Another Below Deck Podcast - The Buzzard Course | Below Deck Down Under S4 E17

Episode Date: May 26, 2026

Dylan and Pat are back to break down Tuscany, birds, Golden Tee Golf, woodshop class, George W. Bush, walls, dogs with aids, Michelin star sushi and more from Bravo's Below Deck Down UnderPATREON: https://www.patreon.com/anotherpodcastnetwork  YOUTUBE: https://www.youtube.com/@badtvpod  INSTAGRAM: https://www.instagram.com/badtvpodcast/?hl=en

But it was, it was Ben going up to Captain Jason going, hey, you know, that Baltic woman who almost killed everyone on the boat a couple of days ago. And I know that we just did a kind of fear factor edition of dinner. I think she deserves a promotions. Welcome aboard. We're back. Hey, Pat. Dylan, I miss you.

I miss you too. Hey, Kay. How you doing, Bib? Hi, Kaylin. Hi, guys. Hello. Isn't technology great? No.

The fact that we can do this now in 2026, you're in Italy. Kalin's in Long Beach. I'm in beautiful. Studio City, California. And 60 years ago, we had this technology. We were talking to people on the moon. Can you guys, we never went, can you guys hear me? Yeah, you sound great.

Okay, really? That's why I was talking about the technology stuff. Oh, that's what you're talking about the tech. It sounded like this when we were talking to those guys on the moon 60 years ago. Yeah. And not in a studio in Burbank, California. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Well, they were up to

Anybody who still believes that we went to the moon. Do I disrespect them? No, I said no disrespect on my part. Oh, yeah, yeah. Yeah, no. No, technology is amazing. So is below deck. So are you guys.

I love you all for holding down the fort while I am on this nightmarish journey throughout Italy. A land, I want nothing to do with any longer. I don't know if I want to be on earth anymore after this vacation, let alone Studio City or Italy. But no, it's really, really beautiful. And my daughter just keeps throwing up. We're so sick.

But yeah, it's really, really beautiful. And we'll break down the entire vacation at APS at patreon. at patreon.com slash another podcast network. How have you two been doing? What's going on in Los Angeles? Are there still homeless people? Oh, yeah.

Yeah, they're still around. Hey, Dil, do you mind stopping by my house next week? My wife's still trying to convince me that we should go to Spain with the kids in the fall. Just come over and tell some of those great stories about how it's going over there. Oh, yeah. I will, yeah, I'll have a lot of stories,

cautionary tales. It was a bit of a wind-easy. road to get here yesterday and I told my wife to pull over because our daughter was having a challenging time in the back seat she did for a little bit but then eventually we had to get back on the road and the ultimate happened my daughter threw up all over the back seat all over herself was screaming crying and we had to pull over on the side of the road while italian men and motorcycles drove past us and flipped us off i think the language here is is something I'm coming anywhere near being able to even remotely do.

I want to come out. Now, Dill, it sounds like your vacation isn't going the way that you'd like it to. And you're making Italy sound like it's an awful place, and we know that it's not. But it's nowhere near the hellscape, the fucking God-presaken hellscape that is this place where below-deck, downanda is taking place. a place that has one place, one watering hole for these fucking sea rats to party at called Foxy Jax. Foxy Jax. Foxy Jax.

If you are in, if you want to go on a vacation somewhere, you know, be it some hills have Vizhtown in Arizona or some charming place like the Seychelles or whatever, you'll notice that there's like only a couple of spots that you can go to. I'm sure the multiple people have had this experience. And the tedium that sets in is suffocating and overwhelming. And we are experiencing that with the sea rats on the boat, right? We always refer to it as a pressure cooker and a shutter island that they don't recognize is ominous. But now their recreational avenues are similarly. psychosis inducing, okay? And that's

what we've seen tonight horrible episode of television. I'm sitting here thinking, is this the finale? Because this is so bad. But those are my pots. I'm also sick with a sick baby. So I might just not be in a great mood.

