Another Below Deck Podcast - This Is The Last You’ll Hear From Me | Below Deck Med S11 E15

Episode Date: September 15, 2026

Dylan and Pat are back to break down chili, Yoda, sunflowers, POWs, mint julips, Saving Silverman, background checks, Lionel Messi, superpowers, Wanted, tubing and more from Bravo's Below Deck Mediter...ranean PATREON: https://www.patreon.com/anotherpodcastnetwork  YOUTUBE: https://www.youtube.com/@badtvpod  INSTAGRAM: https://www.instagram.com/badtvpodcast/?hl=en

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Starting point is 00:00:00 Jen does a little inventory on what's been happening to her, aka what she has been causing herself on this boat. Is this calling her mom? I'm not sure. Hmm. I think it was more her just listing, like, you know, Joy's mad at me. Luke and I didn't work out.
Starting point is 00:00:26 Yeah. Oh, this is when Kat's mad at me, all this stuff. Kermit comforts her and how Kermit tries to solve this problem and make Jen feel better. It says, I have an idea. You're demoted. You see that small room that's very hot and no one talks to you all day? Right, right. It's called the laundry dungeon.
Starting point is 00:00:46 Go in there. Hey. Hi. Bad TV. Oh, all right, that's a little sign. That means we've hit painter. There's gold there. All right, you fuck.
Starting point is 00:01:21 We almost got in a fight last week. We are, he told you to be careful with that thing, man. All right. So it's bad TV. We are here. I am Dylan. That is Pat. Permission to come aboard.
Starting point is 00:01:32 Uh, Kaelin is here too. Hello. Oh, and my gosh, I completely forgot. Lola coming up. We're going to talk about Lola. You know Lola. Oh, I love Lola. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:01:44 You know, the holidays are just around the corner, Dylan. They are. But let's talk about the show. Okay. Hey, by the way, if some unsung barnacle, by the way, for any newbies that are kind of coming in and finding us, barnacles are the name of you. That are the listeners or viewers. If you weren't sure what he's talking about you's talking about you.
Starting point is 00:02:04 You're a barnacle. If you want to throw us like 500 bucks, we'll buy a camera so you can see what fucking cane looks like. You're also interested about what that laugh. And you're not asked the fans for money to buy a camera. It's very unbecoming. I'm not floating that. Well, we'll float it eventually. It's, it's, I'll say it again.
Starting point is 00:02:20 It's unbecoming to ask the barnacles for money to buy camera. Okay, we're a professional outfit, okay? We got money. Listen, I'm very grumpy today. He is extremely... What was that face? Oh, were you going to say, I'm always grumpy? Not always.
Starting point is 00:02:38 This week you've been pretty grumpy. It's Monday. I saw that email you sent to the PR people over at Bravo. It was pretty grumpy. Well, I'm pretty grumpy with them. All right. So he's been very, you know, just, I don't know. He's on a high horse right now.
Starting point is 00:03:00 And I made this chili yesterday. And it was really bad. And my punishment for fucking up the family's chili is that I have to consume it. So I've had about two bowls of chili today with so much cinnamon. Like, you can't even. It's disgusting. Cinnamon. You know what?
Starting point is 00:03:17 I, for some reason, thought that it was a ubiquitous ingredient in chillies. I thought you throw some cinnamon in there. Because my wife, I had given her a sampler. She said that it was lacking everything, but I thought it had no depth. So I put some bay leaf and some cinnamon in there thinking that it would add depth. It didn't. It just made it taste like a dessert with beans and meat. So I'm just chock full of that almost shit myself.
Starting point is 00:03:50 on the way over here. We have below deck to talk about. I was keeping. I was keeping. Sorry. I'm still dying, by the way. Way to go,
Starting point is 00:03:57 Kay. Oh, Kelyan. Oh, okay. Sorry. Yeah. also doing Real Housewives Orange County, and of course, you're here for Below Deck.
Starting point is 00:04:24 And we've been firing on all cylinders of our podcast show, another podcast show. I think you're doing great. Thanks. I'm still a little foggy with all the medication I've been taking. Yeah. But anyway, I think I covered all that. Yeah, it's all coming. And, you know, fun time, actually, we just found out recently from Mary Payne over a Pinkshade
Starting point is 00:04:46 about the kind of content that the ladies are doing at Double Wives of Superbubman Wives. you know, we thought that they were kind of just sitting on balloons and sitting on eggs, but they're actually, uh, queffing semen out and on top of their partners and stuff like that. And they're, they're like, essentially trailer trash from Missouri. So it's a fun show. Well, how long are you going to pay five bucks to see people step on ants? At some point, you got to see someone get banged. Hey, yeah.
Starting point is 00:05:09 I mean, this is the problem. You know, we always want progression. We always want growth. We always want more. You started balloon popping. You graduate to eggs. And before you know it, it's, it's, you know, scatological. nightmare stuff. Kalyn, this kid is walking around. All right, we have to get into the show.
Starting point is 00:05:24 We have, before we get into our knots, we have some, I want some updates. I want to cover some updates. Okay. Okay. This is a little spoiler, so just skip like 30 seconds if you don't want to know this. It's been learned that the new season is being filmed and Cooper and Joy have been welcome back. They are currently filming now. You may hate that. I think it's going to be good. Is it the new season of med? It's the new season of med. Okay. All right. So we're through the spoilers there. You wanted people to fast forward? Well, I don't know.
Starting point is 00:05:53 Some people don't want to know the new cast, but that's caused some real problems with the current cast. And another update, Nate, Gallagher. Wait, wait. What do you mean it's caused problems? People are unfollowing people. People are pissed off that they're being re-up. Some people aren't being re-uped.
Starting point is 00:06:13 Things like that. Are you talking about there's C-Rat infighting? That's right. Wow. Fly on a wall. That's right. I'd love to be a fly on the wall. I would do.
Starting point is 00:06:23 All right. Second update, Nathan Gallagher is still on the run. He's still on the run. Yeah, fucking piece of shit. You know, I was thinking about this on the drive-over. You live here. Oh, right. As I assume he doesn't listen to the podcast because I kept making fun of his bald spot in his head.
Starting point is 00:06:44 That was before he choked out his girlfriend. That's right. Right. So, but if someone that may know him or knows his whereabouts that's in contact with him, please pass this information on to him from old Patty. Turn yourself in, you fucking loser. Face the music. Right, right, right.
Starting point is 00:07:01 Get it over with because this is going to be hanging over your head for the God and bless your life. Try to say you had postpartum depression. Or something like that. See if it works. Well, some people might have a problem. Oh, people are very, very touching. You're very touching with that. All right.
Starting point is 00:07:13 By the way, we support. Whatever you do. whoever you support. That's right. We don't like to make waves here. But Nathan, turn yourself in, you goddamn loser. Yeah. Then face the music.
Starting point is 00:07:25 Then get your shit together because you're going to have this kid that's going to be looking for his dad in a couple of years, even though you're a complete fuck-up. Yeah. And if you want a shot at having a shot with him, get your fucking shit together, you fucking loser. Yeah. I mean, it's his choice whether or not he forgives you for choking his mom out. But, you know, you might as well give it a shot.
Starting point is 00:07:43 Turn yourself in, you'll loser. Thank you. Let's get into the show. Knots. Can I go first? Sure. I love these ladies. It's such a fun group on this show.
