Another Below Deck Podcast - I Ran Over a Woman | RHORI S1 E2

Episode Date: April 7, 2026

Dylan and Pat are back to break down foot doctors, Sisco, shotgun weddings, love, comment boxes, tans, clams and more from Bravo's RHORIPATREON: https://www.patreon.com/anotherpodcastnetwork  YOUTUBE: https://www.youtube.com/@badtvpod  INSTAGRAM: https://www.instagram.com/badtvpodcast/?hl=en

You know, how many moms know that paying all too well? The husband wants to golf. And the mom goes, you're going to leave me with these children for five fucking hours? And then the guilt comes because they're your children. You should want to be around them for five hours. But here's the rub. They kind of suck after about two hours. Oh, I'm going on record.

I want my kids as adults. If they want to listen to, I don't want to be around you. Today, after Universal Studios, you guys were horrible children. You don't deserve me as a parent. And that's, I'm hoping you're hearing this right now. Final word, stamped. Thank you. Hi, hello, and welcome to the Patreon exclusive recap of I think the hottest, new bestest reality.

No, Real Housewives franchise on Bravo. It's the Real Housewives of Rhode Island. I'm Dylan. I'm here with Pat. I'm so happy to be here. And a little weird. Weenie boy is here today. A little weenie Kaelan boy is over here today. Hello. We have a lot of business to take care of. He's been really pissing me off. I've been in here for

about 12 minutes. He's been pissing me off the entire time. If I could be honest. Yes, you said something before I had a bunch of animosity that I needed to get off my chest towards Kalen. Okay. All right. First off, Ruby, she's on her honeymoon. We had a lovely, lovely ceremony that we both attended this weekend. The wedding was so fun. Another podcast show. Yeah, I wonder if we should wait for Ruby to get back from the honeymoon or if we should just give our take, our perspective.

I really don't have any negative. The negative is what's fun. It's like when someone did something awful. A dress is awful. The food was horrible. I really don't have any of that judgment. So I don't know how good it would be. Honestly, it was just kind of wall to wall.

Lovely. I mean, my sister was a complete monster the week leading up to it. But, you know, it's her wedding. Oh, maybe we'll talk about that. Yeah, we'll talk about that. Yeah. No, but it was so much fun. At one point, at the end of the night,

me and Ruby were just breaking down and tears, hugging each other. Isn't that beautiful? We couldn't even hear each other. We were just crying. It was so much fun. Well, you know, it's interesting because one of the first people, because I was like a stranger there,

other than your beautiful family that I know very well. Yeah. Dylan was extremely thoughtful and he really cared that I was there by myself because my wife was watching the kids. Yeah. He kept checking on me to make sure. to make sure that I was, I was comfortable being. It was honestly a detracting act every time I did it.

Yes, because I was having so much fun. I talked to Dylan and Ruby's nanny that brought them up. They actually thought of her as their second mom. And she was sharing all kinds of stories about how you guys used to beat the shit out of each other and hated each other. And she was telling me like, she's so happy that now you love each other. Yeah, we love each other dearly. And Becca is a great author. Go get Grandma's Little Secret if you want to really crazy.

actually story. Her aunt, her great aunt tried to kill her and successfully killed her husband. Great true crime story. Whoa. Yeah. 48 hours. Where are you? It's pretty crazy. Grandma's little secret great book. Okay. Let's get into more announcements. Well, yes. We are still going through, because we were so busy this weekend, we had given our little patties, little baddies, the job of trying to find a new rating system for us. for bringing that up. Oh my God. You guys really,

really came through. A lot of great submissions. I have to tell you, multiple submissions they want clams. I think it's clams. I'm fairly confident it's clams. Why is this playing? This is playing.

So many people said clams. I want to say Jen was the one that beat everyone to the punch set at first. And, you know, kind of right when you see it, I talked about the, the young Ian divinity of a true solution.

And I feel that with clams. I do want to couch it for one more week. Oh my God. Just to allow for a few more submissions. Just let's sit on it. Because in order to find just the right fit. I have one. What is it?

Women who have been run over by cars. Ooh. You ran a woman over? Yeah, I did. Okay, moving on. Can I just really quickly? I want to play this because if you're thinking, oh, I'm watching too much, I'm watching too much rooster right now.

Rooster is taking up all my time. Is that Steve Carell? Yeah, yeah. Yeah, if you're like, I don't know how I'm going to make room for this because I've been so full with Rooster. Listen to this. This is what this show can do. Accidents. I ran over a woman.