Zero pots. Wow. And can you imagine this is Dylan's two weeks of vacation? Wow. How great was that? Okay. Are we putting this on YouTube? Kailen?

We can or we cannot, if you want to. Hey, Kaelin, how's my volume, by the way? Are you watching our monitors? I just want to make sure that I can be heard. You can be heard. Your levels seem to keep going down on that microphone. I know. It's like auto setting for some reason, but I don't have like a levels thing.

We're certainly not going to fix it now, right? Yeah, but you'll pop it up in post. It's all one track, so it would be tough. Oh, man. Okay. You sound fine. And again, we're certainly not going to fix it now. Okay.

All right. Well, anyway, I enjoyed... God, I miss that fucking golden tea. You know what's so amazing? I showed you guys, but look at... It's gorgeous. Look at the rolling hills of Tuscany. Yeah, we have those here in America.

All I want to do is be by that goddamn golden tea. That's my arcade game. Yeah. Yeah. Say what you will about. Los Angeles, there's a bunch of fucking dead people that are still walking around and they want drugs and to ruin

old Patty's enjoyment of life, but it's still a pretty great place. You know what I mean? Oh, yeah, yeah. And it's a marvel. I mean, you know, we kind of get frustrated by it, but think about it, like, it's kind of crazy

to see people that have died still by pedal walking around. It's nuts. Anyways, let's get into the show. I did it's zero bots. Zero bots. Okay. That I definitely like this episode better than you, Dylan. The scene at the tail end of the episode with Ben, who had decided he would take over hell or high water a gas cabin and sleep in it. And then when Jawal came in to demand on behalf of the female staff that Ben would leave that bed because the staff had made that bed,

uh, Ben chose to sully the bed by ripping the sheets off of it. Oh, look what happened. Oh, my God. Look what happened. Well, um, uh, when we were at lunch in, in high school, it was, uh, pretty common if you left your lunch tray to go get ketchup or something. Someone would steal your pizza, your cheeseburger. And, um, you'd have to chase that person. And the best thing you could do to save that food, uh, was to try and sully it, whether it be spit on it or get your fucking gross fingers on it and stick your finger through it.

You just, you had to do something to make sure you would win the war. Make it unedible for the other person. Ben did that with that bed. He basically said, The war is over. I have won. The bed is sullied.

There's nothing you can do now, Joal. This, this goddamn bird. Can you hear this bird? No. I think I can. It might come through. I can't. It's lovely. Consider it the ambience of Tuscan.

It is lovely. Yeah, okay, good. Well, all right. It's staring right at me. All right. Talk about Sully. This bird is my enemy right now. Yes, no, you have to salt the earth so that your opponents cannot reclaim any value. Yes. Get out. Second best part of the episode was, Dylan, you and I have often said with respect to Game of Ors. Alicia attempting to move up the ladder, as they say,

to get, I guess, the second stew position. Norm McDonald, I don't know if he put it in these terms, but he famously had said, as humans, no matter the job, there's always someone trying to take your job, you know? And so when you're a crack, all right, what? What?

When you're a crack wha? You got to sleep with one eye open. When you're a cracker, you've got to sleep with one eye open because there's an assistant crack whore that wants your side of the crack whore. Right? You watch out, crack whore. Anyway, so watch out. I love the episode. It's a really good point.

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And I, I want to start with fish. Ah, the dinner service. We see, well, dinner service, but we pick up what we often do with a royalty-free footage of oceanic wildlife. But this, this was actually really pertinent. to the show.

Because most episodes, it's like, yeah, we get it. It's in the fucking water, right? But this, this time, it was, it was, I don't know the words at 6 a.m. in Tuscany, but it was about fish. And the last episode was, it ended with Ben asking Daisy to fillet nine, nine fillets and fish.

No, no, no, not filets, nine whole fish. That's right. Now, Dylan, I'm glad you started there because it began with horrible dinner service where the guests were, as you pointed out, tasked with removing the central bone structure of their entree, right? Every single one of them. Yeah. And you would ask yourself, why would Ben do this to paying customers? I think I have the answer. Okay. By the time I was in my sophomore year in high school.

