Dylan, I've done a little research myself. The below deck world,
the barnacles are really unhappy that Daisy and Gary are here. I'm sorry Daisy I'm lumping you
in there too. And all this, all these scenes. Daisy's not Gary but Daisy is Daisy and we don't
want her. I'm sorry I'm sure you're a nice person but I don't care about you and Gary's relationship.
This is the second episode where we have multiple scenes of you guys trying to
work through your differences. No one gives a fuck. Hey, Bravo.
I know you production people. A couple of you have reached out.
Listen to old Patty save the show, edit Gary out as much as possible.
And any scenes with him and Daisy talking to each other, just edit it out.
We don't care. This is why we're here. Yeah. Captain Glenn, you're amazing.
All the captains can stay.
You got to interchange these people. No one is too big for the show.
We want to see, as Dylan coined this phrase a number of years ago, and it's brilliant. We want to see
incompetence thrust upon the wealthy. That's the best part of the show. All the Sea Rats hooking up. I always like the new stories coming out. Gary and Daisy, your storylines are tired and old
and they should be retired.
Yeah, it's like...
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It's watching Daisy and Gary is a little bit like you know that show how to how
does this get made on like whatever.
It's like if they did that for like the score bar,
you know, and it's like, nobody eats that.
Nobody wants to know how did that happen?
Yeah, it's like, I don't have score bars.
Why is it spelled S-K-O-R, you know?
Great example.
What's that?
Yeah, sometimes they're like, hey, watch us make a hammer.
Well, I think I know how they put a hammer together.
But anyway, yeah.
Oh, can I spill some?
We'll get into the episode.
I need to suck down some of this matcha,
and get some nicotine in me, and then I'll be alert and alive.
OK, last couple.
But can I say really quickly? Can I please two things of dirt that
the fans have given us? Um, one of them being my wife, she's a fan. No, not of the show, just of
us. She doesn't listen to a second of it. It's nice to have your wife be a fan of something you do.
Yeah, she's a fan. She said that Lee was asked.
Oh yes.
Lee getting in the mud.
Go ahead, take it away.
And Queen in the Sea, Kate getting in the mud too.
Oh really?
Yeah, she's taking Captain Sandyside.
So Captain Lee, because he's irrelevant
and an old fucking fuddy duddy with nothing to do
but stare at a fucking wall all day,
he was asked at one of those ridiculous hang out with Captain Lee and smoke a
cigar nights.
The same people that are paying for those are score bar eaters. That's right.
You know, it's like, what are you doing?
Well, some people showed up to this and one of the questions was, uh,
who's your least favorite, uh, below deck cast person. Yeah.
And he said Captain Sandy. Yep. Okay, she's way better than you.
You one dimensional old fuck.
At least she's growing as a person.
You are who you are and no one likes you.
Anyway, Kate thought that was pretty petty of him
to do that and she posted accordingly on her Instagram.
I don't have the direct quote.
Other piece of business.
Yeah, the other piece of business is listen,
I can't stand Daisy, okay okay I think that the audience gets
gaslit by the show a little bit and did not recognizing that she's like kind of
shitty but Daisy evidently had to they filmed this show a couple of days after
the reunion the reunion wherein Gary took no accountability,
said he didn't watch the show even though he did,
gas lit a little himself.
So within that context, I understand
why Daisy is a Roman candle right out of the gate, right?
Bravo.
Help your cast out a little bit can you
let us know that this was a couple days after the reunion or do you want us to
just think that she's pissed for no fucking reason so there are some
theories out there and we will get to the recap there's a theory out there
that they were already invested in this and they had to film it anyway and what
they've done over the last year was hide the show from us to make us think that
Gary had been in fact edit out or he'll be fired in the next episode but he's here to stay at least for this season he got fired
after the filming of this season Gary posted about it by the way it was him playing in a
patch of daisies saying that uh he'd finally fallen out of the sky and he was okay with it
whatever the fuck it's so sad to self-importance is such a gross
You know we fall into it too, but you can't post that picture
You can't see a field of daisies and know oh this would be a perfect metaphor for my announcement of why I was terminated
Below deck sailing yeah, yeah
One soap if you don't mind one more swing at Daisy before we move into and we love everybody
Yeah If you don't mind one more swing at Daisy before we move into. And we love everybody. Yeah. Yeah.
Although I will say a little again,
Bravo doesn't want us talking about this.
We've talked to multiple Sea Rats that have worked with Gary and Daisy.
They're a little too big for their britches and I get it.
Their names come up first when the show starts.