I've gotten almost driven off a bridge. So I've been there, I've done that with driving. Yeah. I ran over a woman. I always love when people just recite like extremely tragic horrible events as though they are ordering Starbucks. Yeah, yeah, yeah. We're Habit Burger. Yeah.

It was the last time you had Habit Burger, Kay? Probably about three weeks ago. We used to get it all the time. It was up the road from us at Carolla. It was a real treat. Yeah. Wife loves the onion rings. They got great onion rings.

Yeah, they got great onion rings. All right. So it's clams for now and or women who've been run over. Right. Last piece of business, Dylan. Okay. I don't know what got into me. And maybe this is a turnoff for some of the listeners.

But I have an apology. You're bleeding again. I know I am. I went to Universal Studios today. I can't. We're in the middle of spring break, a two week spring break vacation for the kids. I'm really proud of you for coming in here tonight

because I know you've had a day from hell, and I know that you need to decompress a little bit, and I know that a lot of people think, oh, it's a lot of fun. This still work, but I'm impressed that you're here because you should just be rotting on a couch somewhere. We are, I'd say we're close to the finish line of the, we're in our second week of spring break,

uh, spring break vacation for two kids because spring break used to be one week and parents weren't expected to do anything for their little children. Now you're expected to provide entertainment every goddamn second for these, son of a little bitches who don't appreciate a goddamn motherfucking thing. I know. We bring them to Universal Studios today. They go on every goddamn ride.

And as we're leaving, my beautiful daughter, Elliot says, I'm hungry. And I said, well, that's great because we are five minutes from home. We literally live five minutes from studio,

Universal Studios. I said, now I want Starbucks. Okay. From a six-year-old. I said, no, you're not getting Starbucks.

Yeah. We have potato chips in the car if you're that hungry. Yeah. I don't want potato chips. So we get in the car, she starts screaming, well, to the pocket, like screaming like a loser like we're kidnapping her. People are looking at us. We get in the car. She puts her seatbelt on.

I hand her said bag of potato chips. She pushes them so much that the bag explodes, exploding potato chips everywhere. Says, Mommy, I don't like daddy anymore. That was my day. You know what? I can't wait to say no like that, you know, because you're so in the right. You know, it's a real joy to say no when you're completely, you have the high ground, you know. And if people are, if people are concerned about her screams in the parking lot, you know, you just,

I told her she couldn't have potato or she has to have potato chips. She's losing, you know, people understand. Right. And we're strangers and we killed her entire family and we're going to take her to a lake and drown her. Kidding. It's the potato chip thing. Yeah, don't say that. All right.

Yeah. Two things you can't do. That. and hit them in public. Okay. Let me back up there. Shouldn't hit them. I want to apologize to the audience.

I'm in the middle of spring break. I had been watching a lot of television. I listened back to the episode of my first recap of episode one. I was a bit negative. As the audience knows, I am a positive person. I bring light into people's lives. Now,

I was upset, as I'm sure most Bravo people were. We were promised, for this franchise. We wanted old money ladies that hunt poor people for sport, right? On the weekends. Because think about that. We've never had that.

Exactly. And instead, they gave us weed store owners whose faces look like beef jerky. There I go again. I'm being negative. Set of a bitch. Well, I promise to be more...

Uplifting. Yeah, moving forward. Fun, fun episode, 90 bad spray tans. Oh, man. Does that drive me up a wall? Kalin, you still believe in corporal punishment for your children, right? Of course. All right.

Oh, how about Liz turning into Dr. Phil with Rula, telling her that Brian is still, what is that? Well, she was trying to help him out, but Liz is. Well, Liz is a cheater. She was trying to help Rula out, her cheating son of a bitch husband, the foot doctor. Yeah. Yeah. What is that, a podiatrist?

Yes. You can't. With that hoe. You can't be that horny as you're a podiatrist, right? It's like, have a little humility. Okay. You're a podiatrist. You're going to go out and bang people?

And it's ridiculous. What are you? What are you? What do you, like, okay, if Cisco was doing it, I'd be like, you know, it's wrong, but it's Cisco. You know. Kaelan, you know Cisco? No.

You know Cisco. Thong, the thong, thong, thong. Yeah, the creative genius behind the thong song. Now that guy, I get it. All right, let's get into it. Yeah, how many? Before we do, I have to give my clams. How many clams?

I would get this episode. Honestly, a gargantuan amount of clams. I mean, I am in love with Alicia. She is, do I want to do this? I'm going to quote, I'm going to quote, Anchorman. And when we were first introduced to Brick, he says,

years later's. So let me take this again. I'm just, you know, I'm just, you know,