Another Below Deck Podcast - The Uber Budget of Shannon Storms Beador | S20 E8

Episode Date: August 29, 2026

Dylan and Pat are back to break down blowjobs, Franzia, the perils of 7/11 and more from Bravo's RHOC.PATREON: https://www.patreon.com/anotherpodcastnetwork  YOUTUBE: https://www.youtube.com/@badtvpod  INSTAGRAM: https://www.instagram.com/badtvpodcast/?hl=en

Now, with this budget breakdown, we learn that she spends $3,000 a month on Uber. Now, Vicki found that problematic, but for public safety sentiment, I am completely okay with that budget. We'll pay it because it's a serious fucking danger. I mean, it's essentially like, I mean, it would essentially be a domestic terror attempt, having this woman get behind the wheel of a park. It's expensive to me. We are here. We are zooming because we've got sick kids.

Or, well, are Ellie and Quentin sick? Quentin's not sick anymore, but I kind of have it. All right. Lucy's sick. Everybody's sick. Something's going around. Get in the comments. Let us know.

Do you have it? Is this the beginning of, what's that show? What the zombies? This is us? This is. Yeah. Okay. I was great.

This is us? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I love that show. Yeah, it's got that guy Milo Unopoulos in it. All right, let's talk about the Real Housewives of Orange County. It is our favorite television show

to cover. Tonight we had a lot of really, really good stuff like IV clinics and conversations about what the women did the other night hurt them, and just stuff like that. And that's why it's like one of our favorite things to watch. Pat, what do you think of the episode? All right.

I'm going to be serious now. I hate watch this show. I haven't hidden that from our audience. This was the first decent episode of the season. Oh, my God. How could you say that? It's just so crazy. Because finally, there's an agenda and it's real.

Take down Heather DeBro. Take down Heather DeBro. She's had it too good for too long. I don't know how they all came to that at once. I've seen it for last, I don't know, the entire time she's been on the show. It's like she's best friends with the producers. I'm sick of it. She gets to walk through with the perfect edit.

every season. She essentially is on her own show where they cut to her just showing her lavish life, all the property she buys, how well her kids are doing. And now everyone fucking hates her and realizes that she's a self-promoting, self-righteous bitch. Yeah, I mean, eloquently said. I mean, we've talked about it before it's eloquently said. But, you know, I think that, listen, while I'm totally fine with a takedown of Heather DeBrow, you know how I want to slaughter the ruling elite,

but not that she's in that tax bracket yet, but I don't think a takedown of Heather DeBrow, and maybe I'm asking for too much, but I just think that it's incomplete without a takedown of Terry.

I really do. I really do, and I understand that it's not his show. He's not on the show, but I don't know. I just, I would prefer to just have a nice season rather than this kind of sloppy war of attrition,

resolution, you hurt me vulnerability back and forth trench war pairing all the way to the finale of this episode, which we'll see Heather Debrough Greenlit for season 21. But that's, that's why we're here. We're here to have a conversation, a discourse about this television show.

Before you jump to another topic, Terry will be hurt if Heather is taken down because those two are thick as fucking thieves. And he'll get an earful every night about how pissed off Heather Debrough is at the producers and how she wants to fire this one or that one because they allowed this. And he'll have to hear it. So he'll be miserable too. Okay. All right.

That's good. Remember, I can say this now because it's been a number of years. Heather Debrough actively tried to get producers on botched fired when he was on that show. She is always meddling. They're always in each other's projects. They're horrible people. Well, how many oranges would you give this episode? Oh, okay.

And the other aspects I like about this, nothing to say about Carmel's kids. You can't talk bad about the kids. They're under 18. I would never do that. That being said. You've talked about kids before. Have I?

Oh, yeah. Huh. Well, I try not to. Okay. Well, what I'm about to say is... Because you make fun of Luke all the time for his pandas, how he came in front of his mother. No, I know, but you can't make fun of him to. Well, he's, what do you call that?

He's pandas. He eats... He eats... For pandas. Okay. What was going to say? Oh, yeah, Carmela. This is more on her than...

her daughters on cal she i'm not sure if our audience knows this or the poly market these days you can bet on anything you can bet if it's going to rain on christmas in 2028 there are betting markets right now i guarantee and i'll bet six dollars on this that both or one of her daughters end up in porn just how abominable her parenting is for sure and that's sad and i'm willing to go up to eight um And if you want to put money on, and we don't say this with a full heart, we don't say this happily, but if you want to put $8 down on calci.com or falling market.com that one of Carmela's children will become a pornographic film star. You can do that with promo card Bat TV. Get $5 from three bets. I was wondering how you got to get that promo code in there.

Yeah. I mean, they issued us a challenge. And the copy was very confusing. And we were like, we've never seen anything like this before. And they were just like, that's why we're different. And we're like, okay, but we still don't understand. They were like, do well. Yeah.

And they were right. In this moment, it feels like a true solution has been arrived at. So thank you for sponsoring the show. Yeah, and to our advertisers that are always our advertising company that's always yelling on us. Was that baked in? Okay. Okay.