This is their third or fourth season. You start to get this feeling,
especially as you get all these like Instagram deals and all this stuff outside
of this, then you're like, Oh, I got to go on that
boat and pretend like I'm a Sea Rat again.
You are a Sea Rat.
You are a Sea Rat.
You always will be a Sea Rat.
But you can see it with Gary.
I mean, just this episode crashing that boat with the hot girl on there.
Sure.
He's more worried about being filmed than he was navigating through rocks.
Daisy.
Yeah, you know, I've always been a very confident person. Yeah, right. filmed that he was navigating through rocks. Daisy.
I've always been a very confident person.
Yeah, right. And Daisy's busy looking at her Instagram rather than serving people, paying customers on this show.
Clearly, they're out of it.
Sorry, I'm a broken record.
Time to go.
OK, all right. Last piece of business.
There's some name issues here for old Patty.
Definitely. So I workshopped a couple. I'm gonna call Emma, who is kind of, doesn't like to really
interact with people. She's kind of a loner. Don't call her Big Ben. No, I'm gonna call her
Emma Lone. You know, like Emma Stone. Emma Lone. That's horrible. All right. All right. All right.
How about this one? The David D or whatever. I can't figure his name out. I'm just going to call him divide.
No, that's horrible. All right. I did workshop. I'm workshopping these. I got to make them so
I can remember the people's names. It's Daffodil is fine. Davidel.
Daffodil is fine. All right. That's a keeper.. That's a keeper. All right. Then that weirdo.
Weirdo.
Yeah.
I mean, and weirdo is not bad.
I'm weird.
That's right.
People think I have autism when they meet me at first.
You know?
So there's nothing wrong with weird.
But let's get it straight.
Davidil is weird.
That's right.
We'll get to his C-Rat history a little bit.
What did he say?
I love ecstasy.
Me too.
Hey, what'd you do this weekend?
Ah, met a guy, married him.
Oh, I didn't know you went that way.
Oh, it was all the ecstasy.
Drugs make you do things.
I mean, when I was on Quad Stacks of Ecstasy,
I was on people's shoulders in front of David Guetta.
That's right.
I would never get on somebody's shoulders at a concert.
It's ridiculous.
Well, do you marry him?
In a sense, yeah.
OK, I'm ready to get started. All right.
Let's get into our pots.
Do we want to apologize for taking so long to get in the episode?
I don't think we need to.
We had so much housekeeping.
We had to clean up there.
And I think the audience enjoys it.
Love is blind. Patreon.com. Salt Lake so much housekeeping. We had to clean up there. And I think the audience enjoys it.
Love is Blind, patreon.com, Salt Lake City, patreon.com.
OK, so pots for this episode.
I will give this episode 90 pots.
I thought it was a really fun episode.
I think that Dr. Contessa and the married demand.
I'm sorry.
I don't watch that television.
Her husband's Dr. Scott.
OK. They were so fun, so lovely. I don't watch her husband's doctor Scott. Okay.
They were so fun, so lovely.
They could have been meaner. They were not mean.
And that's usually not a recipe for a good group of guests.
But usually you have like chuggy old Floridian whites
who are doing that.
And these people are actually living it up they're staying at the you know, the
The Ibiza and they're having a lot of fun. I can't believe what they did to these people. What do you mean?
Dinner sir. Well, we'll get to it dinner service like that
What do you mean the proteins? Uh, the first dinner service? Okay
Why don't we just get started? Yeah, I'm sorry. I love you. I'm gonna give it a 90 service. Okay. Why don't we just get started? I'm sorry. I'm going to give it 90 pots. Okay. I'm going to give it a hundred pots. Okay. So
Dylan, what I'm referring to is we begin the episode with half the charter guests
wrapping up their meal as Dr. Scott awaits his steak that was overcooked and
Daisy proudly walks into the dining area and announces to Dr. Scott, he cooked a new one.
Well, Daisy,
he either cooked a new one or Chef Cloyce owns
a time machine and went back in time and didn't
overcook the first one.
What a stupid fucking pronouncement to me.
We had some fans that
were like this is on Cloyes how do you not cook like do you have any idea how
difficult it is to cook four different proteins at three or four different
temperatures and have them all land at the same time one person doing that it
is impossible to do that Daisy is the one that put him in that position.
And Cloyce makes it even worse.
Yeah, I gotta say, just in pots, this kid is,
he's 22, right?
So he's a young man.
He's an absolute dork.
He's absolutely cringe-worthy.
But he's providing a lot of entertainment this season.
I like Cloyce.
If he doesn't get fired, I see big things for him in this franchise.
Oh, he'll get fired.
Yeah, he'll get fired.
Can I tell you one misstep that he made?