This is a personal story? It's a personal story. I've been deemed a lost cause scholastically. So rather than sign me up for chemistry class, you know, or calculus or whatever, I was relegated to wood shop class. So I spent half my day in wood shop class. And in that class, there had been a kid affectionately named Shitbird. And shitbird was an interesting character because you had to keep an eye on it because whenever you weren't looking at him, he would have his hand near any of the buzz, the running saws in the wood show. Okay. He, he truly wanted to horrifically injure himself.

And whenever he'd have his hand near the, the mitre saw or the band saw, Mr. O'Malley, the shop teacher would say, shit bird, knock it off. Ben is shitbird. And you may ask, Pat, where are you going with this? Ben is doing this intentional. Ben is doing this intentionally. Everything he is doing is to self-inflict himself and whatever's left of his fucking reputation the last time he was on here.

Don't ask me why he's doing it. That's between Hibbidah's goddamn therapist. But Ben is doing this intentionally. He is, name one. One God dear meal that he has served this fucking season that you have not mocked. He is being a drunk idiot. He's had horrible behavior. I mean, he's lovable.

He's a lovable, lovable idiot. But right down to this. Let me ask you just a couple of clarifying questions on this. First, I want to say Woodshop is an important institution of America because drunk, angry Vietnam vets would not be a... He was a Vietnam pet. I love Mr. Mellie. He was.

He tell us stories. And then when I asked him one time, I was like, hey, he ever killed him? anybody he almost punched me in the face right right right i didn't know any better those are their stories to divulge um if they want to tell you about what napalm does to skin they can tell you but if not just leave it alone uh because you don't want to hear that anyways um my question about ben doing this on purpose you you would have to think that he was doing it on purpose because um no person in their right mind would just organically come up with this idea right because it's so insane and it's so bad um and this stuff that we saw on the plate is kind of like i don't know i would imagine that people at

the hague are looking at pictures like that and going we can't have this in the world anymore right so why would ben do this the thing about it about him cooking this up is that he looks so bad as well. You know, again, we get to this this shit bird sullying of the earth and I, I, it's very clear that people are going insane on this show. It's, it's Ben holding his fucking pointer finger

right near that table saw. He's saying, look at me, world. I'm a fuck up. Well, it's so crazy that Ben is blaming almost every single other person on this boat except for himself. He's like, these fat Chartergergerers can't pull 50 bones out of

a fish on the paid vacation. What a bunch of fucking losers? And then... I love when he goes to the galley, which has now become the echo chamber of self-conceit because he has fucking the Balkan biscuit there.

Yeah, sure. Clearly winning the game of wars. okay clearly ellie is elie is about to get a promotion and we're not i know we'll get there but we're not for captain jason go i think she's the thing

she would be getting a promotion i think captain sandy or lee would give her a promotion i'm not even kidding i want to say this about alley it's gotten lost this season um she is actually a fucking go get her

when it comes down to it like absolutely is the problem with her is she needs to be kept away from other human beings and knives yeah like I saw like you know what she'd be good at long haul trucking uh-huh or a writer I don't know if that's up her rally because yeah I mean I think she would be great at but both of the entry I was good at that I moved on of course I moved on to greener pastures I I think Ellie would be really good at a lot of things. How about working in the forest, planting trees? I was going to say trying to find some

some kind of creature, a cryptid or something. Bigfoot hunting, I don't know, but definitely get her away from all of us. Get her away. That being said, we love you, Ellie. I think she'll tell you next week. We'll probably have her on. Okay, so Ben tells us he doesn't think Daisy's a team player and who does he tell this to the balkan and biscuit and you're not you're going to be shocked by this the balk and biscuit agrees with him and then both daisy and joll listen is been by the way these walls are made of goddamn paper uh i guess uh the balkan biscuit blames daisy for what she uh feels is silver service um ouch meanwhile at the table uh silver is in silver metal uh silver means uh dog shit service Yes.