Starting point is 00:07:57 I adored some of this fangoli work that Sandy was kind of a foot with this evening. Sandy had a lot of great interventions that led to good TV. And we're very, I would say, satisfying. It's very, very satisfying. dare I say joyful to see Sandy come down on Nate. And had he not choked his girlfriend out, there's no way he would have been back as a Bosen under Sandy next season. Choke or not choke.
Starting point is 00:08:28 Bravo loves fuckups. I think if they were to do anything, they would have brought them back and Joe would have been Bosen and Nate would have been underneath him. That would have been magic. Jen continues to be a person that I wish was older and more powerful so that we could really let loose. But she is a young woman and I feel bad.
Starting point is 00:08:56 With that being said, we've spoken about it before. Nature and Nurture, I think her nature is darkness. I'm going to give this episode 99 minus 45 pots. I don't even know what that is, but I thought it was a good episode. Kaelin, what's 99 minus 45? 44. Is it really? I don't know.
Starting point is 00:09:20 No, I think 90 minus 46 is 44. Well, you're the mathematician. I am the mathematician. What are we talking about? I can't do 99 minus 45. What is it? 54. 50.
Starting point is 00:09:30 I give it 54 ponds. I am so sorry. I don't know why I did that time. I am loving this season. I continue to love it. The drama continues. And I'm not going to lie. I love Messi.
Starting point is 00:09:44 He's like a positive little Buddha. He's got like wonderful energy. He's awesome. Knowledge. He's like Yoda if Yoda smoked Lucky Strikes. Unfiltered. Absolutely. Yeah. For all those reasons in many, many more.
Starting point is 00:09:59 You imagine if Yoda smoked? Yeah. You could, right? You're imagining it right now. There's a scene that Empire Strikes back where Luke is like, I feel like someone's, I actually smell Palmalls. Holy shit. What's this gray thing behind me? Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Starting point is 00:10:20 Yota was very spooky. And then he's, he always like, oh, my girl. You do a great Yoda. Thanks, man. Hey, who's your favorite Yoda? My favorite Yoda. Yeah, what's your favorite Yoda? What do you mean?
Starting point is 00:10:34 Well, is your favorite Yoda the one that's old, creepy, and dying or not dying? I don't know. Or that fucking CGI bullshit? Yeah, the one that's, oh, no, I hate all that. Oh, I love the one. By the way, I would love to just do like, like, Empire Strikes Back, where it's all just like real people and then have that scene from clone wars where they're running around that.
Starting point is 00:10:53 You know what? It's like a fucking cartoon. We can't do Star Wars stuff. All right. That's on me. I've done the arithmetic and the Star Wars. 14 knots. I'm really out of line.
Starting point is 00:11:05 Kaelin, how many pots would you give it? 100 pots. Fantastic episode. Um, okay. Where are we? Well, at the beginning of the show. I can start us off while you look for your notes, I have a great jumping off point.
Starting point is 00:11:24 Well, we all have a great jumping off point because the show provided us a great jumping off point. Right, the flowers arrive and Jen is completely destroyed and joy is overjoyed. You know, I was thinking about this. It doesn't take too much to make a sea rats day. It's just any stimulation. They're like prisoners of war,
Starting point is 00:11:44 and it's like Christmas, and you hand them like an Xerats. portion of rice and they're ready to like make out with your fucking feet. Uh-huh. It's like Santa Claus delivered that rice. Oh, thank you. You know, it's like those flowers look like shit. Right, right, right. And more importantly, he fucked your coworker and came on the Bosen's sheets and didn't
Starting point is 00:12:06 clean them for three days. And so it's very confusing that you're so happy. Well, I also, I don't want to step on that point because it's absolutely true. He turned those sheets into a science experiment and then was such a pussy. then he got the fuck out of there because he didn't want his balls busted about. Right. Yeah. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:12:22 And those flowers look like shit. But she's so excited. They do look like shit. Can you imagine the florist asking him questions about what he wants the bouquet? What's the cheapest? Yeah. So do you want... I would say the cheapest is probably two wilted sunflowers in mudwater.
Starting point is 00:12:46 Yeah, do that. Send that. Is there anything cheaper? Have you ever seen a guy on Valentine's Day at the shop? You can tell he hates his wife, or he's cheap, just cheap. I've heard this conversation of waiting in a line with him with the $144 thing of roses that will die tomorrow. And I'm like, oh, my God, why am I doing this? And the guy's asking the floors, what's the cheapest thing you got?
Starting point is 00:13:07 Yeah, Divorstown. You know, going to a florist on Valentine's Day is a little bit like going to McDonald's in an airport. They've got you by the balls. You need the egg McMuffin. It's going to be $18. You know, so that's what it is. You know what time it is.
Starting point is 00:13:28 You know what time it is. You know what time it is. It's Lola Time. You know what time it is. You know what time it is. You know what time it is. It's Lola time. They should be asked for that.
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Starting point is 00:14:12 And you've got to support our show and let them know that we see. sent you and the blankets are great. You know what time it is. You know what time it is. You know what time it is. You know Dylan. You know, Dylan, personal story about Lola Blah.
Starting point is 00:14:27 Yeah, yeah. I had my sister-in-law, Amy, over the house this year. Real bitch. Oh, I can't stand her at all. Yeah, yeah, yeah. She walked into our... I mean, everybody knows that.
Starting point is 00:14:38 She walked into our guest bedroom. There was a Lola Blanket sitting there. She says, can I use this tonight when I sleep on your living room colors. Because she's too cheap to rent a hotel. And you know what I told her? I said you can't use that blanket. You know what happened, though?
Starting point is 00:14:53 What? She snuck it. And therein lies the true beauty of Lola. Even reptilian creatures can feel the softness. Because usually a reptile out in the wilder, they won't. They care about blankets. But even Lola blankets of a chameleon, something snake-like,
Starting point is 00:15:12 rolls up on one of those that go, what the heck is this? You know what time it is. It's a slow a time. We're also brought to you today by a magical company called Giu. I love Gio. Gio. Gio.
Starting point is 00:15:28 I can't keep it in the house. Can't keep enough of it in the house. I mean, these, you know, these Silicon Valley guys, they're building all these bunkers everywhere and stuff like that. And if they took themselves seriously, they took their skin seriously,
Starting point is 00:15:42 they wouldn't have enough room. in that bunker for all the food and life stuff you need. Because that's how much you're going to buy when you start getting in with this stuff. Okay, Korean skincare is the creme de la creme. You know, when you're walking down the street, you see a beautiful one. You go, oh, my God, what does she do with her skin? I don't know, but I bet it's Korean. Hey, talk about stuff.
Starting point is 00:16:04 Well, I got, they sent us some samples. And my wife's like, oh, look at this. I said, hey, you can't touch these. I need to have these for when we do the ad reads. we got to have these in the background for our sponsors. She didn't care what I said. Yeah. She took them.
Starting point is 00:16:19 She brought them right into her bathroom. She used them all in a week. I said, when I came up, I said, I need those. She said, do you see me and look how beautiful I am? I said, yeah. She said, I used them all. Yeah. Well, the same thing happened with my wife and my sister took everything to.