Going up and announcing what dinner was?
We know what dinner is.
Well, he announces what it is.
He's like, oh, well, you ate all yours already, I guess.
Okay, here we go.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
The dinner that six of you and not eight of you
have consumed this evening was steak and lobster.
So have a nice meal.
So yeah, the first dinner was an absolute train wreck.
And Cloyce, don't do that.
You have to hide.
After that happens, just hide.
That's right.
So Gary goes to pick up the dancer, and there are rocks more after that happens. Just hide. That's right. So Gary goes to pick up the dancer and there are rocks more on that.
Later. She's very hot and Gary is very Gary.
So he's going to crash the boat.
Oh yeah. They cut to him at it. Thank you production.
When he was up in the galley, when they, when she arrives, he,
they got a close up of him checking her ass out. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
He's a pig.
He's a pig.
OK, can I do it meanwhile?
Yes, of course.
Meanwhile, we get us a little Sea Rat history
on Captain Glenn.
And what I didn't know was he was Mr. Carter
from Welcome Back Carter.
Probably your little.
It's Cotter.
Cotter, with a K. K-O-T-T-E-R. Cotter.
Did you know everyone on that cast is dead
except for John Travolta?
Well, I could assume.
And John Travolta's dead too.
Well, yeah.
When you get that embedded into the Church of Scientology,
I think Miscavige rips your soul out
and keeps it in his balls or something.
And then that's why Travolta's so weird now.
Yeah. We get weird as you get old too, Dill. And then that's why Travolta's so weird now. Yeah.
We get weird as you get old too, Dill.
Not like that.
Did you have more Mean Wiles?
Oh, you know, I misspoke.
Gabe Kaplan, who played Mr. Kata, he's still alive too.
He hosts poker on the Game Show Network.
How do you know that?
I've seen him on it.
You watch the Game Show Network?
Occasionally. Helps me go to sleep at night. See you at the Food Network. What do you
watch on the Game Show Network? I watch poker. Is this celebrity poker? No, just
random people. Okay. So yeah, Captain Glenn culturally appropriated in the 1960s and 70s as most white Americans
did.
My dad did.
Really?
Yeah, there's pictures of him with the same hair as Captain Glenn.
Wow.
They call them perms.
Yeah.
It's crazy to do that.
Like, I'm not trying to get all political, but like, to do that so close to the wake of the
Civil Rights Movement, that's pretty crazy.
The 70s were a wild time.
Wild time.
And the thing about that perm or that afro is Glenn could easily conceal his blades in
it.
That's when he began to bloodlet hoarse.
That's right. Yeah, so We get to Danny who loves male attention
And we get some seerat history with her I can cover this yeah, of course, okay
She was a chubba wubba and then she got a Planet Fitness membership
And now she's an attention star of seerat to be continued to be see
She said that she was a cheerleader and that she went from,
did you say chubba wubba? Yeah. Okay. Yeah. Fatty boom body. She went from being not happy
with her, her body image to being a cheerleader. I cannot, I can't get over you drinking out of an
orange straw yeah by the way this makes me remember when I was used to be on
drugs pretty high right now what do they put in this thing it's
kratom nice do you remember when you were doing kratom for a while yeah they
call it what is it gas station oxy, it's just a, it's a
watered down version of heroin. Hey, if they sell it at a hookah store, how bad could it
be? Really bad. They sell galaxy gas at hookah stores. You know what galaxy gas is? No, it's
nitrous oxide. Wow. I walked
into a head shop. I was like, do you guys have zins? He's like, no, they're banned.
I was like, you have $10,000 worth of nitrous oxide. He's like, well, it's not banned.
Yeah. Rules and regulations are so funny. Oh, yeah. But anyways, getting back to male lover, Danny, the male lover.
She said that she became a cheerleader and that she went from not loving herself to having tens of thousands of adoring fans screaming for her.
They weren't screaming for you.
There was a team behind.
There was a sport being played. So it had nothing to do with you
I mean, I don't even think I think the Dallas cheerleaders and the Laker girls are really the only cheerleading
Squads that get cheered for I think pretty much right now. I mean, I don't know maybe places in
Texas A&M games or something. I don't know. Yeah, let me cast a line here
Danny if you're listening Dylan, I would love to have you on you
Do not need to go through Bravo pre up PR just hit me up in the DMS. We'll have you on yeah
I mean you might get fired but they already filmed the season last year. How could you possibly get fired now? Good point
So the dancer arrives the guys get into some women's clothing Gary has some serious trouble getting this on he is
get into some women's clothing. Gary has some serious trouble getting this on. He is mentally handicapped? No, he loves attention. That's you see kids. How do you not get this shirt on? It's
not that. It's when you have children, you understand when they want attention, they act out
things like that. That's Gary because his brain, he's arrested development. We're dealing with a
14 year old here.