Meanwhile, at the dinner table, hot Captain Pants, he tells the guess he's got to step away, you know, but little do they know he's just going to get ready to surprise everybody to bring out that birthday cake. But you're going away by this. He doesn't have time to eat it because he tells the guy, he's a, he goes in a chair and stare at something until it's tired. and I'll probably have to go to bed. He does not hide that he hates having dinner with gas. Can I really quickly? I'd love to hang out with you, but I need to go stare at a wall until I get bored or something. What are going to say?

I would love to hang out with you guys, but all the fish in my tank are dead, and I just want to go back up there and stare at them again and make sure they're dead. There's this crazy thing where he goes down to Ben. And he goes, maybe the understatement of the season. Well, that should have gone better. Yeah. Well, the guests were massacring their dinner again. And you had your Bosen stepping in an at Toga,

who I think resorted to just punching the food because he was so frustrated. Yeah, it could have gone better. Do you know what Ben's reply after he walked out was? he said whatever it is what it is there you go yeah five star service hey sarah um okay

all right so then jena jennah asked jennah how eddie's doing and then jennel lets us know that she's learned a very important lesson this season and that's uh to not seek validation for men and she's now ready for the world and uh she's coming for that stripe

she wants that stripe back i don't have a joke there. It's kind of written in that desire to get that strike back. What? I don't have a joke there. She wants her strike back. No.

Okay. I'm confused because usually when you say I don't have a joke there, you probably do? No, I don't. Okay. Shepard. It's so obvious these fans are or these guests are fans of the show. Oh, 100%.

Who's the second stew? Okay. I love that you picked up on that. Who in the world knows what a fucking second stew is? Oh, you don't think a gay interior designer from West Hollywood like thought of that question out of the blue? I thought that was kind of a planted question. But this is when my favorite part of the show or this episode starts to ratchet up.

because we have Alicia who, I don't know if I have a good analog, maybe Jim Carrey from Dumb and Dumber. It's that kind of character where she starts to think, I could really do this, you know. It's a little bit like, you know, I don't know if George Bush Jr. actually wanted to be president. And I think, you know, the people that wear the masks and do the Gregorian chance, I think they just wanted to bid there or something. He was like, yeah, yeah, I just want to keep you cooking.

Yeah, yeah, he wouldn't have a good time. But anyways, it's insane that Alicia thinks that she could be seconds to. Now, I wanted to, I actually have that, I have a recording of, it was really tricky. to do this to get this recording of Daisy and Jawow talking about egos in the galley

Oh okay. Sure. Kellen, can I have you allowed me to share my screen? No, I've just, there we go. Okay. So this is actual audio of

of Daisy and Jawow talking about Ellie and Ben's egos. Okay. Here we go. Well, that wasn't nice. I would say that they have a death wish, but I feel like they're both going to live to 102. They're just going to smoke the entire time.

my mom's 84 she smoked a pack of cigarette since she was 12 a day okay how's that work yeah so anyways

I don't actually know what they talked about because once they started talking I went to YouTube to try to find that but yeah I think you know they talk about Ellie and Benton being well they said the Balkan Biscuit I heard it after the second cough

the Balkan Biscuits disrespectful respectful bitch and then Ben, I think it was after the fourth cough, he basically takes the position to Switzerland and suggests, hey, why don't we all just talk like adults here? Yeah.

You can play the tape over again, but that's what they said. Do you want me to play the tape? Yeah, go play it over again. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, I think it would be helpful if we just play the tape really quickly. Play the tape over again.

Yeah, let me see. Because it is, You know, technology is so incredible. I'm not going to play the tape over again. Oh, you're not going to play the tape over. No, I'm not going to play it over again. All right, well, minutes later, Daisy and the galley bump heads again over that breakfast start time. Oh, there you go.

Dylan, wrong tape. This is when Joao tells Daisy did he really likes her? Oh, shit. Wrong tape. I am so sorry. That is. And then she told him that she has walls up. That was the wrong tape.