I'm going to give it 14 tits. Oh, also, we are not sponsored by the predicted market. markets we're joking around those are run out of the Pentagon and no one should use that. Okay, so I'm going to give it seven tits. I hate this show. This show is, it has to be the worst show on Bravo. And to have some kind of, you know, it's really kind of alarming to me just how bad the production of this show is because we've got the 20th season. there is an opportunity to integrate some kind of pomp,

some kind of circumstance. You know, when shows hit 20, they really do a lot of work on making this feel like a legacy show. This season is just, we got a new housewife on, and Meatball and Emily are over here talking about how Shane's, you know,

Shane's eating two lean cuisines a day on Emily's back. It's just like, we're just going through the motions. I mean, if you really, it's worse than North. If you really want to have fun, because this show, there's no denying, is reality drama, would be to just throw everything at the wall, which is bring back Kelly Dodd for two episodes. Thank you. Bring back Alexis Benino, which we've seen in the trailer. She will be back for at least an episode.

Bring back all the fucking bad people. at least for an episode, whether or not they show up to a party to wreak havoc, whatever. But it is a legacy. So you should have people from the past. Just remind us why they were important to the show. Why aren't we doing trips to Lake Havasu? Or I'm not sure if we already did that or not. We might have been.

It was just so unremarkable that I don't remember. But anyways, I'd love to see Vicky get beamed in the head with a fucking football. Right, exactly. but just do something that makes this feel like we stuck around for some reason other than the number. It's a horrible show. I give it not one's one orange. Here's another thing. I would watch, I wouldn't want it to be too long, but I would love to have Don and Vicky to sit down for five minutes and talk about.

Exactly. Exactly. You know, stuff like that. Well, we don't have good news on this. No, we do not. And that means that we are going to begin the episode at another horse shit wellness outfit. We're going to be at, we vitalize. And we're going to be shooting a Myers cocktail into our veins and Trevenius kind of Las Vegas recovery.

And that is going to be coupled with fried chicken from raising Keynes. Vicki asks, is this Southern? Yes, Vicki, it is. It's from Louisiana. And Kane is the owner's dog. Now, I want to say this. Also, the brother that got a bit of a chip on his shoulder,

so he bashed his brother's head in. I mean, that's what he said. You know, my wife worked for a kind of a famous actress who would go on quite a few cocaine vendors. And then that would be followed up by these IV people, these revitalized people, come on over to the mansion. We revitalize.

Revitalize. No, we, we, we vitalized. Oh, okay. And they'd, uh, she'd have them over every single day to kind of bring her back to life. I don't think she ever had them over because she argued about who got a bigger bet. She did because she was on cocaine. And honestly, like, you know, people can, people can go, oh, doing cocaine's bad, going on vendors are bad. At least it's like, at least it's showing up.

at least it's like doing the fucking work. These women are just arguing about EMFs and elevators and bad parenting. And bad parenting, you know, people that go on cocaine benders are just bursting holes in drywall. They're throwing lamps at their partners, you know, they're threatening to take their own lives. I mean, there's a lot of stuff going on. So the IVs are necessary, is what I'm saying. Well, I wish one of these young ladies that were working at this establishment to make small talk. Like, turn to the camera out and said, so what were you guys up to?

Did you guys do an all-nighter on ecstasy or something? No, no. One of our friends walks in front of us too much. Oh. Bummer. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, she, and then Vicki chimes in.

She got a mouth full of fucking chicken. Yeah. And she always wants to be in the middle of photos. And then Emily, Emily, who was bleeding all over the place, like a homeless person. She has suffered some kind of grave wound on her knee and says that Shane was not very ceremonious when she returned home. Emily, and we'll get to Shane and Emily just openly talking about how much they hate each other and want a divorce later. but the amount of resentment that I would feel, it's like if I got paid,

what do you think Emily gets paid? 200 grand, half a mill. If I got paid half a mill to recreationally golf, and that meant that my wife had to take care of all of our children. And I got home from a day of recreational golf. It's like, I am pooped. And you know what else? I'm bringing home half a mill.

million dollars. My wife would be grateful for the financial stability and stuff, but she would hate me because, let's be honest, Emily is not going to work. She's shopping. And going to the gym. She's shopping with meatball and getting IVs with Vicki and eating chicken. Okay, that is not a job. Now, I do want to point out, I'll bring this up later. Their entire lives, they did go to law school. I think it took them like eight times, but they finally did pass the bar. They pretended to have some kind of law careers, but that's total bullshit. They have been floated for a better part of 20 years by his parents. They set them up in the house.

They paid their bills. Then this show came along. They've actually never had careers. Well, Emily did stuff with the Innocence Project. And we should, can we just say really quickly, Emily looks incredible right now. What are you doing? Blonde bubbles into your drink. What are you doing right?

When she said at the tail end of the show, I think it was the last line that all that cheating talk and infidelity talk made her just want to go back home to Shane and have sex with him. I wanted to throw up. Well, it's it. By the way, it's not their looks that make me disgusted by them. It's that. Right. And we'll also think of the sounds. The sounds would be Shane climaxing. to me would sound like if you've ever seen like um naked and afraid or alone or something when you corner some kind of rodentia in a hollow log and stab it with a blunt object that's

kind of what jane's orgasm would sound like to me so um i don't want any part of it actually let alone twice in one day my god yeah that's why i'll throw up okay uh let's talk about spike proteins now uh pat and are are we're monthly subscribers to elli Alex Jones, we get all of his vitamins. And because of that, we know that the Jews and the health insurance companies, the pharmaceutical companies pump these things into poor Vicky. And there's not enough chicken in the world that she can eat to get these things out of her body. So pray for Vicki Gundelson. And do you have any thoughts on that? Or can we move on? No, no, no. I just like how Vicki cannot help herself. They start talking about Carmella again. And she's like, I forgot her name.