Yeah, he wants attention of the cameras
and people around him.
Yeah, that's why he needs to be off my television.
Okay, so we do some, this dancer was, forgive me,
but I don't want to do a class on vacation.
Especially when I'm drunk after a poorly timed, you know,
sequence of dinner.
Yeah.
We get to everybody gather around, I'm going to show you how to sexy walk.
It's like, this isn't the kind of dancing that, you know, is what I was meaning. but the best part of this entire evening is Daffodil who really works his way into
the personal space of the dance instructor on the teak and we get a
little Sea Rat history with Daffodil. Yeah he's quite the free spirit
self-proclaimed free spirit went to a music festival or so one of those things anyway ended up marrying a guy
And now they're Facebook friends, right?
What is his accent no clue it's like he's a child of the cosmos
He has every single accident in accent in the world in one man with massive forearms and
Or care.
I'm telling you, I mentioned this in the first podcast.
They must've been really hard up
for casting people this season
because typically someone like Davideel,
again, they'd be below the boat.
You just throw them scraps of meat at the end of the day
to keep them, sustain them, you know what I mean?
Well, he is being thrown scraps of meat
and cold potatoes down there,
but when he does get any kind of vitamin D, I think that he shines.
Oh, yes.
It's a free spirit.
It's like that guy that did the pommel horse at the Olympics that couldn't see.
He was only good at one thing, right?
Keep him in the dungeon.
When we need him to do the pommel horse, we'll bring him up for air.
So Gary has to take the pretty dancer girl home and while talking about his confidence
There was this rock that just jutted out of the water and jumped at the boat. He didn't see it
and
Listen, she is beautiful. Oh, yes, but I
Don't know well
He's going so fast, and it's so dark out okay So I want to, I don't want to sound like a alarmist is the wrong word, but okay.
Wait a minute. I'll get to that point. What he does to that boat and how that's dealt with
in the next couple of minutes of the show just blows my mind.
They forget about the safety once they're on this show.
And I've seen this play out with Captain Lee,
where he almost got a cast member's leg ripped off.
He's like too busy on it playing Candy Crush or whatever
the hell Captain Lee was doing.
Captain Lee, the first season we ever had with Captain Lee,
he did fire drills every day.
Every episode, there was a fire drill. Like the behavior of a genuine psychopath making these people do that.
And then fast forward,
he's just taking dumps and milking himself on the toilet playing candy crush and
people's legs are getting ripped.
And don't forget he's a drunk, uh, multiple CRS reported to us.
They'd always find empty bottles of booze.
Allegedly a lot.
I can say anything I want about him. No you can't you can't defame people especially
people who were you know pretty desperate. It's true. If you're gonna sue anybody just sue Pat.
I mean it's we all we always say it but if you're gonna sue just sue Pat he has hard assets that you can get that's true
You know
Anyway, so the safety's gone out the window you are really carrying us right now. I gotta apologize
I'm dead on my now. I feel like I'm a little too amped up with this drink that you gave me
Do you like it now? Yeah, I really like it. I'd like to have one delivered every Tuesday
I don't expect that but if you did I feel pretty good about it. My best life right
now. You want a match every Tuesday? Well no maybe switch it up. Maybe whatever
you brought last week just cut it in half as far as the... You want me to cut
it in half? Okay. Now do you want the same size? Yeah. So you just want a lot of milk?
No it's caffeine too. Okay, so I love that
It's it's just on it's just on Emma now once he gets back to the boat and he tells Glenn it's on Emma
He's like keep an eye out for what?
How am I supposed to know how the fuck is she supposed to know if it gets an inch lower?
Two inches lower in the dead of night in the middle of the fucking ocean. Okay.
I wanna point this out,
cause Gary reports this to Captain Glenn,
I assume that this is the procedure
that you have to go through.
Right.
And you know I really like Captain Glenn a lot.
He's probably one of my favorite captains
aside from Captain Carrie.
How can you have your-
Where does Captain Jason land on that list?
He's right at the middle mark.
Is Sandy above Jason?
They're fighting for fourth, I think.
I think Sandy wins.
Yeah.
Yeah.
She's really, I'm really enjoying her because you see her growing as a manager and I think
she's finding a nice balance between thinking she's hot shit and then also having to pretend
that she talks about her.
Yeah, now that Lee hates her, we love her.
Yeah, that you know, sometimes if we both have the same enemy, we might just be friends.