Starting point is 00:16:32 I mean, they just take. And usually they don't because we usually don't get sponsored by a perfect three-step skin care routine. That's Korean to clarify, treat, and protect. It's three products, one simple routine. It's about three minutes a day. It's everything we love about Korean skin care without needing an entire bathroom full of products. There's snail mucin for hydration and glow.
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Starting point is 00:17:55 It's GEU time. Yeah, we love Joy so much. I think she's been, she's my favorite chef in some time. Oh, yeah. And just an awesome cast member. But I'm confused why she's entertaining Luke in any way, shape, or form. Because it's stimuli. Mm-hmm.
Starting point is 00:18:21 You know, you brought up prisoner of war and... He's that extra rice ball on Christmas. You know, fans of this show know that we can do five minutes on prisoners of war. Hocchemen City Falls, you're stuck there. You're getting stabbed at. but let's move on sure okay all right meanwhile messy's confused about what the fuck just took place yeah and Nate helps him he coaches him up on the drama of the boat and messy has an opinion on the matter and I'd love to discuss it but I have no idea what the what the fuck he said well he said
Starting point is 00:19:02 my god I mean did this guy have a golden dick is that what he said yeah wow he said this guy's causing a lot of trouble he's not even here uh now ayesha heads down to talk to jen because Asia is a sweetheart. And Jen does a little inventory on what's been happening to her, aka what she has been causing herself on this boat. Is this calling her mom? I'm not sure. Hmm.
Starting point is 00:19:31 I think it was more her just listing, like, you know, Joy's mad at me. Luke and I didn't work out. Yeah. Oh, this is when... Kat's mad at me, all this stuff. Kermit comforts her. And how Kermit tries to solve this problem and make Jen feel better, it says, I have an idea.
Starting point is 00:19:53 You're demoted. You see that small room that's very hot? And no one talks to you all day? Right, all right. It's called the laundry dundron. Go in there. For the next three days. For the next three days.
Starting point is 00:20:06 I want you inside that prisoner of war like environment. That'd be good for you. That'd be good. Turns out she was wrong. She miscalculated because Jen descended into madness, kind of heart of darkness, nightmare.
Starting point is 00:20:21 She started washing her enemy's clothing with garlic racks. So, Asia doesn't miss often, but that was not a good move. No, no, no,
Starting point is 00:20:32 neither was sending those texts that you say, this is going to be the last one. I swear to God, this is the last you'll ever hear from me, you piece of shit. No. No.
Starting point is 00:20:40 As I was watching that transpire, I was like, we've all been there. Yeah. We all sent that text. You'll never hear from me again. All right. Only to stare at your phone 85 times in an hour waiting for response. You got to go do something else. You got to get out of the house, leave your phone.
Starting point is 00:21:00 Oh, you can't leave your phone, but you'd like to. So Joy, she says you've got to give guys time out when they've done something wrong. And when they've done stuff or something right, you have to, you know, recognize it. Now, my problem- And then you let them out of that timeout out of the corner. I like how she equates what Luke did, which was essentially treating his roommates' sheets like a fucking science experiment to a third-grader chewing gum in class. Well, but it's also this thing where joy is, it's more about like, obviously what Luke has done and what Luke did in the past. or the actions of an insane person or somebody who is taking just way too much creatine or whatever.
Starting point is 00:21:48 But it's more about who Luke is. I mean, all of us can see from a mile away that he's, I don't mean to be, maybe I should. You're going to say something very disparaging about the man? Yeah, I was going to say something fairly disparaging about the man. I don't mind saying it. Well, let's just go with blockhead fuck boy. He's a blockhead fuck boy.
Starting point is 00:22:08 He's a blockhead fuck boy. And he is now fixated on a girl he has yet to have sex with. And once he gets her, he'll be bored with her and he'll move on to the next thing. Yeah. Do you think that blockhead fuckboys recognize the hijacking of the behavior? It's almost like a parasite is taken over. When a fuck boy identifies prey or a mark and their experience. experiencing difficulty getting it over the line.
Starting point is 00:22:41 There's a manic quality that sets in. And I'm wondering if they recognize that they're like rutting, you know, well, smart one would. And then they go seek help, like a men's group therapy in 2012 to work those problems out. Yeah. Am I being too specific?
Starting point is 00:22:58 Well, well, maybe not, but I think it's broad enough to not be too specific. I would say that Luke is no different than Jen right now. I mean, Luke is in his own laundry. Hold on. She's 22 and just boy crazy nutbag.
Starting point is 00:23:12 He's a 35-year-old developed brain and he's still bringing this into his midlife. So, of course, what he's doing is worse than what Jen is. But what I'm saying is they're both trapped in a laundry room obsessing over this person. So, yeah. He's worse in my opinion. Joy, you are so much better than entertaining this guy. All right. So let's take a break to FaceTime with Joe's mom.
Starting point is 00:23:37 and I want to pause and ask... Joe, I'm going to live my son. Turns out these things, they're called doctors, Joe. So when I called you and traumatize you, because I'm an insane person, I had no idea. Doctors existed, Joe. Joe, I love you. Apple don't fall far from the fucking crazy tree.
Starting point is 00:24:01 You want to know where that idiot came from? Can I say, in my notes, you rudely cut me off, but I apologize. Thank you. I was going to say, the note is let's take a break to FaceTime with Joe's mom, and I want to pause here and ask you to please be respectful, given that this is a woman who's diagnosed with breast cancer, right? So it's a pretty big deal.
Starting point is 00:24:31 Right. All right. So we get to some, meanwhile, and I would like to get to Cooper being a, just Cooper we see you buddy i mean drop the carolinian schick all right you're a no mint julep you're a blockheaded fuck boy as well you're a sea rat okay all right is this what so this is him talking to joe okay so yeah coop chats with joe about joe the whole about his lady troubles and joe currently uh certainly knows uh about being a fuck boy so i'm sure he can give good advice about that Yeah.
Starting point is 00:25:08 Now, maintaining a healthy relationship, Coop might want to seek advice elsewhere. Now, I want to say this. Coop frames Cat as crazy because Jen is flirting with him. Yeah. Okay. Amazing. And gross. Gross.
Starting point is 00:25:28 So gross. I want a personal story here. G.R. gross. Gross. Okay. There is, this is something you owe someone that you like or you like. you're dating. My wife and are at this shit bar in Studio City called Fox and Hound. This is when we're
Starting point is 00:25:44 first dating for about eight months. Fox and Hound's a wonderful place. Rough crowd in there. And at the time, it's a great place between the hours of 6 a.m. and 11 a.m. Watching shock. Any time after that, what are you doing there? We had gone to the Hollywood Bowl and then with some friends, we got back 10.30, we hit the bar. It's got a bunch of drunken guys playing darts, whatnot. So I go into, to the bathroom. When I come out of the bathroom, there's this like, little live music. Oh, no, no. Little 311 cover band. There's like this guy that's like 10 years older, like hitting on my wife. He's got his arm up against the wall where she's waiting for the bathroom.
Starting point is 00:26:22 She looks uncomfortable. And I'm like, I walk over and I'm like, hey, honey, how you doing? And she's uncomfortable. And, uh, and I was like, oh, well, I'm going to get us a drink. And then I see her like trying to be nice. And finally she just says, hey, I got a boyfriend. he's like, I don't care if you got a boyfriend. She goes, get out of here. And I, like, respected that so much for her to just, like, just get out. Like, leave me alone. Me, I'm such a pussy and always trying to be polite.