like just the ultimate petty mean girl bullshit taking that to your fucking uh medicate package yeah yeah um all right so let's get to the often hammer group which is a very legit real estate company because carmella is legit vicky's this you know doing this thing where you're not a developer you're in real estate pretty significantly okay so um Carmela has a little sit down with Heather who is looking for a rental for her 19 year old daughter. Now, we've said before that we don't really understand, even if you have the means, putting your child in a Porsche Cayenne or some kind of, you know, really nice car. I think that we were discussing it on O.C. when Bowes bought her child of Porsche, when we take a look at what the dwelling of Heather DeBrow's 19-year-old daughter,

I mean, it's just, you know what? Take her down. Take her down. Because this is just not okay. It's not okay. Well, Carmelo's happy to help. Little does she know that Heather DeBrow has called her trash behind her back. right and this is this is the main cross of the drama by the way um the the the main issue here is that while vicky is outwardly attacking carmella hather de brough who you know let's just call it a spade a spade she's a little bit of a pussy she hates as fervently as vicky does but she doesn't have the the moxie to actually do it she's not a pussy she's a foamy everything is outweigh outwardly projecting how you'd like to perceive her, but deep in her soul, she is a dark, evil, fucking evil person.

Let's play a game of who's more evil. Heather Debrough or Emperor Palpatine. Well, I mean, Palpatine. He killed people. So obviously Palpatine. But if you're asking me who's more evil Vicky Gundelson or Heather DeBrow, I'd go Heather to Brough. Vicky's real.

Pat, Vicki's not in the game. Oh. I didn't say Vicky. I said Emperor Palpatine. I was bringing up a better example. No, it's not a better example. Okay, this is the game, man.

One became an emperor and killed like a few planets, man. Yeah, I understand that, but that's because he had the means. Heather DeBrow doesn't have access to that kind of technology. And if you would play the game faithfully, you would consider. what she would do if she did have that. So anyways, you know what? I'm done, actually. I'm going to move on. All right. So we got a lot of meanwhile here.

We have Shannon Bador and Jen. They meet up at dog training. Apparently, um, apparently Troy's eaten $12,000 worth of, I guess, worth of Shannon Bador's shoes. Mm-hmm.

Yeah. They're kind of, oh. He said, that's a lie. That's Archie from heaven. He said that's a lie. He said Troy peed on her case. of red wine that she had in her bedroom and she fucking lost it and that's why he's at reconnoissement camp um wait archie i thought archie was in hell no he's in heaven

oh he's in heaven yeah he's in dog heaven with ted oh is ted in heaven too yeah ted had a rough go what happened to ted well he had horrible owners really yeah He's always shining. He's Archie's best friend now. Right, right, right. Now, Archie is dead currently on this show, correct? They don't mention it for some reason. It's just all about Troy.

Huh. Maybe it was too painful for Shanna Bador to even discuss it. Maybe it was too painful because it didn't happen the way that she said it happened. I told you. Oh, that's why you thought he went to hell. No, he was saying that she lied about how he died. Okay. Well, I hope he doesn't have any tattoos, so he can be varied in the correct spots.

So we know that Shannon isn't the greatest dog. Mom, obviously, she murdered an innocent Archie allegedly. Well, allegedly because Archie told us from calling from heaven. But Jen might be even worse. This dog, I don't know, Rico or whatever the fuck. and dog's name is, is just a disgusting creature. But I will say that Jen's solution to him bursting out of his harness that he is too fat for is to get him a bigger one. And that is, that is red-blooded America.

That is, these pants don't fit. Ooh, we're at a fork in the road. do I change my lifestyle or do I just get bigger fucking pants? And this road, we have to travel, is to go up a size. And sometimes that's all you can do. So believe it or not, we're still at we vitalize. This is a cutback. You go five, ten minutes into the show.

You go, I didn't even realize that we were doing a cutback. Now, this is where it gets interesting. This is the mutiny against Heather Debrough. This is where it all forms. I think everyone's feeling out each other like, are we going to do this? Right. Are we going to fucking do this?

After 13 seasons of her being untouched, are we going to finally call her out for her bullshit? Because it has to get sickening. I mean, look at what Vicki Gunnelson has given us over the years. She has all her horrible relationships, all her bad decisions, all the screwed up decision she's made with her children. She's given us that.

Heather Dubrow, squeaky, clean image. That has to really piss you off. The thing that's really, really frustrating for Heather, I would imagine is that, you know, she's manicured this image to, within an inch of its life. I mean, just the little shears on everything, right? And people still hate her. What is the point of all of this revision and control if it's not going to present an image that people like? Heather DeBrow, with this 50 ingredient suflay that she's cooking up, is still loath by the majority of the viewing audience.

So that's got to be pretty frustrating. Because, Dylan, there's a reason why our audience loves us. We're genuine. We admit when we're being douchebags. Have you ever, ever hurt her expel any sense of humanity or being real? Or, like, she apologized. is when people come at her, but you know she doesn't fucking mean it. In the same breath later in the conversation, she's like, all right, I am going to internalize

the feedback, and I am going to work on that. That being said, I think the greater audience fucking loves the Heather Debrough that they see on TV. Well, and are we asking too much from Heather? Because at the end of the day, she is really just a glorified kind of pale wife, right? the kind of of partners that their significant other is a massive breadwinner. So what are they to do? What are they going to go up here on days of our lives for a season and a half? What has Heather DeBrow ever done?