Right.
Alright, so Gary reports this to Glenn and Glenn, you know, I get it, he's tired, long day.
The procedure in my mind should have been, if that tender could sink and they're out in the middle of the ocean
at night. Let's say it's a confluence of bad events. The actual boat catches fire.
What is your way out of there? I know you do have to think down the line with these maritime
concerns. So you have a sinking Tinder. So there's no way how it's like not having enough light bolts on the Titanic
Titanic goes down. Yeah, everyone fucking dies
Procedure should have been Glenn get your ass out of bed and take that boat back to dock because you don't know if you have a
Plan B sure am I over the top here? I think you're a little over the top. Okay, so hit me up
Let me know if I'm right. We last left off with
Oh, that was the top of my notes section.
So let's get to the next day.
Gary's got to get video of the damage.
And the damage is
only cosmetic, thankfully.
How is that
only cosmetic? It looks horrible.
Well, I learned a little bit.
I guess they have
inner tubes that are built inside
the framing of the boat
So even when there's structural damage on the outside, it will still float. Okay. Hmm
It feels like it's seep into the gut. It's like foam core in there
It's like a seeped into the guts of the whole thing. We'll make it all wet and stink
Well at this point if the inner tube thing for lack of a better term gets punctured now, you're fucked, right?
so
We got we have Oh Beach to get to okay for lack of a better term gets punctured. Now you're fucked. Right. So we got
we have O Beach to get to.
OK, I love to this part of the show.
Yeah, it was an amazing part of the
show. Daisy says that day drinking is
better than night date than night
drinking. Get me in bed by nine
o'clock.
I've always hated day drinking because
day drinking comes with an expectation.
That you're not going to bed at nine for me, every day drinking because day drinking comes with an expectation that you're not going to bed at 9. For me, every day drinking situation I've been in is we're
starting at 3 and we're going all night and I hate that. I'm not capable of
doing that. So I've always hated day drinking but if you know that you're
getting into bed at 7 and you're asleep by nine, get in
the comments, let us know.
Do you like that?
That's, I think that's my preferred way to do it.
I have thoughts.
Even as a young person, Dylan, remember when you're 22, 23, you're supposed to be, you
can go 24, seven, right?
Supposedly.
You need cocaine.
Exactly.
So many trips to Vegas where we go, the group of guys or whatever say, we're going to party
by the pool all day.
And then tonight we're going out to this stupid club or whatever.
Yeah.
And I've done that and it's hard, but you have cocaine, so it's fine.
Okay.
But if you don't, you have to pick.
You're either going to party during the day or party during night.
You cannot do both because I've seen people struggle for everyone to start hopping in
the showers at 8.30
after they've been drinking since one.
Yeah, absolutely.
And then everyone's miserable.
Then when you go out to have this party mode thing
at a clobber or a dinner.
Dinner's quiet.
It's not fun.
Everybody's just fatigued.
They would rather have their head on a pillow
at that given time.
You gotta pick.
And me, my preference still, because I'm old now,
there's nothing better than some mimosas during the day, knowing, in our case if we have Lupita around you're gonna get some nachos
You get some nachos, and I my head will put the hit the pillow at eight o'clock
I'll start fresh the next day all over again mm-hmm anyway, but when you're in Las Vegas
Give me night every time over day mmm
Ever what are you gonna gonna go to a beach club
in the middle of the day and fucking hang out?
It's hotter because all the girls are in the bikinis,
you're still partying.
Yeah, but how are you gonna have sex?
You have to get into the night to sex.
You're not gonna sex in the day.
You never had sex during the day?
Well, I've had sex during the day
with monogamous partners.
I guarantee at this Ibiza club,
there are more people sneaking out
to go find some bushes or something to have at it with one another. It's too carnal.
It's too carnal for me. I love a Vegas Beach Club party. Oh god, it's just piss
soaked pools. There's piss everywhere. So, um, Harry Boy and Danny, he's a
relationship guy, this guy Keith, and he's ready to
roll. He's not the right person to be hitting on. I think that he's a
little bit turned off by Danny, but she will wear him down eventually. Yeah and
you wouldn't think that she'd be attracted to him. I'm not saying he's not
a gilded guy, but this is one of those situations where there just the lack of options on an enclosed area of where
there are young people that would like to have sex. He is a benefactor of that.
Well and it's the same the same goes with her. I mean he's he's slipping into
the Stockholm syndrome of Sea Rats. Now I'm not saying that he's turned off by
her, but he's just not that kind of guy. He's a little bit of a prude and when
you say that it's a Stockholm syndrome thing,
it is, but remember the cheese into all men
above six out of 10.