Starting point is 00:26:51 I'd be like, ah, well, I got a girlfriend. And, like, for her to just, like, cut it off right there. So I think that's what you want a person that you're dating to just cut it off. And Kube owed that to Kat to just cut it off and go, Jen, look, this is too much. uncomfortable. Yeah, and they're not, they're not dating, so he doesn't have to necessarily do that,
Starting point is 00:27:15 but what he certainly cannot do is open himself up to said flirtation, then criticize Kat for being upset about it. Being upset about it. That's right. That is not okay. Also, I want to clarify two things, too. I can spell gross, the word gross.
Starting point is 00:27:30 I can spell it. And I also know that mint juleps are kind of like a Kentucky thing. Oh, these are so gross. Have you had one of those? I mean, it's just whiskey. It's whiskey and... It's whiskey, simple syrup, and mint. And mint or something.
Starting point is 00:27:48 They're not good. Have one at the racetrack. I mean, I think that's all it is. Isn't that what it is? There's like three or four ingredients. It's like a fucking true, like, Southern Alcoholics beverage. At the racetrack, it sounds so good when you order it. What is it?
Starting point is 00:28:03 Yeah, it's just mint leaves, simple syrup and bourbon. You nailed it. Okay. it's it's a fraudulent because you see it it's in that glass and it's got that name god how that dances off the tongue right a jula a jula i thought it was going to be a little bit more uh fruity yeah you think there would be some fruit in there did not look at the ingredients no we skipped over one thing k and cat both attempt to comfort jen despite her being horrible to both of them yeah okay that speaks volumes to me. Yeah, Kay and Kat are two really, really lovely. I think that the light, the light, and I mean,
Starting point is 00:28:43 seriously, like, we've got some angelic light in the interior. I think that Aisha, Kaylee, and Kat had they not, you know, seriously overwhelmed the darkness of Jen, the interior would have been a mess. If there were two gens, we would have some serious problems. Well, also, we might have had a problem this season with Interior if we did not have the dark heart of Jen. It would have been a pretty boring season. 100%. You need that. And I think it was just great casting this season.
Starting point is 00:29:14 Everybody was fantastic. And it's been an awesome, awesome season of below deck season 11, below deck met. All right. So Joy says, no. She's annoyed by the preferences. We have a carbivore. I did this diet once. This is TMI.
Starting point is 00:29:29 I would eat a bagel for, lunch and I'd eat a burrito that just consisted of a flour tortilla with beans in it. And I'd poop once a week. I lost a ton of weight. You could see my spine. Right. But run me through that, a bagel and then a tortilla with beans on it is the only thing that you ate?
Starting point is 00:29:52 And I'd eat, I'd eat just dry corn flakes as a snack. Okay. Complete carbs. I'd poop once a week. Right. Well, the reason why you lost weight is because you didn't have any calories. Well, no, that's a ton of calories. A bagel would be like 400 calories.
Starting point is 00:30:11 Okay. And then a tortilla with beans is another, what, 400 calories? Yeah, it'd be like 1,000, $1,500. Okay. So you're a man who's 6 foot 2 and you're having 800 calories of food a day. I was a carbivore. It worked, but I was always hungry. There's another word for that.
Starting point is 00:30:30 Yeah. eating disorder yeah let's get to uh the guests arrive we've got shots of kelly's rump no not kelly's rump who's the lady in this green dress it was very intrusive i would say i mean the camera's right there on a rump um the ladies are just jammed to be there and kelly the blow up doll i was so sick of this bit they really committed to it i got to say um we get to the vacation but uh quick thing before docking. Joe and Nathan get on the radio at the same time. Very, just a minuscule
Starting point is 00:31:11 happenstantial accident, right? And Joe goes, do you want to go first? Do you want to go first? You remember that tenacious D bit? No. Where you got a, oh, no, that's not tenacious D. It's from saving Silverman. Oh. You got to do the, they're going to kidnap a man to Pete, and they're communicating on walkie-talkies,
Starting point is 00:31:39 and Jack Black's inside, and he goes, and then the Waki makes that sound, too. But Jack Blacks thinks that you have to make that sound in order for the communication to be... See, I didn't even see that movie, and I had that film. Look at me.
Starting point is 00:31:54 Have you seen that movie? A while ago. I think we should ditch this bit. let's move on okay so um but but but but nathan upon hearing joe go do you want to go first goes you're fucking piece of shit hey hey hey hey hey hey you got some anger problems huh as is evidenced by you being on the lamb the run from the police for choking out your girlfriend can i can i point out something i forgot to say on that little uh rant i did about that him being a piece of shit yeah his passport's been taken away.
Starting point is 00:32:28 He can't go anywhere. No, he's hiding out under a bridge and he might just choose to morph into a full-blown homeless person for the rest of his life. Who do you think's a worse, more dangerous man to have aboard a vessel, Nathan or Gary King? I know, right? Oh, my God.
Starting point is 00:32:49 Sophie's dress. I know. These two guys are, and can I say something really quickly about, you know, there's been a lot of riffraff from, God, I want to be careful with the language. I don't want to say has-beens because we have a lot of people who we're very friendly with who are great people and are not has-beens. Haley DeSolipinto, you know, lovely people. And I don't mean them when I'm using that language, but somebody like, Ben, has been talking about how we saw this with love is blind.
Starting point is 00:33:29 where there are certain inhumane conditions required for entertaining the masses. And perhaps it isn't fair to be blindsided by, you know, some unsaid environmental issues when you're being cast on these shows. But if these sea rats could for a moment have some kind of, I don't know, Christ-like foresight and recognize that we need their pain in times like these. Love is Blind, Podrats came out, said this wasn't okay for us to be treated like this. And what happened to the show? It got fucking milk-toasty.
Starting point is 00:34:14 It got boring. And now it's quite frankly an awful television show. Below deck is consistently pretty great. And I just don't want people like Ben. coming out and scaring production into breaking the recipe of this show. I think just do some background checks moving forward. You know, not catching that Nathan had an arrest warrant in Ireland.
Starting point is 00:34:40 You know, it's a really good point because we have, we've hired some people. Like, we hired that one international criminal who was just on the boat. And he didn't, what was his name? Like,
Starting point is 00:34:49 dooms or something? We don't even know what his real name was. But they did catch that, though. Yeah, they didn't get it at casting, but Sandy got it. Yeah, Sandy got it.
Starting point is 00:34:57 she said, guys, you've hired an international criminal. I mean, this is, his fake identification. He might work for the CIA. I don't know what's going on here. There was a chef one time where I believe she lied on her CV. I mean, she showed up in first night, I forget what the Russian spy made, but she definitely had no credentials on. Yeah, no, she made, I believe, it might not have been night one,
Starting point is 00:35:17 but she did at one point make your favorite food. Nachos. Notchos. That was, the dish was topped with corn that came. directly from a can. You know the grimy solution of canned vegetables, how like a garbonzo bean will have a snot to it that you
Starting point is 00:35:35 have to rinse off. Corn as well. Not to Mishka or whatever her name is. She just dumped all that snot right on those chips. Okay? So yeah, I agree. Let's do some background checks. But also, just let the show be the show. All right, they know that they've made mistakes. So
Starting point is 00:35:50 we undocked, Joe gets some compliments and Nathan is not happy, especially when Joe is invited to drive the boat. I love this move from Sandy. I adore this move from Sandy. Just heaping praise on him in front of Nathan, giving him the steering wheel of the vessel in front of Nathan.