You know, and you gave me shit in the past, rightly so, for ridicule and Kyle. But Kyle was a working actress for years and years and years. Kyle's worked her ass off. I don't know what Heather Debrough has really done outside of be from a rich family, marry a rich surgeon, sit around and dream of the perfect champagne fridge. She did have a show that lasted for a season right around the Friends era, I think I believe, around 1990.

That's fantastic. So Carmela is chatting with Heather DeBrow and really dominates Vicki. Carmela, I have to say, does a great job with the passive aggression. Um, she says about Vicky, you know, I think there's this thing where you get older, when you get older, you just kind of lose that filter. You know what I mean? Um, yeah. When you're older than dirt, you become a true bitch. Right, right, right. And Carmela, you know, she could go on to say, you know, these things happen. You lose control of your babbles. You start not. Your husband's name. Is my husband's name Santa? No, it is not. It's, it's Roodall. And I understand why you made that mistake, but it's not Sam. And then she goes, who are you? And you say, I'm your daughter. And so things like that can happen.

It's very, very sad. Like Betty White. Like Betty White. So she, yes? Oh, by the way, if you don't think it had to be edited out. I got to talk to some producer. Heather DeRoe, it felt like she had to bite her tongue, not to mention. that she did one episode

on Hot in Cleveland 2014 so I saw her pause there and want to say you know I did but she knew better she's learned she's learned you can't bring up a show that you were on

where you did a two episode arc in 2016 when it's 2000 and 2020-26 we'll make fun of you for that that means you have nothing else going on so Shannon and Jen are are talking about

What a fucking hypocrite, Heather Obrow is? Right. And Shannon says you know, Heather is even more mad at Carmilla than Vicky is, and that means she is big. And this, while I understand that the outcome

may be desirous or desirable, it really is a slog to get there. You know, and maybe this is, maybe this is the genius of Heather Debrough, you know, if you're going to take her down, it's going to be a kind of circling the town for weeks on end

and waiting them out, you know, that kind of thing. It's not a very fun watch. Heather DeBrow may come down in the end, but the way that we're going to get there is by accusing her of being disingenuous. She's going to apologize for it. Exhibit disingenuous behavior again. go at it again and just rushing nesting doll all our way to the end.

You think she can hold out that long because one of the things that I hate about this show, although it will be fun to see Heather to have to endure it, is the fact that it does not stop. It is an onslaught that just you think you're over it and then you're at dinner and then again, Emily will turn to you and say, you know, I just think you're always about yourself. And then Heather Bull will rise and say, I thought we were past this.

And then Emily was saying, no, I just think you're a really judgey person. And I think you're better. You think you're better than all of us. Right. And then she'll say, but, but, but I thought we were past this. And it's really important, it's really important for the women to never address that they have gotten past it in theory, only to keep bringing it up until the speech is successful. That's right. It's going to drive Heather Brow nuts.

And I am, I am kind of here for that. Now, Tamrat, meanwhile, echoes that Heather Rowe talked off camera about Carmela, saying that she doesn't fit in with us. Now, this is, this is Heather the Brough behavior that I've heard through the Great Fried through the years, which is new cast members come on. She complains to production. She has a lot of thoughts off camera that you don't hear about. So I can totally see this. And also, Heather DeBrow does not interact with her. the cast in between seasons, which also...

None of them do. None of them do, though. Right. So that's why this show just struggles. So speaking of dogs, Vicky heads over to, why did I say speaking of dogs? I said, this show should be dead and RG should be alive. Speaking of dogs, Vicky does not like Troy. She walks over and she's disgusted with his...

ill manners, his poor training, and his rambunctiousness. She is an older woman and her knee is bad. Now, Shannon and Vicky get down on that. Well, all along before you, move on. She thinks she's just a straight up bad dogma. She brings up two things, actually, to start on her conversation, which I would think it's rude when someone comes in your house. She gets served salad. She says, this thing's dry. And also, I think you're a horrible dogma. You think? That was Archie's last drive. Now, I want you to do me a favor, and I want you to tell me what the title of that YouTube video was. Car, speeding and screeching. Okay.

Okay, cool. So Shannon and Vicki get down on the day. We've got a debt problem here. And here's the issue. Shannon, why are you laughing? Well, I'm laughing because I love the worksheet from 1997. I'm old. Technology scares me.

I get it. But we still have electronic devices. We could whip out a laptop and say, let's fill this in. There's field you can fill in and probably break it down faster than, I don't know. The way that we were doing it 2,000 years ago. Listen, I'm not a big fan of the whole AI craze or anything like that, but I would hazard a guess that if you punched in all of your information and you told AI to budget out a plan for you,

or if you asked Vicky to do one would get done quicker and one would be less the insane ramblings of a hate filled drunk yeah but Vicki's also you know they talk about it

Vicky is a fucking sturdy sturdy woman she has an empire of business she's in her own right the most successful person on this show she had to do everything herself. So she is crazy and she's filled with hate. True. And she's very resentful. And I think that's because she's gotten fucked over by a lot of guys,

too trustful and had to earn every goddamn penny. Now with this budget breakdown, we learn that she spends $3,000 a month on Uber. Now, Vicki found that problematic, but for public safety sentiment, I am completely okay with that budget. Oh, yeah, I would be okay with $10,000. Whatever the cost is... Money well spent. Whatever the cost is to enjoy the chanamador is not loaded on cheap red wine. Because she has so much debt, the wine is so cheap.