She said she had walls up there. What is crazier, Daisy and Jowell talking with one another about their walls or Alicia wanting to be second still? Because I think it's far in a way, Daisy and Jowell. What are you two doing? Huh? What are you two doing? Talking about your walls.

you literally. Well, I was going to say it is worth mentioning. He did finally climb that insurmountable wall that she built up. The wall built out of one ply tissue paper, apparently, or zero self-esteem? One of the other. No, no, no. It was popsicle sticks and cotton balls. But I'll tell you what.

He was pretty wasted. So it was tough to get over. It was pretty tall. I do want to say this. This boat is a goddamn mess at this point because it could, if they cared about actual service, it could affect service because there is zero communication going on here. They're bumping heads about what time. Breakfast starts.

No one wants to talk to one another. I wouldn't book this boat. And can I also say, I think that, well, we'll get into it. But Ellie is beginning to very, very clear. clearly win the game of oars because she's issued a challenge. Continental breakfast prepared at 8 a.m. Now, what that entails is, I know it entails a good amount of work, but I'm just going to ridicule it for a second.

That's okay. It involves waking up at about 5.36 a.m., which nobody likes to do, okay? Rolling up little pieces of ham. And other things. But she says that when she's presented with challenges, she rises to the occasion. I'm going to kill these birds. Now, the sounds of birds in the morning are lovely,

but they're so close to me. They're almost mocking me, okay? Okay. Should we get to the next morning? Oh, well, I was going to say, yeah, I thought she did a great job. And then Ben kind of reflects back on her and her time on the boat. And he wants to reward her for these efforts. And I think it's important to keep in mind that Ben's recommendation of Ellie and her efforts are coming off a dinner service.

We're paying guests. We're asked to scour through their dinner to look for protein, much like buzzards, do with roadkill. So, yeah. Probably not the past time to. It was, yeah.

You know what I mean? Yeah, I know exactly. You know a little space. It's crazy how much space there needs to be taken from the buzzard course and this promotion, right? But it was, it was,

it was Ben going up to Captain Jason going, hey, you know, that, that Baltic woman, who almost killed everyone on the boat a couple of days ago. And I know that we just did a kind of fear factor edition of dinner, but... I think she deserves a promotion.

When you say it out loud and it sounds absurd, that's when you know. You know what I mean? that's why they're sea rats that's why they're sea rats nothing makes sense well captain hot and i'm going to hold war with these birds i'm going to stop talking about it all right talking about the birds it's a no from captain hotpants and besides uh daisy had threatened to pitch a fucking fit if this actually happened which we all know it wasn't meanwhile eddie visits jenna in her cabin and he mentions the sadness of her demotion.

I want to say this about Eddie. I've come around, Eddie. I know Dylan and I can be harder on these sea rats and then we fall in love with it. We go on a journey, but I will say this. Eddie, you got to watch that drinking, young man. You need to watch that drinking. I really don't think that there's ever been, there are sea rats that we are so repulsive on television that we don't like them. I have no interest in talking to them.

But for the most part, every Sierra we talk to is lovely. You know, they're, they're, they're, they're, they're, they're, they're, they've been thrust out into the world's oceans and, but they're nice people, you know. Yeah. You know, I think, except for Toomey. She sucks. Toomey is a, a, a, a wretched human being. A rap, okay.

Fuck off. Fuck her. All right, let's talk about lunch. As lunch is prepared, a few meanwhiles here. A hot tub overflows. Ben calls Ellie his sous chef. Alicia complains to Barbie about her not being considered for the second. Stuposition.

And I think Barbie, who we really love, truly captures the correct, I don't know, the correct way to process Alicia's gripe. about the hierarchy on this boat. She says, and I quote, who cares? Yeah. The Barbie has the advantage of not having, she just showed her badge

to the employees of Shutter Island. She doesn't know that it's all, you know, fake yet. Okay, she's fresh-faced. She hasn't really experienced the walls closing in. I think if Barbie was, was, you know, Barbie's like any other person on the show. And it would happen to us as well.