Starting point is 00:36:15 I don't know if production asked her to do this. I don't know if she just did this. This is a savvy, really entertaining move. And we've seen some kind of fight at the end in the hallway, I think. Oh, you're talking about, Yeah, and for some reason, Nate's wearing like a, like he's going out to a nightclub or something like that. Yeah, so I don't know. This may boil over in a pretty significant way.
Starting point is 00:36:36 I mean, they hate each other tremendously. Yes, they do. All right. We get to Jen, who can't believe that she used to go out with pro athletes and she's flipping out over Woody from Toy Story. She got dumped five minutes after jerking off Woody from Toy Story. Yeah. And as a result, she sends the always regrettable A. angry text.
Starting point is 00:36:59 I think that both of the things that you mentioned are like kind of tenuously truthful. So professional athletes like let us know, but also like Javanese guys who do that sport where they throw shit at walls. That doesn't really count. But maybe I don't know. I don't want to, I don't want to say that you're not being honest. but Luke is not Woody from Toy Story either. Okay, he's a giant meathead.
Starting point is 00:37:32 I mean, the guy looks like he weighs 240 pounds. So anyways, Jen continues to be just, listen, like you said, it's a bad idea to put her in that room all by herself. She's going insane, okay? Crat history. Ah. Kat's mom said, go explore the world. Do not go to law school.
Starting point is 00:37:51 Your thoughts? Um. I guess we're still waiting to see if that advice panned out. Yeah, and I think that's the correct answer, you know, because I'm stuck between two worlds, right? Either, you know, go establish yourself, get your career going so that you can have, you know, a stable life, maybe even a good one. Or go see the world. For a little while, then come back. Those gap years usually lead to longer term adventures, though, I'm going to say.
Starting point is 00:38:27 But cats got a good head on her shoulders. Right, because it's hard to show up at a freshman class at 22 with a bunch of 18-year-olds. You start looking around and go, oh, this is weird. Maybe I should just quit. And then before you know it, you're back on those boats. Well, I mean, now, before you know it, you turn around and there's like a legit old guy in the back of the classroom. And he's 75, and he just wanted to come back to school. And because you're a freak to the other kids, you befriend him.
Starting point is 00:38:55 It is a buddy. cop movie essentially. And you learn about life from him, you know. Kind of driving Miss Daisy, but less racist. Was that movie? That was a racist movie, right? Never saw it. Did you see it?
Starting point is 00:39:14 Never. In the comments, let us know. Who was the driver? Oh, well, it was, uh, it certainly wasn't Miss Daisy. I think they bang, though. Oh, nice. All right. Now, let's get to, let's get to the C-Rat history.
Starting point is 00:39:27 Sure. that really has some meat on the boat, Dylan. And that is one messy. And it's really on brand. His family were all secret. Wait, do it? We get a C-Rater.
Starting point is 00:39:38 No, no, no. This is not, we... Oh, well, I was going to jump ahead. How were you going to jump ahead? We got, we have... We got to get to lunch. Well, no. She fucking...
Starting point is 00:39:48 This is where she sends the text to Luke. She says you've made an extremely... Yeah, yeah, I said that. You've made a decision to leave the boat, and you have been extremely distressed. respectful to me. This is the last text you will receive from me. Now, as we go throughout the episode,
Starting point is 00:40:10 I do want to read all of the texts. Okay? We get to lunch. Jen breaks more cups. Honestly, it's the thing that she's best at on this boat is breaking cups. And while lunch is being served, Jen speaks about the stress from the, this boat and what it is doing to her wrist.
Starting point is 00:40:36 Okay, go ahead. Let's talk about sea rat history with Misa. Oh, okay. What's his name? Massey. We get some sea rat history from Messi. It's totally on brand. He comes from a family of sea creatures, as we expect.
Starting point is 00:40:49 So right around the time his pubs started sprouting out of his sea slug, his family sold him to a grizzled old sea cal. Why do you have to... Well, anyway, and now he chain smokes. He is kind of badass. I mean, he's not too dissimilar to the actual messy. Kind of a child prodigy in many regards. Have you ever seen Leo Messi play a soccer game ever?
Starting point is 00:41:19 I have. You have? Very impressive. Really? Yeah, someone showed me some footage of him. Well, you showed me some, and then another person that I met showed me some. And then I saw some footage of his dad dying and they did a memorial of all the footage of him being young, kick an ass. His dad?
Starting point is 00:41:34 Watching him kick ass. Oh, okay. Rest in peace. Okay, so gazpacho with a crusted tomato and potato. I love gazpacha. No, you don't. Oh, I meant to say, what's that stuff where it has, it's like a little miniature little pie. but it's like an entree and you have to worry about like the crust popping up and then you pop it.
Starting point is 00:42:08 All right. So just if you could put yourself in my shoes for a second, we're starting with gazpacho. Right. And we're moving on. It's kind of like a soup, but it has this tomato soup, but it has this wonderful little top over it. It's like a chicken pot pie. But it's tomato soup. Mm-hmm.
Starting point is 00:42:26 Okay, that's not a thing. Mm-hmm. Yeah. that's not a thing. Never has been a thing. Maybe you went somewhere once and they did that there, but usually people don't put puff pastry on top of tomato soup. You have to worry if the crust is cooking, it doesn't pop.
Starting point is 00:42:43 You said that, yeah. Let me think about it while you're going through the rest of that lunch. Absolutely. Take your time. All right. So we've also got a piped potato dumpling, a potato duchess, which was, I thought, a really beautiful offering for the, fellow carbivore.
Starting point is 00:43:03 Now, Jan continues to implode, speaking on how he is a manchild at 35 being Luke, and she texts again after saying this is the last she'll receive from me. She says, you have no idea what you've, and this is my favorite. So you say usually when, and Pat said we've all been there,
Starting point is 00:43:23 and we really have all been there. But usually when you say, this is the last you'll hear from me, the follow-up does, not a dress that in fact it was not the last duty. All right. Remember what I said in the last text that this would be, I forgot to tell you. Right. This.
Starting point is 00:43:41 It's usually not that. There's no couching it. It's just more anger. So she says, you have no idea what you've caused me. This season has been insane because of you. And I want to think, I want you to think about how the flowers you sent almost caused me to leave this boat. Jen, I hate to break it to you. He really does not care. Although I think there's a world where he and Jen could get married. I really do. Oh, maybe later on. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:44:08 But, you know, that is the funny thing is, is what you have to realize that I guess, why are you sending this text, right? And do you realize that the person that's receiving it absolutely does not care? I think they're perfect for each other, quite honestly. I really do. They're perfect for one another. God. Imagine them at home, just pizza in, right? Watching practical magic too when it comes to video on demand.
Starting point is 00:44:40 I can see that? Yeah. Can I say a personal story? Kalan, will you allow it? I'll allow it. Okay. I hook up with this girl. She's kind of dating this guy.
Starting point is 00:44:48 Sex? Yes. Okay. And she's only in town for like a week. And then I said, wow, I'd like to see again, she lives in Las Vegas. She's a... No, you had sex or he... In Los Angeles.