That's right.
All men.
So.
Let me tell you something.
When you have no standards, the field is open.
And you've been in bouts like that before in your life.
Of course.
And everybody deserves love.
So that's the right place to be. You don't want to be too persnickety about who you're fucking
you know what I mean so the guests wake up they're really nice they invite the
sea rats to the beach and Danny and Diana or Deanna began to do some
cleaning and Danny says she wants to I just want to fuck and Danny goes why are you like
this?
Are we gonna call her Diana or Deanna?
I feel like we should be consistent.
Oh you think we should be consistent?
Yeah.
Okay.
Look at me.
Deanna we get to O Beach and the South African guy is immediately accosted.
Oh sorry sorry.
Oh did I skip over something? Well, no, I just want to
make sure because was this where is it Danny? Oh, no, it was Diana, where she talks about Diana.
Diana, we're gonna call her that. We call the spy too. We call her the spy. Well, no, no, no, I was gonna say, are you okay? Sorry, no, I'm looking through my notes because at some point she kind of, she shares with us that she has her sights on bigger, bigger things in her life. I guess we'll cover that in a minute. Captain Glenn. Maybe. So Cloyce comes from England.
The name comes from England.
And Daisy says that he's overconfident and not her type, which means that they'll probably
hook up in six episodes.
That's right.
Yeah.
Yeah.
He may be too young though.
Women that are in their mid-20s, they're very turned off by guys that are even three or
four.
Mid-30s? Mid-20s they're very turned off by guys that are even thread 30s I am mid-20s forgive me I'm just saying when I was 22 I was s out of luck with girls
in their mid-20s they wanted guys in their early 30s he is not in her mid-20
oh I wasn't talking about I would say I was talking that potentially he may have
a shot with Deanna or Danny as well but he doesn't have a shot with them okay
but I know you're talking I know you're talking about Daisy. Right. But but does he have a shot with Daisy?
Yeah. Yeah. OK.
So, dude, these nine o'clock recordings are tough.
I'm loopy, man. I mean, all right.
So swimsuits need to get to the beach.
We get to the beach. We're partying.
I have thoughts on this.
I don't know what the hell these guys were thinking.
First off, their beautiful wives looked killer in their little
Scantily clad bikinis very hot whoo. Yeah, you're very into dr. Condessa and Darpan. I love dr. Condessa
Well, anyway, I was thinking who the fuck shows up to a beach club with a pool without your trunks
It's like showing up to a goddamn orgy without a lube or something. Yeah, my asshole hurts. Yeah, if you're gonna
show and I forgot the lube. Yeah, anybody got some lube I
can borrow. If you're gonna grab some off your asshole if you
don't mind. And thank you. I tried to interrupt so many
times because I knew where that was going. Right. We were in a
warehouse in Sun Valley with stained mattresses everywhere.
So I knew that it couldn't be good but you plowed forward and then you
ran over Jeremy Renner's leg so Gary is woken up and he says that all that
happens on this boat is that he gets woken up and he's bossed around by Daisy
oh yes Gary this has nothing to do with Daisy this is not Daisy's fault Is that he gets woken up? Uh-huh, and he's bossed around by Daisy. Oh, yes, Gary
This has nothing to do with Daisy. This is not Daisy's fault
Okay, this is a shitty situation. It's part of see red life. Okay, you are at the back and call of the wealthy
Okay, that's right. Get up go drive to o town and give them their swimsuits instead. He has a
Sig with Emma alone.
Sure.
Well, he drops the swimsuits off.
Then we get to this swap out thing.
Excuse me.
And the guests want to party at the beach club, right?
Love it.
I would too.
And I have to give many props to their stamina.
Me too.
They've been drinking since one, and they still have their shit together, not to get ahead of myself, at dinner. Yeah. Way
to go. That is responsible alcoholism. Absolutely, absolutely. But because they
want to stay at the... You know I'm always amazed at the lack of patience that these
Sea Rats have. Which it just goes to show you that this is not the cream of the
crop, right? So if you're on super yachts and there's a Russian oil baron
and his children, you know, Gregoria, Nikolai and Alexei, they've killed people before, right?
And it's been swept under the rug, right? They're at O-Town and they want to party.
The cream of the crop in service know that these three little murderers are going to
want to stay there all day, all night, right?
And there's no complaining about it.
It's part of the job.
For Daisy, Gary, and Co. to be like exhausted that these people want to stay at this club
for more than four hours is like, it's just so below deck.
Kate, Chastain, Queen of the Sea,
she knew how to play this game well.