She is... Whatever we have to pay to ensure that that bottle of franzia, or that bag of franzia does not slide into her stomach and then fucking conjure her up behind the wheel of a car, we'll pay it. Because it's a serious fucking danger. I mean, it's essentially like, I mean, it would essentially be a domestic terror attack,

having this woman get behind the wheel of a car. Caddy-patties here. Nothing witty to say. I would just actually want to say catty-patty, because I'm going to say something mean about Shannon Bidar. All the wood rolling over her back or 18 different vitamins from Asia, stop drinking fucking booze. you'll feel way better

you know I went to an acupuncturist and I I got involved in a a new life coaching program and I've been doing these IVs and you know I feel a little bit better

but I really do want to make kind of a bigger jump here's an idea maybe coffee for breakfast and not coffee and vodka for breakfast. Start. Now, who knows? Shannon's, we kid. I think Shannon's doing better with the drinking.

But also maybe not. Now, Vicki says, I'll always be here for Shannon, but she can never live with it. And that is a very, you know, people can laugh at that, but that's a very, very real kind of friendship. My family has a drunk named Uncle Hub.

You know him. Oh, yeah. My father does not let my Uncle Hub into the house because if you do that, it's just going to open up a Pandora's box of not good outcomes. Could turn out fine, but might not. Better to just avoid it. And my dad said that despite that, he loves my Uncle Hub.

And he said that I would do anything for Hub except let him into my house. And it's a very, very real thing. I do think that Vicky loves Shannon very, very much. But she will not let her anywhere near her. And that's boundaries. That's boundaries, Bill. And that's important. Although there was a network a number of years ago that the show Big Brother, which I'd never watch,

they decided they would keep the coverage going at the Big Brother house with all the cameras. They had all the cameras set up. And a network would allow you to watch Big Brother, 24-7 and all those people in that house. I would watch a version of Big Sisters where Shannon Bador and Vicki Gundal's in live in the same dwelling. And I would just tune in at 3 in the morning or I'd record hours from 11 to 3 a.m. just to see what those two are up to. Now, let me ask you, would you do the same for Justice Stolo, experiment with Shannon Bador. We've got cameras rigged up in the corners of all

of the rooms and it's just her from 11 p.m. to 3 a.m. Are you watching that? No, I'm not because that's sad. The other show is the odd couple and it's entertaining because Vicky would be like vacuuming crumbs off Shannon's forehead. That would be funny. Right.

There'd be pepperoni that's on her face still that got stuck to it because the cheese melted on her chin. Right. That's comedy. The other if it's what would it look like if it was just shan? Well, we don't want to see that, don't. But what do you think that would look like?

You'd see a lonely drunk woman talking to walls. Oh, well, not talking. Not talking. And Troy would be hiding under the bed. Yeah. You would get involved. There would be a lot of alcohol consumed. There would be a lot of yelling at walls.

And there would also be a lot of running into said walls. Now, the reason why she's yelling at the walls is because, they ran into her. But they didn't because they're walls. Okay, let's get to default. Hold on. Okay. One, if you didn't think this was a fucking

stabbing of Shannon Bador's soul, Vicki, before we leave this segment, says, if Andy fucking fires her, she's fucked. I know. I know. But listen, which of these women aren't All right.

The pros fine. Vicki's fine. Tamrat's fine. No, she's not. Tamrat was not fine. She would explode like a fucking redlined engine. Oh, she'd go over to like E-network because, look, she's a commodity at this point. Tamrat has name recognition.

She'll go, she'll do three or four years of whatever villain shows. Has she done traders yet? She probably has. Yeah. Yeah, she could go on a celebrity relationships with Dr. Drew, whoever he's trying to get to overdose these days. But, yeah. Now, Tamara, Tamara, let's have a conversation because I think that you're doing well,

but the problem is that you've not yet overdosed. So talk to me about why that is. Why haven't we moved you on? I didn't think that we were here to do that. Oh, no, we are. No, no. I got quite a good track record. I think we had 32 cast members on celebrity rehab.

I think one-third are dead. Now, that's not all on Dr. Drew, because, you know, anybody who's been around an addict knows that it's very, very difficult to rehab that. Now, what doesn't help is a leniency about what they can do with their lives, which, you know, Dr. Drew, you know, I actually don't want to the show. Oh, you don't think giving them a paycheck to show up on television, to glorify their lives and their addiction? You don't think that's a bad idea?

Well, I think Dr. Drew would argue that there's no glory in it at all. No, I said glorifying. No, I know, but... Oh, oh, I see. Glory is the opposite of glorifying. No, glory is the main ingredient in the process of glorifying. He killed a bunch of people. Okay, allegedly. And he did not.

We just have to be careful. You know, because we got a lot of people listening. And, you know, things can get back to our old. I like Dr. Drew. He's been in my house. Yeah. Yeah. He told him he should run for mayor.

That's how mentally unstable he is. Okay. Let's get to Meatball, Chena, and Jim. Something happened to Meatball's face. What happened to Meatball's face? Hmm. I don't know. Okay.