Starting point is 00:45:00 And she had a boyfriend. She'd be dating a guy. Probably she, whatever. All right. And anyway, I was like, I really kind of like she's fun. She's a cruise ship dancer. So she'd have to fly into San Diego, get on a boat, be gone for three months. Spitfire and stuff like that.
Starting point is 00:45:15 Cruise ship dancer. I don't know if she's spit fire. Anyway, I'm like, well, hey, I want to hang out whenever you're in town if you want it. And she's like, eh, probably not. I was like, oh, okay. So we went out to dinner one last time, and she's like, yeah, we probably shouldn't hook up. I was like, all right. So we had each other's number.
Starting point is 00:45:33 I was like, well, if you ever change your mind, I really like to see you again. She's like, yeah, okay. I don't call her. I'm just like, she said no more. Yeah. Right. And then it was her birthday, like three months later. I just said, hey, happy birthday.
Starting point is 00:45:47 I hope you're doing good. You knew when her birthday was. Well, she had told me or something. It was like, maybe it was St. Patrick's Day or something like that. I don't know. It was on a holiday. You said happy. St. Patrick's Day.
Starting point is 00:45:56 No, I said happy birthday because, anyway, I just, I fucking said it. Okay. But it was like a memorable thing. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But it was kind of just... Like she was born on 9-11 or something. Yeah, I said, you know, hey, happy birthday. I hope you're still working or whatever.
Starting point is 00:46:10 But it was just like a thing. She immediately responds and says, I'm going to be in town. Yeah. And then when she comes into town, we go out to a bar. Of course, we have sex. And she goes, you know what? I want to tell you, because you never called me, that was so fucking hot.
Starting point is 00:46:27 Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. The point is absence makes the hot grow. was fonder. Her biggest mistake was if she didn't, if Jen never fucking contacted Luke, he'd want to bang her again. Yeah. That's the moral to the story. The moral of the story is do not be a nutback. That's right. Yeah. Just let it breathe. That's right.
Starting point is 00:46:53 All right. Joy gives Luke a ring and God, I wanted to repeat what you said about what absence does to the heart. But I, For the life of me, couldn't sit. I'm on medication. So Joy, it's probably the Diet Pepsi, just with a nasty entanglement, the antibiotics. So Joy gives Luke a ring. Luke says, listen, I don't know what's going on, but I've been getting some text from Jen.
Starting point is 00:47:22 And I'm here to tell you right now, I don't have time for all this drama. God, he is fucking gross. What an asshole. Oh my God. You're putting this on joy. And also, hey, Luke, you have all the time in the world for drama. You just got fired. What are you doing besides sitting around?
Starting point is 00:47:45 Right. And trying to negotiate with florists. What's the cheapest one? What if I saw some, I saw a dumpster out back. Yeah. Can you guys, let me ask you something. Can you get that down at all? Sir, we're a florist.
Starting point is 00:48:04 All right, let me ask you this. You know the trimmings you guys have where you cut the bottom of the stems off? Yeah. Could you put all that in a pot? Would that look good? No, it wouldn't. But we can send that for just the shipping cost. Would you say the cheapest was to get?
Starting point is 00:48:23 All right. All right. All right. So then we hear Kaylee, who tells us she knows Joe's got a reputation, but she hasn't experienced it. Last week we- No, you have. You were in the... middle of experience.
Starting point is 00:48:35 Oh, yeah, that's right. We said Joe was a slime ball and people came to his defense saying he was up front with Kaylee. Did you see that post that we did where we were like to? Okay. So it was where he did that whole thing for her brother's birthday. Uh-huh. And people were like, hey, he's been up front with her saying, I don't want any commitment.
Starting point is 00:48:55 Our point was he's such a manipulative piece of shit. Yeah. He hadn't slept with her yet. And the whole point of him doing that was so. he could see her vagina. He hadn't seen it yet. He's emotionally manipulative. Yes, that was our point.
Starting point is 00:49:10 We know that they'd agreed that they were just not going to, there was no relationship in the future. Sure. He did that because he was motivated by seeing her vagina. Yeah, no, people got to calm down. We do not know what we're saying. Well, we do. I mean, but yeah, but we're talking about below deck and we're coming in here.
Starting point is 00:49:30 I mean, he's hopped up on antibiotics. I'm hopped up on whatever I'm hopped up on. I mean, this guy's just crushing Corona lights and jerky all the time. I mean, you shouldn't listen to a thing we say. Okay, so Joe says that she wanted a stable life, but, wait, so what? Joy says that she wanted a stable life, but. She's talking to Kermit about this. Yeah, she's talking to Kermit about it.
Starting point is 00:49:57 And she goes, you know, I, I struggle so much with stability on land because I'm lonely. I'm not in the mix with people that often. And Asia starts talking about the balance you have to strike as a sea rat as a kind of aquatic nomad. And she speaks on how grateful she is that she's found a life partner in Scott who, although I got to, we got to talk to Scott. You can't be going out and doing this squirrel stuff, this squirrel suit stuff and parachuting into rocks and stuff. I mean, you're going to end up on a YouTube compilation of people fucking crashing into cliffs. And Asia deserves somebody that's going to stick around for forever, okay? Just be careful out there, all right?
Starting point is 00:50:40 But she says that her and Scott are going to try to merge a nomadic and traditional life, making it a traumatic life. She, how do you think that's going to go? Well, probably pretty good. Yeah, I believe in these two kids. Now, I thought Kermit was trying to slowly, wind down off this show. I thoroughly believe now she's here to stay. I hope so. I mean, I'm cool with it. Yeah, I could take another five years Asia easy. All right. So we get to some
Starting point is 00:51:16 water fun, but first, do you remember how Jen said that she was going to never speak to Luke again? Well, this is the third text that she's sending him. Well, he hasn't responded yet. He does respond here. He says, you do not. have the authority to tell me what to do with my life. Can you imagine the two of the... This is why I think they're perfect for one another. The fights, oh my God, the melodrama that would swallow them into the earth together. I mean, it would be really, really beautiful.
Starting point is 00:51:49 It's crazy. I got an idea, Luke. How about I fucked up. I'm sorry I hurt you like that. I should have been more mature about this. Anything like, yeah, I'm sorry. I said that you were crazy. Wow. Okay. At this point, Sandy finds out about the night shift that Nathan has set out for Joe.
Starting point is 00:52:12 The double shifts that are dangerous. Yes. Sandy deduces that Nathan is trying to fuck Joe with a horrible schedule. And she says, hey, knock it off. Now, Sandy, I think, understands why this is even darker than, I think, he understands the real darkness of this move. And she kind of alludes to it that she's fired people for falling asleep on Anchor Watch. And I think that Nate knows that not only is he putting him in a position where he's going to have to be down for a good portion of the day, so he can't be with the guest, he can't be with his girlfriend, he can't be with the rest of the boat. He's iced him out.