She'd want them to stay there until it gets pitch dark out,
knowing they're going to come back to the boat
and pass the fuck out.
Kate Chastain said one of the little tricks too
is you sneak in their cabins
while they were getting ready for bed
and close all the curtains
so there was no light to awaken them.
Now, there is a downside to drunk day drinking Dylan
Which is the waking up like a bear out of hibernation at midnight and demanding food. That's true. That's true
Mm-hmm, and you've seen these bears coming out of the dens once spring hits
That's right. They're very dangerous and they're very tired. They're very hungry now
Yeah, get in the comments. Let us know. I mean, I
Was confused about how out of line or in line Daisy was here because to me Daisy should know that this
Could possibly take a while
I don't know if this is an interior thing or an exterior thing
I land on the side of Daisy because as is evidenced by
Gary and Emma alone.
Emma alone.
Emma alone. Yeah.
Emma alone.
Maybe we'll shorten Emma alone.
It's the worst nickname you've ever come up. Okay. And you've come up with some brilliant ones and some stinkers. This is the
stinkiest.
I'm gonna I'm gonna put it on the shelf for now. We're just gonna call her Emma, okay? Emma, let us know what nickname
you would like to call us, okay? It can't just be Emma, okay? So it's evidenced by him
just sitting around smoking cigs and being told that he can't behave like a child by
the person with the lowest amount of experience on the boat, that he has plenty of time on
his hands.
And so does the deck crew.
So I think this is one of those situations
where they can lend a helping hand.
But tonight is 90s theme.
Everybody gets back to the boat immediately face plant.
Immediately face plant.
But Cloyce has to prep for a 90s themed dinner,
which evidently means we're doing Thai. Yeah. Okay. Okay. 90s cuisine is for me personally,
you can go one of two ways, right? Lunchables, right?
Pizza from Chuck E. Cheese. Pizza from Chuck E. Cheese.
Sizzler had, was that their Zenith in the 90s?
Oh yes.
Okay.
Dorsey Affair, right?
You know what I mean?
Lot of shit with mandarin oranges in it.
Yeah.
But Thai makes no sense
No time makes not a single lick of sense. No, it doesn't and you know what else doesn't make sense still
Deanna shares with us kind of her history. I'm not gonna call it C rat history
But she does share with us that she's been cleaning piss off toilets for five years
And at this point in her life, she's ready to set the world on fire.
And her goal is to launch upward in the stratosphere. Her intention to eventually make
lemon drop shots and try and remove napkins that are stuck to dry surfaces. Now listen,
I thought she was going to say she wanted to be a senator. Now, only bloodthirsty,
Only bloodthirsty lizard people want to be senators, right? But I like Deanna. Now we've mocked people in the past. I can't remember her name. We had her on the show.
She was hilarious. I think Lara. Oh Lara. Lara. Oh she's great. Who was so great, so
fun, and she had, she was overwhelmed when she got the lead decan position.
Now we mocked her for having a dream
so close to floor level.
And the sea rats often do, because the ceiling is literally,
I mean, you can touch it with your hair.
You can touch it with your hair.
So I want Deena, Deanna, we should just call her Dina.
I want Dina to explode through the glass ceiling,
like the Willy Wonka glass ceiling,
but for right now, she would like to make a jump
from cleaning shit streaks off of the toilet bowl
and you know, onto serving lemon drop shots.
And we want that for her.
So.
Sky's the limit.
Not really.
So, sky's the limit. Not really.
Cloyce says that he is not going to be the first person to get fired and the camera zooms
in on him, which I don't know if that's something to throw us off the scent.
It's a lofty goal, but I think that Cloyce is going to get fired.
So the guests get ready for dinner.
But first, Keith and Danny have a bit of bands.
And Keith says, jokingly, that she was punching.
OK.
A punchy or punching?
Punching.
OK.
Now, this means she was punching above her weight class.
This is a South African way of talking.
It's an insult, though.
It's an insult.
Also a little jealousy there clearly clearly but
Is my hand supposed to start shaking yeah pretty right about now, I think that's the Splenda though
So here's the thing with Danny
You can't be a bro and also be a
deeply insecure former boom baddie who is deeply insecure and can fly off the handle of really anything that strikes too close to home without you
having any awareness that it's striking too close to home and then spiraling off into
a psychic panic, right? But on Keith, he should know that this is not okay to say
to somebody who is very clearly.
His only option?
No, the thing that I just laid out.
Oh, right, right.
So you know that if somebody is this voraciously obsessed
with male attention, there's gonna be some landmines
and don't step on them.
Yeah.
And that's exactly what he does.
His calf is back at O-Town.