We're going to be getting to know Carmel. a little bit more. Without her being there. Now, the funny part, Dale, and you brought this up, is maybe this is only in the OC, they go to one of those stores, again, that you brought this up. They can't be defined by anything. What it sells, what it specializes in. I saw some plants.

I saw some chotchkes. I think I saw some clothes on a rack. Yeah. What happens in the OC, evidently, is, you know, there's a lot of wealth in the O.C., right? And there's a lot of hoarding. So when the estate sales hit, these shops go and they buy everything up. And they take all, essentially what the shop is, is a kind of migration of a bunch of dead people's shit into their storefront. So they're selling purses.

They're selling cups. They're selling cupcakes. They're selling animals. They're selling weapons. I don't know what these businesses are, but they are thriving. I think I saw fish. I think they were selling, like in a bowl. No, no, no, I know.

I'm telling you they sell reptiles and fish as well. And Birkenbags that aren't Birkenbags. It's like, okay. So we're going to be getting to know Carmela because she's throwing a day at the ranch, which is not a ranch, it's a gaudy DJ Calais music video, rented mansion. Okay.

Now, Meatball speaks. on Carmela and Danny and she's really getting in the mud here she's she is doing her best to get that season you're 100% right she realizes her jobs on the line so she realizes now I just got to just say horrible things about people and it doesn't fit her it really doesn't because it's coming out of nowhere she goes I don't think Danny and Carmela are going to work out oh really meepal like you and Travis are like there's going to be a wedding for you to meetball based on what she says these arbitrary things she reminds us a little bit of us where we speak very very clinically on people who we've never met in our entire lives we have no clue but we're often right

but but gina will go gina goes like um she's met carmella for i don't know her total of uh maybe six hours and she goes you know certain people are cut out to be cheated on and forget carmella's not meatball what what what what hole did you pull that out of. Oh, someone went to confidence school. Wow. Which is hard to believe because you're married or are going to marry that bore. Actually, you're both such bores. And if you two perfect people ever decide to get married, the theme of the wedding should be basic. Because that's, that's what you are. It will always be. So Emily is sick of being called aggressive. And she's like, I'm sick of it because Heather's not getting called aggressive.

And Emily is, this is where, you know, I got to say again, while I appreciate the desired outcome, Heather going after Debrose is one of the worst storylines I've seen on this show in some time. Emily going after her though. Yeah. Yeah, because it's annoying because Emily is like, unlike Heather Debrough, who just talks about a perfect life, I share the deep stuff. like my son not eating french fries it's so weird that Heather and Emily are kind of like mirror images of one another where they're both kind of disingenuous

and that Emily manufactures a lot of chicken little stuff with their family right so she'll talk about oh Shane and I are going to get a divorce even though we feel like they're you know they're probably not it's just who would want them

right right you're stuck with each other No one would want you. Definitely no one would want him. It's like an Adam West, Bam Bam Pal can't be marital trouble thing that she's drumming up. And DeBrow does the other thing with the projection of the perfect life. But if there has been a cast-wide memo that's been signed by everybody except for Heather DeBrow,

it seems like Emily was the one that said, I'm going to spearhead this. And that's not. that's not entertaining. If Vicky was doing it, dare I say, if Tamara was doing it, it would be much more entertaining to watch. I agree, but here's why I'll break down each cast member

why they can't. Vicky, this is her season back. She just out of nowhere comes after Heather DeBrow. She already went after Carmel. But Heather DeBrow has now given her excuse to come at her because she told her to shut up. So now Vicky hates her for that reason, because that's just how basic Vicky is.

Tamrat has been accused of being a mean girl for the last two seasons. She's trying to ease off this season and be in the background player as a background player, right? So who does that leave as someone who can be an aggressive player to go after Heather Debrough? Emily and Meatball. Right. And who went to Paris and said we need to save our fucking jobs? Emily and Meatball. That's right.

I mean, we cracked the code here. Patty, you've done a lot of great investigative work. Thank you. So, Bono, Sarah. Let's sit down with Shane and Emily and a little anniversary dinner. Okay. Now, it's very, very tough to leave Luke at home because he looks out. He's a little son of a bitch.

Doesn't like to eat French fries. He kills pandas in his free time and he's fucking, he has an iPhone that he can text his parents. Who gives him an iPhone? Now, this is what I was talking about earlier where you said, you know, we don't talk about children this way. It's beneath us. Oh, shit.

This is what you're talking about. I'm sorry. You're right. Yeah, no, it's okay. Yeah, no, it's okay. Now, we sit down to dinner. I don't like that kid. He's goofy looking.

No, we sit down to dinner and Emily orders a steak. And Shane orders chicken al-Franda. Okay. Where do you think he gets the fucking pandas from? My God. Can I have a bite of your steak? Ew, I don't like it. Actually, no, I don't want to.

Now, Emily and him openly joke about divorce in a really, like, just a weird way. You know, we're not judging anybody's marriage. Your marriage is your marriage. But do you ever, like, joke with your wife about divorce like this? No, we've never even said the D word to one another. I know. It's just really kind of crazy. By the way, can we get back to their order, Dylan?

I'm sorry, I had a joke about this. I thought he only ordered big goals. Right? Walking through the gauntlet that is 7-Eleven, a tactical mission of survival depending on the location. Oh, yeah. through the door, stacked with bombs, right? Then pass that corridor, hopeless losers hovering over those scratchers, like their life depends on it.