Starting point is 00:52:56 But he's also put him in a situation where he could really damage the boat and fuck up. his work. Nate is a disgusting human being. He really is a gross human being. And that's not any like, you can't really, I mean, I guess you can grow your way out of that,
Starting point is 00:53:16 but he's not young enough for us to allot this leash to him. You go, he's a young guy, he's dealing with hair follicles, stuff like that. He's probably on finasteride or whatever. No,
Starting point is 00:53:25 there is a fucking dementer-like quality to this guy. I just really, really do not like him. Yeah. I agree. No jokes. No. I just,
Starting point is 00:53:37 just gross. All right. So let's do a quick talk with Asia and Jen. Jen says, oh, this is ridiculous. Wow. Jen goes up to her boss and says, hey. She's upset.
Starting point is 00:53:55 Well, she says, hey, I need to speak to you. And Asia goes, what's going on? And she says, Luke's been sending. sending me text messages. And I just cannot even imagine what's going through Aisha said right now. Now, if we got to interview Jen, which she would never show up on this podcast, Jen, why did you say that? Why did you say I have to talk to you or why did you say Luke's been sending me text? That's right.
Starting point is 00:54:30 Could you explain that? Which one? Both. Okay. Why did you go to her? and why did you frame that? What were you trying to get out of that? Well, she went to Aisha because she's been in the laundry chamber all day
Starting point is 00:54:44 and she needs some kind of companionship. Fuck. And Aisha has making, she's made a mistake in offering her some kind of compassion masquerading his friendship or mentorship earlier in the day. So Jen, because Jen is a little nuts, as are all of us. I mean, I'm a little nuts. We all are. but because Jen is a little nuts, she perceives that as,
Starting point is 00:55:07 I have a full-blown best friend now. We've said in the past, she does not like her. So it's very confusing to get that confused about it. But also, the way she frames the correspondence volume with Luke and her is pathological. And there's some girl-interrupted stuff going on here with Jen. I think I'm actually quite scared of Jen. I mean, we'd love to have her on the show. I don't know why she would come on.
Starting point is 00:55:36 Well, she'd come on Zoom. She couldn't hurt us, I don't think. I know, but she'd fuck me up in a fight, I think. I'm kidding. I would fucking, dude, I would beat the shit. No, I'm kidding. All right, so let's get to a...
Starting point is 00:55:50 Dinner. Quick talk. Yes, dinner. It's a 70s night. And please do not, please do not even think for a second about writing anything about joking about domestic violence while Nathan has done this.
Starting point is 00:56:04 I'm joking around, okay? I watched right up until the point where one of the hosts joked about domestic violence. I'll never watch their channel again. Please. Please. I would say the same thing about a five-year-old. I would beat the fucking shit out of a five-year-old. I kick a five-year-old down the fucking stairs.
Starting point is 00:56:24 All right. Okay. I'm kidding. Let's get to set. Well, I'm kind of not kidding. I mean, if you know, we got to talk about this on APS, but I had to go to that restaurant that we were talking about with the children. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:56:38 And, you know, there was some, there was some, there were some foul play with the kids. And it's tough when you see another kid being a little piece of shit to your kid. You got to go, I will kick you down a flight of stairs. But you can't do that. No, no, no. But anyways, we'll talk about stuff like that at Patreon. Okay, so Nathan pulls,
Starting point is 00:56:57 um, Nathan pulls a gin before we get to dinner and wines to Massey. Massey, I cannot imagine what Massey thinks of Nathan. Massey, who has been at sea, he is a sea creature. He has real experiential confidence in where he's at. Seeing this just small, tiny ego flipping out in front of him, he must just be like, my God, this guy is fucking pathetic. What are you doing, dude? at work.
Starting point is 00:57:35 But he tells Nathan, upon hearing another complaint about Joe, he goes, 12 to 6 is so easy. I don't know what the problem is. He goes, hey, man, just don't talk to me about it. Just stop
Starting point is 00:57:51 even thinking about it. Dinner is a guacamole and a tortilla. This is a hideous dish. It's presented atop a lopsided bed of puffed rice or something like that. And we've discussed this, but Joy has really, you know, taken a double black diamond down to where she now knows is adequate food.
Starting point is 00:58:16 She's busy. What? Joy, she's busy. With what? With Luke. He's in her head. I think Joy can do a lot better, but I think that she recognizes she doesn't need to, and this is about having fun.
Starting point is 00:58:32 Right. Okay. So, like it's so weird on this show, the appetizer can be a fried tortilla with avocado inside of it on randomly a bed of puffed rice. But if you make marzipan fake spaghetti, which, again, is no small feat. It's like, well, why don't you just make the dinner better? You are in the clear. And the guests are going to really enjoy themselves.
Starting point is 00:59:01 It's very confusing. we get a little C-Rat history with some grudge holding and Jen. Yeah, I didn't catch all of Jen's history because we've been there so many times, but ultimately Jen is washing Joy's clothes with the rags. And Jen tells us she's always been resentful as a child, and she sees herself ultimately in her villain phase. I want to tell Jen this, Jen, villains are interesting, you're not. But it would be funny if your superpower was making webs out of torquing guys.
Starting point is 00:59:32 wangs. Mm-hmm. You know. Yeah. It's like a super inconvenient Spider-Man. Just like a cumbersome ability. I would go say that those kids.
Starting point is 00:59:45 That bus is coming straight towards them. But in order for me to get over there, I have to jack off like 15 men. And they have to come to climax. It's not like I can. It's quite the superpower. Can you imagine seeing it, though? Like she goes, all right, fine.
Starting point is 01:00:04 I'll go. And then she starts swinging. You're like, oh, my God. She really does have that fucking super bowl. She is impressive. Yeah, that is really impressive. But look, she's stuck there. She's got to jack up another person.
Starting point is 01:00:19 All right. So main course is, again, we found our baseline, right? This is going to be beef, the beef filet, and roasted vegetables. So this is what we're? going to be doing now. Massey gets some food from joy. He's such a cutie. He really, really likes her. And there's this sweet moment, sweet slash sad where the producer says, what's your type? And what is his answer? Any girl that says yes. That's normally the sentiment of any drunk guy at a bar at closing time. But that's his, that's his, that's his at any time of the day.
Starting point is 01:00:58 Yeah, I mean, if it gets, I'm not going to go there. So Jen, hates wearing the wrist brace because it makes her look like an MMA fighter. It does not. Jen, I feel bad for Jen. I really do feel bad for Jen because there are those people in work environment. I dare I say, I have a little love for Jen. I really do have a little love for Jen. Because she's just one of those people who's in an environment where she's not with her people.
Starting point is 01:01:37 These people are not her people. if she was at a I don't know a local game store playing Pokemon with people or something I don't know what her people are but these are not her people she's a fish out of water
Starting point is 01:01:52 and she's floundering she's panicking and she's being a weirdo and people are like I can get away from me we may hear from her and she'd say there's a bunch of footage you didn't see of me hanging out with the girls although we didn't interview with Kat
Starting point is 01:02:09 We're, uh, I think we, uh, we didn't see the worst of Jen. No. No, Jen was in a dark spot, but, uh, yeah, who knows if that'll be illuminated later. So Joe, uh, gets up for a night shift. Nathan passes the instructions off and then says under his breath, uh, fuck you, you fucking idiot or something like that. And we wake the next morning, Joy is missing, uh, rags when she goes into the galley and she finds them with a little. little note and a smiley face.
Starting point is 01:02:43 The note says, joy plus racks. Rags. Now, Joy says, Aisha, I need you to talk to her because if I talk to, if I talk to where she's going to need therapy and I'm going to make her cry. I go, I like that out of joy. I do wish that we could have seen that, but Aisha will handle this moment. Your thoughts on Jen washing her clothing with the rags. Well, think about this.