If we were confined to the nightmarish hallways of these vessels for long enough, we would start playing the Game of Wars too. And we would look back going, how did we get roped in to such a beatingless contest? But it happens to the best of us. Fair enough. I guess you've got to walk in someone's seabra shoes. Yeah.

Lunch is served. and Ben is asked to have that lobster salad brought up to the table. And Daisy suggests Ben have his assistant bring it out. Now, this is where Daisy begins to lose the game of wars, because what's really important in the game of wars is to recognize hierarchy. Hierarchy is extremely important in the game of wars. Now, it's meaningless, but in this game, it's everything. it's everything daisy is the chief still there should be no situation where daisy ever needs to

really lash out um at a an underling for no reason right uh this battle is between her and ben and ellie has nothing to do with it and daisy's really starting to slip up and the vantage from, I think, us and the rest of the fans is that Ellie is rising in the game of wars with every break of Daisy's sanity. I mean, Daisy's really not, you know, conducting herself professionally. And, you know, all Ellie has to do is keep rolling up those little pieces of ham at six o'clock of the board. She will eventually be driving this boat, I think. Well, meanwhile, shit talking continues in the galley with the door to why. open that never helps anybody

and then the guests depart I don't think we have anything here and then can we just jump to the tip me? I just want to really quickly say that the guests said that the sushi was I believe they referred to it as multiple Michelin Star sushi I'm confused about you know what let's just move on

we don't need to talk about that you sure yeah because you would ask, you know, how could sushi that was pulverized like this be Michelin Star quality, right? So how could sushi that looks worse than a 7-Eleven California role be Michelin Star? Because it's not. But we can move on. Fair enough. Tip meeting.

Apparently the C-Rat. Usually, Michelin Star sushi isn't. homeless people can't steal Michelin Star Sushi but this they can kind of so how is it it's confusing that's a good point

I've actually I've actually heard that Michelin Star sushi joints the guy who's the sushi uh or lady they actually spend two years just working on the rice before they're even allowed to touch a goddamn knife

never mind I don't know, do dishes and make the sushi themselves. That's quite a, quite a jump, right? Michelin Star. In most Japanese kitchens, if you accidentally put soap on the nigeri, you would be knocked out a beggar too. You wouldn't have a knife in your hand mere hours later. I will say there's one shot not to harp on this disgusting pile.

shit that they served these people. But this was a scene where we saw the salmon that was rolled up. And it looked like it had gone through some kind of juicer. I mean, it was

absolutely disgusting. Mishol Mishol and Star. And how many pots? I'm going to set up. Okay. Tip meeting. Sea rats knocked it out of the park,

uh, I guess. 23 grand 1,700 each Eddie gets the helmet just because and this is a new one post-tip meeting

we get one of the more childish sea rat fights of all time and that says a lot because we've seen a lot of nonsense on these vessels Daisy and Ben argue over who gets to read the comment cards first

and I guess that's because the comment cards cards aren't reading this time around. One star tried to pull poison us. One star stuck a maxi pad to my fucking door. One star almost left me to die. That all happened this season. Yeah.

And this should not be as glowing as it is. These comment cards should read two stars still have severe pain in my esophagus. right just because of how little the bones are and how sharp they are and how they get lodged two stars need more peanut butter all right it's time for one of our no this is the last of the season it's time for the preferring redine all right can i can i say though that um there's this moment where I think Joao is getting a little

getting a little too comfortable having now crested the wall of popsicles and cotton balls and Daisy's snoring at night and he goes I think it's the cutest thing he really wants I don't know if they've had sex if he's just being it's it's confusing but Daisy's been a couple back

she's in the throes of the game of horse she's tipping a couple back at night and she's snoring like a drug. And he's like, oh, I think it's the cutest thing of the world. They must not have had sex yet.

Anyways, let's get to the prep and shooting. That's my bad. Yeah, sure, sure. Not much here. It's Brandon and Carmen. We've seen these fools before. I think we haven't interviewed Brandon before, have we?