Or it might change if they hit it. So technically shame works. I want to talk about the hurdles, the game of Frogger that you play when you go into 7-Elevens, again, location dependent. The first level will, of course, be some kind of subdued zombie who will make an effort to extract some kind of money out of you, but because you're playing the game of 7-11, you'll need that money to get a rotten banana and a slurphy, right? So the first thing you do is you defeat that person by ignoring them or saying, leave me alone.

You go inside. The second obstacle will be the pile of drool that the homeless person is left behind before they were kicked out. That's very dangerous. You can slip, you can fall. But you can sue if that happens. You don't want to do that because it's just a quiet, Quaint Indian family that owns it

their franchisees. It's not their fault, right? Then you will have to bear down on the kind of radiating heat coming off of the tequitos that have been rolling there for the better part of 72 hours.

But the good news about this game is it's a little bit open world. So you see the tequito. You all think it's just a tequito, but when the robber is coming, which is you know, the final boss, you can pick those up actually and use them as weapons because they do weigh about as much as a cinder block. They kind of defy the laws of nature in that way. They are not to be

consumed. But we could talk about 7-Eleven all day. I would have grabbed a hot dog because generally they're a color of a hue of red that I don't even think that Home Depot has color of paint that they could determine what it would be called. The game of 7-Eleven has everything. It has foraging. It has puzzles. It has combat. You know, you could go and get a snack, but you have to investigate.

You'll pick up a lunchable and you'll go, oh, this is just fair that they're selling. No, no, no. You have to flip that upside down because what you don't know is that it's been there since February. There's a mold growing on the second to last slice of turkey that if you eat it. you might perish. So it's just a lot of, again, Shane eats there.

Okay, let me just say this. Okay, these two fuckers. They talk about divorce, but I stand with my prediction a few episodes ago. They'll never get divorced, and not because they don't want one. She'd love one.

It's because who the fuck would fuck them? Yuck, dork. I think Emily looks beautiful. So, Emily says sometimes I wonder, how Shane and I have made it. And we talk about Shane being the stay-at-home father. And his resentment towards Emily after she has a,

so she'll have a crazy day of like vaginal rejuvenation and then shitting on Heather DeBrow over some kind of like lemon water, right? And then she'll go home and she'll scroll on Instagram for three hours and she'll fall asleep. And Shane has had Handa and the, the other two children for the better part of a day. So he's exhausted. Now, all he wants to do to cut loose is suck down 64 ounces of Dr. Pepper and then throw a

Thanksgiving lean cuisine on the low of her back and relax, right? But sometimes she says no to that. So there's a lot of tension. Now, let's take the 65 mile. And who could blame her? That stuff's hot. Let's take this 65 mile. Yeah.

You take that out of the microwave after two minutes? Oh, my God. Third degree burns. I know, but he doesn't like it if she's not burning. If it's lukewarm and it's just, you know, he can't make those sounds of a dying badger. So let's get to- All right. I want to talk about Rancho, Santa Fe.

Yes. Vicki Gundelson, the nonstop complainer about things that make her feel uncomfortable. This place, you know where Oceanside is, right? Yes. You look at it. You look at your lovely daughter? My little baby girl just woke up. Yeah.

That's where this place is. It's a little inland of Oceanside. So somewhere between Orange County and San Diego. Closer to San Diego. Fair enough. I did a just for fun last night while I was watching the show. It was 10 o'clock. It said how long would it take to get to Los Angeles to Rancho Santa Fe?

It was an hour and 45 minutes. Granted, it was 10 o'clock. But it's not like it's fucking Arizona, Nicky. Yeah, but it is Arizona. If it's any other time other than 1045 and 1045 and 9, people do this thing all the time where they go, we're going to do a bachelor party in San Diego. Oh, well, I don't want to do that. Oh, why not?

Well, San Diego is boring. And also it's a three and a half hour drive. No, it's not. It's just two hours. In no world is getting to San Diego two hours. Okay. That's because they've never figured out. what to do with the fucking 405.

You start getting down near San Diego like an hour out and you're just sitting there. They've never fixed that. I'll never go to San Diego again. It's awful. All right. So the Pilates, the ladies all get there. And Carmela lays down a mandate to her family. I don't know what that mandate was.

I didn't finish the note. I think it was be nice to everybody or something. Talk to people. And they do, they interact. The daughters interact. She's got a son that interacts. Everyone's nice. They're hugging.

Yeah, everybody is really sweet. The kids are great. Now, the Pilates reformer in the living room. Not sure what to say about it. This is what happens with these people that live in homes like this. So often, you'll walk into a multi-million dollar home and you'll go. It's not an open can of dog food on the dining room table necessarily, but it is trashy as fuck. You just see all of these little things where you go, you have money, but you have no fucking taste in anything.

One of the richest guys, he was a doctor. This is 20 years ago. I'd walk into his house and you're greeted by one of the worst paintings of him. Right. like he had a self-portrait painted of himself. It was poorly done. It's trashy. And it was trashy.

Vicki waddles in. She's completely unsure what to do. She's unsure where to go. And Camille says, hey, Vicki, let me introduce you to the kids. She said I left behind. And we got to Vicky and she goes, she did leave them behind. Now, Shannon arrives and shoves her finger up Vicki's ass. And then DeBrode arrives.