Starting point is 01:03:17 Joy did nothing to Jen. But she's seeking. Literally nothing. Revenge. She didn't have sex with Luke. She didn't do anything. All she did was be the apple of his eye. That's it.
Starting point is 01:03:32 So I might have already said this, so forgive me if this is a repeated thought. There are people that your wife or maybe, or you come home from work and you tell your spouse about this person that you're at work with that is just, and your spouse really doesn't believe you, they think you're over exaggerating about how much havoc this person is creating in the work environment. Yeah. This person is Jen. These people exist.
Starting point is 01:04:00 They exist in your job environment and they're not getting fired and they just make everybody life miserable and more difficult and you have to watch your back because they bring no positivity and all they do is fuck with you and that is jet yeah jens like chris pratt and that movie wanted what was it called the one with you know what i'm talking about yeah yeah yeah he was in that yeah what was that one with angeline joly and james macko jane james macko boy where they curved they curved the bullets oh what was that called it was wanted yeah chris pratt's in that Pratt is it like the office douchebag. Oh.
Starting point is 01:04:38 Was it chubby Chris Pratt? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. That movie, that sucked. Yeah, I don't remember it very well. Well, bullets just turn around and they have power to do that. It's the whole thing.
Starting point is 01:04:52 Well, I mean, let's not besperch the movie to, you know, egregiously. The bullets do not just turn around, okay? They curve because the people of this cult have figured out how to do that. that's pretty much the only thing they can do. I remember there being a loom at some point. There's a very important loom in the movie. Again, the comments, let us know if you've seen wanted. Let's know if you remember the loom.
Starting point is 01:05:22 Okay, so we get to... Oh, all right. Oh, my gosh. All right, so there's some crazy things here. All right, so Sandy asked Nate to change the Decky schedule to which, I think, like, I think she says, Just get on my computer. He snaps at her. And he's like, I got my own computer.
Starting point is 01:05:41 And she's like, don't give me any lip. Boy. Ooh, foo, all right. And then, meanwhile, Coop invites Joe on the trip as a threesome that he was going to just have with Kat. And this is postseason when they leave. Kat thinks she's just going to go on a trip with Coop for like three days. And now it's going to be Joe on that trip. And I'm sure she's going to love that.
Starting point is 01:06:03 Personal story. I was dating this girl. summer after senior year and you know wasn't being that good of a person she said you know I need to meet up with you and we need to talk and I said okay and I met up with her she answered the door and I was like hey how you doing this is your sweater and she goes thank you
Starting point is 01:06:24 do you want to come inside who is that I go oh that's my friend Connor he's waiting for me did you want to talk about something she was like well I wanted to sit down with you and I was like oh Connor though. I got to get going. She was like, okay. Well, I guess we'll talk later.
Starting point is 01:06:41 And then, you know, we didn't really talk much after that because she knew, oh, wow, this person is a massive asshole. And this is what guys who are being pussies do. They cannot have the conversation with you. It's too difficult to do. So they'll drag a bro along to confuse the situation and possibly still bang you if you're okay with him. This is not a monopoly of men.
Starting point is 01:07:06 women have done this as well. I've had to have a date. I one time had a date to go to a movie, Harry Potter of all shitty movies. And a girl shows up with her girlfriend to go on the date. Right. It's like, what are you doing? I was supposed to try to touch her boobs during the movie.
Starting point is 01:07:21 Yeah, this is going to be weird. Yeah. Well, she's going to just be sitting there? Yeah. I get it. We didn't know each other. It's fine. Okay, so, Cooper.
Starting point is 01:07:31 Cooper. Shame on you. Asia discusses this thing with the rag thing. She handles it pretty well. I'd argue it was a little too passive for my liking. I didn't think she handled it well at all. I think Aisha should have ripped her a new asshole. Yeah, you should never do that. Okay. Jen knows exactly what she did. And Aisha says, I wasn't in Jen's head. She wrote a note. There's literal evidence of her knowing what she was doing. Although Kermit's been doing this longer than you and I, so maybe she's reading the situation better
Starting point is 01:08:05 She doesn't care about Jen. She's got two more charters left. She's never going to work with Jen again. She doesn't want to get in any confrontation. So Aisha and Joy are really good together. There's this moment where Aisha goes, what's the plan for lunch? And Joy goes, no plan. We are not eating.
Starting point is 01:08:23 And just the sisterhood. And Joy was being legit. She had no idea what she was going to make for lunch because she is phoning it in. So Aisha and Nathan have a chat about Massey. And they both go, is fantastic. And Nathan goes, I love him so much. He's a lot better than Joe. And he goes, oh my God, between you and Jen, can I fucking, please get away from these people? I don't know what the hell happened in, there's this very convoluted incident in the lagoon. Okay, I'll break it down
Starting point is 01:08:55 real quick because we got to end the episode. Okay, so they all go to the lagoon. A couple of the women are actually professional swimmers. One of them was in the Olympics, I guess. They decide they want to swim back to the boat. So Messy radios back to Sandy. Sandy says, that's fine, but the tender must accompany them. Meanwhile, one of the women want to hang back. Just takes off. Well, two of the women take off. One of the women is
Starting point is 01:09:15 still there, so the tender can't just leave that single swimmer alone near the caves. Two women swim off. Now they're stuck in a bind. Joe goes screw it. I'll grab on one of those little James Bond little scooter boats and follow them. Nate gets pissed, comes to save the day. That
Starting point is 01:09:30 becomes, rather than Messy's fault and Joe's fault become specifically just Joe's fault. Boom. Next scene. Yeah, Joe's having a tough day. Joe's having a tough day. The women all want to go on that little spinny boat thing, which seems very dangerous to me. Yeah, anybody who's Ben Tubing knows that tubing is a little bit like the mint julep. On its face, it seems like an amazing, fun, fruity drink. But it's not. It's actually extremely dangerous. It can dislocate your arm, actually. So the ladies kind of impromptu invite, I believe,
Starting point is 01:10:03 Coup and Cat to come up. To weigh down the motherfucker. Right. It does not work. No. And Joe is driving the vessel and he speeds a little bit. The thing flips over. A woman, I believe Katz said she saw a bone extrude. You can see, you can
Starting point is 01:10:19 see it in the footage if you look closer enough and it's really gross. But her shoulder bone is like very low. Oh. On her arm. So usually it's up here and it's at socket, but hers was more by her rib cage. It's disgusting. Well, Nathan hears the news and says, fuck Joe.
Starting point is 01:10:38 He comes. I'm sure he's going to try and use this to get him waxed. Right, exactly. He calls his wife. I can't believe it. Gail, you're not going to believe it. And she's like, is Jen there? Yeah.
Starting point is 01:10:55 And then he tells her. And then she goes, do you want to ask about your son? He goes, oh yeah, how's he doing? All right, get in the comments. Let us know what you thought of the episode. We will be back next week for more below deck. Join us, Patreon.com, for Traitas, Double Lives, APS. There's so much stuff over there.
Starting point is 01:11:13 So go there, donate a little bit more. I'm Dylan, say goodbye. Pat, take your bye. Bye, dudes. Kalyn. Yeah.

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