Yeah, it's been blown off.
Blown off.
Yeah, and the audience doesn't care
that we skipped over her flirting
with that service director the entire day.
Yeah, I said he was accosted, yeah.
But meanwhile.
Meanwhile.
Well no, let's get to dinner.
Thai curry with sweet potato.
Cloyce goes up there and really whites the place up.
With this wrapping with the wrap.
He heads up there, has a shot with them and says, can I wrap for you guys?
No, I think that we have probably waded into progressive waters that make everybody uncomfortable
Right, and it's very clear that I don't maybe you know
People of color aren't as sensitive as everybody they were they were insulted with Eminem
You think they were and the Beastie Boys
But they they broke through and it's it's it's open for Cloyce to make a fool out of himself.
But is it okay for a little white child to come up and go,
hey, group of very successful black people,
can I rap for you?
I think it's a little weird, but they loved it.
They had a great time with it.
And Cloyce is unbelievably embarrassing.
But he secured the $15,000 tip, we'll get to it.
Now, we get to him meanwhile.
Meanwhile.
Danny is grossed out by cleaning showers.
What about the shit?
It's a great point.
It's a great point.
What about the piss and shit?
I know that hair is gross, but feces, way gross hair. That's a great point. What about the piss and shit? I know that hair is gross, but feces is way grosser.
That's right.
Cloyce is good at magic, obviously, and Daisy is pissed for some reason.
I can't even remember.
But we get to the final day.
You know how you always talk about abandoning your life and children to go on this show
and becoming a C-Rap?
Could you do the flirting and stuff?
Like would you?
Well I'd have to talk with my wife and see how she feels.
Right, but let's say,
let's say like you're completely napalming your life
and you're gonna go be a C-Rap, right?
Would you like, it just seems so exhausting.
I could, well Dylan, you know, in your 20s,
I could have done this in my 20s. Really? Yes. Because you
seem to me like in your you know, when you've regaled me
with stories of your past, it's it's always been more efficient
than this kind of quarter. Well, Dylan, I mean, it's a this is
like literally like shooting fish in a barrel. You're
trapped on a boat with a bunch of hotties. Come on now. And
again, what is it? Lack of options. Oh, there's a quote about it. Anyway,
I'm pretty sure I'd score quite a bit. Yeah. So the guests.
The guests apart. They were incredible.
And I think daffodil fixes the tender at some point.
The tip, let's get to it.
Pat, take it away.
All right.
So let's keep track of this tip.
Uh, cause we, we see the saw this play out in the season of Mediterranean.
The tip was consistently $20,000.
I believe the tip for this season will be $15,000. I believe the tip for this season will be $15,000. This tip is $15,000.
Completely unearned. $1,500 each. I rounded it up. So Cloyce gets shit for the first
dinner from Glenn. And I know that I'm probably like, you know, on Daisy a
little bit too much, but it's stunning to me that Daisy takes no accountability or no blame for this at all.
No, it's just on Cloyce.
It's wrong.
I agree.
Daisy's the one that turned the boat into do pars.
Okay.
She did.
And Glenn, shame on you.
You know, I love you.
And I always think you give good feedback.
You said, and I quote regarding the lovely guests. They were a handful
No, they weren't no, they weren't they were easy as pie. What the fuck are you talking about?
So we hit the town while Glenn eats a pear like a turtle and learned Spanish
Cloyce dresses like a magician and says that Daisy would make a great wife. He's already got the Stockholm syndrome with her
I don't know how he could possibly think that anyways, I'm not saying that Daisy wouldn't make a great wife, but
given the first day, I don't know how you could say that about like if somebody had stabbed me in
the back and said, why'd you stab yourself in the back? I would not think that they'd be a great
partner. No, absolutely not. But he is
Smitten now Danny is still pretty pissed about the punching thing
I get over it We got to move on at some point and we end with more days of our C rat lives conversation with Daisy and Gary
Yeah, she says she's not gonna babysit him this year. Yeah, and you shouldn't because no one cares Bravo
Please edit them out
But also she says you're either going to be on my side
or I'm gonna throw you under the bus at every chance I get,
which is like very intense.
And again, it's three days after the reunion
so I can understand the emotional insanity
of the whole thing, but edit them out.
Edit them out.
Okay, guys, the season is starting.
It's episode 2
We need you to get into the iTunes ratings and reviews. Those have dried up. I listen
I know that people aren't used to it
It's on Spotify's and people don't leave reviews as often as they used to in the earlier days of podcasting
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That's patreon.com slash another podcast network follow us on YouTube social all that stuff. I'm Dylan saying goodbye Pat say goodbye you