And we get down on some hot dogs. Now, Pat, I wanted to ask you, what is your preferred topping situation for a hot dog and do not say, I don't eat hot dogs? Yeah, okay. So this was real fascinating conversation on Barstool in 2017. Right. Yeah, we, who gives us shit? What, putting ketchup on a hot dog? I don't eat hot dogs.

One almost killed me in August of 2023. You remember that? Yeah, I remember. But what did you put on it? Mustard. You didn't put ketchup on it, did you? No. And you never have put ketchup on it.

But I do remember the soggy nature of that bite. And as it was going down my gallant, I said something's a miss here. And I paid dearly for that. Yeah, the thing about Dodger Stadium hot dogs is that people always refer to the quality of a good hot dog as having a snap. Now, when you eat a Dodger dog, it's more like some kind of astronaut food that immediately gives away. It's almost like it does not exist. There's a faint tension there, but your teeth can slide through it like it's a warm marshmallow. But it's not.

It's pig guts churned up in a vitamin X and spread into a tube with nitrates and some kind of solidifier. And that's what poisoned Pat three years ago. Three years ago. Yeah, three years ago. Yeah, that's right. But I'll tell you this. You've never put ketchup on a hot dog, have it? No. You don't do it. It's not done. This is not something that's done after the age of 10.

So, Carmela and Vicky, evidently, are best friends now, even though Vicki hates her. And then we get to Heather Debrough saying that everyone, it's time for Sondria. I don't know if this was a contrived thing that she was doing. I don't know if she actually thinks it's called Songria. I don't care either way, though. Can we move on? Well, it's the Peruvian pronunciation. If you're drunk and also stupid. Right.

Yeah. Okay. So, yeah. So, um, Meatball does not know how to behave around Danny. Okay. Now, I think that Meatball, let's give her a little bit of credit. She was,

or a little bit of grace, I should say, she was cheated on. So maybe this is a little bit triggering for her. But to Meatball, I would say, Meatball, it's not that big of a deal. He's just like a boring golf professional that has a sex addiction.

You don't have to like really get to know them or anything. There's not a problem here. Okay, so this is where we get to Meatball and Emily really trying too hard to the point where it's extremely offensive what they're doing. Because there's a time and a place for this. Was this where Meepal asked her like, hey, Carmela, are you cool with, are you still liking Danny now? Although he's a cheating piece of shit. Was it something that was it Gina that brought? brought that up for Emily and

Gina Meatball we're talking about. Yeah, it was both of them, I think. And Carmel's like, I just, I'm doing everything I can to move on. And, you know, my kids love it. So it's, I don't know what, I don't know what can be done about this.

But what I do know is that Carmela is taking inspiration from the women. We're talking about blood jobs. And this kind of leads her to tell her husband, who is getting everybody sangria, he's getting everybody tubes of meat. And Carmela says, thank you so much, honey. I'll give you a blowjob later. Now, she says this in front of her teenage daughter, which that's cool.

That's the way she rolls. But your thoughts on Carmela openly talking about sucking cock in front of her daughter. I'm seeing, looking at betting markets on Cal Shee, they already have this bet up. You can bet. You can actually win back. If you bet put down 10 you can back too if they're in porn by by 2030 so I'm going to put that money down okay yeah yeah that's a pretty good uh that's pretty good solid investment and we're

just kidding she seems like her she seems like a really lovely young woman and yeah i didn't say her kids were bad i love i love calci you can they call it trading you can bet on climate crypto anything financials politics, sports, economics. I love it. Right. Now, the Trace Amegas are bullying Heather a bit, and they say, you know, we're going to take a picture with one another. Why don't you take a picture with yourself? This is, you know, really solidified. This is the goal. Okay. We're going to ruin this woman's life. I wonder if Heather Debrough realizes she's been marked for death at this point. I think she does. I think she does. Yeah. She can, she can smell that they've rubbed some kind of

invisible residue on her that she can't get off. It's the demented mark of death. Now, we wrap the show up with a couple of little chats. Um, we've got, we've got, um, Karm talks to Vicki. Hey, uh, did you mean it when you apologize about me being a horrible parent? Uh, why didn't say you were horrible parent? No, you did, though. You kind of did. Well, agree to disagree. And then the ladies get after Heather about telling Vicky to chill out.

Now, this is how you really know that she's been marked. Heather told Vicki that she was out of line for saying that Carmilla was a do-nothing bitch and a horrible mother, which to anybody, they would say, yeah, that's okay to do. I think it's okay to intervene and tell somebody to stand down. But Tamara says, you know, you brought up how abusive your father was. You're trafficking in the same behavior. And Heather must not know what the fuck hit her. She goes, what does that have to do with my dad?

I told Vicki to stop calling Carmela a whore and a bad mother. You brought up your dad. I don't even know what reality were in, Tamara. Now, Vicki leaves and Meatball, it's very upset. She goes, I can't believe she doubled. book this. I mean, it's just crazy. Meatball, what did you give a shit about? My God. I'm telling you. She's on a mission. Now, we end the episode with the ladies breaking down the tricks of the trade of a cheating husband. And we wrap our episode with a little look at next week. We'll be back to talk about all of it.

Ruby is at a wedding this week, but she will be with us next week. Until then, get in the comments. Let us know what you thought about the episode and more. We love you guys very much. Go to Cali. Use promo code, Bad TV. I'm Dylan saying goodbye, Pat, say goodbye. Later, dudes.