No, and I want to say, and I, I don't want to sound like such a massive asshole, but is there a less memorable kind of person than a below-deck guest because every time I feel like we we have some package about these guests have been on before I see the package and I go no no no I've never seen these people before my life I've never seen these people one time of my life you do remember this one this one was the one where they showed in the package he goes uh get off the platform and he's like no you dick

or something and he's like so crazy about it Jason goes I will I almost kicked these people off. I have no recollection. Kaelan, do you remember these people? There's been a couple instances of people actually almost getting kicked off. One woman. Do you see the challenge she's having? But I do remember these two fools.

Okay, because the last time they came on, they were with six people that they cobbled together to be able to pay for this boat. And one of the girls, we actually interviewed that I know, who's been on a ton of other reality shows. And she fucking hated these. two people. And all she did in the interview was talk shit about them.

Interesting. She was kind of friends with Brandon. And that's how she got on the show. Anyway. Okay. All right. In the cabins, uh, Daisy asked you out to help shut down, uh, the Balkan biscuits, it's big promotion. This is what you're talking about, Dylan. Daisy, why are you, uh, lowering yourself to this level? Let, let, let it happen. You got one more fucking charter. Then you never have to see this person again. Yep. All right. And what powerful? What a powerful tactic in the game of wars. Just treat it like a vacuum, deprive it of oxygen, go, you know, so you got a promotion.

I don't give a shit. What would cause a fifth, sixth, seventh limb to explode out of Ellie faster than Daisy saying, I don't care that you got a promotion? Okay. We'd get a new mouth appearing on her back. Leave it aloud. All right, let's head on to that, that godforsaken establishment, Foxy Jacks. All right, this was absolutely really stupid. Jowell tells Alicia, he's seen her grow as a person.

Eddie asks about the Daisy tension. And then Alicia then shoots her shot. And she asked Daisy why she doesn't get, why she's not seen as second stu potential. And I believe Daisy says, and I quote, let me get a carton of cigarettes because we're going to be here all night. Daisy says you almost quit once and you almost got fired once, so I don't think you're a good candidate. And, you know, it was, it kind of dawned on me that one of the most important qualities of a high-ranking C-Rat is just reliability. You just have to stay in the trenches. No matter how many casings fall down and burn your legs, you just have to keep firing, okay?

Alicia is one of these wishy-washy people that you, you know, she could depart in any given moment, right? could be like rocky and jump off the boat, right? She's constantly dancing. She's constantly forgetting things. This is not second-stim material. No, absolutely. Maybe in the future. Maybe in the future.

Maybe. We all grow. It's our 20s. We're supposed to be fuck-ups. Now, at the table, J.W. kisses Daisy. And then Ben tells us he doesn't see them working out. I wonder what other mind-blowing predictions he's been keeping to himself. And then suddenly the Balkan Biscuits announces at the table that Daisy's a vibe killer.

And she claimed she said it as a joke, but that upends the whole evening there. Well, I think that, well, once again, this is slippage in the game of Orch from Daisy and Joal. We don't need to do this in front of everybody, right? It's not cute. Everyone's nauseous. Don't do it. Leave it for the private quarters, okay? Because what this does is it presents the C-RAT snipping at their heels with a canvas of,

canvas of vulnerability here lies my heart on my sleep here lies my emotions before you know you can't do that you can't do that okay this is a fucking game of war okay what is wrong

with these two but very important stuff I think that Jenna I think that Jenna and Eddie are the ones that Ellie accuses of bringing the vibe down. Oh, is that right?

I think so. But yeah, it doesn't matter. The whole thing spins out of control, and I'm going to let you carry us to... Oh, sure. Well, at some point, Daisy makes her way over to Ben's table, who's sitting with Barbie, and they've found it funny to keep inching their table away from the other group. I'd argue if this is your little childish fifth grade game, game just fucking go to another well there is no other place to go i guess uh maybe go sit on

the beach with some of those fucking dogs that could bite you and you die i don't know just go back no no no no there's another place we don't have to sit on the beach and get murdered by dogs you could there's a all right but ben is being very childish here and he's such i want to say that that there's the the place that they could have gone is that uh that double wide trailer serving meat lover supreme pizzas they could go there well that's right because that is that is literally the only other option that shack where they bake beat lover pizzas that they go to every other week this has been and i i don't know that we could do the show here anymore it's been it's been fun i would be open to it but i think you know mixing it up a little bit more in polite society

with a little bit more liveliness is better for the season. Here's the other thing. The fucking premise of the show is down under. This means in fucking Australia, you assholes. You fucking cheap fucking bastards at Bravo. This was supposed to be in Australia with Australian people and Kiwis. And then you fucking put us on some fucking God forsaken, who knows what the fuck island somewhere,

that you have to fly and take three separate planes to get to with two buildings and a bunch of dogs with AIDS. Like, what the fuck is this place? Can you imagine going on that arduous journey to go to an island with a bunch of dogs that have AIDS? No! Now, you're right. No more.

We're not coming here anymore. The show's called Down Under. If you want to keep coming here, then you'd call it below deck dogs with AIDS. All right, where are we? All right. So then Ben says, Daisy, buzz off. We're not talking about work.

and then if you're going to keep talking me about work i'm going i'm getting out of here ben takes off and i think is it jenna that follows him yeah jen and he's like why you follow me i like he goes then she follows him and he goes well i'm going to sleep and she goes you're not going to that goddamn cabin because i just clean that fucking thing and he says i'm doing it anyway she goes and cries in her bed and says to herself everybody hates me and then everybody gets to the jacuzzi up there And for some reason, if you remember, Alicia really takes issue with this and then gets Jawal wall worked up. And Daisy is the one that has, I think, the foresight to say, let's not even bother with this.

Screw. Like, finally she's saying, screw this. This doesn't matter. But Joowal decides he's going to be a hero. And look, two things can be true. I think everybody's had this experience when they've gotten a little too drunk. It's called intoxicated. determination.

No, I'm going to I'm going to do that. You watch and then you just, you'll find yourself walking down a road and you're just like, I'm going, I'm going to do this. I'm going to do this. It's insane. I'm going to do this. Jawow

white nighting over the guest cabin is one of the most insanely stupid things we've seen on this show all season. I think. He goes and wakes up the

the cave dwellers to get the keys to open up this room. That's right. Do not wake the Chernobyl people to open up this bedroom. They're sleeping. They're the only important people on this boat, okay? Do not wake them up.

But he does. And he goes in and then locks Ben in the room. And Ben has a real Mr. Bean kind of moment where he just shows his powers, he too can take a duvet off a bed and call someone a wanker.

It was a pretty crazy. Heated exchange. Yeah, it was a heated exchange. Wow. Is next week the finale? It has to be. And by the way, I've already seen the president,

and I must say, it is going to be excellent. Lots of crew members. When I first heard that it's, by the way, this is out there so I'm not ruining anything. Joe and Nate are back and so is Kermit. But there's also like six other new sea rats on that boat with them. And they're all good looking fuckups. It's going to be great.

Joe and Nate are back? Yes. But I saw that too. There's a female chef, Dill, that is phenomenal and she's French. And she is not taking any shit from any. anybody. Okay. It's going to be fun.

Yeah. Ironically, her name is Joy. No. Yeah. Why does that always happen? People are named these lovely things and they're mean. You know, what if somebody was named hell and they were nice? You know, anyways, I need to go back to bed.

But, Bravo, stop doing Joe. Okay? Nobody wants that. I know. I think that's why they did it because they already hate each other. It's the first 15 minutes of the episode. They hate each other. So I don't think that's go up.

Well, this has been a laugh riot. I miss you guys very, very badly. And yeah, love you guys. Go to patreon.com slash another podcast network. I got to coordinate with you guys because the reunion is this week. I mean... Oh, for Summerhouse. I think the Robson and Kailan and I can hold that down.

You got to... When you get back, we'll do part two and part three. All right. Sounds good. Love you guys very much. Love you, too. All right. I'm sorry.